Regulation Podcast - Bunce & Quince // Pig Parts Draft [86]
Episode Date: December 31, 2025Geoff, Gavin and Andrew talk about 86ing, table for wallpapering, desk reveal, fun facts, B&Q, Bov Mong, tape invention, sap tap, stickiest country, Gene Wilder, pig ass, pork cuts, blade steak, Pig P...arts Draft, secret mayo, white foods, womps and gloggles, FIFA Netflix, Red Dead Redemption Netflix, barista interaction, interactions, small talk, James Cromwell, President, and a ruling. Start this episode at 10:50something PM. Support us directly at https://www.patreon.com/TheRegulationPod Stay up to date, get exclusive supplemental content, and connect with other Regulation Listeners. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello and welcome to another episode of the Regulation Podcast.
My name is Jeff Ramsey with me.
As always, Andrew Panton, Nick Schwartz, Gavin Free, Eric Badoor.
This is episode 86.
And I was thinking about this morning while I was taking a shit.
This is the second episode 86 we've done.
That's, uh, we've done.
I mean, we've done two of, two of a bunch of them.
What's true?
This is the 86th, 86 second episode we've done.
I'm just speaking of this one in particular.
yes, you are correct. I wonder
how it compares. Oh, that's actually an interesting point.
See, you had me in the first half, Jeff. I wasn't, I was like, this is a ridiculous,
fun fact, but now comparable one to one, interesting. It's an interesting setup.
It also means to sack it off, right?
86 something, yeah. Yeah. 86 something.
Oh, you're right. I will say in episode 86 of Fri-Face,
Jeff proposes the laundromat where he can launder money.
The money laundromat.
Yeah, yeah.
We made a shirt of that.
Good Lord.
Yeah.
That was a cool shirt.
You're right, though, Andrew.
That was a fun fact.
Why doesn't everybody go around the room and share one fun fact?
And then we'll all be a little bit smarter.
Gavin, go.
I don't think a table made for wallpapering makes a very good desk.
Wait, a table made for wallpapering?
Is that a fun fact?
What is a table made for wallpaper?
It's one of those little shitty, like,
chipboard tables that you lie down a piece of wallpaper on
before you put it on the wall.
Disgraceful to sit at.
I've never seen one of those.
Oh, are you never wallpapered?
No.
Oh.
You have?
I think I helped.
I think I helped my dad out when I was about seven or something.
Let me look at one of these walls.
wallpaper tables.
I have no idea what he's talking about.
Would I get wallpaper from a Home Depot?
I've never even thought about where I'd go get wallpaper.
You might have to special order it, but yeah.
Have you ever thought about how you put the glue on?
No.
I thought you just, I thought honestly, until you said it right now,
I thought you got a big roller and glued the wall
and then just stuck wallpaper to it.
Same.
Probably could do that.
Oh, okay.
I mean, it's probably the same, right?
if it's on the paper on the wall?
2025, I imagine wallpaper
self-adhesive, maybe even.
Yeah.
I'm looking at these wallpaper tape.
They look fine.
They kind of look like wrestling tables.
Can you post a wallpaper table
so I can get a look at what we're talking about here?
It just, and Andrew's right,
it does look like something
that the Undertaker will put Stone Cold Steve Austin through.
Absolutely.
But they are narrower.
Is it like a,
are they typically not even or something, Gavin?
or they're like easy to tip over?
There's just nowhere for my legs to go.
I'm just like all crunched up like there's no,
I'm like, it's just shit in the way.
Okay, wait, so you're just using it.
Okay.
Can I ask why?
Are you, why?
How did you get a wallpaper table?
Well, I thought it would be easy
to quickly go and get a desk
without buying one online.
It's super not.
And I ended up going to,
a Home Depot equivalent
and pick it up this bad boy
for 30 pounds.
Wow!
I mean, it's just the leg design
because when you said, like,
I got no room for my legs,
the one that Eric posted is the
WWE style table you'd think of
where it is two things on each end,
zero support in the middle,
where Gavin has more of like a
cross-sectional leg thing.
It's just nowhere. It's not designed to sit at.
No, that's horrendous.
Yeah.
What are you sitting on?
You sitting on a wallpaper chair?
Yeah, what is that?
It's a chair, just a chair.
It's like a vanity chair.
A vanity chair?
Like you'd find it in front of a...
Vanity?
I guess, yeah.
A vanity chair.
I gotta say, America, a bit of a dumpster fire right now.
Things aren't going great.
Haven't been for a while.
Get all the criticism, understand it.
But I feel like 365 days a year, 24 hours a day,
I could get a better table within 15 minutes
anywhere in the country, probably.
I think you're right.
Easy to get a table in America.
I'll say that.
Vanity.
Now I'm looking up vanity chairs.
What is a vanity chair?
Well, I've still got carried away.
I've done my fun fact.
Let's keep going.
Oh, that's a good point.
That's a good point.
Nick, what's your fun fact?
Identical twins don't have the same fingerprints.
Well, I guess that makes sense,
but it makes them not so identical, doesn't it?
Exactly.
And they can't accuse you of a crime you didn't commit.
Well, they can accuse you.
Maybe they can't get in queues, but they won't prove it.
Now, when you picked this wallpaper desk, Gavin, were there multiple wallpaper desks?
Or was that the only one they had?
No, there was, this was one type.
Okay.
And it was just the only table in there in the whole of BNQ.
Huh.
Got any books?
If I got any books?
You can raise it up.
But, Nick, that's like, that is an insane suggestion.
because for it to be his legs to go under all the cross-sectional,
the desk would have to be above his head.
It goes all the way down.
Yeah, I'd be stood up.
He would then have to reach up to do anything on the desk.
Does B and Q stand for Bunce and Quince?
I hope so. I've never looked it up.
What does it stand for?
Bonnie and quail.
There's a desk shop.
There's no D in it.
Yeah, that's my first mistake.
Do they all look like that?
Is that like the traditional B&Q warehouse setup?
Because that, that looks fake.
That old British architecture?
Yeah, well, you got like the gardeny bit, the greenhouse bit.
And then you got the, like, Home Depot bit in the back.
Even the same color as Home Depot.
Yeah, it just looks, it just looks like Home Depot.
Yeah.
Well, it's just something about like the font and the way that it's shaped.
It looks like a pitch image and not a real photo.
It might be a rendering.
Who knows?
What you won't find on top of them either is a British flag.
which you will find an American one on the top of every Home Depot for some reason.
Really? There's flags on Home Depot?
It's because we're proud of the chairs and the tables that we're selling at our Home Depot's in America.
Oh, wow. B&Q's older than Home Depot.
Wow.
I like that there's a sign in there that says, you can do it, like Rob Schneider.
Short for Block and Quail.
Block and quail.
Wow.
Andrew, what's the Home Depot or B&Q of,
Canada.
Ah,
it is
Home Depot.
What was that?
What happened?
Are you okay?
Are you okay, man?
I had to sneeze.
You threw it to me
while I was in the back swing of a sneeze
and there's nothing
I could do about it.
Yeah,
we just have Home Depot.
It's just Home Depot.
We have Lowe's as well.
I don't know if that's Canadian,
but I don't think so.
It's Home Depot.
But we don't have flags.
on our Home Depot.
Well, you probably don't have the table selection
that we do here down in the States then.
You know what, that's a good point.
We did have a hot dog guy,
which I feel like is an essential part
of the Home Depot experience.
I actually wasn't looking,
I should say I wasn't looking for a desk
in a B&Q.
I was looking for a fold-out normal table
before people go apeshit
about why I would actually go there for a desk.
Oh, that's the end.
Right, right.
I didn't have like an office max nearby or whatever.
So you don't have a,
car or you don't drive. So do you
take an Uber to the B&Q
and then they Uber your table
home with you? No.
Oh.
The end.
I went with Dan. Oh, okay.
Okay, that makes sense. Thank you.
Yeah. I like that none of us considered
that he had friends or family there.
Well, he said no and it went like, well,
this is a mystery.
It was just so assert.
with us.
Eric, you got a fun fact for us?
I do.
The raccoon's little bandit mask is actually for anti-glare,
so it's like they're wearing little sunglasses all the time.
Oh, and that's why baseball players do it.
That is, I think they probably,
I don't think they do it because of raccoons,
but they do it in tandem with raccoons.
So yeah.
Solidarity.
Yep.
Yeah, baseball raccoon solidarity.
Andrew.
Now when you went to the B&Q,
yeah.
Was there a hot dog guy in front of it?
Oh!
That wasn't.
Is there any food stands at all?
Like maybe a baked potato man since we're overseas?
Like a bovrilmonger or something?
Oh, a bovromonger.
Yeah, they have a bov-mong outside or what?
God, could we start a bovro monger?
Like a traveling bov trailer?
Bobmong!
I don't think we should call it bov-mong.
No, I think it's fine.
I think it's fine.
Unintentionally offensive is why.
I think it's fine.
Bavril Munger.
And is it like a food truck?
Is that what you're thinking, Gavin?
I think it should be.
It should maybe have like a little foldout awning as well for the rain.
Are people in the fish industry, the only mongers?
Well, the cheese monger.
Oh, there's a cheese.
You're right.
From last week.
I mean, are we pod mongers?
I don't know.
Are we the pod mongers?
Oh, this is a picture of a horse-drawn cart of emergency bovril.
Yeah.
They don't need that.
You can always enjoy bovril.
It keeps.
You know what?
I do appreciate that.
Yeah, you know, in England, that's all it took.
That's all you needed for a sales pitch.
It keeps.
It keeps.
One horse carriage for that bovril.
I'll be honest.
I'm really surprised at the tape on those.
boxes. What do you mean by that, sir? How do you mean? I just didn't think stuff back then had
like cellar tape. Like packing tape? Yeah. I imagine boxes being like twined shut. I didn't imagine
tape. Is that real tape? What year? What year do you think tape was invented? I'm gonna look it up.
Don't nobody else do it. What year? Uh, okay. Well, let's let's think about tape for a minute.
I thought clear plastic tape would be in the last 50 years, I would have guessed.
In the last 50?
No, I don't, yeah, I could see that.
50? 50?
I just think transparent shit was hard.
You had your windows and then like other stuff was difficult.
So you think, you think tape was invented in the mid-70s?
Oh, I guess the last, yeah, I always think it's the millennium.
Do you think Jeff was alive and they made tape?
I was alive when they made, when they invented tape and the high five.
Modern adhesive tape was invented by Richard Gurley Drew at 3M, who created masking tape in 1925.
Oh, wow.
That's actually later than I thought.
I thought it was going to be like 1908.
Adhesives from Treesap and such have been used since 4,000 BC.
Surgical tapes existed in 1845.
I think it's just masking tape was a 1925 invention.
So there were other, uh, oh, clear cellophane tape.
was invented in 1930 by the same dude.
Okay, so it's 30s, not 70s.
Yeah.
All right, decent.
Have you considered using tree sap
to hang your wallpaper, Gavin?
I don't have a sap tap.
A sap tap?
Well, how do you get sap out of something?
Is that a does it do product that I missed?
Don't you tap it in?
I mean, I think it exists already.
Yeah, you tap it in.
It's just the sap tap sounds like
such a great made-for-TV product
is the thing. It's not that you're wrong in anyway.
You're totally right. You do tap it in.
Isn't this like what your country does, Andrew?
Aren't you guys like tapping sap constantly?
Oh, we cannot stop tapping that sap.
We're sap-tap-tapping left and right.
You guys are making molasses and all kinds of stuff, right?
We got maple syrup.
It's kind of the stickiest country.
Oh, there's no way.
That is a great question. That is a fantastic question.
They seem to export a ton of sticky stuff.
That's true.
I guess we do have
Yeah
You know my brain though
Immediately goes to go to like London as the stickiest place
What's sticky about London?
I think Charlie in the chocolate factory is
Is why my brain does that
What?
Wasn't that Germany?
Is it?
Okay, well
The Germany is where I'm thinking
Gene Wilder just feels very British to me
Why?
The American man in Germany?
Oh I mean I know he is very American
he was obsessed with British people.
He loved the British,
and I think he just sort of exudes a British energy.
To me,
I'm not arguing that everyone should feel this way.
I'm just vocalizing.
What do you think is the most British movie he was in?
Charlie in the Chocolate Factory.
What do you think the second most British movie he was in?
Frisco Kid.
I think you might be basing your opinion entirely on one film.
Young Frankenstein.
the one where he wanted to fuck a sheep
I haven't seen that one
Blazing Saddles
Blazing Saddles is a good one
But not British
He doesn't well is he
I don't remember that movie
He just strikes me as a very British man
I don't know what to say
How about a fun fact
Okay fun fact
Let me think
You kind of threw it to me here last minute
Trying to think
No no I think you got
We all had it equally, bud.
You actually had the most time.
Gene Wilder's dad, here's my fun fact,
Gene Wilder's dad didn't want them.
He was against,
he was against pork,
but he loved ribs and he loved bacon.
And this was a puzzling thing to Gene Wilder, his entire life.
Against Paul, how?
Like, he didn't like pigs?
There was a time in which Gene Wilder,
Wilder wanted to buy
pork chops from a store
and his dad was
vocally very against it. He was very upset
by this. And he couldn't figure out why
because they would eat ribs
every week at a restaurant
and he would cook him bacon.
And he finally asked him as an adult.
And the reason was, is because he
doesn't view those things as being from a pig
because he developed
this because his mom hated pork.
But to her, pork
was just pork chops, essentially.
So Gene Wilder's dad's an idiot
He had a very unique views about pork
Do you know what I just realized
If I was looking at a spit roast
Like a hog roast
Like a whole suckled pig spinning around
I wouldn't know which bit to bite
That's the beauty of a suckled pig
It's all good
Yeah
You think there's parts of it you shouldn't bite
Yeah we're not
No I just be like I don't know
Like where the bit I usually eat is
I wouldn't know which bit
would be the best first bite on the animal.
Maybe like above the back leg or something?
You'd think the ass, the part that you go for
for the first thing is the ass?
Gavin said it straight to the ass.
Yeah, he's going ass first.
No, not the ass, just like above the, like over the ass.
Lower back.
Gavin wants to be ass adjacent, but not ass direct.
Do you ever think about that with like a cow?
here's a question
what is the best
pig meat
it's probably
it's probably bacon
don't you think
I really like
pork ribs
ribs are real good
we're talking flavor
well what else
we'll be talking
Nick Nick has
Nick has
are you talking nutritional value
I'm talking nutritional value
it down into categories
like fullness
Nick is opening documents
and going to categories
for what his favorite
pig parts are based on
different criteria
bacon's best flavor
but it doesn't fill you up
it just keeps
saying fullness. Just eat more bacon. What do you mean?
Okay.
You tell my doctor, that.
I like a honey-baked ham,
I must say. But
I think I'd probably pick bacon, too.
Like, if I could only have one piece of pork for the rest of my
life, that piece would be bacon, probably.
Crispy.
It's super crispy. It's still getting me.
Just if you want to get full, eat more
bacon, and Nick's rebuttal
was okay.
I mean, if you insist.
We're talking about one bite of a pig.
You talk about fullness.
Like, it's, it's a mouthful.
Bacon's heavy.
Bacon's heavy.
Like, it's dense?
Yeah.
Salty.
Salty.
What a pig neck tastes like.
That's why you don't like hot dogs.
It's all pig neck.
That's true.
You've had pig neck.
You've had pig neck and pig knee and pig foot.
You've had pig ACL.
You've had pig Achilles.
All the things that sports players tear are you've eaten as a hot.
dog. Pig lap.
Ooh, yeah.
Ooh, pig lap. Pig abs.
Not a lot of animals with laps.
Do you think if a pig
worked out at a gym a lot, it could get
abs?
I don't know that, yeah.
Yeah, you know what? I feel like I've seen muscular pigs.
Yeah, yeah, muscular pigs is probably a thing.
I think I've seen those.
I thought, upright gives you abs.
Is that another made-for-TV product?
Upright.
Upright gives you abs.
It keeps you abs.
Like, does stuff in all fours get abs?
Upright keeps.
Uh, oh, dude, Gavin, you're going to want to eat this.
This is like, this is your territory.
This is right what you were talking about earlier.
That is a muscular pig ass.
That's the other angle.
Gavin wants, I guess Gavin wants E or F on the diagram of this pig.
Why is it so low?
That's a low ass.
well that's a
giant set of balls
oh that's bulls
oh yeah
do you not know the difference
between ass and balls
uh
those
them balls look like us
them balls
look like ass
got so much balls
their ass
you're not wrong
pigs balls
are as big as its head
oh that must be
the ballziest
fucking pig
on the on the whole farm
doing crazy stuff
I mean that pig's fighting horses and whatnot
other farm animals
so a male pig can't sit down
not comfortably
you mean like upright
you couldn't sit at a table
I think it would struggle upright
I think it would sit at a table
maybe not a wallpaper table
but you know like a regular table I bet it could
yeah no room for its legs
there you go I googled muscular pig
sitting down
that's how it would sit
which is right on its balls
I get that
I've sat in that position
I understand
I would love to release
someday a book
it'd be impossible to do
but a book that's just prompts
that we've searched for
on this podcast
like muscular pig
sitting down
is just a page
Andrew why have you sat like that
well sometimes you sit in bed
and you want to kind of like
stretch the back out
and so like
legs left and right
and then you lean forward
I've been there
arms for support
getting cozy
it's a good position
let me zoom in actually
let me I'm looking at this pig
I actually disagree
it's got both feet on one side
that's fucked up
I've never sat like that
I didn't notice that I assumed
it was one leg each side
I've never done the double
leg to the one side
that's fucked
that pig's sitting in one
fucked up way.
Speaking of pig, I have a breakdown of what's
from where. Okay.
Okay. Oh, great. Pork cuts. So we got
side is
pork belly spare ribs, ground
beef, bacon.
Loin is a bunch of things. You got your chops,
your tender loins, your roasts.
Canadian bacon.
Leg slash ham.
Gab, I think you're a leg ham
guy probably. So you're a bone and ham,
smoked ham, smoked ham hawks
kind of guy. I feel like that's the closest to the ass.
I'm just blown away that the Boston butt is on the shoulder.
Wow.
Kind of feels lying, huh?
You lied to?
I've never heard of a blade steak.
That sounds awesome.
A blade steak?
Have you ever seen a blade steak in a supermarket?
Stop saying blade steak.
Blade steak.
Fights vampires.
It's of context as well, Gavin.
Here's the pig and what's where.
So that bustum, bossed butt you got right on the top.
Gavin's a ham boy, big time.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
So I'd be up that, I'd be out that bite in jowl.
Yeah.
I, uh, I like, I really appreciate that they also said, uh, hey, by the way, foot.
If we were into do a draft, if you can, you only live off one pick part section based on this, this meat thing.
It's side.
I think side hands down, number one.
undeniably, the first overall pick.
Spare ribs, pork belly,
bacon, and ground pork.
Is definitely the most versatile,
I would think.
You can do a lot with it.
Yeah, I don't know, man.
There's a lot going on on the loin.
That's what I've been saying.
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight,
nine different cuts of meat out of the loin.
Cubes.
What was the last time you had a pork cube?
I feel like that's the thing that comes with ramen.
Pork cube.
Isn't that pork belly?
I feel like the little like flavor cubes, the pork cube.
Oh.
Like stalk.
I don't know.
I don't know what you mean.
We're doing a big.
Well, we all get one pick, but we have to do it right.
We have to, this has to be an official in episode pig parts draft very quickly just for what everyone gets one pick.
because there's not enough pig parts to go around.
So we have to do a pig parts draft,
but in order to do that,
we have to randomize who goes first,
who gets the first pick.
And this, no snake draft here,
just all the way straight through one to five, that's it.
So how many times are we randomizing?
Eight for eight parts of the pig.
I love it.
One, two, three, four, five,
Jeff Gavin, Eric, Nick Andrew, six, seven,
Andrew, Jeff Gavin, Nick Eric.
Uh-oh.
Hey, Nick, Eric, Jeff, Andrew Gavin.
Very interesting.
Nick, you want me to just write down foot for you to start?
No, no, no, no.
I never had pigs feet.
But I did, I did like Gavin's advice of eat more bacon.
So I'm going with the side.
Okay.
Side's off the board.
Side is off the board.
I think I'm going to go with the loin.
I like the loin.
I think there's a lot to pick from there.
The loin is looking good.
So now we're down to, what, six pig parts here?
Jeff, Jeff, next is your pick on the pig parts draft.
So side and loin are off the board.
I'm going to have to go ham.
Oh, man.
Ham has been taken.
So side, loin, ham.
Andrew, you have the second to last pick on the pig parts draft.
What do you got?
You know that scene in Looper where Paul Deano is getting tortured
and he's older and he's losing parts one by one?
I'm just imagining we're taking sections of this pig.
and now it's just down to spare ribs.
It's just the front half.
Dragon is
it's got no back legs anymore.
Just no, yeah, just the spare ribs and the shoulder.
Well, okay.
I'm not going to take the jowl.
Okay.
Is that, well, do it?
No, no, I don't want it.
Boston butt, I think, is just one type of meat.
It sounds like, it sounds like that's all you're getting from there.
But that also can't be right,
because that's a huge section of pig to be dedicated.
The Boston butt is what you used for like shredded pork and stuff like that, I think.
Oh, I thought Boston butt was like a dish.
Like Polt.
I thought it was like a steak kind of.
Yes, I believe so.
Oh, how yeah.
Carnitas, all that I think is Boston butt.
Oh, well then I got to take the Boston butt all the way.
Okay, Boston butt is off the board.
And Gavin finally, with our final pick on the Pigs Park draft, what you got, Gavin?
What's left?
Spare rib.
I will say if you take the picnic shoulder, it's like front butt.
You can get the front butt, but you can get the fanny.
This Tukis is gone.
I mean, I think I'm going to spare rib.
Spare rib.
Okay.
Spare rib has been taken, boys.
That is the pig parts draft.
Nick has taken side.
I have taken loin.
Jeff has taken ham.
Andrew's taken Boston butt and Gavin takes the spare rib.
Let us know in the comments who had the best pig parts draft from this episode.
Fascinating.
Spontaneous.
Yeah.
You know what?
It just felt right.
It felt right.
I like a little mini draft that doesn't have to be a whole production.
No, no, no.
Just especially with something that's so limited.
The pool is pig.
And so.
The pool is pig.
Yeah.
And so there was only.
So much you can do.
Yep.
There's only so much you can do.
I have a food-related question for Andrew.
Bring it on.
A few episodes ago, you were talking about how you don't mind mayo if it's like a secret.
Yeah, secret mail.
Yeah, absolutely.
What if I dyed mayo red to look like ketchup?
Oh, I'd be all.
Yeah, that's fine.
Totally nice.
Wow, that is a great.
Gavin, that is a great question.
That is phenomenal.
Okay.
Well, um, uh, here, okay.
This is where it's.
Yes, I would have no problem.
I think I would visually have less problem with it,
but I would never use a condiment that said mayo on it still,
even if it was red.
What if it was dyed red in a ketchup bowl?
Oh, for sure, that's fine, because I'm good with aoles.
I just need the label to lie to me.
I love, I've, this is, I've talked about this.
I love an aole.
I love a fancy mayo, but it's not, it's different to me.
I can put a differentiator.
lie to myself that this isn't mayo. This is aioly. So how, like if you had a Hellman's AOLI, would you go
for it? Yeah, absolutely. You just don't like reading the word mayo. I don't like the word mayo. I don't
like how it looks in the thing. It would have to be a squeeze bottle. Opening a jar of mayo and just
looking at the remnants is so gross to me. It just looks terrible. What if, I kind of want to go
through your fridge and dye everything red and put it all in a ketchup bowl. So then I just don't know
what anything is ever?
Yeah, it all looks like different ketchup.
Don't you think it would
fuck with your head, though, to get like...
Well, obviously, man, this is disgusting
and no one should ever eat it.
But, like, let's say if you made mustard red,
but it tasted like mustard,
don't you think it would just confuse you?
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like when you drink something
that you expected to be something else.
Mm.
Oh, that's true.
Yeah, yeah.
It is always jarring when,
like, you have something in can
and it exudes one color,
and then you pour it out,
and it's...
Like, imagine white orange juice that look like milk.
Oh.
That would trip you out.
Would you not have it then, Jeff?
No.
You wouldn't have white orange juice?
I don't think so.
I would if they called it spooky juice.
What if I made your favorite barbecue sauce white?
Yeah, that's fine.
There's white barbecue sauce.
Oh, there is?
Yeah.
That's the thing that exists.
Check and mate.
It's pretty popular.
What if I made your barbecue sauce
brown?
Have you thought about that?
What if your sprite was clear?
I want to try training Jeff on white food.
I don't know whether it's better to make all the white.
Like make all the white food different colors
or make stuff you like white?
The problem is, dude, it's not, I mean, the color,
the color's not great.
But there are white things
that I eat. I'll eat an egg. Boiled egg is white, right? I'll eat ice cream. I'll eat rice,
although I'm not the biggest fan of rice, but I will eat it. I'll eat mashed potatoes. So it's not
purely the color. When I think of, like, for instance, cream cheese or mayonnaise, I think of gross
sicky taste. Okay. So you'd have to make them taste like something else, too. Like, if you could
turn sour cream into ketchup, I would probably, yeah. Like, if you eliminated all,
the color and flavor.
I'll reverse osmosis
mayo into ketchup.
The funniest time
where I'm confronted
with my mayo thing
is if I'm ordering a burger,
let's say like I'm getting
like a door dashed to McDonald's thing.
And
McDonald's maybe using a great example.
But if it has like mayo
on the burger,
I will have a moment where I'm taking other stuff off
and I'll look at the mayo and I know
that I think it'll taste better with it on it.
But I don't like,
approving it. So I just, I have to, I look at it and then I just convince myself, I'm going to
forget that it's there. And then I continue. But there is always a dilemma where I look at it
to opt out of it. And I go, no, and it's better with it on. Are you talking about taking it off
when you order it or like scraping food off? When you order it. So like when I'm ordering a
thing and it's like, I don't want any tomato on this burger. I'll also see a mayo option typically
if the burger has mayo on it. And I will be confronted with, I don't like the idea of no
that Mayo is on this, but I know it will be better with it.
I'll just, actually, I'll leave it, and I'll, I'll just forget.
I'll just force myself to forget.
So you just, you only want secret mayo.
Yeah, if they had, like, you could go onto your account and secretize mayo,
you'd never see it written anywhere on the site.
Absolutely.
Hot, oh my God, what an invention that would be.
I would pay a slight premium for that.
Would you pay an extra dollar per order?
Oh, that's a lot.
No, no, yeah, dollar per order, I think is fair.
Wow.
I'm blown away.
Like a convenience fee?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But they need to make it a secret fee as well.
I can't know about it.
This is going to be a list in fees.
So it can't be itemized.
What if you could just scramble, like, you could obfuscate every ingredient?
Huh.
Like a hamburger blind box?
Like a hamburger would be like one gloom.
two fliggles and one wamp and you would just order it that way.
What's a wamp?
Can I get mine with no wamp?
You could take off or add anything you want.
Huh.
I don't understand any of what you're saying.
You wouldn't know what any of the ingredients were because they've all been like renamed.
Yeah.
Oh, I see.
Oh.
No, that, oh.
I really do not like a tomato.
A slice of tomato.
Slice of wamp?
A slice of wump.
Yeah, I guess I would just learn.
The problem is I'd learn.
Would they swap every time what the wump was?
Would the wump constantly change?
Yeah, I think it would reset daily.
And you would never be able to decode it
unless you ordered a ton in that same day.
What a terrible design for people with allergies to think.
Absolute nightmare.
What if you could put in your allergies?
to your profile and every morning it would say like, oh, avoid the gloggle.
I want to avoid the gloggle at all costs, even if I wasn't allergic.
We got to avoid that gloggle.
Yeah, I like this.
Okay.
I think also in this discussion I'm realizing for how my brain works, you could put all of your
subscription fee as an additional fee and lower the price.
and my brain would be happy about that.
Even if it was the same.
Lower the price of the item, but have a bigger fee.
Yeah, so let's say, let's say like a Netflix subscription,
hey, it's only $2, but then there's $8 a month in fees and services.
And like a buy-line.
Wait, so you prefer hidden fees to knowing the price of something?
No, it's displayed.
Like, if I look at the receipt, it's listed as a part of the fee in service.
But you're only seeing it at the checkout.
Make sure I don't know what I'm doing at all times.
This is, I guess, a strange thing I'm realizing is emphocalizing it.
The product, I think I value the fee and service more than I do the product.
You value the fee and...
What?
Because if I see a fee and service fee and it's whatever amount,
I got, yeah, they got fees, they got services, that's fine.
That's part of this.
So what if Netflix made their subscription $2 a month with a $25 fee every month?
Well, then I wouldn't pay for it.
That's too much money.
I just, I couldn't, I wouldn't afford that.
But if it was what it currently is, actually, I don't even know.
How much is Netflix per month right now?
I pay like $25 a month, I think.
Really?
It's $20.
Well, yeah.
Well, I get like the 4K version or whatever.
I just upgraded.
Did you see Gavin that Netflix is going to be the exclusive home to FIFA the game in this upcoming year?
What?
What does that mean?
That is what I said.
I looked at it and I went, wait.
Are you guys, did you do a deal with FIFA so you're going to stream like FIFA games?
Like real games?
So it would be like watching a FIFA game, but it buffers constantly and the app crashes?
Yeah, exactly.
Okay.
And Jake Paul will be there.
Exactly what it seems like.
You'll be able to play FIFA on Netflix, I bet.
That's what it is.
So I read into it.
But it's weird because EA doesn't make FIFA anymore.
They lost the license.
So it is a different developer that has made a FIFA game.
And it's exclusively going to be available to play via Netflix.
What am I pairing my controller to?
I don't know.
The Apple TV?
Maybe it's a remote game.
I don't know.
So,
WWE has something like this right now,
but I don't know,
I think it's,
I don't know how you play it
or what I've never played it
or seen it or whatever,
but it is a WWE game
on Netflix,
and I assume you just use your remote control
to hit buttons,
or you play it on your phone.
I assume it's on your phone.
How do you develop for something that's on so many,
it's like all kinds of different hardware?
I guess PC gaming is the same.
But surely Netflix baked into some dog shit TV OS is going to run worse than an Nvidia Shield or something.
It was very confusing because they said just in time for the World Cup, FIFA coming to Netflix games.
And I was like, what the fuck does that mean?
Is Netflix games the sub-brand of like their sports?
But no, it's just a new FIFA game not made by EA exclusively playable.
on Netflix.
Sounds like a mobile game
got ported to Netflix.
Yeah.
I mean, it might be developed for Netflix,
but it's the same principle, I bet.
I just opened up
the Netflix app
to look at
the game thing.
If I can find the WWE thing
really quick.
And the first thing I'm confronted with
is their mobile game section,
which is, I think,
just crazy for them to lead with.
And the first thing
in the mobile game section
is Red Dead Redemption.
Imagine
playing Red Dead Redemption for the first time on your phone via Netflix.
What an insane experience.
Who is that person?
Oh, they got 2K25.
So it's just like only on mobile on Netflix?
Yes.
Is there multiplayer?
I don't know.
I don't think they've said.
Like you want to get a posse going on Netflix?
Hey, what's your Netflix code?
I want to do a fucking Netflix multiplayer.
player let's play.
HDCP there.
Ah, yeah.
The games and I'm just looking at the
Netflix library of games.
And it is quite the
Narcos Cartel Wars Unlimited.
Wow, that feels like it belongs on your GTA
heist wheel.
I think that sounds like a Facebook game.
It sure does.
It's like the most Farmville-ass title.
Kevin, have you ever been to Crispy Street?
That's a name.
of a game on here and that feels like you could have visited.
You could have bought a pie on Krispy Street.
How do we not do that for Advent?
A Krispy Street pie?
I'd love a crispy street pie.
Is it not a game?
Oh, it is a game.
It's a puzzle game.
Okay.
I didn't know what Advent you were talking about.
I thought you were talking about it because I said pie
and then you said, why didn't we do that for Advent?
I thought you meant last year's Advent
where you ate a bunch of stuff.
Oh.
Nah.
Now when you went into the B&Q,
Was there a big line or was it relatively quiet?
Pretty quiet.
And did anyone ask what you're going to do with your table?
No.
I mean, do you usually ask people why they're buying something?
Yeah, that's what I do in line.
If I'm in line, I'll just look back.
It's not.
A guy with 18 toilet rolls under his arm.
What are you doing?
That would be the most annoying person to be in line with at a grocery store.
They just turn around and start asking,
what you're doing with every item in your cart.
Oh, oh, you got some strawberry yogurt?
What's that about?
You're not a blueberry guy?
That sounds like such a realistic future, though.
I want, I want this to happen to Gavin one time.
Just like, go through, like, fry style go down my receipt, asking me about all of it.
It's like that experience you were telling me a couple weeks ago, Eric, I don't know
if we ever talked about it on camera, but you were talking about it was Gavin's worst ever day,
if it would have happened to him.
What was it?
I'll tell you what it was.
I was going to, I was going to, yeah.
I thought I was just teeing you up for it, but you were getting coffee.
No, I totally forgot.
This happens to me all the time, so it doesn't.
You were getting coffee at Des Nudo.
Oh, dude.
And I would hate this.
Oh, Gavin, Gavin, we never would have heard the end of it.
It would have, like, fundamentally changed the way that you operate.
I got a haircut, and then on my way into the office, I'm like,
I'm going to stop and get a cup of coffee.
it does newdo.
So I was second line.
It was cold out.
It's fine.
Not a problem.
The person in front of me
was having a conversation
with like the barista.
It's inside of like a little like food truck.
And they have like an extended conversation.
Like it goes for like a little while
where I'm just going like, man, the order's like done.
This is that.
Whatever.
It's fine.
Maybe they just know each other.
It's not a big deal.
The guy steps out of line.
He's done.
up and the
pharista goes
brother
it's going on today
I just went
oh you know
you know
just keep
just keeping it
yeah
just keeping it warm
and he's like yeah
I hear that
cold out there
yeah
yeah
yeah cold out here
and he's like
well
what you're thinking
and I'm like
I just
large black coffee
and he's like
all right
nothing else
right easy
I'm like yeah easy
he's like yep
just a big cup of Joe keeping you warm.
Yep, absolutely.
Yeah.
So what you got going on today?
Oh my God,
it's still happening.
And he's like filling it up the slowest
you can fill up a cup of coffee,
just from like the drip.
It's not,
he's not like making it.
It's just from the drip.
And I'm like, oh, you know,
just going to work, keeping it warm.
Oh, yeah, you know it.
And this is going to keep you warm.
Yeah, no, I know.
Yeah, absolutely.
And then he, I do, like, we feel.
finish the transaction, and then he hands me the coffee.
And he goes, oh, hey, actually, one second, can you do me a favor?
And I went, oh, yeah, what is it?
And he went, have a good day.
And I went, got it, man.
And then he reached out for a fist bump.
I fist bumped him.
I walked away, and I think that I didn't even make it to my car before I messaged.
I just had an interaction that would kill Gavin.
I had the opposite experience in a coffee shop to that yesterday where I was buying some Christmas
presents and I stopped at a Medici coffee.
A little local coffee chain.
Not a big fan of, but it was where I was at.
So I walked in.
And I was fourth person in line.
And the guy was talking to the first person in line was a girl,
which kind of a young girl and kind of a young guy.
And he was talking to her.
And I thought, oh, my God, it took forever.
And I thought, this guy's hitting on this girl or whatever.
This is going to take so fucking long.
And it did.
And they had this entire conversation.
And then the next person to go up was just like a normal looking dude.
And then they had a conversation.
I was just on my phone after a while.
because I just fucking couldn't believe
it was still going on.
And then it gets up to the person in front of me,
which is an old lady,
when I think, oh, I'm great.
He's not going to hit on her.
And then he, I swear to God,
she walks up and he goes, Carol, oh my God,
did you change your hair?
And she goes, I got it, died.
And then they had this whole conversation,
this, like, 25-year-old barista dude
and this lady who was like maybe 62.
And I was just in, I was dumbfounded.
It may have taken, like,
literally like 12 minutes for him
to get through these four people or three people.
And then he comes up to me,
and I have no idea
but expect and he goes, what do you want?
And I was like, oh, let's take a cold bird.
He's like, all right, that'll be four bucks.
The fucking zero kindness towards me.
It was the craziest thing I've ever seen.
I've never felt less like a local in my life.
Wow.
I mean, that's the ideal version for me, for sure.
Yeah.
But, wow.
And it was great for me, too, if I hadn't seen the first three people go through it.
Because then you're like, what's wrong with me?
Well, you got to go back.
You got to establish a rapport with this guy.
I will not.
Well, if you want the experience...
I'm not going to put that level of work in.
I just get so uncomfortable.
Because I feel like even if I'm doing something cool,
I don't know how to even say it to someone.
Like if someone's like, oh, what are you up to?
My answer is always like, not much or nothing or get me out of here.
I can't imagine saying what I'm actually doing.
We should craft a lie for you.
So you have a better answer.
You're going to go,
something about laundry tomorrow?
doesn't do want me.
That's exactly my exact mindset.
I mean, I'm just like,
pick out, think of anything.
Be,
wallpaper.
We talked about it when we did the gingerbread advent thing,
where Dilbot was going to run over all of the gingerbread stuff.
And we went to the grocery store.
And I just made small talk with like the woman at checkout.
And I think Gavin went,
I just want to follow Eric.
and see what all of his interactions are like.
I actually want to just walk behind you with a clipboard
and just like write down go-to sentences,
like little quick pivots of just like,
just inane sentences that just go so far in society,
but mean nothing.
Yeah.
I just don't,
I don't understand how you don't just have like a roster of those.
Like I don't,
you just don't have those on standby?
I got nothing.
Wow.
We got to drill Gavin with this.
That's like a skill.
you never developed.
I wonder if that's just like,
if that's just like being British
or if it's something specific to you.
Interaction?
Yeah, I don't know.
Like, is that just how British people
walk around London and in England
just not having inane small talk?
Or like, is that a cultural thing?
Or is Gavin just uniquely bad at it?
No, it's got to be a double whammy.
Do you want to set it up?
Yeah.
Do you want to, uh, let's act up?
scenario, I'm a guy driving you to work in a car in the morning.
I'm gonna have a little small pot.
So did you hear, did you know that bees or, uh, they sting?
Yeah.
I was trying to keep you awake.
He's snored.
That was my wake up.
That you, bees!
If you just shouted, ah, bees.
I was once, I think I was at the Austin airport,
or some other airport, ordering A.B's ice cream.
and the guy
Yeah, that'll be this one, wouldn't it?
The guy just comes back with a bowl of ice cream
and he just says,
what's wrong with it?
And I was like, what?
It's like, what's wrong with the ice cream?
And he was asking me, what do I want on it, I guess?
What?
What?
I get what he's saying.
Like, how do I make this better for you?
Oh.
What topic was like, or something?
That's a fucking crazy way to say.
I just thought it was insane.
I don't know.
You're the, you're the only.
expired?
Expired? Is it on the board?
Like, he's like family feud with you.
He just asked everything in the weirdest way,
and then he gave me back my card and receipt
covered in ice cream.
And I just, I think that was the last time
I ever ordered ice cream there.
That is not on you.
I was in like 2013 or something.
That is completely on them.
That is somebody who does not know how to do small.
There's two people that don't smallpox.
But they're initiating, which is crazy.
Yeah.
I think we could develop some,
some like two or three sentence go-toes for you.
Yeah.
I need like a little tiny,
like a pocket book of stuff.
Okay.
So like if somebody,
say,
say you're at the store
and somebody says,
hey,
how's your day been going?
Not bad.
How's yours?
But,
right,
but now you're like,
now there's like more interaction there.
You got to like say something.
See,
I think you got to say something
that like kind of makes sense.
but if you don't, like, if you think about it, it really doesn't.
Like, you just, like, if someone were to ask me how my day's going and I'm at the grocery
store, I just go, oh, you know how it is?
Wake up every day, punch that time clock.
That's right.
All right, hold on.
Let's try this.
I'm working at H-EB and you're buying, I don't know, the hemorrhoid pets.
Yeah.
And you're checking, like as you normally do.
Hey, how's it going, my man?
How you doing today, big guy?
Good thanks.
Nice, nice.
What's, uh, what's you're getting up?
to today in Austin.
Oh, what?
Working hard or hardly
working, which is it going to be today?
Yeah, what?
There was a car that could
come and crash through the front of the store
right out.
I so wish that there was a
place that offered
discounts if you small-talked.
That there was like a higher
baseline price, but if you small-talked
and had a nice little chat,
you could get reductions.
It's like fill a bar, and then the
The discounts roll in.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's like $3 off the item.
I would go to a place that was the opposite.
They give you discounts if you talk less.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, but that's no fun for what we're imagining with Gavin.
I want Gavin to have to small talk awkwardly as much as possible.
That's what brings me joy.
Gavin quietly shopping.
I don't want that.
Yeah, I need like an Eric phrasebook.
So, you know, waking up, punching the clock or whatever you said.
What's the other one?
Punking up.
Punching the clock.
Oh, you can say wake up every day, punch that time clock, and then they go, I hear that.
And then like, you know, because that's just sort of like a thing.
And then you can say, if somebody's asking you, how is it going, you just be like,
oh, you can say, oh, you know, just being like Fred Savage treating every day like the Wonder Years.
And then they'll just, yeah.
And they'll just go kind of like, because that, like, what do you say to that?
Nothing.
Now do the same, Gavin, but with a British reference.
say like, oh, wasn't his sister Olivia Diabo?
I always liked her.
Is that what they would say?
So it's like a small talk, Uno Reverse.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's what you're trying to do.
You're just trying to get the onus off of you.
So that's the end of it.
I should just think, what would Eric say?
All right, hit me with a piece of small talk.
Hey, hey, my man, how's your day been going?
Number one with a bullet.
That's it.
That's it.
That's the dude.
Honestly, number one with a bullet?
Not bad.
That works.
Talk to you again after that.
Yeah.
What's even mean?
You just became, I'll tell you what it means.
It means you just, you just graduated to Eric.
Yeah.
I mean, do you say something like that because it sounds like something a normal person would say,
but there's not really anything like they don't have anything to say back.
If you don't offer something back to them and what you're giving them is number one with a bullet,
they got nothing.
And you're scot-free.
But I just, I don't yet have the formula to come up with.
with a new one.
All right, hit me with something.
Hit me with a piece of small talk, go.
What's you planning on doing today?
Slice in the street up.
Oh, man, you feel that.
Don't do that.
Don't do that.
See, it's hard to come up with them.
Live in the dream.
I'm trying to invent new ones, though.
Oh, you're inventing new ones.
Can I suggest another tactic for you as well, Gavin?
well, Gavin? Yeah. Let's you and I say, I'll be you and, uh, and, uh, you be the, the person
initiating small talking. Hey, how's your day going? No English.
Just pretend you don't know the language. Yeah, but here's what's going to happen to me though.
Okay, uh, we'll do that again. How's your day going? No English. Aren't you Andrew though
from regulation?
Ah, somebody thinks highly of themselves.
Is that used in character or are you saying that to me now?
I'm saying that to you now.
You're at the B and Q?
You think you're going to get a slow-mo guys?
You look like them.
It's not hard.
That happens all the time.
I can't pretend I'm foreign.
No, you can.
You just look like them.
Try the, all right, try the no English thing with me.
All right, here we go.
Hey, how's it going, buddy?
You haven't a good day so far?
No English.
No English.
Well, tell Dan I said hi, big fan.
When you say no English with the British accent.
Sorry, old chap, don't speak any English.
It's really something, man.
Yeah, you'd have to change the accent.
You couldn't do a British, no English.
My face is the thing that I can't change, though.
I mean, with plastic surgery, you could.
Do you, now, do you, with these exercises that we've gone through so far, Gavin,
do you feel like you are in any way better prepared to go out into the world now?
Like, do you think this has helped?
I think I'm gaining the confidence to try random sentences.
For sure.
Here's the, okay, the problem is that this is on the podcast.
If you pulled the no English card,
I would think as the person, I would think I saw someone who looks exactly like Gavin,
but clearly isn't Gavin because Gavin knows English.
it wouldn't that seems more likely to me
than I'm interacting with Kevin
and he's pretending he doesn't speak the English language
you think someone who looks like me
saying no English with my voice
they'll just think oh it must look like him
I well you'd have to modify the voice a little bit
you put a little effort in
you got to you perform a little bit
a slight amount
take like 80% of the effort
you put in the laser
team and put it into the no English.
Okay.
And you could, I think, persuade some people.
Hmm.
Have you ever been recognized only from laser team?
I feel like I've asked this before.
That would be crazy.
That would be such a wild that, like, they have no other points of reference for
anything you've done.
They've only seen Laser Team.
No, I don't think so.
That would be amazing.
Aren't you Woody from Laser Team?
Yeah.
Was that your name?
No English.
No English.
Go to the Colette.
Just go, no Russian.
I'm trying to think if I was going to list
iconic Woody's, how far
down Woody from Laser Team would be.
Oh.
Oh, should we do a Woody draft?
Yeah.
You got a woodpecker.
You got a toy story.
Harrelson.
Should I put it on the list of drafts we should do?
I don't know that there's not wood.
But we can look into it.
What?
Wood not wood.
Would not would.
You also might have thrown.
I was going to suggest it earlier, but we flew past it.
But a pig draft might not be a bad idea.
I thought of a lot of pigs in my head while we were doing that.
Oh yeah, there's some great pigs.
So just straight up, just a pig draft.
Yeah, pig draft.
Just a pig.
Like, like, pig virus from Howard Stern.
Porky the pig.
Babe.
Pig iron.
Et cetera, et cetera.
Oh, you want a fun fact about babe?
Yes. James Cromwell is in that movie. Right. He's the guy. He's the, he's the farmer guy. His dad was a farmer. And he never really got to see the peaks of his acting career. He passed before he hit his like stride essentially. And when he was filming Babe, he realized that he was in essentially the exact same outfit his dad wore. And he saw his reflection.
while filming that scene
of the that'll do
that'll do whatever
whatever he says
pig
that'll do
and for him
that was like seeing his dad
essentially acknowledging his career
like he was
he knew that that was a great movie
and that that was a good role
and he looked like his dad
and so he saw the reflection
and for him it was like closure
of his dad
seeing what he had accomplished
and approving of it
How old was James Cromwell in this moment?
17.
What did Babe come out?
1995?
I couldn't.
James Cromwell is like the type of guy where he could have been 60.
He was like 55.
He was like 55.
It's a weird, weird age to still be seeking your dad's approval.
Especially that late into his career.
If you never got it.
I guess.
Wow, he's six for seven.
That's a tool man.
Wow, really?
That's way too tall.
Bet you he's like 6.5 now.
Six to work, maybe.
People shrink when they age.
That's true.
That's true.
Did you guys know that there was a period of time
when England was run,
what was puritanical,
where it was illegal to sing Christmas carols?
What?
Yeah, it was, you were only,
it was, uh,
uh, Sundays were the only liturgical days.
That was the only day.
you were allowed to celebrate Christ in any way.
So if you were singing Christmas carols
or celebrating Christmas outside of church
on a Sunday, that was considered a sin.
I read all about this morning.
Was this when Scrooge was president?
Did you say president or present?
President.
Oh, I think it was when he was president.
Yeah, he was president of England, yeah.
Yeah, I remember that.
Absolutely.
That was before tape.
Is there a president of England, Gavin?
No.
Because Ireland has a president.
A different country?
has a president? Yeah, Ireland has
a president. Aren't
you like a citizen
of like the British Commonwealth, Andrew?
Yeah, it's technically
yeah. We don't have
a president though, but Ireland does.
So does, I mean,
so is France. Is it like a real president or is a fake president?
The fuck does that mean?
Because, well, Ireland has a fake president
where their president isn't actually the head of the country.
It is like a
essentially like you're the mascot of the country
from my understanding. You have like no essential
political influence and you're actually not allowed to leave the country
if you're the president of Ireland while you're president.
You can't go out of, you can't do like foreign
negotiations of it? From my understanding.
How confident are you in all of this?
85% sure.
Wow, 85 is pretty high. 85 is pretty high.
Listen, it's a better grade than I ever got in high school.
so I'm gonna I'm gonna trust you.
It was purely based on
this sort of falls apart.
No, no, this is where this is
cemented in the fact.
Potter McGregor wanted to become president of Ireland
and people were like, that's not, you don't understand
how any of this works.
You're basing it off of you just understand
American politics in their system.
You don't understand how the hierarchy
actually works here.
President is not in control of the country
in any way. It is essentially a mouthpiece.
position.
If you could be a mouthpiece for anything,
what would you be a mouthpiece for?
Like the spokesperson for something.
Oh, what would I advocate?
The way did I mask is something I use every day
and I really enjoy and I lose it sometimes.
And it does make a significant impact
in my sleep when I don't have it.
Do you only have one?
I only have one and I wake up often in a pair.
of having to do something.
Day starting, I go, ah, and I rip my head mask off,
and I'll just, I'll lose it.
Head mask. Why don't you just get a five-pack?
I could, I guess.
I got this one as like a Christmas gift,
and it was a little, it was like 50 bucks,
so I'm not going to get five of them.
Oh, wow. I want to say.
Yeah, there was a Christmas, I think last year maybe,
where I was like, I'm going to really focus in on sleep.
that will be the thing that everything I ask for is about sleep optimization.
Put an air tag in it.
Yeah, do I need an Apple thing for an air tag to work?
I don't know.
Because if I just have the Apple air tag and no other Apple products, I might be in trouble.
You have an Apple laptop, don't you?
No, it's gone.
Oh.
And I had an IMAQ from 2013, and it's retired.
I probably wouldn't have worked anyway.
No, probably not.
I couldn't use Google on it anymore.
I couldn't update it
I couldn't use slack
on the brow
It was a whole thing
No way air tag
It doesn't even know what an air tag is
I'd have to teach it what an air tag was first
Well what if it was my air tag
And if you lost your eye mask
I could tell you where it was
Oh
I like that
I like that a lot
As long as it's kind of near
An iPhone in the building
I think it would work
Well do air tags make beep noises
Yeah I can beep them
Okay, well then yeah, that works
We could do that
You'd have to be prepared to get a lot of texts
Saying hey, I need my mask
I like that I would always know
I would always know where your bed was
Yeah, yeah you would
As long as it beeped
I lose my phone all the time and I needed a beep
We should, Eric's telling us we should wrap this up
Before we do, can I
Can I get a ruling on something real fast?
Yeah, of course
Now it's a pointless ruling
But it's more for edification
because I wasn't going to use it either way.
But when Emily and I were out this morning
and we stopped at P. Terry's, I was starving.
And I grabbed an breakfast, right?
And the only thing they have at P. Terry's for breakfast
is an egg burger is what it's called.
Here's a picture of the menu right there.
Now, the egg burger is a hamburger bun
with, in my case, it had fried egg
and pepper jack cheese and bacon on it.
And on the menu, it's called a burger.
Emily asked me, are you going to count that as a burger?
And I said, absolutely not.
And she said, but it's called a burger on the menu, so you should be able to.
And I was like, I think correct.
I think I should be able to count this as a burger.
But it feels against the spirit of the competition, not a competition.
It feels against the spirit of what we're doing.
And so I decided not to count it.
But what, I would have been right to, I'm not done it either way.
But I would have been right to count it because it's listed as a
burger on a menu, right?
It's listed as a burger on a menu.
I think our classification was you kind of know it a burgers.
That looks like a burger.
It's a burger on the menu.
Even though it has no ground beef for Patty or anything.
Yeah, totally.
Absolutely.
Okay.
Yeah, I thought so too.
But once again, I'm not going to count it because I just, it just doesn't, I don't know.
It's not what I was thinking of.
I understand.
Yeah.
I wouldn't, I wouldn't even venture.
I wouldn't even venture to count it.
I wouldn't even think to count that.
Well, maybe it needs to be slightly.
less. Like, it counts,
but if you had 10, it would only count
as 9.
I get so confusing.
We already have the slider scale we got to deal with.
That's true. The slider scale does
already throw a curve in it all.
Okay, well, thank you. So I feel like
my instincts were correct there. Yeah, you're absolutely
great instincts, but if somebody did count it, that
would be fine, too. It would be fine. But once
again, personally, I'm not going to
count it. Absolutely. It's what you want your list to be.
All right. We appreciate it. Also,
not a competition.
Not a competition.
It's not in the slightest.
It's just a count.
And I'm thinking maybe I need to back off on some hamburgers in the new year because I'm, you know, getting cold.
I'm not riding my bike.
And suddenly I'm packing on weight.
And I'm like, why are these jeans tight?
And then I went, oh, 41 hamburgers and two words.
Speaking of in the new year, can we do a countdown so people can listen to this?
10.
Because this comes out.
9.
8.
7.
six, five, five, four, three, three, two, one.
Happy 26.
Wow, incredible, happy new year.
Thank you so much for listening to Regulation for an entire year.
Boy, do we appreciate it.
And we have so much ahead to delight and entertain you with in 26.
Just don't ask what it is because we don't know yet.
And then we should put on the description, like, start this episode at like 10.50 something p.m.
Yeah, it's okay.
Start this episode at 1050 something p.m.
You got it.
All right, guys, we're locked in.
We'll see you next time.
Bye.
We'll see you next time.
Bye.
I love you.
