Reddit Stories - UNEXPECTED Request_ Relative Urges Child to Show Off ACROBATIC Skills at Marriage CELEBRATION, Granting Full Approval_

Episode Date: September 25, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #familydrama #unexpectedrequest #acrobaticskills #marriagecelebration #familyapproval  Summary: A relative surprises everyone by urging a child to showcase acrobatic skills at a marriage celebration, leading to unexpected drama and seeking family approval.  Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, familydrama, unexpectedrequest, acrobaticskills, marriagecelebration, familyapprovalBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Relative pleaded with my child to perform an acrobatic routine at her marriage celebration, giving consent to all the details, and subsequently shamed her on social media for overshadowing her. I trust this is acceptable. To share here. The reason I'm posting is because of my daughter who's been hurting in the aftermath of a recent performance. I'm sorry in advance for how long this turned out, but any advice from fellow aerialists would be greatly appreciating. My cousin Dana, not real name, had her wedding two weeks ago, and she asked if my daughter could perform at her reception.

My daughter, Jane, also fake name, has practiced Silk Slash Lira for the past few years at a nearby circus studio, and she's also performed with Slash through the studio at small gigs. She hopes to continue into adulthood and become a professional teacher, but this recent incident has shaken her confidence. She has a private Instagram to document her progress slash performances, and I only post certain performances on my Facebook. Her first gig with the studio and her first recital to name a few were proud of. Some of our relatives saw her performances through my socials, and they watched her perform at her studio's Christmas recital when we hosted Christmas at our home a few years back. Something that surprised her when they visited early to see her.

I love how they coordinated that, and Jane said it was her loudest cheering section to date. Dana was one of the relatives who came up early to see her Christmas recital, and she's always been super supportive. She asked me if Jane would be willing to perform at the reception, and I asked on her behalf. Jane was honored and excited when I did, and we already had a portable rig for her too, though we ended up renting a taller one from her studio. Dana got the idea from a YouTube video featuring an aerialist who performed at a wedding reception, and she showed us while requesting white silks and a white outfit. We scoped out the venue and purchased white silks along with a white costume that Dana approved of, and Jane was really excited throughout.

Jane even worked on choreography to a song that Dana requested, and she put a lot of time into it, even asking one of her coaches to help her with it. Dana insisted on paying her for the gig despite Jane not expecting to be paid, and she paid her a few hundred. However, Dana's had a change of heart. Jane received a standing ovation after her performance that surprised her, but we didn't know anything was wrong until Dana went on Facebook a few days later. Dana said she didn't approve of the outfit Jane wore and that she specifically told her to not wear white. She also said my husband and I pressured her to have Jane perform and that the performance gave off a mon classy vibe, lies that my husband and I couldn't believe. We sent Dana numerous costume links and we purchased the one she liked.

There was also nothing wrong with Jane's performance. Dana was one of the people cheering afterward. Jane received nothing but compliments afterward, but I'm disgusted that she had to see that post after all the work she put into it. The post also had comments disabled for what it's worth. I called Dana to confront her about the lies, but she didn't pick up numerous calls. I then called her parents who, like us, had received messages about her post, and they said that Dana was wrong. They apologized on her behalf and said they were also disgusted.

Dana's mom also said that Dana vented to her before making her post a few days after the reception. Dana told her she regretted asking Jane to perform given the attention, compliments and cheers she received for it. Her mom also said that she felt upstaged with Jane wearing white and having to hear how good she was. Dana's parents tried to call her after she made her post, but she didn't answer after their previous conversation ended with her parents telling her she shouldn't be bitter because she specifically asked Jane to perform. Dana's parents reported the post along with us slash others, and we've told the truth to those who reached out along with a post to explain our side slash stand up for Jane. We have text proof of sending costume links that Dana chose from. Dana's parents also requested to talk to Jane on the phone to apologize for Dana's behavior, and my husband and I told Jane that Dana was wrong, and that will be distancing ourselves from Dana permanently.

Dana's parents were surprised at her behavior, and we were two having seen her grow up. Granted, we only see extended family for Thanksgiving and Christmas because we live far, but other relatives were surprised too as it seemed to come from left field. Maybe there's a side of Dana will never know from our limited holiday slash milestone interactions, but our focus is Jane. We've tried to cheer Jane up by offering to take her to dinner among other activities, but she's been hurting which is why I'm here. Jane hasn't practiced at home or the studio since the reception,

and I don't want to invade her space at her studio by asking slash telling anyone there in case she doesn't want anyone to know. She asked me to return the white silks and costume after being so excited to receive them. She also said she's going to take an extended break from Ariel to reconsider if she wants to continue. Aside from Ariel, she's taken a break from seeing non-Arial friends too, choosing to pretty much keep to herself. We would appreciate any advice from fellow ari-lists on how to lift her spirits. We remind her of how we're proud of her, along with the many compliments she received,

but she's asked for space and to not talk about it. We're going to respect that and let time do its thing, but we'll consider any advice from other orilists who can relate to the time and work she put in. Sorry for this being so long, but we appreciate anyone who read and takes the time to reply. Update 1, before I get into what's happened since my last post, I want to thank everyone who took the time to comment. Two pieces of advice really stood out, and I'll get to them shortly. Since my original post, Dana's post is gone. I don't know if she deleted it or enough people reported it for to remove it, but we're glad it's gone.

She never apologized to us, or Jane, or even bothered to call, so our position on being permanently done with Dana stands. My husband and I made a post addressing the lies she spewed about our daughter, and we shared photo proof of Dana's texts where she approved of Jane's white costume from links we sent, not to mention the song choice she sent us to. Better yet, Dana's mother reposted it on her account which really surprised me. Dana's mother wrote that they loved Jane's act and that they disapproved of Dana's actions. My husband and I also made sure that Jane was okay with us addressing it on Facebook, and she said it was fine. Normally, I wouldn't use Facebook to address drama if aimed at me. But since this involves a grown adult attacking a minor, we felt the need to address it publicly because she disparaged her publicly, and Jane will remember whether we stood up for her or not

years from now. I had a chance to speak with Dana's mother since my original post on the phone, and she spoke to Dana again since our last call. Dana reiterated how she regretted asking Jane to perform, but she harped on the standing ovation that bothered her the most. Dana told her that she expected Jane to get some polite applause, but that the overwhelming response really set her over the edge because she expected the loudest cheers to be when she and her husband enter the reception, but that went to Jane instead. Dana and her husband also received a great reception when they enter the reception, but Jane's

performance did too, and Dana didn't expect it. Heck, even Jane was surprised by it too, she never received a standing ovation from a solo act before. But Dana's mother believes that if Dana had asked someone to sing who received a similar reception, Dana's jealousy would have been all the same. Someone suggested seeing if Jane would be interested in speaking to a therapist given how hurtful Dana's comments could be for a teen, and Jane said she's open to it so long as it isn't a counselor at school because, as of now, she doesn't want anyone at school or her studio to know about the incident. And she vaguely told the coach who helped her choreograph that it went fine.

We will respect her privacy request as it's her right to control the narrative. But in the same vein, I suggested therapy for Dana to Dana's mother since her reaction might be a bigger insecurity, and she said she'd ask. The other thing someone suggested was the possibility of Dana's husband, or anyone, making an inappropriate comment to Jane during the reception that made her shut down and not want to see friends or practice days before Dana's post. My husband decided to ask her, and Jane said no when he did. If something happened, perhaps she'd be more comfortable telling a therapist with time. But on the bright side, she said she might want to try a different aerial studio because she doesn't

want to answer questions about how it went, or share a video, at her home studio. So we will help her find somewhere new as she asked. We hope she doesn't permanently leave her current studio because she has friends and coaches who are supportive, and she performs with that studios troupe at festivals slash gigs, but I personally understand the need to sometimes go somewhere where nobody knows you for a break, and we hope that that will help her. She hasn't said definitely yet. But if we does, we'll take her. She still wants an extended break from Ariel in the meantime. But even if slash when she goes back, she said she may never want to perform again and would rather do it leisurely, one of the reasons she doesn't want to return to her home studio where she's a part

of their troop. She asked if we tell her troop coach that she won't perform with them anymore if it comes to it. And if that's what she wants down the road, then we will. Hopefully time heals this wound and helps her at least keep the friends she has there, but we can only hope. Update 2, December 24th, This is going to be the last time I update, and I want to thank everyone who gave advice. In my last post, I mentioned that Jane said she'd be open to talking to a professional so long as it wasn't anyone from her school, and we agreed to accommodate her. However, she changed her mind shortly after and said she wanted to talk to her coach instead whom she had been brushing off since the reception and being vague about how it went.

She and her coach put a lot of time into choreographing the act for Dana, and she didn't even charge her for the sessions to do so. Her coach is also part of her circus studios performing troupe, and she has always been supportive and understanding. We supported her decision to talk with her coach, and they did in person. It was after they spoke that Jane spoke to me following her coach's suggestion to do so, and I'm going to be somewhat vague about certain details of our discussion. She also asked to speak to me first before we talked to my husband afterward, and that's what we did. Jane opened up about how Dana sent a private message to her Instagram the day after the reception, but to her personal Instagram and not the private circus one.

Dana's private message was just as bitter as her Facebook posts, but much more hurtful. Dana called Jane derogatory sexual terms in her message, and I can't express how angry my husband and I still are. Jane said she was surprised upon receiving the message. Dana was always supportive of her craft, and she gave her a standing ovation along with her husband. Looking back, Dana probably did because everyone else was doing so. But Dana also wrote that she only received the ovation because they were family who were biased and couldn't tell the difference between a good and bad aerialist. Jane blocked Dana long before we spoke, and she said she was hurt because Dana was one of the

relatives who came up for Christmas early when he hosted some years back to attend her studio's Christmas recital which surprised her, and we all went out to dinner afterwards too. My husband and I tried our best to remind her that Dana's reaction was a reflection of her insecurities rather than anything Jane did. If the best man gave a speech that garnered the same reaction, Dana would have directed her vitriol at him. Jane said she understood that it wasn't her fault, but there was more in Dana's message that hurt her confidence such as bodily comments that were disgusting. She said she may return to Ariel at some point, but that she still needs time and is unsure

about performing again compared to doing it leisurely. We told her, among other things, that we commended her decision to speak with her coach and that will respect her ultimate decision. Jane also said that she didn't tell us immediately because she wasn't sure if she wanted further drama with Dana if we told her parents about her message. However, after some time, she said she actually wanted us to tell them because she felt that Dana deserved repercussions for it. She said she was surprised that Dana's parents called her out publicly, on Facebook, without knowing about the message, so that made her feel comfortable with us telling them. Jane also saved a screenshot of Dana's message.

And while we agreed to tell her parents, we suggested that she deleted afterwards because it's not good to carry around hurtful things. She's also still open to speaking to a professional about the other stuff in Dana's message that's more hurtful so long as it's no one from her school. We are in the process of trying to find a therapist who can help with some of the infidelities that led to her shutdown in the weeks after the performance. I honestly cannot thank her coach enough, but I just want to touch on a few more things that were suggested in comments. I received a few DMs saying we were just as bad as Dana for addressing Dana's lies on Facebook, so I want to be clear. My husband and I rarely use Facebook. And if someone had started drama with me on a Facebook post, I wouldn't use Facebook to address it personally.

I'd opt for a call instead. But since she disparaged a minor publicly with lies regarding costumes that we had text proof of her approving, we felt the need to post those messages proving that she signed off on them. And we asked Jane if she was okay with it first. The other thing a few people asked was whether her costume was potentially inappropriate. The costume we purchased came from a website that many professional circus performers use, including some who used to be in Cirque du Soleil and tagged the shop while wearing it on their socials. And we purchased other costumes from there in the past.

Heck, some of their costumes have been used in wedding gigs by hired circus performers too. Jane's costume also received many compliments, but we're glad Jane realizes that she isn't responsible for Dana's insecurities. This was also Jane's first negative experience in her young performing career. Despite knowing Dana is entirely at fault, her words still hurt as they were close before this. Jane has kept in contact with her coach since, and she's even considering considering a different apparatus to take her mind off of silks that is temporarily tainted. We hope that time in therapy will help her with whatever she chooses, but her coach has also floated the idea of organizing a hangout with her troop

completely outside of Ariel like a zip line slash rope course day to get her mind off of it while seeing her friends, and she said she'd be open to it. Dana's parents also sent Sherry's berries for Jane, which was really sweet, and Jane sent them a text to thank them too. Regarding Dana's parents, I discussed the private message with Dana's mother, and she was even more disgusted than before. She said that she and her husband would deal with it and that there'd be permanent changes to their relationship with Dana until she apologies and then some. She also apologized to us on her behalf and said she didn't raise her to be like that.

But for what it's worth, even before we mentioned Dana's message, she told me that Dana's husband and wasn't thrilled with her Facebook post among other things Dana complained about regarding the wedding, things that I had no clue about. She also said she's not sure if they'll be together much longer due to other things going on too, but I'll keep this to Jane only and hope that she comes back to Ariel someday,

or even a different apparatus if she chooses. Next story, got extremely frustrated about raising my wife's best friend's daughter every weekend because her dad was useless. But something happened that changed everything, I, 31M, am married to my wife Amber, 30F, we have a daughter Emma, 7F the problem is my wife's best friend Jennifer, 30F, has a daughter as well Harper, 7F, well Harper's dad is a lazy sack of crap and refuses to do anything with his daughter. He is the type of guy that brags about how he never changed a diaper. Jennifer and Harper are usually at Amber and my house on the weekends because Harper's dad is drinking and watching sports all weekend.

On Saturdays I normally spend all day with my daughter because I don't see her as much as I wanted during the week. However with Harper being there every Saturday anything I do with Emma I have to do with Harper. Take Emma to the zoo it's Emma, Harper and I taught them both how to ride bikes, takes them both to dance class, take them both to the kid's salon, and so on. Mother's Day was the last draw. I took them both to dance class Saturday morning, Amber, and I also pay for both. dance classes because Dead Beat won't. On the way home Emma asked if we could stop to get something for Mom for Mother's Day, I said sure but then it ended up I had to buy something for Harper to her her mom as well.

On the way home I just kept thinking why am I buying someone else's wife a Mother's Day gift, that's his job. A few days later, because I did not want to ruin Mother's Day, I told my wife that I am tired of raising Harper, her real father needs to step up. I tired of it taking away time I get to spend with Emma. She said that Jennifer is her best friend and we need to be there for Harper. Now she is not speaking to me and sleeping in the guest bedroom. So Ida.

Just wanted to add some updates to questions I see. Emma and Harper are best friends. It was my idea to spend Saturday with Emma. I work more during the week so I wanted to spend Saturday with Emma and to give my wife a bit of a break. We pay for things be Jennifer's husband thinks it's a waste on money to pay for dance class and Jennifer can't afford to pay by herself. Jennifer and Harper do things with Amber and Emma one or two times a week together during the week nights. Update 1, so quite a few people has asked for an update on this situation. Sorry it's taken so long but it's been a hectic few weeks.

As for the updates the Amber and I are fine. Her reaction was based on poor word choices by me. poor communication by both of us, and some things I was unaware of at the time. The short version is, things at home were much worse than I was aware of for Jennifer, and my wife had only recently found out how bad things were. Mother's Day was the straw that broke the camels back for Jennifer as well. She was raised in a you must stay together for the kids' family. When Harper came to me for a gift, she realized that her daughter did not see her sperm donor

as a father so it was time to get out. Jennifer came to my wife to ask for help leaving because she had no family in the area and Jennifer does not have the financial resources to leave on her own. So the night my wife was going to ask me if we could help her is when I told her I was tired of raising someone else's kid. That's what caused her reaction. The Saturday after out initial argument Jennifer did not come over and Emma went to her grandparents. So the wife and I had a long discussion about what was going on. That's when I found out all the stuff going on with Jennifer. The wife and I decided that Jennifer and Harper can stay with us for the time being.

My problem was never with those two it was that I had to take over for the deadbeat, or deadbeat if you prefer. When we told Emma about this she was super happy her friend was staying with her. We had a conversation with her that if she wants to have time with either parent without Harper, just let us know. And we do not want her to feel left out of anything. Last weekend with the help of a U-Haul and some friends of mine we got all of Jennifer's and Harper's stuff and moved it into our house. The good thing is we have a four-bedroom house so everyone gets a bedroom.

The bad news is my wife's office got moved to the basement. Wish me luck we shall see how this goes. Update 2 So it's been almost a year since my last update but with Mother's Day upon us I thought I would post an update and try to answer the questions I've gotten. Jen and Harper are still living with us. As I mentioned before Jen did not make that much money. She worked as a phlebotomist for our local health network. The good news is with the current nursing shortage they have a program where they will pay for employees to go to nursing school.

She was able to start that in the end of August. The bad news is it's an 18-month program and they only let you work 20 hours a week while you are in the program. So the arrangement is when she graduates she will move out then. That should be next May. The divorce with Deadbeat is still ongoing. Once he found out he was going to have to pay child support he tried every dirty nasty trick he could think of. No idea when that will be finished. My wife is doing good, she happy she is helping her best friend, but five people in a house is a lot more work than three.

since she works from home the pre and post school work falls on her. Emma and Harper are still best friends. Shockingly Harper is doing much better in this environment than before. They don't do everything together anymore. Harper quit dance class, but she started with soccer. I think knowing that she will get fatherly attention no matter what she is doing is given her some freedom to pursue other interest. Harper has turned into my Lego buddy. Emma never had any interest but Harper and I have done some nice sets together.

Emma and I still have our daddy-daughter dates on the weekend. I still take her to dance class, and she started to take fencing classes. I don't know if I should be proud or scared that she could defeat me in a sword fight. I think I am doing better a year later. That there is a plan with a timetable for Jen and Harper has relived a lot of stress for my life. That I also don't have to see Deadbeat has also been a good. relief. I also try to take a few hours a month for me time and to do my hobbies. The bad part is I had thought that I was done with the portion of my life where I had roommates. It will also be nice

when Jen either gets her nursing job and or gets child support so that Amber and I can stop footing the bill for so much. For all the people that said Jen was going to become our sister wife, or that I was going cheat of my wife with her, or that she was going to ruin my marriage out of spite or any of the weird sexual fantasies some of you people had absolutely nothing has happened.