Reddit Stories - My PARTNER'S closest pal covertly harassed me, FABRICATED FALSEHOODS, and ridiculed my every

Episode Date: April 15, 2026

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #harassment #falseaccusations #toxicrelationships #emotionalabuse #supportSummary: My partner's closest friend covertly harassed me, spreading fabricated falsehoods and ridiculing me at every opportunity. This toxic behavior created a hostile environment, straining my relationship with my partner. I felt isolated and disrespected, ultimately questioning the friendship and its impact on my well-being and mental health.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, harassment, falsehoods, toxicfriendship, emotionalabuse, relationshipadvice, mentalhealth, support, boundaries, friendshipdrama, selfcare, personalgrowth, conflictresolution, trustissues, copingstrategies, lifeadviceBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6816713/support.This episode includes AI-generated content.

I hope you enjoy this story. My partner's closest pal covertly harassed me, fabricated falsehoods, and ridiculed my every action for 12 months. Upon addressing the issue at last, he accused me of being abusive and warned of exposing me. Fiancé's parents My fiancé has the biggest heart, would literally give you the shirt, pants, and hat off his body if you asked for it. He's a recovering people-pleaser, and I get it because I also used to be a people-people.

pleaser. We've been together five plus years. A few months ago, I started picking up on his best friend making some not-so-nice comments towards me. I'm trying to be vague, but let's just say this friend is the type to read who in the room would be most affected by being picked on, and then he picks and picks and picks on them until they can't take it anymore. Nobody ever really holds him accountable for this, and unfortunately I have somehow become his favorite target. I tried to put up with these comments, but it started getting really elaborate. The friend would make up lies about me saying things I never said. He once called me in front of all our friends, my fiancé included, just to yell you're a bad

friend, into the phone and then hang up. There's so much to it that I can't share because I'm trying to be somewhat anonymous. It started having an effect on me and my mental health, and I ended up having a full breakdown where I told my fiancé how much this was all starting to hurt me. The first time I broke down over this, he said he would talk to his friend about teasing slash messing with me less. He then told me his friend was sorry and that he'd be keeping an ear out for any other comments

and he'd jump to my defense if it happened again. A few weeks later I had a second breakdown over all this. The situation itself is hitting a very specific childhood trauma slash trigger for me, and he admitted that his friend didn't actually apologize. He actually said he was sorry I was too sensitive to understand his humor. At that point I told my fiancé my friendship with this person is over and I want zero contact from here on out, even if it means I have to miss out on events and parties that I'd otherwise love to go to.

He agreed with me that all of this is being done with the intention to get a rise out of me, and that even if we tried to get through to this friend he's so diabolical that we could never fully trust him to not treat me at least a little bit shitty. My fiancé kept asking if this meant he had to quit the project they're working on. I told him I would never tell him he had to because I know how much it means to him, but in all honesty, the fact that this person is treating me so poorly that I'm having physical stress reactions isn't enough for him to want to cut this person off does hurt a lot. The fact that it isn't a deal breaker for him is probably always going to sting a little.

He's not confrontational at all and I always knew that, but it's not about confrontation. It's about standing in my corner. And I can't spend the rest of my life with someone who isn't in my corner. This friend is getting married to my best friend in a few months, and we're both supposed to be in the wedding, but I really have no clue how. I get a literal nod in my stomach any time his name is even mentioned now. I have seen this friend one time since all of this came to a head, and he was so over-the-top nice to me that it came off as cocky. I had the second breakdown a few days afterwards because I realized I'm possibly going to spend the rest of my life on edge and on guard anytime this person is even somewhat in my vicinity, even if they aren't actively fucking with me. I don't know how to come to terms with the fact that my fiancé was

willing to lie to me on his shitty friend's behalf, but he's not willing to stand in my corner against him. I think it'll always hurt. This guy was supposed to be the best man in our wedding, and as a result we haven't been talking much about wedding plans. I think if he's still planning on this friend being in our wedding I may have to call it off for my own sanity, and that sucks so bad. This is fucking eating me alive. I love my fiancé so much. I love his big heart and the way he loves with all of it. But he loves some truly wretched people and I don't know if he'll enforce any boundaries with those people before the lack of boundaries becomes too much for me to handle. I'm just hurt and hurting. And I just want whatever outcome to play out so I can stop feeling

so guilty and awful all the time. Update 1, never thought I'd actually update this account out of sheer fucking embarrassment. But I wanted to share this for those who encouraged me to put myself first. I want you all to know my partner absolutely came through and protected me in this. We spent all this time since my last post-up until last week communicating and trying to find a resolution and walking through how it got this bad. He took a lot of accountability for that. This is not a case of me giving in.

He understands fully that this has only got so bad because it's never been handled correctly, and he had a major hand in that. There were so many more layers to this than a Reddit post ever could have conveyed. The bottom line is we are closer than ever and after a lot of talking, we decided on my partner sending a firm but not unkind message to his friend explaining the behaviors, explaining that they were hurting his partner, and that it needed to stop. He asked to write up the first draft and we could go over it together to try to perfect it. Reddit, please know the first draft my partner wrote was so spot on what I needed to read that it instantly shifted us into us versus the problem mode when we'd been stuck budding heads

for weeks. He laid everything out so clearly and in ways that we hadn't discussed, so I know it came from him. We had to tone down a lot of the big emotions. We really truly gave the message its best shot to address the situation without being hostile. We knew the response would be bad no matter what, but I don't think anything could have fucking prepared us. This man went full scorched earth and blew up everything almost immediately. He insulted my partner. He told him these events didn't happen the way I claim they do. He demanded they meet up alone with a mediator.

He even threatened to reach out to my partner's parents to fill them in, which is probably the moment we stopped taking his responses seriously. All of us are almost in our 30s. If once wasn't enough, he threatened it twice. We actually had to call them and warn them that he would be showing up at their place later this week and not to open the door. There's still a good chance he'll attempt it. We stayed respectful throughout all of this, which I feel good about. We didn't stoop to his level.

We didn't insult anyone. We asked for basic human respect and somehow it blew up spectacularly. In the end, we both received a massive wall of text from my, now ex, best friend, fully backing up her man and telling her side of the story, which is so insanely far off from what actually happened that all I can do is laugh. We've been shifting from crying to being dumbstruck to just straight up laughing because of the absurdity. I went into this thinking she was brainwashed, but it turns out I was wrong. They're a perfect match. I wish them all the best. I am sending them one last message setting the record straight, which my partner and I decided

together was the best approach apart from just ghosting, before moving on from this entirely. I'm going to make it very clear this is done. Zero contact indefinitely and I will never look back. My partner and I both deserve way better friends and we both see that so clearly now, I am so, so so fucking glad I learned my friends' true colors before we dropped $800 on a hotel for their wedding. Thank you to everyone who was kind. Not only did I put myself first in the end, but my partner did too. We're going to take this week in stride and process it all. Grieve the friendships we once thought were forever, and at the end of the week we have a conveniently timed vacation to my partner's family cottage. I think we're going to come out of this

stronger because we already feel it. Again, thank you to those who had something productive to say. And I've made my peace with all the rest. I guess if the guy does something else outlandish I'll update but for now, this chapter is closed and I'm so ready for it to start collecting dust. Update 2, hey y'all. Told myself I wouldn't update again but there has been a pretty massive development. Not sure if anyone is really that invested in this shit show but it's actually helped me to type it out the first couple times so I'll feel a bit better if I do it again. Sorry in advance for how disgustingly long this is going to be, L.O.L. A few weeks ago the asshole showed his entire hand. He sent my partner a message at 11 a.m. on a Monday and it is the most

unhinged shit I've ever read. I'll sum it up for you. The asshole said he believed my partner is in an abusive relationship and he should leave me for his own happiness. He claimed he is evidence to support this. He admitted this was the big message he would have given had they met in person in the very beginning. He also told him he was worried sending the message would make things even worse for my partner if I saw it. He said I am someone he can never forgive and he will never want to associate with ever again. He ended it by saying he hopes he'll leave me so my partner can apologize for breaking up the band, yes, it was a band, and they can start to repair their friendship. Obviously a whole lot to digest. I know y'all don't know me, but I am obviously

not abusing my partner, L.O.L. I shouldn't even have to clarify that, but I will anyways. This guy is 100% excommunicated from our lives indefinitely, not that he already wasn't at that point. In light of this new info, I'd like to share some of the things the asshole has done over the past year or so that made me realize he was fucking with me, but I didn't clock at the time because, much like some of you, I thought I was just being sensitive. One, my partner and I joined some pals, including asshole, to play a game together online, lethal company if you're familiar. I have many, many hours in the game and know the monsters quite well, so I was pretty confused when I was slaughtered by a bracken three game days in a row, almost immediately upon entering the

facility and splitting from the group. I mentioned at one point that I'd be having a lot more fun if I wasn't dying so quickly every time, and the asshole mockingly said it must be a skill issue. After a few more deaths, this time with me at least getting to explore a bit before getting my neck snapped, I asked if anyone had the control company mod installed, which allowed which allows the server host to play as the monsters. Suddenly the asshole had to go, and the lobby conveniently disbanded. I never brought my suspicions up to anyone because I knew it would be my word against his

and I had no solid proof so I wasn't positive. But when I finally mentioned it to my partner a couple of weeks ago after that text was sent, he told me he remembers the asshole staying on the ship and secretly going AFK multiple times in the game, which lines up pretty perfectly with my in-game deaths. Two, when I said the asshole was being too nice the time we saw him after my partner called him about his comments affecting me, I don't think I explained it right. My partner and I were sitting at a table at a local show and the assholes sat next to me and wouldn't stop touching my arm and asking me if I was enjoying the show. Multiple times he would just stare at me and grin as wide as he

could. If I had just been told something I did hurt my friend's partner, I don't think I'd be all over them the way this guy was to me. Hell, if it were me, I'd at least throw a sorry about the other night their way. It felt like he was gloating that he got away with it. It was comically over the top and made me and my partner very uncomfortable. We talked on the drive home and we both felt the same about it. Three, just hanging out with my friend at her place and asshole was there, so we all decided to head to my place and hang with my partner as a forsome. Right before we left the asshole asked if I knew our mutual friend's big secret. I did not.

I'm also not very close with this friend. My friend already knew and told him they should just tell me because I wouldn't be that invested, but asshole told her my partner didn't know yet and they couldn't tell me until we all got to my place and told him. He kept going on about how big the secret was and insisted that I'd freak out once I knew. He made a comment about how we were taking different cars and there was a chance my friend would just tell me on the way. So he looked her dead in the face and told her that he'd be genuinely upset. with her if she told me before he told my partner. We respected that. When we got to my place, it was obvious my partner already knew. The big secret was simply that our friend was dating someone.

I found out later that the asshole had called my partner the minute he got to his car and told him that both me and my friend didn't know and they should put on a big show of telling both of us together. My partner had known for weeks and the friend group had openly discussed it a few times, and it hadn't come up with me because, as I said, I'm not very close with this friend. I got baited, L-O-L. Truly exhausting behavior. My partner had no idea what happened until I told him about the conversation at asshole's place and my friend didn't say a word in my defense. I typed out exactly why this was ridiculous once all this came to a head and they both

refused to even acknowledge it. Four, I dyed my hair blue, my first outing with the new hair was with the whole group. I went all out on my makeup and outfit and was pretty stoked on it. I'm not exaggerating in the slightest when I say the asshole made 20 plus jokes about my hair in the span of about 15 minutes. It was pretty much every time he interacted with me, which he seemed to go out of his way to do specifically so he could make jokes about my hair. If you've ever had blue hair, then you've probably heard most of the jokes he was making. I laughed along for the first few. I can definitely handle banter as it's a huge part of almost all of my friendships. But after about 20 jokes I finally said it was getting old and asked if he had anything nice to say.

He responded by making another five jokes with a big shit-eating grin on his face and implied I was too sensitive. There truly was no off switch with the guy. Anyways, just wanted you all to know to know I'm not crazy. The asshole has literally been trying to drive me mad for at least a year, and it almost worked. My partner and I have had many conversations about all this, and I know a lot of people had a lot to say about him, but please know this was eating both of us alive. He wanted to make things work so badly, he wanted to at least try to salvage their 20-plus-year friendship. But he understands now that was never possible, and he knows neither of us deserved to be treated the way the asshole treated us. This was never just about me. If he was a good friend to my partner

maybe things would be different and we could have tried harder to get through to him, but this is just who he is at his core. He's known for being a prick for no reason and lying about it. And there's no space in either of our lives for that. Anyways, I doubt the asshole can top that message so this is the last update I'll give. My partner and I are coming out of this way stronger, the asshole has completely brainwashed my friend, and I've made my peace with it. She can have him, LOL. Godspeed to the both of them. Thanks to all who showed understanding. Hopefully this is all going to be behind us very soon, once the dust fully settles. Next story, B.F. wanted to name our future son after his family's weird tradition, and I'd have to take his last name too.

After a long talk, we found a sweet solution that made us both happy. Hello, everyone. Me, 21F, and my boyfriend, let's call him Alex, 23M, have been dating for about three years now. We've recently began talking about marriage and kids, something we both eventually want to have. The other day a real popped up on my fip of cute boy names and I saw the name Everett. I thought it was adorable and jokingly told him how it has to be our firstborn's name. He laughed and said he liked it, but it'll have to wait for the second kid. I was confused and asked him why. He told me that his family has a tradition that every firstborn boy in the family has the same

name. His oldest brother has it, his uncle has it, his grandfather has it and so on. for the sake of privacy and how oddly unique the name is, I'm not going to say it. I'm not judging in the slightest, but this is a weird name and it's honestly not my favorite. I would never say that to any of his family members, but I did tell Alex I'm not a huge fan of it. I told him I don't really want to follow those footsteps and he got upset and told me he can't be the one to break the tradition. He told me I was being an asshole for suggesting anything else. I told him I won't change my mind and we should make it a middle name or

find another compromise. Alex has five siblings. The tradition will continue if he doesn't do it. And frankly, I think I should get a say in what I name my kid. I told him since I'm the one carrying the hypothetical child for nine months, then it would already be getting Alex's last name. I should have some say in the first name. For context, I have two siblings, both girls. I'm the youngest and my eldest sisters are both married and took their husband's last names. It It makes me a little sad that when I marry Alex, my last name will go out of existence. I've talked to him about hyphenating hours, something he doesn't want to do. But anyways, I really don't want to name our firstborn son, if we ever even have a boy,

that name. He thinks I'm whining for no reason since we don't even have a kid yet and I'm not pregnant. But I think my concerns are valid. I've told some friends about it and most of them think I'm overreacting over something that doesn't even exist yet. So am I the asshole for telling my boyfriend I don't want to follow his family's tradition? Comments where Op has replied, commenter, great conversation to have before marriage and kids. You get to decide if this is a deal breaker for you. What other subjects does he believe you have no say in? Oop, downvoted, the thing is, we get along great. We've had

minor disagreements, but never argued over anything this big until now. For all the people saying break up, he's really a great guy. He thinks my last name is weird, which to be quite honest, it is L-O-L. It doesn't make me any less sad about eventually losing it. This is our first big argument and I think it's why I'm at such a loss. Commenter, and not even his own name, his big brother's name. Is every kid meant to name their first son that name? All the cousins are Gustavo or whatever. Oop, all oldest sons are supposed to have it. His dad wasn't the oldest son. So yes, a bunch of his nephews will all hold the same name at some point.

Commenter, in reply to previous commenter listed above, that's what I wondered, too. I feel like he doesn't even understand his own tradition. I think it's just one per generation, not every first born to every sibling. Oop, that's what I thought too until I met him. It's not a culture thing, I've politely asked. If it was I'd be a lot more understanding. It's just an odd tradition. Mini update, I have no idea how to make an update, but I feel like I owe it to you all to make one when the time comes so please let me know how LOL.

As of right now, I just texted him and told him that when he gets home from work we need to have a serious conversation and I have some important things to tell him. Not totally sure what those are yet, but I'm going to find a way to start the convo. Update, so, we talked. I pulled him aside after he finished work and we sat down and had a long conversation. I told him that I felt hurt that he doesn't seem to be caring about my feelings and I never intended for a joke about TikTok names to turn into all of this. I took your guy's advice and was really honest with telling him how I was really sad by the fact that I would lose my last name when we did eventually get married.

At first he seemed confused and said if it really mattered hat much to me, I could just keep my last name and our kids could have his. I told him it seemed counterproductive to keep my last name because one day I'd still die and so would the name. He asked me what I wanted to do about it and we ended up compromising that our first son would have a shortened version of the traditional name that runs in his family. Not a nickname, but we would literally just shorten the name and that would be his. And along with that when we eventually do get married, we'll hyphenate last names. I will admit Reddit got me a little in my head and had me thinking we would break up over this, so I was pretty emotional during this conversation, L.O.L. I know this isn't the super exciting update you guys wanted.

I also showed him the post and he read some of the comments. This is a direct quote from him, something he wanted me to tell you guys, thank you for helping, my name, while I was being a dick. I don't really think he was being a dick now that I've seen his side, but he's also worried he has people after him now, L.O.L. He really is a sweet guy and this wasn't anything to break up over. When we talked he expressed that he was hurt because as much as the tradition seemed silly, it was something he had always been looking forward to eventually doing. We're not engaged yet, but I have a feeling something might happen this Christmas we'll see. But yeah, I cannot believe how much that post blew up and you guys really helped me and Alex out.

Thank you all for the support.