Reddit Stories - Sibling left me and CONTACTED Child PROTECTIVE Services FOLLOWING the deaths of our

Episode Date: July 21, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #siblings #cps #family #loss #conflictSummary: My sibling left me and CONTACTED Child Protective Services FOLLOWING the deaths of our parents. I am torn between feeling betrayed and understanding their actions during such a difficult time.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, siblings, cps, family, loss, conflict, betrayal, understanding, difficult time, relationships, siblings conflict, family dynamics, grief, support, communication, trust, emotional turmoilBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Sibling left me and contacted child protective services following the deaths of our guardians because her spouse demanded she not provide me shelter, threatening to end their relationship. Time passed, and she reappeared expecting a child. Homeless after he cheated on her. Six years ago, when I was 16, my parents died in a car accident. It was sudden and horrible, and I don't want to get into all that because it still hurts too much to think. think about the details. What matters is that after the funeral, I had nowhere to go, and my sister Haley, who was 28 at the time and married, was the only family I had left that could

take me in. I remember sitting in the lawyer's office after everything was settled with the will and insurance and all that legal stuff. Haley was there with her husband, Mark, and I just assumed that I would go live with them because where else was I supposed to go? They were my only family. The lawyer was talking about guardianship papers, and Haley kept looking at Mark, and Mark kept shaking his head and making these faces like he smelled something bad. I didn't understand what was happening at first because I was still in shock about everything. Then Haley pulled me aside after the meeting and told me that she couldn't take me in because Mark didn't want kids in the house, and they weren't ready for that kind of responsibility. She said she was sorry, but she thought it would be better if I went into the system. Just like that.

She called CPS herself and told them I needed a foster placement because she couldn't care for me. I remember standing there thinking this had to be some kind of mistake because who does that to their own sibling. I asked her if we could talk about it more and maybe Mark would change his mind if we explained that I wasn't going to be a problem and I could get a job and help with expenses and I wouldn't get in their way. But she just kept saying that Mark was firm on his decision and she had to respect her husband's

wishes. She kept calling him her husband like that made everything okay, like being married to someone meant more than being related to someone by blood. The CPS worker came to collect me from Haley's house where I had been staying for exactly three days after the funeral. She kept asking Haley if she was sure about this decision, and Haley just kept nodding and saying yes, she was sure. Mark stood behind her the whole time with his arms crossed, looking relieved that I was leaving. I had two trash bags of my stuff because that's all I could fit for my old room at my parents' house, and Haley didn't even help me carry them to the car. Foster care was exactly as bad as you think it would be, and I'm not going to go into all the details because this isn't

about that. But I aged out at 18 with basically nothing and had to figure out how to be an adult with no family support and no safety net. I worked two jobs through community college and then transferred to a state school where I worked in the dining hall and took out loans for everything else. Somehow I managed to graduate with a degree. Now I'm 22, and I have my own apartment and a decent job at a small firm. I'm not rich, but I'm stable, and I've built a life for myself that I'm proud of, even though it was hard as hell to get here. I don't talk to Haley much, maybe a text on birthdays and holidays, but that's about it. Honestly, I prefer it that way. I prefer it that way. I'm because seeing her name on my phone still makes me feel sick.

Last week, Haley called me crying, and I mean really crying like she could barely get words out. At first I thought something terrible had happened, like someone died or she got hurt. She was sobbing and saying she needed help and she didn't have anywhere else to turn, and I was trying to calm her down enough to understand what was going on. Finally, she managed to tell me that Mark had cheated on her and left her,

and she was pregnant and due in two months, and she had no money and nowhere to go. Apparently, Mark had been having an affair with someone from his work for months, and when Haley found out and confronted him, he just packed his stuff and moved in with the other woman. He told Haley he never wanted to be a father anyway and the baby wasn't his problem anymore, and he was filing for divorce. Haley had been a stay-at-home wife for their whole marriage, so she had no job and no recent work experience, and Mark had cleaned up. out their joint accounts before he left. She was asking if she could stay with me just until the

baby was born and she could figure out what to do next. She promised she wouldn't be any trouble and she'd help with groceries and cleaning, and she just needed somewhere safe to have her baby. She was crying the whole time she was telling me this, and I felt bad for her because being abandoned while pregnant sounds awful. But then I remembered standing in that CPS office and watching her sign papers to give me away. I told her no. Just no, I can't help you. She got quiet for a minute and then started asking why not and saying she's my sister and family helps family and where else was she supposed to go. I wanted to laugh because family helps family really. That's what she was going with after what she did to me. But I just told her that

she made her choice six years ago when she chose her husband over her brother, and now she had to live with the consequences. She started crying harder and saying that was different because I was just a kid and kids are resilient and I would be fine in foster care, but this was different because she was an adult with a baby and she couldn't just bounce back from this. That made me so angry I started yelling at her through the phone, telling her that being a kid made it worse, not better, and that I wasn't resilient. I was traumatized and abandoned by the only family I had left. Haley kept saying she was sorry and she knew she made a mistake, but she couldn't change the past and she needed help now, and I was the only person she could turn to. She said Mark had isolated her from all her

friends over the years and she didn't have anyone else, and our parents were dead, so it was just us and we needed to stick together. I told her that we stopped being family the day she called CPS and hung up on her. She's been calling and texting ever since, but I'm not answering because I don't have anything else to say to her. Honestly, I don't trust myself not to say something really cruel if I talk to her again right now. My co-worker knows some of my background, and when I told her what happened, she said I should help Haley because she's pregnant and vulnerable and sometimes people make bad decisions when they're young and married and under pressure from their spouse. My co-worker thinks I should give Haley a chance to make things right and that

helping her would be the bigger person thing to do. But I keep thinking about those. three days I spent at Haley's house after our parents died and how Mark would leave the room whenever I walked in and how Haley would apologize for him and say he just needed time to adjust to the idea of having me there. I remember thinking that if I could just be perfect and quiet and helpful, then maybe they would change their minds and let me stay. But it didn't matter what I did because Mark had already decided he didn't want me there. I don't know if I'm being petty or justified, and I don't know if I should feel guilty for

turning away a pregnant woman who happens to be my sister. I keep going back and forth between thinking she deserves this and thinking that two wrongs don't make a right. So I'd offer refusing to help my sister who called CPS on me when I was a minor and now wants my help because her husband left her pregnant and broke. Update 1. I've been reading all the comments and messages, and honestly, it's been overwhelming and a good way to know that I'm not crazy for feeling the way I do about this situation. A lot of you shared your own stories about foster care and family abandonment, and it makes me feel less alone, even though I wish none of us had to go through this stuff. Haley has not stopped calling and texting, and yesterday she showed up at my apartment

building, which I did not expect and honestly kind of freaked me out because I never gave her my address. She must have gotten it from someone or looked it up somehow, and that feels like a violation of boundaries, but I guess that's just how desperate she is right now. I was coming home from work around 6 p.m., and there she was, sitting on the steps outside my building. She looked terrible, like she hadn't been sleeping or eating properly. She's really showing now, and seeing her pregnant made this whole thing feel more real in a way that talking on the phone didn't. She stood up when she saw me and started walking over, and I almost turned around and left, but then I thought that was stupid because this is my building in my home, and I shouldn't have to run away.

She started talking immediately before I could even say anything, telling me she'd been staying in her car for the past few nights because she couldn't afford a hotel anymore and she was scared something would happen to the baby if she kept sleeping in the car. She said she went to a women's shelter, but they were full and she was on a waiting list, but it could be weeks before they had space for her. I asked her what happened to their house, and she said Mark put it up for sale before he left, and since both their names were on the mortgage, she couldn't stop him. The realtor told her she had to be out by the end of this week. All their stuff was in storage except for what she could fit in her car, and she'd been living off fast food and sleeping in parking lots. She looked like hell.

Haley kept saying please over and over and reaching out like she wanted to grab my arm but not quite touching me, and I could see she was crying but trying not to let me see it. She said she knew she didn't deserve my help after what she did, but she wasn't asking for herself, she was asking for her baby who didn't do anything wrong and didn't deserve to be born in a car or a shelter. That got to me more than I want to admit because she's right, the baby didn't do anything wrong.

But then again, neither did I when I was 16 and needed help. I told her that, and she said she knew and she was sorry and she'd been thinking about what she did every day since Mark left because now she understood what it felt like to have nowhere to go and no one to turn to. She said Mark had convinced her back then that I would be better off in the system because they had resources and programs to help kids like me, and that keeping me would just be enabling me to be dependent instead of learning to be independent. She said she believed him because she was young and stupid and wanted to keep her marriage

happy, and she thought I would understand when I was older. I asked her if she really believed that or if she was just saying it now because she needed something from me. She got quiet for a long time and then admitted that she knew it was wrong even then, but she was scared of Mark leaving her if she insisted on taking me in. She said he had threatened to divorce her if she became my guardian, and she couldn't handle losing her husband and her parents all at the same time. That made me so angry I started yelling at her right there on the street, and I don't care who heard me because I was done pretending to be calm about this. I told her that she chose a man who threatened to leave her overtaking care of her own brother, and now that same man had left her anyway, so what was the

point of sacrificing me for a marriage that didn't even last? Haley just stood there crying while I yelled, and she didn't try to defend herself or make excuses. She just kept saying, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, like that would fix anything. Finally, I ran out of things to yell, and we just stood there looking at each other, and I could see how much weight she'd lost everywhere except her belly and how scared she looked. I told her I needed time to think, and she said she didn't have time, she had to be out by Friday, and it was already Tuesday. I said that wasn't my problem, and she nodded and said she knew, but asked if she could give me her new phone number since she had to cancel her old plan and she was using a prepaid phone now.

She wrote the number on a piece of paper and handed it to me and said she'd be at the McDonald's on 5th Street tomorrow night if I wanted to talk more because they were open 24 hours and she could charge her phone there. Then she walked back to this beat-up Honda Civic that I guess was where she'd been sleeping and drove away. I went upstairs to my apartment and immediately called my friend Nathan, who I've known since Community College, and told him everything that had happened. Nathan knows my whole story because we've been friends for years, and he's one of the few people I trust completely. He listened to everything and then said he thought Haley was getting what she deserved, but that didn't mean I had to let her suffer just to prove a point. He said if I wanted to help her, I should do it because I wanted to help, not because she was family or because I felt guilty. He also said if I didn't want to help her, that was valid too, and I shouldn't let anyone guilt me into doing something I wasn't comfortable with. Nathan always gives good advice because he doesn't try to tell me what to do, he just helps me figure out what I actually want to do.

I spent all last night thinking about it, and I keep coming back to the baby because that's really what this is about now. Haley made her choice six years ago, and she's living with the consequences of that choice, but her baby didn't make any choices and doesn't deserve to pay for Haley's mistakes. At the same time, I keep thinking about what message it sends if I help her now. Does that mean what she did to me was okay because family forgives everything in the end? I don't want to forgive her, and I don't think I should have to forgive her just because she's in trouble now. I'm probably going to go to that McDonald's and talk to her again because I need to understand more about her situation and what exactly she's asking for me before I make any decisions. I'm not saying I'm going to help her, but I think I need more information to make the right choice for me. I'll update again after I talk to her, assuming she's a little bit.

actually there and this isn't some manipulation to get me to feel sorry for her. I still don't trust her completely because abandoning your family kind of breaks that trust forever, but I want to hear what she has to say. Edit 1. Some of you in the comments asked why she can't get government assistance or help from social services, and I asked her that yesterday. She said she applied for everything she could think of, but most programs have waiting lists, and the emergency assistance she got will only cover a few more days in a hotel. She's trying to get a job, but she's eight months pregnant, and most places won't hire someone who's about to take maternity leave.

Update 2. Well, I went to McDonald's last night, and Haley was there just like she said she would be, sitting in a corner booth with her phone plugged into the wall and a cup of coffee that looked like she'd been nursing it for hours. She saw me come in and waved but didn't get up, and I could tell she was trying not to seem too eager or desperate, even though we both knew she was both of those things. I got myself a coffee and sat across from her, and we just looked at each other for a minute, not knowing how to start this conversation. She looks even worse up close, and I could see she'd been crying a lot

because her eyes were all puffy and red. Her clothes don't fit right anymore because of the pregnancy, and she's wearing this oversized hoodie that probably belonged to Mark. Finally, I asked her to explain exactly what she needed for me and for how long because I wasn't making any decisions without knowing all the details. She said she needed a place to stay until the baby was born and maybe a few weeks after that while she recovered and figured out her next steps. She was hoping to get into subsidized housing, but the waiting list was long, and she needed an address to receive mail and benefits. Haley said she would sleep on my couch and wouldn't expect me to provide food or anything else, just a roof over her head and access to a bathroom and shower.

She promised she wouldn't bring any drama into my life and wouldn't have people over and would respect any rules I set. She also said she would do chores and cooking to earn her keep and wouldn't just be a burden sitting around waiting for me to take care of her. I asked her what would happen after the baby was born and she got back on her feet and she said she didn't know, but she hoped we could rebuild some kind of relationship as siblings. She said losing Mark made her realize that she'd thrown away the only real family she had left for someone who never really loved her anyway, and she wanted to try to fix what she broke between us. That annoyed me because it sounded like she only cared about rebuilding our relationship now that she had no one else, and I told her

that. She admitted that was probably true but said sometimes it takes losing everything to realize is what actually matters, and she was hoping it wasn't too late to matter to me again. I asked her why she really chose Mark over me back then and if she was being honest about his threats to leave her. She was quiet for a long time and then said it wasn't just about Mark threatening divorce, it was also about her being scared of raising a teenager when she had no idea what she was doing. She said our parents never taught her how to be responsible for someone else, and she was terrified of screwing up my life even more than it already was screwed up.

Haley said Mark made it easy to choose him because he gave her an excuse to avoid taking responsibility for me when she was already overwhelmed by grief and fear. She said she convinced herself that foster care would be better for me because the system had trained professionals who knew how to help kids deal with trauma and loss. I told her that was bullshit because she could have learned how to help me, and we could have figured it out together, but instead she took the easy way out and abandoned me when I needed her most.

She agreed that it was bullshit and said she'd been living with the guilt of that choice every day since then, but especially since Mark left, because now she knew what it felt like to be thrown away by someone you trusted. We talked for over two hours, and I learned more about Haley's marriage than I ever wanted to know. Apparently, Mark was controlling and manipulative and slowly isolated her from everyone she used to be close with, including some friends from high school and college who might have helped her now if she hadn't cut them off years ago because Mark didn't like them. He convinced her to quit her job after they got married because he said he made enough money for both of them and he wanted her to focus on being a good wife.

Then he used the fact that she didn't work as a weapon against her whenever they fought, telling her she was useless and couldn't survive without him. When she brought up having kids, he would shut down the conversation and say they weren't ready financially, even though they definitely were. Haley said she started wanting kids more as she got older, but Mark kept making excuses and putting it off, and she was starting to think it would never happen. Then she got pregnant by accident, and when she told Mark, he was furious and accused her of doing it on purpose to trap him. He demanded she get an abortion, and when she refused, he started treating her like she was his enemy instead of his wife. She said the affair started after she told him about the pregnancy, and she thought he did it specifically to hurt her and give himself an excuse to leave. He told her the other woman was younger and not desperate to

have babies and would never try to tie him down the way Haley did. I asked her if she thought any of this justified what she did to me, and she said no, absolutely not, and she wasn't trying to make excuses, just trying to help me understand how she got to that point. She said Mark didn't force her to call CPS, he just made it clear that choosing me meant losing him, and she made the wrong choice because she was weak and selfish and scared. Haley started crying again and said she knew I had every right to hate her and never forgive her, but she was asking me to help her anyway because she didn't have anywhere else to turn. She said she wasn't asking me to forgive her or forget what she did, just asking me to be a better person than she was when I was the one who

needed help. That hit me hard because it was exactly what I'd been struggling with this whole time. Do I help her because it's the right thing to do, or do I let her face the consequences of her choices alone? She was right that helping her would make me a better person than she was, but I didn't know if I wanted to be a better person or if I wanted her to suffer the way I suffered. I told her I needed more time to think, and she said she understood but reminded me that she was living in her car full time. She gave me the key to a storage unit where her stuff was and said if something happened to her, I should sell everything and keep them. money as payment for all the birthdays and holidays and graduations she missed. That made me start crying, which I did not expect and definitely didn't want to do in front of her, but thinking about her dying in childbirth and the back of a Honda Civic just broke something inside me.

Haley reached across the table and touched my hand and said she was sorry for putting me in this position and she knew it wasn't fair to ask this of me after what she did. I pulled my hand away because I wasn't ready for physical comfort from her yet, but I told her I would give her an answer by today. She nodded and said, thank you for even considering it, and that no matter what I decided, she wanted me to know that she was proud of the man I'd become despite having no help from her. I left the McDonald's feeling more confused than when I went in because talking to her made her seem more human and less like the villain I'd been carrying around in my head for six years. She was still the person who abandoned me, but she was also a scared

pregnant woman with nowhere to go, and I didn't know how to reconcile those two things. I called Nathan again when I got home and told him everything we talked about. He said it sounded like Haley had genuinely reflected on what she did and understood how wrong it was, but that didn't erase the harm she caused me. He said the question wasn't whether she deserved my help, the question was whether helping her serve my own interests and values. Nathan reminded me that I'd always said I wanted to be the kind of person who helps others when I can, and that maybe this was a chance to prove that to myself. He also said that if I helped her and it went badly, I could always ask her to leave, and I'd

still know that I tried to do the right thing. I've been thinking about that all morning, and I think he's right that this is more about who I want to be than about what Haley deserves. I keep imagining her baby being born in a car or a shelter, and I can't live with that image, even if Haley brought it on herself. I'm going to call her in an hour and tell her she can stay with me until the baby is born and for two weeks after that. I'm going to set strict boundaries about what I expect from her and what will happen if she violates my trust again. This doesn't mean I forgive her, and it doesn't mean we're family again, it just means I'm choosing to help because that's who I want to be. I'll update again

once she moves in and I see how this actually goes in practice because making this decision and living with it are probably going to be very different things. Small update. Quick update. because some people have been asking about Haley's financial situation and why she can't get money from Mark. In simple words, he cleaned out all the accounts Haley had access to, and the divorce is ongoing and will take a good while to conclude. Update 3. Haley has been staying with me for five days now, and it's been weird and tense and surprisingly okay all at the same time, which I did not expect when I made the decision to let her crash on my couch. I thought it would be horrible and awkward every minute, but it's actually been more normal than I thought it would be.

Maybe that's because we're both adults now instead of her being an adult and me being a traumatized kid. She's been keeping her promise about staying out of my way and doing chores around the apartment. When I come home from work, she's usually cleaned something or started dinner, and she always asks if it's okay before she does anything like use the washing machine or take a shower. It's almost like she's a polite roommate who happens to be my estranged sister instead of the family member who abandoned me. The first night was the hardest because I kept waking up and remembering she was there and feeling angry about it, even though I was the one who chose to help her. Haley tries to make conversation during dinner, but she doesn't push it when I'm not in the mood to talk. She tells me

about doctor appointments and baby preparations and asks if I need anything from the store when she goes out, but she doesn't try to act like we're close or like everything is fine between us. I appreciate that because I'm not ready to pretend this is a normal sibling relationship. Yesterday she had a doctor appointment and asked if I would drive her because taking the bus while this pregnant was getting difficult for her. I said yes because it seemed like a reasonable request, and the doctor's office was only 15 minutes from my apartment. The appointment went fine, and the baby was healthy and on track to be born in about three weeks. While we were in the waiting room, Haley pointed to a poster about postpartum depression

and asked if I thought she would be a good mother given how she handled being responsible for me. That caught me off guard because I hadn't really thought about her as a future mother, just as my sister who needed temporary help. I told her honestly that I didn't know because being a mother was different from being a guardian to your teenage brother, but that she seemed to care about doing right by her baby, which was more than she did for me. She nodded and said she'd been thinking about that a lot and wondering if having her own child would help her understand how badly she failed me.

Haley said she'd been reading parenting books and taking online classes about newborn care because she wanted to be prepared this time instead of running away when things got hard. She said Mark never wanted to talk about parenting or baby preparations, and she realized now that she should have seen that as a red flag about what kind of father he would be. We don't talk about Mark much, but when his name comes up, Haley doesn't defend him or make excuses for him anymore. She calls him her ex-husband even though they're not divorced yet and refers to the other woman as his girlfriend without any bitterness, just like she's stating facts. I think she's really done with him emotionally, which is probably healthy. The baby has been moving around a lot, and sometimes Haley will wince or put her hand on her belly, and I can see the outline of little feet or hands pressing.

against her skin. It's strange to think that in a few weeks there will be a whole new person in my apartment who is technically my nephew or niece, even though I don't feel connected to them yet. Haley asked if I wanted to feel the baby kick, and I said no because that felt too intimate and family-like for where we are right now and rebuilding whatever relationship we might have. She seemed disappointed but didn't argue or try to convince me, which I appreciated because respecting my boundaries is important if this is going to work. Haley seems to understand that I'm not ready to bond with her or act like we're close, and she doesn't push for heart-to-heart conversations or try to reminisce about our childhood.

She stays focused on practical things like doctor appointments and preparing for the baby and finding a place to live after she recovers from giving birth. She's been applying for apartments and looking into child care options and government assistance programs so she can support herself and the baby once she's ready to work again. I think she's being realistic about her situation and not expecting me to take care of her indefinitely, which is good because I wouldn't do that anyway. The lease on this apartment is in my name, and I've worked hard to build a stable life here, and I'm not willing to jeopardize that by taking on long-term responsibility for Haley and

her baby. I'm helping her through this crisis because it's the right thing to do, but after the baby is born and she recovers, she needs to figure out her own path forward. I think she knows that and accepts it because she hasn't asked me about staying longer or hinted that she hopes this will become permanent. She talks about her future plans like they involve her and the baby finding their own place and building their own life, which is what needs to happen. Next week she has another doctor appointment, and the week after that is her due date, so this temporary arrangement is almost over. I'm curious to see how I'll feel when she actually leaves and whether I'll miss having her around or just be relieved to have my space back to myself.

Final update. Haley had her baby two weeks ago, and they moved out of my apartment yesterday. I'm sitting here trying to process everything that happened and figure out how I feel about all of it now that it's over. The baby is a girl, and Haley named her Daisy. She's healthy and beautiful and perfect the way all newborns are supposed to be. The birth happened faster than anyone expected, and I ended up driving Haley to the hospital at 4 a.m. when her water broke and the contraction started coming really close together. She was scared and in pain and kept apologizing for waking me up, like I would be mad about missing sleep when she was literally in labor with my niece. I stayed at the hospital while Haley

was in delivery because she didn't have anyone else there, and even though we're not close, I couldn't leave her to go through that alone. The nurses assumed that, I was the baby's father at first, and I had to explain that I was the uncle and the father wasn't in the picture, which led to some awkward conversations. Daisy was born after about eight hours of labor, and when the nurse handed her to Haley, I could see something change in my sister's face, like she was looking at the most important thing in the world. Haley started crying in talking to the baby and promising that she would never abandon her or let anyone hurt her, and I had to leave the room because it was too much for me to handle. The first few few years, the first few

days after they came home from the hospital were intense because newborns need constant attention and Haley was still recovering from the birth. I helped where I could with things like making food and doing laundry, but mostly I just tried to stay out of the way while Haley figured out how to be a mother. She was good with Daisy from the start, like she had natural instincts for taking care of her baby. Haley has grown up in the past six years, but watching her with Daisy made me think she might actually be a decent mother. Haley got a approved for an apartment in a subsidized housing complex that allows children and has child care facilities on site, which seems like a good setup for a single mother starting over. The apartment is small, but it's clean and safe and affordable, and Haley seemed excited about having her own place again, even though it's nothing like the house she shared with Mark.

She's been approved for WIC and food stamps and temporary assistance while she recovers from childbirth, and then she'll need to find work, but she has a few months to figure that out. Haley seems confident that she can make it work, and I believe her because she's been resourceful and determined throughout this whole process. The day before they moved out, Haley asked if she could talk to me about something important, and I said okay because we hadn't had any serious conversation since Daisy was born. She thanked me for helping her when I didn't have to and said she knew I didn't do it for her, I did it for the baby, and she respected that. Haley said she wanted me to know that having Daisy made her understand how wrong she was to give me up six years ago because now she couldn't imagine choosing anyone or anything over protecting her child. She said she finally got what family responsibility meant and how badly she had failed at it when I needed her. She asked if there was any chance we could try to build some kind of relationship going forward, not as the siblings we used to be, but as the adults we are now. Haley said she didn't expect me to forgive her or trust her, but she hoped we could at least stay in touch so Daisy could know her uncle if I was willing to be part of her life.

I told Haley that I wasn't ready to make any promises about our relationship because I still had a lot of anger and hurt to work through, but I was willing to see how things went. I said I might be interested in getting to know Daisy as she grew up, but that any relationship between Haley and me would have to be built slowly and with a lot of boundaries. Hayley said she understood and she was grateful for whatever I was willing to give, even if it wasn't much. She said she was going to focus on being a good mother to Daisy and building a stable life for them, and she hoped that eventually I might see that she'd changed and become someone worth having in my life again. After they left, I cleaned my apartment and put away the baby stuff Haley had accumulated over the past few weeks, and it felt strange to have my space back to myself after getting used to their presence. I thought I would feel relieved, but instead I felt kind of empty, like something was missing,

even though I had wanted them to leave. I keep thinking about Daisy and wondering what kind of life she'll have with Haley as a single mother trying to rebuild from nothing. I hope Haley keeps her promise to be a better parent than she was a sister because Daisy deserves to have at least one person in her family who won't abandon her when things get difficult. I'm not planning to update this post again unless something major happens because I think this chapter of my life is basically closed now. Haley and Daisy have their own lives to build,

and I have mine to continue living, and that feels like the right outcome for everyone involved. Thanks to everyone who commented and shared their own stories and gave me advice when I was trying to figure out what to do. It helped to know that other people understood why this situation was so hard for me and that I wasn't wrong to feel conflicted about helping someone who had hurt me so badly. I still don't know if I made the right choice. I still don't know if I made the right choice, but I know I made a choice I can live with, and that's probably the best any of us can do when we're dealing with complicated family situations that don't have clear right and wrong answers.