Review Revue - BONUS FRIDAY: Spirit Halloweens

Episode Date: October 30, 2020

In this special BONUS Halloween episode, Reilly and Geoff read reviews about Spirit Halloween stores and discuss costume anxiety, vehicular manslaughter, and ass-companies!Follow Reilly and Geoff:IG: @reillyanspaugh & @iamgeoffreyjamesTwitter: @reilecoyote & @dontplaynojamesAdvertise on Review Revue via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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I just want to know how you feel. I want a love that's so proud and real. You make me wanna go out and steal. I just wanna have you. I just wanna have you. It's spoopy season and I just wanna It's spoopy season and I just spooked myself because I'm the reason for this season because my voice is scary good.

Boo! Trick or treat. Give me something good to eat. I'm hungry and all I've had to eat is candy for the past five weeks. Five weeks. So you started in not only mid-September and that's why you're hungry because all you're eating is sugar. Yeah. candy for the past five weeks. Five weeks. So you started in not only mid-September, and that's why you're hungry,

because all you're eating is sugar. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. What's new with you? Um, hmm. It's funny. It's not funny.

No, it's just interesting. No, I'm just interesting. Can you monologue for a second? I'm going to go get a coffee. Are you kidding me? Are you actually shitting me? We have had, okay, listeners, come on, settle in, settle in. Little Al Pacino, Gal Pacino is going to tell you a tale.

We just sat down. We've been chatting for a bit before we started recording. And Jeff actually asked, he's like, instead of recording at 11, can we do 1115? We're getting time to set up, get ready. And he goes, I'm fully ready. We had maybe about five to 10 minutes of talking before recording started. And now he's getting a coffee. Of course he's getting a coffee. But we're here now.

And that's fine. Yeah. You know what the issue is? I have Slack open. I'm so scatterbrained right now. I have Slack open. Jake is texting me about other stuff. I have Zoom open, which is obviously about other stuff i have zoom open which is

obviously an issue not an issue we're recording an episode what's that i said it's not an issue because this is what the priority is right now because we're recording an episode do you mind if i actually throw a couple one-liners at you i'm putting daylor stand upset and i wanted to get your thoughts no that's not the time for this that's not the time for this who's there hey it's the funds not a one-liner if i have to respond to you not a one-liner it's a three-liner it's abc look i'm i'll admit you know that halloween's my favorite holiday i know which is why i can't believe you're not as excited to record this episode i've been dealing with uh an issue it's an issue of epic proportions. My Instagram account was not hacked, but I think they finally realized that I am a hack and I lost it.

It'd be more exciting if it was hacked. It would mean that I'm worth a damn if it was hacked. Yeah. But yeah, no, it was disabled for no reason. I have never violated the terms of service. I don't post anything abusive, hateful or nude. You talk about your wagon a lot. That's a euphemism. That's not bad. It's not a slur. You're also allowed, there's free speech. There's just not hate speech.

No, I know. But like you talking about the wagon is kind of hate speech to some people. To who? To me. Because my ass is fatter than yours? Oh my God. This morning I was on the phone with Jeff and I'm like, dude, your Instagram. And he's like, yeah. The reason they gave is they said that like my account, I was impersonating someone else.

Well, I think they realized that I'm not secure. You know what I mean? Like they realized that I wish I was someone better in a way. Right. You wish that you weren't you. Yeah. If I could step out of my skin for a second, which is obviously why I love Halloween. It's like, what if I was just going to say that's Halloween?

What if I was a musician? What if I was like a chill, like with the hair and like, you know, with the skills with the hair? Like I could put together my own record during quarantine. But instead, what am I doing? I'm downing protein shakes in an effort to like myself more. Jeff, there is a night a year where you can be whoever you want. Really? Yeah, and that's all

Hallows Eve! Jeffrey, what are you being for Halloween tomorrow? I'm being Panic at the Disco. Are you actually? I thought you were going to be a skeleton who went to Princeton. Yeah, I thought that was dumb. I got a disco outfit. It's like a disco shirt with the pants and the platform shoes.

And then I'm going to wear a mask. So it's Panic at the Disco. Oh, that's very good. Yeah. Oh, that's very good. Well, I was really excited about posting a photo of just me in my backyard on Instagram with the caption Panic at the Dis disco so that people got it yeah and now i can't because i don't have a fucking instagram man right oh my god that's right because no parties no trick-or-treating obviously covid so really every we're all getting dressed up to share photos

of what everyone would have seen um yeah when did yeah. When Daniel, when Daniel and I were brainstorming costume ideas, he was just like, listen, he's like, I don't care what we are because at the end of the day, this is for your Instagram. Jesus. Pretty brutal. No, it wasn't brutal

because he actually loves the costume that he picked. No, that's like bullying. It's not. It's not bullying. I know. Thank you for asking. Daniel and i are going to be the musical chicago um i am roxy heart and daniel will be the city of chicago um so you've already told me otherwise my reaction would be better no i know i'm telling

i'm telling the listeners so basically it's me in a full Roxy Hart flapper outfit doing the whole thing got a wig and everything and Daniel in a Cubs shirt and hat holding a bean just the one is it a coffee bean or you haven't decided yet um we also may order deep dish on the night damn that'd be fun well you should do the one where they ship it to you. Oh, that's going to take far too long. If you order it today, it'll probably get there. Maybe. But anyway, but that's not what we're,

we're not talking about deep dish. You brought it up. We're not talking about Chicago. You brought it up. We're talking about, no, but it's like at the end of the day, what do we talk about every day, all the day? What are we always thinking about all the day, all the live long day, all the time?

Spirit Halloween stores. We never talk about it. That's what we're all thinking about. It's what we the live long day, all the time. Spirit Halloween stores. We never talk about it. That's what we're all thinking about. It's what we all wish we were talking about. What are your experiences with Spirit Halloweens? I think it's a very divisive store. I've never been to a Spirit Halloween. You've never been to a Spirit Halloween?

No. And here's why. Because we'll be good. Kylie. Jeff dies. I'm some weird combination right now of hyper and tired. it's like you've been staying up too late you know what i mean yeah yeah oh i brought up the instagram thing not to complain about my instagram but to say that i was up late last night reading about ways to get it back and then i woke

up today in like a cold sweat at 8 30 which is way earlier than i normally go to bed or wake up and so i'm just very tired and I'm distraught and scared, but go on. You haven't been to spirit Halloween. So I haven't been to spirit Halloween because, um, growing up in LA, like there weren't the stores that I would go to.

Have you ever heard of Oz? A H H S. Or I think it's like a H H S or something like that. So it's basically, it's the same kind of thing. It's like they have costumes, they have that. So it's basically, it's the same kind of thing. It's like they have costumes, they have gag gifts. It's a similar kind of store. They might be going out of business.

You're round? I don't know. You're round or is it a pop-up? You're round. Okay. You're round. Okay. And okay.

This might shock everyone a little bit, just like knowing me and kind of who I am, who I present to be. And I know, Jeffff this is gonna like blow your mind a little bit something you don't know really i'm a scared person i'm a nervous anxious person yeah and um i have a couple of rational fears but a one fear it's like i get scared of halloween decorations very easily because they look so fake. Like I'm not scared that it's like, oh, that looks really, really, that's gonna get me.

There's something about how fake they look that's really off-putting to me. Like Uncanny Valley? I don't know. It's like animation that looks too lifelike. It's like the weird feeling you get when you watch Polar Express. No, I'm down with that.

But it's like, if i'm in a store like i remember going to the store with my dad and my dad like because part of me was curious about it but also very scared and so it's like there was parts of the store that was just costumes but then you go into the other part that's like the decorations the the animatronics that like you pass by in the motion sensor and it jumps out at you yeah and that because it's also packed it's all packed together so it's like non-stop it's just like endless rows and rows of all that being packed really closely together and it scared me so much i don't think i understand the fear though like what's the fear of it just it's very unsettling it's not like they're gonna get me i just it really creeps me out i really don't like them i love halloween i love dressing up

it's very very fun it's just those so i'd be one to i would rather order my costume like online and send it back if it didn't fit because there's something about going to the stores like i don't like the smell of it and every halloween store smells the same. It's like plastic. Yeah, it just smells like plastic and fake hair and fur. And it's very overwhelming to me and I don't

it's scary. I'm a little nervous little fuck honestly. Yeah, we were walking in downtown LA once by the old Hedgum office and we almost got mugged and you stood up for me. You beat the shit out of the guy. You weren't scared at all. But then you walk into a Spirit Halloween

and you start crying. Yeah, and I mean, that's about being a complicated woman. That's on being layered and complex. That's on being layered. And that's on layers, honey. That's on being layered Hamilton. What about you, halloween um i never thought we'd have a layered hamilton reference on this show i love halloween stores

i love spirit halloween i love how shitty it is it's like you know the spirit halloween's a pop-up yeah yeah it's like a yearly pop-up they take take the place of like, you know, big box stores that are either empty or whatever, like just corners of other stores. It's very, it's such a strange business model, but I'm sure they make so much money. I think I always loved going to Spirit Halloween or whatever the Halloween store was, Party City, et cetera, when I was young, picking out my costume because, you know, otherwise you'd have to order from the catalog. I loved a catalog. I liked looking through the catalog and then going to Party City or Spirit Halloween and finding the one, the SKU, the unit number, the ID, the costume for me. I was a Mortal Kombat fighter and I'd never played the game. Are you serious?

I was just about to ask what were some highlights of costumes that you got from there that's true i ended up playing the game but it was rated m and i was like eight so my mom didn't let me for probably good reasons uh but yeah it was great the smell is horrible she's like there's no point in him playing he'll never get good himself he'll never make money off of it yeah to me it's not halloween if you don't go to a party city or a spirit halloween and i've always said that your literal mantra it's not Halloween if you don't go to a Party City or a Spirit Halloween. And I've always said that. Your literal mantra. It's not Halloween if you don't go to a Party City or a Spirit Halloween. I say that in February.

You say that on Valentine's Day. That's your card to your lover. Absolutely. She gives you a card and she's like, Jeff, our time together is so special. You make every day feel like Valentine's Day. Let me stop you right there. I know exactly what you're going to say. Let's say it at the same time. Let's say it at the same time.

Three, two, one. It's not Halloween if you don't go to a Spirit City. You make every day feel like i know exactly what you're gonna say can we let's say it at the same time let's say at the same time three two one it's not halloween if you don't make every day feel like valentine's day so i break up with you i break up with you um should we take a break and then get into it let's take a break and then get into it let's take a break jeffrey we're back that was so good i'm like really like i'm i'm like killing it today not really in terms of of like the music really. It was sharp. It was sharp and then like you are like a good singer or whatever. Read your review. Read your review. Are you kidding me? Read your review about

Spirit. Okay. Jeffrey. Okay this is one star from Dave A. Anne of Green Gables. Dave Anne of Green Gables for Spirit Halloween in where is this?

Dublin, California. I don't know where that is. I don't either. I didn't know that existed. I would give them zero stars if I could. Everybody always says that. Our street is clearly marked for more than 1.2 miles.

No trucks, dead end, no turnaround, and one lane road. Why a driver of Spirit Halloweens would come up our street at 10 p.m. on Monday, October 1st, proceed to trespass and back into my chained driveway, break the chain, and drive off without an apology or anything. Blows my mind. Boycott their stores. All caught on my cameras. Tried calling them to chat, but just got the runaround from them. And then there's like their cameras and their yard like footage and it's a spirit halloween

branded truck breaking through their gate just to turn around and it's so clearly a back like country road what are you talking about i feel so bad for them but i love that it's like i love that it's not like this unmarked car like it is clearly it's such a funny visual we'll put it on the instagram that's so good it's like they're like it's halloween it's october 1st, it's Halloween. It's October 1st. It's Halloween fuckers. It's a guy living alone in his little like house. Sorry. Sorry about that.

Hey, happy Halloween, right? It's October 1st. You just broke my gate. I'm sorry. I didn't see the gate. And then when I did, I kept going. The gate has five chains on it, padlocked, a big sign that says no trespassing. Well, my truck says Spirit Halloween in big letters.

I can see. Okay, great. Okay, well then, you know what? I'm going to need to call your supervisor at Spirit Halloween. Please don't do that. I'll do anything. Okay, will you paylloween please don't do that i'll do anything okay will you pay for my driveway to get fixed i'll do almost anything okay give me the number please the number oh the number yes eight one eight hundred five five five you know i'm

just gonna look up spirit halloween no then there might be a number and then i'm worried here's the number all right you know what what's your name what's your name my name is what's your name my name is doug what's your name doug it's not doug all right let me look at the back and it says your driver number okay you know i don't know why would i believe you because i'm doug doug the Doug? That number is wrong. You're not. I'm Doug. I don't know. I'm Doug. Two. Doug two. I'm also Doug

two. Listen, I'm Colleen's number. You can stay here. You can leave. I have the plate. I have your number. Your driver's number. Okay, so. Alright, I'll just take a couple deep breaths then. Ah! Ah! your driver's number, okay? Alright, I'll just take a couple deep breaths. Could you not do it right in my ear, please? Sorry.

Hello? Yeah, Spirit Halloween. Hello, hi. I'm so sorry to... No, actually, I'm not sorry. I don't know why I'm apologizing. My wife tells me I need to stop apologizing more. What's the issue?

Hi, one of your drivers for your store I'm apologizing. My wife tells me I need to stop apologizing more. What's the issue? Hi. One of your drivers for your store just fully backed into my driveway and broke my chains and my gate. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry about that. I'm so sorry about that. You know what? Thank you.

Did you get his name? Well, I have the number. I have his kind of driver's number um that he has on the back of the truck um and it is h28527 okay um i actually i asked for his name and he just he asked me for my name i gave him my name and he said that's also my name and i don't think that's true oh you know what this is yeah this is doug too sorry this is sorry is, sorry, this is our worst driver. His name is Doug too. His name is, is it like Roman numeral? His name is also Doug too.

Is it the number? Is it Roman numeral? Oh, you know what? Can I put you on a brief hold? Oh my God. Yeah. It's kind of nice. What did they say?

Well, I'm sorry. I didn't believe you. Doug too. Is that a family name? 2 is, yeah. That's my last name. 2 is? Your last name is 2?

My name is also Doug 2, and I go by my middle name, Doug. Because also 2 is an insane name, obviously. All right. Well, listen, man. You don't have to stay long. I'm just going to be on hold and making sure that I, maybe not out of your pocket, but that Spirit pays for this. I'm afraid I can't let you get any money from Spirit.

Because Spirit is like, it's what fuels my Spirit. I've been working at Spirit for 12 years. And you're how old? Me? Yeah. I'm 30. You look like you're maybe 24. Oh, well, you look great for your age. Thank you.

I have a really, really, really, really long skincare routine. Oh, God. I don't want to ask what you do and how long it is. Creams, scrubs, lathering it all into my eyes. Into your eyes. I have sunken eyes, so I have to rub them on my eyelids. I can see that. Okay.

Excuse me, are you there? Are you still there? Hello, yes. so i have to rub them on my eyelids okay excuse me are you there are you still there hello yes um i i i basically just wanted to call and and ask if if you would pay for my the damages yes of course no how much do you think the damages are just i would say about um eight hundred fifty dollars okay we'll do what you want to round it up to a clean ten thousand yeah that sounds amazing if you could if you could give me ten thousand dollars to pay for my driveway that'd be incredible i i cannot do that i cannot do that i have to forward it to

my supervisor but from spirit yeah that's totally fine oh my god thank you so much that'd be amazing it might actually be closer to the 850 it'll be anywhere from 850 to ten thousand dollars that's fine i mean the most i mean like 850 will cover it so as long as it's between that range that works for me the likelihood of it being 850 is very slim. The likelihood of it being 10,000 is much higher. That's incredible. We have so much money. You ask us in October, we're swimming in it.

If you had asked us in July if we could do this, we would not be able to afford it. It's because of Halloween. It's because of the season. Oh, yeah. No, I never thought about it like that. I thought it was just kind of Q3 was huge for us. Well, I mean, obviously, it's because you're a Halloween pop-up. What's he saying?

What's he saying? He's saying, Doug, too, you really are so close to my ear. I can feel the heat of your breath. Sorry, sorry, sorry. It's okay. He's saying that he'll give me money. He'll give me actually even more money than I need. Oh, that's amazing.

Yeah. So thank you so much. Everyone can, we can all disperse, you know. Thank you again. Well, I need to get some information. It's not going to be easy. Oh, of course. Sorry.

It's not going to be easy? It's going to be slow, but it's going to be easy and painful. How much, what's your name? My name is Doug Jones. Doug Jones. And it's not, it's not, it's not Doug One. It's obviously not Doug One, just because his name is Doug 2 does not make me Doug 1. Yeah, I think that's what got me all turned around.

Sorry. So it's Doug Jones. Should we mail this to you? Do you want... We could give it to Doug 2. He could kind of come pick it up and drop it off later today. You know what? Would love for Doug 2 to not be handling $10,000.

Yeah. You just said he's your worst driver. Can I level with you? Sure. We have the most important election in our nation's history coming up in eight days right so i know i just feel like i mean i voted early okay but not everybody has a some people are absentee you have obviously military service members who need to mail in their ballots so for you to use the usps for

this kind of thing just feels a little bit ghost it feels a little ghost to me i'm not trying to be ghost i'm not trying to be ghost no don't do come back hey buddy come here it's not ghosts it's ghost also you work for spirit halloween how are you scared of the word gauche? Which sounds like ghosts. I'm a driver. I don't see the scary stuff. So you've never looked in what's in the back of the truck?

I've never had to. Well, come on. Sorry, sir, on the phone. I never got your name. Oh, my name? Yeah. It's Doug Three. Doug.

God, of course it is. Okay, well, I just asked Dougs, right? Doug Three. No, no, my name is Doug Three It's Doug Three. Doug. God, of course it is. Okay. Well, just us Dugs, right? Doug Three. No, no, no. My name is Doug Three. I know. Doug Three. Can I put you on hold, Doug Three?

You can. Yeah. Okay. We might have to pay you more. You might have to pay me more. We just came into a lump sum. We have so much money and we don't know what to do with it. No.

You sound like a really nice person. I try to be. I really do try to be. That's kind of like what I want to be remembered for is being kind. And that's kind of what I'd say at parties. Sure. Actually, if you want to stay on the phone, I'm going to bring Doug 2 to the back of the car. You know, help him get over his fears, maybe.

I have time. I have time. Wait, no. Do not do that. Come on. Let's do it. I put your volume down a little bit. Can't hear it.

Do not do that at all. All right. Doug 2, come on. Let's go check it out. I want to say, you know, if your car's already backed up in the driveway, it'll be super easy. Are you sure? Give the key.

Let's, yeah. I mean, what? It can't possibly be anything real or scary. It's just decorations, costumes, right? I don't know. I really, I just get in the car. What do you think? What do you think you're transporting?

I don't know. Dead bodies. You've been working for Spirit Halloween for 12 years and you don't know what you're transporting? I don't know. Their bodies. You've been working for Spirit Halloween for 12 years. And you don't know what you're transporting. You say that spirit is your spirit. Those are your words. And you don't think that you're transporting Halloween items? Look, to work for a living is to be good.

And I strive to be good. So spirit is my spirit because it feeds my spirit. Because I put the work in i really do i don't know what's in the truck i don't need to know what's in the truck but open the truck open it dog two open your eyes it's fine the hell is this look it's just a bunch of you know some fake rubber bats a couple clowns and one giant skeleton it's all fake it's all fake just go go give it a poke he pokes the skeleton. Did you see that?

See what? It freaking moved on me. Don't, what are you talking, come on, it's just a really good animatronic. There is no power outlet on the truck.

It has batteries. It must, come on, go check the back of the skull or something. He checks the back of the skull. Did you even try the back of the skull or did you just look at it? I closed my eyes. I was too scared.

Doug 2, you need to open your... Hey, Doug 3, can you give him a little encouragement here? Don't let him see what's in there. Sorry, Doug 2, I put you off speaker. What are you talking about? Don't let him see what's in there. Sorry, Doug, too. I put you off speaker. What are you talking about? Don't let him see what's in there. Mr. Spirit accidentally committed vehicular manslaughter nearly 24 hours ago.

Have you seen Succession? Yeah, I've seen it. I mean, it's one of HBO's finest. You didn't hear any of this from me, and you didn't hear it at all. We sent Doug, our worst driver, to kind of fix a problem, if you know what I mean. You sent Doug, too, to get rid of a body.

A skeleton. That Mr. Spirit killed. Sorry. So the owner of Spirit Halloween's last name is Spirit? Yes. I guess it was his first name. Is it? It can't be Halloween.

Doug. No, it's not! We can't all be named Doug! It's a fortunate coincidence, but Doug needs to get where he's going. Well, this is, I have to call the cops. This isn't right. You're not going to call the cops. Is that a threat?

It's not anything, but you're not going to call the cops. Put me on speaker again. Put me on speaker. Okay, here you go. Doug, can you hear me? Yes, I can hear you. Do you know what you have to do? Yes. Okay, then do it. Doug, can you hear me? Yes, I can hear you. Do you know what you have to do? Yes. Okay,

then do it. Okay. He takes the skeleton, hands it to you. What did you do? No! Quickly closes the thing, gets to the car. Oh my god! Doug 3, Doug 3, are you still on the line?

God damn it! Throw the phone down. No! Coughs come up. god damn it throw the phone down god damn it i just blacked out for five minutes yeah okay here we go my review this is for the spirit halloween in marina del rey i've been to that one. This is from Marissa B. Basketball. Marissa Basketball. Is all of that the last name? Yes.

This is from Marissa Basketball. Marissa Basketball. Five stars. Okay. basketball marissa basketball five stars okay absolute fun place to go to celebrate halloween and prepare to have fun i bought a ton of stuff here at 50 off for next year and got the cutest outfits ever i stocked up pretty crazily i must. I also got a cute Ouija board blanket at half off, and it looks extremely cool for nights at the beach,

and I also stocked up on tons of goodies. The costumes I purchased are also great for work clothes or just to play dress-up in ordinary life. I am glad I shopped here when I did. Sizes were limited, so it's great to come early to shop. Patricia, you wanted to see me? Boss? Yeah. Yes. Katie, thank you so much for coming in i know we have a busy work day ahead of us can you tell me the date yeah yep that's exactly can you tell me the date can i need you

to read the calendar on my desk and i want you to tell me what day it is march 9th absolutely it's march 9th isn't it a beautiful spring day outside it really is i mean those those petunias are blooming they really are they really are and we have all please stop licking your hand paw this is exactly why i brought you in i know what this is about i know what this is about really okay great so we can fix it right here and now i fudged a little on my expense reports and for that i'm sorry but you but you have to admit that I was kind of snubbed for that promotion. Right? So I think it's fine that I got a lunch.

Yeah. I wasn't going to bring you about that today. Listen, you are one of our best employees here. Thank you. Is that all? Nope. That's absolutely not it. I did not bring you in here to tell you that.

Come with me to this window in my office. Ah, yep. Come with me in this window. Look out at everyone working. Yeah. All your coworkers. Sure. What do you see?

See a bunch of people dressed sort of bland. Obviously, yeah. Robert's been on the fritz, I think. I mean, you don't have to confirm or deny, but I think he's on the outs. Deny. Are you asking me if I had to fire somebody who I would fire? Because it's Robert. Nope.

I'm asking, what do you see people wearing? And you said everyone's dressed a little bland. A little bland. A lot of browns, a lot of grays, a lot of navies. Some people might call them neutrals. Some people might call them... Well, they're neutrals, but they make me feel negative. So I don't think they're net neutral.

Katie, you're wearing a sexy Tigger costume at work, right? Sure. Obviously, that's inappropriate. I can't believe that you are a 35-year-old woman and I had to bring you into my office to let you know that this is absolutely inappropriate. You need to go home and change right now. Well, let's figure this out

because there has to be a world where I don't have to go home and change. Nope, that is the only solution. We're not going to figure it out. You are at work. You have a springy tail that you think you can bounce on, but it just looks like you're kind of dropping it low in the cubicle. I truly don't see how my outfit is any more offensive than Robert's.

He's wearing the most pleated slacks I've ever seen. It's pleated like 18 ways in the front. But that's fine. It doesn't matter if it's boring. We're at work. He looks like he has a front ass you are showing your full ass you are wearing tiger stripe chaps sure assless okay you are put you have the tigger face paint on going whenever an email comes in katie it is march it is not halloween i'm not trying to like

if this was halloween and you were at a party i think you would win a costume contest but we are at an accounting firm yeah you can go home get changed into something more appropriate and come back i don't know i mean we got to figure this shit out because i don't i don't to me that's not an option to you that seems like the only, but there has to be a middle ground. There is no other option, Katie. I am your boss. I'm telling in the handbook what everyone had to read when they came in here. It gave strict dress code guidelines. We have a casual Friday every week, but that's when people can wear jeans.

Okay. Well, you know what? I saw Robert wearing jeans on a Thursday. And when I asked him about it, he said, oh, I thought it was Friday. Guess I'll just wear my normal thing tomorrow to make up for it. So how is that any different than me bending over near the water cooler to get Tyler's eyes on my ass? Do you hear yourself when you talk? I black out because I'm so nervous and I hate confrontation.

I'm good at it, but I hate it. You're not good at it. You're being really combative. And I don't know how I haven't fired you yet. Katie, if you don't go home in the next hour. For showing my ass to the company. Do you know how crazy you sound? Again, are you listening to yourself? Showing your ass to the company is not what we're about here. We have very important clients coming in in 20 minutes. And this could be a really, really big get for us. I don't know what to say.

I mean, I don't, you flaunt your shit all the time. You're in your office. Excuse me? You don't even put your blinds down and you're like fucking like checking yourself out to get taking selfies sometimes. That's none of your, that's none of your business, Katie. Also, your pants are very revealing as well.

Just because they cover your ass doesn't mean that we can't see that dump truck badonkadonk. This is an ass company. It really is. Just as she's saying dump truck badonkadonk, a very, very old couple walks in. They're like,

well, I hope we're in time for our meeting. Oh, Katie, Katie, you need to go to your cubicle right now. You need to get Robert because these are his potential clients. And you need to stay in your cubicle during this meeting. This could not be more important. If you think that Robert's going to nail this deal, you've got another thing coming. Let me make a little bet. If Robert books this deal, I've got another thing coming. Let me make a little bet. If Robert books this

deal, I will go home and change or honestly, I'll quit. You'll never have to hear from me again. But if he doesn't book this deal, I get to wear whatever I want, whenever I want, and everyone else has to as well. Everyone has to wear what they want? Yeah. If Robert doesn't book a deal deal everyone is forced to wear what they would like to wear a hundred percent fine cut to after the deal he didn't close it company meeting right now cut to the meeting everyone is in assless chat a couple days ago i made a deal with our co-worker katie no paperwork was signed. I was very stressed out.

And so I'll be rescinding my half of the deal. Everyone must go back to wearing what's appropriate to wear to work. Everybody starts getting up in arms. No, but you said no way. Throwing paper at her. Stop it. Stop it.

I have had enough of looking at everyone's bare moons all day, every day for the past week. Okay. This guys, what are we doing? What have we come to? We are the best accounting firm this side of the Mississippi. Somebody pushes their glass up. Actually, there's no proof proving that we can do math better than anyone else of any of our competitors. It's more of like a personal relationship thing.

Ian, sit down. I am sitting. Yes, sir. Everyone, if you don't cover your asses right now, we'll never be able to cover our asses and get this spotlight off of us. Did you see this? I'm throwing newspapers into the crowd. The town is writing articles about how we're the ass company of missouri so a stranger walks in excuse me oh i'm sorry if i'm interrupting a company-wide meeting um

are you who's in charge who do we talk to about new accounts me me hi um um i mean i guess i can do it here in front of everybody i uh am the financial representative for coca-cola local everyone starts sitting up in their seat we recently heard that you guys are the ass accountants oh no i'm i'm so sorry that we're trying to rebrand um that's that's not us or i would like it not to be oh that's a bummer because uh if you were i think we were wondering we're trying to move uh coca-cola up here and we wanted to land our entire parent company to your guys's accounting firm if you guys had the uh the bandwidth uh but if you guys aren't showing your asses then i think we're just gonna no wait wait wait wait um i looked at the

crowd my eyes getting very wide we are abs i misspoke i said um we are not trying to rebrand um i'm just a little confused though because you're wearing a full pan suit and that's not really what we want i mean i don't have to be i try and rip them off like they're gonna be a pair of pull-offs but they just tug on me uh sorry yeah i don't think this is gonna work out then no i dropped my pants we're officially moving coca-cola's entire headquarters over here start shaking their ass. Shaking their ass towards each other.

Happy Halloween. It's still March 9th. It's all been the day. It's like March 13th or whatever. Should we do our last segment? Yeah. This should be all week long. George and I got a bar.

We got a home bar. And it's ideal because he's a mixologist. He makes cocktails all the time. Follow him at atsecreatgeorgezaba. S-E-C-R-E-A-T. He needs to change that name. He loves it. No.

And it was just, it's like a nice little communal corner of our living room, dining room area. It looks really good. Yeah. I had to kind of, I don't have an Instagram, like I said, so I posted about the bar on the Review Review Instagram.

So it's very cool. It's like atomic modern, and we're going to dress it up. I think that's great. That's very exciting. I love how it looks already. What's been shaking me? I went to Joshua Tree and I am scared of heights. What's really cool about Joshua Tree for people who love this

and I wish I did love it more than I do. I do enjoy it, but I wish I wasn't as scared, is bouldering and scrambling on rocks and stuff like that. Yeah. Because I have bad knees. I have bad knees and weak ankles. So, you know, it's fine. I just, I don't trust my legs enough. And getting up, climbing is easier than getting down so daniel's just very daniel's like a mountain goat he could just go up things very

very quickly same with robert um and one thing i did make it to the top and that was an easier climb but um it's the getting down they're just like okay you know it's like putting you know just trust your feet trust your balance cut to me just on my ass the entire time and like under my i was literally going like okay come on you can do come on and get to the bottom and daniel gave me a high five he's like you did it i'm like yeah it was super fun and easy for me i was chill i'm outdoorsy i am i'm like that was nothing that was nothing i'm free everything out of you and you're like i was i free soloed the bish i free soloed the bish it's bish. It's like your ass is dusty. No.

What's that? So it was very fun. We'll go back again. It was an amazing time. I'm jealous. I really am. And tomorrow's Halloween-y. I'm going to amend my show, which shook me.

It's going to be short. But John Walker from Panic! at the Disco, back when they were actually good, released an acoustic cover of It's Almost Halloween. That's really good. And it made my fucking life. So if you like Panic! at the Disco back when they were actually good, released an acoustic cover of It's Almost Halloween. That's really good. And it made my fucking life. So if you like Panic!

at the Disco, go check that out. It's on his YouTube page. Let's thank our VI podcasts. Thank you to Aaron Carrico. Adam Shea. Agent Michael Skarn. Alex McCullough. Alex Watts.

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forward slash Riley and Jeff. Thank you guys so much for listening to this bonus episode of Review Review. We'll see you guys on Tuesday. All right, and happy Halloween. Be safe, okay? Be safe, be smart, don't die. And yeah, it'll be good. You can follow Jeff at I am Jeffrey. Oh, we'll see about your Instagram.

Still plug it. It's fine. I am Jeffrey James on Instagram. Don't play no James on Twitter. Find us at Review Review on Instagram. Review Review Show on Twitter. Reddit r slash Review Review. You can follow Riley at Riley Anspa on Instagram at Riley Coyote on Twitter. And, review, show on Twitter. Reddit, r slash review, review. You can follow Riley at RileyAnspa on Instagram, at RileyCoyote on Twitter. And what's your TikTok? I don't use it to post. Then follow me on TikTok because I'm using it so much, man.

And now I don't have Instagram. So don't follow me on Instagram. Follow me on TikTok at IamJeffreyJames. And we'll catch you Tuesday. Arriba there. See? That was a HitGum original.