Reddit Stories - When RECOGNITION Turns to RESENTMENT_ Office Honor Sparks RELATIONSHIP Turmoil_

Episode Date: September 17, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #officehonor #relationship #resentment #workplaceissues #careeradvice  Summary: A tale of when recognition in the office turns into resentment, sparking turmoil in relationships. Discover the consequences of workplace honor that can lead to unexpected challenges and strained connections.  Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, officehonor, relationship, resentment, workplaceissues, careeradvice, recognition, officepolitics, communication, teamdynamics, worklifebalance, professionaldevelopment, conflictresolution, emotionalintelligence, leadershipskills, workrelationshipsBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Boyfriend became angry when his supervisor presented him with an accolade at the office, instructed him to refrain from bestowing any more, and subsequently missed out on a promotion. Currently, he is residing on our sofa and wants to sue the company. Hey guys, long-time lurker in need of some advice. My fiancé was recommended slash given a training assignment some months back for a vacancy that would be opening, and he showed me a review at the end that he received where he received great remarks. However, to his surprise, he wasn't given the position, and he was the only person training for it.

He's been feeling down the past couple of days, but he also told me something that I didn't know. A few weeks back, he was given an award in a meeting that he returned to his boss, same boss who recommended him for the vacancy, because he doesn't like awards, and he never told me about it either. He also told his boss he didn't appreciate being blindsided, and he admitted he was emotionally stressed from the meeting when he talked to him the same day. He also told him to never give him an award again, and he thinks that that's the reason he didn't get the promotion when I asked why he didn't tell me about it. He said that work was his space and that it didn't concern me, and that honestly hurt.

He also said he's thinking about leaving the company, and he's been there since he interned in college. My mom said to suggest that he talked to a professional about why he was bothered by the award slash our relationship, but dad said I should reconsider because he created a fan to walk into that hurt his career. I want to see if he'll talk to a professional before reconsidering, but dad said I shouldn't even give him a chance. I believe I'm making the right decision by seeing if he's open to it, not just for job stuff, but also for our relationship. But I want to ask if I'm going about it correctly. Update 1. Before suggesting therapy, I asked him to further explain why he returned the award when everything seemed to be going well for him. And I want to remind you that he showed me a written review of his training assignment. That he worked for a few months, that came back with great remarks, albeit nothing about returning the reward that had nothing to do with it. He said that he viewed work awards similar to participation trophies that he wanted no part of. But when I asked if his reward was that, that, he said it was a certificate recognizing him for his work along with training slash

assisting others when his boss asked him to sometimes, mostly on computer when someone didn't know how to do something. So he'd show them over Microsoft Teams. He specifically said it wasn't a participation award, but that he viewed all rewards the same. He also said it'd make it awkward when he helped people in the future because awards make people seem less genuine and that returning it showed he was down to earth. When I asked why he couldn't just accept the reward and do whatever he wanted with it at he said it was a gesture to show he wasn't a management suck up and that he'd be the same person after getting promoted. He also said he saw someone lose friends at work after crossing over to management side because it was an us versus the

mentality. And he compared his gesture to the person who rejected the Nobel Peace Prize that he heard referenced in Captain America, the Winter Soldier. However, he knew nothing about it besides the reference because he loves Marvel movies and didn't even know the guys name. But when I asked if he regretted it since everything seemed to go well with his training before the issue he likely made for himself, he said he was considering suing the company because he was treated unfairly and he wasn't open to therapy because he did nothing wrong. When I told him that it hurt when he said that his work life didn't concern me, he said there were many things he said at work that I wouldn't approve of, but that it was his space

just like managers who talked behind co-worker's backs. But when I reminded him that we were engaged and incomparable to a co-worker slash manager relationship, he said I wasn't supporting him and didn't want couples counseling either. And that's pretty much how it went. The reason I spoke to my parents before we talked was because of an idea he floated in my first post that I didn't mention. And I want to explain it because some said I threw him under the bus to my parents, so I'll explain why. He said he was considering working a retail job in the meantime after quitting because he thinks he hit a dead end, and he said he'd be more respect at there too. The other reason I told my parents was because we were looking at a home to buy, but those plans have changed and he wants

to stay in our apartment. And that was before he mentioned anything about suing the company. He said he didn't mind making less if it meant having more respect, and I was willing to try and work things out if he considered therapy or couples counseling. But now that he's refused and doubled down, I told him that I'm reconsidering, and he didn't like that and said I wasn't on his side like his boss, same boss who recommended him for the vacancy and gave him the award, and has been distant since. He slept by himself on the couch and even ate dinner on his own the past few nights, and I'm trying to see if my parents can let me bring some stuff to their place come Friday. I feel like he threw everything away for no reason, got a great review

on his training and made an issue out of nothing when there was none. Learning about everything he kept for me still hurts, and I might try to talk to someone myself. But it really hurts because he basically said I never knew him at him at work, and maybe that's just how he is when he's not with me at it. This idea to reject the award came from Captain America, the Winter Soldier and the guy who was referenced in the movie, for rejecting the Nobel Peace Prize from what he told me, but he didn't even know the guy's name or anything beyond it came from the movie because he's a big Marvel fan. He also said it was a selfless thing to do and showed he wasn't a management slash award suck up to his coworkers who'd appreciate a down-to-earth manager when he crossed

over into management. He also said it was something selfless Captain America would do. He said he wants to sue because he was wrongfully removed from consideration for the position for personally not liking awards despite a great written review on his training assignment and that it would help fellow employees who felt pressured to take management awards to move up because he believes that all awards are participation trophies as a result of trying to talk to him and see if he'd be interested in couples therapy. He refused to think that he did anything wrong and still plans to sue, and I based my reconsidering of the relationship on his willingness to get counseling. I will be trying to move everything to my parents on Friday, but he's been treating

me as if I don't exist because he knows that I'm done. He's eaten dinner alone, slept alone, and barely says a word to me anymore because I'm attacking him like his boss, so I'm just trying to get to Friday, but it's been hard because he's turned on me update too. Returning to this because a lot of people reached out and were helpful, and I appreciate everyone who did. I'm currently at my parents, and my ex-fiancee was pestering me to move everything to their home before Friday when I eventually did, and it was really stressful. However, he did something that I didn't expect before I moved on Friday that I'm still dealing with, and a lot of friends and family know about it now because of what he did, before I got

around to telling them. He made a Facebook post that was pretty long, and he posted it to Twitter too. Long story short, he addressed the co-workers about what happened with his promotion and said that many of them were likely wondering what had happened and that he wanted to explain his side before the wrong people did he wrote that his bosses wrongfully rescinded the promotion because he told his boss that he didn't like awards. And he included the manager's name. He wrote about his conversation with his boss and how he respectfully spoke to him in his office instead of refusing the award at the meeting because he wanted to show respect.

He also said that his manager previously knew about his anxiety surrounding awards and chose to give it to him anyway when he knew it would hurt his focus. But he never once mentioned anything about anxiety to me. He never mentioned anxiety in the past, and he never mentioned that he spoke to his boss about anxiety too. He also left out what he told me about how he was emotional when he spoke to his boss and said some things he probably shouldn't have. He left out the part about being blindsided by the award and don't ever give me any awards again, and my dad thinks he's lying about having talked to his boss about anxiety to look like a martyr. He thinks he made it up to draw pity, and the rest of his posts made him think that too

when he wrote about how he was going to sue the company. He said he was doing it for others who may feel pressured to take awards in order to to move up and that he was fighting for them. He said it was unfair of his boss to refuse him for mental health reasons he knew beforehand. And he wanted to pave the way for others with mental health challenges. He also said he was inspired by NBA player Kyrie Irving. He's also a basketball fan who refused to get vaccinated and sacrificed salary slash backlash. The Brooklyn Nets didn't allow him to play for many games due to being unvaccinated. To be a voice for the voiceless for other people who didn't want to be vaccinated. And while he disagreed

with Kyrie's stance on vaccinations, we are both vaccinated. He admired how he fought and forced the Brooklyn Nets to play him and cave as they struggled in the standing slash injuries and showed that corporations would eventually cave to employees like Kyrie. My ex-fiance said he wanted to be a voice for the voiceless who felt pressured to accept awards to move up at his job. He also said he wanted to make management cave to him, and that was the reason he was suing for the employees. He also wrote that I had broken up with him because I didn't support his mental health condition just like his boss, but he never once mentioned anything related to mental health to me ever. Heck, he left out all the details about how he told his boss off, and my dad said

he might be making it up to create a case when he knows he has none or just wants to smear the company. Dad has also begun calling him the fake Captain America from Falcon and the Winter Soldier, and he showed me some clips about the TV show when I asked what he meant going back to my ex-fiancee. He also wrote he was glad to find out I didn't support mental health before we had kids which really surprised me because I suggested couples counseling together, but he told me he didn't need it because he did nothing wrong. He also wrote that I refused to have sex-slash sleep together after he opened up about his anxiety when he was the one who opted to sleep away for me on the couch after he accused me of not

supporting him like his boss. He also said he was talking to someone he knew who was a union shop steward for advice, and he said there'd be more in the future too. A lot of friends and relatives called me and my parents in the aftermath of his post, mostly those who saw the Facebook one I was tagged in, and my parents and I have been telling them our side. I also received DMs from people telling me off for not supporting his mental health who I'm guessing or his friends, and some of them were really vulgar too. That only happened on my Instagram, and I've blocked a lot of them since because I didn't know them. But it's been stressful after he tagged me in his post, and I'm honestly tired of repeating myself to everyone.

However, I don't believe in engaging him slash drama on social media, so I've continued to explain to everyone who's reached out with the help of my parents. The other thing that sucks is how he called my job after I moved out and told them that I said a lot of ablest things about him about his mental conditions which wasn't true. And while I don't think it'll amount to anything, I had to speak with HR about it which surprised me. Dad doesn't think anything will come from it either, but he's been livid, and I am honestly too. Dad has also suggested a lawyer after how he called my job, and it's something we're investigating for maybe deformation, don't know if that's the proper term, but maybe something in the ballpark of what he's

doing. I just hope he stops, but he doesn't seem to be from his post in calling my job, and he said that there'd be more to come too. I just hope he stops with me at the least because I could care less if he wants to sue on his own, but we will see what Dad and I come up with on a lawyer at it. I want to clarify something that many people seemed unsure about. Some people asked if he was really in the running for a promotion or had made it up. I saw a physical review that he brought home detailing the training assignment and the scores for the duties he performed, when it was done, and it was related to the position he was training for. The scores were really good, and he had no negative marks about the training, returning the award was unrelated to the training. His manager

also took him out to dinner a few weeks before he returned the reward in regards to the promotion too. I also saw some confusing about when my ex-fiancee returned the award, and many asked if he returned it during the meeting to make a statement to his co-workers. He returned it after the meeting and after spending time at his desk where he said he was uneasy, and that led him to go to his manager's office where he told him to never give him an award again. In regards to how he showed his co-workers he wasn't a suck-up, he said he told them in passing in the days after he returned it to his boss. The award had nothing to do with the promotion, he was training for, and wasn't a certificate needed for it. The award was given for how to be. The award was given for

how he helped others on Microsoft teams through screen sharing when his boss asked him to assist others many times, and it wasn't related to his training. This will probably be my last update for a while. So I decided to make it an edit instead since it seems I've surpassed the amount of updates I can have on some subreddits. My dad was able to get in touch with a lawyer, and he agreed with the suggestion that many gave to send a cease and desist letter to my ex, will call him Nate, specifically for contacting my job along with posting slash tagging me on a social media rants. We are considering other action too, but I wanted to touch on that because many suggested it. We've also quieted down at my job since HR called me in to talk about how Nate called them, and we had another meeting too. Long story short, I gave them the full picture,

and they agree that he was being vindictive. I also showed them the social media rant he made, and that cemented just how delusional he was. However, Dad suggested something else too. he suggested that I call my ex's company to see if I could speak to someone there, and I was able to speak with Nate's manager after explaining who I was to someone else. He ended up calling me back on the same day, and I told him that I just wanted to ask about a few things. I told him, we'll call him John, about how Nate had become my ex after his Facebook rant, and he said he saw it too from an employee who showed him. I also told him about how he contacted my job too when I asked about the promotion that Nate was training for, he confirmed it was real and that Nate was the only candidate, and he opened up about his decision to recommend him. He said he saw potential in Nate since he started working there in college as an intern, and he called him a hard worker too. He was younger then, but he tried to support him.

He gave him extra work that resulted in more hours when he wanted more in his early days, and he also helped him become full-time too. He said he was smart, honors in high school and college, and it showed at work too. He also said Nate used to be humble and appreciative, but that he let it get to his head somewhere along the way his annual reviews were among the best, and he recommended him for the vacancy that was opening up because he thought he'd do well. He called him into the office and told him that he wanted to offer him training for the would have come with a nice race too.

They wanted to hire within, and he wanted to reward him for his hard work. There was no applying for the vacancy at all. He asked if he was interested, and he said that he was, and he began training shortly after. The training lasted a few months, but he said he aced it. When I told him that he showed me the review of his training, he said it was true and that he did well. But when it came to the award, he got too buddy-buddy-buddy with how he told him. talked to him, and he told me some things that I didn't know my ex told me that the award was for helping people through Microsoft Teams through screen sharing, but he received it for more than just

that. He would stay late to help people with assignments that were not his responsibility, and he helped someone meet a deadline by staying late when it would have been late otherwise. In regards to the award, he received a certificate along with PTO during a meeting, and John said he shyfully accepted it. However, some time after the meeting on that same day, Nate went to his office and was unlike himself. But when John asked if something was wrong, Nate went off the rails and looked stressed. When I asked if Nate told him to never give him an award again, he confirmed that he did along with a blind-sighting comment. He also raised his voice and used some profanity.

And when John tried to calm him down, he wouldn't have it. He stormed out of the office and left the award there. But when his boss tried to find him a few minutes later, he found that he had left almost an hour earlier than he should have clocked out. He tried to call him to see if he was all right, but he didn't answer two consecutive calls. And I had no clue about him leaving early when he came in the next day. His boss went to his cubicle and asked if everything was all right. But when he asked if they could talk in his office, Nate refused and said there was nothing

to talk about. But when John said he wanted to make sure he was fine, he cursed at him from his cubicle, and others heard it too. So while his training review came back sensational, John said that that effectively ended his chances for the promotion because he was done with him he tried to be reasonable and gave him a chance to explain himself instead of getting on him for leaving early. But he spat in his face. He didn't tell HR about how he returned the award the day before because he wanted to give him a chance and felt that he might be. have triggered some trauma. But when he cursed at him the following day, that was it. He told his manager slash HR everything that happened and said he was wrong about him and wasn't mature enough, and he said it hurt because he put himself out on a limb to recommend

him when other managers wanted to hire someone older. Throughout our conversation, he kept saying that he was a good kid and that he saw himself in him. But the more he thought about it, he said he might have a silver spoon growing up because he never learned how to be personable during stress which was essential for management to his last point. My dad agreed with his assumption of Nate. Honor Society and High School slash College along with the Dean's List 2. His parents didn't require him to work when he worked retail. He wanted to work because his friends were going to work there. As long as his grades were good, his parents paid for gas, brought him a car, never requested for him to work, and paid for college too.

I paid for my own college and took semesters off because I couldn't always afford it with fluctuating hours but when people asked how I didn't see this side of him, he was always nice when things were going well, and his boss said so too. Giving him the award triggered something, and he wasn't mature enough to have a conversation about it. Nate would often surprise me with flowers slash other gifts, and we'd watch movies slash have fun. But when he became stressed with the award, his immaturity showed when he accused me of taking his manager's side and began to treat me differently.

My dad said that everything at work had gone right for him leading up to the award. But that that moment probably triggered something and showed he wasn't reliable when shit hit the fan because it was everyone else's fault. He also didn't blame me for not seeing it sooner because he was probably spoiled and protected by his parents at every turn. He also said that John didn't see it either after working with Nate for almost five years until getting triggered I still blame myself for not seeing it sooner, but this was the first time I've seen him really bothered by something that wasn't even bad.

The award was a good thing, but it is what it is. He made another post talking about a live stream he was going to do alongside his shop steward. But I won't address it in this update because it's getting too long. We're working on the cease and desist letter, and that is the first step right now. I appreciate everyone who reached out. It's been a lot having to explain to friends slash family who saw me tagged in his original rant, but taking things one day at a time because what else can you do?