Reddit Stories - Spouse began a fresh POSITION and EXPRESSED a desire for an open MARRIAGE,..

Episode Date: December 5, 2025

Summary: A spouse starts a new job and reveals a desire for an open marriage, prompting discussions about boundaries and emotional implications. The couple navigates feelings of jealousy and trust while exploring the potential for new relationships. This situation challenges their commitment and understanding of love and partnership.

I hope you enjoy this story. Spouse began a fresh position and expressed a desire for an open marriage, revealing a wish to become romantically involved with her supervisor while remaining married to me. So I left her and she got fired after making a move on her boss. Hi Reddit. I have a story to tell. My wife, Run, 37F, and I, Vaughn, 37M, were high school sweethearts. We met when we were 15, and we've been together ever since. It feels like we grew up together, figuring out life one step at a time.

After high school, we both went to college, and a year after we graduated, we got married. It was the easiest decision of my life. We both ended up in high-paying jobs. I started working in my field, building my career, and a couple of years ago, I took the leap and started my own business. It took a lot of long nights, stress, and more coffee than I'd like to admit, but now, I'm doing pretty well for myself. Ren works as a marketing consultant. She's always been passionate about her job, and she's really good at what she does.

She knows how to sell things, how to make a brand stand out, and she's got this way of thinking that just makes everything click. I've always admired that about her. For 15 years, our marriage was solid. We had our ups and downs like any couple, but we were happy we made time for each other, went on vacations, had lazy weekends together, and spent our evenings watching shows or just talking about our day. It wasn't always exciting, but it was comfortable and safe. We were partners in everything.

But everything changed when Wren switched jobs last year. At first, I was excited for her. It was a big opportunity, a well-known company, and they offered her a great salary. She was thrilled. So, of course, I supported her. But the job took over her life. Suddenly, she was working crazy hours. Early mornings, late nights, weekends, she was always busy.

At first, I told myself that it was normal. It was a new job, and she wanted to prove herself. I knew how much this meant to her, and I didn't want to be the one to complain. But as weeks turned into months, it only got worse. She started bringing work home, taking calls during dinner, answering emails at midnight. She barely had time for anything else. Our evening routine disappeared. No more sitting on the couch together, no more talking about our day, no more weekend movie

marathons. I would go to bed alone most nights, and when she did join me, she was too exhausted to even talk. I tried to be understanding. I really did. I told myself that this was temporary, that once she settled in, things would get better. But they didn't. I started worrying about her health. She wasn't eating properly, always rushing through meals or skipping them entirely. She wasn't sleeping enough, waking up tired and chugging coffee like it was water. She barely had time to do anything outside of work. I brought it up a few times, gently at first. I told her that I was worried about her. That maybe she should take it easy, that she didn't have to push herself

so hard. I even suggested that if the job was too much, she could quit and take a break. We were financially stable. She didn't need to work herself to the ground like this. She always brushed it off. She said she loved her job. That it was challenging, exciting, and that she was learning so much. She told me that she had no plans of quitting, and she said it so firmly that I didn't push further. I wanted to respect her decision. But the more time passed, the more I started feeling like I was losing her. I tried to be patient. I told myself that this was just a phase. Deep down, I was starting to feel like I was alone in our marriage. But about seven months ago, my world turned upside down when Ren told me that she wants to turn our marriage polygamous.

At first, I thought I had misheard her, or maybe she was joking. But no, she was serious. I felt like the ground beneath me had been ripped away. It was like she dropped a bomb on me, and I didn't even know how to process it. I didn't know what to say, didn't know how to react. My mind was racing, and I could barely understand why she was saying these things. She told me that she had never been with anyone other than me and that she had started to feel like she was missing out on things. I was just sitting there, trying to understand what she meant by that.

I've always thought of us as this tight-knit unit, the two of us against the world, you know. We've been together for so long, and the idea that she was now questioning everything about our relationship. It felt like someone had just hit me with a ton of bricks. I asked her where all of this was coming from. I needed to know. I thought maybe there was some kind of issue that had built up over time, or maybe something had happened that I didn't know about. She told me it wasn't about anything in particular.

She said she had just been reading about polygamy and thought it might be something we should try. I was floored. I couldn't understand. I've heard of people having open relationships, polyamory, and all that, but I never imagined in a million years that Ren would want that for us. I asked her again, a little more urgently, if she was sure, if she had someone else in mind. She said no, there was no one else, it was just an idea she had been thinking about. I wanted to believe her, but at that moment, I didn't know what to think.

I kept asking myself, why now? Why would she want this after all these years of being happy, being just the two of us? The thought of her being with someone else, of her being intimate with another man, was something I just couldn't wrap my head around. I told her, in the most honest way I could, that I was not interested in anything like that. I said the thought of her with another man would kill me. It was the truth, and I didn't want to hide it from her. I didn't want to sugarcoat how I felt, because I was hurt, confused, and scared. She told me that it was only physical, that it didn't change our emotional connection,

that she would still be my wife. She reassured me that nothing would change between us, that she just wanted to experience something different. But honestly, the more she said it, the more it didn't make sense to me. If she still loved me, why did she need something else? I kept asking myself if I wasn't enough. If there was something I wasn't doing right or something she needed that I wasn't giving her. She was pushing so much for it, saying that it was something she wanted to try, that I asked her point-blank if there was someone else she had in mind.

Was there someone she was interested in, someone she was already involved with? She insisted that there wasn't, that it was just a thought, something she was exploring in her mind. But as much as she tried to assure me, I couldn't help but feel this deep sense of unease. It felt like there was more to the story, and she wasn't telling me everything. She went to sleep after that, and I tried to sleep too, but I couldn't. I just couldn't. I lay there for hours, thinking, replaying the conversation over and over in my head. I couldn't stop asking myself, what did I do wrong?

Why would Wren suddenly want this? Why was this happening now, after so many years of being happy together? I started to question everything. I felt so alone in my thoughts. I was wondering if I had missed something, if there had been signs I didn't see, or if maybe she was just unhappy and I hadn't noticed. I've heard about couples trying different things in their relationships,

open relationships, polyamory, all that stuff, but I never thought that would be us. I thought Ren and I were solid. We had built this life together, and I just couldn't imagine her with anyone else. I've always been monogamous, and the thought of sharing her, even if it was just physical, didn't sit well with me at all. I never understood how people could do that. How do you go from being the only one someone wants to be with, to suddenly sharing them with someone else?

The whole thing just didn't make sense to me. But a few weeks later, Ran brought it up again. This time, she was more direct. She told me, without any hesitation, that she still wanted to be polygamous. and I had to either be okay with it or she might have to consider different options. The way she said it's so matter-of-factly, without any emotion, like it was just another decision we needed to make it hit me like a punch in the stomach. It felt like she had already made up her mind, and I was being given an ultimatum.

I asked her what she meant by different options. Was she talking about divorce? Was she saying that if I couldn't accept this, our marriage was over? She told me that I was smart enough to know what she meant. And that was when it hit me I was standing at a crossroads, and I didn't know which way to go. I didn't want to lose her, but at the same time, I couldn't shake the feeling that everything was slipping away. Our marriage, our life together, everything felt like it was unraveling in front of me, and I had no idea how to fix it. I thought about it long and hard, and in the end, I felt like I didn't have a choice.

This wasn't something I could just brush off, and it wasn't something I could accept. I couldn't imagine a life where Ren was with someone else, no matter how she justified it. I couldn't live with the thought of sharing her, and I wasn't sure if I could even trust her anymore. The connection we had, the life we built, felt like it was being shattered, and I didn't know how to put it back together. So, I packed my bags and left. I didn't know where I was going at first, but I just knew I could. couldn't stay. I needed space to think, to breathe, and to figure out what I wanted. I didn't want to make any decisions in the heat of the moment. I needed time to process everything, to figure out if

there was a way forward, or if this was the end of us. I didn't want to say goodbye, but it felt like I had no other choice. Raine kept calling me over and over after I left. I didn't pick up, but she didn't give up. She kept calling, sending messages, and finally, she showed up at the hotel I was staying at. I wasn't expecting her to come to see me, and honestly, I wasn't sure what to think when I saw her standing there. I was so exhausted from the emotional whirlwind of the past few days, and I really didn't want to see her, but I also knew we needed to talk. Part of me was hoping that she had come to her senses, that maybe, just maybe, she was realizing how ridiculous this all sounded. But that wasn't the case. She walked up to

me and said, we need to talk. I think we can work through this. I told her, in the clearest voice I could manage, that I didn't want to talk. Not like this. But she wasn't having it. She told me again, we need to talk. I need to explain everything. I didn't want to hear any more of her reasons, but I knew I couldn't just walk away without hearing her out. So, reluctantly, I agreed to Listen. She started by saying that she didn't want to hurt me, but she just wanted to enjoy the thrill of being polygamous for a while. The thought of her needing some sort of thrill outside of our marriage felt like a slap in the face. I couldn't understand how she could be saying this after all these years, after everything we had built together. I couldn't make sense

of it. I asked her, who do you plan on being polygamous with, exactly? I needed to know. I needed to understand how deep this had gone. She didn't hesitate for a second. She told me that it was with her boss. I could feel my stomach churn. She said that she had been working closely with him over the past year and that they had grown closer. She said she couldn't help the way she felt that the attraction between them was undeniable. I felt a wave of nausea wash over me, and I had to steady myself. My mind was reeling. She wasn't just talking about a random person. She was talking about her boss, the person she spent so much time with, the person she worked late nights with, the person she was building projects with. I felt betrayed in a way I couldn't put into words.

She said, I want to enjoy the thrill of being his mistress, but I also still want to be married to you. I just stared at her, unable to respond at first. How could she say that? How could she even think that it was okay to ask me for something like that? My mind was racing as I tried to process it all, but I couldn't. I kept thinking about all the moments over the past year where she'd been distant, where she'd worked late and had no time for me. I thought she was just busy with her job, but now it all made sense in the worst possible way.

I asked her point blank, is this why you've been so busy with work? Is this why you've been ignoring me for the past? year. She nodded and explained that in the beginning, it was because she was trying to impress everyone at her new job. She said she was just focused on proving herself, but then things changed. She and her boss started working closer together on different projects, and that's when the attraction grew. She told me that she loved me, but she couldn't stop thinking about him. I wanted to scream, but all I could do was sit there in disbelief as she kept talking. She said that since her boss liked her too, she thought that polygamy would be the best way to make it

work. I couldn't even process her words. I just sat there, numb. This was the woman I loved, the person I thought I knew better than anyone, and she was sitting in front of me, telling me that she wanted both me and another man. The way she spoke about it so casually made me feel like I was just some kind of placeholder in her life. I was supposed to just accept that she wanted more, and I was supposed to share her. I couldn't wrap my mind around it. I told her, as calmly as I could manage, that I didn't want any part of this. I didn't want to share her. I didn't want a life where we weren't exclusive. I said, you can't have both, not with me. I won't do this. She didn't seem to take it well. She tried to argue, tried to convince me that it wouldn't

change anything between us, that I could do the same thing if I wanted to. She said that we could both have what we wanted, but I just couldn't buy it. I couldn't imagine a life where we both had to split ourselves between each other and other people. That wasn't love to me. That wasn't marriage. It was just some twisted game, and I wasn't willing to play. I told her, this is sick. This conversation is making me sick. I had been trying to hold it together, trying to keep my emotions in check, but I couldn't anymore. I told her she needed to leave. I couldn't be around her anymore, not after everything she said.

For the moment, we decided that we were only going to be separated. It felt like the best thing to do at the time, but honestly, after 15 years of marriage, starting the divorce proceedings was harder than I anticipated. We didn't rush into anything, and it took a couple of months before I even considered what was next for us. Yesterday, I got a call from Ren. She told me that she needed to talk to me, and honestly, I wasn't sure what to think. I thought, maybe she wanted to talk about starting the divorce proceedings. Maybe it was something she needed to get off her chest.

I wasn't prepared for what she had to say, but I figured we should meet so we could have a civil conversation. I also needed to grab some stuff from the house, so it made sense to meet there. When I showed up at the house, Ren was standing at the door, looking stressed and relieved at the same time. She said, Thank God you're here. Things are going crazy at work. I could see the exhaustion in her eyes, and part of me felt bad for her.

We had both been through so much in the past few months, and it was hard to see her like this. But at the same time, I was still angry and hurt by everything that had happened, so I kept my distance. I asked her what had happened, and she explained that she might get fired because of a misdemeanor. Apparently, she had accidentally sent the wrong file to a brand, which caused a mess up at an event. She said that her boss was furious, and now he was set to have a conversation with HR in a few days. I listened to her talk, but I couldn't help but feel a little numb to the situation. I asked her, the same boss who was into you and you wanted to be polygamous for. She nodded, and I could see the shame on her face.

She admitted that things didn't work out with him. Apparently, he wasn't into her at all, and when she made a move on him, he was actually shocked by it. He told her how unprofessional it was, and after that, things got really awkward between them. She said that now, she was on the verge of losing her job, and everything was falling apart. She was sitting there, telling me how everything was going wrong, how she had no one to talk to. It was clear that she was in distress, but I was still so angry about everything she had done, I couldn't bring myself to feel sorry for her. It was hard enough for me to process everything I was going through without having to take on her problems.

And then, as she spoke, she tried to hug me. I pushed her away gently, trying to keep my emotions in check. I asked her, is this really why you called me? To talk about your job. She looked taken aback, like she was hoping for more sympathy, but I couldn't give it to her. I wasn't there to fix her problems. I told her that I was there to get my stuff and leave, just like we had agreed. She asked me what I needed, and I told her that I was going skiing with a couple of friends,

and I needed to grab my gear. It wasn't the most important thing on my mind, but I had plans, and I wasn't going to cancel them just because she was in crisis. But Wren didn't seem to understand that. She started telling me how selfish I was for going away while she was dealing with all this stress. She said that it wasn't fair, that I was leaving her when everything was falling apart in her life.

I was taken aback for a second, but I stood my ground. I told her, these are the consequences of your actions. You need to deal with it. I couldn't sugar-coated for her. She had made choices that had led her here, and now she had to face the fallout. I couldn't carry her burden anymore. After I grabbed my gear, I left the house, trying to put some space between us. But that wasn't the end of it.

Things started to get even more complicated when my kids got involved. Today, my daughter called me. She told me that Wren had been saying things to her and my son, things that didn't sit right with me. My daughter told me that mom had said I had changed and didn't care about her anymore. She said that she didn't know why we had separated, but that mom just needed someone to talk to. My kids had no idea what was going on between Ren and me. We hadn't told them the truth behind our separation, mostly because I didn't want to burden them with adult problems. My daughter told me that if I could talk to Ren, it would be really helpful.

She said that Wren just needed someone to listen, someone who could understand. I didn't know how to respond to that. On the one hand, I wanted to help. I didn't want my kids to feel caught in the middle of this mess. On the other hand, I was still so hurt by everything that had happened, and I didn't know if I could put myself in a position where I would have to talk to Wren again, let alone offer her any support. I told my daughter that I would think about it, but I don't know what to do.

So, I'm reaching out to you, Reddit. What do I do here? Should I talk to Ren? Should I try to fix things for the sake of my kids, or do I continue to stay away and let her deal with her problems on her own? I just don't know what to do. Help me out. Update 1. Hi everyone.

I want to thank you for your kind comments and suggestions. It really means a lot to me. I wanted to update you all on what. what's been happening. So, Wren did end up getting fired. Looking back, I do think her firing was partly because of the way she made a move on him. Her boss is married, too, and I can't help but wonder if he was looking for a reason to let her go. The whole thing seemed unprofessional, and honestly, I'm not sure why Wren thought it was a good idea. But, it is what it is. I still think she's a talented person, and I have no doubt that she will find another job soon.

I know she's going to bounce back because she's smart and hardworking, but right now, she's taking a break to figure things out. In the meantime, I've been taking care of the kids for a while when figures out her next steps. I'm doing my best to make things as normal as possible for them. They've been asking about run and why we aren't together anymore. Kids notice everything, and no matter how much you try to shield them from things, they eventually start putting two and two together. For now, we're just telling them that Ren and I have grown apart.

I don't think they need to know the full truth. They're still young, and this is hard enough for them as it is. I don't want to put any unnecessary stress on them by getting into the specifics of what happened. They don't need to know about the whole polygamy thing or how Ren's relationship with her boss played a part it's just too much for them to understand. I've been trying to keep things as normal as I can. I'm doing more things with them, taking them out. spending more time at home. I know I need to be there for them, especially during this time. They're the ones who are really going through a lot. I've been having a lot of heart-to-heart

conversations with my daughter, especially since she's the one who seems to be feeling the most confused and upset about everything. I've been trying to keep myself busy, too. I've been focusing on work more and spending time with the kids to keep my mind off everything. Anyway, that's where things stand right now. I'll keep you all posted, but for now, I'm just focusing on the kids and trying to take care of myself. Update 2. Hello everyone. I know it's been three months since the last update, but honestly, not much has changed.

Things have settled into a routine, at least in terms of the kids. They've been going back and forth between my old and new place, and we've been sticking to the shared custody arrangement. It's not perfect, but it's been manageable. The kids are adjusting, but I can tell they're still having a hard time with everything. I've been keeping my distance from Wren since everything happened. I honestly don't know how to be around her without feeling angry and hurt. But last week, I finally started the divorce proceedings.

I thought it was important to do this in person, not just for the kids but for some closure, even though I wasn't sure I was ready for the emotional toll. So, I talked to Wren while dropping the kids off. As soon as I told her that I had started the process, she just started crying. I mean, immediately. I wasn't expecting that. I know she's been upset over everything, but seeing her break down like that hit me harder than I thought it would. She started apologizing over and over again, telling me how sorry she was for everything.

But it didn't change anything. It was the first time I'd heard her express how much she regretted the mess she caused. And honestly, I didn't know how to react. I wasn't sure if I wanted to hear it. I just stood there, kind of frozen, watching her cry. She begged me to reconsider. She said, don't do this. We can work this out.

But I couldn't. We were already done. The divorce was just a formality at that point. It felt like there was no going back, even if she was crying and apologizing. I told her that we were past the point of working things out. The damage had been done, and there was no fixing it. It was hard to say, but I meant it. She wouldn't stop crying, and I knew I had to leave before I said something I might regret.

So, I walked away. I won't lie, that moment hit me harder. than I expected. Seeing her cry, hearing her say how much she was sorry, it all brought back a lot of feelings. I thought I was over it, that I had moved on, but in that moment, I realized I still loved her. I loved her with every fiber of my being. I still do. I loved how smart and driven she was, how unapologetically herself she was. I loved everything about the woman I married. But the woman she became wasn't the same. She wasn't the woman I fell in love with. I don't have a lot of friends to talk to about all of this. The few people I do talk to, I don't

feel like I can be fully open with. How do you even begin explaining the whole polygamous situation to your friends? I can't even wrap my own head around it, let alone talk to someone else about it. I just feel embarrassed, like somehow I failed to see it coming. So, I guess this space has become the only place where I can be honest about everything. You guys have been amazing in your support, and it's honestly the only reason I've been able to stay somewhat sane through all this. So, thank you for listening. I don't know what I'd do without this community. Update 3. Hi guys. This is going to be a small one, but I finally did it. I'm officially divorced. It's been a long, tough road, and I honestly didn't know where.

or if I'd get here. There's a lot to unpack still, but I just wanted to update you all, especially since you've been such a huge support for me during this whole process. Forward slash forward slash.