Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S10 EP25: The Work / Life Balance Debate

Episode Date: May 20, 2025

More misadventures in parenting, life, and beyond with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe... In this episode the lads discuss the eternal battle of the work / life balance and how impossible it is to get right for any parent no matter their circumstances. Please follow and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available free everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. MAILING LIST: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Join the mailing list to be first to hear about live show dates and tickets, Parenting Hell merch and any other exciting news... A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Willicombe. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping. And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener, with advice and of course tales of parenting woe. Because let's be

honest there are plenty of times where none of us know what we're doing. Hello you're listening to Isaac, can you say Rob? Becket. Backbeat. And can you say Josh? Widdicombe. Widdicombe. Well done. That was one of my favourites, completely wrong ones. Yeah, it sounded like they'd speeded his voice up.

I thought it was a dog at the start. Josh, I'm sat like a woman who's been dumped from a rom-com. What do you mean? I'm holding my coffee, it's a bit cold in my room. I'm holding my coffee cup like it's a cup of soup. And I've got my legs crossed on the chair. Yeah, well, don't un... Ooh. That wasn't in cheer over here.

Yeah, a bit of thigh. Not great for audio, but guys, I feel vulnerable. Yeah, I'm gonna turn my camera off. Okay, because I'm getting too sexy. Oh no, it's because of the lag. I'm in Birmingham. You're in Birmingham. At a hotel.

Hi, Rob and Josh. This is our son Isaac who turned two last month. This is his first attempt, and we think it's a great effort. Love the podcast. Haven't missed an episode. Stay sexy and relatable, Tom, Rhian, and Isaac from Weybridge in Surrey.

I'm so stressed. You're stressed. You were we start before we start recording you went, came onto the zoom and you're fucking hell. I realized I haven't canceled our storage. Oh, and there's nothing in it. No, there is. Oh, but everything I was meant to do it at the end of last week and I didn't do it because I found out and get it out. And they I thought it was 14 days. So I was like, I'll cancel it and then I'll get a delivery person to take the stuff, the get it out. And they, I thought it was 14 days.

So I was like, I'll cancel it and then I'll get a delivery person to take the stuff, the remaining stuff out. So you canceled it, but forgot to get the stuff. No, no, no. So then they said on the phone, it's just seven days. So I thought, oh, I'll do it the other way because otherwise it's a bit tasty.

Listen to that fucking drilling. I can't hear that drilling by the way. All right. Is that Adrian? No, it's outside. So that's another thing I can't hear that drilling by the way. Is that Adrian? No, it's outside. So that's another thing I've got to do. I'm so tired Rob, I'm fucking fucked. What's up? What's going on? I've just had loads of work in the last

48 hours. You've been gigging? So I gigged. I was just really tired going into my gig on Tuesday. Both nights were in Hartford, which is just outside London. Yep. I had a doctor's appointment in the afternoon,

and then I recorded a podcast, and then I went straight to Hartford, and then I did the gig, and then I got home and I couldn't sleep. Right. No surprises. I'm sleeping on my daughter's floor at the moment. Still.

I know. You can't do all that work and sleep on the floor. Tell me about it, Rob. We're so close. So what's what are you waiting on? Curtains in my son's room. So that he'll leave your bedroom. Yeah. OK. God. Rose is away tonight, so I'm back in my room. Here we go. With back with your catchphrase. The catchphrase is back. Yeah. But with with my son in the bed with me and then my daughter

will have to go on the floor because she'll want to be in if he's in with me. Right. OK. Yeah, but with my son in the bed with me, and then my daughter will have to go on the floor because she'll want to be in if he's in with me. Right, okay. Oh, God. So, as soon as this podcast finishes, I'm going into her room to move the floor beds downstairs. So at least you'll get to sleep in your own bed tonight. Yeah, great. That's nice. After another gig, that'll be fun.

I said, I'll get in and my son will already be horizontal across the bed. God, I'm tired. and then yesterday. Go on I did Romesh's parenting show. Oh, what the TV show with your dad? Yeah with my dad. How was that? It was a lot of fun Is it stressful having to be on telly with your parents? Yes I find being on telly quite stressful anyway Presumably you've been asked to do this. Yeah, but I was... And you thought, oh right, you were gigging.

To be honest, I wasn't that keen on doing it anyway because I think it stressed me out too much. I find it stressful because you're kind of, when I do something like that now, because I want my dad to have a good time, do you know what I mean? And you're like, if I do something like that now, I'm confident that it'll go well. It doesn't all the time, but you're confident that and if it doesn't, I'll brush it off. Because I know generally it does go well. I don't want to be sit there while my dad's dying on his ass. And then it haunts him forever.

Yeah. The time he went on Robish's parents evening and didn't get any laughs and Dudu Mabusi fucking ripped it. Dudu Mabusi, was she on then? Oti's mom? Dudu Mabusi was on, yeah, yeah. She'd flown over from South Africa for it. Jesus Christ, look at that. And they didn't want to get me a cab from my house.

I'm joking, they would have. They would have, yeah. No, I was touring so I couldn't do it anyway, which actually was- and they didn't want to get me a cab from my house. I'm joking, they would have. They would have, yeah, they would have. No, I was touring, so I couldn't do it anyway, which actually was- Yeah, but it is quite, it is a different level of stress because you get there, also, you get there- I'd go mental immediately.

You get there, and normally then, I think I'll just sit in this fucking room on my own and just chill. But it's almost like you're hosting. You know when you're're hosting something you feel like you need to like make sure everyone's having a good time. You feel like anything like that. You're okay, dad. Yeah. What did he order? Do you have you ordered your takeaway for

lunch? Do you know what I mean? You just like so it's an extra level of stress. Well, I've never I love my parents to pieces. I've never been in the dressing room before a TV show and thought, you know what will make this better and easier? My mom and dad being here and bringing it on the stage. It's just a complex other set of stuff to deal with. Exactly. Yeah.

I think it's such a good show and it's brilliant. And Ramesh and his mama brilliant. It gives me a new respect for Ramesh working so much with his mom. He loves it, doesn't he? Yeah. He loves to challenge the man. The man who looks at a challenge and goes, I want it harder. Yeah. How could I make my life more difficult? I'm going to do a panel show of my mom and run

a marathon again. Drop me out. What are you going to do Rob? Neither of those things. A panel show alone and no marathon for me. Anyway. So he was, so it was, it was really fun. But then it was like one of those ones where you have to get into a car straight away and go back to Hartford. So was it a daytime record? Yeah, it was daytime record.

So then you had to get that night in a tour show last night. Oh my god, you must be... And then you came home and slept on a floor. Yeah, I'm fucked. And then Rose was away this morning, so I had to get up, rush the kids to do the school run to do these records. And then we've done this since 9am. I know.

Three, four hours. I'm fucking naked. And then you're back to Hartford. Yeah, no, I'm going to Black Heath tonight. I did Hartford Tuesday, Wednesday, and I'm in Black Heath tonight. Oh, God. So I've got this is the warm up tour. You're gonna be fucking cooked for the main one. I didn't realize how warm I'd be by this point as well. Fucking roasting, son. There's an added issue with the warm up tour, that the show's more

or less finished, right? So each time I'm getting to the venue and thinking, I'm not even really gonna learn much tonight. All I'm doing is the finished show for half price. That's all I'm doing. In an unseasonably warm room. It turns out, I spoke to my agent, it's too late for me after they bought tickets to say actually, we are going to go full price. Actually, I warmed up now. so we need to double the price.

Okay. Maybe we should have a bucket at the end to respect the heat. Just a little respect the heat bucket. This show is 93% there. You can't pay 50% of the cost, guys. I think a little respect the heat bucket where they go, do you know what? He was hot. He was warmed. He was hot. So I did Hartford. But that's good, though. You'll be like, you know, you don't want to go in undercooked. And I've got the summer off, so it's good.

You want to not be worrying about it over the summer. Yeah, because I'm, I'm, I'd say that if you're warmed for the tour, I'm, I've, I've been boiling for four months of heat. Are you like a pan that's been left on the cook and someone's forgotten about it? I'm at the stage where I know the show so well and I know how it works and it's gone really well that I'm so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so,

so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, Are you like a pan that's been left on the cook and someone's forgotten about it? I'm at the stage where I know the show so well and I know how it works and it's gone really well, that I'm so at points, feel nothing as you go out. There's no, and then like there are zero nerves, which is mental because that's not a human place to be in. And then you want to try and scare yourself before you go out. So I try and distract myself right up until the moment. And then when I walk out, I try and shock a bit, I need to be a bit like, bloody hell, I'm doing a show because it's sort of, you need that energy of being scared. And then I've started putting new bits in the show because it keeps it going and exciting and

stuff. So that's why I like, and the crowd was. Last night I had to kind of kid myself because I'd done the parents evening and that had gone well. Parents afternoon? Parents afternoon. Did your dad get any good jokes in? Was it competitive between you two? Did he smack you off? No, he was funny because he got caught in, I don't know how much I can give away but I don't think it's a problem is it? Like he basically kept getting caught. Makes people want to watch it.

Got caught in a bidding war with Larry Lam. He basically ended up in a dick swinging contest with Larry Lamb, which is quite fun to watch. Amazing. I bet Larry Lamb's got a massive dick. I bet he has. Yeah, yeah. But no, it was really fun. And then the evening record. Ours was the Christmas one, Rob. Oh, did you work with the witch jumper? I love it when you do a Christmas one. No. Thank God.

But there was, you know, there was a Christmas tree there. Oh yeah, stick a Christmas tree up the tree up the old TV center tree. I love doing a Christmas special because you do go, oh, I feel like randomly, this is this one's a bit more important. It's a bit, do you know what I mean? You feel like more is more likely to get more viewers? Yeah, Christmas. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, people are almost the Christmas one. And you know what I always I've not that I've always wanted to be in one of those montages. You know, those montages of like the BBC's what they've got coming up at Christmas.

Oh yeah. So they just cut to you laughing while your dad pulls his trousers down walking towards Larry Lamb. Exactly. Oh, what a crazy evening at the parents' evening. Coming soon to Boxing Day on ITV. Yeah, exactly. But the evening was Alex Brooker and his mum. Oh yeah. Sophie Ellis-Bexter and Janet Ellis. Is her mum famous? Her mum, yeah, she used to be a Blue Peter presenter. Right, I didn't know that. Yep. And Janet Ellis's husband, who's since passed away, who's not Sophie Ellis-Bexter's dad, invented the last leg. What, the TV show idea? Yeah, he was the head of the sport company

that made all the Paralympic stuff in 2012. Oh, wow, okay. And then who was the last couple? Jeff and Bobby Brazier. Nice, look at that, lovely little clean sweep. Yeah, you should do it, Rob, but it is a level of, you don't realize a level of stress it's like yeah bringing your dad to work or something do you know what I mean and I think my dad might say something inappropriate

anyway um how the kids what you're just you just you're seeing a much you're doing the school runs I did the school run this morning my son's obsessed with his fireman bike lovely my daughter's she's there asleep when I get in bed in the evening. You see them asleep? I see them asleep. I see mine asleep a lot. It's weird, isn't it?

You don't think, because you go, the thing with the tour is you go, well, I won't be away that much because Britain's not that big. Do you know what I mean? So it's not, the amount of people that say, they imagine up when you're going on tour, it's like, okay, I'll see you in three months. And it's not like that.

But what it is like is I will see you after five hours sleep to drop you off to school and then that's it. Cause when we were around in the day, like I didn't get picked up to go to Wolverhampton until about two o'clock, but they're in school day. So three hours they're back, you're not there. So it is... You've seen more of Cat Daly and Ben Shepard. I have been. I've been all over the place. Last two weeks, I've barely seen them and I'm feeling really guilty because they've just been away so much. And I keep missing assemblies and stuff.

Like last week, I did Guildford three nights in Cambridge. Then I went to Milton Keynes and did two shows. And then this week's Wolverhampton, Northampton, Albury, Stoke, two in Canterbury. But they'd be places you want to visit anyway, wouldn't they? Yeah. I mean, so a lot of the time, actually, what was weird when they put the date through, me and Lou were already going to Wolverhampton and Stoke that week. So I thought we might as well do a gig there while we're visiting. Exactly.

Do you know what I mean? Yeah. So, um, but I, I've been doing the school runs with them though, but I was late the other morning, Josh. First time I've been late ever. There was like loads of, they both had cuts, they had like plasters on and then they were arguing over plasters. And then I got in the car and then the day before in the car I'd moved something and

Lou had left this like chemical thing that basically gets the smell out of a car, but you put it on the carpet and then hoover it off. But it's in this little like cardboard box and it just exploded everywhere and I thought I was going to get choked out to death. And then I said to Lou when I was doing bedtime and cleaning out the hamster, do you mind moving the car and then cleaning that up? And she was, yeah, I'll do that. But then she didn't clean it up. So I got in the car and then there was all this chemical and they were like, what's all

this chemical stuff? So we had to get out of that car, get in the other car. Then we were late and then my daughter only had crocs on because her foot hurt and didn't want to wear shoes and trainers, sometimes didn't want to have an argument. So we get there and then we were the first time in five years they've ever been late, which is, well, you know, we were, and it was me.

Lou's still not been late with them. It's such a massive window. And what happens when they're late? They have to go through the reception sign in and then they have to like go into the assembly without their class and everyone looks at them and there was one of them was getting stressed. One of them wasn't. Yeah. The first time ever. It's not bad. No, that's pretty solid. Cause we were late the other morning.

The fucking roadwork. I don't want to beat this guy, but the fucking roadworks in Hackney is off the fucking charts it's insane what's happening there? Oh you tell me mate because you get to the bit where there was roadworks and it's gone and you're like fucking brilliant at last after week and then you go 40 yards up the road and it's just closed further up and they're just fixing the roads. I get it. Slowly. Just so I think we might just have to get to a point where we once a year as a nation, yeah, say you can't drive for a week and we'll fix all of the roads. We all come together as

one. We just, we say this is like, you know, like the purge, the film, the purge. So for a week, you're not allowed to leave your house. Because we're fixing all the roads. You get arrested if you're found driving. If you can pedestrian, that's fine. And every, a bit like national service. Yeah. Yeah. Every man of a certain age is called up as a road worker. And you do labor and stuff where you move stuff, shift stuff. And then we've done our roadworks for the year. I think it's something to do with the water. I think all the

water pipes, I don't know, this is in Thames water, I think, in London, all the water pipes are constantly bursting because there's been no money put back into the pipes. So I think like every time they do it, it's that near me, it's every couple of weeks, they dig up the same bit of road and I don't know what's happening in there. And one it was like this is gonna be shut for 12 weeks. I was like you on crack. That's my school run route, mate. I've got to like fucking like get a drone, just get a drone to carry

the kids in. It's mad. God, they're boring bastards. Can I just say when I said every man of a certain age, I mean that because of all women, but I meant that because of that's the way now, like the army works in war. I don't know if that's still the case. Men and women should be doing the roads, not just men. Or women and no men.

Were you worried about, when I was growing up, I was terrified about- Of women. You don't need that in the past tense. When I was growing up, I was terrified of being called up for war when I was in my 20s. It was like it really was one of those things I think about a lot. You know, those like weird irrational fears when you're a kid. I think I might have thought about it. I didn't think much. It wasn't a constant. And I used to think yeah I don't know why that was such a what's it called? Recruiting? You wouldn't have been laying. Not with your flat feet and asthma. I think I'd have been putting like not Bletchley Park but one of those pen pushing jobs wouldn't I? Yeah you've got asthma

that you get out of it. It's so mild though, my asthma. Oh, you'd fucking whip it up though for the selection day. Yeah, yeah, good point. Hello? Hello? There are very few things that you can be certain of in life. But you can always be sure the sun will rise each morning. You can bet your bottom dollar that you'll always need air to breathe and water to drink. And of course, you can rest assured that with Public Mobile's 5G subscription phone plans, you'll pay the same thing every month. With all of the mysteries that life

has to offer, a few certainties can really go a long way. Subscribe today for the peace of mind you've been searching for. Public Mobile. Different is calling. Josh, how do you deal with guilt of missing the kids assemblies? Because I have missed because of the tour and busyness this year, I've missed my daughter's big play where she was in Aladdin. My other they've got another show coming up, which I'm missing, which is out there recorder and guitar performance. And then my other daughter's in a school production where she's playing a parrot and I'm missing

that and they are devastated and I'm struggling and I just it's in a school production where she's playing a parrot and I'm missing that, and they are devastated and I'm struggling. And I just, it's so hard. I just have to say, my performances of a higher level of more people need to see it than yours. So that has to take precedence. It's just, I was listening to this thing, you know, like work life balance and stuff. And like-

When you put the talk, you can't be the only I do find this kind of wild about schools that they'll go. Okay, this Tuesday in December is at 230pm. Yeah. Your children will be doing the thing that they think is the most important thing of the year. And yeah, it's 230 on a Tuesday. and you've got a couple of months notice. Oh, it's not even a couple of months, like six weeks. And sports day, why isn't sports day every single year? This is the day we're doing sports day. That should be in the diary, because again, I'm missing sports day again.

There's two years running out of sports day. Now I'm fucking pissed off. Someone's scared of the old dad's race. No, there isn't a dad's race. Oh, is that daddy? Yeah, can you put me in a gig on the day of the sports day? So that's annoying. So I'm missing sports day as well. And I was just thinking, you know, like that work-life balance. And I just don't, I was watching this like, it was like an apprentice candidate talking about it. And she was like, look, people come to me, can you have a flexible

working environment? Can you have work-life balance? No, you can't. If you want to be successful, if you want to succeed, you want to make anything of yourself, you can't have a work-life balance. That's bullshit. People, well, yes and no, but I do think it is true. Like, if I'm in a position now where I can be more flexible and I've got a bit more power and control over my diary than I did. But only so much. That's what I'm saying. Only so much. But when I first started, if I was starting comedy now, I would miss everything.

Well, that's why it's a huge advantage to start comedy in your 20s. Well, 100%. So if I was, I've got a lifestyle I've got now because I sacrificed everything just to work, right? And I lost, not didn't lose friendships, but I fell out of the loop with lots of friends and I didn't see much family

and it was just so single-minded. And I thought I became a success myself. If you want to see your family, there was just so single-minded and I feel like I became a success myself. If you want to see your family, there's a great TV show on ITV, Rob. Where everyone gets paid to do it. I just felt like I was just so single-focused on that. If I had the same focus as I did then, now, I would not see my children and my work could be a success, but my life would be a mess. And at the moment, I'm easing off on

work because I'm in a privileged position where I don't have to work as much as I did at the start. But it's still really difficult. But like, you know, it's easy, you do have to make a slight choice really of like, how much do I want my career to take off and how much do I want to be in my family and it is not always, you know, it can swing either way. It can. And I think it's, I think we're in an incredibly lucky position where it worked out.

Because if it hadn't worked out in the way it had for both of us, and we were still at the level we were at when we were 28. I'd find it very difficult. Because the thing with going on tour, so when I go on tour, I know for 18 months, I did one gig a week basically, yeah, to warm up the tour. That's not really eating into my life. And that gig was in Kennington every week basically. So

that's fine and then I know that the tour is about two or three blocks of three to four months. Yes. And that's done but if I was still, I mean this is very in comedy but just because it's the job we understand, if I was still at the level where I had to go to Cardiff every Cardiff, Birmingham, every weekend, every weekend, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, it would be fucking really, really difficult. Yeah. It's and I see this with a lot, a lot of people in TV, because TV is one of those jobs. I don't know if it's across all genres, but certainly in the genre we tend to work in, which is comedy entertainment, it's one of those jobs where your hours aren't

really respected. No, they work all bank holidays, Easter Sunday. Yeah, because you're on freelance contracts and there's a show day which is really long and you know, so you know, if you've got a high-gold news for you or something, you've got to edit through the night, all this kind of stuff, do you know what I mean? And all those things that are really exciting in your 20s. Because it's, oh my God, my job is my life and it's fun and I like the people.

Getting flown up to Glasgow to stay in Glasgow for the weekend where you've got to do 20 minutes of comedy every night and then hang out all day. Like this is fucking amazing. And it still is amazing in your 30s and 40s, but if you've got two kids at home and your partner's doing all the runs and the birthday parties and you're just sat in a hotel room in Glasgow, it's miserable. Yeah, it really, it can be. And it's difficult. I think the thing is you can do work-life balance to an extent, right? Which is that you go, I'm not gonna work all the time. I'm not gonna feel like if I don't do...

Well, something has to be sacrificed. If you want to have more time with the kids. If I don't do Parents' Evening with Ramesh, then my career is gonna hit the skids. Like that, do you know what I mean? I wanted to do that because I enjoyed it and it was fun and stuff. But like, you know, you weren't yourself. I certainly worked myself earlier into my career thinking if I don't take every

month of the week that I'm offered, my career is going to die. Do you know what I mean? Exactly. And now you find yourself in a position where you're like, um, you can say no to stuff and things keep going and it's fine. But when you have said yes to stuff a year in advance you can't then move it. No especially if it's a tour. So there is a it is physically impossible once that tours in because the amount of people that have got babysitters, got hotels, got you know built their lives around. And we're sort of the bosses of our own jobs really where other people if you are working for a company you can't always go I just need that day off you off. They'll be like, no, you can't. And then when a promotion comes around,

it will be like, well, they're the people, they sacrifice more for the company. Why don't we give them the job? You know what I mean? So it's like a constant trade-off. You can't have everything you want from your career and everything you want as a family person. It is something that's got to be compromised. You just have to balance up the monetary value and your aspiration value to time at home and family stuff. Do I want to go to work to get that money for that big extra holiday or I'll work a bit less and we don't have that holiday? It's balancing that kind of stuff. I also think, I know there's, I think the reason this podcast works is both of us are trying our best to put our family

first. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. And so like, you see people and they're just like the opposite side, end of the spectrum. Do you know what I mean? They're not thinking then even having these conversations, I think, is a very positive thing. Do you know what I mean?

Well, some people just solely just, you know, and fair enough, they love their career, all they want to do is their career and they've got kids, but they're just like, yeah, I think it's a very positive thing. Do you know what I mean? Well, some people just solely just, you know, and fair enough, they love their career, all they want to do is their career and they've got kids, but they're just like, yeah, I've got kids, but I'm a whatever I am and I want to be the best at it and I want to become CEO or become a, you know, whatever it is or do this thing. But everyone's different, but I'm just, I still always find that guilt of like, why am I doing that when I'm missing this and that's more important. But then I'm like, but this, you know, this money will, I'll be able to not tour for a couple of years because I've worked hard for this year. And then I'll be around, you know, I'm trying to explain to the kids, but I'll be

around a bit more next year. And I'm around in the day a bit more. And it's feast or famine where, you know, I take August off. Not many dads do that. But then, yeah, that's doing every school pick up and school drop. It is, you can get in your own head about it, but it is, I don't think you can have both really. You have something has to be sacrificed at some point. And it's what's really difficult to explain to a child is because you wouldn't, I don't mean as in I'm trying to get it through to their thick heads and they don't understand it. What I mean is what you would never say is actually over a year, my kids see far more of me than if I was working nine to five in

central London. Because do you know what I mean? And I was having to go to there's lots of people. But then you also I'm away from the family home for like 110 nights this year. But not in the house at bedtime. You're shagger Rob. Deal with it. Do you know what I mean? You love shagging. Can't bring all the puss puss back to the family home. Do you know what I mean? You love shagging. Can't bring all the puss puss back to the family home. Do you know what I mean? Man's got to eat out on the road.

You brought your daughters along a few times for your affairs, but it felt like it put you off your strides. Exactly. Stop killing my street cred. But it means that you're less stressed when you come home. If you're getting to have 110 nights shagging. I've stayed at this hotel in Birmingham 10 nights this year. That is too long for any man Yeah, that is Honestly my knowledge of hotel breakfast across the case

I didn't say this about my day the other day. Come on. So on the first day I was in Hartford on Tuesday. Yeah. So I had to go into town for a doctor's appointment. You're doing a two night run on a warm up tour. You are warm, aren't you? He's fucking mental. Just going to do a week of the palladium, get ready for the tour. I don't know. They were just like, oh, Hartford want to do two nights. You're like, well, it's one of the closer ones, so why not?

Yeah. It's fucking beautiful theatre by the way fair play to Hartford they've just I don't know where they've got the money they've just spent 39 million pounds on a new theatre. I don't think I've been to this theatre. yeah it's lovely if you want to do two nights. I'm alright for the moment. Add it to the door up. Oh the beam is it the beam yeah is the beam yeah beam that gone purple looks like fucking Cadbury's advert the seats yeah they love it I didn't see the seats bright purple boy not to brag but I didn't see the bloody color six I saw loads of seats in Wolverhampton bills sold out I don't

know what I think a lot of these people forget I've got a gig. Yeah, get the wrong year. So I get there, I'm fucking knackered. I get there at like half four because I had a podcast in London and they give me a car. So I've got like three other... That's the thing with podcasts now as well, right? Podcasts are becoming a little bit too much like TV for my liking, where they go, do you want to do my podcast? You go, yeah, all right. Go, there'll be a car to pick you up. What? Yeah. You're doing a shit TV show. Yeah. That's what's happening now. And it's not. But then it's like, well, that's not a podcast, is it? I've got to get dressed and leave my house. I don't want to leave my house. That's my new Rawm podcast. So I get there at half four and I'm like, I'm gonna have a sleep. I really need to sleep because I feel fucking awful. I don't have to sit for three hours. Yeah. There's

no sofa. I do find this mental at theaters. There's no sofa at the back. There's no sofa. Just a normal like a dining room. They just give you a dining room chair. Do you remember how hot it was on Tuesday? Yeah, about 25 degrees. I to sleep in the back of my car. You slept in the back of the car? Was Ali there protecting you? No, Ali was like, I was like Ali, it was part around the back, I was like, I'm just going to have to sleep in the back seat to the car with my duvet and my pillow.

And I was like, you can't turn the aircon on, can you? He's like, no, because then you've got to have the engine on. So it was like a fucking dog left in a car. Did you have the window open? No, I didn't actually. That's mental. That is actually dangerous. What is the worst way to die? I'm dripping with sweat. That is the worst possible way for a comedian to die. Imagine that. Josh has died. How? He didn't have any ventilation when he slept in the back of

the car at Hartford after doing a podcast pilot and parents evening. What way to go out? Well, I died the day before parents evening. So my dad would have had to go on on his own. Just with your mom and confused everyone. Anyway, so that was a bleak. So now this is something that sums up my life. Go and do school pickup. I've got all these tasks to do. Can up my life go and do school pickup. Yeah, I've got all these tasks to do Cancel the storage go to school pickup. Yeah, I've got to give the cat our antibiotics Rob So barrels all right now, but we've got you know when you got to finish the course of antibiotics

How old's barrel Josh? We got her when I was in Australia, which was 2015. So she's 10. So 10? Oh so not that old for a cat though. No but because she's had, because she's got a kidney thing. Oh she has a kidney flushed every month. Yeah yeah yeah.

So the reason she got ill is that got infected. Oh fuck. Right. So we've got to finish the antibiotics because that if it was a normal thing, but because it's the kidney, by the fucking antibiotics. So this is a problem. Rose has been doing it because Rose gets on better with barrel than I do. She's the default parent. She's more into cats than you and she no I like that. Yeah, but Rose loves

barrel. Yeah, she's really my son loves Beryl too much. Okay. Like, he's too much. He's obsessed with cats. Right. But he's not he's too rough with her. Okay. We have to say look, if you want a new kit and you've got to ease off on Beryl. Okay. Think about the new kitten. So we say that a lot. Yeah. Um, anyway, I've got to force it down her throat Rob. Oh, what about barrel? This is good. I've had that before. It's sort of like a little, um, it's like a cow pole squeezy. No, it's a pill. Oh, a pill? Jesus Christ. I know. So how can you put it in her food? I've

watched Rose do it. Yes, she won't eat it in her food. I've watched Rose do it. She holds barrel and then she prizes her mouth open, drops it into her mouth, closes her mouth and then has to stroke a chin down her throat and get her to swallow. I've got to do that twice today. Oh my God. So you haven't done it yet at all? Rose was here this morning so Rose did it before she went. Right. I'm fucking dreading it.

You don't need that. I don't need that. So after this I've got to cancel the storage, force feed barrel, like she's kind of a prisoner on hunger strike. I've got to tidy up. I've got to go and get the dinner stuff and snacks for the kids and I've got to do the school run, pick up the kids. And then Rose's mum is getting here because I've then got to drive to Blackheath to do

another fucking warm up. Are you getting picked up or are you driving? I can't get picked up because I'm too tight timelined so Ali's got to go and set up. Right you're gonna meet him there. I'm gonna get an Uber. Don't drive. It's only 20 minutes. It's only 20 minutes so I'm gonna get an Uber there. New Silver Town link mate you'll be there before you know it. Yeah. Oh that's a busy day mate. Oh fucking hell. I've got nothing tonight. Oh, the Dermgate. There been a problem though. It's a 730 start, but it was advertised at eight PM in other places. So we're gonna have to push it back to eight PM.

Have I ever told you about this story? This is a quite good story about the wrong time on a start. So this would have been 2013, right? Adam Hills is performing his, is recording his special, his DVD at the time, at Hammersmith Apollo. So in the afternoon, I go to Arsenal. The man that ran our agency then, Addison Creswell, who's since passed away, only a few months after this. He used to go to Arsenal, he used to have extra seats, and occasionally he'd take me and Alex Brooker, because Alex Brooker's an Arsenal fan. So I went to that, and then while I'm watching it, I get a text from Flo, who's my agent, saying there's been a misprint on the tickets, and half of say 7.30 and half of them say 8 o'clock.

Yeah. Would you be okay to come and fill, do 20 minutes at the top? Oh for anyone that got there a bit early so they're not getting impatient? For anyone that got there a bit early, yeah. Okay, not bad little gig. Yeah and I'm like yeah fine. I'm a legend, I'll slide in there. Alright I'll do that. Yeah, and I'm like, yeah, fine. I'm a legend, I'll slide in there. Alright, I'll do that. Yeah, Addison doesn't know. Do you want there to be something amazing about that?

And I feel like I'm in that at the moment and you are as well. Where when you're a comedian, you call yourself a comedian, but if you aren't in the middle of doing gigs, you're not really a comedian. You have done comedy before. But I'm at a point now where someone could go, Rob, could walk in this room now and go, come through here, there's a gig on, can you do 20 minutes? And I'd be like, fine. You asked me that a year ago, I could go, Rob, can you like, could walk in this room now and go come through here there's a gig on, can you do 20 minutes?

Yeah, yeah, fine. You asked me that a year ago, I'd go, absolutely not kill me now. I'm jumping out this window. But I was at the point where I could just do 20, it was fine. And then we go back to watching the match and Addison doesn't know at this stage. He's in charge, he's Hillsies agent, like he's in charge of the company Hillsies with as well. I'm not, I'm not going to fucking tell him.

I'm not passing on this information. Let me just say I'm going to go early from the football, yeah. No, no, then the football carries on. I don't have to go early. And then he's like, oh, I've just bought a house around it. Do you want to come and have a look at my new house? I'm terrified of him because he runs the whole agency. Yes, you've got to say yes.

So I said, yes. And then I'm doing this tour of his house. He's bragging about how David Gray lives next door. Right? Wow, that really that really timestamps it. Yeah. I'm going to be honest. David Gray's made a lot more money than you think.

That was one big house. Yeah. And then I'm like, I can't, it gets to about five 30. I'm still walking around this house and talking about David gray. He's Alex Brooker with you as well. No, I'm just me and him. All right. Good. Cause he would have slowed the tour up as well. You don't need that.

Love Alex to, you know, if you're on time, if you're on a walking tour, you have Alex Brooker and you've got a gig to get to. There was too many holes in the floor at this point in the building side to take Brooker on. Anyway, it gets to about 5.30, you know, he doesn't know. I haven't, I'm not passing on the information. Anyway, we finish and then he's like, do you want to, I'm going to go home. I was like, I'll see you later then. I walk around the corner after order an Uber. Yeah, get to Hammersmith Apollo

Addison stood there. He stood there. He's just gone straight there as well. He's beating me there So awkward Why don't you just say I'm doing some support for Adam Hills? Because I because the the ticket thing is total fuck up Yeah, I know But if you say oh I'm gonna get there at you say, Oh, I'm going to get there at seven. Cause I like to have an hour to get ready where you need half an hour. No, no, no. But he thinks Adam's going straight on.

If he thought there was support, he'd be like, why are you doing support? The show's done. And you're going to get your agent in trouble. Oh, horrible. It's like indecent proposal. Yeah. So then I get there and then I go on and then I go on to a room that's a third full. Right. And I have to do a set to people walking in and taking their seats. Yeah. Cameras on. Oh, just crowd work, bit of crowd work.

Bit of crowd work. As they're coming in and explaining the situation. Absolutely. Yeah. But you can't for 20 minutes keep going. Just so you know, yeah, I know, yeah, I'm the other one from the last leg. No, no, I'm not meant to be doing the support. No, and I'm not disabled actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

No, so what's happened is half, I don't know what time your ticket says, but oh my God, what a day that was. How was Adam doing with that? Was he stressing? No, he was fine. Pretty chilled out in his own. Because I suppose for you, you're like,

if you're him, you're like, well, we'll just start. I'll just go on at eight, it's not the end of the world. Yeah, exactly, that's what I'm doing at Northampton, which is not, I'd ideally start at half seven, get home earlier, because I'm gonna do school runs tomorrow to Moz. And then I'm at home for a bit, and then I go back up to Aylesbury. And then after Aylesbury, I've got Stoke the next day.

So we're driving for an hour to stay at a hotel on an industrial estate in Coventry. Why do you do it yourself, Rob? So I'll spend the day there. Why didn't you book a nice country hotel in the Warwickshire countryside? Well, no, because there weren't much, to be honest with you. Do you prefer a city hotel or a country hotel? I prefer a city hotel that is, I can be absolutely anonymous.

Sometimes you go to the country hotels, it becomes a bit of a thing that you're there and it gets a bit difficult where I like being completely anonymous and just get on with it and shuffle out in and out my room. But because when I was supporting Stephen Merchant, we were in one country hotel and at breakfast they asked us we wanted to come come outside to view a falconry demonstration. Yes, that's the kind of shit that happens where at the the Coventry industrial estate opposite the cinema. There's nothing. There's prostitution and company conferences and Bobby B. And to be honest, all three sometimes cross.

I want to learn, earn and get my dick sucked. If Bobby doesn't pick up at the company conference, he's giving a call to a lady of the night. Anyway, so yeah, we there do Stoke then drive back from Stoke the same night. And then I've got a Lilo and Stitch screening. So what time are you going to get back from Stoke? Probably about midnight, one, about 1am, 1am. What time do your wheels start moving? Like what time? Sorry that's such a mad phrase. He's mental at it.

What do you want from me? Yep, good question. So what we do is I walk off stage and everything's in the car. If you've got a long journey. Yeah, everything's in the car, yeah I do that. And the tour manager's in there and I literally walk off stage getting the car. He's already in the car? Yep, he's already in the car waiting. I walk off stage, go out the off stage, get in the car. Yeah, he's already in the car waiting. I walk off stage, go out the stage door, get in the car, we drive off. If I need to get back, if I'm staying over, I'll wait for 20 minutes,

get changed and then I'll go out and say hello to everyone. But like, for example, so I've got to get back. Because if you wait, it can add another hour to your journey. Then I'm getting home at two or three in the morning. So I'm going to get to London, Central London Hotel, because the next day I'm hosting a screening of the Lilo and Stitch film. What the fuck?

At 10 a.m. Who are you? Lou and the girls are coming. So I thought actually that'd be quite nice to see them there. So we're doing that. Then I'm gonna drop them home. Then I go to Canterbury for Sunday night. Then I've got Canterbury Monday night.

And then I'm in Goodwood doing you bet for two days. And I, I just, I don't know when I'm going to flip, but I will under you bet in Bournemouth. They've took it on the road. They've unleashed Mulhern round the mouth. Oh, I, I don't know what, what they told me. Oh, right. They're doing you bet on the road. I've thought that's the last thing I fucking need. Get me in a studio made stuff. So right. They're doing you bet on the road. I thought that's the last thing I fucking need. Get me in a studio made stuff. So sorry. Are we doing you bet? Why don't we do you bet on the

road? Yeah. Just to be clear, I don't know about you. I think my role is the guesting. I don't think I'm trying to be being cancer. By the way, and when I did the other shows, they were brilliant fun, but they did him in a studio. Now, I think they're doing them on the road where we're at Goodwood Racecourse. I think there's going to be car stuff and I think there'll be other stuff. So is it outside?

Yeah. But they, yeah, so it's outside. But like, what's weird is I'm doing it next Tuesday and the forecast is like 25 degrees again. And they're like, yeah, so if you can look like, you know, smart with a jacket on for Saturday night TV, I went, I'm going to be sweaty like an absolute fucking nutcase. I stood on the racetrack with a suit jacket on. I looked mad. I'm just going to go and stand. I've been in gym clothes all week. Dripping with sweat while a man attempts to throw 30 different dobs of frisbee in a minute. I love sweat dripping off me nose with one of them Madonna mics on around my mouth. Go, do you think he's going to do it good work? I'm gonna be a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a

little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a

little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a little bit of a It'll be fun though. I'm looking forward to it. Do you know who the other celebs are? Yes. So I don't know who I'm with, but that does, when you're filming for two days, it doesn't really matter. Oh, I've got it in for two days. I presumed I was traveling down and doing it the next day. That's two full days. So nine to six, two full days. What? Yeah, nine to six.

Fuck it out. And then yes, and they do like two big challenges each day. So it's spread over two days. Right. So there's going to be a lot of sitting around with the other two. The other two celebs are crucial. Exactly. So, but when I spoke to them about it, they were like, look, when they did it in a studio,

it took so long to do because they want these big massive things. So it's exciting. But trying to get them in the studio is too much hassle. And everyone was getting hot on board. Where actually if you do it across a day, you can keep the energy up because you're doing it in fits and spurts. Is there no audience then? I think there's going to be like an audience that moves around with it. You know, a bit like a golf course.

You know, there's like, they go to the different parts of the track to watch. Well, that's just going to be great. I'll be honest, when I saw it for two days in my diary, I thought, well, I'll probably be traveling down on the... Well, I didn't for three days at the start. I was like, listen, it can't be three days. That's better. But it's two days. But I think it's a better decision. I can't wait. I can't wait. Also, it's just... It's my favorite show as a kid. You know what the most exciting thing is? Yeah, because I loved it. It's like when you arrive and you find... Because when you do these shows, the other celebs you're with, you are with them all day, every day, like the whole time on these shoots, a bit like when you do Bake Off, the celebs special.

So when you arrive, it's so stressful because you walk through a door and immediately you go, this is going to either be amazing or horrific. Rob, I've just picked up my phone to text and ask who my you bet. But there's that thing of, do I want to know now? Well, I was told I was told and it may they said they think it's so ball and someone else. So if it's Zoe Ball, it's going to be amazing. I am. I love that. She's so lovely and giving and fun and chilled out. Yeah. Whereas there's other people

where you think this is hell. Yes, there's two types of people in entertainment, Josh. There's ones that can see what it is. And it's just a load of nonsense, but it's fun. We're very lucky to do it. It doesn't really matter. It's just a bit of telly and they're the fun ones. And there's ones that think what they're doing is so important and they are draining and they take themselves seriously. And normally it comes from a place of their own insecurity. So no, it's not their fault, but their presence can be a real drain on the life force around you. Fingers crossed you won't be on me, Tom Allen.

Oh, I'll tell you what, Zoe Ball and Tom Allen booked me in for a week. I could do a week of that. Monday to Friday, nine to five. Can you travel home from Goodwood? That's quite close. Or that's a bit. I'll travel back from Goodwood. It's not too far for me. Unless

there's a really nice hotel. Well, normally I just stay in a hotel, but I'm away so much at the moment that I am. I'll probably come back. What is it? Oh, it's an hour and a half. Yeah, no, I drive back. It's down in Chichester, isn't it? Oh, God. Oh, God. Well, we'll look forward to hearing how it went. But I've got some time off, guys. I know I've not spoken about my kids much because I've been away working, but I've got

a couple of weeks off. I think we've brought in the kid guilt, that's enough. Huge kid guilt at the moment. But anyway, it's like, you have to do some of it, you can't all be one way. But I've got like about two week, two weeks off after two weeks off. So I'm at home over half term with the kids. So I'll be able to see them and I have loads of parenting stuff. Should we do a small business shout out?

Yeah. Hi, I'd love to give a small business shout out to an amazing business. Cook with Casper. Cook with Casper is a social cooking club for parents and babies in Walthamstow and Islington in London. Rebecca runs classes for parents and babies aged six to 18 months, enabling you to get the fridge stock for the coming week with delicious food

whilst providing a social experience for both you and your little one. She also runs supper clubs, stay and play classes for preschoolers who cook for themselves and then eat a meal together to develop confidence in the kitchen and a chance to explore different food. The classes were my favorite class during maternity leave and Rebecca creates a wonderful space for parents to feel confident with food for their little ones and for kids to develop a great relationship

with food. That's cook with Casper K for the Casper so K A S P E R cook with Casper K A S P E R so go to Instagram at cook with Casper and you can find the classes on hapity and hapity what's hapity thanks so much Emma I don't know what hapity is maybe that's an app I would be so grateful for a small business shout out on your show. Here is a little info on my business. Carla's Cookie Jar with a K. Carla's with a K. A little K's here. Cookie with a K. Hopefully not one more.

That'd be too many K's. Jar specializes in creating unique hand decorated sugar cookies that are perfect for any celebration from birthdays to anniversaries to corporate events. These cookies are not only delicious, but they're also beautifully designed to match the theme of your event. In addition to our hand decorated sugar cookies, we also offer a range of gourmet NY cookies with mouth watering flavors like apple crumble,

sticky toffee pudding, and cherry Bakewell. These cookies are perfect if you're looking for a more indulgent treat. You can find me on Facebook, Instagram, and at Carla's karlas Cookie with a k jar WWW.carla's cookie jar calm. Thank you so much for creating such a brilliant podcast

I listen to you guys while decorating cookies working by yourself can be quite lonely So having you guys chatting away keeps me company and giggling away. Kind regards, Carla. There we go. Oh, oh, Hapaty is an app. I'm so tired. I'm struggling. Hapaty is a website where you can find baby and toddler classes near you. So you put in an area, their age and then a day. So if you're working and you've only got one or two days off, you can pop it in and it comes up with loads of offers.

Yeah, so I've just been like Bromley on a Monday, nought to six months and I've got some baby massage and baby gymnastics, monkey music, and Sanbeze sports school, beanstalk arts. This is great. There we go. It's really good that you can there's a happy tea as well. That's what seems like a good website. Great. Rob, I'll see you next time when hopefully we'll be less tired.

And we might have seen our children awake. We might have seen our children awake. Not just pop our heads in the sleep. Yeah, just not just watch them asleep. And then argue with them before school. Oh, God. Oh, God. Right, I'm going to go and force feed a cat.

Be patient with that pussy. See you next week.