Reddit Stories - UNUSUAL lady CONTACTED me on social media ASSERTING that my father was her

Episode Date: November 9, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #socialmedia #familydrama #unexpectedencounter #identitycrisis #strangemessagesSummary: An unusual lady contacted me on social media, asserting that my father was her.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, socialmedia, familydrama, unexpectedencounter, identitycrisis, strangemessages, onlineencounter, mysteriousclaim, paternitydispute, digitalcommunication, unexpectedrevelation, socialmediamystery, familysecret, mistakenidentity, onlineconfrontation, surprisingdiscoveryBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Unusual lady contacted me on social media asserting that my father was her partner, so I feigned that he was involved with several women and arranged for a conference call where I discovered his infidelity. On my mom. Hi everyone. I have a juicy one for you. I say that because the actual drama has largely played itself out, but I'm feeling

some guilt over what I've done, and could use advice on how to move forward. using a throwaway and changing some details just to be safe. Background on my family is that it's been pretty idyllic. My folks have always gotten on well, are strong communicators, parented myself and my younger siblings as a team, and were very good parents. My teenage years were a rough patch in my relationship with my father, but since I left for college at 18 we really began getting along. When I pictured a strong marriage, I pictured my parents, bar none.

The other day, it all came crashing down. This entire story takes place over roughly an hour. I received a Facebook message request from a stranger. I'd been trying to fill an empty spot in my apartment, so I was in the habit of accepting these requests, and figured it was someone interested in the room. The initial messages were odd, however, broken English, small talk, no mention of an apartment. I then figured it was a scam of some sort, so I of course kept men. messaging the woman to see where it went and waste their time. Then, she made a comment about

my sister, and said that her boyfriend talks about me and my sister all the time. I asked who her boyfriend was. She replied your dad, he doesn't talk about me? At this point, I assumed I was being blackmailed or scammed. My father's career led him to a very high-profile corporate job with a massive international company, so it was definitely not out of the realm of possibility. certainly my father wasn't cheating on my mother then she sent photos one of those tri-frame Instagram photos her on the beach with a man who was no doubt my father selfies with arms around each other one with her kissing him on the cheek i thought okay this could be real or that could be some younger female co-worker who's just overly affectionate and dad indulged her in a selfie

this scammer found it and is using it around this time i started to started getting unprompted, unrelated texts from my father. How are you, how are things going, etc. odd timing, right? Thinking on my feet, I took a new approach. When she asked again if my father had mentioned his girlfriend to me, I quickly responded yes, of course, sorry, I just wasn't sure which one you were. My thinking was that if this was a scam, saying my father was routinely unfaithful to my mother and dated multiple women at once removed their leverage.

If this was real, then I'd throw a wrench in my dad's affair and force the truth out. Oh boy, did I get what I bargained for. The woman freaked out, frantic questions about who this made up other woman was. I answered them all and concocted a story about a woman I'd met just a few months prior, who was from, country my father works in regularly, made up a name, said my father had been dating women on the side for years, etc. She bought it entirely. The woman asked to speak on the phone, so I obliged.

At this point, I realized this was real, the woman was in hysterics, sobbing about how she thought my father loved her, how could he do this, so on and so forth. I kept playing it cool and acted sympathetic, spinning fiction that my father had been a player for years and that he was usually up front with his girlfriends about seeing other women, and that I was so sorry she had to hear from me. This let me learn who she was and how long the affair had been going on. Then, she asks if I'd be willing to be on a three-way call with her and my father, without his knowledge.

I immediately said yes. Within 60 seconds, I was muted on a three-way call listening to my father console this strange woman, who I had fully convinced that she was one of many side chicks, and explained to her that I was attempting to sabotage their relationship because of what I just learned. He didn't know that his father was cheating on his mother. He didn't know that his parents are getting a divorce, and now he's just learned. learned that from a stranger. He explained. At this point, I hopped on the call and let him know that, actually, I had learned about the divorce from him, since his insecure bitch of a girlfriend

hadn't said anything about the divorce yet. He said, oh, Christ and I left the call. I called my mother immediately afterwards to figure out what was going on. She let me know that the two of them had been going through the early stages of a divorce for several months, that it was amicable and they both thought it best, and had plans to tell all three of us once things were more finalized. She said that she had only learned of the affair, however, a few days prior to this incident. The following morning, after a lengthy and heated discussion with my parents, I sent an email to both of them outlining why I was so hurt by this. I don't care about them getting divorced, I trust them to do it kindly and amicably,

and they both seem intent on doing it that way as well. I did care about, this insane woman thinking it was okay to contact me, my father probing me once he realized that I had been contacted by his GF, my father consoling his GF of greater than three months instead of contacting me once he realized that I knew about the affair, my father carrying on an affair and endangering his wife and children, rather than just waiting until after the separation ultimately, I told my father not to contact me until I had reconciled what kind of relationship I want to have with him at this point. Here's where I need advice.

I feel guilty about what I did. I immediately, ruthlessly, and effectively destroyed the relationship that my father had with this woman, who for her part at least seemed to really love him and feel loved by him. She is now convinced that he was cheating on her too. While it's obviously my dad's own fault for starting this relationship in secret while he was still with my mother, I still wonder if I've destroyed something that could have been really good for my dad. I'm also kind of shocked at myself for being able and willing to manipulate people like that. I also don't know where to go from here.

I'm absolutely disgusted by my father and have lost a lot of respect for him. I'm not the one being cheated on, but I definitely feel like I've been put second fiddle to his GF of greater than three months. The damage control should have been with his son, not his mistress, right? Even so, I love my father, and have been building a wonderful relationship with him over the last four to six years especially. I don't want to throw that all away. I can't figure out in my head what it is I want him to say or do that will allow me to forgive him. I would love any thoughts on my behavior in this situation, or how I can reconcile my love for my dad with this absolute

loss of respect I have for him. Comments where op has replied, comment one, I'm a little confused by these timelines. You said your father was with this new woman for a few months. You said your mother said they had been planning the divorce for a few months. It sounds like their relationship is already done. Do you know whether your father's new relationship started after they had agreed to a divorce? Or after they had already ended it? The reason I'm asking is because a divorce is just a legal proceeding to dissolve the marriage. Once they've agreed to the divorce, the relationship is done.

Calling it an affair if it started after the previous relationship ended seems like a stretch. timeline of a marriage and a relationship are usually not the same, a relationship usually begins well before a marriage and ends well before a divorce. It would be like saying an affair isn't an affair if the couple is only engaged and not yet married. While it's not very classy to start a new relationship that quickly, if he did, I could see why he wouldn't tell your mom, knowing it would probably hurt her to move on so quickly. Though in the case of a divorce after a long marriage, at least one of the two parties, many times both in an amicable divorce, usually has been done in their mind long before it got to the point of starting divorce proceedings.

Oop, you said your mother said they had been planning the divorce for a few months. It sounds like their relationship is already done. Do you know whether your father's new relationship started after they had agreed to a divorce? After speaking with my parents, individually and together, I've learned that the affair was happening before divorce talks slash separation had started. My folks have also, still, not yet engaged in any legal proceedings, just discussions with each other and their pastor. My mom also did not learn of the affair until nearly three months after it had started. The reason I'm asking is because a divorce is just a legal proceeding to dissolve the marriage.

Once they've agreed to the divorce, the relationship is done. Calling it an affair if it started after the previous relationship ended seems like a stretch. Now, I did not know this at the time I made my decisions, but in the aftermath I've confirmed that it did indeed begin before the marriage had ended by any definition. The timing was indeed close. Comment two, I can see both sides, honestly. He did something that completely broke your trust, kept it secret, and consoled someone who's a complete stranger to you as you learned of divorce from his own mouth.

Meanwhile, you kind of walked right into that last one by accepting a three-way call. Then went nuclear. I understand that emotion can completely sweep people away, especially something big like affairs and divorce, but you are 25 years old. Silent three-way calls are high school tier. If you want to fix this, reach out to your mom and talk it out with her first. Then reach out to your dad when you've got a better idea about what's going on. Explain to both of them that they should not have lied and hid this from you,

and that this random woman contacting you hit you like a damned wrecking ball. they shouldn't be surprised about how it played out. Your dad could have handled this whole thing way better, but then again you could have as well. Oop, I understand that emotion can completely sweep people away, especially something big like affairs and divorce, but you are 25 years old. Silent three-way calls are high school tier. Well, sure, but again I took this approach to confirm what was happening. At this point I was not fully sure it wasn't a scam.

revealing myself on the call was absolutely an emotionally driven decision, though definitely not my most mature moment. My other point is that my dad clearly knew that I knew what was up before he accepted the call from his GF, since he was sending me roundabout probing messages. I think that his response should have been to ignore his affair partner and contact me immediately and directly to explain the situation, especially since my mom was already aware of the whole thing, I learned later. If you want to fix this, reach out. to your mom and talk it out with her first, then reach out to your dad when you've got a better idea about what's going on. Explain to both of them that they should not have lied and hid

this from you, and that this random woman contacting you hit you like a damned wrecking ball. They shouldn't be surprised about how it played out. Already taken these steps, I'm trying to figure out how to move forward from here. I don't want to lose my relationship with my father, but I'm struggling to see how I can forgive him for the deception and disrespect. update, wanted to post an update since the original post got a decent amount of attention and the advice was really helpful. Firstly, thanks to everyone who commented. I got some really reassuring advice, some challenging points of view that helped me be more

introspective, and some rather flattering remarks about my quick thinking. Y'all really helped me feel in control and added some context to my perspective, so thank you. Since my post, a few things have happened, my parents spoke. as a pair to each of our family members individually, my siblings, but also my aunts and uncles, grandparents, etc., to let them know about the divorce, the affair, and about what went down between me slash my father slash this other woman. My family is pretty universally upset with my father. Not that I want everyone hating on him, but he did, at best, screw up royally and it's good to know that no one is choosing teams instead of acknowledging who did wrong. My parents have both

blocked this other woman from all phone lines slash social media, etc. This is in part why the rest of the family was notified, so that they'd be aware if this woman tried to make contact. After the above, we learned that this woman had attempted to contact my 17 years.0-sister 24 hours before the events of my op. My sister missed the messages and didn't see them until after everything happened and was out in the open, still not speaking with my father, but have talked with other family about what's going on. As for how I'm feeling about the situation, any guilt that I had for what I did vanish the second I learned that this woman tried to contact my sister first. While my response was to tear this whole thing apart as quickly and effectively as I could, I cannot imagine what my

poor little sister would have gone through if she did contact with this woman. I'm livid that she thought this was even remotely appropriate, and I'm livid that my father at any point thought this was a safe or stable person to involve himself with. Therefore, I don't feel even a bit guilty about what I did any longer. I'm staying no contact with my father until I sort through what I want to hear from him, and seeking counseling to talk through how my anger in this moment slash at this situation is undoubtedly linked in all sorts of messy ways to my upbringing, etc. Crazy how hard it is to find a LPC with a greater than three-month waiting list. But I'll get there. Thanks again for the great comments on my original post. It really helped me judge which of my feelings were valid,

and where I needed to cut myself a break. I think I'm in a better place now, but of course would love to hear any further advice slash similar stories that y'all think might be helpful or answer questions. Cheers. Next story, begged my boyfriend to come home early from his monthly friend's night to support me

after my mom passed away, but he refused, stayed out late, and then called me selfish. I, 25F, and my boyfriend, 27M, have been in a relationship for four years. Our relationship has been very good for the most part, some fights here and there but nothing worth noting, until a week ago. I got a call from my brother telling me my mom had passed away last Friday.

Growing up, I was never super close with her, we were usually fighting, but over the last five years our relationship improved tremendously. We'd text throughout the week, and every Sunday I would go on four to five hour drives with her on speaker to keep me company, talking about anything and everything under the sun. She became my best friend. For context, my boyfriend knows how close we had gotten and had even joined me for some of those drives. Now is the problem. My boyfriend has a fairly close group of friends that he keeps up with, usually gaming with them throughout the week. Then, once a month, him and his friends will hang out and drink. He let me know a few days prior that he would be

hanging out with them that Friday. When I got the news, I immediately called him, breaking down and telling him I didn't know what to do and that I knew I needed to be with him tonight. He went from consoling me to saying, I let you know a few days ago I have plans with my friends, I only get to see them once a month. I told him I understood, but I really needed him and I'm sure they would reschedule, to which he said they definitely wouldn't be able to as they all have their own responsibilities. After some more time going back and forth, I gave in and said I would be okay with him going as long as he left early. Since he leaves at 7 p.m., I said I would like for him to come back by 11. He agreed. I spent the night going through texts with her, photos, everything I

could. I tried to distract myself with other things but nothing worked. Eventually, 10 p.m. rolls around and I text my boyfriend, will you be leaving in an hour? To which he responds, you told me 12, so I'll be leaving then. I told him I said, 11 and I was standing by that. He didn't respond after, and came home at 12. I asked him why he didn't reply and why he didn't just come back an hour earlier. He immediately got upset with me, telling me I was being selfish for ruining his night with his friends. Him spending an extra hour there means nothing since he still left early, and I would be fine since I didn't spend my childhood with her anyways. I told him I didn't even want him to go out with them that day to

begin with since I had just gotten the news, but I agreed to it under that specific condition, and so had he. He could also just catch up with his friends when they gamed during the week. The fight ended with him telling me I was again being selfish as he doesn't get to see them in person often, and that I shouldn't expect him to drop everything for me. We've been fairly cold to each other since which has left me overthinking and reevaluating our relationship. On one hand, I am extremely heartbroken he wasn't there for me and no that's not something I want for my future, but on the other hand, his words have definitely gotten to me and I feel bad for separating him from his friends. I also know it would break me more to lose someone else so

close to me. Where do I go from here? Update, I want to start off by saying, thank you so much to everyone that commented. I spent a good while reading every single comment, so for everyone that gave me advice and shared their stories, please know I am extremely grateful for you. I also really appreciate everyone that gave me their condolences. Now for the update. A little while after posting, one of my boyfriend's friends reached out to me. He asked me if I had posted it, because if I did, he had something to tell me. I said yes, and he told me before my boyfriend left their boys' night. He had started complaining about me to everyone there, telling them I was being a psycho and forcing him to leave. He completely lied about my relationship with my mom and

told them I wasn't close with her at all, rarely talked to her. Anytime I mentioned her I did nothing but shit talk her, and that I was using her death as a way to control him. I also learned throughout our entire relationship he'd tell his friends about every fight of ours and again would completely lie about everything that happened in them. For context, I am not close with any of his friends and he had apparently told them I was faking my personality whenever I interacted with them and shit-talked them when they weren't around as well, ironic, so I don't necessarily blame them for believing it. The only reason why his friend reached out was because my boyfriend had done the same thing in past relationships,

and he was starting to get suspicious and tired of it. I confronted my boyfriend about it afterwards, and he denied everything for a while before ultimately admitting to it all. He started crying, saying he doesn't know why he's like this but that he loves me, can't live without me, anything and everything you can think of. I packed whatever I could and told him I needed time to think. I'd be staying with my brother in the meantime as I had to drive out to go to my mom's funeral and go through her things. So, for the few that asked if I had another support system, my family lives a few states away as my boyfriend and I started out long distance, and I moved away from them a couple years ago for him. The few new friends I made are away traveling for the

summer, which I couldn't join in on for numerous reasons. I also couldn't get out of bed for the majority of the week so I didn't leave sooner. What he didn't know at the time was that I didn't need time to think, and I had already decided I would not be coming back. As I said in my original post, there was nothing awful worth noting about him during our relationship. He didn't treat me exceptionally well, but not terrible either. So, prior to his friend reaching out, I genuinely didn't know what to think of the situation. To me, it was out of character for him. My main thought was the news of her passing might have heard him a lot as well and he didn't know how to handle it. But, I now know that he was an entirely different person with his friends, and what was out of

character for me, was completely in character for them. It definitely scares me to think of what would have happened if I didn't post and never learned the things he was saying when I wasn't around. I also have no clue what I'd do if another life-changing event happened and he put something else above being there for me. So, to everyone that wanted an update, just know I have completely removed him from my life. No amount of tears and fake apologies will convince me otherwise. He wasn't there when I needed him and that's enough, but the lying and fake stories he'd share on top of that is terrifying. I know my mom would rip me a new one if she heard all of this and I did anything other than leave him alone. I will always be grateful for this

little corner of the internet and the awful future it saved me from.