Reddit Stories - Neglected my father s betrayal from beloved child to unwanted visitor in his home

Episode Date: May 26, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #familydrama #betrayal #unwantedvisitor #neglect #belovedchildSummary: A once beloved child becomes an unwanted visitor in their father's home, facing the consequences of neglecting his betrayal. Tensions rise as past wounds resurface, challenging their relationship and sense of family.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, familydrama, betrayal, unwantedvisitor, neglect, belovedchild, father, home, relationship, family, tensions, pastwounds, consequences, challenges, senseoffamilyBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Father created a fresh household, lost interest in me, and now I am merely a visitor in his residence while he lavishes attention on them and pretends I am invisible. Was younger I had a very good relationship with my dad. My parents divorced when I was a infant, but I spent weekdays with my mom and weekends with my dad. My dad and I were like best friends,

and we had a simple routine every weekend where we'd get five Red Box movies to finish during the weekend. We'd go fishing, we'd play soccer, and we'd bike to this little secret playground near the zoo. Something else I was used to was my dad always having new girlfriends that never lasted more than two weeks. The only one who lasted longer, a woman I really liked who lasted two years, left my dad when I was 10. But my relationship with my dad was the same as ever until I was 12 and my dad met his now wife. This woman has two kids, one older and one younger than me. They moved into my dad's apartment after only two weeks.

My room was already small, but my tiny mattress and three small plastic drawers were shoved into the corner of the room to make space for the daughter's bunk bed and dresser. Before I knew it, they started putting my bed in a closet until I came to visit and often would forget to take it out at all. When my dad moved into a bigger house, the older sister got her own room while I had to share one with the younger sister every weekend. The three small drawers I had were soon just one drawer because the little sister wanted the other two for her toys. Slowly, I started visiting my dad less and less. Then everything went especially wrong when my dad got his girlfriend pregnant after one year. They got married and I didn't know that for a whole month because he didn't even tell me. I also didn't know my baby half-sister was born until weeks after she came home from the hospital. To make his new family happy, he started

spoiling them and stopped paying child support for me and my mom. His wife is a jobless gold digger who only cooks and cleans and shops. Her older daughter is having her college paid for by my dad, and the younger daughter is the definition of a 10-year-old Sephora kid. As for my half-sister, she is still a toddler but is clearly spoiled and hates the word no. The routine I used to have with my dad is now dead. As for my stepdad, he's been with my mom since I was five. Apparently, though I don't remember it, I once called him dad and because of that my dad told me I shouldn't love that man like a dad because he's not really my father. Apparently, that's why I started acting like I hated my stepdad. I never knew why I felt that way about him since he'd never been anything but good to me,

and in the last few years I've felt much closer to him. He feels like the dad that my birth father, should try to be. Over time, my dad has started to treat me differently. He rants to me about his political beliefs and conspiracy theories about aliens and stuff. He also brags about his new business and his new family, and if I ever try to share anything with him, he gets annoyed and shuts me up before continuing with his stories. It's like now he sees me as a buddy rather than his freaking daughter. Also, it was during these last few years that I learned the reason he and my mom divorced was not because they weren't right for each other, but rather because my father cheated on my mom while visiting his family in Canada. I am now 15, and I have become a completely different

person than the one my birth dad remembers. I no longer love the beach or soccer and I now love music and reading and writing. I have written and published two books since 2022, and am writing the third in my series. My stepdad supports my dreams and loves me so much that he brags about me to friends and family and calls me his daughter. My stepdad has an actual daughter who I love like a real sister, though she lives up north with her boyfriend and I don't see her often. Still, though, I love them more than I love my birth dad and half-sister who I'm actually related to. My dad blames me for never calling, though because of how he's treated me lately, I don't feel like I owe it to him. I also go months at a time without visiting him now because I no longer feel comfortable at that

house, especially since the bed I sleep on over there is literally considered as their guest bed. In my birth dad's house, I am a guest. Because of all of this, I resent my dad. I haven't told anyone about this so no one is calling me a jerk, but I'm wondering if I am because my dad is in love with his new family and I'm wondering if it's a bad thing I'm not happy for him. Am I the jerk? Comments, just another saddie, not the jerk. Your dad, failed you. He's the only reason why you don't have a relationship with him. Glad your stepdad is good to you. Hope you're calling him dad now. The underscore Bolleram, absolutely not the jerk. Your father failed on his only task of being exactly that, a father, so you are on your right to

cut any connection you want with him. Update 1. Hello. So, I made a post a few months ago talking about how my dad has basically stopped treating me like his daughter now that he has a new family. Not much has happened since, but here's an update anyway. So, since I made the initial post, I've only visited my dad's house once and, safe to say, I truly am nothing more than an uncomfortable guest in that house. I should start off by saying that every time I spend a few months without going to his house, my dad tries to play all-innocent and calls me on Fridays to ask when he should pick me up. I never answer because he always calls me when I'm in a class or busy with studying, so he'll call my mom. But because he never asks me in advance, I tend to have plans on weekends with my cousins, friends,

or just to work on writing since I am still working on my third book and it takes a lot of focus that I can't get in his house. Actually, I'm now just going to call him Eric. He's honestly not been as much of a dad figure to me as my stepdad has. Anyway, it was my mom who had decided I would go over to his house. Despite the fact that Eric hasn't paid child support in over two years now and I hate going to his house, my mom says I should just visit from time to time to keep him from getting the court involved. She confuses me, sometimes saying that he's a deadbeat man, but also sometimes saying that he's my

loving dad who deserves my respect. However, under the circumstances, I'm fairly certain that nothing would be any different since I never visit him and he doesn't pay child support anyway. In fact, once on Christmas, he bought a bunch of new gifts for his family and wrapped them up and everything. But weeks before Christmas when I was visiting, he drove to Walmart so his wife could do groceries and he handed me $200 and said, Merry Christmas. Buy yourself something and the rest can be child support or whatever. I bought two books, but the rest of the money that was supposedly child support was nothing near to the amount he owed. I have told my mom I would be happier if he lost custody of me and my stepdad adopted me,

but she thinks that's too extreme and says, he's still your dad. He deserves your respect and love. Now, about the weekend I visited him, from the minute Eric picked me up, all he talked about was his new family. He talked about the older sister and her boyfriend, the younger sister and the shopping she does, and the my half-sister who can now talk a little bit. I stayed silent the whole ride until he asked me a question about my school, and when I answered his question he got frustrated and went into a conspiracy theory rant. I tuned him out for the rest of the drive after that. The rest of the

weekend wasn't any better. The older sister did what she always does when I visit and locked herself in her room, only coming out when I left the house or when I was in the bathroom so she wouldn't have to talk to me. And the younger sister had a friend of hers over and her friend had her stuff tossed on my bed and was sitting on it because it's the bed she sleeps in when she has sleepovers. Eric's wife did a poor job of hiding how bothered she was by me visiting. More than once, she has been completely shocked I was visiting because Eric didn't tell her so she couldn't disagree. And also, most of the weekend consisted of Eric taking me and my half-sister to a playground so she could run around with her friends, and I sat on a bench.

to read, but I didn't have much time to myself since Eric kept leaving and told me to keep an eye on my half-sister who is a wild and fussy kid. I am not a babysitter, and while I am good with kids, that does not mean I enjoy putting my own time aside to look after them when they're not my responsibility. I had to spend two days in either pure chaos or discomfort, and I had a talk with my mom about me not wanting to go over there anymore. She said that's fine and she won't force me to go anymore, but since she said that before, I don't believe her. I don't have anyone to really talk to about this, and this whole situation is stressing me out because I don't remember my dad ever being as happy as he is now, and I still sometimes feel like I should be happy for him. I don't know what to do,

and any advice on anything I could do would be helpful. Everyone who's commented on my last post so far has said I'm not the jerk and that Eric isn't acting the way a dad should, but he still reaches out from time to time and says I'm his baby girl who he loves. Honestly, I almost cry whenever he says that because it reminds me of how we used to be. Am I overthinking all of this or overreacting? What should I do? Am I the jerk here because I'm not happy for my dad? Comments Catch hefty 5872. You should tell your mom the more she forces you to go to your dads the more it's going to ruin your relationship with her as she's not listening

to what you want and how you feel. You should also tell her you no longer trust what she says as she has told you before that she will no longer force you into going but she does it anyway. If you can't talk to your mom, have a one-on-one chat with your stepdad and see if he can help when it comes to your mom. Update 2. Hello, everyone. It's only been a couple of days since my last post. Since then, I have taken the advice most of you have given me and I've talked to my mom about how I don't want to keep being forced by her to visit Eric, my sperm donor, as most of you referred to him as. Long story short, I'm not 100% sure she won't continue to send me over to Eric's house,

but she did wind up sending him long texts, chewing him out for not treating me right and telling him to step up and pay his child support. He didn't answer her, though, so I followed some other advice and wrote him a long text myself. that detailed how I felt about his treatment of me the last few years. The thing is, as soon as I sent that text, he called me to yell at me and called me spoiled and overdramatic. He said it's my fault we don't have a relationship since I never visit or talk to him anymore, and because I mentioned the unpaid child support, he said that I was only reaching out to him for money. I nearly cried during that phone call and wound up just hanging

up on him. He sent some angry text to my mother as well. But later that day, he left a voicemail on my phone saying, Money is kind of tight for me right now. I'm completely broke. You know I love you, right? The thing is that I know that's a lie because I'm always seeing my younger stepsister make TikTok videos showing off the Sephora and other expensive crap he buys her all the time.

I think I'm done trying. And some of you suggested asking my stepdad for help. I wish I could, but when I asked my mom again if he could adopt me, she said something that absolutely crushed me. Apparently, my stepdad himself said he doesn't feel like he should adopt me. My stepdad is a very kind and sympathetic man, but he's also extremely unconfrontational and thinks it would be like a slap in the face to Eric if he adopted me. Also, because I noticed some confusion about this in the comments on my last update, the reason my parents divorced was because he cheated, but it wasn't with his current wife.

My parents split up when I was still basically an infant, and Eric lived in Canada where he jumped from girlfriend to girlfriend there before he moved down here and continued to jump from girlfriend to girlfriend. When I was 12, he met and knocked up his wife, Alejandra, and married her without telling me till a month after their courthouse wedding. Also, some of you asked how old I am. I am 15. It feels ridiculous that I have this stress on me at my age, and I can't really talk to you.

to anyone about it. I can't talk to my stepdad because he's always working and I'm only ever with him when my mom is there too, and I don't like talking to her because she always tells me that I'm too young to really feel how I feel. The last time I tried to discuss my mental health with my mom, I asked her if I could start going to therapy and she said that therapists are dumb and that I can just talk to her or pray to God if anything is wrong. I'm not super religious, and talking to her about anything serious makes me deeply uncomfortable. It's not that I don't love her, since she is my mom after all, but she's pretty intense and intimidating. My dad has not reached out to me again since his voicemail. Frankly, I don't want to even think about him for a long while now if he suddenly

realizes how badly he's screwed up with me and apologizes, then maybe I'll try to rebuild our relationship. As for my stepdad, he may not want to adopt me, but he still calls me his daughter, just his stepdaughter, and I truly feel loved by him. I love his parents like they're my own grandparents, and his whole family is so warm and loving. I might make another update if anything else happens, but for now I'm just going to focus on school and my books. Maybe now that I understand that Eric really doesn't care that much about me anymore, I can finally focus on finishing my third book. I dedicated my first book to him, and I honestly don't regret it. I dedicated that book to the dad he used to be. It's not like he'll ever read that book since he doesn't think

it's smart that I want to be a writer, but I don't care. I'm done. Thank you to everyone who gave me advice and told me I wasn't the jerk. I feel so much better with those reassurances. Thank you. Comments Tiny underscore Dancer 97 I'd reply that maybe he'd stop being broke if he wasn't spoiling his new family and ignoring his obligations to his actual daughter. and tell him that honestly he hasn't acted like my dad in years so let's just stop pretending and he can be happy with his replacements because I'm done being ignored and walked on by someone who obviously doesn't want me there. Jezlander, you say your father sent you a text saying you know I love you, don't you?

You should respond. No. No, I don't know this at all. I know you say you do, but you have never shown me this love. Love isn't just a word you can throw at me as you'd throw. throw a bone to a dog. Love is a feeling of support and safety. It's a deep felt knowledge of total acceptance. It's the tissue when I cry, the back rub when I am sad or hurt. It's that wink at a shared joke and the hug of joy and glorious celebration. That, Daddy Dear, is love.

That is what I both expect and need from you. As things stand, you are a horrible disappointment and a terrible father. Update 3, hi everyone. It's been about nine days since my last update. I just want to say, thank you all for your support and advice. There were a lot of people asking similar questions, and it was all a bit overwhelming

so I didn't respond to any of them directly, but I will answer those questions here before I get on to the actual reason for this update. So, a lot of you were saying that I should talk to a school counselor or something. The thing is that I do virtual homeschool, and my mom works from home a lot, so I'm honestly just a bit too scared to try that. Plus, even if I did talk to my counselor without my mom being around to here, I really don't trust any adults to keep these kinds of things to themselves. I know that sounds a bit dumb and paranoid, but it's really just how my brain thinks. A lot of you also said that I should bring up the therapy thing with my mom again, but I know for a fact that won't work.

My mom really doesn't believe in therapy and believes that praying to God or having her preach about the Bible to me will solve everything. As for my stepdad, I love the guy like a real father, and I see him as my true dad even if he doesn't want to adopt me, but he really is no help with the therapy issue either because he always just agrees with whatever my mom says to avoid arguments. But I'm doing fine right now, though, and I honestly think things are going to start getting better. And I think this because I'm pretty sure my mom is finally going to file for sole custody and court-ordered child support. One thing I guess I should have made clear is that my parents

sorted out their custody and child support agreement amongst themselves when they divorced. The agreement is that I spend weekends with my dad, and he pays my mom $100 per week. I'm pretty sure my dad only stuck to that agreement to keep himself looking good until he could finish his U.S. legalization process, since he used to be an immigrant from Canada. Once he was legalized, he stopped paying child support and began spoiling his new fam. Anyway, I went to my dad's house last weekend. This time, my mom didn't force me, and I actually decided I wanted to go because I wanted to give my dad one last chance. He picked me up from my mom's house, and we didn't get down the street before we were fighting. I was excitedly telling him about a business

idea I had where I can make book boxes and sell books with DIY necklaces and hand-painted bookmarks that matchbook covers, and he was telling me my idea was stupid and unprofitable and a waste of money and time. It was an hour-long drive to his house, and he was getting political or angry over every little thing I said. When I told him I was thinking about applying to colleges like Harvard or University of Chicago in the future. He began to yell about all the dangerous Cuban-Mexican immigrants in Chicago and began saying that Harvard is a waste of time since it's just as good as any other college, but rich people go there, which is why it's so famous. I wound up yelling at him that he can't act so high and mighty over non-white immigrants

because he was also an immigrant not too long ago. Also, I never understand why it is my dad is always so racist about Hispanic people when my mom and his current wife are both Latinos. He went on one rant after another, and I was so sick of it that instead of staying quiet like always, I actually argued back. Because of that, my dad spent the whole weekend complaining about my bad attitude. I told my mom about all of this. I think the final nail in the coffin that finally pushed her to want sole custody was when I told her about a rant my dad went on about the difference between men and women. I wound up memorizing and writing down everything he said and texted it to my mom. I asked her not to talk to him about it, but she was pissed at him.

Here are some of the things he said. Ninety-nine percent of women want to latch on to rich men. Nearly all women are greedy and unloyal. Men don't like successful and independent women because they're prideful and bossy. It's more important for a wife to respect her husband than it is for him to respect her. It is wrong for wives to make more than their husbands, and so much more. And then he smiled and said, but you're the exception, pretty girl. There was so much more that happened just last weekend. Like him saying some of my guy friends don't count as real men since some of them are gay. And trying to tell me my summer volunteering opportunity in DR is a bad idea since the people

there are different, even though my mom's side of the family comes from there. I won't list every annoying thing he did, and I'm finally done. This was his last chance, and he blew it. I just want to say I'm pretty sure my mom is not sending me over anymore. She spent all morning looking for my birth certificate because she's wondering if she needs it for court. She wants to get me full time and have my dad pay child support. At the moment, he owes a lot of child support and having him contribute financially would help me so much with preparing for college. Also, I did not mention the names of my books in the other posts.

I didn't share them because I didn't want a bunch of internet strangers seeing my social media tags at the back of the book, but I will share the titles with anyone who DMS me. I will probably make another update if anything else happens. Hopefully, my next update will be after we've gone to court. Update 4 Hey everyone It's been three months since my last post, and quite a lot of crappy stuff has gone down. Let me start off by saying,

to everyone who DM'd me and sent me their support. I know I haven't answered a lot of you, but that's just because the amount of messages is well over 50 and it's kind of overwhelming. But I appreciate all of you, especially those who have reached out and said that they've gone through similar things. You're all so strong, and I hope you're doing all right. So, as for the actual update, my mom never took Eric, bio dad, to court. After three days of listening to my mom, and Eric scream at each other over the phone, insulting each other and hearing Eric yell about child support being stupid and a government con, he sent $200 to shut my mom up and now sends that same amount of money randomly. My mom lied about not forcing me to see him again.

I remember we were in the car when Eric called on a random Friday to ask if I wanted to come over, and maybe I was a little bit cold, but my mom got mad at me after I said I didn't want to go. I reminded her that she promised not to force me, and I got yelled at and guilt tripped into calling Eric back and agreeing. That weekend was awful. Eric tried to fight with me on his sexist beliefs, he complained that I was complaining too much about his inappropriate jokes and stories, and then there was a whole issue about us arguing over women's workout clothes.

For some context on that last one, Eric and I saw a couple biking together in his neighborhood, and he commented that the lady was trying to get some because she was in leggings and a crop top. I told him she was just working out, and that the guy she was with was probably her BF. Plus, she was at least 10 years younger than Eric, but he just said that doesn't mean she's not trying to get more guys with those clothes. Women only wear workout clothes to attract men and get elated, and I argued with him. I just gave up when I said, if I wear workout clothes to exercise and lose weight to be healthier, am I trying to get a man's attention? And he said yes. That was that. If there was any respect in me

left for that man, it's now completely gone. Plus, he spent the whole weekend disrespecting his wife and insulting her, and despite how awkward I feel around her, I wish I'd known what kind of a person my dad was three years ago so I could have told her to leave him while she had the chance to. No woman deserves a man as awful as my dad. I now feel like I no longer have any father figure at all in my life, and here's why. Weeks ago, I got into a bit of a debate with my mom about adopted kids. I told her I didn't want to give birth as an adult and would rather adopt, and she said I shouldn't bring another person's dirty kids into my home, and she said it would be hard to love grandkids that don't look like me. I know it's kind of a weird conversation for a

16 years old to have. I recently turned 16 this summer, but it came up anyway. When I asked for stepdad's opinion, I found what is probably the real reason he doesn't want to adopt me. He told me that he doesn't think adopted kids can be loved the same way as blood kids. He said adopted children aren't as lovable, and I realized that despite calling me his daughter and talking about me and how much he loves me, he doesn't love me as much as his birth kids. And also, I have lost all respect for him after this past weekend. There's a lot of stuff that happens in my family, and my mom tries to blind me from all of it, so my cousins are my only source of information.

I spent the weekend with my oldest cousin, 21f, and another one of my cousins, 20F, and I ranted to them about what my stepdad had said. After that, they told me something that made me feel more disgusted and betrayed than I've ever felt before. My stepdad cheated on my mom a few years back, and she stayed with him. The reason my mom divorced Eric was due to his infidelity, but she chose to forgive my stepdad and never told me about it, letting me continue to live with a man who did the same thing that Eric did to her.

Eric's cheating ruined my life, and I don't think I can look at my stepdad the same way again. Before this past weekend, I was laughing with my stepdad and hanging out with him. Now, I'm glad my mom is having me spend time with my grandma because it means I have more time to process all of this before I have to see him again. I'm a junior in high school now. I'm planning to work harder on online jobs, applying for scholarships, and more so that I'm ready to get away from all of this as soon as I get to college. If anything else major happens, I'll update again, but this is it for now.