Reddit Stories - Now, Ab Syvex, who EMPLOYED HTMe during PREGNANCY, UNEXPECTEDLY gained custody of their

Episode Date: July 17, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #custodybattle #unexpected #pregnancy #familydrama #legaladviceSummary: Now, Ab Syvex, who EMPLOYED HTMe during PREGNANCY, UNEXPECTEDLY gained custody of their child. The sudden turn of events led to a complex legal battle, stirring up family drama and raising questions about parental rights and responsibilities.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, custodybattle, unexpected, pregnancy, familydrama, legaladvice, parentalrights, custodydispute, childcustody, familylaw, custodylaws, courtcase, legalbattle, unexpectedoutcome, parentingdilemma, familyconflictBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Now, Obsyvex, who employed H.T. Me during pregnancy, unexpectedly gained custody of their child. When I objected, he took legal action, and the judge granted him the right to visit. I am a 31-year-old female, and I have an 8-year-old daughter Emma. Her father, Mark, is 34M. We broke up when Emma was six months old and he hasn't seen her since she was two years old. Now he's suddenly back wanting to play dad because he got religious. Mark and I dated for three years before Emma was born.

At first everything seemed normal but things started getting bad when I got pregnant. He would get angry about stupid things like me not wanting to clean the apartment when I was exhausted from morning sickness. He started calling me lazy and useless. When I was seven months pregnant he shoved me into a wall during an argument about money. I fell backwards and hit my head on the corner of our coffee table. I had to go to the emergency room because I was bleeding and dizzy. The doctors were worried about the baby but everything turned out okay. Mark cried and apologized after that incident.

He said he was just stressed about becoming a father and promised it would never happen again. I believed him because I was young and stupid and thought people could change. The pregnancy was already so far along and I didn't want to be a single mom. After Emma was born, things got worse instead of better. Mark would get angry when she cried at night. He said I was doing something wrong as a mother and that's why she wouldn't stop crying. When Emma was three months old, he grabbed my wrist so hard during an argument that I had bruises for a week's. He twisted it and said I was being dramatic when I winced from the pain.

Another time when Emma was four months old he threw a plate at the wall next to my head because dinner was cold. The plate shattered and pieces of ceramic hit my arm and left small cuts. The breaking point came when Emma was six months old. Mark came home drunk from a bar with his friends. Emma was crying because she was hungry and I was trying to make her bottle. Mark started yelling at me to shut her up. When I told him to lower his voice because he was making her cry harder, he completely lost it. He grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me while screaming that I was a terrible mother and that

Emma hated me. Then he backhanded me across the face so hard that my lips split open and started bleeding. That night while Mark was passed out drunk I packed everything I could fit in my car. I took Emma and drove to my sister's house three hours away. I stayed there for two weeks before finding my own apartment in the same town. Mark called me constantly at first demanding that I come back. He would switch between apologizing and threatening me. He said he would take Emma away from me and that no court would give custody to someone as unstable as me. He called me crazy and said I was overreacting to normal relationship problems. After a few months, Mark started showing up at my new apartment uninvited which he found through some snake friends who I have cut off.

He would bang on the door and yell for me to let him see his daughter. My neighbor started complaining about the noise. One time he showed up at 2 a.m. completely drunk and wouldn't leave until I threatened to call the police. I finally got a restraining order against him when Emma was eight months old. Mark followed the restraining order for about six months. Then he started testing the boundaries. He would drive slowly past my apartment building. He would show up at the grocery store when I was there with Emma even though it was across town from where he lived. He never technically violated the restraining order, but it was clear he was watching me. When Emma was around one and few months old, I decided to let Mark see her again because I felt guilty about

keeping a father from his child. I thought maybe he had learned his lesson and would be different. I agreed to supervised visits at a family center downtown. Mark seemed calm during the first few visits. He would bring toys for Emma and tried to make her laugh. But after the fourth visit he started getting angry again. Mark complained that the supervised visits weren't real parenting. He said I was trying to control him and make him look bad in front of the social worker. He demanded that I let him take Emma to his apartment alone. When I said no, he started yelling at me in the parking lot of the family center. He called me a vindictive bitch and said I was using Emma to punish him.

The social worker had to come outside and calm him down. During the next visit Mark seemed different. He barely interacted with Emma and spent most of the time staring at me with this angry look on his face. When the visit was over, he followed me to my car. He stood right behind me while I was putting Emma in her car seat and whispered in my ear that he knew where I lived and that I couldn't hide from him forever. His breath smelled like alcohol even though it was 2 p.m. on a Tuesday. That was the last time Mark saw Emma.

She was one and a half years old. I stopped the supervised visits immediately and told the family center what happened. I never heard from Mark again after that. No phone calls, no showing up places, nothing. It was like he just disappeared from our lives. For the past six years it's been just me and Emma. I've worked hard to build a stable life for us. Emma doesn't remember Mark at all.

Two weeks ago I got a letter in the mail from Mark. I almost threw it away without reading it, but curiosity got the better of me. In the letter Mark says he's found God and joined a church. He says he's been sober for three years. years and has been working with a counselor to deal with his anger issues. He admits that he was abusive and says he takes full responsibility for his actions. He wants to make amends and be part of Emma's life again. The letter goes on to say that he understands if I don't trust him right away. He suggests starting with supervised visits again and says he's willing to do whatever it takes

to prove he's changed. He included his phone number and asked me to call him so we can discuss how to move forward. At the end of the letter he wrote that Emma deserves to know her father and that keeping them apart is hurting both of them. I haven't responded to the letter and I don't plan to. Mark had his chance to be a father and he chose violence instead. Emma doesn't need that kind of chaos in her life. She's doing perfectly fine without him and I'm not going to risk her safety or emotional well-being because Mark suddenly decided he wants to play dad. But now I'm second-guessing myself. Some of my friends think I should at least consider letting Mark back into Emma's life since he says he's changed. They point out that it's been six years and people can grow and change in that time.

They also say that Emma has a right to know her father and that I shouldn't make that decision for her. My sister thinks I'm doing the right thing by protecting Emma. She was there when I showed up at her house with a split lip and a terrified baby. She remembers how scared I was and how Mark's threats affected me for years. She says that abusive men don't really change and that Mark is probably just manipulating me again. I keep going back and forth in my head. So I'd offer refusing to let my abusive ex see our daughter after he suddenly found God

and wants to make things right eight years later? Update 1 Thank you to everyone who responded to my original post. I got hundreds of comments and messages and I've been trying to read through all of them. The overwhelming majority of you told me to keep Mark away from Emma. and I really appreciate the support. A lot of people asked about the restraining order and whether it's still active.

To clarify, the restraining order expired after two years and I never renewed it because Mark had stopped bothering us. Some people suggested getting a new one but since he only sent a letter and hasn't shown up anywhere, I don't think I have grounds for that right now. Several people asked about my support system and whether I have family nearby. My sister lives about an hour away

and we see each other regularly. Emma loves her aunt and has a close relationship with her. My parents live in another state, but they visit a few times a year and Emma knows them well. I also have a good group of friends from work in Emma's school activities. Some people question whether it's fair to Emma to keep her from knowing her father. I want to be clear about something I didn't mention in my original post. Emma has never asked to meet Mark or expressed any curiosity about him beyond basic questions

like why some kids have dads and she doesn't. When I explain that her father wasn't ready to be a parent, she accepts that answer and moves on to talking about something else. She's not sitting around feeling sad about missing out on a father figure. A few people suggested that I should at least respond to Mark's letter to tell him no instead of just ignoring it. I thought about this a lot after reading the comments. While I do agree that I should be direct instead of leaving him wondering, but I still do

remembers how any contact with Mark in the past led to him pushing for more. When I let him back in for supervised visits, he immediately started demanding unsupervised time. I'm worried that responding to his letter will give him hope and encourage him to keep trying. I should also mention something else that I didn't include in my original post because I wasn't sure if it was relevant. About four years ago, I started dating someone new. His name is James and he's been incredibly patient and understanding about my past. Emma really likes him and he's been a positive male figure in her life. James has never pushed to be called dad or tried to replace Mark. He just treats Emma with kindness and respect. Having James around has made me realize even more

how toxic and destructive Mark was. After reading all your comments and thinking about it for weeks I've made my decision. I'm not going to respond to Mark's letter and I'm not going to let him back into Emma's life. You are right that he had his chance and he chose to be violent instead of being a father. Emma is happy and well-adjusted and I'm not going to risk changing that. Thank you for helping me see that protecting my daughter is more important than giving Mark another chance he doesn't deserve. Update 2. Hi everyone. Thank you for all the support on my previous posts. It's been about two months since my last update and unfortunately things have gotten more complicated. After I decided not to respond to Mark's I thought that would be the end of it. I was wrong. Three weeks after my last update I got

another letter from Mark. This one was longer and more demanding. He said he knew I got his first letter because he sent it certified mail and saw that it was delivered. He was upset that I didn't respond and said my silence was proof that I was still trying to punish him. In the second letter Mark wrote that he had been patient but his patience was running out. He said he had legal rights as Emma's father and that he would go to court if necessary. He claimed that keeping Emma from him was parental alienation and that he could use that against me in a custody battle. The tone of the letter was much more aggressive than the first one. I decided I needed to talk to a lawyer after getting the second letter. I made an appointment with a family law attorney and brought both letters

with me. The lawyer looked over everything and explained that Mark does have parental rights since he's on Emma's birth certificate. However, she said that his history of domestic violence and abandonment would work in my favor if he tried to take me to court. The lawyer suggested that I document everything in case Mark does file for custody or visitation. She told me to keep copies of both letters and to write down my memories of the abuse with as much detail as possible including dates if I could remember them. She also said I should gather any evidence I still have like medical records from when I went to the emergency room or photos of injuries. I spent the next week writing down everything I could remember about Mark's abuse.

It was harder than I expected. I hadn't thought about some of those incidents in years and reliving them brought back a lot of bad feelings. James was really supportive during this time and helped me get through the difficult memories. Two weeks after my meeting with the lawyer I got a third letter from Mark. This one was completely different from the first two. He was apologetic again and said he was sorry for the demanding tone of his second letter. He claimed that his counselor told him he was approaching the situation wrong and that he needed to be more patient. He asked again for a chance to prove he had changed and suggested starting with phone calls or video chats instead of in-person visits.

At this point I realized that Mark wasn't going to give up just because I ignored him. I decided to take my lawyer's advice and send him a response through her office. The letter was brief and formal. It stated that I would not be allowing any contact between Mark and Emma, based on his history of domestic violence and abandonment. It also warned him that any further attempts to contact me would be considered harassment. Mark waited exactly one week before responding. His fourth letter was the angriest one yet.

He called me vindictive and selfish. He said I was brainwashing Emma against him and that I would pay for keeping them apart. He wrote that he knew where I worked and where Emma went to school. The letter ended with him saying that he would find a way to see his daughter whether I liked it or not. That letter scared me enough that I went straight to the police station. The officer I spoke with said that while the letter was concerning it didn't contain specific enough threats to qualify as criminal harassment. He suggested that I document everything and call them immediately if Mark showed up anywhere. He also recommended that I contact Emma's

school to let them know about the situation. I called Emma's school the next day and spoke with the principal. I explained the situation and provided her with a full. photo of Mark. I told her that under no circumstances should Emma be released to anyone other than me, James, or my sister. The principal was very understanding and said they would put a note in Emma's file and inform all of her teachers. A week later, Mark sent his fifth letter. This one contained copies of legal documents. He had filed a petition for custody and visitation rights. The court date was set for six weeks away. Along with the legal papers, he included. He included included a note saying that he tried to do this the easy way, but I forced him to involve the courts.

I immediately contacted my lawyer and scheduled a meeting. She reviewed the petition and said that Mark was asking for joint custody and unsupervised visitation every other weekend. She explained that while his case was weak due to his history, the courts generally favor reuniting children with both parents when possible. My lawyer started preparing our defense right away. She helped me organize all the documentation I had gathered and connected me with a counselor who specializes in domestic violence cases. The counselor would be able to testify about the long-term effects of abuse and why it would be harmful for Emma to have contact with Mark. During this whole process I had to decide whether to tell Emma what was happening. She had noticed that I was stressed and asked several times if everything was okay.

I didn't want to worry her, but I also thought she should know in case Mark tried to approach her at school or somewhere else. I sat her down and explained in simple terms that her father wanted to see her but that I didn't think it was safe. Emma asked a few questions but seemed to accept what I told her. Thank you for reading this long update. Edit. The court hearing was last week. Mark showed up with his own lawyer and a folder full of character references from people at his church. He had also completed anger management classes and had three years of sobriety documented. When it was his turn to speak, he cried and talked about how much he regretted his past actions. He said he had found God and become a new person.

My lawyer presented all the evidence, including the letters of Mark's abuse, including the medical records from when I went to the emergency room. She also had the documentation from the Family Center about his behavior during the supervised visits around six years ago. The counselor testified about the potential harm to Emma from having contact with an abusive parent. The judge listened to everything and said she would issue her decision within two weeks. She acknowledged that Mark appeared to have made positive changes in his life, but also expressed serious concerns about his history of violence. She said that Emma's safety and well-being were her primary considerations. Then I got the judge's decision yesterday.

Mark was granted supervised within Citation for two hours every other Saturday at a court-approved facility. The visits will be monitored by a social work. and Mark will have to pay for the supervision costs. The judge also ordered that Mark continue with counseling and anger management classes. She said the arrangement would be reviewed in six months and could be modified based on how the visits go. I'm devastated by this decision. I know it could have been worse and that Mark could have gotten unsupervised visits or even joint custody. But I still feel like I failed to

protect Emma. She's going to have to deal with this man who hurt us both and there's nothing I can do to stop it. The first supervised visit is scheduled for this Saturday. I have to bring Emma to to the family center and leave her there with Mark for two hours. I don't know how I'm going to get through it. Emma seems nervous but not terrified. I think she doesn't fully understand what's happening. I know a lot of you warned me that the courts often side with both parents regardless of their history. You were right and I wish I had been better prepared for this outcome. Update 3. Hi everyone, it's been four months since my last update and I wanted to let you know how things have been going with the supervised visits. Unfortunately, everything has gotten much worse than I expected.

The first visit went okay according to the social worker. Emma was quiet and shy, but she didn't cry or asked to leave early. Mark brought coloring books and tried to get her to talk about school. The social worker said Emma seemed confused about who Mark was, but she was polite. When I picked her up Emma asked why the man said he was her daddy when she thought James was more like a daddy to her. The second visit was harder. Emma cried when I dropped her off and said she didn't want to go. I had to carry her into the building while she begged me not to leave her there. The social worker said Emma spent most of the visits sitting in the corner and wouldn't interact

with Mark. When he tried to sit next to her, she moved away. Mark got frustrated and raised his voice, which made Emma cry harder. By the fourth visit Emma was having nightmares and wetting the bed again. She would start getting anxious every Friday night because she knew she had to see Mark the next day. She began asking me why she had to spend time with someone who made her feel scared. I didn't know how to answer that question. Mark started complaining to the social worker that Emma was being coached to reject him.

He said I was clearly talking bad about him at home and poisoning her against him. The social worker explained that Emma's behavior was normal for a child meeting a parent for the first time, but Mark didn't want to hear it. He demanded that the social worker talked to me about my attitude. During the sixth visit, something happened that changed everything. Mark got angry when Emma wouldn't hug him goodbye. The social worker said he grabbed Emma's arm and pulled her toward him while telling her that daddies deserve hugs from their little girls. Emma started screaming and tried to pull away, but Mark held on tighter. The social worker had to physically intervene to get Mark to let go of Emma.

When I arrived to pick up Emma, she was still crying and had read marks on her arm where Mark had grabbed her. The social worker took photos of the marks and filed an incident report. Emma was so upset that she threw up in the car on the way that night she crawled into my bed and said she never wanted to see the mean man again. I called my lawyer immediately and she filed an emergency motion to suspend the visits. We had to wait three days for a hearing which were the longest three days of my life. Emma barely slept and kept asking if she had to go back to see Mark. I tried to reassure her but I wasn't sure myself what the judge would decide.

At the emergency hearing the social worker testified about what happened during the sixth visit. She showed the photos of the marks on Emma's arm and explained that Mark's behavior was concerning. Mark's lawyer argued that it was just a misunderstanding and that Mark was frustrated because Emma was rejecting his affection. The judge was clearly disturbed by what she heard. She suspended the visits immediately pending a full review. She also ordered that Mark undergo a psychological evaluation before any future visits could be considered. Mark started yelling at the judge and said the whole system was rigged against fathers. His lawyer had to calm him down before he was held in contempt of court. For the past three months there have been no visits while Mark completes his psychological evaluation.

Emma has slowly started sleeping better and the nightmares have mostly stopped. She still gets anxious sometimes and asks if the mean man is coming back. I keep telling her that she's safe, but I don't know if that's really true. Two weeks ago my lawyer called with bad news. Mark's psychological evaluation was completed and while it noted some concerning behaviors it didn't recommend terminating his parental rights. The psychologist said that Mark has anger management issues and difficulty regulatory. his emotions, but that he could potentially have supervised visits if he completes additional therapy.

Mark's lawyer has filed a motion to resume the visits with increased supervision. They want two social workers present instead of one and they've agreed to shorter visits of only one hour. The hearing is scheduled for next month. I'm terrified that the judge will allow the visits to start again. Emma has been through enough trauma and I can't bear the thought of putting her through more. She's still just a little girl who shouldn't have to deal with any of this. James has been amazing through all of this. He's talked about adopting Emma if Mark's rights are ever terminated, but that seems unlikely to happen. James treats Emma like she's his own daughter and she clearly sees him as her father figure.

It breaks my heart that the courts are forcing her to have a relationship with someone who scares her while ignoring the man who actually loves and cares for her. The worst part is that Mark seems to be getting more aggressive instead of better. He started sending me text messages even though he's not supposed to contact me directly. The messages aren't threatening enough for the police to do anything, but they're clearly meant to intimidate me. He writes things like he knows the truth will come out eventually and that Emma will see who the real villain is. I've also noticed Mark driving past Emma's school a few times when I'm picking her up.

He doesn't stop or get out of his car, but I can see him watching him. us. I've reported this to the police, but they say he's not technically doing anything illegal since it's a public street. My lawyer says we need to document everything and hope that Mark makes a bigger mistake that gives us grounds to terminate his rights completely. But I hate that we're basically waiting for him to hurt Emma worse before the system will protect her. It feels like we're sacrificing my daughter's well-being to preserve some theoretical father's writes. Emma asked me yesterday if we could move far away where the mean man can't find us. I had to explain that we can't do that because of the court order. She didn't understand why a

judge would make her spend time with someone who hurt her. I didn't know how to explain it because I don't understand it either. I'm sharing this update because I want people to know that the family court system doesn't always protect children like everyone says it does. Sometimes it forces kids into dangerous situations because of outdated ideas about rights. Emma is paying the price for adult decisions that she had no part in making. The hearing next month will determine whether Emma has to start seeing Mark again. I'm preparing for the worst while hoping for the best. Thank you to everyone who has followed our story and offered support.