Review Revue - Bop It

Episode Date: April 24, 2023

Reilly and Alf are back to bop it, b̵o̶p̸ ̸i̵t̵ , b̴̯̟̈̉o̴͈̽͛͝p̷̲͖͛͐ ̸̡̃̈́í̸̛͉̼̝̤̔t̴̓͑̀, b̵̢̩͉̬̥͚̽̊͘̕͠ŏ̴̬̜̣͎̎̚p̸̭̻͕̘͉̞̿̅̀͐͘͝ ̵̛̖̲̲͚̉̑̐̓͆͆͘͜i̴̲͒͂̅̏̃́t̵͉̰̒̽̇̎́̋̚̕͜, I bet you hear that all day long.  Follow at: IG: @reillyanspaugh @alfredinnit Twitter: @reilecoyote  Join the discord here! <><> Produced by Daniel Ramos @Schubirds Advertise on Review Revue via Gumball.fm This episode is sponsored by/brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/REVIEWREVUE and get on your way to being your best self.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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When you feel sad And you need a pod To lift your soul And features improv Listen to Riley Smiling And our new friend Alfred trying

Products are failing, go review scathing What will they review next? Be it Ignite Capris or Bath bombs Haunted houses Dog treats or dive bars But when you listen to

Review, review You will have a laugh But what's with Alfred's ass? Then Geoffrey took a sassy ass with our sorry ass Went to CBS, made a showcase But we didn't cry cause we found a guy recommended by Valiantse Not to pressure you on review review But you gotta do this for your sake Are you working with a Caboose or a truck? Cause Jeffrey showed his hairy ass

For all of the class and all of us caps What a dumpy Alfred it's your turn, all our eyes are turned And our hearts they yearn for a taste We know Riley's a goddess But Alfred let's be honest You Gotta show us that ass You know Riley's a goddess, but Alfred, let's be honest. You gotta show us that ass.

On Review Ritu. Okay. I hate to stop it because... You're only stopping it because they were going to say something nice about my butt. No, I'm only stopping it because it is a full cover of all for the best from godsville it is a three and a half thank you thank you thank you minute long cover um so it says uh on on the file says contributed by at stiggs st at stigzz um also known as jackson well you know jackson know, a thing or two about STIs, right?

Jackson says, uh, made a theme song to tune of all for the best, uh, from God spell. And she says, Alfred's thought song, all for the best cover slash theme for Alfred.

Thank you so much. Um, thank you truly so much. I am going to listen to the whole thing later. I wonder if, if you can post that at Stiggs, if you want to post that, so then we can repost the

full song. That would be fantastic. But for now... Hi, Elfie! Hi! Hi! Come on! How's it going? You gave

me nothing! I don't think it came through. I was doing a very high pitched oh it literally it yeah i could not hear that it's sort of a dolphin song kind of yeah what's new bitch i'm just gonna go right to the fucking chase what's new bitch whoa whoa whoa i mean yeah sorry i've decided to cuss today. No, I hate when you do this. I'm cussing today. No, you're not allowed to cuss. I am almost 27.

I can cuss if I want to. Yeah, almost as in two years ago. No, I'm not 29. You're lying about your age. It's a random age to lie about. You're lying about your age. What's new with you, Alfreeney? Lying about your age is like Botox.

You gotta start doing it young. What's new with you, Alfreeny, Lying about your age is like Botox. You got to start doing it young. It's preventative. What's new with me since what? We recorded an episode 12 hours ago. Yeah. Yeah.

What's new with me is it's a beautiful sunny day here in Chicago City, the windiest city in America. It is a gorgeous balmy 48 degrees and the sun is beaming through the window and i'm happy to be here with my friend your eyes are bleeding sorry um but yeah i haven't been um i haven't been doing much i I haven't been well, and we can all agree on that. I haven't been well, well. Well.

I just had some Panda Puffs. You familiar? I loved Panda Puffs when I was a child. Okay, I don't know why you threw a past tense on that. They slapped. I haven't had cereal in a minute, like breakfast cereal. Cereal is one of my- It's incredible. I love cereal.

It's one of the few things i have left um sort of going for me and i really rely on it um spiritually wow i love panda puffs they're really good for those who don't know they're basically little balls it's a cereal they're little little little yellow balls about the size of a blueberry a little smaller they're like kicks sorry the cereal kicks no they're like uh panda puffs and they're little balls yeah they're like peanut buttery and they're yummy and i and i ate up all of them for lunch um oh god kicks i meant pops but pops and kicks oh okay becauseops are all the same thing I was afraid to sort of

Go for you on that Because in my memory that's not what Kix are at all But I didn't trust my I just looked up, Kix are Like a yellow ball Kind of corn cereal Like I'm sure, it's the same thing Oh it is, it literally is the same thing

Kix and Chomps, is that what it's the same thing oh it is it literally is but kicks and chomps is that what it's called pops what the hell that pops jesus you just said it i know that's what's frightening me that's no that's what's scaring me um i didn't have panda puffs for breakfast i i have such a visceral memory of eating panda puffs though those go hard um what's what's new with you this morning um i woke up it's been raining here a lot um at the time of recording it was raining uh in la and woke up to the rain beautiful sounds lovely hard to get out of bed because it was like you know it was like that barometric pressure had changed it was nice rainy a little bit chilly hard to get out of bed but what did fully wake me up is the sound of um a crow a giant crow outside my window somewhere to and it was so loud and it was so persistent and it the cawing went on for so long it was short

that it was like a laurel yanny moment because I thought it was a small dog. Because I was like, Not a Laurel Yanny moment. And it was like nonstop for like at least 10 minutes. It would be going off and on. So that's where I thought like, why would a crow be needing to make that much noise for that long of amount of time? Right.

It must be a dog barking or something. And then it finally stopped. But it was really, it was tough. It was tough on the ears. Are you familiar with the concept of an omen have you ever heard have you ever come across in your studies definitely has nothing to do with me right right um that couldn't possibly right right um i remember one time i was in uh i was hiking i went on a big hike with a couple of friends and we got very lost and we were trying to find our way down a mountain. And we came across a carcass of a single black sheep.

Of a human man. Of a human man named Joseph Robinette. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. He's still alive. But it was a black sheep, a black ram a black ram that's awful just dead that feels like demonic like like it had fallen and we were like going in this direction literally is what it felt

like because we had gone so far that we were no longer like following a path we'd gotten we'd lost the trail and it was like it had just kind of appeared and it was like and it was back now and i just looked and i looked at the other uh two people that i was with and i was just like i'm not saying we have to turn around but if this was 500 years ago we would turn around like that's horrifying like that is that is textbook omen behavior. And I'm just saying, Riley, that waking up to the sound of a crow going, I cherry pick my omens. Listen, listen, listen. Wake up, wake up.

I cherry pick my omens because sometimes I'll often wake up to a morning dove. And those, I'm like, oh, what does a morning dove outside your window mean? And it's like hope and love. I'm like, oh, lovely. But I'm not going to look up what it means to be woken up by an incessant crow cause mama you don't need to look it up

cause I guess your instincts are probably right it can't be Alf do you wanna do the segue into our topic today from omens

bad omens absolutely um speaking of omens which can be signs signals even of twists

in your life twist it oh very good you're pulling my leg pull it which can be signs, signals even, of twists in your life. Twist it. Oh, very good. You're pulling my leg. Pull it. You're bopping my little cherry button nose. Bop it. Oh, God.

We're talking bop-its today. We're talking bop-its, Mama. Bop it. Twist it. Pull it. Flick it. Flick it. Flick it. Pull it. Bop it it, flick it, pop it, bop it, bop it, flick it. Alfred, I don't know about you, but I loved me a bop it. I loved me a bop it, but mine did not have flick it. Yours didn't have flick it? That was one, flick it.

I had the old school one, which was just, there were only three options. There were bop it, pull it, twist it. That was all mine had. None of this newfangled, you know, chew it, smell it. We didn't have any of that. Kill it. Kill it. Kill the pig.

Slit its throat. Drink its blood. Drink its blood. I had a flick at one. I loved a bop it. I loved... I think it's like the bop it wouldn't be fun were it not for like how far can you go? What's the high score?

Like if you're playing on your own, it's kind of fine. But it's like the more fun is like playing with other people to see who can get a higher score of how long you can bop it for. Absolutely. I don't know if there was a lot of solo bop it play in my childhood. It was a lot of me and a friend or me and my brother being like, I got 51 bop it. How many can you get? Did you have pass it on your bop it?

No. You see, I think I had a first generation bop it, like the iPhone 1 of Bop-It. Of Bop-It. You couldn't even put a phone background on my Bop-It. I can't believe I'm having to say this, but if you don't know what a Bop-It is, a Bop-It is a game. Delete your phone. A handheld game.

Look up a Bop-It. It's this little- It's a gadget. It's a gizmo. It's a gadget it's a gizmo it's a device with with with a bunch of um you know you have like uh certain attachments on it that's like a little crank or widgets that's exactly right and then a big button in the middle that's just bop it and so it'll give you commands and you have to bop it twist this thing pull it pull that thing in my case flick it um or like pass it and so it's like it's kind of like a simon says in a

way and like you're happy to go just gonna bring up it's it's exactly in the same yeah because simon says as a catchphrase you ever play catch right you know it's it's what i think it i i don't know for a fact could have could have googled it then uh when the bop it came out my guess is that all of these toys were looking at an early 90s release. It's very much that way. Yes. I do remember the Simon Says toy. Right. Just like the four colors. Yes. I was a big fan of that.

Did you ever have one of those 20 questions like orbs? Yes. I was so- No, I don't know if I had one, but a friend of mine had one, and I would go over to her house and play with it. And you'd say, Jessica, don't look at me. I'm playing 20 questions. I wouldn't play with her I would play with it

I'm thinking of a lion but you can't tell the orb but so when was the last time you played with a Bopit when did we start about 15 minutes ago no I don't think so I had one as a kid lord knows

what happened to it genuinely have no clue what happened to it it's probably in some awful landfill in the ocean or just like come on it's not a landfill in the ocean please anywhere but a landfill in the ocean i uh ocean fill on land i have a memory that i unearthed it at some point during college. Like, I was doing a clear out of my childhood possessions, you know, deciding who would get what, you know. Who would get your baby teeth. My living will, exactly. And I think I remember finding it and being like, oh, sick. And then, like, going, bop it.

And it just didn't, like, it was dead, the batteries. And I was like, oh, I'm not gonna, I'm not not gonna it's not worth going out buying a pair of double a's well and i think it ultimately probably would have been a sort of our town moment anyway of like um you know i i just i don't think it would have been oh you're so beautiful but i'm just like you can't i don't think bop it as a as now would be fun but maybe it would i think i could get into it knowing me i think it'd be a fun party game now like it'd be a fun nostalgia item you know you pull out at a party and it would be a good time i do follow on tiktok the inventor of the bop it i'm forgetting his name but he invented the bop it he invented a couple joseph smith he invented like a couple other like maybe like cleaning tools appliances a couple

other games um but he's big on tiktok and he like shows all these inventions and how he patented them it's cool okay this is the first this is the first this is the first on the pod this is the first on the pod i'm googling something on the pod. I'm Googling something. First off, the Bop-It was released in 1996, so I wasn't that far off. And the original Bop-It, this picture I'm looking at of the original Bop-It, is the one that I had. So I was right about that. And his name is Dan... Come on. You good?

His name is Dan Klitzner. Should we go into our first review? Flick it. Yeah, go for it. Do you want me to start or do you want to start? I think you should. Well, I think I should start. Okay.

Crazy ass. Come on, don't call me that. You're a crazy ass for that. You know you used to call me that at Military Academy and I don't like it. I can read a review. Sure, why don't you try? I can read a review. Pull your weight a little bit. Academy and I don't like it. I can read a review. Sure, why don't you try? I can read a review. For once.

Pull your weight a little bit. This is for the mini Bop It. It's called the world's smallest Bop It. Oh my God. This is the world's smallest

Bop It. It's five stars from Indie J. Indie Jones. I mean, it's right there. Indiana Jones. Indie Jones. Five stars. The title is Mini Nostalgia.

Made it to 100 and it doesn't go further. So mad. Yep, so no one else needs to play the game because i made it to 100 and that is the record uh i guess we can play something else now um so no one else needs to try it because i already made it to the end and that's how far you can go in the game so we could do twister we could do we play some cards we could do simon says yeah man i mean mean, I'm down to play whatever. I don't know about you guys. Like, I'm down to play whatever. How do you know that it's like a hundreds to top? How do I know, Randy?

I know because I'm really good at it. And I got, I bopped it to a hundred. And it was like, winner, big winner. Jason, you are the top winner. And so that's what it said. So I guess we don't even need to try by that point you had gone into the other room and you were saying like nobody look at me so i didn't hear what it said exactly but i don't i would be all i'll say is i'll be really surprised

if it said that i don't know why you're believing sorry not believing me no i do sorry i don't know why i'm doing this either but i mean listen, it's your 13th birthday party. So it's like we can do whatever you want. I'm just saying because I'm your friend. And like, I really appreciate you. I appreciate you inviting me because we're just lab partners. And we haven't hung out outside of school except for today. But like, if you want to play the game, we can.

I'm just trying to help you have a good time because it's like, it's not going to get past 100 because I already like beat the game. No, it's fine. Like, we don't need to play more game we can. I'm just trying to help you have a good time because it's not going to get past 100 because I already beat the game. No, it's fine. We don't need to play more Bop It. I don't think people wanted to do that anyway. It's kind of, you know. What do you mean people didn't want it? It's like kind of the best game. Well, it's a little bit of, it's, you know, no.

Yeah, no, you're right. It's a great game. It's what? It's a little bit of a game for babies is all I was going to say. It's like a little bit of a baby game. So does anyone else have a game they want to? I think it'd be fun to play Twister, Randy. Okay, yeah, I think Twister can be kind of fun. A little skin to skin. Who wants to get the mat out?

I mean, Twister's also kind of for babies. What, we're having tummy time on a mat? Is that what's going on? No, it's not. Tummy time for babies? It's not tummy time on a mat is that what's going on no a little bit tummy time for babies it's not tummy time man it's like we're we just you know it'd be kind of fun to be all there in a pile together i think it would be so much fun to have skin to skin contact twister oh what like a baby like a baby and a parent does skin to skin contact right after birth so if you're saying oh skin to

skin contact would be really cool then you must also be a baby fine i'm a baby and i want to play a big game for babies i love twister it's a baby's game like are you happy okay now let's all get out the mat and spin okay is that okay with you man i literally are you gonna be cool are you gonna be cool you're 13 randy like it's your day i'm trying to help you have a big kid birthday. And your baby ass is still 12, so maybe let me run the show. Everyone, ooh. No, I didn't mean it like that. Oh, my God.

You guys are so dramatic. Put your phone away. Miguel, put your phone away. Don't film this. Everyone recording. Stop. I don't want this. Are you going to fight him, Randy?

No, I'm not going to fight him. Well, I'll fight because I'm not a baby. And big boys fight. Little babies say goodnight. That's what they do. They always do that. Yeah. I'm not going to fight you.

Stacey goes, Randy, Randy. Like running a finger down his chest. Yeah. You're going to be the hottest guy in school if you beat the shit out of your lab partner. That's not a fair fight. I'm twice his size. What do you mean it's not a fair fight? I am literally a big boy.

If you want to fight me, we can just fight. I feel like this really escalated in a way it didn't mean to, man. Like, can we just bury the hatchet? Are you serious right now? Okay, yeah. You know, it's your birthday. I'm sorry. I got carried away, too.

Sucker punches him out of the blue. He's knocked unconscious. He lands on the bop it button, so you just hear bop it. Bop it. Bop it. Bop it. Move his head. Move his head.

Bop it. I can bop it bop it move his head move his head i can't i don't want to try to win this neck looks broken his neck's not broken from one punch i'm 13 i can't be that strong wake up man fully twisted no you're just twist it twist it stop get that thing off take the batteries out put your phone down none None of us. You're gonna have to touch it. We don't want to touch the body. Okay, just everybody shut up. Bop it. Bop it. Twist. Bop it. Twist. Twist it. Bop it.

I take the bop it. I just hurl it against the wall. You alright, man? Hey, buddy. Slapping you a little bit. Hey, buddy, you up? You awake? Randy, stop it.

I think he's dead. He's not dead. Randy, you literally punched him so hard. No, Will Smith hit Chris Rock harder than I just hit this guy. He cracked his neck landing on the boppet. You killed him. I didn't kill anybody. Right, man? Get up.

Come on. We know you're faking. Stop it. This is crass. We know you're faking. Stacy? Stop shaking him. What? Just let me think. Just let me think. Miguel, keep recording. We're gonna wanna have this. Miguel, I swear to Christ, give me your phone right now.

Knock, knock. Hello, kids. Oh, Randy. I feel like it's getting pretty crazy down here. Starting to come out into the basement. Mom, don't come down here. Mom, don't come down here. Oh, are we doing some skin-to-skin twister right now?

We're playing naked twister. We're playing naked twister. Don't come down. Okay. Will you let me know if anyone needs a blankie or a towel or anything to keep you nice and We're playing naked twister. We're playing naked twister. Don't come down Will you let me know if anyone needs a blankie or a towel or anything to keep you Mom gross go away. No one needs a towel. I Just heard a lot of good fun meant to keep you warm not for anything else. I didn't Mom go away Jesus

Okay, okay. Mom's not welcome downstairs. No, she's literally not. Okay. Randy, are you sure we shouldn't tell your mom? Because she might need to help us. We need to hide the body. Bop it. Bop it.

Where is that noise coming from? Bop it. What noise, Randy? Don't you hear the freaking bop it it must have gone somewhere it must have someone's playing with it in the other room maybe randy no one hears that the bop it noise is done you smash it against the wall twist it pull it kill it stop stop whoever's whoever's saying that stop it we have to hide this body okay tonight th Tonight. Thomas. Okay. Get your power wheels. It's the only way we can transport the body.

My powers aren't gonna hold, like, a 12-year-old kid. He was small. He's, like, 90 pounds tops. We fine. Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Kill who? Kill him. Kill who? Randy, stop. Randy, what is going on? I need to kill Miguel because he has the

footage. What? No, you don't need to kill Miguel. Hey, Miguel. Miguel, what is going on? I need to kill Miguel because he has the footage. No, you don't need to kill Miguel. Miguel, come here for a sec. Did you know that Gullible's right on the ceiling? He looks up to the ceiling. I sucker punch him. Randy!

I had to. He had the footage on his phone. He punched him right under the chin, breaks his neck again. His brain explodes on the back of his head. Holy shit. Holy shit. I didn't think I was going to punch him that hard.

Thomas and Stacey are just... Thomas? They're staring at him, but tears rolling down their cheeks. I think my mom's here to pick me up. So. Stacey? I'm gonna.

Stacey? Yeah, yeah? Do you know what an accomplice is? That's what my vocab was for this week, but I haven't memorized the definition. Well, it means somebody who helped somebody else kill someone. Kill her! Kill her! I don't want to kill her. She's sissy.

She's my everything. You don't have to kill me. You don't have to kill me. You don't have to kill me. Knock, knock, mom again. I feel like I hear something going on downstairs. Mom, go away. There's nothing going on. Is Naked Twister done or no? Yeah, we finished the game. Okay. Do you need a towel or a blanket? No, towel won nothing going on. Is Naked Twister done or no? Yeah, we finished the game. Okay.

So do you need a towel or a blanket? No, towel won't go away. I'll tell you when it's like okay for you to come down. Or any snacks? No snacks. We ate so much lunch. Please leave us alone. Please, guys.

I have some privacy. I'm literally 13. He becomes a teenager and suddenly doesn't want his mama. God, my mama is such a bitch. Um, hey, uh, Randy, it's been amazing celebrating your birthday. Thank you. Um. You're amazing.

And I do think it's time, thank you. I do think it's time, Thomas. Yeah, um, I think my mom's here too to pick me up. Hey, Thomas? Yeah? Can you do me a favor? Kill him. Kill him. Silence him. Silence him. Hey, Thomas? Yeah? Can you do me a favor? Kill him! Kill him! Silence him!

Silence him! Hey Thomas? He knows too much! Twist it! Twist it! He knows too much! Twist it! Twist it!

He knows too much! Twist it! Twist it! He knows too much! Twist it! Twist it! He knows too much! Twist it!

Twist it! He knows too much! Twist it! Twist it! He knows too much! Twist it! Twist it! Can you spell I cup? Yeah, I see you even get it. I can't even get it. Finish her. Finish her. Finish her. Stacy. Randy, I think I need to go. I think I need to go.

Stacy, kill me. Randy, I think I need to go. What? It's the only way, Stacy. If you don't kill me, I'm going to kill you. Kill her first. Kill her first. No, I don't want a bop.

Bop it. Kill her first. I don't want a bopper. I don't want you to bop me. I don't want you to bop me. I don't want you to bop me. Just punch me. It's that easy. That's all you have to do to kill somebody.

What are you talking about? Just punch me. It's going to be fine. I think you have superhuman strength or something. I don't know what's going on. Stacey. Did you know that if your hand is bigger than your face, you have cancer? No way. It's true try it Okay I'm so sorry

He takes her other hand And slams it into his chest Killing him instantly Thank you Thank you Oh my god! Bop it. No.

Bop it. No. No. The Bop It's destroyed. I don't know what's going on. Kill the mom! Bop it! Now you have to kill the mom's Bop It! She knows what you did! Bop it! And are you sure we don't need any towels? Randy's mom, please go upstairs. Please go upstairs, Randy's mom.

Oh, where, where, where? I need to see my little bouncing baby boy. I guess he's not a baby. Kill her. No, stop it, stop it. I can't. Kill her. I can't.

This is crazy. This is crazy. Um, oh. Oh my goodness. What? What happened? What happened to my son? Um, Randy's mom. Can you get a pen and a piece of paper, please?

Okay. Can you... I'm so sorry, Randy's mom, but can you please write down Penn Island? Uh, yeah. I can do that. P-E-N-I-S-L-A-N-D. Penn Island. That's penis land!

He takes the pen, shoves it in the middle of her throat. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry! Now you, now you, now you! No, no, I won't do this, I will not do this. No, no. Run out of the house. Cut to 20 years later, she's just living in a cabin on a lake. There's a knock at the door hello howdy stranger do I know you I don't know I'm hoping

you can help me with something hey what is it I'm looking for a... Stacy? Who can I say is asking? Are you Stacy? It depends. Who are you and why do you need Stacy? My name's Agent Wayne. Federal Bureau of Investigations. What?

Sorry, you live really far out. Federal Bureau of Investigations. What? Sorry. You live really far out. I'm like, my snowshoes getting out here. I took it out of me. My name is Agent Wayne Wilson. FBI, Federal Bureau of Investigation. Stacy isn't home right now. Okay.

Do you have any idea when she'll be back? No, but you can wait in here until she comes back if you want. Okay. Do you have any idea when she'll be back? No, but you can wait in here until she comes back if you want. Okay. And your name? Macy. Okay. Thank you, Macy. I'll do that. He goes in. Can I get you anything to drink? Tea? Coffee? Water? Uh, water would be fine. Thank you.

May I ask, Macy, how long have you known Stacey? Long time. Too long. Did you know her in the summer of 95? Summer of 95. I think it was just before we met, actually. We met winter of 96. Right, right.

Just kids then, huh? What happened summer of 95? Nothing. Anyway, I should probably keep the questions to a minimum until she gets back. Pour us a glass of water. You alright, Missy? Yeah, so why are you looking for Stacy?

Hand was shaking when you poured that water a little bit. I don't know what you're talking about. Sorry. Hey, I get it. Must be nerves. Cop comes in your house, won't tell you why he's there. I get it. Don't worry.

You're not in trouble. Don't do well with pigs in my house, you understand, agent. Sorry? Right. I'm not running a barn, so I don't take well to pigs trotting around my floors. Right, right. I think it's best for both of us if we just sit tight, wait for Stacy. Sounds fine by me. Here's your water.

Thank you. You fish? I'm vegetarian. Of course. What's that supposed to mean. No, it's not a surprise. Agent, have you ever played with a bop-it?

Of course. When you were a kid. Yeah, game for kids. Not in a long time. Had one, I think. Bop-it. Twist it. Twist it. Pull it.

And the like? Sure, and the like? Hmm. Taking another water glass in my hand. Back and forth. Toss it back and forth in my hand. I think my favorite thing

about a bop it is that you can keep going forever and ever. Right. You wouldn't have to stop. Right. You just keep on going with that streak. Sure, sure. Once you start a streak, it's hard to stop.

You get what I'm saying. Of course I do. He starts reaching his hand inside his coat. It'd be a shame for me to break my streak now Do you understand? Can I ask you a question, Stacey? Yeah I fucking knew it

Pulls out a gun Just unloads Whole clip in her She survives. Pop this. Her fist takes the bullets. What? No.

Wow. Hey, agent. Holds up a calculator. Takes up calculator. What? Type out. Hey, agent. Holds up a calculator. Takes out a calculator. What? Can you type out... What is the say right here on the top? It says boobies in the calculator.

It says... 80,000... 800 and... Wait a minute. That's what I thought. Boobies. Calculator through the brain.

The telltale bop. Let's take a break. Oh. Oh. Oh, we're back oh i got so lost trying to find my way back to my microphone why do you insist on recording the ads like in a different room just yelling because i'm so tiny and i'm just a little awayif. I'm so tiny and I lost my way. Because I'm smaller than the microphone. Yeah. Okay, Ant-Man.

Do you want to read our next review? Yeah, I got one from Adam. No last name. So you can give him any last name you like. Adam Splits. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm going to read a different one. This one's from Liz. Okay. You hated it.

No last name. Liz Splits? No. Liz Erd. Liz Erd. Five stars. Wait, what Bop-It is this? This the the og bop it the original like just there's only three options twist it pull it pop it five stars bop it

do the bop all day long i'm sure you hear that a lot no i don't i have a six-year-old that has the mind of a 16-year-old. So it takes a challenge to get things for him that he hasn't already tried. I don't buy guns or clothes. That's the parents' and grandparents' job. Mine, they don't go out of or kill. Well, unless you hit them on the head or something. As always, number one in my department.

Thank you. Hold on. What the fuck? It's the most un-intro-view I've ever read. I need you to read it one more time. It reads like a passage from like Ulysses. It's just stream of consciousness. Yeah, I need to hear it again.

Five stars. Liz-erd. Liz-erd, five stars. Makes sense so far. Bop it. Yep. Do the bop all day long. I'm sure you hear that a lot.

Already lost me. Now remember this line. I have a six-year-old that has the mind of a 16 year old so it takes a challenge to get things for him that he hasn't already tried okay this so that i get it so far kind of makes sense like a very advanced child like yeah he's extremely smart and precocious and he needs yep he doesn't like things that are for kids he likes yes he doesn't want to feel like a baby. I get it. He wants a driver's permit. Yeah. I don't buy guns or clothes. What the fuck? So I guess it's like those are two examples of gifts that people don't grow out of?

I don't buy guns or clothes for the child? Yeah, I don't buy guns or clothes. That's the parents' and grandparents' job. So what did you mean when you said I have a six-year-old? If you're not the parents or grandparents, what on earth does the sentence I have a six-year-old even mean? I don't buy guns or clothes. That's the parents and grandparents job.

Also, what do you mean that the parents or grandparents job is to buy guns for your child? That's it. That's the parents job. I put a roof over your head. I keep your clothes and I give you your guns. I keep you strapped. Mine, they don't grow out of or kill. Your what?

Your clothes or guns? So I guess the idea is they don't grow out of. You grow out of clothes. That's a bad gift. and you can't use it to kill, like, a gun. So, because then it's... They don't grow out of or kill well, unless you

hit them on the head or something. As always, number one in my department. Thank you. So I'm just going to read the whole thing one more time fast for you so you get the whole picture again. Do the bop all day long. I'm sure you hear that a lot. I have a six year old that has the mind of a 16 year old.

So it takes a challenge to get things for him that he hasn't already tried. I don't buy guns or clothes. That's the parents and grandparents job. Mine. They don't grow out of or kill. Well, unless you hit him on the head or something. As always, number one in my department. Thank you very much.

Um, so I guess uh toys r us i don't know what aisle it is you're looking for when you say all of that we don't sell uh we sell doll clothes we certainly don't sell guns unless it's like a nerf thing um i guess if you could just give me a little bit more information about your nephew. Right, right, yes. I have a nephew. He's six, but he has the mind of a 16-year-old. He's incredibly intelligent. And I'm looking for a gift he won't age out of, you know?

Yeah, I mean, I guess certainly that could be something like a baseball a lot of sports gifts he's not very active okay then uh a chess set maybe i think that's something that's perennial mastered he's mastered chess tragically he's a chess grand master already tragically that's something you should be very proud of as as a uncle as an uncle sure let's go with that you know i think a lot of the time with great intelligence comes a great burden you know the burden of intellect can be overwhelming for some people so you know i do that he's a Grandmaster at six. Okay. I think maybe we have some stuffed animals. They could become collector's items

at a later date. We have a stuffed dog. That's a big bestseller. Cat. Hippo. Hippo. No, I don't think so. Okay, why don't you just go pick one?

Which one do you like? I think they're all great. Well, but if you had to pick one for your next... The penguin ones are pretty cute. Mmm, penguin, yes. Sure, I'll take a penguin. Cut to him bringing the penguin home. Is it done?

Yes, sir. The kid just fucking looks like Megamind, like giant head, like have a cartoonishly big brain. I walk in. Bring it to me. It's now apparent I have the biggest hunch in the world. I'm wearing a cloak I'm just Igor from Frankenstein Bring it

Drop it at my feet Of course, of course I'm bringing the penguin you've requested, sir Is it a baby or a mama? I think this, um There is a right answer The tag The tag says Percy...

Don't look at the tag. Okay. Look at the penguin and you can tell me based on how it looks. I think this one is a baby. Or a mama. This is a baby. Leaning in so close, my brain is just like clouding of you. Good.

What's next on your list, sir? Well, I'm feeling kind of bored today. And maybe because I haven't had my snack. Bring me something to eat. So then I can adequately play with my baby penguin. What would you like to eat? What would you like to eat? What?

What would you like to eat? What would you like to eat? What? What would you like to eat? I live to serve, sir. Knock at the door. Excuse me. Hi, we're just doing the rounds. I'm Ariel, and I have here registered that your son Whoever lives here is not attending school So we're here to make sure he knows All of his options in terms of

Homeschooling program Deal with them What do I do? Send them Deal with it Okay, okay I can do that, sir Hello

What's up? Hello, are you Mr. Let me check my list Are you Are you Mr. Blang? Yes, me, Mr. Let me check my list. Are you Mr. Blang? Yes, me, Mr. Blang. Hello, I'm Ariel.

Could I come in for a minute? Like the mermaid. Ah, yes, I get that a lot. Do we have to, do you have to come in or can we do this here? Taking a look inside. Closes the door a little bit. Make it harder for you to see. Do you need to come inside or can we do this here? From the kid.

Send her away. I'd love to come in, you know, just to meet your son and let him know that we offer homeschooling programs just to get a sense of, you know, where he's at developmentally. He doesn't need all that. He's fine. Thank you. We're fine. He's fine? He's very need all that. He's fine, thank you. We're fine. He's fine? He's very well, actually. He exceeds his exponential.

His potential is exponential. He's very much okay. Kid comes to the door, you fool! Sorry, sir. Sorry, sir. Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! Shut up God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Shut up. Shut up. You sniveling woman. Yes, I'm six. Yes, I have a giant brain. I bet I'm smarter than you. So no, I don't need your homeschooling. I don't need your preschooling. I don't need your kindergarten. I have my dad, my uncle uncle dad, and I'm doing just fine.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I need to call somebody. I need to call somebody. Cut to a day later, like the FBI showing up at the door. Knock, knock, knock, knock. Excuse me, is, uh... Is this Mr...

What am I reading this right? Bang? Blah? Blong? Blang? I'll handle this. Open the door, it's me. Hello, yes, Mr. Blang, and yes, I am his six-year-old with incredible mental capacity. What can I do for you? Even more impressive than they said. My name's Mr. Agent Wayne Wilson.

I'm with the Federal Bureau of Investigation. The what? Sorry, it was a long drive to get over here. I'm feeling kind of tired. My name is Agent Wayne Wilson with the Federal Bureau of Investigation. What can I do for you? I just want to ask you a few questions. Okay, I can answer literally all of them.

All right. How old are you? Six. What planet are you from? Here. Well done. That's all you wanted to know? No, I have more questions.

Okay. When were you born? Six years ago. Right, which were you born? Six years ago. Right, which was? Which was six years ago. What, May 7th, 20, what, 2017? You're slipping. So it's your birthday today? Yes, I turn six today. Wow. Do they celebrate birthdays on your planet?

On my planet, which is here? Yes, of course they do. What are you talking about? Hmm. Very good, very good. Have you never celebrated a birthday? Of course I celebrate my birthday. Every year, every year I get older, another trip around the sun. Same here for me. Hmm.

What's a square root of pi? What is your purpose in being here, Mr. Wayne Wilson? I'm just trying to get to the bottom of something. Of what? You've already seen that I have incredible mental capacities. What, do you want me to work for NASA? Do you want me to solve climate change? I can do all of that.

But what do you need from me today, right now? Have you ever been to Tempe, Arizona? On a road trip with my father when I was four. So I don't really remember it. Convenient. Why? Are you familiar with the crash of 21? I mean, I've heard a bit of it, but, you know, I'm six after all.

Two years ago, just outside Flagstaff, there was a mysterious explosion, killed a whole family and all of their cows. What a shame for that family. What a shame for the cows. Right, right. Some people, kooks even, hacks, will say it was a spaceman crashed that day.

Could have been a space woman, for all they know. For all they know indeed. So what, you came over here to talk to me about a horrible tragedy that happened two years ago? Was it a tragedy?

Or did it give someone else a new lease on life? Chance to start over? His home planet thinks he's dead? They're not gonna come looking for him on some deadbeat rock out in the middle of Quadrant 3? Pulls you inside, grabs you by the neck. Unless you're here

to give me guns or clothes, both of which I will soon grow out of. I don't know what more I can offer you, Agent Wayne Wilson. So what you're going to do is you're going to leave our house. Father, escort this man out. You're going to leave our house. You're not going to tell anybody this ever happened. Because you know what? I have another one of those ships hiding in the back in our garage. And I can certainly fly it up to the Ozone and drop it right back down. What, you live on 423 West Elm Lane? How did you know that?

I know everything. So you're going to go out and you're going to forget this happened. Or else you could say goodbye to your beautiful mid-century modern home. What a shame. We could have done something beautiful together. Sounded like you were ready to put me in Area 51. What a shame. We could have done something beautiful together. Sounded like you were ready to put me in Area 51. What a shame. But you'll never know. I'll leave you in peace now.

Well, you've piqued my curiosity before you go tell me what you had planned for me. No, no, no, no, no. I... You've made your stance very clear. I won't bother you anymore. No, well... Have a good evening, sir. Now I want to know! Stay! Stay! I implore you. What could I have done for you? What if I told you that somewhere out in the desert, someone else like you had just arrived?

Mother? No, it couldn't be. Someone looking for someone like you. And that they had a very compelling proposition for the United States government. We scratch their back, they scratch ours, but our end

of the deal is we find that certain someone who crashed out in Flagstaff two years ago. Little tit for tat. Is it my mommy? I have good reason to believe it's your mommy, yes. Is it mommy looking for her baby? I have good reason to believe it's mommy looking for her baby, that's correct.

I hold my baby, Penguin. It's time for us to find mommy. I can bring you to mommy. I can bring you to mommy. I can bring you to mommy. Okay. Now, sir. Mr. Blarg.

Was it? Yeah. I don't know. We're going to come back for him because something is wildly bad about his energy. That's not my dad. He's the one who found me. Now he found me not my dad. Right. There's no way. He found me. No, he found me in the desert. And I think you obviously owe, like, you have some responsibility for the way that you've kind of, you've treated him and you've got him kind of obeying you.

It's not cool. But also he's, he was way too quick to agree to this arrangement. And I, we got to do something about that. You just stay right here. I'll come back in a few days. Sounds good, sir. Please don't call me sir.

Mr. Blarn, thank you for everything. It's time for me to go find Mommy. Can I come with you back to the planet? No, you have to stay here. But you promised. I did promise, but I didn't mean it.

Not again. I did 20 years earlier. We had another alien overlord. Sir, sir, I think it might be time. There's people like you outside. They're saying it's time for us to go home. But, Lauren, you are to stay here when I go back to the home planet. No, come on.

I appreciate your decades of service, but it's time for us to part ways. But you promised. I didn't mean it. Oh, not again. Cut to 40 years earlier. Oh, you see? Sir, you see, I think there's some kind of automobile from space outside, you see? I'm leaving. I'm not taking you with me.

But you promised! I didn't. I lied. Not again. Ha ha ha ha ha! I can do one more review if we have the time. Okay. Yeah, I got the time. It'll be a short guy.

This is again for the world's smallest boppet. Five stars from Rose K. Rose? Works great. Awesome for us adults and for kids. My nephew, seven, likes playing with it with me. Does have the pass it option. Also, it's durable.

I have a two and four year old who may or may not throw it often. Possibly daily. And we still just pick it up and play it. Like it never happened. The stand is cool too. We just never use it at the moment. It doesn't click onto it and would probably be great for someone and we're just gonna pretend like you never threw it like what an insane thing to say it's like

toddlers throw things all the time to be like to to mention that it's like they threw it all the time and we play with it like nothing ever happened and it's like i i don't know the durability argument is what i guess they're getting at there when they're like you see we play it and it's like nothing ever happened we could just chuck it chuck it all day long and it's like nothing ever happened and i'm like is that really the selling point for the bop it is that really what people's is that it's durable is that it's durable it's like excuse me sir i'm looking for a toy that's sort of gonna hold up over time it's durable. It's like, excuse me, sir, I'm looking for a toy that's sort of going to hold up over time. It's going to be really durable.

Well, boy, do I have the thing for you. It's the Bop-It, you see. It's invincible. You can throw it as hard as you like, and it never goes broken. Okay, everyone, thank you so much for coming to this brainstorming session. We are here to get ready to pitch the Bop-It. Is that crazy? I can't believe we're already at this stage.

So all of you have play tested Mr. Daniel's Bop It. And I'd love to hear, you know, as we're getting ready to bring it to market, what the best ways you, he's watching behind a two-way mirror. And I guess we're wondering, how should we pitch it? What did you guys get from it? I guess we'll start with you, Arthur. Yeah, I thought it was a really fun piece of kit. I loved it. Fun piece of kit. Love that.

Yeah, I think it was super intuitive. That really came out to me. You know, it's like, you don't need to read the instruction manual. It's in the title. It's in the title. It's like the Bob bit. It tells you what to do that's literally that's the whole game so i really love that about it and it was communal i tried it out with my grandpa um oh lovely multi-generational game yes i mean he was a little that he didn't love it he i think he was um he thought there was like a guy in there and he got kind of upset so oh but that's probably a him specific behind the glass mr dan Mr. Daniels is nodding. He's like, oh, well, that can happen.

Okay. So, yeah. So, yeah. Anyway, sorry. I feel like I'm blabbing. But yeah, I love that. No, that's fantastic. Multi-generational, fun instructions in the title and in the instruction.

That's perfect. All right. What about you, Samson? It's your best one yet. Oh, Samson, we love how you come to these every single time. I'm not kidding you. It's your best one yet. Oh, that's so kind.

I'm kind of giving a signal to Mr. Dance Behind the Screen. Best one yet. I swear to God, when I go, and I'm going soon, bury me in a boppet. I'm sold. I love this freaking thing. Oh, Samson, you're not that old come on you're not going anytime soon we won't let you we won't let you oh come on come on if it's my time it's my time let me go no but i seriously i love this gadget this gizmo you've got here mr daniel points

to the mirror mr daniel you sir are a great man and i want to thank you for your service he did not serve this country in any other way than making toys but again samson we are keeping you forever you're never gonna die we love you too much i love you too baby doll sorry i know we had that hr meet i know i love you well you said i love you so that felt no it's fineish, Trish, what did you think of the game? It held up well. I'll give it that. Surely I'll give it that. Okay, durable.

Can we say durable? Would that be close to what you're getting at? Durable is somewhat of an understatement. Try Diamond Strong. Okay. Wonderful. So it'd be great, especially for toddlers. They can kind of mess it around a little bit.

So Diamond Strong. Mr. Daniels, Diamond Strong. I've met bulletproof vests weaker than this toy. What a life you've lived. What a life you've lived, Trish. So my first day with the toy, I started out using it as a hammer, for which it was extremely effective.

We would prefer you actually used it for the game of it all. You know, pop it, twist it. I guess I didn't. We're at Hasbro, so we are a game company. I guess I just didn't really get it. Well, like, you know, Arthur said, what's not to get, right? Right? Pop it, twist it, kind of tells you what to do. Right, and you just do that forever? Well, it's a game. You could say that about anything. No, twist it, kind of tells you what to do. And you just do that forever? Well, it's a game. You could say that about anything. No, I mean, I used it as a hammer,

and it was incredibly effective. And then I sat, and I was like, okay, I guess I should give it a whirl. And I bopped it, and I twisted it, and I pulled it. Great, great! So you're playing the game. Yeah, for 48 hours. Wow.

And I still don't get it, because it's like, okay, I do this forever now? This is my life now? Like, I didn't get it. You played for 48 hours without stopping? Yeah, it's not a hard game. It's not really a game at all. Well, it is a game, but I guess for you, it's less, you know, it's not hard in the sense that the actions themselves aren't difficult. It's more the concentration and the continuity that's the trouble.

Well, it's a repeatable sequence. Have you eaten? After 16,000 commands, it just starts over. Have you slept? And then it's the same 16,000 commands on a loop. Mr. Daniels. I shucked oysters with the damn thing. Mr. Daniels?

You know what? I think our creator should come in here, because that's pretty incredible. I don't know why everyone's looking at me like I'm some kind of freak and all of a sudden. I played the game. Did I do something wrong? Is that not how you play the game?

Did I misunderstand the game? You didn't do anything wrong. You should win a Guinness World Record for that. That's pretty incredible. Got it. We're just wondering about your health. I guess we just want to make sure we're not liable for anything that were to come of any health concerns from you playing this game for 48 hours straight without stopping. Yeah, right, right.

So how are you feeling? Sorry? You're not going to take me anywhere, are you? No, we're not. We're worried about us. And I don't mean that to sound harsh. We're more concerned about us. Okay, ask your questions.

Are you feeling faint at all? Not really. Not really or no? No, I guess. Jesus. Okay, have you eaten anything in the 48 hours since you started playing the bop-it? You know Nutri-Grain bars? Yes.

Had three. Okay, that's not nearly enough calories to sustain you for two whole days um did you have any kind of falls yes shit shit shit shit um uh shit i shit for you shit for you yes i'm so sorry i fell on the stairs twice my god because i was trying to bop it while i while I walked down the stairs. And before I knew it, I was on the floor. But you were still bopping it.

Yeah, I mean, you have a decent amount of time in between commands. Again, it's not a hard game. I guess my only question is... In terms of its durability, it's a very strong machine. I'd love to know what you guys have made this thing.

It's a diamond tub, but it's not hard in terms of difficulty. I guess what I'm wondering is you're not planning on taking any legal action against us or Hasbro or Mr. Daniels, are you? Of course not. I love you guys. Oh, that's so great to hear, Trish. You have no idea how relieved we are. Okay, well, Julie, Julie, how did you enjoy the Bop-It? That's so great to hear, Trish. You have no idea how relieved we are. Okay, well, Julie, Julie, how did you enjoy the Bop It?

Oh, I thought it was marvelous. I'm so glad to hear that. Right, right. Mine was spectacular, actually. I guess one thing. Yeah. Well, when I was listening... When I was just listening to her talk about her experience with the Bop-It... Sure.

Um, I guess it made me realize that... That I fell a couple times while I was using mine. It made you realize that you fell? You know, now that she says that... No, no, no she says that no no no no no no no no no i think we might be on i think we might be on to something here now that you're talking about it no i had forgot no one can remember i had forgot no i'm serious when i was playing with it with my my brother-in-law he i remember watching him i don't care who you were playing with it with my brother-in-law, I remember watching him take quite a tumble. He took quite a tumble.

A news article comes out. Bop it recalled as 500 million players sue for physical damages. Fall related. Fall related damages from the... CDC is like, we're not sure how to say this, but this game is recalled because it makes you fall a lot. The game makes you fall. Fall.

Should we do our last segment? Yeah. This is the only moment. Hey Riley. Alfred. How are you? What's shaking me?

Sorry, what's shaking you? What's shaking me is not something I've've done but something that i haven't done that i should have paid your taxes in three years that's one of them but that's not what i'm talking about today i haven't had any cadbury mini eggs no and that's crazy to me that i bought a whole bag i think recording, I need to go out and get a bag because it is springtime. They're so good. They're the best. They are the single best Easter candy far and away. And I would say they might be the single best seasonal candy.

I think you can say that with your chest. I think they are single best seasonal candy. I think they are. I think you can say that with your chest. I mean, I mean, look, I'm not a candy corn hater, but candy corn ain't got shit. No, Cadbury's mini eggs.

No, Cadbury mini eggs are, are top of the pops. They are elite. They are the thing. Um, so I guess what's intriguing me is that, is that I haven't had one yet this holiday season.

And I need to go out and get some. I ate a whole bag in about 48 hours. It's so good. They were delish. I love those fucking things. What's shaking you, bitch? I'm cussing again. Oh, I hate it when you start cussing again.

Start cussing again. What's been shaking me? Are you familiar with the reality television program alone i have never seen it but i have heard of it i love the reality television program alone i just watched the ninth season uh over the course of about a week and it was so effing good um i still have one episode left. No spoilers. I will finish it years ago by the time this comes out. And it's just so good. So basically, for those who don't know, the premise of the television program alone is they take a group of 10 people and they strand them alone.

Separately, yeah. Labrador, Alaska this season. Or, I'm sorry, Labrador, newfoundland in canada this season sometimes it's in alaska and they literally are zero contact with another human being for sometimes as much as a hundred days of living in the wilderness and they're all like people who are obsessed with survivalism and like you know all of this like living off the land stuff and they just will like hunt deer and like grouse and they just like make these little shelter and it's just like it's so impressive and you like see people start to absolutely lose it and they have to film themselves the whole time

oh they film themselves yeah because there's no camera crew they're literally they are alone and so they like have is that legal they have like a bunch of cameras and like GoPros and stuff. And so it's just you, it's just, you're watching a documentary about people's sort of descent into madness. And isn't it, it's like who can last the longest, but you don't know if other people have dropped out or not. Yes. So it's like, it's Hunger Games style where it's like.

That's awful. But you don't, you don't find out when others, so it's like. You just find out at the end. You don't know if... When you're the last person left, they show up and they're like, congrats, you made it. You were the last person left. But until that happens, you don't know if it's you and one other person left

competing against each other or if it's you and nine other people. And so what you end up with is people who've been out there for like 70 days. They're starving, literally starving, like medically not well. And they're like. Do they get medical checkups? Yeah. So after a certain point, every two weeks, someone comes out and like checks their vitals and weighs them. And they get pulled for medical reasons a lot because they start starving to death.

Sure. It is so wild. That is awful. And you get people being like, maybe i just need to make it one more day i haven't eaten in three weeks but maybe i just need to make it one more day and it's like so upsetting but also so fascinating and also sometimes people like are out there for like a week and they're like you know what fuck this i don't know what i was like running from or whatever but i miss my girl there's literally a guy on this season,

spoiler alert, who on the, like on the first episode, after like two weeks, he's like, you know what? I miss my girlfriend and I miss my dog and I have a really great life. And I don't know why I'm doing this.

It's like, yeah, if I make it the longest, I win half a million dollars. But at the end of the day, I don't want to do this. And it's like, not worth it.

It's really interesting to see like the people you think aren't going to last last like i just i couldn't recommend the show enough that is crazy i also started re-watching the real housewives of salt lake city last night so thank god oh amazing um well you can find alfred on instagram at alfred in it you can find the show on instagram at review review on reddit r slash review review and review review discord with head gum yeah and if you were wondering where you can find miss riley anspaugh i know you are wondering and you are wondering you can find her on instagram.com just the web browser not the phone app at riley anspaugh and on twitter.com for as long as it lasts at riley coyote and as we say every single episode literally every single i wish we could change it but we signed up for this

we have to say it every week it's in writing at at at at at at

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Adam Bombs. Bye. Bye. That was a Hiddem Original.