Relatable with Allie Beth Stuckey - Ep 35 | The Paradox of Likability Within Christianity

Episode Date: September 6, 2018

On Tuesday, we talked about the paradox of likability as it pertains to politics and the Republican Party. Today, we discuss the paradox of likability within Christianity and specifically, how it may be used by a few Christian teachers to preach a false gospel — the "gospel of self-fulfillment." Then, Q&A. Copyright CRTV. All rights reserved.

What's up, guys? Welcome to episode 35 of CRTV's Relatable. Thanks for being here. Y'all are the best. My name is Ali Stucky. I'm your host. As you know, you can listen here or anywhere you get your podcast. You can also watch me on CRTV.com where you can subscribe with the promo code, Allie 20. Okay. So Tuesday, we talked about the paradox of likability as it pertains to politics. Today we are going to talk about it as it relates to Christianity. And it's really going to be kind of brief because I've talked about this before, but I've gotten questions specifically on this topic, so I at least wanted to address it. And what I want to address is how likeability is used by some teachers to preach what I and others refer to as the gospel of self-fulfillment. So like I said, I've gotten

a lot of questions from you guys about what I think about certain teachers. like Jen Hatmaker, Stephen Ferdick, Rachel Hollis, Glennon Doyle. These are just a few of the people. Carl Linz can probably be added in. And first, I don't necessarily want to say that all of these people are the exact same because I don't think that they are. Gin Hatmaker is known for unbiblical beliefs. Just follow her social media pages.

She believes, for example, that gay marriage is the exact same in that it's just as biblical as marriage between a man and a woman. She is a major advocate of social justice of all kinds. That's not necessarily unbiblical. Depends on what you're actually advocating for. But in her case, she advocates for lots of things that aren't necessarily in line with Christ's teachings. Stephen Ferdick is the pastor of a megachurch in Charlotte called Elevation. He is an author as well, and he is known to say some very questionable things about God for the pulpit.

When asked John MacArthur, whom we all love here, gave a one word answer about what he thinks about him and it was unqualified. He recently said in a sermon that Jesus cannot overcome your unbelief. That's not taken out of context. That is not putting words in his mouth. That is blasphemy. Jesus can do whatever the heck he wants with your belief or unbelief. He is God. He authored your faith. He, Stephen Fridic is a prosperity teacher. He says things like, you know, if you want to change your heart, change your habits. that might be true for a motivational speaker to say, but he is a pastor, he's a biblical teacher, he's supposed to be exegetical. Jesus changes your heart, which changes your habits,

not the other way around. Rachel Hollis is a blogger, and she recently wrote a book called Girl Wash Her Face, and I'll get more to that in a second maybe. And Glidden Doyle, she is definitely the one out of all of these people that I have the most, problems with. She was a Christian author and blogger. Now, she still considers herself that, but she was a Christian author and blogger when she was married to her husband. She wrote about marriage and motherhood. She had a really well-selling book about marriage, about living in Christian life, about being faithful. Then while she was married, she fell in love with a woman. Her name is Abby Wambach of soccer fame. She left her husband for Abby, with whom, her husband, with whom she has

three kids, and she married Abby Wambach. She is still a, quote, Christian teacher. She still writes books about Christianity. She is all about her some intersectionality and social justice and feminism. She, of course, is endorsed by Oprah by Reese Witherspoon. She is exactly the type and really the only type of Christian that is acceptable to Hollywood in the mainstream because she gets to claim Jesus, but doesn't actually believe any of the culturally inconvenient stuff that the Bible in Jesus actually teaches. She just endorses everything the secular world endorses, is an active participant in it, and gets to claim a sense of righteousness because she is a Christian.

And Carl Linz, we know he routinely compromises biblical truth for culturally popular stances. So all of these people are different. I'm not saying that they're on the same level. I am not making any pronouncements about anyone's ultimate salvation here. That's not up to me. I'm really not one to announce people a heretic either. But all four of the main people that I listed, I guess, in addition to Carl Lentz, they have two things in common.

One, they are insanely likable. And two, they use their likeability to preach the gospel of self-fulfillment. On Tuesday, we talked about how likability is really a double-edged sword. It gives you the power to win people over to good causes, but it also gives you the power to win people over to bad causes and bad ideas. It gives you the power to compel, but it also gives you the power to manipulate. I believe that the people that I have listed likely have a lot of good intentions,

and some, if not most of what they say is true. But I just worry that their likability is allowing people to believe in a gospel that is not the true biblical gospel of Jesus' death and resurrection, but rather is a gospel of self-fulfillment that says, your ultimate goal in life. The chief purpose that God has for you on this earth is that you become successful, that you chase and accomplish your dreams, that you become everything that you want to be in life.

That is the bold life that God has in store for you, they say, and if you just believe in yourself, and if you just let go of fear, then maybe you can get there. And maybe some of you are listening and thinking, well, where's the lie? isn't that what God wants for us? The simple answer is no.

And the more complicated answer is not necessarily. The gospel is that Jesus laid down everything and died on a cross for our sin so that our sins could be forgiven and we could live forever with him. The purpose in life is to share that gospel with our words and deeds, to glorify God because of who he is and what he's done for us. That might include becoming successful. that might include being an entrepreneur, that might mean that your dreams of being famous of making a lot of money come true, and that's all great. It might mean those things, but it also might not. And even if you never reach your career goals, even if you never go on all of the adventures that you've planned in your life, your purpose and your worth as a Christian does not change. Because your purpose

is to deny yourself, to take up your cross and to follow Christ, and your worth is dependent on Jesus. that's it. Neither of these things require or guarantee monetary or earthly success of any kind. There is this lie that I've heard perpetuated by all of the people that I listed in their books, speeches and sermons, which I haven't read all of, by the way, so I'm not trying to make a judgment about their entire life. But it's this idea that your goal in life is to be happy, to be confident, to do all of the things that you want to do in life without fear or doubts. I'm sorry, but that's not why Jesus came to die. He did not come to die so that we could be happy. He didn't come to die so that we could just feel comfortable in our skin. He didn't come to die so that we could chase after our dreams. He came to die

so that we could die to ourself and that we could live for him and with him forever in glory. And like I said, that might include all kinds of earthly treasure and success. And I think it's okay to hope that it does. No one wants to have a miserable life filled with, you know, tribulations going around crying in your sackcloth and ashes. I am not saying that's what we should pursue, but I am saying that our goal, our focus, our motivation, the thing that wakes us up in the morning. The thing that inspires us to read our Bibles, to pray, to be close to God, should not be what he can give us or what milestones he can help us reach, but rather this simple joy of knowing and obeying and loving the one who saved us. And look, I'm going to be really real.

I like the gospel of self-fulfillment. I do. It makes me feel good. I am naturally attracted to it. I'm an ambitious person. I've always been encouraged by people, but my parents to dream big. And I do. I have a lot of goals. I want to chase those goals. I like to believe that God's main goal for my life is to fulfill my own dreams. I like to believe that God is a capitalist. I like to believe that God is just along for the right of my life and that he is going to bless me along the way and to give me his favor. But that's not how this works.

He planned my life. He mapped it out. He chose me not to serve myself, but to serve him. And all I am called to do is to obey, whatever that might look like. But in my flesh, in my sinfulness, I don't like the idea that that plan might not include what I want to do.

I don't like the idea that bringing Him glory might not bring glory to myself. So I understand where this gospel of self-fulfillment comes from. It is a way to bless our selfishness. It is a way to shroud selfish ambition with righteousness. And worse than that, it doesn't save us. We are not saved by or for the gospel of self-sufficiency. fulfillment. And therefore, it's not the story that we need to be telling other people, that God is going to bless you if you pray hard enough, be confident enough, and be nice enough, that you're going to be

everything that you've ever wanted to be. That is not what the Bible tells us. The Bible tells us as Christians we are going to suffer, that we are going to be persecuted, that we are going to be seen as stupid, that we're going to be depicted as people who are weak. The Bible says that life sold out to Christ is going to be hard at some point, that it's going to be uncomfortable, that it's going to be really inconvenient, that we're not going to always get everything that we want, that sometimes we might be cheated, we might be beaten, we might be pushed back or set back. God doesn't promise to save us from these things, actually, but he does promise that it's going to be worth it. The Bible says that for the joy set before him, Jesus endured the cross. That's the Christian life, too.

for the joy that's in heaven we endure hardship and even crucifixion in this life. Fulfillment, Christian fulfillment is found in losing yourself, not finding yourself, as these pseudo-Christian teachers would have us belief. All the things these people promise you, happiness, confidence, fearlessness, security, boldness, courage, they can all be found in so much fuller and more satisfying, more lasting, eternal ways in Christ. The gospel of self-fulfillment is popular because it deprioritizes all the not is fun stuff about Christianity. All the stuff that makes being a Christian really hard. Like sharing the gospel and claiming Jesus is the only way to heaven, as the Bible says.

Like standing up for biblical truth in a world that tells you that the Bible is bigoted. Like disagreeing with people's lifestyle, even though you like them as people, like denying yourself. And I think the hardest part about it is that it's being pushed by people who are very likable. People who use their charisma and relatability to convey a message that is not the gospel and is not biblical. They tickle our ears, as the Bible says. They may be unintentionally, maybe not deliberately at all, make us feel okay about our sin because, hey, God's priority is that we feel good, that we're comfortable, that we're confident. They de-emphasize holiness, sanctification, righteousness, sacrifice. And who doesn't want that?

What sinful human doesn't want to be able to get the benefits of Christianity going to heaven without doing the hard stuff? This is trendy Christianity, pushed by trendy people who think that Christianity needs their help and making it more attractive and relevant. And I think what makes them attractive as well, is that not everything they say is a lie. And really, Rachel Hollis, I've only read some of her book. And so I don't know enough about her to say that she has a false teacher or something.

But I think she does kind of fit into this self-help category that I think can be dangerous for Christian teachers to enter into. But most of these people, they start out with the truth. They start out with making you feel good. And then they just slip the lion that God is okay. with your sin, that God is okay with your selfishness because he just wants you to be happy. The downside to likability is that some of our most likable Christian teachers spread a message that is not true and at the very least manipulates the gospel in a way that takes our eyes

off of Christ and onto ourselves. That is what this new hipster social justice, social media Jesus is attempting to do. It's an attempt to try to make Christianity more of what they might say is a big tent to attract more people to make the cross of Christ more attractive. The cross of Christ doesn't actually need our help in being more attractive. The cross of Christ has been sufficient in saving people for thousands of years. And just because it's 2018 and all of a sudden for the first time maybe ever, it's inconvenient and uncomfortable and unpopular to be a Christian in America,

doesn't mean that we need to be compromising the truth in order to fit in. The church, I heard Matt Chandler say this once, the church thrives on the margins of society. It always has. When the true church and true Christians really grow and really do the work that matters for eternity, it's when we are pushed to the margins, when we are persecuted, when we are pressed. And so we don't need to resist that. Christianity might go out of the mainstream more and more as our lifetime goes on. And that's okay. That is not a free pass to try to make it culturally relevant or culturally convenient. I think all the more we need to stand firm in truth. And that's why I worry about these false teachers that kind of have silver tongues, as people would say, that make us think that Christianity is supposed to be happy, go lucky all the time. I think that Jesus's life, can probably tell us that that's not true.

So I just wanted to kind of quickly say that. I know that some of these teachers are people that you guys probably like. And again, I'm not condemning every single thing that they say. I don't think you are a bad person for liking a lot of what they say. But I would say be discerning. Take what they say with a grain of salt because even though it might sound like a good motivational speech, you should be asking yourself, since they purport to be a deliverer of the gospel and Christian teachers,

if what they are teaching is truly biblical. Okay. So that's it. But I wanted to spend the rest of the time answering the questions that you guys have sent me. They're on my phone, so I need to pull them up. You guys have been sending me a lot of questions over the past few days. And I really appreciate that. Okay.

This is from someone on Instagram. Hey, Ali. I was wondering if I could get your thoughts on some. thing. I tried out a Christian worship service on campus called a crew tonight, and things were going pretty well until it was the time for the sermon. The message was great, but what confused me was that a woman delivered it. Am I just confused about the authority a woman can actually have in church? I've listened to your podcast and read the Bible, though, and I think it's pretty clear, or is it different because it's a campus ministry? This was a group of college age men and women by the way. So there's

probably going to be a few different opinions on that. Um, so I, would be curious to know, that's a little bit difficult. So the Bible says that women within the church are permitted to teach children and other women. They are not permitted to teach over a man. Now, the lines traditionally have been blurred. What does that mean? Is a woman able to go on stage during church and kind of give any kind of word of inspiration? Is she able to read the Bible? Is she able to say a blurb or does it just mean a full sermon? And does it really really? just mean within the four walls of the church or does that include, you know, Christian conferences like passion or in your case, you know, campus ministries? And I do think it's complicated. However, I think the

Bible's implications are pretty clear that it's within any context of Christian teaching that a woman should not be exercising any kind of authority over a man. Now, that obviously doesn't bleed into secular roles. I don't think that women can't be leaders, congresspeople, even the president one day, CEOs of Fortune 500 companies, whatever it is. But the Bible is clear that within the context of teaching from God's word, a woman is not to exercise authority over man. So I mean, maybe crew in this case has good intentions, but no, I don't think it's

correct that a woman should be teaching men, unless those men are, you know, underage boys that would consider them, I guess, that would qualify them as kids. So I would talk to someone about it. I don't think that means you necessarily need to denounce this group as a bunch of hairtics, blasphemers, and false teachers. They might have a lot of good things to offer, but I would talk to someone about it just to see what their interpretation of it is. Maybe they say, huh, you know, I hadn't really thought about it this way. We try to give everyone an equal opportunity to talk, but I'm going to, you know, pray and seek counsel about this. Or if their response is, you know, that part of the Bible just really doesn't matter to us,

then that should give you a pretty good indication of how much they respect God's word. But don't write them off. Try to have an actual conversation with them. Try to, you know, be empathetic towards their position and to seek other counsel as well. But I think you're right. The Bible is pretty clear about whether or not women are to exercise authority over. for a man in the context of church. Okay. Can you talk about what it's like to be on FNC and HLN, FNC being Fox News?

And especially your first few times getting hair and makeup done and being on air. I'm just so impressed with your career. Well, thank you so much. So being on Fox and on HLN, I've been on MSNBC, other networks as well, it's nerve-wracking. I still get nervous every time. there are some people who say that they don't get nervous before they get on camera. I get nervous

before I do anything. I don't really get nervous, I guess, before my podcast, but I get nervous when I'm going to speak. I get nervous when I'm going to be on TV. Whenever I have to be speaking publicly, I get nervous, even though it's something I like to do and I think that I'm gifted in. I do get nervous. I practice a lot before each TV hit, usually. It kind of depends on the importance of it and what the topic is. But I research a lot, especially if I'm talking about something like the midterm election, something more political and detailed like that. I try to memorize as many facts about it as possible. Some people are just good at kind of being on the fly and just making stuff up as they go. I'm not really quite as good at that in those kind of situations

where I am sitting in front of a camera and I know I'm live on national television. So I spend a good amount of time really preparing for those hits, researching, then writing out my talking points. And to the best of my ability, I try to memorize my talking points. That doesn't always happen. Sometimes I end up saying something differently. But especially if it's a subject that I'm not super familiar with, then I try to really memorize everything that I say. Also, in regards to getting hair and makeup done, I don't like getting my hair and makeup done.

I know there are a lot of people out there that are really good at hair and makeup. makeup, but I just don't like it. I'm really particular about my makeup, really, really particular. And I have this fear, this just panic, panicking fear that I am going to go get my makeup done by someone, say I don't have any makeup on. And then it's going to be like two minutes before I'm supposed to go on air and I look in the mirror and I look horrible. I look like a totally different person. I just don't trust that. I just don't trust it. So I do my own hair and makeup. and if I need touchups, they give it to me. But I don't like it.

I don't like it. I trust people, I guess, more with my hair than my makeup because I feel like it's harder to mess up. Maybe it's also because I'm a little bit of a control freak. But yeah, I like to handle my own appearance. And now I actually do my news hits from home, which has been really nice because the bureau here where you go to actually do your hits is a ways away. So I do all of my hits from home.

And then, of course, I have to do my hair and makeup here. but it's totally worth it. It saves me a lot of time to be able to be from here. But yeah, it's really fun. If you ever get the opportunity to be on Fox or to be on any other network, then definitely take it. One piece of advice that I would give you is one, don't underestimate how much you need to prepare and actually memorize because when you get in the moment, you think that you're going to be able to wing it. If you get nervous, like I do, sometimes you end up just babbling. Something that I tried to work on on air, obviously I don't accomplish that on this podcast, but something I try to work on air is answering in pretty short burst.

Doesn't always happen. Sometimes you have a lot to say. But on TV, I try to talk in pretty short burst. And always look at the camera. I've noticed lately a lot of young people have a hard time looking straight into the camera. They kind of look off the whole time. That's super awkward. Don't do that. Look at the camera as much as you can. Don't like look down, especially don't look to the side. But that's it. Yeah. It's a really fun experience to be on TV. It's not my favorite thing that I do. It's not the best thing that I do. I'm not the best at that out of all the things I do. But it is really fun. The first time I was ever on TV was last, not this past April, but the one before. And it was Fox and Fringe the first time I was ever on TV. And now it's been a little over a year. And I still get nervous, but hopefully I've gotten a lot better at it.

And I am a lot more confident at my ability to make something up if I need to because that definitely happens. Someone said, if you could be a grape or an apple, which would you be in why? A grape or an apple? Well, I have zero desire to be an inanimate object. But I guess if I had to choose maybe a grape because I feel like they have a really good life until they're made into wine or something like that. I would like to be a grape that's made into wine. because they're in pretty cool parts of the world. Like I would like to be in France or California or somewhere like that. Apples, I don't know.

I feel like their life is kind of boring. But a grape, maybe you get the chance to live in an exotic place. So I would say a grape. Who is your favorite Democrat personality to be on TV with? Oh, gosh. I don't know. There's a lot of good people on television. I really like, like, for example, I like Michael Starr Hopkins.

He's a Democrat that I just think is a really smart and very sweet person, even though we really disagree. Like, he was kind of aggressive the other day on television. But then he ended up messaging me and apologizing after, which just means that he's a good person and I would do the same thing. Ben Kessel is also a Democrat that he's just funny. And we're actually paired together on air quite often. Haven't been in a while, but we just have kind of a good dynamic. Like he's funny and sarcastic. And so I think that probably works well.

I haven't been on. I don't think with Jessica Tarlov. I don't think that I've been on with her. But I also like her. I think that she has a really good perspective on things. Yeah, there's one other person. I think his name is Robin, that he was a nice guy. But I can tell you the worst Democrat.

to be on with. She's actually basically a socialist. Her name is, I actually don't even know how to say her last name. Anna Casperino, Casperina, she's of the young Turks. She is quoted saying that she just admitted that she just thinks that she's better than everyone who doesn't think the same way politically. At least she owns that. She is condescending. She is mean. She goes after you personally when you're on air. There's nothing worse than that. There's nothing worse than having. having a legitimate conversation with someone that you think is going to be legitimate on the other side of the aisle on air. And then they try to come after you and your character and your integrity just for stating an opinion. She is one of those people. Actually, I think everyone at the Young Turks,

they're kind of currently on a little kick of being obsessed with me. It's fine. I just think that they're the worst of the worst. They're the worst. They're so mean. They go after people's just person and I think that that's wrong. So least favorite Democrats to be on air with would be her. And there's a couple other people that I'm on with on HLN that are just race baiters that only think that everything is racist. I had this debate one time about whether or not we're celebrating the 4th of July. The two Democrats I was on with, they said that no, they wouldn't because Trump is so awful. They're not feeling patriotic. This one guy said, 4th of July is racist. I hate conversations like that because there's just no,

there's no good way for a white girl like me to come out on top. Okay. If you could have dinner with Jesus and one other person, past, present or future, who would you ask to join you in Jesus and why? Ooh. I know this is so like the Christian of me. Hmm. Oh, gosh. Oh, man. I don't know. That's really difficult. So I love C.S. Lewis. I love C.S. Lewis and J.R. Tolkien. I think it would be awesome to sit down with them. I would love to meet Ronald Reagan. I have no idea if we would get along me and all of these people. But I feel like, I feel like C.S. Lewis and I would probably get along. So I would really like to sit down with C.S. Lewis and Jesus. Sure. I think that would be great. Maybe like, Esther. I think she's probably, she's pretty badass. I would, I would like to sit down with her. But I think I would say C.S. Lewis of all of the people. But maybe also my mom's mom who died before I was born, way before I was born. Also, also, because you didn't just say people who died.

You said people in the present or people in the future. I don't know anyone from the future yet. I'll let you know if I meet them. But you could also, you could also invite someone to sit down with you, that does know about Jesus and who better to tell someone about Jesus than Jesus himself. So I might get some pushback for this, but it would be interesting to sit down with President Trump and Jesus, not saying that he's not saved. I'm just saying there's some sanctification that still needs to be done there. So maybe if he sat down and he had some fellowship with the savior of the universe, sufficiently, not efficiently, whatever, I'm trying to use, Calvinist trips. Anyway, you know what I'm trying to say. If he sat down with Jesus, then maybe there

would be some change of behavior and change of heart there. You just never know. You never know. So maybe some people today that need to know Jesus who have significant influence. Okay. The next question is, can you talk about that church that doubles as a brewery that's not really a Q&A question, but it needs to be discussed at length. Okay, so well, I'll discuss it a little bit. Maybe I'll do an entire podcast on that at some point. So I don't know if you guys saw that there's like this viral video going around from now this who is stupid social media platform, but they share these videos. And there is this so-called church that is in a brewery, serves beer before church. I think it's in Colorado. And that would maybe be cool if that was

it maybe, but it also is, you know, affirming of everything and that they said that Jesus was killed by white supremacists. And the reason why he came was to, you know, defeat the patriarchy and defeat white supremacy. That really just makes me want to throw up if that is your tiny view of Jesus, that he fits into your little political ideology. So stupid. And of course, it's affirming of all different kinds of sin. So, I mean, the first problem, obviously, is that it's in a brewery. I do not believe that alcohol is a sin. I drink alcohol myself.

But the Bible clearly says that we should not be eating meat or doing anything if it possibly tempts someone who is struggling with that. So if I, for example, if I had a friend who was trying not to drink alcohol, maybe their dad was an alcoholic or they just feel like, you know what, alcohol is not something that I want to do in my life. It really makes me struggle. I feel like a worst person when I drink alcohol or, you know, someone who can't drink just one beer. They feel like they have to get drunk every time. I'm not going to drink in front of that person because it puts them in a really difficult situation. And the Bible is very clear that the loving thing to do in that

situation would be to, say, you know what, I'm going to abstain as well. The Bible uses the example of eating meat if someone feels like eating meat that is actually dedicated to idols is a sin, then and you feel like it's holy, well, just don't eat meat because that's the loving thing to do. Why would you put your brother or sister in that situation? So that's problem number one is it's in a brewery. You could be possibly putting into temptation someone who is struggling with alcoholism or who doesn't feel like alcohol is holy. So that's not inclusive.

You're automatically shutting certain people away. Obviously, the other part is that Jesus didn't come to shatter the patriarchy or white supremacy. If you want to hear my really, really scandalous take, God actually condones and built the patriarchy. So I won't even get into that right now. And also, he wasn't killed by white supremacists. It was both Romans and Jews that advocated for his murder. and I don't think that it had anything to do with race whatsoever. It had to do with the fact that he said that he was a king of the Jews.

And they didn't like that. And because the Pharisees thought that he was a blasphemer. So that's how I think of that. It's not a church. It's not a church. It's a gathering that, again, people use as a shroud of righteousness over their selfishness. It is the, to wrap this whole thing up, perpetuating the gospel of self-fulfillment.

I'm sure these people are very likable. They have a message that tickles the years of the people that walk in. They think, oh, great, I can have fire insurance against hell, still go to heaven, and do all of the things that I want to do. There's really no such thing as sin. Yeah, super convenient. I think that would be a very comfortable way to be a Christian, but it's also a damning one. If you want to know my real thoughts on that.

Okay, those are all wonderful questions. I hope that this was, um, interesting for you. If you have any pushback for me, I know this is kind of like a touchy subject or any questions for me. Please feel free to email me, Allie at the conservative millennial blog.com. I try to respond. But I always, I read the emails and I try to take everything that you say critical or positive seriously. So thank you so much for listening. I hope you guys have a great weekend.