Reddit Stories - INFORMED my partner that my canine COMPANION takes PRIORITY over them after they

Episode Date: July 10, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #relationships #pets #priorities #communication #conflictSummary: INFORMED my partner that my canine COMPANION takes PRIORITY over them after they expressed frustration. We discussed boundaries and expectations, reaching a compromise that respects both our needs.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, relationships, pets, priorities, communication, conflict, boundaries, compromise, respect, needs, partner, canine, companion, frustration, discussion, expectationsBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Inform my partner that my canine companion takes priority over them after they requested guests to come over and take my furry friend without informing me, despite my regular vacuuming and the dog being kept on the lower level. To help with his allergies. I, 23F, and my boyfriend, 25M, have been together for 2.5 years. We met on hinge and instantly connected and have been inseparable since. When we first started dating, I told him that I told him that I,

have a dog, his name is Theo, I got him in 2020 when he was a puppy. Theo is four now. My boyfriend is allergic to animal fur. When we first started talking slash dating I asked if it would be an issue. He said no, he is family members that he visits on holidays who have pets, so he just takes an over-the-counter allergy med, and that seems to do the trick for him. So, whenever he would come over to my place he would take his allergy med. He wouldn't interact with Theo much, like petting him, playing with him, and letting him be near him much in general. I would also make sure Theo would leave my boyfriend alone and give the space that he needs so he doesn't have a bad reaction even with the allergy med.

I would also make sure to clean the house to limit the amount of dog fur around before he would come over. Everything was perfect and we had a good system. If I would go over to his place I would make sure to put on clothes that were clean and had no dog fur on them so I wouldn't be leaving slash tracking it into his house. About six months ago my boyfriend and I decided to get our own place together, so we rented a condo that was pet friendly, because wherever I go Theo comes with me. My boyfriend and I thoroughly communicated about what that would look like with his allergy. One being that he should get an allergy medication from his doctor rather than an over-the-counter med. So, that it would be stronger and help him out more.

Our condo has two stories so we put a dog gate up so Theo doesn't have access to the upstairs where our bedroom and bathroom are. I also vacuum every other day to limit the amount of fur and keep it controlled. I also give Theo baths about once every week and a half and brush him nearly every day. So far for the past six months this has really worked. We have this system so Theo can have access to the entire main floor and he's not just cooped up in a cage or separate room all the time. I know I do a lot of work to keep my boyfriend's allergies down, but he helps out around the condo a lot too. Household chores-wise, we have things pretty balanced. But recently for the past month my boyfriend has brought up multiple times that he doesn't know how much longer he can handle having Theo here.

Yes, we have a good system, and yes, his allergy medication works well, which I bring up every time he mentions it. I try to understand what issues he is having and all he says is that he doesn't like having to come. constantly be worried about his allergies and Theo being around. He has expressed to me that he feels trapped in his own house having to constantly worry. I try seeing his side of it all, but I also mentioned to him that from the beginning he knew that Theo and I are a package deal, that we would have to work through this together. Everything seemed to be perfect till out of the blue my boyfriend seemed to completely flip on things. He does love Theo and loves going on walks with him and interacting with him for just a few minutes before he has to stop, and he has expressed this.

We've had this conversation multiple times and it always comes to the conclusion of both of us not really seeing eye to eye. It got to a point where he would get home from work, we would eat dinner, then he goes right upstairs to get away from Theo. He seemed to form a hatred towards him. Now when I try to have a conversation with him about it, he just shuts it down and won't talk to me about it. Two weeks ago when he got home from work, I had dinner ready and he didn't even say hi to me or eat, just went right upstairs. Again when I tired to talk to him, he shut me down. About a week ago, that's when things took a turn for the worst. My boyfriend said that one of his friends, Mike and his girlfriend, Sarah, would be coming over

for dinner and to hang out last weekend. I worked from home so I was able to spend the afternoon cleaning the condo, cooking appetizers and the meal, and prepare some mixed drinks. I was excited to see them because I haven't seen Mike in a while and I haven't met Sarah yet. Usually when we have guest over I will put Theo in a separate room so he's not in the way and disturbs our guests too much. But, my boyfriend told me I don't have to do that for them, they love dogs. When Mike and Sarah come over I instantly notice the vibes are a little off. They seem to be paying more attention to Theo, to get to know Theo more than spend time with my boyfriend and I. We eat dinner, we talk, hang out, and have a nice time. Once dinner is over I start cleaning up and Sarah offers to help me while

the guys grab a beer and go sit on the couch. Sarah and I get to chatting and I tell her how much I love her presence and her and Mike seem like an amazing couple. She then replies with yeah we've been taking some big steps together, we're getting an apartment and Theo seems like he would fit well into our lives. He really is a great dog. I'm taking a back and excuse myself and ask my boyfriend if we could talk. Him and I go upstairs and I tell him what Sarah said to me. He admits he invited the two of them over so they could possibly adopt Theo. He did this all behind my back and I had no idea this was his intention. I instantly snap at him and yell Theo comes before you. He is my priority, I take care of him and the house to help you.

If you can't be grateful for that effort, I don't know if I can continue with you. He's comes before you. I then go downstairs and ask Mike and Sarah to leave. I am enraged. I then pack a bag for Theo and I and we are now staying at my parents until further notice. I don't know if I can forgive my boyfriend for this. I can't trust him to be alone with Theo anymore. My boyfriend has been texting and calling me asking if we can talk this out,

but I'm just too mad to say anything to him. Is it worth flushing two and a half years down the drain because he tried to sell my dog? So, Ada for telling my boyfriend my dog comes before him. I also just want to say hi Morgan, Justin, Lauren, Jerry, and any other special guests Morgan may have on the podcast. Update, April 11, 2025. I just want to start out this post by saying thank you to everyone who commented on my original post. You all really helped me out and put things into perspective for me. Felt like I was able to sort out my thoughts more. Okay, so update time. My boyfriend and I are not longer together. He broke my trust and betrayed me, can never recover from that. I want to clarify a few things I got comments on in my original post. Yes, my ex did have

allergies. I went to a few of his doctor's appointments so I could ask his doctor on other ways I could help stop his allergies from getting heightened at home. I would also sometimes pick up his prescription for him at the pharmacy. Both his doctor and I recommend he goes to see an allergist for possibly better medication and allergy shots, but he said the medication he had was working enough. So, that's on him. One other thing. My boyfriend was 100% on board with moving in together. We communicate about everything and what it would look like living with Theo. I also did my best to accommodate for both Theo and my ex wanted everyone to be happy. Now on to the big stuff. The night I left and packed a bag for both Theo and I to stay at my

parents my ex called and texted me all night long asking to talk and short everything out together. I ignored him, I wasn't in the headspace to talk. Plus where was all this wanting to talk in communication when he started having issues living with Theo. A few days later my parents and I went to go get the rest of my things from the condo while he was at work so there would be no confrontation with him, I wasn't ready for that. Side note, my parents are letting Theo and I stay with them until I'm able to get back on my feet and find my own place. I'm very thankful for that. I haven't blocked my ex yet because I'm working on breaking myself out of the lease, so I still need to be in some contact with him for

that to work it out. I'm willing to pay whatever fees I need to for that. Every time I have had to contact him for breaking the lease, he had asked me if we could talk. I tell him no every time because I honestly don't want to hear what he has to say or whatever excuses he tries to give. He crossed a huge line. Now on to Mike and Sarah. I just want to say they are both amazing people. The night when they both came over, they had no idea what they were getting into. They both were under the assumption I was on board with rehoming Theo, because that's what my ex told them. After I asked them to leave and I left as well. I texted Mike letting him know what happened. I also didn't have Sarah's number at that time because this was my first time meeting her. Mike then texted my

ex that night going off on him saying they could no longer be friends. Mike and Sarah had been dating for eight months before I met her. I have no Mike since high school. We weren't really friends or that close. But, I knew him enough to know that he is a very good person. My ex and Mike were friends from collage. My ex didn't go to the same school as us growing up. So, occasionally my ex, and I would all go out together or he would come over for a boy's night. Mike had already met Theo from coming over occasionally. So that's probably why my ex contacted Mike about adopting Theo. Mike, Sarah, and I went to dinner Wednesday night to talk everything over and be on the same page. They explained to me that they both thought I was okay with rehoming Theo because

of what my ex said to them. My ex told them that I was getting rid of Theo to help out my ex with his allergies because they were too much to deal with, and that we would be more comfortable giving Theo to people we know and trust. I was shocked to say the least hearing all of this. They also explained that they both felt disgust being put into a situation like that and also feeling completely betrayed by my ex and the manipulation he put us all through. They both have turned into some pretty amazing friends and they told me they have my back no matter what.

I think the three of us hanging out will turn into a regular thing. I was planning to post the update last night after I got home from dinner. But, can you guess who showed up at my parents' house last night? You guessed it, my ex. He knocked on the door and my dad answered. My ex asked if I was available to talk. So my dad asked if I wanted to talk to him or if he should tell him off. I decided it was probably time to at least hear him out, even though I was still standing my ground.

He apologized and said he made a huge mistake. He didn't think I would have left. I asked him what did you expect. You went behind my back to try to get rid of my family. You manipulated everyone in that situation. I wouldn't be able to ever trust you again. You deserved what came to you from this. Losing your friends and me.

Your mask slipped and you showed me who you truly are. If you would have actually communicated how you were feeling with me, things could have been different. We might have broken up, but at least it would have been a conversation. instead of this. How I can trust you won't try to get rid of Theo again, or manipulate me again, or try to control even bigger things that could come. You should be sorry to me, Mike, and Sarah. But most importantly you should feel sorry to yourself because you fucked up big time. I'm done with this conversation, you can leave now. He then asked me if he could see Theo, I laughed in his face and closed the door. I do believe he cared about me up until he decided to make this

decision. But he just gave up and that's on him. I have learned a huge lesson here and even more red flags to pay attention to. I have promised both Theo and I that I will never put us in a situation like that again. Pet allergies will be an instant no. Theo has gotten all the love he deserves since moving back home with my parents. He is definitely a spoiled boy. I feel bad putting him in a situation like this. The situation sucked, but I'm glad it panned out the way it did and I was able to intervene before something horrible happened. I want to say thank you again to everyone for the support. I really love the Reddit community. Next story, fiancé pretended to leave me and told everyone I was abusing her as a prank to set up a surprise birthday party,

then blocked me when it spiraled out of control on social media. I honestly don't know what happened. A couple of days ago, my girlfriend who I lived with left our apartment while I was at work, claimed to her family and mutual friends that I'd been physically abusing her and blocked me on everything. I have no idea what's going on. There weren't any major problems in our relationship that I could see, and we just had consensual sex last night. The very last time I spoke to her before all of this happened, she was perfectly fine, kissed me goodbye before I went to work, and everything was normal. Then I got a call from my dad toward the end of the day asking me calmly if I'd been hitting my girlfriend. I didn't know what he was talking about, and then she told me.

I rushed home, and she had gotten all of her stuff and is staying either with her family, or a friend of hers. My Facebook account is blowing up, and I have no idea what to do. None of what is being said is true, and I don't know if someone is just playing a cruel joke on me. A few people even mentioned that the police were called, but I haven't heard anything as of yet. The last major argument we had was probably in February around Valentine's Day. We were going through some financial trouble, the stress got to us, and we were both getting upset with each other over petty, household things.

She was my best friend, the person I could rely on to be there for me, and the person I would be there for always, no matter what. We were definitely planning on getting married. It wasn't a matter of if, it was a matter of when. Her family had basically accepted me into the family. I was close with both her mom and her dad. I only called them both once each. Neither of them answered my calls. I called my, I don't know, X? Just twice. No answer. She blocked me on every social media platform of hers that I know of. I asked a couple of friends, but they are being distant with me, just one word answers, or ghosting me. What the fuck is happening here? We'd always been up front and honest with each other, and our communication was stellar.

Update 1, okay, so this is going to be a weird-ass update. I'm sorry if you guys thought this was going to be anything interesting. A friend came forward and told me that apparently my dumb-ass fiancé decided to play a prank on me. She had the bright idea of leaving the house for a couple of days to set up a surprise birthday party for me set for this weekend. I don't know what the fuck she was thinking, nor do I even really know the full story yet. She is not really the prank playing type and I guess thought this would be hilarious or something. It looks like a majority of those friends who were acting distant were in on it. After I started being up front and honest with showing people my texts with her as this sub suggested, one of them told her that this wasn't

cool, and that if she didn't come clean, then he would. Well, she didn't come clean, and he came forward. I guess that's why nobody was answering their texts. Anyway, I texted her and I told her that I knew, asked her what the fuck she was thinking. She started blowing my phone up apologizing. She said her prank just went too far and spiraled out of control when it got to social media, and that she didn't know how to come clean when she realized that it crossed a line. She also said, that she didn't mean to let it come out that I was abusing her, and that she just wanted to make it seem like she left me, and that the abuse stuff was a rumor started by some other people who weren't in on her joke. I just didn't really respond to her. I left and went to my parents'

house before she got back home. My family now thinks she's a fucking moron, so her relationship with them is ruined right before our marriage, so that's great. Our mutual friends are now split in half with half of them thinking she's an idiot, and the other half feeling God knows what about the situation? I'm frankly embarrassed, and feel stupid for wasting everyone's time and dragging them into my relationship with my fiancé. I don't really know where to go from here. I don't know if I should call off the wedding, or postpone it and try to work out what the hell went through her mind. I'm sorry if this isn't the ending to the story you were all hoping for. I'm having drinks and will be here all night feeling sorry for myself and answering comments for as long

as I'm awake with this Jameson. Update 2. So firstly, thanks for all of your input. I read and considered every single reply. First I'll update you, then I'll tie up some loose ends from the comments in the previous post. I want to apologize for the bluntness of this post ahead of time, because despite your comments about me being calm and level-headed, I'm actually quite upset about the entire situation. And I feel like me sitting and thinking about it is only marinating this anger and making it more juicy and flavorful. On to the update, I spoke to her in person after I posted my update. From her perspective, her original idea was to make it look like she just got mad or something,

grabbed a few things, and left to her friend's house, where she was going to have the party thrown. Her friend has a really nice house that's perfect for a 20 to 30-person get-together. She was with her two friends and made an off-the-cuff remark when her friend said, what are you going to say when he asks why? And she said, I don't know, I'll probably tell him that I feel like he got too serious when we had sex, or something like that. Then her other friend who was with her immediately took it to social media without the other two girls knowing. And then when they checked their phones later on that day, it was already a dumpster fire. I said great, all that is understandable. Just one question, why did you then block me and then refuse to answer my calls,

because that seemed pretty fucking intentional to me. She said because she didn't want to throw her idiot friend under the bus and thought it would all go away if she just threw the party, and she hadn't realized how far it all went so quickly. I thanked her for telling me, and then I called off the wedding entirely. She cried, I cried, it was a goddamn mess. She asked where we go from here. I told her I don't know.

I don't even know if the relationship is over yet, but I know that the engagement is over, and that if I decide to give it another chance, at the bare minimum, we need to build my trust for her from the ground up, if not the entire relationship. And now I have to decide if I want that. Do I want to spend another four years being undecided? If I'm being honest with myself, I imagine it taking another couple of years before I can trust her again. Do I want to get married and start thinking about having children at 35? 35. 36. Close to 40. I told her that I have a lot to think about. I spoke to her dad last night. We shared a case of beers and had a conversation that lasted about five hours. My ex hasn't spoken

to anyone, and has basically been locked up in her old bedroom for now. She's been crying a lot. I do believe that she's genuinely remorseful about all of this, which complicates things. Her dad caught wind of the situation on Facebook but learned what was really going on maybe like an hour later. He'd gotten my calls, but hadn't returned them because he called his daughter first. She told him, and he just didn't know what to say to her. He told me that she's not truly stupid, but that she has a history of sometimes not thinking about things before she says them, and the impact her offhand remarks can have. He said this is the worst it's ever snowballed, but she's had situations in the past where she says something stupid or insulting, and doesn't realize the

impact of what she said until hours later when the other person blows up over it. So that's it. I still have a lot to think about. I know a lot of you guys are telling me that I have no balls for not literally tossing her out into traffic and laughing about it or something weird like that, but you have to understand that I still love her and have loved her for a few years now. Right now, I'm leaning toward moving on, but you're going to have to empathize with me here. As for my reputation, nobody thinks I'm an abuser. It's firmly out there now. Her reputation took a much more significant and lasting hit.

I haven't lost any friends, except for the idiot social media girl, whose reputation also took a severe hit. Nobody called the cops, all the other posts about it have been deleted, everything is good. There's no real need for me to get a lawyer and sue anybody. My family agrees with a lot of you. They're two seconds away from slapping me upside me head for not immediately kicking her to the curb. Just give me some time. I'm not going to make another update post, because I've already wasted too much of your time with this bullshit.

But maybe I'll just update this post in a few days after I've decided what to do. Forward slash forward slash.