Reddit Stories - The SINISTER Plot_ My PARTNER's Mother Trying to SABOTAGE Our Bond_

Episode Date: September 9, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #sabotage #motherinlaw #relationshipadvice #drama #familySummary:A Reddit user seeks advice on dealing with a manipulative mother-in-law who is trying to ruin their relationship with their partner. The user shares their struggles and seeks guidance on how to navigate this challenging situation.Tags:redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, sabotage, motherinlaw, relationship, advice, manipulation, family, drama, partner, bond, toxic, inlaws, support, community, help, adviceneededBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. I believe that my 29-year-old partner's mother, aged 63, might be attempting to disrupt my connection with my 31-year-old partner. Greetings to our relationship community. I have been observing for a while and now seek guidance for the first time. Get down to business. I've been with my fiancé Adam for five years and we've been engaged for seven months. We have a beautiful home together, and we both work really hard at our relationship.

The issue isn't with Adam, he does his very best to try to mitigate the situation with his mom, but it's wearing on him, and I worry that one day he'll have to choose. I don't want him to have to do that, that would hurt him too much to choose between me and his family. There are a lot of situations, but I thought I would highlight the worst slash most recent. 1. About three years ago, one month after we purchased our house, his mom really needed windows in her house, mold was growing a lot and some no longer had seals. Now, his mom actually has a sizable savings account, enough that she can spend her money frivolously on luxury goods like Birken bags, and getting her hair done two times a week, her nails, buying a Mercedes

every two years, and so on. However, she never budgets for anything. So, she asked him for $25,000 to replace the windows, he said he'd cover them. When he told me, I, I, almost had a heart attack, he said it was alone and that she'd pay him back. I still have law school debt to cover and we have a larger than we should have mortgage. She made a comment to him about how I would let her freeze to death all winter and he had to help her. We took extra out on the mortgage to cover the windows, top of the line, everything, we still have yet to see a dime, I suppose it went into her new GL class, to quote the bard, neither a borrower nor a lender B. 2. Adam and I had a vacation planned a year after the Windows

Dilemma happened. We decided that we'd go to Europe for two weeks as he has never been and I lived there from the time I was three until I came to America for school. We set our hearts on Spain and rented a lovely apartment in Barcelona for the two weeks. It was perfect for two. We planned all of our tours and outings around our interests. Adam loves architecture, so we had a few tours solely planned for that. His mother decided that she had to come and she'd never been to Europe either. So she invited herself on our trip.

Like I did previously, I tried to appeal to his rational side, but I couldn't get through his emotional side. So I just accepted that she'd be coming along. Well, coach wasn't good enough for her and she had to have tickets upgraded to business, but she didn't want to travel alone. So she pitched in for a seat for Adam to travel

with her. I had to remain in Coach alone. Then, she didn't want to stay at the apartment because it wasn't a vacation to her. No, she had to stay at the W in Barcelona where she begged Adam to stay with her, but there wasn't any room for me. He tried to reason with her, but she cried and said how sad she was without her husband with her as he passed away before they could ever get to Europe together. He passed away ten years ago. So, I stayed at the apartment alone while they stayed at the hotel. We were supposed to meet up for breakfast, but she would never get ready on time, so they wouldn't be down until 11 a.m. And we missed most of our outings. I definitely felt like a third will in question why I even bothered to go on the vacation

when I could have stayed home and not felt so alone. Three, Adam and I began to discuss wedding plans. I would like to keep it relatively low-key as my family still lives in Europe, and cannot attend as my father is very sick and we are worried he may take a turn for the worse. Traveling is just not worth it for him, and I wouldn't want him to risk his health for something that is a one-day event. I told Adam that I would like just a courtroom ceremony, and his mother and sister, of course, and friends. We'd then take everyone out for a very fancy dinner. His mother did not, I repeat, not take kindly to this. She said that if her son was going to get married, it would it would have be a grand affair, for everyone to see. I just keep looking at my side of the seating

chart and the pitiful number of guests. I just want to cry. She has been planning it. I told Adam I didn't want this. I expressly told him that I just wanted a small. Really, really, really, small event, no go. She won't even hear him. She just refers to me as her and she and says how I think that I'm too good for a large wedding and that my family is too good for America. My family is American, my dad is slash was an ambassador. Four. This has been happening a lot recently, and this time, it's just been one too many times. Lately, she has been asking for more together family time. She lives quite close, but we don't see her all that often as she has friends and events that keep her busy, not too busy to plan the wedding though. She has

requested that we, Adam and I, have dinner with her three times a week. Well, what has been happening is that she has been reserving a spot at the restaurant for 6 p.m. I don't get home until 6, 30-some nights. She has just been encouraging Adam to eat out with her as I am too thoughtless to come home at a decent hour to eat with her son, how lonely that must be for him. It honestly doesn't bother me that he goes out to eat with her that often. But the thing she says behind my back, well, I came home early tonight, I left work, and was on the road by 4, 30 p.m., home by 5.5.000. Home by 5.5. I surprised Adam as he was just coming in the door when I yanked the door open to greet him happily. He was so excited to see me.

I could come to dinner with him and his mom. I told him I just needed to shower real quick and get dressed. He called his mom right away and told her that I would be able to make it. He also make a comment stating he hoped there was a reservation for three tonight. She said that there was, but she thought they'd eat earlier, like, 5, 30 and was already on her way to our house. She got there at 5, 15 and stated that she couldn't wait another second and had to eat right then. Adam said I'd be ready in just another 15 minutes and offered to call the restaurant and

request they move us back. She wouldn't hear it. She just whined about being hungry. And how a poor old woman should be expected to wait so his fiancé could fulfill her vain requirements. He came upstairs and asked how long I'd be, I said just another 10 minutes. He said his mom was really upset and hungry, if I could skip a step for. him so we could leave earlier. I told him to go ahead without me and I would meet them

there, that was fine, I got there, and the table was for two, of course. Adam said we could make room, but she said how we'd be inconveniencing everyone and I should just go sit at the bar and she'd try to get it fixed. I had one drink at the bar and then left, came home, calm down a bit, and now I'm writing this. Wow, that was long. I think I need to get that out there. I guess I figured everything out, though. Sorry to bother you or slash relationships, unfortunately, my relationship is over with Adam. I realized this as I poured my heart out to this sub. Thank you. Update, I think my 29F future mother-in-law, 63F, may be trying to sabotage my relationship with my fiancé, 31M. Wow. I really did not expect this kind of attention

considering I pretty much came to a conclusion. Seems to be the general consensus among you that it's the right one, on my own, but the support, our slash relationships, the support you have given me, I'm overwhelmed and feel extremely grateful in a way I cannot express. Through PMs and comment posts, I cried while reading all of them. Some of you shared words of wisdom, some of you shared different perspectives, others shared similar experiences, I feel at a loss for words. Anyway, there's There isn't a very impactful update, but I figured I would update you on what has happened so far and take this opportunity to say, Thank you. Thank you.

After I posted a comment on my own thread, and was about two glasses deep into a bottle of wine, Adam came home. This was extremely late. He sat down beside me and looked defeated. He just looked at me with hopeless eyes. I asked him if he wanted to talk about it. He said he needed time to process everything that happened. tonight. I told him I also needed time. He said to me that whatever I wanted to do, he would

accept it. So, I called up my maid of honor and asked if she would come pick me up and I could stay at her house for the night. Adam and I kissed, and he told me he loved me, and I left. I haven't been back, from Colleen's house. I made a call the next morning to my office asking for a few more days off to go visit my family. So, right now, I am writing to you. I am writing to you. I'm you from my parents' house in Europe. I called Adam and told him my plans, and he asked me if I would let him drive me. I told him I was okay to go myself with Colleen, and I would email him when I got to my family home. When I got settled at home, I emailed Adam, and I sent him the thread that I had made that Tuesday night. A large majority of you wanted him to read it. So, he has read all,

all of your comments. He also read the part where I came to the conclusion on my own that I had to end things. We talked briefly over Skype. He told me he felt raw from the thread, but he was glad that I had gotten things out. He asked me if I was sure if I wanted to break things off or if I still needed time to think. I said I was pretty sure. He asked me for a probability. This is a joke in our relationship for dealing with decisions. And I said I was 90% sure that this was the end for us, and I was using my time away wisely to really consider everything. For some reason, his eyes brightened and he just told me that we could talk about it when I got back stateside. I wouldn't break up with him over Skype, and I think we have a lot of legalities to go through regarding the house

and we have to collect any deposits that are available when we cancel the wedding things, because his mom didn't pay for any of the wedding she planned. Anyway, I've had a sit down with my father, he's been feeling better, which is a huge relief. He has offered me to, two-thirds of the cost of the house, so I could either buy it from Adam and pay off most of the mortgage, or just walk away and buy myself something else. I didn't expect this, but he said it would give me options should I decide what he thinks I have decided. He says he just wants me to have freedom, and that he wouldn't want to see my heart and my bank account broken at the same time. So, that's that. Like I said, nothing really

happened between Adam and I, I do have more power, though, thanks to my parents, and and I have been enjoying my time with my family. My mom and I have been shopping a lot, and my brother, my dad's doctor, and his family have been coming over for dinner quite a bit. My sister is expected to return from China tomorrow, and I am very excited to see her. I wish you all a happy holidays and a hopeful new year. Hopefully, my next update will have a conclusion, one way or another. Update 2. I think my, 29F, future mother-in-law, 63F.

may be trying to sabotage my relationship with my fiancé, 31M. Hi. I first would like to apologize for how long this update took. I've been completely swamped at work, and things have been happening at home too, so let's get into that. I want to thank everyone again for their continued support and interest in my relationship issues. Sincerely, the advice and shared experiences has made everything a lot clearer. Also, Adam has been following along. Firstly, I specifically want to thank everyone who defended and supported Adam. I don't see him as a bad guy, and I really wouldn't be vindictive, so, passive-aggressive comments while leaving, or making rude comments to him, or anything really mean-hearted, I couldn't.

Due to him, he has supported me emotionally through getting my MBA, he helped me study for my Ls He read over my essays to apply to law schools. He did mock interviews with me. He sat through boring orientations with me. He stayed up all night with me when I was sick with nerves before taking the bar. He was my cheerleader when I ran my first triathlon, and he is my champion when I see a house centipede. He is my dream man, and I would never give up my relationship with him if I didn't feel like I was fighting a losing battle. Now, are you guys in for a real shocker? Someone made a comment in the update that he would be outside my parents' house if he really wanted it to work. He took your advice to heart, and he was outside with his bags and a rental

on the evening of the 24th. I, uh, I was taken aback, and I blurted out what the fuck are you doing here? He just laughed and said he wanted to talk about everything and it couldn't wait until I got back. He'd been reading all the comments on the threads, and he felt like they were very eye-opening. He browsed our slash raised by narcissists and felt very moved by the similarity some of the posters have with their parents. He said that he spent the last few days thinking about what went down at the restaurant with his mother and how the look in my eyes when I looked at him after I realized what had happened broke his heart. What I didn't know was that he and his mother got into a row after I went to sit at the bar, fighting about me, and how he doesn't feel free, how his sister

used to say she had the same problems but since she moved far away, it has died down a lot. A lot of people ask me why I put up with this for so long. I tried to remember when this really started happening, when it stopped appearing like regular mother-in-law, don't want to lose my son comments and began to feel like isolation and vehemence. We used to have an okay relationship when we first met, sometimes we'd go shopping together, and once we got our nails done, it was around when Adam and I purchased the house together,

that's when it really started to get bad. The Windows incident was the first really big issue I remember, when she realized we were serious about each other. So, back to when we were at my parents' house, we had a serious heart to heart. I bared everything to him, and he did the same. So, there was no extreme confession of incest or physical abuse. It was just that he thinks he was raised by a narcissist

who saw her control of her son. He pried in joy, slipping away, we came to a decision. Here is what we decided on December 27th. He went back to the U.S. after New Year's Day, a couple of days before me, and moved his stuff out of our place to a friend's, he didn't want me to have to be inconvenienced for changes he had to make. We have put our engagement on hold for the time being. He cancelled all the plans his mother made. He has been seeing a therapist since the middle of January pretty consistently, twice to three times a week. I've been to four sessions with

him, his mother has not. We have sort of begun dating each other again. I have been talking to his sister, and the things their mother put her through, Adam is very lucky. Now, about his mother, he has decided to give her one last chance to go to therapy with him, and he has stated that if she does not, he will be going no contact with her.

We have a lot to rebuild, but I know we can do it together. Final update, I think my 29F, future mother-in-law, 63F, may be trying to sabotage my relationship with my fiancé, 31M. It has been a long time, our slash relationship.

We're all a year older. Adam and I will be composing this thread together. Oh no, I gave away the ending. Yes, we are together, in fact, we're married. Here goes, last time we left off, Adam was seeing a shrink, still is, to try to unwind some of the damages mother did. We were living separately for the time being, Adam's mother tried to commit suicide, but no really, she called emergency services before she tried and didn't even have time to swallow

more than two pills. It's so scary to think that within his mind there was such an abusive past when he has always had such a happy exterior, my husband, man that's fun to say, was basically traumatized by his own mother his entire life, as was his sister. I had alluded before in one previous thread that Adam's sister had it a lot worse than Adam when they were younger, but when Adam's father died, his mom locked in on him. So, Adam's dad died of kidney failure, However, Adam had donated one of his kidneys to try to save him, his father's body rejected the donation and passed away about 11 years ago this coming April. His mother took it upon herself during his grieving process to manipulate him into believing

he killed his own father and she was alone now because of him, that if he wanted to repair what he did to her, he'd treat her better. Every time he thought that he could get away and create his own life and feel free, she'd remind him, the windows. For example, I only heard the part where she blamed me, but I tried to think back to the conversation and really tried to hear what Adam had said. It's about four years ago now, but he was telling me at that moment that the reason her house was falling down was because she no longer had a man to take care of it, because he killed his dad. He was trying to tell me, I just wasn't able to understand what it meant. Same with the vacation to Barcelona. She was doing it in front of me now. When he was younger, a lot of these issues had been

regarding academic success or athletic success. She didn't have any issue then with girlfriends or anything. She just viewed her children as extensions of herself. It was bad. It just wasn't this level of guilt-inducing insanity. Let's get back to the present day. Adam's psychologist had suggested Adam offer his mother a chance to come to therapy to work out issues. He wasn't able to propose this to her at the time because after her suicide attempt she whisked herself away on a cruise to get some much-needed R&R, whatever. Oh, my God, you'd think he was asking her to murder puppies with the way she went on. So, that's that, no contact, she has tried. But Adam has either ignored all phone calls with unknown numbers, we had our locks changed, and his work has strict instructions not to let her pass the

doors. She moved to where Adam's sister lives in July, but I know that his sister, we are close, has been no contact with her since she met her husband, we wrote off the $25,000. We either get it back in probate court, in inheritance, or not at all, I'm not really choked up about it, not enough to do any extra work to get it back right now, especially since Adam is worried she'll use it as leverage to buy back in, we ended up getting married in September. Flew out to be with my parents this week to renew our vows in their house, and we're going to have our honeymoon in Fiji come January. My dad isn't doing so well, but he always seems to fluctuate like that. However, my brother isn't optimistic this time, anyway, we were wondering, since you have all been so supportive. If you would do us one small favor, Adam and I are going to to have a grieving ceremony for his father, so he can process it correctly without manipulation. For any of you who have lost parents, what helped you get through it? Thank you for everything. We wished we could have invited each and every one of you to our wedding, but that would be creepy.