Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S11 EP39: Kate Garraway
Episode Date: December 26, 2025Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the brilliant broadcaster and journalist - Kate Garraway MBE. Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywh...ere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: Hello@lockdownparenting.co.uk Follow us on instagram: @parentinghell A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: hello@keepitlightmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Quick trigger warning for this episode, we do discuss Father Christmas and elves, if you're listening with children.
And also we do discuss the passing of Kate's late husband, Derek, and the impact that's had on them as a family.
Hello, I'm Rob Beckett.
And I'm Josh Widdickham.
Welcome to Parents in Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky.
So, to make ourselves and hopefully you, feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting,
Each week, we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping.
Or hopefully how they're not coping.
And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener, with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting, woe.
Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times where none of us know what we're doing.
Hello, you're listening to Parents in Hell with...
Robin. Can you say Rob Beckett?
Rob Beckett.
And can you say Josh Whitaker?
He's been again
Good job
Why do you take your horn out
He's called her on it
A couple of Aussies
He's been bootlegging
He's been bootlegging
Hi Rob, Josh and Michael
Hello from Newcastle
Australia
Yeah but
subtle level accent there right
Robin
In 27 months having a go at saying your names
He was so impressed with himself
That insisted on more tries
This was the first of seven takes
So nearly three
I've been listening since pregnancy
It got me through the early days when everything truly feels hectic
and now the general struggles of parenthood.
Thanks for the last day section relatable from Casey.
Thanks, Casey from Newcastle Australia.
Right, I bet it's well up there,
but she's going for a fucking lovely walk in the sun.
I can't be bothered of this weather.
I love it.
I love it.
Dark at four.
My gig's at eight.
Fuck, it feels like I'm doing a gig at 3 a.m.
It's fucking...
Because he got booked 10 years ago before everyone started doing them fucking earlier.
and then the next tour is going to be fucking matinee.
But you love it.
Do you like this?
Wait this time of year and the cold and the dark.
It's miserable.
Yeah.
It's the best.
Rob, you don't like this time of year.
I love Christmas.
I love Christmas.
I love being a bit of music.
Would you like a sunny Christmas?
No.
No.
Do you know what?
Like, I don't like it being dark and I don't like it when it's wet.
I like the cold and wrapping up.
The wet does my head in.
And it's been so wet the last sort of three or four weeks in it.
It's constantly pissing down.
And, but the Christmas spirit.
The only reason Christmas exists is because someone has to invent something
because it's so fucking miserable between December to February.
So that's have something in the middle to liven it up.
Because January to Feb, that is danger zones for miserableness.
Yeah, I enjoy December.
But January, you've got to go in at full pout.
Oh, my God.
January's tough.
You've got to have stuff to do in January.
January lockdown was the worst January on record.
Remember that?
The lockdown January.
Yeah, yeah.
Because we thought it was all right.
And then it all went potty again.
before Christmas. But that's why we're here to bring joy, bring a little bit of just real
life chat to get everyone through those dark winter months. Right, guys, we're in it together.
Right, guys? Imagine you're a local radio, DJ. How would you approach it, Rob?
Hello, and welcome to the show. Got Josh Whitacum here. We've got some great songs for you,
great chat, great guests, and most importantly, each other. Do you see where I stumbled,
right, to pretend to be sincere? Yeah. I could, that's what I, have you? Not really. I'm, I'm,
I'm a seasonal DJ.
Right.
I'm dictated by the mood.
I couldn't do Radio 2 breakfast
where you've got to be happy all year
because it's not how I feel,
but most of the time I'm jolly.
The thing that I would struggle with
if you were on like one of those daily shows
is how do you keep it feeling exciting?
I'd have to be in a gang on my own.
Yeah, yeah.
I think I could get away that if I was with three mates
doing a breakfast show,
I'd have to have someone on the show
that's more miserable than me
that I could go, well, at least
I'm happier than that one.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There's not many gangs anymore, are there?
It's gone out of fashion on the radio.
There's gangs at Capitol, and I think they're brilliant.
Capital, obviously, is a gang.
That's a breakfast one.
And then Magic's more,
is Gokwan and Harris.
Oh, that's two.
But it's not a gang, yeah.
I think I need more than two.
I need a gang to have anyone,
or is he flying solo?
No, but then the thing is,
if you are a gang, you're not going to be paid as much
because there's three of you doing one person's job.
That's why sometimes they lean on people, you know,
on the news or in traffic bringing them in,
because you've got people, but you're not having to pay them,
or they get the producer to start chatting
because they're not having to pay them on air fee.
It's a weird thing in radio.
There's like a career in not being the radio host,
but being an excellent foil.
Almost like an attack midfielder.
You're just constantly playing the ball through.
You get a couple of goals yourself, most shows.
But you're basically feeding the goal.
to score. Have we got someone on from the radio? Who have we got today, Michael?
Kate Garraway, who is a radio host, obviously. I'll tell you what's what we're doing on this.
Let's talk about Kate Garraway. So A, we'll talk to her about traitors, because I'm very excited
about traitors. I actually DMed Kate Garoway to say that I thought she was brilliant on traitors
because I thought she came across as not taking herself too seriously and a real laugh and
not competitive. Yeah, she just was having, and I felt like she was just having a lovely time
with some really great people
and then when they were going
who do you think it is Kate
she was a bit like
oh I don't know
I just quite enjoying hanging out
yeah exactly
I thought I liked that attitude
the other thing about Kate Garroway
and we've discussed
the motorbikes we
occasionally have to get
if we go between gigs before
yes
Garaway is a big use of those motorb
oh she loves to ride
she goes from GMB
good morning Britain
good morning Britain
to her show on Smooth
which starts at 10 a.m. I think
Oh, yeah, come on.
So I want to ask Kate Garrae is from radio, Rob.
So you want to ask Kate Garroway what it was like doing the traitors
and if she likes to get in the motorbikes?
Yeah, that's all I want to ask Kate Garroway.
Should we ask her about parenting as well?
Yeah, probably it won't be worth people.
Oh, there's one other thing I want to ask Kate Garroway.
Go on.
A clip I've always been obsessed with of Kate Garroway.
Okay.
It's starting to feel like, you know, there's sort of autograph hunters that wait outside
smooth?
You're starting to sound like, what would you ask Kate Garrow if you got a chance?
Kate, what's it like getting the motorbike?
Mike, what was celebrity traitors like?
And one last thing, this clip-hutty interview, I've got a question about this.
So, do you remember when Kate Garroway did I'm a celebrity get me out of here?
And I remember she'd being on it, but not any particular clip.
She was on it with Andrew Maxwell.
Yes, comedian, Andrew Maxwell?
Yeah.
So he arrived on a speedboat.
Yeah?
Yeah.
And he was in the distance.
Kate Garrowy was already there.
And there was an incredible moment where she looked at the speedboat and the
distance and she said oh it's the Irish comedian Andrew Maxwell oh yes yes please yeah so are you suggesting
that she may not have known who it is and then asked who it was and then the production went
as an Irish comedian called Andrew Maxwell I'm suggesting the production have said I think what's
happened is the production we need to be clear who Andrew Maxwell is to the audience Kate could you
just say yeah because I'd say Andrew Maxwell like he's brilliant one of the best comedians
Yeah, yeah, of course.
But he hasn't done load and loads of telly.
He's done a bit of, he does the X on the Beach voiceover,
and he's been on some stand-up shows.
But I don't think she's in, he's in Kate Garaway's orbit.
No, so I want to ask Kay Garaway if she did recognize Andrew Maxwell on speedboat from 50 yards away.
Or whether.
She was asked by the Dungeon to maybe, and she slipped it in verbatim rather than,
oh, it's Andrew Maxwell.
Oh, he's a comedian, Irish guy.
Yeah.
Which is the way I would, you know, slip it in all one word.
but she's gone, it's the Irish comedian, Andrew.
But she's done it like a TV host, hasn't she?
Yeah, of course, yeah.
But she's welcoming him on Zoom during lockdown of Togne.
Yeah, exactly.
Andrew Maxwell.
Yeah, so I'll be all scared about that as well.
So that's something to look forward to.
Perfect.
Well, I'll tell you, well, I imagine she's not been asked.
I imagine she's been asked about celebrity traitors.
Yeah.
But maybe not the other two.
So it'd be good to cover new ground.
Yeah, exactly.
First question, don't worry about the kids.
I'm a celebrity.
I'm a celebrity.
I'm a celebrity.
I'll tell you go.
Well, just let's get her on and bloody find out.
Yeah.
Okay, here she is.
Kate Garraway, hello.
Hello.
Hello.
How nice to be here.
We're very excited to have you on, Kate.
We've been trying to get you for a little while,
but you're very busy.
You're a very busy woman.
You're very, do you know what you are, Kate?
You're verging on national treasure these days, aren't you?
No, I'm not verging on a national treasure.
Oh, you're there?
I have a slightly crumbling institution, to be fair.
but I find myself strangely drawn.
You know, you get things bombarding you.
My algorithm is really disturbing online.
So I'm increasingly getting things about preserving old buildings,
which is a sign of age.
And I find myself going between that and the TikTok shop for aging creams.
And the two things are merging into one.
So, yeah.
How's your experience on the TikTok shop, Kate?
Because I'm having a terrible time with some incredible tat
that if I saw in real life, I'd never buy,
but I'm being seduced by the instant satisfaction of ordering it.
It's really, so I'm really new to TikTok.
I decided to launch myself on an unsuspecting TikTok public.
Just for celebrity traitors, I thought, come on,
if you're going to do it, you might as well do it now
because there's a whole world that may be more interested vaguely
because I'm on celebrity traitors.
Of course it's completely addictive.
It's what everyone says.
The experience of TikTok shopping,
I think it's a little bit like a pharmacy
when you're on holiday.
You know, when you went with your parents
to like Devon or somewhere?
And there was very little in the village.
It was gorgeous, actually.
It's sort of a place I'd love to go to now.
But when you're a kid, perhaps less so.
And you go into the pharmacy,
you sort of find myself looking at hair clips
and products that you would never normally look at.
Just while your parents get some sight,
like, I don't know, sun cream or something.
And I find myself doing that too.
I think, oh, actually I need.
a projector.
Clearly TVs are out
and projectors are in now. Yeah, I must
look at this projector of it. Of course
it's nonsense, isn't it? But it's very
seductive. Obviously, we chat
about parenting on this. You've got two teenage
kids. What ages are they now? So
16 and 19. So the boy
the little bit the baby
has turned 16 and the daughter
is 19 at
uni. Can we first, first,
relate that to celebrity traitors we will right i know you're are you bored of talking about it
yeah no god no i mean i'm the sort of person that in 10 years time is going to be going do
know i was once on celebrity traitors costing people in the street what can i ask firstly
that because that must be have been the big decision when you got offered it right because
obviously it's a big show you don't know how big it's going to be but you know that the normal one's
but is it a situation where you're losing touch with your kids for two weeks?
Yeah.
So that was really difficult, actually.
That was the only challenge because obviously, initially when I was offered it,
I don't get offered a huge amount, let's say that first of all.
You're here, Kate.
You're a spank ball in Marse Singer.
You're right, actually.
You're right.
When it was secrets to traitors for ages,
I came obviously first out in Masked Singer, a Spag Bowl.
Brilliant fun, though.
And then one, Celebrity Bake Off.
So I said to everybody, it wasn't Celebrity Bake-Ov,
it wasn't Masked Singer, I can say no more.
In other words, it wasn't first or last.
So, yeah, no, it was very tricky with that
because it's obviously been a grim old time.
And I don't think you can really ever say
or we're sorted now.
But I definitely felt like it was a really,
really tricky period. When I said yes, it was quite a sort of calm period and then things
kicked off with my daughter and things are tricky with my son. But I do have an amazing
sister-in-law called Auntie Dye, who is phenomenal and also an obsessive fan of traitors.
And she said, do you know what? And she hadn't been able to visit for a long time because
she had her own health problem. She said, look, I was saying to myself, if I come next time,
I'm going to come for a long period.
And we also thought I'd be first out and murder
because I wanted to be a faithful.
Because it could be like two and a half weeks
or two days, couldn't it?
Why did you want to, why did you want to be a faithful?
Well, I now realise, of course,
that was one of my first and one of many errors
because in a way, I had this idea.
I knew I couldn't look people in the eye and lie,
because I've always been terrible at that.
And I know Alan...
Well, he didn't he?
didn't he actually did say you can lie the blessing but um but i just thought oh that's going to be so
difficult there's no way that i could look people in the eyes like also i kind of think there's
something about trust and delivering the news where if you can lie that convincingly then i don't know
i just think it's not a good thing so i thought i can't do that but i didn't really get how much fun
it was to be a traitor because when you watch the civilian one it just looks horrific being a
because they're all crying and I guess there's so much money at State Life Trade Your Money.
And, you know, you're murdering people that you know if they won the money,
it would change their lives and the lives of them.
Yeah, I thought there's no way I can get involved any of that.
But what is being delicious, I think, about the Celebrity Traitors series
is there's just been a little bit more mischief.
It was very feel good.
It was very feel good.
Yeah.
It was beautiful feel good TV.
and I'd say the two moments where that really came across
are Alan crying at the end
which is just unbelievable
and I've got to admit I went
I went and the studio
of course I cried because I'm a living human being
you're very in touch your emotions Josh
I love that if anything I'm too in touch Rob
if we need to we need a bit of space
and and also
So Kate, I thought it was you talking about how you'd had such a tough time and this had done
so much for you.
And it felt like such a, because obviously everyone knows what you've been through.
And it felt like no one expected that from the traitors.
And I imagine you didn't expect that from the traitors.
No, I didn't at all.
I didn't at all.
And I think there was just something.
Once I sort of mentally thought, okay, there's no contact.
I can't do anything.
and the auntie die was established.
And is there a rule?
Is there like, do they say if X happens,
if your daughter says, I have to speak to?
What's the kind of, what's the rule?
There is.
They would let it to.
And we did have that arrangement
because she said, look, I just have to know
I can get hold of you understandably.
And I said, yes.
So there is.
So they can call, they have contact numbers.
They have their contact numbers
and they are contact numbers
with kind of a welfare producer.
And they can get hold of you if there was, I mean, obviously, if there was some, you know,
because other people in the cast were having, everybody's got stuff going on in their lives,
haven't they?
Well, we've all seen the Angie Bowie on Big Brother clip.
That's the absolute class.
Right.
So, you know, if you have to get through, you have to get through.
Yeah.
So, yeah.
So that was a kind of reassuring thing.
Did you feel like you had a bit, you know, when you're in the traitors,
because you didn't have, you have so much responsibility, you know, you've got your two children,
What you've went through, but I'm still going through, is in everyone's mind and knows about it.
But you, in that room, all you had to do was be a faithful or a traitor and play a game.
And did you feel like a freedom of that, that, you know, because you're so famous and people will come to you in the street, I imagine daily to remind you about stuff that's gone on, you know, that he's not in your control and can blindside you.
It was that sense of freedom for you in there then.
Yeah, there was a huge to bring up.
And also just the joy of play.
I mean, it sounds a little bit heavy, I suppose.
but when you've sort of lived with real life, life and death,
you know, on a daily basis.
You know what I mean?
And there was like years of phone calls from doctors saying
may not make it through the night and all of that.
And I don't want to sound heavy.
You know, that is real life, life or death.
So therefore, it does help you to put into context of it.
Also, you know, it's very intense in there.
And I think in a way that helped me
because obviously, A, everybody was suspicious of me
and attacked me from day one.
but also everybody just laughed at me for being ridiculous
and there's sort of two ways to go with that
but you either kind of get a bit flustered some people got flustered about things
but I kind of just thought well actually do you know what
it's really lovely to laugh at myself
and laugh at my genuine ridiculousness
because you know for a long time it's been a feeling of sort of holding the world up
you know, with a tight grip.
So to be able to go, you are, you know,
when Alan sort of says,
do you think that top needs any more bows,
to be able to laugh and say,
yeah, I think it could do with more.
It's such a ridiculous thing
and then we're all laughing.
It was just a lovely world on nonsense.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, totally.
Yeah, which was great.
And having the chance to play.
And also, what a group of people to be in with them.
Every single one of them
are just sort of such big person.
I've done so much in their lives in all sorts of different areas.
So I found the whole thing just a rollercoaster of a fascinating learning about them
and seeing the way people deal with things in their lives
because you get very insular when you're caring.
You're just kind of obviously looking inward,
have done those plug desks, have we done the medication,
what's the temperature like today?
You're looking really into the minutiae inwards.
And suddenly it was just like sort of looking out and going,
my gosh, you've done that.
that's and extraordinary and what was that like.
So, yeah, it was an incredible, it was an incredible thing,
albeit, you know, in a very silly game.
Yeah, who's the best friend you've made from it?
Oh, it's hard to say, really.
I mean, I do love them.
I think Jonathan and Alan, I love to bits.
I love them both to bits.
Yeah, lovely guys.
I love them all.
They were all brilliant in different ways.
And obviously, the ones that stayed in long,
you had more time with.
Love Tom Daly.
Tom Daly's knitted me a hat.
God bless him.
I might have it here.
Do you want me to go and get it?
Yeah, go and get it.
Hang on.
So this is,
this is knitted from the fair and...
I have it here.
You got it within one second.
I know it is...
Well, it was in my hand.
It was in my hunger.
It got to be fair.
Look.
Oh, look at that.
Flabbergasted.
He said flabbergasted.
He's looking that.
That's amazing.
It arrived.
Yesterday, and I haven't really stopped wearing it.
I'm so excited.
So, yeah, you know, Stephen Frye, I mean, honestly, Claire Boulding,
they're all amazing.
And also people like Ruth,
I can't imagine spending sort of focused time with Ruth.
When would that have ever happened, you know?
What did your kids make of it?
Did you watch it with them?
Wow.
Were you nervous about the edit?
And do you think it was a fair edit?
I think it was a fair edit.
It was a fair representation.
Unfortunately.
You came across brilliantly.
When you went out, I messaged you and I don't know you, but I was like, I'm going to message Kate Goway to say how brilliantly you came across.
Because I just thought there was so much goodness and so much positivity.
And I think the worst thing about people in the public eye is people that take themselves too seriously.
That's the worst crime.
And you were the opposite of that.
you were a laugh and laughing at yourself is such a positive thing.
So you came across brilliantly, I thought.
Well, that's very kind of you.
That's fine.
I was really chuffed to get your message actually.
I thought, oh, bless him.
He doesn't know me, but he's not, you know, he's not judging.
So this is a good start.
No, I was judging.
You're brilliant.
A positive judgment.
A good judgment.
A good judgment.
We love that.
Yeah, with the kids.
So obviously they're fans.
I mean, you know, there are many youngsters that aren't.
funds on it, aren't they? It's just
completely sucked in. So they're very excited.
So the first, so
I did watch it with them. So
I warned, they were like, oh, God,
this is going to be so embarrassing. So it was
aired just as
Darcy was three weeks into
a, to starting university. Can you
imagine you've barely
cut from the precious
week hangover. You've made
a few tentative friends.
You know, the whole
thing's all quite fragile. And it's
Has she gone away to uni to live with people?
Got away.
She's living away from home.
Oh, my word.
So she ran me up and said,
okay, mom, everybody's like,
works out you're in celebrity traders.
So I'm going to host a celebrity
trader party for the first
episode.
And invite loads of people to make some new friends.
So she,
so in their hall of residence.
So they had this big setup in whatever it is,
the common room, all they're waiting.
She phoned me at the end of that first episode,
absolutely horrified
or maybe it's
I cannot believe
you've done this to me
first of all
what's the deal
with the hats
I've been telling you
since primary school
they are preposterous
when you please listen to me
everybody's laughing at me
and people are taking it to me
and secondly
you're up against Nico
for banishment
she's like
he is the single most
popular person
in the whole band
or you know
they're all obsessive
I mean, you know, we all are.
He's brilliant, aren't me, isn't he?
But, and he said, and I don't know what to wish for
because I don't really want you to be out.
And then, but also if he's out, no one, none of my friends
are ever going to speak to me again.
I said, we're off against each other.
And then she said, for the whole of that week,
everybody saw we would kind of like do that slightly headcock thing
and go, hi, oh, nice to meet you.
Oh, your mum.
And that was a lot of that time.
So that first week was like,
quite torturous for her, but then
she owned it. But you knew
it was going to come good in your head.
I knew I was going to stay in,
but I also knew that meant Nicco was going
because obviously it was all filmed in a vase.
I can't remember that. So I
watched it obviously, but obviously
it all blurs into one of it. You were
the, there was a cliffhanger with you
and Nico. Because I just remember him
going. So the first murder we know somewhat
spectacularly was below.
My God. We all remember that.
Yeah. Or shot.
That was the bladder.
At least you took it well.
I think it was genuinely shocking.
We were so shocked.
And obviously, now we know it was Alan.
Oh, my God.
I mean, the genius of that.
The producers must have just thought,
we cannot believe this is happening.
Obviously, they have no control.
And then the second episode on the Thursday
was Nicco and I up to be banished
was the cliffhanger.
We had to wait for weeks.
So, yeah, yeah.
But she had better than she got into it.
with the friends once their Nico and they loved it
yeah and they absolutely love them
and did she know that you weren't going to be banished
you can be honest with us Kay
no no no no well the two reasons
but she must have known that you'd been away for two weeks
wouldn't you just come home if you did
first of all what they told tell you
initially which is quite helpful actually
is that they're going to in fact
they do with the civilian traitors as they call it
they keep you there for the whole time so
yeah like I'm a celebrity
like I'm a celebrity exactly
so you don't although it was
I'm a sleb, you do know people have gone out,
don't you? Because it's sort of live and...
But it's the same thing where you have to stay.
You can't keep Jonathan Ross in Inverness for no money, not filming.
You need nine horses to hold him back.
It'd walk home.
But also, I think they realised, what would you do?
Would you literally carry on keeping them in a room?
Because Inverness is so tiny.
Yeah.
I mean, literally they weren't going to say who was in there.
And then they suddenly realized that Inverness Airport is really small.
So there was no way they were going to have all these random.
of people landing at Inverness Airport and people think,
why is Stephen Fry and Jonathan Ross
and all suddenly deciding to go to Inverness on the same day?
Yeah.
It's almost like a really positive Epstein's Island, isn't it, Inverness now,
where celebrities go to one small place for good?
Oh, my goodness, very laugh.
So, yes, I don't know what I'm saying now.
Yeah, so they told us all we'd have to stay there.
So that helped.
said we'd have to stay there for the whole time.
And in India, what they did is they brought people home overnight.
And then you had to sort of like not leave your house and not work or anything live.
I'd love to be and Josh trying to do that to Rose and Lou before you did it.
Yeah, can't do the school run actually because I've got to try to get a bit of a low profile.
You'd laugh at that, wouldn't you?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You'll have to do the bins again, Lou.
It's I get caught.
Yeah.
Would I want to get caught for my job?
Very serious job, actually.
That would go down really well.
Yeah.
Yeah, and also she was away.
And they didn't want to know.
Neither of them wanted to know.
And also, I don't think anybody, I don't think they quite,
you know, they're really healthily, I like to look at it.
Actually, it's mainly just, they don't really care
until it becomes like something that all their friends are caring about.
They don't care what I do at all in.
Do you know what?
Something's been amazing for you and probably for the kids as well.
I don't want to speak out of term.
But obviously what you guys went through during like lockdown
and stuff like that was so in the public.
It almost grew out of an acorn into this big overwhelming giant tree of news and public interest.
But now, like, you know, for her, if she's walking down at uni, people go, your mum's celebrity.
Yeah.
That's the sort of immediate, you know.
And I think she, and actually, to be fair, that has been really positive because she said, oh, when I go to uni, I just don't want people to know about the past.
And I don't want people to, I don't want to be a charity case.
I want to try and not that, you know, people caring is not a lovely thing.
I think sure, of course.
It all comes from a good place.
I just want to do it.
But now, yeah, you're right.
It's more to do with, you know, your mum has humiliated you by being a bit of a ditsy idiot.
A lot of a ditsy idiot.
They're wearing stupid hats and see not be able to fight away out of a broom covered, you know, so constantly flavocasted.
So I guess it's a different kind of embarrassment.
It's a more normal teenager.
you want, isn't it? No one loves to hat their moms wear. Do you know, get any uni student
go, do you like your mum's clothes? No, I'm not going to go, great. So what was it like with
her going to uni? Because that is a big, big deal for your kid to go to uni, empty nest syndrome
and all that kind of thing. I think it was incredibly emotional because, first of all, we didn't
think she was going to, well, we assumed she was going to fail away levels, basically.
and she didn't do brilliantly,
but she did a lot better
than anybody including the school thought she would
because, you know, it'll all come
with Derek passing away
and then the fallout and everything
and she'd missed a lot of, you know,
lower six, she'd missed a huge amount of school and stuff.
So we didn't expect it.
And then it sort of all came good.
So there was a sort of big relief on the,
it's quite a close window, isn't it,
between results and going?
So there's a big relief from the,
results and then heading off to
uni and then
it was really emotional
I felt very emotional I didn't want her to feel
but I think we both felt that dad
wasn't there basically
it was a very conscious feeling
you know when you're watching the parents
or carrying the boxes in
not every parent has got both parents there
but it does feel like it to you
and you know
we're just struggling with the cases
and everything and you just think, oh, and also thinking he would be so proud
and then actually leaving her, she was fine, I did have a really good week
because I thought we should be going, the two of us, Derek and I should be going now
to have a bite to eat and to drive home, slight, both emotional, but also having a little
pat on the back thinking, okay, we got them, we got her there, you know, we got a through.
And instead, you think, oh, I just felt sort of crossed.
that he wasn't there, but you kind of both hope that both Darcy
and I think he's sort of watching over her.
In fact, Darcy does this a lot.
Anything good that happened, she said that was Dad.
And this can range from suddenly finding she's got a festival ticket
when they were all sold out.
She'd go, that's Dad, that's Dad.
And they're like, you know, you could just imagine him
if you had the power to control the world from Heaven,
sorting out a Reading ticket.
They don't be.
They're not being.
priority but you're probably thinking like she i popped into capital and asked jordan north and shan
wellby for a spare ticket but yeah fine if you want to give him the credit yeah exactly just lent on
them from from above so yeah so anything good that happens she goes that's dad honestly or she's
panicking to try and submit something and the computer's not working and then she wanted and then
it worked and i submitted it so that was dad helping me and i like that i think that's a nice way of her
feeling like he's still taking care, you know, which is, it is a nice thing.
So it's sort of there, and I think she feels that he would be, you know, very proud.
Oh, it's been quite a year for you then, isn't it?
I know.
With the uni and in celebrity, traitors.
I know, I know.
I know.
And then Sun did his GCSEs in the summer as well.
And that was pretty traumatic.
but he's sort of got himself into a place to do what he wants to do,
which is sort of music and acting.
So you sort of feel like you think, okay, all right,
we're limping through gradually.
But, you know, it's like, I'm sure it's like it with you too.
It's sort of like you don't, you sort of have to kind of celebrate the wins
because you know you'll turn around next time and there's,
you'll turn around for a second.
and it's like, oh, okay, you've fallen apart.
That's what I feel.
I say, if the two of you could just try and do some kind of relay,
that would be really have fun.
And I'm like, Darcy is doing fine.
So I'm like, Darcy, if you could stay doing fine
until we've got Billy a little bit more sorted,
that would be helpful.
And then Billy, you can be fine and then Darcy can fall apart.
But that's juggling, isn't it?
It's such a difficult time anyway.
You've got a 16-year-old and 19-year-old on top of everything.
And also, you know, on your own doing it,
It's sort of like it's a lot of pressure.
But yeah, it sounds like you're absolutely flying, though.
Well, I don't know about that.
I don't like being a single parent, if I'm being honest.
I think I just, I'll tell you what I miss most about being a single parent.
It's that, you know, even if your partner is driving you absolutely crackers,
which happened a lot with Derek and I, probably equally,
but I feel like he drove me mad a lot.
But even if they're driving you mad, it's just like you both have that shared love.
of the child where they do something stupid but you both find it cute
or they do something infuriating but there's an underlying acknowledgement of forgiveness
I don't know it's hard to explain that you only get that from those two and feel like it
so yeah I've always said oh my god I so admire single parents I could never be one and I think
curse you curse you world but yeah you've just got to get on with it haven't you
And so you, now, it's so difficult because, like, those A levels and GCSEs, it must seem so unimportant.
Do you know what I mean with what you've been through?
I know what you mean, but you also, I know what you mean.
You sort of think, oh, gosh, you know, if we're all just sane and, you know, if they're polite.
But you know that actually it's not about, I mean, crakey, nobody's hoping for A-style.
and nines and whatever you just want them to have access to choice don't you so you want them to have
access to choice and you want them to feel good about themselves even though we all know actually
that things come along in life and it's never it's never really actually to do with passing a
exam is it is to do when you're actually i just say i don't really mind as long as you're enthusiastic and
you get involved just get involved don't yeah don't
fail and don't know about because you just couldn't be bothered you know just get involved and then
if you keep trying stuff eventually you find something that excites you don't you you know definitely
there's so much pressure on kids I'm in my daughters she's only like severed and they were like
oh you need to your handwriting your Bs and Ds the lines in them aren't straight enough and they're
going too far to the left and the teacher's only like giving a slight bit of feedback but then
my daughter's like oh god she's saying that it's not right and I'm not doing it well and I went
I went, can I tell her, I don't care
what you do, your bees and it, it don't really matter.
She went, yeah, but it matters to the teacher.
I'm like, yeah, but let her care.
Do you care?
You don't have to, it doesn't, you know,
you can allow people and slightly disappoint them,
you know, yeah, fair enough.
She'd rather you did that.
It hurts your hand when you do it.
Maybe you just don't do that.
Maybe you find your own way.
Yeah.
I know that's good, but then isn't it great
that she wants to please the teacher?
It would be much worse if you were dragging her into school
or you want.
Of course. It's that balance, you don't want to be a full.
It's sort of like, people-pleaser and too pleasing, you know,
because then it's like, she's beating herself up too much.
Otherwise, you end up like me.
You end up like me, Rob.
If you get too much on people-pleaser.
Are your D's and B's perfectly strange?
My hand-writings are fucking shambles, actually.
Is it?
Yeah, but that's just for my...
It's deteriorated over the years.
You don't write anymore, do we?
That's another thing with kids I find.
When they're treated exam, they get really bad hand-date
because they just don't write.
All the homework's online, you know, it's, it's, yeah, physically putting pens of paper happens so rarely.
Well, that's, I find it, I struggle with their homework and stuff like that.
Because as you were saying, like, you know, you don't enjoy being a single parent.
I think when you've got your partner, you realize you're subconscious divvy up jobs that suits the other one more.
See, for me and Lou weren't together, and it was just me and my own.
Like, there's certain things that I'd find it easier and excel at as a parent.
But then, like, I literally, I can't do their homework.
Like I just cannot do it.
So Lou takes a lead on that.
So if I was left to do that, I'd just be so at sea.
And then not only is your workload double,
you're having to do stuff that you feel insecure and vulnerable
and not very confident in.
And then that affects your self-confidence
because you feel like you're not being a good parent
because normally you'd hand that over
to the one that finds that easier.
Yeah, I know exactly right.
You can be good cop, bad cop, can't you when you have a pair again?
You can flip who's the good cop and the bad cop at each time.
Whereas when you're on your own,
being a bit schizophrenic. Also, especially with my son, it's because he was the younger one,
you know, certainly when Derek was first sick and was in the coma for that year, I just kind of
thought, let's just be happy and just keep ourselves happy. So I was quite bad in the sense
that I was definitely sort of saying, oh, we can't get online for that. Just don't worry about
that learning. Let's put on, let's watch, let's rewatch Nativity for the 140s. Which is one of his favorite movies.
You know, and I didn't care about it.
And then I suddenly thought, oh, my God, we're now at GCSEs.
So he found it really hard because I was going, come on, Bill.
You've got to, you've got to focus.
You've got to do this.
And he's looking at me as to say, why have you become a monster?
In fact, he said that.
Yeah, you know, what happened to come on?
There's some chocolate.
And let's watch a movie.
Mommy, I don't like this, mommy now.
So, yeah, I think it is, isn't it?
You sort of divvy it up and you let someone be the bad guy.
How do you deal with, because obviously,
obviously you're supporting them.
Do you feel you have to remain really strong
in their company, or
do you feel like, like, how do you play
that? Well, I'm not sure
that I've got a particularly good recipe for
it. Definitely, I feel
like I had to
stay very strong,
so they didn't feel like the
world was crumbling. I was very conscious
of that, and I know that Derek was
very conscious of that. In fact,
you know, when he first went into the ambulance, he said,
you know, go inside
take care of them. And when he came home, he was like, you know, if Bill was calling for something
or Darcy was coming in. And then, and I would say, Darcy, come in here. I'm just dealing with
dad. And she would come in and there would be a, and I say, well, talk about it in front of her.
She said, such and such. And I want to go out to it. And mum has said no. And try and
incorporate Derek into that, that feeling of stability. Because what you don't want to be is a
puddle on the floor. Because I just think, one of the things I think, my mom and dad,
I never heard them row, actually, I'm sure they had some absolute barnies,
but I never heard them row.
And I always had this feeling, you know, like when we went camping in Pembrokeshire for our annual holiday.
I didn't really know what was going to be involved.
I certainly, you know, when they were struggling to put the tent up,
I didn't realize, God, that must have been quite stressful for them.
Because to me, it was just, this is what we did on a holiday, it was all going to be okay.
You know, the tent would go up.
We'd go inside.
there would be some food or the private stove that we prepared.
I never had a feeling that things weren't going to be okay,
which I think is a real gift because I don't think,
I think a lot of children don't have that and definitely my children don't have that.
I really am sad about that because, you know,
I can't say with confidence, oh, don't worry about it, it'll be fine
because they go, no, no, sometimes it's not fine.
Sometimes whatever you do, and however hard you try and however hard, you know, dad worked,
it wasn't fine.
And I think that shifted something in them
where I feel like I have to be really secure
and rock solid.
So for instance, promises,
I'm just really clear.
They'll say,
do you think we can do this mom?
I'd really want to go to this movie.
I was like, I'm not sure.
So I'm not going to promise it
until I've got the tickets.
I feel like a calm waiver on promises.
You know what I mean?
Yes, absolutely.
Before I'd have been like,
yeah, we can go to that.
I don't know when we're going to do that.
It would be what was happening in my head.
But now I'm just like, no, don't say unless you can deliver
because I think they need to rebuild a sense of trust.
Of course, yeah.
Totally.
That's a very long answer.
No, it's true.
Totally.
Yeah, yeah.
Enlighting.
Especially because, you know, now they're becoming young men and women.
They're moving into that different way where they can go,
have front conversations with you, you know.
Because even with my case now, you'll say stuff like,
yeah, we'll do that next week or whatever.
and then you think, oh, they're three or four, they'll forget.
They'll forget.
And it comes around.
And even at 8 and 10, they're like, no, Dad, you said that last week.
You've done this twice now.
And they'll present me like a solicitor times I've done it wrong.
And these are very frivolous things, I promised them.
Whereas, like, you know, the things that you've been through have been like much bigger, more brutal things they've experienced.
So you're right.
It is about feeling delivery, isn't it?
But I also try and say now, like we were, we went to Capital Jinglewell Ball,
brilliant, lovely thing because I work at Smooth that you get the chance to
go to that. And I was like, I'm not quite sure what we're going here on the tube. And Bill
was like, and I said, Bill, come off your phone please. Help me concentrate because I'm not
sure I'm going. And I try, and he just said, oh, okay, rather than I think a year ago I'd have
been trying to desperately work it out so that I didn't show there was any wobble. But now I'm
a bit like, no, come on Bill, help me. Let's focus on this together. And they do respond to that.
Oh, that's brilliant. Yeah. Which I think is something you've, yeah, I have got to do.
because otherwise you're just constantly frazzled, don't you?
And you have to say, can't do that now, Bill.
You have to give me five minutes.
And he was like, I don't know your five minutes.
They always take hours.
I was like, yeah, fair enough.
That's a good point.
Could I ask you something about radio, Kate?
Yes.
And you've got another one about I'm a celebrity as well you wanted to ask.
Yeah, the one about the radio is you always get motorbikes between
good morning Britain and smooth.
Yes.
And the men on the motorbikes,
whenever I say who have you had on,
they've always had Kate Garroway on.
Oh God.
You love a motorbike, don't you?
I live on the back of those motorbikes.
They've become a second home.
The first time I used it
was when Amy Winehouse passed away
and her dad,
that's how long ago it was,
her dad would happen to be in New York or something
and they said,
oh, we want to go out and do an interview.
And so I flew out in a like a 36-hour
sprint, interviewed him, fed the interview back, and then got the flight back without having
slept. And I arrived with huge ankles because I hadn't actually gone flat for 36 hours.
But also, I got off the plane thinking, oh, I'm going to go home to bed now. And I was met by a guy
called Kerry who runs limo bike. Oh, yeah. I know Carrie. Lovely Kerry. Saying hi,
I'm here to meet you. And I said, oh, okay, that's lovely. I think it, cranky, I mean, there's a lot of leather
for an Addison Lee
but anyway
we went outside and there was his bike
and I was like, what are you talking about?
They said, oh, they've decided
they want you to go into the studio
to talk around the interview so that you can give it
some life.
I was like, oh my God, I don't like motorbikes,
I can't go on it.
And it was really raining as well.
And he said, but you know that weird adrenaline thing
when somebody in work says you've got to do something?
You just can't think of how you could say,
So I just always say, yes, got me into a lot of trouble.
Anyway, got on the back of it, pulled out of Heathrow,
and I said, you're going to have to go really slowly.
And he said, look, we're on intercom.
Just tell me if there's a problem.
So we pulled out, and I was like, too fast, too fast.
I was like, okay, we're going nine miles now.
And I was like, okay.
So we then headed on to the motorway, and it was horrific.
There were lorries going past as rainy.
All you can see is your feet below your, you know, down
and the road whizzing past, and I just screamed, I screamed solidly for 21 minutes.
And then after that 21 minutes, he said, I'm just going to turn the intercom off for a while.
I think his ears were bleeding, right?
And then we came into London and the sun came up.
And I thought, this is actually quite nice.
You're just gliding through the traffic.
And then I've been on them ever since.
Yeah, I've been on them ever since.
I mean, it's a weird thing.
It's like this weird kind of pool pick confession.
I know everything about all of them.
I know when one's guinea pig is sick or, you know, the whole thing.
It's easy to talk to someone.
You can't see them.
Exactly.
But you're connected because you're on the bike.
It's a weird.
It took their helmet off.
I'd walk past them in the street probably.
Yeah, it's hard to recognise.
I've done it a couple of times.
Yeah, I know.
Although what I used to do is when their kids were little,
I'd walk them to school for the days that I wasn't doing GMB
and get one from home.
And so the guy would come to the school gate.
And I would get on the back of a motorbike and whizz off.
And it just made me seem so exciting.
And then Derek would go in and do like, you know,
cutting up paper day or something.
And they'd say, oh, we see your wife.
But do you ride a motorbike?
And they go, no.
And they'd all go, oh, okay.
She's been in a fair.
We're five different motorbike men.
Derek wasn't around.
I was disappointed.
very off for an illicit affair with a bike.
Josh, what should you have a question for Kate?
I've always wondered this, Kate.
Sorry, yes.
No, no, no, no, it's fun.
So I wonder whether you won't even remember this, right?
But on the first episode of I'm a celebrity, when you did I'm a celebrity.
Right, yeah.
And me and some friends saw this, and we've quoted it ever since, right?
So do you remember your, I can't remember where you are, but that Andrew Max
it arrives on a speedboat.
Yes.
Yes.
I remember.
Do you remember what you said?
Do you remember what you said?
No.
Right.
So he is about 50 yards in the distance, right?
And there's a small man, isn't it?
He's a big guy.
And you, it cuts to you, looking out into the distance, and you say,
oh, it's the Irish comedian Andrew Maxwell.
And it felt like to us, the producer.
had said, quite a lot of people might not know who Andrew Maxwell is.
Kate, could you just say, it's the Irish comedian Andrew Maxwell,
so that it's clear for the rest of the country?
Can you remember this?
I can definitely remember saying it.
I'm not sure I'm allowed to say whether it was prompting.
Does it sound like the sort of thing people say in normal life?
Or does it sound like the sort of thing a producer might have suggested?
You'll leave that with you.
Yeah, well, yeah, fair enough that you can't comment either way.
He's a very funny guy, isn't he, Andrew?
He's brilliant, Andrew.
Thank you, Kate.
Genuinely, you are incredible.
What you've done, you're still, like,
and the way you've kind of came through what you've done,
and the way you talk about it is so powerful for people.
And also, when you're on celebrity traitors,
you just came across as a breath of fresh air.
It was brilliant.
That's you.
Kate, we always ask everyone,
the final question about their partner as a parent.
What is it Derek did that used to, you know, make you feel in awe of him as a parent?
And then what was the thing that used to day-to-day frustrate you and annoy you?
Minor quibble.
Your minor quibble.
Your minor quibble.
Well, the minor quibble is really easy.
It's the classic one.
Is it parenting or is it just, you know, living with somebody?
So there's two things, really.
Oh, I'm on a roll now.
one was the classic bringing a plate
to the vicinity of the dishwasher
as though just being in the vicinity
meant there was going to be some kind of weird quantum force
that got it in.
Yeah, that would pull it in.
So that was one.
The other one was just the classic thing
of allowing the kids to go completely crazy.
So you'd come in.
from work
they'd be there really happy
sometimes when Darcy was little
they'd both just be in their pants
they would just be in their pants
because everything had got so messy
there would be a part of clothes by the washing machine
everybody'd be really happy
and he would be like
oh we've had such a great day
right I'm going to bed now
and you'd be like right okay
I'm glad you're really happy
but I'm now going to pick up the carnage
so there was that feeling
of a very much fun dad, and you had to be the kind of like practical mum,
the thing I was, I think, probably most in awe of was the complete ability to be present
that he always had with the kids. It was just extraordinary. You could be anywhere. You could
be at checkers. You could be in any kind of function or a big business meeting. And he would
just somehow always managed to be present, whether it be he'd had to take them into his office
when he had his business. He just managed to make it an exciting thing for them. And holidays,
he was incredible. I was funny enough, I was turning some stuff out to get the decorations
up the other day. And he used to print out, you know, Billy and Darcy's holiday adventure,
wherever we were going. One time we went to three nights to a Premier Inn. It was brilliant,
actually, in Guildford, because there was a soft plane nearby they wanted to go to.
it's still one of their most favorite long weekends.
And you just put loads of little things in of what we were going to do.
So I think it's that ability to be present
even when there's chaos going on that I always really admired.
Oh, OK, this has been incredible.
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
Yeah, it's been brilliant.
You've been a brilliant guest.
Thank you so much for doing it.
No problem at all.
No problem at all.
It's been lovely to chat soon.
Kay Garraway, what a great guest.
Love her.
That was great fun, that, on it?
She's brilliant.
Brilliant.
She's amazing, you know.
Like, it must be so overwhelming for everyone to know what's happened to you and your family in quite extreme detail.
And then, you know, caroling your life and people coming up to and stuff like that.
But she deals with it really well, I think, and she speaks so well.
Yeah.
It must be so hard.
It's hard going through that anyway, but not every single person on the street knowing.
You know what I mean?
Totally.
Totally.
Totally.
She's doing a brilliant job there.
And I loved her in traitors because I just thought she was.
fun. It's a TV show. Have a laugh.
Right, Josh, I'll see you next time. See you next time.
