Relatable with Allie Beth Stuckey - Ep 1328 | From Jezebel to Jesus Follower: How a P*rn Star Got Saved | Brittni De La Mora

Episode Date: April 6, 2026

Former adult star Brittni De La Mora shares her powerful testimony of redemption on "Relatable" with Allie Beth Stuckey, revealing how childhood trauma, abuse, and a desperate search for validation led her deep into the adult film industry, drugs, and prostitution. She opens up about the dark realities of pornography — the depression, manipulation, and spiritual deception she witnessed — and the dramatic moment on a plane when God convicted her through Revelation 2, and she walked away for good. Now a pastor’s wife and co-founder of Love Always Ministries with her husband Richard, Brittni discusses true healing, restoring identity in Christ, reaching porn stars with the gospel, and the devastating effects of porn addiction on both performers and consumers. This raw, hope-filled conversation exposes the lies of the industry and points to the freedom and restoration only Jesus can bring. Share the Arrows 2026 is on October 10 in Dallas, Texas! Tickets are on sale now at: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://sharethearrows.com⁠⁠⁠ Share the Arrows is sponsored by: A'del Natural Cosmetics: AdelNaturalCosmetics.com Range Leather: RangeLeather.com/ALLIE We Heart Nutrition: WeHeartNutrition.com Buy Allie's book "Toxic Empathy: How Progressives Exploit Christian Compassion": ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.toxicempathy.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ – Time Codes 0:00 Introduction 1:24 Brittni’s Search for Validation 13:34 Her Adult Industry Career 19:46 Brokenness in the Adult Industry 25:24 Roundabout Journey to Christ 35:54 Leaving P*rn to Follow God 41:46 Brittni’s Life as a Pastor’s Wife 51:04 Her Parents’ Redemption – Fellowship Home Loans | Start with a free consultation at ⁠FellowshipHomeLoans.com/Allie⁠ and receive a $500 credit at closing. A'del | Visit AdelNaturalCosmetics.com and enter promo code ALLIE for 25% off your first-time purchase. Cozy Earth | Discover how care in every detail transforms simple routines into real comfort. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code RELATABLE for up to 20% off. And if you get a post-purchase survey, be sure to mention you heard about Cozy Earth right here. Good Ranchers | If you go to ⁠⁠⁠GoodRanchers.com⁠⁠⁠ and subscribe to any of their boxes of 100% American meat, you’ll save up to $500 a year! Plus, if you use code ALLIE, you’ll get an additional $25 off your first order. We Heart Nutrition | Check out We Heart Nutrition at ⁠⁠⁠WeHeartNutrition.com⁠⁠⁠ and use the code ALLIE for 20% off.

Brittany Dela Mora worked in the porn industry for over six years, but God radically transformed her life. And now she helps women in the porn industry get out and live redeemed. Her story is absolutely incredible and is so encouraging to us when we remember that God is a god of redemption. He makes beauty out of ashes. You are going to be so edified by the testimony that she shares today. So without further ado, here is Brittany. Brittany, thanks so much for taking the time to join us. Could you first just tell us who you are and what you do? So yes, my name is Brittany Dalamora and I was in the adult film industry for seven years of my life.

Now my husband and I run an organization called Love Always Ministries.com and just launched Jesus LovesPornStars.org. And what we're doing is going into adult conventions, ministering the gospel. We just went to one in January and got to pray over so many consumers. adult industry workers and we help people find freedom from pornography. Wow. Well, I can't wait to get into more of like what that work looks like. What a unique ministry that God has called you to. I first want to hear your testimony. We'll get to how you became a Christian, but let's back all the way up and just talk a little bit about your childhood because that has something to do with the kind of headspace that you were in when you got into the adult film industry. So let's back all the way up.

Yeah, so going back to childhood, I just grew up in a very chaotic household. It wasn't a Christian home. We didn't know God. He wasn't encouraged or discouraged. I really believe because God is love without God, there's just no love in a household, you know? And so it was very chaotic. A lot of verbal abuse, a lot of physical, emotional abuse. I just really grew up with a lot of insecurities and a lot of self-hatred because you internalize the words that are spoken over you. And so I just felt. like I just remember like at 10 years old like going to bed with like a roll of toilet paper like just crying myself to sleep and just like asking like why am I even alive like what is the point of life like just having these questions of no purpose no identity and was I just born to to feel pain my entire life and that's genuinely how I felt and so I made all of my decisions based on that place of brokenness and you say that there was verbal abuse and gosh what pain you must have been feeling as a 10-year-old to be able to just cry yourself to sleep at night. What were some of the things that you were hearing in your home?

You're a loser. I hate you. I wish I never had you. I mean, the list goes on and on things that I could never say on your podcast. Yeah. Gosh, I'm so sorry. And were your parents together? Were they married? They were together, but they were separated. Okay. So if that makes sense. Yeah. And I'm sure that kind of led to the insecurity and instability you felt as a child. Yeah. So tell me more about growing up and then that fateful trip that you took when you were a teenager. Yeah. So when I got to probably about middle school, high school, I just, my search for validation began and I thought, like, I just need to have a boyfriend. I need somebody in my life. And so dated a couple guys here and there. And then in high school, I just started to pursue this guy that I was attracted to. And eventually we started dating and we, I lost my virginity to him.

And then his brother called me and told me that he had cheated on me with three different women. And I was crushed because, of course, in my 16-year-old little heart, I thought, well, this is the guy that I'm going to spend the rest of my life with. And after that, I had told my friends, like, I'm heartbroken. I felt not only rejected at home, but now rejected by the guy that I just gave everything to. And so they're like, well, let's just go to Mexico and party because we live so close to the Tijuana border. So we went out. And in Mexico, by the way, at that time, you could get into any club with a valid high school ID. You're supposed to be 18, but you show your high school ID and they would let you in. And you lived in San Diego. So it was just a drive down. Exactly. Yeah, I lived probably 10, 15 minutes

from the border of that. And so we go to a club. I get drunk. And your parents didn't have, they didn't care. No, they did actually. My mom was very, very strict. She, I think I had told her I was going to spend the night at a friend's house that night, and then that friend's parents were not strict. And they're like, oh yeah, go ahead, go have fun, you know. So we went to a club. It was the first time that I had ever gotten drunk and I went outside to get some food. And I see another club across the way. And I recognize the name of the club because there was some guys in my high school class that would talk about how beautiful the women were. So out of curiosity, like, what do these women have that they're always praising these women? Like, I'm just going to go

check it out. So I go over to the bar and the bouncer was like, you can't come in. And I said, well, I'm not going to drink. Like, I just want to dance because I thought they weren't going to let me in because I was drunk. And they're like, oh, you want to dance. And so he grabs me by the hand. And he said, okay, come on. And he walks me into a club and I'm looking around and I'm like, oh, this is a strip club. And he said, you're going to be up after her. So the way it worked in in America, like there's a changing room backstage. In Mexico, it was like the women are just lined up on the stairs waiting to go on stage for their turn. And so I had liquid courage in a broken heart. I also felt afraid to say no at that point. I don't know. I just, I had a lot of fear in me as a child. So I got up on

stage. I took my top off that night. And there were people saying, you are so beautiful. We love you. And those words that I was hearing in that club are words that I wasn't hearing at home. And so there was just the seed that was planted in me that day that if you take your clothes off, like this is where you're going to find affirmation. This is where you're going to find validation. Yeah. Wow. Okay. So you're up there. You're like, this is the love that I have been longing for. Didn't get it from my boyfriend. He rejected me. I wasn't enough for him. Wasn't enough for my parents. They rejected me. They thought nothing of me. finally like you've been starved of love and affirmation for so long you probably felt like a hungry child that's just like I'm finally getting the thing that I have been searching for so what happened after that uh well I mean I was doing very well in school I was a straight a student um unfortunately I had started struggling with an eating disorder and got put into like a mental institution for anorexia. And so I wasn't able to go to any of the colleges that I had hoped to go to. So I ended up going to Santa Barbara City College. And I was studying, well, at that point it was just general ed,

but my intention was to study broadcasting and journalism. And I was working full time and going to school full time. But I felt so lost. Like, I think because, you know, my mom, you know, she meant well. Like she always wanted to just do everything for us. And so when I get to college, I'm like in my English class, Honors English, and everybody's reading a book and I'm like, what book are you guys reading? They're like, oh, it was in the email, you know? And so I'm just feeling so lost and so confused. So I drop out of that class. And then things just start feeling overwhelming and so hard. And I'm just like, you know what? I miss that validation. So I went back to the strip club. Well, I applied for a job at the strip club in Santa Barbara and got hired that day. And I was still going to college at that point, taking a few other classes. And a couple producers came into the club one night, and they were tipping me quite a bit of money and just telling me that I was beautiful, that I was destined to be a star. They said, we make romance movies. If you're ever interested, give us a call.

I knew that they were talking about pornography. But at that time, I was already taking my clothes off for money and I was already promiscuous. So I just kind of thought, like, you know, they're promising me. I'm going to be famous. Like maybe if enough people know my name, if enough people like recognize me, then maybe somehow like that's going to fill that void in my heart. Like I'll learn to love myself or at least hate myself less. And so it was like that promise of fame that I was like, okay, I'll do it. So I went to L.A. the next day and I, they put me in hair and makeup and continued affirming me and got me connected with an agency. And the agent basically said it's porn or school.

do both. And so I dropped out of school and I made porn my full-time career and things took off for me very quickly. Quick pause to tell you about our first sponsor for the day. It's Adele Natural Cosmetics right now. As we speak, as I'm recording this ad, I am wearing Adele makeup. I've got their moisturizing foundation on, their cream blush, their cream bronzer. As you can tell, it is light to medium coverage. It's super glowy and moisturizing. And I just love how how smoothly it goes on and I love the ingredients. None of them are toxic, no endocrine disruptors, no fake fragrances. That goes for all of their products, even their skincare line. I use their moisturizing essential cleanser every day. It's been a game changer for my skin. I seriously love

Adele products. I've been using them for gosh, probably five years now. But what I love the most is that they are unapologetically Christian pro life. It's a family owned company. They make all of their own stuff in Texas. So if you haven't yet, order from Adele Natural Cosmetics.com. When you use my code Alley, you get 20% off your first order. That's Adele Natural Cosmetics.com code Alley. Okay, I want to go back to the night in Mexico really fast just to finish that story. It's hard for me to understand how like a beautiful 16 year old girl who is naked in front

of all of these men leaves the club, like safely just gets in the car with her friends and then goes back home. and then like you were just able to leave without a problem. Yeah. And then after that night, did you, did that plan a seat in you that I want to do that again? Or did that not really come into your mind until later? You know, I was going through old journals and this is wild. I don't even remember writing this, but I was writing like, how am I going to pay my way through college?

And some of the things that I listed in my journal were stripping prostitution. because I had met a woman in that mental institution when I had anorexia that was there, her parents had put her in there because she was a teenage prostitute. And she had just gotten out of juvenile hall. So she was trying to introduce me to her pimp and glorifying the lifestyle. Like, we have a beautiful home together. And, you know, he buys me everything I want and just, like, glorifying it, right? And so in my mind, I'm like, oh, well, great.

That's a great career choice, you know. And so I actually wrote that in my journal as probably a 17-year-old little girl. Wow. Teenager. Wow. So it was in your head that that was a possibility that would be a good way to make money. Yeah. Talk to me about your eating disorder that you had when you were still in high school, correct?

Yeah. Did that happen after that night after your boyfriend cheated on you? And what was kind of going through your mind then? It did happen afterwards. I don't think I actually correlated the two. I was like an I I used to like idolize celebrities as a as a teenager. We all did when we were teenage girls. And was a huge fan of Mary Kate and Ashley Olson and remember seeing them losing all this weight.

Paris Hilton, Christina Aguilier, like Misha Barton, the tiniest, tiniest people. Yeah. Obsessed with all of them. And my friend and I decided like, hey, let's go on a diet. And like we just wanted to lose 10 pounds. And so we lose 10 pounds. And then we lose 10 pounds. And then from there, like, I just became obsessed with it because because my home was so controlling, it became the one thing about my life that I had control over. And at that age, also, we were in summer school at this point. And there was a guy that's like, oh, you guys were trying to lose weight. Like, my brother sells coke, cocaine.

So we had bought cocaine a few times. And like, that helped us to not be hungry. And I just became very obsessed with being very thin to the point that my mom was like, what is wrong with like something's wrong like you are losing a lot of weight you know you're not eating and so that's when she she had gone through my room while I was at school and found a journal I've always journaled with like my weight like I would put my weight at the beginning of the day and the end of the day and she put me in a mental hospital for you know to try to help me with the eating disorder the parental dynamic is so interesting there because in a way your mom did care you

said that she was strict, but then also that emotional abuse that really shaped you growing up. So it just sounded like a very complex and difficult relationship. Yes, it definitely was. And things have gotten so much better by the grace of God. I mean, she babysits my kids and I mean, she's wonderful. Yeah, I can't wait to talk about the redemption of all of this. So you went to that rehab or that institution. And then after that is when you went to school and you got into a pretextual.

after becoming a stripper and kind of getting scouted by these producers. So you said that after that, after you started things started moving very quickly. What do you mean by that? I mean, I started getting booked almost every, literally every single day. I worked 70-something days in a row before I caught gonorrhea and then wasn't able to work for like a week. And yeah, like STDs run rampant in the industry. They say that they don't. but they do. At the time when I was in the industry, you would get tested every 28 days.

I believe they've changed their testing protocols at this point. But I mean, just because you test, like, you may work with somebody that just slept with somebody at a bar the night before and now for the next 28 days or 27 days till their test, they're now spreading that around. So that was my first ever STD. I'd never had unprotected sex before the industry. And my agent was like, oh, it's just a shot in the butt. You'll be fine. You know, like, everybody gets it. Very just normalized it, you know, like, is that jarring or were you like, okay, if this is the price of fame and money, I guess it's fine. At first, it scared the living daylights out of me. I didn't even know. I was like, is this permanent? What is this? Am I going to die? Like, I knew nothing about it. And he just

really just normalized it. Hey, it's just like getting a cold. It's a shot in the butt. Like, you're, you're going to literally, you're going to get a shot. And it's going to go away and you're going to be fine. everybody gets it. And he really normalized it. And I was like, oh, okay, like I guess, you know. Yeah. So I went and got the medication and it went away and I was able to work again. But, I mean, I was nominated for like Best New Starlet within just a matter of months of being in the industry. So like things really, when I say things took off, like the fame that they promised me. I mean, I never like looked at myself and considered myself famous, but the attention that I was getting was what I had been craving all those years. Yeah. And were you still doing drugs at this point,

or had you stopped that after rehab? So I stopped, but then I was on set with a director who come to find out was just somebody who was really cruel to women. And he told me that I was fat and that if I ever wanted to make it in the industry that I needed to lose weight, I was only like 105 pounds at that time. I mean, a lot thinner than I am even today. and that really triggered something in me because what he didn't know was that I had just gotten out of not only a mental institution, but then I did an extensive outpatient treatment for anorexia. And I was not fully healed. It's just, you know, and so he triggered, it triggered me. And so I saw a woman, I was living at that point in a model house.

So model house is basically agents will, they have like very large houses and they'll rent, each rooms out because a lot of the women in the porn industry will come in from out of town, shoot for like a month, and then go back home to their family. And so I was staying in a model house and I asked a girl, hey, by any chance, can you get some Coke? You know, and she was like super suspicious like, why, who told you? And I'm like, no, no, no. It's just, I just want to lose a little weight. And she goes, oh, yeah, I can get you some. And then she gave me cocaine. And then from that point forward, I mean, I'd only been in the industry for maybe a month or two at that point. I started using drugs every day after that.

Was it just cocaine? Oh, no. I mean, it transitioned from cocaine to nor goes into oxycotton and then to heroin and then to crystal meth for a little bit. I mean, it was Adderall. I mean, I would use just anything I could get my hands on. Looking back, were you trying to numb any pain or guilt? Or was it just that it started to make you feel good, started to make you lose weight and it

spiraled from there, or maybe both? It was both, Anna. It started with the weight loss, but what I realized was, oh, wow, drugs makes doing this kind of work easy. Yeah. You know, because I wasn't much of a woman of conviction. There were very few things that I had convictions over in that industry. And the drugs just kind of like numbed it. Like there were some things that made me feel gross. They made me feel yucky and using drugs just kind of like was like oh whatever like it just it numbs everything um and so yeah and drugs give you this false sense of happiness you know so it was like i mean i talk to people i just was when i was at the porn show just a month ago um ministering i had my old makeup

artist do my makeup and she's like i had no idea you were on drugs like you were the most friendly most kind person, but it was like, it was a mask, you know? It was the drugs that were just like making me feel happy. But it's a false sense of happiness. Okay, y'all, if there's one thing about me, I like to be comfy and cozy. So I really care about my bedding, my sheets, my comforter, my pajamas, my loungewear, my towels, all of that. And that's why I will not settle for less than cozy earth. It is so comfortable, so luxurious. It's all really breathable temperature regulating no matter what product you get. And this is perfect for Mother's Day, y'all.

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their bamboo pajamas, one set, and then another set for free. That's incredible. CozyEarth.com code relatable bogo. How prevalent is drug use in the porn industry? I only know two women when I was in the industry that did not use drugs. I have lost so many people that were co-workers of mine, even in just recent years. Some of the most well-known women in that industry have just recently died of overdoses and suicide. I hear a lot of people say, you know, why should we really care about porn? These are grownups consenting to making videos for people to consensually consume. Sure, we might be personally against it, but why does it matter?

Like, is that an accurate picture of pornography, just grownups consenting to having a good time? Yes and no. I think it might start off that way. but I mean, I have women reaching out to me all the time that are so broken and feel so stuck. So why should we care? Because there's people in the industry that are actually hurting. And most of them won't ever admit it to the public because you have to put on a persona, right? So like I had a stage name. And when I would post on my social media as my stage name, I'm not going to post a photo saying, I am so depressed. I feel like ending my life today. Like I'm not going to show that side. I'm going to

put on a smile and say, hey, guess what, guys, look who I get to work with today. You know, look at what new purse I bought today, you know? And there's so much brokenness in the industry that people would never admit unless they're at their breaking point. I've talked to other people, this was a man who had been in the porn industry. And he talks about how, you know, it started one way where he was doing porn with women. And, you know, he's straight attracted to women. But then it just got more and more intense and more and more aggressive. And then it was gay porn because he could make more money. He was also getting a bunch of accolades.

Like, did you ever feel that, okay, this is spiraling into more and more intense, more and more violent content that is kind of scaring me? Yes. So three years in, like, okay, so up to three years, like I had some very hard nose on things that, like, I was like, I will not. do. I've never even done that in my personal life. I will not do that. But when it came to some aggressive scenes like spanking and like smacking and spitting and pulling hair, like I would agree to those scenes if they would pay me more money. And though I hated it and it felt uncomfortable,

sadly some of it also felt normal to me because of my upbringing. Yeah. There is this big problem and we've talked about like the dangerous of porn hub and everything, but also just like the popularity of adolescent content or like pretending to be adolescent. And that, of course, changes the taste of the people consuming it. Like when you were in the industry, did you see that as a big problem? Yes. So when I say that I was not a woman of conviction, but there were very few things, that was one of the things. So when I first started off in the industry, the reason why I was getting books so much is because I was 18 years old and I look like a little girl. And they would put me in pigtails and costume jewelry and schoolgirl outfits and have me

say, oh, I'm barely 18. One day, a light flickered in me. And I was like, do you guys realize this is encouraging pedophilia? And I'm like, because I'm very protective over children because of my childhood. And I'm like, like, you know, I had to go to my agent and I told him like, hey, I cannot do these scenes anymore. Do not book me for these. It was like I was doing them and then it just, something just hit me where I was like, this is wrong. Yeah. This is not okay. And now that I'm out, like I see that pornography really is a drug. It releases so much dopamine in your brain. And eventually what you watch on porn does not fill you anymore. And so now you have to go re-enact those things in real life. It starts off by hiring escorts. And then, you know,

not enough. And then people are doing things to children and we see that all over and it's sickening. And I truly blame pornography for that because what they're watching, they're feeding their soul and then they start craving that because eventually it's just not enough anymore. I saw a documentary of a guy who had 6,000 images of child pornography when he was rated. Six thousand images from the dark web. It is sickening. It breaks my heart. it angers me. But he started off watching the morally acceptable scenes, the husband and wife, and then started watching the young teenage 18 girl, 18 year old with the old man. And eventually that wasn't enough. Yeah. So after you were in the industry for a few years, I think about three

years, you actually became a Christian. So tell me about that moment. Yeah. I was detoxing from heroin, living in Los Angeles and couldn't get a hold of any drugs. And I called my grandma. And I'm like, I need your help. If you don't help me, like, I'm probably going to end my life because the way that I feel right now is like I just, I'm chasing death. Like I'm, I can't do this anymore. And so she drove up to L.A. and she picked me up and I moved in with her and was able to get Suboxone to help kind of alleviate a little bit of the symptoms and detoxed at her house for quite some time. and her and my grandpa separated. He's remarried to a wonderful woman and they had been going to church. And I asked if I could join them. And so I went to church with them and I just, I don't even remember the whole message, but I just remember the pastor saying that, you know, Jesus wants to give you a second chance at life. And if you would give him a chance, he could turn things around for you. And I'm just like crying. Like, I want that so bad. Have you ever been to church? A handful of times. I don't really remember much. A school bus used to come around in sixth grade. And, My mom would let me go on Sundays.

But it was like a youth group that didn't really teach anything. We just kind of played, you know. So it was like, but I had been to church, you know. And then my nana and Papa took me to church when I was very young, but I don't quite remember it. But I know that my nana, she's 94 years old, has been praying for me my entire life every single day. So God bless her. I love her so much. So I'm just like weeping and I go down to the altar and meet with somebody afterwards.

They give me my very first Bible, and I go back to my grandma's house, and I just start devouring the Bible and started in the book of Genesis, didn't know where else to start. And I'm just reading through it and really start to hear, like, feel the voice of God speaking to me. And so the enemy was not happy about my decision. And at that point, men were my weakness. One of my favorite scriptures in Proverbs is if a bird sees a trap being said, it knows to stay away. And I think that's so important to know what you're traps are because I didn't know what my trap was and my trap was men. My weakness were men. So I dated one man who was in a motorcycle gang and was stabbed to death in front of me. Wow. Did you go back into the, so after that trip to your grandmother's house, though, did you go back into the industry? Were you still making porn? Yes. Okay. So at that point, no, I stopped. Oh, you did stop for a little bit. Yes. So after the guy that I was dating, his friend came in and was a pimp. After he was killed. So after you're at the stand at your grandparents' house, you started reading the Bible and you went back to just kind of like living life.

But you met this guy that you fell for and he was a bad dude. So keep going with that. Okay. So he was in a motorcycle gang and we were out one night and he was stabbed to death in front of me. Wow. And I at this point had moved out of my grandmas, moved in with him very quickly and just really was like, I don't even, I don't want to call my grandma. I was ashamed, you know, like I left my grandma and I'm going through all this trauma and I start using crystal meth and start hearing voices. And that guy's friend came into my life and was like, hey, I'll put you in a hotel room.

I know you have nowhere to go. I was very the most vulnerable place in my life at that point. Wow. And he's giving me drugs and all the things, you know, to build a relationship with me. And then he gets me, he's like, hey, I'm going to like try to help you get off these drugs now. It takes me to a mental hospital. moves me in with him because I can't go moving with my family at this point. And at least I thought I couldn't, you know, I didn't ask anybody. But he's a pimp. And then he gets me back into the adult

film industry for another three and a half years. But he was actually a backslidden pimp. I told him, I thought I was possessed by the devil. He took me to a church. I got baptized. He was a backslidden pimp. What does that mean? A Christian, backslidden Christian. Like he wasn't walking. At one point in his life, he says, I've never seen it, but he says that he was like going to church regularly on fire for God. And then I don't know exactly what happened in his life. But at that point in his life, he was a pimp. Yeah. And not walking with the Lord. But when I told him that I thought that I was possessed by the devil, it kind of freaked him out. And he took me to a church and I got baptized. And then he's like,

I started, I started to feel like a sense of joy for the first time in my life because I'm growing closer to the Lord at this point, not realizing he's a pimp and he's going to get me back into the industry. Yeah. And so I'm off drugs again and he's like, okay, it's time. You're ready. And I'm like, ready for what? And he's like, we're going to get you back in the industry. You're going to be bigger than ever. I love WeHeart Nutrition. I've been using them for a little over two years now and it has been such a game changer for my health. I've gotten multiple rounds of blood work done over the past couple of years just to make sure that I'm optimizing my health so I can feel my best for motherhood and everything that life demands of me.

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When did you say that? What did you mean? So he asked me one night, have you ever seen the Passion of the Christ? I'm like, no, I've never seen that movie. And he's like, well, let's watch it. So we're watching it. And I don't know. I just felt like something was in me.

Like, I don't know. I just felt weird. I felt heavy. I felt like my skin was crawling as I'm watching this movie. and I just looked at him, I said, I kind of think I'm possessed by the devil. And he's like, we're going to take you to church. And so he starts calling some of his old youth pastor friends and, you know, like, what do I do? And so they're like, we'll just bring her to church and get her baptized, but she shouldn't be, I don't know, they were giving him some different, you know, she shouldn't be,

if she receives Jesus, then she shouldn't be possessed, all these things, you know, just different things. And he's like, well, let's just be safe and take you to church. And so I go, he takes me to like an apostolic church. and I get baptized there and yeah I mean I felt like when I came up out of the water I just felt I just felt free like I felt I felt cleanse and I wasn't on drugs anymore and I'm continuing to read the Bible and I started to really feel joy for the first time in my life but the guy that I was with was twisting the scriptures so when I would point things out he's like oh no like because he when he brought back about getting getting into pornography, I'm like, no, I don't think that Jesus would want me to, like, prostitute. Like, it says, like, go and sin no more. And he's like, no, no, no. Like, Mary Magdalene was a prostitute. Like, he loves prostitutes. Like, you know, he loves it. He's okay with it. You know, like things like that. So really like twisting scripture. And I'm like a baby believer here. So I'm thinking, oh, well, he probably knows more than I do, you know. And I'm like,

oh, okay, well, if God's cool with it. And I actually did some very big, like, interviews, even like Howard Stern. And I'm talking about Jesus on those. interviews, like just Jesus is amazing. Jesus is wonderful. Like we should all follow him, you know, even though I'm not fully following him myself, but I'm in those beginning stages of building a relationship with him while in my sin. Okay. So this guy, he's very confusing because he's like, oh, let's go to church. Let's get you off drugs. But also let's get you back into the porn industry. So you did start doing porn again. And you talked about this moment where a Pornographer asked you in one of his videos to be on a cross upside down.

Can you talk about that? Yeah. So there is this website that they're located, this company located out in San Francisco. And they are known for doing very aggressive scenes like with whips and just things like that. And I had worked for them a few times in the past and honestly had no issue working for them. after receiving Jesus as my Lord and Savior, and they didn't know this. I don't think. I don't know if I mentioned it to them, but they had this upside down cross and they're like, okay, so we're going to tie you to this and then we're going to have him whip you. And I'm like, this is an

upside down cross. And they're like, yeah. And I'm like, no, I don't feel comfortable with that. And they were very like, there were certain keywords where if you don't feel comfortable, they're like, okay, they're not going to try to pressure you to do. And they're like, okay, well, then you just don't get paid for this one, you know, because you get paid per set that you do with them. So, but yeah, that was something that I don't know, prior to Jesus, I probably wouldn't have had a conviction towards. But like, after receiving him, I'm just like, this just feels evil and very demonic and I cannot do this. So how long did you continue pornography, though, after that? After that, I was with that guy for about three years. Okay. And during that time, like, did the conviction

grow that this is not right, this is not right. You continue to do it because you felt like maybe it's possible to be a Christian to do this at the same time. But eventually, you realize these two things cannot mix. So that happened eventually. It wasn't, I wasn't growing a conviction necessarily that pornography was wrong. I was, I knew that I didn't like it. I knew that I felt depressed again. I knew that I, it wasn't for me. Like that's how I felt at that point. Like, oh, well, it's just not for me. Like, I don't like it. And one day the pimp and I get in a fight.

And I feel the voice of God tell me to go and take his phone because he had taken mine. And I'm standing outside. And he says, like, go outside. And I'm standing outside, like, with a phone, like, who am I going to call? You know? And I feel God just say, like, Brittany, call your mom. And I'm like, there is no way I can call her. And the Holy Spirit just said, Brittany, humble yourself and call your mom.

And so I called her. She showed up within 20 minutes, picked me up from his house. I moved in with her for a short period of time. Then I go to film what would become my very last porn scene. This is where the conviction came. Before I leave for the airport, I filled the Holy Spirit saying, bring your Bible, the one that I had received at that church three years prior. So I bring my Bible and Revelation was the one book in the New Testament that I had not read yet because I just didn't understand it every time. And I'm like, I'm just going to give this one a shot as I'm on the airplane. Revelation chapter. two verse 20 through 23 is what I get to. And it says, I have this thing against you. You tolerate that woman named Jezebel. She leads my people into sexual immorality. I have given her time to repent. If she doesn't repent, I will cast her and all who commit immorality into a sick bed along with her. Wow. I started crying on the airplane, bawling. And in my heart, I just said, God, I had no idea that this is what I've been doing. I'm that woman named Jezebel.

I'm leading your people into sin. I hate my life and I'm breaking your heart. I'm sorry. Forgive me. And I felt the voice of the Holy Spirit to say, Brittany, I love you so much. And this is not the life that I have for you. The life that I have for you will overflow with so much love and peace and joy.

and if you would just quit this industry today, I would bless your life like no man ever could. What happened after that? I went to set that day and I told everybody on set the exact word that Jesus gave me. I said, hey, guys, I want you to know this isn't the life that God has for us. He loves us so much. He has a better life in store and I'm already like trying to evangelize. And these people are like, this girl is crazy. They're like, are you okay?

Like, are you going to do the scene? Like, we paid for your flight. We paid for a hotel. All the things, you know, makeup's here. And I'm like, yeah, but this is the last time that you're ever going to see me. And I could you not. I regret doing that scene. I wish I wouldn't have. But it was the most awkward scene I had ever done in my seven-year career. I just, the whole time, for the first time, felt a heavy conviction as I was performing. Couldn't say the things I used to say. Couldn't act the way I used to act. Like, It was just everything about it was awkward and uncomfortable because I had a conviction for the first time. And I knew that I would never go back to that industry. And I've been out for 14 years. What did life look like immediately after that? How did you get your footing? Yeah, it was rough. I mean, finding a job after doing pornography since you were 18 years old felt impossible.

I applied everywhere I could. I finally found a job after months of trying. and I was making like $11 an hour at a limousine company. And I mean, I survived. Like, it was hard. It wasn't easy. And it's why when so many women reach out to me and they want to quit the porn industry, they're like, but I'm not going to be able to pay my bills, but I'm not going to be able to drive my car.

I'm like, I know. That's the point. You're going to have to humble yourself. You're going to have to get rid of all of these things. You're not going to be able to afford them. It doesn't mean that maybe one day you can't get some of these. things back, but you're going to have to change your life to follow Jesus. You can't have all of this and follow him. It's just not, it's, it's not going to work. And it's the thing that I think keeps so

many women stuck, but I was so broken that I was like, I don't care if I'm making $11 an hour. My bank account is empty, but my heart is full. And people think, like, I get a lot of accusations. Oh, well, you left that industry with millions of dollars. No, I made millions of dollars, but the first three years, I spent it all and just dumb things, drugs and, you know, name brand everything. And then the next three years, I was giving it all to a pimp. So no, I didn't, I left that industry with my last check and it was only $1,500. So I literally had nothing. And I just, I was hungry for Jesus. And so I find that job. I start going to church and get very involved in church. I mean, the couple days that church wasn't open, I was like, why aren't you open? Like, I just need to be here. You know, I started serving in every ministry

that I could serve in, working full-time and then driving to church and just, you know, I just fell so in love with Jesus and beyond church. It was every morning I would wake up hours before I had to go to work and I would pray and worship and read my Bible and just spend time with Jesus. And he just started healing my heart and giving me the strength to forgive every single person that had hurt me and like truly changing my life in his presence. Okay, y'all, if you have not ordered good ranchers yet, what are you doing? Great Mother's Day present. Great summer present to you.

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Go to good ranchers.com. Use my code alley. You'll get $25 off your first order. That's good ranchers.com slash alley code alley. How did you meet your husband? So when I started going to the church that I was going to, it's a whole other dating the wrong person kind of story. A guy on Facebook had hit me up and he was a high school friend and he had scriptures on his page. So I was like, do you go to church? And he's like, yeah, I said, can you take me to church? Because I didn't know you could kind of like just go.

I thought you had to go with somebody. I didn't know, you know. So he takes me to church. We start dating. We're intimate. And I start getting convicted by messages. And he's one of the people that just goes, to like all different kinds of churches not plugged in or anything like that. And this girl from a Bible study that I started going to kept inviting me to the young adult ministry. And I was like, no, I don't want to go. My boyfriend won't go. And she just kept inviting me. And it's so funny, because I think I got like so like, fine. You keep inviting me. Like you're that annoying Christian that won't stop it. I'm going to go. Okay. I'm going to go. And I'm so grateful that she never stopped inviting me because there was, I didn't know he was going to become my husband, but he was preaching,

he was the young adult pastor at the time, and he was preaching a message that literally changed my life. Like, in the middle of his message, he said, I have to stop for just a minute because I feel like God is wanting me to speak to the women right now. And we're all like single, nobody's married. And he says, ladies, I want you to know that you are a woman of God and that you are worthy of real true love. He said, if your man is not treating you as a woman of God, he needs to step up. or step out, show him the exit sign because you're worthy of real true love and you're worth the weight. And I, again, it's one of those crying moments because the guy that I was dating, not only did he want to be sexually intimate, but I was still looking for a job at that point. He was encouraging

me to go to the strip club because at least I'm not having sex. And so I'm like, I receive that word. And I'm like, God, even though I'm deep, I've, I've sinned so much, like, I'm worthy of love. And even though, like, I've been in the porn industry, like, I'm worth the weight, you know, like, that message just really spoke to me. And so I broke up with him and I said, I'm going to take an entire, for me, this was a long time, an entire year off of dating. And I'm just going to grow in you, Lord, like no distractions. And it was about two years later. I had started serving in the young adult ministry and every other ministry that I could serve in at our church. And my husband and I just became very good friends. And then one day, about two years, after me being a Christian, he asked me out, and we got married about a year and a half after that. Yeah, and now you all have two girls. Yeah, so we just celebrated 10 years of marriage. Congratulations. Wow, that's amazing. Thank you. Tell me how all of the experiences that you've had and the testimony that you have has shaped how you mother your girls. Yes, I think that I understand the weight of our words. You know, our words can set our children.

up for success or they can make them question who they are at the core of themselves. And so I encourage them daily with the word of God. I pray, and I don't do it perfectly, but I pray that God leads me in my parenting because I'm a first generation technically Christian and just learning all this on my own. And I know the importance of what it means to have a strong and healthy marriage because I didn't see that. I saw a lot of fighting and a lot of chaos and how that impacted me. So, like, we're very careful. And when we make mistakes, repair is so huge, like being humble enough to say, hey, I messed up and I'm so sorry. And I shouldn't have said that. And just knowing that if I raised my children with the truth of God's word and I love them well, I know that hopefully

they will never have to question who they are. And I know that they'll never even enter or the thoughts of even entering that industry will never cross their mind because people who enter that industry you've you cut you act like you have a lot of confidence because you're doing all of this but there's a deep root of insecurity there's a deep root of just wanting validation and wanting to be loved yeah tell me about the ministries you have now that help women get out of this industry you already said that it's hard because they don't have any money a lot of times so what are you all doing to help them yeah so As of right now, we are going into adult conventions and we are shared...

What are adult conventions? So think of like a shoe convention or, you know, just conventions, right? Like a conference or... Okay. How about the podcast convention they just did? The NRV. The NRV. Okay.

So it's like a convention like that. Okay. But it's women who have booths or companies that have boots and women are signing autographs and they are selling movies and meeting with their fans and things like that. So what we did in January was we went in. We had 150 gift bags for women that say Jesus loves porn stars because we're called to be fishers of men. And in those, we give out gifts and we give out the book of John and were there to support them and to pray over them. And there were so many consumers that we got to connect with and just praying over them. I mean, there were married couples in there that

were asking for prayer. There was a man. who was like, pray for me. I'm being a really bad Christian. He recognized me from our ministry. And I'm like, what do you mean? And so we just got to pray over him. He, you know, his spouse didn't know that he was at a convention. He's been a Christian his entire life enslaved to pornography, tried to get free for so many years and just has been stuck. And so it's just really incredible what gets to happen on those showroom floors. So we do that. And then my partner, Pastor Rachel, who actually used to go into conventions while I was in the industry and minister to me. She's a big reason why I got out.

Her and I have partnered together. So she also works for a mental health clinic. So we offer mental health resources, financial provision when needed. And we help them transition from the porn industry to a normal way of life. Last sponsor for the day is fellowship home loans. Spring is a time when a lot of people start thinking about moving over the summer. find a new house or maybe refreshing their own home or refreshing their finances. And right now, as rates are dropping, you got to call my friends from Fellowship Home Loans because they can really help

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credit at closing. Terms apply. See site for detail. fellowship home loans, mortgage lending by The Book. Do you have any stories of any women who have left? So I have a few. One of my favorites is a woman who, before she even got in the industry, she was researching stories of women who had left. And she came across my story. And so she remembered that.

And she got into the industry for a couple months, reaches out to me. And she said, I don't want to be doing this anymore. But I got kicked out of my house. and, you know, my grandma passed away. My dad won't let me live there. And I have nowhere to go. So I talked to my husband.

I said, we have a spare room. This was before we had children. I said, can she just come stay with us? So she came and lived with us for a couple days. And she ended up leaving. And I was heartbroken. I'm like, where are you going? And she's like, she had talked to her agent.

And she decided to go back. So I faithfully prayed for her for over a year. And I went to the convention to minister. And I ran into her. and her and I got reconnected, and then she reached out to me again, and she ended up leaving the industry a couple weeks later. She's now married with two beautiful daughters living on the East Coast. She's been out of that industry for this before I had kids, so at least seven or eight years. And so that's one of my favorite stories, because that's such a redemption story,

and she's been able to get a great job and living a wonderful life now. Praise God. Okay, how can people support you in your ministries? So we have Jesus Loves PornStars.org and people can support through financial support through prayers. As we continue to go into more conventions, we will need volunteers. So signing up for the newsletter is a great way if you have a heart and can be in that type of environment without being tempted. And then we have Love Always Ministries.com. That's more of like our books, courses and teachings. You said something that I think is important to touch on.

you said that your relationship with your mom really was redeemed. Yes. And I don't know about your dad, but I would love to finish by just talking about how God has helped restore that relationship. Yeah. So it started off. I was going to church, and I remember the feeling just so led to just pray for her. And at first, it was very hard because I had a lot of hurt in my heart.

But I kept pressing into prayer, and all of a sudden I just felt a wave of mercy come over me. And I felt like rather than feeling like she was so mean to me, my perspective shifted. And I felt like, how could somebody treat somebody like this if they didn't have their own brokenness? And rather than being upset with her, I then felt bad. And it was like the love of Christ just came through me. And I was able to love her like Jesus. And so it started, the relationship started with a lot of boundaries, you know, that first year specifically. I could only go around for a little bit because I would get triggered. You know, she might say something unintentionally that would trigger.

And I was still healing, you know, it's not, I wasn't fully ready. So anyways, the Lord starts just healing that relationship little by little over time. And then it got to the point where we could, you know, take trips to, you know, drive a couple hours away together. And, you know, and now, unfortunately, I moved. So we're not in the same city. But when I do go down, I was just down there for a women's conference recently. and she took my children and took them out for a fun day. And the Lord has really restored our relationship.

And he's grown her so much. And like she's such a loving grandmother. And she's thoughtful and she's kind. And that's one thing. She's always been thoughtful. Like she's always been the person that would give the shirt off their back to a homeless person if she needed to. Like she's just always had some great qualities about her that she instilled in me as well. But just to see her grow and thrive as well is such a beautiful thing.

And my relationship with my dad, we've always been good. He was really kind of like the fun parent growing up, but we've always had like a stable, a stable relationship in that sense. Well, thank you so much for sharing and for sharing about that redemption. I just really appreciate you. And I really do encourage people to support you and to support your ministry. So thank you so much. Thank you for having me. It's truly an honor.