Regulation Podcast - Eggs Amongst Friends // Phone Number Confusion [88]

Episode Date: January 14, 2026

Geoff, Gavin and Andrew talk about Michael Irvin, retired numbers, Andrew gets to the bottom of more, Vanderpump Rules, Group 7, pecan, egg sandwich, eggs on the beef scale, Warhammer, messy Geoff, generational lameness, MarcTheFrog, FreddyTheAlligator, frog spawn, easy cheese, small grinch socks, stuck in a car, no car internals, ownership, social emergency, 811 vs 911, phone number confusion, Coin Czar, and aqua bulldozer. Sponsored by Zocdoc. Go to Zocdoc.com/regulation and download the Zocdoc app to sign-up for FREE and book a top-rated doctor.  #sponsored Support us directly at https://www.patreon.com/TheRegulationPod Stay up to date, get exclusive supplemental content, and connect with other Regulation Listeners. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello and welcome to another episode of the Regulation Podcast. My name is Jeff Ramsey with me as always. Andrew Panton, Eric Badoor, Nick Schwartz, Gavin Free. This is episode 88. And that got me thinking, who's the most famous athlete that's worn the number 88? And I looked it up. Oh, I'm terrible. I think it's Michael Irvin.

So this is the Michael Irvin episode of Regulation. I'm so glad you have to do some Coke, stab somebody with scissors, whatever you need. I'm kidding. Dude, if you've seen him recently. Recently, he's out of control. Dude. He's never been in control. His life has been defined by being out of control.

Who did him with scissors? Oh, who did he do with scissors? A teammate, he stabbed the scissors once in the locker room. Did they ask to be stabbed with scissors? I don't think so. Oh, man. I'm not making that up, right? That happened.

No, no, I'm pretty sure that happened. He's just been, dude, the last couple weeks, he has been on one. Like, I know he's been on one for a while, but dude, he is on. on one. I'm bummed. I didn't have the idea to look up an athlete who corresponds to the episode number

until so late in the game. We're gonna tap out at 99. We can't go any further. Well, you can just start over. Just start. Ignore the one and just go from zero zero, Gilbert Arenas

and go all the way through. In the hundreds, I can just relate episodes to my favorite vaults in Fallout. Oh, that's pretty short. You know, in sports, sometimes when someone dies, they'll retire the number.

Yeah, yeah. Like number six in the NBA. Is there a team anywhere where every number has been retired? No. I don't think so. I don't think so. But if they're, the Celtics are getting up there, man. It's getting pretty dicey.

They just have to start using Les. Yeah. That's interesting. What team has the most retired numbers? Do you think it's the Celtic? I don't know. That's a great question. Should we look it up?

One team. I'm pretty sure it's the Yankees, isn't it? I was thinking about this the other day. and I'm pretty sure they're up in like the 20s. It would make sense that it was baseball. We're so smart. Listen to this. The New York Yankees have the most retired numbers

in North American professional sports with 22, followed closely by the Boston Celtics in the NBA with 24. Well, that would be more than 22. What was it? Like a team plane crash, what happened? Oh, because the Celtics include zero and zero, and so some people don't consider that. So it's either tied or yeah.

I see. Gavin, do you think a retired number is from a person who dies? Is it not? It's... Derek Jeter, no, Derek Jeter just got his number retired, I think, for the Yankees, and he is very much alive. So if you're just really good as well, you could retire a number? That's how it happens.

I mean, it's not even... Okay, so you're saying as well as if the other way is more prevalent, and it's not. What? I've only heard of people dying and they're retired. tie the number out of like respect. No. No. I can't think of a case in which that has occurred. So many people have died in baseball

are the numbers would look like phone numbers by now. They'd have to do like V2. Numbers V2. All the V1. Guys, I'm not a big. I'm not a big sports guy. I never considered that it's only that

that's so funny, dude. Holy shit. That's so funny. I legitimately thought that was the only reason they retired number. So you thought nobody who had their number retired knew that they had their number retired. Oh, wow. Yeah.

It's just, it's a ceremony. It's a ceremony in which no people that are ever honored have attended. Yeah. What's the point of being alive and no one can use your number? Give it up. Give it back. Put it back in the pool. I want.

Yeah. Evans version of things. I want them to have to bury the player in the field and the number is raised while the casket is lowered. I'm very into that. I love thinking baseball. You have to get buried at your position. You retire the number and they bury.

Derek Jeter gets buried six feet deep at short stuff. Has the mound ever been a person? What? What? I don't think so. The plate? Has the mound ever been a person? Yeah, is there if anyone under that?

What? I don't think so. Isn't there the rumor of the jets, though? Is that the jets or the giants with the body in the field causing the lump or whatever? Oh. Jimmy Hoppa. Something like that.

I think it's interesting. I thought you literally meant buried. I thought you meant like somebody was cremated and they turned their ashes into a plate. No, he definitely meant full-ass buried, yeah. Yeah, like, they are the cause of the mound. So you're like really not a sports guy. You're like, you're like really not a sports guy.

I've just thrown out ideas, you know? I feel like he heard the movie title Angels in the Outfield and then created a whole narrative around it that had nothing to do with the plot of that movie. I feel like instead of sport, you know, we did the sports improvement draft. We should do Gavin's sports misconception draft. But we don't know what he doesn't know until he knows what he doesn't know

And I don't know what that is It would have to be like going through sports And being like explain Just how does this work? Tell me how this works This whole podcast is based around We don't know what Andrew doesn't know though That's true

And here we are learning about you as well So that's exciting Oh yeah I'm on the podcast too I love this podcast man We haven't recorded in three weeks now maybe It feels like at least two.

And I didn't. This is not where I saw it going. Uh-uh. This is, I had no clue. I have a whole list of things I need to get to the bottom of speaking of things they don't know. Same here. We got a ton of stuff. But why don't you,

why don't you hit start it off, Andrew? Let's get to the bottom of something. There are things that I, like, I can look these up, but it's like, I feel like I'm just waiting for the universe to clarify for me. First thing on my list, Vanderpump rules. Or is it the rules of Vanderpump? Or is it like Vanderpump is, like, Vanderpump is awesome?

It's the rules of Vanderpump. Yeah, Vanderpump rules. That's sort of, oh, I didn't know. I've never seen it. I just am aware of it. Vandre Pump rules. Yeah, no, it's like the rules of working for Lisa Vanderpump, kind of. I might have this written incorrectly, because it's been a little bit, but there was a time

where my, like, algorithm was all about, I think it was group seven. I don't know where that came from. I don't know what that is. There are apparently other groups. I don't know, any of that. I've been waiting for it to explain to me what it is. I can answer that if you'd like. Go ahead.

All right. So somebody on TikTok one night decided to do a social experiment where they made, I think, eight videos, but at least seven. And said, the first video was like, congratulations, if you're watching this video, you are in group one. Congratulations, if you watch this video, you are in group two. They did, I think like I said, seven or eight of those. And then for whatever reason, the seventh one is the one that got shared.

shared virally in it. Everybody ended up in Group 7. But it was just a social experiment for somebody to see what would happen. It's a way more compelling thing than I thought it would be. Yeah, people latched on to the idea of being a part of Group 7

and it kind of became a joke of itself and, you know, it was all tongue and cheek. Oh, that's, we're flying through these. That was a great explanation, Jeff. No problem. My last two. Pecan or Pecan? I never know.

Pecan. I never know what to say. Hang on. Hang on. Gavin? Piquin. Nope, thank you. But that's a weird third

pronunciation that makes no sense. I'll add it to the list. That was great. So excited to find that out. That was great. And my last one, data or data? Yeah. I think if they're interchangeable.

Yeah, I think it's fine. Nah. Okay. Nay. Nah or nay. Here's the thing. You're the tech guy, Gavin, but you also thought that people buried

athletes and stadiums like 30 seconds. I don't know. I didn't think that was all the mounds. I was just wondering if any of the mounds were a person. Out of respect. Out of... That's fair. That's fair. Well, I guess 2026 is done now. Those are all my questions of the year. I'm set. I've figured it all up. Should 2026 be the year of nay instead of now? Nay? What are we horses?

That feels so like tip my hat, milady, that I just don't even want to broach it. Yeah, sounds a little bit like, like fedora. Yeah. It sounds pretty fedora. It sounds fedora? Yeah. There's a guy listening to this right now, driving hearing us say that,

and he's going, oh, shit, I got to stop saying nay. Oh, shit. Oh, Christ. I had an egg sandwich the other day. They became a whole thing. You guys want to hear an egg sandwich story?

I need to. Well, I have so many questions. What type of egg is an egg sandwich? Is it a sandwich? scrambled egg sandwich? You know what? That's a valid question and we'll get into it.

I'm a big egg sandwich fan. I eat a lot of egg and bacon and cheese and jalapeno is like tip top to me. Scramble egg sandwich? Anytime I see, who said scrambled? Andrew.

Okay. I'm not saying scrambled. I'm just saying egg. So anytime I see an egg sandwich, I tend to go for it, right? Sometimes it's scrambled. that's fine. Sometimes it's fried usually. I went to a place called Canter Cafe the other day to buy myself, to treat myself to breakfast because I was out running errands. I went to the post office. I did a bunch

of stuff for us. And I was like, I'm hungry and I deserve to eat it. I'm going to take myself out to a diner. So I went and I sat down at the diner by myself. We're going to read a book and just spend about a half an hour there eating breakfast. I saw they had an egg sandwich. It said the egg was over medium on the sandwich, which I thought was weird. I thought, have I had an over medium egg sandwich? Oh yeah. I don't know that I have, but actually over medium is my preferred way to eat an egg. Like if I was to order two eggs and toast or something, I would get it over medium.

Nick knows what I'm talking about. Yeah. Are eggs on the beef scale? Over medium? Is there other mediums? Yeah. There's over easy or over medium or... Eggs on the beef scale.

I know what he's saying. Like medium rare? Medium. Yeah. Yeah. They are like a well done egg. Oh, okay. I see.

So over medium looks to be a drippy egg, but over medium, a small amount of trip. Over hard. Okay. So I get the sandwich. I get the sandwich. It's cut in half.

I pick it up. It's a fucking meaty sandwich. I'm excited about it. I put my book down for a second, and I have reading glasses that, because I'm fucking old now, when I read, I've been taking,

I've been taking fucking reading glasses with me when I go places to read at restaurants. I'll see a picture. Uh, no, that's okay. Catch me. I'll tell you what, catch me at the restaurant by myself reading a book and, uh, reading the fucking Warhammer 40K novel that Mark the Frogs, Mark the Frogs making me read. Uh, and you'll see me in glasses.

Anyway, so I put my glasses down. I put my, my book down. I put my phone down and all like in a pile on top of each other. I had headphones on, uh, just to like block out the noise. And so I took my headphones off and I set them down too. And, uh, I take a big bite out of the, the first bite of the sandwich, and I put the sandwich down and my hands are covered in egg yolk. And I'm like, oh, fuck, this is a messy sandwich. No big deal. I grab my napkin and I wipe

my hands. And by the time I've got my hands clean from the first bite of egg, the napkin's gone. It's just a mess. It's just a yellow mess. So I have to go, I have to ask for another napkin. The lady brings me two napkins, or a dude actually brings me two napkins. And by the time I've finished the first half of the sandwich, all three napkins are gone. And I'm just like, I'm just going to be messy until I finish this thing. There's nothing else I can do. I take the first bite out of the second half of the sandwich and something I didn't know was possible happened.

The egg exploded out. It shot egg juice all over the... I was up next against a little wall like a riser. It hit the top of the riser. It dripped down. It covered my headphones. My phone. My reading glasses.

got assaulted and my book all got covered in yoke. It was the yoke of 11 eggs at a half of an egg sandwich. I was stunned. I didn't know what to do. I started trying to clean it up with the three wotted up paper towels or napkins I had and it just made a nightmare. The guy looked at me. He just walked over and he gave me two more paper towels.

I'm trying to clean everything up. I can. Everything. It's one of those things where like the more you touch it, the worse it gets. It's like syrup. It's like there's no cleaning it. Every time I remove egg, I add more eggs somewhere else.

I finally get it all. I give up on the sandwich. I had to completely give up on the sandwich. It just fell apart in my hands and it was a nightmare and it was covered in napkins at this point. Everything I have is incredibly sticky. I never thought about it. I've never covered things I own in egg before. You know what's hard to get off glasses?

Fucking egg. Just like hot egg juice. Oh my God. Egg yolk is viscous. and it does not give up. And so I'm just like, everything I have is yellow and caked and sticky, and I just am horrified.

And so at some point I've done what I can. My hands are a mangled mess. I get up and I go to the bathroom and I just go straight to the sink and I just start washing my hands. And then I look up into the mirror and I look like when a three-year-old eats spaghetti for the first time.

My face is just, my entire beard is yellow. It's my entire beard is yellow. My half my face is yellow. It's the most embarrassing thing. I don't understand how half of a sandwich caused this much damage to me and everything I own. I have to scrub half my body in the bathroom. You were the egg man.

I was the egg man. I paid. I got the fuck out of there. I went immediately home. I had to soak my glasses in water in a bowl to get them clean. It was the grossest thing I've ever done. And I gotta be honest with you, it's bummed me out about eggs. I love the idea that the guy saw your beard and face covered an egg and gave you two more napkins and watched you not use them on your beard.

No, because I had his shit to clean up. I had the whole table to clean up. I'd made such a mess. Oh my God. Oh. Egg is really rough to wipe off glass, in it? It's like, it kind of smears and then goes somewhere. You end up wiping like a just a solid smear across stuff.

Yeah, it's brutal. You got to soak it in soapy water in a bowl in your sink to get it off your glasses. Was it a good sandwich? Yeah, how was it? Do you even know how it tastes based on it? It was okay. It wasn't worth the mess. And even before I got to the explosion after I just had the messy first half, I thought,

over medium sandwich isn't the way to go. I'm going to go back to scrambled or fried if I get the opportunity. like I won't order it like this again because this isn't worth the hassle. And then it very quickly became a way not worse the hassle when I bit into that second half. Can I make a suggestion? I hope you will.

Can we all go there and order that sandwich and face each other in like a four-way standoff? I love this idea. That's how you're going to get me back into eggs. Hold on. Let me write this down. Four-way egg sandwich. This is what I think you guys should do.

I think you should start with the eggs. And then you should actually try to properly uny in the car, which I don't know if you ever did. We did. We did. You did the redo of it with the hot dogs? You didn't watch the video? I just don't remember the video. You should watch it. You'll love it. I have seen it. I've watched it. I just didn't remember. For me, the highlight of that video is that Jeff misremembered. Well, we all kind of misremembered. I don't want to put it squarely on you. But that was the highlight. Not so much the correct attempt. well then you don't even need to do that

so you can just focus on the X. I was just trying to make sure we got all the food insane events that you've experienced knocked out in one but it's all about the X. I've been listening to all of our episodes unfortunately and writing down everything so we don't drop it

we throw in the bit barrel. We have peanut butter and X we have to do still we have a yeah we got a few food things. Here's the thing. This is the thing I wanted to talk about why we got recording so fast because I'm excited for you to be listening to these episodes for this year because it does help. Nick is right.

It does help. You're going to go through and you're going to be like, oh, don't forget about this thing. Oh, we're going to do that. And it's more stuff for the bit barrel, but it's also stuff that we can like jump on trying to do that more this year. I'm really excited about it. We are, hang on, we are going to ask you because you're going to be like,

I listen to the episodes. We're going to be like, how was it? And you're never going to be unbiased and go, oh, it's good. Or this part was funny. You're going to be like, I sucked. This sucked. It wasn't good. This part, I wasn't good on this part.

It's going to be that and I can't do that for a year. Can I say something now? Absolutely. I was just going to, I was going to hop in and apologize because I moved something on my desk and I accidentally muted and I didn't hear the first half of what you said. So I only heard the bad part where you don't like me or whatever. That was the core part I would say.

Hey, you know what? When you re-listen to this episode, I guess you can pick up the whole context everything. Oh, there you go. All right, no problem. I'll listen to it next week. I said, I said that it's good that you're re-listening

because we're not going to drop as many balls and I'm really excited for that. But I can't stand a year of you putting yourself down for a show that is doing well and is fun and I like. I have a simple answer for that. Let's all just do better on the show. Okay, see, this is never. I won't have any, I won't have a reason to be bummed out.

Unadishable. If the shows are really good, I got nothing to be. That's not true. A achievable measure for you. Unachievable, Jeff. At no point will you ever go. That was great.

I'm sorry to have high standards for the things that we make. You don't have high standards. You are looking for a point to cut yourself down at every turn. Every turn. On my generation, it's what we do. It's how I've succeeded in life. But I'm saying I can't do that for a year. Oh, you'll be fine.

You're going to be fine. Oh, my God. 2026 is going to be a great year. I thought you guys made zany posts on subredits. Who's been zany? Gen X or whatever. I don't remember what it was. Jeff went through a phase

where he was so mad at his generation because of the sub- Oh, they're just fucking lame. It's just a fucking whole generation of people posting pictures of themselves in high school when they still had hair and wore fucking goth makeup and going, I was cool, right?

I was cool. Didn't we used to be cool? Look at me at 20. I'm still cool now. I'm bald, but I still wear a chain wallet. and I'm still cool, right? Fuck off. You're never cool.

I think it's interesting thinking because always the generation before always hates upwards. I wonder what age the generation turns inward. When is the self-hatred of your own generation? I think that's mostly, I think that's going to be a pretty Gen X thing. I don't know that there's probably a lot above that. Oh, you think that's specific to Jeff. Specific to my generation. I think it's really heavy towards that 100%.

A real specific. kind of PTSD that was beaten into us from our our baby boomer and silent generation parents, yeah. Yeah. I got excited because I saw a video recently Gen Z complaining about millennials. And I remember like 10-ish years ago, there was a season of Survivor that was

millennial versus Gen X. And Gen X is like the old generation that they're like, they stink. So I'm now excited to be a millennial and entering the era of the generation before complaining that we suck, I'm very excited to learn the specifics of why we suck. It's awesome. I feel like that generation could say what it wants. I mean, they're completely screwed as a generation.

Yeah, I'm not genuinely, I'm not like, ha, these people are being ridiculous. What are they going to say about us? That's crazy. I'm genuinely excited to hear the feedback.

I cannot wait. Who's, what generation isn't fucked, though? The baby boomers have fucked it for every, generation that came after them. And it gets worse. It definitely stacks. It definitely is worse for gen Alpha than it was

for Z than it was for millennials than it is for X. But it's it's fucking, it's just a ladder down. It is. But I think it's a joy to become old enough within your generation to hear the one before it start complaining about specific things. It's a bit of a right of passage for sure. For you as a group. Yeah.

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for it with you? Yeah, of course. All right, this is because it's for everybody. Hey, Jeff, hope Christmas and New Year's treat you well and that your family stays in good health and grows closer in the new year. For shits and giggles while I'm in West Palm Beach visiting family and whatnot, we went down to the Bush Wildlife Sanctuary and I took the opportunity to donate some of the cash I got for Christmas this year towards the conservation and care of the wildlife cared for here. Specifically adopting in spirit

Freddie the Alligator living here in their facility and I decided to make that donation in honor and in name of the Regulation podcast. To all the regulation homies, Jeff, Eric, Gavin, Nick and Andrew, Feliz Navidad, and Happy New Year, Mark the Frog. And then

he sent us a picture of the alligator. Oh, we got a little baby. So that's the, that's a regulation alligator right there. That is, uh, we did it. We finally made it. So the absolutely lovely Christmas gift from Mark the Frog sponsoring Freddie the alligator in our name. So just wanted to say thanks to Mark and, uh, and let him know that.

I thought that was very touching. And, uh, I'm sure you. Yeah. Do you think that Mark the Frog gravitates towards all animals that produce eggs? Yes. I genuinely do. Yeah. I think there's an egg pole.

Across so many things. There's a frog, cleared egg? Uh. Like, is frog spawn just eggs? Is it? I don't know. Well, yeah, that's where tadpoles come from, right? Yeah.

Like, they lay, like, a bunch of, like, little eggs, and then the eggs hatch, and their tadpoles and tadpoles grow into. But they're liquid eggs, right? Oh, I just thought they were just already tadpoles. And they're like, little gooey eggs. No, no, I think it's like, I think it's like little goo eggs that hang out under, like, lily pads and stuff, right? Oh, yeah.

I mean, frogs, but did you not ever used to, like, Chuck frog spawn at each other as kids? No, man. What the fuck are you saying? I didn't throw babies at my friends. Did you ask about the eggs and then say you guys didn't throw frog eggs at each other? What? Yeah, I just thought they were tiny tadpoles in goo.

I guess that's what egg is. Jesus. What? Is that what you're getting to the bottom of in 2026? What an egg is? I mean, a frog egg, it doesn't seem to be a standard egg. It's an interesting egg, isn't it? Like a big...

goo raft of eggs. Is this the egg episode? It might be. I had a friend who, well, we'd walk past a pond other way here from school and one day he took his sock off and filled it with Frogsbourne and swung it over

his head and then let it go and just showered all of us in Frogsbourne. What did he do? Did he put his sock back on after that? I don't think he did. Did his beard turn green? Do you have to rush home? No, but I mean,

similarly to Jeff's story, Frogs spawn, pretty difficult to get off. I imagine. Very residuey. Well, yeah, it's egg, you know? It's baby. Yeah, it's just like little dead baby frogs smeared all over you.

Yeah, I think most of them die anyway, but yeah. I bet you mark the frog didn't anticipate this leading to him having a rival. Your friend is his nemesis. Yeah. What a terrible thing. It's horrible. Did you get hit by the sock or did he just like flail it around? Uh, he let go of it to the point where it just like, it helicoptered a bunch of eggs out in every direction.

Oh, man. It was pretty effective. Pretty good way of distributing eggs amongst friends. What does that guy do for a living now? I think he works in, uh, like, garden care. That makes sense. Interesting. Yeah, it's a passion from a young age.

He loved the outdoors, you know? Distribute eggs amongst friends. Do you think that's the best way to distribute eggs amongst friends in a quick manner? Can we call this episode Eggs Amongst Friends? Yeah, absolutely. I'm trying to think if there would be a better way, like, clean sock. What about like a cheese sock? Do it in a cheese sock?

How would that improve things? Cheese flavor? So, wait. The cheese sock is in cheese related, right? It's for making cheese. So what is a cheese sock for you? I guess it's a thing. that you filter stuff

for making cheese. Are you saying cheese cloth? Yeah, he said she's sock though. Right, no, I'm right. No, I understand what the fuck he said. I'm trying to figure out what he means. Yeah, I guess I mean cheese cloth. It's not cheese sock.

But you can make a sock out of cloth, typically. But I don't think the cloth is what adds the flavor of cheese. No, that was when I started talking through it more. I think the point of the cheese cloth is for making the cheese. I don't think there's actually any cheese in the cloth. But, like, it could give flavor. Like, you filter it through, like, a flavor thing. Do you think some things are filtered through a cheese sock,

and then it gives, it abused them with cheese flavoring? Oh, stinky cheese! It could add, like, a level of flavor to the filtering. We should, we could try this. I don't think I trust. I wouldn't eat cheese that we make, man. Uh-uh, no. No, no, it's a good call.

You wouldn't eat cheese that we could make some great cheese. Cheese is easy. So is a cheese, like a sock? Well, cloth, cheese cloth. What do you keep saying? Stop talking about a cheese sock. Well, if you fold a cloth into a sock shape, it becomes a sock, right? Like, that's all you.

Hey, Andrew, grab a shirt. Real quick, I would say take the one. I could turn a shirt to a sock. No problem. Yeah? I think because Andrew's not a sock guy, he's got misinformation about socks. I put socks on to be festive. And that was a disaster.

It made me further off socks. What? I almost cut socks off of myself. They were too small. I got Grinch socks from McDonald's as part of a Canadian meal. and I went to a Christmas like get together and so I had to put socks on

because so get together and I wanted to be festive so I put them on and they were very hard to put on and then I was told I would probably regret it based on how how small they were and I did

who said you would regret it my partner my partner was like they barely fit on me you're going to have problems and I was like I think's fine and they'll be fine. So you stuffed yourself in him and then went out? Stuffed myself in them and let me tell you, I was right.

I got a lot of comments about the socks. People like the socks. The socks played. But they were difficult to get out. Were they like cutting into your skin? They were so tight? No, I didn't notice in that way. But like when it came time,

so I like to take socks off on my feet. I'm a foot sock taker offer. and it was difficult to get the first one off because of both of the sockage. Yeah. And they were so tight. But I eventually got it hooked to my heel and once I got there, it was fine.

It's surprisingly the second one was harder to take off than the first. It was a lot of me being stuck, honestly. But if you knew the first one was difficult to take off, on the second one, why didn't you just bend over and take it off? I did, I did, I did I had to, I had to get the hands involved That's how bad it was

Typically just slide them off But I had to get both hands on both feet In the mix Plus the foot itself Both hands on both feet Before this sock incident When do you think the last time you'd worn socks was Oh

Probably like eight months Oh wow So you probably you would say that it's it's been almost a year to that point since you'd worn socks yeah because I don't

unless I'm going like to an event or I'll have to walk around shoeless then I don't why would I ever wear them but do you do you foot into a shoe without a sock yeah absolutely

if it's just my shoe yeah we've discussed this before I do remember that we have yeah It was bad. It was a bad. It was because we, this actually leads to another question I have in my notes pretty naturally. We, uh, I'm having a car. I got to fix car stuff. Car issues. So I had to Uber to this thing. And then I had to Uber back. And, uh, I, you know the scene from snatch where the guy tries to get out of the car and it's like, the small vehicle. And it's like him trying to get out and he can't. you remember that so off

I experienced that where the only living in a smaller community there are a lot of times where there's just no Uber drivers around but thankfully there was one

when it was time to leave but it was a tiny car and it should have been an immediate sign of this is going to be a bad scenario where they parked in front of the driveway in which we were going to get picked up

and we got maybe like three feet away from it and then they drove to the opposite side of the street because they didn't they couldn't read the house numbers and they didn't see us. So it was an incredibly annoying beginning of getting to the car and then the car leaving and going to the other side of the street and then having to walk across the street to get into the car. This was an incredibly small vehicle. I get in. It's fine. Getting out absolute disaster. Terrible. I'm behind the driver because he drove to the other side of the street and I'm trying to get out of

this small load-to-the-ground car and threw my back out in the process of it. Oh, no. You stuffed into your little socks at this point? I'm stuffed into my little socks in this little car.

You're stuck in socks, stuck in a car. I'm stuck in socks, stuck in a car. Get out of the car. So when you go to take your socks off, you've already thrown your back out at that point. Yeah, but I didn't know it. I didn't know it until the next day. Oh.

So what sort of position were you in trying to get out? I had a feeling it was going to be a problem, so I gave my phone up so I could get both hands involved. And it was so much more awkward because I'm behind the driver, where if I was on the other side, I think it would have been fine. But I'm behind the driver. I get the left half of my body out. And then I'm stuck in like a sideways position. Like I'm trying to shimmy between a wall type thing. I consider just falling out of the car

as just like an easiest way to get out I ended up having to grip the underside of the tire area and then I put my well you know where there's like there's a tire and then there's the frame of the car yeah yeah the wheel well I had to grip the wheel well

and then grip like the top right corner of the car. And then it was fine. Could you not grip like the handle above your head or the seat or the door frame? Okay. For me, like my head was touching the roof the entire time. Yeah. And I was past being in the car.

I was halfway out the car. It was just the bad angle. And as I said, I would have just used like, I would have just pushed off with the seat in front of me. But there's a guy sitting in that. seat because he drove to the other side of the road. So it was a night. So I have so many.

So you are so out of the car that you didn't have any car internals to grab. I had no car internals. Outside of the seat, but I'm not going to touch that because he's sitting in it. Or the door, but I imagine the door feels precarious because it moves. The door feels precarious because it moves and I'm like level with the door. Yeah. Now the wheel well, is it covered in mud and gag and wetness? So, it was so nasty.

Is it snowy at this point? No snow. Rain, but there was rain. It was a rainy day. Okay, and my next question. Most of this problem seems to be because you're sat behind the driver. Why don't you walk around the other side?

It's just where I ended up in the car. I didn't necessarily consider this scenario until I was in the vehicle. But the thing I was thinking about most in the vehicle is I've never really Ubered before in my hometown whenever I'm on vacation somewhere, like I'll use Uber, but it's not something I typically have to do where I live. And it made me feel like a tourist in a way for a place that I've lived

in my entire life. It gave me like a unique, I felt like I was on vacation, but I knew all the places. But I was so I was curious to you, Gavin, what? Is there something that like makes you feel, I don't know, grounded or like what? What are the, what? What are, like the staples of, I guess I don't know how you don't feel like a tourist all the time in Austin as somebody who Uber's a lot of places. I feel like I feel like a tourist everywhere. Yeah, that's what I was kind of wondering. Because I enjoyed it, but I was like, I feel...

Yeah, just look out the window and I think, none of this is mine. Yeah. Eric, you Uber from time to time. Do you ever feel like a tourist in your own town? That's a great question, Jeff. No, I can't say that I have because I've been driving in a car and I've been a passenger in a car. So no.

It's essentially the same thing. I feel like it's a different thing where you don't have any ownership of the vehicle and there's a person in it that you just don't know that's in control of everything. I guess so.

I just don't think about the ownership of the car when I'm in an Uber, I guess. That doesn't really enter into my thoughts at all. I Uber all the time, especially in Austin these days because if it's going to be at all

annoying to park, I'll just Uber. So I don't have to worry about it. That's fair. I think for me it's baked into the social dynamics of this person being part of this journey that you don't know. So I'm thinking about... What does that mean? Well, because if I'm in a car, let's say I own the vehicle and I know everybody in the car, I don't think about necessarily the journey in that way.

where now that I'm in this vehicle with this Uber driver that I don't know it's their car, I feel some level of responsibility to respect the vehicle as well as I'm constantly wondering to what extent do I need to be social with this driver.

No, it's all. I was gonna say, I think Gavin can answer that for you. You even get to list your conversation preferences in the app. You get to say no conversation. Leave me the fuck alone. Really? I don't think I have that. I don't think that's in Canada, that app.

feature. Uber. No, we have Uber. But we don't. I'm sure you do. It's like preference, like temperature preference, music, conversation, you just hit like no and no,

cool. Really? Yeah. Let me click. Let me open Uber really quickly and just see if I have that. I don't think I have that. You're going to have to select a ride before you do it. Don't do that. He's going to call a car. That's not an option until you select the car. Yeah, and you can set whether or not they switch side to the road

right as you're walking up as well, if you want that. I must have hit the wrong button for that one. But I had to get rid of the Grinch socks. They're gone. I guess I just don't know the feeling of... I mean, aside from Jeff giving me a lift,

I've never been in a car that I owned. But when... I was going to ask you about... Because I assume Does Meg have a view? I feel like you talk about Meg driving your rent. And that's Meg's car.

Yeah, but he doesn't own Meg's cars like he owns mine. That's true. Yeah, Meg owns his house. Fucking funny. I was hoping that you were the one that bought the car. Because I own

the car that we use. But I don't drive, really. So, by choice. By choice. By choice. Like you. Have you driven it, though? This car, no.

I haven't. But you have a license to... Yes. So you could drive it, like, right now, if you wanted. Theoretically, yes. Do you ever just think, oh, you know, it's... But only theoretically. Why only in theory?

Why would it not be in practice? Because I don't drive, but... But you could. There's no, like, legal... Right, so I don't know why it's a theory. I'm trained and licensed to drive a vehicle that I own. And in theory, I could. I could.

So you'll never there like 1 p.m. on an afternoon. And you think, I've got nothing going on. Let me just drive the car around, do a little lap, come back. No. Well, first of all, the car isn't functioning right now. So I can't, there's no laps to be had. But even if it was, no. if there was an emergency and I needed to be somewhere

immediately I would Uber or whatever there are other apps that I can use 911 I wouldn't call them for this oh in an emergency you wouldn't well I meant I meant like a social emergency not not an like a like a last second party breaks out

and you just find out about it and you got to cross down yeah or like I need to be somewhere that is important in my life but not like actually important on a what was your last social emergency my last social emergency i don't know if i've ever had a social emergency but you brought up this scenario yeah i'm just i'm trying to think of scenarios like reasons i would have to immediately leave somewhere in a way that i wasn't prepared for and i can't really think of any that have occurred there's never been a time where i've had to use a ride app to get somewhere suddenly

because I didn't anticipate going Well you had that You had that time Where you really needed to shit Like what if you were out somewhere That had very bad facilities I don't wrote My body locks down

I don't do it on the road Yeah but would you Uber home for a shit Oh yeah Absolutely I would 100% I would say that's a social emergency Yeah Not a 911 emergency

But I'm already out at that point Yeah I do think that one time If that happens you should call 911 about it just to make sure. I think that's an 8-1-1 scenario. Is, like, not quite an emergency?

I have a question about whether it's an emergency or not an emergency. Yeah. There is a time I looked out my window. It was, like, 4 a.m. I was going to bed, couldn't sleep, watched a movie. I looked out my window, and somebody was starting a fire. Is that 8-1-1-9-1? What is 8-1-1-1-1?

What is 811? What is 811? What is... What is... It's like a 3-1-1. Is that 3-1-1-1? I don't know what a 3-1... What's a 3-1-1?

This is... We can't describe it in a term he doesn't know. There's no way he knows what a 3-1-1 is. You guys are insane. Is it a 1-2-4? It's the national call before you dig phone number in America. Were they digging in the fire? What?

I looked up what is 8-1-1 in America? It is the national call before you dig phone number. I thought 811 was the non-emergency line. We don't have 8-1-1 here, Andrew. Well, we do. It's a national call before you dig number. Well, I didn't assume that you would also have 8-1-1, but I figured,

contextually, you guys would understand that it was a non-emergency line. Did we dial 8-1-1 before the beanhole? Yes. Should have. I just am often struggling between what's an 8-1-1 and what's a 9-1-1. And I looked out my window, and I saw somebody start,

a fire. What kind of fire? Like the flame kind, like I don't know, the grass. So was it a grass fire? Do they start like in a field or do they start it in a barrel for warmth? Like what are we, was it arson? It was in a field. I would argue

maybe arson. Well, I would definitely call 9-1-1 about that. So Andrew, I'm with you because I had a similar situation a while ago where I saw somebody lighting a fire in front of a grocery store and I'm like, oh, is this an emergency or non-emergency? So I called emergency and they told me it's non-emergency.

Okay. So 8-1 wouldn't have been the answer. Right. But then I called non-emergency and they said, no, this is an emergency. And I went, either way, I need to talk to somebody who can do something about this. And I'm not calling 911 again. And they went, okay. And they connect me to the fire department.

And I just went, I guess I should have just called the fire. Well, what's the fire department's number? 5-1-1? Like, how do I connect to the fire department? 911. Okay, but clearly not in this situation. Maybe you should have just conference them both together and awesome. Yeah, no kid.

Hey, yeah, let me get 911 here. You guys get you guys figure it out and I'll take off. Don't you feel like if you call 911, you're going to get in trouble? Yes, that's how I felt calling 911 when that was happening. I've done it once in my life when I was in high school for a medical thing. And ever since that, like, I just, I'm terrified to call 911. I just feel like even, I feel like whatever my emergency is, it wouldn't rise to the occasion. And then they would yell at me and they'd be like, you're wasting valuable time.

It's so we could be saving other people's lives by now, but you called about this dumb thing. And then I would get yelled at that. That has never got through my head, darling no one. Really? Oh my God. Oh. Oh, extreme fear. Yeah.

There's still parts of me that I'm, I'm an adult man. And I, there are times where I go, ooh, am I going to be in trouble? And I don't know, I don't know who I would be. in trouble with, but there are just occasional moments of, ooh, I'm going to be in trouble. I had to change my voicemail password because one time when trying to access my voicemail, I accidentally called 911. And then I panicked and I hung up immediately. But I guess the call still went through.

And then they called me back and I did not answer because I was like, I, this is Gary. I don't want to deal with this. You're crazy. And then they left a voicemail. and they said, unless you call us back, we will send a patrol car to your area. So then I had to call them back and they're like, where are you?

And I gave my location and they said, that's not matching what it says here. And I was like, I don't know what to tell you. I'm here. I was trying to access my voicemail. So I completely changed my password. So I wouldn't accidentally do it.

But as someone who wasn't 32 in 1995, why were you manually dialing into your voicemail? No, no, no, no. I had called my voicemail, and it said, input your passcode to access it. And I put in the numbers, and it went into 911 immediately from there.

It just took me to 911. I still... Come on, come on, Gavin, you can get to the bottom of this. I don't understand how it happened either, but it did happen. But is that how you listen to voicemail? I call my voicemail, and then I punch in a code. How do you listen to the voicemail?

And think about it, Gav, if the code is not... What do you never forget? 9-11, baby? Yeah, but I've never had to dial... I thought you only dial in a code if you're using someone else's phone. You're using your own phone? Yeah, but this phone could be an Umi-Digie.

Yeah, that's true. Like, my own phone number... Do you guys not have to put in a code for your voicemail all the time? No, it's like... No. Now they just come in as like files on your phone. But before...

Before that, you would just dial, like when I lived in England, I would just dial like, I would hold down one and it would dial my inbox. I wouldn't have to, it's my phone number. Like it knows what voicemail inbox to give me. Here, this is, what's about to happen? I, we might hear the process. The last time you were in your mailbox, you left with unplayed messages. You have two, new voicemail. Oh, if I just called voicemail.

Oh. What did you do different? Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Because it sounded like it just told you how many messages you have. Yeah, what's that, what's that, what's that, what's that, what's that? Let me try this. Time you were in your mailbox. Oh.

Do I not have to do it now? I don't think now is a part of this, man. I don't think now is a part of this. It worked itself out. I don't know when I stopped doing that. Yeah, but it's your phone. I understand, but I've had to do it on my phone so many times. When was the last time you checked your messages?

The only time I check my messages is if somebody leaves a message from a number I don't recognize. But you don't get a notification saying who left a message? So if I get a call, it'll then notify me that like this person left the message or not. If I know the person, I don't listen to the message, I just call them back. back next time I talk to them. Wait. I don't listen to the messages if I know them.

So you've never listened to a message I've left you. If you left me a voicemail, no, I wouldn't listen to it. I'd just call you. What a load of shit? You wouldn't listen to it? No. You would be curious that someone who never leaves voicemails left you a voicemail?

In the situation of Jeff calling, maybe I would. I guess if it's someone who, but I'm just going to call you. So why would I, why would I listen? That might be funny. I guess I don't look for voicemails in that way. I'm pretty funny. I would probably leave a funny voicemail. Here's my belief system.

If it's an emergency, I'll also get a text immediately following the voicemail, explaining that I need to reach them immediately. But if I just get a voicemail, then it's like, I'm going to talk to this person when I call them in the near future. I don't think you do anything right. I'll take you like five minutes

to be able to talk on this podcast. So, I'm starting better than you. I join this call and said everything's broken. It's not... Oh! He's got you there.

Look, I'm... I'm not out here saying I do things right. But I just... I... Because you said it figured itself out as those... They've made a change. But there's no way anything changed on their end. Who is...

Who is they? Government. Voicemail people. Voicemail people. All right. This isn't like some Google number you had to call in or something, calling to? No, it was my personal phone number before. You always have weird phone numbers that you have,

that you've acquired. I just assumed it was something like that. How did you get to the point where you typed in a code? Like, what did you dial to get to that point? I would just call, I would make a contact called me, and I would phone me.

This is crazy. This is absolutely nuts. That for me, look, I get the calling your own phone number. There's something about saving yourself as a contact that is like beyond the pale for me, man. I don't know. You guys don't have you as a.

No! You would cool you. Wouldn't that leave you a voicemail? I'm gonna. But you know you so you'd never listen to it. Well, he'd wait for him to call him back. I'll just call me back Leah. It couldn't have been that a good.

If I really need to talk to me, I'll text me. Well, I only call me to hear when people I don't know call me. Why don't you cool, what did you cool voicemail? Oh, he just showed us. We're not going to share this photo, obviously, but he just sent us a picture of the contact. Oh my God. It gave me the feeling like I was going to pass out. Like, everything sort of like got wavy and dark.

I know. That is the funniest image I've ever seen, but please delete it right now. Yeah. I love as well that you didn't put it as Andrew or anything where it would have been a much higher up in your list. You put it literally as me. I might meet another Andrew. I'm not going to need another me. 18th letter.

Oh, God damn, dude. So the first, so for one reason, it's the voicemail. The second reason is up until probably six months ago, I just didn't memorize my phone number. So any time I would need my phone number, I would search me and then I'd just read them the number. What long have you had your phone number? So you can't remember 10 things?

I just Andrew Andrew I get really so I I've had phone number confusion

in a way that was complicated this show is crazy I had a phone number so when I was as a teenager my dad

paid for my phone and we're on the same plan and then he had an issue with his phone number so then he took my phone number and then I got a new number

and then so I became paranoid of giving people his number which used to be mine so then I just stopped learning phone numbers and double checked every time and so I just decided I don't need to remember this I will just always look at my contact info my phone but then I made the effort of

I should just learn this like six months ago so now you know it so now I know it yeah I know all right well it's July I better remember my phone number man God that was like

learning your address and your phone number is like the fourth thing I taught Millie as a kid oh yeah address on top of it absolutely like if you ever get lost here's your phone number

here's your address tell a police officer I didn't think I've ever dialed my phone number what would happen you probably go to voicemail all right let me see I'm shocked you guys don't have you

your phones. Enter your password. No way. What? Did you hear that? Nope. Didn't hear that. It said please enter your password.

Oh shit. See? Everyone try it. Oh, hold on. All right, hold on. Why literally you just said please into your password? Hang on. Let me make a new contact.

Okay, me. Maybe it saved my password because I do it like, I've done it recently. Please enter your password. Yep. Yep, told me to enter my password. I mean, that makes sense.

That's how I checked my voicemail in 2006. Yeah. You never just held down the number one? You can do that? What happens if you hold down one? I don't know, do I? Uh, how do I? E-pad.

One. Whoa, that's crazy. Thanks, Evan. What do you mean? What do you mean? What do you mean? You've locked yourself out. It told me that somebody else had called in and they're on right now.

Yeah. You can't listen because you're listening. No! I haven't needed to dial for voicemail in... Oh. 10 plus years? Over a decade? Yeah, easily. Do you guys just hold one?

No, it's just like a part of the phone now. It just comes in like a text and then it comes in like a voice note. Other Android users, let me know. Am I doing this wrong or is an Android compared to that? Android compared to iPhone thing. Because I get the drop down. But it doesn't like break down. Like if I get a voicemail, it says you have a new voicemail.

But I feel like that doesn't always work when I click that. What happens when you click that? Does it dial your voicemail? Does it play the clip? I feel like I've clicked that before and it just says like this number is not in service. Can I leave you a voicemail right now? Oh yeah. Yeah, go ahead.

He's not going to listen to it. Yeah, he won't. He knows you. I might listen to this contextually. I think there are going to be people there like, yeah, I also don't listen. I just call them. You know, be right. Declined.

That takes you to voicemail, right? Yeah, I should. I never declined calls because I don't want people to feel like I'm not answering by choice. Yeah, I get it. Yeah. Yeah, fine. All right, sounds like he's just completing that voicemail. All right, did it.

Thanks. Okay. So now, I have a voicemail just now, and I click the drop down. Yep. Yeah. It works. Okay. I guess I don't need to dial anything.

It's 2026. Yeah. Recently, though. Recently. We just got there. Recently. Like two weeks in. Oh my God

One day over I have missed recording this podcast Jesus Christ That wasn't even on my list of things to figure out in 2026 This is We did it You're head of the game

Oh incredible Hey before we wrap up Because I know we're getting long here We did a stream on Friday That Nick Eric and I were at And on it was a good stream It was this game called

A game about digging a hole That we played but on that stream, I feel like, I think it was where it happened. We came up with an idea for a new product that I, I don't think Andrew and Gavin heard about and I wanted to mention to you guys. I thought it was kind of a cool idea and see what you guys think about it. What's the product? There was discussion of a new coin, you know, like reprinting the coin or not.

And I feel like that's something that has to be left up to the coin monger, who is Gavin. And I don't know if you just want to order more coins or if you want to flip for coins or whatever, but I figure that's something you and Emily can handle on a break show or something. But somewhere along the lines, the idea of a different coin got floated that I thought was pretty funny, where on one side it's a pigeon, and on the other side it's a falcon. Pigeon falcon coin. Yeah. Sort of there are two birds inside of you.

One is a pigeon. One is a falcon. And then they're kind of open to interpretation. So you could, like, you get to determine what the pigeon side is and what the falcon side means. Can we have different sized coin? I assume so. That's up to the coins are. I mean, that's not really up to us.

You can request it, but ultimately the coins are is in charge. I'll have a meeting with Emily. About it. Yeah, I just wanted to put a bee in your bonnet, you know, that there was an idea for maybe a pigeon falcon coin that could be cool. But either way, we got to figure out what to do with the Eons and Assholes coin because sold out. Yeah, if we took, we hadn't recorded anything since they sold out immediately,

have we? No. I don't think so. No, I don't think so. 5,000. In 15 minutes, they sold out. Held on to that Gerpler for a full 24 hours, though, which was awesome, I think. That's great.

Speaking of which, and Eric, we can cut this if you don't want it in the episode. I ordered the new round of Gerplers yesterday. And we were very, I read the email, very deliberate about it is the Gerpler that changes to Gerpo. It is the green to purple. The green to purple. We were very, very clear. And so it is officially on order.

Springtime. Springtime was when you guys could expect another 11,000 is what we had to order again, guys. I don't, it's, that's, oh boy. Who knows, maybe we'll have a, we'll have a Gerpler Fool's celebration or something. Rupertools. You never celebrated April Fool's at the other company, so. There you go. Did we ever hear from anyone if they got the Gurpul Gurpler?

No, at the time of this recording, people are receiving their cups. So we will hear probably shortly, I would think in like the next week or so, when people come around and they go, oh my God, I got it. So I'm sure that'll happen. I can't wait. So for those who didn't see the little video, we accidentally ordered 11,000 of the wrong Gerpler, but we did have the sample of the correct Gerpler,

which we did put in one person's order. That's correct. And we got confirmation that that was happening. Yes. Also, if you ended up getting that one, you should have gotten it, also the regular Gerpler, like the murderer. So like you would get, it's not like, oh, you got that instead. You would give both. There you have it. That is going to be a thing that you can flex with for months until Gerpler fools. It's Gerpler fools. Jeff has just posted a video.

I was going to talk that out there and talk about it in a minute. But when I was riding around the trail the other day. I drove by an Aqua bulldozer. So I had to take a video of it. Watch this thing. I don't know what this contraption is, but I want it. It's like got like a bulldozer claw thing on the front and then like a grabber arm on the back.

Is it for like picking up junk from the river? I don't know, but it's a it's fucking, it's a, it's awesome. It's like boat construction. That is really cool. How do we get a license for that? I don't know, but I want, I want us to have one. I think Gavin should be the only

one that has that type of license. I agree. Everyone else can drive, but he's the only one that can operate that. Did we ever do the sports vehicles draft, like the Zambonies and stuff? Oh, I don't think so. I don't know. I don't think so. No, I don't think we did. I can put it on the list, yeah, for sure.

Yeah, please. Maybe we just need like an obscure vehicles drive to help us pick the regulation vehicle. But I think this thing is a contender. I would love it if we had one of these. I was blown away. That was me, so that was me riding my bike, seeing it going, what the fuck? Driving about a half a mile down the road and going,

no, no, no, no, no, no. I definitely saw that and I got to share this with the guys. Turn it around, riding back, and then trying to find him and take the picture while he was looking at me. So I was, I didn't record for too long, but crazy contraption. That's incredible. Who knew that that

existed? We should wrap this one up because we still have a lot to record today. If you guys are looking for us to wrap up a bunch of loose ends on drafts and for new things in 2026. Keep an eye out because we're about to do new nicknames. We're about to do more Nostradamus stuff and the summer movie league will get a proper wrap up as well.

So keep your eyes and ears open for those things across everywhere you get your regulation content. Hell yeah. Can we also tease the live action thing we just shot? Absolutely. Absolutely, Gavin. You want to talk about it? Or do you want to save it for an episode?

Oh, I think we can tease it. Okay. It's going to be live action video coming out. But what's the video called, Gavin? Gavin grows up. It comes out this Sunday. It will be out this Sunday. When this episode comes out,

it will be out this Sunday, the 18th on Patreon. Boy, you don't, it's going to be unforgettable forever for me and Gavin probably. I can't wait to see it. I want to go my new DMX. Whoa. Oh, man.

I cannot wait to see this. Gavin did a bunch of grown-up milestones all in one day. I took a shower after I go home. Good move, my man. All right. Well, we got to wrap this one up so we can keep it going.

All right. All right. Well, there you go. This is the first episode recorded in 2026, but obviously not the first episode of 26. Very excited about what the year has in store for us. Definitely a four-way egg sandwich in the near to immediate future. Gavin promised us a British chocolate gauntlet. I'm not letting

that go. I'm assuming he brought all that chocolate back with him like he said it would. Peanut butter and Jaffa cakes. There's a whole billion things we've got going that you're going that you're going to want to tune in for. And we can't wait to share them with you. Thank you so much. We'll see you next week. Bye bye. Bye. Bye. Thank you.