RHAP: We Know Survivor - The Social Game Ep 4: Wes Bergmann, Uncaged

Episode Date: February 6, 2025

This week on The Social Game, Kellie and Michele are joined by reality TV icon Wes Bergmann! Wes spills all about The Traitors, his time on Worst Cooks in America, his iconic looks, becoming a dad, and more. But that’s not all—Survivor legend Carolyn Wiger drops by for a hilarious game where she decides which people she follows on Instagram would be Traitors or Faithfuls.

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to bring you your favorite reality stars and swindle them to play games with us. Exactly. Today we have our first male guest and you know, this is a very girly chat vibes podcast, but I have full faith that he will rise to the occasion. Right, Michelle? Absolutely. I have lived with West before. He has been a roommate with three other girls, and I know that he can get down with the girl chat. I figured he would be the first appropriate person to bring on here.

I live with more women than both of you combined. So I say bring it. All right. Well, we're very excited to have you as I thought, Michelle. Would you know, you want to give us a little what if you had to like introduce Wes and talk about his full illustrious career? Well, how would you say that? You'd be like, he's on what shows? You might know him from worst cooks of America. He's probably do that. You might know him from Worst Cooks of America. You probably do.

That's his biggest claim to fame. I would say he's a washed up retired challenge player that now is just searching for that hit of adrenaline in other reality shows. Has he found them? Well, he's been on his knees to check, but he can't seem to find the exact, where am I headed?

Sorry, I am so scared. I I'm going to stop there. As you should. Yeah. Did you like that? No, listen, he's the most iconic. He was the the linchpin missing in the challenge season 40, but he is retired from the challenge. And now he's on to bigger and better things. Whereas Cooks in America has civilians,

traders now as a cage boy. He's everywhere. This is why you're here, right? In New York for the traders. I'm here for Traders Press. OK. And I think I'm meeting with somewhere like 40 different publications in the next 24 hours. And Michelle's like, Oh, you got time for me. I'm like, yeah, there is nothing I would like more than to just do another piece

of content after all of that. But I looked at all the press that I was going to be doing, and I was like, you know what? Those are just not big enough. Yeah. Let me come on. Yeah. Come on. R.H.P. Exactly. Come on. This struggling little podcast that's going to be canceled as soon as the next season of Survival. It's well, we're we're off.

We're taking a break. We're an offseason. We set the bar low. Yeah. Yeah. Right. It's planned that way. We're an off season podcast. We're taking a break. We're an off season podcast. We set the bar low, you know? Yeah. Right, so we can exceed expectations. You guys are their survivor version of hoes in different area codes. Exactly, that's what I was actually aiming for.

That's great, you know what? I was actually going to ask you, Wes, to give us a name because I feel like the Cage Boys of it all has been a real focus and it's kind of giving boy band, correct me if I'm wrong, the varsity jacket. I mean, I did, yeah, yeah. You said boy band, right?

I did say boy band. Oh, you said it. You guys even had like a boy band entrance, like the cage is coming down. It's kind of like in sync, you know, on stage, the dramatic reveal. We need you to burst out in the song. I was waiting for it, but it didn't happen.

No, I was trying not to cause any more attention to myself. The whole like showing up late in a cage sort of thing already did. You have like you have a tendency to have big entrances on USA to the one game that we played together. You came in the game started. We're all jazz. There's all survivors and Big Brother players CBS people and then six people ride in on jet skis. And we see this like ginger beard flapping in the breeze of the Atlantic, the Atlantic in Croatia. And there it comes in West. There was a statue made of you.

Yeah. My team had to carry a statue. I was in my whole plan was, OK, come in like really low key. And the first thing we had to do was carry as a team, a giant statue of myself up to the top of the mountain. Yes. Like, I'm not going to fly under the radar. And did you or did you not get that statue shipped home to you? It was, there was about a year of negotiation

and ultimately I did not pay. It would have been like almost 20 grand in shipping. Oh, that's ridiculous. And I, and this is the reason why it ultimately didn't cause it's, it's worth 20 grand. Yeah. The question is, and bananas and I have debated this for a year and we had people look into it, how weather resistant those actually cause it's not a real stat. It was kind of paper machete.

It was like something halfway between stone and paper machine. Yeah. And we were in bananas thing said it's stone. It's not stone. It's not stone. I carried that thing. Lord knows things that it's stone. It's not stone. It's not stone. I carried that thing. Lord knows I can't carry stone. You carried a statue of Wes. I carried a statue. Who is my champions? No, I carried bananas.

Yeah, you carried the statue that is now in South Calif. It was so heavy. Yeah, and his didn't look like him at all. Like mine looked a lot like me, so it was worth it. But the problem is like the weather in Kansas City would crush that statue. Yeah. Wouldn't it was worth it but the problem is like the weather in Kansas City would crush that that that that statue. Yeah. It wouldn't have been worth it but yeah so not doing a good job on staying under the radar. No but you I think it's hard for you to stand under the radar anyways you're a big game player that's what you're known for. I know it's like a double-edged sword because

it gets me invited to everything. Yeah. I get paid the most. Yeah. And I get paid the most and I get all the most perks. But I don't actually get to ever play a fair game because I step into every single house and I'm just immediately like attacked and talked about and this and that. And it's just kind of like, it kind of stinks. Do you feel that though, this season of the Traders, like, yes, you came in in the cages. And I think for a bit the heat was on you,

but it does feel like you kind of melted. I think you actually successfully, yeah. It definitely helped that they gave us a day of immunity. Yes, that was very smart of them. That was absolutely required and that gave us a day for them to like kind of start having fights amongst themselves which definitely definitely helped but if it had not been for that I mean I think they would have been going down the cage boy theories. They could have dropped that kind of quick. The first night. Yeah. Well, quite frankly, they were missing a few crayons in the box,

if you know what I mean. Because we spread a rumor that because we weren't there at the beginning that we could not be traders. And that took fire for at least another couple of days. Wow. That's an unbelievable lie. But anybody who knows any of you guys, who's seen any season that you've been on, would see through that lie right away. One of these three has gotta be.

But I did, when I looked to my left and to my right, and I knew who both of those guys were, I looked to my, because that's when I met them, was up in the trees in the cage. And I looked to my left and my right. I was like, one of in the trees in the cage, and I looked to my left and my right. And I was like, I was like, that one of these guys is definitely a trader. I knew I wasn't, because I had just been told.

And so then I have this, a little bit of advantage in the sense of, I'm the only one in the house that has more than likely a 50% shot of guessing one of these guys. So I kept both of them at like a Heisman distance, but like keep them close, because know, one of them might be your traitor angel, as Sandra puts it. Yes. Love that strategy. Well, you've got to know that one of these guys has some really unfair

power every single night. Yeah. So now you and you're like. You and Derek are like in cahoots at this point of the game. I mean, we're this is going to air a little bit later. As of where we are watching, it feels like you guys are kind of banned together to peep out the traitor. The, yeah, yeah. The problem is Rob,

and Rob has made these mistakes very publicly now. So this is not like spoiler stuff, but like, so this is all like in the show. In my opinion, he's made like such big mistakes that it's just a matter of time before they all kind of figure it out. I didn't really think that I was the one doing it. It was a shame that they got rid of so many survivors

because I feel like that is shields for people like Rob. Like there, you need, yes, you need people who are gullible, but you also need people who are gonna shield you and take some of the attention off that you can. Rob has also had a statue built in his honor. Yeah. So two out of three cage boys have statues. That's true.

We just need one for Derek, our big brother. Yeah, this is like giving like the Jonas Brothers and Derek as Kevin. He doesn't have the statue yet, but maybe he'll get one after the season There's no doubt that I wanted to work with the survivors Which is why I gave my shield to Jeremy as like my olive branch And I was trying to I was trying to suck up to all of them as you should because not only are they more than likely?

Just on their face value probably the smartest in the in the house are the more than likely just on their face value, probably the smartest in the house. They also represent the largest voting contingency outside of housewives. Who were just already being like. Who were like that. And don't get me wrong, I was also going to try and join the housewives.

Is there anybody who you were not gonna. No, that's the strategy. The thing about Wes that I have learned is he will accept anybody in to his motley crew of misfit toys. What I was doing. Well, yeah, not miss it because it's all of them. I tried to divide the house and then become the president of both sides. That's kind of, that's my shtick. I do that every single season and it,

and it's really never ever worked. But one day it's going to pay off and you're going to be like, I told you. The thing about it is the thing that all reality stars just don't get, especially the boring ones are just like, oh my God, that's such bad gameplay. And I'm like, I'm not doing it to win. I'm doing it to get rich and famous. Yeah. And like, you don't get rich and famous by playing like super smart like Kelly here. Yeah, he's not wrong.

You lose and get long-sighted. I think I played super smart and I'm like rich and famous, you know? No, no, no, no, no. You get rich and famous by stealing the show. You do that by creating Coke and Pepsi and then colluding and then being the president of both of them. So I was trying to get in with the housewives and then I was pitting them against survivor and then I was getting in with the survivor people and pitting them against the housewives. And then I was just little old me right in the middle.

Uh, a dear old faithful, a good old boy, faithful. Oh my God. When I was told I was faithful, that just felt that was, yeah. I was gonna ask, are you bummed or? Yeah. I was like, I flew all the way here and you guys are going to let somebody that's not me be a. Yeah. It's a big ego blow. That is such. It's a big ego blow, because the thing about being a faithful is that they have to know that you can like carry the confessionals.

You can carry the show. You can kind of like you can kind of run the narrative and they have to have somebody who they really trust to move it all along and they obviously didn't feel you were equipped for that role. I'm sure it felt like really soul splitting for you. I'll let you have that one. Thank you. But you're being put on warning. This is supposed to be one. This is supposed to be girl talk. Oh, yeah. OK, OK.

So what color nail polish are you talking about? The outfits of the traders. How did you choose your inspiration for wearing full tux last episode? I was not. That's not a tux. That's a custom suit. I was just going to say it was fitted very nicely. I had that specially made just for traders, and I had the word faithful stitched into the collar.

Stop. That is so cute. And I brought another suit that you're also going to see, and it says, and I had a trader stitch into it. So I was prepared. You were prepared? I was prepared. No matter which one they put me in, I was already, because do you know how great it would have been if I, because if I was a trader and made it to the finale and then showed them the

inside of my collar that says pre-stitched, that is what I had. That is the vision. Well, one can hope that that we still get that because yeah, you could get recruited. The traders are just eating each other and we're bound to get a new trader soon Crew I feel you know you're already you're already kind of Have both sides of the house you already a little demonic you know Are you wearing devil horns in worst cooks in America? No, that's that's yes worst cooks in America Yeah, yeah, well cuz it's it's heroes versus villains.

And I'm on the heroes versus villains. Works Cooks of America. Yeah. And I'm on the villain team. And you want to know what's ironic is the villains were actually much like nicer people. Yeah. Well, it'd be like that. It's like Glinda and oh, this is a do you watch Wicked Glinda and Elphaba? Elphaba like, OK, well, here's the plot. Real quick. OK, real quick. Ariana Grande, she's Glinda, you know, because Frankie Grande's and worst cooks of America with you

And if you're following him, you know everything about this Yeah, he's seen Wicked 29. I know he has and it's so cute and I would hope that Brother is so supportive and it's like that runtime is like three hours. It's a long one. Yeah. But the good witch is kind of like morally gray. She kind of does what like everybody thinks, she thinks is the right thing to do, like out looking.

And then the person who like goes against the grain, but morally is doing the right thing is the wicked witch. Yeah, it's time to reel this conversation back into something more entertaining. Okay. Well, for a lot of people, a lot of people, Wicked is entertaining. Is it? Yeah, that's kind of over. Better listening to offseason Survivor podcast. Not just Survivor.

I know you guys are trying really hard to make this not just Survivor. But it's just not going to happen. I try so hard, but you do. Lord knows you can. Survivor comes back to you. It's not gonna happen. I try so hard, but Lord knows you can't survive. Survivor comes back to you. It really does. You can't forget your first love. It always finds a way. My first love, it's like the tatted version.

I just try to forget about that person and kind of move along into my next phase. How sad. So the challenge is the not tatted version? I don't know if that tracks. It doesn't track. Interesting, I'll work on that analogy actually. It's more like the challenge is the tatted marriage material. Okay, okay, I got it.

Devin doesn't have a single tat. Right, neither do I. A beer belly for days, but no tat. That's sexy. It really is. You guys love insulting each other. Me and Devin? And the chat, no, just this whole in general vibe.

Oh, well, it's sarcasm laced with love. Perfect. The coolest people on our show, we banter in a way to where like, it's how you know that you can, you only trust people that are kind of talking shit. Because it's too hard to talk shit and secretly go against someone. It's too hard to talk shit and secretly go against someone. It's too hard. And so the idea is that, you know, you kind of, if soon as someone starts being nice to you, you know that they're about to turn on you. I was in the dog house once with Wes

and he was like really nice to me. And I was like, oh God, oh God, I have to repair. I was thinking about voting for her at that point. It was crazy. I literally had to like almost throw my entire game out of the window to like repair the relationship. And I did. Yeah.

And I recovered and. And then I went back to talking shit. And we were shit talking from our twin size beds directly next to each other. I love those. That's kind of girly chat. It was so girly chat. We had a girl. Sleepover. We had a real girls girl.

Oh, and then Michaela and Michaela. It was so girly chat. We had a girl listen to our room. We had a real girl's girl. Oh, and then Michaela. And Michaela. It was USA? It was USA. Oh, I've seen this. Michaela, who is one of my favorite people of all time. So she's like, I still keep in contact with her, but her and I were not getting along at that time. I'll take partial credit for it,

but really I'm mostly blaming her because she, everyone had a hard on for getting rid of the challenge boys. Yeah. And she was at, she was like, everyone had a hard on for getting rid of the challenge boys. Yeah. Um, and she was at, she was like, she's at the helm at the helm of that. And the fact is like, I was being super charming and stuff. And so she didn't know like how, like her computer could not compute all that like, Oh my gosh, a person that would be really good for my game and knows what he's doing and

wants to work with me. But I came in here with this plan to show them who owns CBS. And so she couldn't like deal with that. But then we had little old Alyssa. Yeah, we had sweet old Alyssa. From big brother? Oh my God, can we talk about Tyler? Just because when I think of Alyssa,

it then leads me to Sparkles. And then Sparkles lead me to girl talk about Tyler because we do our makeup together. It's a whole train. You kind of understand. She was always shimmered out. It was so cute. Shimmered out.

She was just like this fairy of a girl who like she always had glitter on and she just had like a glittery aura and she was just like really sweet and cute and she fell for this guy, Tyler. Who's very sweet. Tyler, Tyler, big brother Tyler? Yes. Oh yeah.

Who's also like apple pie. That's the same. It's like you bite into something Who's also like that. Yeah, that's the same. It's like you bite into something and it's so sweet. Yeah, it's adorable. And now Tyler just like secretly Kylie Jenner had having a baby. He did Kylie Jenner. It was like, boom.

It's a lot easier to do that as a man. I did that on my kids too. I was like. But he's like, I got a baby and I'm engaged. And and now he's like full back to posting. He like was engaged. And and now he's like full back to posting. He like was quiet and then now he's like lifting weights again. I was like when Beyonce dropped her like surprise album. It was like, I got to come back full.

Did come out of nowhere. It did. I was like, Congrats. He is going to make the best dad ever. But it was well, I mean, is he going to is he going to make the baby immediately vegan? Is what I wouldn't I wouldn't medically suggest that. Oh yeah, that was like half his personality. I forgot about that. What?

I forgot about that. That baby is probably like sipping freaking Kale tonics instead of rest products. Not a medically advisable thing, just gonna put that out there. I bet you would disagree. He probably would. You know, he can go to a different doctor.

But I did watch this and I don't fully remember it. Well, that's my first experience with you, Wes. And I asked Michelle before we did this podcast to kind of explain to me things about you and she really led with you live next to Travis Kelsey and Taylor Swift. So this first thing, first thing, I mean, listen, shared interest that you've been to say. So we were we like to play games on this podcast. We like to fuck around a little bit.

So you kind of inspired our. Sadly, though, like if you want to be innovative, where this news got most publicly broken was the first time I was on rap. Oh, really? Really? Yeah, so it actually got on like one of the, not like a TMZ. Oh, it was like TMZ.

It was like a paparazzi. It was like, no, no, no, that's different. That's a different one. Oh, okay. It was funny, that was the European one. That was hilarious by the way. They posted it, what? They posted that.

That's so funny. They papped him and thought he was Travis Kelsey. Yeah, I've got a sick truck. I mean, that's a compliment. And he's like wearing a hat in it. And it's like Travis Kelsey leaves his like 30 million dollar van. Mansion is like West. But it's because the truck is a it's a it's a bad ass truck. They're like, only Travis Kelsey would drive this truck.

You got a monster truck. BMWs. It's a bad ass truck. They're like, only Travis Kelsey would drive this truck. You got a monster truck. Three of BMWs. It's a bad ass monster truck. But he has a truck as well. But I think mine's better. Yeah, he's got the electric Hummer. OK, well, that's that's like so counterintuitive. It's like my brain is like, well, you either have a Hummer because you're like that guy that has a Hummer and then you make it electric, which is kind of like a Prius kind of person. It's like,

which one are you? He's like an oxymoron. He's an enigma. He is. On one end, he's like this big tough football player. On the other end, he's probably gonna have like 12 Taylor Swift songs written about him. I know. Catch you a man that can be both. Probably more than 12. Okay. And on that note, I was like the first person to know about any of this stuff. And I tried to tell this woman a long time ago, I was like, they're together, just so you know, all of a sudden she was like. You had the tea and didn't believe it? She didn't believe it.

She was like, she only goes for artists. And I was like. Yeah, I did say that. Up to that point she was kind of. I did say that. I beat the validating of her showing up to games and stuff by like six months. Yeah, you did.

And here's the thing is that just based on her track record, she loves a brooding artist. She does. That's true. Usually they're a bit scrawny or they're kind of like, yeah, he's not scrawny. They're kind of like womanizers, you know, in a lot of ways. And John Mayer, John Allen who seems chivalrous and like an all good American football player. Yeah. and he's just been winning. Yeah, for me, he's the boy next door. Yeah, the boy next door.

No, quite literally, he is the boy next door. Well, knowing Taylor Swift's boyfriend before Michelle definitely wins the girly chat award of this podcast. But I brought this up because I wanted to lead us into the game we're going to play. Yeah. So what we're going to play. Yeah. So what we're going to play now is the Ares tour, Wes's version. Okay. Okay. You have been on many seasons of reality TV for a very long time.

And Brandon here scoured the Internet through your illustrious career to bring us some of your greatest looks. And we would love for you to not only just, you know, this is a podcast. We have that we have the audio and the video, but we want you to really describe what we're looking at, what inspired the look, what inspired the look. And then maybe name the era. OK, you know, like the reputation era, the lover era. Right. Got it. I should have asked for approval in this game. Oh, you know, you will never. I wasn't going have asked for approval in this game. Oh, you don't want to.

You will. I wasn't gonna ask for approval because I needed it to happen. Let's go, let's go. So we're gonna show us the photo, but we'll also add in, you know, so everybody can see it. So photo number one, starting off real strong here.

Should it, okay, wow. Yep, that is me. That is actually illegal to show that picture because I am wearing essentially no clothing and I'm, and I'm underage. I am, I think, I am 15 years old in that picture. You know, we do like to make Rob. I am 15 in that picture. They, they had quality photos like that when you were 15. How long?

It's 30 years ago. 40 years ago. Okay. So that is, okay. when you were 15? How long? Was it 30 years ago? 40 years ago? Okay, so that is, okay, so I grew up and went to like a very prolific swim team and swim program. And so that's a picture of me doing the butterfly. And I can tell that I'm about 15 by the color of the goggles. By the goggle color.

I could also tell you roughly probably what month that was taken. Cause I know by how long the hair is. The idea is you started a certain, cause there's a soccer length. And then when soccer season's over, you grow it out until you shave it all off. And so that means that that was probably like early January. That is probably why you're also like blindingly pale. Well, no, I'm always blind.

Oh, got it. Okay. That's like, that's across all eras. Here we go. Next one. Oh, got it. Okay. That's like, that's across all eras. Okay. Yeah. Here we go, next one. Oh, baddie. Bad boy. You're holding the bell.

At least I'm over 18 in this picture, but I cannot legally drink in this one. Okay. This is my bad boy era, possibly. Okay, nice. But I'm 20 years old here, so I can't legally drink, even though I'm on national television drinking every single night.

This is my, that's my... Yeah, how does that work? Well, what happened was I had fake ID. Yeah, of course. So you got my fake ID and then I got, and then once they, they wanted us to bring cameras there. And then what was crazy though, is they let us into all these places for three months. And then we did like this weird off week where we weren't filmed to do press

and then they had us do two days filmed again in the real world house but the press aired and so it came out on like and like the cover of the of the local big newspaper in Austin that I was 20 and they're like we've been letting this child into our bars all season. They get shut down for that. So apparently drink underage drinking got way harder in Austin, Texas. Oh, what a legacy. You may. I think it's many names for this era. Then that's where parties are still thriving there.

They've they've supplemented their underage drinking. It took 20 years. Or how long has it been since parties screaming? Yeah, we're back, baby. Adorable. Bad boy era and or changing the landscape of Austin, Texas. Also probably January. OK.

Well, you really can't tell with the... This one is great. Oh my. Wow, look at that faux hawk. Yeah, well, that's not a faux hawk. It's not? That's a mohawk. That is a mohawk.

My defense, I am looking at it upside down. Yeah, but upside down, sideways, or otherwise, that is a legitimate mohawk. Sorry, I didn't mean to insult them. Flexing. Very legit mohawk. Looking like. Yeah, as if I, I mean, if anything.

Notice the t-shirt as well. Yeah, it says casting director, which is funny, because that joke is ahead of its time. Right now, there's a whole porn category about casting director, but that was in 2005 max. So that was, there was no, there wasn't even porn like that back in the day. You'd have to steal your parents' porn

if that as the best option. And so, yeah, so that's it. That joke was ahead of its time. Love the shirt, Love the traditional West. Is this a challenge? Is this doing the challenge? That's the cast photo for my very first challenge, the fresh meat.

We were in that picture. It was in somewhere, Byron Bay, Australia. And do we think the flexing is giving intimidation or is it giving? Well, no, it's playful. Look, I'm just kind of like. Yeah, what is the face? It's giving. Hmm. Yeah.

Is that good for the audio listeners? Can you picture? Can you picture? It's like a seductive thing. Perse lips. Kind of come get me eyes flexing. It's a come hither. It's a come to my casting couch. Yeah, it's giving a little.

It's giving a little pervy, but he's, he's over age and still young. So it's not too pervy. I still can't legally drink yet. Oh really? Okay. I'm still 20. Okay. Wow. You had a big year in your 20. I couldn't legally, I couldn't legally drink until my fourth television show.

Wow. But it shows like if people are trying to figure out how to replicate some like, like CT and and eyes as an example success you start them You have to start them way younger like you you two probably start pretty old You were young. I'm older. Oh, that's a whole lifetime. It's our my casting process when I was 19 Yeah, but I was on a good old show being like by the time Family being like, family. You know, my cameos are still like 15 year old girls, like, like moms getting them for their children,

being like, you're such an inspiration to my daughter. Like, that's my cameos. And yours are like. No, well, you talk dirty to me. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Amanda's like, who are you on the phone with in there? No, she's like, make that money, baby.

I say that to, I say that to deaf people. So what are we going to call this era? That's my casting director era. Casting director era. OK, wow. So that was the first show that I was legally able to drink. So the theme of this game and podcast is legal drinking age. And once again, I'm wearing very little clothing.

And you wanted to that picture still to this day, pissing me off. Obviously I look very sexy there. He's in a boxing outfit. He's in a boxing outfit. He's not wearing a top. He's buzz cut. And somehow the photographer was able to add like maybe like four or five feet to his actual size.

So that's not. It makes you look a lot taller than you actually are. I'll tell you what,, this is a little bit, it's difficult to photograph me because of the pale skin, but you would have never met someone more ripped than me in that moment. I can actually tell, you do look really pretty jacked. No, that looks just like, kind of like fight club jacked

in that photo because of the lighting, but if there was better shadowing, you'd be like, oh my gosh, that is the most ripped man that photo because of the lighting. But if there was better shadowing, you'd be like, oh my gosh. Yeah, that is the most ripped man that has ever been on television. And so that would have been my really painting the picture for you. That would have been my peak time. Like if you took like a grungy iPhone photo, it would look better than that because it just looks so I look athletic.

Yeah, you look very athletic. It's it's your best picture. Like looks wise. Yeah, but it pisses me off, though, because like I'm telling you, I was peak in that moment and peak era. Yeah. And you look tall in it, which is nice. Yeah. I look my height. Five, ten. Yeah. Five, ten.

Yeah. How tall are you really? Five, ten. Yeah, five, ten. How tall are you really? Five, ten. Ten. Okay, next. Okay, way later. Wow, you guys took a big jump in time. Okay, we've teleported. So that is me at the MTV Movie Awards. Looking five, ten.

You gotta read the t-shirt out for us. Obviously, like, when everyone else is wearing tuxes and stuff. And I show up in my G.I. Joe joggers with my tucked into my socks. High socks, high black socks and tucked into the joggers. And a T-shirt that says puppies make me happy in size. Huge font. Yeah, huge font. Thank God it's not comic stands. It's a classic Ariel font.

Huge though. Didn't have time to shave before. He's got a five o'clock shadow going on. Yeah. People really, I think people really underestimate how little I care about things. I don't think after seeing that photo anybody's under-estimating it.

You gotta rate it. But okay, fun fact, that's actually the day the Bananas and I got together. So our... Oh, you guys went to this day? Yes. That, the week prior, our rivalry, it was very entertaining, but we both destroyed each other's game.

And so we had to fly back from Thailand and they gave us, and we were, and they were like, oh, well, since you guys are home early, can you go accept this award at the MTV Movie Awards? And so we so we so I put on puppy shirt. He put on the suit. We look completely opposite. But we had we had ruined each other's game for the last time. And we figured it out that night. Well, that is romantic. OK, so why don't we name that after the bananas?

Bananas reconciliation. There's also a really, really long name. Laurel story from that night. But yeah, I heard about that. I heard about one more thing. But again, I actually am in a new era personally. Everyone this I'm actually not going to be mean to Laurel ever again publicly or in person, because I feel like it's just kind of kicking a puppy when she's down.

Yeah. And puppies make you happy. You can you can you can do that yeah not in that shirt we got one more I think we ended there I think that's yeah that's a well one of my favorite pictures taken of my daughter and I really sweet yeah she felt we were we were outside on our on my deck and she fell asleep on my arms and Amanda came and shot like a creepy shot. It's so sweet. Yeah. And then your arm falls asleep and you can't move. You're stuck there forever while you have things to do. But like, it's cute when it happens.

The kids, the kids call that nap trapped. Nap, trap trap. I was nap trapped there. Nobody that was'd rather be. That's a good place to be nap trapped. So cute. She's so cute. The little pigtails. Okay, how old is she now?

She's 16 months. So a year and a few months. That's fantastic math. Why don't people make it a month? That's how you do it. Why don't we start going to years? Because so much changes by the month at that phase. Like medically you do this as well.

So that's like a thing. A 16 month old is gonna have different things that you do for her than a 12 month old. And so because of- 18 months, even two months makes a huge difference and developmentally. Wow. And now it's like, I can go like two to four years

without even a single- Without any development. I don't develop at all. It just, it like works the opposite for me. It's like every two months, it gets a little worse than worse, you know? I like downgrade. I feel like I'm Benjamin Button.

We'll do this with you in reverse next time. Okay. Interesting, fascinating. Okay, so we'll end on the dad era. Sure. Unless you have a better name. No, dad era is a good one, yeah. And that's where you are now. I'm in my dad era? Sure. Unless you have a better name. No, dad era is a good one, yeah. And that's where you are now.

I'm in my dad era. So cute. Do you think it's helped you, hurt you, done anything for you on the shows? On the show? Well, I was hoping, okay, so for years I got gas lit about voting in dads and stuff. And so I was like, okay, here's one of the many benefits

of having a daughter is that I'm gonna be able to leverage her to make money on reality competition shows. And, and, and, uh, and no one was having it. So, so just so everybody knows it is nothing to do with everyone. You know, it's not, it's not for leverage. You really wanted to have a baby. No, no, no. I had the baby so I could use her as leverage to advance myself in various competition shows.

One day she'll watch this podcast. Nothing else that you've done, but she'll watch this. This is top billing. This is a capsule podcast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Time capsule. We'll send her a USB drive. Yeah.

That's so cool. Yeah, I don't have to worry. This show Yeah. That's so cool. Yeah. I don't have to worry. This show is going to be canceled so soon. Yeah. Okay. Well, they only sign us for six episodes. Yeah.

Yeah. So you're correct. Until things pick back up. We're the void fillers. We're void fillers. We're just here in the gap of presence. I mean, after you have Parvati and I, where could you possibly go from here? Devin.

No, that's off. Well, not from Parvati. Like where could you possibly go from here? Devin. No, that's off. Well, not from Parv, but from, I figured what we would do is like sort of, it's like a roller coaster sort of situation. Like Parv was the peak and then you go down and then we go up and then. Didn't we learn a thing or two from her

not to peak too early? Yeah. Okay. Well. Oh, and I need to explain that to all your listeners that don't watch survivor. And I know from what you've told me, 99% of the people that will listen to this don't have any clue even who you guys

are from survivor. So that joke, that joke means that we've got a woman here that might've peaked a little too early and she got voted out because of it. Whereas, you know, you peaked at the right time. You got rid of all the smarter, better players. And then and then. Did you watch my season? I ended with Aubrey, who went to Brown. OK.

I really did not. Exactly. So actually, I was sitting there. Sure. Ty, I thought we were going to make it the whole episode without an Ivy League mention. Yeah, she went to Yale. So. Oh, nice. She went to Yale and she talks about it all the time. Michelle brings it up every fucking episode. She makes it her whole identity. Dude, we get it. You have, we know. I lost survivors so I gotta make something else. My personality. Not all of us can make it.

So what is that like though to be sitting next to someone that is smarter than you and went to Arizona state? Is it like a lot of wasted money or? Wait, I didn't put it. I got a lot of I got some scholarships. That took her three or four full seconds to make that joke. Do do do do. I ran a few versions of that joke to land on where we got. Listen, if you get to two milliseconds, it's too late.

Got it. Damn it. OK, well, I you have coached me in a lot of ways. And I feel like this is a teachable moment. So I have to be quicker with my retorts. But then I stumble over my words and it's not exactly precise. We'll work on it. But did you notice I was only like five to seven minutes late today? This is actually your most on time you've ever been.

I think Wes called me to make sure that I was on my way out. Actually, our first interaction was discussing your timeliness. Yeah, he gave me some good advice, so I'll take it into account for the future. Lie to me. Yeah, don't worry about what the advice was. That's his strategy. Did I lie to you today? No. So therefore, maybe I have a different strategy. OK, but here's what I will say.

Wes has taught me. Stay on your toes. Wes tried to teach me how to date and look at me now. Yeah, you are peaking. I am peaking. His best friend. Yeah. So I feel like I took your advice.

Yeah, you did. Great listener. I am working on my timely thing. I am nothing, you said it on the phone, we can't lie now. I'm nothing if not coachable. And you are my coach. You are my shepherd and I am a sheep. Yeah, I'm you are. You are going. I like that.

Demi Moore and I am the play. Is that ghost? I don't know what that means. That one over my head. Oh, no, I get it. Yeah. From the ghost. Yeah, I got it. I'm watching Demi Moore right now on a different show. So yeah, shit, that was kind of that's that's an old reference. Yeah. Oh the ghost. I got it. I'm watching Demi Moore right now in a different show. So yeah, that was kind of that's an old reference. Yeah. Oh, yeah. It was it was a throwback. Yeah.

Yeah. I thought it would actually hit with your age range. No, I got it eventually. I'm just literally in the middle of a Demi Moore show right now. So you should have known that Michelle threw me through a loop. All right. OK, well, we on that happy note, let's go up. Bring it obviously ending on Demi Moore. Yeah, Demi Moore.

If you're just joining us, why we have another voice in the mix. We brought she needs no introduction. Really? Do you know that? Do you know the voice? Welcome to the offseason survival podcast. We're very honored to have Carolyn here with us. Thank you for popping in. She feels betrayed by Wes.

And to be honest with you, you really haven't played with Wes unless you have that feeling at some point. Okay, that's not true. But let's put it, do we even need to explain why you feel betrayed though? Because I thought you were my friend. We are friends, but let's, and to just really-

I don't have a lot of friends. Let's put it this way. She's this upset at me over my Patreon content, which is patreon.com Backslash Weston Bergman. If you can get this trader this riled up, it only costs $25 a month and I'll get you riled up too. And if you go on the archives, there's a few that actually I hosted and those are his best episodes.

You can go back and then unsubscribe when the free trial ends. I was going to and then I felt stupid too. But then with the tax, it's almost $30. And again, I thought I was going to get more like talking shit like behind like I thought you'd make fun of someone's outfit or I thought that you would, you don't do any of that. No, I compliment an outfit at the end of every episode. Everyone gets one look of the episode. Yeah, the Luke. The Luke of the episode.

The Luke of the episode. Wow, what a good subscriber over here. I'm not a subscriber because I feel like I should get a discount for friendship, but I do feel that I've hosted enough of them, co-hosted enough of them, been a guest at enough of them to know there's a loop. There's three things.

She got addicted for a while and she didn't want to pay. So she would ask on the sly for the link. Yeah. Cause she wanted all the analysis. Why the hell do I have to pay? I didn't know you wanted it. You just popped up one day. I got an email that said, Carolyn just subscribed.

And I listened and I'm just, you know. And just for the record, it is it is just such good analysis that it's got her this bothered that you all should subscribe to. It's my point, Wes. And I know that we all have a version of us on TV. I don't watch the challenge, but I know who the fuck was. It's just like Bob the Drag Queen would know who Dorinda is. Just like, you know, who the bigger people fucking are, even if you don't watch. So I knew who he was and I hated him and I was like, fuck him.

That's what I have to do is just know it from the bottom. She has no idea who I am. She hated me before he came in on the cages. I said, I can't go. And I said it to Wells, who apparently loves you. I was like, I'm so glad that redheaded fucker isn't here. Because of I judged him, I guess, just like other people judge, blah, blah, blah. But then I'm like, wow, he really is nice and blah, blah.

This is the truth is that some people like West has done this. How many times? 20 plus. 20 plus. He is hardened in a lot of ways. I don't have emotion anymore. Like I just don't feel it. And like I, I really like I come into when I went on the challenge, everybody was like, she's so emotional all the time. And it's because when you're new and you're fresh and like, this is your second

season, it's OK to feel all the feels like it is valid in a lot of ways. Like, but you also have to compartmentalize and be like, it's a game. Like eventually you're going to get hardened. So try to actually enjoy the emotion. And then you become like Wes, who's just a statue and unbothered by anything. I wish I wasn't a statue.

Got me in trouble. I know. You're circling back the statues. Okay, let's play this game. They made a statue out of me on a show and on a show. Because you're so like. Yes. Like boss of the island of the idols. And then I asked him this like, how the fuck do you you've been doing this for so long?

And I will never forget. And you're like, I don't have a soul. I don't know. I didn't say that. I said I'm a sociopath. I know. I think I said I don't know. That's anonymous. But he's like, I heard all redheads. Redheads in general are known to not have souls. They don't have souls. We definitely have a soul.

We have lots of them. I've collected them. Sorry if there's any redheads listening. That's just what I heard. This is gonna be rapid fire. So it's just gonna be like one word and you guys are gonna do it at the same time, okay? Carolyn, these are mostly your followers.

Who you're following. On Instagram. So you're gonna know them. You will probably know them. But we're going to ask you at the same time to say, would they be a traitor or would they be faithful? Sorry, Mike. This is going to be a variety of people, reality stars, famous people. And you got to give us your gut check. We both answered.

So it could be like, like we say the first thing that we say, like, say, I say, Voldemort, you love that. You know, that is that yesterday. Trader. Then three, like, say I say Voldemort. You love that. You love that. I used that yesterday. Trader. Then three, two, one. Trader. OK, right. So that's going to that's how it's going to work. OK. How do I win? But do I have to count every time? Are you guys like, can you do it? We can do it. OK.

Yeah, you can do it. This is a non-ok. Everyone wins this guy. Everybody wins. It's a win win. You have you feel strongly about why you can, you can leave a quick answer. Why? Thank God. I'm succinct as Kido fire. Rapid fire. OK, ready? First one. Paracelton. Traitor. Faithful.

OK. Carson. Traitor. Faithful. I'm just saying. That was a gut check. Faithful. Poor Carson. Carson might like to be a traitor. Yeah, he's no. Yeah, no. Traitor, because he really is a devil. OK, just in certain ways.

OK, Rome. Uh, I know this. So that's a traitor. What do you think? Faithful. Maybe he'd be like the loud faithful. Yeah. The wrong faithful. OK. Tiffany Pollard.

Faithful. Faithful. OK. Pass me. Easy. Yeah. Well, she could be funny either way. She would be funny. She would actually be bringing. I don't know how she's done on that show yet. How? Oh, I'm not.

OK, ready? Johnny Fairplay. Traitor. Faithful. Faithful. Why? That man can't carry. He can't. He certainly can't. And he's our direct competition with podcasting.

True. OK. No, we're not kidding. We are kidding. We are kidding. Yeah. OK. OK. M.M. Trader. Reversed trader. Yeah. OK. Oprah was was he your season? We think you don't get it.

Yes. Oprah. Yeah. Oprah. Oh, faithful. Yeah. Kim Kardashian. Faithful. Faithful. Yeah. Kim Kardashian. Trader. Trader. She might be good at it. Justin Bieber. Faithful. Sure. I hate like, you know what I'm saying? I'm like not like you're not a bee. You don't have the Bieber fever. You follow him.

Yeah, you find you. I don't. Oh, he might have just said. Brandon. This is taking it with Brandon. I follow him. I do, find you. No, I don't. Oh, he might have just said. Brandon, this is taking it with Brandon. I follow him. I do too. Oh, maybe these are from us. What is going on with the wife? Are they fighting stuff?

No, no, no, they're good. Oh, I have no idea. Beyonce. Traitor. Faithful. Dr. Will. I really enjoy him. Faithful. Traitor though.

Faithful. I like Dr. Will. I think that once fun about Carolyn being so entertaining in the turret is that she is unexpected. And that's why she's doing a good job. You think Boss and Rob knew what was coming? But that's what's funny is like a guy like me who just screams traitor. It's too obvious. I'm so obvious that it's funnier watching me have to explain Faithful.

Like if I ever went on, I'd want to be a traitor, but Lord knows the stress would tear me apart. But you think I have Michelle Downs, like me as a traitor, I would totally implode. I showed up in a custom suit that had Faithful written into the collar. Which did they edit out of the episode? I didn't see it on the back. They edited it out. Yeah.

What? I was going to ask you that. Why? You thought that was adorable? I thought it was funny. Yeah, I like that. But they didn't show it. I was like, did they take that out? They took the time to like blur it out. No, no. I like showed people in the breakfast room. I was like, hey, everybody, look at this. Look how pumped I was to be a faithful. How do we how do we begin to sum up what we just experienced?

I don't know. But it was lovely. Yeah. Carolyn, thank you for coming in, bringing the best energy as always. Yeah. No, you are doing great. You're doing amazing, sweetie. And honestly, I don't really know how that game went, but we tried to fit it in there. We've been in there. We squeezed it in. They're all. They're all fucking. And I think we'll leave it with this.

They're all fucking traitors. There's not a God. You're a traitor. Yes, you're a traitor. No, unfortunately, I'm the only one that's not a traitor. Yeah, I know. We're. Thank you for joining us in your weird hotel room. There's a bathtub across from us. I know. Carolyn, thank you so much.

Carolyn, thank you so much. I want to say Caroline so bad because you're dressed like you're dressed like a little like frou frou trader girl. And I want to put this on the outfit. You're like giving like little bo peep. And everyone calls me Caroline, too. I don't take offense to it. and I kind of wish my name was. I know everybody. Everybody calls me Michelle.

I'm like, stop. Everyone calls you Michelle. Everyone calls me Michelle. It's very French. Okay. I would just like to say from the from the coolest derivative of Rob has a podcast that there could possibly be. We're out. See you next week. Bye! Bye!