Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S11 EP33: Andy Goldstein

Episode Date: December 5, 2025

Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the brilliant presenter and radio broadcaster - Andy Goldstein. Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available eve...rywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: Hello@lockdownparenting.co.uk Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: hello@keepitlightmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Canada's Wonderland is bringing the holiday magic this season with Winterfest on select nights now through January 3rd. Step into a winter wonderland filled with millions of dazzling lights, festive shows, rides, and holiday treats. Plus, Coca-Cola is back with Canada's kindest community, celebrating acts of kindness nationwide with a chance at 100,000 donation for the winning community and a 2026 holiday caravan stop. Learn more at canadaswunderland.com.
Starting point is 00:00:30 Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Widdickham. Welcome to Parent in Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves, and hopefully you, feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week you'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping.
Starting point is 00:00:51 Or hopefully how they're not coping. And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener, with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, There are plenty of times where none of us know what we're doing. Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with... Neve. Can you say Rob Beckett?
Starting point is 00:01:12 Bob Beckett. And can you say Josh Whittaker? Josh Wittaker. And can you say, I'll tell you that for free? I'll tell you that, I'll free. There we go. Catchphrase. Great work.
Starting point is 00:01:27 Neve, N-I-A-M-H. N-I-A-M-H, yes. Thank you. Here is my very lively, two-and-a-half-year-old, Neve doing your names. We live in Tetbury in Gloucestershire, although I'm originally from North London. My brother, Uncle David, loves the pod too,
Starting point is 00:01:42 and has been trying to get Neve to do your names for a while. Since she could talk, I actually think she thinks you guys are Uncle David's mates. My husband, Tom Jones and I absolutely lovelessly. No, no. Not that near to Wales. Is it actually Tom Jones? I don't think it is Tom Jones.
Starting point is 00:01:58 He hasn't got a Yanke. here, does he? Probably. And I currently in the, not the bloody nose, right, etc. I currently in the trenches with a 16 week old Sadie who does not like to sleep. So lots of late night, listening
Starting point is 00:02:11 to you guys is getting me through the hourly wake-ups. Thanks, that's fantastic podcast. God. Fuck that. That's so hard, did it? Youngest is a lot better sleeping through the night since you come back from Japan and Australia, which is good.
Starting point is 00:02:26 She still comes in the night, but she's going a bed right now where before we had to sit with her and it was hard, man. It took hours. But that baby thing every hour. Ooh. How are you, Josh? Good way, you and busy.
Starting point is 00:02:39 Giggling, gigging, gigging. Yeah, good. We've got Andy Goldstein on today, Rob. Football, football, ladsads, love a bit of Andy Goldstein. We are going to obviously ask, we haven't interviewed him yet. So we're going to ask him about he got the first interview
Starting point is 00:02:51 with Noel Gallagher after Oasis were on tour, didn't he? Possibly the only one. I don't know if Noel Gallagher has done any other interviews. He loves talk sport, Noel Gallagher. does he rings up and chats him about man city so they've been doing that for years anyway and got goldstein's like a bit of a networker he's like really good friends with Robbie Williams
Starting point is 00:03:09 he's very front foot forward and pally with people but he's a good bloke and he's very funny he's good at talk sport as you know I'm a big talk sport you're a huge ambassador for talk sport I do you what's your favourite show on talk sport I love the Jamie O'Haw and Jason Kundy one when Tottenham and lose.
Starting point is 00:03:30 Right. That's quite fun. It depends what's happened in the football. I do like Ali McCoyst at all times and Alan Brazil and Ray Parlor. They're just top level. That's, lads. Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:03:40 And Annie Goldson and Darren Bent are good like that. And then Hawksby and Jacobs good. Charlie Baker's on that. He's brilliant. Yeah, he's great. I think you've done a bit of talks for. If your team was higher up the league and they spoke about them,
Starting point is 00:03:50 I think you'd get involved. No, I don't know if I would, Rob. I don't know if I would. They were just hammering Exeter City. Wouldn't you love that? The big old Devon Derby. Well, I quite like Exeter City. You shouldn't say that as a Plymouth fan, though.
Starting point is 00:04:00 Peace and love. This is why the Plymouth fans don't love you as much as they should. You've got a hate exit out. That's why they love Pyeface and not you. You've been in Coventry. Yes, I was in Coventry, yeah, absolutely. Three nights there. Quite a long time to be in Coventry.
Starting point is 00:04:16 Send me a video of your hotel room that bleaked me out. I'd say, Coventry, lovely people, great football team. I want to watch the football. Great stadium. great vibe, not loads of hotel options. I would say that I wouldn't go, it's not a hotbed. It's not a tourist destination, is it? Because I said to the people, the hotel I was in,
Starting point is 00:04:41 and people from Coventry were going, why'd you say in there? I was like, oh, you know, it just came out. I went, well, where else should I stayed? And they went, um, I thought, well, if you've taken this long, I think this may have been the best one to stay at. Student halls are obviously very near the Warwick Arts Centre, Rob.
Starting point is 00:04:59 Absolutely. I think it'd be mad to stay in the student halls of residence as a touring comedian. Don't you? I'd say, suspicious almost. This came up the other day, right? Yeah. So I was going on tour on Thursday, and it was my daughter's hockey match at the school. So I thought, I'll pop in for the first little bit, and then I've got to go and get the train.
Starting point is 00:05:21 Yeah. Right? as I'm leaving through the school gates a car comes in with a parent from a different from the from the school we're playing against right and he goes oh hello and I'm like hi yeah and he goes you're on tour here and I was like no my daughter's at this school and he said oh right yeah I didn't know that obviously yeah I did think sorry he didn't even know you was here first in my week I'm on tour and And what I'm doing on my tour is leaving a school at 2pm with a pillow and a suitcase. What element of this tour do you think I'm currently doing, leaving the school? Am I arriving or leaving? Have I arrived at the school? Are I staying at the school?
Starting point is 00:06:12 Have I just done a gig at the school? Because I do think if we heard of another comedian that sleeps at student halls of residence, it's a huge red flag. getting you, put him on the one that hangs around schools with a pillow of a Thursday afternoon. I think that's fine if you're leaving the school that your child's at. Yeah, but he seemed shocked
Starting point is 00:06:32 that my child was at the school. Well, it must be weird because I think, you know, obviously everyone at the school is just used to that Josh Whitacom's kid goes to school, but you feel another parent from another school arriving at there's Josh Whitakum of a pillow at a hockey match. Yeah. Not a fan, what you should have said,
Starting point is 00:06:47 not a fan of hockey, getting your head down. Well, I told you, I tell you what. did happen, Rob, is I walked to the hockey match with Rose, and then I would have my suitcase. The other morning, understandably, because my daughter is eight. Yeah. Any difference is embarrassing, understandably. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:06 The other morning I dropped her off. I already had my suitcase. She found that mortifying. That you had your suitcase with you dropping off. Yeah. Mortifying because she's going to miss you or just other people are going, why did that got less you? But other people are saying why she's had got a suitcase.
Starting point is 00:07:19 Well, they weren't even saying. saying that yet, but you know when you're at school, you're like, I don't want my parents to drop me off with any, when my parents would get, like, we used to have old banger cars because we couldn't afford, like, a reno espat, like other parents. I don't remember when we'd get a new old banger, I would be mortified. Do you know what I mean? Any difference? True.
Starting point is 00:07:40 Well, when we drop, we do a thing where you drop the kid off and they jump out the car, but my... You don't even stop, do you? You're doing it at 30 hours an hour. But they turn the music down, whatever. Because we'll be singing and let her elaborate. They go, no, turn it down, tell it. Like they don't want, you know.
Starting point is 00:07:54 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Any extra attention. So actually, when I got to the school and it was tight, I was only going to get up to watch the first 10 minutes to the hockey. I thought, I'm going to leave because I think me turning up for 10 minutes with a pillow and a suitcase actually is more damaging than being there than me not being there. So did you see that you were there? No.
Starting point is 00:08:13 So why did you go to the school? When I got to the school, I realized how far down the hockey was. I was like, by the time I've got that, I'm going to be turning around. within 10 minutes. Right, to go back to get your car. Yeah, I'm just coming. Yeah. Tap out.
Starting point is 00:08:27 Yeah, so there we go. So how's Rose getting on with you being away so much? Because you've been away quite a bit with a tour and last leg, haven't you? It's quite a busy period. It's much easier than it was in London because there's no long school run. Oh, yeah, because you had to drive or she had to get a cat. Is she driving yet? She's driving?
Starting point is 00:08:43 So have we discussed this? We've mentioned her driving before, but not since Exeter. She was trying to get a test. Well, I'll tell you on Tuesday. But basically, she, shall I do a trailer for that? She booked... How long is this going to be?
Starting point is 00:09:00 Because I don't feel like it's an hour long. I'll just quickly ready for it. She booked a test here. She went to a driving instructor here. It turned out that her driving instructor in London was absolute dog shit. Oh, really? And doing things that you shouldn't legally be allowed to do. Like getting her to drive the last.
Starting point is 00:09:20 person back home and then the last person so she'd turn up to your house with someone driving the car they'd get in the back then Rose would drive them home yeah fuck off but she didn't know that was that's mental that's not okay no so she was an Uber driver before she passed the test yeah exactly oh so she likes this new instructor because I had that is so important I had a bad driving instructor when I first started and a change it's someone else and it was life change I used to dread all of her lessons. Morale was so low and also you don't want someone
Starting point is 00:09:58 in the back watching you know? No exactly so there we go so um oh good luck to her so she's learning to enjoy it again cool well I'm glad we didn't tease that 80 second story I could have strung it out no no I was talking about the story oh god he's got incredible just heard that and thought I was accusing her of stringing it out
Starting point is 00:10:19 No, he was going to string out the story. No, he said that the story, oh, it doesn't matter. Bring it in, what's the problem? No, let's bring on Andy Goldstein. Andy, welcome to the show. Thank you. How many kids you got? Let's start with the basis.
Starting point is 00:10:38 I'd say Rob is so excited by this because this is Rob's fanboy moment. Robb, today, feels like I would if we booked Paul McCartney. absolutely i'm really i've really been sucked in by the new talk sport relaunch you you've got me from breakfast till dinner they've gone mad on the youtube the clips are good they know that they they book people that like aren't just winding you up to wind you up and the fun how is silent jordan well he yeah he's the anomaly he's stuck in the middle no it's mad you say that because because that the transformation of what radio is like now compared to what was like five 10 years ago i went out for lunch with a friend of mine to long ago.
Starting point is 00:11:19 And they said to me, I was chatting to my 12 year old and I said I'm meeting Andy Gosing today. And he was like, oh, talk sport. And they were like, you don't listen to Talk Sport. And he was like, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:11:28 But I see it on Instagram. Yeah. And it's just a whole new audience now with social media. Rob, for our mums that are listening, could you explain Talk Sport? So Talk Sport originally was aimed at angry taxi drivers.
Starting point is 00:11:42 It used to just be called Talk Radio back in the day, didn't it, before the sport was added to it? Well, there was two. Anyway, so it was more like the LBC model where they'd go, I think that taxi drivers overcharge and it's not really a skill learning the knowledge just so that people would ring up, argue, and fill the airwaves. But you come up with a fake view that you've got, Rob, not just one of your views.
Starting point is 00:12:04 Come up with like an example one. Uber's quite a good service. And then basically that went into football where you'd just do a mental opinion about Arsenal so that mental Arsenal fans would ring up and argue. And there's still a little bit of that, but it's more sort of knowing. And I think now that, you know, the hosts wind each other up. And now it's got a bit more calmer with it. And just that if you get really funny interest in people on it, you don't have to annoy.
Starting point is 00:12:30 Here's the question, right? What are, how often are you stood at the urinal with Simon Jordan at Talk Sport Towers and you're discussing parenting? How often does the sports mask slip and you're all showing? your softer parenting side. Our paths never cross because he leaves the office before I get there.
Starting point is 00:12:53 And he always does sit down ways. But they're on the urinal, which is on the urinal. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because he's a visa as well. You can seal the fake town on the urinal from very sad, big ass print, big orange ass print. I don't seem to have those conversations,
Starting point is 00:13:08 but I have conversations with people about parenting at work. How many kids you got, Andy? I've got two children. I've got two girls, one, 17, the other one's 14. Oh, wow. Okay, so you, I've got two girls.
Starting point is 00:13:21 You're about, you know, eight, ten years ahead of me. What's the jump between an eight and a ten year? Rob hopes career-wise as well, because you've got Rob's dream job. Do you want to be me, Rob? Do you know what? I don't know if I want to be you every day. Rob wants to hold you and kiss you, Andy. He can, wherever he wants.
Starting point is 00:13:38 No, I think my dream job is being teleported into the studio to laugh at the Tottenham fans. and then teleported out as soon as Arsenal lose. Do I mean, I don't think I've got the minerals to do it all season when it's up and down, do you know what I mean? And I'd have to quit if Arsenal went bad again. Rob, you've got my number. You can, at the drop of that, you can text me and go, can I come in now?
Starting point is 00:13:59 And we would move the schedule to get you in this year. Yeah, no, I definitely will come on. I've just been touring and my schedule's been mental this year. Rob's an absolute shocker. He's just said his dream is to be on something. And when he does, which he's done to make, I've got it out of it. No, but then I don't want to ruin it by being on it.
Starting point is 00:14:15 I want to listen to it. Oh, here we go. Here we go. I will come on. I've been busy. You're not a football fan? I am, yeah. I am a Plymouth fan.
Starting point is 00:14:24 See my hoodie. Okay. I've talked at length about Plymouth on the show before you with Charlie Baker. I'm getting on a miss that episode. A whole break. Every week when we lose, he gets me on. Can I ask a question to you, Josh? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:39 Whoever sits in that chair over your left shoulder, what's that for? His storage, because it's, we've just moved. in, so it's just been shoved in the corner. I would leave it there. I quite like that. It looks quite inviting. Also, Josh's partner is an interior designer. So Josh's office basically becomes a place for Rose to put things that she's about to sell or put in someone else's house.
Starting point is 00:14:59 So it's a revolving, it's almost like a generation game, but good housekeeping. And what's happening with you? What is this little room? What the fuck's going on with it? What's in that box? What, that one? Yeah. Oh, it's tough being a weatherman, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:15:14 It is tough. there will be a smart breeze coming in from the west. That, it's not exciting. That box had a battery in for my golf buggy art thing, broke, and I've got to send it back in that box. How big's a garden? No, I play, I'm on a golf on a golf course. So you've got your own golf buggy?
Starting point is 00:15:35 No, the trolley. All right, I'll find. I envisions of you like the Chuckle Brothers in a golf buggy. Around the estate. What episode was that when the Chucklebrother was in a golf cart. Don't they drive another in a thingy, aren't they? What are they in a rickshaw, sorry.
Starting point is 00:15:51 Oh, I said. I'm nodded. Anyway, back to your kids, Daddy. We need help because we've got daughters that are going to be that age soon. So what's the jump like between them being 10 and 8 when they still sort of love you and they're at primary school and they're like little daddy's girls to these sort of teenagers of 14 and 17? How's it going?
Starting point is 00:16:11 You know what? My mates of mine that have got girls that are older than mine. I had this conversation with them and they said you get to about 12.30 and they don't want to sit in your lap, don't want to cuddle daddy, don't want to associate with you. He's like,
Starting point is 00:16:23 can you drop me down the road at the school rather than outside the gates? And so I was sort of prepared for that. At the moment, nothing has changed. I'm so blessed. My kids... You're through it as well,
Starting point is 00:16:35 not through it, but the difficult bit is right. When they hit 12, 13, that's when the change is going to happen, right? My 14-year-old will still text me when I'm out from work, like in the pub, going, what time were you be home? Why aren't you home yet?
Starting point is 00:16:48 Oh. You're dinner? Why aren't you home? What time are you being? And my 17-year-old, there's two ways of 17-year-old can go, you can look at 17-year-old, and some of the kids in their school look like this.
Starting point is 00:17:01 They look like, they're 25, and you go like, oh, my God, that's horrific. Yeah. Thankfully, she's something, but she looks, she's like 15. She doesn't want to grow up quick. She doesn't take her facing makeup. up. She's not wearing short skirts and doesn't go clubbing a favourite Saturday night. He's sitting in front of the telly with us. No.
Starting point is 00:17:21 I'm very lucky at the moment. They're both wonderful children. Strictly on a Saturday? It depends what part of the year in. They absolutely love the 1% club. Yeah. And if there's nothing really odd, we don't really have an appointment of you anymore because telly's not like it used to be.
Starting point is 00:17:37 But we'll usually watch something like I'm a celebrity, we'll call that. But we'll make a point of sitting together in front of the TV. tell you honest. Celebrators? Did you do celeb traders together?
Starting point is 00:17:46 I was never a fan of that. Really? I wasn't a massive fan of normal traitors. Even the celib one?
Starting point is 00:17:53 Well, my problem with it is I found myself winding on the bits where they had tasks.
Starting point is 00:17:59 Yeah, that is boring that bit. Oh, that's for just chatting. You can talk about the sport
Starting point is 00:18:05 then. Yeah, but then I realized that all I was doing was fast forwarding to people just arguing.
Starting point is 00:18:10 Yes. Well, that's why they have the tasks, because otherwise they'd all go fucking insane. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:17 So I'm not a big fan of that. We've just started watching the films. What are the films called where... I know he did, I saw. Where... Final Destination? How did you know I was going to say that? He wants to be you and he's stalking you, Andy.
Starting point is 00:18:34 He's logged into your Netflix accounts so that he could learn how to be more like you. I've... I'm just very... I don't know. I do that quite a lot. yeah psychic or is that i think logical i think look he's a basic if you know everything about someone it's easy to imagine what films they watch
Starting point is 00:18:50 if your whole life is dedicated to stalking someone rob that's nuts because there's like literally a billion films i could have said we're watching and you've had final destiny i know but you can see if you're the cracking your curtains andy when you're watching it that is a bit weird didn't it i've got that if you see the new one bloodlines you've already seen it right you watch to skim over this i said i'm watching films at the moment And you just plug that one out of the year. Well, when you said, I know what you did last summer, this is my process of elimination, right?
Starting point is 00:19:20 I've gone, I know we did last summer. It's not that one because he's still trying to think. The other ones that came out around that time was Final Destination, and I know that both of the movies that came out around that time. And the only other films that came out around the time, have I know what you did last summer was final destination. Hear me out, but they were both relaunched again this year. So I imagine what's happened is,
Starting point is 00:19:41 in my head you've gone oh I used to watch this as a when I was younger half a second do you get emails occasionally Andy that say there's been a strange login to your Netflix account
Starting point is 00:19:51 from an unknown device No no because I again so I'm working out is that you've gone oh I'll watch them when I was younger now she's the same age oh we could bond over this watch the old ones
Starting point is 00:20:00 and then watch the new one with her if that could have been toy story yeah I don't know but I just I went with my gut I'm a gut guy I'm an instinct player but yeah
Starting point is 00:20:09 you find a destination he's weird that was weird actually wasn't it yeah I'm gonna write a film down now right random film okay Andy what did you have for don't tell us what did you have for breakfast
Starting point is 00:20:24 Rob gone hold on I don't eat breakfast I'm bad to say that he's not a breakfast guy but my life he's not eating breakfast he's just come back off the school run all panicked what colour socks have I gone
Starting point is 00:20:35 blue pink oh no no that's a foot Rob skin colour I thought they were pink What's your tattoo on your heel That is It's just lucky on one hill
Starting point is 00:20:49 Boy on the other This is final on there A destination When my little one was about Five I got to draw A picture of herself On my ankle
Starting point is 00:21:03 Oh she drew it I didn't get to She drew it And I looked at it and I thought I like that I'm going to keep that That's lovely Is that your only tattoo?
Starting point is 00:21:12 No, I've got about 18. Really? Where you got? Where about, you got a sleeve? Where in the country? Do I get her, but? No, no, on your body. My other foot, my older one at the time went,
Starting point is 00:21:24 can I write something on your other ankle? And I went, yeah, so she wrote, I love you when she was about seven. Oh, so you got that there? And I've just got various markings from different children in the school. You like to go from a mentor, just little, little words everywhere. Yeah. I've got different, different... Memento, that's a film, Rob.
Starting point is 00:21:43 Did you know I was going to say Memento? No, it looks... Yeah, it's a good film, actually. So, I've been sidetracked by thinking that I might be a witch. Have you got any tattoos, either are you? I've got one from Taskmaster. I've got my ex-name on my foot. Have you really?
Starting point is 00:22:00 Yeah. Well, underneath the foot? Like in Toy Story? No, on the kind of in Steph. That would have been great, wouldn't it? Where you pass a football? I'll get them underneath the foot. Were you not tempted by it to get an Andy?
Starting point is 00:22:11 Because it's on the parma, is it the partner's soul? That's the one. Yeah, the pain would be too immense. And also, on your foot, they tend to rub out, so it'd just be a waste of time. Tell me about it. I've basically got a blue blob now. Andy, with your sketch, right, you do afternoon. Are you always on the morning school run?
Starting point is 00:22:31 Is that when you see the girls in? Because you've got quite a strict routine with your job, where we're all over the place. Yeah. Yeah. It works out quite nice. I went for a stage where I would drop my oldest off at school and then go on the way back past the David Lloyd and drop in in there for an hour.
Starting point is 00:22:46 And that was like up to about six months ago, I was absolutely flying. I was doing four or five days a week and I loved it. I got home at 10. It was like, I've done an hour in the gym and the day's not even begun yet. Yeah. Because a few other bits and pieces have sort of happened,
Starting point is 00:22:59 you know, good like jobs or whatever. I just haven't been able to get to the gym. So that's just gone now. So now I'm dog walking. I'm a big dog walking fan of a lot. Are you dropping your kids then, still at 14 and 17. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:12 Yeah, they're proper princesses. And could they get the bus, so? Or is it, oh, getting the bus? Yeah, they could, yeah. I mean, they are princesses. My eldest, my 17-year-old to date, when we were coming out of the house, she went, I can't find my coat.
Starting point is 00:23:24 And I was like, oh, you know, what? And she went, oh, no, there it is. And my wife had put her coat on the radiator, so it was warm. Oh, my word. Oh, wow. Oh, man. They are not your traditional talk sport listener.
Starting point is 00:23:36 That's unbelievable. That's unbelievable. And I was like, why is Michael not on the radio? What's that in that? But that's, I think it's nice. So if you can do it, why not do it? Do you know what I mean? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:49 I think if you're already at work, fair enough, and maybe you've just got to go. But if you're laying in a warm bed and your kids waiting at a bus stop, you know, I agree. Why not get up and see them before school? Yeah, don't you see them otherwise, will you? Yeah, I think the world's shitty enough.
Starting point is 00:24:00 If you can just add a little bit of love in it somewhere, I think that's quite nice. Yeah, because I, you know, I used to get the night bus home from, like, nights out, and it's quite dangerous. I was at 17, 18. And the thought of letting my daughter do that now. I just sort of feel like, well, it's like,
Starting point is 00:24:13 oh, it's character building. I was like, no, it's just dangerous. You don't want that kind of. No, I totally leave it at the ground floor. Thank you very much. I totally agree with you. I mean, that analogy of laying in bed, keeping a warm while there, stand that bust up.
Starting point is 00:24:29 I just couldn't think of anything worse. So I'm not doing anything. Why would night? Yeah, exactly. And what about nights out, though, if you are in bed and they're out late, especially the 17-year-old. So the weekend, I was out in town doing something
Starting point is 00:24:41 and then by the time I got back was about midnight and I got into the house and I got a taxi can come and get me now so I'm a taxi service as well on weekends. But does part of you love that or is it? Yeah, it's just mentally easier to think I'm picking them up, they're not getting in a camp. Yeah, yeah, totally. Or getting a train or a bus.
Starting point is 00:24:59 It's just like I'm doing nothing. Why wouldn't I do it? I mean, they are flesh and blood, right? They are the most... Exactly, you're not going to sleep properly anyway knowing that they're waiting for a bus at 11 o'clock from their mates' house. So you might as well just get them and get them in. And do you have like, did you ever do like that thing
Starting point is 00:25:16 where you can track where they are on their phone and stuff like that? Yeah, so when my eldest was about four or three, I took her to a play group, the first ever play group I took her to. And she was there for like three hours. And I went to go and get a coffee around the corner and wait for it there. And so when I took her in, It was the first time I'd ever done it. And I said to the room, genuinely, I said to the woman,
Starting point is 00:25:41 do I get like a receipt or anything? You looked at me and I was nuts. I went, I just need proof to, she's here, right? If I come back in three hours and she's not here. And she's looking at him out, I'm mental. But I was thinking, well, hold on, this is the most important thing in the world that I have that I are. And I'm just going to, if it was, if it was like,
Starting point is 00:25:59 if you were a dry cleaners, I'd get a receipt for a pair of trousers, right? Yeah. And they were like, no, you don't get a receipt. I'm like, all right, okay. so do you think they should bring that in
Starting point is 00:26:10 yeah I think you should get a receipt kick me and drop them off or like a little number like a coat a cloak room and then you've forgotten your ticket
Starting point is 00:26:19 and they're like I'm sorry yeah but I can see it it's the blonde one at the back no no no no no no no no no
Starting point is 00:26:25 no mate don't take you I did buy I had a clear out look at this you've had a clear out yeah I know
Starting point is 00:26:32 you've had a clear out and that joke this is tidy by the way Yeah, fair enough. I've found this. I've done this to work audio-wise, but people are watching it. This can explain it. This is a GPS tracker that I bought when my eldest was about five or six
Starting point is 00:26:50 and went on a school trip. It's like a little key ring, but it's a GPS tracker, yeah, like an air tag. Exactly that, but it was like way before air tag. Yeah, it's big, isn't it? Considering the size of an air tag these days. Yeah, and I put it in her backpack. Obviously, she was unaware, on her first, a chip. And then when I was at the score gates
Starting point is 00:27:08 waiting for them all to come back, one of the mums went, I wonder how far away they are? And I went, she's 17 meters away. And she's like, and I was like, yeah, 16, 40. Like, Rob, with Final Destination. How's he doing it? It's so good. Have you seen the new one? Did you watch the new one? We've just finished three, I think.
Starting point is 00:27:26 Oh my God, the newest one's so good. It's amazing. I saw it in a cinema in Coventry alone. I couldn't do the cinema on my own. There's a few things I can't do. I couldn't go out for dinner on my own cinema. I'll find it a bit weird. Well, you could not be a comedian. Oh, yeah, of course you're on the road. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:41 Yeah, I wouldn't do it out of choice, but okay, I'll give you this day. You wake up in an industrial estate at a hotel that is absolutely dominated by snooker fans and pool fans that have been at some sort of pool event. And I know you're a big fan of that, but if you go to the bar, it's quite full of any snooker players there? No, it was more like a weird fan event.
Starting point is 00:28:02 Hold on. You're not talking about Milton Keyes, you? No, this was. Coventry. Coventry, I think. It might have been Milton Keynes on the way up to Coventry. No, you wouldn't have stayed in Milton Keynes. No, I was driving.
Starting point is 00:28:13 It's an hour off from London. Yeah, no, I was going somewhere. Anyway, you wake up in the morning in an industrial estate, Andy, and you've got to be leaving Coventry at 5 o'clock in the afternoon to go to your next gig, and you check out. First, you have a word with your tour booker
Starting point is 00:28:27 and say, surely there was a better hotel. So what you're doing on that industrial estate? If you've got another option than KFC and cinema alone, I'll take it. you buy your ticket though do you pretend that you're waiting for someone do you buy like i think cinema on your own during the day is i think cinema's one of the ones which is all right actually i i could do cinema i can do restaurant yeah i i've done music gig that's tougher that's tougher oh i couldn't do music gig um football i have you done football i could do football alone until did you go to coventry
Starting point is 00:29:03 you went to coventry on saturday rob yeah i went with a friend. You remember me a friend. I'd struggle with football, yeah. What did you
Starting point is 00:29:11 do the air coat to a friend? What sort of friend was it? It's a bit weird with it was how I'm going to me mate Dave or
Starting point is 00:29:17 something like that. Well, yeah, but that's because when you go your mate Dave, that's because you go somewhere
Starting point is 00:29:22 every week. I was in, well, this is, when I say friend, I say a very new friend where I text Lloyd because basically when I'm on tour
Starting point is 00:29:30 I need to feel the day. Have you got any other friends other than Lloyd Griffith? A couple, but he knows everyone in football so I went Lloyd who's a Coventry fan
Starting point is 00:29:39 You went on a blind date to Coventry City Yeah Wow I'd go on my own Who's a commentary fan And he went And he told me a few The people that are Coventry fans
Starting point is 00:29:47 And he went Oh a friend of mine John Josh Pew Yeah he's a common fan This guy called John Dawkins He's a music manager He was a manager of the enemy Do you know him?
Starting point is 00:29:57 The enemy Fuck You know he didn't know In Coventry He used to manage him Now he manages Tom Brennan And a few other people Anyway
Starting point is 00:30:04 So, Lloyd went, he's a really good bloke. He can sort you out of ticket. I think he's got a box. Right. So I went, oh, yeah, I'll be up for that. Again, the other option is line in a hotel room, potentially wanking myself to death. So I have to leave the building. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:18 You're not going to waint yourself to death at Coventry City with a stranger. No, not by the way they scored goals. It was unreal. Top of the league. Ten points clear. Anyway, so he followed me on Instagram. I'm running back and said, I'm up for Coventry if you can get to sort of your spare ticket. And anyway, you contacted the club.
Starting point is 00:30:34 We got invited to the ballroom. He ended up watching it with Doug King. And, yeah, so we had a brilliant time, and they were really welcome him and had a great time at Coventry, and I had a great day. And I think, though, that kind of approach to life opens up doors, yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:48 I went on a blind date of a man. He picked me up, dropped me off. We had a great dad. Did you hug or what? You know what? Actually, I was a bit worried because I thought, I don't know this bloke. He works in music.
Starting point is 00:30:59 It could be an absolute record, because you know what the music industry is like. But he was really nice and normal. got on really well to the point where actually at the end either of us could have said should we be actual friends but it feels too full on
Starting point is 00:31:13 when will you see him again when will I see him again I'd say text from him we've been texting yeah when did you last text so when did you last text so I took a photo of us at the thing
Starting point is 00:31:27 and then he was getting loads of grief because we got put on Sky Sports and it was me with him and anyway I took a photo of us at the thing and then I messaged to my Instagram and he went, oh can you send that to me on my phone because it's disappeared.
Starting point is 00:31:42 What? Because on Instagram if you send photos they don't always stay the whole time. It's like a one view for a fucking fishing scam here, right? So now, so then I sent it to him and we've been messaging. Did he say, can you send me a photo and £500 in cash? No, he didn't. I sent in the photo and he said,
Starting point is 00:31:58 thank, little thumbs up, thanks mate. And then I did message him saying 4-2 unstoppable and he gave me a little voice note about Coventry. And a voice note, he's coming on strong, isn't it? He's a big voice note guy, actually. You know why? Why? Because he wants one back.
Starting point is 00:32:12 Yeah, so that he can play it to his mates. Yeah, I'm not a big voice note guy. So I said. Why then you just speak now? Yeah. And then he can chop that up out the podcast, and he can pretend you've sent him a voice note for his mates. What should I send him?
Starting point is 00:32:25 Just say, hi, John. He's your friends now. Should I say that? I love you. I'm missing you. Yeah. Go on. No, he's.
Starting point is 00:32:33 Missing you is really mental. We'll stay quiet. I'm not saying I'm missing you. Go on then. No, no. What do you mean go on then? What am I saying? You're the riffmeister, Rob.
Starting point is 00:32:46 We're doing really well, hoping to play Premier League football next season. We'd love to go to another game with you again soon. Yeah. Yeah, okay. Hi, John. Rob here. Just want to say, like, really enjoyed the game at Coventry and we'd love to go to another game again soon.
Starting point is 00:33:04 Miss you. Great. There's no way you sent that. There's no way you sent that. Done. Oh my God. Oh, no. All right.
Starting point is 00:33:15 If he sends one back and it ends with Miss you too, then. Oh, God, yeah. Do you know the worst thing, Rob? He's going to take that of face value and then his mates are going to go, I tell you what, I heard that filming our podcast. They were right ripping Rob. God, having that message.
Starting point is 00:33:29 I've really got caught in the moment there. I feel so alive, but so nervous. Has it been blue-ticked, yeah? I don't think he's got to read within seconds when he sees you've sent him a voice now. Yeah. Yeah. He's not been that excited since the enemy released. I can't remember their fucking single.
Starting point is 00:33:48 What was their single called? Live and Die in these towns. Oh. He's, so I think he'll listen to that and think, okay, I had a good time, but that was a bit much. Oh, God, he's three dots. I've got three dots. I've got three dots He's got
Starting point is 00:34:04 Oh no Loads of laughy faces That's crack me up He said Miss you too mate You pick a game And we can hold hands And skip in together
Starting point is 00:34:14 Oh He seems like a nice guy It's based in London Rob Yeah he is Best one of the favour On the fly Just send a heart emoji on it Just a heart emoji
Starting point is 00:34:25 Yeah Lovely Oh there we go I'm gonna have to Tell him what's going on here No I don't think Hi, John. He's lying.
Starting point is 00:34:34 He can't hear us. John, I'm on the podcast. Andy Goldstein and Josh Riddaker made me send that first voice note. The Missue bit was a bit full on, but I did enjoy the football and hopefully it goes another game. See you later, mate. Oh, my God. It's embarrassing. See you like.
Starting point is 00:34:49 Oh, that failed to upload. Oh, God. Oh, anyway, right. I'll sort that out later. So, what kind of holidays do with your kids? That's amazing. Are your kids into sport, Andy? Because obviously it's such a huge part of your life.
Starting point is 00:35:07 Are they interested in it? My eldest isn't at all. My little one plays football and hockey, and she runs. Oh, wow. She loves her sport, the little one. Although, annoyingly, at the weekend, she was running around the lounge, claiming a dog, and then all of a sudden we had a big thud.
Starting point is 00:35:24 Yeah. She stubbed her toe, and my wife took to A&E yesterday. Fucking out. Oh, God. She's broken her toe. So she can't do anything for six weeks. She loves dancing as well, so she can't do anything for six weeks,
Starting point is 00:35:36 so she's devastated. Did you support, Andy? I'm a Manchester United fan. And have you managed to pass that on? Yes. You have. I took them to Old Trafford to see May Nighter play Spurs a few seasons back when Ronaldo played.
Starting point is 00:35:52 Oh, wow. And as we come out, she said, is it like this every week? And I went, yeah, this is the way of ten years ago. because you used to work up there loads didn't you used to do a show from MUTV where you were at every home game, is that right? Yes.
Starting point is 00:36:08 And away or just home? Away ones as well, but we do the away ones from Old Trafford as well. Yeah, so you have to go to Manchester basically every week and you're based in London, is that right? Yeah, and so it just took its toll because they're long days, I'm leaving five o'clock in the morning and I'm getting home at 1 o'clock in the morning. And it is...
Starting point is 00:36:26 At weekends as well when that's important. So is that the reason why you're still? step back from that. That's exactly the reason, yeah. I really love doing it. I really did. And even as like a grown adult standing on the pitch and seeing young kids behind you like a 22 playing for me,
Starting point is 00:36:39 he's warming up. I'm still a bit like, oh, get that. Look at him behind him. Yeah, of course. He never goes. It's like Rob, when he sees John from Coventry, he's got a similar reaction. Oh, me and the dog, he's actually replied.
Starting point is 00:36:51 I told him what you wound me up. And he said, Goldstein, great hair. Josh, my mate who I said looks like him, manages Pete Doher to. He does look like. Oh yeah, I've met him. I've got his number. Jazz. Yeah, him. You look like him, apparently. You know what? Talking of great hair,
Starting point is 00:37:05 I don't know if you're aware of it, lads, but I have Goldstein's Golden Paste is out now. Oh, so is this what you're plug? You're on promo? Yeah. So you've got your own head. And we can't see that because it's reflecting in your, have you got one of the... Oh, that's it. Goldstein's golden paste. You've got your own hair. Yeah. Talk to us about that then.
Starting point is 00:37:24 Okay. So about six months ago, I contacted the... this guy, Damon Barber, who owned it, who made unbelievable award-winning hair products and said, what's he called? Damon. Damon Barber? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:40 And he works in hair? Yeah. Well, I'm guessing that. I mean, that's not his name. Oh, sorry. And I said, I've got the best head of hair that anyone you've ever seen of my age or any age for that matter. I should have my own hair product.
Starting point is 00:37:54 And I agree with you. And then so we put one together. Yeah. And it's incredibly successful. And I think, in my own opinion, it's a great stocking filler. Right. Where can you, where can you pocket? Like, how do you come up with the paste?
Starting point is 00:38:07 Like, are you doing, you know, like in The Apprentice where they're like mixing it up and stuff? Were you doing that in, like, factory? He was doing that. He sent me a load of different samples and he said, what do you think of these? And I'll go, I like the smell of that. I like the texture that. But the hold of this one's no good. I tried this one all day and by about two o'clock, nothing was left.
Starting point is 00:38:25 And then eventually we came up with what he's now called. all this thing's golden paste. I don't know. Damonbaba.com you can buy it from. How much is it a tub? I think it's 34 pounds. Whoa. Hold on,
Starting point is 00:38:39 lad. Buy cheap, buy twice. Yeah, and it's a big old tub. It's a big old tub. How many months do you think people are getting out of a tub?
Starting point is 00:38:48 You'll get over 300 applications with it. A hundred applications, that's almost a year. Would you like to send you both one? Yeah. Yeah, I would actually. I'll take a golden paste. Okay.
Starting point is 00:38:59 I'd take a golden pace. I think you both look good with my pace in your hair. Oh, there he goes. There he bloody goes. Yeah. Next question. Have you had to play the father to,
Starting point is 00:39:12 has either of your children had a boyfriend and you've had to be a kind of or girlfriend or girlfriend? And you've had to play that role yet. Boys are a big part of their world. My little one is, I think she wants a boyfriend. She's on the apps.
Starting point is 00:39:37 She's not on the apps yet. My, they haven't got, they haven't got, you answer your question is my oldest has had a boyfriend before. I met him once. She was going into town with him, so I met them,
Starting point is 00:39:50 I dropped her at the station. I can't have a walk into the station. And I shook his hand, and I gave it a little bit more. That's a beautiful voice. and went, look after it today. And he went, okay. Oh, poor kid.
Starting point is 00:40:06 If you're to mark your normal handshake out of 10 squeeze-wise and that hand shake out of 10 squeeze-wise, what are we looking at? Probably normal as an 8, I think it's important. Okay, you're quite heavy with a hand. A heavy one of them, are you? I met a friend of mine's daughter's boyfriend. But when he shook my hand for the first time,
Starting point is 00:40:24 he was like he was passing me a salmon. I didn't know him, and I went, listen. that needs to improve. It needs to be... Oh, God, that's real toxic. Yeah. Kids don't know how important that handshake is, right?
Starting point is 00:40:38 Is it? Is it that important? How soft was it? It might be in talks more towers when Darren Goff seeing you in a lift, but like... No, no, no, no. A good handshake, come on.
Starting point is 00:40:47 Do you know where they do good handshakes and big strong hands, Australia? Because all of the people there play cricket or Aussie rules football. So they've got big strong hands. They don't... You farm a ball. can't do keep you up ease, but they can rip your hand off
Starting point is 00:41:01 in a handshake. I don't like a handshake where you feel like someone's trying to prove something. I always think, what's wrong with you? What are you trying to... I know what you mean. I don't mean that. I just... Not a squeeze, just firm. Yeah. I always struggle...
Starting point is 00:41:17 Heavy, not hard. I always struggle when I shake a woman's hand. Because I sort of turn it around... Not a problem of talk sport. Princess Guy Allen. What? That's a not of the problem.
Starting point is 00:41:29 at dog sport. No, there's plenty of women that work for talk sport. And he's shaking all their hands. And he's shaking all their hands. And I'm shaking. So what do you do with a woman's hand? I sort of, I don't know why,
Starting point is 00:41:40 but I sort of turn it. Right. Like that. It goes into like 17th century. And then do you kiss her on the top of the hand? I just go into, and then I always go,
Starting point is 00:41:51 sorry, I'd never know how to shake a woman's hand. And then that's really weird, I think. Yeah. Just shake it the same. No, I think that's rude. yeah but the way you're squeezing it
Starting point is 00:42:00 but just maybe go a bit softer what about the kiss on a cheek of a woman on the cheek I think no just handshake the problem with the kiss on the cheek is if you go once and they lean in for the second yeah yeah fresh
Starting point is 00:42:14 oh what's happening now also as well when you meet people on a night out and they've got women got a lot of makeup on or a TV show they've got a lot of makeup on if you get too close you can ruin their makeup and then get it on your clothes same for Jordan
Starting point is 00:42:25 so on Exactly like Simon Jordan. Hack the holidays with the PC Holiday Insiders report. Try this PC Porchetta, crackling, craveworthy. You gonna eat that? Who are you? I'm the voice for the next ad, car commercial. But I noticed that show-stopping roast and...
Starting point is 00:42:46 Help yourself. Mmm, designed for indulgence. Precision crafted to navigate every corner of my mouth. All for just $18. Okay, okay. Try the season's hottest flavors from the PC Holiday Insiders report. Please feast responsibly. Out of all the people you've met,
Starting point is 00:43:05 because you've met loads of people on TalkSport, and to you fair, you've got an incredible sort of phone book where you get like exclusives from like Noel Gallagher and stuff like that, and obviously Robbie Williams is a good friend of yours. Who out of all the sort of famous people and athletes that you've met has gone too hard with a hand?
Starting point is 00:43:21 Is there any one that stands out? I bet Eddie or Barry Hearn. I bet that's a handshake and a half. I bet Barry Eiff. urns wobbles up and down a lot. Barry Barry's coming in tomorrow, actually, so I can test that one out. Yeah. They've both got great handshakes. They're old school, right?
Starting point is 00:43:34 If you could text Rob, they spit out before a deal. Tell him an update on Barry Hurons handshake, then we'll pop it in the intro to this episode. Yeah. I was in your voice note. Of Barry Hearns. And then maybe, yeah, maybe getting to review yours would be quite good. All right. I'll film the whole thing for you. Yeah, that'll be
Starting point is 00:43:50 fine. Just pop it on a YouTube for us. I can tag us in, monetize it. Thank you very much. That will be a page soon, isn't it? You know I am in London to test out people's handshakes. People will be fucking watching that for days. Oh, do you know what? That's a great little real series for you.
Starting point is 00:44:07 London Bridge. London Bridge. Because you're famously, it's a handshakes. You know what really fucking is? There's so much shit on social media. Like, people are running out ideas. The thing I hate is close your eyes and open them when you hear a centre off
Starting point is 00:44:21 you'd like to play alongside. Yeah. You just see if a friend are going like that. and then opening Marcel this eye what fuck's important of that people read out stuff to us now well you could actually see them
Starting point is 00:44:33 like coming off of like these pundits finishing a whole shift of punditry and the socials person grabs him and they go right one to ten and you can see like Roy King go ugh exactly that you've got to feel for that pun
Starting point is 00:44:48 you've got to feel for that poor little social media kid he's 23 he's fresh out of a media degree at Bournemouth uni and suddenly he's having to corner Jamie Carriger to ask him what the worst away ground is. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:01 Or one I hate is, can you blind rank these strikers? And then they go, first one is like, messy, you go, oh, is that going to be?
Starting point is 00:45:07 Like, no, no, it's just guff, isn't it? Yeah. But, you know, keeps me and Josh Fett.
Starting point is 00:45:13 Anyway, we're looking forward to the handshake series, Andy, and when's it? Honestly, if you do talk sport with Andy Golds
Starting point is 00:45:19 doing the handshake series and you could do the face... Goldstein's golden handshakes. Oh, but it'll be pathetic. It'll be like, Oh, Andy, quick, quick, come downstairs. Simon Cowles on Chris Evans.
Starting point is 00:45:29 We need to get his handshake. You're still mocking, right? What will happen? It will be really successful. And in about a year's time, one of you or both of you will be trying to get to me going, I hope you're after the hand shake. Yeah, that's what would happen.
Starting point is 00:45:42 Andy, do you want to come on the handshake shows on? The Mr. Handshake, you've basically got, he's career. Yeah. Was it bad, not ban, what, that was... Banzai? Mr. Shaky hands, right? How long did you have? And yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:55 Well, no, it's not about length. It's about grip. All right. I promise you, I will video it tomorrow. And you know, like the blind, you know, Dave Portnoy is to do the pizza review. You just do handshake reviews. What about people that you can shake their hand?
Starting point is 00:46:07 And then with the other hand, they grab the eye. I hate that. That's very Trump. Yeah, it goes last. Exactly. Yeah, that'd be. And also just random city boys coming into London Bridge. They'll have some wild handshakes.
Starting point is 00:46:17 Yeah. And what do you feel about like a kind of a handshake into a hug, Andy? what from who give me a scenario uh Barry Hearn tomorrow handshake into a hug you know that's more of like there's not a handshake it's more of like the oh the that one the that one yeah like the arm wrestle dap lean in I always sometimes you'll go for the handshake and someone will go no oh come on come on I don't it's in my head it's Tom Davis do you know what I mean
Starting point is 00:46:47 that kind of okay I always find that the bigger the person the more they want to hug you you. Yeah, like this show of power like I'm bigger than you so I can like where this goes. I don't like
Starting point is 00:47:01 handshakes from me I always if someone comes up Oh whoa well you fucking change your tune ain't you? No, I've always been like that
Starting point is 00:47:07 You used to love handshakes You're telling me how hard you do them No, if someone comes up to me in the street that I don't know and wants a handshake I always say I'm a fist pumper
Starting point is 00:47:14 and just Pump or bumper fist pumper or bumper fist pump Anything other than a handshake right, up of a Vladimir Critchco You're going to have to change that if you become
Starting point is 00:47:25 Britain's number one handshaker. Like, it's going to be a difficult argument when your main fame is that you're the handshake. That'll be the big sort of news on Pop Bitch. There'll be stories that Andy Goldstein secretly loves fist bump, he doesn't actually like the handshake. But Clitchco only does fist bombs
Starting point is 00:47:39 to stop getting germs. I quite like that. Yeah. Yeah, I quite like that. Anyway, so what other stuff do your kids do? Homework? Lots of homework. Lots of homework.
Starting point is 00:47:53 How bothered are you about academics? Because I feel like you're more of the, you know. Let him on to Rob. Let's not steer him. Let's see what he says. What was your question? What are you like around education and school? Because I feel like you're a bit more of the school of life kind of guy
Starting point is 00:48:08 than you are bothered about. He's steering him again. He's desperate for Andy to. No. Your question will have no influence on my answer. I just want to make that clear. Thank you. Both my kids go to provide.
Starting point is 00:48:19 And also your answer will have no impact to my next question as well, just so you know. Yeah, because Rob's already thinking about the handshake stuff. I already know the answer and I'm getting ready for the next one. That's how my brain works. Both my kids go to private school at the moment
Starting point is 00:48:32 or not at the moment they've to do. For a week? I'm at the price of it nowadays. Depending how the budget plays out. Yeah, you're right. My little one's very much like me. I think she'll do really well in life but not necessarily because she's studied really hard.
Starting point is 00:48:49 And my little one is incredible, Like my big one's frighteningly clever. About three or four years ago, the light was on at the bottom of the door about 11 o'clock at night on a school night. You know, so you know the lights on in the room. Yeah, my wife opened the door. We call the eldest boo, and it named boo.
Starting point is 00:49:07 And my wife went, boo, it's like 11 o'clock at night, why are you up? And she said, with the iPad in front of us, you went, I'm so sorry, I was just teaching myself Japanese. Oh, wow. And she was. The little one would be in the other room, like ordering the Chinese.
Starting point is 00:49:19 That's the difference between the two of them. Right. One's Japan, one's China. Did they get on? They really get on. COVID was a tough time for a lot of kids. A lot of kids suffered because they didn't get on. I mean, their best of friends.
Starting point is 00:49:37 They, in fact, throughout that period, they then decided to sleep together every night. They were young together during the day. They were literally side by side all the time. And it was only about two and a half years ago that they sort of like went right every night we're going to go back to her so they missed each other
Starting point is 00:49:54 you know it's really tough oh that's lovely and what about when they have play dates with their other or not play days they're older now but when they've got their friends over do they clash that's where I find ours clash a bit while they're all joining together they all join in yeah
Starting point is 00:50:07 I'm really lucky they're just so are you a great parent or you've been lucky what's going on Annie because it feels like you've the kids are in a good space of that or you're married to a great parent my wife's unbelievable with it my wife's incredible with it She does most of the sort of, well, she does all the whole.
Starting point is 00:50:23 You see the default parent, you'd say. She picks them up from school, and I don't see until eight, half past eight. All the school problems, when they come out of the gates, and they, oh, this happened to this. She's dealing with it all. Do you live in London, Andy? Just outside. I live in Essex, yeah. So you've got a commuting every day and then?
Starting point is 00:50:42 Yeah, but it's an easy commute. It's 40 minutes, and it's really quick. Do you race home for the evening, or do you've got to? consider like. I'll get a train. Rodd knows that already. Which time train is it, Rob? Yeah, it's C to C.
Starting point is 00:50:59 C, um, a quarter past six. I meet Rob every night, actually. Yeah, yeah, just for a degree for about the show, my favourite thing that needs improving, quick handshake. I'm going to get a film tomorrow, right? It's going to be final destination. Can you remind? Yeah, no problem.
Starting point is 00:51:13 Yeah, find it. Blood Florence. There you go. That's what he does. Andy, is it the final question we ask everyone this. Now, you've already said your partner's amazing, but what one thing does she do that makes you go, oh my God, she's an amazing parent?
Starting point is 00:51:25 Can't believe I have her with me being a parent. And what's the one thing she does that if she was to listen, that you find a bit annoying and frustrating? And if you was listening, she'd go, yeah, you might have a point there. Why would anyone answer that second question? Because they're in a really confident, comfortable relationship, and, you know, they're in a relaxed position where communication is key and they can take criticism.
Starting point is 00:51:47 But, you know, if you don't want to do that, because you're really falling apart, that's fine. Oh, their wife going through the menopause when they answer that question. By the law of averages, we must have hit that at one point, yeah. I think that should be the third question. Yes, is your wife going through the menopause?
Starting point is 00:52:03 Yeah. Okay, well, we'll get that first. Question one. Is your wife going through the menopause? Yeah. Cool. And how is that? She's absolutely fine.
Starting point is 00:52:11 Yeah, good. Good, perfect. She deals with it, yeah. Strong handshake every morning and then you get on with your lives. A lot of those don't understand how bad that can be, by the way. Yes, absolutely, yeah. I think it's a bit sort of skimmed over.
Starting point is 00:52:25 But it's, I wouldn't want it. Do I mean, if you look to my diary, it was menopause this week. I think that's a great t-shirt. Menopause, I won it. Well, we can skip the negative one then, but what's positive? In answer to your first question, what does she do? I don't know if everyone or no one's answered like this, but everything. she does absolutely everything
Starting point is 00:52:49 my missis like without a doubt my rock she does absolutely everything from from breakfast to the morning for the kids to dinner waiting for me
Starting point is 00:52:57 to just every she does everything really sort of like all my kids are as great as they are it's all down to her she's fantastic so is there a hot dinner
Starting point is 00:53:06 waiting for you every single day when you get in yeah I mean it's because she's made for her and the kids and mine's in the oven
Starting point is 00:53:12 yeah but she's she's fantastic she's fantastic she's fantastic although You can leave it if you want now, Andy. No, the one thing. I've mentioned it.
Starting point is 00:53:24 Yeah. But it's sort of, I'm going to kick myself in the nuts of it because it's such a tiny thing, but it makes me go, why? So this is really small, but on the work surface in our kitchen, there's a little box where you put food when you finish eating your dinner, right?
Starting point is 00:53:41 Yeah. And in that box is a bag. Yeah. And when she takes that bag out, and does it up and takes it to the bin whilst making the house look perfect yeah forgets to put a new bag in
Starting point is 00:53:55 and I find myself having to do that oh and I think you should have remained silent yeah that does that did come across quite badly actually I don't understand why Reid's terrible that why I love it take well but if she's already doing everything
Starting point is 00:54:14 yeah yeah but exactly if you're doing everything do everything or don't make your mind up see one or the other that'll be it'll be the bag in there do you ever do you ever put like
Starting point is 00:54:26 like the roll of the bags at the bottom so that's already in there you can just do it from then they get the bag juice on them yeah they don't like that bag juice I don't like that bag juice on yeah that's the thing you've decided to but the bags are a meter I've measured it a meter away
Starting point is 00:54:44 right and it's yeah when you were made measuring it, could you've been putting a bag in the box rather than measuring the distance that your wife hasn't travelled? I just put the bag in and I thought, well, and as I opened the door, you think I'm joking about it, as I open the door, there was a tape measure. Right. I'm just
Starting point is 00:54:58 curious what the... Yeah, well, the distance is one metre. Yeah. And I thought, should I use that in an argument or not? Yeah. What did your wife say when you brought it out? Quite soon. I haven't bought it out. She's going to get you felters after this.
Starting point is 00:55:14 Yeah, yeah, of course. if she's listening maybe learn from it I'm going to tell you now she may not be listening but a hundred percent someone that knows her is that's getting back that's getting back have you both answered that question too? Yes numerous times
Starting point is 00:55:35 at different points over the podcast because you know stuffed pages at the moment the thing that's frustrating me about Lou would be she used zip lock things to put the Christmas decorations up but on the banisters of the stairs but she snips them off and they're pointing up so we have now got razor blade sharp bits of plastic
Starting point is 00:55:55 so I've cut my palm why don't you swing them around? We need to and I said why don't I do that and then she said no wait till I'm home so I can do it but then she didn't do it yesterday so they're still on there but she won't allow me to do it because I might not do it the right why so this morning I don't know can you?
Starting point is 00:56:12 I mean literally it's just spinning it yeah exactly but she's pulled it so tight that you have to snip off and go again and so yeah so me and my daughter's too tight and you've raised two problems there and me and my daughter have got cut hands at the moment and she won't let you fix it yourself really isn't it but I think abuse is a strong word well you're you're getting cut you and your daughter are getting slashed to pieces yeah pretty much because what's yours um she's just cold and doesn't love me.
Starting point is 00:56:46 You knew that when you said yes. Yeah. To the wedding. Right, Andy, thank you so much. Good, thank you, Golden Hair Paste. And what time's your show on TalkSport for those? Until seven weekdays. There you go.
Starting point is 00:56:56 And how about it by the hair paste? That's very kind of at Damon Barber.com or in a couple of Wednesday's this guy out in a few weeks, right? Don't know. No idea. Okay, you're available at next.com. Oh. Yes, thank you.
Starting point is 00:57:09 And also Amazon. Nice. Oh, heard of it. It's a biggie. Good luck of it. I will, what I'll do? I'll send you both a pot. Yes, please.
Starting point is 00:57:17 I'll waive the bill. I don't remember that. Absolutely. I'm not paying 34 quid for a bit of your gunk. And I will send you a video of me shaking hands. That's what I'm here. Please. Thank you very much, Andy.
Starting point is 00:57:27 Right, Andy, see you next time. God bless you.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.