Reddit Stories - SPOUSE'S SIBLING came to live with us DURING the time when I had...

Episode Date: November 29, 2025

Summary: When my spouse's sibling moved in with us, tensions rose as I struggled with personal challenges. Their presence disrupted our routine, leading to conflicts and misunderstandings. I felt overwhelmed, balancing my own issues while trying to accommodate them. The experience tested our family dynamics and revealed underlying tensions.

I hope you enjoy this story. Spouse's sibling came to live with us during the time when I had a two-month-old infant, and then his folks phoned to say she was not getting adequate rest due to our young child and proposed to provide financial assistance for daycare so their daughter could rest. Last month, my husband's younger sister made the decision to move in with us. She's in college right now, and instead of staying in a dorm like most college students, she decided that the dorm life wasn't really for her. She felt like it wasn't the right atmosphere or environment that suited her needs,

so she made the choice to find a place off campus. The problem is, rent prices are high, and it was difficult for her to afford a place on her own. She also didn't want to live with strangers. That's when she turned to us for help. She had explained how living with us would help her save money on rent and living expenses, and she asked if we would be okay with having her stay with us temporarily, until she could make new friends and move in with them.

My husband was quick to agree without hesitation, but I had some reservations. The reason for my concern is that I just had a baby only two months ago. As you can imagine, the whole pregnancy and childbirth experience has been quite overwhelming. Now that we have a newborn, taking care of him has been far from easy. Even though my husband helps a lot around the house, he is also the only one working right now. I'm still on maternity leave from my job, and I not only take care of my baby, but I also do all the housework. The situation is already challenging enough, and adding another person into the mix might make it even more complicated. My newborn is a very fussy baby. He cries a lot,

and sometimes he wakes up at strange hours in the middle of the night. He's also a very light sleeper, so any little noise will wake him up, which makes it even harder to get a good night's sleep. My husband and I have tried everything to help him settle into a better sleep pattern, and we're really hoping that this phase will pass soon, and that he'll eventually be able to sleep peacefully through the night. But for now, it's still a struggle. On top of that, I've been finding it really difficult to keep up with the household chores. I'm always so exhausted from taking care of the baby that I barely have the energy to do anything else. The dishes pile up quickly, and laundry seems endless. It feels like there's always something that needs to be

done, but I just don't have the strength to stay on top of it all. So, when the idea of my sister-in-law moving in came up, I couldn't help but feel unsure. Given everything I was already juggling, I wasn't sure if I could handle having someone else in the house. To make sure everyone was clear on expectations, I talked to my in-laws and sister-in-law about the situation. I told them that if she were to move in, she would have to stay in the basement, and she would be responsible for cooking and cleaning for herself because I just couldn't manage those duties right now. At that point, my sister-in-law seemed to agree to everything, and so I agreed to let her move in. In the beginning, things seemed okay. She kept to herself for the most part and stuck to the

arrangement. But over time, I noticed that her attitude started to change. For example, during dinner, my sister-in-law would often comment about how I should cook better because she always found some fault in my cooking. My husband never complains a word but his sister constantly has something to say. She would also tell me how I should probably ask her mother my meal about one of her favorite meals so I could make it for her. I found this a bit odd. She didn't like my cooking and now on top of that, she wanted me to cook her favorite dish. I politely declined. I explained that she was welcome to cook whatever she liked if she didn't like what I served. I told her that I was also very busy and tired to make specific meals just for her. She looked at me disappointed but didn't push me

further. Next, she constantly hogs the TV all day instead of going to her classes. For me, watching reality shows while I fold the laundry or cook is one of the few ways I can relax and get a little entertainment around here since I have given birth. But she likes watching other shows, and even though she could easily watch them on her tablet in her own room, she insists on using the TV and ends up taking over the living room all day long. This gives me no space to enjoy anything. To make matters worse, she leaves a huge mess around her. I found chocolate wrappers on the floor, empty chip bags, and other trash just lying around.

I try to tell her, but she responds by saying that she never used to clean up when she lived at her home and that she's still learning. I try to be understanding and give her some grace, since she's still young and learning how to take care of herself. But it's starting to feel like I'm the one who's doing all the cleaning, and it's wearing me down. I've been cleaning up after her as much as I can, but it's getting exhausting. Last week, I decided to check on her basement room while she was out and I was utterly shocked when I saw how dirty it had become. Before she moved in, we had renovated and cleaned the basement, so it was spotless. We had got her a new bed and a wardrobe, but now, there were

stains and dirt everywhere. It was hard to believe that she had let her space get so messy. I really thought she'd been cleaning up after herself, but it was clear that she hadn't been. I can't stand being around dirty spaces, so I was tempted to clean it up, but then I reminded myself that she's an adult now and she needs to start taking responsibility for her own space. So, I decided not to clean it. If that wasn't enough, she also doesn't do her own laundry. She constantly leaves her dirty clothes in a basket, expecting me to take care of it. She did try to do her laundry a couple of times, but apparently, she didn't know how to sort

clothes properly. She mixed everything up, and all her clothes came out in different colors. Since then, she's just left the laundry to pile up and expects me to clean it for her. It's frustrating because I'm already doing so much, and it feels like she's not putting in any effort to take care of herself. So, all in all, my sister-in-law has been a terrible house guest. Despite everything she's done, I've kept my mouth shut and tried not to rock the boat. I kept reminding myself that this situation was temporary, so it wasn't something I had to deal with for long. My husband has also noticed the issues and has been helping out a lot.

He's tried talking to his sister and encouraging her to be more helpful around the house, but things haven't really changed. Then, yesterday, I got a call from my in-laws. They sometimes check in with us, so I thought it would just be another casual conversation. However, this time, my mother-in-law started telling me that my sister-in-law has been complaining to her for several days about how she wasn't getting enough sleep at our home.

Apparently, our baby cried a lot at night and this has started to affect her sleep. My mill went on to say that her daughter needs a full eight to nine hours of sleep. to feel fresh and ready for the day, and she was concerned that we were depriving her of that. I tried to explain to my mill that while I completely understood her concern, it's not like I was intentionally waking up the baby to disturb her. This is just what babies do they wake up in the middle of the night. I told her that my sister-in-law was staying in the basement, while my baby and I are on the second floor, so the noise she might hear would be very faint. I even suggested

that I could buy her some earplugs to help her sleep better. However, my father and the then jumped in and argued that it wasn't just about the nighttime. He said that my sister-in-law was also exhausted during the day due to too much disturbance at our home, which was also a concern for them. I actually scoffed in disbelief. My sister-in-law literally spent most of her days lying on our couch, watching TV. In fact, she would often fall asleep right there in the afternoon after having her lunch, just lounging around while I was running around taking care of everything. So where was this exhaustion she was supposedly feeling? It didn't make any sense to me at all. All I'm trying to do is take care of my baby, and now I have to worry about making sure my

sister-in-law is comfortable too. I felt like I was being blamed for something that I had no control over, and it was starting to feel really frustrating. I couldn't hold back, so I told my father-in-law how we were doing everything we could to make his daughter feel comfortable. I made it clear that if S wasn't happy with us, then she was always welcome to find somewhere else to stay in the city. After all, we were letting her live here rent-free, and if she had so many complaints, she really should consider living somewhere else. That did not go over well with my in-laws. They seemed pretty offended by my response. My mother-in-law immediately started defending my sister-in-law, saying that apart from these little complaints, she was actually happy living

with us. My Mill told me how we were a family so we needed to compromise on a few things for everyone to be able to live together. This is when she suggested something that completely took me by surprise. She said that she and my father-in-law would be willing to pay for me to send my newborn baby to a daycare center so that my sister-in-law could have a noise-free day and rest well during the day. I was completely taken aback and for a moment, I thought that maybe I had misheard them. Did they really just suggest that I leave my newborn baby at a daycare just so their precious daughter wouldn't be disturbed by any noise during the day? It was honestly hard to process. Here I was, trying to care for my baby while dealing with all the stress of running

the household, and now they wanted me to put my newborn in daycare just to make sure my sister-in-law could have some peace and quiet. I couldn't believe it. It felt so wrong, and I was speechless for a moment. It was as if they were completely disregarding our family's needs, my baby's needs, and everything I was going through. All just to make sure their daughter was comfortable. I am not going to leave my months-old baby at a daycare center just because your daughter is complaining. I argued, my voice rising. How can you even suggest such a ridiculous thing? I was furious. I had just given birth, and here they were, asking me to put my baby in daycare just to accommodate their daughter's complaints. It felt completely unreasonable and unfair to me.

You are lucky we even agreed to take in your daughter in the first place, I continued, trying to stay composed, but the anger was boiling over. But no, you want us to adjust everything for her? Absolutely not. I could tell that my words hit a nerve. My in-laws tried to argue further, but it only made me more upset. They kept insisting that what they were asking for me wasn't unreasonable at all. They said I needed to calm down and take some time to think things over.

But how could I calm down when they were completely disregarding what was important to me? This was our home. My first priority was to take care of my baby and not my sill, who was a grown woman and needed to step up for herself. My father-in-law told me that if things were too much for us to handle, they'd be willing to start sending some money to help with my sister-in-law's groceries and other expenses. Until now, me and my husband had not asked them for a penny. We had been paying for all her expenses, no questions asked. Money was not an issue for us.

It felt like they were trying to brush aside the bigger issue, which was the lack of respect and understanding for what I was going through. I was overwhelmed, exhausted, and already doing more than enough. The last thing I needed was for them to ask for more compromises that only benefited their daughter. It was all just too much to take in, and I couldn't help but feel like they were completely out of touch with what was really happening in our home. So, Ida for getting pissed at my in-law's suggestion?

Update 1. When I told my husband what his parents had suggested to me, he was just as upset as I was. He couldn't believe that they even had the audacity to tell me such things. Without wasting any time, he called them immediately and started arguing with them. I could hear the anger in his voice when he spoke. He was defending me, and he wasn't having any of it. He told them off for even suggesting that I should leave our newborn baby at a daycare just so his sister could get some sleep.

Don't forget that this is your grandson you're talking about, he said, his voice sharp. You want us to leave our son at a daycare so my sister can get some sleep. That lazy girl sleeps the whole day and skips all her classes. She gets more than enough sleep, trust me. It felt like a huge weight lifted off my shoulders to have my husband stand up for our family like that. He wasn't about to let his parents make ridiculous demands of us, and he made sure they knew that he wouldn't tolerate it. He was just as frustrated with the whole situation as I was, and it meant a lot to me that he was so vocal in defending our family. But it didn't

stop there. My sister-in-law has also started to act like she has every right to complain about us. She actually came to us with a list of grievances, saying she felt like we hadn't been doing enough for her. She actually told my husband and me that we should be better hosts by cooking for her and cleaning up after her just like her parents did for her. She said all of this while looking pointedly at me, which made it even more frustrating. I could tell she was deliberately trying to make me feel like I wasn't pulling my weight, as if I should just leave my newborn behind and instead take care of her. My husband wasn't having any of it. He was firm and blunt with her. He told her straight up that she was an adult and in college, and that if she needed someone to clean up after her

and cook for her, she could hire a maid or go back to her mommy. Neither of us were going to take on the responsibility of treating her like a child. We're not ready to take on another baby, he said, making it clear that we had enough on our plates with our actual baby and everything else. My sister-in-law didn't take kindly to that. She started getting teary-eyed, clearly trying to play the victim. She argued that she wasn't asking for too much and that she was family. She wanted us to feel guilty for not doing more for her. It was clear that she was trying to manipulate the situation by pulling the family card. But my husband wasn't moved by her tears. He stuck to his guns, and I felt relief knowing that we were both on the same page. It was like we were finally standing

up for ourselves and our family, and it felt empowering, even though the whole situation was draining. Honestly, I am so pissed off at my sister-in-law right now that I'm seriously considering just asking her to leave. I'm at my breaking point. What's the point of having her live with us if all she's doing is creating unnecessary drama in the family? It feels like all the stress and tension have been building up because of her, and I'm just fed up. If we hadn't agreed to help her out, I would have never been dragged into these arguments with my in-laws. I would have been able to focus on my baby and my own life without all this added chaos. It's frustrating because we didn't ask for any of this.

I also want to make it clear that my in-laws are not exactly bad people. They've never tried to control me or cause any problems in my life before all of this. They've always been kind and supportive in the past, but this situation with my sister-in-law is totally different. It's unique, and it's only happening because of her behavior. She goes and complains to them unnecessarily. My in-laws don't seem to understand how easy she has it living with us. They don't seem to see how much we've been sacrificing to help her out. Instead of being grateful, she's complaining about things that don't make sense,

and it's honestly so frustrating. Sill literally has a roof over her head, free food, and no rent to pay. She has the luxury of not worrying about those things, yet she still feels the need to act like she's being treated unfairly. I've tried to be patient. but at this point, it's starting to feel like she's taking advantage of our kindness, and it's putting a strain on my relationship with my in-laws. I'm just exhausted from all the drama she's stirring up,

and I really don't know how much more I can take. Update 2. Okay, my sister-in-law really crossed the line this time. It happened last night, and I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. In the middle of the night, my husband and I were suddenly jolted awake by loud noises coming from the basement. At first, we were both so confused and disoriented that it took us a moment to actually understand what was happening. Then we realized that my sill was having a party in the basement.

The thing is, she hadn't even bothered to tell us she was having people over. She didn't ask for our permission, didn't give us a heads-up nothing. The music was blasting so loudly that we were scared that it would wake up our baby. We were furious. I mean, how could she do this without even thinking about the fact that we have a newborn in the house? My husband and I couldn't take it anymore, so we rushed down to the basement to confront her. What we saw down there was shocking. She was hanging out with five other people, and they were all clearly drunk and high. The place was completely trashed. There were used condoms on the

floor, and it was disgusting to even look at. I couldn't believe that this was all happening in our house. My husband was absolutely livid. He started yelling at them to get out, and rightly so. We didn't even know these people. They were complete strangers who had been brought into our home in the middle of the night without any permission. And with a newborn baby in the house, no less. We didn't know who they were or if they were even safe to be around. They could have been dangerous for all we knew. My sister-in-law, clearly high, started laughing like it was all a joke. She told us to just chill as if nothing was wrong. Her friends were scrambling to leave because my husband had threatened to call the police

if they didn't. It was like she didn't even take the situation seriously. I was furious too, and I told her to turn the music down immediately. I explained to her that the noise could wake up the baby, but she just scoffed at me. And then, she said, it's always about the baby these days. Don't do this, don't do that. No one ever thinks about me. Since that baby has come into our lives, you and my brother are not fun anymore. I stared at her incredulously. This is when everything really clicked

for me. I finally realized what the real issue was. My sister-in-law was jealous of our baby. It hit me like a ton of bricks. You see, before we had our baby, my sister-in-law was the youngest in the family. She was the one who always got all the attention and affection, and my husband and I were always there for her. We are much older than her, so we have always treated her like a princess. Whenever she would visit us, we would shower her with attention and take care of her without any complaints. I guess this must be why she wanted to live with us in the first place. She thought she could still get the same treatment. But things have changed now. My husband and I have become parents, and our priorities are different now. Our baby is our world, and everything

revolves around him. That's just how it is when you're a parent. Our lives are no longer about having fun and being carefree like we used to be. And I think my sister-in-law just can't handle that. She isn't used to not being the center of attention anymore. I think she resents the fact that she isn't getting the same level of attention she had before, and that is why she had gone complaining about us to her parents. I guess this must be also why she wanted us to send our baby to daycare so that she could probably spend more time with us. Meanwhile, Sil kept telling me and my husband how she wished things could have remained the same and how we would have never treated her this way had the baby not been born. Hearing this, I told her straight up

that she was being childish and immature. She was an adult, and it was high time she started taking responsibility for herself. We were not her parents or her caretakers. wasn't about to compromise my child's well-being just to make her feel better. I could see now that this living arrangement was never going to work. It was causing too much tension and too many problems. So, I told her that she needed to move out. I made it clear that the situation wasn't working for anyone, and she had to find another place to stay.

Thankfully, my husband agreed with me. He supported my decision and told his sister that she had a week to pack up and leave. If she didn't, we would pack up her things for her and keep them out on the curb. At that point, we had had enough. We couldn't keep letting her disrespect our space and our family. I was done trying to make it work. It was time for her to go. Sil started yelling and shouting at us, calling us selfish for kicking her out.

She kept repeating over and over that she had nowhere to go and that we had no right to just ask her to leave like this. She was furious, and it felt like she was trying to guilt-trip us into changing our minds. But my husband, who had been more than patient up until that point, was done. His response was sharp and to the point. Last I checked, this is our house, so yeah, my wife and I can kick you out any time we want. There is no rental agreement to protect you. Go and cry about it to mom and dad, but we are done with you. It was hard to hear her yelling, but at that point,

We both knew we couldn't keep putting up with her behavior. She had overstepped every boundary, and it was time for her to face the consequences of her actions. We had tried being patient, we had tried being understanding, but it wasn't working. She was taking advantage of our kindness and our home, and we just couldn't tolerate it anymore. Since then, my in-laws have been reaching out to us non-stop, begging us to not go through with our decision. They've been calling, texting, and trying to convince us to back to. down. My mother-in-law thinks we're being too harsh on her poor daughter, and my father-in-law is asking if we could at least give her two months to find somewhere else to live. They don't

understand why we can't just give her more time to figure things out. They're both acting like we're being unreasonable for wanting her to leave, but the truth is, my husband and I aren't backing down. We've given her enough chances, and we're done being pushed around. It's really difficult because we never expected it to come to this. We didn't want to create such tension between us and my in-laws, but at the end of the day, we have to stand up for our family. We have a baby now, and we can't let anyone disrupt the peace in our home. I know it's hard for my in-laws to see it from our perspective, but we have to do what's best for us. And right now, that means sticking to our decision, no matter how much pressure they try to put on us. Update 3, as some of you

might have predicted, my sister-in-law didn't leave even after the one week we gave her. She completely ignored the deadline, so we had no choice but to take action. My husband and I packed up all of her things into several boxes and put them out on the curb just like we had told her. We didn't want to do it, but at that point, we had made it clear that she needed to move out, and she wasn't respecting that. When my sister-in-law came back and saw her belongings on the street, she completely lost it. She was furious and started screaming and banging on our door in frustration. You could tell she was beyond upset, but honestly, we couldn't bring ourselves to feel sorry for her. She had been given enough chances and had disrespected every single one of our

boundaries. To make matters worse, one or two of her boxes had even been stolen while they were sitting outside. Of course, she was even more upset about that. But at this point, I just couldn't bring myself to feel bad for her. She was knocking on the door, pleading with us, saying that she had nowhere to go and that she was basically homeless. It was hard to listen to, but we stood firm. We told her that we would give her some money to stay at a hotel for a few days, just to give her some time to figure things out, but after that, she was on her own. Just to clarify, her parents are ready to pay for her dorm and there are plenty of college people looking for roommates. All Sill needed to do was find a place and her parents would be paying for it. But she was lazy and clearly thought

that we weren't serious about kicking her out. I know it was harsh to move out her things, but it was the only way we could make her understand that we weren't going to tolerate her behavior anymore. Of course, Sil didn't stop there. She immediately called my in-laws and begged them to intervene, hoping they could convince us to let her back in or at least give her more time. But at that point, my husband and I were done. We didn't want to hear it. anymore. We refused to even take their calls. We knew they would try to guilt-trip us into changing our minds, but we had already made our decision. We couldn't go back now. In the end, my husband gave my sister-in-law some money, and she had no other option but to reluctantly

call an Uber. She then packed up the few boxes she had left, and left our house. It was a difficult moment to witness, but honestly, we had been more than patient with her, and now it was time for her to grow up and live on her own. While I do feel a little sad that it had to come to this, I also feel a huge sense of relief that she's finally gone. There was so much tension in the house when she was here, and now that she's not around, I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. We can finally get back to our normal routine without all the stress and the constant mess. There's still a lot of work to be done, especially with redecorating and cleaning up the basement where she had been living, but now that she's gone, I feel like it's

all much more manageable. I have so much less to worry about each day. No more cleaning up after her or dealing with the constant drama. I can finally focus on what truly matters taking care of my baby and getting our home back to how it should be.