Reddit Stories - My FATHER'S second wife COMPELLED him to enroll me in a RESIDENTIAL school

Episode Date: November 19, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #familydrama #stepmomissues #residentialschool #parentingwoes #familyconflictSummary: My FATHER'S second wife COMPELLED him to enroll me in a RESIDENTIAL school, causing turmoil in our family dynamic. The decision led to emotional distress and strained relationships, highlighting the challenges of blended families and conflicting parental priorities.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, familydrama, stepmomissues, residentialschool, parentingwoes, familyconflict, blendedfamily, parentalpriorities, emotionaldistress, familyrelationships, familydynamics, familystruggles, familyissues, stepmother, fatherdaughterrelationship, familydecisionsBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. My father's second wife compelled him to enroll me in a residential school when I was 10 so she could begin anew with her own children. Now, eight years later, he unexpectedly wishes for my return. Home even though his wife still hates me and tells my siblings not to talk to me. Okay. So I've been attending boarding school since I was 10. I started the fifth grade at my boarding school.

The reason why I started going so early is that my dad remembered. married, my mother cailed herself when I was a baby, to my stepmom when I was nine. When she got pregnant with my brother, she insisted that I be sent to boarding school so that they could start start afresh. I use quotes because I used to hear them talking about it when I still live there, I actually heard the discussions they'd have at night about it when they thought I was sleeping. She said a lot of hurtful things then, about me potentially being like my mother and potentially being a bad influence on their future children, but I guess she convinced him because he gave in, and they sent me away. So I went to boarding school, they had my brother and then my sister,

and I only see them in the summers and some holidays. In fact, a lot of holidays I spend with my friends' families, which my father has always signed off on. This especially confuses me considering his change of heart this summer. I mean, I've spent the last four Thanksgiving's holidays in other people's houses without comment. At first I was extremely depressed. I was really attached to my father as a kid and it took me a long time to deal with being sent away, especially when my siblings were born. I felt a lot of betrayal and resentment. But then I grew to deal with it. What really helped, and still helps, is that I have a wonderful group of friends at school and the adults there are really supportive there. My closest two friends have been there

since I've been there. I feel like they're my family. Also, a lot of the kids I go to school with deal with what I'm dealing with in some form or the other, and this has given my a lot of perspective. Additionally, and I am really grateful for this and understand that in a lot of ways I've been given an amazing opportunity and have nothing to complain about in this respect, I go to a really nice school. I love the grounds, I love my classes, I love the extracurriculars, I love my teachers, and I love my friends. The picture people paint of boarding school isn't the one that I experience. It's pretty easy for me to say that I prefer being at school 100x more than I prefer being at my father and stepmom's home. When I'm in their home, I feel like an

outsider. They do their thing and I do mine. It's especially awful though because I still get the sense that my stepmother doesn't want me around when I'm here. She barely acknowledges me and I know she influences my brother and sister not to interact with me. I know because I took them to a theme park two weeks back and they told me this after a full day of having fun with each other. So, and as much as I appreciate that I get to have the experiences I do at school, I can't seem to distance myself from my distaste of my father and stepmom. So, in order to avoid being disrespectful or coming off as rude, I just try to minimize the time I spend with them when I'm in their home for the summer. I don't have any friends here, so this means I go on hikes, go on runs, go to the movies,

whatever I can to just be active or out and about without getting into trouble, which brings me to the problem. My father kind of blindsided me yesterday. He sat down with me while I was eating breakfast, which never happens, before going on a hike and he told me he's concerned that I haven't wanted to spend time with the family. I was confused because I haven't ever perceived this need from him, nor any space for it. He works all year round and all day. My stepmother is always ferrying my brother and sister to something or off with her friends, I just didn't even think that they wanted that. He then said that he wants to keep me here for my final two years of high school and enroll me in the nearby private school so that I can be with the family. And I just

panicked. I get stellar grades and I'm doing well at school. Every report he's gotten has been good. I expressed this to him, but I was so distraught at the idea of not going back that the insisted my distress was an indication of how unattached from the family I was. I know I could have handled it better, but I blew up at him after he said this. I told him he was the reason I wasn't attached to family and that removing me from school would only remove me from the one place I had any real family. This really made him angry and he left saying he was resolved to remove me. I don't know what to do. How can I convince him to let me go back? I feel like I'm a kid again. It's the same feeling all over again and I'm so angry comments where O.P. has replied. Comment one, I suspect that once your

stepmother learns what your father has said that she will convince him to change his mind. Comment two, the stepmother might actually be a good last resort strategy here. If you try the letter writing or having a friend's parent slash a teacher talk to your father and he doesn't change his mind, then you've got nothing to lose in trying to enlist your stepmother to convince him. For her own selfish reasons, it sounds like she would agree you should go back to the school and she is probably the person most likely to influence your father. Oh, O. P. Oh God, I really hope so. Comment three, you need to be honest with him. He'll be shocked and deny it, but if you're honest, he'll understand. You need to tell him you

heard when you attend the reason you were shipped to boarding school is so that his family could start afresh. At the time you resented it, being displaced, but you found what you were missing at home, acceptance. You are now thriving at school with friends who willingly and wanting have you over for Thanksgiving. You don't feel the same at his house. You feel like an intruder, not a true member of the family. Even your brother and sister admitted that your stepmother instructed them to treat you this way. Then you drop the truth bombshell. You will always resent him for picking his new family over you, but you will resent him even more if he displaces you from the only place where you felt welcome. This conversation will not be easy, so feel free to write it as a letter

instead. You are 15, you don't get to call the shots, but you're old enough to demand your opinions be heard. Your father is an absentee parent. He needs to learn the truth. OOP, I really like the idea of writing a letter. I'm going to clear my head and get started on writing it so I can deliver it to him as soon as possible. I really appreciate this feedback. Thanks. When asked if the reason the father wants OOP closer to home at a local school is for financial reasons I'm not sure. It doesn't appear as if there are money problems. I know that my tuition is very expensive, but based off the family's lifestyle, it seems like nothing. I don't know if I'm being naive with this assumption, though. I don't want to be too detailed for the sake of

anonymity, but I know he works in a field and for a company that makes what a lot of people consider problematic amounts of money. I don't know if anything has changed for him. It's just never a thing he's discussed with me and I've never asked him about his money. Update one, I've been silent since the first few responses because I wanted to process all the suggestions coming my way. First, thank you so much for your concern and kindness. It really helped me sit down and think more calmly about this situation. Second, I decided to write an email to my father, in which I apologized for my outburst, expressed my understanding that we should develop a better relationship and my want for one as well. I don't know if I really want this TBAH, but based on

feedback, it seems smart to include this, and my belief that pulling me out of my school would not result in that goal. I offered alternatives, like FaceTiming regularly and more consistent visits during the holidays, like Thanksgiving. I also suggested that maybe we should do something together during this holiday so that we could talk and catch up. We used to hike a lot together when I was a kid and I suggested that we go on one together, like this weekend. I also explained that I feel I've been a responsible and productive student at the boarding school, pointing out that I head the Diversity Club, have provided peer tutoring each year since eighth grade, and have maintained a good GPA, and that disrupting my schooling might be counterproductive. I explained that my outburst was due to

these details, rather than my not wanting to be closer to him. I closed out saying I know he wants what's best for me, I hope this is true and I'll choose to believe it, and I want to work with him to make that happen. So now I'm waiting for his reply. I'm pretty anxious because I honestly don't know how he'll reply. I'm taking advice given to me here, though, and trying to make plans in my mind for any response. I haven't told any of my friends yet because I know they'll tell their parents, who may contact him, and I can't be sure how he'll react to that. If he refuses after my email, maybe I'll try to have an adult intervene. I'm still thinking it through. Anyway, thank you guys again. It's nice to know there are nice people all over.

Update 2, he responded. Up, when we spoke I told you I had made my decision. That stance has not changed and I am disappointed that you have chosen to ignore my words. Do not forget that you are still a child under my care, despite what you may feel. One day you will see the wisdom in this and be thankful. I am currently on May My Out on business and will be back on Saturday. Until I return and am able to speak in person, I do not want to hear or read another word about this issue. I want to contact my headmaster and dorm parent. I have good relationships with them, but now I really feel if they contact him that will be the end of it. I think I fucked this up. I shouldn't have sent that email, I should have waited. I don't know. My friend's parents are all

pretty influential slash well known in my dad and stepmom's social circle and I'm worried it will humiliate my dad slash stepmom if they find out about this issue or try to intervene. I feel does so paralyzed. Update 3, I'm going back to school. A lot has happened in a short period of time. I don't think I dealt with my father's email in the smartest way, but it worked. Advice telling me to speak to my stepmom really stuck with me. I felt so desperate that I spoke to my stepmom about the situation. It became very obvious very quickly that she had no clue that my father had wanted this. She immediately left the room after I explained the situation. I could hear her arguing with him saying it was a deal breaker and that she wouldn't have it.

He called me soon after she hung up and sounded so very angry. He said it was clear I had made up my mind and didn't want to be part of the family. He said that he had wanted time to let my stepmother know and wishes I had trusted him. I didn't even know how to start explaining why I feel his view of my feelings are so wrong before he told me that since I didn't even want to try working with him, he's sending me back. He ended the call saying, I hope you can deal with the consequences of your choices. I'm angry at him because I feel like so much of this is miscommunication on his part, but I'm happy more than anything because I get to go back. Thank God. I'm going to lay low, be as nice to everyone as possible, and try to ride this out until

school starts, which is soon. I'm so relieved. Next story, best friend used her work computer to look up my private health insurance information without permission and send a photo through messages to her controlling boyfriend, so I blocked her for the HIPAA violation. I, 23F, blocked my longtime friend Alice, 23F, of 10 years after she used her work computer to look up my health insurance information without my consent. The worst part is she took a photo of it, sent it through messages which her boyfriend of one year has access to. Some context, from my POV, her boyfriend is leaching off of her.

She spent thousands of dollars on dates, including a motorcycle that was impounded by police because he didn't bother getting his license or permit. He has used her credit card to buy drugs, has driven her car while intoxicated, and uses everything she owns, including her laptop that he uses to read all of her private conversations. I fear he is isolating her from everyone around her

and it's working. When I saw the photo, she laughed it off, and I was scared but pissed. I asked her why she would do that and she said she was just curious. I asked her how stupid she could be, not knowing what Hippa was if she works at a doctor's clinic. She never responded and left me on Reed, I assumed to run to our other friend Bella. No real apology or accountability. After two weeks, I blocked her. I confided in Bella and Cassie about the situation. Cassie was incredibly understanding, not understanding what possessed Alice to do this. Bella, on the other hand, loves to play devil's advocate and has always had animosity towards me. Bella said that Alice only had good intentions and that she was only being playful and trying

to connect with me as a friend. I found BS and explained that if Alice wanted to connect with me, she could have been an adult and communicated with me, asking for permission before risking her job, committing a HIPAA violation and possibly leaking my information. I told Bella, what if my SSN was on there? What if Alice's boyfriend saw it as an opportunity to take credit cards out of my name? Days pass, Bella wants to hang out. I agree, but informed her that I had blocked Alice and that we were no longer friends. I told her that she and Cassie were welcome to stay friends with Alice, but that I want to hang

out separately. Bella leaves me on Reed and doesn't reply for days. When she does, she responds along the lines of, I'm sorry that I hurt you but that if you didn't want my opinion, you should have said so and next time, I'll keep it to myself. It's clear we both have very different opinions about things. IDK, it felt like she was pushing the blame back to me instead of taking accountability. This week, Cassie and I were supposed to hang out. She flaked the first day, claiming she took an extra shift but then ghosted me completely

the second time. After a few days, she apologized and asked if I'm free this weekend. I said, Depends, have you heard from Bella? She replied, yeah, I went out with her yesterday, why? Did you want to do something with all of us together? I realized that Bella, who mentioned in her apology text that Cassie mentioned a jewelry stand and that we should all go, had gone with Cassie to that same stand the day Cassie and I were supposed to hang out. After Bella dropped Cassie off, she texted me with the apology message. I've been trying to spend time with both only to be ghosted and left behind. I feel like they use the opportunity to discuss things behind my back. Now, I feel like I'm being iced out. I'm starting to feel like they're planning some

intervention slash ambush to get me to forgive Alice. The trust is gone and I feel hurt. I've tried being honest and setting boundaries, but now I'm wondering if I'm being excluded for standing up for myself. Now I'm wondering, Ida for blocking Alice over this? And Wipta if I distanced myself from Bella and Cassie too? Any thoughts? Update, I apologize for taking so long, but I have an update. Also sorry in advance for the long post. There were a lot of questions, so here's some clarification. Update will be down below. Why did she look up my information and take a photo? I've been dealing with health issues that are progressively getting worse and I have no answers and had no decent

doctor. I think she took it upon herself to try and help by looking up my health insurance information. When asked why, she texted she was curious. I know she had good intentions, but I never gave her permission to look up my info or take a photo. If Alice had just asked me, I would have said no since I didn't want her jeopardizing her job. But also, if she would have only asked me, I would have let her know that I had already found a new doctor. Who did she send the photo to? As far as I know, just me. But her boyfriend uses her laptop and basically everything she owns. I believe he's read our conversations, which I had no clue until he brought up my health concerns that I confided in Alice and has also sent me a few messages not clarifying

it was him. So there was a very real possibility he saw the photo. More info, my SSN was not in the photo. I only said, what if it was? If it was, it would have been more serious. My name, address, birthday, and health insurance information was on there. Now for the update, after posting, I filed an official HIPAA complaint through the OCR website after many comments suggested it. I also reflected on this friend group and realized we had all been drifting apart for some time now, even before the incident, Alice and I were growing apart. Bella started showing more signs of animosity and resentment here and there. But Cassie?

We were actually growing closer so when she started ghosting me, I was left hurt and confused. Later, Bella sent me a text inviting me to a group hangout with some of her friends, including Cassie but not Alice. I assumed this was an intervention disguised as a hangout to maybe mend things between Alice, but I can't be for certain. I replied that while I appreciated the thought, I was not comfortable hanging out, and did not like how some things were handled or said, especially since Bella tried shifting the blame to me when she texted me an apology beforehand. I also said that I needed space

to re-evaluate some things, but I told her to have fun and to stay safe. She replied, wishing me the best, but if I needed anything she was going to be waiting for me while respecting my need for space. I haven't reached out since, but I've been thinking about it. Weeks passed and I was still stuck up on the situation. My sill got tired and finally asked me why I couldn't let it go. After taking some time to reflect on the reasons and my choices, I put my big girl pants on and made the decision to call. I called, got connected to the manager and explained what happened. I offered to email the screenshots and because of the small size of the clinic, they had to create a completely new email so I could

send everything. The next day, I received an email explaining that the clinic would be starting their investigation days earlier than they initially said. Days passed, and I received a conclusion email giving me their thanks for having the courage to report on what they did. They put Alice on leave and reviewed the logs for several days. They brought her in for an HR meeting and decided on training Alice with some HIPAA training and are putting in measures so that this will never happen again. I'm sure this is not the update many expected or hoped for. I did what many recommended but the decision was ultimately up to the clinic. I hope this was a wake-up call for Alice. I haven't heard anything from Alice, Bella, and Cassie since. My thoughts are that

Alice made a stupid and careless mistake that nearly costed her job and ended our friendship. She's always had the habit of making careless mistakes without thinking or caring about the consequences until they came. As for her boyfriend, I don't know him that well but I've seen red flags he's presented in person and from what Alice has told me. For why I didn't tell her, she's the type to not listen slash make excuses about her relationship. Besides, I wouldn't be the first friend to drop her because of her behavior once she started dating her boyfriend. I also want to briefly say that when writing my original post, it was 4 a.m. and I was shaking with anxiety at the realization that I just lost my closest friends of a decade. I regret how messy

it sounded with more gossip and ranting than actual facts of what happened and I apologize for that. I hope that this update shows that I actually took time to process things and approach it with more maturity than my first one. Thank you everyone who responded to my original post with advice, support, and even criticism. I think the blunt comments calling me a doormat were the most helpful in helping me reflect about everything. I know it took me some time, but in the end, I called and got some closure. I think this whole situation pushed me to improve myself for the better, not just as a person but to be a better friend to the future friends I'll meet. Thanks for reading, and at this moment, it will probably be my

only update unless something significant happens. Comment where OP has replied, comment, you did right by reporting the HIPAA violation. You were also right in realizing your friends were really no longer real friends anymore. You're at an age where big life changes happen and old friends often go by the wayside as we come to find others that are more closely aligned with where we see ourselves in the big scheme of things. You'll be fine. Keep the good memories and just let those women go their own ways. Oh, O.P., thank you for this.

It was hard since I knew them for so long, but I saw the signs, but didn't want to admit it to myself that we were all growing apart.