Review Revue - BONUS FRIDAY: Car Decals
Episode Date: May 21, 2021Reilly and Geoff read reviews about Car Decals and discuss tricked-out tractors and beasts of the woods!Follow Reilly and Geoff:IG: @reillyanspaugh & @geoffreyjamesTwitter:... @reilecoyote & @GeoffBoyardeeAdvertise on Review Revue via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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This is a HeadGum Original.
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Is Paul McCartney fine if we steal
From a song that's so proud and real
I don't wanna be sad
I just wanna be
i love that one honestly the past couple theme songs i'm like these are so great
it is bonkers to me in the best way that, like, our theme song is just Variations on Foyou by Paul McCartney.
And I was thinking, like, man, I hope this doesn't get us in trouble.
And then this theme song came on, and it's just perfect.
Yeah, it's awesome.
It won't get us in trouble.
Who's if Tom?
That was from Victor.
So shout out, Victor.
And he wants us to plug his band,e and the anchor at joe and the anchor
on instagram so check that out oh thank you back at it again on a bonus friday bonus friday we're
talking things that have to do with cars things that have to do with vehicles things that have
to do with roadster things. Roadster things.
I'm driving to the market.
I'm a roadster thing.
I'm a roadster thing.
I'm gonna roadster sing a song in my car.
Things to do with cars. It's you driving down the wrong side of the highway.
Roadster things.
Roadster things roadster jeff what are we talking about today on this bonus friday let's just cut to the
fucking chase let's go to the fucking chase actually we're talking car decals riley and
now car decals are different from bumper stickers kind of and i do feel we need to make this
distinction so this is basically anything that any sticker that wouldn't go on your bumper bumper stickers, kind of. And I do feel we need to make this distinction.
So this is basically anything that,
any sticker that wouldn't go on your bumper.
When I looked up car decals,
I just found, like, I found Sticker Meal,
which is the website that I found all my reviews for bumper stickers. Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.
And so for me, I'm like, okay,
I'm going to look through all these things really quick.
I just, these aren't ones that I'm doing reviews for but I thought
they're decals but they're basically bumper
stickers they are so fucking funny
to me that I just want to read them really quick
yeah there's
there's I found
three that really got me
there's one that's in the kind of
Disney font with like
stars and it says powered
by bitch dust.
That's unhinged.
Then we have one that's,
and it's kind of like in the choogy kind of like font
of like the kind of like thick cursive.
Yeah.
It says, I run on caffeine, chaos, and cuss words.
Nice. Cuss words and cuss words. Nice.
Cuss words.
Cuss words.
And the last one is in like pink and black.
If you're gonna ride my ass, at least pull my hair.
Nice.
So decals, I guess, are different than bumper stickers
in that they feel different.
Like they're a different material.
You can put them on kind of anywhere.
Bigger.
Sometimes.
They're oftentimes bigger, yeah.
I would often say they're bigger.
For me, I'm like, okay, I'm going to try and do something that isn't a phrase.
Because for me, that reads bumper sticker.
But instead, what's a decal sticker that I can put on somewhere that isn't the bumper?
Sure.
That's more of like a decor or, you know, an illustration rather than a phrase.
That was my interpretation of the assignment.
Jeffrey?
My interpretation was, yeah, anything that wouldn't be on the bumper and bigger.
Oh, God.
Kind of bigger than a bumper stick.
Because most bumper stickers are circular or rectangular.
And then the decals are often wild and spa.
I mean, they're all different shapes and sizes.
This is obviously pandemonium.
What's that?
They're wild in that they're not circular or rectangular.
They can't be contained, these decals.
I don't know how else to describe them to you.
Then they're all over the fucking mat.
Got it.
Do you wanna start?
Cause I started us off.
Let's start us off.
Five stars for Mario.
What's his last name?
And Luigi.
It's all one word.
Mario and Luigi.
Five stars.
Oh, this is of the four pack of flame decals,
simulation red, yellow flames.
So like you'd imagine
flame like flame stickers on a car
five stars
they're easy to apply and of nice
quality they added a nice
touch to my Troy
to my Troy
built riding
mower
so it's a red tractor and again this will be on the instagram
and it's just two tiny flames on the front yeah no three there's three oh yeah three also the
title of the review is nice nice look i just imagine somebody working on his track like he
puts way too much time and effort into his tractor. And he's just, his wife is just actively cheating on him.
Hey, Bill.
Hey, neighbor.
Long time no see.
Oh, hey, Alan.
Good to see you, man.
Did you see my tractor?
Oh, wow.
Look at that.
Yeah, look, I put these flame decals on
and it's kind of awesome.
It's a nice look, right?
Yeah, totally.
So that's all you wanted to talk about today? Yeah. No, I've been checking out the Troy. Yeah. So basically I got
these spinners on the wheels. Check this out. So I hit it there and then it just kind of spins
around the wheels like that. That's amazing. The whole time, like I'm just kind of like in a robe
on my lawn. Yeah, that's incredible. Oh, that's so, you know what? I might head in.
I'm sorry, I'm just getting a little chilly out here.
I'm sorry, did you just say hydraulic brakes?
Oh, do you have those?
I don't.
Okay.
I'm in the market though.
Woman appears in the doorframe of the neighbor's house
being like, come back to bed.
Did you see the exhaust?
The exhaust is loud.
Check this out.
I turn it on, it's like not that loud.
Woo, listen to that fucker purr.
Hey man, I'm so, referring to your wife.
I'm so sorry about this.
I feel terrible.
The brand is Troy, so I kind of feel like a Trojan.
I kind of feel like I'm mowing the grass,
going to Troy in the horse. going to Troy and the horse.
Going to Troy and the horse.
Listen, man, we can sit down and talk about this sometime.
And I really would not like to do that because if we do, then it's going to be an outpour of emotion.
It's deeper than just a physical connection.
I think I'm in love.
I don't want to hear any of this.
We're in love.
I can't hear that you're in love because if it was just sex, I made peace with that.
And that way that I know that like she's getting her fill with you, like literally and physically.
And then she comes home to me and she still loves me this is why this is why because
you never want to talk about any no come on don't you don't have to get in on him like this he's
just he's dealing with a lot new coat of paint thanks for noticing it it's hard because I don't
even talk to her about things anymore because she's so more often at your place she is I will
that's actually what I wanted to talk to you about.
She was-
Dual blade technology.
I'm coming by this afternoon to get my suitcases, okay?
I'm moving it.
Yeah.
Fuck, dude.
I'm so sorry that you have to hear about it this way.
And, you know, we've been neighbors for,
for God, for what?
10 years?
10 years.
Yeah.
10 blades.
10 years, 10 blades on the cutting technology.
So it actually gets an even grass height.
Can you just like, can you drop the tractor for a second?
I can't drop the tractor for a second.
It's all I have at this point.
I don't want to hear about how happy you are with Sharon.
I don't want to hear about how great it's going,
how she's grabbing her suitcase, right?
I got the Troy.
It is the 2019 model.
And it is cherry red with flame accents.
Anything else?
Can we, we can still hang out, right?
We can still be friends, you know, watch, watch Jeopardy together on Sundays.
We have fun doing that. We can still do friends, you know, watch Jeopardy together on Sundays. We have fun doing that.
We can still do that, right?
That's all I want is just like, I just hope we can still be friends at the end of the day.
That's a lot to ask.
You said, is there anything else?
You said, I don't have anything.
And I want to let you know that despite how it may seem, like, we can still be friends.
But if you don't want that, I totally, God, I'm a piece of shit.
I shouldn't have said anything. I'll God, I'm a piece of shit. I shouldn't have said anything.
I'll just...
You are a piece of shit.
But only because you didn't notice the filtering machine in the engine of the Troy.
I can't live with myself until you admit that I'm a bad person for fucking your wife and for us starting a life together.
And I can't live with myself until i
get the premium perforated leather seat on the troy i grab your wrist punch me just punch me
in the face god damn it i need i need to feel your rage i haven't slept in weeks i'm holding a key
you're holding one of my arms i'm holding a key in the other drive it i can't sleep i haven't slept
for weeks until you see
and someone else feels how good the Troy is.
I put the key up to my throat.
Just fucking do it, man.
I put your hand on the steering wheel.
Just fucking do it, man.
We pause, look at each other,
start making out ferociously.
The wife is jealous.
She runs over, takes the keys,
gets on the tractor,
crashes it into the side of the house.
Troy!
The other neighbors are like, Hey!
Homeowners Association meeting tonight at four.
Be there.
There are children in the neighborhood.
It's a Sunday morning.
All right.
We take a quick break.
Yeah.
Marty.
For over 100 years, Trico has been the leader in innovation and ingenuity for everything wiper blades.
Trico was the first to mass produce wiper blades, and they have received numerous awards from vehicle manufacturers who trust Trico to put the best product on their vehicles.
Jeffrey, one of their products, Trico Neoform is designed to match your vehicle's exact connection.
That means no more guessing, no more hassle and no more confusing while installing your wiper blades.
Not only are they easy to install and spot, but they're high quality beam
blades built to beat any type of weather. Trico Ultra Wiper Blades are American-made premium beam
wiper blades that shine in any weather. These wiper blades also feature a unique design that
converts wind force into extra pressure, allowing for maximum windshield contact. The Trico Smart
Set Wiper Blades automatically pairs the correct size and fit wiper blades specific to your Thank you. for cold snowy areas and Trico smarts that storm for everything else in between. These wiper blades
can be found online
at wipers123.com.
So use the promo code
REVIEW
R-E-V-I-E-W
at checkout
to receive $10
off your next order
of $40 or more.
Thanks Trico.
And we're back.
This is a review for
key fourth fourth win And we're back. This is a review for Key Fourth Win Claw Marks Decal Reflective Sticker Waterproof Headlight Decal Vinyl Sticker Decal for Sports Cars.
All right.
I'll just show you the...
Let's see it.
This is what the ad for it...
God.
So they're claw marks
they're two sets of claw marks that
a lot of people are putting over the
headlights of their car
why is that good to have
what message
are you trying to send this is a
one star review from an Amazon customer
so you get to pick an AC name
I get to pick an AC name. I get to pick an AC name?
Mm-hmm.
Let's go Aaron Carter.
Okay, Aaron Carter, one star.
The title is not what the main picture shows.
Very disappointed in the phony picture of the BMW
with left and right side decal.
It only comes with both decals the same,
so if you apply, I did not.
Use tape first to see if you like the look.
I expected the trailing claw marks to both go out away from the center like the BMW picture shows.
But they both slant the same way.
Not realistic and looks dumb.
Sent them back.
Not realistic.
What are you trying to get people to think?
Also, these come in like a million
different colors you can get like neon green
you can get yellow blue it's like
what are you expecting to look
realistic about
what yeah what do you want people to think
you just drove from it's like
you get them it's like oh it doesn't
look I want it to look cool like it doesn't have the
look but it's like you don't get these you don't get a flame decal for people to think that
your car's on fucking fire you don't get like one of like baby yoda popping out of the back
you're not expecting people to be like holy shit is that baby is real yeah i'm starstruck. Like the amount of decals that it's like, people won't buy this.
I can't show up to work with this.
They're not going to think it's real for a second.
Guy pulls up to work.
He's all disheveled.
Reeves, Reeves, you got to help me.
Whoa, Paul, look at those sick decals on your car, man.
No, no, no, man.
No, no, they're not decals, man.
Oh, my God.
There's an absolute beast.
Yes, this new Mustang, it is a beast, brother.
I'm so happy this worked out with your Christmas bonus this year.
It looks awesome.
I just drove through the woods, and there is an indescribable monster on the loose.
I can tell.
Look at that.
The scratch marks go all the way down your car.
Hey, Dave, come look at this.
Holy shit.
Oh, my God.
Those are the new decals.
Oh, Dave.
I hate Dave.
Those look amazing.
Can you send me the link for that shit?
I got to put that on my car.
The wife will love it.
Yeah, man.
I got to grab the collar.
The only link is go into those them woods, and you'll see the beast.
You'll see the beast right quick.
What?
Dude.
I know it was weird, but, like, it's not about the word choice.
It's about the fact that there's a beast in there.
It's not the fucking point.
I could have lost my life.
Yo, you are really, I love this new you, man.
You got, like, a beast car.
You got these beast stickers.
This is, you know, I know that divorce was hard for you, and so I'm really glad to see that like you are just coming out you know what you're embracing you're a
fucking man pat you on the back there's blood on the back of my hand you are in character my guy
are you kidding me you give me a bro hug there's blood on my back and you still think it's a bit it's a facade because i
went through a divorce the divorce was five years ago i'm over it obviously i'm so glad that you're
over the divorce man i mean like it's so now i feel like i'm comfortable telling you that shelly
was at the dive bar in town last week and i saw her macking on a ton of guys no dave come on we
don't wait maybe he's not ready for that yet.
Who was it?
There's a rustling in the bushes close by.
I'm just, because it was it.
Well, it doesn't matter, you know.
It was Eli.
It was Eli and Will.
Eli, really?
Because she always told me not to worry about Eli, actually.
Oh, well, hey, you don't need to worry anymore.
Not since the divorce.
As he's saying divorce, something like shoots out of the bushes,
pulls him into the bushes.
Everyone's like, oh, I can't.
I'm just hurt, honestly, because she always she worked really closely with Eli.
And like of anyone for her to like move on with, that hurts to hear.
You're crazy, man.
You're fucking crazy.
Where did Dave go?
Come on.
Where did he go? What did you do? What did you where'd dave go come on where'd he go what did you do
what did you do the beast got him this shouldn't be your reaction by the way i'm stunned because
i'm still dealing with this information about eli dave just got brought in by the beast you saw the
beast it's insane that you're so casual about this you hired something you are really going into this
beast thing i love love Asu.
This is how you deal with fear?
Something pulls him back into the woods too.
You're on your phone.
You're looking at like Eli's Facebook profile.
Like still.
I have to re-download Facebook for it.
What am I doing?
I shouldn't.
I have to know.
The rustling in the bushes grows louder.
Well, he looks cut.
He does look. He's in good good shape i'll give him that stuff like a giant like fucking werewolf big foot fucking king caught like an amalgamation of everything comes out and it's like standing
over you like breathing so heavily out that it's like your hair is blowing back in the
wind what does he have that i don't have straight teeth maybe but i got the end of the car with like
two fingers i throw it into the woods his last name is shangles like that's not an attractive name i just she can't be in bed being like oh
eli i opened my ma and a big thing of drool is just like falling onto your head like soaking you
oh you know what he wakes us that is pretty cool it must have been what they talked about
i reach into the building i grabbed like five people in my hand, like popcorn, and I toss them into my mouth.
Beast, who's more attractive, Eli or me?
I pick you up by like the scruff of your neck, and I turn you so that I can see your phone.
I look at you.
I look down at the phone.
I just, I kind of like nod to him.
Damn it.
I put you in my mouth.
Should we do our last segment?
Oh, yes.
This should be on the phone. I downloaded it on my phone a couple nights ago because the other night I see Daniel on his phone
and he's playing a game and Daniel Rashid is not one to like have an iPhone game like Daniel really
like he's the kind of person who sets like time limits on his apps and actually follows them I
used to do that but then I just kept doing like 15 more minutes to the point where I'm just like, there, this is futile.
And so to see Daniel playing an iPhone game, I'm like, now that's interesting. And so I'm like,
what is that? And he's like, I saw an ad for it on Instagram and it looked really fun. And it's
called physics balls. And it's, it's just a game where it's like you have i don't know how to describe it but
it's like you you shoot balls down you're trying to like hit all these different um shapes and in
the shapes there are numbers and you have to hit if the number is like 352 you have to hit that
box that amount of times for it to go away and if the boxes keep building up then you're done
um and you're sort of fucked more you're sort of fucked so anyway i'm like that looks kind of
silly then i watch him play a little bit longer i'm like oh that looks fun as fuck then i download
it then elizabeth downloads it now it's all we can do like it takes it so now it's like at first daniel had the high score and then i just beat
that score by a lot like daniel had the high score of like 70 000 and i got like 109 000 last night
jesus which took which takes like an hour to do yeah and so so now it's like we can't stop because we're all very competitive.
And so it's like we have to come out on top.
But it takes so much time.
It's like to the point where last night as I was falling asleep, I closed my eyes.
I could see the game happening in my head.
We are all so addicted.
I'm like, Daniel, what is it about this game and
he's like it's a fucking drug and we're all deep in it um so and and and i know that
i have shit to get done like last night i'm like i gotta start working on my snl tape for this year
and then next thing you know i'm like huh i've been playing this game for 45 minutes like
snl is it's a crapshoot but it's also a would be a dream come true it's so and instead you're
playing physics balls is it hold on is it balls or ball anyway um i realize i'm like we're gonna have to delete it it's physics balls we're gonna have to
delete it at some point because it will take over my life and i'm like maybe that's so funny i'm
like maybe i should like delete it until i submit my tape and then it'll be my reward and daniel's
like no you can still keep it maybe it's like with each character you finish no you have to
no no no with you because you're like me you have to delete it until you get the tapes on
no no physics balls um so honestly i have seen a lot of instagram ads for games and i'm like
that looks fun that looks fun that's fun um yeah, that's what physics balls is really shaking me.
I started rewatching 30 Rock and there's a joke.
Well, I remember on my first watch of 30 Rock,
I thought everything that Tracy Morgan said was really annoying and not funny.
But on this second rewatch, it's been almost the opposite.
I think that a lot of his lines are like very funny
and I just didn't get them growing up. And like the jack donaghy is just an amazing character and obviously it's a
great show but just i don't know it has a tremendous rewatch value it's also like a lot of
cancelable shit like a lot of things where i'm like the a story most of the a stories in the
first couple seasons that i've watched are just not funny and offensive like there's one where
fred armisen who's not middle eastern i don't think plays a middle eastern guy and tina fey that I've watched are just not funny and offensive. Like there's one where Fred Armisen,
who's not Middle Eastern, I don't think,
plays a Middle Eastern guy
and Tina Fey thinks that he's a terrorist
and he's just trying to audition.
Like the gag is that at the end,
like he's doing all the suspicious things,
but then at the end, it's a twist
that he was just trying to audition for Amazing Race.
But I'm like, that's not that funny.
But everything Jack Donaghy says and everything Tracy Morgan says
is so funny and there's one
where Tracy talks about his
Christmas album
and the song is
Imagine Christmas wishes
Shooting out of your eyes
A candy cake full of snow dreams
So fucking bad.
Shooting out of your eyes.
Yeah.
That and we officially signed a lease on a new HeadGum office.
So we'll hopefully this time next and maybe four weeks we might be recording out of there.
And I cannot wait just for purely a technical standpoint to not have to do this over
zoom yeah to not have to worry about do we stop speeding and to not have to worry about i have to
like queue up this make sure it's going through loop back so that we can both hear it like i'm so
happy that pretty soon we'll just be able to press one thing on the zoom and that's that yeah along
with just the joys of recording in person.
It's going to be nice.
Well, thanks so much for listening to this bonus Friday episode of our show.
We'll see you guys again on Tuesday with another episode of...
It's Review Review.
Let's change the title.
No.
Let's do Stars.
No, just say Arrivedera.
No, I don't think so. Let's do... What did you just say Arriba Dare. No, I don't think so.
Let's do, what'd you think about that?
The podcast.
The show.
The podcast should cheat.
That was a Hiddem Original.