Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S11 EP39: Kate Garraway

Episode Date: December 26, 2025

Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the brilliant broadcaster and journalist - Kate Garraway MBE. Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywh...ere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: Hello@lockdownparenting.co.uk Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: hello@keepitlightmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Quick trigger warning for this episode, we do discuss Father Christmas and elves, if you're listening with children. And also we do discuss the passing of Kate's late husband, Derek, and the impact that's had on them as a family. Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Widdickham. Welcome to Parents in Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you, feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting, Each week, we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping.
Starting point is 00:00:35 And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener, with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting, woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times where none of us know what we're doing. Hello, you're listening to Parents in Hell with... Robin. Can you say Rob Beckett? Rob Beckett. And can you say Josh Whitaker? He's been again Good job
Starting point is 00:01:00 Why do you take your horn out He's called her on it A couple of Aussies He's been bootlegging He's been bootlegging Hi Rob, Josh and Michael Hello from Newcastle Australia
Starting point is 00:01:12 Yeah but subtle level accent there right Robin In 27 months having a go at saying your names He was so impressed with himself That insisted on more tries This was the first of seven takes So nearly three
Starting point is 00:01:25 I've been listening since pregnancy It got me through the early days when everything truly feels hectic and now the general struggles of parenthood. Thanks for the last day section relatable from Casey. Thanks, Casey from Newcastle Australia. Right, I bet it's well up there, but she's going for a fucking lovely walk in the sun. I can't be bothered of this weather.
Starting point is 00:01:45 I love it. I love it. Dark at four. My gig's at eight. Fuck, it feels like I'm doing a gig at 3 a.m. It's fucking... Because he got booked 10 years ago before everyone started doing them fucking earlier. and then the next tour is going to be fucking matinee.
Starting point is 00:01:59 But you love it. Do you like this? Wait this time of year and the cold and the dark. It's miserable. Yeah. It's the best. Rob, you don't like this time of year. I love Christmas.
Starting point is 00:02:09 I love Christmas. I love being a bit of music. Would you like a sunny Christmas? No. No. Do you know what? Like, I don't like it being dark and I don't like it when it's wet. I like the cold and wrapping up.
Starting point is 00:02:20 The wet does my head in. And it's been so wet the last sort of three or four weeks in it. It's constantly pissing down. And, but the Christmas spirit. The only reason Christmas exists is because someone has to invent something because it's so fucking miserable between December to February. So that's have something in the middle to liven it up. Because January to Feb, that is danger zones for miserableness.
Starting point is 00:02:41 Yeah, I enjoy December. But January, you've got to go in at full pout. Oh, my God. January's tough. You've got to have stuff to do in January. January lockdown was the worst January on record. Remember that? The lockdown January.
Starting point is 00:02:53 Yeah, yeah. Because we thought it was all right. And then it all went potty again. before Christmas. But that's why we're here to bring joy, bring a little bit of just real life chat to get everyone through those dark winter months. Right, guys, we're in it together. Right, guys? Imagine you're a local radio, DJ. How would you approach it, Rob? Hello, and welcome to the show. Got Josh Whitacum here. We've got some great songs for you, great chat, great guests, and most importantly, each other. Do you see where I stumbled,
Starting point is 00:03:20 right, to pretend to be sincere? Yeah. I could, that's what I, have you? Not really. I'm, I'm, I'm a seasonal DJ. Right. I'm dictated by the mood. I couldn't do Radio 2 breakfast where you've got to be happy all year because it's not how I feel, but most of the time I'm jolly.
Starting point is 00:03:36 The thing that I would struggle with if you were on like one of those daily shows is how do you keep it feeling exciting? I'd have to be in a gang on my own. Yeah, yeah. I think I could get away that if I was with three mates doing a breakfast show, I'd have to have someone on the show
Starting point is 00:03:57 that's more miserable than me that I could go, well, at least I'm happier than that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's not many gangs anymore, are there? It's gone out of fashion on the radio. There's gangs at Capitol, and I think they're brilliant. Capital, obviously, is a gang.
Starting point is 00:04:12 That's a breakfast one. And then Magic's more, is Gokwan and Harris. Oh, that's two. But it's not a gang, yeah. I think I need more than two. I need a gang to have anyone, or is he flying solo?
Starting point is 00:04:23 No, but then the thing is, if you are a gang, you're not going to be paid as much because there's three of you doing one person's job. That's why sometimes they lean on people, you know, on the news or in traffic bringing them in, because you've got people, but you're not having to pay them, or they get the producer to start chatting because they're not having to pay them on air fee.
Starting point is 00:04:39 It's a weird thing in radio. There's like a career in not being the radio host, but being an excellent foil. Almost like an attack midfielder. You're just constantly playing the ball through. You get a couple of goals yourself, most shows. But you're basically feeding the goal. to score. Have we got someone on from the radio? Who have we got today, Michael?
Starting point is 00:04:58 Kate Garraway, who is a radio host, obviously. I'll tell you what's what we're doing on this. Let's talk about Kate Garraway. So A, we'll talk to her about traitors, because I'm very excited about traitors. I actually DMed Kate Garoway to say that I thought she was brilliant on traitors because I thought she came across as not taking herself too seriously and a real laugh and not competitive. Yeah, she just was having, and I felt like she was just having a lovely time with some really great people and then when they were going who do you think it is Kate
Starting point is 00:05:26 she was a bit like oh I don't know I just quite enjoying hanging out yeah exactly I thought I liked that attitude the other thing about Kate Garroway and we've discussed the motorbikes we
Starting point is 00:05:36 occasionally have to get if we go between gigs before yes Garaway is a big use of those motorb oh she loves to ride she goes from GMB good morning Britain good morning Britain
Starting point is 00:05:48 to her show on Smooth which starts at 10 a.m. I think Oh, yeah, come on. So I want to ask Kate Garrae is from radio, Rob. So you want to ask Kate Garroway what it was like doing the traitors and if she likes to get in the motorbikes? Yeah, that's all I want to ask Kate Garroway. Should we ask her about parenting as well?
Starting point is 00:06:06 Yeah, probably it won't be worth people. Oh, there's one other thing I want to ask Kate Garroway. Go on. A clip I've always been obsessed with of Kate Garroway. Okay. It's starting to feel like, you know, there's sort of autograph hunters that wait outside smooth? You're starting to sound like, what would you ask Kate Garrow if you got a chance?
Starting point is 00:06:21 Kate, what's it like getting the motorbike? Mike, what was celebrity traitors like? And one last thing, this clip-hutty interview, I've got a question about this. So, do you remember when Kate Garroway did I'm a celebrity get me out of here? And I remember she'd being on it, but not any particular clip. She was on it with Andrew Maxwell. Yes, comedian, Andrew Maxwell? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:39 So he arrived on a speedboat. Yeah? Yeah. And he was in the distance. Kate Garrowy was already there. And there was an incredible moment where she looked at the speedboat and the distance and she said oh it's the Irish comedian Andrew Maxwell oh yes yes please yeah so are you suggesting that she may not have known who it is and then asked who it was and then the production went
Starting point is 00:07:07 as an Irish comedian called Andrew Maxwell I'm suggesting the production have said I think what's happened is the production we need to be clear who Andrew Maxwell is to the audience Kate could you just say yeah because I'd say Andrew Maxwell like he's brilliant one of the best comedians Yeah, yeah, of course. But he hasn't done load and loads of telly. He's done a bit of, he does the X on the Beach voiceover, and he's been on some stand-up shows. But I don't think she's in, he's in Kate Garaway's orbit.
Starting point is 00:07:31 No, so I want to ask Kay Garaway if she did recognize Andrew Maxwell on speedboat from 50 yards away. Or whether. She was asked by the Dungeon to maybe, and she slipped it in verbatim rather than, oh, it's Andrew Maxwell. Oh, he's a comedian, Irish guy. Yeah. Which is the way I would, you know, slip it in all one word. but she's gone, it's the Irish comedian, Andrew.
Starting point is 00:07:53 But she's done it like a TV host, hasn't she? Yeah, of course, yeah. But she's welcoming him on Zoom during lockdown of Togne. Yeah, exactly. Andrew Maxwell. Yeah, so I'll be all scared about that as well. So that's something to look forward to. Perfect.
Starting point is 00:08:06 Well, I'll tell you, well, I imagine she's not been asked. I imagine she's been asked about celebrity traitors. Yeah. But maybe not the other two. So it'd be good to cover new ground. Yeah, exactly. First question, don't worry about the kids. I'm a celebrity.
Starting point is 00:08:18 I'm a celebrity. I'm a celebrity. I'll tell you go. Well, just let's get her on and bloody find out. Yeah. Okay, here she is. Kate Garraway, hello. Hello.
Starting point is 00:08:29 Hello. How nice to be here. We're very excited to have you on, Kate. We've been trying to get you for a little while, but you're very busy. You're a very busy woman. You're very, do you know what you are, Kate? You're verging on national treasure these days, aren't you?
Starting point is 00:08:41 No, I'm not verging on a national treasure. Oh, you're there? I have a slightly crumbling institution, to be fair. but I find myself strangely drawn. You know, you get things bombarding you. My algorithm is really disturbing online. So I'm increasingly getting things about preserving old buildings, which is a sign of age.
Starting point is 00:09:04 And I find myself going between that and the TikTok shop for aging creams. And the two things are merging into one. So, yeah. How's your experience on the TikTok shop, Kate? Because I'm having a terrible time with some incredible tat that if I saw in real life, I'd never buy, but I'm being seduced by the instant satisfaction of ordering it. It's really, so I'm really new to TikTok.
Starting point is 00:09:27 I decided to launch myself on an unsuspecting TikTok public. Just for celebrity traitors, I thought, come on, if you're going to do it, you might as well do it now because there's a whole world that may be more interested vaguely because I'm on celebrity traitors. Of course it's completely addictive. It's what everyone says. The experience of TikTok shopping,
Starting point is 00:09:48 I think it's a little bit like a pharmacy when you're on holiday. You know, when you went with your parents to like Devon or somewhere? And there was very little in the village. It was gorgeous, actually. It's sort of a place I'd love to go to now. But when you're a kid, perhaps less so.
Starting point is 00:10:03 And you go into the pharmacy, you sort of find myself looking at hair clips and products that you would never normally look at. Just while your parents get some sight, like, I don't know, sun cream or something. And I find myself doing that too. I think, oh, actually I need. a projector.
Starting point is 00:10:23 Clearly TVs are out and projectors are in now. Yeah, I must look at this projector of it. Of course it's nonsense, isn't it? But it's very seductive. Obviously, we chat about parenting on this. You've got two teenage kids. What ages are they now? So 16 and 19. So the boy
Starting point is 00:10:40 the little bit the baby has turned 16 and the daughter is 19 at uni. Can we first, first, relate that to celebrity traitors we will right i know you're are you bored of talking about it yeah no god no i mean i'm the sort of person that in 10 years time is going to be going do know i was once on celebrity traitors costing people in the street what can i ask firstly that because that must be have been the big decision when you got offered it right because
Starting point is 00:11:14 obviously it's a big show you don't know how big it's going to be but you know that the normal one's but is it a situation where you're losing touch with your kids for two weeks? Yeah. So that was really difficult, actually. That was the only challenge because obviously, initially when I was offered it, I don't get offered a huge amount, let's say that first of all. You're here, Kate. You're a spank ball in Marse Singer.
Starting point is 00:11:41 You're right, actually. You're right. When it was secrets to traitors for ages, I came obviously first out in Masked Singer, a Spag Bowl. Brilliant fun, though. And then one, Celebrity Bake Off. So I said to everybody, it wasn't Celebrity Bake-Ov, it wasn't Masked Singer, I can say no more.
Starting point is 00:12:03 In other words, it wasn't first or last. So, yeah, no, it was very tricky with that because it's obviously been a grim old time. And I don't think you can really ever say or we're sorted now. But I definitely felt like it was a really, really tricky period. When I said yes, it was quite a sort of calm period and then things kicked off with my daughter and things are tricky with my son. But I do have an amazing
Starting point is 00:12:27 sister-in-law called Auntie Dye, who is phenomenal and also an obsessive fan of traitors. And she said, do you know what? And she hadn't been able to visit for a long time because she had her own health problem. She said, look, I was saying to myself, if I come next time, I'm going to come for a long period. And we also thought I'd be first out and murder because I wanted to be a faithful. Because it could be like two and a half weeks or two days, couldn't it?
Starting point is 00:12:56 Why did you want to, why did you want to be a faithful? Well, I now realise, of course, that was one of my first and one of many errors because in a way, I had this idea. I knew I couldn't look people in the eye and lie, because I've always been terrible at that. And I know Alan... Well, he didn't he?
Starting point is 00:13:16 didn't he actually did say you can lie the blessing but um but i just thought oh that's going to be so difficult there's no way that i could look people in the eyes like also i kind of think there's something about trust and delivering the news where if you can lie that convincingly then i don't know i just think it's not a good thing so i thought i can't do that but i didn't really get how much fun it was to be a traitor because when you watch the civilian one it just looks horrific being a because they're all crying and I guess there's so much money at State Life Trade Your Money. And, you know, you're murdering people that you know if they won the money, it would change their lives and the lives of them.
Starting point is 00:13:58 Yeah, I thought there's no way I can get involved any of that. But what is being delicious, I think, about the Celebrity Traitors series is there's just been a little bit more mischief. It was very feel good. It was very feel good. Yeah. It was beautiful feel good TV. and I'd say the two moments where that really came across
Starting point is 00:14:18 are Alan crying at the end which is just unbelievable and I've got to admit I went I went and the studio of course I cried because I'm a living human being you're very in touch your emotions Josh I love that if anything I'm too in touch Rob if we need to we need a bit of space
Starting point is 00:14:41 and and also So Kate, I thought it was you talking about how you'd had such a tough time and this had done so much for you. And it felt like such a, because obviously everyone knows what you've been through. And it felt like no one expected that from the traitors. And I imagine you didn't expect that from the traitors. No, I didn't at all. I didn't at all.
Starting point is 00:15:04 And I think there was just something. Once I sort of mentally thought, okay, there's no contact. I can't do anything. and the auntie die was established. And is there a rule? Is there like, do they say if X happens, if your daughter says, I have to speak to? What's the kind of, what's the rule?
Starting point is 00:15:27 There is. They would let it to. And we did have that arrangement because she said, look, I just have to know I can get hold of you understandably. And I said, yes. So there is. So they can call, they have contact numbers.
Starting point is 00:15:38 They have their contact numbers and they are contact numbers with kind of a welfare producer. And they can get hold of you if there was, I mean, obviously, if there was some, you know, because other people in the cast were having, everybody's got stuff going on in their lives, haven't they? Well, we've all seen the Angie Bowie on Big Brother clip. That's the absolute class.
Starting point is 00:15:58 Right. So, you know, if you have to get through, you have to get through. Yeah. So, yeah. So that was a kind of reassuring thing. Did you feel like you had a bit, you know, when you're in the traitors, because you didn't have, you have so much responsibility, you know, you've got your two children, What you've went through, but I'm still going through, is in everyone's mind and knows about it.
Starting point is 00:16:18 But you, in that room, all you had to do was be a faithful or a traitor and play a game. And did you feel like a freedom of that, that, you know, because you're so famous and people will come to you in the street, I imagine daily to remind you about stuff that's gone on, you know, that he's not in your control and can blindside you. It was that sense of freedom for you in there then. Yeah, there was a huge to bring up. And also just the joy of play. I mean, it sounds a little bit heavy, I suppose. but when you've sort of lived with real life, life and death, you know, on a daily basis.
Starting point is 00:16:48 You know what I mean? And there was like years of phone calls from doctors saying may not make it through the night and all of that. And I don't want to sound heavy. You know, that is real life, life or death. So therefore, it does help you to put into context of it. Also, you know, it's very intense in there. And I think in a way that helped me
Starting point is 00:17:07 because obviously, A, everybody was suspicious of me and attacked me from day one. but also everybody just laughed at me for being ridiculous and there's sort of two ways to go with that but you either kind of get a bit flustered some people got flustered about things but I kind of just thought well actually do you know what it's really lovely to laugh at myself and laugh at my genuine ridiculousness
Starting point is 00:17:33 because you know for a long time it's been a feeling of sort of holding the world up you know, with a tight grip. So to be able to go, you are, you know, when Alan sort of says, do you think that top needs any more bows, to be able to laugh and say, yeah, I think it could do with more. It's such a ridiculous thing
Starting point is 00:17:52 and then we're all laughing. It was just a lovely world on nonsense. You know what I mean? Yeah, totally. Yeah, which was great. And having the chance to play. And also, what a group of people to be in with them. Every single one of them
Starting point is 00:18:06 are just sort of such big person. I've done so much in their lives in all sorts of different areas. So I found the whole thing just a rollercoaster of a fascinating learning about them and seeing the way people deal with things in their lives because you get very insular when you're caring. You're just kind of obviously looking inward, have done those plug desks, have we done the medication, what's the temperature like today?
Starting point is 00:18:31 You're looking really into the minutiae inwards. And suddenly it was just like sort of looking out and going, my gosh, you've done that. that's and extraordinary and what was that like. So, yeah, it was an incredible, it was an incredible thing, albeit, you know, in a very silly game. Yeah, who's the best friend you've made from it? Oh, it's hard to say, really.
Starting point is 00:18:56 I mean, I do love them. I think Jonathan and Alan, I love to bits. I love them both to bits. Yeah, lovely guys. I love them all. They were all brilliant in different ways. And obviously, the ones that stayed in long, you had more time with.
Starting point is 00:19:10 Love Tom Daly. Tom Daly's knitted me a hat. God bless him. I might have it here. Do you want me to go and get it? Yeah, go and get it. Hang on. So this is,
Starting point is 00:19:20 this is knitted from the fair and... I have it here. You got it within one second. I know it is... Well, it was in my hand. It was in my hunger. It got to be fair. Look.
Starting point is 00:19:32 Oh, look at that. Flabbergasted. He said flabbergasted. He's looking that. That's amazing. It arrived. Yesterday, and I haven't really stopped wearing it. I'm so excited.
Starting point is 00:19:42 So, yeah, you know, Stephen Frye, I mean, honestly, Claire Boulding, they're all amazing. And also people like Ruth, I can't imagine spending sort of focused time with Ruth. When would that have ever happened, you know? What did your kids make of it? Did you watch it with them? Wow.
Starting point is 00:20:03 Were you nervous about the edit? And do you think it was a fair edit? I think it was a fair edit. It was a fair representation. Unfortunately. You came across brilliantly. When you went out, I messaged you and I don't know you, but I was like, I'm going to message Kate Goway to say how brilliantly you came across. Because I just thought there was so much goodness and so much positivity.
Starting point is 00:20:27 And I think the worst thing about people in the public eye is people that take themselves too seriously. That's the worst crime. And you were the opposite of that. you were a laugh and laughing at yourself is such a positive thing. So you came across brilliantly, I thought. Well, that's very kind of you. That's fine. I was really chuffed to get your message actually.
Starting point is 00:20:48 I thought, oh, bless him. He doesn't know me, but he's not, you know, he's not judging. So this is a good start. No, I was judging. You're brilliant. A positive judgment. A good judgment. A good judgment.
Starting point is 00:20:59 We love that. Yeah, with the kids. So obviously they're fans. I mean, you know, there are many youngsters that aren't. funds on it, aren't they? It's just completely sucked in. So they're very excited. So the first, so I did watch it with them. So
Starting point is 00:21:15 I warned, they were like, oh, God, this is going to be so embarrassing. So it was aired just as Darcy was three weeks into a, to starting university. Can you imagine you've barely cut from the precious week hangover. You've made
Starting point is 00:21:31 a few tentative friends. You know, the whole thing's all quite fragile. And it's Has she gone away to uni to live with people? Got away. She's living away from home. Oh, my word. So she ran me up and said,
Starting point is 00:21:43 okay, mom, everybody's like, works out you're in celebrity traders. So I'm going to host a celebrity trader party for the first episode. And invite loads of people to make some new friends. So she, so in their hall of residence.
Starting point is 00:21:58 So they had this big setup in whatever it is, the common room, all they're waiting. She phoned me at the end of that first episode, absolutely horrified or maybe it's I cannot believe you've done this to me first of all
Starting point is 00:22:13 what's the deal with the hats I've been telling you since primary school they are preposterous when you please listen to me everybody's laughing at me and people are taking it to me
Starting point is 00:22:24 and secondly you're up against Nico for banishment she's like he is the single most popular person in the whole band or you know
Starting point is 00:22:34 they're all obsessive I mean, you know, we all are. He's brilliant, aren't me, isn't he? But, and he said, and I don't know what to wish for because I don't really want you to be out. And then, but also if he's out, no one, none of my friends are ever going to speak to me again. I said, we're off against each other.
Starting point is 00:22:52 And then she said, for the whole of that week, everybody saw we would kind of like do that slightly headcock thing and go, hi, oh, nice to meet you. Oh, your mum. And that was a lot of that time. So that first week was like, quite torturous for her, but then she owned it. But you knew
Starting point is 00:23:10 it was going to come good in your head. I knew I was going to stay in, but I also knew that meant Nicco was going because obviously it was all filmed in a vase. I can't remember that. So I watched it obviously, but obviously it all blurs into one of it. You were the, there was a cliffhanger with you
Starting point is 00:23:26 and Nico. Because I just remember him going. So the first murder we know somewhat spectacularly was below. My God. We all remember that. Yeah. Or shot. That was the bladder. At least you took it well. I think it was genuinely shocking.
Starting point is 00:23:42 We were so shocked. And obviously, now we know it was Alan. Oh, my God. I mean, the genius of that. The producers must have just thought, we cannot believe this is happening. Obviously, they have no control. And then the second episode on the Thursday
Starting point is 00:23:58 was Nicco and I up to be banished was the cliffhanger. We had to wait for weeks. So, yeah, yeah. But she had better than she got into it. with the friends once their Nico and they loved it yeah and they absolutely love them and did she know that you weren't going to be banished
Starting point is 00:24:12 you can be honest with us Kay no no no no well the two reasons but she must have known that you'd been away for two weeks wouldn't you just come home if you did first of all what they told tell you initially which is quite helpful actually is that they're going to in fact they do with the civilian traitors as they call it
Starting point is 00:24:28 they keep you there for the whole time so yeah like I'm a celebrity like I'm a celebrity exactly so you don't although it was I'm a sleb, you do know people have gone out, don't you? Because it's sort of live and... But it's the same thing where you have to stay. You can't keep Jonathan Ross in Inverness for no money, not filming.
Starting point is 00:24:46 You need nine horses to hold him back. It'd walk home. But also, I think they realised, what would you do? Would you literally carry on keeping them in a room? Because Inverness is so tiny. Yeah. I mean, literally they weren't going to say who was in there. And then they suddenly realized that Inverness Airport is really small.
Starting point is 00:25:02 So there was no way they were going to have all these random. of people landing at Inverness Airport and people think, why is Stephen Fry and Jonathan Ross and all suddenly deciding to go to Inverness on the same day? Yeah. It's almost like a really positive Epstein's Island, isn't it, Inverness now, where celebrities go to one small place for good? Oh, my goodness, very laugh.
Starting point is 00:25:28 So, yes, I don't know what I'm saying now. Yeah, so they told us all we'd have to stay there. So that helped. said we'd have to stay there for the whole time. And in India, what they did is they brought people home overnight. And then you had to sort of like not leave your house and not work or anything live. I'd love to be and Josh trying to do that to Rose and Lou before you did it. Yeah, can't do the school run actually because I've got to try to get a bit of a low profile.
Starting point is 00:25:53 You'd laugh at that, wouldn't you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You'll have to do the bins again, Lou. It's I get caught. Yeah. Would I want to get caught for my job? Very serious job, actually. That would go down really well.
Starting point is 00:26:04 Yeah. Yeah, and also she was away. And they didn't want to know. Neither of them wanted to know. And also, I don't think anybody, I don't think they quite, you know, they're really healthily, I like to look at it. Actually, it's mainly just, they don't really care until it becomes like something that all their friends are caring about.
Starting point is 00:26:25 They don't care what I do at all in. Do you know what? Something's been amazing for you and probably for the kids as well. I don't want to speak out of term. But obviously what you guys went through during like lockdown and stuff like that was so in the public. It almost grew out of an acorn into this big overwhelming giant tree of news and public interest. But now, like, you know, for her, if she's walking down at uni, people go, your mum's celebrity.
Starting point is 00:26:47 Yeah. That's the sort of immediate, you know. And I think she, and actually, to be fair, that has been really positive because she said, oh, when I go to uni, I just don't want people to know about the past. And I don't want people to, I don't want to be a charity case. I want to try and not that, you know, people caring is not a lovely thing. I think sure, of course. It all comes from a good place. I just want to do it.
Starting point is 00:27:12 But now, yeah, you're right. It's more to do with, you know, your mum has humiliated you by being a bit of a ditsy idiot. A lot of a ditsy idiot. They're wearing stupid hats and see not be able to fight away out of a broom covered, you know, so constantly flavocasted. So I guess it's a different kind of embarrassment. It's a more normal teenager. you want, isn't it? No one loves to hat their moms wear. Do you know, get any uni student go, do you like your mum's clothes? No, I'm not going to go, great. So what was it like with
Starting point is 00:27:45 her going to uni? Because that is a big, big deal for your kid to go to uni, empty nest syndrome and all that kind of thing. I think it was incredibly emotional because, first of all, we didn't think she was going to, well, we assumed she was going to fail away levels, basically. and she didn't do brilliantly, but she did a lot better than anybody including the school thought she would because, you know, it'll all come with Derek passing away
Starting point is 00:28:15 and then the fallout and everything and she'd missed a lot of, you know, lower six, she'd missed a huge amount of school and stuff. So we didn't expect it. And then it sort of all came good. So there was a sort of big relief on the, it's quite a close window, isn't it, between results and going?
Starting point is 00:28:33 So there's a big relief from the, results and then heading off to uni and then it was really emotional I felt very emotional I didn't want her to feel but I think we both felt that dad wasn't there basically it was a very conscious feeling
Starting point is 00:28:50 you know when you're watching the parents or carrying the boxes in not every parent has got both parents there but it does feel like it to you and you know we're just struggling with the cases and everything and you just think, oh, and also thinking he would be so proud and then actually leaving her, she was fine, I did have a really good week
Starting point is 00:29:14 because I thought we should be going, the two of us, Derek and I should be going now to have a bite to eat and to drive home, slight, both emotional, but also having a little pat on the back thinking, okay, we got them, we got her there, you know, we got a through. And instead, you think, oh, I just felt sort of crossed. that he wasn't there, but you kind of both hope that both Darcy and I think he's sort of watching over her. In fact, Darcy does this a lot. Anything good that happened, she said that was Dad.
Starting point is 00:29:46 And this can range from suddenly finding she's got a festival ticket when they were all sold out. She'd go, that's Dad, that's Dad. And they're like, you know, you could just imagine him if you had the power to control the world from Heaven, sorting out a Reading ticket. They don't be. They're not being.
Starting point is 00:30:04 priority but you're probably thinking like she i popped into capital and asked jordan north and shan wellby for a spare ticket but yeah fine if you want to give him the credit yeah exactly just lent on them from from above so yeah so anything good that happens she goes that's dad honestly or she's panicking to try and submit something and the computer's not working and then she wanted and then it worked and i submitted it so that was dad helping me and i like that i think that's a nice way of her feeling like he's still taking care, you know, which is, it is a nice thing. So it's sort of there, and I think she feels that he would be, you know, very proud. Oh, it's been quite a year for you then, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:30:47 I know. With the uni and in celebrity, traitors. I know, I know. I know. And then Sun did his GCSEs in the summer as well. And that was pretty traumatic. but he's sort of got himself into a place to do what he wants to do, which is sort of music and acting.
Starting point is 00:31:08 So you sort of feel like you think, okay, all right, we're limping through gradually. But, you know, it's like, I'm sure it's like it with you too. It's sort of like you don't, you sort of have to kind of celebrate the wins because you know you'll turn around next time and there's, you'll turn around for a second. and it's like, oh, okay, you've fallen apart. That's what I feel.
Starting point is 00:31:32 I say, if the two of you could just try and do some kind of relay, that would be really have fun. And I'm like, Darcy is doing fine. So I'm like, Darcy, if you could stay doing fine until we've got Billy a little bit more sorted, that would be helpful. And then Billy, you can be fine and then Darcy can fall apart. But that's juggling, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:31:52 It's such a difficult time anyway. You've got a 16-year-old and 19-year-old on top of everything. And also, you know, on your own doing it, It's sort of like it's a lot of pressure. But yeah, it sounds like you're absolutely flying, though. Well, I don't know about that. I don't like being a single parent, if I'm being honest. I think I just, I'll tell you what I miss most about being a single parent.
Starting point is 00:32:12 It's that, you know, even if your partner is driving you absolutely crackers, which happened a lot with Derek and I, probably equally, but I feel like he drove me mad a lot. But even if they're driving you mad, it's just like you both have that shared love. of the child where they do something stupid but you both find it cute or they do something infuriating but there's an underlying acknowledgement of forgiveness I don't know it's hard to explain that you only get that from those two and feel like it so yeah I've always said oh my god I so admire single parents I could never be one and I think
Starting point is 00:32:50 curse you curse you world but yeah you've just got to get on with it haven't you And so you, now, it's so difficult because, like, those A levels and GCSEs, it must seem so unimportant. Do you know what I mean with what you've been through? I know what you mean, but you also, I know what you mean. You sort of think, oh, gosh, you know, if we're all just sane and, you know, if they're polite. But you know that actually it's not about, I mean, crakey, nobody's hoping for A-style. and nines and whatever you just want them to have access to choice don't you so you want them to have access to choice and you want them to feel good about themselves even though we all know actually
Starting point is 00:33:42 that things come along in life and it's never it's never really actually to do with passing a exam is it is to do when you're actually i just say i don't really mind as long as you're enthusiastic and you get involved just get involved don't yeah don't fail and don't know about because you just couldn't be bothered you know just get involved and then if you keep trying stuff eventually you find something that excites you don't you you know definitely there's so much pressure on kids I'm in my daughters she's only like severed and they were like oh you need to your handwriting your Bs and Ds the lines in them aren't straight enough and they're going too far to the left and the teacher's only like giving a slight bit of feedback but then
Starting point is 00:34:20 my daughter's like oh god she's saying that it's not right and I'm not doing it well and I went I went, can I tell her, I don't care what you do, your bees and it, it don't really matter. She went, yeah, but it matters to the teacher. I'm like, yeah, but let her care. Do you care? You don't have to, it doesn't, you know, you can allow people and slightly disappoint them,
Starting point is 00:34:36 you know, yeah, fair enough. She'd rather you did that. It hurts your hand when you do it. Maybe you just don't do that. Maybe you find your own way. Yeah. I know that's good, but then isn't it great that she wants to please the teacher?
Starting point is 00:34:47 It would be much worse if you were dragging her into school or you want. Of course. It's that balance, you don't want to be a full. It's sort of like, people-pleaser and too pleasing, you know, because then it's like, she's beating herself up too much. Otherwise, you end up like me. You end up like me, Rob. If you get too much on people-pleaser.
Starting point is 00:35:04 Are your D's and B's perfectly strange? My hand-writings are fucking shambles, actually. Is it? Yeah, but that's just for my... It's deteriorated over the years. You don't write anymore, do we? That's another thing with kids I find. When they're treated exam, they get really bad hand-date
Starting point is 00:35:21 because they just don't write. All the homework's online, you know, it's, it's, yeah, physically putting pens of paper happens so rarely. Well, that's, I find it, I struggle with their homework and stuff like that. Because as you were saying, like, you know, you don't enjoy being a single parent. I think when you've got your partner, you realize you're subconscious divvy up jobs that suits the other one more. See, for me and Lou weren't together, and it was just me and my own. Like, there's certain things that I'd find it easier and excel at as a parent. But then, like, I literally, I can't do their homework.
Starting point is 00:35:51 Like I just cannot do it. So Lou takes a lead on that. So if I was left to do that, I'd just be so at sea. And then not only is your workload double, you're having to do stuff that you feel insecure and vulnerable and not very confident in. And then that affects your self-confidence because you feel like you're not being a good parent
Starting point is 00:36:06 because normally you'd hand that over to the one that finds that easier. Yeah, I know exactly right. You can be good cop, bad cop, can't you when you have a pair again? You can flip who's the good cop and the bad cop at each time. Whereas when you're on your own, being a bit schizophrenic. Also, especially with my son, it's because he was the younger one, you know, certainly when Derek was first sick and was in the coma for that year, I just kind of
Starting point is 00:36:31 thought, let's just be happy and just keep ourselves happy. So I was quite bad in the sense that I was definitely sort of saying, oh, we can't get online for that. Just don't worry about that learning. Let's put on, let's watch, let's rewatch Nativity for the 140s. Which is one of his favorite movies. You know, and I didn't care about it. And then I suddenly thought, oh, my God, we're now at GCSEs. So he found it really hard because I was going, come on, Bill. You've got to, you've got to focus. You've got to do this.
Starting point is 00:37:02 And he's looking at me as to say, why have you become a monster? In fact, he said that. Yeah, you know, what happened to come on? There's some chocolate. And let's watch a movie. Mommy, I don't like this, mommy now. So, yeah, I think it is, isn't it? You sort of divvy it up and you let someone be the bad guy.
Starting point is 00:37:19 How do you deal with, because obviously, obviously you're supporting them. Do you feel you have to remain really strong in their company, or do you feel like, like, how do you play that? Well, I'm not sure that I've got a particularly good recipe for it. Definitely, I feel
Starting point is 00:37:35 like I had to stay very strong, so they didn't feel like the world was crumbling. I was very conscious of that, and I know that Derek was very conscious of that. In fact, you know, when he first went into the ambulance, he said, you know, go inside
Starting point is 00:37:51 take care of them. And when he came home, he was like, you know, if Bill was calling for something or Darcy was coming in. And then, and I would say, Darcy, come in here. I'm just dealing with dad. And she would come in and there would be a, and I say, well, talk about it in front of her. She said, such and such. And I want to go out to it. And mum has said no. And try and incorporate Derek into that, that feeling of stability. Because what you don't want to be is a puddle on the floor. Because I just think, one of the things I think, my mom and dad, I never heard them row, actually, I'm sure they had some absolute barnies, but I never heard them row.
Starting point is 00:38:28 And I always had this feeling, you know, like when we went camping in Pembrokeshire for our annual holiday. I didn't really know what was going to be involved. I certainly, you know, when they were struggling to put the tent up, I didn't realize, God, that must have been quite stressful for them. Because to me, it was just, this is what we did on a holiday, it was all going to be okay. You know, the tent would go up. We'd go inside. there would be some food or the private stove that we prepared.
Starting point is 00:38:54 I never had a feeling that things weren't going to be okay, which I think is a real gift because I don't think, I think a lot of children don't have that and definitely my children don't have that. I really am sad about that because, you know, I can't say with confidence, oh, don't worry about it, it'll be fine because they go, no, no, sometimes it's not fine. Sometimes whatever you do, and however hard you try and however hard, you know, dad worked, it wasn't fine.
Starting point is 00:39:22 And I think that shifted something in them where I feel like I have to be really secure and rock solid. So for instance, promises, I'm just really clear. They'll say, do you think we can do this mom? I'd really want to go to this movie.
Starting point is 00:39:37 I was like, I'm not sure. So I'm not going to promise it until I've got the tickets. I feel like a calm waiver on promises. You know what I mean? Yes, absolutely. Before I'd have been like, yeah, we can go to that.
Starting point is 00:39:49 I don't know when we're going to do that. It would be what was happening in my head. But now I'm just like, no, don't say unless you can deliver because I think they need to rebuild a sense of trust. Of course, yeah. Totally. That's a very long answer. No, it's true.
Starting point is 00:40:04 Totally. Yeah, yeah. Enlighting. Especially because, you know, now they're becoming young men and women. They're moving into that different way where they can go, have front conversations with you, you know. Because even with my case now, you'll say stuff like, yeah, we'll do that next week or whatever.
Starting point is 00:40:18 and then you think, oh, they're three or four, they'll forget. They'll forget. And it comes around. And even at 8 and 10, they're like, no, Dad, you said that last week. You've done this twice now. And they'll present me like a solicitor times I've done it wrong. And these are very frivolous things, I promised them. Whereas, like, you know, the things that you've been through have been like much bigger, more brutal things they've experienced.
Starting point is 00:40:37 So you're right. It is about feeling delivery, isn't it? But I also try and say now, like we were, we went to Capital Jinglewell Ball, brilliant, lovely thing because I work at Smooth that you get the chance to go to that. And I was like, I'm not quite sure what we're going here on the tube. And Bill was like, and I said, Bill, come off your phone please. Help me concentrate because I'm not sure I'm going. And I try, and he just said, oh, okay, rather than I think a year ago I'd have been trying to desperately work it out so that I didn't show there was any wobble. But now I'm
Starting point is 00:41:08 a bit like, no, come on Bill, help me. Let's focus on this together. And they do respond to that. Oh, that's brilliant. Yeah. Which I think is something you've, yeah, I have got to do. because otherwise you're just constantly frazzled, don't you? And you have to say, can't do that now, Bill. You have to give me five minutes. And he was like, I don't know your five minutes. They always take hours. I was like, yeah, fair enough.
Starting point is 00:41:32 That's a good point. Could I ask you something about radio, Kate? Yes. And you've got another one about I'm a celebrity as well you wanted to ask. Yeah, the one about the radio is you always get motorbikes between good morning Britain and smooth. Yes. And the men on the motorbikes,
Starting point is 00:41:52 whenever I say who have you had on, they've always had Kate Garroway on. Oh God. You love a motorbike, don't you? I live on the back of those motorbikes. They've become a second home. The first time I used it was when Amy Winehouse passed away
Starting point is 00:42:06 and her dad, that's how long ago it was, her dad would happen to be in New York or something and they said, oh, we want to go out and do an interview. And so I flew out in a like a 36-hour sprint, interviewed him, fed the interview back, and then got the flight back without having slept. And I arrived with huge ankles because I hadn't actually gone flat for 36 hours.
Starting point is 00:42:29 But also, I got off the plane thinking, oh, I'm going to go home to bed now. And I was met by a guy called Kerry who runs limo bike. Oh, yeah. I know Carrie. Lovely Kerry. Saying hi, I'm here to meet you. And I said, oh, okay, that's lovely. I think it, cranky, I mean, there's a lot of leather for an Addison Lee but anyway we went outside and there was his bike and I was like, what are you talking about? They said, oh, they've decided
Starting point is 00:42:58 they want you to go into the studio to talk around the interview so that you can give it some life. I was like, oh my God, I don't like motorbikes, I can't go on it. And it was really raining as well. And he said, but you know that weird adrenaline thing when somebody in work says you've got to do something?
Starting point is 00:43:14 You just can't think of how you could say, So I just always say, yes, got me into a lot of trouble. Anyway, got on the back of it, pulled out of Heathrow, and I said, you're going to have to go really slowly. And he said, look, we're on intercom. Just tell me if there's a problem. So we pulled out, and I was like, too fast, too fast. I was like, okay, we're going nine miles now.
Starting point is 00:43:37 And I was like, okay. So we then headed on to the motorway, and it was horrific. There were lorries going past as rainy. All you can see is your feet below your, you know, down and the road whizzing past, and I just screamed, I screamed solidly for 21 minutes. And then after that 21 minutes, he said, I'm just going to turn the intercom off for a while. I think his ears were bleeding, right? And then we came into London and the sun came up.
Starting point is 00:44:06 And I thought, this is actually quite nice. You're just gliding through the traffic. And then I've been on them ever since. Yeah, I've been on them ever since. I mean, it's a weird thing. It's like this weird kind of pool pick confession. I know everything about all of them. I know when one's guinea pig is sick or, you know, the whole thing.
Starting point is 00:44:24 It's easy to talk to someone. You can't see them. Exactly. But you're connected because you're on the bike. It's a weird. It took their helmet off. I'd walk past them in the street probably. Yeah, it's hard to recognise.
Starting point is 00:44:35 I've done it a couple of times. Yeah, I know. Although what I used to do is when their kids were little, I'd walk them to school for the days that I wasn't doing GMB and get one from home. And so the guy would come to the school gate. And I would get on the back of a motorbike and whizz off. And it just made me seem so exciting.
Starting point is 00:44:57 And then Derek would go in and do like, you know, cutting up paper day or something. And they'd say, oh, we see your wife. But do you ride a motorbike? And they go, no. And they'd all go, oh, okay. She's been in a fair. We're five different motorbike men.
Starting point is 00:45:13 Derek wasn't around. I was disappointed. very off for an illicit affair with a bike. Josh, what should you have a question for Kate? I've always wondered this, Kate. Sorry, yes. No, no, no, no, it's fun. So I wonder whether you won't even remember this, right?
Starting point is 00:45:28 But on the first episode of I'm a celebrity, when you did I'm a celebrity. Right, yeah. And me and some friends saw this, and we've quoted it ever since, right? So do you remember your, I can't remember where you are, but that Andrew Max it arrives on a speedboat. Yes. Yes. I remember.
Starting point is 00:45:50 Do you remember what you said? Do you remember what you said? No. Right. So he is about 50 yards in the distance, right? And there's a small man, isn't it? He's a big guy. And you, it cuts to you, looking out into the distance, and you say,
Starting point is 00:46:07 oh, it's the Irish comedian Andrew Maxwell. And it felt like to us, the producer. had said, quite a lot of people might not know who Andrew Maxwell is. Kate, could you just say, it's the Irish comedian Andrew Maxwell, so that it's clear for the rest of the country? Can you remember this? I can definitely remember saying it. I'm not sure I'm allowed to say whether it was prompting.
Starting point is 00:46:33 Does it sound like the sort of thing people say in normal life? Or does it sound like the sort of thing a producer might have suggested? You'll leave that with you. Yeah, well, yeah, fair enough that you can't comment either way. He's a very funny guy, isn't he, Andrew? He's brilliant, Andrew. Thank you, Kate. Genuinely, you are incredible.
Starting point is 00:46:56 What you've done, you're still, like, and the way you've kind of came through what you've done, and the way you talk about it is so powerful for people. And also, when you're on celebrity traitors, you just came across as a breath of fresh air. It was brilliant. That's you. Kate, we always ask everyone,
Starting point is 00:47:14 the final question about their partner as a parent. What is it Derek did that used to, you know, make you feel in awe of him as a parent? And then what was the thing that used to day-to-day frustrate you and annoy you? Minor quibble. Your minor quibble. Your minor quibble. Well, the minor quibble is really easy. It's the classic one.
Starting point is 00:47:32 Is it parenting or is it just, you know, living with somebody? So there's two things, really. Oh, I'm on a roll now. one was the classic bringing a plate to the vicinity of the dishwasher as though just being in the vicinity meant there was going to be some kind of weird quantum force that got it in.
Starting point is 00:47:57 Yeah, that would pull it in. So that was one. The other one was just the classic thing of allowing the kids to go completely crazy. So you'd come in. from work they'd be there really happy sometimes when Darcy was little
Starting point is 00:48:16 they'd both just be in their pants they would just be in their pants because everything had got so messy there would be a part of clothes by the washing machine everybody'd be really happy and he would be like oh we've had such a great day right I'm going to bed now
Starting point is 00:48:32 and you'd be like right okay I'm glad you're really happy but I'm now going to pick up the carnage so there was that feeling of a very much fun dad, and you had to be the kind of like practical mum, the thing I was, I think, probably most in awe of was the complete ability to be present that he always had with the kids. It was just extraordinary. You could be anywhere. You could be at checkers. You could be in any kind of function or a big business meeting. And he would
Starting point is 00:49:06 just somehow always managed to be present, whether it be he'd had to take them into his office when he had his business. He just managed to make it an exciting thing for them. And holidays, he was incredible. I was funny enough, I was turning some stuff out to get the decorations up the other day. And he used to print out, you know, Billy and Darcy's holiday adventure, wherever we were going. One time we went to three nights to a Premier Inn. It was brilliant, actually, in Guildford, because there was a soft plane nearby they wanted to go to. it's still one of their most favorite long weekends. And you just put loads of little things in of what we were going to do.
Starting point is 00:49:43 So I think it's that ability to be present even when there's chaos going on that I always really admired. Oh, OK, this has been incredible. Thank you so much. Thank you. Yeah, it's been brilliant. You've been a brilliant guest. Thank you so much for doing it.
Starting point is 00:49:57 No problem at all. No problem at all. It's been lovely to chat soon. Kay Garraway, what a great guest. Love her. That was great fun, that, on it? She's brilliant. Brilliant.
Starting point is 00:50:08 She's amazing, you know. Like, it must be so overwhelming for everyone to know what's happened to you and your family in quite extreme detail. And then, you know, caroling your life and people coming up to and stuff like that. But she deals with it really well, I think, and she speaks so well. Yeah. It must be so hard. It's hard going through that anyway, but not every single person on the street knowing. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:50:30 Totally. Totally. Totally. She's doing a brilliant job there. And I loved her in traitors because I just thought she was. fun. It's a TV show. Have a laugh. Right, Josh, I'll see you next time. See you next time.

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