Reddit Stories - PARTNER of half a year BECAME very angry when I didn't INCLUDE him

Episode Date: March 18, 2026

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #relationshipadvice #couples #communication #emotions #boundariesSummary: After six months of dating, my partner became extremely upset when I didn't include him in a personal decision. His reaction surprised me, as I believed I had the right to make choices independently. This incident raised questions about our communication and boundaries within the relationship.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, relationship, partner, anger, communication, boundaries, emotions, personaldecision, datingadvice, coupleissues, conflictresolution, feelings, trust, expectations, advice, supportBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6816713/support.This episode includes AI-generated content.

I hope you enjoy this story. Partner of half a year became very angry when I didn't include him in the guest list for my closest pal's marriage ceremony, accused me of being unfaithful, attempted to seize me, and had his acquaintance insult me. I, 25F, have been seeing my now boyfriend, 27M, who will call Joe, for about six months now. We made it official three months into dating, so I like to say he's only officially been my boyfriend for three months. My best friend, who will call and, is getting married next month. I'm one of her bridesmaids. It's a small destination wedding, only about 40 close friends the bridal party is set to arrive

about four days before the actual wedding to do bachelor-slash-bachelorette stuff. The issue came up yesterday morning when my boyfriend started asking what time my flight was for the wedding week. I didn't think much of it and told him. He came back about 10 minutes later and said he'd have to go on a different flight, because he couldn't find one on the same airline or at the same time. I didn't understand why he was looking at flights. I asked him if he was planning on going on a solo or or guy's trip while I was gone since I wouldn't be around. He looked confused and then said

he was looking for flights for the wedding. I then proceeded to tell him, trying to be as gentle as possible, that I wasn't planning on a plus one and the guest list was already finalized. He has only ever met an over-face time since she lives in a different state from us. After telling him, he exploded at me. Honestly, it was a total 180 from his usual behavior. He said it was insensitive of me to not ask for A plus one because we've been together for so long now, that I was purposefully excluding him and trying to keep him a secret.

He ranted and talked in a circle and I just sat there in shock. What snapped me out of the days was when he insinuated that I would likely cheat with one of the groom's men. That's when I got up, got my shit, and started walking out of his place. He freaked out even more and said we needed to talk about this and I couldn't walk out on him. He tried to grab me twice, but I shoved him off. Since I last night, I haven't spoken to him. He's been blowing up my phone with calls and texts that I don't reply to. Even put him on Do Not Disturb because it was so annoying. I was pretty solid in believing I wasn't T.A. but one of his

best friends got my number and texted me I was being petty and a female dog about everything. that I lead Joe on for six months. I haven't talked to anyone about this since I wanted to cool down before I got a second opinion. But now that his friend is texting men, I feel like I handled it all poorly. I know I need space right now, but I don't want to ghost Joe, which his friend implied I'm now doing. So I've come here to get some unbiased opinions. Fellow Redditors, I asked you now if I am TA for not having my boyfriend be a plus one to my best friend's wedding. Edit, to clarify, we don't live together.

I just spend the night at his place sometimes. Edit 2, in our last conversation last night I texted him that I needed some space to breathe to which he then just kept calling and texting. Edit 3, because people keep acting like Joe is a secret, he has met my other friends. He hasn't met an in-person because she lives in a different state. Across the country to be exact. They've only met through FaceTime. I've met his parents and friends. He hasn't met mine because they moved back to Mexico two years ago.

He has met them over FaceTime. Edit 4, his friends saying lead him on was leading him to believe he was invited comments. Upp to multiple comments on why she is not having her boyfriend as her plus one to the wedding. I accepted the wedding invite long before we met. This wedding invite didn't just recently happen. The most main reason for why I never asked for a plus one is because Joe and I had only just started seeing each other when the wedding was being planned. A lot went into it because it's a destination wedding in Europe Plus I'm not meaning to dismiss

it. I'm pointing out that's why I'm not having a plus one unlike the other groomsmen and bridesmaids. They have been with their partners for years and personally no-an. Joe has only ever met her over FaceTime Plus also there's a lot more than just buying a ticket. I said earlier that this wedding was planned months before we met, and planned a lot of things for this wedding that are catered to the fact there's a limited guest list. Again.

I would have been fine to explain all this but again. I never got a chance to plus this wedding wasn't a secret. He was even aware of it when we first started seeing each other because I'd just done dress shopping. Again. This wedding was very planned out because it is indeed very small and private in France. He's also met Anne and her fiancé over FaceTime. Not in person because she's in a different state.

He's met my other friends as well. He hasn't met my parents because they live in a different country. Chibi underscore Beaver. NTA. I don't think three months is a long enough time frame to include someone as a plus one to a wedding, especially one with such a small guest list. This episode is brought to you by Spreaker, The platform responsible for a rapidly spreading condition known as podcast brain.

Symptoms include buying microphones you don't need, explaining RSS feeds to confused relatives, and saying things like, sorry, I can't talk right now, I'm editing audio. If this sounds familiar, you're probably already a podcaster. The good news is Sprinker makes the whole process simple. You record your show, upload it once, and Sprinker distributes it everywhere people listen, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and about a dozen apps your cousin's swears are the next big thing. Even better, Spreaker helps you monetize your show with ads, meaning your podcast might someday pay for, well, more microphones. Start your show today at spreeker.com. Spreaker, because if you're

going to talk to yourself for an hour, you might as well publish it. If it was a wedding close by that's different, but destination weddings objectively take more planning and throwing and a last minute guest might irritate the bride and groom. His reaction is definitely a massive red flag, although I do think you should have discussed this with him beforehand and explained the reasoning. Country Boy 1101 From what you wrote above I would say Antiae. Since it has only been six months of dating, I expect that you were just started dating when the wedding invites came out and the RSVP

was made that you were a party of one. If his name was not on the original wedding invite and you did not ask for him to be added, then he is not invited to the wedding. I would say his reaction would be a huge red flag for me and am accusing you of using this away time to cheat would be a deal breaker for me after only six months. I would call him and tell him that his reaction was a deal breaker, and it would be best to end the relationship now and move on. Update, the general consensus was that I wasn't TA. Unfortunately, the original post got taken down on the main IDA sub but is still up on the other. Still posting the update on both, though.

Some of y'all had some stuff to say about me saying I need help communicating because I shouldn't have walked out. Have your opinions, but never let someone scream at you and just sit there and take it. I'm realizing that's emotional abuse. About why I never pushed to have a plus one. When the wedding planning was starting, Joe and I had not met. By the time we met and made things official, the wedding planning was finalized. I never hid the wedding from Joe or the fact it was very small. someone said most normal people plan on bringing their sow to a wedding. Maybe that's true. But never automatically assume that since your sow is invited to something, you'll be going too. The wedding was heavily pre-planned because again, it's a destination wedding.

And is originally from France and primary reason why it's a destination wedding. I talked to and about this shortly after posting and she agreed that I'm not TA. She said if the roles were reversed, she'd never expect to. or so of less than a year be invited to an important event. So, on Friday, I texted Joe asking to meet up Saturday morning to have a discussion about everything. This morning he tried to get us to meet at my place, but instead, I got him to agree to meet at a local cafe. A lot of you brought up how he tried to grab me and that's a big sign that he could get more physical in the future. I didn't want anything to be left to chance. He got there early and tried to hug me, which I didn't

allow. I got the ick at the thought of him hugging me. We did a bit of small talk but got pretty much to the point once we sat down. He did apologize for blowing up, but in the same breath said I shouldn't have left. I countered that he shouldn't have tried to physically stop me from leaving, twice. He said what else was he supposed to do? That set the tone for the whole conversation. He went on to say me just walking away was a clear indication that I didn't respect him. I then pointed out that he was not letting me explain why he wasn't invited. This is when we started talking in circles. I told him how the wedding was being planned long before we met. How by the time we mutually agreed to be exclusive, they had everything finalized, especially the guest list.

He said I should have asked for and to change it anyway. I asked him if I ever gave him the impression he'd be attending. He was silent for a while and then admitted he just assumed that since he was now my boyfriend, I would have told and to invite me. I told him then wouldn't I have said something if he was invited in the past three months? I realized that we weren't getting anywhere. I told him I wanted to break up. To paraphrase, I said something along the lines of. I understand you were hurt that I didn't invite you. I am sorry that we didn't have a clearer conversation. I do wish that we could have had a calmer conversation. However, I don't feel safe in this relationship because of of how you reacted. I don't think this relationship is good for either of us if you feel

betrayed and I feel unsafe. He didn't take that well. Joe's response was if we broke up, I wasn't getting my stuff back. I told him I didn't care. Because honestly, if he wants to keep some of my underwear and use toothbrush, okay. I then asked him to not have his friends text me too. He then went from pleading to have another chance to accusing me of never wanting him. I just stood up, told him I wished him the best, and left, ended up going for a two-hour run when I got home because I still felt stressed. Blocked his number, his friends, blocked his Instagram, deleted the pictures of us on my feed, changed my Facebook status to single.

Had a cry and have been watching Netflix since. Something I learned from this your first fight with your partner tells you everything about them. Our first fight told me Joe was explosive. Maybe if he hadn't blown up, we would still be together. Not going to dwell on it, though. I know it's good I got out while you can because, as a lot of you pointed out, the fact he kept trying to overpower me twice as a lot.

This episode is brought to you by Sprecker, the platform responsible for a rapidly spreading condition known as podcast brain. Symptoms include buying microphones you don't need, explaining RSS feeds to confused relatives, and saying things like, Sorry, I can't talk right now, I'm editing audio. If this sounds familiar, you're probably already a podcaster. The good news is Spreaker makes the whole process simple.

You record your show, upload it once, and Spreaker distributes it everywhere people listen. Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and about a dozen apps your cousins swears are the next big thing. Even better, Spreaker helps you monetize your show with ads, meaning your podcast might someday pay for, well, more microphones. Start your show today at spreeker.com. Sprinker. because if you're going to talk to yourself for an hour, you might as well publish it. I'm honestly glad I broke it off. As some of you said, it took him six months to show his true colors.

Can't imagine if he did come and then a year later, I find out he's like this and have to look at wedding photos with a guy who is fine blowing up. I'm going to stay single for a while now. I have a wedding to look forward to. My focus is on supporting Anne and making sure she has the best wedding ever. I may update when the wedding happens to let you guys know how it goes and if Joe tried anything else. Thank you again to everyone for their opinions. Comments, patch and, don't forget to always see who is at your door before you open it. Keep yourself safe. Good for you, darling. Have a wonderful time at the wedding.

Congrats to Anne. Hope they have a long marriage with no crazy. I'm dying RN-123 op. Thank you I do have a dog and a roommate so that's some extra security already. The roommate and I talked before about getting a ring camera but this experience and other comments have solidified us getting one. Beneficial knows 54-47. I have to say I'm proud of you. And this is why I say this is what dating is for. This is the interview process and so as you was going along with it, you seem he wasn't the

candidate for you and you cut him loose. Good for you. all the other people are going to say, you know, the naysayers listen, they just want somebody by their side to say they love them because they have no self-love or self-esteem for their internal selves. That's all their opinions and stuff lack of love and lack of self-esteem. Have fun at the wedding have a hookup if you want, but have fun. Adventurous underscore CHIP 9036 NTA. Normal people don't blow up on their significant other because of an assumption. icing on the cake was him accusing you of playing him the whole time because you told him you felt unsafe. I'd how to explain it but all I know is all signs point to him being a narcissistic manipulator. I get people losing their temper and I can be pretty forgiving, but one, trying to

grab someone, no, and two, doubling down. That's when someone shows who they really are. We all have bad moments. It's how we react after those bad moments. It's how we react after those bad moments. that makes us who we really are. This guy is a giant walking red flag. Ninja Baba Mama, and having his friends harass her through texts. Sun Moon Truth, calling her a female dog? She seems to have stumbled upon a nest of Incels. Waffles 0206.

I had a destination wedding. My save the dates were sent out about 18 months in advance, invites a year in advance, and my guest list was fully finalized at least six months out as everyone who was attending had booked their flights. Two of my bridesmaids got into new relationships around a few months out from my wedding. They never asked me for a plus one and their partners never took issue with it. In fact, those two bridesmaids ended traveling for several weeks together after the wedding. Sorry but destination weddings take time to plan, people can't just decide to attend last minute. Upp totally did the right thing. He was a walking red flag with his reaction.

Additional meeting underscore 2. There is a reason why only married couples always have to be invited and engaged couples if they have been for a while. It's really hard to keep up with other people's relationships and people often break up or start dating between sending invites and the wedding. I mean these days it's more blurred because people live together before marriage long times. And some just have money and can give plus ones to everyone. But not everyone needs a invite because they are dating. Now on to the next story. Story 2.

Hired a private investigator and caught my fiancé cheating with her boss weeks before our over-budget dream wedding, so I got her fired and dodged a financial bullet. When I, 27 male, met my fiancé, 25 female, for years ago, I knew right away that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. She was everything that I had been looking for. We'd only been dating for a year when I proposed. We've been engaged for three years. The long engagement has caused some trouble for us.

One of the biggest issues is that she wanted to plan her dream wedding, which subsequently would cost us quite a bit of money. I've never been one to care about superficial things like that. I would be more than happy going to the courthouse, signing some papers, then spending all of the wedding money on our honeymoon. However, she had always dreamt of her big day and she wanted a big wedding with no compromise. It felt like every other week the budget we set aside for the wedding had increased or she was telling me that she had gone over and was apologizing for it. At some point, I noticed that her

apologies were meaningless because she continued to go over. We were getting into a lot of arguments and there was a bit of resentment brewing between us. I'd had enough of her constant disregard for the financial constraints of the wedding, so I sat her down in tending. to have a calm, reasonable conversation with her. She was immediately very defensive and told me that she wasn't sure if she could be with someone who was controlling. I was upset that she had accused me of being controlling when all I was doing was standing up for myself when she was taking advantage of me. After the fight, she ended up leaving and staying at her friend's house for a week while we figured things out. Honestly, I thought it might have been the end for us. I was heartbroken.

She was my dream girl and I cared so much about her. She eventually came back and we had a long discussion about the wedding. We both agreed that we still wanted to be together, but we needed to set some boundaries. We also agreed that we would move forward with what we had for the wedding and halt all further planning. That was the only compromise on the issue I would allow since we were already over budget by 50% and had 150 people invited. We fell back into our old patterns with each other and it seemed like our temporary break and discussion actually helped our relationship. The wedding was only a few months away and we were doing well. As we got closer to the wedding date, some of the stressors started to come back for us.

My fiancé's coping mechanism with the stress was to throw herself into her work. She's a graphic designer and very creatively inclined, so it helped alleviate the stress. So, instead of being home with me, she was at work. She started spending more and more time at work. It felt avoidant, which was unlike her. I was curious about why she was there so much, so I asked her one night when she came home. She just told me that it was a good way to escape and forget about all of it. I didn't understand why she still wanted to go through with the huge wedding if it was

stressing her out so much, but I didn't ask about that. Around the same time, I noticed that she was wearing more makeup and more revealing clothes to work. This episode is brought to you by Spreaker, the platform responsible for a rapidly spreading condition known as podcast brain. Symptoms include buying microphones you don't need, explaining RSS feeds to confused relatives, and saying things like, sorry, I can't talk right now, I'm editing audio.

If this sounds familiar, you're probably already a podcaster. The good news is Spreaker makes the whole process simple. You record your show, upload it once, and Spreaker distributes it everywhere people listen, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, in about a dozen apps your cousin's swears are the next big thing. Even better, Spreaker helps you monitor your show with ads, meaning your podcast might someday pay for, well, more microphones.

Start your show today at spreeker.com. Sprinker, because if you're going to talk to yourself for an hour, you might as well publish it. I had nothing against her dressing in a way that she felt confident, but she normally wore long pants, boots, and sweaters to work because she was always complaining about how cold she was while she was there. Suddenly, she was wearing sleeveless blouses showing cleavage and skirts. It was odd. I tried not to worry about it, but honestly, I've seen a ton of those in my The Jerk videos and stories exposing cheaters. So a lot of the things she was doing were raising red flags for me. I needed to find out if something was going on before the wedding. I didn't want to

be married to her and then find out she was with an ex or something after we were legally attached. I did some snooping on my own, but didn't find anything. One thing I've always known about liars is that they're good at hiding their lies. So, I justified hiring a private investigator to follow her. I reached out to someone who specializes in infidelity and they agreed to take the case. I could only afford to pay them for a few days because the wedding was depleting a lot of my savings. The first day, they didn't find anything. She went to work and went home with no issue. I thought that maybe I was overreacting, but my gut told me not to call the private investigator off. The next day, I was glad I trusted my gut. My fiancé texted me about midway through the day

that she would be staying late at the office. She said that she was helping a coworker with some excess work they had before a due date. However, the evidence the private investigator brought back to me told a different story. They emailed me over a file with videos and pictures of my girlfriend with her boss in his office. They were having sex right on his desk, while other employees were in the office. I just remember staring at the computer screen until it turned itself off. I was so shocked by what I saw. When I collected myself, I started to think about my options. There was absolutely no chance I was going through with the wedding. But I needed to figure out how to end it. I wanted a little revenge on her for cheating on me. An idea hit me, so before I acted on it, I packed up some of my

stuff and texted my brother to see if I could stay with him. When I got to his house, I drafted an email to our entire wedding guest list. In the email, I told them all it was cancelled and attached the evidence of my fiancé's affair. Surprisingly, I got several responses back from relatives, co-workers, and friends about it. What surprised me the most, which I didn't even realize at the time, was that my fiancé's hour manager was on the list. She reached out to me and asked about details because it was something she was obligated to act on because it was clearly on company property. I told her everything I knew. My fiancé figured out I was with my brother and came to his house, banging on the door. She was fuming at me, but I stood my ground and ended it. I told her I was

contacting the venue, vendors, and everyone else involved in the wedding and having all of my money refunded to me. I felt bad when she was crying in front of me, but then I remembered how she cheated on me and I didn't anymore. She and her boss were both fired for their inappropriate on the job. She tried to call me and tell me that I was still obligated to pay for the apartment even though I didn't live there, but I managed to work something out with the apartment complex to pay for one month and get off the lease. I think they were just willing to work with me because of the situation. My now ex-fiancee was forced to move out because she lost her job and couldn't afford rent on her own because she dumped what little she had in savings into a wedding that never

happened.