Reddit Stories - Secrets UNVEILED_ The Burden of Paying for EDUCATION Amidst Family STRUGGLES_

Episode Date: October 19, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #secretsunveiled #burdenofpayingforeducation #familystrugglesSummary:A gripping tale unravels as family secrets are revealed while navigating the challenges of paying for education. The burden of these revelations amidst family struggles creates a compelling narrative full of twists and turns.Tags:redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, secretsunveiled, burdenofpayingforeducation, familystruggles, educationcosts, familydynamics, financialstress, college, studentlife, tuitionfees, familysecrets, emotionaljourney, personalgrowth, relationships, unexpectedtwistsBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Father requested that I handle the payment for my secondary school fees due to their financial difficulties, yet was covertly utilizing my grandparents' funds to purchase extravagant presents for my stepmother. Siblings I, 16F, have attended private school all my life. My dad is an IT consultant and he does well for himself, so we could afford it. But recently, I was told by him and my stepmother Donna that I needed to switch to public school

because they could not afford the expensive tuition for my high school anymore. I do not want to switch schools, all my friends are here, and so I tried to talk them out of it, but they just told me that I got either the switch, or I would have to arrange my own tuition myself. And the second one is obviously impossible for me because I'm just 16. Even if I do manage to get a job, it's definitely only going to be part-time and that's not going to cover anything.

So I was obviously panicking about what to do because it's not like I could go to anybody else for money, I had spoken to my father about it already, but he had made it very clear that if I asked anybody else for money in the family, he would never speak to me again because that would be humiliating. I literally had no other way out of this. And I thought that I would have to drop out of my private school this year and switch to public school.

But thanks to my grandparents, that's not happening anymore. A few days back, I found out that my grandparents had actually been writing my father paychecks every month to support me financially, and he had been misusing that to provide a fancy, luxurious lifestyle for his stepkids. For context, my mom passed away when I was seven, but Donna's ex-husband is still well and alive. We were not happy together, though, so she filed for a divorce a couple of years ago and her children were not happy with her for that. When she started dating my dad and got remarried, her kids became even more distant from her, so I'm guessing that's why my dad and Donna have been spoiling her two kids,

so they will finally accept them. They are just buying their way into winning over her children, and I don't know who is more shallow in the situation, her kids, who are around my age and should know better, or Donna and my dad. And I found out about all of this, purely by coincidence. Last week, her kids had come over on Friday to stay for the weekend, and I noticed that on Friday, when they arrived, their bags were relatively light and didn't look very stuffed. But by Sunday night, after they had packed up to leave the next morning, their bags looked overstuffed. I know it's not right to go snooping through somebody else's belongings, but curiosity got the better of me and I had been curious about their lifestyle for a very long time. Anyway, while they were sleeping, I went through

their things, and I saw that they had packed bags and shoes in their duffel bags and I knew that it had to be for my dad and Donna because how else would they get their hands on stuff like this while staying here? They had been at home the entire time, no guests had come over, so it had to be them and I was totally shocked. Because on the one hand, they were telling me that they were facing financial problems, and on the other hand, they were giving such expensive gifts to Donna's kids. It just didn't add up, and I knew something because she was going on. So the next morning, right before they were about to leave, I confronted Donna's kids about the stuff in their bags.

At first, they hesitated to tell me, but then, the older brother told me that for the past few years, my dad and Donna have been giving them expensive gifts and he thinks it's probably to get them to accept my dad into the family and treat him like a father figure. And they do accept their gifts, but they have no intention of accepting my father as their dad too, because they already have a dad and they're not interested in playing happy family with another man. The guy thought that he was giving me a lecture about my dad and family values and stuff like, but I hardly cared about any of it. I just cared about the fact that my dad had lied to me. I had noticed that Donna's kids had a very different lifestyle from mine. They always

wore clothes from luxury brands, literally everything they owned was branded, and they always seemed to have a bunch of cash on them. Before speaking with them, I used to think that it was their father, but as it turns out, it was probably my father. I was furious after speaking to them, so that day itself, I went over to my maternal grandparents' place and told them everything, and that's when I found out from them that they had actually been writing checks to my father ever since my mom passed away, but I guess only recently did he start using those checks for anything other than me. They were equally as furious as me, and after discussing it with them, I decided to move in with them for a couple of weeks until all of this had been sorted out.

But now, I think I'm going to have to stay here indefinitely because my grandparents spoke to my dad. My dad got defensive and I don't know what exactly they spoke about, but it was clear that there was a big fight, and now. My dad and Donna are panicking and texting me to get my grandparents to stop because they have been sent a legal notice by my grandparents accusing them of misappropriation of funds. And my grandparents are well within their rights to sue them for it because apparently, there had been some sort of contract that had been signed when I was younger, and unfortunately for my grandparents. my dad, it was actually he who had suggested it. The contract says that my grandparents will continue to support me financially and help out my dad until I graduate from college, and that's what they had been doing. But my dad did not hold up his end of the deal, so it's fair enough that he's being sued. But at the same time, my dad has been texting me, telling me that he's planning on starting

his own business in a couple of months. He needs to save up money and he cannot afford to go after a lawyer and fight with my grandparents at the moment of something so petty, so I need to do something to call it off. And I can tell that he's really panic-stricken about it. He's been requesting me to do something and has been telling me to come back so we can talk it out, but I really don't feel like doing it because it all just seems very unfair to me. So Ida for setting my grandparents after my father? Hey, thank you, everyone, for all the comments and support. Things have been very difficult for me emotionally recently, so I really needed that. The situation in my family is at an all-time low, and I feel very responsible for it, but honestly, I know that I'm doing the right thing and that's

what matters. My paternal grandparents called me up a couple of days ago, told me that I was ungrateful, said that I was being brady and selfish, and then blocked me everywhere. So make of that what you will, and I know that my dad's side of the family all think this way. They think that I'm being selfish and entitled, they don't understand that my dad had literally been using the funds that my grandparents had been sending him to win over his stepkids instead of supporting me financially, which is what the money had originally been meant for. I don't even know if my dad's side of the family knows the whole truth, or if they just want to come after me and make me feel bad for standing up for myself. In the past few days, I have spoken to my grandparents at length about

the situation. I have told them how bad I feel about it, but they have only told me that none of this would have happened if my dad had just been up front and honest about everything. He was the one who put me in a difficult position first, by telling me to arrange my high school tuition for myself, knowing fully well that it would be impossible for me to do so, and I would eventually have to switch to public school. And he was willing to sacrifice my education for the sake of his kids and from what we know,

my dad could have bought them the moon, and they still wouldn't have accepted him into their family, so I don't even know what he was acting so needy for. Anyway, the bottom line is that he did not feel bad for manipulating me, lying to me, and taking away the money that rightfully belongs to me so I shouldn't feel bad about anything that I'm doing now. In fact, I'm barely even doing anything. It's all my grandparents who are dealing with the legal side of things. So I just need to chill out, and that's what I'm trying to do. And since I'm discussing the legal aspect of things, anyway, I learned a lot about it over the past

couple of days from my grandparents. Apparently, after my mom passed away, my dad had been struggling with work because he was depressed, and he had been fired from his job. Naturally, that made it very difficult for him to take care of me because, at that point, he was only in his mid-20s and didn't have much saved. So that's when my grandparents decided to step in for a few months, until he was back on his feet. But then, my dad insisted that financial help from them would make things much easier for him, and he would really appreciate it if they could commit to it long term, even after he got back on his feet. He promised them that the money would only be used for me, and whatever was left over every month would go into a savings account for me that I could dip into any time

that I wanted to in the future. He said that this is exactly what my mother would have wanted as well, and since they were in a position to help, my grandparents agreed to it, and my dad got the lawyers involved, had a contract drawn up, which my grandparents thought was a bit unnecessary, but now, they are glad for it. Because thanks to that contract, they can sue my father for not sticking to their agreement because clearly, he had been dipping into the savings. I had no idea about any of this for the past 16 years,

but I guess that was a good reason because I don't think my grandparents or my dad would have wanted me to know about this. But now, I'm glad that I know, because it's making things much easier for me, I don't feel as guilty. I don't understand why my father couldn't have just raised me to the best of his capabilities like a lot of other single parents.

I don't understand why he had to go out and demand help from my maternal grandparents, but it gave me the life that I'm used to, so I can't complain. I don't think I'll ever understand his reasons for anything, and I have stopped trying as well because it just messes with my head a lot. I'm just trying to focus on school right now, because in my personal life, everything is a total mess, and the more that I think about it, the worse I end up feeling. So I guess I'll just have to try and change.

out, like I said. Update 2 OK, so it's been two weeks since I left home and since then, I have been staying with my grandparents. After the first few days, I blocked my dad, because he had been texting me relentlessly, trying to get me to feel guilty so I would talk to my grandparents and get them to back off with the lawyers and stuff. But after a while, it got really old, and I knew that if I did not block him, he would just keep trying to guilt-trip me, and eventually he might succeed, so, I didn't want that and that's why I blocked him. It's not like I didn't miss him, of course I did, but I had to do what was good for me. Also, after what his parents said to me, calling me selfish and entitled, and whatnot, I don't think I wanted to have anything to do with

that side of the family right now. And so, for the past week and a half, I haven't had any contact with my father. But today, he finally reached out to me once again. He called me up for from a burner phone, so I couldn't recognize the number, and when I picked up, I heard his voice, and I immediately thought about hanging up, but then, he told me not to do so, probably because he was aware of the situation being so bad that I wouldn't even want to talk to him. Anyway, he did most of the talking. He told me that he was really sorry about everything. He said that he knew that he had failed me and that he hadn't been prioritizing me, but he just wanted me to come back home so we could sort things out. He didn't even care about the lawyers.

He could pay back all the money that he spent over the years on his stepkids and he would make sure that the calculations were all verified by my grandparents and their lawyer, so it would be a very transparent transaction. He was ready to do all that it took, but all he wanted was for me to come back because he really missed me and at that part, he started crying. I could tell that he was being sincere about everything, and it was difficult for me, but through tears, I had to tell him that I really needed some space and time away from him to sort out how I felt about this entire situation. Of course, all of this has been a huge betrayal to me, I feel terrible about it, and it's not that easy for me to just forget about it and pretend like everything is fine, so I can forgive him and move on and go back to staying with him. I thought that he was going to get defensive or maybe he was going to argue with me about it or something, but instead, he just told me that he could understand what he had put

me through. When he was really sorry about it, he had lost sight of what was important, and he had ended up spending way too much time, energy, and money on kids that were not his, instead of prioritizing the one child that was actually his flesh and blood and there was nothing in the world that was more disappointing to him than that. So instead of fighting with me on that, he actually validated my decision and said that if he had been in my place, he would probably feel the same way and he understands and respects my need to stay away from him at the moment. That was sad, but before he was about to hang up, I told him that the one thing that he could do for me was come to a settlement with my

grandparents because, like he had said, he was willing to return all the money and have a very transparent transaction process verified by the lawyer and stuff. That would put an end to all of this, and I think that's what I really wanted, for things to be sorted out in my family. So this was something that he could do for me, and I asked him, once again, I thought he was going to decline, but he told me that he had been planning on coming to a settlement anyway, because he knew that he was wrong, and he didn't want to waste more money on lawsuit where he knew he had messed up anymore. And that was good news, but until he actually makes a move to back off, I'm not going to tell anybody anything because I don't want to get ahead of myself.

However, after that conversation, I did unblock my father. I don't know how to feel about the situation at the moment, but the truth is that I really do miss him. He is the only parent I have left, and I know that he has messed up in the past few years, but before that, he used to be the most amazing father, and even in the past few years, apart from the whole financial situation, he has been there for me emotionally at all times. I know it sounds ridiculous,

but currently, I'm actually really confused about what to do regarding the situation with my father because I know that most people would say that I shouldn't forgive him and that I should never talk to him again and stuff but then again, that's not how I feel. I have thought about it,

and I really do want my father in my life, but I'm not sure if forgiving him right now is the right thing to do. Especially after that phone call, I'm just even more of a mess than I was before. Hey, so it's been a few days since I posted last, and since then, there have been a lot of opinions in the comment section. A lot of opinions regarding whether I should forgive my father, whether I should reconnect

with him or whatever, and all I have to say to that, I really value all the advice that people have for me, but I think this is something that I have to deal with on my own. After all, I am just 16, I don't think that even if I do make a decision right now, I'll be able to stick to it for the rest of my life. Besides, that's a huge part of the thing as well, I have my whole life ahead of me and while I can deal with not having my father involved in my life at the moment, I don't think I'm going to be fine with that in the long run. Because like I said, when I was a kid, he was both my mom and dad and he did a fantastic job at being a single parent. Never even once did he allow me to feel like I was not a priority for him. Things only got

messed up recently. It was only after his marriage that he started acting a bit differently, but even then, he tried his best to be there for me and that's why I was so skeptical about whatever I was doing in the beginning. If he hadn't been a good father, at any point of time, I don't think I would have felt bad about what I was doing at any point either. And that's the point that I'm trying to get across. I know that he messed up, and I know that he messed up in a pretty big way, but I also know that he's apologetic for it right now. Because what we're within a couple of days of my last phone call with him, my grandparents told me that my father was backing out of the whole lawsuit thing. He was not fighting anymore and was willing to come to a

settlement with them and was going to be transparent about everything. And then, I told my grandparents about the phone call. Now, I knew that he was going to do exactly what he had said he would do. And after I spoke to my grandparents, I also told them how I felt about the situation with my dad, and that while I love my grandparents, I also love my father. They also seem to understand where I was coming from. But they warned me that right now, things are very tense and I might want to take some time to think about what I want to do, and then come to a decision about whether I want to forgive my father or not. But whatever I decide, my grandparents have told me that they are going to stand by my side and try their best to accept it, even though they have lost their trust and

respect for my dad permanently after everything. But in spite of that, if I wanted to forgive him and let him be a part of my life again, they wouldn't oppose it. And even though I haven't made a decision yet about whether I want to forgive him right now or not, I feel happy, knowing that at least whatever I decide, my grandparents are going to stand by my side. And as long as they respect and accept my decision, I don't care what anybody else thinks. Of course, I'm not stupid, I am aware of the fact that no matter what happens later, things will never be the same between me and my dad ever again. Because of the things that I have found out about him recently, I don't think I can let myself forget about it easily. And the situation

between his family and me has gotten so bad, I'm pretty sure that I'm not going to forgive my paternal grandparents any time soon. Neither am I interested in speaking to them, but my dad is a different story altogether. To be honest, things are just complicated between us right now. I don't know what to make of it. I don't even know if I would do the right thing if I decided to forgive him. The situation is messy, weird, and I've just never been in a place like this before, especially not with my family. I don't know how to deal with it. I don't know how to deal with the confusion regarding how I feel about my dad right now. I just don't know what to do. If I do decide to forgive him at any point, I'm pretty sure that we are going to need therapy

because otherwise, I don't really know how we are going to be able to work this out. I know that he asked me to come back, but I don't see that happening anytime soon either. I'm lucky enough to have rich grandparents who could afford to fight for me, but had that not happened, I couldn't even imagine the situation that I would be in right now. And it might even get worse with him, and he would have been ready to put me through it, had my grandparents not been able to fight for me. So knowing that, it changes everything, but currently, at the moment, I know that he's trying to resolve things. I know it seems like I'm just talking in circles at the moment, defending and blaming my father within a few lines, but honestly, that's how things have been in my brain for the past few days. That's how confused I am, so I'm just trying to put it out the best way that I can.

Anyway, I think I've spoken about it enough, I need a break, and I don't think I'll be posting for the next couple of weeks until I've been able to come to a decision about what I want to do about everything. Update 4, hey, so it's been three weeks since my last update and like I said, I wouldn't be posting until I decided what I wanted to do. And I have, I have made up my mind finally, and I don't think I'm going to be letting my father be involved in my life in the same capacity once again. It was very difficult for me to come to this decision because for the past three weeks, I had been in touch with my father on and off. He was trying desperately to get me to forgive him, and I really wanted to, but in the back of my mind, I was. I still had my doubts about him.

And after a while, I figured out that if I still had reservations about him, it would be stupid of me to go back to stay with him or forgive him and pretend that everything was fine. Because at the end of the day, I knew that everything was not fine. Everything will never be fine again because of the things that he has done. And I cannot pretend otherwise, I just can't do it. So the best thing for me to do was to stay with my grandparents, and they have told me that I'm welcome to stay with them for as long as I want to. They don't have a problem with it,

and in fact, it makes them happy. I know that my dad would love to have me back again, but that's not what I want or need right now. So I reached out to him myself today, and I told him what I had been thinking. I said that after everything that had happened, it would be very difficult for me to bring myself to him again. And if we were living in the same house once again, it would probably end up feeling very weird about it. Especially with Donna around, knowing that she was a part of the whole thing, and throughout the past few weeks, she had never bothered to reach out to me and apologize because I think she knew what she was doing. But she didn't feel sorry about it. My dad tried to correct me at that point. He tried to tell me that she did feel bad and had thought about

contacting me but then decided against it because that would probably make things worse. But that did not make a difference to me because in the end of the day, she didn't even try. whether it would have made things worse or better should have been left up to me. The bottom line is that she did not even try, and it did make me a bit upset because I had always been nice to Donna. We had had a normal relationship and obviously, I did not look at her as my mother, but I did give her the respect that she deserved in the family and accepted her. So an apology was the least I could have expected from her, especially after the way she and my father had screwed me over. Anyway, she hadn't apologized, and after everything that had happened,

didn't want to go back to living with him. At least not right now, so I was going to continue staying with my parents and soon enough, I would be heading out to college, so either way, I would have to leave. He sounded very disappointed at that point, but he accepted my decision, and he told me that if that's what I wanted, then he was fine with that. And then he told me that he knew that he had lost the right to ask anything of me, but he still wanted to request me to at least keep in touch and meet him occasionally. Because he was really sorry about it. everything that has happened, everything that has gone wrong and he knows that there is not much that he can do to put it right with me emotionally but he wants to try at the very least.

It took me a few minutes to think about it, but then I told him that I was ready to keep in touch, see him occasionally, but I also wanted us to go to therapy and try to work things out with a professional in the room because I think that we really needed that. He agreed to it, but I think given the state that he was in, he would have agreed to everything I asked of him at that point. Anyway, I've started looking for family therapists now, and we're going to try it out. We are going to meet once a week with a therapist, try to make phone calls twice a week at least and just try to sort things out. My grandparents are also happy with this arrangement, and maybe hopefully, in the future, everything will be fine once again, but right now,

I just want to focus on my own mental health.