Reddit Stories - I BELIEVE that my 29-YEAR-OLD PARTNER'S mother, who is 63 years old, might

Episode Date: February 19, 2026

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #relationshipadvice #familydrama #boundaries #communication #personalstoriesSummary: I believe that my 29-year-old partner's mother, who is 63 years old, might be overstepping boundaries in our relationship. Her actions often create tension, and I feel uncomfortable. It's essential to address this issue for the sake of our partnership and maintain a healthy dynamic with her.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, relationships, familydynamics, boundaries, communication, partnerissues, motherinlaw, personalgrowth, emotionalhealth, conflictresolution, advice, support, lifeadvice, storytelling, experiences, opinionsBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6816713/support.This episode includes AI-generated content.

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$2.2. Episode with two stories, first part. I hope you enjoy this story. I believe that my 29-year-old partner's mother, who is 63 years old, might be attempting to undermine my connection with my 31-year-old partner. Greetings to all in our relationship community. I have been observing for a while, and now I I am seeking guidance for the first time. Let's start. Get down to business. I've been with my fiancé Adam for five years and we've been engaged for seven months. We have a beautiful home together and we both work really hard at our relationship. The issue isn't with Adam. He does his very best to try to mitigate the situation with his mom, but it's wearing on him and I worry that one day he'll have to choose. I don't want him to have to do that, that would hurt him too much to choose between me and

his family. There are a lot of situations, but I thought I would highlight the worst slash most recent. One, about three years ago, one month after we purchased our house, his mom really needed windows in her house, mold was growing a lot and some no longer had seals. Now, his mom actually has a sizable savings account, enough that she can spend her money frivolously on luxury goods like Birken bags, and getting her hair done two times a week, her nails, buying a Mercedes every two years. and so on. However, she never budgets for anything. So, she asked him for $25,000 to replace the windows, he said he'd cover them. When he told me, I almost had a heart attack, he said it was a loan and that she'd pay him back. I still have law school debt to cover and we have a larger than we should

have mortgage. She made a comment to him about how I would let her freeze to death all winter and he had to help her. We took extra out on the mortgage to cover the windows, top of the line, everything, we still have yet to see a dime, I suppose it went into her new GL class, to quote the bard, neither a borrower nor a lender be. Two, Adam and I had a vacation planned a year after the window's dilemma happened. We decided that we'd go to Europe for two weeks as he has never been and I lived there from the time I was three until I came to America for school. We set our hearts on Spain and rented a lovely apartment in Barcelona for the two weeks. It was perfect for two. We planned all of our tours and outings around our interests.

Adam loves architecture, so we had a few tours solely planned for that. His mother decided that she had to come and she'd never been to Europe either. So she invited herself on our trip. Like I did previously, I tried to appeal to his rational side, but I couldn't get through his emotional side. So I just accepted that she'd be coming along. Well, coach wasn't good enough for her and she had to have tickets upgraded to business, but she didn't want to travel alone. So she pitched in for a seat for Adam to travel with her.

I had to remain in coach alone. Then, she didn't want to stay at the apartment because it wasn't a vacation to her. No, she had to stay at the W in Barcelona where she begged Adam to stay with her, but there wasn't any room for me. He tried to reason with her, but she cried and said how sad she was without her husband with her as he passed away before they could ever get to Europe together. He passed away 10 years ago. So, I stayed at the apartment alone while they stayed at the hotel. We were supposed to meet up for breakfast, but she would never get ready on time, so they wouldn't be down until 11 a.m. And we missed

most of our outings. I definitely felt like a third will in question why I even bothered to go on the vacation when I could have stayed home and not felt so alone. Three, Adam and I began to discuss wedding plans. I would like to keep it relatively low-key as my family still lives in Europe, and cannot attend as my father is very sick and we are worried he may take a turn for the worse. Traveling is just not worth it for him, and I wouldn't want him to risk his health for something that is a one-day event. I told Adam that I would like just a courtroom ceremony, and his mother and sister, of course, and friends. We'd then take everyone out. We'd then take everyone out for a very fancy dinner. His mother did not, I repeat, not take kindly to this.

She said that if her son was going to get married, it would have been a grand affair, for everyone to see. I just keep looking at my side of the seating chart, and the pitiful number of guests, I just want to cry, she has been planning it, I told Adam I didn't want this, I expressly told him that I just wanted a small. Really, really, really small event, no go, she won't even hear him, she just refers to me as her and she and says how I think that I'm too good for a large wedding and that my family is too good for America. My family is American, my dad is slash was an ambassador. Four, this has been happening a lot recently, and this time, it's just been one too many times. Lately, she has been asking for more together family time.

She lives quite close, but we don't see her all that often as she has friends and events that keep her busy, not too busy to plan the wedding though, she has requested that we, Adam and I, have dinner with her three times a week. Well, what has been happening is that she has been reserving a spot at the restaurant for 6 p.m. I don't get home until 6, 30-some nights. She has just been encouraging Adam to eat out with her as I am too thoughtless to come home at a decent hour to eat with her son, how lonely that must be for him. It honestly doesn't bother me that he goes out to eat with her that often. But the thing she says behind my back, well, I came home early tonight, I left work and was on the road by 4, 30 p.m., home by 5 p.m. I surprised Adam as he

was just coming in the door when I yanked the door open to greet him happily. He was so excited to see me. I could come to dinner with him and his mom. I told him I just needed to shower real quick and get dressed. He called his mom right away and told her that I would be able to make it. He also make a comment stating he hoped there was a reservation for three tonight. She said that there was, but she thought they'd eat earlier, like, 5, 30 and was already on her way to our house. She got there at 5, 15 and stated that she couldn't wait another second and had to eat right then. Adam said I'd be ready in just another 15 minutes and offered to call the restaurant and

request they move us back. She wouldn't hear it, she just whined about being hungry, and how a poor old woman should be expected to wait so his fiancé could fulfill her vain requirements. He came upstairs and asked how long I'd be, I said just another ten minutes. He said his mom was really upset and hungry, if I could skip a step for him so we could leave earlier. I told him to go ahead without me and I would meet them there. That was fine, I got there, and the table was for two, of course. Adam said we could make room, but she said how we'd be inconveniencing everyone and I should just go sit at the bar and she'd try to get it fixed. I had one

drink at the bar and then left, came home, calm down a bit, and now I'm writing this. Wow, that was long. I think I need to get that out there. I guess I figured everything out, though. Sorry to bother you or slash relationships, unfortunately, my relationship is over with Adam. I realized this as I poured my heart out to this sub. Thank you. Update, I think my, 29F, future mother-in-law, 63F, may be trying to sabotage my relationship with my fiancé, 31M. Wow. I really did not expect this kind of attention considering I pretty much came to a conclusion. Seems to be the general consensus among you that it's the right one, on my own, but the support, our slash relationships, the support you have given me, I'm overwhelmed and feel extremely

grateful in a way I cannot express. Through PMs and comment posts, I cried, reading all of them. Some of you shared words of wisdom, some of you shared different perspectives, others shared similar experiences, I feel at a loss for words. Anyway, there isn't a very impactful update, but I figured I would update you on what has happened so far and take this opportunity to say, thank you. Thank you. After I posted a comment on my own thread, and was about two glasses deep into a bottle of wine, Adam came home. This was extremely late. He He sat down beside me and looked defeated. He just looked at me with hopeless eyes.

I asked him if he wanted to talk about it. He said he needed time to process everything that happened tonight. I told him I also needed time. He said to me that whatever I wanted to do, he would accept it. So, I called up my maid of honor and asked if she would come pick me up and I could stay at her house for the night. Adam and I kissed, and he told me he loved me, and I left. I haven't been back, from Colleen's house. I made a call the next morning to my office asking for a few more days off to go visit my

family. So, right now, I am writing to you from my parents' house in Europe. I called Adam and told him my plans, and he asked me if I would let him drive me. I told him I was okay to go myself with Colleen, and I would email him when I got to my family home. When I got settled at home, I I emailed Adam, and I sent him the thread that I had made that Tuesday night. A large majority of you wanted him to read it. So, he has read all, all of your comments. He also read the part where I came to the conclusion on my own that I had to end things. We talked briefly over Skype.

He told me he felt raw from the thread, but he was glad that I had gotten things out. He asked me if I was sure if I wanted to break things off or if I still needed time to think. I said I was pretty sure. He asked me for a probability. This is a joke in our relationship for dealing with decisions, and I said I was 90% sure that this was the end for us, and I was using my time away wisely to really consider everything. For some reason, his eyes brightened and he just told me

that we could talk about it when I got back stateside. I wouldn't break up with him over Skype, and I think we have a lot of legalities to go through regarding the house and we have to collect any deposits that are available when we cancel the wedding things, because his mom didn't pay for any of the wedding she planned. Anyway, I've had a sit down with my father, he's been feeling better, which is a huge relief. He has offered me two-thirds of the cost of the house, so I could either buy it from Adam and pay off most of the mortgage, or just walk away and buy myself something else.

I didn't expect this, but he said it would give me options should I decide what he thinks I have decided. He says he just wants me to have freedom, and that he wouldn't want to see my heart and my bank account broken at the same time. So, that's that. Like I said, nothing really happened between Adam and I, I do have more power, though, thanks to my parents, and I have been enjoying my time with my family. My mom and I have been shopping a lot, and my brother, my dad's doctor, and his family have been coming over for dinner quite a bit. My sister is expected to return from China tomorrow, and I am very excited to see her. I wish you all a happy holidays and a hopeful new year. Hopefully, my next update will have a conclusion, one way, or another. Update 2, I think my

29F, future mother-in-law, 63F, may be trying to sabotage my relationship with my fiancé, 31M. Hi. I first would like to apologize for how long this update took. I've been completely swamped at work. and things have been happening at home too, so let's get into that. I want to thank everyone again for their continued support and interest in my relationship issues. Sincerely, the advice and shared experiences has made everything a lot clearer. Also, Adam has been following along. Firstly, I specifically want to thank everyone who defended and supported Adam. I don't see him as a bad guy, and I really wouldn't be vindictive,

so, passive-aggressive comments while leaving, or making rude comments to him. him or anything really mean-hearted, I couldn't. Due to him, he has supported me emotionally through getting my MBA. He helped me study for my L-SATs. He read over my essays to apply to law schools. He did mock interviews with me. He sat through boring orientations with me. He stayed up all night with me when I was sick with nerves before taking the bar. He was my cheerleader when I ran my first triathlon, and he is my champion when I see a house centipede. He is my dream man, and I would never give up my relationship with him if I didn't feel. Like I was fighting a losing battle.

Now, are you guys in for a real shocker? Someone made a comment in the update that he would be outside my parents' house if he really wanted it to work. He took your advice to heart, and he was outside with his bags and a rental on the evening of the 24th. I, uh, I was taken aback, and I blurted out what the fuck are you doing here? He just laughed and said he wanted to talk about everything and it couldn't wait until I got back, he'd been reading all the comments on the threads, and he felt like they were very

eye-opening. He browsed our slash raised by narcissists and felt very moved by the similarity some of the posters have with their parents. He said that he spent the last few days thinking about what went down at the restaurant with his mother, and how the look in my eyes when I looked at him after I realized what had happened broke his heart. What I didn't know was that he and his mother got into a row after I went to sit at the bar, fighting about me, and how he doesn't feel free, how his sister used to say she had the same problems but since she moved far away, it has died down a lot. A lot of people ask me why I put up with this for so long. I tried to remember when this really started happening, when it stopped appearing like regular

mother-in-law don't want to lose my son comments and began to feel like isolation and vehemence. We used to have an okay relationship when we first met, sometimes we'd go shopping together, and once we got our nails done, it was around when Adam and I purchased the house together. that's when it really started to get bad. The Windows incident was the first really big issue I remember, when she realized we were serious about each other. So, back to when we were at my parents' house, we had a serious heart to heart,

I bared everything to him, and he did the same. So, there was no extreme confession of incest or physical abuse. It was just that he thinks he was raised by a narcissist who saw her control of her son. He pried in joy, slipping away. We came to a decision. here is what we decided on December 27th. He went back to the U.S. after New Year's Day, a couple of days before me, and moved his stuff

out of our place to a friend's, he didn't want me to have to be inconvenienced for changes he had to make. We have put our engagement on hold for the time being. He cancelled all the plans his mother made. He has been seeing a therapist since the middle of January pretty consistently, twice to three times a week. I've been to four sessions with him. His mother has not. we have sort of begun dating each other again. I have been talking to his sister and the things their mother put her through, Adam is very lucky. Now, about his mother, he has decided to give her one last chance to go to therapy with him,

and he has stated that if she does not, he will be going no contact with her. We have a lot to rebuild, but I know we can do it together. Final update, I think my 29F future mother-in-law, 63F, may be trying to sabotage my relationship with my relationship with my mother-in-law. my fiancé, 31M. It has been a long time, our slash relationships, we're all a year older. Adam and I will be composing this thread together. Oh no, I gave away the ending. Yes, we are together, in fact, we're married. Here goes, last time we left off, Adam was seeing a shrink, still is, to try to unwind some of the damages mother did. We were living separately for the time being,

Adam's mother tried to commit suicide, but no really, she called emergency services before she tried and didn't even have time to swallow more than two pills. It's so scary to think that within his mind there was such an abusive past when he has always had such a happy exterior. My husband, man that's fun to say, was basically traumatized by his own mother his entire life, as was his sister. I had alluded before in one previous thread that Adam's sister had it a lot worse than Adam when they were younger, but when Adam's father died, his mom locked in on him. He was a So, Adam's dad died of kidney failure. However, Adam had donated one of his kidneys to try to save him. His father's body rejected the donation and passed away about 11 years ago this coming April.

His mother took it upon herself during his grieving process to manipulate him into believing he killed his own father and she was alone now because of him, that if he wanted to repair what he did to her, he'd treat her better every time he thought that he could get away and create his own life and feel free, she'd remind him, the windows, for a again. example, I only heard the part where she blamed me, but I tried to think back to the conversation and really tried to hear what Adam had said. It's about four years ago now, but he was telling me at that moment that the reason her house was falling down was because she no longer had a man to take care of it, because he killed his dad. He was trying to tell me, I just wasn't able to understand

what it meant. Same with the vacation to Barcelona, she was doing it in front of me now. When he was younger, a lot of these issues had been regarding academic success or athletic success. She didn't have any issue then with girlfriends or anything. She just viewed her children as extensions of herself. It was bad. It just wasn't this level of guilt-inducing insanity. Let's get back to the present day. Adam's psychologist had suggested Adam offer his mother a chance to come to therapy to work out issues. He wasn't able to propose this to her at the time because after her suicide attempt she whisked herself away on a cruise to get some much-needed R&R, whatever. Oh my God, you'd think he was asking her to murder puppies with the way she went on. So, that's that,

no contact, she has tried, but Adam has either ignored all phone calls with unknown numbers. We had our locks changed, and his work has strict instructions not to let her pass the doors. She moved to where Adam's sister lives in July, but I know that his sister, we are close. Has been no contact with her since she met her husband. We wrote off the 25,000. We either get it back in probate court, in inheritance, or not at all, I'm not really choked up about it, not enough to do any extra work to get it back right now, especially since Adam is worried she'll use it as leverage to buy back in. We ended up getting married in September, flew out to be with my parents this week to renew

our vows in their house, and we're going to have our honeymoon in Fiji come January. My dad isn't doing so well, but he always seems to fluctuate like that. However, my brother isn't optimistic this time, anyway, we were wondering, since you have all been so supportive, if you would do us one small favor, Adam and I are going to have a grieving ceremony for his father, so he can process it correctly without manipulation. For any of you who have lost parents, what helped you get through it? Thank you for everything. We wished we could have invited each and every one of you two. Our wedding, but that would be creepy. That's the end of the first story. Let's begin the second one. I hope you enjoy this story. I discovered my sibling attempting to wed my spouse and the surprising conclusion will stun you about how I sought retribution. I, a woman aged 30, have been united with Mark, an imposter. Name, 32M, for three years. We met in high school and reconnected several years later. Once we started dating, there was no looking back and here we are, married for three years and still going strong.

Not everyone was happy about our wedding, though, especially my older sister, Nina, 32F. We went to the same high school and Nina had a major crush on my husband back then but the feelings weren't mutual, as far as I know. In fact, he didn't even know that Nina had a thing for him which he told me several months into our relationship. Anyway, Nina didn't attend our wedding and neither has she spoken to me ever since I announced my engagement which was fine by me. She's never liked me, I don't know why. It's not your typical sibling rivalry where I'm the golden child and she's sidelined by me all the time

because our parents always treated us equally and it wasn't even as though I was better than her academically or in sports. Heck, we don't even look different so I literally never understood why she disliked me so much. I tried to be her friend growing up but would always end up getting pushed away so I just stopped and made my peace with the fact that my older sister just didn't like me and that was that. We weren't close so her not attending my wedding didn't make much of a difference to me at all. We only meet on the holidays or at family events, but even then she doesn't acknowledge me and neither do I talk to her because it's pretty pointless to try and befriend a person who hates

you for no reason. Our relatives are also well aware of our strained relationship, so there aren't many who question it either. It's just established that we don't cross each other's ways at all. But around half a year ago, she did cross me and it was just so pathetic. Six months back, my husband received a drunken phone call from Nina where she went on to speak at length about how he'd married the wrong sister and that she would be a much better wife for him than I was. She didn't know that she was on speaker and I was sitting right beside him, giggling through a rant. She eventually ended it by announcing that she was going to marry him one way or another and she'd even be willing to be his mistress if it came down to it. I was really surprised by

by that because it was so low. I'm going to be honest, I did think it was funny and pathetic, but I was also angry that she'd even dared to pull something like this even though I hadn't even done anything to her. So I decided that I'd had enough and if she was allowed to mess with me then so was I. I encouraged my husband to flirt with her and give her false hopes. It was cruel, but it was also much needed and well deserved. He told her to come over to our house so they could get married now and she agreed readily, sounding like she'd won the lottery. Marcus and I set up a hidden camera in our living room the next day and I personally decorated our room to look as dreamy as possible. Fit for a wedding. Then, I sat in the next room when she arrived

and watched the drama unfold. It was way too funny to watch her try and flirt with my husband while he just tried to be as stiff as possible and after a quick exchange of vows and rings, he told her to go away and keep this a secret until he told her that it was safe to tell people. He didn't even kiss her after the vows and even then, the idiot didn't seem to think that something was off. After the mock ceremony, Marcus and I ended up laughing at the video for around half an hour because of how delusional this woman seemed. It was just sad that she was ready to go so low just because she hated me and one of my husband.

Sucks for her that my husband doesn't love anyone other than me. We thought we'd send the video to my parents but decided that we'd wait for the right time. She would definitely try to pull some crap on us again and that's when we'd send this to them so that they realize what a trashy person she really is, who was willing to hit on someone else's husband just to get back at her sister. My parents treated us equally but they were also way too supportive of my sister even though she didn't deserve it. For instance, they'd paid for my sister's vacation to Spain a few months before I was supposed to get married because apparently she was very affected by this wedding and wanted some time away. I hated that they were falling for her victim

act but they were also paying for my wedding venue so I couldn't complain that they were being unfair, they really weren't. And then again, they let my sister stay with them when I was on my honeymoon because she was feeling lonely. I hated that she would try to use my marriage to her high school crush as a way to gain sympathy from our parents and they would fall for it again and again. I needed them to know that she was a terrible person and that they didn't have to sympathize with her anymore. So for that, if I had to do something sly and backhanded then I was ready to do that as well. I just didn't want my parents falling for my sister's act anymore. We had to wait for the right time to send it to my parents, though. Because I knew that if I told them we'd pulled this off just

because of a drunk phone call, they'd tell me that I was being just as bad as her and it would lead nowhere. So I had to wait for her to mess up somehow. A few days back, my sister finally publicly announced that she's been married to Marcus for half a year now, and even though they've been keeping it under wraps up until now, she's finally ready to own up to it. She also added that she was giving me one day to vacate the house and hand over all my jewelry since now. As Marcus's wife, she owned everything that once used to be mine. Marcus and I were at home that day in our inbox was instantly flooded with messages while our phones rang off the hook with nosy relatives asking about what was going on. After their fake wedding, Nina would often text Marcus and tell him,

that she loved him and would constantly ask about when exactly they'd announced their love to the world. Marcus would probably reply once a month and would always tell her that they'd do it when the time was right. The last time she'd texted was three weeks ago and I guess she just couldn't wait anymore. I was surprised that she'd actually gone ahead and done something so crazy but well, I knew this was bound to happen someday. She was always going to snap and do something insanely stupid and ridiculous and this was it. Marcus decided to call her up and even recorded the call so that I'd have more proof to show to my parents. Even on the phone call, she was pretty confident in spite of the fact that Marcus had immediately handed over his phone to me. For whatever

reason, she genuinely believed that she and Marcus were still actually married. She told me that begging her or pleading with her wasn't going to change the reality so I could just save my breath and instead, use my energy to think about what I would do now that I didn't have anything. It was so ridiculous that I actually ended up laughing in her face before I told her the truth about what had happened six months ago. Of course, she refused to believe me and told me to put her on the phone with her husband so I handed Marcus's phone and after that, he had to convince Nina for like ten minutes before she actually realized that she'd been played for a fool. I don't know why exactly she'd even fallen for any of this since there was no priest officiating the wedding,

no paperwork, and even her own so-called husband wasn't willing to speak to her more than once a month. I think anyone with even half a brain cell would have realized that this was all fake and she'd been screwed over if there were so many hints, but she's too delusional. Once she did realize, though, she totally snapped and started screaming at us about how we just ruined her reputation and life and that we were downright evil and immoral for doing this to her. She was even sobbing about how I destroyed her life, but I really think that it was she who did this to herself. She wanted my husband and my life so badly that she was willing to do anything for it. I really don't understand how that's my fault. Even after that, when I sent my parents the

wedding video and explained to them everything that had happened since they'd been getting a lot of calls regarding Nina's post and since they weren't too active on social media, they had no idea what was going on. So Marcus and I explained everything and came clean to them, hoping that they'd see that Nina was a terrible person and she was willing to wreck my home just so she could be with Marcus and steal my life from me. But the only thing that my parents cared about was the fact that I'd been a cruel person and my husband and I had played a nasty prank on Nina for absolutely no reason. They told me that they were truly embarrassed by the antics that their fully grown daughters were up to and even threatened to cut us both out of their well if we didn't grow the hell up and

issue a public apology to each other. I got into an argument with my parents over this because they just couldn't make me apologize to the woman who was trying to steal not only my husband, but also my husband from me. It was just not fair and yes. Maybe I'd been a bit too cruel and had taken things too far, but that didn't just magically make Nina's actions right. My parents are just stuck on the fact that what we did to Nina was messed up on a psychological level and instead of creating so much drama, we could have just blocked her after that phone call and made sure that we told them that day itself instead of waiting so long just so that Nina would inevitably end up creating a public spectacle of our family. They think that both of us are too self-involved

and believe that we need to introspect a little. My mother told me that Nina might be a jealous homewrecker, but I'm no less since what I'd done was actually psychotic and she couldn't believe that she'd raised two daughters who hated each other so much that they were willing to stoop to any level just for revenge even at our age. I'll admit that it really did sting. A lot. It's been two whole days and I still can't bring myself to forget that comment even though my husband thinks that my parents were way too harsh on us. I don't know what to think right now. I'd offer making a fool out of my sister for six months by making her believe that my husband

actually loved her back. Update 1. Hi, guys. I know I messed up. I do realize that now so everyone can ease up on the hatred. I'm a human being and I made a huge mistake. I get that now. What I did was cruel and unlawful. unnecessary, just to force my parents to cut my sister off. I didn't realize it back when I was

writing that post, but I guess I'd grown to hate her just as much as she hated me and didn't even realize it. Nothing justifies what I did since it caused someone an unbearable amount of shame and trauma. A few days after the whole fiasco, my parents got in touch with me and told me a lot of things that I didn't know about my sister and I just didn't know what to say anymore. I'm ashamed of myself right now and I wish I could go back in time to fix things. We should have just blocked her number that day and let it go. Mina is actually in rehab right now because while I wasn't aware of it, she had a crippling alcohol addiction and was struggling with that all along. I don't blame myself for the addiction, of course, but I do think that she relapsed because

of what I'd done. Six months ago, she'd relapsed once but my parents had managed to keep an eye on her for the next few months so that she wouldn't give in once more. But then, after Marcus and I told her the truth, she relapsed yet again. Even all the supposed vacations that my parents were sponsoring for her that I'd misunderstood were actually trips to rehab, but since my parents needed an explanation for her absence at certain events and holidays, they'd use vacations to cover it up. Nina and I had pretty much stopped speaking after she moved out for college, so I had no way to find out what she was going through. My parents told me that they do think they messed up by not telling me the real reason she'd be absent for so long and didn't realize that their lies

about where she was would backfire in such a way. They hadn't even considered the possibility that maybe even I'd feel jealous and try to get back at her, which is why this whole situation came to be in the first place. I really just don't understand what to do right now and feel so awfully guilty. Nina had behavioral problems all along growing up, but I'd never known that because my parents had never told me about any of it. They'd done their best to treat us like equals and I think they did their job well, too. But this was just a consequence of keeping us separate that they hadn't considered. And neither had we, to be very honest. Both of us had lost any compassion we had for each other and had forgotten that this person we hated so much was

also a human being. I really do regret whatever happened and I'm planning on paying her a visit as soon as I can so that I can at least apologize for whatever happened. There are still a lot of our relatives and extended family who are trying to gossip about what has happened and while under usual circumstances I would have grabbed this opportunity to talk crap about Nina, I'm obviously ignoring all those people now and only praying that nothing too serious happens to her since my parents told me that they'd found her passed out in her house which was a first.

All the other times that she's relapsed she's been able to approach them and ask for help, still conscious. When my parents didn't hear from her for two days after that post, they decided to go visit her and that's when they realized that she's relapsed yet again. I can't imagine how difficult it must have been for my parents to realize that my sister and I had fallen apart so badly that there was no hope of reconciliation. Ugh, I'm just so sorry about whatever has happened. I don't know what else to say.

I don't know why I'm saying it here either. But I feel like I have to put it out there in the universe so that somehow Nina can feel it. I'm truly sorry. Update 2, I finally visited Nina today. She was in really bad shape and it showed on her face. She's been in rehab for a few weeks now and she's slowly recovering but she wasn't in any state to meet people, least of all me, all these days. She'd finally agreed to see me and it was really weird and horrible for me to see her because she looked bad. Not ugly but bad, in a way that makes you feel like this person has been through something. It was very awkward for me to walk into that room and speak to her initially since we'd barely ever treated each other

like family once we reached adulthood, but now we had to put all that behind us or at least try so that we don't keep trying to one up each other and drive one another crazy in the process. So I apologized to her for whatever I'd done and admitted that it was just insane. I'd hated her so much that I'd literally pulled some soap opera-level stunt just to put her down and gaslight her which was pretty psychotic of me. She agreed and then apologized to me for trying to get with Marcus as well. She told me that she'd always been jealous of me right from when we were kids because once I was born, she felt like I would become her competition. It was all internalized, but it still manifested in her behavior and she just couldn't control it so she felt the need

to put me down and compete with me so that she could win. When Marcus agreed to marry her, she finally thought that she'd won but that wasn't the case. She said that she was finally done competing and even though this didn't mean that we were friends all of a sudden, but it was certainly a fresh start, to say the least. So that's what happened and I truly am grateful that I got a second chance. I would have hated myself forever if something awful had happened to Nina and would have forever blamed myself. I feel considerably better now. Update 3, hi, I just wanted to tell you guys that Marcus and I are still together obviously. That goes without saying. I don't know who suggested that Marcus and I had split just because I hadn't mentioned him in my

updates. He knows and is well aware of everything that's happened to Nina and he also apologized to her. She didn't want to meet him but she did say that she was over it now and realizes that Marcus was just trying to be a loyal and proactive husband and she isn't going to hold that against him. So that was that. He obviously felt really guilty about everything as well and was just as sorry as I was, if not more. I have no idea why people were bashing him for being complicit and not doing anything to fix things even though I hadn't even mentioned whether he had apologized or not. So I hope this clears that up and people stop calling us horrible names. We've apologized, and Nina forgives us. End of story, and for the people who are blaming my parents

and saying that they're responsible for this situation, I don't know why you think that's the case. My parents could have dealt with this better, for sure, but I think they were trying their best to handle everything with sensitivity and kindness. Them hiding my sister's alcoholism for me was probably in both our best interests. I hated her and she hated me so why would it even matter what the other was going through? Obviously, they didn't know what was going to happen in the future so I'm not going to blame them for hiding this piece of information from me. They did what they felt was right and honestly, I think it's fine. There's a lot of you guys who still think that my sister is the villain somehow and okay, maybe she is but so was I.

What I did was really messed up so if I get a second chance to fix our relationship and have a normal family for once then I'll take that without a question, even if it means forgiving thank you. Update 4 Hi, Everyone. It's been one whole year since I posted last and wow, this feels weird but I think I'm ready to share what's happened since then. A lot of you warned me that my sister would backstab me again or something. A lot of you said that I need to cut my parents out of my life.

And a lot of you thought that I was the only toxic element here and that they'd all be better off without me. I'm thankful that none of those things are true and we're all happy with our respective lives right now. My sister and I made a genuine effort after that to reconnect and build a relationship with each other because both of us were pretty tired of fighting with one another. It just wasn't worth it anymore, especially in our 30s when we had 100 things to worry about anyway. We just didn't want to spend more of our precious time and energy on something as petty as our rivalry anymore. So we would meet for coffee every once in a while, not too often but at least once in three months. We were also actually nice to each other at one of our cousins' weddings and that was quite the shock for the rest of our family.

Nina and I aren't the best of friends at all but we're trying to be friends. We're okay with each other now and that's what matters. I don't think we'll ever get to a point where we're very close but we're not going to actively try and hurt each other. other now, that's for sure. She's also moving a little farther away from home for a better job and while that does sort of seem risky given her predicament with regards to alcohol, my parents are going to handle that and if they ever need any help, Marcus, and I will always be there for her. It finally feels like I have a somewhat normal family and I'm really, really happy about it. I never thought that Nina and I would ever have any relationship

at all, let alone a good one but who knows? Maybe even that's going to happen someday so I'm glad that I didn't up and speaking of family, they're soon going to be in addition to mine. Marcus and I discovered that we were pregnant just a few weeks ago and everyone is thrilled. I'm a month and already and we announced it to our close friends and family on FaceTime a few days back. I face-timed my parents and sister in a group and when I told them the news, they seemed really thrilled. Yeah, Nina seemed genuinely happy when I told her and even sent me a bouquet of yellow roses

to congratulate me the next day. So life's been pretty great and I guess that's how it is when you're not constantly filled with hatred and anger. I'm looking forward to pregnancy and motherhood and I hope for the best.