Relatable with Allie Beth Stuckey - Ep 1059 | After Tragedy, I Can’t Feel God. What Do I Do? | Q&A

Starting point is 00:00:00 How do I deal with a friend who is deconstructing their faith? How do I get my politically apathetic friends to be engaged in politics? What is on my bucket list? What kind of dog breed when my husband and I be? We've got so many good questions on today's episode of Relatable. It's brought to you by our friends at Good Ranchers. Go to Good Ranchers.com. Use Code Allie. Check out that's good ranchers.com code Allie. Hey guys, welcome to Relatable. Today I am answering some of of your wonderful question. So we're just going to get right into it. Do you ever see yourself becoming a politician? Someone asked. I've been asked this several times. And the answer is no.

Starting point is 00:00:56 I don't, I don't see myself becoming a politician wanting to run for office. I just don't think so. I really like what I do and I actually think that I have more of an ability to make change and to play a role in changing culture and changing minds and to make things happen and actually have more influence in what I do. And it's a lot more fun and it's a lot more flexible and I get to wear whatever I want and live wherever I want. So it would have to be like an absolute clear calling. And I just don't, I just don't see that happening. I guess you never know, but I don't see it happening. Now, press secretary, that's not something that I would probably say no to. It depends on who the president was and all of that and what stage of life that I'm in

Starting point is 00:01:56 and all that good stuff. But that is probably as close as I would get to the political realm. Do I actually think that Kamala is attracting the majority of voters? I think she can't. Now, I saw someone make the point recently that she could not have lasted in like an 18-month campaign, the way that Biden tried to, the way that Trump has had to, that there's just no way that she could have lasted that long because there's so much material against her. And so this was just such an effective strategy for team Kamala to be able to come in.

Starting point is 00:02:34 and save the day to take the wind out of the sales after the Trump attempted assassination and to just garner as much energy as possible and hope and pray that that pushes her through to election day. Remember, when she ran for president back in 2020, I mean, she barely got, what, 1% of the vote? It was, I mean, it was embarrassing. It was terrible. She was not an attractive candidate. They have changed that completely over the past few years, and especially over the past few weeks. Can she win? She can absolutely win. And it helps us not at all to be in denial about that. For some reason, there are people on the Trump side who get mad when I say that. Why would you get mad? I'm trying to take things seriously because I really want to win this election against

Starting point is 00:03:19 Kamala Harris. And we will not win if we don't take it seriously. There's got to be a feelings shift here. There's got to be a vibe shift here. She's got so much material again. She's got so much material again. her and we have to repeat those things over and over again. She is anti-fraking. She is pro-socialist health care. She's the most rabidly pro-abortion politician that we've ever seen. Like there's so much out there policy-wise, personality-wise. Go, go, go, go, go. Time is of the essence. Let's see. Dream guest on the podcast. It's got to be Thomas Sol. I mean, he's pushing 100, so I don't think that's going to happen. But I would love to have Thomas Sol on the podcast. That that is absolutely my dream. I've had so many awesome people on that at this point, I'm like,

Starting point is 00:04:06 who could I even get? That would be bigger and better than the people that I've had. I mean, it'd be fun to have some celebrities, I guess, that are like kind of like Christians in Hollywood. Now, there are plenty of people I haven't had on that I would love to have on. But like a reach guest, I feel like I've had most of the ones that I want. But we've got to feel. you on our list that we're that we're going for what is my favorite cereal well typically it's like granola i really like granola and i like almond milk and i know that some of you are going to be like almond milk no you just need to drink raw milk look we get raw milk but i don't like milk even raw milk and some of you are like oh no you just you'll like raw milk if you don't like regular milk no i don't like oh

Starting point is 00:04:55 i don't but i like almond milk okay i don't know it's just it's taste and you know i get the you really have to be careful about the kind of almond milk that you get because a lot of it has like fake ingredients in there you got to get the kind that's just filtered water and almonds and so that's what I have and then I also like I'll eat my magic spoon cereal and that's like I like that because that's like low carb and high protein and put some peanut butter in there and it's like a healthier version of for example like what was it uh Reese Reese's puffs were those the cereal like I can't believe we ate that stuff growing up. But Reese's puff cereal, so good. I also used to have like the Rice Krispie cereal, but never by itself, like probably a good cup of sugar. Pour it in there.

Starting point is 00:05:45 It all sinks to the bottom. And then your last bites of cereal are literally just spoonfuls of sugar. That's the kind of cereal that I prefer growing up. But now I can have a healthier version when I have like my cocoa-flavored magic spoon and some almond milk and then some yummy peanut butter in there. So that's what I would say. That's a good combo. Is my husband crunchy? For those of you who don't know what crunchy is, like more on the natural side, I would

Starting point is 00:06:17 say yes. Yes, he is. And he has gotten more so recently. He has crunchier than me who is. what is it? Scrunchy. I'm scrunchy. I'm somewhere in between silky and crunchy. Like I definitely do things that are more on the, that are completely on the natural side.

Starting point is 00:06:35 And then I still do things that are not considered that. But he is much crunchier than I am. He really cares about everything. Like the water that we drink, which I do too, but he cares about it even more. Anti-plastic. We have not used a non-stick pan. in forever. He really cares about like all the material of all of our clothes and our sheets and all of that stuff. We have air purifiers throughout our home. Yeah, he really cares. I would say

Starting point is 00:07:10 even more than I do about all of that, about health and wellness and stuff, which I appreciate because I get to benefit from that. What are my favorite pair of shoes? Right now, my favorite pair shoes are some, I guess would you call them espadrilles because they're not really wedges. They're kind of like the same height all throughout. And they're actually Velcro on the top. They're black and white and I really love them because they are super comfy and they kind of make my outfit look fancier while feeling like I'm wearing tennis shoes. So I would say those are my favorite shoes right now. Thanks for asking. What advice do I have for getting my mom friends interested in politics slash policy. Great question. Great question. I think that you just have

Starting point is 00:07:59 to have conversations with them about it. Like if you're together watching a show and or you're together getting coffee, I think you just have to bring it up, especially if you're like in a Bible study situation because the Bible and politics intersect so much in this election season. I think you just have to start asking them questions or see if they'll read a book that you recommend or see if they'll listen to this podcast, maybe start them out with an episode that it's not explicitly political. Maybe it's an interview that I've done that is especially compelling that can make them think about an issue through like an anecdote storytelling kind of way. Some, you know, a lot of people obviously like my monologues, but some people are better convinced

Starting point is 00:08:46 and their attention is better grabbed through those kind of like interviews and stories. And so maybe that's where I would start. I'm also working on some tools for everyone this election season because I've got my book coming out on October 15th. And it talks all about these issues. And I thought about that woman, that Christian woman who I really want to under, I want her to understand politics a lot more. And so I wrote it not only for her, partly for her, but also just for you.

Starting point is 00:09:15 So you can have the equipment to get her involved, to get her understanding, engaged, carrying about those things without feeling anxious or worked up or like she has to be sucked into the news all the time. Also, I actually think that this is probably a good starter too this book because we do talk about politics and culture in it, but again, it's not explicitly political. Like it's not saying neither of my books is saying you have to go vote Republican. But it does talk about the issues, primarily from a theological and philosophical perspective. And this, I think that they will, first of all, they'll be able to read it really quickly or they can listen to it. I've got it in the audio version. And it's just really easy to read. And I think

Starting point is 00:09:55 it talks about the big culture war issues that we have in a way that is really just understandable from a Christian perspective. That's my book, you're not enough. And that's okay. It's available everywhere. We link it in the description. You can find it there. You all know how much I love Carly Jean Los Angeles right now as I'm recording this ad. I've got my CGLA Gene Jacket on. I've got so many of these things because they are so comfortable and they go with everything. I love Carly Jean, Los Angeles, Denham. The jeans are just, it's just next level. They're so flattering. They're so comfortable. I've had so many CJLA genes over the years and it's really just spoiled me. I can't really wear any other jeans now because they have a lot of give without losing their shape, so flattering,

Starting point is 00:10:45 so many different styles. I love Carly Jean Los Angeles, really all of their clothes. It's great for every season of life, every season of the year. You can mix and match. And this is a Christian family-owned company that you can feel really good about supporting. If you go to Carly Jean, Los Angeles.com and use code Alley's Free Jeans. If this is the first time you are purchasing a pair of jeans from Carly Jean Los Angeles, you get a bogo. You can buy one, get one free. Oh, my goodness. Carly Jean Los Angeles.com code Alley's free jeans. Thoughts on the carnivore diet? You know, I don't have anything wrong with it.

Starting point is 00:11:29 Of course, I'm not a health. I'm not a health expert. Like if I were to choose carnivore or vegan, I would, of course, choose carnivore. Because I really like steak. I really like meat. I think it's really good for you. And you get a lot of vitamins and minerals and nutrients and good fats and protein from meat. And I think it's really good for your brain, really good for your muscles,

Starting point is 00:11:53 really good for your body. Some meat is better than others. Some animals are better than others for meat. And there's a lot that goes into that. And I won't get into every single detail because I was trying to do carnivore for a little bit. But it was hard to do, it's hard to do while I'm nursing. I do think that I need some like sourdough bread sometimes for that purpose. So I haven't done carnivore while I've been nursing. But I think it works for a lot of people. I think it cuts down on inflammation and even helps people immunity-wise for other people that might not work. I think there are probably a lot of different kinds of eating plans that work for different kinds of people.

Starting point is 00:12:36 And some are better than others. Sure, just objectively, but really it seems like for different individuals, different things work. Or maybe it's more accurate to say for different groups of people, different things work. But I think meat is one of God's gifts to us. let's see how to deal with a hostile work environment they gossip about me because I'm conservative while blessed are you when you are persecuted for righteousness's sake let me clarify that I'm not saying that being conservative is the same thing as being Christian but I'm assuming

Starting point is 00:13:15 I'm guessing that it is probably actually your faith and you standing for Christian principles that they are ridiculing and they are probably considering those just conservative or traditional or bigoted when really you're just being a Christian believing in the definition that God created of marriage, of gender, of the definition of life inside the womb. We call those things political or conservative in the political sense, but really you're just being a Christian and sticking to the Bible. Maybe I'm wrong, but I'm assuming that's that is what they are ridiculing you for. And if so, like, blessed are you when you are persecuted for righteousness's sake. And so you can continue to be a light.

Starting point is 00:13:54 You can continue to be loving. If it's something that really is so hostile that it's prohibiting you from doing your job, then you need to go to HR and say that you are being discriminated against because of your religious beliefs. And because of that, it's created a hostile work environment. Those buzzwords are probably going to scare them and they're probably going to do something about it. I would say that that could be an approach to take while also just being the light of Christ, continuing to be the hardest working, the most honest, and the most enthusiastic employee there, and never returning their gossip and their slander in kind. It may not seem like it is

Starting point is 00:14:39 like it is worth it to take the high road, but number one, God sees you and cares and is well pleased with that. And then number two, you never know. what seeds your good behavior, your kindness, your obedience is planted in the hearts of those people who hate you now and how God will water that and give that growth. It can be such a testimony. My pastor's wife is now the new pastor of the church after her husband died. What should I do? Switch churches. If you were in ice cream flavor, what would you be in why? Birthday cake? I don't know. Because I like it. No other reasons. reason. I don't know if it has anything to do with my personality. I don't know. Lots of fun surprises

Starting point is 00:15:26 in there. I just like birthday cake ice cream. I think it tastes good. Thoughts on separate youth group Sunday school classes for kids during church. Yeah, it's a good question. You know, different churches do things different ways. I was raised in the Baptist Church. Still go to a Baptist Church now. And so we do the like, you know, kids Sunday school and the adult Sunday school too. And then main service. And sometimes kids come into the main service. But most of the time they stay in kids church. church. And I would say typically Presbyterian churches do it a little bit differently. They don't have Sunday school class for all ages for both hours every Sunday. Like sometimes kids will go to study school class for one hour. They'll go to the main service with their parents

Starting point is 00:16:09 or some churches will do it to where they have like a nursery and kids church until age six. And then after that, the kids are expected to go into service with their parents. I remember growing up only going to Sunday school for one hour. And I, you know, now that I think about it, my church probably does that too. After a certain age, I think it's only one hour and then you go into the main service with your kids. My kids are all young right now. So I think it's great when people bring their kids into church, though. I really do. Even in those hard ages, two, three, four, those are tough ages to get your kid to sit there. But I think it's good for them to learn. But I also think it's great for kids to be in an environment where they are learning

Starting point is 00:16:55 in a fun way and an engaging way and a way that makes sense to them, the principles and the stories of the Bible. So I really think that there can be benefits to both. And I think it's really just a choice of a parent. And of course, either way, the parent cannot just delegate their responsibility to be the primary faith trainer of their child to Sunday school. You can't do that. It still has to be you, number one. But Sunday school, I think, can be a good help with that. Would you like to have dinner?

Starting point is 00:17:26 Who would you like to have dinner with? On the left. This person says aside from AOC, because I always say AOC, because I really think I could like get her to just stop. Let's see. On the left, it would probably be like, Probably Kamala Harris at this point. Like I really just want to like psychoanalyze these people, dig deep into these people, know what makes them tick.

Starting point is 00:17:50 For Kamala Harris, it's power. I know that. We've seen that since Willie Brown. So I don't think of that deep there. But like I'd really just kind of like want to push on that. Probably anyone on the left too, like calls themselves a Christian and still pushes progressive policies. I would like to talk to them. So yeah, probably Kamala at this point.

Starting point is 00:18:12 How to navigate friendships with people in different life stages. I'm a mom and my friends are not. You know, that's really hard. I was married first of my friends. I was, I believe, mom first of my friends. And there was definitely a learning curve there. And there was definitely like, I would say a difficult year or two. It's gotten better as like I have gotten more in different friends who are even like a little ahead of me in life or in the same stage in life. But then also as other friends have become moms that's become easier. But I do have friends that are either ahead of me, like they've got more kids in me, they're older than me. And then I do have friends who are single. And obviously they don't have kids. And it's just a matter. It's not the same.

Starting point is 00:19:00 Like it's not the same. I will say that. Like the friendship is not the same. It can't really be, at least for me. Maybe for some people, it can't be. But life just pulls you in two different directions. You spend time differently. Your schedules are different.

Starting point is 00:19:13 And I think that's okay. I think it just takes more effort. It takes more commitment to say, okay, we're going to get dinner once a month. Or we're going to still text about the things that we do agree on. But it's also okay if you shift and if you find some new friends. That doesn't mean you should abandon your old friends just because they don't have kids. But it is going to be different. And that's okay.

Starting point is 00:19:34 You don't have to pretend to have the same schedule and the same life and wants and all of that as when you were single. or when you didn't have kids because you do. And mom life is different. And so try to find some friends in your same life stage. All right. Let me tell you all about WeHeart Nutrition. I love WeHeart Nutrition. This is a supplement company that, again, is family owned, owned by Christians who love the Lord.

Starting point is 00:20:02 They're so pro-life. They help support pregnancy centers. But they make supplements that really, really work, that your body really absorbs. So I've been, you know, postpartum for almost a year now. Can you believe that? And so hormones are crazy. I'm feeding my baby. And so I'm depleted in so many different ways.

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Starting point is 00:21:01 Take their 20 second quiz. You can use code Alley for 20% off your order when you check out weheartnutrition.com code alley. If you could have anyone for president, who would it be? That's a good question. Honestly, like, I really do think Ron DeSantis would be a great president one day. I really do. I think he was just and is just such a great governor of Florida. I think he's a really effective leader.

Starting point is 00:21:37 I think he would be a great president one day. So, and maybe one day it'll happen. I would be all for that. How do I deal with a friend who is deconstructing? Well, I think that you have to try to maintain the relationship and you have to try to have honest conversations with her where you start from a place of curiosity where you ask her why she believes the things that she does, how she got there. ask her about some of the stuff that she's reading and listening to.

Starting point is 00:22:12 I think that'll help you understand where she's getting her arguments. Maybe you already know something that happened in her life that you can speak into. But I would, if you're strong in your faith anyway, I would offer to read and listen to some of the things that she's reading and listening to and ask if she'll do the same. And just ask her some questions. Read Tactics by Greg Kokel. That's a really good one. to have persuasive conversations with someone without feeling like you have to win every single conversation and argument. You're just pushing the ball down the field just a little bit every time

Starting point is 00:22:48 by asking really good questions and making them think. Try to maintain the friendship, try to maintain the trust. You don't have to share Bible verses with them every day. You can. The word of God does not return void. So that's fine. But also, I would also just keep this in mind that as you try to maintain that friendship as much as you can, don't compromise your faith. Okay. Don't compromise your faith. Don't be tolerant of the heresies that she might start saying. Don't in the name of like empathy and love start affirming some of the deconstructing narratives she is telling you just because you think that that place of understanding is going to help maintain your friendship. If that starts happening where you feel pressured to start saying

Starting point is 00:23:36 and affirming and agreeing things with things, tolerating things that you know are not true and that are simple, then that might not be a good friendship for you right now. You can love that person from afar. You can pray for them. But like friendship at all costs, I don't think is biblical. Like you have to think about your own mind, your own heart, your own faith as well. Do what you can to be at peace with her and to love her. But if at the end of the day, like she will not allow you to stand strong in your faith without you feeling bad or pressured or whatever, then I would take a break from that friendship.

Starting point is 00:24:17 After multiple tragedies, I found myself, this person says, stepping away from the church due to anger, frustration, and hurt. I still believe in God that every Christian and pastor I've spoken to has just said, trust in God, his ways are always the right ways. He knows better than us. Go to him and he will comfort you. I have a hard time believing that in the midst of multiple tragedies. Thoughts on how to find answers. You know, there was a time in college where I was dealing with a lot of insecurity and I just really hated how I looked. I hated my body. I was, I ended up after a while having an eating disorder just because I was really seeking a lot of affirmation and attention and approval based on how I looked.

Starting point is 00:25:03 Just a very, like, I would have said that I was a strong Christian at the time. I was reading my Bible, but I still was just seeking a lot of the things of the world. And I wanted affirmation beyond what the Bible said, that I was valuable. Like I could read Psalm 139 and read that I was fearfully and one. wonderfully made. I could read John 316 and read that God loves me. But I remember thinking like that wasn't enough for me at the time, which is a really sad place to be. But I remember thinking that. Like I wanted more. I wanted different. I wanted something outside of that. And by the grace of God, he pulled me out of that season and made me realize just the error of that thinking. But the truth is,

Starting point is 00:25:56 is that was wrong thinking. Like I was wrong to think that way, to think that the gospel wasn't enough, that the cross wasn't a sufficient signifier of his love for me. And so as hard as it might be to hear right now in the midst of tragedy, which is a testing of your faith.

Starting point is 00:26:17 I mean, James One actually says that we are supposed to be joyful when we go through trials of many kinds because the testing of our faith produces perseverance, and character. And so it's these trials that are meant to press your faith. They're meant to stretch you. They're meant to test you. And so the fact that you feel strained on your faith right now, yeah, that comes with tragedy, that comes with trials. So know that that's normal. You're not

Starting point is 00:26:42 strange for feeling that way. But these people in your life are right to direct you to scripture. And your thinking is wrong. That that's not enough. It's understandable. I've, I've, I've, I've been there in a different way. I'm not saying I've been through all the same things you have. But no matter what you have gone through, that is the right answer to go to the word and to pray and to renew yourself in the spirit of your mind with the truth of God's word. And do not judge God's power and the power of His word by how you feel in the moment. Okay. It's not a, it's not like a magic wand. It's not an incantation. It's not a spell. Like, this is working out your faith with fear and trembling. That is what faith is, that even when it feels

Starting point is 00:27:32 hard, even when it doesn't feel good, even when you want to turn away, you keep turning to God because despite how you feel, you know that he is better. Like that is, that's what builds our faith. And when the next, when you do that, when you say, I'm going to keep going to this Bible preaching church, I'm going to keep showing up at Bible study, I'm going to keep reading God's word, I'm going to keep worshiping. I'm going to keep praying. I'm going to keep thanking God every single day. I'm going to keep preaching the gospel to myself. When you do that, when you use those tools,

Starting point is 00:28:05 they God has graciously given us to understand him and get through hard times. The next time something hard happens, you will have already exercised those muscles and they will be ready to be used. So it might just be time for humility a little bit to realize like, oh, those people were right. think they're being dismissive of you. I think that they are telling you what is true. You should

Starting point is 00:28:32 ask yourself, what are you looking to hear? What do you want to hear from people? Are you just looking for someone to validate your pain? That's fine. Like your pain is probably extremely justified. But are you looking for someone to authenticate your doubts? Are you looking for someone to say, yeah, you should be shaking your fist at God? Or no, you know what? You shouldn't trust God. Or you know what, you have every right to walk away from God right now. And maybe God doesn't care about you. Is that what you want to hear? Because Christians aren't going to tell you that because it's not true.

Starting point is 00:29:06 Go read the book of Job. You can see how God feels about us shaking our fist and questioning him. I know a lot of people will tell you to have all of your big feelings and shake your fist at God and all of those things. But I don't think that's the way to go. I just don't. So I would say your Christian friends are right. to give you the advice that they have. Let's see.

Starting point is 00:29:33 Anything big on my bucket list? There are so many places, but I want to go. There are so many states that I haven't been to. Maybe not so many. I've probably been to more than the average person, but there's a ton of states that I still want to go to. And I truly think America is like the most beautiful country in the world. We don't have the same history as some other countries,

Starting point is 00:29:56 just because we're not as old as Europe, but we have some of the best scenery and the most fun things to do in the world. So I want to go to all 50 states. And I also want to go to Greece. I've always wanted to go to Greece for a really long time and to follow the journeys of Paul. My parents did that recently. Did not take me. Very rude. So I would like to do that.

Starting point is 00:30:23 And there's a lot of things. There's a lot of places I would like to go. in Europe. So I guess my bucket list has to do with traveling. Yeah, I'm not like a huge travel person. Like I like being home. But yeah, there's a lot of things I would like to see. I don't mind traveling. That's for sure. Let's see. What non-Christian group do I enjoy engaging with the most? That's tough because they all have their challenges. They all have their challenges. But honestly, probably the, probably the person who believes that they're Christian, but really just holds on to like every secular dogma and every left wing mantra, probably those people, because it's

Starting point is 00:31:11 easier to kind of get to a place of commonality and really talk about why we believe what we believe. Okay, Good Ranchers has this incredible deal, incredible deal going on right now in their Labor Day sale. If you subscribe to any Good Ranchers box now, you get a free. free add-on for one year. So subscribe to a box. It'll make your life so much easier. It's what we do. It's how we get all of our meat. You'll be so happy that you did that. But when you do, you also get a free ad on of chicken breast, Angus ground beef, applewood bacon, or wildcut salmon, whatever you want

Starting point is 00:31:48 with every order. That is like $400 in savings. That is an amazing deal. All you have to do is use My Code Alley. Also, if you subscribe and use My Code Alley at checkout, you will get $25 off your first box free express shipping. Go to good ranchers.com code alley. How do I biblically honor my unbelieving mother who has some narcissistic traits? While I think that you can respect her and be kind to her and never return to her narcissism in kind or be snappy or sassy with her, that doesn't mean you have to be best friends with her. It doesn't mean you have to talk to her every day. doesn't mean that you need to allow her to use these narcissistic traits to influence your children. So that's what I would say.

Starting point is 00:32:36 She's still your mom. She's always going to be your mom. We are called to honor our father and mother. And so you can honor her without being best friends with her, without talking to her all of the time. But let her know you care for her. You will need to be caring for her more tangibly the older she gets. And I would say everyone has narcissistic traits to a certain degree because everyone just cares about the self so much.

Starting point is 00:32:59 But maybe you mean in like very intense ways, you can pray for her and maybe even try to get her to do a Bible study with you because it sounds like just like everyone, she really needs Jesus. Okay, if you and your husband were dog breeds, what would you be? You know, we've thought about this. I would be, the kind of dog I would be as a cat. I would be a cat. I'm not a dog breed.

Starting point is 00:33:26 I'm definitely a cat. my husband I think um an Australian Shepherd I think I think that's what we decided like friendly but and with like a lot of energy he always has to be moving he likes to run and um yeah I forget the other reasons why he said Australian Shepherd but that's what that's what we're going to be I'm just a house cat. I don't know how else to say that. Should husbands be able to dictate what their wife wears for modesty standards? I don't like that language. Should your husband dictate what your wife wears? See, that to me, the reason I don't like that is because that sounds more of like a father-daughter relationship than a husband-wife relationship in which the two-ar-one,

Starting point is 00:34:25 flesh and the husband loves and trusts his wife and the wife loves and submits to her husband and respects her husband because yes, wives are called to submit to their husbands. And I do think if a husband said, uh, that's a little too low or that's a little too short or that's a little too tight, I do think a wife should, she respects her husband. She honors her husband. I think she say, oh, yeah, you're totally right. Um, I'm, I'm going to change. Uh, I, I do think that that's how it should go. Now, should the husband be like, okay, this is your wardrobe, this is all you can wear, and I get to say what you get to wear on a daily basis, you can only wear this, you can only wear that, I don't think that that would be a sign of a healthy and godly relationship.

Starting point is 00:35:17 Christian woman, though, you should want to be modest, not just for the sake of honoring your husband, but because God calls us to modesty. Now, primarily in the biblical context, that means humility, but that will come with it some tangible standards for what we wear because if we're talking about humility and how we don ourselves, that means when we get dressed, we are getting dressed, not to draw eyes to ourselves in the form of our body, but to adorn our body in a way that is dignified,

Starting point is 00:35:53 and that honors God that is not trying to get people to covet or to lust. Now, I'm not saying that we have control over other people's thoughts and other people's feelings. But I think a lot of women like play dumb on this. Like they don't know what modesty is. Like they don't know what constitutes as like modest dignified dress. Like we all know. We all know what it looks like. And to be modest and what it doesn't. And so I would say, don yourself in humility and in dignity. And if your husband is to the point to where it's like ridiculous standards to where it just doesn't even make sense, it's not like he's just trying to help assist it out and be

Starting point is 00:36:43 like, yeah, your pants are see-through. You need to change. But it's to the point where it is like this weird micromanaging thing that looks a lot more like Islam than Christianity. I would be concerned about spiritually what's going on there. And I would look for, I would look for the help and the wisdom of an older Christian woman. And maybe her husband who can speak into this situation. That would be troubling.

Starting point is 00:37:06 But as far as it depends on you, be at peace with him and submit to him as long as it does not cause you to sin. And husbands love your wives as Christ loves the church. That's Ephesians 5 and gave himself up for her. That is a self-sacrifice. Proficial love really should never resemble a like father, daughter, weird relationship. All right. The last sponsor for the day is Jace Madical. We don't know what's going to happen in the future.

Starting point is 00:37:38 Hopefully there's not some other kind of pandemic. Hopefully the supply chain stays sturdy for us. But you just never, you never know. There's always the risk of something happening where you're not able to get to the medication that you need through the traditional means. And so you want an emergency stash in medication. You want to get a Jace case. That's an emergency sash of life-saving antibiotics.

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Starting point is 00:38:27 Go to jays.com slash alley for a discount. That's jes.com slash alley. How do we as Christians balance constitutional freedom of religion with wanting our values to be represented and displayed through society and government systems? Well, remember, the separation of state and church is not the separation of God and law. like there is always going to be a belief system that is ingrained in each and every law that we have. Every law is based on what we believe about right and wrong. And so the question is only ever what belief system does this come from.

Starting point is 00:39:15 The founders obviously understood that because even as they wrote the First Amendment, which does not have separation of church and state in there, but it does have freedom of religion that the state is not going to establish a religion and force you to go to that church. They also wrote the Declaration of Independence that says that we were created with certain inalienable rights. We were given these inalienable rights by God. That's why they are inalienable and inherent, why they transcend state power, because they were given to us by a transcendent God whose power is bigger than the governments,

Starting point is 00:39:50 because he predates the government. And so they recognize that even as the state should not establish a religion, that that does not mean that God is out of the public square or that God is not seen in any of our legal documents or that our laws can be devoid of a belief system. That's just completely incoherent. It's illogical. They cannot be. I mean, we see the religion of secular progressivism on display. we see their flags, we see their mantras, we see their philosophies everywhere, ingrained into public school curriculum, in academia, in our laws, in our policies,

Starting point is 00:40:31 and our regulations, all over the public square. We are forced to see it and to tolerate it and even to celebrate it and to affirm their lies. And so what that shows us is that there's always going to be a predominant religion, a predominant belief system. And if that's the case, it may as well be the belief system that has led to the greatest freedom and human flourishing in all of human existence, which is Christianity. That does not mean that the state is establishing a specific Christian church that people have to go to worship. Does it mean that people have to bow down to God? It does not mean that people have to read the Bible or believe the things that we believe.

Starting point is 00:41:12 It's not a theocracy. It's acknowledging that there will always be a dominating belief system. And that Christianity has always been the best one, the best foundation, the best spirit behind all of our laws. And we would do well to continue to have that. And look, you Christian, you Christian conservative, you were told that you are the only one that cannot bring your worldview into the public sphere. You have to check it at the door before you bake the cake, before you design the website, before you make the floral arrangement, before you vote, before you teach, before you talk. but the secular progressive is never told that the liberal so-called christian is never told that the buddhist is never told that they get to bring the full force of their worldview into every place

Starting point is 00:41:57 in the public sphere even into the workplace but when the christian conservative does it they're a christian nationalist and a theocrat don't be manipulated and gaslit by that just as they have every right to bring their belief system and their full ideas to the table so do you and there's a reason why they don't want you to because Christian conservative Christianity, which really just Christianity is the biggest obstacle for tyranny and the biggest spoil on the back of dictators and always has been. That's why they want you to compartmentalize your faith, even as they tell every other belief system to allow their faith to inform how they vote and how they act. All right. That's all we've got time for today. See you guys back here soon.

Relatable with Allie Beth Stuckey - Ep 1059 | After Tragedy, I Can’t Feel God. What Do I Do? | Q&A

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