Right About Now - Legendary Business Advice - The Secret To Lachlan Patterson’s Hilarious Success: It’s All About Delivery

Starting point is 00:00:02 You're listening to the Radcast, a top 25 worldwide business podcast. If it's radical, we cover it. Here's your host, Ryan Alford. Hey guys, what's up? This is Ryan Offer, your host. It's the Radcast. And man, we say if it's radical, we cover it. And I just glad I get to name my number these days.

Starting point is 00:00:29 You know, I'm going on the gram, scrolling through. I don't ever know what's going to hit my feed. I got, you know, babies over here. I got this over there. People trying to ask me for money over here. And then this funny as hell comedian hits my radar. Damn, Lachlan Patterson. What's up, Lockland?

Starting point is 00:00:51 Hey, buddy. Just hanging out, man. Thanks for having me on your show. Hey, man. You know, I get to name my number now. I get to go, who do I want? hopefully they look they got to respond it's a reciprocation which luckily you did you're hilarious man you just i i am a connoisseur of comedy you know and you're funny man really funny thanks

Starting point is 00:01:17 thanks dude i just i want to have you on the show if nothing else to go lachlan patterson is fucking talented and he needs to know that ryan offer thinks that it may mean nothing but you know i saw i checked that box that box you know i saw i checked that box right here. I'm honored. Thank you. That always feels good. I don't ever get tired of that. Thank you. Your skills, your craft. That's what you do for a living. And I think people maybe take, don't quite realize, like, entertainers, like, this is the job. Like, they're doing it, but, like, it's a profession. It's a skill. Like, they enjoy the, obviously, everybody likes cheers, but knowing that other people

Starting point is 00:02:01 appreciate what you do and see the value of that in the world we live in. It's so serious. And so, God, we need more Lockland Patterson's in the world. Thanks, man. You know, it's funny. It sucks that I need like, like, like I could have a YouTube video and then under the comments, it has all these comments that are like, keep it going. Thank you. You're so funny. And then one guy's like, this guy looks like nickel back. And then, and I'm just miserable. I'm like, let it. Melt it. the floor. First of all, nickelback's not a guy either.

Starting point is 00:02:38 No. So they didn't even take the time. But what I try to do is probably of similar ages where I just try to keep a level head about everything. Don't get too excited by all the excitement and also don't get too down about the nickelback comment.

Starting point is 00:03:02 Well, one wise mentor told me, you haven't officially made it until someone cares enough to criticize you. So, like, it, like, literally, it's easy to criticize, but at the same time, most people just, it's kind of, if they're not stopping at all, in that time, kind of like, they need to put you down, then you've officially. know that you're doing something right. So it probably hasn't always come across that way because we're all human beings and we're like, oh, damn, is he right? I thought I was, everyone else said it was good.

Starting point is 00:03:45 This guy said it's bad. Maybe it's really bad. Well, I'll listen to him, Lachlan. You're funny. And I, I've shown you now to like 20 people and every one of them was like, yeah, like dying. So it's

Starting point is 00:04:00 Thanks, man. Yeah, man. I mean, it's it's good shit. I mean, you're, what, Canadian? I mean, I know I'm jumping right in. I'm like giving you all these accolades, but I know everybody's going to be able to find you and listen and go, damn, we heard Lackland on the Radcast and he is funny as shit. So I will take pride in anyone that comes through that channel,

Starting point is 00:04:21 but let's set the table for everybody, Lachlan, and tell a little bit about your story and let's talk a little bit about the business of comedy. Yeah, let's do it. let's set the table. How should I set it? Yeah. What made you so funny?

Starting point is 00:04:39 I think I just was like, I was an awkward kid for sure. I didn't, you know, I, yeah, I had trouble making friends and comedy seemed to be the way I fit in. I would, I was a joker. I was always trying to make people laugh. And I wasn't good at it, obviously, to start. So it would often get me in trouble. You know, the, the dig on comedians is often that they don't take things seriously, which is great when it's that time. But, you know, it's like a kid who just isn't funny.

Starting point is 00:05:18 You know, it becomes annoying. So I was annoying for a long, long time. And then. Because people didn't get it? Is it because you were kind of dry and it was like it went over their head or something? I don't think I even got it. Like for the first, they say about comedy is you don't really find your persona or whatever it is for the first 10 years. And I agree with that.

Starting point is 00:05:45 It was just me just like writing all these things that I thought were funny. But they just weren't. I didn't understand what I wanted. Now after 10 years, I think of a joke. and I can imagine how it would go. And it's a lot clearer to me. Even still today, I mean, I'm trying to work on this bit about the half sandwich and soup menu item and how ridiculous it is to me. And just like, just the idea of a half sandwich.

Starting point is 00:06:25 It's like the only thing on the menu that's half of something. and that some chef was like, what do you think about a half sandwich? And the owner's like, well, that's, let's tell me more. Well, what I do is I make a sandwich and then I cut it in half and I get rid of half of the sandwich and we just sell half a sandwich and soup. And I can't quite make it funny, but it's crazy to me. It's so funny to me that this is an item.

Starting point is 00:06:54 And I don't know, I'm trying to come up with conspiracy theories on why they do it. My lady thinks it's because they want you to buy the full sandwich. So because the other thing about the half sandwiches, see now here we go. I'm getting into it. I like it. Half sandwich is usually only like a couple of bucks cheaper than the full sandwich. So it's not even like a deal.

Starting point is 00:07:16 It's not like half price. So she's like, wouldn't do half a steak usually. Right. Half a chicken cordon blue. That's not flying. Right. Right. Everybody would think that you that you ate half of it before they gave it to them.

Starting point is 00:07:33 That's the other conspiracy is where's the other half of my sandwich? Like, tell me how this happened before I started eating. They got a guy in half of everything. Just the dishwasher. They keep the staff fed with the other half of your lunch. Yeah. Dude, we, yeah, it doesn't seem fair. Like, I'll be in your writer's room, man.

Starting point is 00:07:53 Like, you had it right there, dude. That's exactly what I was thinking. King is some, I don't want to order this until you tell me where the fuck the other half of my sandwiches. Exactly. It has nothing to do with this joke, but I always think back to Chris Farley and doing an S&L skit where they did the, sir, we secretly replaced your coffee with a taste your choice. And because usually they do that, there's an old commercial where they do that.

Starting point is 00:08:24 They go, oh, wow, I didn't know. You know, but he gets mad, like, throws the table. Yeah. You son of a bitch. Yeah. What did you do with? Oh, my God. Food.

Starting point is 00:08:36 Yeah. He's so much better at it than me. Oh, whatever. Rest of peace, Chris Farley. Different. Oh, man. Yeah, the energy, that was a, so my whole career, you know, I was a young, handsome comedian, which was unusual.

Starting point is 00:08:54 and so I had agents throw me into, I even had a, my agent was a modeling agency and they would submit me for stuff. Commercials, I was doing auditions for commercials, and I never booked anything. 400 times minimum, I walked into a audition, you know, got all ready, you know, read the part, got all dressed up in the part, I would go drive through Hollywood and park and go in and sit and wait. 400 or more times. And, you know, if any direction was given to me, it was more energy. Let's try that again, more energy. And that was just, I wasn't able to do that.

Starting point is 00:09:40 I was never able to do that. Well, you are. That is part of what makes your comedy good, I think, is kind of the understated. It's like you don't know what's coming because you're so understained. Like, some people are so heavy. handed in the delivery it's like right you know i feel the sledgehammer coming before you even swing it with you it's like everything's right here and so and then it's like and then it's like for me it makes it that much more funny because then i think that's what makes it to live hit hard for me is because it's

Starting point is 00:10:18 like you don't ever change like the monetary like you know but you're like but then you're die and laugh it because the subject matter is hilarious. Thank you. I want the audience to enjoy trying to sniff out where the joke is. I don't want to. A lot of comedians also will use their hands to deliver or their head. They'll nod.

Starting point is 00:10:43 I watch Chris Rock's entire last comedy special on Netflix and I don't know if next time you watch it or if anyone watches when he tells the joke, he goes like this. Every punchline. Not even need it. It's coming. I don't even think he knows he's doing it, but I try to just tell the joke and let the audience figure out if they like it or not on their own. Yeah, and I think a lot of people don't like it. But I see that.

Starting point is 00:11:16 And there's something about you that's like, I don't know if self-deprecation is right. I don't know if that's part of it, but sort of like, I'm up here to tell you these things, and I'm not going to make it funny to you. It's either going to be funny or not. I'm just going to say it. And like, but it is funny. It's like, that's part of what it makes it the whole stick, whether it's a stick or it's having you sitting here talking with me, people, people that listen to this that didn't go watch your stuff, you are kind of that guy. So it's like it's not even an app. Okay. No, I don't even think.

Starting point is 00:11:53 I'm sure you turn it on. Like, I know you're an entertainer. Like, I mean, I know there's like buttons you push and do all that. But like, it, it feels natural. I, I, I, I, I do turn it up. I turn it up for interviews, stand up, and when I have guests over. But it's, it's just, yeah, I, hmm, I've tried. I, God, I've burned all the footage, but when I first started, I tried every different style of comedy.

Starting point is 00:12:31 I tried to mimic all of my heroes in comedy and just didn't feel right. And this just feels, this is how I'm going to do it. Thank you. This is the only way I feel comfortable telling jokes. I think the thing that I do, that, uh, makes. makes it funnier is I, the language I use. Yeah, I definitely try to use language that people can relate to, for sure. Yeah. I know, and I read about your background and stuff, like the journey into the business. You were set up and groomed for a lot of different things, comedy not being one of them.

Starting point is 00:13:19 Yeah. I'd love to talk a little bit about that. Um, love my dad, but, and my dad, I had a, I had a dad. I don't know if you're a dad of this variety, um, but he, um, he was a high school counselor. He's a retired high school counselor. And so, you know, for a living, he, he got kids jobs and got them in school and, and figured out their careers. And so at an early age, my dad was figuring out my career path. And he was also my, my, My dad was my baseball coach for my baseball team. He was my, if he wasn't the coach, if he couldn't get the job as coach, he would stand right next to the coach and eventually become the assistant coach by just virtue of being there every day next to him. And my dad had the keys to the field, the park, and to the big shed in every park usually

Starting point is 00:14:23 has a shed with all the baseball equipment. Oh, yeah. And all the soccer. Yeah. So my dad had the batting, the pitching machine and all the gear. So every weekend, my dad would take me to play baseball at the park and teach me soccer and lacrosse and hockey. And, you know, I was groomed for hockey.

Starting point is 00:14:48 I played, I remember I, I never got to. My kids, my kids, my first. friends were all playing hockey and I wanted to play hockey and my dad goes, okay, let's play hockey. And he immediately put me in training camps. And I was in training camp for so long that when I finally actually got into hockey, the first time I ever played a hockey game, I didn't know what was going on. Who are these guys? Who are these adults in black and white striped shirts getting in my way while I'm trying to do my circles? And, you know, like it was so, I was just groomed a lot by my father.

Starting point is 00:15:25 He raised me very closely. And so, and then I remember one day I said, I want to do comedy. And he just didn't want to hear it, you know. He didn't even hear it. He just changed the subject. He didn't even acknowledge that I said it. And this went on for years because he, you know, he had put in all this work on me, you know. Like, my dad picked all my.

Starting point is 00:15:53 my college courses. I brought home my calendar for college, and I woke up next morning. He had filled it all out. He's like, here you go. Go take this to your school and enjoy college. Do you think that was because, in a way, that was his career, what he was good at, and he was directing kids, so he wanted to make sure he did that for his son? or was it like the product of him not maybe getting or doing what he wanted to do or not having that in his life?

Starting point is 00:16:29 Or was it just purely like his way? I think it's a bit of both. I think my dad's father was a wartime kid. My dad, my dad was a wartime kid, but he was born during the war, I guess, War II. But that was a time after World War II where people were, you know, they were having to ration everything and be very careful and save and be cautious. And so my dad's a very cautious guy. And stand-up comedy is, is the most, it's irresponsible.

Starting point is 00:17:06 It's wild. It's, especially, you know, I think it was 1993 or something when I decided I wanted to do comedy. So it wasn't really And one's not a lot of Now that anyone could be a comedian But back then it was like It just It just wasn't a good career choice

Starting point is 00:17:28 So definitely because that's He's like I'm an expert This is what I do for a living So that's definitely part of it But I think also because He wanted me to have job security He wanted me to be safe Yeah

Starting point is 00:17:43 He loved me very much and he wanted what's best for me. But I just saw it as being close-minded, and so I ignored him and ran away. He ran away to Los Angeles. I'm sure that upset the Apple Card a little bit, or was it like, did he love you through it, or was it like a little bit of disowning?

Starting point is 00:18:12 There was love, but it was always, you know, I wasn't doing well. That didn't help. You know. So you did. Hey, look what I did. Yeah. No, it was a lot of, it was a lot of just not talking to him because I didn't have anything to report.

Starting point is 00:18:31 And he would always, you know, remind me that if I ever want to come back, he knows a guy in the Plumbers Union. And, you know, he can get started right away. Or we can go. We can get you back in school. and I got you. I got you covered, son. Just come up here and I'll take care of you. I mean, I appreciate your old dad, but I'm kind of, I'm, you know,

Starting point is 00:18:56 and I can't speak for your, you know, but I'm glad you're a comedian. You know, we need more comedy, you know, like, not everybody can deliver it. So I'm glad you didn't go back to plumbing. Plumbing, bro. I'm six, five. Yeah, me too. That's a first.

Starting point is 00:19:15 That's first time. I'm exactly even... Can you imagine being a plumber? Excuse me, I'm going to sneeze. Can you imagine being a plumber at our size? No. Even inside, I cover my nose. Yes.

Starting point is 00:19:32 Bless you. Yeah, I'm too big for plumbing. So, thank you. Yeah, I... Oh, man, I just couldn't... I knew that if I went back, I just would be miserable. You know, so kept going. Get a little feedback every once in a while.

Starting point is 00:19:53 Just, you know, I feel like that's in life, too. If you keep going every once in a while when you think it's over and you're just going to quit, you know, a comedian would say you're funny. And sometimes it was a comedian of notoriety. And that was just like, you know, like I remember Bob Sagitt was at an open mic when I first started. And he said, that's a really funny joke you did about that. And I said, thank you. so honored or flattered. And he goes, I'm where he goes.

Starting point is 00:20:23 If you just, you could just add like, and then I fucked her in the ass at the end of it. I think that would. I was like. Did it have anything with the joke or was it just totally like what he was saying? Like, if you add that anything, it becomes funny. It was, it's just Bob Sagitt's take on it. And I don't know if anyone's ever seen Bob before. Rest in peace, Bob.

Starting point is 00:20:45 He was a very filthy comedian. And so he gave his version of that joke to me as a gift. And I thought that was so nice. But I had no intention of saying it or using it. He was. The irony of him being so filthy is, you know, doing America's Funniest Home videos, which, you know, like the most, I don't know,

Starting point is 00:21:05 neutered show of all time as far as like family friendly and everything else. Yeah. I don't think it had. At full house. Yeah. Full house. Oh, yeah. Everything on TV was so.

Starting point is 00:21:16 family oriented and then to standup is filthy. Yes. Yeah. I don't know if you, in today's age, if you could get away with those two sides. Everybody's so damn woke and like, if you were that on,

Starting point is 00:21:31 if you were that on social media or stand up, you couldn't possibly have, you know, Little House on the Prairie or whatever, you know, like any wholesome TV show. Yeah, comedy is that once business that,

Starting point is 00:21:45 it doesn't withstand the test of time like music. It constantly has to adapt to society. Yeah. Right? That's right. We can't. So, like, when you watch old comedy, like, I have, I have old comedy in my garage. So whenever I'm working in the garage, I play, like, Kinnison and stuff.

Starting point is 00:22:08 Yeah. And the stuff, yeah, the stuff he says you, he could not. say. But that makes it even funnier to me. It's like, oh my God. Like, we said this. People are laughing. So it's not just that he said it, but everyone agreed.

Starting point is 00:22:27 Yes. And thinking about, like, the old TV shows, like Blazing Saddles and like, like, even Samford and Son. Go watch Sanford and Son and like, you know, like. Right. I mean. Television, yeah, that's right. The show, same thing. And watching,

Starting point is 00:22:43 I don't know, old Chevy Chase movies and he's like one of my. Oh, yeah. And old Chevy Chase, old Richard Pryor. Yeah. Oh, Richard Pryor. Oh, my God. It's like.

Starting point is 00:22:55 So, so many movies would not get made today and most of them are comedy. Yeah. That's right. Yeah. I mean, yeah. What's it been like coming through. Yeah, go ahead. Social media world.

Starting point is 00:23:09 I mean, you've, your career is kind of blossomed, you know, in this world of it was all stand up i mean like 93 94 like late in 2000s i mean you've you kind of covered the gamut here of like the channels for distribution of comedy like what's that evolution bit like for you well i think it started with my space uh that that was probably my first experience in social media and that was dain cook dang cook blew up my space right Right? Yeah. And Tia Tequila.

Starting point is 00:23:47 They showed it as not a social space, but as a marketing platform to comedians. So we all started, as young comedians, we all started building our MySpace profile to showcase us as comedians and not as just regular everyday people. I've now I now have Facebook Instagram Twitter YouTube

Starting point is 00:24:14 a website TikTok TikTok Cameo I look at my phone and what else you got here Twitter

Starting point is 00:24:29 Twitter I said I said I said Twitter I got yeah you got like 12 platforms It's like everybody trying to keep up. Waze.

Starting point is 00:24:38 I got Ways. Do you follow me on Ways? No. I'd be scary if you followed me on Ways. I'd say, leave me alone. You're in the car with me? I'm right behind you. I'm a big fan and I'm right behind you.

Starting point is 00:24:55 There's a big dude on the side coming up on the right. Yes. We're all big fans. Just leave me. alone. Jesus. But how's that changed your, the business of comedy for you? Like, I mean, I know it's a lot to keep up with, but I mean, is that like good evolution

Starting point is 00:25:15 or bad evolution from, okay, the only one, the way anyone sees or here's Lachlan's jokes is in person. So there's huge onus on in person stuff versus the digital medium. Yes. it's, I find it to be complete, so far, it's been completely separate. So it's been great. Social media

Starting point is 00:25:40 has been awesome in that man, I get so much wonderful warm feedback. You know, people touch their screen twice. That's what I get from them. Or they send me a picture of a face with two tears out the side.

Starting point is 00:25:56 It's very nice. I appreciate it. But it doesn't at all replace the faces in the audience and meeting people in person. Like, that's what I really love. And so I give a lot to social media to, because it's a very giving thing. But I feel like the give and take is much more equal

Starting point is 00:26:21 when I have a live show. And I get to see them laughing as opposed to a picture of a circle with two little drops of water. Like, I'm, I just... I'm going to give you some rockets or something, like something just different. Give me some rockets to, yeah. At least use the emoji.

Starting point is 00:26:41 I'm giving it to you. I'm going to, like, put that on every feed going forward. So you're going to know it's me. You're going to see my name and my blue checkmark I had before I could buy it. And you'll know with that rocket emoji. Thank you. I... I also know there's people out there that just like everything that I do, too.

Starting point is 00:27:04 And that is tough, too, because I'm also doing R&D here on these things, right? When I send these clips out, I want to find out if they're working or not. And if you just like everything, God, I'm killing myself with this comment. And I don't gauge whether or not it's... I get it. But you'll know which ones like more than others, and that should tell you. If you get 300 likes on... average and something you put out there gets 900 likes but then something else gets 150 that's kind of

Starting point is 00:27:36 right even if all 150 were positive emojis it it tells you that uh it landed a little flat you're right you're absolutely right or you just gonna get my cell phone number when this ends you're gonna just start texting me i'll give you the real feedback i'll you know we'll have like a scale of you know whatever that money sure sure Stars, let's do the star system. I'll take it. Yes. I love the star system.

Starting point is 00:28:07 So I, dude, I went from at the beginning of this year, I had 8,000 followers on Instagram, for example. And now it's at like 40, 40 something thousand. Yep. And it's because I hired these guys. I hired these kids who reached out to me and they're like, let me do it for you. and I said, sure. And so I send them the clips and they cut them and send them back to me. And then I look at them.

Starting point is 00:28:36 And if I like them, I post them. And it's been a big help because it takes me to make a clip because I have the editing software, but it was taking me, you know, I would say three hours for a clip. Of course, I could go any further without mentioning the official skincare partner of the Radcast. Look, I'm all about routines. I got to have routines now. I've got schedules. What I'm going to do? Now, I've got a men's care routine at night. This is what I do. I wash the face. I put the face lotion on. I put on the icon eye serum. This is the best eye serum I've ever used. I actually have the dark circles gone from under the eyes and then the good.

Starting point is 00:29:21 The serum for the gods, as I like to say, or just from Jackson, Wyoming. But it's all natural and it works. you that glow that you always want both morning and night and look i've you know i'm getting the point i'm in my mid-forties the fine lines are showing up and i need a routine i need like things that i can repeat and that's what this does the whole skin care system and you don't want to miss out on this body bar smells like a man hey i want to smell like a man not a woman i'm not using my wife's soap i did a man's soap and this latherer's great use that in the shower get out at night then i use the whole system and i'm telling you the icon faith that that's probably been the biggest thing is like you know you start to get the dark circles it is what it is you get older it happens but now i'm starting

Starting point is 00:30:09 to feel younger it look younger my wife's even noticing and it's all about routines maybe go to caldera labs dot com use rad ryan and you'll get 20% off i only support what works and let me tell you It works. It's made a difference. I've been using it for about two months. Used it before I promoted it. I'm like, all right, let me try this stuff. I've never looked better. It can only get so good.

Starting point is 00:30:34 I need all the help I can get. And Caldera Labs is the official skincare provider of the Radcast and Ryan offered. And I hope you'll give a shout out. Yeah. I'm glad you found someone, but now that we're buddies, we're friends. I have friends. I'll let friends spend three hours ahead in the video. not like yeah you know never again and they and they do it better than me yeah and so

Starting point is 00:30:59 they're hair specialists and they're it's affordable I mean I you know you found the the path you like these guys oh I don't know who you're using it's okay but we do a lot better you do I should send me your guy I yeah I um it's funny because they're in Arizona and I go I'll take a meeting with them and I'll see that, you know, it's 110 degrees there. And they're just stuck in this apartment or their house. And secretly, I'm like, great. It's just perfect scenario for me that you can't leave.

Starting point is 00:31:36 Yeah. Just go here and edit. Yeah. But. No, I've every. Yeah. Big team. But this stuff's pretty good.

Starting point is 00:31:45 I'm not trying to undercut them in the middle of the podcast. I just, I think, but I'm more happy that you've realized that you, you didn't need to like spend three hours yourself on you know editing stuff well that step was a huge um that they posted one clip or i posted a clip they cut for me that um this clip particular has been uh you know i've been telling this joke and i like the joke but i didn't realize on social media that it would garner like that much positive feedback. Yeah. I don't know the algorithms or anything, but, you know, I post a clip every day.

Starting point is 00:32:27 And I like them all. I like everything I posted. It's coming for me. So I'm trusting that I, this has my certified guaranteed I like it on it. So when anyone goes viral, I'm like, great. What about all the other ones? But this one clip is about, I don't know if you've seen it, it's about how like I love shrimp. Anyway, it started an argument online between people.

Starting point is 00:33:01 It's what's that called. It's definitely polarized people. And they're arguing on my feet, like over this debate. And it's fun. become fun for me to read these people. I don't partake at all because I'm done. My work is done. You guys can do it. You know what I call that? You know, it's the best kind of performing content that a lot of people shy away from. And you may not have even intended it. Agitational content. Yeah. Okay. That's secret sauce right there. That's a freebie. The other's going to require you call and at least tell me a joke and make me laugh. Then I'll give you anything you want. You know, you may be like to be free. Thank you. Agitational content.

Starting point is 00:33:50 Agitational. And polarizing is definitely what it causes, but it's like if you agitate, you usually break through. Yeah, see, I'm not, I'm not agitating anybody with the half sandwich bit. No. Like, other than the guy who came up with it, nobody is, nobody is, every once in a while someone will be like, I like the half sandwich. And you know what they say to me, Ryan?

Starting point is 00:34:15 So, you know, sometimes I'm not that hungry. And I'm like, well, don't fucking eat. Just don't, why are you going to a restaurant? Have a cup of tea. Yeah. But no, they have to eat. Half a sandwich. I want a cup.

Starting point is 00:34:32 I want a cup and a soup, not a bowl. I got to have a cup and half a sandwich. Yeah. Give me a hot dog, but take a bite out of it first. Yeah. I don't want to eat the whole thing. So just give it to me. And that could be part of it.

Starting point is 00:34:47 It could be more visual joke, you know, like, yeah. But the, but socials, but have you seen a correlation with social media and crowds or people like coming to shows or anything like that? Or is it just totally separate? That's a good question. You're very smart man. By the way, I like it when people say to me, good question. To me, I no longer need to hear the answer. Like, I'm full.

Starting point is 00:35:13 but I'm glad you asked me that I still need it I haven't but I just started adding my show button at the end of the clips and I'm hoping

Starting point is 00:35:34 but no I haven't seen any anything no correlation yet but hold on man like you need to call to action every video, you should have a call to action. You should add, I mean, it's a marketing and business show.

Starting point is 00:35:50 So we'll get into one of two things. You need to have a news, a way to capture everybody's emails. You need to turn followers into people. The way you turn them into people is you get their email or the phone number. And phone numbers are still kind of weird. Even if there's texting now, like it gets a little weird. You want people going, oh, they want my phone number. But get their email address, captured like it, at your web address so that then at every, every show you have, you send out a very simple email telling them where the show is and where it is. And you never know,

Starting point is 00:36:23 yeah, somebody might be in Timbuk 2, Arizona and somebody might be in Virginia and your shows in Minnesota, but you never know when they're traveling or if they know people there. So you should always, your call to action on every video should be, I've got a live special going on YouTube. it's $10 or if you're selling something or you should at least go sign up for you know if you enjoy

Starting point is 00:36:48 this i'd love to put you on my list for VIP jokes and experiences okay see the the Lachlan VIP list the secret list yeah secrets where I tell you my secret dude I got all the tricks man we'll we'll we'll we'll take this offline the uh Thanks, man. Yeah, but you do. Yeah, you can start tying it to it. And like, now you've got the audience. You've been 44,000.

Starting point is 00:37:16 You're starting to get, you know, scale. So you can activate that. And I think you, I don't know what you're following is on TikTok, but you got to, you start, that should start popping for you. If you're doing the right content. I haven't looked at your stuff over there. I just always on my feed on Instagram. I could do better on TikTok. TikTok's angrier at me.

Starting point is 00:37:37 Like, though, I find that the. They're more critical. They're critical. They're more critical. Of like censoring your jokes? I just called, I did a post, posted something about like how fentanyl. Oh, that was a very. Thank you.

Starting point is 00:37:56 About that on the, I told Cameron and Sawyer, I was like literally told I told your joke, you know. If I can tell your joke and like they're chuckling a little bit, you know, it's a good joke because they didn't have to hear you hear it say it. but like it's friggin hilarious because it's so true. Right. So our audience, let's, I'm not making it up. You don't have to get into character here, but I want you to share the bit a little bit. Every time I hear a warning about fentanyl and the dangers, it always, it sounds like they want me to try fentanyl. It'll, guy will come on the news.

Starting point is 00:38:36 I can't stop fentanyl. It's so dangerous. It's 50 times more powerful than heroin and it's cheaper than crack cocaine. And you can buy it anywhere now in America. So don't do it. I'm like, you know. That sounds like marketing line sales line all the time. Don't do it.

Starting point is 00:38:56 It's the most popular drug on the streets and it tastes just like chocolate. Don't do it. Pairs well with a chardonnay. So apparently there is a. a scene and I had to even go watch it. There's three different comments from TikTok where this guy's stealing from a movie with John C. Riley where it's kind of like a takeoff. Oh, Walk Hard.

Starting point is 00:39:22 Walk hard. Is that it? So, and there's a scene in Walk Hard, which is very funny. Tim Meadows is smoking weed and John C. Riley's character wants some. And he's like, don't, you don't want this. And he's like, why is it? Will it kill me? And he goes, no, it's, it won't kill you.

Starting point is 00:39:41 And they're like, he's like, was, is it addictive? And he's like, no, it won't make you. Like, you know what I mean? Like it was, it's very, it's parallels this bit. Sure. And, and, you know, when you do, when you do stuff like that, they don't realize that, first of all, you know, they're totally different. This is, and also, it's not like I'm making this bit up. watch a news clip on fentany it's exactly what the news people say yeah i'm only taking it from the

Starting point is 00:40:15 like they'll interview of police officers like i can't we can't seem to stop fentanyl it it it is the most popular drug on the streets somehow and we can't stop it and people don't understand that it's 50 time well maybe stop bragging about it that maybe maybe you guys are the problem like like maybe they need some you know like the center for drug what is it the drug American drug anti-drug foundation whoever makes the ad counsel commercials yeah maybe one of the team that comes up with these warnings should actually be an addict yeah you know maybe you should run it by some addicts first and see if it's working exactly so he was turning you off or turning you on. Yeah. It's 100 times more powerful than, uh, then, uh, what's it called?

Starting point is 00:41:13 It's the one you get in the hospital. They always, no one they get in the hospital. They go, it's 100 times more morphine. It's 100 times more powerful than morphine. Yeah. If I'm an addict, that sounds great. Yeah, exactly. So they, uh, and the only people that are always sensitive probably. And I get it. But at the same time, a lot of people are being impacted by certain negative things. And it's like, and so that you can always, I'm sure as a comedian and not just that joke, but any joke, it's like, if someone wants to be offended or wants to take it to the, you know, the other side of any subject matter that you're talking about that could have had a negative,

Starting point is 00:41:55 you know, like that's probably never ending, I'm sure. And TikTok too is like a, it's just like this crazy. chick, you know, there's this side chick. I got my Instagram girl. She's supportive and she's consistent. And then I go on TikTok and it's like right away. I don't even follow anyone and I got tits in my face and it's loud and it's just crazy. And so I don't put as much effort into that one for sure.

Starting point is 00:42:29 Oh, it's definitely a rabbit hole of all sorts of things. It's so like, what happened? Where are you? Where am I? You get in the vortex. I had a few drinks. I watched one video. I'm on my couch. I'm 20 more.

Starting point is 00:42:45 I'm in my bedroom. I'm 30 more. It's the next day. Yeah. I'm vortex if you get it. If you really, I don't, when I first was on there, that would happen to me. I'd be like, wait, I'd look at my clock and it's like, where's that 40 minutes go? And now I just don't really get on there as much anymore because I don't have 40.

Starting point is 00:43:04 I don't want to lose 40 minutes of my life. And it's gotten kind of random, like you said. But a lot of you were on there. TikTok, also Instagram, when you open it, the volume's off. TikTok, when you open it, the volumes cranked. Yeah. Right? I can't open the door and have someone just talking to me right away, right?

Starting point is 00:43:25 I need a minute to just, let me just, let me see the video with the volume off first. Yeah. You need the doctor to show you the finger, then put the glove arm, and then put the Vaseline. You need a little like warm up before they uses that fist. By the way, the finger, we still checking cancer with fingers. Can we get a computer? Can we find some technology with the prostate exam? What's one of your like favorite shows?

Starting point is 00:43:59 I mean, like, I know you got the special. and, you know, certainly talk about that, but like maybe what your best or most memorable live performance. Oh, yeah, the perfect set. You know, I had one at a place called Whiskey Bar. I think it was called a Whiskey Bar. It was just a set, but Pat and Oswald was, he went on before me. And I mean, it was like Bill Burr and Tiffany Haddish and Pat Oswald. So it was exciting and the crowd was incredible.

Starting point is 00:44:42 And I remember after my set, like, just like online too where I just, I post what I like and I don't know what's going to happen. So I just did my set like normal and Pat and Oswald came up and he corners me. And everyone's standing around wondering, wanting to hear what he's saying, but only I got to hear it. And he said, who are you? And how have I never heard of you?

Starting point is 00:45:12 And he went and broke down one of my jokes and said, this is what's so wonderful about that joke. And he just loved me for that minute. And it was just a really, and I grew up watching Pat and Oswald. I remember being a young comedian and having the, the DVD of comedians of comedy and watching him and Sarah Silverman, Brian Passain,

Starting point is 00:45:42 Zach Galfanakis, I just loved him. And to have that love given back to me and just not saying a word too, just keeping my mouth shut and just listening, that to me was a great experience. And I had a great set too, so I felt, I didn't feel like it was it wasn't real. I mean, I don't have to tell you this. I mean, like, as your quasi-unificial non-agent, I'm going to tell you, like, you draw on that at any time you feel like, yeah, do I belong?

Starting point is 00:46:23 Am I heading the right path? I got this troll telling me that he thinks this isn't funny. I mean, you have one of your icons, like, that sat down and, like, broke down your joke like you should draw on that and then know like you know you belong thanks man yeah yeah um i don't know do you have a voice in your head that that you go to at times or a few yeah two or three what what kind of voices it is it like a two or three right me too no i mean it's you know i have the the the i'm not an emotional person but i have i have the i'm not an emotional person but I have the little one that's like, you know, that tone it down.

Starting point is 00:47:08 You need to understand how this is impacting people. You need to. And then I have the go. Like, you know, you pussy, you go, go, go. You know, like, I mean, you know, this is always driving me. Like, you got one life to live, damn it. What are you doing? And it's, you know, he's probably not that much of a drill sergeant, but it's just, you know.

Starting point is 00:47:30 The drill sergeant voice is a man. It's a, it's maybe, I don't know if it's all men's, but it's definitely a straight man's inner voice that we, I use. Yeah. I like that voice. A lot of people would say that's, okay, good. Yeah. A lot of people would say it's an unhealthy voice. I know.

Starting point is 00:47:49 And it's not the ego voice. I think that would be the third one. It's more that I feel like that's the healthy one that's like keeping me on the straight and arrow and like keeping me good father, good dad, good business person, like go. go, go. You've got every opportunity. Don't let anything go. You know, it's more, I'm, but then there's the ego voice of like, for the wrong reasons or like getting caught up in the, oh, you know, this is what Johnny would think about that. And you know that you really should, you know, if you really want to look the best or do the best or how, you know, like there's that

Starting point is 00:48:27 ego voice that I try to like, I've gotten better. That's what comes with wisdom at time. Like when I was 25, that voice, like, dominated. You know, not voice. I've pushed that voice way back, you know, but it happens. Life pushed that voice way back. That too, you know. I have that voice that goes, it used to go, this is the big, this is it, buddy. This is the big moment.

Starting point is 00:48:55 This is every, this is going to be, get ready. You're going to be catapulted to start them right here. everything is about to happen for you and now it's um it's the it's the it's the right voice it's the chill this isn't about that this is just about having fun it's another step present yeah everything's laddering you know i mean it's the journey man i you know that's the more people i talk to at all different levels in all different fields And like the highs of the highs and lows and lows, like the journey, like as soon as you get there, you're not happy anyway. So you need to keep the journey going, you know, and you look, I know, everybody's got to eat and you want to, hey, I'm sure there's a car, nice car, whatever your thing is, like something, you know, like we all want.

Starting point is 00:49:51 But, you know, as soon as everybody loves you, then somebody, it just means that there's going to be that many more. more, you know, negative Johnny voices, too, you know, like, so there's always going to be something. But I just, you got to enjoy the journey is kind of that I think that what I hear from more people and like appreciate every moment. And some of this stuff sounds cliche and like bullshit, but like, but there's truth to it. You know, like, if you get, if you, if you, what fun is it if you, if you're just landing somewhere and never going anywhere else? Like, you got to, you know, enjoy every.

Starting point is 00:50:31 step of the journey. The journey. Yeah, I've been saying it's all practice a lot. Everything's just practice. And so when I fail, I can say it's practice. And when I succeed, I got to remind myself it's still just practice. What's, I mean, what's making it now for you? Like, you obviously have crossed some roads, you know, like,

Starting point is 00:51:01 Like, you're doing some specials. You're out there. You've got 50,000 followers roughly on Instagram. You're getting popularity, some things. But, like, what are the goals for you? And what does really getting over mean to Lockland? Like, what is that, like, going on a late night show? Like, what is good, you know, the pattern of you.

Starting point is 00:51:25 It would make you happy. I mean, it's funny. forced that you brought up the late show and in the late late shows and the tonight shows i i i i pounded on those doors and they just never opened for me for the most part um so i've had to kind of and that's part of finding my voice too um but for me uh so you know it'd be nice to perform uh to uh to put to have sold out shows to me that would be great to be great rate. That would be incredible to, because I've been performing a lot and I go to these clubs and they take a risk on me because they think I'm funny and they have to sit there in the back

Starting point is 00:52:15 and cut three waitresses on the, and give me some stupid excuse like, oh, it's tax time. So people aren't really going out this time of year or something's, you know, it's St. Patty's Day next week. So people are, you know, they'll just bullshit for me. But it would be, you know, to me making it would be every seat in the house is full, you know. We're going to teach you how to do that. And it's not because you've got comedy already. Now it's like, but you got to bring them with you. That's where the social and everything else, like you got to turn those followers into raving fans and like getting them in the circle.

Starting point is 00:53:01 and keeping giving you know you got to have like the lockland nights you know like whatever it is like but you have to nurture and then then they'll fill it up for you and then they because the reality is a lot of those places don't have the marketing arm like they'll throw your one video that may they may or may not have been thoughtful about which one they grabbed on their Instagram feed and lockland patterson will be here this weekend we're so excited their their marketing sucks and then you know you're standing there and like you're like well why didn't they bring you know am i not funny or whatever nobody even wanted to come and you thought they're giving the excuses but when you can start commanding and bring in your own tribe and it's not you're not

Starting point is 00:53:44 it doesn't mean that you're going to bring them alone to every show like you can fill out 5,000 seats wherever any time but hell if you had if you could if you could if you could count on 20 percent of them, you know, are going to show up or be there or tell people and work for you with you, that's when you get powerful. Okay. Well, you nailed it with regards to the fact that their marketing is often the issue. Yeah. And I rely so heavily on their marketing and I would love to not.

Starting point is 00:54:26 I love that to not even be important. Just send people my marketing for me. Well, exactly, but you can get there. I mean, so selling out shows, what's like, is there like a theater? Is there like a man, the Holy Grill? I mean, theaters would be incredible. I get the joy and I'm so grateful that I get to open every once in a while for some of my favorites. I just got to open for Daniel Tosh down by you in Florida, in Atlanta, and in Tennessee.

Starting point is 00:55:08 And in theaters, he's performed in these massive theaters. And I'm going to get to open for Nargazzi up in Pennsylvania next month. But so, yeah, I want bigger audiences. I'd love theaters. I'm trying to take a step by step. step you got to fill the bars that i'm in right now first before i start doing that but that's always i mean i've had the goal of theaters for 10 years i've been writing that in my journal uh and so i mean i got with i was in last comic standing a while back and i made it to the top five

Starting point is 00:55:55 finalists so we toured across the country uh doing theaters the top five finalists and so we did like 60 theaters and i just was hooked ever since then i i i love i love how they look i love how they smell i just love walking out on a massive stage and seeing that empty room and being like it's just so hard it feels it feels so good when they're all sat and then You know, have you, do you, why don't, that seems like a pretty big accomplishment. Like, why, is there a reason that you step, like, edit, that's not in your bio. Like, you don't have that, like, anywhere. Is it purposeful that you don't, like, attach to that at all?

Starting point is 00:56:42 Last Comic Standing? Yeah. I think it's in my bio. I mean, that's the other thing. What, what do I want? Well, I'd like a bigger credit than that. That's my biggest credit. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:56:54 So I'm searching for something bigger than that. But right now, that is the biggest thing that I've done. And it was, you know, that's coming up on probably nine years ago. You were top five in that. How many people like was the potential, you know, number? Well, they start, they started with a thousand. Or they said thousands. When I arrived, okay, so I was walking dogs.

Starting point is 00:57:22 I was just like a, I had stopped doing. the road because I couldn't I couldn't it wasn't paying enough yeah um and I was making money dog walking and just doing shows in LA and being home and I was excited to be home and doing local shows and so I stopped doing and then they asked me to come audition for last comic standing and I told you my auditioning track record I didn't want to do it so I ignored it and then my agent called and said you're going to go to this audition I said nah and he goes can I ask you this? And I said, sure. And he goes, what are you doing? What else are you doing? And I said, that's a good point. I'll go. So I went and I was in a room. They put me in a room with a hundred

Starting point is 00:58:10 comedians in a giant room. And they just had cameras all over the room. And they just watched us and filmed it. And it was, it felt horrible. I look around and there's so many comedians and they all seemed very confident that they were going to win this show. And I didn't. I didn't feel that way. I felt like my comedy career was, you know, not that good. Like I said, I had submitted to all the late shows and no one got back to me. And so I had all these, I had put it all this effort into this business and given up on it. And now it was dragging me back in with all these young confident comedians. And I went in the audition and it was so hard.

Starting point is 00:59:08 It was three people or four people in the audience. It was the producers. Producers and they were in their books just looking like this. And each comedian would go one up, I won up there and do their bits. And it was like every, pardon me, every fucking show I had. been doing in LA. So it was easy. It was like, oh, I'm just doing a shitty show. Okay, well, that's what I do anyway. So I was in my, I was in my element. It was very comfortable. Yeah. So it was like,

Starting point is 00:59:42 perfect. If they're just drinking glasses and like, you know, some loud, a blender and, you know, an obnoxious girl or guy talking louder than they should be. You'd been really at home. Yeah. And so they asked me to come back and they just kept every week. They just kept asking me to come back. And that went on for, I mean, the budget on that thing was incredible. I met, I mean, they had a, every week they had a celebrity guest. So I met, I got, I got to be mentored by, oh man, I got to be mentored by Howie Mandel, Jeff Ross, J.B. Smooth was the host.

Starting point is 01:00:26 I loved J.B. Smooth. Chick from Kirby, enthusiasm. And, I don't know if I got to forgot her name, unfortunately. You like Larry David, like that kind of stuff? Yeah, that's my kind of humor. He writes like me. Yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:00:46 I have the same, I have very, many of the same complaints about society as he does for sure. Most of them don't get outside the house, thankfully. Yeah. He has an opportunity to, a vehicle to share these things safely, but a lot of my opinions about things have to stay behind these four walls. Yeah. Well, yeah. Maybe that's the problem.

Starting point is 01:01:17 Yeah. You have to just agitational content. Thank you. I definitely have some written. I don't know. You can text them to me. I'll tell you. I'll be honest with you.

Starting point is 01:01:29 I'll be like, okay, not quite that agitational. Whoa. Or, yes. I'll send you clips before I post them for sure. Thank you. But still, you know, top five of last comic standing. I mean. Top three.

Starting point is 01:01:50 Top three? Yeah, they did a final episode. They just picked one of three. Okay. So I've made it to the last episode. That's how I put it. Dude. I know that I imagine being a professional, you know, that like, okay, that's all the footnote.

Starting point is 01:02:08 I mean, it's still a big fucking deal, though. You know? It was awesome. People were shouting at me walking down the street and in the airport. I remember having an issue with my bank and I called. And the guy goes, is this Lachlan Patterson from Last Comic Standing? And I'm like, yeah, and he goes, don't worry. I'll take care of it.

Starting point is 01:02:31 You probably got that celebrity treatment. Yeah. It was awesome. I want that. I want that again. I want it because it faded, right? Because it wasn't my audience. It was NBC Last Comic Standing's audience.

Starting point is 01:02:45 And so I understand that with time, you know, next season's coming. They have a new season, a fresh new set of comedians. That audience needs to move on. because they're really they're fans of the show. Yeah, I'm going to argue with you, though. It's called borrowed interest. It's called scared leverage.

Starting point is 01:03:07 There's a, you carry that with you. It never goes away. And anytime that that shows on, you should be maximizing it. And you might go, oh, I'm using old accolades or what,

Starting point is 01:03:19 no, it's like it doesn't go away. You know, do you think that, uh, do you think Michael Jackson would, you know, like he would throw away one of his hits because it was 30 years later, you know, like, or anybody, or let's say vanilla ice.

Starting point is 01:03:36 Do you think he's happy or upset that he had that one hit? You know, like, it never diminishes the impact or what it took for that to happen, no matter how much time passes. But you can either choose to leverage it or not. And so... Right. Yeah. And leverage, too, is gratitude. And I think they go hand in hand.

Starting point is 01:04:05 So, yeah. It's on my bio. You know, it's the number one thing still. Yeah. So it's on there. I loved... Dude, I met so many great people. I feel like we get tall for hours, man.

Starting point is 01:04:26 I think we've, you know. I know. We've talked for exactly an hour. I think I've got you over the time limit. And what's, tell everybody that's listening. We'll have all this in the show notes, you know, all the places they can keep up with you, your website and all those things. Sure. Yeah, Lockland Patterson.com for all my show dates. Where are you going to be? I'll post a video. Come to Texas. I'll be like, dude, I was just in Texas last week. Come to, yeah, people say come to Vancouver. It doesn't make it for a month doing shows. Come to South Carolina. Please, I would love to.

Starting point is 01:05:06 I would love to. You have, what's the comedy club there? I'm going to actually. The comedy zone is Greenville. The comedy zone in Greenville. I perform there and I want to come back. So I am going to do that. I'm going to make that effort today.

Starting point is 01:05:23 I've done that for people when they say. I'll even show here. I got this, you know, social. house we'll have a special showing we've had comedians here we'll have a one night only locklin patterson we'll fill this mug out i'd love that i would love that i will come for that if you want to do that or or i'll reach out to the comedy zone i'll get your number and let's talk yeah we'll talk about all that i really appreciate you brother i know um people are going to go follow you and go take it out they're going to make the world a better place because

Starting point is 01:05:55 they're going to be smiling thanks man Thank you for all your positive feedback and help them lift me up for because I got to go carry a bunch of shit around the house right now. There you go. Hey, guys, you know where to find us? Theradcast.com. Search for Lachlan Patterson. That's L-A-C-H-L-A-N. And look, do yourself a favor.

Starting point is 01:06:18 Go find him on Instagram. It'll make your day because you'll be laughing. And you know what you'll do? You'll hit that share button 100 times and you'll go, damn, Ryan, that's right. I like being right because Lockland's funny. for Ryan Alford. I'll see you next time. To listen and watch full episodes, visit us on the web at the radcast.com or follow us on social media at our Instagram account,

Starting point is 01:06:41 the dot rad.com or at Ryan Alford. Stay radical.

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