Reddit Stories - My FATHER'S wife became EXTREMELY ATTACHED after he passed, as if she covertly

Episode Date: November 4, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #relationships #familydrama #grief #attachmentissues #widowSummary: My FATHER'S wife became EXTREMELY ATTACHED after he passed, as if she covertly struggled with her loss and sought comfort in holding onto his memory through possessiveness and dependency.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, relationships, familydrama, grief, attachmentissues, widow, loss, comfort, possessiveness, dependency, coping, emotionalbond, mourning, support, healing, psychologicalimpactBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. My father's wife became extremely attached after he passed, as if she covertly took my home access tool and had a visible breakdown at my relatives' infant celebration when I modified it. Locks. So I had to block her and get security cameras. I'm a 27-year-old woman, and my family situation has gotten weird since my dad passed away. For context, I lost my mother when I was two years old, so I was raised by my dad all my life.

When I was 15, my dad remarried Marie, who came into our home with her daughter Nancy. I was never super close with either of them. We were civil but not tight. I left for college when I was 18 and pretty much stayed away except for holidays, so we never built that mother-daughter bond. Marie mostly focused on her own kid, and I focused on surviving high school and then moving out. We were basically cordial roommates for those few years under one roof. Fast forward, three years ago, my dad died suddenly of cardiac arrest. It was devastating. At first, in the immediate aftermath, I found myself leaning on Marie and she leaned on me. Grief can do that, I guess. We had this brief period of mutual support, planning the funeral

together, sharing some memories of dad, and crying over dinner. I thought maybe we might finally become close in a genuine way. But pretty soon after the funeral, things started getting off. Not long after my dad's death, Marie began asking me for a lot of small favors. It started innocently enough. Could I help mow the lawn at their house on weekends, since Dad used to do that? Could I drive her to run some errands because she didn't feel up to it? I said sure a few times, wanting to be helpful. Then the requests escalated. She asked if, I could chip in money to help fund some renovations on the house. The house my dad and Marie lived in. She said the place needed a new roof and some other fixes, and she implied my dad

would have wanted me to help take care of the family home. This felt weird because the house is 100% hers now and I wasn't living there, but I still tried to be kind. I paid a small amount for one repair, mostly out of guilt and not wanting an argument. But I drew the line when she started talking about a full kitchen remodel. I told her I wasn't comfortable financing her home upgrades. By this point, I was starting to feel taken advantage of. It was like the moment dad was gone, she suddenly wanted to latch on to me, for emotional support, sure, but also for financial and practical support. She even asked me at one point if she and Nancy could move in with me temporarily because the house felt too empty without Dad and because Nancy was between apartments.

That temporary request sounded super open-ended and honestly, it set off alarm bells. I had a small apartment at the time and I really value my space, so I said no, sorry, that wouldn't work for me. Marie kept trying to guilt-trip me, saying stuff like family sticks together and I'm all alone now, you know, but I held my ground on that one. The breaking point in our relationship came with an incident involving Nancy about a year after dad passed. Nancy, my step-sister, is a couple years younger than me. One weekend, she texted me out of the blue saying there was a power outage in their neighborhood and asked if she could

crash at my apartment for the weekend. I was going to be out of town anyway, visiting a friend in another city, so I figured, sure, why not? I felt a bit hesitant. To be honest, we weren't close and she'd never asked to stay over before, but she insisted it was an emergency situation and I wanted to be nice. I told her where my spare key was hidden and said she could let herself in. Well, that was a huge mistake. I came back Sunday evening to find my apartment absolutely trashed. I'm talking empty beer bottles, pizza boxes on my coffee table, a stain on my carpet, and even one of my dining chairs was cracked. It didn't take a detective to figure out Nancy had thrown a party at my place. My living rooms smelled like stale beer and there were even a couple of googie substances

and strangers' jackets left behind. I was livid. I immediately called Nancy, straight to voicemail, and then Marie. I wasn't hysterical or anything, but I was fuming and demanded an explanation. It turned out Nancy had lied about the power outage. There was no blackout. She just wanted a place to host a party away from her mom's supervision, and since I was away, she saw an opportunity. When I eventually got a hold of her, Nancy was way too casual about it. She was like, oh yeah, sorry about the mess. I thought I cleaned most of it up. My bad. My bad? I told her and Marie that they needed to come over and clean every inch of my apartment and pay for the damages, the broken chair and a ruined rug. Marie actually tried to downplay it, saying Nancy

was just a kid, she was 22, not exactly a little kid, and that it was just a small gathering that maybe got out of hand. I remember telling her that 22 is old enough to know not to trash someone's home. We had a huge argument. Finally, Nancy did come over the next day with a garbage bag and half-assed an apology while cleaning. She did pay to replace the chair, with Marie's money, I suspect, but neither of them seemed to fully grasp how violating that felt. that incident, I was done playing nice. I pulled back a lot. I wasn't rude or cutting them off completely, but I stopped going out of my way to visit or help with things. I think they noticed, because for the next year or so our interactions were minimal. Honestly, I was busy with my own

life too, I got a new job, and I saved up the inheritance money I got from my dad to finally buy a house of my own, just this year. It's my first house, which I'm really proud of, and I invested a lot of my savings and dad's life insurance money into it. It's not huge, but it's mine. This brings us to the recent drama. A couple months ago, I moved into my new house and hosted a housewarming party. I invited close friends, a few cousins, and some family. I did include Marie and Nancy on the invite list, partly because I didn't want to be overtly exclusionary and caused drama by leaving them out. In hindsight, maybe I shouldn't have, but what's done is done, the party was going fine at first.

Marie showed up with a bottle of wine as a gift, and Nancy came along too. We were cordial. I gave some family members a tour of the house, and I noticed at one point that Marie was lingering around in the hallway near my bedroom while I was showing someone the guest room. I didn't think much of it at the time. Later, as we gathered in the living area, I heard Marie making an announcement sorts to a small group of relatives. She said something like, I'm so happy for me and her new home. It's beautiful. And don't worry, I've got a spare key now, so I'll be checking in often. My head snapped up at that.

I was like, wait, what? You have a spare key to my house? Marie smiled and pulled out a key, waving it a little, and said, yes, I found one in the kitchen drawer labeled as a spare. I figured it had begun. good for me to hold on to it. You know, just in case of emergencies. Plus, now that Nancy's moving out of state for her job, I'll have so much free time, I can come visit you all the time. I was caught completely off guard and honestly embarrassed because this was set in front of others. Some of my other relatives were looking at us, and a couple of my friends gave me WTF eyes. I managed to half smile and said, uh, we'll talk about that later, Marie.

I didn't want to create a scene right then and there at my own house warming. She just went, oh, of course, and pocketed my key like it was no big deal. The moment the party was over and everyone left, I was freaking out. I felt violated again. The next morning, first thing, I called a locksmith and had all my locks changed. I wanted to do that either way because the house was a new purchase and I didn't want some random old owner showing up. I didn't even tell Marie, I figured she'd find out when she tried to use that key. To be clear, I never gave her permission to take a spare key. She literally must

have snooped in my kitchen or wherever and taken it. Well, surprise, surprise, she did try to use it. Because about a week later was my cousin's baby shower, which is where everything truly blew up. I went to my cousin's baby shower. A lot of family was there, including Marie and also Nancy, who was in town for the party before her move. I was keeping my distance from them, just enjoying time with other cousins and the mom to be. I didn't want drama at someone else's celebration. Toward the end of the baby shower, when everyone was having cake, Marie comes up to me in front of a few people, including my pregnant cousin and some aunts, and she looks upset.

She says, kind of loudly, why didn't you tell me you changed your locks? I was caught off guard, but I responded calmly, because it's my house and I can do what I want with it. Why are you trying to get into my house unannounced, Marie? I was firm. I didn't care if others heard at that point, because she was the one who approached me in public. She got flustered and said, I was trying to surprise you with some homemade lasagna and have lunch together, but I couldn't get in. I thought we were closer than this. Why would you change

the locks on your own stepmother without telling me? At this point, a hush had fallen over the little group around us. Some other family members were looking over. I felt put on the spot, but I also felt irritation. She basically announced to everyone that she tried to enter my home without asking me first. I replied, Marie, I changed the locks because you took my spare key. You without asking. I value my privacy. You can't just decide to let yourself into my house whenever you want. That's not okay. I kept my tone as even as I could, but I was definitely angry. She started getting teary-eyed and raised her voice a bit, saying, I'm just trying to keep this family together. Ever since your father died, I feel like you're drifting away. I only took the key

so I could help you if you ever needed anything. I thought you'd appreciate having someone looking out for you, like a mother would. That hit a nerve. She never acted like a mother to me when Dad was around. Why the sudden clinginess now? So I said, in front of everyone, Marie, please stop. Let's be real, you never treated me like your daughter when Dad was alive. We were never that close.

I'm sorry if this hurts you, but you're overstepping. my boundaries. Taking my key and trying to come over without asking is overbearing. I need you to respect my privacy and my space. Marie started full on crying. She was sobbing and said, I can't believe you're doing this to me. After all we've been through. I love you like my own. I'm just trying to be there for you. She was making a scene, and I was feeling both angry and awkward because people were definitely staring now. One of my older relatives, a great aunt or something, hurried over to comfort Marie and gave me a really harsh look, like I was a monster. My cousin whose shower it was looked kind of annoyed. Probably that this drama was hijacking her baby

shower, and a couple of my younger cousins came to stand by me like moral support. I was just standing there stiffly. At that point, things took a turn for the bizarre. Marie suddenly looked dizzy and before I knew it, she fainted, or pretended to, not sure honestly, onto the floor. This startled everyone. People rushed to help her, fanning her and getting water. Someone yelled to call 911, but then Marie came around within like a minute, saying she was fine, that it was just the stress and oh, the room was too hot. I honestly had no idea if she actually fainted or if it was like an attention thing. That effectively ended the confrontation because now everyone was fussing over her.

And it also effectively ended the baby shower on a super awkward note. I left pretty soon after, because I was just done with the whole situation. I gave my cousin, the mom to be, a hug and apologize that her party got derailed, and then I dipped out. Since that public blow up, my family has been split about it. Some of the older generation, like that great aunt, a couple of older uncles, are saying I was out of line and heartless. I've heard words like ungrateful and cruel thrown around, because they think Marie is just trying to reach out and I'm shutting her down. On the other hand, a lot of my younger cousins and friends who know the backstory are totally on my

side, saying Marie way overstepped and that changing the locks was 100% the right move. They also think the feigning was super fake, to put it mildly. So here I am, kind of stuck in the middle of a family drama I never wanted. Part of me feels bad because, yeah, maybe I could have handled it more discreetly or gently. I don't know. But a bigger part of me is still angry that my boundaries keep getting trampled by this woman who suddenly acts like we're super close family, but only after my dad was gone. It's like she's trying to hold on to me as a replacement or something, and it doesn't feel genuine. I haven't spoken to Marie since the baby shower incident. She hasn't reached out to me some family members are pressuring me to apologize to keep the peace, but I really don't feel like I should

have to apologize for protecting my own space. I honestly just want to know if I'm the asshole here for how I handled it. Update 1. First, I want to say thanks for the feedback and perspectives. It's been a few days since the baby shower confrontation and I've made a decision. I'm not going to engage with family members who think I'm in the wrong here. I talked it out with a couple of my cousins, the ones who actually understand the situation, and they really reinforced that I did nothing terrible by setting a boundary. I also made sure to reach out to my cousin, the one whose baby shower got derailed, to apologize again for the scene. She was really understanding about it and told me not to worry at all. In fact, she said she and her husband both thought Marie was

way out of line. So thankfully I didn't damage my relationship with them, they know I wasn't trying to steal the spotlight or cause drama. Interestingly, Marie herself hasn't actually contacted me since the confrontation. All this backlash is coming through other relatives on her behalf. If she really wanted to make peace or understand my side, you'd think she'd reach out to me directly instead of sending a squad of flying monkeys, air, well, relatives, to guilt trip me. But clearly she'd rather play the victim and have others do the talking. Some of my older relatives are still clutching their personal.

pearls over this and have been blowing up my phone with calls and texts. One aunt left a voicemail basically saying I should be ashamed for turning my back on family and that Marie was just trying to love me and keep my dad's memory alive or something. I deleted that crap. I also got a nasty Facebook message from an older cousin, who I'm not even close to, calling me cold-hearted. It's honestly kind of ridiculous. These are people who weren't around for the day-to-day of my life after dad died.

They have no idea how pushy Marie got. They just see a widow crying and assume I must be a jerk. Well, I'm done trying to justify myself to them. I've decided I'm going to focus on the people who have been supportive, my friends, my younger cousins, and a few other relatives who actually bothered to hear my side. Those who truly know me know that I'm not some cruel, heartless person. I mean, come on, I put up with a lot of uncomfortable stuff from Marie and Nancy, before I finally snapped. If the others can't see that, then that's on them, not me.

So yeah, I haven't apologized and I do not plan to apologize for setting a reasonable boundary in my own home. I feel a bit bad that a family event got messy, but I don't feel bad for standing up for myself. I've been keeping my distance from the negativity. If I get a whiff that a call or text is someone trying to scold me about this, I ignore it or reply with a brief, I'm not discussing this, hope you're well and then move on. I also realized something kind of important. This is the first home I've ever owned, bought with a lot of my dad's inheritance and life insurance money, actually. That means a lot to me. It's like the last gift from my father in a way. I'll be damned if I don't feel secure and at peace in it. I think my dad would actually be proud of me

for standing up for myself. He always taught me to not let people bulldoze my boundary. even family. Anyway, I'm feeling more confident now and sticking to my guns. The plan is to just let this blow over. Marie might be expecting me to come crawling with an apology to mend things, but that's not happening. If she genuinely wants to talk and respect my boundaries, she knows my number. But so far, all she's done is rally some relatives on her side to guilt-trip me, and I'm not playing that game. Update 2, it's been about two weeks since the last update, and things had been quiet, until they weren't. So, Marie took to Facebook to do some public venting, and it was hella manipulative. I wouldn't have even seen it so soon,

but a friend of mine, who is still Facebook friends with Marie, gave me a heads up and sent screenshots. Marie posted a bunch of old photos from like a decade ago, family picks from when I was maybe 16 or 17. These were pictures of me, Dad, Marie, and Nancy all together. at some family outing. To anyone looking at them, we probably look like a happy blended family. I remember that day and I was miserable, I only went along to keep Dad happy. I felt like an awkward outsider the whole time. Even in those photos, I'm just politely smiling on the side. Anyway, the caption she wrote was the real shitty. She wrote, no mother is ever willing to believe that one day her child might be the one to break her heart. And then a broken

hard emoji for good measure. Like, seriously? She didn't name me, but it was painfully obvious what she meant. She's basically calling me her child and saying I broke her heart. When I read that, I had a mix of anger and just disgust. This woman is really out here on social media playing the victim, acting like we had this loving mother-daughter bond that I arbitrarily decided to shatter. It's honestly surreal. We never had that. kind of relationship. Not even close. And broadcasting that narrative to her friends slash family on Facebook is so low. The comments on the post were just as cringy. A bunch of her friends and a couple of extended family members who clearly only know her side were commenting things like,

Oh, you're a wonderful mother, don't let anyone tell you otherwise, and she'll come around, give her time, or the ever popular. Kids can be so ungrateful these days. You did your best raising her. I nearly threw my phone reading that BS. I wanted to jump in and set the record straight so badly, like, correction, dear commenters, she didn't raise me, and I'm not her damn child. But I knew that engaging on Facebook would just be adding fuel to the fire. It had turned into a messy comment war, and I have zero interest in that kind of drama in public.

What I did do was save those screenshots and share them with my supportive cousins and friends, basically like look at this shit. Seeing that post made me 100% sure that Marie's actions toward me after dad's death were never really about genuine love or wanting to be my mom. It feels like it was about control and maybe money. I mean, think about it.

She didn't try to bond with me for years. But as soon as I'm the one with some inheritance money in a house, things that came after dad passed, suddenly she's all my daughter, my daughter, and inserting herself everywhere. When I set a boundary, she goes my child broke my heart on Facebook. That's not how a real loving parent figure behaves. That's how someone who is trying to manipulate guilt behaves.

Anyway, I did not respond to the Facebook post publicly. I haven't spoken to Marie at all, actually. And I don't plan to. If she wanted an actual relationship, this was the wrong move. Going on social media to passive-aggressively shame me just killed any remaining sympathy I had. Also, pretty much everyone in the family saw that post or heard about it. It's created this further rift, like some of the older relatives thought it was sad but understandable. And the younger ones were messaging me like this is so messed up. I'm sorry you have

to deal with this. The post has since been deleted, by the way. I'm not sure if someone told her to take it down or if she realized herself that it might backfire. Maybe she got the attention she wanted from it and then removed it, who knows. But the damage is done as far as I'm concerned. I see now that this isn't just normal grief or wanting connection, it's a narrative she's crafting where she's the abandoned, unappreciated mother and I'm the horrible stepchild. No, thanks. At this point, I'm honestly just focusing on my own life. I'm relieved I didn't respond, because nothing I say is going to change her mind or the story she's telling herself and others, about this situation. If anything else crazy happens, I'll update again, but I kind of hope

things just settle down. Update 3, about a week and a half after the Facebook fiasco, I thought things were finally dying down. The Facebook post was gone and I naively hoped maybe Marie had backed off. Nope, silly me. Instead of posting more publicly, she switched tactics to more direct contact, just not with her own phone. She had to her own phone. She had to had Nancy reach out to me. So a few days ago, I get a text from Nancy, my step-sister. We haven't really talked since the apartment party incident except awkwardly at family events. Her message was basically a paragraph saying something like, I don't understand how you can treat mom like this. She has been nothing less than a mother to you and you've broken her

heart. She's been crying for days. You owe her a talk at least. family is all we have left after your dad's passing, yada yada. It was packed with guilt-tripping language, painting me as this villain who's abandoning the only mother I've known. Cue my eye roll, because come on. She and I both know Marie was never a mother to me, I took a couple hours to cool off and decided to respond once, very clearly. I texted Nancy back something along the lines of, I'm only going to say this once. Marie was not a mother to me, she was my dad's wife, and we were cordial at best. I didn't abandon her, I just need my space and I won't tolerate anyone taking advantage

of me or disrespecting my privacy. If you're trying to guilt me, it's not going to work. I'm sorry she's upset, but that doesn't mean I'm doing anything wrong by setting boundaries. Please respect that and stop contacting me about this. Well, that apparently didn't go over well. Nancy replied almost immediately in a defensive, nasty tone. She said something like, Wow, you've always been a selfish bitch then.

Thanks for clarifying. And then a jab about how Dad would be disappointed in how I'm treating his wife. That last part really pissed me off, because if Dad were alive, none of this crap would be happening in the first place. I know he'd actually be livid at them for pulling the these stunts. I didn't even bother to continue the exchange with Nancy. I had said my piece and her response just confirmed that there was no point in engaging further. So I decided it was time to

cut the last thread. I blocked Nancy's number and, while I was at it, I blocked Marie's too, even though she hadn't directly texted, I wouldn't put it past her to try eventually. I also blocked them on social media. Additionally, I've taken some precautions regarding my home. I got a camera doorbell recently and I'm in the process of upgrading my home security system. Basically, I'm making sure they have no easy access to me or my property. Honestly, once I hit block on them, I felt a huge weight off my shoulders. I hadn't realized how much anxiety this whole thing was causing me until I saw their names removed from my phone.

It's like I can finally breathe and focus on my life without waiting for the next guilt trip or ambush. For now, I'm done with the drama. I'm not planning any more updates because I genuinely hope this is the end of it. I've been spending time with the people who actually care about me in a healthy way. In fact, I booked a little weekend getaway with two of my close friends, just a short road trip to a beach town, to celebrate moving into my new home and detox from all this family BS. If Marie or Nancy somehow try to breach those blocks or show up at my door,

trust me, there will be firm no contact enforced. But honestly, I think they got the message. The Facebook pity party didn't reel me back in, the attempted personal guilt trip through Nancy backfired, and now they have no way to reach me. Maybe this will force them to actually reflect, or maybe they'll just find a new narrative that doesn't involve me. Don't know, don't care. I'm moving on.

I protected my peace, just like I said I would, and I have zero regrets about it. Life is too short for this kind of toxic drama. I'm out.