Reddit Stories - Secrets Exposed Family Drama And Karma In Betrayal Stories (Over 6 Hours Comp.) - Ep 06

Episode Date: June 22, 2026

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #betrayal #familydrama #secrets #karma #storytime Episode 06 delves into intense family drama, exposing secrets and the consequences of betrayal. Over six hours of gripping stories reveal how karma unfolds in relationships, highlighting the emotional turmoil and lessons learned. Each tale offers a unique perspective on trust, loyalty, and the impact of hidden truths. redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, betrayal, familydrama, secrets, karma, storytime, emotionalturmoil, trustissues, loyalty, hiddentruths, relationships, lifeadvice, personalstories, drama, conflictresolution, storytelling, experiencesBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6816713/support.This episode includes AI-generated content.

Relax and enjoy the next following extra compilation of stories. I hope you enjoy this story. Spouse was having affairs with other individuals secretly for 13 years before ending our relationship. All right, this will be quite extensive, very extensive. I hope that if you leave a comment, you read over it. To start, I will contextualize by stating my wife just left me. I have had problems with her behavior for years, and it has been slowly eating away at me. I'm going to try to include all of my thoughts here, to give a clear picture. I just feel

like I need to get this out, talking is how ideal. You will see that an inability to do this, along with a feeling something wasn't quite right in my relationship with my wife, had a lot to do with poisoning our relationship. We have, up to about a month ago, married for nearly eight years, and together for about 13. So, to start, I began dating my wife when she was a in her first graduate year of college. I can honestly say I was head over heels in love with her. Now, she was very much the opposite of me. I am introverted, opinionated, blunt, and far from charming. She is excessively extroverted, malleable to opinions depending upon the circle, and extremely high energy. I never, at first though, took her for someone shallow, obsessed with opinion, or superficial.

Over time, that opinion has very much changed. I learned early in dating that my future wife was very seagullly promiscuous. As a matter of fact, a good number of her friends were people she had formerly slept with, and she had a story of making out at one point with nearly every guy friend she had. Now, at this time, I thought okay, she is a young woman in college, that is just normal behavior. I never thought of myself as a jealous person and had never really experienced jealousy. Again, this would change drastically. All names I use will be false by the way. I don't think they will matter to those here anyway.

So, to start, the very first week I was seeing her, she told me not to call or visit her because her close friend Jerry was coming into town and staying at her place. She said she wanted to be alone with someone she could relate to. I decided to put this to the back of my mind, after all, just because it was a guy, that didn't mean anything right. Well, the reason this is bookmarked in my mind is because I would come into contact with Jerry a lot, and I found out that my future wife, will call her Alicia, had a past romantic history with Jerry.

Further, their interactions in my presence would often be interesting. My wife's accounts often vary, so putting together exactly what was going on is hard to do. According to Alicia, she and Jerry had crushes on each other when she was dating her first boyfriend. According to her, though she had many sensual partners, only one boyfriend. The time frames on her relationship with this boyfriend differ on the account. Sometimes she was dating him from her junior year of high school until her sophomore year in college. Another account had her dating him until her freshman year of college. She has said before that she used him, this boyfriend.

essentially after they had split. She also said they were on again off again. She also stated at one point she and Jerry were behaving like a couple, but then he slept with one of her friends. But later she said that she had betrayed him first. I kind of think she was sleeping with Jerry while her boyfriend was under the impression they were still dating. I am outlining this because I wonder if the same thing hasn't happened to me. If it isn't repetitive behavior. So over the first thing, the first two years of our dating, we were regular bar flies. Elisha was an admitted flirt, and often flirted in front of me. To put it lightly, she didn't just flirt in front of me, but often spoke openly and in detail of her past Seagull experiences. With her former Seagull

partners. Again, often in front of me. Other than Jerry, she had had one other recurring FWB icon name. We will call him Mark. Now, Mark would turn out to be a legitimately good person. We are friends to this day. At the time, I came to hate him. He made it a habit to talk about the things he and Alicia would do sequally. Again, with her and in front of me. It's hard to listen to someone in your girlfriends past talking about the person you're dating sitting on their face.

With her replying, yes I was. Other things during these first two years would bother me. I would often meet her out to find her engaged in close conversation with a stranger and couldn't be bothered to say hello to me. She often ended up surrounded by an impenetrable wall of guys, and I wouldn't even be able to speak to her for hours. Whenever Jerry came over, he always took the seat closest to her, and they sat very close. When he played video games, she would bring him a bowl of bouquet, and hold and light it for him. She would interrupt me to listen to what Jerry had to say. All the time.

For a time Jerry was sleeping with the downstairs neighbor, but when coming to see her he would always head upstairs to see Alicia first. On one occasion her best friend came to visit her, and again she did not want me to come over so she could be alone with her friend. This one a female school friend. But she ended up inviting her close friend Snyder, as well as four other people over. She did this again on a night that was just supposed to be a girl's night. I was not to call or visit.

She ended up inviting four guys, not including me, to hang out for girls' night. I really was trying to let these things go, but it became harder and harder to ignore them. I was becoming anxious and insecure. Now, I should also mention I had a daughter that I saw every other weekend. During this period, I fell into a period of unemployment. It was very hard to find a job, and I fell behind in child support. It was during one of our many recessions. At this point Alicia was doing an internship, and I tried to maintain contact with her. It was disheartening, though, because whenever I called her she sounded completely disinterested,

and would often carry on conversation with her friends around her while on the phone with me. One thing I took personally, I had to go to court once because I was behind on my payments. I almost went to jail, but cut a deal with my daughter's mother. I had just found a job, and asked her to give me two weeks to get together over $1,000. Naturally, I was stressed, and ended up having to borrow money. I called Alicia to vent and maybe seek comfort, but again, she was not only disinterested. She was munching on her Chipotle and talking animatedly with her friends over the phone. No interest, no worry, no empathy.

Nothing. A few weeks later she was going on a trip to an amusement park with people she knew from her internship. Again, she did not want me to come. But I found out others on the trip brought there significant others. Like I said, this crap builds and becomes hard to forget. She would also go to a Christmas party with Jerry in which she admits Jerry was hitting on her. So now, let's skip ahead another year. She moves home, and we have to have to be a Christmas party with Jerry in which she admits Jerry was hitting on her. So now, let's skip ahead another year. She moves home, and we have a conversation about moving in. I get a small inheritance at the time that allows us to find a place, I get a job in her area, and we move in together. After nearly two and a half years of ignoring her inconsiderate behavior,

I finally talked to her about how much her flirting bothers me. She tells me a story about being at a nearby bar while I was gone, and she stated she told the bartender I would totally F you if I was single. I basically said I didn't need to hear that. And the next moment she got pissed, started screaming, and claimed she never said that. When she had literally just related the story to me, I would quickly begin to find out that Alicia had no tolerance whatsoever for criticism to her character. She hates it and gets violently angry of questioned.

Also, Jerry texts her late at night during this period, and I see what he texted her, when do I get to see that fine crap again. Time goes by, and everything is actually all right. Better than before, in fact. We establish a close group of friends, she and my daughter are getting closer, there are very few, if any fights, everything is great. In this group are her cousin, and cousin's husband.

This is important, by the way. We'll call them Sonny and share. The only thing that was not great during this time was our sexy life. For reasons I cannot explain, our love-making life wasn't just slowing down, it was completely stopping. Alicia had almost no interest in love-making. Well, after three years, about this group of friends falls apart for various reasons. During this time Alicia and I became engaged. Things were still pretty okay between myself, Alicia, my daughter, and our friendship with Sunny and Cher.

After a few years we got married, with Sunny presiding over the ceremony. Another year goes by, and things start to get dark. Very dark. Cher finds out Sunny has been cheating on her for years, and the two get divorced. Share starts seeking consolation from Alicia, which is natural, they are friends and family. But then comes a very strange twist. Share is going to totally satisfy her midlife crisis and begins to go out bar hopping and boy hunting like crazy. Now that alone is not the strange part.

She insists on taking my wife with her almost every other night as her wing man. At this time I work a job that mandates, sometimes three to four times a week. I'm there often from 3 p.m. to 7 a.m. And my wife is going out meeting guys while I'm at work. She is less interested in intimacy than ever at this point. She often says it is because she is tired, but she has plenty of energy for going out. At one point she gleefully brags about a bouncer hitting on her, and the bartender helping him along. Apparently he told her, well, you must be here looking for something.

I just want to say a few things about this incident, by the way. First, when I would go to this bar with her, she did seem awfully friendly with this bartender. let us call him george one night during her birthday she basically jumped at him and gave him a very close hug she would later say he hugged her but she was so drunk that night she fell flat on her face before even getting to the bar i was still very sober when i vented this to one of elisha's friend all i had to say was alicia and george and this friend literally broke out into tears this was the most suspicious part later someone who knew my wife and held a party my wife frequented would show up at work when he learned where i lived he asked if i knew alicia and her boyfriend george this might have been a mistake but it's a hell of a coincidence also there was a joke around the bar that george was not well endowed but he was good at other things well later alicia would relate to me how disappointing it is to have segs with someone not very well endowed she said she made love with the this one guy who was small, but he was good at other things. I might be reading too much into that part, I don't know. Something else strange happened at this time. There was a period

of two months where Alicia and I had literally no sags. Lovemaking had been an issue for years by now, but we had sporadic moments of intimacy. During this period, literally nothing. Well, what is strange is that Alicia missed her period for a month, and was afraid she might be pregnant. Whether she was or wasn't, I couldn't help wondering why she would think that was a possibility if she was only sleeping with me. I brought it up once, and Alicia characteristically flipped out. After this she would start taking birth control, and our sexy life still stagnated. Around this time we attended a family wedding. I recall that after the wedding, she was drunk and started to talk about skinny dipping in the hotel swimming pool.

My dad and brothers went to bed, and so did I, I had been up for 24 hours at least because of work. She ended up going with my cousin's husband while I lay down. I actually woke up two hours later, and she wasn't there, she was in the morning, but she would go on to say they didn't go skinny dipping, and she came right back. Which I know isn't true. Later, Alicia would go to Cher's house for a pool day. She took my daughter with her. One of our acquaintances, let us call him Frank, was there.

Well, Alicia tells me about how Frank and Cher were highly inebriated, and Frank hit on her. Right in front of my daughter. I would later mention this, and Alicia got angry because she was worried I would piss off Cher and others present. It was at this point that I realized my wife cared far more about what those in her social circle thought, than what I did. eventually the going out all the time, including on my days off without me, stopped when Cher met someone new, and eventually remarried. After that, by the way, Alicia almost never heard from Cher. I'm going to be completely Holmes, I started emotionally distancing myself, and even numbing myself to the idea of my wife being with another person at this point. I was even trying to make myself not care about love-making.

All of this was making me anxious. I even started having panic attacks. She would start to notice too. The distancing, not the panic attacks. I told her about one I had when I was over at her cousins on my break during a Super Bowl party. I had one before that at my previous job. I was sent to the hospital with extremely high blood pressure. I blacked out.

So now, to the recent present. By that I am talking 22 about now. A lot of things happened. I lost my job, got on unemployment, the unemployment was rescinded putting me in debt. I was accused of endangering another person at work, and ended up going to court, and now I'm on probation. I fell into a whirlwind of depression and anxiety. I felt paralyzed. I didn't want to even leave home.

I was becoming short-tempered and unmotivated. All this during the pandemic. Alicia had started a new career and being the extrovert she is, was not taking being stuck inside well. Before the pandemic got really serious, Alicia went to Florida for work training. There was a night when she went to a Caribbean club and was pursued by one of the patrons. Apparently the chef came out to tell her how beautiful she was, which struck me as odd. If the chef was in the back, how did he know to come out and tell a random stranger how she looked? Again, maybe I'm reading too much into this.

Well, she called me once in the night to tell me these guys are really making me want to smoke bouquet. She called me again, supposedly on her way home, when an unfamiliar voice started screaming into the phone. I mean, it was so loud this person had to have his mouth to the receiver. Anyway, she called me back and told me it was the guy who pursued her. He was an Uber driver, and pulled over on the other side of the street to offer. for her a ride. This is what she told me while she was drunk. Sober, she said she bumped into him in person walking out of the club. But when she talked to me that night she said she was already out of the club walking home. We both started going to therapy. Well, in the months

leading up to her leaving, she was staying at work later and later. She said that it was because she had so much work, but she had no problem getting out if there was a dinner with work friends, or a ball game or something. I went to her work friend's house with her once, sober the entire time. They at one point in the night started intimately holding hands and staring at each other. I am not mistaken there, I saw what I saw, this was a female co-worker with a boyfriend. Three days following this, Alicia says to me you know, I would still totally have a threesome. Just not with you, that would be weird.

Alicia starts working out, spending more time on her appearance. She gets home later and later. I am working a 1 a.m. to 10 a.m. shift. She routinely gets home when I have only 4 to 5 hours. She went out one day to a 5-hour book club when we hadn't seen each other, and got home right when I needed to go to bed. She refuses to be careful with her bouquet around the house, even though I am on probation. I mean she hangs a bag of her bag of her.

of her stuff right by the door and leaves her grinder out. Any attempt I make to talk about it is met with rage and shouting. Anytime I vent, I'm met with criticism and harsh reprimands, when she expects me to do the opposite and just listen. And I do. For the most part. There are times when my frustration bubbles to the surface and I snap, not physically, I would never hit her. The only subjects she is interested in talking about any more are her fitness goals and her job. She becomes increasingly more critical of me. This just causes me to be more silent and more frustrated. All the frustration comes to a head over a single incident. Two years prior, I became my daughter's primary guardian and her mom moved to Texas.

Well, her mother waits to the last minute to schedule a flight, and the only days where work does not interfere with one of our schedules is on the weekend, her schedule in particular. Apparently my daughter's mother could not find a weekend flight that was continuous. This was found out by Alicia, who decided to contact her. I'll be honest, I did not consider it our responsibility to arrange flight to my daughter's mother. As a matter of fact, it is in the custody agreement that she is responsible for scheduling and finances and travel to and from Texas. Alicia does not communicate to me my daughter's mother's inability to find a weekend flight, or that Alicia took it upon herself to reach out. out. Alicia also takes it up herself to agree to a midweek time to take my daughter to the airport.

What she does communicate to me is my daughter's mother scheduled a flight to leave early in the morning on a Wednesday. The airport is two hours away. She tells me the flight will leave 7 a.m. at the latest, and she expected to be home 10 a.m. at the latest. Now, since Alicia had work at 9 a.m., I figured she had arranged the day off, especially if she intended to be back at 10 a.m. at the latest. These were the talking points I was given and had knowledge of. Alicia got a hotel near the airport and asked if I wanted to come with her, I did end up having that night off. I had not, however, slept in days, was absolutely exhausted, and had a therapy session the next day at 11 a.m. traffic in the area around the airport can get heavy

approaching 8 to 9 a.m., and I was afraid of missing my session, which was part of my probation. Meaning, missing it could lead to a contempt of court order. In actuality, the flight was leaving at 6 a.m. I was not told this, and Alicia would get home at 8 a.m., however, under the impression she was counting on driving through heavy traffic after a flight leaving at 7 a.m. And a plan to be back at no later than 10 a.m. I thought it would be cutting it close. I declined to go with my wife to the hotel. When she tried to ask me again, sleep deprived and annoyed at her constantly leaving paraphernalia everywhere, and paying no regard to my schedule, I snapped at her. She left angry, got back the next morning, and still went to work. She had not requested the day off and would not call off.

That night, we had a conversation. She asked how long it had been since we had been. She had been unhappy. I told her since that time she was going out with her cousin. The weekend following, she stated that something broke in her that night, and she didn't want to pretend anymore. She said she didn't think we should be together anymore, and that when I told her the time for which I had been unhappy, it broke her heart. I asked her if she knew why I said that. She said no. And I outlined a good deal of what I wrote here, though not everything. She said she was going to her parents for a few days, then loaded up way more things then, I felt she could have fit into her parents' tiny house. I haven't seen her since. She didn't even come to

personally talk about our situation with my daughter after she got back, for which my daughter was devastated. I don't know for certain, but I can't help but feel there was something more to this. Maybe not, though. Maybe it was a series of really bad coincidences brought on by our differing personalities. Still, I can't shake the feeling that there is something else. Update 1, as many pointed out, it didn't really need to be confirmed, but my wife confessed to a friend that when she was going out with her cousin, she had a three-way makeup session. I'm guessing it was more than a make-up session with her cousin and the bouncer I mentioned in my original post. She was also recently caught texting her other lover before she left.

I know people keep saying this is fiction, but it is a I'm furious, and I can't stop thinking about it. Not that my W.S. deserves forgiveness, that is not what I mean, I just don't want to think about her. Ever. I want her to disappear forever from my thoughts. I hate her so much, though. I hate her for dragging me around people she was sleeping with, and probably laughing about it. I hate her for developing a bond my daughter doesn't want to break, and leaving her after my daughter's mother did the same. I hate her for trying to make me feel like I was at fault and inadequate.

Like, I hope she dies. I've never hated anyone so much. Tomorrow we are meeting to discuss possessions and details of the split. I think she wants to talk about what has been going on as well. I sent her a very angry text. It's going to feel like ripping open a wound, and I don't know if I'll be able to keep it together. any advice coping mechanisms has anyone else felt so strongly that they despised their w s that they didn't trust themselves not to lose control update two

i think i'm doing better i'm not thinking about her all the time and i'm excited to move away from this hell and get back to family and friends but after weeks of ruminating after discussing splitting our possessions after really realizing that she walked away with no feeling after betraying and embarrassing me for years, this one thought still creeps into my head. She never really loved me. It sucks. It sucks because I could have spent 13 years either working on myself, or finding someone who really did love me. Now, I don't know when I'll be able to trust someone the way I did her again. Update 3. So it has now been nine months since my wife left and I got confirmation of her infidelity. Maybe some of you remember my original post. I got the point. I ignored flag after flag. I understand. I processed. Some days I'm fine, but then others still, I have a hard time. Today is one of those days.

Every now and again I'll remember a time that where she was very intimate and seemed so sweet. They were only ever when we were alone, though. The time I'm thinking of was around our second year dating, months before we moved and together. The skyline at dusk reminded me. Corny as it is, she wanted to watch the notebook with me, and so we did. I remember feeling sad and depressed that day, and I was just happy to be with her. She was so sweet, we cuddled close on the couch, had a mild night, talked, and just enjoyed each other's company. The skyline at the time we were done with the movie was orangeish red like tonight. I remember we went outside to smoke a cigarette, sitting so close, leaning on each other. You know what she said to me? I hope we die together, so we can be together

to the end. How does a person go from that, to being automatically promiscuous and entirely forgetful of my presence immediately in a social setting? Any social setting. Every social setting. Like flicking a switch. It's just so bizarre. Even acting embarrassed at my presence, talking over me, just being awkward. Sorry, even after nine months, it hurts when I remember the contrasting moments. I'm really just writing this to express myself. I wish I could do what she does, and just forget like it's nothing. I still recall, two weeks after she left she texted me, it doesn't have to be weird,

just because we're not a couple anymore. Like, it was 13 years, and we were. were married. How do you just do that? Like I said, not really looking for answers. I just wanted to write how I was feeling. After nine months, I shouldn't still be thinking about this stuff. I hope you enjoy this story. Discovered my spouse and sibling engaging in intimacy on our sofa after he departed and left our child sobbing with a fractured limb. Presently, he is dispatching presence in an attempt to seek pardon, while my sibling is, lives in her car. I, 40F, and my husband, 42M, have been married since I was 22 and he was 24. Edit, sorry, he was actually 23.

Up until recently, I thought our marriage was basically perfect. We have two kids together, a daughter, 12, and a son, 14. We have a nice house in the suburbs, decent jobs, and I really thought we were happy. We've had our ups and downs like any couple, but nothing major. We rarely fought and when we did, it was usually over stupid stuff like him leaving his dirty socks on the floor or me spending too much on groceries. Everything was fine until I started getting this weird feeling that my husband had feelings for my sister. I can't exactly pinpoint when it started, but I think it was around my sister's divorce. To give some context about my sister, 43F, she's always had this weird hatred towards me even though she was our parents' favorite growing up. Like, she got a car

for her 16th birthday while I got a used bike. She always found ways to take away things I loved or was good at. When I was younger, I really loved playing soccer and I was actually pretty good at it. My coach even said I had potential to play at college level someday. When my sister found out, she suddenly started playing soccer too. She was decent but honestly not better than me, not trying to brag or anything, just stating facts. One day she injured her ankles during practice and somehow convinced our parents it was my fault. She claimed I tripped her on purpose during a drill, which was complete bullshit. I was on the other side of the field when it happened. But being their favorite angel, they believed her without question and banned me from ever playing soccer

again. They even made me quit the team I was on, which was humiliating because I had to tell everyone I couldn't play anymore for no good reason. That wasn't even the worst of it. She also stole my first boyfriend in high school. His name was Alan and we'd been together for about six months, which is like forever when you're 15. One day he just broke up with me out of nowhere, and the next week he was dating my sister. She also bullied me relentlessly throughout high school, spreading rumors about me and making sure I didn't get invited to parties. I mostly kept to myself and never said anything to our parents because they always took her side anyway. After high school, I tried to distance myself from her as much as possible. I went to college in another state just to get away.

I met my husband there during sophomore year. He was sweet and attentive, everything my sister wasn't. We dated for about three years before getting married right after graduation. My sister actually seemed jealous at our wedding. She wore white, who does that at someone else's wedding? and tried to make the day about her. My husband thought it was funny at the time and said she was just being quirky. Fast forward to now. I started getting this feeling that something was off with my husband because whenever my sister called needing something,

he would drop everything to help her without a second thought. Need help moving a couch? He's there. Car broke down at 2 a.m. He'll drive across town to pick her up. Computer problems. He'll spend a little. hours fixing it. When she and her husband got divorced a while back, she immediately called my

husband and he rushed over to her place without even telling me first. That's just how it's always been, she needs him, he's there, no questions asked. I confronted him about it once or twice, but he always brushed it off saying she was family and he was just being nice. He made me feel like I was being paranoid or jealous, so I tried to ignore it, but the feeling in my gut wouldn't go away. About two months ago, our daughter broke her arm after falling off her bike or something. We both took her to the hospital while our son was at his friend's place. The doctor said it was a clean break, but she'd need to wear a cast for like six weeks. She was pretty upset because she'd miss her dance recital and the end-of-year pool party at school.

When we got home, our daughter asked if she could get McDonald's because she was hungry and hospital food sucks. She also wanted her dad to stay with her. She's always been a major daddy's girl. So I went out to get her some food while he stayed home with her. I remember it was raining that night and the drive-thru was packed, so it took longer than usual. When I came back maybe 30 minutes later, I found my husband on his way out the door with our daughter crying and literally begging him to stay. She was holding onto his leg with her good arm, sobbing that her arm hurt and she wanted him to watch a movie with her. I rushed over and asked what was happening, and he told me he was going to my sister's place because she wasn't feeling well.

I asked him why the hell he was going there when his own daughter had literally just broken her arm, and all he said was your sister needs me and then he just left. Like, he actually just walked out the door while our daughter was in tears. I was beyond pissed. After I got our daughter settled with her happy meal and put on her favorite Disney movie, I called my son and told him to come home. I packed bags for me and both kids and went to stay at my aunt's place. My aunt was the only one in my family who ever acknowledged that my sister was a spoiled brat,

so I spent a lot of my childhood with her anyway. My husband called about a dozen times that night, but I didn't answer. I was too angry. He left voicemail saying my sister had some kind of emergency but wouldn't specify what kind. He said he'd be home in the morning and we could talk then. I didn't care what his excuse was at that point. My aunt was super supportive when I told her what happened. She made up the guest rooms for us and even went out to buy my daughter's favorite cereal for breakfast.

The kids were confused about why we were staying there, but I just told them, Dad, and I needed some space for a couple days. My son seemed to suspect there was more to it, but he didn't push. Two days later I realized I'd forgotten my work computer at home, which I needed for a meeting the next day. I went back to get it while the kids were at school, thinking my husband would be at work. He works in IT for some company downtown and usually leaves early. I still had my key obviously, so I let myself in. When I walked in, I almost dropped my keys.

My husband and my sister were on our family couch doing. Well, you know what they were doing. They were so into it they didn't even hear me come in at first. When they finally noticed me, they scrambled to get dressed. My sister grabbed her clothes and ran to the bathroom while my husband pulled on his pants and ran over to me saying it wasn't what it looked like and that it was all a misunderstanding. Like, seriously? How is having sex with my sister on our family couch a misunderstanding? I just stood there for a minute, honestly too shocked to even process what I was seeing.

Then I started yelling at him, asking how he could do this to me and if I meant nothing to him after almost 20 years together. I asked how long it had been going on. He tried to claim it was just this once, but I didn't believe him for a second. I told him I wanted a divorce and then I left. I didn't even bother getting my computer. I just needed to get out of there. When I got back to my aunt's place, I went into the room I was staying in and completely broke down crying. I think I cried for like three hours straight.

My aunt came in to check on me and found me just sitting on the floor staring at the wall. I told her what happened, and she was absolutely furious. I've never seen her so angry. She called my sister some names I won't repeat here. She told our parents and most of our family members even though I asked her not too. But honestly, part of me is glad she did because I don't think I would have had the courage to tell them myself. My mom called crying, saying she couldn't believe my sister would do something like this. My dad was oddly quiet, which is unusual for him.

I think he was in shock. My husband and sister have been blowing up my phone with texts and calls, but I've been ignoring them. My husband's messages started with him begging for forgiveness, saying it was a mistake and he still loves me. Then they turned angry when I wouldn't respond, saying I was overreacting and needed to come home to discuss this like adults. My sister's messages were even worse.

She actually had the nerve to say that they were in love and had been fighting their feelings for years. Like that makes it better somehow. I just don't know how I'm going to tell my kids. What am I supposed to say? Your dad is fucking your aunt? Sorry for the language, but I'm just so angry and hurt right now. My son is at that age where he's starting to notice things between men and women, and my daughter idolizes her dad.

This is going to crush them both. I called in sick to work for the rest of the week. I've just been laying in bed most of the time, trying to figure out what to do next. My aunt has been amazing, taking care of the kids and making sure they get to school. She told them I have the flu. I don't even know what I'm asking here. What would you do in my situation? I feel like my whole life has been a lie and I don't know where to go from here.

Update 1. Wow, I can't believe how many comments this got. I had to turn off notifications because my phone was blowing up. Thank you all so much for the support and love you've shown me. It makes me feel less alone knowing that even though I don't know any of you, you're all here for me. I've been reading through all your comments and advice. Some of you asked for more details that I didn't include in my original post, so I'll try to address those. Someone in the comments asked if my sister and I have different body types, and yes we do. She's always hated that I was skinnier than her and made sure to comment on my weight every chance she got.

Even after having two kids, I'm still smaller than her, which has always been a sore point. She would say things like must be nice to eat whatever you want and not gain weight or you should eat a burger, you look sick. Meanwhile, I've always struggled with body image issues and had an eating disorder in college, which she knows about. Anyway, here's what's been happening. I've barely been sleeping or eating since I found out. My aunt has been practically forcing me to eat something every day. I told my kids that things weren't working well at work, and that was why I seemed sad. They believed me, which I was glad about because I still can't bring myself to tell them the truth about their father.

My daughter keeps asking when we're going home, and it breaks my heart every time. One thing I didn't mention in my original post was that my sister and her ex-husband, let's call him Tom. Thomas, got divorced about a year ago. Thomas is actually a really great guy, super hot and such a nice person, sorry but it's true. He works as a personal trainer or something like that. He's basically everything my sister doesn't deserve. They got divorced because she had been mentally abusing him throughout their whole relationship. She would constantly put him down, control where he went and who he talked to, check his

phone, typical narcissist behavior. She had recently started physically abusing him too, and that's when he decided enough was enough and filed for divorce. I remember he had a black guy at our family Christmas party last year, and she claimed he walked into a door. We all believed her at the time. Of course, being the person that she is, she spread lies about how he was the one doing the abuse. She told everyone who would listen that he was violent and controlling, and some people in our family actually believed her. My parents sent her money to help with lawyer fees. which makes me sick now knowing the truth. I contacted Thomas to talk with him and asked if he wanted

to help me get some revenge. He agreed right away, said he'd been waiting for my sister to get what was coming to her. We made plans to meet up at this cafe downtown. I was nervous about seeing him because we never really talked much when he was married to my sister. She always kept him away from the rest of the family, especially me. We met and just talked for hours about how abusive she was to him and how he also suspected she had feelings for my husband. He said there were times when he'd come home and find them sitting way too close on the couch, or she'd be laughing too hard at my husband's jokes. Little things that didn't seem important at the time but make sense now.

I told him what I saw, and we decided to start our revenge plan. First, we reported my sister to the police for the abuse she inflicted on Thomas. At first, the officer was skeptical, because, you know, male victim and all that. But Thomas still had a bruise on his arm from where she had hit him with some kind of picture frame, and he had texts from her threatening him. The police told us they would start investigating and advised us to get a lawyer. I'm not sure if anything will come of it legally, but at least it's on record now. Then I took all the money from the shared account my husband and I had and put it in a new account

and just my name. It was about $15,000, which isn't a ton but it's enough to help me get started on my own. I don't know if this is legal, but frankly I don't care at this point. Since I own our house, it was inherited from my grandparents, I decided I was going to kick him out. My name is the only one on the deed. I got a lawyer and started the divorce process, which I knew was going to be a long and difficult battle, but I was willing to do whatever it took to get away from him. My lawyer said I have a strong case for a favorable settlement given the circumstances,

especially since I have proof of the affair. I took pictures with my phone before I left that day, which I forgot to mention in my last post. Later that week, I sat my kids down and told them everything. I know some of you advised waiting, but I couldn't keep lying to them. My son was furious, but my daughter didn't believe me at all and told me I was lying. She accused me of making it up because I was jealous of her relationship with her dad. That hurt, but I understand she's just trying to protect herself from a painful truth. I told her that even though she might think I'm lying, I wasn't going to stop her from seeing

her dad if she wanted to. That same day, I got home from work to find my aunt had gathered my parents, my husband's parents, my husband, and my sister all at her house. I had no idea she was planning this. Turns out my aunt finally had enough of my sister and told the whole family what I had seen. She also revealed that my sister had been in and out of jail multiple times for things like shoplifting and drunk driving, and my aunt was always the one bailing her out. This was news to me too. My parents had kept all this from me, probably to protect me or some bullshit like that.

My parents were furious and started yelling at my sister about what a disappointment she was. My mom actually slapped her and told her they never wanted to see her again. It was intense. My husband's parents told him they never thought he could stoop so low, especially since his mom raised him as a single parent before she met his stepdad, who he calls dad. They've always been good people and I know they're ashamed of him now. My daughter stood up and yelled at her dad, telling him how much she hated him and never wanted to see him again. Then she ran upstairs to the room she was sharing with her brother at my aunt's house and slammed the door. My son just gave his dad this really disappointed look and followed his sister upstairs. It broke my heart to see them

hurting like that, but at least now they know the truth. My husband actually knelt in front of me and begged for forgiveness. He was crying and saying he made a huge mistake and would do anything to fix it. I told him he had two days to pack his shit and leave our house or I'd call the cops. He started sobbing and said he had nowhere to go since his parents told him he wasn't welcome at their place anymore. I told him I didn't care and that I wanted a divorce. He could sleep in his car for all I cared. He eventually said okay and left with red, teary eyes. My sister just stood there through all of this, not saying a word. She didn't apologize or try to defend herself. She just looked empty, almost like she was bored by the whole situation. I don't understand

how someone can cause so much pain and not feel anything about it. Two days later, I went back home with my kids. They hadn't been to school since finding out and were having a really hard time, especially my daughter. She would swing between crying and being angry, sometimes breaking things in her room. My son was quieter about it, but I could tell he was hurting too. He stopped playing video games, which is very unlike him. I sat them both down and held them in my arms, telling them we were strong and we would get through this no matter what. I promised I'd always be there for them. They both broke down crying until they fell asleep. I woke them up to take them to their beds, then went downstairs and had my own breakdown. I can't let my kids see how hard this is on me.

I have to be strong for them. I heard the doorbell ring and thought it was my ex coming back, but it was Thomas. He came by to check on me because I hadn't been answering my phone, it was on silent. He sat with me while I cried, telling him I couldn't do this on my own. It felt good to just let it all out with someone who understood what my sister was capable of. He stayed the night on the couch, and when I woke up, he had made breakfast for me and the kids. Just eggs and toast, but it was nice not to have to do it myself for once. The kids seemed to enjoy having him there. He asked if they wanted to go somewhere special with him, like the arcade or the movies, and they just shrugged.

I was about to tell them it was okay, that they didn't have to go, but he somehow talked them into it, and they finally agreed, running to their rooms to get ready. I gave him a big hug and thanked him, and he hugged me back, telling me to take all the time I needed. For clarity, my kids have always been close with Thomas, he was married to my sister for like seven years and was always the one who would play with them at family gatherings

while my sister ignored them. When they came back home later, I almost started crying again at what I saw. Thomas had ordered their favorite takeout, and they were sitting on the sofa eating while my daughter was cuddled up against his side, her eyes read from crying. I quietly took off my shoes and jacket before joining them with a smile. My son ran up and gave me a big hug, and we all enjoyed our night together. It was the first time I'd seen them smile in days. I had a talk with my kids, and they agreed that we should all

starts seeing therapists. Thomas helped convince them because he was seeing one himself after everything with my sister. I found a family therapist who specializes in divorce trauma, and we have our first appointment next week. My husband keeps blowing up my phone with texts and calls, but I just blocked him. I've also cut off my parents, at least for now. I'm still too angry about them hiding my sister's legal issues from me and always taking her side. I got tested for STDs, all clear. Thank God. That's all for now. I'll update if anything else happens. Again, thank you all for the support. Update 2. Hey everyone, it's been a while since my last update. I've been super busy with work, my kids, therapy, and just everything else. Things are starting to get better for me,

and I'm beginning to feel good again, mostly, thanks to Thomas. A lot of you have been asking for an update, so here it is. Sorry it took so long. My daughter has been trying her best, but it's still really hard for her. Sometimes she'll come to me or Thomas crying about how much she hates her dad, and other times she'll go crying to him because she wants his comfort. I don't blame her and never will. It breaks my heart to see her suffering so much. All she wants is for our family to be back together, and I wish I could give her that, but the damage has been done. My daughter and son had their first therapy session last week, and the therapist said this kind of back and forth is normal for kids their age. They don't know how to process these complicated feelings. One minute they are angry at their

dad for what he did, and the next minute they miss him and the way things used to be. As for my ex, he broke things off completely with my sister and hasn't spoken to her since. I guess even he has standards. He got himself a good paying job. He worked at his dad's company before all this and got fired, and is living in a really nice house because, for some reason, he had been saving up money just in case I caught him and my sister one day. I know all this because my daughter tells me everything. I don't press her for information, but she says she wants me to know what's going on in her dad's life. Apparently, he asks about me all the time, wants to know if I'm dating anyone or if I miss him. I told her she doesn't have to be our messenger, but she insists she wants to be

involved. My son doesn't speak to his father at all and never visits. I'm not going to force him to. The divorce is moving along slowly. My ex is contesting pretty much everything, trying to drag it out as long as possible. My lawyer says this is a common tactic. He's hoping I'll get tired of fighting and agree to less favorable terms. Not happening. My ex has been trying to get in touch with me and sends me flowers and gifts. I accept them because I hate throwing away perfectly good things. It's just not who I am. And if I'm being honest, part of me still loves him, it's not easy to let go of those feelings overnight. We were together for almost 20 years. That doesn't just disappear, even after what he did. From what I've heard, my sister is living in her car and working at a very

low-paying job, some fast food place I think. Her life has pretty much fallen apart since all this came out. She lost her job, she was a receptionist at a dentist's office, and most of our family won't speak to her. One thing I want to make clear is that if my sister becomes homeless, I'm going to help her because I just can't stand by and watch her live on the street, knowing how dangerous our town gets at night. I know a lot of you will think I'm crazy for even considering helping her after what she did, but she's still human. you know? I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something happened to her when I could have helped. Thomas has been a great help for all of us. But like I said before I have no interest

in him and neither does he have any interest in me. That's all for now. I'll update if anything else happens. Again, thank you all so much for the love and support. It means the world to me, and I love you all. Mini update, hey y'all, I posted an update not too long ago, and two things got lot of attention in the comments. One, me accepting gifts from my ex, and two, helping my sister in the future. Let me start with the first one. The only reason I don't throw away the gifts from him is because I hate the idea of throwing away things that are in perfectly good condition.

I was raised to never waste anything that could be useful to someone else. Thomas gave me a good idea about going to a women's shelter or orphanage and donating them. My ex usually gives me flowers, teddy bears, or jewelry, which I'm not going to use, so I'll be giving them away. The flowers I can't really donate, but the rest I can. I've already taken a box of stuff to the local shelter and it felt good to at least get some positive use out of his guilt gifts. As for helping my sister, I don't mean inviting her into my house. God no, I'm not that stupid.

I'm talking about giving her some money because in my town, it's extremely deep. dangerous for a woman to be alone at night. There have been several assaults in the past few months, especially in the areas where homeless people tend to gather. That's only if my parents fail to help her, which they probably won't. They're still furious, but they've never been able to stay mad at her for long. I know what she did was terrible, but I can't stand by and watch her get assaulted. That might make me weak or a push over in some people's eyes, but I couldn't live with that on my conscience. Some of you asked why I haven't just changed my number to stop getting messages from my ex. The thing is, with the divorce proceeding still ongoing, my lawyer advised me to keep

the same number for now. Plus, I don't want to make things harder for my daughter who still sees him regularly. She needs to be able to reach me when she's with him. Edit, don't worry, I would never let that demon of a person close to my kids or Thomas. She ruined her life, and the only thing I'll make sure of is that she keeps her car, nothing else, no contact. I would never cause the people around me more trauma than they already have. As for my ex, we have no future together, and I'm going to make sure he gets that through his thick skull. Someone in the comments said that my daughter might be telling my ex about me. I hope she is. I want him to know how much better we're doing without him.

And as for the money he saved up, I don't want it. I have a high-paying job, and my babies always get what they need when they need it. So we don't need his help or his filthy money. I hope you enjoy this story. Just a gentle prompt prior to the video starting, there will be two anecdotes shared in this video with recent developments included. Let's now proceed to the initial narrative. My betrothed conveyed a severe ultimatum, demanding that either I agree to have her parents live with us or else.

Obviously this comes off as a rich people problem, but up until five months ago I was still living in a one-bedroom apartment working at a rather large supermarket retail store making $12 HR and going to be paying off college debt until I was in my 60s. My fiancé is still working her nursing job, and we've been fully living together for four years. Some background into our relationship, we met six years ago, there were literally zero issues with us dating. When it came to some sort of conflict we sat down, explained both of our sides like adults, and generally fixed the problem. We've rarely gotten into arguments and have the same end goals in life, children, grow old together, die be buried next to each other, and have fun whenever we

can. I've always had an incredibly distant relationship with her parents, when she introduced me to them they both stated they didn't like me to my face, and thought I wasn't good enough. Her father even said not in my lifetime. When I asked for his permission to marry his daughter, which I stated the only reason I was doing it was for an olive branch. My parents, on the other hand, love my fiance, they scooped her up like she was one of us from the start, has never said anything bad about her in public, nor have they in private, she at least in my parents' eyes is the metaphorical second coming of Christ. During my grandfather's decline in health, I was the first one there, he just got old, and with being old comes complications.

I stopped working my higher-paying job to work retail to have more time to take care of him, because his other children were busy. This was a very stressful time in our relationship. I had just recently left my job, was not around often, and I, myself was super stressed. Recently, I began the slow move of everything over there, while we still have to live in our apartment until the lease agreement is up, there's nothing against the rules of me moving stuff. I brought it up to my girlfriend how taking care of my grandfather has really made me realize how important my family is and that I wanted to know if it was okay for my parents to move into

the new house with us. My dad could retire and my mom can spend the rest of her life relaxing not stressing over bills slash debt because I can pay that off over time. I'm not insane enough to pay it all in one go, she expressed how that was an amazing idea and how she'd like her parents to move in as well. I laughed at the idea. and asked her if she was serious, and why would I want to live in a house with people I don't like, nor want to interact with? She explained that this could be a good chance at us healing old wounds, and making amends. I explained that not only do I not want to heal old wounds, if it was up to me, they wouldn't be coming to the wedding. Obviously this was the wrong thing to say,

and now she's giving the ultimatum of let them move in, or the wedding is off. While I can understand her side, I seriously do not want to interact with them in any capacity. They've tried numerous times to get her back with exes, lie about me, even spread a rumor about me being unfaithful, until I pulled up real evidence of me being nowhere near where they said I was thanks to Google location. My fiancé knows all of this, and still wants to try and rebuild a relationship with them. This past week, I've been avoiding her with excuses slash white lies, I've been meeting with accountants, lawyers, wedding venue people, and jewelers, I've also been spending all-nighters at my grandfather's grave drinking with him and not getting back home until 4 a.m. To me,

it feels like my grandfather is still the only person I can vent my deepest secrets and frustrations too. Which is why I've come to you Reddit, I feel trapped. On one hand I do not want to live with people I absolutely hate, and on the other hand I do not want to lose the woman of my dreams. I want a third party's opinion on the matter, with no connection to me whatsoever as I feel it's the best way to make a good judgment without people close to me influencing my choices. I'm more than willing to answer questions, and know how this sub-bred it works because I too am a pizzeria ting, pimple-popping, redditor myself. Update, Fiancé, 27F, threatening to call of wedding if I, M26, don't let her parents,

M57 slash F-50, move in with us after the wedding. This will be my only update post available for this subreddit. In the 48 hours since I've posted the thing took off like a rocket ship, I'd like to start off by thanking everyone for their opinions, while a majority of you told me to leave, others offered compromises, logical alternatives, and gave me questions I didn't even think to ask myself. I'll put a TLDR at the bottom, but I probably won't need it.

I think this has been the longest 48 hours of my life, reading through comments, responding to them, having meetings IRL and talking with my fiancé have really given me clarity on what my next choices in life are going to be. Want to postpone the wedding? While some of you may refer to it as calling her bluff, I call it waiting and seeing. As of right now, we're really talking about how compatible we truly are, going over our goals in life again, and talking in depth about the relationship we want with our in-laws if we got married apparently a lot had changed since the last time we talked about it. Before I got money, some of you called it. Two, yes, she genuinely thought

moving her parents in would make my relationship with them better over time. I've expressed that as a result of all they've said slash done to me any positive relationship or communication with them will only be done out of necessity. For example if she was pregnant, in the hospital, or any life-altering complication or celebration. She did not take this well, but that was expected, but it's important I tell my truth. She believes I'll come around and try to build a relationship with her parents, but as of right now I can't see myself doing it. Three, my parents won't be moving in, as I haven't even asked them yet. I know some of you were confused slash assumed it was already happening. It was not,

I asked if it was okay if they could, not telling her it was happening. Some of you suggested that maybe moving them in as newlyweds was weird, and suggested building them a small house on property. I didn't think about that, and will talk to my accountant slash parents about it whenever that conversation needs to be talked about. Nice idea read it strangers. Four, what have I been doing? A lot of meetings about my future, finances, and setting up trusts slash wills. I'll be re-enrolling into school to take classes on business, finances, accounting, and economics as my accountant suggested I do. We're still working on a buddy. We're still working on a but as of right now my next steps are furthering my education to manage my newfound wealth

and opportunity in a healthy way as to not blow it. As of right now, to be honest, I'm emotionally drained, I think think the weight of my grandfather's death is finally hitting me despite it being months later, and the only thing that kept me going was the idea of the wedding day. With that being postponed, I can really only focus on myself, my values, and my emotions. Staying up all night and drinking at a grave site isn't healthy, and I've not only promised myself to cut back on the booze, but also not stay up drinking. I've been thinking about maybe getting into some sort of therapy slash grief counseling, but I'd need to make sure that is in the budget with my accountant as that's a long-term thing maybe they know someone. Five couples counseling, to those that suggested

it, that's a wonderful idea. However, I'm not sure if I can move past her strange dependent relationship with her parents. Initially, I thought I could, but with the rose-tinted goggles off I'm starting to see a lot of red flags I'm not too confident a therapist slash wedding can solve. We both have issues we need to work through, but right now I'm not sure if we'll be working through them together. I know a lot of you said to drop the relationship, but I think after six years it's worth giving it a try to save it. Making a choice like that without trying to fix the problem seems silly, but I did expect a lot of those answers to come through it's just how red it is. Just know that, I know my worth, I know my values, and I'm not backing down. Maybe we won't work things out,

and the relationship will just end. Maybe things will work out, and we can continue, at least for now 48 hours later, it's too soon to tell. Six as for the pre-nup, we haven't signed anything yet, a lot of you are really harping on the nice ring and fancy vacations once a year thing. While the vacations compromise is indeed concerning, the ring issue is something we've been having conflict on for a while. My personal opinion before slash now is that rings are overpriced, silly, and serve no significant purpose in a relationship. She says that their important symbol of love slash commitment. The compromise to the pre-nup in regards to the ring was, I actually buy her a better ring than I already had, which sounds super predatory in those words,

but it makes sense in my mind. She doesn't want a Titanic Heart of the Ocean-style jewelry piece, just something a bit more noticeable. I probably should have elaborated on that in my original post, but hey, we all make mistakes, which to some sounds like gold digger mentality, but I know the price range of rings she wants and it's about the same range my dad spent on my mom's ring. It's something you'd see on a middle-class woman's finger, nothing huge, nothing small, just enough I guess. I still think they're just silly circles of metal and compressed dirt. There's not much to say, we sat down, talked for a while. I explained my side

of things, she explained hers, she was upset I was postponing the wedding, but once she realized I wasn't going to fold she agreed under the notion that it was best for our relationship to work on this before marriage. Right now, I'm taking a step back from her to clear the air and give us time to formulate what we want on our own. I've driven the two hours to the cabin. Thankfully, the internet people hooked that up yesterday. I've talked to my parents, not about them like moving in, but about the situation as a whole. Leaving out I went to the internet before I went to them. While my dad can't just abandon his job, he sends his love and support. My mom is currently making the 18-hour drive, so I wouldn't be alone by myself. I've gotten attempted phone calls from

the in-laws within the last 24 hours, but I've watched them ring and went back to doing my everyday tasks like lawn work, meal prep, reading, binge watching Netflix. It's strange, but right now I feel happier alone right now than I do with fiancé. Maybe it's some sign that it's not meant to be, or that I've finally been able to relax for the first time in years and have found comfort in solitude. Maybe I'm happy my mom is going to cook me my favorite dinner as a child to cheer me up. I think as of right now, though, I have a lot of work to do not only emotionally but also literally. I'm thinking about doing some telework just to still have a mainstream of income part-time, as I'll probably get bored of being jobless in about a week I need some hobbies.

Now on to the next story, story two. My girlfriend of 10 months is mad that I won't put her name on the deed. I have been dating my girlfriend for the last 10 months and things have moved very quickly to say the least. We started living together about one month into the relationship, first at my condo and now at her mom's house. Our relationship has been great overall and we both love each other a lot, though my parents disapprove because they are worried they are after me for my money, I am a physician, and she works in a fairly low-paying and unstable field. Around five months into the relationship my GF and her mom started looking to buy a house for us because they felt that we were ready to get married.

For me, I felt that we were moving too quickly, but I couldn't think of any reason why I didn't want to marry her, because she is so caring slash sweet and I am happy with her. Anyhow, so I was initially hesitant to jump to buying a house with my GF so soon, but they were saying that the house prices will go up in the future and that they had found a plot with extremely good land and future value where we could build a home, so I decided to go along with it. We just recently finalized the purchase agreement,

but don't officially own the title yet until the house is fully built. So far we only had to make the down payment of 20%, which amounts to about 203K since the house is worth 1.1M. Because of her unstable income and she was in quite a bit of debt, I ended up having to make the entire 20% down payment, which took a 130K loan from my parents and 20K from my own bank account. It was a pretty stressful process to be honest and my GF didn't help much she was playing games while I was asking her

how I can pay for this down payment and didn't really offer to contribute at all. I put the title of the house in my name because I felt I had contributed all the money to it. She wanted to have her name added to the title. At first I promised her I would add her name and we would split the house 50 to 50 without thinking. But then I talked it over with my parents and close friends and they advised me to keep the house under my name since I had put all the money in. And since we weren't yet married, they urged me to discuss this with my GF as soon as possible, which I did tonight. It made me realize I hadn't really considered what would happen if we broke up, and since we had been cohabitating for the past several months, we might be labeled as common law which

means she could claim 50% of the house. When I mentioned it to her, she got extremely upset saying that I was being very selfish and cold-blooded and that I was questioning the future of our relationship. This was not the case at all, but I just wanted to plan for the worst-case scenario. I guess a part of me still fears being taken advantage of. She started crying and then her mom came downstairs and basically scolded me for two hours saying I should not have brought this up and that I shouldn't listen to my friends or my parents because they are not always acting in my best interests and wanting to break us up. I was very taken aback by this as I felt she was attacking my friends without even knowing them.

She made a point of saying I shouldn't learn from my friends. She then said me bringing up the title of the house was done in a very hurtful way. and she said I didn't have enough love in my heart that I was thinking in such calculating ways. I told her that it's easy for her to say that when they haven't put any money into it and rely solely on me to pay for the house. I mentioned it was inconsiderate of them to start shopping for a house when they didn't have a solid plan for how to pay it off except relying on me. She and her mom told me that in Chinese culture, the husband is supposed to buy the wife the house. I pointed out that we weren't even married yet and she said me bringing this up meant I wasn't planning to marry her at all. Then she said we were basically married because we were living together which didn't make logical

sense to me. Then she tried to guilt trip me by bringing up how I was living in their house rent-free for the last few months and I told them it was not the same as buying a 1.1M house. They kept insisting it was the same principle and that I should give to them what they have given to me without thinking about fairness or equality since we are a family, even though we aren't married yet. I guess deep down, I do still have reservations that there is a small chance they may be conspiring to use me for my money based on the fact that they have been struggling financially

and my GF has not had a stable job, and that they seem quite eager for us to get married and have kids and buy this house all within one year. I have expressed my concern about moving too fast and they were always quick to discredit the opinion of my friends and family and claim that I should only listen to myself or them, they just keep asking me what are you waiting for? And won't accept my answer of, I don't know, I just need more time. Her mom told me I won't ever find someone better and that I need to put a ring on it right away, of course, I cannot discuss my trust issue of the money with them for obvious reasons. I am feeling a bit gaslight here, but I also feel like I could just be being cold-blooded and selfish for thinking about money

and not love. Right now I am torn between feeling like I am being overly paranoid and selfish and insensitive by bringing up who owns the house or whether I am being manipulated and gaslight, would appreciate an unbiased opinion here, thanks. Update, my GF, 30F is mad at me, 27M, for not wanting to put her name on the title of the house. Hey everyone, just wanted to update you all on what happened, so my original post was regarding me and my girlfriend buying a house together and her getting upset that I didn't want to put her name on the house title. As a brief summary, my GF and I have been together for 10 months and started to look around for houses after about six months together. But our relationship

had moved very fast and we moved in together after one month, so we have spent more time together than some couples that have been together for two or three years. Not sure if this matters, though. I have a very stable, high-earning job and she was initially earning a lot when we first met, but fairly soon after she had to change careers and now her income is very unstable. We found a plot of land to build a house worth 1.1m. I put all the money onto the down payment though my GF's mom promised she would contribute $300K, a discussion with her about rights to the house caused her to feel hurt and then her

mom intervened and said some very manipulative things. I reminisced about our relationship. The good. Dash, she is extremely sweet and caring 99% of the time. When we first met, she bought me an iPhone and would buy me thoughtful gifts all the time, even later when her finances were not doing as well. She is also extremely affectionate and even now always displays her affection to me, even when I'm not paying attention. Some have said this is love bombing, though it has been consistent throughout our entire relationship. Dash that 1% was her being upset or frustrated and her tone of voice would be condescending or disrespectful, though we were always able to settle our disagreements very quickly. She was and still is a very reasonable person to talk with and I feel

like we can work together as a team to solve problems. Dash, she is very emotionally mature and often knows me better than I know myself. I have learned so much by being with her and feel I've become a more caring person and in some ways, more confident and capable. Dash, she is very thoughtful and always remembers the little things about me. She remembers all my favorite snacks and buys me them every month, until recently when finances were a struggle. Dash overall when I was with her, I felt happy and full of love, we were basically inseparable, I took a trip with her recently and made unforgettable memories.

The bad. There were a number of red flags our relationship moved very quickly. we moved in after one month of seeing each other. We were spending all day every day together with no boundaries. She had planned out opening up a clinic with me, as the doctor at the clinic, with a 10-year rental contract, which I would be locked into and responsible for paying overhead. I learned soon after we started dating that she was making a lot of money by working for this wealthy doctor who had a romantic interest in her. She cut off all personal contact with him after meeting me, though continued to work with him professionally even after he confessed to her.

For two months, she told me she worked with him until she could find alternate jobs for her friends who worked under her, but it was still suspicious. That said, she never hid anything for me and I always felt I could ask her anything about this. My parents have said for months and that they didn't trust my GF or her mom, based on their words and expressions and red flags as above, not to say Thai have always been right, but they do always have my best interests at heart. She told me very early on, about two, three months in, that she knew I was the one and wanted to spend the rest of her life with me. She wanted to get married but said she would wait for me whenever I was ready. While this felt nice,

I also felt it was suspicious she was so ready to commit after only a short amount of time. She has always been a very headstrong, confident person who didn't question her decisions. Also, she isn't keen on doing housework and will feel tired just from cooking for a few days or washing some dishes. After reminiscing and then sitting at home alone, my heart felt empty without this person. I couldn't reconcile the person I knew and loved from who she could be on the inside, if she really was after my money. I texted her that we should break up and then found a time in person to talk and exchange our belongings. I brought up all of my concerns and told her that I simply cannot trust her anymore.

To her credit, she was very respectful and gentle. It was difficult for me to face her, especially. as she was extremely tearful and looked like she hadn't eaten or slept in two days. Despite this she kept a loving smile on her face, on the surface, she seemed genuine. This is how the discussion went. Dash I told her that her mom was extremely disrespectful to me especially saying that I shouldn't listen to my friend's advice and that I was selfish and cold-blooded to bring up the issue of the house title and rushing me towards marriage slash kids.

She told me that her mom was just very upset that I brought up the issue because in Chinese culture, it is considered very rude to sign any contract or separate out individual rights when it comes to property that is going to be a marriage home. She also said that her mom expected us to be married by the end of the year and so felt that the house ownership was a non-issue, and was just hurt that I mentioned having a plan in case we break up went to her. Breaking up was not a possibility, since she had invited me to live in her home, it meant she already saw me as her son-in-law. Since she was hurt, she said hurtful things without thinking. She also said that her mom was rushing us towards marriage and kids because her mom's

health was not very good history of cancer and felt very unwell, but was afraid to get checked, and didn't think she had much longer to live. She didn't want her daughter to be alone in this world if something were to happen to her. She also said her mom had heard bad things about this friend of mine who gave me the advice to have this conversation, since I told my GF that this friend of mine cheated on his ex-girlfriend and got together with that girl. So her mother felt that my friends were a bad influence on me. She told me she herself never rushed me with marriage or kids, which is true, and it's true that she told me she didn't even like kids in the past, but wanted them because I did. She said we could get married. Whenever I was ready, even if that meant she had to

get a stable job first. Dash I told her that I was very stressed about making the down payment on the house and I had brought this up with them, and they said they didn't have any money at the moment to help. To be fair, her mother helped me get an extension on part of the down payment, 53K out of by talking to the builder, but expressed no intention to pay any of the down payment. She said she asked me whether I had the money to make the down payment, and I said that while difficult, I did have the means to do so, and she said she fully intended to honor her mom's promise to pay $300k toward the mortgage, but the money was not ready yet. She also said that if it meant getting back together, she would be willing to take money out to pay for half of the down payment.

I told her it was too little, too late, and that her previous actions suggested she had no intention to pay at all. Dash I asked her why they started to look around for houses before they had gotten my agreement, and they said at the time they were just browsing the market without an intention to buy, at the time, I was on board with the decision to buy a house, though we didn't discuss any concrete plan for how we would split the mortgage in the future. Also, since her mother had voiced about her culture that it was customary for the husband to buy the wife a house. I was concerned they wanted to put all the burden of paying for the house on me. I expressed that I felt unsupported by her during this time. She said she did ask me if I would be able to pay the mortgage

in the future and showed me some calculations of the future mortgage. I told her it would be difficult and I may need her help. And she said she would help as much as she could, but it wouldn't be 50-50. I was okay with that. However, I told her that based on the fact that they didn't help me with the down payment, and she doesn't have. A stable job right now, I could not count on her to contribute to the house in the future. She promised me she would look for a stable job in the next few months, and that we didn't need to buy the house if I didn't feel ready. Through it all, she was very tearful and seemed genuine, and I was almost swayed. She brought up all the good memories we had, and soon enough I couldn't hold back my tears. Both our places were filled with the memories of things

we had done and bought together, she told. Me, she respected my decision and told me she hoped in the future I would trust my heart and not let others, family and friends, make decisions for me. We both wished each other the best in the future and parted ways. It was kind of open-ended because I did not say that there was no possibility of getting back together in the future. She told me she would wait for me if I ever changed my mind. Afterwards, I went home to my parents' house and analyzed everything that had been said. And all came to the conclusion that even though there was a chance I was wrong and I'd just

let go of someone who truly loved me with all their heart, that there were too many red flags for me to ever fully trust her again. Also, this was the second time I had discussed breaking up with her. The first time was due to opening the clinic after three months, which she agreed not to do anymore. So I gave her another change. So I felt there was no returning from this. Also, my parents reassured me that I am still young and have lots of opportunities, so no need to dwell too much on the unknowns. In the end, I feel that I made the right decision. Although I am lying if I said I didn't have any lingering doubts, thanks for reading. I hope you enjoy. the story. Spouse laments heeding empowering suggestions to broaden their marriage. I'm reaching

out for guidance on how to salvage the remaining fragments of my marriage. Allow me to commence. By saying I've been married to my husband for five years, together for seven. For confidentiality, I'm going to refer to us as James and Schuyler. We met in our second year of Community College. I got a two-year degree in office management and James went on to obtain a four-year degree in business administration from a university that conducts remote classes at the community college. Fast forward to today, I'm 26, James is 27, and we were planning on starting a family later this year. Our dream was to have four kids, ideally two boys and two girls. We had a very happy marriage and our two families loved both of us. Now, here's where I effed up royally.

I developed what some may call a work husband, but in my case it was with a delivery driver for one of the big three delivery organizations who makes deliveries to our office. Let's refer to this man as Jaden for confidentiality's sake. At 25 and single, Jaden has been delivering to my office for nearly two years. From the moment we met, a certain chemistry was present, not romantic necessarily, but an undeniable spark. I was drawn to him and we'd spend at least ten minutes talking every time he made a delivery. I looked forward to seeing him and always made sure I was up front when it was time for his delivery. One day our conversation went further than normal. Jaden said he had

a personal question to ask me. He said it was very personal and didn't want me to be offended or to jeopardize our working relationship. I told him, of course not, you can ask me anything. Jaden then told me, I feel a very strong attraction to you and wondered if you felt it too. I found his boldness surprising and somewhat embarrassing. After taking a moment to gather my thoughts, I told him the truth. I told him I definitely felt it too. Jaden confessed that he would have asked me out if I weren't married. I thanked him for the compliment and that was the end of our conversation. He left, and that was that. For the next week, we just made brief, awkward, small talk when he came in to deliver packages. I was very concerned and felt guilty that I may

have crossed a line with him. I just couldn't shake this feeling. At home, James and I were enjoying married life. Let me state clearly, I have always been totally satisfied with James as a lover, friend and husband, and believe at the time, he would have said the same about me. He was perfect for me. That being said, I foolishly started dreaming about how I could selfishly have both my loving husband and some kind of relationship with Jaden, beyond just our work conversations. Later, I learned that this is sometimes called being a cake eater. I started to look into it and found some articles about polyamory and open marriages. I thought these ideas were silly and gross, so I didn't think about them much at the time.

I also knew that my husband wouldn't agree to such a thing. Even if he did, it could hurt our marriage and both our families might stop talking to us. That's something I didn't want to happen. went by and my married life was going great as always, but I kept thinking about making a connection with Jaden. I started researching the subject again, and came across a post online titled It Doesn't Hurt to Ask. It was a blog post by a woman who claimed to be in a successful open marriage. She wrote about how she loved her husband, but also wanted to be in a relationship with a man she met while doing volunteer work. The blogger wrote that she just didn't know how to

approach the subject with her husband, without destroying their marriage. She kept these feelings bottled up for over two years, and then one day when they were on a long drive, she just decided to ask him. To her surprise, he was very interested. Long story short, they open their marriage and they both now have partners outside the marriage that they see three to four times per month. The blogger claimed they've been doing this for four years now and their marriage is stronger than ever and they are both happier than ever. Her story caught my attention because it was exactly what I wanted, but was too scared to ask my husband about. Then one Sunday morning, as we were lounging around the house, surfing the web on our phones and chatting casually, I decided to bring up the subject and

asked him directly. I just read this online post about open marriages. What's your opinion on them? He then asked me if I was talking about couples sleeping with other people. I confirmed, and asked him again what he thought about it. He said he thought it was disgusting and that people should just get divorced if they want to sleep around. I told him it's really becoming popular here in the US and in many Western countries. James' facial expression indicated he was just disgusted by the subject, so I just quickly changed the subject. Based on his reaction, I planned to never bring up the subject again, as the last thing I wanted was to jeopardize our marriage, as it was great. A couple weeks go by and James and I are cuddling in bed high on love after just

having fantastic sexy time. I'm laying on his chest and can't see his face and out of the blue. He asks, who did you have in mind when you brought up open marriages last week? I was startled, and got a pit in my stomach. I slowly raised my head and turned to look at him and said, What are you talking about? What do you mean? James then shared that he had read some research suggesting that if a woman mentions an open relationship to her partner, she has either already cheated, or she has someone else lined up. His revelations startled me, actually, it shook me to my core. James could see the effect his words had on me and said, I know you too well. I can tell you're hiding something. So be honest. I fell silent, looked away, and then told him that I had

never cheated on him and would never do so. I could have left it at that, but I didn't. I then admitted that if we ever considered an open marriage, there was a friend at work who I might consider. James asked, tell me about this, work friend. So, I began to explain about Jaden and our interactions up until then, including what Jaden had told me about his feelings, but didn't disclose I had reciprocated the same feelings back to him. James's next words freaked me out. He said, you know, technically, you've already cheated on me. I became irritated and responded defiantly, insisting that I hadn't, but he countered, yes, the relationship you have with this Jaden guy is what is termed an emotional affair. I had never heard of this concept before,

so James explained it to me. I was getting more and more frustrated, and James suggested we stopped discussing it for now as he needed to get some sleep due to an early start the following day. He fell asleep quickly, but I couldn't. Instead, I grabbed my phone and began to research emotional affairs, reading numerous articles and posts about them. James was right, what I had with Jaden was dangerously close to being an emotional affair. No, let me correct that, it was indeed a full-blown emotional affair. I felt horrible, as though I had betrayed my husband.

Unable to sleep, I got out of bed, went downstairs, and made myself. some tea. I eventually fell asleep on the couch around 4 a.m. At about 6.45 a.m., James woke me with a kiss, saying he was leaving for work and I needed to start my day as it was almost 7 a.m. As usual, I returned his kiss and told him I loved him, but this time, I put even more emphasis on the sentiment. My mind clouded with guilt over my feelings for Jaden. Several days passed, and once again we were lying in bed after making love when James suddenly said, he'd be willing to try an open marriage if I really wanted to. This took me aback, and I asked, why are you bringing this up now?

He explained that he'd been thinking about our discussions and figured we should try it while we were young, if it was something we desired. I expressed interest but vowed never to jeopardize our marriage or love, as he was the most important person in my life. James responded by saying, if our bond of love is strong, it will withstand infidelity. I countered that a mutual open relationship wouldn't be considered infidelity because we would both be agreeing to it. Instead of commenting on that, he simply said, consider our marriage open, starting right now. I was taken aback once more and urged him to slow down, saying we needed to establish ground rules. He specified that the only ground rules he

wanted were one. We needed to announce who we planned to sleep with and when, in advance, too. We had to disclose the encounter to each other afterward without going into graphic detail, and three, protection must be used for all forms of sexy time, no exceptions. I agreed to his stipulations and proposed adding a couple more points, four. We would keep our open marriage confidential, and five, we would promise each other that these extramarital relationships wouldn't destroy our marriage and we would remain together. James stated that he could not agree to either of these conditions. When I asked why, he simply said he didn't and wouldn't agree to these stipulations and

did not want to discuss it further. I felt very uneasy about this as this was totally out of character for James, but I cuddled up to him and we fell asleep. My discussions with James left me uneasy about the whole open relationship thing, like he had some ulterior motive. So for the next month, I did not pursue the open relationship and we lived our lives normally. During this time, I stayed distant from Jaden at work. only having short, basic discussions with him about the weather and how busy he was and how busy I was.

Superficial things like that. Then one day, Jaden told me that he really missed our conversations and asked me what was wrong. I told him that I was busy here at the office and at home, and just didn't have time to talk lately. In my head, I was thinking about if I should tell him about my open marriage. There I decided I would. How I wish I could turn back time and undo this decision. It didn't seem appropriate to have such a discussion at the office. So instead, I invited him to meet for a drink after work that day, to which he agreed. We met at a local bar that had an outdoor patio, perfect for the warm, early spring weather. I told him about my recently opened marriage and came right out and asked him if he'd be interested

in a relationship with me. He didn't hesitate and said yes. He said he's been waiting for me to come around and hasn't pushed out of respect, but said, He said he had been having dreams about me for months now. Most of our conversation during that meetup was flirtatious in nature. It was a Tuesday, and we agreed to meet the following day for our first romantic encounter at his apartment, right after work. However, I emphasized that I'd need to leave by 6.30 p.m. to return home to my husband, who remained my utmost priority.

That night, I returned home and prepared a lovely dinner for James. After dinner, I informed him about my discussion and meeting with Jaden earlier that day, and that we had scheduled a date for the following day after work at his place, provided James was still comfortable with proceeding with our open marriage. I could tell James was taken aback as he responded, Oh, yes, okay. So you're going to meet him tomorrow? I confirmed, but reassured him that we could still call it off as my main priority was him and us.

He insisted, no, let's do this. We hugged, but I sensed stiffness and distance in his embrace, unlike our usual ones. I attributed this to nerves. We didn't talk much that evening as he was occupied with work in his office, and I had my own office tasks to complete. When we went to bed, I spooned with him and tried to initiate intimacy, but he mentioned he was too fatigued and needed to rest. The next morning when I woke up, James had already left, leaving a text explaining he had an

early meeting which he had forgotten to tell me about. He added that he'd see me that night. This was unlike him, but I dismissed it and continued with my routine of getting dressed and heading to work. I chose a particularly cute outfit that day, aware that Jaden and I were going to meet right after work. Throughout the day, I texted James but received no responses. I was once again considering canceling the date with Jaden. Telling you my story, I really wish I had. when at 4.17 p.m., I received a text from James. He wrote that he loved me and would see me that night. This brought a sense of relief and I took it as a green signal from him to go ahead.

I'll jump straight into it. Jaden and I met and the sexy time was great. Not quite to the satisfaction level I have with James and definitely no feelings of love. But very fulfilling, mostly because of the sheer lust and forbidden aspect of what we were doing. I left his place after about an hour and a half and got home just after 6.40 p.m. to my surprise. James was not home yet. I was okay with this as it gave me time to shower and put my clothes in the washing machine to remove Jaden's cologne smell. I didn't want James to be exposed to this. Though I felt fulfilled physically, I had a deep feeling of guilt, shame and remorse and just felt dirty.

I had a real tug of war going on in my mind and was nervous. I decided. I decided that I would prepare a quick but great dinner for James and lit candles to create a romantic mood. I wanted to make sure that he knew how much I loved him, and that the physical affair with Jaden meant absolutely nothing to me. It was just physical, and was nothing even close to the love and physical fulfillment I have with him. I was hoping that we would end our night making love. I know some of you may think this is selfish and downright gross, but keep in mind, I use protection for everything I did with Jaden and no body stuff of any kind were exchanged. At 7.30 p.m., James still wasn't home and I tried calling him, but it went straight to voicemail,

so I texted him stating I was home and at dinner waiting. I heard nothing from him. It was now 8.50 p.m. and I was getting worried. I kept calling him and leaving messages and sending texts. At around 9.30 p.m., I got a text from him stating, don't wait up, I'll be home late. I texted back asking where he was and who he was with, but he didn't text back. I was exhausted and fell asleep sometime after midnight. I was awoken by the sound of the shower and the spare bathroom running and got up to investigate. The door was locked, totally uncharacteristic for James, so I knocked but he didn't answer. Then ten minutes or so later, James emerges with a towel wrapped around him and said,

Hey, how was your night? I told him it was fine but then he directly asked me, did you sexy time, Jaden? I asked him not to use that term, but then admitted that yes, Jaden and I had been together. I then asked where he had been. He said he had spent the night at several bars and had been out dancing. I asked who he was with, as I could smell perfume on his discarded clothes. I asked, who is this her? He stated that since they didn't sleep together, he didn't need to tell me who she was. I can't say the explicit words here, but I can add that he never used the F word to me, so his way of talking to me and using that word, made me very worried. I then asked him why he

used the guest bathroom to shower, and he told me he would be using the guest bedroom and bathroom until I took two STD tests. His words crushed me, and I responded, what? This wasn't part of our rules. I made sure Jadin used protection for everything we did. He retorted, have you never heard of oral HPV or oral herpes? I'm not getting within six feet of you until you're cleared. You can consider this my version of social distancing. I was incredibly upset, crying, and told James the first wanted to close our marriage, as this was the last thing I had wanted to happen. James retorted, no way, you had your turn, and now I'm going to have mine. Upset, I kept crying as he simply stated that he was going to bed because he had an early meeting

and needed rest. I spent most of the night crying my eyes out, eventually falling asleep on the couch. By the time I awoke, James had already slipped out. He had sent me a text saying, Don't wait up for me. I tried calling him, but he didn't pick up. I sent texts and left messages throughout the day, but he never responded. I was sick and felt like I was going insane, thinking I had likely destroyed my marriage. We didn't have any deliveries that day. so I didn't see Jaden, but I called him at 4.30 p.m. and asked if we could meet tonight. He agreed and mentioned that I sounded upset. I told him that I was, but said we'd discuss it when I got to his place. We met and I told him I wanted to end our relationship, admitting it was a

big mistake, as I loved my husband and wanted only him. I explained the situation and he understood. The only thing he asked for was one more hookup, after which he'd never interact with me again other than for work purposes. I agreed, and we had a very short hookup, nothing but straight vanilla position which lasted less than ten minutes. Afterwards, he told me, that was terrible, you just laid there like a tree trunk. I apologized, admitting that this whole thing was a big mistake and it wasn't his fault. I got dressed, gave him a final hug, and left. Before I left, Jaden said, I'll never understand women like you. I asked what he meant by the comment, and he simply said nothing, no comment with a look of complete disgust on his face.

I quickly left, crying the entire drive home. How could I have been so stupid? I destroyed my marriage, for what? For nothing at all. I thought I had to be the stupidest person in the world, and again, just felt dirty. James didn't come home until 1 a.m. that night. I was sick, knowing that I had single-handedly ruined my life. On Friday, James did the same thing and left before I got up and sent me a text stating, Don't wait up for me. This distance and coldness were crushing to my soul. I loved spending time with my husband in the mornings, evenings, and weekends, preparing his meals, cuddling, taking walks after dinner, and just talking about stupid stuff. This was all gone, and I missed it so bad. I texted James and said I wanted to talk to

talk with him tomorrow morning, and he texted back and said, okay, as long as it was first thing as he was leaving for the day. I responded back asking where he was going, but he didn't reply. He didn't get home until 1.30 a.m. I didn't say anything and just laid in bed crying. He again took a shower and just went straight to bed. I woke early to wait for James to get up. He came into the kitchen at 7 a.m. and poured some orange juice. The vibe was very very, very cold and emotionless. He made no eye contact and just sat down at the table with me and started looking at his phone. I got up and went over and plop down on his lap and said, look at me. He looked away but I said, look at me, and gently grabbed his face looking into his brown eyes.

I told him that I loved him with all my heart and that I made a bad decision, not a bad mistake, a bad decision. I told him I was sorry and would do anything to regain his trust and love. He He didn't say anything and just looked at me like I was insane. I asked him if he loved me and he said nothing. I said, James, please answer me. He said he didn't know. I just started crying and said, I can make this right. He told me, I don't think you can.

I then called him a bastard and said, you planned all this. You set me up to divorce me, didn't you? He said he didn't, but did admit as soon as I brought up the concept of an open marriage. He knew our marriage was likely over based on what he had read. I then asked him why didn't he just shut me down and demand that I end all contact with Jaden. He said, you can't force someone to be faithful, you either are or you're not, and you obviously are not a monogamous person. I just cried and told him I was and to not throw us away.

He said nothing, just got up and said he was leaving. I asked where he was going, and he said he'd be back after midnight. I then reminded him that tomorrow was Easter Sunday, and we were scheduled to leave at 7 a.m. to drive to my parents' house. My family absolutely adores my husband and we spend nearly every holiday with them as his parents now live in Florida. He told me that he wasn't going. I was shocked and devastated and asked him to please come with me, and he just coldly said no. I asked him what I was going to tell my parents and he said he didn't care, then said, just tell them the truth. I begged and pleaded with him to stay home with me, but he just got dressed, took a gym bag of clothes and left the house.

I am destroyed inside and feel totally deflated. I want to ask you all here for any suggestions and steps I can take to save my marriage. I'd really like to hear from any people who have done something similar with open marriages and whether a couple can recover from such a betrayal. I'd really like to hear from people who have successfully reconciled after an open relationship. Thank you for being here listening to my story. I'm going back to bed now to cry for the rest of the day. Update 1, I wanted to give everyone an update. First, I want to thank those of you who responded with feedback and support.

It really helped me get through the last couple of days. There were a lot of people who rightfully criticized me and called me nasty names, but I deserve it and I appreciate your feedback too. Easter Sunday and today have been very difficult days for me. Two of the worst days of my life. I drove to my parents' home and when I arrived, the first thing they asked me was, Where's James? I lied and told them that he had an emergency at work and would not be able to make it.

I told them this as I did not want to upset our family gathering. My family bought my story, but grew suspicious as the day went on as I was not texting or calling my husband like I normally do. To deflect their suspicion, I sent several fake texts to throw them off and acted like I received texts back from him and told everyone he was still busy at the office and would call me tomorrow. Truth is, he never called or texted me, not even to see if I arrived safely. This broke my heart. I planned to stay over at my parents' house and tell them about our marital problems on Monday. I dreaded doing so as I knew they were going to berate and hate me. Well, I told them this morning

and it went just as I predicted. They yelled, called me terrible names, said they didn't raise me like this and a bunch of other things. They called my sister to join us and she proceeded to ream me out too. I cried and told them I was sorry. I told them I know what I've done is terrible and that I have learned from this and will never make the mistake again in the future. I told them my sole focus for the foreseeable future is to win back the love and trust of James. At the end, though they were very upset with me, they told me they loved me and would pray that our marriage can be salvaged. I drove home Monday evening. During the day, I called and texted James but he did not reply. When I arrived home, I found a note on the counter stating he had gone to Florida to visit his parents and would

return on Sunday. I felt so bad, as we planned on going to visit them sometime in early May and now, because of me, that's not going to happen. I hate myself. That's all I've got to say for now. I'm just really depressed and sad. What scares me is I'm no longer crying. The hurt and remorse I feel is so deep inside me now. Tears are worthless. Update two, it's been almost a year and I didn't plan on posting again, but there was such an outpouring of interest from the community, I decided to. Well, I have bad news, and some good news. First the bad news, I am divorced. It was final back in December. In the end, James decided he couldn't remain married to me after I was with another man.

He said he could never trust me again and was embarrassed to be seen in public with me. He feels divorcing gave him his masculinity back. I disagree as he never lost his masculinity, and no one knows about my brief connection with Jaden except for our families, but okay, whatever. Now for the good news, no strike that, the great news. James and I started dating again last month. We got back together on Valentine's Day and it's been fantastic. We only see each other whenever he wants, which has been about once a week, but our passion level

is off the charts, way higher than when we first got together seven years ago. Now, he's made it clear to me that this is only a physical thing and that we will never again be married, live together or be a couple ever again. I'm okay with this. Well, not really, but I'll take what I can get. My goal is to win back James. And if I can't do that, I want to have his babies, now. Now don't get the wrong idea.

I would never baby trap him. I just would like to have children with this man. I've thought out how we could share custody and make this all work without being married. I know it sounds crazy, but I love him and don't want children with anyone else. I know doing so would likely jeopardize any potential relationship I might have with another man, but I don't want anyone else but James. That's all I have to share now. And I'll probably not post again unless something major happens, but I would love, love, love to get your feedback on my situation.

Do you think I'm crazy for dating James? Should I just try to move on and find another love and start a family with that person instead? P.S. Jaden is not an option and never was. He was just a bad decision I made and will never make again. Thank you. I hope you enjoy this story. My partner attempted to have me agree to a deal for 40% of my earnings because she intends to work as a singer the evening prior to our marriage. Therefore, I agreed to it.

Read it out loud at the altar and left her. So I was supposed to get married last week, but unfortunately, it didn't happen. I pulled off a pretty gutsy stunt in front of all my friends and family and now, my ex-fianceess family and my own family are both extremely upset with me. For context, my fiancé, Chelsea, 26F, and I, 28M, had been together for the past three years. We met through friends and even though we knew that we were very different from each other, we hid it off and after dating for a year, she moved in with me as well. We were getting serious, and eventually, we had a talk about our future and we decided that we were sure about each other. We agreed that we wanted to marry each other and start a family before 30 and she also made it

known to me that after having kids, she didn't want to work anymore. She wanted to devote her time to her children and would be a stay-at-home mom. I was completely fine with that because I work in a tech company, I make good money so I believe that I would be able to support my family. And Chelsea was not going to quit her job until we had our first kid, so I had assumed that since she would be working until then, we would also have saved enough money together. This is why I don't understand why she came up with some stupid contract, which she wanted me to sign and agree that I would give up 40% of my income every month and transfer it to her account so her future would be secure. As if the contract was not bad enough, she decided to spring it on me about a day before

the wedding, knowing that I wouldn't be able to do anything at the time. It was just the way she had been so sneaky about everything that ticked me off. Because I had proposed to her almost 10 months back, so she had it almost a year to tell me about her plans. We could have discussed this, I could have spoken to her and we could have come to a common ground. But instead, she tried to deceive me. The day before the wedding, my mother-in-law Donna decided to visit me in the evening with the contract. After she showed the legal document to me and explained it all, I couldn't believe it. I thought that it was Donna trying to pull a fast one on me, so I decided to go speak to Chelsea about it in person.

Donna and I went to her room to settle this, and that's when Chelsea told me that this had actually been her idea and my world came crashing down around me. She told me that she had been thinking about this for a couple of months leading up to the wedding, and because this was kind of sensitive, she couldn't think of an appropriate way to bring this up. But now apparently, before she committed to the wedding, she wanted me to sign this contract of hers so she would have some sort of financial security. I was obviously very upset.

I tried to reason with her because it was literally the day before the wedding and I couldn't think of any other way to deal with the situation. I tried to tell her that 40% of my income is a lot of money and since she wouldn't even be quitting her job until she had her first child, I couldn't understand why she needed this so quickly. I also couldn't understand why she had drawn up legal paperwork for something like this because it just made me feel like she didn't trust me. We had an argument, she told me that I was reading too much into this and I was upset with her because she had been very sneaky about this whole thing. After a while, she put her foot down and she told me that she was not getting married if I did not sign that contract and that was it. So in the heat of the moment, I decided to just put on an act, and I smiled and signed the contract and then I left and went back to my room without another word. but I was obviously not done with it, I was hurt, and I felt betrayed and so, I decided that I was going to address this at the wedding in front of everyone. I don't know if it was right or wrong,

I guess I'm going to find out from the comments. But at that point, I just wanted to humiliate Chelsea and her mother because I was incredibly disappointed with both of them. Anyway, the next day, everything went smoothly up until the point at which we were supposed to be at the altar. She said her vows, and I was supposed to say mine, but instead, I brought out the contract from my pocket and I read it out to everyone publicly. Obviously everyone was very confused and I could see Chelsea going red in the face, but I didn't stop. I went on to explain the contract to everyone and I told them that this wedding was no longer happening because obviously, Chelsea did not trust me and after what had happened the previous evening, I did not

trust her either. Because she had chosen to be sneaky with me and tried to trick me into committing to something like this instead of doing the normal thing, having a discussion with me, and coming to a conclusion that both of us found acceptable. After a relationship of almost three years, if we couldn't even trust each other, then there was no point in getting married and ruining each other's lives. After that, I tore up that contract into as many pieces as I could, and then walked out of the venue without even looking back. I got to into my car and since I had already packed my bags and put them in my trunk, all I had to do was drive for a while and find a different hotel, and that's where I've been staying since.

Both our families pretty much lost their minds after my stunt at the wedding and had been going off about it. Apparently, the situation after I walked out had been predictably chaotic because Chelsea broke down into tears, and her family started trying to comfort her, and my family started trying to do some damage control with the guests and stuff. Once the situation had been brought under control and most of the guests had left, our families had a long discussion and both of them had agreed that what I did was completely unnecessary. Even if I did not want to marry Chelsea after finding out about the contract and stuff,

I could have just told her about it and avoided all that drama. They said that the fact that I even had a chance to sleep on it and do the right thing, I had chosen to humiliate Chelsea publicly and make our families the laughing stuff. of all the guests present at the wedding, and apparently that makes me even worse than Chelsea because at least what she had done had only hurt me. But what I had done had hurt Chelsea, her family, and even my family. So now they want me to issue a public apology for my behavior and tell people that I've been going through a lot of stuff mentally, which is why I did that. I don't think that's fair, though, because I haven't been going through a lot of stuff.

I just thought that what Chelsea and her mother had tried to do was disgusting and I didn't like it. it. Yes, I will admit that what I did was dramatic and theatrical, but I cannot say that it was an overreaction. I think she totally deserved it and I really don't understand why my family thinks that this ruined their reputation. Or why they think they have a reputation that can be ruined in the first place because as far as I know, we are really not that important. People will gossip about this for a couple of days and then forget about it. But at least I will have the satisfaction of knowing that I got back at somebody who tried to screw me over for the rest of my life. And if not the satisfaction, at least I'll have a cool story to tell people.

But the truth is, I don't do it for either of those reasons, I just did it because I was very upset that almost three years of my life had been completely wasted with Chelsea. And honestly, I do want to get married and start a family. Now, I'm going to have to start all over again with somebody else and I don't even know if it's going to be the same again. I'm also very upset about a lot of other things because I really love Chelsea and I still have a soft corner for her which is why I'm even bothering to rethink what I did. Anyway, since almost a week has passed since the incident, I've started to have second thoughts but I still don't feel too inclined to publicly apologize to anyone. I'd offer not wanting to

publicly apologize after I humiliated my ex-fiancee, her family, and even my family at our wedding which never ended up happening. Edit, just to be clear, I don't have a problem with the fact that she was demanding money for her future. I think that was pretty clear, I had mentioned it in the beginning that she had told me that she wanted to be a stay-at-home mom after she had kids and I was completely cool with it. In fact, even if she had come up with a pre-nup or something, I would have been fine with that too. All I had wanted and expected from her was an honest and upfront discussion about all this.

It's not like we have never spoken about finances, we have been together for three years and have lived together for two. Of course, we discussed our finances and we had always had a clear line of communication with each other, at least about these things. I really can't understand why she couldn't feel comfortable enough to bring this up with me in the past. It's not like I had ever given her a reason to doubt me either. And unlike what a lot of you are suggesting, I'm not even actually that mad about the fact that you, she demanded a part of my salary for herself. But the fact that she wanted me to start sending her money right after we got married, did not sit right with me because as far as I was concerned, I had believed that she would only quit her job after we had kids. Then, of course,

it would be a different story because our living arrangements would be much different. But for now, we could have just stuck to whatever we had been doing for the past two years. I know that I am a bit all over the place right now, but honestly, this really hurts. I've tried my best to be a good boyfriend to her and always respected her decisions. And to find out that she had tried to deceive me and trick me into something like this, it's just weird. There was no need for it. And I don't understand why she ruined everything that we had with this contract situation. Anyway, the damage has already been done now and right now, both our families are against me and she hasn't even bothered to speak to me ever since I walked out.

I don't even have any expectations from anybody at the moment. I'm just hoping that this blows over soon and I can start trying to move on from everything. Update 1, hi, thanks for all the comments and advice. It's been a couple of days since I posted and I have not made up my mind about what I want to do yet. I'm definitely not apologizing to anyone, that's for sure. I haven't spoken to Chelsea or her family because I really don't think that I owe them an answer. I'm not married to Chelsea, they are not going to be my in-laws anymore. And as far as I'm concerned, we are done.

I don't think there is any chance of us ever patching up again, so we are over for good. And that just leaves my family to deal with, so that's the only thing I cared about. I had been ignoring them for the last couple of days because I didn't know what to say to them. But then yesterday, I finally spoke to my parents. I wanted to speak to them in person, but they couldn't make them. the trip, so we had to have the conversation on FaceTime. I explained my situation to them, and while talking to them, I actually ended up finally crying about it. I have been holding back my feelings for the last week, ever since the incident took place, and I guess that finally

made them realize how shattered I was and they started trying to comfort me. They finally started to try and understand where I was coming from instead of constantly attacking me, telling me that I had ruined the reputation and all that. I talked about my feelings to them, and I told them that I knew for a fact what I had done. Maybe it was unnecessary, but at least I got the satisfaction of knowing that at least I had done something. I hadn't let her walk all over me and even if it was petty, I needed that. I didn't care what other people thought of me, it only mattered what the people I cared about thought. I hadn't spoken to any of my friends, but I knew that they were with me on this one, thanks to all the supportive messages and emails that they had left for me, so that

only left my parents. I told them that I really needed them to be by my side because I was going through something really difficult and I even told them that I could understand where they were coming from as well, as why they were concerned about our family's reputation. But I also explained that we are not exactly public figures. People are going to gossip about this for a while, but then they're going to move on to the next big thing. Being afraid of people got to. gossiping about us is no reason for them to be fighting with me, especially when I need them the most. And when they finally understood that, we were able to clear the air. TLDR, my parents and I were able to come to a common ground and things are fine between us now.

Update 2, hi, it's been three days since my last update, and yesterday, really late in the evening, I made up my mind that today, I was going to go back home. After all, I paid half of the rent too, and honestly, I couldn't afford to stay in the hotel forever. I had to go back at some point and I think Chelsea should be the one who has to leave. I don't understand why she hasn't bothered to contact me at all, but well, I packed my stuff up and I went back home this morning. Ever since the incident at the wedding, it had only been Chelsea's parents who had been trying desperately to get in touch with me, but she hadn't said anything. So, I had been quite nervous about showing up at home because I didn't know what to expect. I did have my keys with me, so I got them just fine, and surprisingly when I walked I realized

that the place was a lot emptier than before, and after walking around for a bit and looking at stuff, I realized that Chelsea had moved out. And she hadn't bothered to say anything to me, probably because she didn't want to talk to me. I couldn't understand that, and it was completely fine with me. I didn't have anything to say to her either, but I was just glad that she had moved out without me having to tell her and now I could stay in my own home without worrying too much about the arrangements. I don't know where she went, I'm guessing that she moved back in with her parents or maybe a friend, but it doesn't matter anymore. It has been a significant amount of time since the wedding and now that I was back in the comfort of my own home, I decided to start replying to everybody who had texted me. Until now, I had only spoken to my parents because I didn't want to talk to anyone else. Frankly speaking, I wouldn't even have spoken to my parents if they hadn't been offended by my actions at the wedding and I had to fix things with them.

Anyway, I started responding to messages and emails and stuff and I told my friends how I was doing. Most of them were concerned about me, none of them really brought up Chelsea at all because I guess they didn't want to bring up anything sensitive. I told them that I was doing better now, which is not exactly entirely true because I'm still struggling to fall asleep at night and come to terms with the fact that Chelsea is truly gone now, but it's not like they can do anything about it, so that's what I'm going with. Anyway, I am trying to get back to normal because I've gone back to work. I'm working from home right now because I really can't face my co-workers after the fiasco even though they told me that they totally understand and they're not going to judge me.

But I guess I just need some more time to accept things myself. Anyway, at least I've come back home, that's a big move by itself too. Baby steps from here on. Update 3. It's been three weeks since the wedding and until now, I haven't been responding to Chelsea's parents. They have been texting me nonstop and trying to get through to me about something or the other, but I really don't want to talk to them. I haven't even been reading those messages because I was sure that it was all. all pointless. In the beginning, they wanted me to issue a public apology for my behavior at the

wedding and I just assumed that given the recent messages, that's what they would be going on about since they still haven't received what they want. But today, they actually showed up at my house and started demanding that I speak to them. I was kind of alarmed, but I decided to talk to them and get it over with once and for all because this was starting to get on my nerves now. So I asked them what they wanted and they told me that they wanted me to repay them the amount that they had contributed to the wedding. I was shocked because that was a pretty bizarre request since as far as I was concerned, the wedding had actually taken place and it's not like we had cancelled anything. And our families had contributed to the wedding equally, so I couldn't understand why they were demanding money from me. I obviously made it very clear to them that I was not repaying anything to them and told them to get away if that's what they were here for.

But they told me that I was being unfair because they had spent a bomb on the wedding as well but because of me, it had all been ruined. So now, I owe it to them to pay them back because it was my ego that had ruined everything. They even said that, unlike my family, they couldn't afford to throw that kind of money away and since I had been responsible for the wedding getting called off, I had to do the right thing now. The way they were accusing me of being egoistic and putting the blame on me, just made me really upset. Besides, I haven't exactly been doing well for the past couple of weeks, so I lost it at them. I stepped out of my house and started screaming in their faces, that they were really shocked by this behavior, but I couldn't care less, I just went on and on.

They had messed up by trying to kick me when I was down already. I told them that it was not my fault that their daughter didn't have the guts to come talk to me like a normal person and had to spring the contract on me like a surprise at the very last minute. And if they really didn't think that there was anything wrong with that, either they had very screwed up definitions of right and wrong or maybe that's just how their family was, they functioned like that and expected me to adapt to it, but I'm sorry, I'm not one for deception and I don't take it kindly either. I also told them that I had always treated Chelsea with love and respect, but the night before the wedding, when I confronted her about the contract situation,

I realized that if I did end up marrying her, it would be the biggest mistake that I ever made. And I'm really happy that I decided to walk out and if they really want to talk about ego, they should probably go ahead and talk to their daughter about it because she's the one who ruined everything with her ego. Even the evening before the wedding, it would have been very easy for her to just apologize to me and we could have talked things out. I was ready to do that for her because we spent a lot of time together, we know each other really well and I wasn't willing to give up on us. But clearly, she was willing to do so because

she had clearly said that if I did not sign that contract and get married to her on her terms, then she would not get married at all. So naturally, it was clear that her ego was more important to her than getting married to her fiancé. She's the one who ruined everything, and Donna was the one who stood by her every step of the way. As for the money, I didn't even owe them a penny because it had been their choice to contribute to the wedding expenses. Nobody had talked them into agreeing to it or forced them to do so, so to ask me to repay them and bring my family and stuff, was completely unnecessary. They were just trying to create drama out of nothing and I was not going to have it because their daughter has created enough of a nuisance in my life already,

I don't need more. After I was done screaming at them, they tried to argue, but I wasn't in the mood to have it. So I walked back inside, slammed the door as hard as I could, and told them to get the heck off my front porch where there would be serious consequences. They decided to take that seriously, finally, and got back into their car and drove away. Once that was done, I took a couple of minutes to calm down and then, I decided that I was going to have to speak to Chelsea about this. Because this sort of behavior was completely unacceptable and she needed to bring her parents under control. I had no idea if they had shown up with Chelsea's knowledge or not, but I still called her up, and that was the first time that I spoke to her since the wedding. She didn't

answer the first few times that I called her, but when I didn't stop, she finally picked up, and she sounded pretty annoyed. But then, before she could say anything to make the situation worse, I decided to fill her in on what her parents had just done. I told her how they had shown up, blamed me for everything and we had just had a shouting match with each other. From her reaction, I guess that she had no idea about this. And after I told her everything, she immediately started apologizing to me and dropped the annoyed act. She told me that she had no idea that her parents were going to do something, she was at work and she had already tried to tell her parents not to bother me

after they started bombarding me with messages and phone calls, trying to get me to apologize publicly. She said that he was not even on board. with that and had told them not to bother me anymore, but they hadn't stopped and she felt terrible about this. It was obvious that she was quite embarrassed, so I didn't want to make her feel worse, which is why I just told her that it was fine that they had shown up today, but after this, I wouldn't want them coming around anymore, and I hoped that she would understand. She agreed and we were silent for a couple of minutes before we ended the phone call after

saying goodbye to each other. Of course, there were a lot of things that we did not say, but it It made me very emotional to hear her voice after so long. I don't know if it was the same for her or not, but I know that I felt kind of strange. At least this conversation did not end on a better note and we did not bring up anything that had happened at the wedding, but it's not like we don't need to talk about it and address that at some point. I don't know why, even though we have broken up for good, I feel like I still need to talk to her and get some closure.

I mean, after being together for three whole years, I think that's the least that we're we can ask of each other. But this conversation was nice too, I just really hope that she reaches out to me at some point later on and we get to talk about whatever had happened at the wedding. Anyway, until then, I'm going to continue trying to move on. I've started planning out what I want to do for the future because now that all my plans for the past three years have been derailed, I need to think of something so I don't lose hope. I've been thinking about starting my own business, and in a couple of days, I'm going to talk to my father about it in get him to come on board as an investor or something. I'm hoping that things go well, let's see.

I probably won't be very active in the next couple of weeks, unless something worth mentioning happens. So until then, goodbye, and thank you for all the advice and support. Update 4, hi, three months have passed since my last update and a lot of things have changed. I've made some progress and hopefully, I'll be ready to start in the next few months. Of course, I'm going to getting a lot of help from my dad, and it's nice to see that we have bounced back so well from our last disagreement. From the time of my wedding. We hardly even remember it anymore, and I'm on good terms with my parents. And Chelsea's parents haven't bothered me ever since that last fight either, so that's great. I'm getting back to normal now, I'm spending more time with my friends and family,

and obviously nobody brings up Chelsea or the wedding, but they do try to be more gentle with me. I'm not complaining, I guess I could deal with that and as long as they are not pitying me, I'm fine with it. Now, coming to Chelsea, I had said that I would like to get closure from our situation and that finally happened two weeks ago. It was completely unintentional, I was just at a bar with a couple of my friends and she happened to be there too. But she wasn't out with her friends, she was out with some guy and initially, I thought she was out on a date, so I was very upset. I didn't go up to her for that reason, even though I had spotted her and nobody else had. But before I left, she came up to me after she had seen me there, and she told me that she wanted to speak to me.

By then, the other guy had left, and she explained to me that she was not out on a date, that guy happened to be a family friend and he was waiting for somebody else because he had traveled here to meet his long-distance girlfriend for the first time, she was just with him for company. I felt much better after that explanation, and it also made me realize that I still had feelings for her somewhere deep down. But I'm not going back, don't worry about that. I don't think she wants to come back either, so we are on the same page regarding that. She just wanted me to know that she was not out on any dates, because she didn't want me to get the wrong idea, and think that she was already going out with other people when it had only been three months since our wedding got

called off. Anyway, we spoke to each other privately in a different part of the bar for a while, and my friends waited for me because, of course, this was important. We talked about the wedding, she apologized for everything, and she told me that what she had done was completely unnecessary. And she also agreed that she had been trying to sneak it on to me, at a point where I wouldn't be able to do anything about it. She acknowledged that she had been wrong and she could have dealt with the situation better, especially given the fact that she was a point of the way. we had always been open and honest with each other when we were together, and I had always been respectful of what she had wanted. She ended up crying a bit and I got very emotional, but at least

we got everything out of the way. We parted ways as, not friends, but at least not enemies, if that makes sense. I guess this was the closure I needed. So I'm fine with stuff now and I'm ready to start a new chapter without the baggage of my past, I guess. I hope you enjoy this story. The elderly gentleman provided me with funds to support my enterprise as a birthday gift. However, the following day my guardians insisted on payment for accommodation since I became of legal age and instructed me to bear a substantial financial burden. Loaned to fix my brother's mess. On my 18th birthday, my grandpa surprised me with a life-changing gift.

He gave me a pretty huge amount of money to invest in my dream business. I had always wanted to start a custom stationery and office supplies business from personal planners to branded office kits. I ended up really getting into it in 2020 because I had nothing much to do. I love stationary and graphic design, and I had a small online business, but I really wanted to expand it and make it into something I could live off. I knew there was potential, especially with small companies needing affordable, customized products. I had the vision mapped out, the suppliers listed, and even some sample designs. That money from Grandpa was the final push. I needed to bring my dream to life. But things didn't go as planned. Around that time, my brother, 31M,

had been out of work for almost two years. He jumped from job to job, but nothing ever stuck. Mostly because my brother cannot for the life of him follow rules. He'd always sleep in or not go to work without informing anyone. Not to mention, he also had dropped out of college and never really got his act together. He'd been floating from one day. bad decision to another, and my parents were constantly supporting him. They would pay his bills, buy him things, and let him stay with them without any responsibility. The guy was 26 at the time and still living off them without a care in the world. It was frustrating to watch him blow every opportunity and rely on my parents to bail him out. According to them, he was just going through a

rough patch and would get back on his feet soon. However, this rough patch seemed to stretch on forever. Like, I can literally tell you that I have been watching this behavior of his ever since he turned 16. When my parents found out about my birthday gift, everything changed. They wouldn't stop pressuring me to loan my brother the entire amount. They said that he was struggling because he was behind on bills, and needed money to avoid getting evicted. Every time I said no, they made me feel like I was the worst person alive.

They'd call me selfish and say that I owed it to him since family helps family. I finally gave in, but it wasn't because I thought it was the right thing to do. It was because the guilt became too heavy to carry. I figured my brother would pay me back soon, and I'd still have time to get my business off the ground. The next day, I woke up thinking maybe I've done a good thing by helping my brother out. But before I even had a chance to feel good about it, my parents dropped another bombshell on me.

They asked me to start paying them $2,000 in rent. Apparently, turning 18 meant I needed to start contributing to the household, even though I was still in school, had no job, and had just given my entire startup fun to my brother. It was like I was being punished for doing what they wanted in the first place. That's when everything hit me. They never cared about me or my dreams. They only saw me as a way to fix my brother's mess. I felt completely used.

Like my needs and goals were never something that they cared about or even a attempted to know. I packed my things and left that week. I told myself I couldn't keep living like that, where I was just a backup plan for everyone else. I went no contact, NC, with my parents and brother from that day forward. The next few years were tough, but I poured everything I had into making my business a reality. I worked odd jobs while continuing to slowly build my company online and attend college at the same time. I designed logos, custom planners, office kits, and all of that, and eventually began partnering with small businesses that wanted my products. Things picked up faster than I expected. In year two, I opened a small store, and by year

five, I had two locations and an amazing online presence. Then, out of the blue, my parents reached out. I hadn't spoken to them in years, so this was a shock. They were being really vague about why they wanted to talk. But after a while, they finally admitted that my brother was in some serious trouble. They were vague about it, but they told me that my brother was in a lot of trouble and that things had spiraled beyond what they could handle. They wouldn't say exactly what kind of trouble he was in, only that it was serious and that he desperately needed help getting out of it. They told me they were willing to pay me back double the amount I had loaned him years ago

if I could step in and fix things. That caught me off guard. The way they said it, it wasn't just about money they wanted me to use my business connections to help him out. I didn't know the full story, but from what I pieced together, it sounded like my brother had racked up gambling debts, failed in another business venture, and may have been involved in something illegal. They were hoping that since my company worked with a variety of businesses, maybe I could pull some strings and find him a job. I couldn't believe it. After everything they did, they had the nerve to come back and ask for more.

They hadn't reached out to congratulate me on my success or even check on how I was doing. Only reason they were contacting me now was because they wanted me to fix my brother's problems again. I was furious, but also just really sad. It was like nothing had changed. They still only cared about my brother, and I was still just a tool they could use when things got bad. I thought about it for a moment, like I really thought about it. Could I help my brother? Honestly, yes. With the connections I had built in my industry, I probably could have found him

some kind of work or opportunity. But the more I thought about it, the angrier I became. They didn't reach out to check again. And not to mention, my brother never once tried to make things right with me or even acknowledged the fact that he essentially stole from me. He also had our parents come up to me instead of asking me for help himself. I knew that if I stepped in now, I'd be setting myself on fire to keep them warm. They hadn't changed. They still saw me as a backup plan for my brother's failures. And I wasn't about to let history repeat itself. I told them no. I'm not going to sacrifice what I've worked so hard for to bail out my brother. He made his choices, and I'm not responsible for cleaning up his mess. They tried to guilt-trip me again, talking about family and how I was in a good

place now, so I could afford to help. But I stood my ground. I've worked too hard to let them drag me back into their drama. I don't owe them anything, especially after the way they treated me. It's been a week since I told them no, and I haven't heard from them since. I'm starting to feel bad about it. I know it's not my responsibility, but part of me feels guilty for not helping. After all, my brother is still my family. And yeah, I know that I've got to be. I know that I've been said that I wouldn't let their guilting tactic work on me, but, I don't know. It's starting to eat away at me and I feel like I'm going crazy. I guess, I just need someone to tell me that I'm doing the right thing. So, Ida for not helping my parents and brother out because of something

they did to me five years ago? Update 1. Hey everyone, I'm back with an update. It's been three weeks since I posted, and I've had some time to think things through. First off, I really appreciate all the responses, even the ones that didn't agree with me. It gave me a lot to consider. I noticed a few questions came up in the comments, so I'll try to address them before getting into the latest developments. Some of you asked if my parents specifically asked me for money when they reached out. No, they didn't ask for money outright. What they wanted was for me to use my business connections to help my brother. Apparently, his problems are a lot deeper than I initially thought. I don't know all the details my parents were vague, but from what I gathered, my brother

is involved in some kind of debt that's too big to fix with just cash. They think that my contacts in the business world can help him out of the mess. Honestly, I know that's just another way of theirs to drag me back into his chaos. Others asked if I felt guilty about cutting contact with him years ago, or if I ever missed my brother. I mean, I'd be lying if I said it wasn't hard at first. I felt guilty for a long time, wondering if I was a bad person for walking away from my family. But with time, I realized that staying in contact only enabled their behavior. And as for missing my brother, no, not really. The relationship was always one-sided, with me giving and him taking.

And lastly, a lot of you asked why I even gave my brother the money. To be honest, I know that was a very dumb decision. But you have to understand that I was only eight. I was still in high school and living with my parents. They never gave up on pressuring me to give my brother the money. I still have no idea how they found out about the money in the first place, but from the moment I woke up in the morning to when I went to sleep at night, that was all my parents talked about. They used every tactic they knew to make me feel guilty about not helping him. I kept some of the amount Grandpa gave me, but most of it I gave my brother because of how guilty my parents made me feel. Now, on to what happened recently. After my parents reached out asking for help, they went radio silent for about a week. I figured they gave up on me and found someone else to bail my brother out. But then, out of nowhere, they invited me to dinner to talk things through. I debated whether or not to go. Part of me thought it might bring closure if I faced them in person, but I also knew it would

probably just be another guilt trip. In the end, I decided to go not because I wanted to help, but because I wanted to see if anything had really changed. Spoiler alert, it hasn't. The dinner was at a local restaurant, which I found odd since my parents usually insisted on hosting things at home. I arrived, and they were already seated, and they were looking weirdly happy to see me. The whole vibe felt forced, like as if they were trying too hard to act normal. At first, things were civil. We exchanged some polite small talk, and I almost started to think maybe they were actually trying to reconnect without any ulterior motives. But that hope didn't last long. About halfway through dinner, the real reason I was invited came up. They weren't asking for money,

but they still wanted me to use my success to help my brother. They said that since my business has connections with investors and some people in the financial world, I could make a few introductions that might help straighten things out for him. It wasn't a direct ask for cash, but it was still a favor I didn't want to get involved in. I could feel that old, familiar feeling creeping back. The same feeling I had when they pressured me to give my brother the lone years ago. And just when I thought the conversation couldn't get worse, my brother showed up. He wasn't even supposed to be there, at least, they never mentioned that he'd be joining us. He just walked in, looking smug and acting like he owned the place. From the moment he sat down,

it was clear he hadn't changed one bit. He was loud, arrogant, and completely unapologetic about the mess he'd gotten himself into. It was as if he expected me to roll out the red carpet and fix everything for him. He also, for some reason, acted like I owed him. He actually had the audacity to suggest that since I was so lucky with my business, it was only fair that I help him out. Like I should feel grateful for the opportunity he's given me to do good. He even made snide comments about how my business wouldn't have taken off if I hadn't loaned him the money back then. He genuinely thought that his failure somehow contributed to my success. Can you believe that?

It took everything in me not to walk out right then and there. But that dinner was the final nail in the coffin for me. I realized that nothing had changed. My parents are still enabling my brother, and he's still the same entitled, selfish person he's always been. They're not looking for help because they care about me or respect how far I've gotten. They just see me as a solution to a problem they don't want to deal with themselves. After that dinner, I went straight home and blocked their numbers. I thought I'd

feel guilty, but honestly, I just feel relieved. For the first time in a long time, I know I made the right decision. That's where things stand right now. I've cut them off for good this time, and I feel at peace with my decision. I know some people might think I'm being harsh, but I've learned the hard way that setting boundaries is necessary especially with family. I'm finally putting myself first, and it feels good. I'll post another update if anything changes, but for now, I'm moving on with my life. Thanks again to everyone who gave advice it really helped me see things clearly. Update 2, it's been about six months since my last update, and things have gotten even more

complicated. I thought I had closed the door on this situation, but apparently my family isn't ready to let go. Since blocking my parents, I started getting messages from extended family some aunts, uncles, and cousins telling me I was cold and heartless for abandoning my brother when he needed me the most. A few even said that I've forgotten where I came from now that I've found success. It's frustrating, especially since none of these people offered to step up and help him themselves. At first, I ignored their messages and hoped they'd drop it. But the guilt started creeping in again, and I found myself wondering if I was being too harsh. I kept thinking, what if his situation is worse than I realized? So, I unblocked my parents to try and get some

clarity. As soon as I reached out, I found out just how deep my brother's mess really was. It turns out he owes over $90,000 in debt mostly from gambling and some shape. personal loans. When I heard the amount, I was floored. This wasn't just a small mistake or a string of bad luck. This was a disaster he had knowingly created. And the worst part? That money I gave him on my 18th birthday the one my parents guilt me into giving him was never used for rent. Instead, he blew it on gambling and a failed attempt to start some half-baked business. Learning that just made me angrier. All this time, I believed that the loan was at least helping him stay afloat, but no. He gambled it away, and now he's buried himself even deeper. My parents tried to downplay it,

of course. They kept saying, everyone makes mistakes, and family should stick together. But I wasn't having it. I reminded them that they could just give him the money they promised to give me double the original loan, remember? That would help him pay down some of his debt. That's when even more truth came out. They admitted they never had the money to begin with. It was just a ploy to get me to step in, either with my own cash or my business connections. What they really wanted was for me to find him a high-paying job in my network so he could slowly work off his debt. I was furious.

Not only had they lied to me, but they were also trying to shift the responsibility of fixing his mess onto me once again. Of course, I refused to help and they didn't take it well. They said I was being selfish and that I needed to remember the importance of family. After I shut them down, they started contacting other relatives and twisted the story to make it seem like I was turning my back on them. I got bombarded with messages from cousins saying things like, You're successful now, it wouldn't hurt you to help out, and he's your brother. Aren't you ashamed to abandon him like this? It was exhausting. At that point, I realized I had to set some serious boundaries.

not just with my parents but with the rest of the family too. I responded to the relatives who reached out and told them that if they were so concerned about my brother, they could step up and help him out. None of them had anything to say after that. They just quietly stopped messaging me, which only proved to me that they weren't really interested in helping. They just wanted to guilt me into doing it. The more I thought about it, the angrier I became. I kept replaying everything in my head from how they forced me to give up the money,

on my 18th birthday to how they demanded rent for me the very next day. It hit me that the only reason they wanted me to pay rent was to probably give my brother even more money. They were just using me as another source of cash for my brother's lifestyle. I wish things could have been different with my parents and brother, but I've accepted that some relationships just can't be fixed. If they ever truly want to reconnect with me, it'll have to come from a place of respect and not manipulation.

But for now, I'm done. I'm not going to let guilt or family pressure pull me back into a toxic situation. Thanks again to everyone who commented and shared advice. Your support has really helped me stay strong throughout this mess. I'll post another update if anything major happens, but for now, I'm moving forward and not looking back. Update 3. It's been a good while since my last update, and things have somehow gone from bad to worse. I thought I had reached the end of this mess after blocking my parents and brother again.

but it turns out they weren't done dragging me into their chaos. This time, they've decided to escalate things in the most ridiculous way imaginable. They're now threatening to take legal action against me. Yep, you read that right my parents are now threatening to sue me for ruining the family. To give you some context, I recently found out that my brother's financial situation has become even more of a disaster. Honestly, I didn't even think that was possible considering how much my parents have been begging me to help him out. Apparently, he's deep in debt with loan sharks now. It's worse than

just credit card debt or a few overdue bills. From what I've pieced together through some mutual contacts, these aren't the kind of people who just send friendly reminders for payment. He owes them tens of thousands of dollars, and they're pressuring him hard. My parents, of course, are panicking, but instead of holding my brother accountable, they've decided that this is somehow my fault. My got another number and they began texting me through that. They've sent me multiple messages, all of which were ridiculous, but they essentially kept saying the same things about me turning my back on my family. I didn't respond to them so they've now resorted to sending me legal threats. Their texts say that they're considering suing me for emotional damages because I've broken

the family bond and caused them immense stress. At first, I thought they were just bluffing. It sounded so absurd. Like, what judge is going to look at this situation and say, yes, your adult daughter who refused to cover your gambling son's debt is clearly responsible. But as the messages kept coming, they started making me feel uneasy. What if they really tried to drag me to court just to make my life harder? I decided it was time to consult with a lawyer because I just wanted to cover my bases. Thankfully, the lawyer reassured me that I had absolutely nothing to worry about. They explained that my parents and brother have no legal basis to sue me. I'm not financially responsible for my brother's poor choices,

and emotional damages in cases like this are rarely taken seriously, especially since I've had no direct involvement with his debt. The lawyer also told me it was smart to block them earlier. They also suggested that I block them again and block all other numbers or accounts that they try to contact me through so there would be no way for them to harass me anymore. They also told me to keep a record of everything my parents and my brother said over text or call so that I could treat it as evidence of harassment. Knowing that I was legally in the clear was a huge relief.

Still, the entire situation made me feel sick. It's hard to describe how exhausting this has been. It's like no matter how many boundaries I set, my parents keep finding new ways to try and drag me back into their mess. And the entitlement is just mind-blowing. They actually think it's reasonable to blame me someone they've mistreated for years for the fact that my brother gambled his life away. It's like they can't even comprehend the idea that he is responsible for his own actions. What hurts the most is that instead of trying to make things right, my parents have doubled down on manipulation and threats.

They could have taken responsibility or even asked my brother to figure things out on his own, but no. In their eyes, it's easier to blame me than face reality. I feel angry, frustrated, and honestly just drained. I keep asking myself how things got to this point. But deep down, I know that no amount of self-reflection will change who they are. This is who they've always been, people who expect me to fix everything without giving anything in return. And that's a reality I just have to accept.

I don't know if there will be another update honestly, I hope this is the end of it. But if anything major happens, I'll be sure to let you all know. For now, I'm closing this chapter and moving forward. Update 4. It's been about a month since my last update, and things have taken another turn, as expected. Just when I thought I'd heard the worst of it, I got some news from a mutual friend that my brother has now landed himself in legal trouble. This time, it's serious. He's being investigated for fraud.

Apparently, in addition to all the debt he racked up with lone sharks and his failed gambling ventures, He got involved in something shady to try to dig himself out of the hole. From what I've heard, it's linked to some sort of fraudulent scheme he participated in because he probably thought it was a quick way to make money. Now, the police are involved, and he's being investigated for fraud. If he's convicted, there's a real chance he could be facing jail time. It's crazy how things have spiraled this far. I always knew he was irresponsible, but I never imagined it would escalate to the point

where he's committing crimes. Unfortunately, it gets worse and this time it's for my parents. They are now facing eviction because of him. From what I've been told, they took out loans and refinanced their home multiple times over the years to help him, which is probably so they could help cover his debts and bail him out of trouble. Now, they're so deep in debt themselves that they're about to lose the house. Even though I had blocked them on all platforms, they managed to get a message to me through a relative.

It was more of the same, a last-ditch effort to get me to step in and help. They didn't ask for money directly this time as well. Instead, they wanted me to use my resources and connections to find them a place to stay or help them fight the eviction. I hate that it's come to this for them. No matter what they've done to me, they're still my parents, and I don't wish homelessness on anyone. That being said, I can't get involved.

I warned them over and over again that they were enabling. my brother's behavior, but they refused to listen. They chose to sacrifice everything for him, even when they could have taken a step back and made him deal with his own mess. Now, they're dealing with the consequences of that decision, and as harsh as it sounds, it's not my responsibility to fix it. The fact that they're still trying to pull me into this, even after all the boundaries I've set, just proves that nothing has changed. They haven't learned, and they likely never will. My brother has always been their priority, and they continue to expect me to clean up after him, no matter how far he's fallen. I still feel some sadness for them, of course. It's hard to

completely turn off those emotions. I mean who wouldn't feel sad to hear their parents are about to lose their home. But at the same time, I know that helping them now would only drag me back into the same toxic cycle. They'd continue to rely on me to solve all their problems, while never holding my brother accountable for anything. That's not a burden I'm willing to carry, no matter how much they try to guilt me. The hardest part of this whole situation has been sticking to my decision to stay out of it. There's always that small voice in the back of my mind that wonders if I'm being too cold or too harsh. But then I remind myself that I've done everything I could for them in the past, and none of it ever made a difference. They've made their choices,

and I've made mine. At this point, I've also cut off contact with the relative who passed along the message. I know they meant well, but I don't need anyone trying to play the middleman and guilt me into caving. I've set my boundaries, and I'm sticking to them. For anyone wondering, I've done a bit of digging, and it turns out the fraud investigation against my brother is quite serious. The police have been building a case for months now, and it doesn't look good for him. whether or not he'll face jail time will only become clear later, but I wouldn't be surprised

if that's where this all leads. It's hard to feel sorry for him at this point, especially because he's had countless chances to turn things around, and he wasted all of them. I'm just going to continue to focus on protecting my mental health and my boundaries. This whole experience has been exhausting, and I think I'm long overdue for a break. Thanks again to everyone who's been supportive throughout this entire ordeal. This will likely be my final update, as I've decided to fully cut ties with everyone involved. I'm moving forward, and I'm at peace with my decision.

I hope you enjoy this story. Brought up and embraced my stepchild, but she mentioned that I was too blue-collar to escort her during her wedding ceremony, thus I declined to participate in her marriage celebration altogether, yet she called begging me to come to her wedding when her rich bio dad ruined everything. I, 52M, have been married to my wife Lena, 48F, for 20 years. When I met Lena, she was coming out of an emotionally abusive marriage with her ex-husband Danny. She had a five-year-old daughter Emma from that marriage.

Danny was a pretty awful husband and father, he constantly belittled Lena and basically ignored Emma. He left when Emma was a toddler, and Lena divorced him. By the time I came into the picture, Danny had been out of her. of their lives for a couple of years. From the beginning, I treated Emma as my own. I never pushed her to call me Dad, but I was there for her in every way. I read bedtime stories, packed school lunches, helped with homework, went to all her school plays and soccer games, everything. Eventually, Emma started calling me Dad on her own. It meant the world to me. I never had biological children, and I loved Emma as if she were my daughter by blood. I officially adopted her when

she was 10, with Danny completely M-I-A and giving up his parental rights without a fight. Things were great as a family until Emma hit her mid-teens. When Emma was 16, Danny suddenly reappeared in her life. We were shocked. He contacted Lena out of the blue, saying he wanted to reconnect with his little girl. Apparently, Danny had come into a lot of money and was now wealthy. At first, Lena was very wary and protective, but Emma was curious to meet her biological father. I understood that curiosity, so I didn't want to stand in a way. We allowed a meeting. To our surprise, Danny seemed to have changed on the surface. He was charming, polite, and loaded with cash. The man who never paid a dime of child support suddenly could

buy Emma expensive things, design her clothes, take her to fancy restaurant. etc. I couldn't compete with that kind of fleshy spending. I'm a blue-collar guy, I work as an electrician and make a modest but honest living. We're comfortable but not wealthy. Over the next few years, I watched Emma get pulled in by Danny's luxury lifestyle. At first, it was small things. Emma would come home gushing about the dinner Danny treated her to, or the new iPhone he bought her. Then it escalated, he got her a car, for her 17th birthday, took her on a trip to Europe when she graduated high school, etc. Whenever Danny was in the picture, it was like I became invisible to Emma.

She started blowing off plans with me and Lena to spend time with real dad if he was in town. Lena tried to talk to her about how money isn't everything and remind her how Danny treated us in the past, but Emma would get defensive and say Danny had changed and that we were just jealous of his success. It was heartbreaking. From 16 onwards, it felt like I was watching the daughter I raised Drift Away. By the time Emma was in college, Danny generously paid her tuition, of course, she was spending holidays with Danny instead of us half the time. She still lived at home with us during school breaks, but even then she was often at Danny's

penthouse or off on some lavish outing with him. My relationship with her became strained. We never had a big blowout fight or anything, but there was this tension. I felt like an afterthought in her life. She would still call me dad occasionally, but other times she'd pointedly refer to Danny as my dad in conversation. It hurt a lot, but I tried to play it cool. I figured maybe as she matured she'd see through Danny's superficial love bombing and appreciate

what we had. I'm much forward to this year. Emma is 25 now and got engaged to her fiancé Ryan. Ryan's family is pretty well off from what I understand, not crazy. rich like Danny, but doing good. We were happy for her and excited to help with the wedding. Since I'm technically Emma's adoptive father and the one who raised her, I always assumed I'd be the one walking her down the aisle. Over the years, we'd even casually talked about it and she'd said, of course, I would. Well, about two weeks before the wedding day, Emma drops a

bomb on me and her mom. She tells me she doesn't want me walking her down the aisle. Her excuse was that She's a modern woman and thinks the tradition of giving away the bride is outdated. This was a lie. I didn't want to force her if she felt strongly about it. So I told her, OK, if you're sure about that, it's your day. She seemed relieved that I didn't make a stink. However, something felt off about her explanation. My gut said she wasn't being honest about the reason.

Lena also suspected something was up. A few days later, I found out the real reason. Emma had asked Danny, her biological father, to walk her down the aisle instead. And she hadn't planned on telling me at all. I learned this accidentally when talking with the wedding planner at a family meeting. The planner made a comment like, so Danny and Emma will enter from here. And I was like, wait, Danny? You mean her father, Danny?

It turned into an awkward silence. Later, I confronted Emma privately and asked if it was true that she was having Danny give her away. She got defensive at first, then finally admitted it. Her voice and attitude were so cold, it stunned me. She said something along the lines of, well, Danny is my actual father, and you're, you're not. Plus, let's be real, you're two working class and would look out of place at a high-end wedding. I don't want to be embarrassed in front of my new in-laws. When I regained my words, I told her that was one of the cruelest things she's ever said to me.

Emma just shrugged like it was no big deal and said I was overreacting. That's when I told her, if you think I embarrass you that much, I won't come to the wedding at all. You can have him do the father-daughter stuff, and I'll just stay home. Emma was fine with that. She said I could do whatever I wanted. Lena was furious and told Emma she was being incredibly hurtful, but Emma was adamant that it was her day and we needed to respect her choices. So two weeks later, the wedding day comes. I stuck to my word and did not attend.

Lena was torn, she didn't want to miss her only daughter's wedding, but she was also disgusted with how Emma treated me. In the end, Lena also chose not to go. She told Emma that if the man who raised her wasn't welcome, Then as her mother she wasn't going to sit there and pretend everything was okay. We heard later from relatives that Emma was extremely upset when she realized her mom wasn't coming either, but she made her choice. Apparently, the wedding turned into a disaster. Since neither I nor Lena were there, Danny was basically the only parent present from Emma's side.

And Danny, being Danny, managed to screw it up. He showed up to the ceremony already buzzed, I suspect he'd been drinking beforehand. By the reception, he was full-on drunk. He made a scene during his toast, slurring and making inappropriate jokes. At one point he got into a heated argument with Ryan's father, possibly over some rude comment Danny made about paying for the wedding. It got so bad that Ryan's parents and some of their relatives left early in anger. I wasn't at the wedding, but I started getting frantic calls that evening. first from one of the bridesma's, then from Emma herself.

Emma was crying on the phone, begging me to come to the reception right now because Danny is ruining everything. She said I needed to come take care of the situation, like I somehow could magically fix what her bio dad did. She also had the nerve to accuse me of abandoning her on her wedding day, insinuating that none of this would have happened if I had been there. I was furious at that accusation. I told Emma, very bluntly, that this mess was a direct result of her choices. I said, you didn't want me there because I'm embarrassing and not good enough for your fancy-in-laws. So deal with the consequences of having your real dad there instead.

And then I hung up. I ended up turning my phone off that night because I just didn't want to hear it. Lena and I sat at home, both angry and heartbroken. The next day, we found out from relatives how the wedding wrapped up. Emma did get married to Ryan, but a lot of people left right after the ceremony because of the drama. Ryan is understandably upset at Emma for insisting Danny be there despite his track record. Apparently Ryan even said to her that if I had been there, none of this would have happened, which ironically is exactly what Emma was saying, but in the sense that I would have kept Danny under control or something.

So now there's tension between the newlyweds because Ryan's family is angry and Ryan himself is blaming Emma for the whole situation. Now here we are a week later. Emma has tried to call a few times, but honestly I'm not ready to speak with her. I sent her a message saying I need time and that I meant what I said about her reaping what she sowed. Some of my family, like my brother, who did attend the wedding, think I should have just gone to support her, arguing that you're her dad, you should have been there no matter what. They believe I could have prevented the train wreck if I was present. I personally think I had every right to sit out after the way she disrespected me. So Reddit, Ida for refusing to attend my stepdaughter's wedding?

Comment 1. NTA and frankly your daughter sounds like an ungrateful, entitled Brat. She had the audacity to tell you to stay away because your two working class for her fancy wedding and then expected you to come running to pick up the pieces when her bio dad, who abandoned her for years, inevitably screwed up. That's some nerve. You raised this girl, you loved her, and she treated you like garbage. You owed her nothing after the way she disrespected you. Honestly, good on you for standing having a backbone. She made her bed, it's about time she faced the consequences.

I'll reply, I won't lie, I'm really hurt and angry about what she did. Hearing her say those things broke something in me. I appreciate your support. It's a tough situation because of my. despite it all, she's still my daughter and a part of me cares about her. But I agree, I wasn't about to go fix a mess that I had been deliberately cut out of. She's learning the hard way that actions have consequences. Comment two, definitely NTA. You were basically her dad for 20 years, and she completely disrespected and discarded you for a deadbeat who threw money at her.

I'm so sorry. You didn't deserve that. Quick question, did she ever apologize or try to reach out after the wedding disaster, aside from that crying phone call the day of? Or is she still acting like you're the bad guy? Op reply, no, she hasn't apologized at all so far. The only time I've heard from her was that phone call during the reception where she was upset and kind of tried to blame me for not being there. After that, she went radio silent towards me, and I towards her. No apology, no acknowledgement of what she did.

I think she's still too wrapped up in her own feelings to see our side of it. Comment three, I'm leaning toward Entier, but I have to ask, do you regret not attending at all? Like, I 100% get why you were angry and hurt. What Emma said to you was horrible, but some might argue that as the parent, you could have taken the high road and at least gone to the ceremony for her mother's sake or to prevent exactly this kind of outcome. Do you feel you did the right thing by boycotting or any second thoughts? I'll reply, honestly, I was too hurt to just put on a smile and act like everything was fine.

And she did tell me not to come, I was respecting her wishes, even if those wishes came from a cruel place. Could my presence have kept things calmer? Maybe, maybe not. We'll never know. I do feel I did the right thing standing my ground, because otherwise I'd be saying it was okay for her to treat me like that. It's a sad situation all around, but I don't really regret refusing to go, given what she said and how she acted. Update 1, it's been about three months since the wedding. I haven't spoken to Emma at all in that time.

I was, and still am very hurt, and she didn't exactly make any effort to apologize after the wedding incident. Lena and I basically went low contact with Emma, we decided to give her space and also protect ourselves from more heartbreak. A few days ago, I got an unexpected phone call from Emma's husband, Ryan. I was surprised because I've never really talked one-on-one with Ryan outside a polite small talk. He said he wanted to update me on what's been going on with Emma. According to Ryan, Emma has been struggling with depression since the wedding. Apparently, Ryan's parents, my daughter's in-laws, are refusing to speak to Emma at all. They blame her for the wedding fiasco and are upset that she brought Danny, her bio dad, into their family events.

From what Ryan said, his parents think Emma embarrassed their family and they haven't forgiven her. Ouch. Ryan himself sounded pretty upset too. He said the whole situation put a lot of strain on their new marriage right from the start. He admitted that he was angry at Emma for a while because she insisted on involving Danny despite knowing his history. He told me he actually had a bad feeling about Danny but went along with it to make Emma happy. Now he regrets not putting his foot down. He's trying to be supportive of Emma because she's his wife, but he also sounded frustrated.

I could tell he was torn between defending her and feeling like she brought this on herself. The thing is, according to Ryan, Emma still doesn't really get it. He told me that when they talk about the wedding disaster, Emma keeps saying that if I had been there, none of it would have happened. He's basically shifting the blame, claiming I abandoned her and that as her real father figure I should have been at her wedding no matter what. I asked Ryan straight up, why are you telling me all this? Is Emma asking for me? He paused and then admitted that Emma has been hinting that she wants to reach out but is afraid I hate her now. Ryan said he personally thinks Emma owes me a big apology, which was nice to hear him say, but he also asked if I would consider talking to her

eventually because she's not in a good place. I told him I appreciate the update and I'm sorry they're going through this, but I'm not ready to talk to Emma yet if she's still unable to own up to what she did. Ryan understood. He sounded kind of defeated, to be honest. I genuinely feel bad for the guy, this is not how you want to start married life. So that's where things stand. Emma is basically facing the fallout of her choices. Her in-laws want nothing to do with her, her husband is struggling to forgive her, and the bio-dad she glorified disappeared after causing the damage. And yet, she still hasn't actually apologized to me or her mom.

It's sad and frustrating. I'm still holding my ground for now. I won't lie, part of me aches to just hug my daughter and make her feel better, but I know that we can't even begin to fix this until she truly understands. understands how deeply she hurt us. Comment one, do you think you would forgive her if she came to you now with a genuine apology? I'll reply, I've thought about that a lot.

If she truly understood what she did wrong and gave a heartfelt apology, I would be open to talking. I do love her, that doesn't just disappear, even after everything. But it would take time to rebuild trust. I'm not going to just sweep it under the rug instantly. So yes, there is a path to reconcile. but it has to start with her acknowledging how badly she hurt us. Without that, any forgiveness would feel hollow.

I'm cautiously we might get there someday, but I'm not going to pretend nothing happened either. Update 2, another six months have passed, around nine months since the wedding. Until yesterday, we still had zero contact with Emma. No calls, no visits, nothing since that disastrous phone conversation on her wedding night. Lena and I have tried to move forward with life. Honestly, it's been a quiet of somber time for us. We miss our daughter, but we're also still very much hurt and disappointed. Well, out of the blue, Emma showed up at our house yesterday evening.

It was completely unannounced. I opened the door and there she was, standing on the porch. To say I was shocked would be an understatement. I hadn't seen her in person since before the wedding. She looked, not great. You could tell she'd been through the ringer emotionally. She was visibly nervous and had tears in her eyes as soon as I answered the door. Lina was right behind me. Emma's first words were, Dad, I'm pregnant. Just like that. I think she expected this news to be a magic ticket to instant reconciliation. Lena gasped and I was just like, okay. I

congratulated her softly, but I didn't rush to hug her or invite her in with open arms. I was still frozen, processing that my little girl, who hadn't spoken to me in months, was now going to have a baby. Seeing that I wasn't immediately embracing her, Emma's mood flipped. She went from anxious to angry very quickly. She started raising her voice, saying things like, I can't believe you're really going to keep this up when I'm trying to tell you something important. Lena told her to calm down and that we were in shock. We invited her in to sit and talk, but Emma was already worked up. She launched into a rant essentially blaming me for everything.

She yelled that I abandoned her just like Danny always did and that I was proving I didn't really love her unconditionally. She said I'd rather hold on to my pride than be there for her and my future grandchild. That accusation really set me off. I've been extremely patient and quiet about my feelings for years, but at that moment I finally let loose. I didn't yell back, but I spoke very firmly. I told Emma that she had no right to come into our home and start making demands or accusing me of not loving her. I reminded her, of everything I did for her growing up, all the rides to school, the bedtime stories, the times I rushed to the ER when she was sick or hurt, the years of supporting her emotionally and financially.

I told her how deeply her words and actions surrounding the wedding hurt me and her mother. I said, you shut us out, you lied to me, you insulted me and made me feel like garbage. And now you show up out of nowhere and expect everything to be okay because you're pregnant. That's not how this works. Nina was crying at this point, and Emma just sat there silently, I think she was shocked because I had never spoken to her that sternly in her life. After a moment, Emma muttered something like, I knew it. You really don't care, and got up and stormed out of the house. We tried to get her to stay and talk it through, but she was already in her car by the time we got to the door.

Later that night, we started getting calls slash texts from a few relatives, my sister and an aunt who heard from Emma. Emma apparently told them that she came to us with happy news about the baby and that I rejected her and my grandchild outright. Basically, she painted me as some cold-hearted ogre who told her to get lost, which is a huge exaggeration of what actually happened. Thankfully, I was able to explain the real story to my sister, and she's on our side. But it just sucks that even now Emma is twisting the truth to make me look like the bad guy to others. At this point, I'm emotionally exhausted. It feels like no matter what I do, I'm either the villain or the doormat. I refuse to be the doormat anymore.

I stand by how I handled things yesterday. I didn't scream or call her names, I just finally spoke my truth. If she can't handle hearing the reality of how she treated us, that's on her. I'm not slamming the door forever, I do want to have a relationship with my future grandkid, but I'm done chasing after Emma and begging her to see my side. The next move has to come from her, and it has to be real this time. Update 3, it's now been a year since my last update, roughly a year and a half since the wedding. That has happened, and I wanted to share the final update to this saga.

Lena and I actually took a long trip abroad for a few months, partly to clear our heads from all the family drama. We just got home last week. While we were away, Emma gave birth to her baby girl. We weren't there for the birth, nor were we expecting to be, given the state of things. After our return, Emma reached out to us. For the first time, her tone was different. She asked if we could meet to talk. We agreed, and two days ago we sat down with her, and baby, at our house.

It was emotional, to say the least. Emma actually broke down crying the moment she saw us. Through tears, she apologized. Not a half-hearted sorry you felt that way kind of thing. but an actual apology for how she treated me and Lena. She said there's no excuse for the way she behaved. Turns out, Emma has been in therapy for the past several months, which Ryan gently insisted on especially after the baby was born.

In therapy, she's been unpacking a lot of issues, particularly her relationship with Danny. She told us that she finally started to see how her fear of abandonment by Danny made her desperate for his approval, to the point that she was willing to overlook all his failings and hurt the people who actually stood by her, me and her mom. She admitted that she'd essentially put Danny on a pedestal once he came back into her life, and she's realized how badly she betrayed our trust and love in the process. Emma also updated us on her current situation. It's not good. As expected, Danny disappeared again shortly after the baby was born.

He made a token visit to the hospital, dropped on a. off an expensive gift for the baby, took a couple photos for social media, and then ghosted. He's now nowhere to be found, big surprise. On top of that, Ryan's parents are still frosty. Apparently they offered Ryan financial help if he divorced Emma, pretty brutal, but they're that angry over the wedding embarrassment now having a grandchild tied to drama. Ryan hasn't divorced her, he actually seems to be sticking by Emma, but their marriage has been under a lot of stress due to all this. Facing all this, plus becoming a mother, seems to have really humbled Emma. She said becoming a mom made her reflect on how she treated her own parents. She told us,

I kept comparing you to Danny, but now I see who actually acted like a father and who didn't. It was hard for her to say all that, I could tell, but I'm glad she finally gets it, or at least is starting to. We talked for a long time. There were a lot of tears, and a lot of honesty. I didn't sugarcoat how much pain she caused, but I also told her that we love her and that my door was never fully closed. I was just waiting for her to be ready to rebuild trust.

She asked if we would be willing to be in her and the baby's life, and we told her yes, with boundaries. We made it clear that we're not going to jump straight into playing happy family. Trust needs to be rebuilt gradually. She understood and agreed that was fair. Yesterday, I met my granddaughter for the first time. She's absolutely beautiful. I held her, and I won't lie, I had a few tears.

It really hit me that I almost missed out on this child's life because of all the turmoil. I'm a bit optimistic now. Emma has a lot of work to do on herself, but she's making an effort. Ryan also called me separately and apologized for his part. He felt he should have backed me up about the way. wedding and not let things get so far. Water under the bridge at this point. So, we're taking it slow. We plan to have Emma and the baby over for dinner once a week and just reconnect in small steps. I'm still a bit guarded, I think that's natural, but I'm hopeful that we can rebuild

our relationship over time. And I'm grateful I get to know my granddaughter. It's been a hell of a ride, but I feel like we're finally in a better place. Thank you to everyone who followed along and offered support. It helped me stay strong and also gave me perspective when I was really low. Here's to hoping things only improve from here on out. I hope you enjoy this story. Employed at the family company for a dozen years, however, my father transferred ownership to my distant sister and her wealthy partner instead of me. Later on, he sought assistance from me. They abandoned him after his heart at C.K. I, 36F, got kicked out of the business that my father had established, just eight months ago. For context, I have been a part of the family

business for almost 12 years now. We have a jewelry business that was started by my grandfather on my father's side. Then it went on to my father, and after that, I expected that it would come to me. After all, I am the older sister and I have always taken a keen interest in the business ever since I was in my teenage years. And my dad always kept telling me that eventually, he would expect me to take over the business anyway. Because my sister, 33F, did not seem interested in having a career, she just wanted to get married and have a family. So if he was going to have an heir for the business, it was going to be me and it has always been taken for granted. There is no formal documentation of it, but I guess I should have arranged for something like that because I had served as my dad's personal assistant for 12 years. I even quit my first job just after two years of working there, since I did not want to come off as entitled and wanted to get some genuine work experience on my own before working with my father, but I left because my dad wanted me to start working with him.

and in spite of everything that I had done, I still got kicked out of the business in favor of my sister and my sister's ridiculously rich fiancé. She had not even been part of the family for the past 15 years, since she had made a couple of really bad decisions and my parents had decided to cut her out of the family. Right after she turned 18, she announced that she would not be going to college and she wanted to explore and find herself. That did not go down with my parents, and they told her that she would either go to college or she could leave. They had given her an ultimatum, and she, being the kind of person that she is, decided to leave and move in with her boyfriend at the time. They did not last for long and they broke up within six months then, she showed up at our doorstep once again, requesting to be let back into the family.

Before she had left, she had said a lot of awful things to my parents, like how she did not need them anymore and how she was better off without a family. like this. That they were not even good enough for her because her boyfriend and his family were doing much better financially, compared to us. So she had really put us down and completely insulted and humiliated us before she had left, and when she came back, my dad told her that the conditions that he had put forward to her the last time still stood. So now, she had to agree to go to college and get a degree, no matter what she chose, or she could just stay out. My sister tried to argue, and fight her way back into the family, but my dad was pretty adamant. So once again, she was supposed to leave and this time, she said that she was never going to come back again.

For the next 15 years, we would only see her at family events, but never otherwise. And whenever she had a life update, we would find out about it from other relatives because she refused to speak to us. My mom and I tried to contact her several times, but because we were still on good terms with my father, she refused to speak to us as well. I have to say, she was really proud, and she stuck to her words, she did not come back until my dad tried to reestablish contact with her himself. She kind of figured her life out on her own, although, not exactly in the way that would have expected her. Like she had promised us, she did not go to college because she just wasn't interested. However, for a few months, she lived with her friend and then,

She got a job and started working for herself to fund the life she wanted. I think it was pretty good for her because, along the way, I guess she matured a lot. She switched between jobs pretty frequently, but for the past couple of years, she had been working at an advertising agency. My family knows all of this about her because she did keep in touch with the rest of our family and our relatives would keep us updated, and she knew about it. About a year ago, my dad felt dangerously ill, and we almost thought that we had lost him because he was having a lot of problems with his heart, and the cardiologist told us that it was not looking too good for him until he implemented some serious lifestyle changes. And, during that time, when he thought that it was over, my dad decided to finally contact my sister and end the bad blood between the two of them.

and because my sister had grown up considerably over the course of the past 15 years, she finally decided to come back and become a part of the family again. The day that she visited us, she came alone and we did not talk much about her life because we were just too busy reminiscing about the past and she did not want to make it all about herself, so she did not tell us much about everything else that she had been up to, the information that we did not get from our relatives. We knew how she was doing professionally, we just didn't know it. anything about her personal life.

Anyway, she just seemed happy to be back and all of us were focused on the reconciliation between father and daughter. It was a very emotional reunion, and I was happy about all of it back then, not knowing what was about to happen later. When she visited us for the second time, she brought along her fiancé, which came as a huge shock to all of us. She told us that she had been dating her fiancé for the past three years and only recently did they get engaged. Nobody else in the family knew about it, which is why we hadn't been able

to find out about it either, because they had been keeping it under wraps. The flow of information was not just from her end to us, but she had also known, thanks to our relatives, that our father was having some complications with his health. But she did not know exactly how serious it was, which is why she had not bothered to visit us. And she had thought that it was not exactly appropriate to announce the engagement at the time, so she had kept it private. But now, she believed that it was about time to introduce him to the family and so, she had brought him along. He seemed like a nice guy and I could tell he was pretty well financially off since his clothes, his watch, and shoes were all expensive. I was happy for my sister because I felt like she was

finally with the kind of guy that she wanted to be with, somebody who was financially stable, knew what he wanted to do in life, and had his future sorted out for him. After talking to both of them, we got to know that her fiancé, just like her first boyfriend, was also the son of a pretty wealthy man who ran his own chain of fast food restaurants. But unlike her first boyfriend, this guy actually seemed to be serious about her, and we could tell that the two of them were really in love. I was genuinely happy for her and I remember congratulating the two of them. I never thought that my father or even my sister and her fiancé would do what they did.

But after about three weeks of knowing them, my father suddenly decided that it would be for the best if we let them take over our business as well. One fine morning, he just called me up and told me that he wanted me to come home because he wanted to talk to me about something. I was at work at the time, since I was the one who had been taking care of everything ever since my dad's heart health had declined and I was basically the boss at the time. he just hadn't officially retired yet, but I knew that it was going to happen at some point. At that point, I was confident that I would be in line to step up and be the CEO of our business. But that one day changed everything and all of a sudden, my sister and her fiancé were the ones who were in the running to take over the business that I had been taking care of forever. When I went to my parents' house that day, my sister and her fiancé were not there, but my parents were and they looked pretty grim. After some small talk, my dad finally delivered the crushing blow and I really thought that he was joking about it.

But when I realized that he was serious, I just couldn't believe it. When I asked him why he would take such a decision after just three weeks of knowing this guy, he told me that he had his reasons and he refused to tell me, but after a considerable amount of arguing, he finally told me that the reason he was handing over the business to my sister and her fiancé instead of me, as promised. was because he believed that they would be more capable than I am. The cherry on top was that he believed that this could be a gift of welcome to the two of them, back into the family. Since they were going to start a new chapter in their life by getting married in a couple of months,

they believed that this could be their wedding gift. I tried to convince him that this was a horrible idea because a wedding gift need not be as big as an entire business just because the guy seemed wealthy, and on top of that, he had always led me. to believe that I would be the one inheriting it when he eventually retired. I had built my whole life around this fact, and, all of a sudden, he was snatching it away for me to give to people who had nothing to do with us for the past 15 years. I tried to tell him that maybe he could make us partners in the business, an attempt to bargain and negotiate with him because this was my future that we were talking about, but my father

was quite firm about what he believed. And he said that he was going to let them take over because he believes that it would be in better hands since my sister's fiancé's father had already built something of his own, and he knew that they would be able to expand our jewelry business twice as fast as me. I begged him for one chance, but he was just not ready to listen to me and I was literally heartbroken that day. I wasn't upset just because I was losing out on something so big, but mostly because I had devoted 12 years of my life to this, only to get nothing in return. I hadn't even been able to win my father's respect for me because if he had any respect for the kind of work and effort that I had put into the business, he would not have kicked me out. That was the day that I decided to cut all ties with my family because I just had nothing left to say to them.

I had expected my sister to at least fight for me, but I was let down by her as well because they gladly accepted their so-called wedding gift, which was my life's work. My sister had always known that I wanted to take over our family business once my dad retired. I had literally been talking about it nonstop ever since I was 13 in all my life, I looked forward to it. So it wasn't as if she had not known that when she was accepting the wedding gift, she was accepting my dreams and taking them to be her own. She made a post about it on social media to thank our parents for this, and with that, she announced her engagement. After that, nobody from the family even bothered to reach out to me. And I think that was the most hurtful part of all, the fact that they did not even seem to care about me. The day that I had left my father's house argument, they stopped speaking to me,

and I felt like I had been used and 12 years of my life had gone to absolute waste. I was just thankful that I had enough savings to fall back on and for a couple of months, I could afford to not do anything and just try to put my life back together again because I felt like everything had fallen apart. That was eight months ago, and after that, I started therapy because I could tell that I was spiraling into a depression that needed to be addressed immediately or else, I don't know what I would have done. And I would feel really sick looking at all the posts that my sister would share, so I had to block her. I also had to tell my relatives that I was not in touch with them anymore, and I did not want to hear any more, and I did not want to hear any. about them. I literally requested them to not tell me anything that my family was up to, no matter how big it seemed, because I don't think I wanted to know anything about it.

And they respected it and kept everything secret from me. So I had no idea that for the past couple of months, my dad's health had been steadily deteriorating and my sister and her fiance couldn't care less about any of that. It was not until one week ago that I found out about all of that when I received a call for my dad and he told me that he was in the hospital because he had suffered a cardiac arrest in the middle of the night and he wanted me to come to see him in the hospital. I had blocked his phone number so he had to use somebody else's phone to call me and honestly, I felt super guilty about it. But then I remembered what he had done to me eight months ago, and I kind of felt less guilty. Anyway, once he had called me and told me that

he was suffering, I told him that I would be right there to see him. And so, I left everything and I went over to the hospital to check him out. My mother and my dad were there, but to my surprise, neither my sister nor her fiancé were anywhere to be found. I found that pretty confusing because as far as I was concerned, they were all really close, given that they were running the family business. I couldn't help myself and I ended up asking them about the whereabouts of my sister and her fiancé as soon as I walked into the hospital room. And my father told me, with great disappointment, that my sister was apparently too busy to come see him. And so was her fiancé. I found that shocking because as somebody who has been running the business for 12 years,

it's a lucrative thing and it pretty much works on its own, and unless there is some major crisis to deal with, we don't have to be present at our workplace at all times of the day. At least that's how it was when I used to run things, I can't say anything for how it is now. Anyway, when my dad told me that they were too busy to come see him, I asked him if they had been down there to the hospital to see him at all ever since he had his heart attack, and he told me that they hadn't. He had called them, but they had just texted back, replying that they were too busy and that they would come to see him once he had been discharged. These details were really shocking to me, and I guess my dad realized that he had made a great

mistake by handing over the reins of the business to my sister and her fiancé. So he told me that that was actually one of the main reasons that he had called me to apologize for what he had done. He told me that he was really guilty and regretful that he had kicked me out of the business in spite of all my hard work and effort, but now, he wanted to make things right with me and invite me back into the family and business. He told me what had happened, my sister and her fiancé not showing up at the hospital for him.

He had realized that they did not care about him the way he had them. He also told me that this is not even the first time that they have refused to show up for him and in the past couple of months, they have been sort of disconnected. He told me that after he had handed over the business to the two of them, they had started visiting him less and less. Whereas, earlier, they would be visiting him every other day to check up on him and how he was doing. When his health initially started deteriorating, they did not bother to come visit. him and always said that they were too busy at work, which is not something he believes because

both he and I knew that nobody was so busy that they couldn't take out an hour from their day. And especially them, given the fact that they lived just a couple of blocks away from my parents' house. Anyway, he never said anything about it, but now, they had crossed a line and my dad couldn't take this sort of disrespect anymore. So he wanted to take his company back and give it to the person who actually deserved it. We had a discussion about all of this in the hospital room and then he invited me to join the business back again and I was overjoyed. He apologized to me for everything and even though I'm still not completely over it, I did forgive him at that time because, to me, nothing was more important than getting back what I deserved. And if, for that, I had to forgive my

father, I was ready to do it. But the problem now is that he has had this conversation with my sister as well and he has told her that he wants her to step away because he has finally realized that, even though he has always cared about his daughter. She has never been there for him and he cannot tolerate this sort of disrespect anymore. So he was asking for his company back and was giving it to the person who actually deserved it.

And they could look out for themselves. Unsurprisingly, my sister is upset, and for some reason, she thinks that I am the one to blame for this. She called me up this morning and really, went off on me, telling me that I am a horrible human being and that she can't even believe that I'm doing something so cruel to her. I don't even understand why she's being so crazy about it. I feel like there is something that we don't know, but anyway, she's acting like she has lost everything and it's all because of me. But truth be told, I think it's her own fault that

she did not visit our dad in the hospital. I mean a cardiac arrest is a big deal and she could have taken time off of work to go see him. She was the one who had been selfish and now, I was getting what I actually deserved in the beginning. And eight months ago, she had absolutely no problem accepting a gift that she knew she did not deserve, so why should I turn my back on something that I actually do deserve? Anyway, she is pretty torn up about it, and I try to console her, but she just hung up on me in the middle of my sentence. And now I'm wondering if I'm the bad guy because clearly, every time something happens, I have to take the fall for it and I just feel really tired of this. Ida for allowing my father to ask my sister and her fiancé to step out of the

family business so I can get it. Update 1. Thank you guys so much for the response to my post. I kind of knew that I did not deserve the flack that I was getting from my sister, but hearing it from you guys just made me believe it even more. If even strangers who know nothing about our lives think that I deserve the business, then I have nothing more to say in my defense, and I don't even think that I need to. It has been a couple of days since my last conversation with my sister and so far, I have not heard back from her yet. She hasn't blocked me anywhere, so that's a good sign. But I just have this feeling that there is more to this than what she is telling us. Because I don't think that anybody who had a rich fiancé would act that way on losing out on our

business. I can't say for sure, but I have a theory that maybe all is not what it seems to be with her fiancé. Some of you had asked me about this in the comment section of the original post, but I did not say anything about it because I did not think that was relevant at the time, but now, I don't think that her fiancé and his family are doing well financially right now. Because from what I have heard, his dad's company is facing loss after loss and they have been unable to recover for the past year or so. And I think that this was their way of sneaking into our family business and then taking over eventually. I haven't been able to figure out why exactly my sister would behave the way that she did when she got to know that I was being asked to

rejoin the family business and she was being asked to step out. If she has a rich fiancé who has her own company, she has nothing to worry about. And yet, she was devastated. Something just did not add up and I think she's going to come around and tell us about it pretty soon. Anyway, we are just lucky that my father did not sign any documents or contracts and did not officially hand over the business to my sister and her fiancé because that would have caused a lot of trouble for us. He was still the CEO, they were just working under him in the position that I had previously. He was training them to take over eventually, but now, I don't think that's going to happen. I have spoken to my father and he told me that my

sister is very upset, but he can't afford to care about that right now. His only priority is to just sign over everything to me and then, I can handle it all. So that's what he's going to do. He's already speaking to a lawyer and having the papers drawn up, so I can take over as soon as possible and it can be made formal and official. I'm really just very excited and I don't even think that my sister's dramatic outbursts can put a damper on this for me right now. Update 2, Hi, so it's been a couple of weeks since my post here and I just wanted to tell you guys that I am officially the new CEO of my dad's jewelry business. The handover is complete now and I am officially one in charge, which feels so good to say. I knew that this day was going to come, but there were a couple of delays in the process because of my sister.

Coming to her, she is absolutely not happy about any of this and I guess I can finally say it now, my theory about it was true. She and her fiancé were actually, very cleverly, trying to sneak their way into our family business and take over so that they would have something to fall back on when her fiancé's father finally let go of his company. It was my sister who had planted the idea of welcoming them back into the family by handing over the business to his future son-in-law and my father's head, and he had unfortunately fallen for it. I only discovered all of this recently, after reconnecting with my father, and he told me that he was not thinking straight. He was being greedy because he had believed that for some reason, a man from such an established business family would be better at handling everything than I would be. He had originally intended on retaining me in the position that I had been working in so far, but when I told him that I was not interested in the business if I did not get to be

the head of the company, he lost his temper and that led to these eight months of absolute misery for both of us. Thankfully, he came back to his senses in the nick of time and we were able to avoid a huge disaster. Because right now, the credibility of my sister's fiancé and his father in the market is absolutely zero. I had been hearing from people about rumors of his father's business being on the verge of getting shut down, but I hadn't believed it because I was sure that my dad would reach out to me if something like this was about to happen. And my father had thought I would reach out to him if something of this magnitude was going to happen. And so, neither of us

reached out to each other. Which was pretty foolish of us, but anyway, now my sister herself has confessed what she was trying to do and kept her ego aside to speak to me. She reached out to me a couple of days ago, just before it was finalized that I would become the CEO, and she told me that she and her fiancé desperately needed jobs because they were not sure of how many more days his dad would be able to stick it out. So now, she was asking me for help and I told her that I would think about it. I don't have an issue with hiring them, it's just that I will never ever be able to trust them again because I knew what their original intentions were. So that's what I'm kind of feeling weird about right now. I do want to help her out, but at the same time, how can I even

hire people whom I don't trust? Anyway, I told her to give me some time and she has agreed to do that so far, but I don't know what I'm going to do. Update 3, hey, so I have decided not to hire my sister and her fiancé. I know this will probably make me seem really selfish to some people, but honestly, I can't trust these people. When my dad had offered them to take over the company at first, they had accepted it and they haven't even bothered to reach out to me for the next eight months. They had absolutely zero compassion or empathy for anybody apart from themselves, and I don't want people like that around me or working for me. So with a heart, I had to tell my sister that I couldn't help her out.

Obviously, she did not take it too well. She showed up in my office the other day and through a tantrum, accusing me of being heartless and selfish, and she told me that she regretted ever even letting me have the company back. I thought that was weird because she did not have any part to play in that, it was my father's decision because he was the head and whatever he said. It was not my decision when she and right now it is not her decision. So for her to act as if she did a huge favor to me was just ridiculous.

I would have tolerated all of that, but that statement just really annoyed me. So I told her that she did not do me any favors, not now and even previously, she did not seem to care about me. So it's pretty stupid of her to expect me to do the same for her. I asked her politely but she refused and kept screaming at me. She was totally undermining me so I decided to call the police and have her escorted out because I couldn't deal with this level of drama. I'm already pretty busy with work and I just don't need this right now. But then once the cop showed up, she did not have much to say and just left. It has been a few days since then, and we haven't heard back from her, so I am assuming that she should leave us alone.

And even if she doesn't, I don't care because I'll get a restraining order against her. I hope you enjoy this story. Colleague embraced me and referred to me as her office spouse. When I declined her advances, she manipulated fabricated communications to have the recent staff member dismissed, and now she is spreading tales to my spouse. Me being in her hotel. I, 34M, work in a small office and we have about 30 people working here. Mary, 35F, is one of my co-workers. We have been working together for six years now.

We have six people in our department, and we have to frequently travel across the state as our work involves overseeing government projects. We always travel in a group of two. Although my travel partner changes based on the project, Mary and I are generally put on similar projects and enjoy each other's company. My wife also likes Mary. Overall, we have a very healthy work relationship. On to the incident. Yesterday, we had a happy hour in our office, and we were all drinking after work hours and chatting. It was a group of around ten people that stayed back.

Mary was blabbering about how we both have been traveling together so much in the last year. She was roasting me for my habits while traveling like always forgetting stuff in my hotel room, being sweaty and stinky when I join her for breakfast in mornings, because I go to hotel gym. Everyone was laughing and she was making it sound how unbearable I was to tag along, all in good fun. I also told some funny and sweet stories about her and agreed with her saying that I can be difficult to be with sometimes. Mary came to me and hugged me tightly and told me that she loves me, and I am her work husband. It was all innocent on surface, but she might have been a bit drunk and just didn't let go of her tight hug. Also, I hate that phrase as I do have a wife that I promise to be with forever, and not just in non-working hours.

After a few seconds, I started becoming uncomfortable and also saw a few people staring at us. So, to defuse the situation, I took her hands off my shoulder and told her, she was my work sister and that is why I love to annoy her so much. That seemed to have upset Mary and she left and went back to her desk and was sobbing silently. I tried to apologize to her, but she told me how embarrassing the whole situation was. She said that she just meant work husband in platonic way, but me calling her work sister made her sound like a creep in front of the whole office. She was also angry that I aggressively removed her hands from my shoulders while hugging. I tried to reason with her that I do not like the work husband phrase and also people gave dirty looks when she said it. So, I was just trying to make sure people do not take her work.

words in the wrong way. We talked for a few minutes afterwards and Mary calmed down. She hugged me again and left. I felt really guilty afterwards because I can see Mary's point. I made her sound like a creep by implying that she meant something inappropriate when she called me her work husband. However, I was a bit uncomfortable in that situation and just did not want people to call us that, or assume something wrong. Am I the awe for calling Mary my work sister? I am sitting in my office writing this and a bit worried if I embarrassed Mary in front of everyone. Update 1, a lot of you are asking for update, so I am writing it here. Thanks everyone for your comments and giving me confidence that I did not do anything wrong or inappropriate.

As I was sitting in office the next day, I knew things would be a bit awkward between Mary and me. Mary ignored me the whole morning. Initially, I was planning to go and apologize to her, but after the post, I decided, I decided that I do not need to do that as I should be the one who was offended. Everyone in the office could see that we were acting weird, and I heard some people gossiping about us. One of the ladies also came to me and asked me if I want to talk about Mary and me. Around 3 p.m. in the afternoon, I was sitting in my office working. Mary came into my office and closed the door behind her.

She was angry at me and started saying that I need to stop being an asshole and stop ignoring her. I told her to sit and to talk about what is going on. She told me that she feels humiliated, and everyone has been starting at her the whole morning because of what I did. I also stood my ground and told her that I was okay with her making fun of me, but calling me her work husband and hugging me in front of everyone for a long time made the situation awkward. She told me to get over myself and that I should know exactly what she meant. Mary said that I made a big deal of what was supposed to be a joke and made it awkward for

everyone. She said calling someone work husband is a normal thing and just means that she knows me intimately like a spouse would. She said that because we spend so much time traveling together, she knows all the intimate details of how I behave outside work. I stopped her and told her that I felt offended by the term work husband because I have a wife and I do not want people to use that term to describe our relationship. I told her that she would not understand as she is single, but as a married man, I really do not want anyone to describe me as a husband in any capacity. She said that I am again misinterpreting what she was saying. She felt that as we have known each other more time than I have been married, she knows me more

intimately than even my wife. I have no idea why she feels that way, and I also behave like her husband when we travel together. She went on about how we go out to dinners together after work, how I always insist on having breakfast together in morning to plan our actions of the day, and I walk around in my underwear, referring to my gym shorts, around her in mornings. She also talked about how we spend hours talking to each other during road trips and how I am the only man she can trust with any secret in her life. She said that I am the definition of work husband, and I am just in denial. I was a bit angry at this point. I told her that I do all that because I consider her my friend

and she is delusional if she feels she knows me more intimately than my wife. I told her I do not want to hear that term again and it is extremely disrespectful to my marriage. Only one woman gets to call me her husband and that is my wife. Moreover, if my actions are giving her such ideas, maybe we need to stop being friends. She became apologetic afterwards and told me that she did not mean to disrespect my wife, and it was not her intention. She apologized to me and told me to just let it go. She said that she loves traveling with me and she does not want anything to change between us.

She again said that I am misinterpreting her statement and just wants to move on. She came to hug me again, but I just told her it was okay and stepped back. I also talked to my wife about the incident that night. As expected, my wife was angry at Mary and told me that she hates the term work husband. She asked me if Mary has ever flirted with me during our trips or has a crush on me. I truthfully told her that I really have not felt that way and she may have just said that because she was a bit drunk and is now being stubborn about it. My wife said that she feels a bit uncomfortable about Mary now and says that it strike one

for Mary and I need to try and put more distance between us while traveling. If she ever repeat the same behavior again, I should report her to HR. I promised my wife that I would try to reduce my interactions with Mary outside work hours and be more guarded around update too. Thanks everyone for the comments and explaining the urgency of the situation. I discussed it with my wife and have set up meetings with my manager and HR today. I plan to not file a complaint, but document what happened last week and why it made me uncomfortable. I do not have any upcoming travels this week due to holidays but have to travel next Tuesday with her to a work site. I will discuss with my manager on what my options are.

However, I feel a little distance between Mary and me for some time would be the right solution for now. Update 3, September 3, 2024, I wrote a while ago regarding my co-worker friend, Mary, being upset with me for calling her my work sister when she called me her work husband in front of everyone. I'm sorry to leave everyone hanging, but the next few weeks were busy, and the issue was eventually resolved. Thanks to everyone for the comments, they really helped me when I talked to my manager about the situation. However, the last week has been crazy, so I wanted to get some opinions on what I should do next. After my last post, my wife and I were no longer comfortable with Mary's behavior. Although a part of me thought I was overreacting and that it was just part of Mary's personality,

I felt the need to protect myself. I requested a meeting with my manager and HR to document my side of the story. I wrote down everything and told them about the incident at the party, as well as Mary coming into my office and the comments she made. I made it clear that while I did not want them to take action against her, I wanted to emphasize that her behavior made me uncomfortable, especially her comments about knowing me better than my wife and remarks about my shorts. My manager had already heard about the incident at the happy hour, as everyone in the office

was talking about it. He told me he would try to shake up the travel schedule to minimize our travel together. The issue was that only four people in our company generally work on off-site audits, and the other two co-workers did not want to split up because they claimed they worked well together. As a result, I continued traveling with Mary for the next couple of weeks, but it was awkward, and I kept my distance. My manager then called Mary and me to his office and informed us that he was planning to train a new auditor, Carolina, 26F, and set up a schedule where she would travel with me for one week and then with Mary the following week. We were asked to train her.

I liked this arrangement because it meant I no longer had to travel with Mary. Carolina turned out to be a great travel buddy, and I made sure not to get too comfortable with her. I always dressed professionally when we went for breakfasts, avoided late-night drinks, and maintained healthy boundaries. Things were great until last week. Last Tuesday, I could feel everyone staring at me when I entered the office, and I was immediately called to a meeting with my manager and HR.

H.R. asked if I had anything to report regarding Carolina and if she had made any advances toward me during our work trips. I told them no, that Carolina had been very professional the entire time. I asked why I was being interrogated, and they told me they couldn't disclose any further details. but that Carolina was being investigated by HR for inappropriate conduct. I left the meeting and Mary came to my office, asking what had happened. She mentioned that she was also told Carolina would no longer be traveling with us

and that we were asked to travel together again. I told her I had no idea what was going on. I messaged Carolina to see if she was okay and if she needed to talk. She asked if she could come to my office, and I agreed. Carolina explained that someone anonymously sent messages to her boyfriend, posing as someone from the office over the weekend. The message included screenshots of Carolina sending some inappropriate pictures she had taken in her hotel rooms during our travels and flirtatious messages. This person claimed to her boyfriend that Carolina was trying to cheat with him at work, and he was just trying to warn them. Her boyfriend went crazy after seeing the pictures, ghosted her, and then sent the messages to HR as revenge.

Carolina was in tears, telling me that she had only taken those pictures for her boyfriend and had no idea how they got leaked or how those messages even existed. Her boyfriend was furious because he also received the exact pictures from Carolina and knew they weren't fake. I consoled Carolina, but she's in deep trouble, as our workplace takes such things very seriously, because we work on government contracts, and I'm sure everyone suspects I am the anonymous messenger. I was told that the matter would be investigated, and Mary and I would be working together on the project again. My manager said there was nothing he could do and also mentioned that they might go through my emails and messages on my company phone as part of the investigation into Carolina. Mary seems very happy about the whole situation and keeps talking about how excited she is to revisit the restaurants and bars we use to frequent during off-site trips. She also keeps referring to Carolina as that pervert. The whole thing is just crazy.

My wife, of course, believes that I would never do anything inappropriate with Carolina and that I wasn't the anonymous messenger. However, her conspiracy theory is that Mary, who was also traveling with Carolina, may have unlocked her phone and accessed the photos. It feels far-fetched, but the fact is, I'm not thrilled about traveling with Mary again. I don't think I have any other recourse to get off this project except leaving the job, which isn't possible. at this time. I know many of you work in HR, and I would appreciate any advice I can do next. Update December 4, 17, 2024. I wrote a post six months ago regarding calling my coworker, Mary, work sister, and upsetting her in the process. Things got really weird afterwards and I was paired with another coworker, Carolina for work trips. Someone anonymously tipped Carolina's

boyfriend that Carolina was engaged in messaging explicit pictures to her co-worker and he in turn reported her to our HR as revenge before breaking off with her. No one explicitly said it, but I could see that everyone suspected me to be the other person. After that, Mary and I were again asked to travel together despite of my reservations, mostly because others did not want to travel with me. I am sorry I did not write an update because nothing noteworthy happened until last Friday and my wife, Brooke, and I have been arguing ever since about what to do next. I have been applying for similar positions in the last few months, but it is hard to find a similar job in this market. Brooke has expressed her reservations on me traveling with Mary but also understands that I

would stop traveling with her if I could. We have bills and mortgage, and I cannot just leave my job. Just like most commenters on previous post, she believes that Mary framed Carolina. I have been extremely professional with Mary during our travels. Things are not as before where I would consider her my close friend. I am always guarded around her and try to spend most of my time in my room after work. Carolina stuck around for around a month after I wrote the post, when the HR was investigating the incident. I tried to support her initially and also told my manager that she has been very professional. However, rumors started spreading around that I am going above and beyond to save her job, and she spent a lot of time in my office talking to me alone. We mutually decided that

the optics were not good and started distancing ourselves. She resigned a month after the incident because she told me she cannot take it anymore. From what I know, she is still looking for a job. Mary, on the other hand, seems to be happy on our work trips. Although I act extremely professional around her, a part of me knows that she might be the person who framed Carolina, I have no proof, just intuition. I also feel Mary is the one spreading rumor about Carolina and me in office. She always plans for dinners after work and sometimes asks me to get a drink at the hotel bar as before. I generally avoid drinking on these trips now. There were a few times where she insisted that I get a but I told her that I am already on thin ice at work and promised Brooke I will not drink on

these trips. This has not stopped her from getting hammered and me having to drop her to her room at the end of the day few times. Brooke has been very supportive through the whole time and has never once suspected me or blamed me for anything. She has asked me to not drink on these trips and also to make sure I call her every night when I reach my room and when I go to sleep. I also voluntarily installed location tracking app on my phone, so that she has a peace of mind to know where I am during these trips. On to the incident from last Friday. We had a Christmas party last Friday at our office. Brooke joined me, and the party was great. Mary asked me for a dance, but I declined, and Mary did not look thrilled about it. Brooke was lovely, and we danced together for most of the night. There was one point where I was talking to me.

to my manager and few other collogues, and Brooke was talking to my manager's wife. Mary interrupted them and started bragging about how she has to take care of me during work trips since I am so clumsy. Brooke also joined in on how I am clumsy and forgetful I am at home. Mary then told Brooke that I make her feel safe on the trips and told her about the incident where she got drunk and how I took care of her by dropping her to her room and sitting by her bedside until she fell asleep. Mary insisted that I am a gentleman and nothing happened, but how I also show care for her. Brooke knew about the incidents when I dropped, he to her room. However, at no time did I enter Mary's room. Brooke did not say anything at that time,

but when we got home, this turned into a huge argument. I told Brooke that I did not enter her room and just let her to her room and immediately called her and told her about the incident. I even showed her the text conversation where I messaged Brooke after leaving the restaurant and when I got to the room along with timestamps. After Brooke calmed down, she told me that she believes me, but it's crazy how fluently Mary lied to her, in front of my manager's wife. She told me that Mary is just trying to plant a seat of doubt in her head, and she cannot pretend anymore that she is okay with Mary. She told me that Mary. She told me that Mary, that Mary, ruined Carolina's career and if she does not get her way, she might do the same to me.

Brooke has asked me if I can draw a red line on traveling with Mary, and if my manager does not accept, I should just resign. I feel Brooke is right, and nothing is more important to me than her. However, it feels so shitty to be in this situation where all my hard work to reach this point in my career will be ruined. I do not know what to do next. I am really hoping to get advice and ideas on what I can do here. I just feel so trapped and not sure what I can do at this point. Next story, mom told me my biological dad abandoned us before I was born. So I messaged him 20 years later to tell him off, and learned my mom never told him she was pregnant. The story I got told at 14 was that my dad wasn't my biological father, he was the man who married my mom after I was

already born, and basically my mom and dad thought at the time I deserved to know this because a few people in our environment kept saying how I didn't look like him and I was asking them if I was maybe adopted or something. Yeah, I know, very little was spoken of the man my mom got pregnant with, but the basic gist of it was that he didn't care about mom being pregnant, didn't want a child in the first place and then she didn't want anything to do with him any further, so she cut all contact. No child support because my mom's family is well off. I won't bullshit you and say I wasn't hurt, but I got over it quickly enough with the help of my mom and dad. Sadly, mom and dad got a divorce last year, just felt like they didn't love each other

that way anymore, I guess. They're still good friends with each other though, no drama, for which I'm grateful. Still, this sort of prompted me into thinking about my biological father lately and I ended looking him up online. To know what I expected to see really, but he's just, normal, I guess. I might have been thinking he'd have this kind of asshole look to him because of how he rejected me before I was even born. Anyway, one night after drinking more than I should with some friends on a night out, I did a stupid thing and sent him a message, basically accusing him how he's horrible, evil, and other less polite words, because of how he abandoned me. Next morning, after I actually remembered what I did, I see his reply to me. It's polite,

but confused and he has no idea who I am or how I'm supposed to be related to him. I had my dad's last name, saying in the end that I probably got the wrong person and wishing me the best. I don't know, it just pissed me off, even though I was sober and a bit hung over, so I fired up several paragraphs to him about who exactly I am, who my mom is and what he did to us. His reply came in the evening and it was quite extensive, but I'll sum it up for you, they broke up with each other, on bad terms, after they were together for a little over a year. She never mentioned any pregnancy to him and when he tried to contact him. her later afterwards, because he felt like shit how it ended, she rebuffed him and blocked him

and that was the last time he tried getting in touch with her. Needless to say, me being pissed off at him was gone in a flash, and now my father was the one angry at my mom for doing this. I was wondering how to talk to my mom about what I found out, but I didn't have to bother, because my father contacted her first and confronted her about her hiding me from him. We're getting to know each other slowly, mostly over the internet, though we talked to a few times over a video chat, because he doesn't live in the same country as us. It'll be time soon enough to meet IRL and I'm nervous like hell, but by all accounts and the way he's talked to me, and held back on sharing me with the rest of his family, I think I'm

going to like him a lot. Why the fuck did she do it? She says she has no idea why she really did this, blames it on pregnancy and stuff, but I don't see how the pregnancy could have influenced her for my whole life. I love her, but there's times when it's just the two of us and I can't help but hating her for denying the both of us a chance to know each other as I grew up. I can tell my father is heard about this, though he doesn't talk about it directly. And my mom probably can guess how I feel, given that she just starts tearing up at times she sees I'm angry or being curt with her. I'm split in half, happy when I'm talking with my father, but mad like hell when I talked to my mom after.

I want all this to get better, but at the same time, I want her to hurt. What do I do now? Update, I found out why she told me the lie that my biological father didn't want me. It's maddeningly simple and stupid. She was basically getting to know my dad, her now ex-husband, and he wanted to know about my father's involvement in our lives. Put on the spot, she made out this ridiculous story about how he didn't really care for having a child, they didn't keep in touch and over the years it evolved into a fucking theater play,

which is what I got years down the line when I asked about my father. My dad, I guess, didn't want to put salt unwound, so he just avoided that subject in the future, until I asked about it. That's it. That's the whole reason why I didn't know my father for my whole life up until recently. No, really. Because she didn't want to look like some spiteful, crazy woman who neglected to tell someone. someone there a father, she made this up. Which is some bitter irony for her, because she does

look like a crazy and spiteful woman with the lies she told about my father. I am so mad at her. I can still barely control my anger around her. All I want to do is hurt her until she feels really hurt like I was when I found I missed out on knowing my father all along and am getting to know me as well. I restrain myself more often than not, but God damn, this isn't something that's going to be just pushed to the side. I don't know what we'll do, and I know that sometime in the future I'll probably reestablish having a good relationship with my mother, but right now, it's just not happening. But on the brighter side of things, I met my father. Some people mentioned in the last thread that I should be careful how, when and where I met him. Someone thought I would be flying out of our

country to meet him, I think. But given how everyone that knew him back then and now had nothing but good to say about him, I connected with my father's side of the family, have plenty of cousins, aunts, uncles, and so on to talk with and meet, and it's a bit overwhelming just how many of them are there and how overjoyed they were to find about me, I gave him a few dates when we could meet and he picked this last weekend. He flew back on the Friday, visited his parents, my grandparents, and man, that's so weird, how I have another set of grandparents to the whole mix, and then we met up. I really don't know what I was expecting. I mean, yes, we talked and he seemed very understanding and kind and good and so very interested in meeting me,

but I guess there was just that fucked up fear of him not liking what he actually saw and leaving, no, really, thanks for this shit, Mom. It didn't matter in the least. As soon as we met, there was just this moment, I don't know how to describe it, I don't really think I ever had anything like that before and he just hugged me and I could feel him shaking, I think he was holding himself back from crying, and I started crying for no real reason, and then we talked and just spent the rest of the day together. We pretty much spent the whole weekend together, from the moment I got up we talked,

and by the time he was boarding his flight I didn't want him to leave ever again, and he won't, not really. He wanted to know everything about me, and I literally mean everything. And I guess what really made me actually love him is him asking to meet my dad, asking me if that was okay with me, and then thanking him for his part in raising me. They talked some more with each other while I was busy with something else, and I think they became sort of friends, I don't really know what to call their relationship. So to all of you who helped me deal with my fucked up situation, thank you, from the bottom of my

heart, thank you. Even if it seemed like I was just venting out loud on the internet. Thank you. Thank you all. Except those one or two people who thought, my father is a rapist and an abuser, seriously WTF. I hope you enjoy this story. Discovered my spouse being unfaithful when we linked her device to our latest television, and it appears she was terminated for disclosing information and is now under scrutiny. Bit of background, we've been married for 22 years and we have one son, 19. Like any marriage we've had scuffles here and there but nothing that we haven't been able to get over. In fact, I felt we had a great marriage.

with great communication, mutual attraction, and a satisfying sex life. We both share a love for the outdoors so we were constantly on the go and staying active, hiking, camping or just taking long walks. We've always taken care of ourselves and made an effort to stay in pretty good shape because we talked about growing old together and being able to do things when we're old and gray. I work as a paramedic and over the last nine months, my shifts had gotten a bit twist turned around. I've had to work mainly night shifts and picked up a lot of extra shifts.

She works as a litigation consultant and has been working from home for a little less than a year. When my wife made the transition to WFH, it wasn't her idea. Her firm actually moved towards liquid talent and she told me everyone started working from home, but I remember her making a big stink about it and how she wasn't going to be able to see her clients and colleagues face to face as much, which makes building relationships and trust so hard. I remember her being strongly against it, and so much so that she was debating on leaving her work. Trust? Hmm, how ironic. Remember this for later. Anyway, my night shifts made things a bit distant between us since our schedules suddenly didn't really overlap anymore. Although she'd be

at home working, I'd be sleeping. When I'd be getting ready to to go to work, I thought she was settling in for the night and getting ready for bed. But when we were both off at the same time or our schedules mashed up nicely, we seemed to be just fine. We were close. We played around, we had fun with each other. There was nothing out of the ordinary or anything that tipped me off that anything was going on behind my back. Our marriage felt fine. She'd talked to me about her week. She'd text me during the day while I was sleeping telling me that she missed me or she saw something funny and thought of me. She made me meals that I'd eat when I woke up and she'd pack me lunch. Recently my brother came over to help me install a Chromecast I got through a contest at work. It happened to be a random day off I had and my brother was in town from his shift work and I hadn't seen him in a while so I decided to ask him for some help with this. We were having fun taking turns connecting our phones to the TV and watching videos and listening to music, just decking around. My wife comes out from her office after

she was done with work and she asks what we're doing and I tell her that he's helping connect my phone to the TV for our new Chromecast. I ask her if she wants my brother to help her download the app on her phone so she can use it too and she hesitates at first and looks at the TV and then looks back at me. And I'm like it's super simple, you just have to download an app. Takes like two seconds. Finally she caves, but it looks like she's texting someone or going through her phone right before she passes it to my brother. At the time, I didn't really think anything of this. My brother starts going through the process of connecting her phone and getting it recognized and she asks how long it's going to take. My brother says something like maybe two minutes.

And she's like, okay, I'm just going to go to the washroom quick. Before she walks away, she turns back around and says, You're just downloading an app, right? And he's like, yeah. So she leaves to go to the washroom and my brother and I are having drinks on the couch and we're not really paying attention while he's going through these easy steps to connect the thing. Not even 10 seconds after that, he connects her phone to the screen and as a joke, he opens up her messages and there's a contact that's named just a heart emoji.

He looks at me and starts laughing thinking that he's going to find something juicy in there between her and I. I'm like a viewer discretion advised. And he starts scrolling through this thread and see some pretty raunchy things being said back and forth and he's calling me cheeky and a dirty dog and saying things like he didn't know I had it in me. I will say, it wasn't beyond my wife and I to say some pretty interesting things to one another while she was getting ready for bed and I was just starting my shift. So at first, I did think that this was a message thread between the two of us. But as I'm looking closer at the thread, I'm realizing that this isn't between me and my wife.

At one point, she starts calling this guy Craig. At another point, there's some nudes exchanges and let's just say that the male extremity definitely wasn't mine. My brother sees my reaction and he starts scrolling through slowly this time, trying to read whatever he can, and then realizes the same thing. My stomach dropped and my brother stopped laughing. The text basically reads something about a certain body part of Craig's being in my wife's mouth. My brother got up and handed me the phone and suddenly told me he had to go and quickly left.

I didn't blame him. I got up and started videoing what I was seeing on the screen. And as I heard the toilet flush, I exited the messages and dropped the phone on the couch and quickly ran out onto our porch to make it look like I had been sitting out there the entire time. After about five minutes or so, she comes onto the porch and she asks me how long I've been outside for. I told her my brother and I went to sit out there as soon as she left the living room. She looked relieved and then played it off like nothing happened and sat down next to me. I got up to walk back inside to pretend to grab another beer and saw that she had disconnected her phone from the TV and now it's just a black screen. This was eating me alive.

I had to go on a quick run after that just to wrap my head. head around what I saw and to blow off some steam. I was also trying to think of ways I could get back on her phone again to send those messages to myself and to see just how far this really went. For some reason, I just had to see more. Later that night I come up with this BS excuse that I have to redownload the app on our phones because something went wrong with the Chromecast. She's not necessarily all that tech savvy. She usually makes me do anything techy around the house whenever it comes to the internet, or she thinks I can diagnose anything to do with the TV, the internet, or our phones. She makes me download coupon apps and little wordle things on her

phone, so I knew if I'd said something like I need to redownload something, she'd likely believe me and give me the phone back. Later that night, I'm pretending to screw around with the TV before she goes for a bath. Just as she gets in the bath, I come in and I'm like, ah, I gotta re-download this app on our phones because I accidentally unplugged something and it just fucked up everything. She looks at me a bit worried and she's like, I don't really need to be connected to it. And I'm like, ah, it'll take me like two minutes. Super easy. Then you just have it on your phone and we don't have to worry about it later.

She's like I'll get out of the bath and help. And I'm like, no, no, you had a long day, just sit back and relax, I'll be two seconds. She reluctantly hands me her phone and she's looking concerned. Then she tells me to be careful and not to go through anything because she has some confidential client information on there. I kind of come back and say why she's having client conversations on her personal phone when she has something set up on her computer for that. She tells me that the system on her laptop was down for a bit and therefore she had to use her cell. Yeah. Whatever. I tell her no worries, I'm just downloading this app.

and then reconnecting it. She asks me if I should call my brother back and if I'm capable of doing that myself. But she says this in a way that really rubs me the wrong way. As if she's telling me that I'm weak or something or not good enough. Either way, I felt like it was a dig at me. I tell her if I have any problems that I'll call him and I walk out of the bathroom. We've never been ones to snoop on each other's phones. Up until this moment, I felt like I never had to.

We've always known the passwords to each other's phones, but never once have I ever snooped or checked in on what she was doing. I've always trusted her implicitly. And yeah, I guess since she's worked from home, she's been a bit more protective of it, but I chalked that up to just work. Or that maybe work was getting a bit overwhelming so she was just playing mindless games on it to decompress. Turns out she was decompressing with someone else other than me with someone else in her mouth. right under my nose. Right as I'm sleeping during the day or working my ass off for us in the wee hours of the morning trying to bring junkies back to life downtown. I felt like an absolute schmuck.

I honestly, 100% had no idea that anything was going on and I feel like a fool for not seeing it or even letting it happen. I had to work fast but I managed to scroll far back enough to see that the communication between my wife and Craig started last May, which was over a year of. ago. I screened recorded what I could so I could just go back and pause and read later and I sent it to myself via email and then deleted it from her photo slash videos and her sent box. Meanwhile, she's yelling at me from the bathroom asking if everything is okay because I've reached the five minute mark by this time and I'm trying to play a cool saying that I'm having a problem with my phone and she's asking me to bring her phone back. I go bring back her phone and she asks me if everything is okay and I'm like yeah.

Figured it out. And I walk back into the living room. From there I'm going through this video that I sent myself and reading just months worth of filth. My son no longer lives in the house with us, he lives with his buddies in a condo downtown, so I thought my wife was alone in the evenings while I was working. Nope. This guy, Craig, would come over and they'd have their way with each other while I was at work.

Not only that, but he's even snuck over while I've been asleep in bed. This was all so rough to read. I ended up finding out Craig's last name from his Instagram page because she follows him on Instagram. Which, by the way, they send each other sexy memes and lingerie ads and what have you on there too. From there I look up Craig and quickly find that he's an attorney for a firm that my wife does work for. He started in March of last year. He looked like a pretty young guy. Maybe in his late 30s, early 40s.

I saw red. I went back to the screen recording and went through it slowly. It looks like she broke the news to Craig that she'd be working from home around the same time she told me. She was upset about the fact that she wasn't going to see him during the week at all. This looked earlier on in whatever sort of thing they had going on, but from there it quickly progressed because he said that he'd have to take her out for drink. and they could catch up there. Then shortly after I started working nights and extra shifts, she told him that he could come over for lunch or start coming over because her husband,

a.k.a. me, was sleeping, but that they'd have to be quiet. I was sick to my stomach reading this. Now I'm here. It's been a few days since D-Day and I'm trying to think of my next move, but I just wanted to write this out and see if anyone has some good advice out there. I really don't want to get screwed in this. I mean, my wife works for lawful. and knows her shit and knows people who can really take everything from me. I just have to be careful here. This whole thing just has me really fucked up.

Update 1, I met with a lawyer. Before I get into that I just wanted to give a thanks to everyone who reached out and lent some advice and some tough love. I needed to hear all of it. So yeah, I met with a lawyer. First off, I ended up calling my brother and telling him what else I found and he's been a really great support system through all of this. He actually reminded me of the friends that my STBX and I made through her work. It's a husband and wife who run their own firm. My STBX used to do some consulting

for them a few years back. They were close enough that they would come over for dinner every now and again and we went out for dinner a couple of different times, and maybe a Christmas party here and there, but we ended up not seeing or hearing from them too much after my STBX's contract ended with their firm which was maybe a year ago. My brother encouraged me to reach out and said that I just needed to be honest with them. He said that if my STBX was good enough to work for them, it meant they were good at what they did. He was right. So I reached out to the husband and told him exactly what was happening but asked that he keep this just between the two of us because I didn't truly know the relationship that my STBX had with the wife still and if they were close.

I didn't want to risk her finding out. Anyways, he got back to me right away and basically laid everything out for me. He told me to send him the video of the text thread between her and Craig. He said send him copies of financial documents, account statements, and whatever else. He told me to open up separate accounts that I should start depositing my money into and try to take out money here and there from our joint accounts until things go down, but to not make it suspicious. He said since our son is 19 and living on his own, I don't have to worry about it. custody or anything like that, and said that once the papers are served to her to consider living arrangements and who's going where or who's staying where. I told him I wanted to keep the

house. He said just not to discuss divorce details or badmouth her or anything like that. I haven't named names other than Craig so I feel like we're good here. She doesn't even know what read it is, as far as I know. But yeah, so the papers are getting made up. My wife significantly more money than I do. He said I may be entitled to alimony or spousal support. We have a few investments but those were actually made separately and she can't take any of mine and I'm not entitled to any of hers. We don't actually have any debts either. She paid off her student loan long ago and I didn't have any loans like that. The biggest thing we own together is our house, which I love. We've lived in it for 12 years and I really don't want to have to get

rid of it if I don't have to, but I know I can't afford it on my own. Update 2, the papers were served to my ex. I told her I wasn't leaving the house and that she had to leave. She told me that this was basically her office and I said she can find somewhere else to work. I told her she wasn't working half the time anyways, she was inviting Craig over and fucking him while her own husband lay in bed a few feet away. She tried to threaten me and told me that I had no idea what I was getting myself into. but the threats were empty ones because I knew she was just scared.

She knew exactly who my lawyer was. After that, I told her that she had to break the news to our son. I told her that she had to tell him everything and I said he had to hear it from her or else I'd show him the threat of messages between her and Craig. He completely sided with me. My ex tried to apologize to him and he didn't seem to have it. He actually encouraged her to move out of the house to give Dad some space. And after that, she packed up and moved out.

My son has also been incredible through all of this. He's checking in on me almost every day and we've been seeing a lot more of each other, which has been nice. Here's where things get a little juicy. What I didn't know when I contacted my attorney was that he was one of the best family law attorneys in the country. But my wife apparently knew because she tried to contact me and apologize and take back everything to which I said it was too late for any of that.

What was really interesting was when she said that her and Craig would pay me to be silent because it would ruin their careers. She said that she really messed up and she doesn't know how to fix things but desperately wants to fix things with me. My lawyer actually let me in on something, I guess while my ex was working for him. She started getting cozy with a partner of the firm and leaking information. They found out and they weren't going to have that so they gracefully dissolved that relationship and then they terminated her contract. So I guess the consulting firm that my ex worked for caught wind of this and wasn't okay with that either. Because they know their way around the legal system, I mean, it's their job, it took them a while to give her a slap on the wrist, but once they did, her punishment was. Drumroll please having her work from home.

Basically house arrest. So everything she's been telling me has been a lie. Her firm never went to liquid talent and her contract never ended naturally with my attorney. they terminated it and it all makes sense now why we stopped hearing from them and seeing them out of nowhere i just thought that it might have been awkward after the contract ended but little did i know it was awkward for an entirely different reason update three well we settled she ended up giving me a large lump sum of money instead of months of alimony which i used to buy out what was left on the house and then some so the house is now officially mine thank goodness she tried really desperately to get back with me until the very end so much so that i had to tell my attorney and then communication was moved to only between attorneys it just got too weird and i wasn't having it and i wasn't interested in getting back together or trying to make things work. Because of what was going down with Craig,

she ended up losing the contract with that firm too and now she's under investigation. Rumor is that she's been aiding attorneys and breaching attorney-client privilege. Some colleagues or clients started noticing irregularities and information handling and discrepancies in case details or unusual access to confidential information. There were recorded conversations and messages and emails

that were shared without the proper authorization. I guess in layman's terms that means she knew things she shouldn't have and then told that to attorneys for the benefit of their case. So now a formal investigation was launched to the State Bar Association for breach of attorney-client privilege and other violations. But that's not the best part. This all traveled within the legal community which led to rumors about different practices involvement and unethical practices. It's just a giant fuck baggery of shit. But I'm laughing. She did it to herself.

I'm out of there and I have my house and the best son a father could ever ask for. Now on to the next story. Story 2. Daughter cut me off for 17 years after my affair, she called to reconnect, but I refused. Now I have apologized and she's visiting with my grandkid before I move overseas. I am not sure if am I in awe, going to provide some background. I am in my 60s now. I was married to my ex-wife, and we had a daughter.

Our marriage was going through its ups and downs, but I was really close with our daughter. But as our marriage was going through its difficulties, I made a huge mistake I still regret to this day. I started having an affair with my co-worker. She was in an inviolent physically abusive relationship at home. We became friends at work, and things just escalated from there. She got an out from me, she got the support she needed to fire. for divorce from her husband, who is currently in jail now. The affair went nowhere and we called it off shortly after,

but I was glad that she got off her abusive relationship and that she was safe. But when my ex-wife found out about the affair, things expectedly didn't go well. She lashed out and said a lot of horrible things about me to our daughter, who was 15 at the time. I admitted full fault with the affair, but even after the divorce, I sensed that the distance between me and my daughter was growing,

until one day, my daughter said she wasn't going to speak with me anymore, and she was going to cut me off from her life forever. That was the most painful thing anyone had ever said to me. I begged her to please reconsider. I still remember that day. But time passed on. My daughter kept her word, and after trying to connect with her for the first year, I gave up. I found out from one of my mutual friends that my ex-wife married a great guy. I was happy because, because I was hoping that would remove the hatred from my ex-wife and my ex-wife would advise our daughter to at least rekindle a relationship with me. But that never happened. I moved states a year later. I am at peace now, but still have some aching sadness. I have retired. Both my parents have passed away, my brother passed away tragically a couple of years ago. To be honest, I am

waiting for my turn. I have only my dog and my sister left. A couple of hours ago, my daughter called me on my phone. I haven't spoken to her in 17 years. I instantly recognized her voice, but I didn't feel anything. No happiness, no sadness, just indifference. She was crying a lot on the call, and we caught up on life. She's married, and she has a daughter who's now 12. She apologized for cutting off contact, and she says her mom asked her to reconnect with me, as her mom felt guilty about how everything played out. She said she really wanted me to meet her daughter, and her daughter was constantly asking about granddaddy. But, I wasn't feeling anything. After we caught up on everything in our life, I told her I don't care about her or her daughter,

and to never contact me again. I then hung up. Was I the ah? Comments of Spouse 1.3.5.comments of Spouse 1.3 Uda I hate when adults make very bad adult decisions that affect their children and then blame the children when they respond in a very childlike manner. Your daughter was a teenager. That is a rough time for kids even when their home life is stable. You gave her one whole year before you cut bait and gave up on her. Then you moved away. You told your daughter that she wasn't important enough to fight for and she believed you. Now that she is an adult with a child of her own, she has reached out to you and you again told her she wasn't important to you.

She now knows she was probably right to cut you out the first time. Captain Cavmae Ann, she has reached out to you and you again told her she wasn't important to you. It sounds like he's been waiting 17 years to hurt her back and he finally got his wish. Congrats on his small, pathetic victory. He's totally O-O-O-Die. Maine Dennis 1974 Ain't nothing like a dead-beat narcissist

claiming to be the one victim in a situation he created for himself. I was helping my company worker G. E.T. out of an Abu's save marriage. Waylord, I helped out a co-worker out of an abusive marriage and didn't even have to sleep with her. Shocking. Top palpitation 4681. Well, it's already been said, but you're the E.T.'s whole. Op okay Hananya, you don't have to be one, though.

A lot of time has passed. At least try to meet her halfway. Surely you owe her that much. Dystopian glitter, I'm confused as to how this is even a question for op. But I guess he doesn't care about anything and is just waiting to die. Alone. How tragic. Update, look, I was extremely drunk last night.

The words which came out of my mouth weren't the best, and my comments on my post weren't great either. Seeing how everyone said I was the a, I decided to call my daughter again an hour ago. I didn't really expect her to pick up the call, but she picked up immediately. I apologized for last night, and she said there was no need to apologize. I then sent her a link to this Reddit post on messages, and told her I know I was the ah, and Thousand said so. She again said I wasn't the awe. She started crying again. I told her she's free to come to my house any time the next four months,

because after that I will be leaving the country with my sister and our dog. Our parents left us a nice farmhouse in their home country, and we will be spending the rest of our lives there. I sent her my address on messages, and my daughter said she'd come with her husband and her daughter by end of next week. She asked if she was welcome to stay there for multiple days, and I told her she could stay for however long she wanted, as our house was spacious enough. Comments, the Dr. 49, just saw the update and good shit, man, I hope things work out for you and don't be hard on yourself.

Life happens and sometimes things are out of our control, but I'm super glad you and your daughter have rekindled your relationship and I hope it all turns out great for you. Maybe you're not on its whole after all. Life's hard sometimes and we all make emotional choices sometimes. Be well up. I hope you enjoy this story. Father called off my 18th celebration in favor of my sibling. However, grandfather came to my rescue, exposed mother's infidelity, and revised his testament. Now, Father is seeking to reconcile, but I wonder if it's genuine. Money?

So two weeks ago, I was about to have my 18th birthday at home, but unfortunately, my horrible younger brother decided that he wanted a weekend away without me and the party ended up getting cancelled. My brother, 15m, is my dad's favorite, if that was not clear enough. And whatever he says in this household, that's what goes. At least there was some balance as long as my mother was alive, but she passed away from lung cancer a couple of years back. Since then, life has been terrible for me because my dad only seems to care about my brother, and he thinks that since I'm older, I can deal with everything on my own. Even on my birthday, I had been planning to go out for the evening with my friends, and obviously, my dad was going to fund all of our plans.

But just a day before my birthday, my brother threw a tantrum and told my dad that he wanted to go away for the weekend because he had been rejected from the football team and he desperately needed something to take his mind off of it. If you ask me, it was not a little bit of the time. It was not surprising that he hadn't been picked for the team because not only is he incredibly brady and annoying, but he's also not a good player. And he has no team spirit, that's obvious. So it shouldn't have been surprising to him that he didn't get picked, but he still had a whole meltdown about it and my dad had to agree. I was shocked because all of that was happening right in front of my eyes and I decided to stand up for myself. I told my dad that I was not going to

stay home while they went away for the weekend, not on my birthday of all days. Because usually, that's what happens whenever my brother decides that he needs some time away from everything. He and my dad go away together for some time off and I get stuck at home. Both of them really enjoy fishing, so they go away on fishing trips and my dad has a friend who has a cabin in the woods, so it's pretty easy for them to just take off. I'm not really a fan of adventure and I'm definitely not a fan of the woods, because I find them creepy. So I'm not like my brother and my dad at all, and in the first few instances that this happened, I volunteered to stay home. After that, though, every time that they needed to go away, they wouldn't even ask me if I had any plans of my own

and I would get stuck dealing with their absence. And this has been a thing ever since my mom passed away. They never used to do this while she was still around. I don't exactly have an issue with staying at home alone, but the problem is that I'm not allowed to have anyone over because my dad thinks that if I have a party and stuff then I'm going to end up trashing the house and he's pretty strict about that kind of thing. One time, I had made the mistake of inviting a couple of friends over and we had been very careful to keep the house clean, but my dad decided to go through the security footage and he found out. I received the lecture of a lifetime the next day and he told me that he did not want me inviting my friends over when the house was empty because he did not

trust us, since we were all young teen boys and that never leads to any good news. So neither could I have friends over and nor could I leave the house and go out on my own because my dad thinks that that's unsafe. And so, I get stuck at home when they're not around. So obviously, I did not want that happening on the day of my birthday. Because then, it would mean that I couldn't have my friends over and neither could I go out with them. It was my 18th birthday for the love of God, it was an important day for me and I wanted to go my way just for once. But my brother couldn't even let me have that and my dad even offered to take me along with them and hire someone to take care of the house for the weekend, but my brother interested

that he wanted to go without me since I had never been to the cabin and I didn't even know anything. So it would be another task to introduce me to everything and he was sure that I wouldn't even enjoy it. Besides, if I was there, he would not be able to take his mind off of what was going on in school since everyone would be wishing me on my birthday and that included some folks from the football team because I'm friends with them. And so, my dad even took back the offer of taking me along, and I got stuck at home. This sort of thing has been happening since my mother passed away. It's always been very obvious to me that my dad has had a favorite, and it's not me and I never even had a problem with it, but that day, I just kind of lost it. I started yelling at my dad and we had a

huge fight because of the way he was acting and had been treating me ever since my mother passed away. He never praised me, even when I achieved something big like winning competitions or doing well in class, but my brother received praise for even the smallest of things. He also behaved very differently with us. He was quite aloof with me and around my brother, he was a different person, he actually acted like a father with him. And I had always put up with it because I knew that my brother was a lot like him. So it was easier for him to connect with my brother, but that was no reason for him to treat me like this. I put my foot down and told him that if he left me home alone on my birthday and did not allow me to bring my friends over or even

go out with them, then I would just do as I pleased and they wouldn't even be able to stop me. But my dad threatened me and said that if I did any of that, then he would cut off my college funds, and I would end up with nothing. I'm supposed to be starting college in a couple of months, so I couldn't risk it because I don't have any money of my own. So with a heavy heart, I had to let them go on the morning of my birthday, and I had to cancel all my plans. My dad did tell me that if I wanted to, I could go out with my friends as soon as they had come back and he would give me the money for having an even bigger party, but that just didn't cut it. Because I wanted to go out with my friends on my birthday and not spend a day at home.

home by myself. So I was really upset the entire day and I cried myself to sleep that night. The next morning, though, I woke up to a surprise because somebody started ringing the doorbell very early in the morning and when I went to check who it was, I realized that it was my grandpa. My dad's parents both passed away when I was little since they were pretty old and my dad is the youngest of four siblings. And he wasn't exactly very close to the rest of his family. So after his parents passed away, we only spoke to and met his family on the holidays. But I used to be really close to my mom's parents and we used to meet pretty frequently when she was alive since they would come over whenever they could. They live out of state, so they would have to fly all the way here to see us but they always told us that it was worth it.

After my mother passed away, though, things changed and it got even worse for my grandpa because eight months after losing my mother, he lost his wife as well. They got into a car crash and my grandma fought for her life for a couple of days before finally succumbing to her injuries and my grandpa ended up losing his legs in the car accident. He's paralyzed from the waist down and has to use a wheelchair to get around. So for the past two years, I've only been able to see him once a year during the holidays and it's been pretty bad because he used to be so full of life. But after losing his wife and daughter, he has become very quiet and sad. Obviously everyone feels terrible for him, but he says that it makes him feel even worse because he doesn't want people pitying him. And so, I try to act like my usual self around him, even though seeing him makes me want to cry because I just missed the person that he used to be. That's part of the reason why I've never told him about my weird relationship with my dad and my brother because I didn't want to make things even tougher for him.

Sharing that with him would only make him feel bad because he wouldn't be able to do anything about it and I'm. I didn't want to make him feel even more helpless. So whenever I visited him in the past two years, I would only stick to the happy stuff. But the day after my birthday, when he showed up at my doorstep with his nurse to surprise me, I ended up breaking down because I was so touched. A lot of people from the family had wished me, but for him to show up all the way here just to surprise me was something that really got to me and knowing that not even my brother and my dad would have done such a thing for me, that's what made me start crying as soon as I saw

him. So, I got pretty emotional and he had to console me for a while before I could thank him and I tried to cover up why I'd started sobbing as soon as I saw him by telling him that I was just touched that he had bothered to fly out here, in spite of his restrictions with the wheelchair and stuff. But I guess he figured out that something had gone terribly wrong and after a while, he started asking me where my dad and my brother were. Initially, I tried to make up excuses for them, but I was honestly exhausted from trying to cover up the fact that they were just terrible to me. So I told him the truth, and he seemed really shocked. And after he had processed it, he started coming off more angry than shocked.

He told me that if I wanted to, I could live with him for the next couple of months until I had to start college. To be honest, that would actually be easier for me because I had decided to go to college out of state because I needed some space away from my dad and my brother. And coincidentally, my college is closer to my grandpa's place than here. So if I stayed with my grandpa, I would only have to drive for a couple of hours to go back home, whereas here, I would have to take a flight back and forth. And it's not like I would be missed here, my dad had my brother and my brother had my dad. So I didn't even have to think twice before I agreed to my grandpa's proposition,

and he told me that we would be leaving as soon as my dad and my brother. had come back home because he had a bone to pick with my father. So he stayed with me that day, and I told him everything that I had been going through for the past couple of years, ever since my mom passed away. It was as if the floodgates had finally opened, and I had somebody to share all of this with. Of course, my friends knew about it, but it's not like they could help and everyone has their own crap to deal with. And I'm not close enough to the rest of my family to be talking to them about this, so it wouldn't have made a difference anyway. When my grandpa asked why I had never told him about any of it, I explained that I did not want him to feel helpless and he told me that he

would have fought for custody, but honestly, it would have been very unlikely that he would get custody of me because it's not like my dad was actively mistreating me or depriving me of anything. But he said that he would have found a way to help me out and that I should have told him earlier. Anyway, I hadn't told him earlier and this is how it was. I had to put up with the situation for a really long time, but this was the last straw for me. And my grandpa, thankfully, was here to finally bail me out. So the day after that, when my dad and brother finally came back home in the morning, they were in for a huge surprise. My grandpa usually treats both me and my brother equally, since he's not my dad, but this time he didn't even bother to greet my brother.

He didn't even wait before confronting my father about what had happened and what he had heard from me. And for the first time in his life, my father actually looked ashamed of himself and it appeared as if he was nervous. I knew for a fact that he had always wanted to impress my grandpa, and even when we would be visiting him after my mother had passed away, he would make quite a show of treating me and my brother well. But I had no idea that he was this scared of my grandpa, and I kind of liked the fact that for the first time, he was answerable to someone because of the way he had treated me. Anyway, after chewing my father out for a couple of minutes, my grandpa told me and my brother to go take a walk because he had to discuss some things with my dad in private

and he didn't want either of us coming back home until he had called us back. It was confusing, but it was obvious that we were not supposed to argue right now, so both of us left the house. My brother and I are not exactly friends, so we went our separate ways and for about 45 minutes, he was at one of his friend's places, and I was at one of mine. When my grandpa finally called us back, he seemed to be in a terrible mood and was very angry. And when I walked in, it was obvious that my dad had been crying because his eyes were all puffy. That was shocking because my dad rarely ever cries and I knew that something must have definitely gone down. Anyway, my grandpa told me to pack my stuff, just the important things, and the rest would be collected later.

So I did what he asked me and about half an hour later, I had a bag ready. Then, we got into a cab and went to the nearest hotel, and there, my grandpa told me that from now on, I would be living with him. It was very convenient, because as I had said, it meant that I would be closer to my college as well. So I didn't exactly have a problem with that, but when I asked him what had happened with my dad, he told me that it was none of my concern right now, and he only wanted me to focus on my future. While I was leaving, I noticed that my dad had not said anything to me, and hadn't even said goodbye.

And my brother didn't even seem to care, so that was that. and two days after I had moved out of my house with my stuff, my grandpa, and I took a flight to his place, and since then, I've been living here. I didn't think that I would hear from my dad or my brother any time soon and I had stopped wondering what had happened between my grandpa and my dad because clearly, my dad had been happy enough to let me go. But that changed two days ago because I received a message from my dad saying that he was sorry about everything and that he didn't realize that I had been feeling neglected. He acknowledged the fact that he had failed as a father and that he hadn't even realized it because he was so busy with my brother, the one child that he had managed to be able to connect with. He said that he had always considered me very different from him and that's why. He had always maintained a distance from me because he didn't think that he would be able to understand me, but with my brother, it was different. And he added that he considered not building a good relationship with me as the biggest mistake of his life.

He had realized that, thanks to my grandfather. I already knew all of that, so it didn't come as a shock to me and honestly, I hadn't even minded the fact that he was more close to my brother than me since I was closer to my mom than to him. What I didn't like was the fact that he had mistreated me and he didn't even realize that he had been treating me badly, but I guess he had come to his senses after I had moved out. He told me that he really wanted to apologize to me and said that he wanted to make things right. He told me that he knew that I had moved in with my grandpa now and that I intended to stay with him until college was over. But he would really want me to come back home to him, so we could talk it out and work this out. That's what my mother would have wanted, according to him. And I think I agree, that is probably what my mother would have wanted because when she was around,

she was always pushing my dad and I to spend some more time together, but we never listened to her. However, I don't want to commit to anything right now and so, I haven't replied to my dad's message. If I'm being honest, I'm not even sure if I want to repair my relationship with them right now or not. I haven't even started college yet, but there are only a couple of weeks before I do. And even when I do, I only plan on coming back to my grandpa's place on alternate weekends, so that would be more convenient than moving back home. Besides, it's not just about the convenience, but it's also about the relationship that I have with my grandpa and I don't have that with my dad or my brother.

So it's not like I feel obliged to go back home with them to try and fix things, but then again, if he's trying, then shouldn't I? I've just been having a lot of mixed feelings about what my dad said, and I don't know what to do about this situation. Wibta, if I told my father that I did not want to move back in with him and that I wanted to stay with my grandpa. Edit, I honestly don't know why my dad would want me to stay back home whenever he and my brother would go on their fishing trips. He used to tell me that it was unsafe for us to leave the house completely empty, and even when we would take family trips when my mother was around,

he would hire someone to look after the house. It's just a thing with my dad, I guess. As for whether I'm actually my dad's biological son or not, I don't know how to answer that. I mean, I've heard of people treating their adoptive kids badly in comparison to their biological children, so I wouldn't be surprised if I'm not actually his son. But nobody has ever said anything to indicate that I'm not and neither do I have any paternity tests to prove anything. So as far as I'm concerned, I definitely am his son. And if you ask me, I don't even think it matters if I'm his biological son or not because

he has been the one who raised me with my mother. biological or not, I'm his son in some way and he should have respected that and treated me just like he treated my brother. Anyway, that's not the point right now and to answer the questions that you guys had for me, I don't know if he's my actual biological father or not. If I find out, I'll let you guys know. Update 1, so after a lot of deliberation, I decided to ask my grandpa whether I'm actually my dad's biological son or not. I couldn't stop thinking about it after a bunch of people in the comments suggested that maybe he was treating me differently because I wasn't actually his son. And there was also the comment that my grandpa had made about trying to get custody of me if I had told him about the way my father had been treating me earlier. I started thinking that he wouldn't have said that if he didn't have reason to believe that he would have been able to get custody of me.

So I felt like I just had to ask him and I had to work up a lot of courage, but eventually I felt like I deserved to know the truth. And last evening I sat down with him and I just blurted out the question without thinking much and it took him by surprise. But then he told me that he knew that was going to happen at some point. And even though my mother had always tried to keep it a secret for me, I'm old enough to know now. And as it turns out, I am definitely my dad's biological son. And we know that for a fact, because several paternity tests have been conducted to confirm it. Apparently it's not my paternity that is the problem, but the incident that took place before my birth that probably made my father resent me.

My dad had been neglecting my mother because of his work before I was born and they had only been married for two years at the time and together for four. She always regretted this, but my mother ended up having an affair with one of her friends, and my dad found out about it. She ended the affair and they agreed to get couples counseling, but a couple of weeks later, she found out that she was pregnant. The only problem was that she had no idea whose baby it actually was going to be. My dad wanted to terminate the pregnancy altogether, but my mother was not on board with that. So they had to wait for the pregnancy to get to a stage where they could conduct a paternity test.

And until then, my mother's affair partner was very much a part of the whole process because it could have been his kid as well. and if it was, my mother said that she didn't want to be unfair to her future kid. And it said that all three of them would have to raise me together. My dad obviously was not on board with that idea and insisted that only he and my mother should have custody of the baby, no matter who the actual biological father was. But my mother wanted to be fair. And so they ended up fighting about this a lot. They decided to stay together because they actually did love each other.

And that ended up turning out to be pretty bad for me because even though I was my dad's son, and after they found out about it, my mother cut all ties with her affair partner, it still didn't seem to be enough for my father. After I was born, a couple of more tests were conducted to make sure that I was absolutely and 100% my dad's biological child. And I was, it had been proven, but in spite of that, my dad continued to pick fights with my mother until she threatened to walk out with me. Now, obviously, I'm not saying that my mother was right. She definitely shouldn't have cheated on my dad and should have tried to talk it out with him before going out of her way to look for love outside of marriage. But if my dad had given her a second chance, he should have actually tried to make it work instead of constantly picking fights with her.

And I think he's a really confused man because even though he decided to stay with my mother and make it work with her, in spite of her cheating, I guess he couldn't handle that and decided that he was going to take out all his anger and frustration on me. And the fact that I was nothing like him when it came to my personality, that probably just irritated him even more. And that's how we came to this situation, where he really resented me for no fault of my own. When my mother was alive, he seemed to get along well enough with her, so I never would have been able to guess that they had problems like this in the past. But I guess it makes sense when you consider the fact that he had me to resent, so he didn't need to

take out any of his anger on my mother anymore. Anyway, that's one part of the story and the reason why my dad seems to feel so guilty about having treated me badly in the past is because my grandpa told him that he was going to cut him out of the inheritance. My dad's own inheritance had to be divided into four parts, because of his siblings, so he didn't really receive a lot back then. But after my mother had passed away, my grandpa had apparently changed his will to leave everything that he had to my dad and his grandkids.

however after my grandpa had found out about the way that i was being treated by my father he had had a discussion with him and really chewed him out he had told my father that he was really sorry about the fact that his daughter had cheated on him but that was no reason for him to still hold that against me since none of it was my fault i hadn't even been born when it happened and even though it was nothing like my dad i was still his biological child and that had been proven by several paternity tests some which he had even conducted independently without my dad i was still his biological child and that had been proven by several paternity tests some which he had even conducted independently without my mom's knowledge, so that my mother couldn't have interfered with the results. So he really had no reason to behave the way he did with me and yet, one day he had just decided that he was not going to treat me like his son and punish me for what my mom had done. That was not acceptable, and my grandpa had told him that after he had learned the way I was being treated, he could no longer allow him to expect anything from him. And now, whatever share of the inheritance that my dad was going to receive, that would be going to me

instead. My dad had been crying about that and also because he felt like he was going to lose everything in one go. So when I asked my grandpa whether my dad was reaching out to me for the inheritance because if he's actually sorry, my grandpa told me that he genuinely doesn't have any idea and that he has told me he knows, but he can't help me out here. For what it's worth, my grandpa told me that my dad genuinely seemed upset but I still don't know whether he has any ulterior motives or not, and it is very hard to trust him after everything that has happened. So I guess I'm going to continue to not respond to my father until I'm sure. Update 2 so I'm in college right now, I started a couple of weeks back and it's been great so far.

I forgot to update you guys on what happened with my dad because to be honest, nothing really happened. After that message that he sent, I did not respond to him, and he did not bother to reach out to me again, so I guess he was only reaching out to me for the inheritance because if he had genuinely felt bad about everything, he definitely would have made another attempt to reach out to me. And now, it's been almost four months since we last spoke, so I don't think he's going to be trying to contact me anytime soon. As for my brother, we were never really close when we were living together and now, we have absolutely no contact. And I'm definitely more than fine with it. The only person for my family that I'm still in touch with is my grandpa and we speak every other day on the phone. I was a bit mad at him for hiding these things from me, but then again, he was only trying to do right by his family.

I don't think I would have been able to handle the truth earlier anyway, so good call on his part for not telling me earlier. At least I'm an adult now and I can process this, but if I had learned about my mother's infidelity before, I don't know how I would have reacted. Knowing about her past has definitely changed my perception of her but not in a way that I hate her now. It's just that I realized that she was a flawed person and not the perfect mother that I idolized. But it's fine, I'm always going to love her because no matter what she has done, she is still my mother. Anyway, that was it, I guess. Update 3, hi. So nothing much to add, I'm still no contact with my family.

but I'm graduating in a couple of weeks and I guess somehow, my father found out. He sent me an email congratulating me recently, and I don't know what to make of it. I thought about it for a couple of days, but then I decided not to respond because I'm fine with how things are going right now. I don't want to reestablish contact with him at the moment and when I do, I'll let him know. So that's what I had to post an update about, I guess. I hope you enjoy this story. Partners secretly rendezvoused with an associate outside of the workplace, yet when I came across

invoices for fancy restaurants, I found out that he had misrepresented his marital status and indulged. Currency on her. On her Christmas gift. My 29F. Husband, 30M, and I have been together for eight years and married for just over a year now. We met at a friend's house party back when I was in my early 20s. It wasn't anything special or romantic. He spilled his drink on my shoes, apologized profusely, and we ended up talking for the rest of the

night while my shoes dried by the radiator. After that, we just clicked. He asked for my number and the rest is history. Things were actually pretty good between us, or at least I thought they were. He's always been working at the same company since he graduated from college. Some firm that pays well but works him pretty hard. In all our time together, I've almost never heard him talk. about any of his coworkers because he's not really that kind of guy who tries to make connections with people. He's very introverted and likes to be in his bubble. The first few years we were dating, I'd ask him about his coworkers and he'd just shrug and say they're fine or nothing interesting to report. The thing is, he doesn't realize how easy he is to approach and talk to.

I've been with him for eight years, so I know this about him. He's very calm, funny and quirky in his own way, which draws people to him even if he's if he doesn't see it. He has this dry sense of humor that catches you off guard. People like talking to him, but he's never been the one to seek out those interactions. We've had a pretty normal routine for years. We both work during the week, sometimes have friends over on weekends, mostly my friends TBH, and generally just exist together. He's never been the type to go out much without me, which I guess I got used to. Our typical weekend used to be sleeping in, making a big breakfast together, maybe catching a movie or doing some house projects, then ordering takeout and watching whatever

show we were into at the time. Things started changing around six months into our marriage. He started staying late at work more often. Then he said there were some big projects coming up. I didn't think much of it because his company does tend to get busy in cycles. Then he started being on his phone more, which was unusual for him. He's never been a big texter or social media person. These past few months my husband has been mentioning this poor girl at work.

I remember he told me a lot of bullshit happened to her this year, and that's why he's trying to uplift her. This seemed weird to me immediately because my husband does not usually do that. He doesn't usually give a fuck about anyone at work. Like, at all. I've seen him completely forget co-workers' names even after working with them for years. At first, it was just him mentioning her in passing. This girl at work had her car breakdown today or that new girl got dumped by her boyfriend

this weekend kind of stuff. I didn't think much of it because he's always been a decent person who notices when people are struggling, even if he doesn't usually get involved. But the frequency was unusual. He's never cared this much about a co-worker's personal life before. Then I noticed he started texting during dinner. He's always been strict about no phones at the table. It was actually one of his pet peeves.

When I called him out on it, he said it was work stuff and put the phone away. But the next night it happened again. And again. Then one Friday, he asked me if I'm cool with him bringing this girl to a bar. Just completely out of nowhere. We were folding laundry together, something we always do on Friday nights, and he just tossed it out there like it was nothing. So, is it cool if I take Sarah out for drinks tomorrow? She's really going through it right now.

I asked if I could come along and he said that he doesn't really want to stir up awkwardness between me and her, especially since he's trying to comfort her after she had this recent breakup. Comfort her? Since when does my husband comfort anyone, let alone a female co-worker? This is the same guy who once told his own brother to walk it off when he broke up with his girlfriend of three years. He showed me her picture when I pressed him on it.

She's obviously young and very pretty. I'm not trying to be that insecure wife, but to be a child. Come on. She looks like she could be a model or something. Perfect skin, long dark hair, the kind of effortless beauty that makes you feel like a troll in comparison. I immediately felt this pit in my stomach. I tried to play it cool. Sure, whatever, help your friend, I said. But inside I was screaming. Something felt off, but I didn't want to be that controlling wife who freaks out every time her husband talks to another woman. So I let it go that first time. He went out with her that Saturday, came home around midnight smelling like beer, and passed out without telling me

anything about their night. Sunday morning, I casually asked how it went. Fine, he said, not looking up from his phone. She's going through a lot. And that was it. No details, no stories, nothing. this from the guy who normally gives me a play-by-play of his lunch order. I've read their conversations and it hurts sometimes that my husband always initiates the conversation. Always. He never does that with anyone else. Not even me anymore. I used to get random texts from him during the day, jokes he thought I'd like or questions about dinner plans or just a simple miss you. Those have all but stopped. In their texts, he's constantly checking on her. How are you feeling today? Did you try that meditation app one suggested?

Wanna grab lunch? My treat. It's like he's auditioning for the role of her fucking life coach. They started going out every Saturday. At first, it was just drinks to help her through her breakup. Then it turned into dinner and drinks. Then whole day excursions. One Saturday he said they were going hiking because she needed to clear her head. Since when does my house? husband hike. We went once three years ago and he complained the entire time about the bugs. I told him I'm starting to feel uncomfortable with this friendship. We were getting ready for bed and I tried to keep my voice casual. Don't you think you're spending a lot of time with Sarah? People at work might start talking. He said that there's nothing to worry about and that

he's just helping her out. He described it as like a female-female friendship. I don't know what the fuck he's trying to point out with that, but everything between them scares the shit out of me. What does that even mean? That he's gossiping with her? Sharing clothes? What? I asked if I could join them sometime. Just to see what these outings are like. He got this panicked look on his face for just a split second before saying, yeah, maybe sometime. But she's pretty fragile right now and meeting new people is hard for her. Fragile? I'm not new people? I'm not new people I'm his fucking wife.

My husband still lets me read their conversation from time to time, which I guess is supposed to make me feel better. But the fuck, it hurts me that he responds to her faster than he does to me. I'll text him during work hours and get a response three hours later, but the second she texts, he's replying within minutes. I hate how he kept apologizing whenever this girl left him on read. It's like I'm fucking reading how my husband is begging this girl to give him some of her attention and time, and I can't take it anymore.

Sorry if I'm bothering you. No worries if you're busy. Just checking in, ignore this if you're swamped. Who is this desperate person and what has he done with my husband? One time he was in the shower and his phone kept buzzing. I checked and it was her sending him memes or something. Nothing inappropriate, but the frequency was ridiculous. like seven messages in a row. When he got out of the shower, he immediately grabbed his phone

and started laughing and texting back. He didn't even acknowledge I was in the room. I've started noticing other changes too. He's buying new clothes, but different from his usual style. Slightly more fitted shirts. A new cologne. He never cared about that stuff before. He's also started going to the gym, which would be fine, healthy even, if it wasn't so clearly tied to when all this started. I don't know how I should approach him because it always ends up with him saying I'm feeling this way for nothing and that there's nothing to worry about. We had a big fight about it last week. I told him point-blank that I think he's developing feelings for this girl. He got defensive immediately. She's just a friend who's going through a hard time, he insisted.

Why are you so threatened by this? Don't you trust me? Making it about my insecurities rather than his behavior. I told him that I want to meet her and he said, for what reason? Like it's fucking weird that I want to meet this person he's spending every Saturday with? He acted like I was suggesting something completely unreasonable. As if meeting your husband's new best friend is some kind of major imposition. I even made dinner plans for us on a Saturday to try to break their routine,

and he just rescheduled our dinner for Friday instead. Didn't even ask if that was okay with me. Just told me we'd go Friday because Saturday was already booked. I've never seen him prioritize anyone else like this. Even his own family takes a backseat to whatever Sarah needs. I asked if she knows he's married, and he got weirdly defensive about it. Of course she knows I'm married. It's not a secret.

But I've never heard him mention me in any of those texts I've seen, not once. I got my wife and I watched that movie 2 or my wife makes a great pasta sauce or any of the normal ways people reference their spouses in conversation. I don't even think she knows that my husband is married. He never wears his wedding ring to work, claims it gets in the way when he types, and I've never heard him mention me in any of those texts I've seen. One time, he was supposed to come home after work so we could go to my sister's place, but he texted me saying he needed to stay late because this girl was having some crisis. We ended up not going, and my sister was pretty annoyed about it. When I asked him what was so important, he just said she needed someone to talk to and change the subject. My sister later asked me if everything was okay between us because he's been acting different.

I just made up some excuse about work stress. I tried talking to my best friend about this, but she just said I'm overreacting and that man and women can be friends. I know that. I have male friends. but I don't go out drinking alone with them every weekend and text them constantly. I don't buy them expensive gifts or cancel plans with my husband to comfort them. There's friendship and then there's whatever this is.

This morning, I found a receipt in his jacket pocket for a restaurant I've never been to. An expensive one that we've talked about trying for special occasions. I guess it wasn't special enough to take me there. Should I just give him an ultimatum? Tell him it's her or me. Or am I overreacting? I feel like I'm watching my marriage fall apart in slow motion and he's gaslighting me into thinking it's all in my head.

Any advice on how I should handle this? I love him, but I don't know how much more of this I can take. Update, thanks for all the comments, though some of you need to chill with the divorce and immediately stuff. To address some common questions, yes, we've had issues before but nothing major. No, we don't have kids, thankfully, give a little. what's happening. Yes, we've been intimate recently, though less frequently than before. After reading some of your comments and ignoring the really mean ones, I decided to approach my husband

again. I spent all day rehearsing what I wanted to say. I wanted to be calm and rational. I wanted to express my feelings without accusing him of anything. I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt while still standing up for myself. That all went out the window when he came home late again, last night without texting to let me know. He just walked in at 8.30 when he's usually home by six, didn't apologize or explain, and went straight to the fridge like nothing was wrong. I told him that I want him to stop seeing this girl every Saturday unless he brings me along. He told me that I'm not making any sense and asked why I'm making such a big deal about it. He said he could just bring me if it was that important, but his tone made it clear he thought

I was being ridiculous. The way he looked at me was like I was some crazy person demanding he stopped breathing air. I again asked him directly if this girl knew he's married, and based on his reaction, I knew immediately that she doesn't. He actually said, why would I brush the fact I'm married in her face? Brush IT in her face? Like mentioning you have a wife of eight years is some kind of rude imposition. I called him several names I probably shouldn't repeat here, and he got so upset. In the heat of the moment, I took his phone and went through every single app.

He tried to grab it back, but I locked myself in the bathroom. He was pounding on the door yelling at me to respect his privacy, but all I could think was that married people shouldn't need this much privacy from each other. He's been messaging her constantly, way more than I realized.

Pictures of random things that reminded him of her. He sent her a fucking poem once. My husband, who got me a pre-written card for our anniversary, wrote this girl a poem. I found out he gave her a very expensive gift worth almost $1,000. A fucking thousand dollars. I was beyond pissed about it. For context, we have both joint and personal accounts, and he used his personal money for this, but still. He spent more on her Christmas gift than he did on mine.

It was a pair of designer earrings that she had apparently mentioned liking once. Meanwhile, I got a kitchen appliance that I'd specifically said I didn't want because it felt too housewify. A lot of things happened after my original post that my brain couldn't process everything. We had this huge screaming match where I threatened to tell this girl that I'm his wife and that she's being a homewacker. He said he would never forgive me if I ruined this one and only friendship he had. One and only friendship.

We've been together eight years and he's acting like this girl he's known for a few months is the only person who understands him. Then he dropped the bomb. He said that he doesn't feel the love ever since we got married. He said he's never been this happy, excited, and contented with anyone before. Those words felt like actual physical pain. It was like being stabbed while simultaneously falling from a great height. I couldn't breathe. Then he started listing all these things about our relationship that apparently bother him. Things he's never mentioned before. Said I don't challenge him intellectually whatever the fuck that means. Said I've become complacent in our relationship.

Said he feels stifled by my expectations. Where is all this coming from? If he felt this way, why didn't he say something months or years ago? Why wait until he's formed this intense bond with someone else to suddenly decide our marriage isn't intellectually stimulating enough? He slept in the guest room that night. I didn't sleep at all. I just laid in our bed staring at the ceiling trying to figure out when everything went wrong. Was it something I did?

Something I didn't do? Is there any way to fix this or is it already too broken? After he left for work the next day, I ended up messaging the girl. I found her on his Instagram and just sent her a simple hi, I'm husband's name's wife. We need to talk. She replied almost immediately and seemed genuinely shocked. She said that she didn't know he was married and was very apologetic about it. She sent screenshots of their conversations where he explicitly told her he was single.

Single. Not separated, not in an open marriage, not going through a divorce. Fucking single. There were messages where he talked about future plans with her. Weekend trips they could take. He said he wanted to bring her to the kind of apartment they could get together someday. He was so mad when he found out I messaged her. He came home early from work, which was ironic considering how little time he's been spending

at home lately. His face was red and he was shaking. He left the house and wouldn't answer his phone. I started panicking and actually messaged the girl again to ask if she was with him. She said no, that she just got out of a bad breakup and didn't want to be involved in any more drama. She seemed sincerely sorry and said if she had known he was. was married. She wouldn't have gone out with him at all. I found out she just started working at his company three months ago. Three months. And he's acting like they have this deep connection that I

couldn't possibly understand. She's 24, five years younger than me. Not drastically younger, but young enough that they're in different life stages. She's still going out clubbing with friends while I'm thinking about retirement plans and maybe starting a family someday. I have so many questions swirling in my mind right now. How could he lie so blatantly to both of us? Has he been physically cheating or just emotionally? Why did he start pulling away right after we got married? Why didn't he just talk to me if he was unhappy? I've been sitting in our empty house for hours just staring at the wall trying to make sense of everything. All our photos are still up. Us hiking in the mountains on our third date. Us at his brother's wedding. Our own wedding.

Were we ever really happy or was I just seeing what I wanted to see? He turned his phone off completely and I have no idea where he is. His best friend hasn't heard from him either. Yes, I called him, so much for one and only friendship. His parents called me asking why he missed their weekly Sunday call and I didn't know what to tell them. I just said we had a fight and he went out to clear his head. I couldn't bring myself to tell them what's really happening. They've always been so kind to me.

I don't know what happens next. I don't know if he's coming back. Update 2. I wasn't going to update again, but so many people have messaged me asking what happened that I figured I should. Also, writing this out helps me process everything. Even if no one reads it. First, thanks for all the supportive comments. To those saying I invaded his privacy by taking his phone.

Maybe you're right, but when someone's acting as suspicious as he was, sometimes you need to know the truth. And I was right to be suspicious. To the person who suggested I slash his tires. Thanks but no thanks, I'm upset but not looking to commit crimes. I haven't told any of my family and friends about what's going on. I feel embarrassed, ugly, and pathetic right now. The last thing I want to see on their faces is pity. I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me.

My sister knows something is wrong because I've been avoiding her calls, but I just can't bring myself to tell her what's happening. He was gone for almost 24 hours. No calls, no texts, nothing. I was actually about to file a missing person report when he finally texted saying he was okay and would be home soon. I don't know where he went or who he was with. Part of me doesn't want to know.

My husband came back around 3 a.m. that night. He smelled like alcohol but wasn't completely wasted. We sat at the kitchen table and had probably the most painful conversation of my life. He said he could no longer see me in his future ever since we got married. The reason he's been working late so often was that he doesn't want to be around me. I asked him why he waited to tell me this since we've been married. He said he thought his feelings would come back eventually, that it was just a phase, and there was no way his love for me would be gone overnight. But every day felt worse for him.

He said he wakes up next to me and feels nothing. Nothing. After eight years together. He said he tried to make it work, tried to reignite the spark, but it just wasn't happening. He admitted that meeting Sarah accelerated things, but insisted that our problems existed before her,

that she just made him realize what he was missing. He said being around her made him feel alive, again in a way he hasn't felt in years. He doesn't want me anymore and thinks it's totally over. Then he had the audacity to suggest we could even be friends. I felt the ultimate betrayal. Nothing in our relationship prepared me for this. Before we got married, he used to leave me little notes around the house. He planned this elaborate proposal at the place we had our first date. I asked him if there was anything specific that changed after we got married. He shrugged, and said he just felt trapped. That our relationship was exciting when we were dating, but once

we made it official, all the magic disappeared. I asked if he ever truly loved me, and he said he did, but love changes. What kind of bullshit is that? I told him that we could go for couple counseling and work it out. I begged him to at least try. If he loved me once, maybe he could love me again. He actually cried, saying he doesn't want to be stuck anymore. It's not about his coworker anymore, according to him. It's about what he feels in our relationship. He cried and asked for a divorce while I'm crying and begging him not to leave. I'm so confused and don't know what to do.

I felt like I was a good partner. I supported his career. I tried to make our home nice. I was there through the death of his grandmother last year. I helped him study for certification. he needed for work. I thought we were happy. We talked about having kids someday, buying a house in the suburbs, growing old together. Was it all just talk? I finally asked him directly about his coworker and if they ever had sex. He said that he genuinely cares and likes her and he's getting

to know her more but claims she doesn't see him that way. He swears nothing physical happened between them. Part of me believes this, the texts I saw were emotional but not sexual. But does it even matter? The emotional betrayal hurts just as much. I asked about the money he spent on her, and he said it was just a Christmas gift. A $1,000 just a Christmas gift for someone he's known for three months. When I pointed out how inappropriate that was, he got defensive and said I was making it into something it's not. He said she was going through financial difficulties and he was just being a good friend. A good friend who told her he was single and available. The worst part is that I still love him. After everything, I still want to fix things. How pathetic is that? He's been

sleeping in the guest room for the past few days. Sometimes I hear him on the phone late at night, speaking quietly, and I know who he's talking to. I pretend I don't hear. I don't hear. I don't hear. I'm but every word is like a knife in my heart. We're existing in this awful limbo where we're still living in the same house but barely speaking. I cook meals for one now. He does his own laundry. We coordinate bathroom schedules to avoid each other. It's like living with a ghost. He mentions splitting our assets and moving out by the end of the month. I can't afford our place on my own, so I'll probably have to move back in with my parents temporarily. Just thinking about having to tell them what happened makes me want to throw up. My mom loved him. She's always telling her friends

what a wonderful son-in-law she has. How do I tell her that he lied to me for months and wants to throw away our marriage for someone he barely knows? I've started looking into divorce lawyers, which is something I never thought I'd be doing at 29. The legal websites are overwhelming. Everything costs so much money. I don't even know where to start. We don't own property together. but we have joint accounts and shared debts. What happens to all of that? My appetite is gone completely. I've lost weight, which some people might think is a good thing, but not like this.

I go to work on autopilot, smile at my co-workers like nothing is wrong, come home to this broken shell of a home and repeat. I am in so much pain that I feel numb. I can't believe this is happening to me. Every song on the radio makes me cry. Every couple I see on the street makes me wonder what they have that we didn't. Every wedding ring commercial makes me change the channel. The future I thought I had is just, gone.

I guess I'll be heading into the new year as a fucking divorced almost 30-year-old. Not exactly where I thought I'd be. If anyone has gone through something similar, how did you get through it? Did divorce proceedings destroy you financially? How long did it take before you could go a day without crying? I'm not even sure what I'm asking for anymore. I just feel so alone. I hope you enjoy this story.

Sibling concealed her murky history and modest origins to wed a wealthy man, then requested my assistance in serving beverages at her nuptials, so I exposed the reality and sabotage her. Marriage to his wealthy family. Earlier this year, my younger sister, Bonnie, made the big announcement that she was getting married. Of course, we were all three. for her. She was marrying one of her co-workers, a guy named Matt. From the moment we first

met Matt, it was clear he was a decent, friendly guy, and he seemed to genuinely care for my sister. However, Matt wasn't just any regular guy he came from old money. His family, as Bonnie had told us, had generational wealth. They were the kind of people who had inherited fortunes passed down from one generation to the next, the type of family where money wasn't just about luxury, but also about legacy and status. Everything about him and his background was worlds apart from our own experiences. His family had never known the kind of financial struggles we faced on a daily basis. For context, our family's financial situation had never been stable.

In fact, we were the complete opposite of Matt's wealthy background. Our dad left us when we were just kids, and it was tough. Our mom was a single parent, raising both me and my sister-boggling. Bonnie on her own. She worked long, grueling hours just to keep a roof over our heads and make sure we had the basics to survive. From a young age, we became all too familiar with hardship. Money was tight sometimes painfully so and we learned how to live with very little. There were many nights where we went to bed hungry because there simply wasn't enough money for groceries. We didn't even own a car, so my mom had to rely on public transportation to get to work every day.

The bus rides were long, and after working long shifts, she'd come home exhausted. Still, she never let that stop her from doing everything she could for us. She'd come through the door with tired eyes, but she never complained. It wasn't until I was in high school that things started to slowly improve for us. My mom finally managed to get a better job, one that paid a bit more and made it a little easier for her to support us. By then, though, we had accumulated so much debt from years of business. barely scraping by that it took her a long, long time to climb out of that hole. She worked

tirelessly to pay off what we owed. Even as our situation improved, it still felt like we were always one step behind. When I graduated high school, my mom didn't have the money to send me to college. As much as she wanted to, she simply couldn't afford it. Thankfully, I had worked hard and secured a scholarship that made it possible for me to leave our small town and head to the big city for college. It was a huge relief not just for me, but for my mom too. I knew how much she had worried about my future, and getting that scholarship felt like a way to finally ease some of her burden. Leaving home for college was bittersweet, though. I was excited for the opportunities that lay ahead, but I couldn't shake the feeling of guilt about leaving Bonnie and my mom behind.

Bonnie missed me a lot when I left, and I missed her too. We'd always been close, and it was hard to be apart from her. She used to call me often when I was in college, eager to hear about my experiences. Bonnie was fascinated by my stories whether it was about classes, dorm life, or the social scene. Every time we spoke, she would tell me how badly she wanted to be in college too, constantly expressing how she couldn't wait to break free from the constraints of home. She longed for that independence and the excitement that she imagined college life would bring. Years past, and eventually, the time came for Bonnie to go to college herself. Fortunately, by that point, my mom had managed to put aside some money for her education. This financial support helped Bonnie get admitted to a college,

but it wasn't enough to cover all her expenses. Unlike me, she wasn't able to secure a scholarship, which meant that she still had to take on a part-time job to help pay for her future tuition fees and other college-related costs. By this time, I had already started working, so I began sending money home each month, making sure to contribute both to my mom and to Bonnie. I saved every bit I could from my paycheck, cutting back on my own expenses so I could support them. It wasn't always easy, but it was important to me to ensure that Bonnie had the chance to pursue her education without feeling completely overwhelmed by financial burdens. However, once Bonnie got to college, she completely changed. It was the first time in her life that she was away from home,

away from all the responsibilities. Suddenly, she had complete freedom, and she embraced it perhaps a little too much. Bonnie began to explore a different side of life, one that involved partying, alcohol, and drugs. She also began to realize the influence she could have as a young woman. Bonnie could flirt her way into almost anything, from getting free drinks at bars to gaining attention wherever she went.

It wasn't long before her life became a whirlwind of relationships, she was always either in a relationship or moving on to the next guy. Each breakup would lead to another new fling, and it seemed like she was caught up in a cycle of excitement, heartbreak, and the rush of something new. The trouble really began when Bonnie got herself into a serious situation at one of her rich friends' parties. Everyone there was using drugs when someone called on the police complaining about the loud

music. A lot of her friends slipped out, but Bonnie wasn't so lucky. She was too drunk to run and was caught by the police along with three other people. Fortunately, she hadn't actually used any drugs that night, which worked in her favor. Because this was her first offense, she ended up spending the weekend in jail and was later released after being assigned community service. My mom was furious. She couldn't believe Bonnie had gotten herself into such a situation, and gave her a stern talk

which fell on deafseer. I felt equally concerned, if not more. This wasn't the Bonnie I grew up with, and I felt a strong sense of responsibility as her older sibling to help guide her. So I tried to console her, hoping to make her see that this kind of behavior was dangerous and wasn't doing her any good for her future. But Bonnie got irritated and dismissed me, telling me to mind my own business and that she was just having fun during her college days.

It was clear that Bonnie just wasn't ready to listen to any of us. As the months passed, things only seemed to get worse. Bonnie became more and more entangled with the wrong crowd. She would regularly use drugs or smoke we'd like it was nothing. After she graduated college, she had no prospects of a proper job so she started living together with some of her friends in a cheap apartment while working as a server. I did my best to encourage her to look for better jobs but she had absolutely no ambitions. I had no choice but to keep sending her rent money to help her out every month.

One night I received a frantic phone call from Bonnie. She was crying, completely delirious, and I could tell from her voice that something was seriously wrong. Through her sobs, she told me that she was high on drugs and had somehow gotten separated from her group of friends. She was stranded, alone in the middle of nowhere, and had no idea where she was. At that moment, I felt a wave of terror wash over me. My mind raced with worry, imagining all the worst possible scenarios.

I told her to send me her location, and without wasting any time, I got in my car and started driving. It took hours, driving through the middle of the night, to find her. When I finally spotted her, she was near a small petrol pump, sitting on the ground, looking worn out like a homeless person. Her clothes looked dirty and she smelled terrible. She confessed how she and her friends regularly drove into the woods. to try out drugs just for some fun.

I shook my head in disappointment. Although I was relieved beyond words to have found her alive and unharmed, the fear of what could have happened lingered heavily in my mind. So, I told her that enough was enough and that she needed to check herself into rehab. Off course, Bonnie immediately refused,

brushing off the severity of her situation, claiming her drug habits weren't that bad and insisting that she could handle herself. I reminded her that our mom was getting older, and that I couldn't just drop everything every time she called me in a crisis. I loved her, but there were limits to how much I could physically or emotionally handle. I threatened that I would stop sending her money every month, and without it, she'd have no choice but to move back in with Mom since she wouldn't be able to afford rent. In the end, much to my relief,

Bonnie finally agreed to go to rehab. Mom and I were happy to see that she was finally going to try to change herself and this could be a fresh start for her. But of course, it wasn't simple. Rehab was tough for Bonnie. She hated every second of it. There were days when she would call, angry and frustrated, wanting to quit and insisting that she didn't belong there. She resented us for making her go through it, but after a few days, she started to calm down and adjust. A month after Bonnie was released from rehab, I could see a noticeable change in her. She looked healthier, more vibrant, and for the first time in a long while, she resembled the Bonnie I remembered from our childhood. It was like seeing a glimpse of the younger sister I grew up with the one who had dreams,

energy, and a spark that had been dulled by her experiences in recent years. To help her avoid falling back into old habits, I encouraged Bonnie to move in with me instead of going back to live with her old roommates. I knew that returning to the same environment, surrounded by the same people who had been part of her partying and drug use, would make it too easy for her to slip back into that lifestyle. By moving in with me, she could break contact with those influences and focus on building a healthier life. At first, Bonnie wasn't thrilled about the idea of leaving behind her social life, even if it was a toxic one. But after some thought, she agreed to give it a try, and we began living together. Once she moved in, Bonnie continued working at the

cafe like she did. Because I was covering all the expenses for both of us rent, utilities, groceries Bonnie was able to save most of her earnings from the cafe. I didn't mind footing the bill, and just wanted her to focus on staying clean and rebuilding her life. From time to time, I encouraged Bonnie to think about finding a more stable, long-term job. I knew that working at the cafe wasn't a forever solution, and I thought a corporate job might give her more financial security. But Bonnie always pushed back against the idea. She would tell me how much she hated the thought of working in a corporate environment, how it didn't suit her at all. In fact, she often expressed pity for me, saying she felt sad that I was part of what she called the rat race.

Bonnie would also tell me how she planned on marrying Rich anyways so she wasn't really worried about her future. Lucky for her, it was during this period of her life that Bonnie met Matt. She was working while he came into the cafe for a cup of coffee. They struck up a casual conversation, and from there, things just clicked. What started as a friendly chat grew into a budding relationship. At the time, Bonnie had no idea about Matt's background, especially that he came from old money. He hadn't mentioned it, and in many ways, he seemed pretty down to earth. However, Bonnie has a sharp eye and told me after their very first meeting that she had a hunch that he was wealthy based on the brands of his clothes and shoes. Bonnie and Matt hit it off after a few dates.

One thing I noticed early on, though, was that she never invited him inside after their dates. Whenever Matt would drop her off after a date, she always made sure he left her at the curb just outside my house. Out of curiosity, I brought it up with her a couple of times, casually mentioning that if she wanted to, she could invite him in. I wasn't trying to pry, but I wanted her to know that she could treat my place like her own. But Bonnie always brushed it off.

She'd refuse, saying that it wasn't. necessary, and that she just preferred to keep things separate. One evening, as I was coming home from work, I noticed Bonnie and Matt standing outside our place, clearly having just returned from one of their dates. They were chatting quietly, but as soon as Bonnie spotted me, she gave me this awkward, almost uncomfortable smile. At first, I thought maybe she was just feeling a bit shy about introducing Matt to me, which seemed odd, but I brushed it off. Matt looked polite and well-mannered as he turned to look at me. He smiled and extended his hand, and I introduced myself, shaking his hand in return. Trying to be friendly, I invited Matt upstairs for a cup of coffee, figuring it was a

good opportunity to get to know him a little better. But Bonnie immediately looked embarrassed, almost panicked. She started declining the offer on his behalf, saying it was getting late and that he should probably head home. Matt seemed interested, though, like he wouldn't have minded coming up, but Bonnie kept insisting it wasn't a good time. I didn't want to push the issue, so I wished them both good night and walked upstairs, still thinking it was strange how determined Bonnie was to avoid having him come inside. Later that night, when Bonnie and I were alone, I asked her directly why she was so adamant about not inviting Matt in. Red-faced, she finally admitted that she didn't want Matt to see how poor we were. I was stunned. I stood there, staring at her, trying to make

sense of what she was saying. We lived in a decent neighborhood. I had a decent salary which supported both of our lifestyles and had worked hard for everything I owned. My place was cozy, comfortable, clean, and well kept. I looked around, gesturing to the apartment, and asked Bonnie what she could possibly be talking about. In my eyes, we had everything we needed. But she just shook her head, exasperated, and told me I wouldn't understand. According to her, I had no idea how rich people lived. She argued that she had been around wealthy friends before, and the way they lived was completely different from how we lived.

Their houses, their lifestyles, their luxuries it was on a whole other level, she said. She said she didn't want Matt to see our place and get scared off by the reality of her life. She insisted that Matt was her ticket out of this house and she didn't want to jeopardize anything. I was taken aback, not just by her words, but by how casually she was. she had admitted to using Matt just for his money. I tried to explain that this was wrong of her and that if she really saw a future with Matt, she needed to be honest and upfront to him about who she was, about our life. It wasn't healthy to hide things from someone she cared about. But Bonnie wouldn't hear it. To her, it was all about appearances, and in her mind, she needed

a way to escape this way of living. Months later, Bonnie finally decided to introduce Matt to me and my mom, only because Matt had been asking her for months to meet her family and she couldn't put it off any longer. From the beginning, she insisted that we be on our best behavior while meeting Matt and that we have to give off a certain image one that wouldn't reveal any hint of the financial struggles we had experienced growing up. Bonnie made it clear that this dinner had to take place at one of the best restaurants in the city, the kind of place where you had to make reservations well in advance and the prices were so high, I couldn't even imagine spending that kind of money on a meal. I tried to reason with her, suggesting that maybe we could go somewhere more modest. But Bonnie wouldn't hear it.

She insisted that we needed to do this for her, to present ourselves as capable, refined, and anything but poor. She also emphasized strictly that I, being the oldest, should pay for the bill for our meals, even though she knew it was well beyond my budget. Thankfully, our mom, seeing how much this meant to Bonnie, quietly gave me some money to help out with the bill later. The dinner itself went quite well. Matt, as always, was polite and charming. He didn't give off any airs of superiority or entitlement, which made me wonder even more why Bonnie was so concerned about impressing him. At one point, when the check came, Matt graciously offered to pay for the meal. But before I could even consider letting him cover it, Bonnie laughed and quickly jumped in,

refusing his offer. She made a point of telling him that we were more than capable of handling the bill ourselves, and she absolutely wouldn't let him pay. It was clear she was trying to maintain the illusion that we weren't struggling at all, that we were just as well off as he was. Bonnie's plan worked. Matt left that evening none the wiser, fully convinced by the image Bonnie had worked so hard to create about her family. On one hand, I was relieved that everything had gone smoothly, that Matt hadn't suspected anything. But on the other hand, I was troubled by how far Bonnie was willing to go to keep up appearances. Throughout her relationship with Matt, Bonnie seemed incredibly happy. They traveled the world together, visiting exotic places,

and she even started buying fancy clothes and handbags for herself using his card. When they finally decided to move in together, she gradually began to distance herself from me and would rarely call anymore. I missed my sister. Even though I had been there for her during the hardest times of her life, she barely seemed to care about me now that she could rely on her boyfriend for everything. This year, when Matt proposed to her, Bonnie didn't even call to tell us the happy news. Mom and I found out through social media when she announced it to her followers. Mom tried to reach out to congratulate her, but Bonnie ignored her calls. Weeks later, she finally got back to us and invited us to lunch to discuss her engagement and upcoming wedding. During lunch, Bonnie spent most of the

bragging about her relationship and how in love Matt was with her. She excitedly talked about finally having her dream wedding and inviting all her old friends so she could finally show off. Then she asked Mom how much money she had saved up for the wedding. Mom looked shocked and told her she didn't have much since she had assumed Bonnie, being an adult, would be paying for her own wedding. Bonnie seemed offended by that and argued that, as the bride's family, we should pay for at least half of the wedding expenses. I stepped in, reminding her that she knew very well that we couldn't afford something like that. Hearing this, Bonnie started yelling, saying this was the final step to secure her future and that

after this, she would never ask for our help again. She insisted that we needed to contribute something, no matter how small, so it wouldn't be obvious how poor we were. Long story short, Mom and I scraped together whatever money we had saved up, and I even dipped into my own savings years of hard-earned money for my job to help Bonnie with the wedding. I loved my sister and wanted to do this one last thing for her to make her happy. Throughout her wedding planning, Bonnie hardly ever included me in the process. She didn't even ask me to be her maid of honor or a bridesmaid. I was a bit hurt, but I told myself it was her special day, not mine.

When the wedding day arrived, it was beautiful and magical. Bonnie had clearly gotten everything she wished for. She and Matt had invited hundreds of guests, and everything seemed to be going well. But during the reception, there seemed to be a shortage of staff. Guests were starting to grow restless as they waited for drinks and appetizers, and the few servers available were overwhelmed. Bonnie, clearly flustered, kept glancing around and eventually came up to me with a strange smile. She explained that the caterers had somehow underestimated the number of

of guests, and as a result, there weren't enough people to handle the serving duties. Bonnie asked if I could step in and help serve drinks and appetizers to the guests. I was stunned and looked at her like she was joking. I told Bonnie that I wasn't comfortable with the idea of serving guests at her wedding, especially after everything I had already contributed financially. I suggested that if there was a staff shortage, she should have arranged for more help in advance or that she should simply let things be for now. Bonnie rolled her eyes on me and insisted that I needed to do this for her as a favor because

Matt's family is wealthy unlike ours and that they were not used to waiting around. I vehemently refused and stood my ground, telling her this wasn't my problem. She then started to raise her voice, saying that I was being unreasonable and unhelpful. In my frustration, and having had a few drinks already, I lost my temper. I yelled loudly at Bonnie that just because we were poorer compared to Matt's family didn't mean she could treat me like a server at her wedding. I told her that mom and I had worked incredibly hard to pay whatever we could for the wedding, even though she had never done anything to help us in return. I shouted that it wasn't enough for her that we had been

pretending to be well off for months just to keep up appearances for her boyfriend. Meanwhile, she was off traveling the world on his money, while we were struggling out here to make ends meet. My words must have carried, because Matt came over, clearly worried, and asked what was happening. I told him how Bonnie had asked me to serve at her wedding when all the sacrifices Mom and I had made help fund it. Matt looked taken aback that Bonnie would make such a request. Bonnie, clearly fuming from my outburst, declared that I was a failure anyway, so why shouldn't she ask me to help? She smirked and told me that she would even pay me for doing this favor for her. I shot back, saying, at least I'm not a fraud like you. I'm not someone who, despite growing

up poor, hid my background, used drugs, got arrested, went to rehab, relied on our family for money, and then found a rich guy to support me. My sister went pale when she heard my words. Matt also looked stunned by this revelation. He turned to Bonnie and asked why she had told him a different version of her life and never mentioned her past drug use. Bonnie tried to stumble through an explanation, claiming she would have confessed everything after the marriage. but Matt's parents, who had by now heard everything, were outraged by her reply. They argued that Bonnie had no right to withhold such crucial information from them when they had welcomed her with open arms. They stated that they would have never given their blessing

or spent thousands on the wedding just to welcome a druggie into their family. Bonnie's face went red as the room fell into a stunned silence. Since the wedding, Matt has refused to let Bonnie back into his place. He has told her that he needs some space from her and her. her lies. This is why Bonnie has been living with my mom. Mom, while understanding why I reacted the way I did, feel sorry for Bonnie and is insisting that I went too far by spilling everything about Bonnie. She and Bonnie have been calling me repeatedly, asking me to talk to Matt and come up with some sort of new story to save her marriage. Ida for ruining my sister's marriage? Update 1. It's been more than a week since the wedding fiasco. To clarify, Bonnie did admit to

mom that she had told Matt a made-up story about our family at the start of their relationship because she didn't want to reveal the truth. Instead of saying that our dad left us with nothing, she claimed he had died rich and left us a lot of money that apparently helped us survive. Throughout their relationship, she continued to lie because she thought if she revealed the truth he would not trust her again. Matt and his family were so shocked when they heard me telling the truth because they had no idea about the magnitude of Bonnie's real past. I am sure had she been honest with him from the beginning, he might have had less issues with it. However, she knowingly chose to hide so much of herself that he must feel betrayed and disillusioned. Today, Matt reached out to me,

wanting to talk. I'll be meeting up with him and answering all his questions honestly. Update 2, I met up with Matt this week. He seemed really shaken up after what had happened at his wedding and urged me to open up about our entire family history. I told him the truth about how we were raised and we had to do to survive, and he was visibly shaken by what he heard. He revealed that Bonnie had lied to him so much, for example, she had lied to him about traveling to different places every year, having expensive family Christmas celebrations, and going to fancy places when in reality that was far from the truth. He was distraught how easily she could lie to his face throughout their relationship. She had even lied about her college background and had insisted that she had

gone to a fancier college. I'm not sure how she managed to keep up with her lies. for so long when the truth could have come out if Matt had asked us about it earlier. Honestly, I felt sorry for Matt, who was clearly shocked by the truth. He also revealed to me the reason why he and his family were so rattled about Bonnie's past drug use. It turns out that Matt had an older brother who died from a drug overdose years ago. They were still grieving for his brother to this day and missed him immensely. Matt confessed that after finding out the truth, he could not see Bonnie the same way.

He explained that his family was very protective of their wealth and had always advised him to be cautious about meeting someone. However, like a fool, he hadn't listened to their advice by getting Bonnie's background check done because he was in love with her and genuinely thought Bonnie was exactly who she appeared to be. Now that he was wrong and couldn't trust Bonnie any longer, he planned to annul their marriage as soon as possible. He was afraid that since they didn't have a pre-nup, Bonnie, with her history of lying and manipulation, could end up trying to claim part of his assets. Update 3. Hi, it's been five months since the incident. Matt and Bonnie ended up having their marriage annulled. Matt was kind enough to reimburse Mom and me for our part of the wedding expenses. Bonnie is devastated and blames me for destroying her marriage. She still lives

with Mom and is currently looking for a job. Initially, she used to send me several toxic messages while refusing to accept her own mistakes. So, I decided to block her. Mom no longer supports Bonnie blindly like before. I had several conversations with Mom, explaining how wrong Bonnie was and the extent of the lies she told Matt. I pointed out that if the roles had been reversed, we would never have trusted Matt for lying about his past and his financial details.

Mom now understands the situation better and agrees with what I did. I hope you enjoy this story. After a DNA result cast out, he walked away without ever meeting our child. It wasn't until much time passed that he confessed his sibling had interfered with the test, revealing the truth behind the deception, secretly in love with me and wanted to destroy our marriage. I am really confused right now, and I don't know what to do. I have come here to sort of vent and maybe ask for some advice.

My family and friends already know about the dumpster fire that is my life. I really don't feel like venting to them again, so internet strangers it is. I know that my situation will sound bizarre and maybe fake, but I promise you it's my real life. Two years ago, I would have laughed if someone had told me that this would happen to me. So I, 28F, got divorced from my ex-husband Darren, 28M, last year. It was an ugly separation and divorce. I won't say that it was because we fought a lot or acted petty. It was because of what we had to divorce in the first place.

No matter how bizarre this sounds, my marriage ended because Darren did a DNA test on our newborn daughter, and it showed that he wasn't the father. Before you call me names, let me tell you that I never cheated on my husband, nor was I assaulted. Back then, I had no idea why the DNA test said that my daughter wasn't my husband's. Maybe we were stupid but in the height of emotions, we didn't get a second DNA test. I did try in the beginning but Darren refused to talk to me or even see my face. He went to stay with his parents and I wasn't allowed anywhere near him.

We got a divorce and now two years after that DNA test destroyed everything the truth came out. Darren reached out to me yesterday to tell me that his brother Josh, 31M, had intentionally tampered with the DNA samples to break us up. Darren says that Josh did it because he was in love with me. I really don't know what to make of this. There were never any signs of Josh being in love with me. I did know before I knew Darren. Josh and I worked at the same company. I was there, freshly out of college, while he had been working there for a while. We weren't friends per se, but we were friendly. I didn't even meet

Darren through him. I met Darren randomly at my cousin's wedding. He was her colleague. By this point, I had shifted to another company and didn't see Josh at all. We occasionally chatted online, but that wasn't more than once a month. You can only imagine my surprise when I saw him at Darren's parents' place. He was shocked to see me, too. Like I said, we don't share every detail of our lives with each other. He knew I dated someone, and I knew he was single. That's it.

back, I think Josh was trying his best not to look too uncomfortable or annoyed. He hardly spoke to me, which I thought was odd. I thought that he was just a little overwhelmed. I knew he wasn't a very social person. Over time, I thought that we had a civil relationship. He somewhat avoided me and didn't really show up to even parties or gatherings. Again, he wasn't very social so even his own parents didn't see this as a red flag. I did wonder why, we didn't really talk anymore, but I was too busy with my life to worry about it too much. Eventually, Darren and I got married, and two years ago we had our daughter. Darren and I were both looking forward to my pregnancy. It wasn't planned, but we were happy.

My in-laws were happy as well. Josh was detached as he usually was. I really should have paid close attention to these things because now I am beating myself up for not seeing red flags. I had no idea that Josh would manipulate my husband so badly. He maintained his relationships with Darren and they hung out together as much as possible. Darren had been confiding in Josh about his fears and excitement about being a dad. I knew all of it and didn't think it was a problem. The problem started when Josh started filling Darren's head with nonsense. It all began when my ex-best friend was caught cheating on her boyfriend and trying to pass off someone else's child as his.

She had come to me crying one night because her boyfriend had kicked her out. I didn't know the whole story back then and took her in. When the truth came out, I confronted her and she didn't deny it. My father left my mother for his affair partner, so this one hit close to home. I ended up having a huge fallout with my ex-friend and kicked her out after Darren said that he won't host a cheater in his house. I was sad to lose my best friend, but I didn't have it in me to continue the friendship. I was seven months along during this time, so I was pretty emotional as well.

Josh somehow took advantage of this situation and started telling Darren that I may be cheating on him, too. I know this because Darren would sometimes act weird and make comments on it. Josh had gotten into Darren's head that I knew about and supported my friends cheating, which is why I took her in. He also said that I must have kicked her out so that she couldn't expose me and drag me down with her. There were things said about how my father was a serial cheater, and you can't escape what's in your blood. All in all, Josh convinced Darren that he needed to ask for a DNA test and make sure that the baby was his. After multiple fights and lots of crying, I agreed to have a DNA test after the baby was born.

I was offended and felt disrespected, but I didn't have anything to hide. I will also be honest and say that I never thought Darren would seriously go through with the DNA test. He was acting all loving and caring right until the time I gave birth. After I came home with the baby, Darren started to push for a DNA test again and so did Joshua references were made on how much paternity fraud is everywhere nowadays so it's not abnormal to want to be sure. I really wasn't in the mental space to deal with all this and I was too ashamed to tell my family about it.

So, I quietly agreed, thinking that Darren would shut up and make it right once the test came back positive. You already know that it didn't. Anyways, I won't get into too much of the depressing details of what happened next. Darren moved in with his parents, and I moved in with my mom. Since I was drowning in bad mental health and had a newborn to take care of, my sister moved in temporarily to help out. I wasn't working for three months before giving birth so I didn't have a lot of money for

lawyers and stuff. Darren wasn't giving me a dime and I was too traumatized from our fights to ask him for anything. For the next six months, I experienced hell and nearly lost my mind. My mother and sister helped me come back to the land of the living. I started to look after myself for my daughter's sake. Darren went completely silent, and so did his family. Eventually, at the one-year mark, we got a mutual divorce. None of us wanted to drag things out for my own mental health's sake.

I started working and slowly saved up so that I could move out of my mom's house. I started to take full responsibility for me and my daughter while my mother and sister helped with free babysitting. I was a broken woman and it took me a long time to process everything. I am doing decently fine or I was doing fine until I got an email from Darren. He is now begging for a chance to meet up and save our family. He wants to see our daughter who he hadn't seen since the DNA test came out. It was a very long email that basically said that he is ashamed of how he acted and he regrets letting Josh get into his head. He said a lot of other things, but I won't mention them here. Reading the email

has absolutely unsettled me. I don't even know what to think or do. Part of me is angry and hurt and doesn't want anything to do with Darren. Part of me wants to confront Josh and beat him into a pulp. The other part of me wants to meet and talk to Darren so that my daughter can have her father back in her life again. I am so confused right now, guys. What should I do? Edit, I came back from work to find a fair bit of comments on my post. I am tired and have a fussy two-year-old who needs my constant attention, so I can't reply to all individual questions. Please read this edit to find your doubts and answers.

Some of you commented on how he was able to switch the DNA test. My husband has always been very close to his brother, so they do everything together. When this stupid brother got into his head, Darren let him take over the entire process and even took him along when he visited the testing lab. I think in the midst of all this, somehow Josh was able to switch the containers and replace it with something else. I am not really sure about all the details,

but that's my theory. Part of me wants to meet up with Darren just to find out exactly what happened and how all this mess came into existence. He only gave me bits and pieces of information and has been begging to meet so that he could tell me the full story. I haven't really communicated back much or asked questions because something like this cannot happen over text.

Also, I don't know if things would get complicated if I end up visiting him so I don't know if it will be worth it. Two years is a long time, but the courts may still think that he is entitled to visitation of our child, especially since she is young. I grew up without a father and it wasn't a good experience. That's why I don't want that for my daughter. I am really confused right now about what to do. Getting back with Josh is pretty much off the table so anyone who thinks that I'm going to be a doormat and just take him back will be disappointed. I am not that delusional. Darren did something that completely destroyed our marriage and relationship. There won't be a second chance as far as I am concerned. Whatever dreams he has of getting his marriage back are just

dreams. They will not turn into a reality. You asked where my ex-husband's parents had been in all this. Well, I am not going to lie, but I had an amazing relationship with them. However, they turned their backs when the DNA test came out. To be very honest, both my mother-in-law and father-in-law had privately spoken to me before the DNA test and told me that they trust me and don't know why Josh is so hell-bent on proving me a cheater. Of course, they quickly changed their stance when the DNA test came out. I know for a fact that Darren was a mess and had some really bad mental health episodes. So, they focused on him and didn't really keep in touch.

Kudos to them for not calling me names or being rude. I didn't reach out to them either because I was too much of a mess and too busy grieving my marriage while taking care of my newborn. I haven't really heard back from them since then, and I doubt that will change. But, if they do reach out and want a relationship with my daughter, I'm going to give them a chance. It's too early to think about this much detail. Update 1, Hi guys, thank you so much for giving me your advice and perspectives. It has helped me make a decision. I will get into that a little later.

First, I'm going to address something that annoyed me a lot. A commenter was extremely offended that I didn't pursue Darren for child support or ask for a court-ordered DNA test. Well, it's easy for people to make assumptions and pass judgments while they are in a normal environment and are completely mentally sound. Maybe it's my fault for not mentioning that I had PPD, and all this DNA test drama resulted in me being messed up in the head. Darren was no better. I am not sure of the details, but some of his friends had left me nasty messages saying that I would be responsible if Darren ended up self-ending. That sent me into a panic attack and made things worse in my head, so I never asked to elaborate or wasted details. My sister is the one who blocked all of them and took full control of my phone after this particular day.

My mother had talked to Darren's parents and told me that the best course of action would be to just have a mutual divorce. Darren wasn't able to attend too many meetings and I didn't have the time and energy to drag it out either. I am not sure why Darren didn't opt to drop his name from the birth certificate. Again, it might be due to the fact that he wasn't in a good place mentally. My mom has raised me as a single mom so she always taught me to take responsibility for my own child without relying on anyone. I had plenty of help, so I didn't think about pursuing child support. Maybe I would have once the little one started school and expenses would pile up. Looks like I may not have to worry about that because I have already decided on meeting with Darren.

I have the full support of my family, so I am confident in my stance. You guys left some lovely comments from my mother and sister. I showed them all those comments and DMs. They are touched by all the love they got. But they also said that families should be this way and try their best to help out when someone is in trouble. God knows what would have happened to me if they weren't around. I can't tell you how many sleepless nights they had spent consoling me and taking care

of my daughter because I was simply not in the mental headspace to properly care for her at that moment. My brother-in-law is also a gem of a man because instead of being mad at my sister for helping me, he contributed to the fun that was made to support me during the divorce. My luck in marriage has been downright crap, but my family is the best on this planet. I guess that's enough for me. One thing I didn't mention was that my brother-in-law also encouraged me to meet up with Darren and maybe set up visitation with my daughter.

I really respect his opinion and understand his reasoning, so it helped me make the right decision. Someone had reached out to me in the DMs to tell me that, despite what happened, Darren could easily take me to court and get visitation. I don't want to make things that ugly. I wanted to see if Darren was truly ready to be a father, so I opted to meet up with him and judge him myself before making any decision. Sorry to everyone who told me not to do that.

I needed this closure as well no matter how selfish that sounds. I have already set up a date and arranged to meet at a public place. My brother-in-law will accompany me because my mother and sister may end up punching the living daylights out of Darren if they see him. I don't want any violence involved in this meeting, and I like my family out of of jail than inside it. Everything is said and I admit that I am feeling a little nervous. I have saved all the texts and taken proper screenshots of our conversations in case things go south and lawyers become involved. I fully intend to discuss visitation with my daughter if things go well.

But if I suspect that Darren is putting up an act or isn't actually being genuine in his desire to see our daughter, I'm going to take a step back and not even mention visitation or anything. I hope for my daughter's sake that Darren turns out to be genuine in his desire to rebuild his relationship with our daughter. I have already mentioned in the edit and I'm going to say it again that I won't be getting back with Darren. That possibility has gone down to zero. I am definitely not looking for excuses to get back with him. The trust is gone and so is the love. I am only doing this for closure and for my daughter. I am sorry if any of you don't agree with me. You guys, really helped me with a lot of perspective and good advice. I have to thank you for that because

I appreciate your perspective and insights. I will definitely keep all your advice in mind before making new decisions on this situation. Update 2, I met up with Darren, and things went as well as you might expect. It was a long and hard conversation with lots of yelling and crying. It was mostly me who yelled and he who cried. It was a mess and almost like a dumpster fire. Things became a little so we had to leave the cafe we met at and go to my brother-in-law's place to talk. I didn't want to put on a show for strangers. I was stupid or naive to think that it would be a calm conversation. Things just don't happen that way.

I had a lot of repressed anger that I needed to let out. Doing it in public was a little embarrassing, so we moved to a more private space. Darren and I talked while Keith monitored us. Some of you wanted to know the details of what happened. Well, I can't make a book out of this post so I will only give you some details. So, apparently, Josh switched the DNA samples with those of his friend. This same friend ended up confessing to Darren because he was about to be a father and finally understood the gravity of what he did. This friend was the one who spilled the beans on Josh

being in love with me and all that jazz. He also sent Darren text-proof, among others that Darren then showed me. I am even more disgusted with Josh than I was before. It's only my good luck that he hadn't contacted me after all this. Apparently, Josh was a little spooked with the aftermath of what happened. Darren made a self-ending attempt, which made Josh both remorseful and scared. He knew that his actions had some severe consequences, which is why he never tried to contact me after the divorce. The friend also said that Josh wasn't sure if and how he would convince me to be with him. He just didn't want to see his brother have a family with me. He didn't have a step-by-step plan or anything. It was done on impulse that later blew up in his face. Josh had apparently

begged his friend not to tell anyone, and his friend listened but broke that promise recently. As of now, Josh and Darren's entire family and friend group know the truth. The friend also got cut off, but he said that he doesn't mind and would rather face the consequences than keep lying and bring in more bad karma. I have no comments about this guy or Josh. I am not even going to get into the disturbing details that Darren told me and showed me proof. I am also not going to detail the entire conversation I had with Darren. Those things are highly personal and I am uncomfortable putting it out in the open. Long story short, he begged for forgiveness but I didn't give it to him. I did, however, tell him that I was willing to let him see our daughter and set up visitation

with a lawyer. But, I wanted to go to therapy with him and see for myself if he is really fit to be a father. He has been seeing a therapist since the separation, so we will just go together and see what progress he has made. We will contact our lawyers and set up visitation only if I am satisfied with what the therapist says. He might be remorseful and desperate to have his daughter in his life, but I am not taking any chances. I learned my lesson the hard way. Darren did ask for couples counseling with the intention to be together again eventually. But, I shut it down fast and told him in no uncertain terms that it won't happen again. I have already fallen out of love and have very few feelings towards him whatsoever.

I have realized that whatever lingering feelings I have are because of our history and good memories, and not because I am still in love with him. I don't really care if he feels anything towards me anymore as long as it doesn't end up affecting our child. That's a possibility I am a little afraid of. I think that Darren wouldn't be crazy enough to use our daughter to get me back or anything, but then again he did surprise me before so never say never. I really hope that he got the hint and will deal with his feelings on his own. No matter how angry I am, I genuinely want him to move on and be a good father to our daughter. I think my daughter deserves that. So, that's what we talked about.

Darren asked my permission to let his parents contact me. been dying to talk to me but didn't want to intrude or approach me without permission. That's why he wanted Darren to ask for permission on their behalf. I have since talked to my ex-in-laws over the phone. There were a lot of apologies and very respectful requests to meet my daughter. I told them that I wasn't going to promise anything, but I'll try to let them meet her. My mother-in-law and I have decided to talk again later because I was too emotionally drained to have a long conversation with her. This is where we are at right now.

I would say that all in all, the talk went well. No one acted entitled or made demands or tried to minimize their actions. The only bad thing that happened is that I got a lot of disturbing details about Josh's feelings for me. My therapist will have a field day tomorrow when I pay her a surprise visit. Anyway, this is the update for now. If anything changes or something happens, I will let you know if you guys are interested. Thank you for all your input and guidance. Update 3, I didn't get a lot of DMs and comments asking for an update, but I did get some.

I figured that I would just make this last update to end this post once and for all. I will also admit that it is a way for me to vent a little because things have been pretty intense for the past two months. I won't lie, but it did take me some time to adjust to the new normal. As of now, Darren has been visiting our daughter every weekend. We contacted lawyers and drew up papers. Darren is also going to start paying child support. He did offer payment for the last two years, but I declined because I know that during the divorce, he had lost his job because of his mental health issues.

He had been unemployed for six months after which he finally got a job. You can say that I feel bad for him. My mother and sister agree that I don't have to milk him anymore. He is now paying a hefty amount of child support on his own accord anyway. I know that the courts wouldn't have given me so much child support if I had sued. Anyway, more news on that I need to tell you about what happened with Joshua. Some of you had been disappointed that Josh got away without any real consequences. Well, actually, that's not true.

Shortly after my last post, I had a long phone call with my ex-mother-in-law. She told me that Josh was basically disowned by the family after everything came out. No one really wanted to keep in touch with him anymore. My ex-in-laws decided to cut him out of their will as well. This was mostly due to the fact that Josh had shown no remorse when confronted in person. He tried to shrug it off and say that it wasn't a big deal. At one point, he even said that what happened was inevitable because Darren didn't love me enough to trust me or be with me despite the DNA tests.

There was a fistfight later, and Josh ended up with a lot of injuries. He was still acting like everyone was overreacting until his friend started cutting him off. Then, he was informed of being disowned and cut out of his parents' will. Instead of finally accepting his mistakes, he showed up to my house and basically demanded that I fix everything because apparently I am responsible for his life going to crap. He was drunk out of his mind and was acting really scary. I was lucky that my childhood friend Dylan was with me when this happened. Josh got really aggressive and ended up trying to strangle me when I told him to leave and

that this is his problem not mine. Anyway, cops were called, charges were pressed, and now I have a restraining order in place. He was only let go with probation because he had no prior record. But a bonus point is that he had to pay me for damages and also lost his job because of the police case. Thankfully, he wasn't dumb enough to show up at my door to complain again. It's not like he would fund me, though, because I have already moved to another place. I didn't feel safe continuing to be in that house, and since my lease expired last month, I decided to move.

A spot near my friend's apartment opened up and it is also close to my mom's house, so I took it. This is the same friend who tackled Josh when he tried to attack me. I am not going to hide the fact that this friend and I are dating. It's been four months actually. I have known him all my life, so it was fairly easy to move forward with this. We are taking things slow and haven't told many people yet. It may be too early to say this, but I have finally started to feel hopeful about my future again. I also told Darren about my dating my childhood friend because I wanted him to know that I was

serious about moving on. He looked sad and didn't say much, which is a good thing, I guess. Anyway, Darren has been spending time with our daughter every week. at our place. We sometimes go out to parks as well. I have been attending sessions with his therapist and feel positive that he is ready to be a good dad. These sessions also made us communicate better, which is necessary since we will co-parent from now on. Overall, I think I made the correct decision to meet up with Darren and give him another chance. My ex-in-laws have also met my daughter again, and we spent two great evenings together. So, I would say that life has been

getting better on all fronts. Saying that, I think this is going to be my last update. I hope it ties up all the loose ends and gives you the same closure that I got. I hope you enjoy this story. Spouse had an affair with my wealthy supervisor and insulted me as a financially unsuccessful individual when I approached her about it, asserting that I am incapable of providing for her in the same manner as my supervisor does, and that she wants a divorce. So this is what I did. I, 26M, have been married to my wife, Zoe 23F, for one year. We had been together for the last four years and in spite of our differences, we had been able to make it so far.

Zoe and I come from very different kinds of families and she has had a very different life from mine. We met each other when we were in college at a mutual friend's birthday party. It was pretty much love at first sight for me because she was the most beautiful person I had ever seen and when I started talking to her, I realized that she was just as charming as she was beautiful. Over the course of the next couple of months, we got to know each other better through text and we went out on a lot of dates before getting into a relationship. But it was not until we had started living together that she told me about her family.

That had always been a huge question mark for me since she had told me that she did not want me to meet her family, as she did not get along well with them and had been in no contact with them for a couple of years. After being together for almost a year, I finally told her that I wanted her to tell me more about her family because it felt like she was hiding something for me on purpose, and I was not comfortable with that idea since she knew everything about me. So then, she finally told me that she and her parents were no longer in touch because they had kicked her out of the house when she started college. They had wanted her to drop out and start working so she could contribute to the family, but she wanted to get a degree and they were not

happy about it. So they got into a big fight and she left home after they told her that she could get out of their house. She chose to leave and then, with a lot of help from a couple of relatives and a few friends, she was able to gather enough money to pay her tuition and then that's how she put herself through college. Apparently, her parents had always been like that. They were really stingy and not even willing to work hard enough to earn their own money, so they were constantly relying on help from relatives to bail them out. That's why most of their family members did not even like their family, and they had been ostracized for how her parents always tried to manipulate people

into giving them money and promise that they would return it, but they never would. They ran a flop makeup and beauty business together, and they had wanted her to join them eventually, but she cut them off instead. She told me that it had been a task for her to even get her relatives to agree because of the kind of reputation that her parents had but, thankfully, they pet her because of how desperate she was and agreed to help her without expecting anything in return. She told me that she owed a lot of money to a lot of people, and that was why she was working so hard so early in life, getting a degree, and also making sure that she earned money

from a part-time job as well. I thought that it was pretty inspiring, and I wanted to help her out, so I told her that I would also start contributing and would help her pay off her debts. As I mentioned above, I come from a very different family compared to hers. My dad is an ophthalmologist and my mom is an entrepreneur, she deals in handmade jewelry online and it's pretty successful. So I grew up pretty comfortable and money has never been an issue for me. That's not to say that I don't care about money and I just throw it around, I'm not that kind of a person, but I've just never had to struggle with it. That's what I'm trying to say. So when I learned about Zoe's story, I was touched because she had kept it a secret for me for so long because she was afraid that I would think of her as a gold digger, like a couple of other people had said when they first found out that she was dating me.

After talking to her about it, we decided that I was going to help her out as well so she could pay off her debts faster. I would send her a specific amount of money every month and then, she would come to me and tell me that it was really helpful. I never bothered to ask her the details of the transactions because I trusted her and she had never given me any reason not to. I don't think she knew that the money that I was giving her came from my own salary and I was not borrowing anything from my parents. But she did not need to know that, so it was fine. At the time, the two of us were living together, she had moved into my parents. my apartment and I handled all the bills. I was earning by then, so it was not a problem for me. She had just graduated, so she was still looking for a full-time job, and I did not want her to

waste her salary whenever I was perfectly capable of doing it on my own. We were happy together for the four years that we had been living together, including the past year after we got married. Her behavior started changing slightly after we got engaged, but it was not obvious for me to actually notice. And once we got engaged, I got very busy at work as well, since I had to finish everything up before I left for my honeymoon. I did not have enough time to notice small and insignificant things like Zoe spending a lot of time on her phone, often coming home really late from her job, and how she had almost stopped looking for a full-time job. I wasn't worried about any of those things since she had just graduated. I knew that she would find something to do. And then we

got married, almost a year ago, which was funded entirely by my parents and me. Did not have much family to speak of, so we could not expect her parents to chip in and very few guests as well, so we believed that it would be best for us to fund the entire thing. She hadn't even offered to contribute, but I was fine with it. I did not think that was strange because she had already explained her situation to me. So I was fine with it, and even after the wedding, I decided to continue paying all the the major bills and stuff, not expecting her to split anything with me at any point. She continued to tell me that she was still looking for something, but none of the jobs

that were being offered were suited to her taste, and she wanted something a little more challenging. I believed her, and I also knew that she had been working for a really long time, so she deserved some rest. And I did not say anything to her about it. We also stopped at the arrangement where I would send her a certain amount of money every month and she would be offered debts with it. Or at least I believe that that's what she was doing with it. Unfortunately, a couple of days ago, I found out that she had been cheating on me with my boss. I wasn't snooping or anything, it had been completely coincidental. She was in the shower and I was sitting in the living room where her laptop was charging.

I think she was watching something, I don't remember, but then all of a sudden, I saw that she was receiving a voice call on Instagram, from an account named Unknown Lover. So my first instinct was obviously to answer the call and I immediately heard my boss's voice asking her why she had taken so long to answer the call. I hung up immediately and tried to make sense of this. I tried to convince myself that there might be some innocent explanation for this, but then, when I opened Instagram on her laptop, and then I opened the chats with this account, I realized that they had been having an affair for quite a while, from before we got married.

I scrolled back as far as I could, and I'm really lucky that Zoe takes such long showers because it gave me enough time to scroll back and realize that they had actually started flirting around the time that we got engaged. From what I gathered after reading the chats, my boss, 32M, had tried to hit on her at my engagement party and she had responded well to it. So after that, he created a burner account to do that. flirt with her and that's how their affair started. I realized that they had been sleeping together for a really long time and she had been more verbally affectionate than she had ever been with me,

because in those messages, she constantly kept telling him that she loved him, and she was ready to leave everything for him, including me. It was my boss who was holding out on the relationship because he was also married and even had a child aged around five or six as well. He had told her to wait and they would get together soon, that's why she was waiting with me. To say that I was devastated would be an understatement and I started crying as soon as I read those messages. In the meantime, Zoe had come out of the shower and when she heard me crying, she came to my side to comfort me, but then she saw what I was reading on screen and took a couple of steps back. Instead of trying to deny it or apologizing to me, she just stood there silently while I cried.

After a while, I got really frustrated and I asked her what the heck was that and she told me point blank, that she had been waiting for me to find out and had actually been thinking about telling me herself because she didn't want to be with me anymore. She told me that she was exhausted from pretending to love me and confess that she had actually fallen out of love with me a couple of weeks after we got married. She had realized that my boss was the right man for her. I asked her why she believed that she told me that it was quite simple for her because she knew that a broke loser like me would never be able to treat her the way that my boss did. She even bragged about how a couple of months ago, she had told me that she was going out for the weekend with her friends and taking a girl's trip, but actually, she had been out with my boss, and her friends had been covering for her.

So that explained all the fancy new gifts that her so-called friends were getting her and all the expensive clothes, bags, makeup, and jewelry that she was sporting all of a sudden. She had been telling me that a friend of hers had come into a lot of money and was treating all of them with these things, but now I know the truth, it was my boss. She said that she was lucky that I had found out on my own and now, she wanted a divorce because she was sick of pretending that she was interested in me. She even said that she would rather be single or be my boss's mistress than be my wife anymore, and this marriage was over.

Before I could even process what was going on, she started packing her things. I did not beg her to stay, I had more pride than that, and I was hurting, my heart was broken, and I knew that I had to let her go. She hadn't even tried to deny anything or even apologize to me for what she had done. In fact, she seemed pretty happy to be going. She was about to grab her laptop and leave, but I told her that anything that I had done, bought for her, was nothing. It was my money and not her. She made a face when I told her that, but didn't try to argue and left the laptop at my house. Everything else that I had bought her

remained with me. But honestly, the laptop was more important for me and I actually had a plan in my mind. I needed that as proof of the divorce because I was not going to let her off easily. And I was also not going to forgive my boss for this because even though we had a good one, good working relationship, he had no right to hit on my wife and then do such nasty crap to me. And the fact that even after he had been hooking up with my wife, he had the audacity to face me in the office and act all nice to me to my face is what pissed me off the most. I was his guy for everything and knowing that I had let him count on me, but he was screwing me behind my back was what really pushed me to the edge.

I had done a lot of things for him, going beyond the scope of what was required of me in my job description, and I had always tried to be a great employee, but that day, I made up my mind that I was going to make sure that this guy paid the price for what he had done to me. I knew a lot of the shady stuff that he had been up to and recently. He had failed his drug tests that had been conducted company-wide, and I knew exactly where those documents were. I knew he was caught up in a lot of shady and illegal stuff, and if I exposed him for one thing, all his other secrets would come out eventually on their own. He was in cahoots with the team that had conducted the drug tests and had them print a

completely different result, one that wouldn't expose him. He had bribed the head of the medical team and had paid him half the money that he had been offering him in advance before the test, but after getting the results that he wanted, my boss had decided to go back on his word and told the other guy that he was not going to pay him the rest of the amount. So they were having a little bit of a tiff. I was the only person who knew about it because my boss had told me that he trusted me and wanted me to speak to the other guy and deal with this. The head of the team had actually sent us the real results of the test to threaten my boss and show him that he was serious, that if he did not get the rest of the money that he had been promised he would make it known to everybody that my boss had a problem.

My boss had received the real test results just a couple of days before I found out about Zoe, and we had been discussing it in his office. He had been really freaked out by it and I remember where he had kept those papers as well. So the day that I found out about him and Zoe, I made up my mind that I was going to expose him. The next morning, I got up extra early and made my way to the office. I had a spare set of keys for everything since my boss would often make me run errands and make me come in early for that. I even had a spare set of keys for his office, so getting in there was not any trouble for me. Once I was in, I grabbed the actual test results from his desk drawers and headed to the police station. There, I explained the entire situation to the cops and left them to deal with it.

After that, I decided that whatever happened to my boss was not my problem. He got arrested, obviously, since the traces of the drugs that had been found in his bloodstream were not exactly legal. Not only he but also the medical team that was in charge of the drug tests are under investigation now. So basically, everybody is in a lot of trouble right now and it's all because of me. I'm not even bothering to hide it. I've told the cops in charge of the case that I'll be here if they need any help and I have also quit my job because I don't want to be caught up with anything else there. My boss is under investigation right now and I don't know if he's going to be charged or not,

but I am really satisfied with the fact that I got him into trouble and he has been suspended for now, but the claims that I have made it turn out to be true, he's going to be fired, and then he's going to jail. The only person who is upset about this is obviously Zoe since she has been calling me for the last couple of days, ever since the news about my boss got out, accusing me of ruining her and her boyfriend's life. She keeps telling me that doing this to my boss, just because I'm mad about the affair, is simply not all right and she's really disappointed. She thinks that what I did was very extreme and unfair because it did not come from a place of righteousness, but from a place of revenge and that's never okay. So I defer reporting my boss to the police for drug usage when I found out he was hooking up with my wife.

Update 1. One week has passed since my post here and I have filed for divorce. I did it before Zoe, and speaking of her, I have blocked her everywhere. I realized what a snake she was and I have stopped second. in guessing myself. I did the right thing, there are no two ways about it. It doesn't even matter what my intention really was since I reported somebody who was doing something illegal. My boss is not even a good guy, so I don't have to feel guilty about what I'm doing. Had he been a genuinely nice person with a drug problem, I might have thought twice before putting him through this, but as we all know, that's not what is happening. I feel disgusted that I let Zoe live with me and

did so much for her for so long. More than anything else, I feel like a total idiot for being in love with her. A lot of you have asked me if there were really no signs and I'm sorry, but I have to tell you guys that I don't think anybody else in my place would have ever been able to guess at the reality of the situation either. She had been acting perfectly normally with me, even after the affair started in earnest. I don't think I would have ever been able to know that she was cheating on me if I had not found out about it the way that I did. So there were no signs, and even if there were, I never would have believed that she was cheating on me. Because of everything that I have done for her, I did it out of love. I never thought that she was actually using me. I have even

begun to doubt her entire story about her not being in touch with her parents because she wanted to get a degree, and they wanted her to work. I don't think that's true anymore and I also don't think that she was using my money to pay off her debts. Because there were never any updates on that and, like a fool, never bothered to ask either. Because I trusted her blindly and I realized now that I shouldn't have done that. It was a huge mistake. Looking back, I realized that I was very idiotic about certain things. I trusted her more than she deserved. But no worries, now that the divorce is happening, I'm going to get her back. Update 2. So 3 days ago, Zoe was served with the divorce papers and today, we got a response from her.

She's not contesting the divorce, but she does not agree with the terms of the petition and wants to negotiate. I'm all right with that, she can bring it on. She is demanding that she get to keep the house, a massive settlement amount, an alimony, on top of that. I must say, her claims are pretty bold, what she has done to me. I don't think anybody who was a known cheater would bother to come up with such an elaborate petition to keep everything for themselves and make it so obvious that they are nothing but a gold digger. It's very bad now that she is after my money, there is nothing more that she wants. I don't even think that she cares about my boss that much. Now he's not in a position to support her financially.

She is cold and calculated, and I am glad that I am getting to see the side of her so that it destroys any feelings of love or love. affection that I still have somewhere within me. I won't lie, I am really disappointed about the way she has turned out to be, but I know that I'm going to destroy her in court, so it doesn't matter. I can feel disappointment and process my emotions, but first, I have to win this thing. We are meeting with a court-appointed mediator in a couple of days. We'll see how it goes. I also finally found the courage to talk to my parents about this. I had been hiding it from them because I was really ashamed and embarrassed by what was going on. But I realized that this was huge and I needed to talk to them. And I'm glad that I did because they were pretty supportive

of me and told me that they were willing to help me out in whichever way that I needed, financially or emotionally. And I think I will need to rely on them for money for quite some time since I have quit my job and I am currently in the process of looking for another. With all my bills, rent, and now, the fee of my lawyer, everything is going to be really expensive for me and I'll have to dip into my savings. I don't know when I'll find a new job since I'm still embroiled in the drug controversy with my boss and he is under trial right now, so I don't think any company will be willing to take me on at the moment. I am acting as a witness against him and it has been really emotionally draining to do that, but I know that what I'm doing is the right thing to do and

that's what is keeping me going. But honestly speaking, worse comes to worst, I'll just start working for my dad. At least with him, I know for a fact that my boss will never try to screw me over. Update 3. So, the negotiations have started. It has been one and a half weeks since I received the response to my divorce petition. The trial of my boss is still ongoing, so no updates on that. But then negotiations with my son to be ex-wife are not going that well. In the sense that she is being really demanding and is straight up lying through her teeth during these meetings, trying to make me look like the bad guy in villainizing me to justify her claims. She's acting like the victim in a situation and it's severely annoying me.

She shows up to these meetings, looking like a widow, like she has been through so much. I can see right through her little act and it's disgusting. I know what she's trying to do and it might sway the mediator, but it's not going to work on me or my lawyer. We are not backing down from our claims, we are definitely going to get what we rightfully deserve. There is no way on earth that I'm letting her walk away with the kind of settlement that she is demanding in alimony.

I don't even know why she thinks she's entitled to it, just because she's unemployed right now. I mean, she literally cheated on me. I think that pretty much disqualifies her from it anyway. And I have the proof for it, I have the laptop containing all the text and stuff. She hasn't bothered to log out of her account and it doesn't matter anyway, even if she does now, since I have screenshots of the entire thing, of all her chats and I have produced them during these meetings, but she claims that she had apparently been forced to look for love outside of our marriage

because I used to treat her so badly. She is claiming that I used to make her do all the work around the house, I forced her to quit her job, and I promised her that I would take care of her, but now, I'm refuting those things that I had said and I'm going back on my word. None of that is true, we all know it. And it just boils my blood every time she starts saying things like that.

I have to use all the power in my body to restrain myself from just walking out of those meetings. My lawyer has advised me that I keep my cool, but it's really difficult to do so, given the circumstances. I'm really frustrated, I won't lie. I feel like things are getting really difficult for me right now, I'm finding it harder and harder every single meeting to keep my head cool. But I know that I have to get through it, I just hope that things come to an end soon. I still have had no luck on the job front, so that's another disappointment that I have to deal with. The news about me exposing my boss has been doing the rounds and that sort of negative reputation in our industry, or any industry, for that matter, it's not conducive for employers to hire me.

So it feels like I might actually have to start working for my dad. Nothing wrong with that, I just hope that maybe I might be able to make a way for clearly, it's going to be very difficult, now that I have picked a fight with the wrong people. Update 4, hey, so it has been two months since I filed for a divorce and today, I'm not going to talk about that, but I'm here to tell you guys that my boss is going to jail. I'm not sure for how long, I think it might be two or three years. But he might get out earlier, for good behavior. Anyway, the point is that he is in jail right now. The only person I feel bad for in this situation is his wife. I know for a fact that she is a stay-at-home mom and is completely reliant on his salary for everything.

So now that he is not going to be earning, life is going to get pretty difficult for her. I feel bad for her, and the child, obviously. They deserve better than this, but unfortunately, unfortunately, this is how it is for them right now. As for me, I have started working for my dad. Surprise. rise. My dad, thankfully, was really nice about this and did not, for once, make me feel weird about it. And the divorce proceedings are still going on. We still haven't been able to come to a conclusion about the settlement and all of that, so negotiations are still ongoing. But I'm trying

not to let her get under my skin anymore, it's much easier now that I don't like her at all. update 5, hi, so it's been almost six months since my last update. I got really busy after that since I was working for my father, and I forgot to update you guys. Anyway, a couple of months ago, my divorce finally came through. Zoe had to agree to my terms of the petition because that was the best route for her since the mediator made it clear that if we were not able to come to one decision, then this would go to court, and it would be much more difficult for us there. He said to both of us, but I knew that he was actually talking about Zoe because he had been able to see right through her bluff. And she had been able to lie during our negotiation sessions, but she wouldn't be able to do that in family court, there would be really bad consequences of that. So long story short, she had no other option, and she had to concede.

Now, she and I are divorced, and we have no contact with each other. I like it better this way, to be honest. I am going to therapy, trying to work on myself. It's going to be a long road while I'm trying to get there, but I know I'll get there eventually. I have wonderful friends and really supportive parents. I'll keep them close and get through this. I hope you enjoy this story. Mother-in-law continued delivering food for my spouse and claimed my culinary skills were inadequate for her son,

until I discovered her messaging my husband's former girlfriend to get cooking tips, and she admitted his ex had been cooking all the meals she brought over for months. My mother-in-law is borderline crazy and I need help. You see, I've been married to Brian for a year now. Our families have known each other for a long time and have always been close, so it felt natural when our parents suggested that we might be a good match for each other. We both come from similar religious backgrounds, which made it easier for us to connect.

Our shared values gave us a good foundation to build our relationship. Before me, Brian had a serious relationship with a woman named Vivian. They were really close, and it seemed like things were getting pretty serious between them. However, there was one major issue, their families didn't get along. While Brian's parents adored Vivian and wanted her to become a part of the family as quickly as possible, Vivian's parents didn't feel the same way about Brian's family. They thought Brian's family was too strict and religious, which created a huge conflict. In the end, Vivian's parents didn't approve of her marrying Brian and put a lot of pressure on her to end the relationship.

I'm not entirely sure why Vivian decided to listen to her parents, but eventually, she broke things off, telling Brian that she couldn't see a future with him. It really hurt Brian, and he took it hard for a long time. But, after some time, he understood the situation and managed to move on. Two years later, we met, and things started to fall into place. From the very beginning, Brian was really open and honest with me about his past relationship with Vivian. He told me about the breakup and explained that the main reason for their split was the clash between their families.

He also warned me about his mom, saying that she could be a bit too much at times. He mentioned that despite all the boundaries he had tried to set with her, she often overstepped them. Honestly, none of this bothered me much. Since his mother was already a family friend of my mom's, I thought maybe it wouldn't be as big of a deal as he was making it out to be. I had seen his mom around over the years, and she always seemed pretty manageable to me. However, it wasn't until I got engaged to Brian that I really began to notice a different side to his mom. Since we were planning to get married,

Brian suggested that I move in with him. At first, everything seemed fine. But one morning, after I had just finished a shower, I walked into the kitchen to find his mom casually going through our fridge like it was her own. I was completely taken aback, and I asked her what she was doing. She casually told me that she had a key to the apartment and sometimes came over to father-in-law up the fridge. It felt so strange and invasive to me. I politely told her that now that I was living here too, I would really appreciate it if she could give me a heads up before just showing up unannounced. Her face tightened, and she looked upset, but she didn't say anything in response. I thought maybe she got the message.

But the very next week, I came home for lunch to find her rummaging through my closet. At first, I honestly thought someone had broken into the house, and I was ready to call the police. But when I realized it was just her, I was absolutely livid. I screamed at her, asking what on earth she was doing in our home again. She responded nonchalantly, saying that she was just looking through my closet to see if there was any dirty laundry she could wash for me. That really crossed the line. I told her, very firmly, that I was an adult, and I could take care of my own laundry, so there was no reason for her to be going through my personal things.

I made it clear that this was completely unacceptable. That same day, I had a serious talk with Brian about what had happened, and he was just as shocked as I was. He didn't hesitate for a second he immediately called his mom and told her she needed to return the key to our place. He was pretty upset and honestly, he was really blunt with her, even yelling at her for going through our personal things without permission. It was an uncomfortable and awkward moment, but I appreciated how he had my back. At least I felt like he was standing up for me, and I hoped that this would set some boundaries with his mom moving forward. I ended up telling my parents about it, and they were just as surprised. They couldn't believe that his mom was acting like that,

but in the end, mother-in-law did return the key and apologize to me, so we decided to let the whole situation go and move on. Things felt a little more peaceful after that, though it did leave me with an unsettled feeling, wondering if she would try something like that again. Then, just a few months before our wedding, something unexpected happened. Vivian Bryan's ex sent him a message on Facebook. She basically told him how much she regretted leaving him and admitted that hearing he was with someone else had made her think about trying again. She even said she wanted to give their relationship one last try. When Brian showed me the message, we both kind of laughed at it. I wasn't upset, just amused at how out of the blue it was. Brian didn't waste any time and

didn't respond to her at all. He just blocked her immediately, and I thought that was the right move. Later, Brian casually mentioned the situation to his mom, and she got kind of upset. She said, said Brian should have had the decency to at least talk to Vivian when she reached out, but Brian didn't back down. He told her he had nothing left to say to Vivian and that she was a thing of the past. Mother-in-law seemed a little taken aback by his response, but she didn't press him any further. It felt like another reminder of how boundaries needed to be set with her, even if she didn't always agree with them.

Then came the wedding and things got even more complicated with my mother-in-law. She insisted that Brian invite Vivian, his ex, to the wedding. Brian immediately told her that he didn't want to see his ex at our wedding this was about us, not about her. But my mother-in-law didn't back down. She argued that it was only right to have Vivian there because she had been such an important part of Brian's life for so many years. According to her, without Vivian, the whole thing just wouldn't feel right. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Not feel right? Vivian was his ex for a reason. Why on earth did she even need to be at our wedding? I was shocked, but I was relieved when Brian stood firm and told her no.

He wasn't going to invite Vivian, and that was final. On the day of our wedding, things got even more awkward with my mother-in-law. She showed up in a lilac gown that was almost white something that felt like an attempt to upstage me. At first, I was really thrown off by it, but I decided it wasn't worth making a scene over. I just ignored her and focused on having a great day with Brian. Thankfully, the rest of the wedding went smoothly, and we had a wonderful time. Now, it's been a year since Brian and I got married, and things are good between us. We're happy together, but there's still one ongoing issue my mother-in-law.

For some strange reason, she's still completely fixated on Brian's ex. Even after our marriage, she continues to bring Vivian up in conversations, and it's starting to under my skin. Out of nowhere, during family dinners, she'll casually ask Brian if he ever thinks about Vivian and wonders how his life would have turned out if she had stayed with him. Brian always gives her a weird look, and I can feel myself glaring at her from across the table, but she acts like it's the most normal question in the world, completely unaware of how inappropriate and uncomfortable it is. It's like she just can't let go of the past, and every time she brings it up, it makes things feel strained. Over time, I've noticed more and more that my

mother-in-law is constantly bringing up Vivian, especially when it comes to things like food. Whenever I cook, she can't help but make comments about how much she misses Vivian's cooking, saying it was so much better than mine. At first, I thought maybe it was just a random comment, but it kept happening, and it started to feel really uncomfortable. It wasn't just about food, though. One time, when we were talking about children and people were asking me and Brian when we were going to try for kids, my mother-in-law suddenly interrupted the conversation and said that if Brian had married Vivian, they would have had beautiful skin children. I was shocked. It was such a strange, unsolicited comment, and it left both Brian and me feeling uneasy. Her comments were never subtle,

and every time she brought up Vivian, it felt like a subtle dig at me. Brian and I really don't why she keeps bringing up his ex. He's asked her multiple times to stop mentioning Vivian, but her response is always the same. She didn't mean anything serious by it, and as his mother, it's her right to wonder what could have been. It's frustrating because she seems to dismiss how uncomfortable it makes both of us. She also has this habit of mentioning how Vivian was always her first choice for him, and how he just settled for me. It feels like a constant reminder that I'm not good enough, and it's hard not to take it personally. The recent incident with the food, though, really pushed me to my limit. My mother-in-law has this habit of bringing over meals for Brian

because, according to her, my cooking is unfit for her son. She constantly tells him how she's doing him a favor by bringing over meals because she believes I'm not a good cook, even though Brian has never once complained about my food. I honestly don't mind her bringing food over it's one less thing for me to worry about. But the real issue is that, after eating her meals, Brian has started commenting that the food tastes so much like what Vivian used to cook. And if he ever asks my mother-in-law about it, she tells him that she's been trying to replicate Vivian's cooking because she was such a good cook. I can't even put into words how hurtful that is. It feels like a constant reminder that no matter what I do, I'm being compared to someone else.

and what's worse is that my mother-in-law seems to enjoy this little game, constantly reminding Brian of his past with Vivian, even though he's moved on and married me. It's been wearing on me, and it feels like the last straw in dealing with her behavior. With our anniversary coming up, I wanted to do something special for Brian. I thought it would be a nice gesture to cook him a great meal, especially since he loves mother-in-law's dishes. I figured the best way to learn would be to have her teach me how to make it.

So, I invited her over, and she agreed to help me out. Brian was out for his golf lessons that morning, so it was just me and my mother-in-law in the kitchen. We were chatting while she taught me how to make the dish. But there was something off that I noticed during the cooking session. Throughout the entire time, she kept her phone in her hand, constantly texting someone. At first, I didn't think much of it maybe it was just a habit but then she went to the washroom and left her phone on the kitchen counter. As I continued to cook, I heard her phone ding a few times with incoming messages. Curiosity got the better of me, and I glanced at her phone.

When I saw who she was texting, my heart sank. It was Vivian. She was giving my mother-in-law instructions on how to cook the meal that we were making, along with advice on what ingredients to use. This is when I realized that mother-in-law had been texting Vivian throughout the entire cooking session, asking her questions about the recipe. I couldn't believe what I was seeing, and I froze in shock. When my mother-in-law came back from the washroom, I confronted her right away. I asked her why she was texting Vivian and if Brian knew about this. Her face went pale, and she immediately snatched the phone out of my hands, clearly flustered. She told me I had no right to go through her phone.

I didn't back down, though. I continued to press her on why she was still in contact with Vivian, especially after everything that had happened. I could feel the tension building, and it was hard to keep my composure, but I wasn't going to let this slide. It felt like a huge betrayal, especially since she had agreed to help me learn, and yet she was still so tied up with Vivian behind my back. Mother-in-law refused to admit that she was getting cooking instructions from Vivian, but I told her there was no point in lying since I had already seen their messages. After a lot of back and forth, she finally cracked and admitted that she had been in touch with Vivian

all along. She tried to brush it off, saying it wasn't a crime to talk to Brian's ex and that it wasn't a big deal. I could tell she was getting defensive and trying to make it seem like it was no big deal, but I knew something wasn't right. She tried to explain that she had just been double-checking the ingredients with Vivian to make sure everything was right. I pointed out that she had been cooking this exact meal every week and bringing it to our house for months. Why would she need Vivian's help for something she had been making regularly? That's when her face turned a bit red, and she finally admitted the truth. She confessed that the meals she had been bringing over weren't actually cooked by her they were cooked by Vivian. I was absolutely stunned. I couldn't

believe what I was hearing. Brian's ex had been cooking meals for him all this time, and I had no idea. I had always been under the impression that my mother-in-law was the one preparing them, and here she was admitting that she'd been sending over his ex's cooking all along. mother-in-law tried to justify herself by saying it didn't really matter in the end who cooked the meals as long as Brian was getting healthy food. She also pointed out how happy she was that I was finally inspired to learn Brian's favorite meal and that she was happy to teach me, just like Vivian had cooked for him, so he could continue having good food every day. At that point, I could feel my anger boiling up. How could she do this? She had been bringing these meals over, making it seem like she was doing something special for her.

son, when in reality, she had been outsourcing it all to Vivian. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Brian had always mentioned how familiar the meals tasted, and now I understood why. I was beyond furious at that point. With all the frustration and anger built up inside me, without thinking, I grabbed the entire cauldron of gravy that my mother-in-law had just helped me prepare and threw it straight into the bin. It felt like the only thing that could express how I was feeling in that moment. Then I yelled at her to get out of my house, to leave, and that I didn't want to see her face anymore. She tried to argue that I was overreacting and that I had no right to ask her to leave. She argued that Vivian always knew Brian's food tastes better than I did,

so instead of feeling bitter about it, I should just learn and be more like her. I was seething, but I took a deep breath and counted to ten in my mind. I looked her in the eyes and asked her again, this time in a calm but firm voice, to leave before I did something I would regret. Finally, mother-in-law left, grumbling all the way out. I felt like a weight had been lifted, but I was also shaken by what had just happened. Later, when Brian came back home, I told him everything, laid it all out, and he was just as shocked as I was. He couldn't believe his mom had been doing this behind our backs for so long. He tried to call mother-in-law to confront her, but she's so terrified now that she's refused to pick up his calls. She knows that I've told Brian everything,

and she's tried to text me saying that I'm an a-hole for exposing her. According to her, what she's been doing is completely acceptable, and I'm just making it a bigger deal than it is. It's exhausting, and I feel like I'm the one who's been made to look like the villain when I've just been trying to protect my relationship and set healthy boundaries. It's infuriating to me that she still doesn't see how wrong this is. She's so trapped in her own. She's so trapped in her way of thinking that she's refusing to acknowledge how hurtful and deceptive her actions have been. Instead of taking responsibility, she's trying to twist the situation and make it seem like I'm the problem. So Reddit IDA for being pissed that my mother-in-law has been making my husband's

ex cook for him all this while? Update 1. To answer a few of your questions, I honestly can't wrap my head around why Vivian would even agree to cook for my mother-in-law. Whether she's doing it out of the goodness of her heart or if my mother-in-law is paying her, I don't know. But what really bugs me is that, regardless of the reasons, she must know that the food she's making is ultimately for Brian. The whole thing just feels like some sort of scheme between them, and the fact that they've been playing me all this time is infuriating. They both must have known what they were doing, and it pisses me off that they've been pretending all this time that everything was fine, while secretly pulling the strings behind my back. Brian is absolutely.

furious. He can't believe his own mother would do something like this. He was so angry that he threw away all of the food she had brought over, saying that we're not taking any more of her meals. He told me that he never wants her to give us anything again. Honestly, I can't even blame him for his anger. It's got to feel like a total betrayal. Imagine finding out that your own mother, the person who's supposed to be on your side, has been working behind your back like this. It has to hurt. And while I'm mad at mother-in-law, I do feel bad for Brian, because this situation is forcing him to confront just how far his own mother is willing to go to manipulate things. It's like he's been blindsided by someone he thought he could trust completely. Both of us are on the same page

about confronting her face to face this weekend. We can't just let this go. She's been avoiding our calls because she knows she's in the wrong, and she's hoping that if she ignores it long enough, it'll all blow over. But we're not going to let that happen. We're planning to confront her head on, because she can't keep avoiding this forever. She needs to understand the consequences of what she's done. It's time for her to face the truth and stop hiding behind her cowardice. This is a boundary that can't be ignored anymore. Update 2, it's been a week since my last update. We finally confronted mother-in-law, and a lot of things came out during that conversation. It was honestly overwhelming, and I don't think either of us expected what she was going to say. First of all,

mother-in-law did admit shamelessly that she had always secretly hoped that Vivian and Brian would eventually get back together. She even went as far as saying that she thought they had always been each other's first true love, and that's why she had always been so invested in their relationship. According to her, after Brian told her about the message Vivian had sent him on Facebook, apologizing and saying she regretted their breakup, mother-in-law had reached out to her. That's when their secret communication started something I never even suspected was happening. Mother-in-law went on to say that Vivian still has lingering feelings for Brian, and that's why she agreed to cook for him when mother-in-law asked her to.

Vivian cooks the meals, and then mother-in-law goes to pick them up. She brings the food to our house and pretends like she's the one who's been cooking it all along. Brian started to yell at her, but Mother-in-law tried to defend herself by saying that she wasn't doing anything wrong, and that she was only doing this because of him. She claimed that I had ruined her attempt to bring true love together by exposing the whole thing to Brian. Mother-in-law kept going on about how a man's way to his heart is through his stomach, and how she was just trying to keep Vivian and Brian connected.

It was like she was living in some kind of delusional fantasy, and I couldn't believe what I was hearing. It felt like she wasn't even seeing me as a partner in Brian's life, but rather just someone standing in the way of what she wanted for him. I also asked mother-in-law why she always brings up Vivian in front of me and she begrudgingly admitted that even though she likes me, she has never really accepted me as her true daughter-in-law. In her own words, she has always used Vivian's name to make me feel inferior, to make me insecure so she could have some kind of control over me. I was honestly shocked to hear her say that so plainly. To think that she had been actively trying to manipulate my feelings like that, just so she could maintain some twisted sense of power,

was mind-boggling. It was like she saw me as a rival to her own fantasy of what Brian's life should look like, and she was willing to do anything to keep me in a position where I felt less then. Brian was beyond livid when he found out how much hate his mother has been harboring for me. He couldn't believe how deep this went, how his own mother had been treating me this way. Interestingly, while mother-in-law was fully aware of everything, Brian's father, F-I-L, had no clue about what was going on. He seemed pretty blindsided by the whole situation. Still, when the truth came out, Phil ended up supporting mother-in-law instead of Brian. That was kind of a breaking point for Brian he made it clear to both of his parents that he was going

low contact with them for the time being. He couldn't stand how mother-in-law had been undermining our marriage, and he needed space to process everything. It was heartbreaking, but I fully understood why he needed to set that boundary. I think it's for the best that Brian and I stay away from them for a while. Update 3, for those wondering if we decided to reach out to Vivian and get her side of the story, we did. After everything blew up with Mother and and I talked about it, and we decided it was important to hear from Vivian herself, especially since she had been such a big part of this whole mess. We reached out to her through my social media and gave her my number so she could call us. When she did, things were just as bad as we feared.

She confirmed everything. She admitted that she had been cooking the meals for Brian all this time, just like mother-in-law had been saying. She said that mother-in-law had been giving her hope all this time, making her think that there was still a chance for her and Brian to get back together in the future. She acted like she had been influenced by Mother-in-law's constant encouragement, which only added to the confusion. According to Vivian, Mother-in-law had told her that as long as Vivian kept pursuing him, he would eventually find his way back to her. Brian didn't hold back in the conversation. He made it absolutely clear to Vivian that everything she had been told was a lie.

He told her very firmly that he was happy with me, and that she needed to accept. that and move on. He also told her that she was making things harder by continuing to keep this hope alive, especially when it wasn't fair to anyone involved. Vivian, of course, tried to argue a little bit. At the end of the day, even though she is a grown woman, Vivian continued to tell us that she had become a pawn and mother-in-law's game, caught between wanting to make things right with Brian and mother-in-law's persistent manipulation. This obviously doesn't excuse her actions. It is still unsettling to know that she has been a part of all this, and had let it drag on for so long. Brian was resolute, though. He told her that it was time for all of us to

move forward and put this chapter behind us. After everything came to light, I also made sure to inform my parents. I didn't want to keep any more secrets, especially when it involved such a deeply personal issue. My mom was just as upset as I was. She actually had a conversation. She with my mother-in-law, and she was furious with her for crossing all those boundaries. She couldn't believe how far mother-in-law had gone to try and control Brian's life, and she let her know that it wasn't acceptable. Both of our families now agree that mother-in-law's behavior is seriously messed up. It's weird and manipulative to go to such lengths to try and influence Brian's decisions, especially when she should be respecting his marriage

and boundaries. It's just been such a betrayal of trust, and now it feels like all we can do is move forward without them being a part of our lives for a while. Update 4, it's been about four months since our last update, and things have been going so well for us. Brian and I have some exciting news to share, we're expecting. Yes, we're pregnant and we couldn't be happier. It feels like such a huge step forward in our lives, and it's brought us even closer together. We're both over the moon about this new chapter, and it's been such a wonderful, peaceful time for us as a couple. As for the situation with our in-laws, we're still no contact with them. After everything that happened, we decided it was the best decision for our mental and emotional well-being.

While it's been tough at times, we both agree that cutting them out was the right thing to do. Our relationship is thriving and we're focused on the future, especially with the baby on the way. We've created a space where we can be happy and secure, just the two of us, and we're excited about everything ahead. Interestingly, Vivian hasn't reached out to us at all after that conversation. We've had no contact from her, which honestly doesn't surprise me. After all the drama and everything that was exposed, I think she knows her place by now. It's been a relief not to have to deal with any of that drama anymore.