Reddit Stories - Spouse DESIRED to embark on a BOYS-ONLY VACATION to Ibiza with the spouse

Episode Date: March 28, 2026

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #vacation #Ibiza #spouse #boysstrip #travel  Summary: A spouse expresses a strong desire to go on a boys-only vacation to Ibiza, raising questions about trust and boundaries in the relationship. The situation leads to discussions about friendship, personal space, and the impact of such trips on their marriage dynamics.  Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, vacation, Ibiza, spouse, boysstrip, travel, relationships, trust, boundaries, friendship, marriage, getaway, leisure, adventure, fun, experiencesBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6816713/support.This episode includes AI-generated content.

I hope you enjoy this story. Spouse desired to embark on a boy's only vacation to Ibiza with the spouse of my sibling. Upon my refusal, my invoice alleged that all heterosexual males engage in such activities and accused me of being homophobic. Not understanding. Hi there, I really wish I didn't have to make this post but, here goes. So me and my husband have been happily married for about 16 years give or take. We both have stable careers, good family life and are fairly fortunate despite the cost of living

racking the UK right now. We have two boys, 15 and 10, and up until this Sunday, thought we had it pretty good. We argue sometimes, of course, but never gotten too bad and we have a pretty decent sex life with some exploration, but I won't get into that. Long and short is, on Sunday, just after I dropped our boys off at their friends, my husband asked me if we had the house alone and more importantly, do I have a minute? I said yes and he sat me down then got out this printed poster for some sort of orgy and started explaining to me the concept of a gacation. How it's where straight men go to somewhere with sun, sand and booze and become gay for the duration of the trip, but that's fine because it doesn't actually count because what happens on

the gacation stays on the gacation. I was just completely silent and mortified, even more so when he said he was looking into booking a trip to Ibiza next year with his bill, his sister's husband, to experience it for himself. When he finally let me speak, I just said, I need him to be clear with me, is he gay? Because if yes, that's okay, but we need to figure out what happens going forward. I didn't let myself get angry or upset. I was just stunned. He swore up and down how he's not gay and he's 100% attracted to women and of course still loves me and our boys. So I said, well, do you think you're by maybe and he got very defensive, saying how I need to drop the accusation. and that this is the beauty of the gaycation,

it allows straight men to experience gayness without actually being gay and how it's like going to an aquarium? And again he was Adam and he doesn't find men's bodies or genitalia exciting at all, but he needs to experience this apparently. I said, well, I'm really not comfortable because even if he was by, this would be explicitly cheating on me and he got angry and reiterated he's not, because that's the beauty of the gaycation, etc. I just had enough and left the room.

I ignored him for the rest of the day but we spoke a T where I again asked him, Why does he want to do this so bad if he's not gay? He said how he's interested in how gay men's live differ to straight men's and that unfortunately, once the gaycation begins, it's simply impossible for a man to resist and he must surrender himself mind, body and soul to the gacation or be destroyed. I really can't put into words how surreal it was, because he was speaking so matter-of-factly and he again insists this is a thing that straight men do all the time and how he's actually doing it a bit late. I just said to him if he has any love for me then he can't go ahead with this and if he does,

the marriage will be dead. We didn't speak anymore after that. Since then he's mentioned no more of it but somehow, and this is what scares me a lot too, that decision genuinely seems to be tearing him up. He didn't go into work on Monday and only went in half a day yesterday because he told them he just felt too ill and he just looks distraught every time I see him. I really don't think he's wholly gay, though I can absolutely believe he's by, but I'd rather we talked about that in a healthy way rather than this incredibly weird denialism around going on a sex holiday to Ibiza. Has anyone known straight guys to do this and come back and just go back to being straight? Like Shirley, that can't be a thing that happens.

I'm so out of my depth here and I just don't know how to even initiate the conversation. For the record, I also haven't mentioned it to his sister yet. I don't know how I'd even break it to her. Thanks for any help, I just don't even want to think so being able to get this out there has helped even just a little bit. Edit, wow this blew up. This has been incredibly sobering and I think I've now confirmed what I already knew to be the case.

The marriage is dead, one way or another. In a way I was in denial myself about that. I have contacted my CIL and she initially screamed at me, calling me a liar and even insinuated I was trying to steal her husband. She rang me back shortly after, apologized and admitted she was in deep, deep shock. I have asked my parents to look after the boys and were going to meet tomorrow to discuss this deeper. I have also texted my husband and told him he will need to make alternative accommodation arrangements, but he will not be sleeping here tonight and a bag will be waiting for him.

Not sure if the mods want to lock the post or not, but I think I've got my answers. Thank you for all the kind words, especially Champion Flight, who really gave me the good dose of reality I needed. Comments where OPP has replied, Commenter 1, Your husband isn't proposing a gacation, he's proposing cheating on you with men while using magical thinking to pretend it doesn't count. The fact that he's planning this with his sister's husband makes it even more disturbing. His bizarre explanation about surrendering mind, body and soul isn't straight man curiosity. It's someone desperately trying to justify exploring his sexuality while keeping his heterosexual marriage. His depression about not being able to go isn't about missing a vacation. It's about

being forced to confront his sexuality without his convenient what happens in Ibiza stays in Ibiza excuse. His meltdown over not going shows how desperately he wants to avoid facing this reality. OPP, I read over this multiple times and I guess the worst part is I know you're completely right. OPP should consider about the divorce OPP. I wanted to avoid the divorce option, but I guess it's the only option, isn't it? Commenter 2, so this is just a thought, but I'm wondering if he was really planning on doing the gacation or if that was just a cover to try to get you to agree to it. What if the real plan was to get with women while he's down there?

O-op, that, I hadn't really thought of that T-B-H. And now the thought terrifies me. From the way he was talking about men, the fact he had a poster for a gay orgy, I mean it's one hell of a bluff, surely? Commenter 3, tell him you're going to have a straight cat eye on while he's gone and you are going to surrender mind, body and soul to other men. Honest to God if my husband proposed this to me, I'd use his time away to pack up, move out and have divorce papers waiting for him. Update, November 28, 2024.

So when I last posted, I'd contacted my husband to tell him he wouldn't be staying at home tonight and a bag would be waiting for him. As you can imagine we argued. Quite badly. I won't go into the specific details but no, I'm 100% on the. bored with the fact that a minimum he's by, might even be gay altogether. We've had arguments in the past, but I've genuinely never seen him have such a childish tantrum before, screaming about how I just don't understand the gaycation. Absolutely despise that phrase now, and insinuating I'm actually homophobic because I refuse to allow him to participate in this cultural exchange with the gay community.

A lot of you said to ask him if it'd be acceptable if the roles were in reverse and I did say would it be acceptable if I went and slept with other guys during that week? Like fucking clockwork, he was very angry and offended. Saying it's completely different because a gacation means nothing and what happens on the gacation, stays on the gacation, etc. so doesn't actually count. Whereas I'd just be straight up cheating. Well, I turned it around on him. No, but you see what happens in Manchester stays in Manchester.

It doesn't mean anything, it doesn't count. It's like bird watching. And, I think it got through to him. He went all quiet and then started crying, admitting the thought of me sleeping with another man is destroying his heart but relationships need sacrifices so agreed, while in tears, that when he goes on the vacation, I'll get one week in Manchester to do whatever I want. He doesn't want me to, but that's fair in a twisted way he supposed. I told him to get out of my house.

Thankfully he left without a fight. I know it's incredibly petty but I also drained the joint bank account, legal in the UK, so he couldn't try to use it against me. About an hour later, I got rang up by his mom, my mill, who just screamed and screamed at me about being a cheating whore, how I was horrible, what about the kids, etc. When I finally got my composure back, I just said ask your son about the gacation.

Obviously at first she got angry, but I said no, just ask him about the gacation. He'll explain but she called me a fucking joke and hung up. Later on, getting into the evening, got underscore another underscore phone call from her in floods of tears, she was very apologetic and I told her she doesn't need to be the one to apologize. She was so upset she put Phil on the phone who while he sounded calm, I could just sort of tell he was on the warpath.

Again, very apologetic and said he overheard that phrase. Asked my husband and husband initially said, No, it's nothing before explaining how it's a modern thing men to do, etc., and gave them the same spiel about how what happens on the gication. Men cannot resist the gication. How a man must surrender to the gacation, etc. Phil just said they told him to leave or they'd call the police. Don't care where he goes, but he wasn't staying there.

Husband tried to call me while I was on the phone, but I just ignored it and Phil just said he was so sorry for me and they have my corner in this so, that's one thing. Told them to be there for their daughter because it sounds like Bill is involved. Husband didn't tell them that and Phil just said he had to go because he was so, so, so, angry. Got a text from my husband after the phone call which was all weirdly rambley, saying about how I'd abused the gacation to destroy underscore his underscore marriage and destroy underscore his underscore life and again insinuated I, and his parents, was homophobic for doing such a thing. Told him we'll talk when he grows up and blocked his number. I took a day off work myself to

have the locks changed this morning so that's a 500 pounds gone but whatever, at least I know he won't be coming back. I'm going to look into how to proceed with the divorce and then we'll move from there. Oh, of course, there's also the brother-in-law. So I haven't yet underscore met underscore with Sill. She was in such a state and has taken this far, far worse than I have for reasons that'll be clear soon. We're going to maybe try tomorrow, but we did talk over the phone and I eavesdropped on the conversation with her husband where she put her phone on speaker and I went on mute. Her husband got home earlier, she made him come home, told him there was an emergency, and just said to him, can you please explain what a gacation is?

She told me afterwards she was praying he'd look confused or just be like what, or anything like that, but instead he just sat her down and explained that a gacation is a new thing where straight men go to gay hotspots and participate in gay sex acts but it doesn't count because there's no investment and because what happens on the gacation stays on the gacation. He said it's like writing down angry thoughts and putting them in a drawer. You never have to see them again. Whole time, Sil is in tears as he just calmly bats off the same points my husband did about how it doesn't count and he even did the whole it's impossible to resist. You must surrender or be destroyed shit. I seriously think they must be speaking to a dominatrix or

something. Are there even male doms? Because surely neither of them are that into this to actually make that up on their own? I really don't want to go into what was, disgust, for her sake, but it did become very apparent to me that the bill is into sissy hypnoporn and at times conflated that with the concept of a gacation. There was this utterly surreal moment where Sill is just trying to wrap her head around this while also in floods of tears and he explains, so genuinely, so matter-of-factly, that for most men, the gacation is either a one-time or annual thing but some men go on the gacation for years and others simply never return because they use hypnosis and mind control to be totally feminized into a state of permanent

pseudogainess. She said in disbelief surely if you're taking it up the arse willingly because you want to, that makes you gay, and he said no, because that's the beauty of the gaycation, you can do all this gay stuff but you don't interact with the wider gay life experience. She asked him if the sissy stuff is what he wanted and he said, not on a long-term basis and was adamant this is something all straight men do but she wouldn't get it because she's a woman. Then there were more insinuations of homophobia. Well, that marriage is dead too, I suppose.

The whole ordeal ended when she said to him he has a choice to make and he said, No, he doesn't need to make this choice because the beauty of the gacation is that it allows him to keep his marriage because it doesn't count. She said that's not the choice. The choice is whether he's leaving the house that night or she is. Only good thing he did was leave. Me and Sil spoke about it after that and I'm just, still utterly stunned. I understand she's gone to her parents for the support what exactly did we do to have our lives

destroyed in such an abrupt, bizarre, embarrassing way. For some advice I'm going to look at devices and bank statements to see if I can find any definitive proof of cheating. After that, I suppose figure out how I tell the boys why their father won't be coming home. Edit, spoke to other sill, my husband's family is older sister, him, younger sister slash original sill, and gave her a, skimmed-down version of it. She asked her husband and thankfully he was deeply confused but then mentioned about two years ago at a birthday party, he was approached by my husband and Bill about signing up to some online boot camp

around BDSM crowsdressing. He assumed they were taking the piss out of him so told them to fuck off and never really thought of it again. The fact that this has been going on for that long is making me want to throw up. Next story, fiancé said my brother can only be a wedding guest, then revealed his plan to send my brother away after marriage. But I raised him since he was five when our parents passed away. I'm 30F, and I'm currently two months pregnant with my first child

and engaged to my fiancé of three years James, 31, for little background when I was, 15, my parents had my baby brother, and five years after while I was, 20, and Matt was, was, five, my parents and Matt were driving home when they got into an accident resulting in my parents' death. After the accident, I was completely destroyed and devastated, but I had to pull myself together to be there for my brother and the following month I buried my parents and with the help of my aunt and uncle I applied for guardianship of my brother. It took about seven months before I was approved. I had to get a stable job slash income, which I did, proper housing for me and my brother, which I did by using money from my inheritance to buy a house and other little things, but in the end I

got my guardianship of my brother. It was hard at first working while looking after my my brother it's easy now, but there are still its ups and downs, but I would do it all over again for my brother. I met my fiancé when I was, 27, at a gathering, and we just clicked after three months of dating he proposed to me at first I said no because I still have my brother to take care of but after thinking I said yes, and we agreed to wait until we were financially stable. In the beginning of this year we wanted to tie the knot since I was pregnant because I didn't want my baby to be born out of wedlock, and we started the preparations and the wedding is happening in October but from what happened last week Saturday night it looks like there isn't going to be a wedding. There were many

issues where we fought and resolved. For example, the wedding date the date my fiancé wanted for the wedding was on my brother's birthday. I had a problem with that I wanted to throw my brother a big party because he is turning, 14, so I offered the week after in which we argued, and he even ran to his mother to try to convince me but I stood my ground stating my brother's birthday is important to me and him there was a little more fighting, but we end up coming to a resolved. Then there were the roles I wanted my brother to play in my wedding at first I offered my brother to be his best man, but he said he wanted his best friend, I said okay, then I said ring boy he would hold the rings on the little pillow and bring it up to us, but James said he wanted his nephew, I said okay, and left it.

Saturday morning I was watching this TikTok video where the bride asked her male best friend to her honor and I thought it was sweet so I decided to bring it to him. When he came home, I was in the kitchen while my brother was at sleepover at his friend's house that's Saturday night, as he entered a sat, I said I have the perfect role for Matt. What is that? Him I thought he could be my man of honor and then both wedding parties then coming out as couples they can come out as singles. Me what? Him man of honor or I will call it my brother of honor it would be lovely. Me but I thought you wanted my sister to be your maid of honor so that can't work. Him I never agreed to this and what about my brother I want him to play some role in my wedding.

me I was thinking he could be a guest and sit in the rows. Him I was completely shocked like I wanted my brother to be in my wedding and not some side guest. I didn't know what to say he wanted to put my brother on the sidelines. His whole family was playing some part of the wedding and my most of my bridesmaids were his cousins only two was were close friends but this he couldn't grant me. I stopped what I was doing and told him no it was my wedding too and I wanted my brother to be my man of honor and he started that his sister was better and my brother. would be guest, and he didn't want children in the wedding parties. I completely lost and started

arguing with him from one thing to the next. Since Saturday, he hasn't come home, only sending his brother to pick up some of his stuff, and his mother and sister have been blowing up my phone, but I'm a selfish woman and so what if my brother is a guest? So the last time they called was Wednesday night and I went bats hit crazy on both of them using language I'm not proud of, but I end the call with, yes, my brother is more important than him in this wedding if it's happening, and I will never put him front of Matt, so I'm fkin sorry and to let James contact me to talk things out. Update, hello everyone, I'm very sorry I didn't get to update it due to me being busy with work and canceling every wedding preparation I made and preparing Matt for sports camp.

I would like everyone to know that I will not be marrying James, and we broke up, well on Friday the week after posting my original post I got a message from James asking to meet and talk which I only agreed to if I could pick the day that we can meet, in which he agreed to. After picking a day which was Sunday where I knew that Matt wouldn't be home all day and I notified James, and he came around the midday period with his mother, I was shocked when I opened the door letting them in, as they sat in my living room not saying a word for a few seconds which made the moment more awkward than James stated that he was sorry for leaving

and staying away because he needed to think. Then his mother started condemning me saying that I wasn't acting like a future wife and I should put my future husband's thoughts into consideration and a lot of other comments. My name I'm disappointed in you, you're getting married, and you need to stop acting like this to your future husband, she said to me. I scoffed hearing that then turned to James asking what was his problem with my brother, and it has more to do with me showing attention to my brother than him. He sat there not saying a word for a while and the stated he wanted a life with me and the

unborn child but not with Matt. I felt utter disgust for him at that moment as he continued to say that after the wedding and having the baby he thought he would convince me that raising a baby and a teenager would be hard on both of us, and it would be best for me to send Matt to live with my uncle and aunt, but he would allow me to still support Matt financially. I was completely shocked, and before he uttered anything else I told him sorry but no, isn't happening and my brother isn't going anywhere. I stood up and took off the ring handing it back to him and told him it was over after saying that both him and his mother got up arguing that I didn't have to do that, and I will regret

this, and he started to cry asking me to think about what I'm saying. I just walked over to the door opened it and gestured for them to leave a few minutes past, then they headed through the door with James crying and pleading while his mother was calling me some nasty names. And later on into the evening his sister and mother rang down my phone cussing me out, but I only told them to let James come for his remaining stuff. There are a few things I would like to respond to. One, I saw many ask why didn't I chose Matt to walk me down the aisle. I gave my uncle, my father's older brother, the role because after the whole funeral he was there

helping me to acquire guardianship and just being there over the years for both me and Matt, too. Furthermore, I made a mistake in my original post-Mad is turning 15 this year I didn't see the typo. I'm truly sorry for that. Three, many of you advised me to abort, so I wouldn't have any ties to James, but I'm sorry, I had to think, and I wouldn't do any abortion and I would carry the baby to full term. Four, as many of you stated I should sit down and talk to my brother and if James even mistreated him when I'm not around in which I did. But he said no that James mostly ignored him, and he does the same. Plus I also told him the wedding is off.