Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S9 EP10: Rose Hanson (The Return)

Episode Date: September 27, 2024

Back by popular demand, Rose is here for a 'right to reply' to anything and everything Josh has said on the podcast since she last appeared. And it's safe to say it's an absolute hall of fame of an episode... Follow @penrosetilbury on Instagram or www.penrosetilbury.com Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available free everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Follow us on instagram: @parentinghell  Join the mailing list to be first to hear about live show dates and tickets, Parenting Hell merch and any other exciting news... MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Willicombe. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping.

And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener, with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times where none of us know what we're doing. I'm Dave, and saving with TD Insurance made me feel like I scored my own jingle. With over 30 ways to save, nobody seems like Dave.

Save on home and auto like only you can at tdinurance.com slash ways to save. TD. Ready for you. Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with. Kira, can you say Rob Beckett? Rob Beckett. And can you say Josh Widicombe? What was that again?

Josh Widicombe. Joshiddicombe? What? What was that again? Josh Whiddicombe Josh Whiddicombe The mum sounds younger than the kid Hello, here's my three and a half year old Kira saying your names Found out I was pregnant on the second day of lockdown Second day of my GCSE So your podcast has been there alongside me throughout my whole parenting journey I turn 18 next week.

Keeping me company on lockdown walks and the last nights of breastfeeding. Re-listening through the whole back catalogue. It's like hearing it all again the first time as I can't remember them. Had my first night away from her to see you live in Birmingham last year. Respect. Got tickets to Rob in Torquay in January. Yeah, come on, the big one. And hopefully to see Josh in Exeter next year too. Respect. Don't know about hopefully, but this was sent. But yeah, tickets made up in the sale. Yeah, I can see when she sent it.

Are you calmer now that you, oh sorry, go on, when did she send it? Today, so she kind of. Oh, so they have been on sale. They have been on sale for 72 hours. She's hoping to see when Exeter. Are they still available at Exeter? I don't know, don't check. I'm going to look at your seating plan.

Well they won't be updated now. Exeter's got a roll date Rob, Exeter's got the roll date planned, so even if it sells out there's another roll date. She can go and exit. Roll date, this is an industry talk. A roll date, guys, if you're watching, a roll date is when you book a venue, you also pencil the venue for the day before so that if that one sells out, you can put the next one on sale straight away.

It's a roll date. Yeah. But it's a, not putting on the roll date is quite depressing. Oh yeah, yeah. We're gonna release those roll dates. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah both challenged pencils in our time. Yeah they'll say oh there's a pencil already on that date do you want me to challenge it? I'm like right, oh yes, but if you challenge it you sort of have to confirm it. Yeah so if you challenge you've got to do it and if you've got a pencil that gets

challenged you've got to decide there and then do I want the pencil. And then you could have potentially have challenged it when you're feeling a bit cocky and then you're playing to 20 people in a 300 because you'd sold 300 not before. Exactly, exactly. And your max sales was 340. So you should have just left them wanting more. Yes, exactly. And when you do a roll date, Rob, do you do this?

Because I'll do this if I play somewhere two nights in a row. We're going to be better than the idiots that came last night. Because obviously tonight, you guys are the ones that bought the tickets first, so I prefer you. Yeah, so you can always blame the other audience, can't you? Yeah, always blame the other audience. And turn up really late because you don't have to do a sound check.

Exactly. Anyway, who's our guest? A great guest. Excellent guest. I'd say, is it your favourite guest of all time? Yeah. Favourite person of all time? I'd hate to ruin it by giving away who it is. Your wife. Her right of reply. Enjoy it!

Rose, welcome back to the podcast. Oh, hi. Hi, this is the right of reply. Enjoy it! Rose, welcome back to the podcast. Oh, hi. This is the right of reply episode. Yep. We obviously talk about our lives and our wives and our kids a lot. Your lives and your wives. That's good. I'm off the cuff.

I like how official this is. I feel like I'm doing couples therapy. Also, I feel like... I feel nervous as hell. It's like I feel like I'm doing couples therapy. Also just like I feel like... I feel nervous as hell. It's like inviting me to like the like filmed round table episode. Rose, Rose, Rose. You wanted to do it face to face. It's easier face to face. So I can sit across from you.

So do you find this quite stressful? Are you comfortable? Do you feel okay? I'm just going to warn you that I'm quite premenstrual. Sure, okay. It's not great for me. He's already got it in the neck this morning. Okay, this is perfect for the show. Because I forgot my Invisalign,

but that is Josh's fault ultimately. So it's premenstrual, isn't there? And they're better, is there post? Does that, is that just- I mean, sure, it could be, yeah, add it in. But I just don't know if it, is it just, is that back to normal levels of- Listen, women, we have be, yeah, add it in. But I just don't know if it's just back to normal levels of...

Listen, women, we have hormones going on the whole time. Men, just the same one. And when does pre go to mid? Yeah, that's true. I didn't know that. That's true, yeah. So cut us some slack, guys. Okay, so you're pre-menstrual and...

Yeah, so I'm quite ragey. Yep, and you've been, well, dragged into central London early morning, face to face. It's quite stressful and hard doing doing a podcast isn't it? I mean, you know, this is... Cut you some slack early guys. I think you might be under pressure and say things you regret later on. Yeah, yeah, always. I mean I can be guaranteed to do that but... Okay Rose, we'll start with the same question. How many kids you got? What ages?

They are, they're three, she's nearly seven isn't she? So three and seven, should we say seven? No, I don't know. We'll say six because it's the answer. Six, she's six isn't she? Oh, okay. That's just a bit of fun. What did you say? Was that six because it's the answer? It's a bit of bants. I didn't feel like fun. It was until you gave it the wrong reaction Rob. Oh, so that's my fault see. Rose, we've got a list of things that you've logged through listening to the show where Josh has told stories that you may disagree with or there's another version of it. You've sent me this list. Do you want me to call them out in bullet points at random?

Yeah, it's been quite a long time since I last came on. Well, it's been quite a long time you've been at home, from what we've heard. We're starting with that, are we? No, no, I'm just saying that's something that I've gleaned from this, but you've been away, I don't know, is that one of your things you're wanting to address? Me, having a job? Hey, is your right to reply, I'm just asking the question. Yeah, me having a job.

It's fun having a job you enjoy though, isn't it? When you get to piss off for a while and stay in a hotel and yeah. Why, you look uncomfortable. No, that's fair. I would say though, in your defence Rose, and I think when we've sometimes recorded two or three episodes of The Bounce. Oh, you're always, I'm always away because it's on a Monday. Yeah, so you'd go away Monday, Tuesday. I would go away Monday, Tuesday and it's on a Monday. Yeah. So you'd go away Monday Tuesday.

I would go away Monday Tuesday and that's easier for childcare. So we'd go away Monday Tuesday and obviously whenever you record I'm away. Yes and sometimes we record three episodes on the bounce and then I will unfairly ask Josh again where Rosie is. So basically away for about a month but realistically. But there was a period where I was away a lot. But yeah, you know, you guys know what it's like. You're about to go on tour. You're threatening to. No, I am on tour. No, I know. A year. A year. Exactly. A year's time. Is there one thing that's on the top, off the top of your head

is the main thing that sort of irked you? I can go through this list later. I tell you the one thing. Oh God, that was quick. Yeah it is quick. I didn't finish my question. The one thing is the passive aggressive tea. It's the passive aggressive morning tea that gets brought up quite a lot. So that's not part of the podcast? Yeah I think it's on there somewhere but you often talk about how you have to get up in the morning and make me a tea and I just feel like, I mean, also I found, you know, that you stir tea with your fingers, which I wasn't really aware of. I don't stir tea with my fingers, that's not disgusting, is it?

That's not what I do. I don't know if I want him to make my tea anymore. You know there's a classic like milk in first water, that's all a bit of like, a bit of fun. I don't stir tea with my fingers, I dance the bag. What's dance the bag. What's dance the bag? So the bag...

You do do a little thing like that. It will always be poking up, like kind of... Yeah, you do this. It's a very iceberg-like, the tea. Yeah, like an iceberg, so it's more below the surface, then you just take the bit that's out, and then you dance it in, and then you put it in the... Yes, you make tea with your fingers.

No, I don't, yeah, but I don't stir the tea with my fingers. How's it stirring? The dancing bag. So you are stirring it with your fingers? No, stirring it with the bag. How is the bag moving? The bag's moving. Yeah, but then you could say how's the teaspoon moving? No, but you're not, yeah, but the teaspoon is in the...

The bag is operating the exact same, the bag is just taking the place of a teaspoon. Either don't make the tea and be like, do you know what? I don't want to make you a tea anymore. I don't want to make you a tea. That's fine. But you will make the tea and then bitch about it on the podcast that you've had to get up and make me a tea. So for a bit of background, Josh, every morning, from what I've gleaned, every morning, Josh will wake up and go downstairs first and make you a tea.

And myself. And him every morning that you'll have in bed. Yeah, but when you say... No, this is just what I've heard. No, there's nothing wrong with that. It's actually not that far from the truth. And I hate this because I do feel like I need a bit more sleep than you, but even if it is like 10 minutes. Yeah. So, but you just kind of got into the habit of you getting up and you're like, oh, I'll make the tea. And I always kind of say, are you sure?

And you say, yes. And I sometimes I make the tea and then you're like, oh, you're making the tea. It's such a big deal. Right. And so are you quite, are you angry making this tea? No, I'm not. I used to be, but I'm a much more chilled out guy these days. Yeah.

Yeah. So what's helped, so what's helped with you being more chilled about making the tea every morning do you think just have more chilled out? Easier than you know me. Yeah So you find it a bit annoying that the way he talks about the tea on the pop I think I just think either just do it with a good grace. Mm-hmm. Yeah Or don't okay, I'll stop. Yeah. That's fine. It felt like once your brain go, Oh God, I'm not gonna have to anymore. Well, there also is the fact that the cat comes in and sleeps on my back. Oh can I ask a question? How do you feel about him sleeping with the duvet over your head and he has a little fan?

So I mean we've been together for what 13 years now so we've found a way around it. Did you feel first time you saw that? Oh it's fucking weird Rob. It's not weird. I've got so many... It's cozy. Is it hot in here or am I just in a studio park? It's so hot.

I don't know why I'm wearing this. You know like at the start of the relationship you have just a lot, you take lots of photos of each other before you have kids? Yeah, of course. Or a pet. Yeah, a pet full of cats. I've just got quite a lot of pictures of like Josh's head looking like Mother Teresa because he has this whole routine where he tucks it and then a little bit of the face comes out.

But I don't know what the problem is. It is really mad. But there's no problem, it's just very strange behaviour. We kind of do like a duvet, there's no way that I could sleep like that. I get so hot and stressed. So hot and so stressed, so we've somehow worked it, so you, initially he would try and, and I'm like, I'm not. Oh, get you in as well.

He'd put my head down and I was like, I can't. I don't remember that. I don't remember that. Wow, hey, okay. I don't remember that. You tried to pop Rose's head down as well. I don't remember that. Wow, really? I don't remember that. You were like, and I was like, it's too, it's too, no.

It is quite weird. Normally the victim does have a better memory than the perpetrator. But I suppose that was a nice thing because if Josh loves it, he thought, oh Rose might have to cover her head. Every so often he's like, don't you like it? And I'm like, it's really hot. I don't get why people don't like it. It blows my mind that everyone's not doing it. It's so, but this is the man who gets tired

if he wears a beanie or headphones. So it's all part of like his sleep thing. It's all part of the sleep. So now if he covers his ears and head. He gets tired. Do you think the world's too much for you? What? Yeah.

No, I think that's related to the sleep thing. It is, yeah, definitely. So it reminds me of having the Devo over my head. That's why you get tired. What I'm saying is to do that, to relax, is like you're hiding. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, but isn't that what you want? Well, the world absolutely away. And then he thinks about being on a train and it's all. Yeah. You have to think about being on a train to go to sleep no I don't have it doesn't have to be enjoys it and how would you know that would you hear a little choo-choo under his breath while he's is there anything else off the top of your head before I go to the list I don't I mean probably we've got this quite passive aggressive really I

think the tea about lots of things. On the podcast, or generally? Just, I mean, on both. It's things like, I mean, maybe the driving has lessened now because I'm learning to drive. Although I can't talk about my driving lessons without Josh saying, have you booked your theory? I said I'm not gonna talk about that anymore

because you said me saying it was stopping you doing it. It was a little bit like, we had a bit of a standoff, and I'm sure everyone has standoffs where Josh, there was a couple of them but the main one was like sorting out that plate cupboard and the more that he badgered me to sort out the plate cupboard the more I wasn't going to do it so I'm that kind of person so the more you ask about something, the less likely I am to do it. So I've stopped asking you. Great. So the plate cover, it's a plate cover? I did actually do the plate cover. But on your own terms? But on my own terms. Thank you. Yeah. I can be a bit like that though, a bit like...

Can you? Yeah, we flew and then I've learned that you best to shut up because then... I just, I can't think of anything else that I would do to you like if you were learning something new or I just I don't think I would do that like oh well yeah but have you done this bit of it no no that's not what I mean I throw my my hand to the ring it's quite advisable to get the theory done early doors you are not the first person to but I like to do things my own way. Absolutely right. I like I will do it when I am good and ready. That's fine that's so fine. Have you put in for your actual test yet? No you can't. No you can't. And you've done your theory. Absolutely. Of course. Don't rush to get that done then. I'm just waiting for Russell to tell me that I'm ready, okay?

No, I am loving it though. He's learning to drive in London's hard though. Oh my god! It's so mad! It's like a constant hazard test the whole time. I can't tell you how, I'm learning to drive in East London, so I'm constantly driving to Westfield. And it's fucking mental.

Like, there are, like, you just, you have to know, like the first thing you've got to know how to get around a bus. Like that is like, there's just constant. Someone argued the theory. The theory might, yeah, yeah, yeah. Rose, Rose says she hasn't got round to it. Do you know what it is? Is that he thinks that I'm frightened of it, but actually it is.

I think the reason why I didn't initially learn to drive is that I just couldn't be bothered. It was such a like, you've got to revise. The last time I revised I was doing my GCSEs. I can't... We haven't yet have you, because you haven't put the theory. No, Alright. Oh fuck's sake. Well no, I get it though.

It's actually getting really hot now. It takes up time in your day when you've already got stuff going on. I know, I know. I don't want to do it. It's boring. You can do it on your phone. No, but the actual driving lessons. It's so boring.

Oh the driving lessons are nice. And also Rose, Josh will just drive anyway. No, because it's a school run. I know obviously, but for you this is stressful, but for Rose, why bother? If you can just drive, do you know what I mean? It's like, you would be more motivated if you could pass four rows, you'd do loads. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is absolutely your wheelhouse as well, where you're like, I've got something to revise, I'm going to do it. Like, I wouldn't enjoy the practical.

No, see, I like the practical, but it's the I'm not your way inclined where I'm like, I'm going to sit and revise. That is not my scene. It's not sit and revise. It's just chill out, have a tea on the bus because and then read all that boring stuff. Like, you just answer questions. You don't have to read it. You do on the app.

You have to like read it and tick it and like, oh. Well we won't ask anymore. Passive aggressive tea, passive aggressive theory test. Okay just passive aggressive. Talking about passive aggression, I'm back to standoffs. You talk about the plate cupboard standoff. The grill pan standoff. Oh yeah that went on for quite a long time didn't it.

What was the grill pan standoff? There was a grill pan in the sink. Yeah, Rose had cooked something on a grill pan, meat I think, and you a veggie. And you would refuse to clean it and see how long it would stay there for. Which actually now, Is Rose refusing to clean it?

It was, but now it feels quite reasonable on your part. So I don't really know why I've written it down. There must've been a reason! Why was your fault? You've got to put a reason next to your notes here. All you've done here is bring up something unconceded. Something that's my fault? Oh, I don't know. Yeah, maybe I should have just cleaned it. I've got, so FaceTimeing me in a restaurant.

I do remember that. That was, that was when I was, I was away in Cornwall and I think the kids were having a meltdown or someone was having a meltdown and you were like, Oh, I'll just FaceTime Rose. Yeah, that's a mistake. And I was like, I can't... It's taken this long also for us to even realise if either of us is away from the kids, don't FaceTime them. No. It's just a fucking night

It never makes it easier for the person who's at home No, and all the person that's away like you're then just like I think I might have been a bit drunk as well What? Not that I would ever do that when I was away. What, when you were in the list? Probably, yeah. No, but I think that's the thing. You guys have a drink in a restaurant? Yeah, you're right. That's a go down to the corner where you can get shit face on your own. No, but I think that's the thing. Are you glad to have a drink in a restaurant? Yeah, you're right. Let's go down to Cornwall for a week and get shitfaced on your own. Yeah, it's absolutely the only time I get to do it.

When you do partialists, do you reckon you'll be driving to Cornwall? Is that a Josh job? We've talked about this, haven't we? I think we'll split the driving. I quite like the driving on long distances. I don't mind it. I don't know. I tell you why it is, because I've spent so much of my life in passenger seats and cars. You want a bit of power. I like the power. You got the control. Yeah. Also it is being the person who's like doing the iPads, handing out like various packets of mini cheddars

and yeah that is quite annoying. I'd say driving's easier than passengering when you've got two kids. But you know what I almost feel like I need to learn to drive with like a tape of my children going. A tape, maybe just play it out. Why don't you take them on the test? Yeah, that should help shouldn't it? You sold the childcare. Strap them in the back.

Have a lesson. That happened on Thursday. I've never got done for speeding ever until I had kids and I'm driving along and they're shouting, I'm trying to sort an argument. You're just not focusing on the speed. It's bad really. Stirring my tea with his finger. We sort of discussed that.

We kind of covered that, didn't we? Yeah. Wedding prep. Oh yeah, you guys give me and Lou quite a lot of shit for like... I've been dragged in. You've been dragged in. Before we go on holiday or before there's a wedding,

there's a lot of things that we have to do. I'll stay on to task on this because that is when... Lou arrives on holiday, looks like a different woman. Might as well just go on with someone else. But would you prefer us just not to do any of it? Yep. Oh, for fuck's sake. I wouldn't...

Lou, I love Lou with no make-up. I've never... She always looks lovely but I'm like but I've never looked at Lou in my life ever and gone, can sort them fucking eyebrows out with. First thing's creeping round the house. I've noticed when she said I'm done badly and she goes, I ate her money to get it changed. Yeah but I think it's a bigger question isn't it about the patriarchy. Is it? Well it is like if like women are just being told that these are the

things that we have to do to kind of keep up and like you know we need to look young, we need to have eyebrows. Does Josh say that to you? No but you're part of the patriarchy aren't you? I'm not! Look at him, he's got his head in the back. I'm absolutely not! But the prep for stuff. I also think, let's be honest, who is doing most of the like kid prep for going on holiday? We should be allowed some of our own like eyelash tinting time nails, whatever, before we go away. I didn't say to Lou though, I say I will pack the bag for this holiday. She will not relinquish that responsibility.

I definitely would. But Lou will not relinquish that responsibility. I definitely would. But Lou will not relinquish that responsibility. I think there needs to be like maybe like a mini break or something where Lou and I just go, do you know what actually? I think you have a go because then it's the only way that you... Well I'm happy to do that. Yeah yeah I'm not, this isn't an attack, this is just a suggestion. But why don't you trust me with a full holiday? Why's he got to do his Britishie? Actually okay alright. I've got a warm up with a free in my word. So it's two or three views. Pack a bag for Tommy Field, always be coming out. Alright. I think I could pack for a holiday couldn't I? A little bag of all the medical stuff. A little bag? A little doctor bag. So before we go on holiday there's a point where Josh comes in, shorts, dresses, t-shirts, and he comes into me and he'll say can you'm not saying, tell me what to pack. Yeah.

I'm done. But then I'll go to Rose and I'll go, just name some things, cause maybe I've forgotten them. That's annoying. Yeah, cause I'm- And then it's still my shuffle. Cause I'm in the middle of doing packing.

No, it's not almost her fault. But I'm just like, I actually prefaced it, but I know this is annoying. But just name some things you think I might have forgotten. Right. Is that a fun game? I know it's a useful game. You've got like the game. I don't hate

Eleven books So many books Well, it's weird though cuz I talk about like the patriarch in old school generation yeah, I mean I was thinking about packing and stuff like that like My dad my mom would buy my dad's clothes. Like he wouldn't even go to a clothes shop. Absolutely wild, isn't it? And then would just leave the house and pick a bag up that's got all... No idea what he's wearing. No idea what he's wearing on holiday. That is so... I love that. But then you can do that. It's weird. And this isn't a thing we've tried to do gendered children, we haven't tried to do this, but you can buy clothes for my son, but you can't buy clothes for my daughter, she has to have a say in what she wears.

That's maybe an age thing though. He's so young still isn't he? He's becoming a little bit more opinionated, but you're pretty like, yeah you can, but from his age she was like, I mean, she basically wore the same dress for about three years because she would not. Oh, right. I couldn't put her in anything. She likes that dress, yeah. Absolutely, like, it was one of those things I really had to let go of,

as like, you kind of have in your mind, you're like, oh, I'm gonna put her in this really nice outfit and these shoes, and she was just like, I'm having none of it. I'm gonna wear that Sarah and Duck Knightie for at least two years and wellies. On one holiday my oldest wore the same pajama top to dinner seven nights in a row. Yeah.

And it's more like your own E-Guys apparent because you have the idea of, oh I want to wear this outfit on Monday. Yeah. This isn't a belt but they're not a doll. And actually it's a good thing to let go of because they are their own person is good that they like make now she like loves You know pick our outfits because if you push to it on them too much They won't do it like a theory test a plate cover You know But the other thing is the other way is if you tell me to do something I do it for fear of

Being what I don't know I'm too far the other way. I'll do anything to avoid confrontation. Sounds like a kink, these two. Oh, God. Rose ignores everything you say, and you do it like... No, this is not good, is it? But do you know what our friend Lucy,

who we saw on Saturday said, and I just thought that's so... Yeah, this really rings true. She's... Because I've got half of them sisters, but they didn't grow up in the same house to me so I basically was an only child. And she said that she does anything to avoid confrontation because she was an only child and didn't have siblings.

She basically didn't have an argument for the first 18 years of her life. Yeah but when you say that, you and I were brought up exactly the same so what's my issue? Because you and your mum would have been arguing from day one. Yeah, it was a house full of women So we were always just tell Rob what your mum did when you didn't wash up. This is a oh, yeah So if I mean I was old enough to to be to be like to know better I was living with my mom and you know I'd made dinner or something and I my mom had asked me so many times to I don't even think it was wash up I think

it was just put the pans in the dishwasher so my mom put them in my bed I think fair play on my mom like yeah too fucking right like I was living in a house I should have probably moved out. How old were you? Probably about 19. Oh right. Yeah, get the pants in the bed. How long were you in the bed with the pants on? I will not be forced into this. Yeah, then it became a standoff.

She'll want pasture at some point. Josh addressing emails to school with hi mate. Oh my god. Now this is awful, terrible. I think that's fine. Just say dear Sarah Madden or even hello Doctor. Hello Mister whatever. Hi mate.

I mean our school is quite relaxed but I think that's too relaxed. They are my mates. I use mate when I'm playing five-side football when there's a 43 year old man I've never met before but he's playing on my team. I think that is the right mate to the team. I did it the other day actually. Oh my god you call quite a few people mate. How do they reply with? All right pal I don't know what they reply with. They just say hello thanks Mr. Whiddaker. No they wouldn't say Mr. Whiddaker. Oh no, no one got, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, You've got hi Josh and he ended it with cheers which I think shows with pal in around.

I think mate is a strange thing to say to teachers. I just think mate to teachers is weird and also our daughter gets so fucked off with you if you call her mate. So how would you if you had to... But that's because I've... You're doing it in a... Originally whenever I say mate it's because I'm a bit exasperated. Mate. Like that.

Do you say you call Rose mate? No. No. We don't call each other anything. Yeah. And then when I use her name. It's really weird. It's really weird. We don't call each other anything. Well we'd never say Josh or Rose. So how do you communicate? So I feel like when he says Rose I feel like I'm being told off. So I'm like alright Josh. Yeah but. I don't know Rob. But you must. No I don't think you should say hello. I bet you don't say Lou. Lou? Do you?

If I'm calling for it then. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If I was calling for it. Oi! Oi! Yeah, no, no, no. I thought you were implying you don't. No, no, if I was calling.

Josh, there's someone at the door. I don't think we'd even do it then. We'd just go straight into, we'd just go straight into there's someone at the door. Right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you don't like to say each other's names? No, it's not. We don't like it. You just never do. We just go straight into, we just go straight into there's someone at the door. Right. Really? Yeah. Yeah.

So you don't like to say each other's names? No it's not, we don't like it. You just never do? We just don't. I think also when you're, you know... If you're introducing each other to people. This is the father of my children. I just think we're just at that point as well, you know where you feel like,

especially after the summer holidays where you feel like you've just essentially just been running some kind of like holiday camp yeah yeah you've not like you I was you were talking about like not being able to finish a conversation that is the main thing isn't it you're just like the exasperation of not even just being can you just let me finish saying something to daddy I think that's it the daddy yeah you're saying mommy and daddy yeah your children yeah like I'm just trying to talk to daddy. So I don't... Let me just finish. I just finished. So I don't... Yeah we don't. Because I do feel like if you say Rose like I'm about to get a bollocking for something. So... Rose. Rose.

You know like when a parent uses the full name of their child. Full name yeah? Yeah. Yeah. That's weird. So if you were in Manning's school about something, say that she was having problems at school your daughter. Hi mate! No I wouldn't do it unless it's true.

Hi mate, I'm just talking about the dog shit that's wrapped in her head. No I wouldn't do that. She goes, hi mate, obviously her head was vomited on by a couple of students. Hi mate, we've just come out of the hospital after the assault. Just wondering if you're going to chat to the parents. No way mate. Is that right? Yeah, cool. Cheers. Dinner up there, just kids out there.

I might just, I might do it in that situation, try and defuse it. But it's usually, you know, can she, she hasn't got the right training. It's not, you know, it's not. Yeah, it's not a serious thing. Yeah. Yeah. I've got the toothpaste. I'm the one with the sensitive teeth.

Oh, so- What's happening? I don't remember this. You kept getting cross that I would take the toothpaste to Cornwall. Yeah. And like, you had, you also in your sponge bag, you have toothpaste.

That's a thing, isn't it? A wash bag. A wash bag, sorry, a sponge bag. That's what you fucking, that sounds like a slur, you fucking sponge bag. So what we call each bag, sorry, a sponge bag. Absolutely fucking, that sounds like a slur you fucking sponge bag. So what we call each other, she calls you sponge bag. Sponge bag. You wash bag.

Wash bag and sponge bag we call each other. Do people not say sponge bag? No. No. Have you been using that forever? Yes. Well now listen let us know in the comments, do you use sponge bag? Sponge bag.

Have a sponge baggers. You don't even have a sponge. I don't have a sponge. Michael, sponge bag, you have a sponge bag? He said sponge bag. Okay well in his sponge bag as you don't even have a sponge Okay, well in his sponge bag You've got toothpaste because you've like I don't know you with your like millions of Shaving foam that you're always buying as well But the the sensor dine I need to take it because I'm the one who has sensitive teeth So you don't have sensitive teeth

So you could use So do you have a sponge bag that's ready to go because you work away from home a lot? Yeah, so I've got a Sposh bag sponge bag in the squash bag. I've got a bag of toiletries That's in like the cupboard so that when I go away, I grab that. You can take that. So you've got a reserve. Yes, because-

But would you put anything else in it? So for instance, if you've got a second toothbrush in there or- Yes, but if I'm going to wait for a long time, I'll take my electric one. If it's one night, I'll just use the- Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what I'd suggest is, what's happening here is you both need a couple of sponge bags that are stopped. Yeah. So that the main stock level stays. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what I'd suggest is, what's happening here is you both need a couple of sponge bags that are stopped.

Yeah. So the main stock level stays. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So next time you go with boots, you need a triple. I don't, I unpack my sponge bag. I tell you what, Josh and I are really bad at, like a general, like a big shop. We're supposed to visit Terrible at it.

Yeah. Like when- It's like the government. No, but we, no, but- It's just kind of the time for it. When do you do it? When do you do it? Oh no, I'm bad at doing it, but if I do it, I nail it. Yeah. Like when... No but we... When do you do it? Oh no I'm bad at doing it but if I do it I nail it. Do you? I think so. Get some frozen pizzas. Would you buy extra toothpaste? No but just go to the chemist for that. Well there you go like that's the... you just got to do it all in one go.

Maybe because Rose is going away and also you know, Rose has given birth to two children, she's getting back into her career and starting a business and it's all new to her, you can maybe go, do you know what, I remember when I first started working away a lot, when Rose had the kids, I would have my sponge back. And maybe I could go down to the chemist and I could triple buy and stock two sponge bags

and go hey Rose, the toothpaste going, here's a little sponge bag for you. Take that to Cornwall. Yeah, okay, I could do that. I could do that. But I would only know the key items. Yeah, you'd be all at sea if I started talking to you about serums. Yeah.

Oh, I don't go and sit in a coffee shop. I think this is from where you go out every morning to buy a coffee. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I just want to clarify that it's not me fucking off every morning and sitting and having like a half hour coffee. I can understand to some people this probably does seem unreasonable.

Right, okay. Um. I feel like you're on news night and you've been castled. Can you just go and get the coffee? Honestly, it wouldn't surprise me. The coffee shop is I would say a maximum 3 minute walk from our house. Yeah, if that.

Yeah, so every morning, and I do check, I'm like, is now a good time for me to just nip out and get my coffee and then I come back with it. Would this be when the kids are getting ready for school? Yeah, but they're probably eating breakfast. No, I'm just asking, just a question. I told you I'm pre-menstrual okay so there's an edge. But this will be when they've got the food so you know there's that long period. Yeah yeah yeah so there's a point where I'm like okay everyone's good, I'm gonna nip out

and get it. But I do think... And you haven't finished the tea that Josh made for you up to the bed? That's long gone, that's long gone. I've let the cat get off my back, you know, we're all I'm ready to start the day I get my coffee. Does this cat stay on your back all night? No, she might move down to the end of the bed, but then in the morning when she's hungry She'll get on the back. Well, she won't, she'll come downstairs with me. Well, because she knows you're gonna feed her Yeah, so she's not on your back when the tea's happening anyway so we're getting bogged down by the details you're getting popped out if you pop out and get a coffee while the kids are having some breakfast yeah although I have realized that something this we might need to get

a coffee machine I mean economically that timing wise I'd suggest it's a good shout but yeah when Josh is away and because he's been away quite a bit recently and obviously with the tour coming up, just trying to get, even though it's only across the road, and I need that coffee, I can't tell you, like I look forward to that coffee so much the next day, like it is the thing that I'm like, oh I can't wait for that coffee. And I don't really need it. It is, it is an addiction. And if you're going to have advice, it's a good one.

Great one. One little coffee every morning. I don't really need a second one that really sends me into like anxiety levels. So I look forward to it, but when you're on your own and you've got two kids and you're from the get go, you're like, guys, can we get your clothes on so I can go out for my coffee Beans that they have in bulk You know what we got a coffee machine in Cornwall and I finally like shout out to Lucy for like Helping me because for a while I was like I can't get this fucking thing working

Lucy Our friend she came to stay and she used to be a barista. So she was like, I can show you what to do. Before then I was like, I don't understand it and just getting really cross with it. Because you need your coffee to work. I know. But now, and now I kind of trust in it. I'm like, okay, maybe it will change your life. I know, right. But I think for ages, I remember you saying to you like, I could get you a coffee machine I'm like no but now actually so you don't drink it in there you get it and walk straight back

I get it and walk straight back and then do you have to I was under the impression of Josh that you have to sit and drink this coffee and not be disturbed at that point and that's your Maybe at weekends Ring fence time Not during school hour runs I wouldn't go. But there are things that both, we both have, I think in the mornings that maybe,

like it's, you know, it's self care. Like you like to go and meditate. And I like to, my version of that is I like to sit and have a coffee. But I think that kind of stuff goes out of the window during the week, but maybe the weekend. You're quite lucky you've got quite a late drop-off time which helps because early on that's when it gets... Yeah you can't be going I'm gonna go and but I am there I know what time the coffee shop opens I'm like ready but I do think it

could be time and I love everyone who works there. I think that you've explained it. You could still go to the coffee shop with a coffee machine just for the days when you can't get there. You can still go to the coffee shop. Because of the stress when you're not there. Oh, she wants to get an air fryer because of you as well. Oh yeah, when you started talking about the Mega Zone, doing a chicken breast, I was like, Josh, I think he needs an air fryer. It's just so quick, especially with the kids, some fish fingers on nuggets.

That's what everyone says. The minute you talk about air fryer to parents, they're like, it does a fish finger in seven minutes. That is the stock phrase. It's so quick, because it's such a smaller area to get hot. An oven, you've got to have one for a week. And they stick, don't they? And then you have to pull it open. It's a little drawer.

It's not getting a spoon out. They are big, aren't they? They're big. Where do you put it? I use it a lot during the week. For example, I got in late from a gig at 11, I was a bit wired and there was loads of chicken breast going out of date the next day. Just get them in the mega zone.

Just stack them in the mega zone, little bit of jerk seasoning, bosh, straight in the fridge, you've got chicken on the go. Oh so you prepared it for another day? Oh that is good. And it's so easy because you can just do loads at once and it's sort of, I don't know why, it's just so much more simple. Any air fryer companies out there? No.

I'm sure you've got 80 quid for Ninja. How much is an air fryer? Well I don't think they're that expensive, you can go up there ones that do way more than you need to do, but like, I don't know, but like 50 to 100 quid, depending on what you want. You've just got to find a spot for them haven't you, because they are quite big. You just got to find a spot for them haven't you because they are quite big. Right any other little bits and bobs? I've got, shall I reel off a couple you can stop me? Yeah yeah go for it.

Might be better. Because some of them are quite short probably. Train seat, who booked the holiday? Seems quite angry. So that is when you get pissed off at me for asking you to put my bag up. Like I'll go and get the seat and then I'm like can you just put my my bag up like I'll go and get the seat and then I'm like can you just put my bag up and you get I don't get pissed off well you got annoyed enough to bring it up on the podcast did I yeah

well I haven't invented this desperate for content or letting the truth sneak out because you're under pressure for content so yeah I feel like why Why would I invent something if there's an actual Andrew Anderson outfit? We're all married, mate, we've got a list of them. So yeah, I feel like that's my prerogative, because I've booked the train. You've booked the train? I didn't know that was the deal. You could, I packed the bag. I bought the outfits. Also, there are still some weird sort of gender split jobs, right?

One is lifting heavy bags, right? Oh no, that is my job. Well way yeah but that so so when there's a situation like moving a wardrobe you're called in no but it's still the delivery guys will always go to Josh yeah and then and sometimes I'm like out of desperation yeah I'll just let you take that but there are some times like when me and your dad lugged the peloton around yeah that was some I wasn't there and then did you move an exercise bike after that? Yeah, the exercise bike. Nobody messes. Because you've got here the cabin bed delivery. Was that a similar

case of that? I think that was also like... There was a guy that did it. Yeah, but there was a whole thing about the... it was another one of those, oh, you've got all these things delivered for when you're not here. Yeah, yeah, that was. And actually, with these things, it's not that I do it. I never go, oh, there's a day when I'm not here. I'll get it delivered then. It's just when it can come. It's just when it can come. So he's looking for that.

You're looking for, his own ego of like, poor me, poor me, he's looking for that. The bed arrives and there's nothing, and there was a whole like, I'm gonna. That narcissism, cause the thing with the ego is the biggest loser always wins. Isn't that right, Joe? Ha ha ha.

In the battle of egos, yeah. That yeah. So that's just an unfortunate timing. I think it's like when you're... Someone's got to be in haven't they? Someone has got to be in. Yeah. And I know that was a long time ago. It was I know but it's good to revisit isn't it? Yeah it doesn't mean it's not true or annoying for Rose. I had stilettos on, snowy walk. Oh, when we went, we got you, when we went away, this was last year, and you were really pissed off because you wanted to go outside and walk in the snow and I was like ruining the moment or something. And the reason why... Oh, I didn't get pissed off.

Was that at the hotel? Yeah, I didn't get pissed off. Lovely hotel, lovely snowy walk. And you wouldn't go for a walk? And I wouldn't go for a walk, but I had... Because I was a bit like, why wouldn't Rose want to go for a walk in the snow? It must be beautiful. But he didn't tell me you had stilettos on. I had stilettos on so I'm not going to go and walk in the snow.

What a bastard. I don't seem to remember that. It's alright, I did. The person that you've thrown under the bus to nearly a million listeners every week remembers. This is correct. Because people come up to Rose and go, Rose, why are you away? Why the fuck did you walk in the snow? What's going on with the toothpaste?

What's your problem with snow, Rose? Why are you such an asshole and you won't walk in the snow? Listening to you slag me off while I wrap your presents. Oh yeah, there was a particular episode around Christmas. I can't control when you're listening to me. I don't know. It was really... Like, you guys are, you know, it's pretty... What's the word? Restrained.

But there was a particular episode, I think, around Christmas, where I was like, this is unbelievable. And I was sitting there, wrapping your gifts, listening to you, like, tear me a new one. And I was like, oh, this is going down on the list, isn't it? But, I mean, I can't remember what you new one and I was like oh this is going down on the list isn't it but I mean I can't remember what you said but I was really annoyed it was just the the the fact that I was wrapping your presents yeah yeah fair enough but that's it's difficult for me to control when you listen yeah I'll put

it down as roses for sure oh the queue at Dear England this was when there was a massive queue and you tried to jump the queue or you didn't want to jump the queue. We didn't jump the queue. Was you offered to jump the queue? No, we did jump the queue. We joined the queue. This is the difference between Josh and I basically. We joined the queue.

A queue for the theatre where it's not like you're getting on a plane and you're looting, everyone's getting in their seats. It's a bit of a bum fight, the theatre queue sometimes, where people come from all different angles. So we joined where we thought it was the end of the queue and then I didn't even notice that some people would get, someone got a bit uppity behind us and I hadn't really clocked but Josh was like, oh my god, we've joined the queue at the wrong point, we should go to the back of the queue. Well we jumped the queue.

Yeah but we didn't know, we should go to the back of the queue. And we did by then. Yeah but who cares? Who gives a shit? Did you say oh sorry we thought the queue is this not what the queue started? Did you say that? It's just like we're all gonna go in at one point like it's not like we're outside like oh my god like we're never gonna get let in like they're literally there at some point the doors open everyone goes in and sits down like this is how angry rose get yeah and i'm like do you do you fucking think that like no one cares like no one cares it's one but then that's my attitude i'm like bad service at restaurant who complains who do you think we at the beginning actually i don't think i would complain about service but i like the Oh, like the, yeah.

I get quite annoyed by where I've been sat. And that when we first started in our relationship, I hate that. We literally couldn't go out on date nights because he would get so anxious about where our table would be in the restaurant because I'm like, if they try and put me in a bad table, I'm not going to sit there. Like I'll ask to be moved. So you're going in with your backup. Yeah, it's a great way to start. Before you even see the table. I've

worked on it. So what do you think that is though? What is that? You feel like you're being done by? Yeah and I think it's that feeling of like oh they can go in there we'll put them in there and I'm like no you won't I'm not going there next to the bathroom I want a better table and that's it it's more about me that stuff. What do you think that is about? Oh I what is that? Oh fuck. What is that about? I Don't know don't like people. I don't know. What do you think it's about? Well, it's probably too deep to go into He knows what it's I don't because obviously if you're in in a restaurant they're gonna try and fill

the shitty tables because they have to. So they're probably gonna look at, if you've booked they'll go, okay we'll try and get them in that bad table. I've never thought about it. Have you not? Oh my god. It's never in my life. It hasn't come up in my head.

I don't think I could go into a restaurant and tell you what the good and the bad tables are. No! I could be sat at a table and go, oh it's a bit drafty, we was on holiday and there was this restaurant where they had like these are higher tables with high stools and I don't like the hits in the stall. So I went oh it was sat there and I was a bit uncomfortable and I would say oh can we sit anywhere else is that alright? And then if there was actually no- If you were to ask they'll probably make it work for you.

Yeah they do don't they? Oh yeah they would have been yeah but- Oh man I think I'm gonna get really slagged for this, aren't I? No, no, I don't think... No, but I think, you know, but if you're not, you're not going in there and going, give me a good table, you'll just go, oh, we've got a table too, and then when they take it, oh, where is the table?

Yeah, it's to me, it's fine. I know, that's what I said. It's such a polite... It's me that she's only polite to, she'll be furious, and then they'll come over and then she'll be really nice to them. I don't think I do this anymore, but they're... so I think I've worked on it a lot, but I would... what I would do is that we would go out, we'd get put in a table and my back would get up and I'd be like, oh, I hate this table. I couldn't... I was really anxious,

I think. I've worked on that, but. So I would be really fucked off about it, and I'd be stewing about this shit table. And poor Josh is sat there like, oh god, she's having a bad time. And he would say to me, do you want it, shall we just see if we can move? Instead of me just going, yeah, do you know what, I'm gonna ask them and see.

Yeah, and they'd normally sort it out. Yeah, I'd go, no, I'm fine. And then I would try, I'd try and be like, I'm fine with that, I'm fine with that, I'm fine with it. And I wasn't fine with it. And he's having a terrible time and I'm having a terrible time. So just now, sometimes I will just be like, just let it go. Like, who gives a fuck? And it works.

But sometimes I'm like, I don't want to be sat next to the toilet door. Please, can we move? And they will move me. Yeah, exactly. Or if they take me, I'm like, oh, want to be sat next to the toilet door please can we move and they will move me yeah exactly or if they take me I'm like oh are we okay to sit there yeah and they'll go oh yeah okay that's fine yeah so yeah but I yeah I know and different reasons but yeah I think I'm I think I'm a bit better at it now but yeah I don't want anyone to psychoanalyse me on that. No DMs please. If you do know what's going on, don't let me know. I'm quite happy just cracking up.

Just let me have my table. I'm working out in my own good time. I'm quite like just being tucked away in a corner now. I don't mind that. By the toilet. I'm not going to get into the list. Go give us the list. I don't think there will be Oh, I'm not going to go into the list, but there's just... Go, give us the list. I don't think there'll be a lot of people that agree.

Someone who's not involved in this, obviously you're a little bit more sensitive to it. I totally get one in the Decent Table. What you said you should go... I reckon Michael's with me. Oh, I'm 100% with Rose. Right, okay. But Michael's... No, I'm not against this at all, Rose. I think a lot of people will agree.

And also, you're internalising it. You're not shouting and hollering at staff. No, I'm just making him pay for it. She's not internalizing it, she's hitting me. And he has five pints and he's sick on the table, you're always angry. What's on your list of bad seat tables at the moment? I can tell you through. You do it, you do it. Front door, front door next to that, because it's always open.

Yeah, I agree with that. And then toilets. Yeah, I agree with that. And then toilets. There's one more. Service room. Or like a secondary room. Oh, do not put me in a secondary room. I don't want to go in a back room. If I'm in a back room, I'm out.

I tried to book a restaurant for his birthday and I, because a lot of these places you specify, Yeah, just say the table there. can we go in the front of the restaurant and the one was like oh I'm sorry we can't guarantee that so I was like okay thanks I don't want it that's fine though I think it's I think it's a fair point and now you I went oh yeah I do hate all those things too there you go it was at the pub the other day and I was right by the thing where they put the order. I hate that. It's quite stressful. Yeah, and I you know She likes

No, we don't say the name Rose likes to dine at the bar. Oh, I love it Depends on the restaurant. Yeah When you're in like Spain and it's like a little tapas if absolutely propped up, smashing canyons like no more of them. Oh what's that? Oh look what he's doing now. When we was in Seville with our friends it was all like giddy we found an amazing place to food and drink. Everyone was happy on this little corner bar like that and the food was outrageous like that and then weed these um this like this um

chorizo bocadillo thing right now we're eating it like that and then uh my mate he's a bit drunk he went oh look at that ham on the iberica oh let's get one of them on you're eating it went oh yes no I think you're right about that Rose but I can see why if you you're if you're letting it get to you too much. I think if it's bleeding out to your partner, that's when you need to... How did you feel about that then at the time? Oh, you hated it didn't you?

Yeah. Because I didn't know it was a thing. So I'd get stressed because imagine walking into a room and having no knowledge whether something was right or wrong. So I don't know what the variables are so I try to read it. You're not trying to play the stock market. I do, do you remember though, you might not, maybe you do remember this but for a nan of

a, because you know, it won't surprise you that I'm a slight control freak. I do a lot, but you know like we do things in the relationship so I book a lot of the restaurants, I book the holidays, I like to do that stuff because I enjoy it and I like researching it but for one... And I like to do the tax. Yeah, yeah. Thank god because I'm terrible at that. There was one anniversary where I let you go rogue. Was there? Yeah. Oh, hello. Early doors, Free kids. And to be fair you bought, we went to the Oxo Tower, you booked the Oxo Tower and you don't remember. Is this a

euphemism or is it? Was it the Oxo? No, was that? Centre point. That was it, centre point. Again is it a number? Are you ever talking about having sex here or is this a restaurant? Oh my gosh. And then when we got in we are such an asshole. When we got in we were like there's obviously lots of tables that are right by the window because it's all about the view. Yeah of course. I mean weren't in one of those. Yeah. And I wasn't happy about it. And because he didn't request by the window. No. And I probably said that to him as well. Yeah. Did you request by the window? Yeah. And he was like, yes, have you sorted out the plate cupboard? We also had a standoff about framing as well. Do you remember?

I mean, this is stuff that you have before kids, right? That now you're like, we had like a stack of things that needed framing. Getting such frames stressful. Either about a thousand pounds, this annoying place that takes six months or the weirdest old man you've ever seen. And he puts it in like a window. Like a I know, I know. There's nothing in between. Like a widow's hallway. So stressful. Yeah. So stressful. There's nothing in between. But yeah. And then he doesn't get hung up for another six months.

Yeah. Did it when you obviously when Jeff started being more well known for doing the telly and stuff like that, did that make going for dinner even more stressful? Because if you are being annoyed about a table, that was a pre-existing thing that annoyed you. and it makes him who doesn't even care look like a diva. So this is the problem with the, we're going back to the Gara Southgate queue. Yeah. He was worried that people would be like, oh my God, Josh Widdicombe pushes in. Yeah.

And I was like... I don't see myself in that way. Okay. No, you've got to be a sum of self awareness so people know who you are. I know, it's true. But then I am like... I know, I know, I know I'm a big deal. But I do, you know, respect that there is, if I get uppity about something then you don't want it to reflect on you and that's fair enough but equally, you know, I just really get everyone's got that relationship Lou will always ask me where the toilets are

wherever we are even if it's the first time I've been there but we can literally land in Morocco get in a taxi arrive at the hotel we'll be sitting there waiting to go to Rob's toilet so I love that but she doesn't want to ask the favor tank oh yeah are you happy about the favor tank do you feel what the levels are at the moment of the favor tank I mean I didn't realize it But she doesn't want to ask. The favour tank? Oh yeah. Dot, dot, dot. Are you happy about the favour tank? What do you think the levels are at the moment of the favour tank? I mean I didn't realise it was kind of a thing but I quite enjoy it actually, the favour tank.

But we're kind of equal now, it's like one of you goes away, the other one goes away. So if you go away for a stag do you go away, why don't you go away with your friends? You're like blocking it up. Well I suppose the interesting thing is what counts in the favour time. Yeah. I.e. does me going to work in Paris for two weeks count in the favour time? I'm not saying like... Not a direct comparison, so I'd say that is sort of like that percentage where that should

equate to a weekend away, not ten nights in Paris for Rose. Yeah. What do you think it should equate to anything weekend away, not 10 nights in Paris for Rose. Yeah. What do you think it should equate to anything? I do, yeah. I think if you've been away from home and the kids for 10 days and let Rose with the kids, I think Rose could do a couple of nights or a night away to restock her levels while you look after the kids. Yeah, I'm good with that.

Yeah, I think that it's probably. 10 days in Paris alone, I think would be a bit much for you, Rose. Oh, God. Oh, it'd be wonderful, wouldn't it? No, but it's probably... 10 days in Paris alone I think would be a bit much for you Rose. Oh God, I'd be wonderful wouldn't it? No, it's one extreme swap. What do you like, how much favour is there? But you have to go away for the weekend with Adam Hill. How much favour is there? And two guests from the UK comedy circuit.

Josh Pugh! Josh Pugh and Rose Elegales. AJ and Doodoo. I tell you what, shout out to Judy Love though because she basically like when we were at the EuroStar trying to like there was a whole nightmare trying to like get through. Oh get her back with the kids.

Oh my god and she was there and she was just like always checking in. She was coming back from filming. She was like, do you need a hand? Are you alright right? And I was at my like, like stress point. And you know, when you then meet somebody you suddenly have to be like, oh, I'm not an asshole. I'm really nice. She's proper like a mom as well, Judy.

Yeah, yeah, she was so lovely. So thank God for Judy love, like keep checking in. You get quite a lot of travel anxiety. That's something you find. Yeah, I- Going through customs. Yeah, but with two kids on your own something you find. Yeah, I... Going through customs. Once I'm through... On your own is hard work.

Yeah. Oh no, even... General, you find customs is a thing that stresses you. I think it's because you've got a permanent bracelet. No. I can hear the jewellery clinking and clinking. Rose has got a bracelet that doesn't come off, every time she goes to the customer she gets taken aside. How does that come off? What is it like?

Well it doesn't because... How did you get it on? I can't remember. It was... So it's not one that's been like soldered on? Soldered? No, so there's two that can't come off but basically I will know if airport security isn't working because if I don't beep then... So I've been to a couple of places where I walk. So now that stresses you out. No it doesn't. I think actually I think this is another thing that I'm a bit I think you still think I'm really stressy about it but I'm actually not as bad as I used to be but my my travel anxiety was like

was really bad but over like really small things like my anxiety would always come out in things like, oh but are we going to like, how am I going to get the suitcases all into the car? Like you know when you're focusing on the smaller things rather than like, oh we've got to get on a plane and go in the air. Like it's all that like tiny, it's probably a bit about like Lou asking where the toilet is. I used to have, I would rather, I think I'm better at this now but I would rather just need a piss really badly than go into a pub and ask to go to the toilet. That for me is like oh my god I can't do that. I can piss and shit anyway. No I'd be so... Now if you said I'm a shit now I could do it on the spot. Do you ask if you walk into a pub? What? If you're not in a pub and you walk past and you need a piss do you just walk in or do you ask?

I walk in super confidently if it's busy. Yeah yeah. If it's quiet I go can I use your toilet please? I think I'm better at it now and obviously when you have kids is where you just have to, you just gotta let that go. Well you could always go I'm pregnant can I use your toilet? Yeah yeah yeah just use that line. I'm pregnant can I use your toilet? But I think it's a bit more manageable but now we're quite... Yeah yeah yeah having kids totally has made you like but yeah and but also we we used to go away and we'd get to like the airport and you would have like forgotten your wallet or something like that was a bad yeah there was there's been there or left it on the plane and so this oh yeah well Lou Lou needs to be at the airport super early. I have to sort of talk her down from five hours before the flight.

Yeah, yeah I'm a bit like that. And I like being there and I'm a bit like an anxious father. I like to get there well early so I can wander about anyway but Lou's like beyond early. Right, okay. But I think everyone's got little things like that to be fair. But with kids I don't want to be there for too long. Well in a way it's quite good because it ties them out if they're running about. Yeah. You know sometimes it's a play area. Fucking WH Smith and looking at the magazines. Oh one more, when Josh went to

Plymouth versus QPR you messaged him saying that you couldn't find the baby or the baby your youngest dummy and Josh the implication of that was Josh was like well what the fuck do you want me to do about it? Cause we just had a player sent off as well. Just had a player sent off, you couldn't find the dummy as if to be like, well, what do you want me to do about it? But I don't, we both do that to each other. Well I try, I would do, I question.

Would I just do a statement? Yeah. Right. Have you, do you know where the dummy was? Was? I don't know. No, I don't know where the dummy was. No, no, no.

I don't know why. I mean, I try. I mean, I... To cry for help. Yeah. It's more, you know, when you're having a bad time, and I imagine this is a bit like the FaceTiming in the restaurant, is that when you're having a really like tough time with the kids,

there is part of you that's like, I do need you to know this, that this is happening. Don know this that this is happening. It's all fine at home it's actually hard. Yeah like just so you know that this happened and you do like this fine you go out but you this did happen so just be aware okay and then add it into the favour tank. Yeah I think that's a good idea. It's basically lodging a complaint so that you have to go to HR. I try and keep it to myself. Do you? Yeah, just twice a week for an hour. He f***ing barks about it.

Ha ha ha! Apart from talking about it non-stop for an hour and getting it off his chest. Yeah, actually, no, you are good at that. Keeping it all inside. Yeah, just, When I went to... This sounds so awful. When I went to Ibiza, you... you're like... With your mum friends? With my mum friends, yeah. Like, they get a lot of like,

where's this, where's that? Like... Yeah. I mean... I go silent. I go radio silent. You go silent? I don't hear anything. Really? Yeah, yeah. I have to text him and be like, how are the kids? How's it going? Where is-

I just think it's better that I just play the game on my own. One of my friends had to, she, at school, there was something called, I think it was like a penny race or a one P race or something. And so they, the kids bring in like loads of one P's or coins or whatever, and they have to like put them all out and whoever has the most, it's like a rate, how many, I'd never

heard of it. I'm trying to explain something. I'm like, I don't know what this is. I cannot tell you how many reminders she gave her husband. Like there was, there was a whole schedule based around this penny race and like there was a text just like the evening before, on the morning of and then he forgot. God this makes for a good story. Or didn't pick up the phone so at that point I was like oh just fucking pass the penny

race over and let it go. I think the problem with like being a dad is though there's so many bad ones knocking about that Yeah, don't have to be an amazing one. You just need to be slightly better than all of your wife's friends partners Yeah, yeah There's no point trying to be the best dad in the world as long as you're better Smidge better than all of your wife's friends husbands your golden I quite like when I'm on my own I quite like that feeling of stepping up like do you know what I mean? You want to show Rose how to do it? No it's more like... That's so mad isn't it though?

That's so mad because... Because our son will only let Rose put him to bed yeah he's really... But when she's not he hasn't got a problem with me putting him to bed so I like I like the extra responsibility. But you know what it's so mad isn't it because there's no point where I go. It's like when a manager's on holiday and the assistant steps up and goes I can do this. It's mad I never there's no point when you're away where I like I'm like I'm gonna step up now I can't wait to step up and that's the difference isn't it like the the mom is like we're just up the whole time.

No but that's not because I don't do it. No I'm not and I'm not blaming you in particular. Well, it's because you're more of a default parent because you're at home more than Josh. Anything you'd like to add to Josh? We've sort of come into a close now. I hope so you've had a chance to respond to Rose and I've not jumped in too much,

but I think it's so much fun. No, I think that's fair. I think it's totally fair. What I mean by stepping up is- No, I know. Yeah, it isn't that I don't do anything. I get it, I get it. Let's just leave it there on a slight argument that you can resolve later. No, I know. Yeah, it isn't I don't do anything. Let's leave it there on a slight argument that you can resolve later. No, no, no, that's not what I...

No, actually it's not an argument so much as a clarification for listeners, because that sounds like... A VAR clarification. It's more that I quite enjoy everything being on me. You do. You like it. Because you do team up quite a lot. You do a lot of double teaming parenting. And I find that difficult, because it's a bit like Lampard and Gerrard, I don't know when to go, you know, I don't know when to run. But when Lampard sent off and you're like I've just got control of the midfield now on my own, I like that. And I think we've always been a

bit bad with that. Yeah, we'll both be up there during the shower and no one's cooking dinner. I know, it's mad, no one's doing dinner, we're just such idiots like that. Then we come down and we're like, oh we haven't got any dinner. And it's like, well that's because you were both trying to get them out of the shower. It's just mad. It's like we feel guilty for the one who's got the more difficult job.

So we both double team the more difficult job and forget the easy job. Yeah. And then who suffers at the end of it? Both of us. So from now on... The answer is take a little bit of suffering each. Exactly. The answer is alternate dinner and shower. I think it's really hard because...

The big question. It's so simple. The big challenge, the big issues. I think it's difficult because of our son just he wants to... We're just at that age of just running around being mental and just wants you all the time. Yeah, all the time. Yeah. Yeah. Not ideal, is it? Yeah. Oh, it's all right. Yeah. Got him the other night when Rose was out on Saturday and then you're like, totally fine. As soon as she's out, she was with her mum friends having dinner. On our anniversary. Oh, was you? What, you and Josh's anniversary?

Yeah. You went out with dinner. Me and Lou aren't spending our anniversary together. I feel like we went, we did our anniversary. Yeah we went away for a couple of times. Yeah you did, you went away for a couple of times. I know I wasn't complaining. Yeah. Rose brought that up to be clear. I didn't. I thought it would have been brought up but but. No because I'm totally fine with that.

Just a chill out guy. Rose thank you very much. If there's anything else we missed. Oh do you want to promote? Oh yeah. Let's promote. Okay. What there's anything else we've missed? Oh, do you want to promote? Oh yeah, okay. What are you promoting? You're plugging? Plugging my, well not me, mine and my partner's new interior design company. Business partner or life partner? Life partner.

Rob, ask where their first job is. Where's your first job? Oh, your interior design company? Yeah, yeah, interior design company. What's it called? It's called Penrose Tilbury. Penrose Tilbury and on Instagram, Penrose Tilbury. Yes. And where's your first job? Well the listeners will be pleased to know that it's in Exeter. But you look quite like being on your own in Rosenthal. I enjoy stepping up. We both love it as well. We're not being together. I think that it's so nice when you get an evening to yourself though isn't it?

You can just... I watched when we were kings the other night. That's good the boxing one. Yeah, it's great. I would have been up for that. Yeah, I know but I... Just watch like your murdery horrible... actually you don't really watch those anyway. What do you watch? The Vanderpumps? Yeah, I'm with the housewives. Yeah. Absolute binge. You... oh, this is just a quick one. Oh, what? I thought we were done. So you talked about the van der Pumps and all the housewives and stuff the other day. And you were like, oh, but I don't judge her on it. You know, there's no like, you absolutely do.

To the point where I'll turn it off before you come in. Because that's what you're already like, oh, that old shit. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. Oh was so dad-burning. Oh, you're watching this, actually. No, no, leave it on. Leave it on. That was fucking state of a, oh, what's this now? You totally, you totally judge me on it. I don't.

I think that's in your own head. Maybe. OK, gaslighting. Maybe. Yes! Yes! Yes! You hysterical bitch.

Time of the month. That was a joke. It actually is actually. It's very close. Rose, thank you so much. Good luck with Penrose Tilbury. Thank you. And keep getting those jobs away from home. Oh yeah.

Thanks Rose. Thank you.