Review Revue - Improv Theatres

Episode Date: October 15, 2024

How bad can an improv show make you feel? Can comedy be funny without being raunchy or including political bias? Are you Nicolas Cage? Alf and Reilly give conclusive answers to all of these questions and more in this episode!>>>>><<<<<Follow at:IG: @reillyanspaugh @alfredinnitTwitter: @reilecoyote Join the discord here!Produced by Grace Harper @chorlesborkleyAdvertise on Review Revue via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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My name is Riley Anspaugh, and this is my What Shook Me. When I see Sonic the Hedgehog, I become so very thirsty. My brain, it has just one flaw. It's furry little creatures, be it cat or mouse or dog. I just love their furry features. I'm a furry, and I'm'm proud I want to scream it now aloud I'm a furry and I'm proud I want from Sonic to be plowed

They look so sweet and cute I don't know what to say To me they are such cutes I want to carnally lay I'm a furry and I'm proud, I won't hide no more in the crowd I don't care whether it's allowed Please Sonic, please Julian, please Roger or the devil Be my furry, playmate and leave me so, oh, disheveled.

Oh, fuck. So there's another like minute and a half. I mean, it doesn't sound anything like you. I'm a furry and I'm proud. So I will say. But it's really Really The lyrics on that Are fucking impeccable That was Who sent that in?

Who sent that in? So this is from Lauren Mintz Oh yeah yeah yeah It says Theme song submission By Riley Antspot Yes

Riley Antspot No Hey you crazy cats Lauren Mintz here I found this old song On my computer Gave it a listen To my surprise

It seems to be a confession Written and performed By Riley herself Sounds a bit drunk In this song But other than that It seemed pretty interesting So I To my surprise, it seems to be a confession written and performed by Riley herself. Sounds a bit drunk in this song, but other than that, it seemed pretty interesting, so I thought I'd send it over. Jokes aside, obviously, this was created using an AI tool called Suno.

Hope you guys enjoyed. It's called The Furry Queen. Plugging the AI tool? That was really... I picked that theme song because I was like, theme song by Riley Anspaugh. Yes, Riley Anspaugh. That's interesting, because I didn't make a theme song. You was like theme song by Riley Anspaugh yes Riley Anspaugh that's interesting because I didn't make a theme song you're so vain you probably think this song

was by you was by written and sung by you there are parts of it that I'm like oh I can hear that especially there's something I may or may not have laryngitis right now whatever went to Disneyland screamed my little head off and now I lost my voice so there's part of that right now

where I'm like, there's part of it. You're a piece of shit. But there's part of that where it kind of doesn't not sound like me. I have to say, you sound more like it right now than you do normally.

I know. Because my throat is all, my throat's not sore, guys, in case you're wondering. Whatever. Thank you, Lauren, for that really upsetting rendition of a song that I didn't write or sing.

Alf, it feels weird. This is the first time we've gone two weeks without recording. Well, that's not true. That's not true. We've gone months without recording. But like while we're on a normal, like while we're home and on a schedule. We were on a break. How have your two weeks been?

Did you miss me at all? I missed you so much because we haven't, of course, spoken at any point in these last two weeks. Certainly not daily. What are you sipping on there? What that big tea for your throat a little 5 50 p.m coffee no that can't be that's huge that is an enormous not it's actually not it's scale oh it's perspective it's perspective it's quite small actually next to your massive head well oh it looks so big as it's next to the camera. You're such an asshole. Whoa, it looks... Whoa, it's so crazy

when it's closer to camera. It's big, and then when you move it back, it's small. You're such a piece of shit, man. You're such a piece of shit. I got a tattoo. Oh, what's new?

She has a tattoo. I got a tattoo. Look at it. How do you feel about it? I already want my second one. I was texting my artist, and I'm going to get my second one in like November or December. What is it going to be, the second one? I'm texting my artist and I'm going to get my second one in like November or December.

What is it going to be? The second one? Not telling you. Oh, sorry. I'm not going to tell you. My bad. That's a really personal invasive question, actually. I don't think it is at all.

I actually can't believe you'd ask me that. Oh, really? That's really personal. Oh, fuck. My bad, man. I'm sorry. I love my tattoo. Hey, no, no, no.

I'm really sorry about what I asked earlier. Thank you. No, thanks. Where are you getting it? Is that okay to ask? Yeah, that's okay. I love my tattoo Hey no no no I'm really sorry About what I asked earlier Thank you No thanks Where are you getting it? Is that okay to ask? Yeah that's okay Like a tiny one On the back of my right bicep

My first one right now It's like It's a week and a half healed And it's just at the stage Where it's like scabbing And like the ink is flaking off It's weird My friend Annie was like It's gonna look It's like cool now On day one And then it's like scabbing and like the ink is flaking off it's weird my friend annie was like

it's gonna look it's like cool now on day one and then it's gonna look real fucked up and then it's gonna look even more fucked up then it's gonna look normal again it's funny how that works it's funny how that works what's new with you you sounded so oh it's funny how that works your your insecurity is palpable about what about your about your voice and about how i'm so cool what i'm okay man i'll be honest with you i um i made an apple crisp you familiar and i eat too much of it he got a little upset tummy i'm full i'm brimming with the stuff ew i'm absolutely chocobob lock full of the crisp chocoblob block full of the crisp yeah it's delicious i i i can't recommend it enough. If you're like, I want a little fall treat. I'm going to bake something. You bang it.

You can bang an apple crisp out in about 15 minutes. They're easy. Really? Easy as cheese. I mean, it's really, it's one of the easier desserts. So I have to recommend it. Easy as cheese. Have you watched any of this season of Bake Off?

No, not yet. I've been waiting. Daniel's been traveling for two months and he's home now and so I've been waiting for him because we love watching Bake Off together. There's a woman on it. I've only watched

the first two, I think. There's a woman on it I'm absolutely obsessed with. I want to, like, be her best friend. Oh. Okay. What does that mean?

Why are you responding like that? That's insane. No, it's just, it's just like, I thought you already had one a best friend oh i see yeah well so i don't know i think i can have multiple oh so then what's the point of adding adding best on there well i you know i because then it's like oh then that's just a friend this is a good good but a really good one yeah but you it's clear that good i mean i'm not gonna meet her right

i'm not gonna meet nelly from bake off she's she's she lives in the uk then it just makes it seem like that it's like that you're you're lacking something well i'm no my life is full and beautiful i it's just she's awesome and i wanted to hang out with her she's what am i not providing for you i guess like in that role i mean you can't just have one friend right i'm not saying that okay so i just want another friend nelly from season 15 no you said you want to be her best friend well yeah i but i didn't say i want her to be my best friend i said i want to be her best friend so okay there's still room for me to have someone else as my best friend what do you mean there's still room i'm still looking

what the fuck this episode's brought to you by best fiends you remember that remember that oh my god best fiends fuck my voice is so tired i know i'm concerned do you think you're gonna be able to do improv with a voice like that of course and that's actually such a great i want to segue from uh you saying do you think no you wanted to talk about your urgent care thing also my urgent care was like don't talk very much and you were like like, ah, cream gas on my podcast. Speaking of doing improv. Fucking hell. Do you feel like it's unraveling here towards the end?

We're getting too meta with it. No, I don't. No, I don't. You're a fucking asshole. Fight me. I, at the time of recording today Tuesday October 8th I posed a little question to

Review Review subreddit. I said guys we're dwindling in episode numbers. Discord. Oh I meant Discord. Sorry. I posed a little question to the Review Review Discord. I posed a little question to the Review Review Discord. And I said guys we're recording today. What do you want to hear? What do you want to hear?

What do you want to hear? What did you even want to hear from us today? And our friend Jenna said improv theaters. Oh, I heard improv theaters. I heard improv theaters. We're doing improv theaters today. That was you getting a suggestion? Yes, I thought it was very clever.

Oh, yeah. Should we do a quick role play where you'll be like, can I get a suggestion? Hey, all right, guys. We are Flim Flam. We are here today to make you laugh and giggle. We're going to start by taking a suggestion from the audience. Any suggestions? Improv sucks.

Improv sucks. Improv sucks. Improv. Improv. Something with improv. That makes me think of improv theaters. Oh, my God. Your mom's ass. Your mom's ass.

Your mom's big hairy ass. Ralph, talk to me about improv theaters. Well, boy, howdy. I've spent a lot of time in improv theaters in my long life. And there's something beautiful about them. They are an incredibly smelly place. I think I'll say that. I've never been in an improv theater.

That's not true. I have been in an improv theater that smelled good. And it was when they reopened IO in Chicago at a new location. So it hadn't been used. And it smelled good for about a week. And then it started to smell like sweat and beer again. I don't know why I left the smell. It's just like very palpable to me.

Yeah, that was really interesting. Improv theaters do tend to smell bad. Why? Because improvisers tend to smell bad, right? They're not the most washed people and improvisers are washed up tea hey some of the improvisers on this podcast are washed up mama okay but no i mean i think the thing about an improv theater is that like they're very they tend to be run on very tight budgets, right? Yes.

As a result, there is a kind of, shall we say, rustic charm. Absolutely. Rustic charm for sure. You know, there's a urinal that's been broken for the better part of nine months. Again, I'm not adding the Iowa Theater in Chicago, but Jesus Christ, fix that urinal. It's been nine months. But yeah, you know and and i'm excited to i'm excited to let loose here today um i'm excited to talk about it candidly um you just did you said

it smells like shit and no it smells like sweat and beer but also the bathroom smell like piss because everyone's pissing yeah i don't think I've been to like a proper improv theater. Okay, brag. No, in a long time. I mean, it's like I've been to a couple shows at UCB in Los Angeles, and yes, they all do have a certain smell, and it's that mixed with beer. Pretty cramped.

Yes, always. Shit chairs. Shit chairs. They're not big. They're shit chairs. Empty, let's be be honest most of the time i've never been to an improv theater where my shows but like where there's like a drink minimum yeah um at least the ones in la it's like i if i'm seeing a show or i guess groundlings i i see like the sketch shows at grounding so that's not the same but i feel like

a lot of time the drink minimum is like a hold over From like old comedy clubs Like it's Yeah You do get it still And it's strange Well I feel like that's more Of like stand up cases Yeah

I see Yeah But improv theaters Which suck To be clear Which sucks As a sober person It sucks

Totally To be like Yes three diet Dr. Peppers Please I'm going to go insane I'm about to be The worst audience member anyone's ever had because i'm basically going to be pissing every three minutes from the inside and pissing myself i've got heartburn so bad i think i might die uh daniel and i talk about how an improv show at an improv theater is like, is a really risky first date or like first one or two dates.

Yeah, I wouldn't. Because either it's really good and then it's like, oh, wow, that was so great. That was so funny. And then what else do you talk about after you're sitting in silence and watching improv or it's really bad and it's like oh well oh no usually there's so now it was a good idea no it was fun i'm gonna i'm gonna say i agree with you but i will say i have had like i think if it's another comedy person or another improviser and not necessarily a date, but like, just if you're hanging out with somebody you've never really hung out before. And but you're like, we have a similar comedy vibe and you go and see an improv show and it's truly abhorrent, truly, truly terrible. That in itself can be a bonding experience, sort of a trial by fire.

And you're like, totally sitting there going, oh my God, I wonder if this person finds this as unwatchable as I do. And then afterwards you get the kind of like, holy fucking shit, could you believe when that person said that? A hundred percent. But if you're on a date and then it's like you don't know their sense of humor really yet, then it's like, can we bond over this?

Or is it just like, oh. You know what's even a worst uh first date idea having somebody come to see your improv show and that feels so demented and diabolical i've never done it i want to say that on record i never once wouldn't ever do that but i have seen it done i went on a first date to an improv show to where they were performing no oh no i mean that if people do that it is unique to be like come to my show yeah we'll hang out after we're gonna beer at the bar and i think people think it's gonna be like you're gonna see me in my element and like i'm gonna look so cool and it's just it's just shit it's just shit. Yeah, that's really bizarre. Yeah.

Again, I don't do that. I've never done that. But people do it. I think the intention today is, can we be honest? Because I feel like you have done that. I feel like the intention is I want some honesty. Yeah, I've never done that. I'm going to be honest about that.

I've never done that. And this is me being honest. I could have just had this intention. This is going to be the most honest episode. Okay, well, it feels like that was a very accusatory way of saying honest. Doing improv theaters. This is a very honest episode. We're being very honest here.

What do you think are the top three worst first date locations? I think that like are within reason. I think improv theater is up there. Yeah, I would say improv is up there. You know what's shit? And this is, people don't really do this, but like bowling or anything, any kind of activity where it's like you're taking turns like that is weird. Ooh, that's a good call.

You know what I mean? Yeah, because it's so much time spent. Let me go throw my axe and now you're going to, again, I don't. It's all in passing. Yeah. Something you're doing something together is nice, but not like. Right. Now you go, then I'm up, then you're up.

Because then it's a lot of like, oh, sorry, I'll take this. Yeah. And so we were, oh, no, sorry, it's re-racked. It's your turn. I'll tell you when you sit down. That's your ball. And third one, I guess, would be. Yeah.

You got this. God, I don't know urgent care like i was just out that okay with your with your high grade fever it's low grade it's 99 i googled it and that's nothing i googled it and it's nothing it's low grade no it's literally no grade bitch bitch i'm gonna do this we can all hurl insults okay nope we can do this we're supposed to be recording a podcast man is 99.1 a low grade fever that's a leading question your honor she's leading the witness yes it is okay hold on what is considered a low grade fever. Your honor. This is great audio.

This is a great podcast. A body temperature between 99.1 and 100.4. I mean, but at that point, but at that point, no, that's shit. That's shit. Go fuck yourself. We'll be right back with Improv Feeder Reviews.

My body temperature is always that. And we're back. I don't think my body temperature has been lower than 99.5 in years. Then you are constantly battling an illness. Maybe. Do you want to start or should I? I'd love to start. Great. Oh, start with my review, you mean?

Yeah. I thought you meant start my airplane engine. I'm trying something new. This is... I'm trying something bad. I'm trying something bad. This is for the Backline Comedy Theater in Omaha, Nebraska. Okay.

It's going to go ahead and be one star. Oh, shit. From JJ. From Jack Johnson. Okay, really buckle up for this one Shit Taking place on a stage Decorated by Dracula

Watch the same 20 people Tell the same jokes They've literally been telling badly For the last five years Admission might be free But when it's over You will have lost an irretrievable part of your soul. Have you ever contemplated suicide?

You will at the back line. Oh my god. Unless you pay for improv classes from the woman who once paid for UCB classes during her summer in LA, be prepared to wait three hours to go on and expect the MC to interrupt your set and yell at you when you hit on his girlfriend. If you're looking for something else to do on a Wednesday night, you could always jump off another building in Omaha. And he sort of goes on. And the pain is over, which is so much better than three hours of suffering through what appears to be a vampire's cult's serious attempt at entertainment. So, deranged. Truly deranged.

But then, of course, the Batglam Theater does respond. Oh, I have so many questions. Dracula here. What? You showed up to an open mic late So you went last Then instead of telling jokes You decided to walk over and hit on the woman running lights and sound Oh my god She told you to stop

You tried to do it a second time And the host told you to stop And just stay on the stage You're mad because people were making fun of You got a lot more laughs than you did we have a video of your performance if you don't remember it oh my god that's a hall of fame review right there like just just such an aggressive weird like trying so hard to be funny, making several different jokes about suicide, falling completely flat. And then the theater responding and just being like.

Bodying him. You're an anointing creep that nobody likes. Listen, man, we can play the video for you if you want, but that's not going to change the fact that you are barred from this establishment. Let's all watch the video and you can point exactly to me what I did wrong. I don't know what it's going to change. It's just going to be embarrassing for you. It's going to be a waste of time for us. We have to set up for the 7 p.m. show.

I'm not embarrassed about my material. You should be. At least I'm not. You should be embarrassed by your material. Okay. Yeah. Maybe my stuff's not as polished, but that's because I'm bringing new stuff to the open mic, right? Not polished. It's offensive and poorly timed. Oh my god. Offensive, poorly timed.

And it wasn't even that it was like the material, your material, whatever. Let's just play it. Just play it. Here we go. Please welcome to the stage Kris Jenner! No relation. No relation No relation Thanks for introducing me man Yeah everybody My name's not Chris Jenner It's

It's Doug Emhoff The first gentleman Or the second gentleman You know who that is Well you didn't laugh Wasn't funny Everyone laughs at that

Alright What about old Nicholas Cage over there in the lighting booth Cause she's got some long legs Okay So obviously That was funny Obviously that was funny man tell me that wasn't funny look me in the eye and tell me that wasn't funny it was inappropriate it was inappropriate and

comedy's not allowed to push boundaries anymore no it wasn't about pushing boundaries you were like harassing one of the john belushi John Belushi had said that, you would have pissed your pants. That's not true. So what happened was obviously you came out. You made a weird joke. Your name is Kris Jenner. And I know there's no relation, but you can't get mad at me for saying your name. I wasn't mad at you.

I was bantering with you, bantering with the host. That's kind of a open mic classic. It wasn't a yes and you came out and said, no, that's not my name. And you said your name was Doug Emhoff. Because he's the second gentleman. That's not a joke. Yeah. Again, it's new material.

I am workshopping it. Okay. Okay. Well, obviously the big, the most egregious part. What was egregious? Well, it was you hitting on our lighting designer. I think what the most. I couldn't even see her.

She was sitting behind a table. That's why it was funny. I was talking about her legs. What seemed like it set you off is when the dude in the audience said that's not fun, like wasn't funny and then people laughed at that.

You could see in the video that there was a glint in your eye that you're like, that's when you got mad and then that's when you hit on the lighting designer. I didn't hit on her. I couldn't see her legs.

Let's keep watching. Boo. Boo. We don't like that kind of stuff. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize, um, I didn't realize I was on the Senate floor. Crickets.

Someone says that. Oh my god. That doesn't even make sense. That doesn't even make sense. Um. This is great stuff, dude. Alright. I'm gonna, I going to fucking scream. Okay.

Yeah, I started to lose it a little bit there. But he was really heckling. Do you guys, like, are okay with that behavior at your shows? Not normally, no. You wouldn't have a security help a guy out with that? That was security. Oh, fuck. Press play.

You want to fight me, man? Oh, you you want to fight me man oh you're big oh shit you're big please don't come up here i don't want to fight you dude i just want you to make me laugh had a tough day and right now i don't need this clown in this circus holy shit are you nicholas are you nicholas cage what are you nicholas cage what do you mean because you because you're knowing me because you knowing me remember knowing the move the nicholas cage movie knowing do you guys remember that can we stop watching can we stop watching guys i feel even at the worst part i know i i don't remember any of this really really really at at all. I don't want to see any. I can fast forward.

This is where you push the stool over and then you broke off one of the legs. And it was kind of a joking thing of like, oh, I'm going to stab myself in the throat with this winter chair. It was like a Dracula thing. Yeah, because then you were like, oh, would you all like to suck my blood like you're sucking the life out of my performance? I remember that line. Honestly, it's one of my better ones. We're going to skip past that. Here we go. This is probably the most egregious part of you're sucking the life out of my performance. I remember that line. That honestly is one of my better ones. We're going to skip past that. Here we go.

This is probably the most egregious part of you hitting on the lighting designer. Oh my God. Why is all that stuff on stage? The stage is covered in like a little bit of blood. Just like all this chipped wood. Sir, can you please, we're done with your set. I've been shining the light for five minutes What are you Nicolas Cage

Don't say the long legs thing again Cause you're ghost riding my ass Big bouncer gets up You're ghost riding my ass That doesn't even make any sense What Look man I couldn't hear her

When I said what I could not hear her That wasn't the issue They were trying so hard to play me off They were blasting that music Can you not see why I couldn't hear her. When I said what, I could not hear her. That wasn't the issue. They were trying so hard to play me off. They were blasting that music. Can you not see why? I could start to see why now. You just said you don't remember.

You didn't want to keep watching and you blacked out. Yeah. And so now on a rewatch, I could see that maybe my behavior was kind of, you know, approaching inappropriate. It was extremely appropriate. So we're not going to give you a refund for entering in the show and you are still banned from the establishment. Do we need to keep having this conversation?

This is bullshit. Sorry you feel that way. Are you Nicolas Cage? Oh my God. Because you're a fucking pig. The Nicolas Cage movie, Pig. Bouncer walks in from the bar i'm going i'm going my renfield is moonstruck about this one are we about to have a face off oh machi machi are we

raising arizona in here or what uh this is the unbearable likeness of wait fuck what was it called nobody remembers that movie i'll do a review okay if i dare this is for impro theater in los ang Angeles Was that like a Halloween thing? Or when you said if I dare If I dare There was something kind of Crypt Keeper about that This is Impro Theater in LA Five stars from Doll W

Um Doll Doll Doll Doll Doll Doll Doll Any day love right now that's enough from you doll doll doll doll doll we parton doll we parton doll we parton i don't think i'm having fun at this dolly parton concert i think i'm having a lot of fun at this doll I don't think I'm having fun at this Dahlwee Parton concert. I think I'm having a lot of fun at this Dahlwee Parton concert. I think I'm having a lot of jo-ween at this.

Five stars. Five stars. From Dahlwee Parton. Dahlwee Parton. Full length plays improvised. Wow. Jesus fucking Christ. I actually had to see it to believe it.

This isn't like anything else I've ever seen in Los Angeles. Yes, it can be funny. But when has an improviser at UCB or the former I.O. West made you want to cry, parentheses, in a good way? Wow. And when they perform genres like Star Trek, it's not a gimmick. What?

Or even ironic for the sake of a cheap laugh. They're exploring the same themes that were the season Rodenberry, that were the reason Rodenberry created the show in the first place. Wow. Did I say that already? Fans of live theater and fans of improvisation should all drop what

they are doing and run to check out this place because it is unlike anything else out there. Jesus wept. What has your improv teacher made you want to cry? In a good way. I just, I don't want to shit on it because I'm sure it's good. You know what I mean?

I'm sure the people performing in that are doing a good job but at the same time every improviser has an off day right sure every improv show every improv team cast whatever they have bad shows absolutely have a bad scene your average improv show if you have a bad scene or team has a bad performance you're looking at well there goes five minutes of kind of shit comedy right yeah the idea of the fear that i would feel of being on stage being five minutes in to a 90 minute piece. And you feel they're like, this is the energy is off. Oh, this is nothing. This is nothing.

This is nothing. We made some choices in the first five minutes, which have made it impossible to get back. This is nothing. We are going to be fighting for our lives for the next 80 minutes. Yeah. And that I'm sweating just thinking about it. Okay, ladies and the, we'll call

The Bookkeeper's Mistress. Okay. All right. Here we go. The Bookkeeper's Mistress, The Bookkeeper's Mistress. Oh, that was my suggestion. I can't wait. I love theater. Oh, I saw the show last week. It was so good. Whoa, did you see the serpentine tongue? Yes, I cried my ass off. It was so moving. Like, the way that they could do dramatic improv, like, for 90 minutes was crazy. They really captured the themes that Roddenberry was going for in the original show. I really hope that tonight's dramatic improv is, like, bittersweet, but also makes me laugh a little bit. Yeah, I mean, Bookkeeper's Mistress. Bookkeeper's Mistress. That could go anywhere. oh they're starting they're starting

uh hello oh well they're already messing up they just started christ hello governor hello to you governor got me books what's that sorry got me books you've got i got your books i got your books right oh i do i got your books i'll ring them up for you quite a selection what's kept them safe kept him safe kept him safe you're the bookkeeper are you not you kept my books safe did you not? I did keep them safe. I did keep them safe. I kept... I need to get out of here, man.

I'm starting to itch all over. This is awful. They just started. Maybe they'll find it. Come on, missus. Give us a... Give us a big... Give us a big kiss as well.

As well. As well. Oh, sir, you know I'm a married married woman i'd never give you a kiss if my life depended on it but well the husband isn't at home so maybe just one peck come here kinky holy shit holy shit guys no i'm freaking out i think I'm having a panic attack. I haven't had a panic attack in years. We can't leave. It's awful. My boyfriend's daughter is the stage manager.

We can't leave. I cannot stay. Oh, my God. Okay. I'm going to get a drink. I'm going to get a drink. No, no, no. You can't stand up.

You can't stand up. I have to go to the bar. You can't. You can't. You can't. Okay. Maybe I'll flag down one of the waiters, maybe. Sit down.

Okay. I'm sitting. Oh, well, I can only give you a cheeky kiss if you buy another book. One book, one kiss. Them's the rules, naughty boy. Oh, kinky. Oh, kinky, you've got me up for a trick. One pack and a book, please, ma'am.

Ma'am. I feel like his accent is changing. I do declare, I need a little bit of buttermilk. Oh, oh, look, oh, no, here's my husband. Coming in from around these. He's coming inside. What are you doing with my daughter?

Why did you say daughter? Oh, did I forget to tell you you kinky boy that this is also my dad? Also her dad? That's so fucked up I want to kill myself

I can't I swear to god I'm gonna put my airpods in Do you think they're gonna notice? I have to put my airpods in My boyfriend's daughter is a stageway to dream You can't do that Jesus Christ I should never have agreed to come to this

Oh my dad Is gonna mess you up, you little cowpoke. Oh, look who it is. The little guy. What? You're here to make my kinky. Jesus Christ, I swear to God God my skin is on fire I'm gonna end it all

I'm gonna end it all This is unfair I'm gonna eat one of my airpods I'm gonna eat my glass I have to go to the hospital Both of you kinkies need to stop it right now What's gonna happen is this You hear

I'm gonna sell a book And a kiss to this here man. And then I'm going to be walking into the street and see who else wants a piece. Wow, she is so modern. Yes, I love her so much. What the fuck? She was my Sherry in the war. What the fuck? She was my sherry in the war. In the war? Sherry in the war.

She was my sherry in the war. What does that even mean? Oh, no. Here comes more trouble. It's my naughty. It's her naughty sister. Hello, you little pieces of pot pie. I told you to stay in the cellar.

No one can put baby in a cellar because baby will bust right out with my super strength. Whoa, whoa. No, they've introduced superpowers. They've introduced superpowers into the world. Lucky for you, Papa can go invisible. Well, actually, that trick doesn't make any sense Lucky for you, Papa can go invisible. Actually, that trick doesn't make any sense because I have the thing where I can see invisible things and people, Kinky.

Well, baby doll, don't you know that I have a fire breath? I'm going to fucking scream. I'm going to fucking lose it. gonna fucking lose it we're going we're going i don't care about your fucking boyfriend's daughter's stage man i don't give a shit i'm leaving no if you try to leave bad things will happen what do you mean bad things will happen just trust me you don't want to find out i'm fucking going i can't take this anymore. The spotlight turns. The media hits. Oh! Oh! Is there a kinky in the audience? Oh, there's a kinky here.

Are you looking to leave us? Time for a little peck and a slap on the bum if you try to escape. You're going to get some of my buttermilk biscuits. My buttermilk biscuits, too. No, you guys, I'm just going to the bar. I'm coming back, I swear. I told you, I told you. I swear I'm coming back. I'm coming back, I just need to go to the bar.

I'm just going to grab a drink. Well, then let us come with you, Kinky. No, no, you guys stay up there on stage. You guys belong up there on stage in the show, right? Now you are part of the show, aren't you? What do you mean? No, no. Get up on stage, Kinky.

No, no, no, really, it's fine. I told you, dude, I tried to save you. I'm so sorry. No, please, guys, seriously, I just wanted a drink from the bar. I just wanted a drink from the bar. Oh, you'd like a drink from the bar? Well, too bad, because you don't have the superpower that allows you to drink. You're all dried up. Oh, no.

I've realized he is secretly Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Come on. Seriously, don't make me do that. That's a crazy impression. I can't do that. You are RFK Jr. What are you talking about, RFK? Won't you play with us, RFK?

Dude, you have to. The show's not going to end unless you join in this act. I was going to. Is it okay to do the voice? I don't know if it's okay to do the voice. It doesn't matter because they're all doing insane things. I know, but he says he got the voice from the vaccine, which I don't believe, but that's seriously

what he said. Just run with it. I was just going to the bar, guys. Oh, a little kinky bar for the guy. Not kinky. No kinky. But actually, he says... Happily married to Cheryl Hines. To Sherry from the war.

No, Cheryl Hines. To Sher war. No, Cheryl Hines. To Sherry from the war. And that is our show, everybody. The Bookkeeper's Mistress. Thank you guys so much for coming. This has been such a blast. What the fuck is wrong with you? And you guys are the only audience ever

who will have seen the performance of The Bookkeeper's Mistress. I want a refund. A big round of applause for, what was your name? Jack. Jack. Jack! Leaving the theater.

Jack, are you okay? I feel like shit. I feel like shit. I'm so sorry. I was so bad up there. I tried to warn you. I was so bad as RFK. No, dude, wait, what?

No. I let them all down. What? No, you didn't. I let Papa and Kinky down. Stop it. No. I was supposed to be.

Jack, snap out of it, Jack. I was supposed to be. No, Jack, snap out of it, Jack. I was supposed to be there, Bobby. Snap out of it, Jack. You're not part of the show. Kinky. No. Kinky. Jack, please.

I can't lose you. Please. Kinky. I've already lost my boyfriend's daughter as the stage manager. I can't lose you. Kinky book. Oh, no. Give us a kiss.

Give us a kiss, Kinky book. I have to put you out of your misery. What do you mean? Boo, boo, boo, boo, boo? I have to put you out of your misery. What do you mean, Boo Boo Boo Boo Boo? I have to push you off of the tallest building in Omaha. It'll only take three seconds before you hit the pavement and it'll feel a lot better than the hell you're in now. Boo Boo, no. Push.

Kinky. Jesus fucking Christ. Sometimes we do a scene and I feel older at the end of it. You have time for one quick one? I do have a time for a quick one if you've got time for a quick one. Do you have one and you want me to do it? I'm happy either way, whatever you'd like. Why don't I go then?

Okay. This is for Go Comedy Improv Theatre in Detroit, Michigan. Okay, I believe you. One star from Crystal H. Crystal Hexagon. Crystal Hexagon, one star. We were looking forward to a night of laughs with our friends. Unfortunately, this did not happen. It seems that this venue

doesn't think comedy can be funny without being raunchy or involving political bias. What's worse is that this show ended with the performer blaspheming Jesus. Oh my god. I understand that we're all different and don't believe the same way, but I also feel like there should be a level of mutual respect for topics people have strong beliefs on. It's very unfortunate. I've been to many shows that are hilarious without the vulgarity. We won't be back.

What's your stance on clean humor? My personal stance? Yeah. I think if you can be funny without swearing and without being dirty, then you don't have to label yourself a clean comic. You know what I mean? You're just funny. Yeah. Right.

But if you have to go around and be like, this is the way that I'm differentiating myself. That's really interesting. It's a little weird to me because I'm like, yeah, there are actually a shocking number of comedians who don't really swear or talk about, you know, their blue balls. Yeah, that's really interesting. I can think of a lot of comedians who are very funny and are clean.

They're not like, I'm a clean comic. But they're not like, I'm a clean comic. You know what I mean? Just something to think about about and when it comes to blaspheming jesus um i would say that comment really made me realize that 99 of improv shows have some sort of jesus bit in them i hear you yeah um you saw my set i kind of wrote out some jokes for you and you said, I have some quick notes, won't take long, come into my office. Thank you for coming. Of course.

Thank you for taking the time. I respect you a lot as a stand-up teacher. Thank you. You know, I honestly, I started typing out an email and I was like, I don't know how to articulate this on the page, but once I'm in person, I'll know what to say, right? Yeah. So obviously these were the jokes to say. Right. Yeah. Um,

so obviously these were the jokes kind of about like my time in college and like all the crazy stuff I got up to. Totally, totally, totally. Um, which I think could be relatable for a lot of like, you know,

young women in their twenties and, and I think could be a fun. Totally. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Um, did this stuff really happen to you? Oh God, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Did this stuff really happen to you? Oh, God, no. No, no, no. Because, yeah, it doesn't need to have, right? Like, obviously, comedians, we can embellish. But some of this stuff, man, I was a little like, that's kind of why I wanted to talk to you.

It was a little concerning. No, it was like half of it did happen, and the other half, it's like, oh, but, you know, it's like, what's a heightened version of that. Right. Okay. Which is something that I learned from you. No, and I appreciate, I mean, you're honestly, you're one of the best students in the class.

I'll say that much. That means a lot, Mr. Green. Thank you. No, seriously, you're very, very, very good. And you have a lot of potential. Thank you. And you, frankly, you have a lot of drive. I can tell you're very motivated.

I do. I really have a lot of drive. I can tell you're very motivated. I do. I really care a lot about this. A lot of these stoner kids, to be blunt, who take my classes, they are. That's a funny pun to be blunt. It wasn't even intentional. They're very funny, but they don't have that drive. So I just want to start out and I say everything I say in here comes from a place of like really wanting to help you be better. Appreciate that.

So the stuff about accidentally killing your roommate in college. That whole section, I wasn't really seeing. The comedy in it? Funny. I wasn't seeing the funny. funny no and here's the thing and i guess i was wondering if that was in the half that was no no no that's because you said the half of it was real absolutely um and half of it wasn't that's a great note that you gave and just wondering if that's that's a really tricky part for me because it's like which i found that you know it's like for months every every month we would do like me checking to make sure I knew where her EpiPen was, God forbid, in case something happened.

And so I found that it's like, oh my God, when I actually couldn't find it, when I'd forgotten. Because whenever we do the check, I'd be like, yeah, kind of like, you know, when you're on an airplane. And this actually should write this in there. You know, when you're on an airplane and you're like, make sure you know where all the emergency exits and all that stuff. And you're kind of half-listened. It's like, I'll know what to do. Half listen.

So when the, exactly. So when the time came and I could tell she was, she was like, I need my EpiPen. And I'm like, oh shit, I actually didn't remember.

I found that that part was kind of boring of like me searching. And so that's a really helpful note because I didn't know how really to punch that up. So did you find it or? Cause the story in the show. No, that part was true. No, that part was true. I did not find it or? No, so that part was true.

No, that part was true. I could not find it. No, no, no. She died. She died. Okay, well, okay, okay, okay. I'm a little different than a lot of the kind of girls. I really like dark humor.

I love that. I really kind of like black humor. And I love that. And I think, and I, you know, I don't know if I agree. With dark humor? No, I mean, what you said just there, I'm't know if I agree, um, with dark humor. No,

I mean, you, what you said just there, I'm not like a lot of other women. Like, I don't know if the key to you standing out as a comic is by kind of tearing other women down like that. I'm not tearing other women down.

I'm just saying that it's like, I'm just different. No, totally. And you are different. Everyone has a unique voice. I just feel like if I were you, I would maybe take another pass at that section because it was giving confession. Okay.

Do you know what I mean by that? Yeah, I can so see how it was giving confession. It was giving kind of like, here's the bad thing I did I want to tell you about. Right? Kind of it was giving info dump. That's really interesting because it's like I feel like a lot of my kind of Catholic upbringing you're seeing from that of like, oh, here's confession. You could rope that into the show. I mean, that

would be really valuable, I think, into the show. Yeah. To tie that in. So I guess it's like it can be like the and then on October 15th, 2018 macy park okay again this died under my sounds like a written confession almost like an affidavit you think it sounds too written it needs to sound a little bit more like lived a little bit more like no i don't think it needs i i'm sorry i i'm really sorry i don't think i'm being clear you should cut this oh really but

it's one of my favorite parts I know but and you know kill all your little Darlings in your case not literally Is that weird can I make Jokes about it you can make jokes like I said I love Dark humor okay Yeah I just think Going straight from the

Kind of birthday party part That was really really funny really really solid And then after this you kind of, you have that whole thing about your ex and I'm like, just put those into each other, right? Cut the dead roommate stuff because it's really fucking bleak and awkward. And it makes people uncomfortable.

I've seen you do it a couple times and I hear you. It's just sometimes, like the thing is it makes me uncomfortable to see it and it makes the whole audience uncomfortable. I'm not afraid to like get people thinking. You lose them for the whole back after set. I'm not afraid to like get people thinking and get people uncomfortable. I'm completely whole audience uncomfortable. I'm not afraid to get people thinking. You lose them for the whole back half of the set. I'm not afraid to get people thinking and get people uncomfortable. You lose them. I'm not afraid to do that.

Right. And I know that you're not afraid because I've seen you do it three times. I'm not afraid because I killed a woman. Jesus Christ. Did you put the almonds in there? And so I am not afraid of it. Did you put the almonds in there? Did you put the almonds in her yogurt?

Unintentionally. How do you do that unintentionally walk me through it but i guess it makes me a murderer is what i would say in the piece that's the part that's untrue you are so close to being good oh it breaks my heart i've seen so many people like you i thought you said it was the best in your class you are and i've seen a lot of people like you who have exactly what it takes but they just have a fucking obsession with one thing it's like they're all their shows all their hours everything they fucking workshop they bring to me looks it's about as one shitty thing it's hard for me to not think about anything else other than this horrible thing I did that I feel like I haven't forgiven myself for. Okay.

Therapy. Therapy. Therapy. Therapy. And comedy is therapy. I've always said that. No, it is not. It is not.

It is not. This has been really, really helpful. Please, please, please. There's one piece of advice I can give you. It is to never talk about something on stage that you haven't fully processed in real therapy. Because comedy isn't therapy. The stage isn't therapy. That's not a healthy way to live. I never said it was healthy.

Okay. Should I go to the police? Oh, sorry. Is the title of my hour. I think that's a great title. Better than the suggestion I just gave. It should be date? Yeah, why not? I'm your teacher. We should absolutely have a relationship relationship there's nothing weird about that

let's do our last segment let's kick it this shook me all week long all week long I was shaking in my boots. My boots were quaking. My ass was shaking. My little shit came out and it was what shook me. All week long. Thong, thong, thong, thong. When I do the thong song, it's like a kind of aperitif. Digestif, that's the one. Keeping in tradition with things that Riley is a little bit late to

And just getting on board for And is really shaken by Baby Reindeer Baby Reindeer Fucked my shit up Who is that? What is that? Shut up

I genuinely don't know what that is You don't know what Baby Reindeer is? No I don't know what that is You don't know what Baby Reindeer is? Okay this is gaslighting No Baby Reindeer is? Okay, this is gaslighting. No, Baby Reindeer is a show on Netflix, and it is so fucking beautiful and tragic

and harrowing and messy and incredible and one of the most incredible pieces of art I've ever seen. It reignited my inspiration of being an artist and it is just so, I haven't stopped thinking about it. I haven't, I can't believe you,

you, oh my God, Alf, it's really incredible. Huh. Um, that's been shaking me. I binge it in two days.

It's all I could think about. I finished it and I just like, I was sitting there sobbing. My gosh. Like sobbing alone in my apartment. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it.

Baby Reindeer is incredible. And immediately like the lead actress won for best supporting actress in a miniseries, I think. And then the lead actor is also the writer and he won for writing. And it's a true story about his life. All of this really happened to him. Oh, wow. Talk about processing your trauma from real life events.

Talk about that. It's unbelievable. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. I feel honored to have watched it. Like, I mean that so sincerely. Oh, my God. It's like I cannot speak highly enough about it. Don't think I'll be watching that.

Looks a bit sad. Looks a bit too sad for me. What's been shaking your ass? i went to a concert yesterday i went to a concert of an artist and i was probably the youngest person in the room by about 30 years i would say who is the artist the artist is a man by the name of billy brag i was about to make some sea shanty joke and you already just did it for me he's a british um of course he's kind of straddles genre um sort of punk but also then eventually folk music uh musician you can say sea shanties. No, it's not sea shanties. He's very active in the minor strikes in the UK. Yep.

40 years ago, 40 year anniversary of the minor strikes this year. Not that they're talking about it a lot in the British media, though, which is telling, I think. Sorry, not to get political on the podcast, but it was a fantastic fucking show.

He is like the role model of what it is to be like truly kind of like radical and progressive politically in your art as a young person and then age well right like he has this song that came out in 1990 which is like his later period which um is all about like gay rights, right? Because it was 1990. It was middle of AIDS crisis. And I, you know, I'm familiar with the song and it's a little dated. And he sang it at the show and he'd like completely rewritten it to be about trans rights to make it topical.

Which you don't expect from British people. You expect British people to be extremely transphobic as a rule. And so I was just, I was very, like, genuinely, like, just like if every, like, man above the age of 60 was like that, the world would be an infinitely better place. That's really cool. And the show itself, his, like, voice sounds completely the same as it did 40

years ago um and like he's just a really great musician and a cool guy and i was like similarly i was like reaffirmed to be like optimistic about the world and how everything seems so fucking bleak and awful all the time and like ever the world is just an unsolvable nightmare and it made me feel like oh maybe it's not and maybe if we all just fucking wake the fuck up and help each other the world will get better so yeah i don't know i love that good show good musician look him up if you haven't i forgot really quick speaking of concerts i uh just because it's the fact that we don't record for like a week on and we've gone now we have more to talk about. I saw the Hans Zimmer live. Oh my God. That looked awesome.

And that made me like, it was another same thing as you. I was like, the world is beautiful and music is community, is art, is love, is everything. And it was like to be there, to hear like Dune gladiator interstellar the lion king inception dark knight last samurai like all these things i was just like it was so moving and incredible and hans lemmer is just like the mozart of our time and it was just like oh i know when you were posting those on your story, I was like, I forgot he did that one and that one

and that one. Like, I just kept being like, oh my God. I wanted to run through a brick wall during the dune, like,

like, I wanted to literally, That was a great fucking impression. I wanted to run through a wall. A sand wall. A sand dune. You can find Alf on Instagram at alfredinnit.

You can find the show on Instagram at reviewreview. Reddit r slash reviewreview. Discord reviewreview. And you can find Riley on Instagram.com just the web browser, not the phone app, at Riley and Spot. And on Twitter.com for as long as it lasts

now known as xxxxxxx.com at Riley and spot and on twitter.com for as long as it lasts now known as xxx xxx.com hat rally coyote and on tick tock on the clock till the party don't stop at Riley and sport and as we say every single week on the show we're always saying it whenever not saying it mr. Potter

kinky oh fuck kinky we'll see you next time a little kinky baby reindeer bye my name is riley and spa and this is my what shook me when i see sonic the hedgehog i become Sonic the Hedgehog. I become so very thirsty. My brain it has just one flaw. It's furry little creatures. Be it cat or mouse or dog. I just love their furry features. I'm a furry and I'm proud.

I want to scream it now aloud. I'm a furry and I'm proud. I want from Sonic to be plowed. They look so sweet and cute. I don't know what to say.. Please, Sonic. Please, Julian. Please, Roger or the devil. Be my furry. Play me and leave me so, oh, disheveled. Yes. Oh, what am I saying?

Oh, disheveled. Oh, what might I say? Odishuval, Odischevaled. I'm a furry and I'm proud. I won't hide no more in the crowd. I don't care whether it's allowed. Please, Sonic. Please, Julian. Please, Roger or the Devil. Be my furry playmate And leave me so, oh, disheveled I know power would not cry What wonder if I were a witness And leave me so, oh, disheveled But no, one my funk.

That was a Hiddem original.