Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S12 EP11: A Kitten Update

Episode Date: February 10, 2026

More misadventures in parenting, life, and beyond with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe... Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please subscribe and ...leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: Hello@lockdownparenting.co.uk Follow us on instagram: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@parentinghell⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: hello@keepitlightmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Local news is in decline across Canada, and this is bad news for all of us. With less local news, noise, rumors, and misinformation fill the void, and it gets harder to separate truth from fiction. That's why CBC News is putting more journalists in more places across Canada, reporting on the ground from where you live, telling the stories that matter to all of us, because local news is big news. Choose news, not noise.
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Starting point is 00:00:52 Breakfast available until 11 a.m. At participating Canadian restaurants for a limited time. Frank's Red Hot is a registered trademark of the French's Food Company LLC. Welcome aboard via rail. Please sit and enjoy. Please sit and sip. Play. Post.
Starting point is 00:01:07 Taste. View and enjoy. Via Rail, love the way. This episode is presented by Vauxhall. So Josh, News UK have voted the new Vauxhall Frontera as the value car of the year 2025. Rightly so. And do you know why I can say that, Rob? Why?
Starting point is 00:01:26 And you know this. I've test driven one. Oh yeah, and I've been test passenger. I got to drive, the front era. Faults. A, the tech was so good, right, that it was just simple. I felt like it was my car the moment we were moving. Yeah?
Starting point is 00:01:41 We had loads of bootroom, you saw that. Oh, I had a little peek in the back. I was thinking this is perfect for a family. It was spacious, it was easy to use. And do you know what as well? No offense. I wasn't too near you. No, exactly.
Starting point is 00:01:53 There's so much space in the front. I didn't feel like I was touching you. I couldn't smell you. It was great. It's available in electric. It's available in petrol hybrid. The electric is cheaper. It is available from 23,995 pounds.
Starting point is 00:02:07 Oh, that sounds like value to me, Josh. That's great value. Great value, top value. Do what I did, Rob. Test drive the new Vauxhall Frontera today. Discover more by searching Vauxhall Frontera online. Hello, you're listening to Parent in Hell with... Margot.
Starting point is 00:02:25 Say... Josh? Josh. Widdickham. And Rob? Rob. Beckett. Beckett.
Starting point is 00:02:35 Josh Whittacom? Yeah. Josh Wittickickham. And Rob Beckett. Rob Beckett. Well done. Don't need to go again. That was good, that I thought.
Starting point is 00:02:45 That was a good one. Yeah, very good. Twice. Hello, bitches. This is Margot, who will be five in July. Been sending this clip since she was two. Love the pod, saw Rob in South End and seen Josh in London in May, Chloe. In Epping.
Starting point is 00:03:01 Oh, Epping forest. We went to the forest yesterday. Right, mate, come on. What? You can't yawn yet. I can. That's what people like. Is it?
Starting point is 00:03:13 Yeah. You went, sorry, Guy. You went where? Forest yesterday. Went to the forest. Which one? Very nice. Holden Forest near Exeter.
Starting point is 00:03:22 Very pleasant. Very pleasant. Nothing to report, really. I was just associating with words, really. You've got a new chair. I'm viking. I feel great. I feel great.
Starting point is 00:03:34 You look uncomfortable. I feel good. I find comfort in being uncomfortable. You like the pain, don't you? It's February, and I've been reflecting. I feel like I've not been giving you. I think you've been reflecting too much. I don't think I've been giving you, Josh, and by, you know, by proxy, the listener, the best of me in these
Starting point is 00:03:55 Monday morning ones. I don't, I think you've been good. I don't think there's been a problem. Well, I've not enjoyed it. No, I know, but that, it's not about you. Well, I would like to enjoy it. So I'm laying that down, 80% January, right? And now it's February.
Starting point is 00:04:10 And people go, oh, it's just February. It doesn't matter. It's that. No, when I leave the house now, it's daylight. And that has a huge impact on me. Leaving a house in the dark is not good for you. It's not good for the soul. Okay, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:24 So 80% January, now it's February. 20%, no. How many percent that's have I got left? That'd be all the percents, wouldn't it? But how many things have been problematic? 15 percent of it's been me and allowing myself to indulge in being negative, even though I do feel negative, so I've not helped myself. And then 5 percent's been the chair.
Starting point is 00:04:47 Right, okay. I've not enjoyed the chair that we've been using since we've started filming these. I feel slobby, I'm laying down. Now I've got a straight back chair, and I feel like I'm in the waiting room of a dentist, and I'm ready to go. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel good.
Starting point is 00:05:00 Of course, whenever I'm in the waiting room of a dentist, I think I'm ready to broadcast. Let's do this. I'm ready to save my broadcasting career. Oh, please don't call it broadcast. Broadcast, yeah. I hate broadcaster.
Starting point is 00:05:14 It's the worst term. I think we spoke about it. It's a weird one, isn't it? I don't think we have spoken about it, but it is a weird one because it does mean I don't quite know what I am. Well, yeah, exactly. No, you feel a sports presenter or like a broad. It's just, I'm so broad.
Starting point is 00:05:29 broad. He's like, you're nothing. Fucking double down on what you are and do it. I'm a broadcaster. I'm coming to a conclusion, Rob. Go on. I don't think presenting is as difficult as people who do it. Pretend. It's a complete sham.
Starting point is 00:05:45 It is, isn't it? No, no, let's start again. Being really, really good at Anton Deck are unbelievably good at presenting. I think Joel Domit's excellent presenting. There's loads of people you can. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa, war, war, Anton Decker, very good. Did you see the way Joel slid into shot wearing a bright mental suit on my singer?
Starting point is 00:06:07 That was good presenting. I think Joel's fine. Stop being mean to Joel. I'm joking. You know I'm Joe. I went for dinner with him just last week. You little media elite, in your big slobby chair, not like me, one of the people, sat here with a straight back. You're straight back and no media friends.
Starting point is 00:06:25 No, so, but I do think you can be a bad TV. presenter and earn well. But there are really good guys. But it's one of those jobs. That's a good one, isn't it? What jobs can you do badly but still get by? And I think TV presenting is one of them. I think being bad at TV presenting is a crime, Rob.
Starting point is 00:06:42 A crime? Yeah. It's not difficult enough for you to be bad at it. Well, it is just reading and looking. Do you know what I mean? Because it's written up there. You don't even have to remember it. A bad surgeon.
Starting point is 00:06:59 All right. It's tough, okay? I'm a bad footballer. Of course you are. Everyone's trying to be good at this. Yeah. I think, I think, though, with TV presenters, there's a lot of framework to support you
Starting point is 00:07:10 if you are bad to get you out jail. Because that Claudio and Traitors is great. Oh, she's incredible. I worked with Alison Hammond and Dermot O'Leary on Friday, and I've got to say, Rob. Yeah. Dermott's hugs go from strength to strength. See, I struggle with a hug in TV land.
Starting point is 00:07:27 We've spoken about this before. Dermott's hugs are like... I'll take one off Dermot. Dermott's hugs are like nothing I've ever experienced. Why are these... So when did you see Dermott and Alison? On this morning. You was on this morning last week?
Starting point is 00:07:42 On Friday. Okay, sorry, it's just that we were chatting about you saying no to things and coming up to London. But you... I was in town for the last leg. Right, okay. That's fine. Also, it's difficult to get in on. There's not many things you can get on now.
Starting point is 00:07:57 because there's this couple that are doing every fucking promo opportunity at the moment. So there's not many gaps. All right. So you're blaming a debut woman writer. No, and she's stopping you getting on Saturday Kitchen Live. No, I'm not blaming her.
Starting point is 00:08:14 You're blaming me? I'm blaming the guy that keeps turning up on a fucking bears. Oh, mate, I've done one interview with Lou. No, you haven't because I saw the Times one. I came up on my Instagram. I didn't do it. I was in town. I popped him for the photo.
Starting point is 00:08:27 He popped it for the first even worse Well they said look So the way look No no no no no no I'm got a problem with it Rob Because what I'm doing I'm going to say good on you Because
Starting point is 00:08:40 Hang on no no no You're very anti-promo normally But you've realised that it's good to If you've done something that you believe in it's good to make it But I'm not anti-promo at all I understand the merits of promo And you have to do it as part of the job I would suggest
Starting point is 00:08:57 And all that you have to do it part of the job. No. I'm saying, let me talk that. No, let me get a little chair back. Get his old chair back. I can't get a word in.
Starting point is 00:09:07 I feel good. Get his old chair back. You were complaining about doing too much promo and it became overwhelming. Yes, you were. You said you had a complete burnout and it was manic and they weren't sleeping in hotels. That's not complaining. That's just me. Fair enough then.
Starting point is 00:09:24 You're right then. If that's your shit. No, I was surprised you were doing more when you said you wanted to, didn't want to do it. Are you done now with your promo? This morning had been moved back because the dates, they wanted me to do it with Alison and Dermott. Because I've got an ongoing chemistry with those two. Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:09:44 A bit like with Mark Ruffalo thinks you're a paedophile. Exactly. You're a little runner. Yeah, I'm doing a little interview with Mark Ruffalo. Is it the end of the promo? No, there's a couple of it. Look, can I, can I, full disclosure? I think I'm in a similar position.
Starting point is 00:10:02 Go on. I think I'm in a similar position to Lou, right? Yeah. Apart from I don't have this guy turning up every time I'm trying to spread my wings and fly. Completely. Can I say something? So Lou is, let me finish. Let me just pop in and say hi.
Starting point is 00:10:20 Yeah, I'll get in the photo. That's fine. Yeah, yeah. Don't worry, Lou. No, they'll use the ones just to get. Why don't we just get one with me and you, Lou? Can I just loo? to be in this.
Starting point is 00:10:31 Yeah, yeah. Can I just have the photo of me? Oh, I'm not looking awful with the photo. I'm like doing a weird little stupid girl. When you are at you earlier, you're just popping in, aren't you? I don't they even knew you. Popped in the phone, and we jumped into the photo.
Starting point is 00:10:44 She didn't even know you were there. I'll drive you up, Lou, just in case you need me in the phone. No, so you've got, Lou's doing loads of promo without me. And one, because she needs to sort of do it all on her own anyway, it's Lou, if they're sometimes asking, for me and Luke's. They love that, don't they? Have another couple on, like, oh, so get us to argue. Has your agent phoned you yet to say? We've had a couple of production companies that love your chemistry on Saturday Kitchen. Would you like to
Starting point is 00:11:12 open a cafe together and make a TV show about it? We were asked to do a show together before this promo stuff anyway, but we've, like a reality thing, but we said no. Rob, there's a go-car track that's running to disrepair near your house. I hate a car in. No, You think it would be great if you and Lou could do a laser quest. I'll take over a local golf course that's falling in. Say it, Rob. There's people listening. There's production companies now that are currently making a deck with a picture of you.
Starting point is 00:11:45 Yeah. Currently photoshopping you onto some golfing outfit with Louis I. If you can, there is one near me. If there is, if you can, if you're a production company and you can get a golf course within a 20 minute drive to me that I can take over. and turn around from disrepair into great golf club. I'll do that. I think the problem with it is that one, Rob. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:07 There's the salt of the earth feeling with a lot of them, isn't there? Danny Dyer's Caravan Park. Yeah. Gus Khan sprang up cars. Oh yeah, and Alan Carbite Castle. Yeah, real working man shit. No, but they buy it for nothing and they give it to someone who's in need of it. I want to pay nothing and be giving it.
Starting point is 00:12:25 Yeah, yeah. And also it's a golf club, which is the most excluded. kind of place. The most overly privileged, exclusive. Do you know what? Watching those golfers go around the golf club, he's done something great for the community. Finally, that 65-year
Starting point is 00:12:39 retirement investment guy can now play golf without divvets. It's amazing what Rob's achieved. And he's, you know, those guys are paying five grand a year membership and they're managing to get around that course now because of Robbed it with those bunkers. Can I go back to promo? Yes, you go on.
Starting point is 00:13:04 and then I'll explain myself after you throw in a Spursions. I just, I'm not, I don't, I don't want to throw aspersions. You tell me about promo and I'll try and work out how to firstly spell a Spurgeon. I'm not, I'm not going to tell you about promo while you, while you just look at your phone and Google. That's, that's not how conversation works. You tell me about a, you do a little speech and I'll work out what I'm going to say next on my phone.
Starting point is 00:13:28 I'm not sure about this chair. It might be the massive fucking coffee I've had. Look at how it's like this. Oh my God. No, I've had sleep and sunlight. I'm fucking flying. Yeah, aspersions, ASP. Anyway, let's move on.
Starting point is 00:13:46 Promo. Yeah, I think I'm in the same position as Lou. Attached to me forever, whether you want to or not. Exactly. I just want a photo on my fucking own. Let me respond to this bit first. So, with Lou's, P.R., obviously, Lose a new writer, right?
Starting point is 00:14:02 Yeah. But she's also married to me, and she's got a book about parenting, and we do a big parenting. It makes sense. And it's a big podcast. So we'll have requests for Lou, but they'll say with Rob. And what we've been saying is, no, it's Lou on her own. However, if the opportunity is too big to turn down, we will go, all right, we'll go together.
Starting point is 00:14:21 So Saturday Kitchen. And I think there's another one. So the only, and we did G.K. Barry, because G.K. Barry is my mate. That's coming out. But, yeah. So it's only the Saturday Kitchen we've done together. And there's one more interview. But the rest is all Lou in her own.
Starting point is 00:14:33 So she's done loads. She's done that Giovanna Fletcher's podcast and stuff like that. So she's doing them on her own. but if it's too big of opportunities turn down, hey, can you blame us? No, I can't blame Lou at all. But, you know, if they're desperate for Lou to do an interview and then you pop up in the photo,
Starting point is 00:14:50 then we can all enjoy it. You know, look, this is what annoys me. I know. You know how much I hate photos shoes. I know. I'm doing that because I love my wife and I want to help her in her journey back into work. Exactly. Because something I've been struggling with, which is really weird, right?
Starting point is 00:15:05 Yeah. I, in my professional life now, not bulletproof, but much thicker skin than I was. You're certainly not bulletproof. No, no one is. If you think you're bulletproof, that's the big problem. But obviously still vulnerable to criticism, but not as bad as I was when I was younger. I've got loads of coping mechanisms now. I've done lots of therapy.
Starting point is 00:15:24 I've got lots of meditations I do and lots of breathing to calm down when it's about me. However, now, and what I've always had is Lou and the girls at home, and my job is to protect them and provide for them. And I take a lot of pride in that and a lot of self-worth in that that I can give them a lifestyle. We never thought we'd be able to have. And we've got a great relationship. And they're in our little cocoon of our family home.
Starting point is 00:15:47 And I love it. But now, Lou's obviously going back out into the world and going out in a very visible public way, more so than she did before when she was a teacher. And I find it really difficult to not get panicked and overwhelmed for her. Even though she's dealing with it brilliantly. but it's actually a brilliant sort of example of how it's going to feel with my daughters 1718 and going to uni or going to work, they're on social media and they're like going,
Starting point is 00:16:16 whether it's going to be public visible or if it's more private, but either way, they're going to be putting themselves out there. And I as the dad will have no control at all over how it goes and there's nothing I can really do. And in some cases, doing too much may be harmful. So it's an incredibly weird thing to go. Oh, like, it's sort of like an early example of, this makes me sound like some sort of like toxic overprotective partner.
Starting point is 00:16:42 But I don't know, I just find it really. Of course. And it's almost, it fires off the same reactions in my brain as when it was me 15 years ago starting out. And it's such a weird experience. Yeah, I can imagine. And also, I think we know that we're pretty, you're not bulletproof, but actually...
Starting point is 00:17:01 We presume that we get criticized quite a lot. There must be lots of people who hate us, right? Oh, yeah, but yeah. But I don't really care about that anymore because I'm pretty confident there's enough people that like me, if you know what I mean. Yeah. But it's much more...
Starting point is 00:17:18 I'm just used to it. Like, I'm just used to it being me and I just ignore that now and I know it exists. What I mean is I've got the confidence that what I'm doing isn't shit. I've always thought this with criticism. It hurts the most. when you fear it, when that is something that you deep down fear yourself.
Starting point is 00:17:35 So if someone said, if you said to me now, right, that parenting hell is shit, then I wouldn't care because I know it is. Do you know what I mean? Or if you said, I don't think you're good to hand up. I go, well, I don't, I'm confident that I have bad gigs. I feel low about my stand up. I, you know, I have days when I, you know, it's like shit. am I still, all those things that every stand-up has.
Starting point is 00:18:04 Yeah. But the truth is, if you criticize my stand-up tour, I go, I'm there most nights. I know it's a really good tour. Yeah, and it is what it is. You have a like it. It's like, you know. But being loose starting out now. And so that's the same thing, right?
Starting point is 00:18:16 So that's the same thing I have when this new podcast came out, right? Yeah. Is that you're terrified because you're totally exposed, right? Which I could promotion at work. If you're like in, if you work to be in a more office job, right? All of a sudden you get this promotion to be in charge of this. new department, which is your new podcast, in any job, you feel this pressure of, oh my God, now it's back on me again. Can I still do this? Am I good enough? Exactly. And then it comes out
Starting point is 00:18:42 and then I want to promote it loads because I want it to be a success mainly. I know this sounds bullshit, but it is true. I let yesterday, my son said this, but he was like, when are you going to stop going away for work? Oh, God. he said are you going to stop needing to work soon and I felt awful because I'd been away for three days and I thought no I'm like but mainly because I want this
Starting point is 00:19:12 because TV is really fucking tenuous at the moment yeah and I don't want to leave the house as much so this is a way for me to try and work more in Devon do this do the other podcast museum and pop culture to tune in my son desperate my son's desperate my son need me love me need me i want a situation so i'm doing this
Starting point is 00:19:38 promo to leave the house less in the long term yeah in the short term yeah in the short term it's better for me to go and do alice and hamond and dermot o'leary because if i can make this work then i don't need to go up for so many corporates or do you know what i mean it's like that's what my thought process. Well, it's constant balance, isn't it? It's really difficult, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:20:01 Rob, it's really difficult. Let's talk about our kids. What I would say is, well, luckily for me, I've read Lou's book, and it's amazing, and she's an amazing writer. So I've got full confidence,
Starting point is 00:20:10 and I know she's brilliant. If Lou had come to me and said, I'm going to release a country music album, and I've heard her sing, I'd probably be less inclined to pop up for the photos or gone on the interviews, because I don't think I'd believe in the project.
Starting point is 00:20:23 Right, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the other thing. How would you say to me, I'm going to go and be a drum and bass DJ. Well, I'd go, I'm fucking delighted first and foremost. Make sure you don't fall over in a puddle trying to get into the rainbow. Yeah, of course, yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:37 Anyway, what's going to do you want to tell by kids? I was just going to say on that. That is true because me and you have, there's nothing worse is that that's the other reason why I'm happy to do loads of promo because I believe in it. We won't name names. We've both done things probably that we don't believe in. and then you contractually obliged to do promo.
Starting point is 00:20:58 I don't know what you're talking about. Oh, Rob. It is fucking awful. You feel so... Do you know what's easier, though? The thing is, though, it's not as bad for comedians. No, no, no, no. I think the world really needs this.
Starting point is 00:21:12 Yeah. Well, what's easier for us as stand-ups is, though, even if you are doing that a show, you can switch it back to it all, so I've got a stand-up tour on or the podcast or whatever. It's these actors, when I've, you know, you've been on Graham Norton and Jonathan Ross with them, when they've got a film that it's just like they hate,
Starting point is 00:21:28 but they've got a set. And that's the only thing you're allowed to talk to them about. Oh my God. Oh, my God. Right. Tell me about your kids. Because I've told you that my son thinks I shouldn't leave the house anymore. Oh, talking about, it's just reminded me, talking about like people criticize you online and stuff.
Starting point is 00:21:43 A comment popped up and it was when we was on Saturday kitchen. And now, Lou's, because Lou's got colitis, right? Certain foods set a stomach off, especially like rich and fatty foods. And there was like pork and then there was this lamb. And the food was amazing. but Lou was like, I know Lou couldn't really eat it. So I just said to a little, when the food comes, I'll just like, get tucked in
Starting point is 00:22:02 and then you can have a little bit around the edge of the stuff that won't make your stomach. Does they make you share a plate? Yeah, and you make you share a plate. And also it's like you've got to be, the whole point is eating and trying the food. But like, you know, you can't go, you know. Why didn't you do a plate each?
Starting point is 00:22:15 Well, that would be worse because you definitely wouldn't have eaten any of it. Oh, no, I know, but it's just a, you know. So anyway, I'm eating it. And then some of those are disgusting. The way he took that food off his wife, and gobbled it all down. She barely had a chance to eat it. No manners.
Starting point is 00:22:29 And I was like, she fucking won't eat anything. I'm fucking saving her. But anyway, we're fine with Chris. I'm fine with Chris. I'm like, you know, as it's discussed, absolutely bulletproof. I'm saying, bang, ting, ting, what's that? Ting, that's a bullet's falling off a fucking chest, mate, one of a chair. I don't know if I like me in this chair.
Starting point is 00:22:49 I feel like, I'm, I feel like, it bounces as well. And I feel like that. What? You don't like the balance? It looks like you shagging. It's how you shag. Like, no,
Starting point is 00:23:01 that's how you shagg. It looks like you're shagg. No, that's not how to shag. Quite short duration, but fucking manic energy. Well, that's how.
Starting point is 00:23:11 I'm not surprised. Right. We went to, um, the O2. Do you ever go to the O2 for a day out? What, when nothing's on?
Starting point is 00:23:21 Uh, yeah. You're the kids. I didn't even consider that an option in life. It's great. Now, I'm going to talk you through it. So we went with a kids, we met our friends and their two kids. There's something on. Well, this is the problem. The quality of, so at the O2, you can go, we went to Tocca Social. Have you seen this? No. It's a football thing where you have a screen and the balls come out and you have to kick
Starting point is 00:23:44 the balls at the screen. It's like a golf simulator, but football and you get points and it's like there's like games to play, right? Kids loved it, really good fun and you can order food and drink, almost like you have your own little driving range booth. And then like in the main area, there's a bar, it's all got the football on. The kids loved it. We played football doing that. It got quite toxic because I like football.
Starting point is 00:24:04 And I would recommend a vest and shorts to play because I went in jeans and a t-shirt and I was sweating. It was disgusting. Right, right, right, yeah. So it was doing all that. So that was good. And then afterwards we went to that a karaoke.
Starting point is 00:24:15 There's a place where you can hire karaoke rooms. Yeah. So you can have the whole rooms yourself. So we was having a few drinks, doing karaoke and stuff like that. And it's really good fun. and then there was like, we had some food after us. And there's loads of other things you can do when you're there.
Starting point is 00:24:27 So we was doing that. The problem is, it depends who's on. Last time we did it, we did it on a Sunday and Lord was on. Yep. So that'll be quite a nice, a heavily female skewing audience. Yeah, and very young girls. So a lot of them are queuing up. Young girls, so quite in touch with their emotions.
Starting point is 00:24:46 Yep. And they're all queuing. There's a section where they all sit quietly, cross leg, queuing up so that when the doors open at half six, they go straight in and get to the front so they're near her for the songs, right? That's the vibe. And then older people coming in later for the seating. When we went on Saturday, Jason Derulo was on.
Starting point is 00:25:05 Right. I've met Jason Tarullo, actually. There we go. What's he like? Good guy? I don't, he held up the record of Jonathan Ross. we all had to wait from to finish his Nando's so I was a little annoyed at that. Well, I always think of Jason Derulo.
Starting point is 00:25:26 I'll go, Jason de Rulo. And then he taught me to do that. What's that dance where you put your up? The dab? Yeah, he taught us all to dab. Right. My main memory is he sleeps in a circular bed. Okay.
Starting point is 00:25:44 Is that what he told you or on the interview? That's my main take home was the Nando's the circular bread and bed and dabbing. But anyway, yeah, it's not the ideal audience. I have not seen people like... But Sean, it's quite a mainstream audience. It's not like an edgy audience. No, no, no. But I'd say it is absolutely shit-faced women.
Starting point is 00:26:07 Oh, right. From the age of 25 to 45, all dressed up to the nines. Was this an evening show, sorry? Oh, yes. So they were coming in. And you know, some people that are into their music, love watching the support? Yeah. Not the Darulo guys.
Starting point is 00:26:24 They were on it. Absolutely shit-faced. So like stumbling around. So it's like a really weird. And they were all going in late, obviously, and stuff like that. So what I would say is if you are planning a day trip to the O2, pick wisely. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I didn't even know a day trip to the O2 was a thing.
Starting point is 00:26:42 Do you know what? It is. And it's great fun. There's loads of good restaurants. Yeah. There's shopping. There's loads of your cinema. There's the football thing.
Starting point is 00:26:51 Bowling. karaoke, Mama Mia the party, Tucker Social. It's great. And it's all in a big circle. And it's covered. Good at winter. I wouldn't go there for a summer day out.
Starting point is 00:27:02 But it's a good day out for the kids. And there's trampoline park. There's a thing where you can indoor skydive, the Pizza Express. But yeah, it was good fun. So we did that. That was good. Jason Derulo was quite hardcore.
Starting point is 00:27:14 So had you checked Jason Derulo? Like, had you thought, because in my head, the O2, I actually love Jason. Do you. I'd be honest about the O2. Lou loves Jason Darulo Right so she managed to double up
Starting point is 00:27:25 At one point Before we knew it was doing Saturday Kitchen Because we did Saturday Kitchen Then went there We were contemplating And Lou was contemplating And get a ticket to go and see Derulo And I'd just take the kids though
Starting point is 00:27:34 Yeah well you should have Oh what She was too tired from Saturday kitchen You know why she was too tired Because she hadn't anything to eat Because you'd scoffed all her food She was so nervous Guess what time she woke up
Starting point is 00:27:50 7. 3.30 a. Oh my God. For the day. Oh my God. And we got picked up at seven. And then I had to get there really early because Lou had to get there done. Can I just say, Rob, I don't think you should film a show where you're in Lua managing a golf course because if she's getting up at 3.30 every day with nerves, that's going to really take the side.
Starting point is 00:28:13 No, but she won't. It'll be me doing a golf course. It's not going to be a family show. We said no to the family shows. It's too much. Well, Beck is golf. course. Love it. There is a really old one near me.
Starting point is 00:28:26 Rob. I'd love that. You know that the production companies are currently they're just knocking up the deck as we speak. This is how this show works. I'm going to try and find out who owns that golf course and see if we can they'll do it for you. Yeah, but you can't buy a golf course. There's so much money. It's not like an house. It's a whole business, isn't it? It's owned by the council. Oh dear. It's a nine whole golf course near...
Starting point is 00:28:48 Nine? Yeah. That's starting small, mate. It's going to be my first one. That's half a golf course. Do you struggle with this? Well, the kids want to watch something, right? Now, we've got Netflix, Sky, Disney.
Starting point is 00:29:03 I think that's it. I think that's... Amazon. Prime, yeah, got that. They wanted to watch Harry Potter. Right. I just don't know. I feel like I need,
Starting point is 00:29:11 because I sort of feel like I should have access to that somewhere. It must be on Disney, must be. But I couldn't find, but I don't know. But it's like... Sky movies. Is it on Sky movies? No, I think it might be Prime. But it's not just Harry Potter.
Starting point is 00:29:21 Every time I'm like, you go to one, you go to on Prime, or you've got to rent it or buy it on Sky, you've got rented it by it. But you're going to try it. And then it's on Netflix a bit. Then it moved. Gabby Gilmore, one's gone now. So I think we need, like, an app that you type in where you're living, like, UK. I want to watch this film. And it tells you where it is.
Starting point is 00:29:38 So, like, I would say Netflix included or it was not available. Or it'll go down to like Prime but 299 or available on Disney. You can just do that, yeah. How do you do that then? It's poor Google. No, it's not called. Google. Find where Harry Potter is now in the UK.
Starting point is 00:29:54 Where can I watch that, please? Okay. Yeah? And then you tell me, because it's impossible. But then you're trying to remember, you're logging and you're, I just bought it on Sky in the end. I've got the old lot, the old bundle lot. Okay, it's, it's in Sky Store for 349, Amazon Prime for 349, Apple TV for 349, or Google
Starting point is 00:30:13 Play Movies and TV for 249. But it's not included anywhere for free? No. I'll just go, I'll tell you what I do is just wait for JK rolling to tweet and then the price will probably go down. Just watch app. Here we go, Michael. There you go.
Starting point is 00:30:32 Well, I've just done it for you. No, it's not the same. I think you're not doing that properly. Okay. Just watch that. Michael, I haven't got, can you quickly, see if you just search for it, Harry Potter. Stream free on Prime Video. So if you've got Prime, that's the way it's free.
Starting point is 00:30:50 That's it. This is great. So a Just Watch app, that's what you need. So you type it in there and tell you which platform it's on. There you go. Yeah, so no, too, you were wrong, Josh. What do you mean? Well, you just told me it was free.
Starting point is 00:31:02 I had to pay for it everywhere. Well, it says 349 on Amazon. It obviously didn't know as a member. Oh, right, if you're a member. Yeah. Prime video, hang on. Prime video if you remember. There you go.
Starting point is 00:31:18 Oh, no, that's bollocks. That's an advert. you fucking cunt, sorry. You are right. I scroll down on that app and it said Prime Video, but it's promoted. All that says is watch similar movies on Prime Video for free. So it's implied that it isn't. You have to pay for it.
Starting point is 00:31:35 Apologies, Josh, you were right. It's a roller coaster this, isn't it? So basically, if you want to watch Harry Potter, you've got to pay for it. I bought a bundle on Sky because I couldn't find it anywhere. All seven. All seven. All seven. I. thought she's on third one.
Starting point is 00:31:52 It'll be cheaper to get all seven now. You know, I've got invested in my future. Is that the one where you get to keep? What I hate is this one where you've got 48 hours to watch the film. It feels so much pressure. Once you start watching the film, you've got 48 hours. So you're like, okay, am I going to fit this in in the next 48 hours? But what annoys me is I feel like I swear I've already bought this once 20 years ago.
Starting point is 00:32:16 And it's somewhere. I don't even get to keep it. I think it goes after 48 hours. I'm talking about like when I bought it on DVD or bought it on like iTunes. Well, I bought loads of albums on iTunes. And I bought loads of films, but they're just fucking gone again. Because there's new loggings. It's life.
Starting point is 00:32:32 It's life. We'll all be dust soon. Oh, do you want to psychoanalyze me, Josh? I do every day, Rob, just to myself. You want me to do it out loud? I was at the, I was at the David Lloyd going to the gym. Yeah. Why do you always call it the David Lloyd?
Starting point is 00:32:47 I could just say the gym, couldn't I? Yeah. Well, no, I need to say the David Lloyd. Wait, I don't actually. No, I was saying it because what the lady said to me, lovely lady, right? And I was going to my car and she said, oh, I didn't know you belonged here.
Starting point is 00:33:03 You don't. Well, and I was like, oh, right, yeah, no, I'm a member here, blah, blah, blah, and said hello and then she went off away. Nice interaction. Lovely lady. No problem with her whatsoever. But when she said you belonged here, my brain went, no, I fucking don't.
Starting point is 00:33:17 But I wasn't angry with her. I was angry at the idea that I belonged somewhere. Yeah. Where I feel, I think of myself as I don't belong anywhere. You're a troubadour on the road. I don't know. You're tossing out jokes to strangers to make money for your family, but you don't belong anywhere.
Starting point is 00:33:35 You are. Yeah. You're an individual. Where you put your head down at night, that's where you belong. Well, yeah, but what's wrong with belonging somewhere? But I didn't like it. No, you didn't like it. I tell you what it is, Rob.
Starting point is 00:33:49 What? do you want me to psychoanalyze you? Yeah, it's please. I'm on my little chair. You hate to be boxed. You don't enjoy judgment of who you are. And you feel like the moment someone throws you into a group, you kick against it. You are 20 years ago last week, whatever people say I am, that is what I'm not.
Starting point is 00:34:14 That is how you feel about the one. It is, isn't it? Yeah. So if I was to say to you something really simple, like you are a comedian, you probably think, I'm not actually, I do loads, I do podcasting, I do TV.
Starting point is 00:34:31 Actually, you don't, and I suppose that goes back to school. I think everything goes back to for you. I don't feel that teacher telling your mum that you aren't going to do anything. Yes, I'm really against in everyone. So I can't be on their side because then I've given up. because I'm agreeing with them, even if it's a positive thing. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:51 Because I was always told. I'd say being a member of a gin is a neutral thing. It's neither here nor that. It's not a qualitative judgment on you either way, right? No, but it was the word belong. Because when you said you're a comedian, I was like, yeah, I am. But in a way, I look at that as a part of me that what I do. And I could never dispute that.
Starting point is 00:35:09 I'm not a comedian as in, but I'm more than a comedian. No, yeah, I don't feel like that. But I don't like, it's the belonging of being a part of something. I mean, you know, I even are being an Arsenal fan. I like watching Arsenal. I love Deen Riot and I followed them. But I'm not like, when they go, oh, yeah, when I see other people like that, yeah, come on, let's go us Cooners. I feel like I can't really do it.
Starting point is 00:35:33 I feel like that. I feel like that with Plymouth fans. I don't feel, because I never went as a kid, so I feel a bit disingenuous going on because I wasn't from the local area. I didn't walk there with my dad. It's not in me culturally. It's a, I picked a team that was on the telly when I watched football. you know.
Starting point is 00:35:49 So I don't think I'd feel disingenuous to be at the parade when Arsenal or if Arsenal win a cup. What about if someone said you're, you'd say, you're Kent and proud, are you? No, I'm quite passionate about England in the football. Yeah. But even there, yeah, so, yeah, belong. It was the belong got me. And I was like, and she was so sweet and nice. And she was, that's because that's just the terminology they probably use for memberships.
Starting point is 00:36:14 She hasn't, she hasn't thought. No, no, no, I've got nothing. I was like I kind of expressed there was no negativity towards her and I was really polite about her but as I was having the conversation at the end I was like that word you belong here really fucking
Starting point is 00:36:26 piss me off yeah I can see that I can understand I tell what's wrong with me and now for a special part of today's show what age should you be left at and it's brought to you by Monzo yes basically we're going to discuss
Starting point is 00:36:41 what age kids should be left to get on with things themselves Monzo helps give kids a safer step into independence of money setting goals, budgeting and spending while parents still have oversight, so that part feels covered. But what about the other stuff? Like, can they use a toaster, for example? Or have their own phone? That's a very picky one. Now, Josh, what age are you going to let your kids go out of the house on their own to the local shop?
Starting point is 00:37:05 Well, we've been discussing this, Rob. I've been talking about, like, she's got other friends who live nearby who walk past our house to go to school. Yeah. And what age are we going to send them to school? I reckon at about 10, they will walk as a group. to school, kind of picking up people on the way like a bus. Yeah, see, that's hard for us because they're in a village. We let the kids go to the neighbour to get parcels on their own. What about if you went to a shop and you were like, oh, there's no parking or something? Because you just go in and get, you know, a pint of milk.
Starting point is 00:37:36 I'd probably, the 8-year-old and 10-year-old, I'd send them in together to a garage to buy something with cash if I'm parked outside the garage. If I'm in a restaurant, I can let them go to the toilet on their own. Yeah. Give me another one. Give me another one to test the age. Oven. I think they could do that now, my daughter, but she doesn't.
Starting point is 00:37:55 But I think she could easily. They both make me scrambled eggs. They can do that on their own. What age were you allowed to go to school? It was a driving thing, but then at 11, I got the bus, and I'd walk to the bus stop on my own. So 11. I think that's the secondary school's the one, in it?
Starting point is 00:38:11 Well, here's the thing on the other side. Yeah. My son, I don't want to swear on it. wiped his own bum the other day. Yeah. Because he's four. Part of me was like, well, that is good. But how good to the job he's done?
Starting point is 00:38:26 Do you know what I mean? Do your kids use toast? Do they do their own toast? Do they do their own breakfast yet? No, because he doesn't. Obviously. Yeah, obviously. And I end up doing it, but they could do it.
Starting point is 00:38:38 Do you know what I mean? My daughter could, she doesn't have toast, though. I've got into a pancake situation. Do yours do their own? They'll make their own breakfast, So they'll get their cereal out and milk and bowl and spoon, or they'll make their own toast and butter it. And they can make eggs if they want to make eggs.
Starting point is 00:38:53 Lou makes the pancakes, the mix, but I think we get into a point when they could make their own pancakes. I wouldn't want to use a hot pan without us downstairs. No, exactly, Rob. Toaster's all right without us. Do you know what? If you want a kid to help, my daughter's got very into, in the morning,
Starting point is 00:39:08 she's done a checklist, which we go through. And it kind of empowers her to be part of it rather than me just telling her the next thing. if you know what I mean. Yeah. And they do really want to do these things. That's the thing. We presume they're resistant.
Starting point is 00:39:22 Oh, will someone do everything for me? But the truth is, they enjoy the feeling grown up of it. We're the problem. We're the problem. We do too much for them. Do you know what would really help on that, Rob? What? A Monzo card.
Starting point is 00:39:35 Because that empowers them. Then they can just go out and pay for breakfast. Exactly. They can go out and have avocado on toast. Would you let them pack the bags for the holiday, Rob? Not the whole holiday, maybe hand luggage. Hand luggage, yeah, I think that's fair. But then if you'd let them, they'll just pack like 20 teddys.
Starting point is 00:39:52 Because they're not practical. They're not going to go, I do need some factor 50. Yeah, I do need an extra swimming costume because if that one's wet, I'd want to put that one back on. There you have it. Monzo helps take care of the money stuff and we'll take care of the rest. Monzo's award-winning account for under 16s. Download your new favourite bank. For children at age 6 to 15, parents are gone.
Starting point is 00:40:14 Guardian account needed first. UK residents only. Tees and C's apply. Do you want a kitten update, Rob? Oh, yes, please. So they are incredibly affectionate, but my kids do keep just carrying them round because they're willing to put up with it.
Starting point is 00:40:33 That's good, though. Yeah, but then I wouldn't describe my son as, you know, he's quite heavy-handed with the kittens. Yeah, but I think that's good because then they get used to it and they're like not going to be bite or scratch your defensive. They're just like, you know, he's not hurting them, is it? I like being bitten by the kittens, Rob. I play fighting with the kittens and I like being bitten by them
Starting point is 00:40:55 and then licked by their rough tongues, Rob. Hello? I just... What? What? I don't want to always feel like I'm having a go. Do you have a hint? Like, you're fucking serving them up.
Starting point is 00:41:11 What do you mean? So you like being bitten by your kids. and you like being licked by them. Yeah, we have like play fight. I'll play fight with the cat, kitten. Yeah, but they just like, are they actually, like, they're just sort of like gumming you almost with their teeth.
Starting point is 00:41:26 They're like holding. Yeah. No, yeah, that's fine if you like that. Good for you. And the cats are enjoying it. Are you dressed? What? Oh, it's biting me on the dick as well.
Starting point is 00:41:38 Gum in the little foreskin, yeah? She's know what? I walked past Sunspill the other day, and I thought, You guys don't realize how good you get it from me. I disagree. I would actually say they're probably having meetings going, this isn't a great look for the brand.
Starting point is 00:41:55 Do you remember Mike the situation from Jersey Shore? No, I don't know. Mike, the situation was this sort of... What's Jersey Shore? Jersey Shore was like Jewelty Shore, but in America. Right. That's where it started before Jewelty Shore. And it was a group of these sort of Italian-American,
Starting point is 00:42:12 groomed guys and girls that would go out, drinking and getting pulling women and stuff and Mike the situation would go I'm going out to an ad I'm going to pour some chicks and then to do his muscle like that and go and that's the situation because he was called Mike the situation that was his catcher he used to wear a brand I can't remember I think it might have been have a crombian fit I'm not sure but famously he used to wear it all the time on the show they paid him a sponsorship deal not to wear it incredible so I'm here I'll tell you what if you get paid to stop wearing them horrible baggy pants And you're getting...
Starting point is 00:42:45 Lovely pants. I'd be so jealous. I'd be gutted to stop wearing them because they're the best pants. I'd love a... I'd love a underpan't deal with under armour. Yeah. Just me on a big... Just tops off pants on Mark Wahlberg.
Starting point is 00:43:00 I'm big loose baggy pants for dads. Well, not not baggy, actually. Your son spells a baggy. Well, oh, I'd go and see... I didn't have to go. I went and saw my daughter's production of Matilda at school. Oh, yeah. So this is what it's, she was, it's a year three and year four.
Starting point is 00:43:18 It was an interesting slip, wasn't it? Yes, it was a horrible little slipperoon. However, it was because she wasn't acting in it. The year three sing, choir backup. The chorus. That's what they call it. And then there was a play going on. And it's really hard to sort of enjoy watching other people's children acting, Matilda.
Starting point is 00:43:39 Yeah, yeah. Because it's very hit and miss, isn't it? Yeah, it's very hit and miss. Because if you've got 30 people from your workplace to put on a production of Matilda, you might have a couple of budding actors or singers in that group. But you also... That should be the most annoying. Jeff from accounts was a child once.
Starting point is 00:43:57 Yeah, yeah. And if he's having to do, you know... It doesn't feel like it though, does it when you meet Jeff? It doesn't feel like he was ever a child. No, it always feels like he was 54 with his tie too short and his belly sticking out. But you sort of feel like, I do feel sorry for those kids that like then that's not there about... you know, they're not into that. Did you do school productions?
Starting point is 00:44:16 No, I did no drama at all. The only, the first time I stood on stage was to do my first gig when I was 23. Did you not do like a primary ones? Like, weren't you forced to do it a primary? I remember, I think I just sang in the chorus. Right. I wasn't really doing any acting.
Starting point is 00:44:34 I was too scared and nervous. And then at secondary school, I did, they did a form assembly where, Yeah, yeah, yeah. You had to, but I wasn't in any of the actual, like, shows or drama and music and stuff. No, I didn't even crop into my head that I could do something like that. No, no, not for me. That was my worst nightmare.
Starting point is 00:44:55 I remember a performance we did at secretary school. Yeah. Our music group, we had to, like, improvise, I think it was just a piece of music about the Second World War or something. Right. Oh, Jesus, tough gig. Yeah, tough gig, I. And we had like, oh, not improvised,
Starting point is 00:45:14 like go in groups. And then hit them marched into Poland. Yeah. Didda, bow, but I do. We had these bottles of water
Starting point is 00:45:25 and we would be like shaking them. Yeah. And then our piece of music involved us. We then all, there was like five of us. We all had to split into groups and do this. And then we had to do the aeroplane. Then we all came up with the idea of doing like
Starting point is 00:45:39 aeroplane sounds like overhead, Not the firing ones, but like, all that kind of stuff. Yeah. Over the water. And that was it, right? Yeah. And then we got asked to do it at a school concert
Starting point is 00:45:54 because it was the best one, right? Okay. So just you making noises about water and planes? Us doing water in the bottles and then doing the plane sounds, right? And then... And you're just stood up doing that? There's no dancing.
Starting point is 00:46:09 No, it's just this, right? So you're stood there going, and someone's shaking a bottle of water? We're all shaking the bottles of water, right? The whole class. You're like waves. The whole year, all six of you. No, no.
Starting point is 00:46:22 So it was the secondary school. I was 200 in my year at secondary school. Okay, sorry, sorry. Yeah, okay. So there was like a parents' concert or something, and we were one of the things. I'd obviously buried this deep inside because it only came back to me recently.
Starting point is 00:46:34 And then we started shaking the water. And it got to the airplane sounds. And no one wanted to, go first because it was too embarrassing. So no one did it. And then it missed the queue. And then it was like, well, someone's got to start these airplane sounds. But I don't know what the other people think.
Starting point is 00:46:54 I was like, there's no way I'm going to start. Because what if no one else joins in? Then I've just done an airplane sound on my own. So you just stood there for three minutes, shook the bottles of water. No one made an airplane sound and then we sat back down. I can I tell you what I thought was going to happen in that story you you you you at that point went no do you know what I'm going to do it
Starting point is 00:47:25 yeah no of course having a bit of confidence to go yeah maybe I can no you just stood there in silence and shaking water and then we all sat down could I say the music teacher afterwards was fucking livid oh he said where are the aeroplane sounds
Starting point is 00:47:44 That's the best bit. That's a bit you're here for. Such a weird thing to happen to me. I totally forgotten it. It happened then it just came into my head. Yeah, you have to delete those sort of memories, do you? They're not good for the soul. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:47:59 I don't know what I brought that up. It's fine. That's what podcast is about. It's this kind of shit. At Medcan, we know that life's greatest moments are built on a foundation of good health, from the big milestones to the quiet winds. That's why our annual health assessment
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Starting point is 00:49:09 so he was away three days? Yesterday. What you should do it last leg? Is that back then last thing? Yeah. Sorry, I must have missed it. This Friday just gone. it's the opposite Rob, I do zero promo for that. That's very much your sort of constant just that that can go. Well, the thing is, I think by now, if one knows what it is and it's on. That's exactly what I say.
Starting point is 00:49:28 Sometimes they'll go, could you do some promo for the last leg? I think, everyone's made up their mind. Yeah. No one is still to me. They either hate us or they like us. Fine. It's like saying to you,
Starting point is 00:49:39 could you do promo for eight out of ten cats as Canada? Of course not. Hi, we've got, um, right? We've got Alison Hammond on today doing some promo about this morning to Tell us all about the show, Alison. We know people know. Yeah. But Lou Beckett
Starting point is 00:49:54 and her book, which is called something of a default parent. What is it? Confections? Infections. Infections from a default parent. I said confessions. I was like, it can't be confessions.
Starting point is 00:50:09 Lessons. Lessons from a default parent. And Josh Whitakam's. Museum of Pop Culture. And Robin Romish. You've got to check it. You've just simply got to check out Rob and Romash because it's going to be big.
Starting point is 00:50:22 Eight out ten cats of Scandons back. I'm doing that at the moment. I know, yeah. I've got to go away for a couple of weeks, Josh. I know. You've got a new thing, haven't you? I've got a new thing I can't talk about yet, but I'm going... Because we've got a very busy period where I'm doing the London Palladium for two weeks.
Starting point is 00:50:36 Lose Brooks coming out. And then I've got other little bits and bobs. And then as soon as that's done, I've got to film my special, which is always quite stressful, filming your stand-up special. And then once that's done, I've only got like four or five days. Slept go dating's coming back, so I'm doing some of that. And then I go away for two weeks. I'm away from Lou and the kids for two weeks.
Starting point is 00:50:53 She's not ideal. Be fine, though. They're in school. I'm struggling with being away. So this is something, Rob. I was doing a corporate on Thursday. I did a corporate on Tuesday. Did you?
Starting point is 00:51:04 Haldon's Kitchens. I almost had a breakdown off the corporate on Thursday. I actually thought I really need a drink here. And I was like, whoa, I'm in a bad space. Oh, Josh. You can't drop that in at 49 minutes, mate. I didn't have a drink. I didn't have a drink.
Starting point is 00:51:22 No. What was you going to have? Well, probably the way it works would be 15 points, the way it used to work. Vom it on yourself, Garben? Enough to pass out. You have to be medically unconscious. Not dramatically unconscious. I'll have a good drink until I'm medically unconscious, so my brain doesn't think anymore.
Starting point is 00:51:46 Just one glass of wine, Rob. That's what I would have had. I've told me that before. I had that comedian when I came off stage once and he was recovering alcoholic but I didn't know and I said, oh, there's nothing like a taste of lageries or after a tough gig. He went, I wouldn't know, mate, I'm recovering alcoholic.
Starting point is 00:52:01 And I thought I'd say, you definitely would fucking know. You would know, yeah, he would. He would. You know too well, mate. No, but I was away for three days. So I was in London on Saturday, right? And this was one of those things where it was like. So you came up to you did the corporate
Starting point is 00:52:17 it, then you did this morning, then you did last leg, and then you were still in town on Saturday for something else. Yeah, because I got offered, like, my dream thing. I got to host my favourite radio show on Saturday evening, but it did mean I was in London for the day. I'm waiting for it. Yeah. What's your favourite radio show?
Starting point is 00:52:36 I was covering for Lisa Tarbuck. I love Lisa Tarbuck. Is she five till seven? She's six to eight. Six to eight. The opportunity to do it once in my life, because it's the best show on the radio. ever. Do you do her features then as well? Yeah, I love her. I love her so much. She is brilliant. She's brilliant. But I was like in London on Saturday on my own, missing my kids. And it was mad.
Starting point is 00:53:00 Like I was like, what am I doing here? I had to phone rise and I was like, God, I'm so selfish doing this. This is awful. And then I went out of wagammer's on my own. I thought he said it's going to have a wank. Then I went to a wank to feel better. A wanga mammas? You had a wager mummers on your own? Yeah. Sat on a bench on your own? Yeah, I had the window seat, which is a mistake, because people kept pointing at me.
Starting point is 00:53:30 Did people sit near you or did they leave you? Was it busy? It was really busy. That's why I went with the window seat. So you had strangers with you? Well, yeah, that bench looking out on the street in Soho. You'll know the wagamamas I'm talking about. So did you have to sit next to people who didn't know?
Starting point is 00:53:45 Did they talk to you? They didn't talk to me, no. I may have phones in. Sat on a bench alone looking at the window. I'm sitting at a bench on alone looking out of the window going, this is the dream. This is the dream I signed up for. Because we say stuff,
Starting point is 00:53:59 I'd never go on Big Brother or I'm a celebrity and just sort of be trapped in a TV world alone. Yeah. And then we just do that on a Saturday. But as opposed to one off, you know. But then the thing is, so, Josh, you're really good on the radio. You keep doing all this cover for Radio too. I couldn't do a full show.
Starting point is 00:54:15 I couldn't do it. So you just like to be in cover guy? I just couldn't do it with my lifestyle, I don't think. Too much, too many cigars and drink. No, in terms of like, just the age my kids are. Radio Devon? Or do Radio 2 from Radio Devon? Well, I would do that.
Starting point is 00:54:36 So if they offered you a show where you can record it live from a studio in Exeter? I don't know if Exeter's got the facilities, Rob. Paddy McGuinness does it up in Manchester? He does, doesn't he? Exit is a city? I can do the weather. You do the weather live from the Met Office. Sorry, I haven't done enough parenting because of that is what I was saying.
Starting point is 00:55:00 You've been away. Yes, right. Anyway, my daughter was off school. She was ill. Yeah, my daughter's a bit sniffly. We're going for a riding lesson again tonight, right? You and Rose? Well, we're both.
Starting point is 00:55:13 Because my son got on the horse. That was a joke about you to having sex. Oh, God. It's so. far away from reality that I couldn't even see the joke. So your son got put on holes as well? At the end of my daughter's lesson on last week, my son said, can I get on the horse?
Starting point is 00:55:31 And they put him on the horse. Yeah. They tried him. I couldn't fucking believe what was going on. Oh, really? And then he was like, I want a lesson next week. So now both of them are having a lesson tonight. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:55:43 I've been so deep out of my depth of this. I don't know if this is like... What's happening? have you been to the country for three weeks? Well, you've moved to the countryside and you're going to end up having a horse. I've not. We haven't got the room.
Starting point is 00:55:57 We haven't got a field. Oh yeah, because there's no stables near you in Exeter that you could have one in, then drive to 10 minutes away. I don't want a horse. Not many people have a horse because they've got a giant field in the back garden. Most people have them in stables and then drive there.
Starting point is 00:56:11 You've got a giant field. You haven't got a horse. It's not a giant field. It's actually too small for a horse because I tried to see if I could get a stable in there, I'm not allowed because it's too small to have livestock. So you were considering a horse? No, I was considering another shed.
Starting point is 00:56:29 Right, here we go. Hello, I'm Amber, a mum of one human and two bald of collies. Four years ago, I settled my small business as a dog walker, pets it, and a range of other services. Last year, I decided to take my passion for healthy dog treats and turn it into an extra part of my business. I make natural dog treat boxes and can customize boxes to suit each dog's dietary requirements or personal preferences. Each box is packed with love and I have a range of tissue paper, seasonal, birthday, etc., and love to sign each box with the dog's name.
Starting point is 00:57:04 I'm based in Wigan but also cover Bolton for my services and free local delivery. I offer UK-wide postal delivery too. I love that. I'm based in Wiggin, but also cover, I thought you couldn't say the North West. No, Bolton, explicitly Bolton. But I'm a town between Wigran and Bolton. No. Just Bolton.
Starting point is 00:57:23 I will drive through you to get to a job in Bolton but not involve you. My website is dojo dogs.com. Instagram, dojo. That's dojo. And the Facebook is Dojo Dogs Adventures. Thank you, Amber. Hi, I love the podcast. It was my favourite listening during the early days of parenthood with my now three-year-old.
Starting point is 00:57:45 And he's still saving my son-a-sonity as I figure out parenting newborns. Twins. Sounds like the, she's not as into it as she was, but fair enough. Just wondering, if you could do a small business shout out to my friend's tutoring business,
Starting point is 00:57:57 learn with lollipop. I've been lucky enough to work with Lauren and she truly is an exceptional teacher. I think I've got a, um, coal saw. It's really hurting. On the outside of your lip?
Starting point is 00:58:14 Yeah. I would get some Zavirax or whatever, the boots alternative is, adikala, and just put it on now, because you want to get it early before it evolves. Yeah, yeah. I've been lucky enough to work with Lauren
Starting point is 00:58:26 and she truly is an acceptable teacher who goes above and beyond. She's left the classroom and now specialises in EYFS, KS1 and KS2 tutoring, supporting children with phonics, reading, writing and maths, all tailored to each individual child using their passions and interests
Starting point is 00:58:44 to make learning fun and meaningful. Sessions are run from the lovely lollipop learning lounge, cabin based in Basildon, Essex. At Learn with Lollipop on social, thanks so much, Emily. Thanks, Emily. Thank you, Emily. I hope you haven't got a cold till, Josh.
Starting point is 00:58:59 I'll update you next week. Okay. Put it in the order of business, Michael. See you next week. When we're having our script meetings. Bye. Bye. Hello, parenting hell listeners.
Starting point is 00:59:19 Recognise that voice? Yes, it's Josh Whitickam here. I have got a new podcast. Josh Whitickam's Museum of pop culture. And I'm going to say it. I'm about 85% sure you're going to love it. Here are the reasons why. Number one, I'm confident if you're listening now, you don't hate me and possibly think I'm funny. Number two, I'm confident if you're listening now, you like podcasts. Number three, I'm confident if you're listening to me and Rob, you prefer pop culture to people talking about
Starting point is 00:59:50 things, let's be honest, boring things like history, economics or politics. I know I do, and that is why I made this podcast. I wanted a show that tells the stories I love from popular culture in the way other podcasts do for drier topics. See above. Basically, I wanted a podcast that realized Millie Vanilli were more interesting than Elizabeth I first. Join me as I give the definitive, or at least the funniest, takes on Mr. Blobby. When Ghost Watch convinced BBC viewers, ghosts were real, when a band burned a million pounds for a laugh. The Spice Girls, a truly catastrophic Spider-Man musical with music from You Two and David Haselhoff, Baywatch, and his part in the fall of the Berlin Wall. All of them are real, by the way.
Starting point is 01:00:29 Either you know what these things are and you're about to learn far more about them than you ever realized you wanted to or you don't, and you're about to be introduced to some of the maddest things in modern or ancient history. Stiff next will learn, lose next will laugh. New episodes available every Wednesday and Saturday. Perfect to fill those gaps between your weekly doses of parenting hell. So go on, you might as well listen, subscribe and follow wherever you get your podcast now. Museum of Pop Culture with me, Josh Whittaker, available everywhere from the 1st of January.

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