Reddit Stories - Revealed my SIBLING'S INFIDELITY to their spouse, leading to my EXCLUSION from the

Episode Date: February 7, 2026

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #infidelity #familydrama #betrayal #relationships #secrets  Summary: I discovered my sibling's infidelity and felt compelled to reveal it to their spouse. This decision, while morally driven, resulted in my exclusion from family gatherings and strained relationships. The fallout has been challenging, leaving me questioning my actions and the impact of honesty on familial bonds.  Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, infidelity, family, betrayal, relationships, secrets, honesty, consequences, moral dilemmas, sibling rivalry, trust, communication, family dynamics, emotional fallout, personal stories, life lessons, conflict resolutionBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6816713/support.This episode includes AI-generated content.

Episode with two stories, first part. I hope you enjoy this story. Revealed my siblings' infidelity to their spouse, leading to my exclusion from the family for disrupting their relationship. Despite being the one who strayed and showing no interest in caring for their children. Daughter. So my older brother, 33M, has been married to his wife, let's call her Molly, 32, female, for five years. They have a two-year-old daughter together too. Recently, I found out that my brother had been cheating on Molly with a friend of mine. My friend was the one who confessed to me because she couldn't do this anymore and was

racked with guilt and I cut her off immediately once I had all the proof that I needed. There were hundreds of screenshots to prove that he was having an affair and it had been going on for almost a year, ever since they met at my birthday party last year. My brother and I have been best friends so I was quite shocked when I found out about his affair. I was disgusted that he'd been getting up to no good behind his wife's back because, in my opinion, that's how scumbags behave and my brother wasn't supposed to be one. Molly was a nice girl and she deserved better, so I knew that she had to know about this. After that, even if she left him, it would be her call.

About a week ago, I confronted my brother about this and told him that he needed to come clean to his wife. I invited him over to my house and told him that I knew all about the affair and I wanted him to tell his wife the truth since she deserved to know. She had given him a wonderful life and a beautiful daughter, the least that he could do for her after everything, was tell her the truth himself. He tried to deny it at first, but I already had all the screenshots and I showed him so that he wouldn't waste more of our time trying to deny it. And then he started sobbing uncontrollably and tried to tell me that he didn't mean for it to happen. It just started off as harmless flirting but then they were just going really hot and heavy all of a sudden, and he couldn't control himself. I was disgusted,

because I never expected my brother, of all people, to turn out to be a cheater. I let him cry for a little while, but then, I told him that regardless of whatever had happened, he had to tell Molly the truth. So then he started begging me not to make him do that because that would ruin his life. He said that Molly would leave him if he told her the truth and he really loved her and he couldn't live without her. I told him that he should have thought about that before he started having an affair with a friend of mine and he didn't, so that was all on him. I told him that if he didn't tell her the truth, then I most certainly would. He was pretty desperate and kept begging me to keep this a secret because he couldn't afford

to lose his family. He said that he would never do this again and was counting on me just to help him out once. I didn't make any promises, but after an hour of him just begging me to keep things quiet, I realized that he was not going to agree and I was tired of talking to him, so I told him to go back home. Let me just make it very clear once more that I did not make any promises to him and I didn't tell him that I was going to help him keep this a secret. A few days passed, and my brother and Molly were still posting pictures online and acting normally, so I figured out that he still

hadn't told her the truth. I decided to talk to Molly personally, I called her a few days after I met with my brother. We had a small talk before I got to the point where she was telling me that my brother was about to take them on a beach trip for the weekend and she was super excited about it. It was their five-year marriage anniversary and she said that he wanted to celebrate it in a big way, which is why they were going out. She was telling me how happy she was and I just couldn't take it, so I told her the truth and even sent her all the screenshots. I kept saying that I was really sorry that this was happening to her, but I wanted her to know because she needed to know the truth. She didn't say much at the time, only that she was thankful to me for letting

her know and then hung up. Later that day, I found out from my brother that she had left the house with their daughter and was nowhere to be found. He was panicking because he had tried to call her several times, but she wasn't responding and none of her friends would tell him where she was either. He asked me if I had told her anything about the affair, and I decided to be honest and told him that I had told her everything. And she knew the truth now since he had made it clear that he wasn't going to be honest with her. He started shouting at me and accused me of ruining his marriage

by sticking my nose where it didn't belong. He was completely hysterical and I couldn't handle that. So I disconnected the call and blocked him. Then yesterday, I found out that he had been served with divorce papers and apparently, Molly was also filing for full custody of their daughter. And since she was a psalm, she was also demanding an insane alimony along with the house and most of their assets. It was a crazy list of demands but honestly, I feel like my brother deserves this.

And it's very hard to feel bad for him, knowing that he cheated on her for a full year and it probably would have gone on longer if my friend didn't suddenly develop a conscience, end the affair, and come clean to me. He has been texting me relentlessly from different numbers, telling me that this is my fault and I need to do something to fix it. Because he cannot do without his family and I'm the reason his daughter might get taken away from him now. I have been ignoring him but it's getting more difficult to do that because now, a lot of other people are also involved. He told our parents about what I did and they believe that I screwed up. My parents and I spoke a couple of days back and they think that I overstepped by telling Molly about the affair.

They believe that it was not my place to tell her about it, no matter what my sense of morality told me. I was surprised that they were sticking up for my brother but they said that they were not okay with what he did. But despite that, they agreed that I had no business talking to Molly about something like this. And they think that I ruined three lives at once, not just my brothers but also Mollies and their daughters. The reason they said that was because they thought that Molly actually did love my brother more than he loved her. And if my brother had spoken to her himself then things might have gone over better and they probably could have worked on their marriage and stayed together somehow. There is no doubt about the fact that

their daughter would have greatly benefited from her parents staying together and working things out instead of just getting a divorce. That's what my parents believe and they strongly feel that if my brother had been given the opportunity to talk to Molly and tell her everything on his own terms, then the outcome could have been different. So a parent's Apparently, it kind of is my fault that they are now going to be heading towards a divorce. Needless to say, I don't agree with what my parents believe. I had given my brother a chance to tell Molly the truth he didn't do that and he was just going to lead her on.

I also hadn't promised my brother that I was going to help him keep this a secret, so he really shouldn't have expected me to stay quiet for long. I had made it very clear to him that I was going to tell her the truth if he didn't do it himself. And that's exactly what I did, so I think he had been given a little. a fair warning and a real chance to do the decent thing but he chose not to. I think it's quite unfair for everybody to blame me for his divorce when all I did was tell Molly the truth. Ida for telling my sister-in-law that my brother was cheating on her? Update 1. I have decided that I am going to now cut off my brother and the rest of my family.

Because in the past few days, everybody has shown their true colors to me. I can't believe that all of them are rallying for my brother and are actually defending a cheater. The mental gymnastics that's needed to defend my brother and make me the villain is just insane and I can't even believe that this is happening to me right now. Ever since he got served with a divorce, not just my parents but a lot of other relatives have also texted me to let me know that what I did was messed up and that they do not agree with how I dealt with the situation. They believed that I should have just stayed out of it because this was none of my business anyway and I had no right to go and talk to Molly about something so sensitive.

knowing that I held the power to ruin my brother's marriage and life. I should have been more careful and dealt with this a little more sensitively, or maybe shouldn't have dealt with it because it wasn't my place to do so. That's all that I have been hearing from everybody and it's getting really tiring. I am 100% sure that my brother never would have told Molly if it really came down to it and the lies just would have gone on endlessly. Also saying that I should have stayed out of this because it was not my business is pretty ridiculous because the woman that my brother cheated on his wife with happens to be a close friend of

mine. The only reason I ever even got to know about his infidelity was because I was friends with his affair partner, so to believe that I was going to stay away and not get involved as a ridiculous expectation. Everybody is so caught up in trying to get me to apologize to my brother for sticking my nose in his marriage. They have completely forgotten that none of this would have happened if he just stayed loyal to his wife. How hard could that possibly have been? Molly was a wonderful wife and a human being. Anybody with half a heart would not have been able to keep something like this to themselves. She and I always got along really well in that day. When I heard her talking about how excited she was for the beach trip and to celebrate her wedding anniversary with my brother,

I just couldn't help myself. She loved my brother and what he did to her was disgusting. Only the lowest of the low could cheat on their wife with a woman they barely even knew. Even after being with Molly for so long and having a daughter with her, my brother still went out of his way to cheat. And if he did it once, he might have also done it in the past or maybe he would do it again. So for Molly's sake, I had to let her know. She deserves better than this and I didn't care if it was my brother that I was selling out to protect someone who had no fault here. If he screwed up then that was completely on him and my family could try to somehow distort the facts and make me the bad guy, they could pat themselves on the back for it.

But I knew the truth and as long as I knew that I did what was right, I don't care what anybody else says about me. I stayed true to myself and I stood up for what I believe in, so screw them. Update 2, hi, so it's been two weeks since I blocked my family. I don't know what they've been up to and nobody has tried to contact me after I blocked them. Good riddance, honestly, I don't want to talk to anyone either. But recently, Molly got in touch with me and thanked me yet again for telling her the truth. She called me from a number that I didn't have saved, so I'm assuming that she changed her phone number after filing for the divorce.

She told me that she was now living in a spare apartment that belonged to a friend of hers. That friend didn't live here and only returned once a year, so it was a convenient arrangement for her now. My brother didn't know that address and neither did anyone else, so she was not too worried about him being able to find her. He had tried to contact her on her old number a couple of times, but she hadn't responded. She told me that she had been suspecting that maybe he wasn't being completely truthful with her for the last couple of months but never brought it up because she just thought that she was being paranoid. The day that I told her about the affair and sent her all those screenshots, she made up her mind that she was going to leave him that very moment and it didn't even take her more than an hour to pack her things up and go. She told me that she didn't even cry until she was out of that house. I felt really bad while she was telling me all of that and I apologized for what my brother did.

So she told me that I wasn't the one who needed to apologize to her, it was my brother. If anything, I'm the one who did the right thing by telling her the truth and probably the only decent person from my family because everybody else who had contacted her just wanted her to reconsider and go back to my brother. My parents had texted her and said that instead of running away from the problem and leaving my brother, she should stay with him and work things out. for the sake of their daughter, if not for the sake of my brother. And my brother had only been texting her to come back and begging her for forgiveness,

but he kept making it all about himself. All his texts were about how horrible he felt about what he did and how he wouldn't be able to survive without Molly and their daughter. He didn't even seem to care about how he had made her feel and that's what really sucked. We spoke on the phone for a little while more until she had to go and I wished her luck for the divorce proceedings. It was a nice conversation and I felt better about what I did, knowing that Molly was doing all right and so was my niece.

I guess that is exactly what I needed, some reassurance that I did the right thing and she was probably the best person to give me that validation. Update 3, hey, so 10 days have passed since my last update. From what I know, the divorce proceedings have already started. Molly's doing great and I've even visited my niece a couple of times, so it's going well. The only person that it's not going great for is my brother. My parents decided to start guilt-tripping me and started texting me from a new phone number, to let me know about my brother's miserable state.

Apparently, he has been drinking himself to sleep almost every night and has lost a lot of weight because he can't even bring himself to eat. They told me that he had dark circles under his eyes from a lack of sleep and even sent me a couple of photos to prove it. I feel bad for him, but I don't understand what this has to do with me. I mean, the divorce has already started. There's no turning back anymore. So he should probably be focusing on trying to make himself seem less of a jerk than he is so he doesn't lose everything, instead of trying to win me over and gain my sympathy. He hasn't reached out to me directly, but my parents keep talking to me and I really don't know what they expect me to do here.

I would have blocked them but I'm actually kind of curious as to where this might lead. It's been a few days since they started texting me and if they get to the point in the next couple of days, then it's great. But if they don't, then I will have to ask them myself and for that, I will have to reply to the messages. I'm already so tired thinking about the conversation that will take place next but I want to know what's going on. In case it's something helpful I can pass that information on to Molly. Yeah, I know a lot of you might be thinking that I have.

have no loyalty towards my family. But my brother wasn't loyal to his family either, so I guess it runs in the jeans. Update 4. So, three days after the last update and today, I finally responded to my parents and asked them point blank what they wanted me to do. Because I couldn't stop Molly from getting a divorce, that was already done now. That ship had failed and my parents, and also my brother, needed to accept it and move on. But they told me that that's not what they were texting, me about and they actually wanted me to talk to Molly and convince her to change her absurd list of demands. They said that she was demanding a lot and if my brother agreed to it, then he would lose everything that he had worked so hard for, including their house and both their cars. She was also

asking for a lot of money in the divorce settlement and the alimony and they wanted me to talk to Molly and tell her that it was a bad idea, and that she was going to ruin my brother's life if she went through with this. They knew that my brother didn't have a chance of ever getting away with what he did, especially since Molly's lawyer was one of the best. They couldn't defeat her legally, so they wanted me to talk to her and manipulate her into letting go of a couple of things. Because the mediation wasn't going according to plan and my brother was doing pretty badly on that front. So this was the only option that they had left and they knew that Molly and I were on good terms, so I was their only hope. They also mentioned that since I was the one who was

behind their marriage falling apart, this is the least that I could do for my brother and my family. They believed that I owed this to them and as ridiculous as it sounds, they really thought that this would convince me to be on their side after so long. I was a little surprised that they didn't bring up the custody of my niece even once while they were telling me about what they wanted me to talk to Molly about. So I decided to ask them myself and after some hesitation, they told me that they didn't think my brother wanted custody of his daughter anyway, which is why he wasn't fighting too hard for it. They told me that my brother himself had said that he was right with having just visiting

rights and nothing more. He just wanted to keep whatever he had worked for, meaning his money and his assets. And he thought that Molly would be better suited to raising their daughter. He was ready to provide them with child support, but he didn't have the time to raise their daughter on his own. So it wouldn't make sense to fight for custody if he never even got to spend time with her. It was astounding to me how he was still being so selfish and materialistic, but I I was also relieved that he wasn't fighting for her custody because she deserved a better father.

One who wanted to be her father. I heard my parents out and then I disconnected the call and blocked their number because I had recorded everything anyway. And then I sent that recording to Molly, hoping that this would be of some use to her. She hasn't replied to me yet, probably because she is busy. But I really, really hope that my brother doesn't even get visiting rights after this. I hope Molly listens to this and gets to know what an awful human being my brother was. She had told me earlier that she wouldn't mind letting him have visitation rights but now, after this conversation, I really think she should reconsider that and make sure that he doesn't ever get to breathe the same air as them anymore.

He just doesn't deserve it. He has been a terrible father and an even worse husband. Update 5, so Molly heard the recording and she was very upset. She called me up a few hours ago and told me that she was was thankful that I sent this to her because now, she is going to make sure that he doesn't get visiting rights either. I could tell that she had been crying and I wanted to console her, but I didn't even know what I could say to make her feel better. First, she had been cheated on by a man she had spent so many beautiful years with, and now, she finds out that he doesn't even

care about his own daughter. I don't even know how she finds the strength to face him during the mediation process and doesn't feel the urge to smack him in the face every single time he opens his mouth. She probably does, but she manages to restrain herself somehow. And that makes her a lot stronger than me because I don't think I would have been able to put up such a strong front, had I been in her place. I'm not even in her place, I'm just his sister and yet, I still want to hit him and teach him a lesson. I can't imagine how my parents are still supporting him after everything that he has done, and even have the audacity to tell me what I should do for him. That last phone call really made me feel sure that I did the right thing by blocking all of them.

They're disgusting people and I want nothing to do with this family anymore. If I could, I would probably even change my last name to make sure nobody associates me with these people. My brother was the worst of them all. I really hope that Molly gets whatever she wants and really makes him pay. Update 6. Hi, so it's been a few months since the last update. My parents and I haven't spoken since then and neither have I come across my brother, so it's all great. They probably realized after a while that I was the one selling them out, after that phone call reached Molly, and decided that they wouldn't talk to me anymore. But it was already too late.

Molly got whatever she asked for and has moved back into her old house with their daughter while my brother's living with our parents right now. He'd have to give up more than half of his income, what with the alimony and child support and I couldn't be happier about it. He deserves this and I really feel vindicated. Molly and I are still in touch. I visit her a couple of times every month and meet my niece who's growing up really fast. She also bought me a professional camera, since she knows how much I enjoy photography, from the settlement money and a way to thank me for all the help.

I just did what I should have, but it's nice that she appreciated it. She now refers to me as the better sibling sometimes, which is funny but also kind of sad because both of us lost someone. we loved all because of his own actions. It's fine, though, we'll get over it and be there for each other even after that. That's the end of the first story. Let's begin the second one. I hope you enjoy this story.

My relatives intended is obsessed with me, feels jealous when my relative and I spend time together, and said mean things about the elderly woman who passed away while in my care. My 27F, brother, 25, is marrying Lena, 24F. she doesn't have a family so my family tried to make her feel really included. I liked her the few times I saw her until she started to get weird. I live five hours away from my family because I worked as Rita's, 98F, personal nurse, so I lived with her and I'm studying another degree so I don't really have too much free time. The first time I met Lena almost two years ago she came up to me saying that everyone in the family

always talks about me or asks for me in every family reunion and she wanted to meet me. I make a little talk with her and then I went to talk with my aunts. The rest of the night whenever I was talking to a member of my family, Lino would get into the conversation even if it was private. I assumed she was trying to fit in and include herself so I included her in the conversations even though I found it uncomfortable. After that she included herself all the time in any conversation I was having with anyone at any family gathering but I would include her in the conversations.

The problem started when they announced their engagement. They were going to announce it at a party but before they announced it I had to leave the place urgently because Rita had fallen out of the bathtub. My brother understood the urgency and he took me to a room just the two of us to still tell me the news of his engagement before I leave. I congratulated and hugged him but Lena ruined our moment because she complained saying that the firstborn of the family. Me must be there but I just ignored her and my brother explained her that I had to leave. I have been taking care of Rita since before I graduated and she always trusted in my family. skills as a nurse and she's even paying for my second degree, which is a lot so she became a third grandmother to me and after falling in the bathroom she broke her hip and her health deteriorated

greatly. It's just me and her pregnant great-grandchild who takes care of her. My mother also comes to the hospital to help me sometimes because Rita doesn't like to be touched by the hospital nurses. She hates when strangers touches her for some traumas from her childhood. A few months ago, Lena went out with the women of the family to try on wedding dresses and one of my cousins told me that Lena kept complaining because I didn't went with them. Rita was sick and I was taking care of her. Lena knew that. On my mother's birthday I invited her for a brunch. It was supposed to be a mother and daughter outing like we do every year but Lena insisted on coming. My mother felt uncomfortable but we included her in our brunch anyways. I can tell a lot of situations

like that where Lena pushed herself too hard to get close to me even if I was always kind with She even had an argument with a cousin because of that. I reached my limit yesterday. Rita passed away three days ago and not only am I really sad, but also my parents and brother since everyone knew her and she was a great woman. Rita wants us to bury her ashes in the cottage where she grew up. Rita's great-granddaughter surprised me with an arranged trip for the two of us to go and bury the ashes next week.

I told my family that and my mother said she wants to go too, but Lena got totally mad and started to complain saying that we're going to a trip two days before the wedding. To be honest, I totally forgot about it and I don't feel with the energy to go. My mother explained that we will only go to bury the ashes and come back literally the night before the wedding day and that everything is actually ready. Lena continued complaining and I snapped when she told me that I care more about an old lady who wasn't my family and that I should care a lot more about her since she'll be my real family, my brother's wife and my nieces and nephews mother and the dead woman wasn't even my

blood. I told Lena that Rita was like family to me and that she's not even a friend to me, that she's not relevant in my life and if it wasn't for my brother I wouldn't even try to get along with her. Maybe I was mean but I was sad and angry. I left the place while Lena was trying to argue with me and she started to cry saying that she only wanted to be family for me. I always wanted to make her feel included but she crossed my boundaries and doesn't have empathy at all. She didn't even give me condolences when Rita passed away and kept talking about the wedding all day while I made calls to take care of the funeral. Now I'm thinking that I don't even want to go to the wedding. I love my brother and he even chose my bridesmaid dress but I feel too bad to go and I'm

even thinking of cutting off contact with Lena because her behavior is too weird and dense. I'm just sad and I want to cry all day because I lost the woman I considered my guide for five years for her wisdom and I feel guilty for not wanting to go to my brother's wedding and make him feel sad but I just don't want to deal with Lena anymore because next time I see her I know I will surely fight with her if makes another comment like that. Update 1, first of all, I'm grateful to those who gave me good advice even though others left weird comments and hadn't even read the post before leaving a comment. I want to clarify again that I always tried to make Lena feel welcome and I always understood

that she never had a family, but do I deserve to be treated without empathy? Why should I overflow with empathy for her when she never showed empathy for me? I'm grieving and can't even have peace right now because of her I also got comments saying that I should treat her like a toddler but that's just rude. She's a grown woman and should be treated like what she is. I think it would be insulting to treat her like a child. I talk to my parents about everything and also to my brothers. In the conversation I discovered things that Lena did and said that are even more weird. My mother said that Lena often makes comments like I'm more of a daughter to you than op since she never visits you and I come all the time which makes my mother

uncomfortable. She also said that she explained a lot of times to Lena that she doesn't likes physical touch, not even us hug her because she gets anxious and tense, but Lena just keeps hugging her. My mother also said that Lena speaks very badly of me and Lena even said that I cried more because of Rita's death than I did because of my real grandfather's death, which is something really shitty to say. My father said that a year ago Lena approached him just to say your second daughter, referring to herself, knows you better than your first daughter Haha comparing the gifts we both gave him for Father's Day and he just laughed it off, but he thought it was a weird comment to make.

My father was the only one who always kind of disliked Lena, so now I know why. My younger brother also said that he heard many times how Lena complained about me not going to family gatherings, although she also complained about that in my face a few times. So it seems that we all shut down a lot of things because we wanted to understand her situation and make my brother happy. We live next to a poor neighborhood and we know a lot of us. other people in the same situation as Lyne, so we tried to make her feel included, but I don't understand her behavior to me at all. At this point, I was crying most of all because I just don't

want to deal with this after Rita's death and I felt bad for my brother. My brother hugged me and said he's sorry and started to tear up saying that it's difficult for him to deal with Lena's behavior too. He told me that Lena was always making hateful comments towards Rita. She never met Rita and all of us and the family are sad about her departure because she was a great woman, the kindest woman who ever lived so it's really sick that she hates an old woman who's dead. And every time my brother tried to explain to her that Rita was important to us. She just gave him a cold shoulder and didn't talk to him for the rest of the day, but he's trying really hard to help her because she always wanted a family.

I told him that we want to be her family, but we need to set boundaries because those comments hurts. My father told him that this is just pushing her away from everyone and he doesn't want someone talking ill about his daughter. My brother looked really tired. He actually looks really tired every day since a few months ago, but I want to think it's because of the wedding. I didn't told him that I was thinking and cutting contact with Lena because I didn't want it at all to make him feel like he have to choose between her or me. Instead, I told him that we need to set a hard boundaries with her so that in the future

we can have a healthy coexistence and she can heal her mind because we have been too gentle so far, but the situation is already at its limit. I didn't talk with Lena at all, so I suppose my brother talked with her really seriously. The wedding is still ongoing and I will go just to show my support to my brother, but at this point I just feel that he's making a wrong decision because honestly I don't think Lena's is a mentally estable person. Actually she's not even a good person in my eyes anymore, but I don't want to say something and be the jealous big sister who ruins his brother relationship

so I will just stay in silence, letting everything flow. I just want to go to the trip and have some of mental peace wedding day comes. I don't feel mentally well enough to argue right now or to feel even more guilty because of how I'm dealing with all of this. I just want to bury Rita's ashes with her great-granddaughter and my mother. Sorry for the really bad English. Edit, yes, we tried to put boundaries a lot of times. It's not like we will hit her or be aggressive so she could understand, but I'll admit we've all been too soft an understanding of her out of pity.

Lena just doesn't want to understand slash listen the others complains even when someone talk seriously and the incident she had with me and my cousin only showed that when someone talks to her seriously she becomes the victim or gets madly angry. Even what my brother said made it clear to us that she's just maybe never going to respect boundaries so it's better for me to just stop trying and just cut contact with her at least for this and next week until I feel better and ready to talk about this again. Mini update. My brother already knows everything that Lena did. Like I said in the post, he's also tired of her behavior, but we can't do anything about their relationship if he wants to stay.

My father had a conversation with him a few hours ago to tell him that we're worried and if he wants to thinking better about the wedding but my brother said that he's fine, only tired, and will continue with the wedding. So yeah, we can't do anything but show my brother that we're with him and try to help him to open his eyes, but people have to understand that we can't help him in an aggressive way saying that Lena is a B-T-C-H or kicking her out of the family because that will only benefit her as she can take that opportunity to manipulate my brother by making herself the victim again. Dealing with a person full of traumas and childhood problems is not easy at all.

She does not know what basic limits are and now that she knows them she does not want to respect them but we can't be aggressive with her because she's not a mentally well person. Don't blame my brother if you don't understand what it's like to be in a toxic relationship. He's not to blame for anything and he's just a victim. comments where OP has replied, Shell, why is he still getting married to this woman considering this is how she treats his family? Just make sure to support your brother if he ever become sane enough to get a divorce. Oh, O.P., for what he said, she also treats him badly so I don't understand neither. Maybe he's still too in love, but the only thing I can do is show him my support.

For now I just don't want to talk with Lena at all because I'm not in feeling well mentally bright add 306. I do think your family might want to gently let him know that they're worried about how he's being treated. He might tell Lena and then they'll shoot the messenger, though. Oh, okay, we did it. My mom asked him if it's a toxic relationship and he just kept quiet and said he just wants to help Lena. He has the same behavior that friends of mine have had when they had toxic partners and I really know that when people are in abusive relationships, they are usually blinded by love and they don't want to believe reality. I feel full for not noticing that behavior before, but I wasn't around the family too much lately. Update 2. I think it's been a while

since I last posted and I was feeling too stressed and didn't even log back into this account as honestly the comments only managed to stress me out even more, but there are people who keep asking me for an update and worried about all of this mess. Also sometimes I need to just vent. First of all, I want to make it clear that my brother is an adult. We can advise him, but the final is made by him. In my first post I didn't know anything about what I said in my second post, please understand that it was a time of stress and anxiety for me to discover all those things that obviously changed the perspective you have of someone and I was in a difficult moment. That being said the wedding did happen. After another intervention my father made it clear to my

brother that he does not approve the marriage. My father didn't attended the wedding and since that day my brother doesn't speak to anyone in the family except my mother but my mother doesn't want Lena in her house so it's complicated too. We all gave my brother the reasons why getting married with Lena is a bad idea, but he chose to do it anyway. But he's my brother and I know at some point he'll open his eyes and he knows he can come to me anytime he needs. For people who will say, oh, ah, but you should have done X or you should have done why your family should stop being doormats and kick Lena out of the house from the start honestly? Shut up, I think it wasn't enough to clarify that I had my own problems. Everyone in my family has our own problems and lives.

We're just trying to be kind and continue the family peace with a person who had a complicated life. My family has always been very healthy so the least we would believe is that someone my brother is dating has bad intentions. When you grow up in a healthy environment, it is difficult and shocking to deal with problematic people in the family and it's even more difficult to do something that you know is going to bring serious problems. I personally didn't even see Lena so many times to know all of the family. of those weird situations I said in my second post. I can't take charge of a life that isn't mine and I can't take responsibility for my brother's life or Lena's problems. To reassure everyone, Lena doesn't think about off me and stealing my identity or anything like that. She's weird but

not dangerous, although what my father told me is strange anyway. My brother confessed to my father that Lena feels like my relationship with my brother is weird and she feels jealous of me because I'm his favorite person. My brother and I usually lie in the same bed to why. I'm a woman. My brother and I usually lie in the same bed to watch TV slash play video games and he usually hugs me but it's something I do even with my other brother but she thinks that's weird. I don't think that's weird at all and I know many people who is close with their siblings in that way. My brother confessed that he and Lena tend to have a lot of arguments about it. Another thing he hid, since Lena gets jealous when he spends time alone with me, but that Lena doesn't understand how siblings treat each other but at the same time she also

wants to be close to me. According to my brother she wants to be very close to me and that's why she doesn't know what comments to make near me and my family. I don't believe him, my father argued with him about it, and he expressed to my brother that he doesn't plan to go to the wedding. I didn't went neither and just decided to stay more days away grieving for Rita, so I don't know how it went because my mother avoided the wedding topic. I didn't ask and I have been living in Rita's house for now. Sorry if this is not the update people wanted, but yeah, that's it.

I'm sorry if anyone expected me to say something like that. Lena is now in jail for impersonating me or that Lena is actually my long-lost twin sister. The reality is as depressing and simple as everyone predicted of Lena getting my brother mad at all of us and cutting off contact. At this point and now that my mind is more calmer I will just choose to let my brother do his life. I can't put energy on this and my mother told me to just let him be and we did everything we could. He's an adult. I don't understand what Lena wants. I don't understand if she hates me or if she likes me or if she wants to be me. I understand that my brother is in a toxic relationship but still I can't help but feel hurt.

We talked to my brother trying to convince him not to get married but at the end of the day he made his decision. He even confessed many other things about Lena that he lied about and had hidden from us so for now I know he's just going to try to protect her all the time. I even talked to Lena before they got married but it was an argument that went nowhere and only made my brother mad at me for confronting her but I knew that's what was going to happen the moment I put limits to Lena. The same thing happened to my father and my other brother, you just can't explain the boundaries to her because she doesn't respect them or gets offended. At this point my mother only has little contact with Lena so that she can continue to have contact with my brother as well. Comments where OP has replied, S-N-U words 4839. H-U-G-S, you have to look out for yourself and hope your brother knows what he is doing.

Lena has issues, but now, you don't have to deal with her. Your brother may feel differently in a few months, once he is basically cut off from the family. More drama ahead, when she has the first grandchild. Lena is a very insecure pick-me person. O-O-P, my brother can't have biological children and he doesn't want to adopt either because it's really difficult in my country. I doubt very much that they will have children but I don't know STNMTN underscore. I remember your first two posts.

I wonder if Lena has anxious attachment disorder. What is her relationship with her parents and siblings? It seems she wants to be the center of your brother and mother's world. Anything that gets in the way of that is upsetting to her. OOP, more than being my mother's center of attention, I think she wants to be just my brother's center of attention. She wants to be my brother's favorite person by being my parents' daughter and his sister, if that makes any sense, I don't know. That's what I deduced from her behavior and what my brother

said she has no relationship with her family because they are addicts.