Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe's Parenting Hell - S9 EP47: Rob's House Has a Leak

Episode Date: February 11, 2025

More misadventures in parenting, life, and beyond with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe... The guus discuss Rob's house having a water leak, Josh's appearance on Michael McIntyre's Midnight Game show, and is it weird to not take your watch off when you go to bed? Please follow and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available free everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com Join the mailing list to be first to hear about live show dates and tickets, Parenting Hell merch and any other exciting news... A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Willicombe. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern day parenting, each week we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping. And we'll also be hearing from you, the listener,

with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing. ["The Star-Spangled Banner"] This is Carry the Fire. I'm your host, Lisa LaFlamme. Carry the Fire, a podcast by the Princess Margaret Cancer

Foundation featuring inspiring personal stories about what happens when world leading doctors, nurses, researchers, and their patients come together to ignite breakthroughs. Carry the Fire launches Monday, January 27th, wherever you get your podcasts. Hello. You're listening to Parent in Hell with.

Reggie. Can you say Rob Beckett? Can you say Josh Woodacombe? There we go. Big Josh Woodacombe fan. Josh Woodacombe, Josh Woodicombe. Josh Ridicombe. There we go. Big Josh Ridicombe fan. Josh Ridicombe. Josh Ridicombe. Huge, huge fan.

46 months old. So he's almost four. He's a crazy toddler that never stops. After this, he spent two hours saying Josh Ridicombe to everything I said. Kate The Last, Sexly and Relatable, Becca with one C from Hull. Becca. Becca. Oh dear.

Becca. Beaker. Beaker. Beaker. Beaker. Beaker. Beaker. Beaker.

Beaker. Beaker. Beaker. Beaker. Beaker. the last sexy relatable back up with one C from hull. Becker. Becker. Beaker. Beaker? Beaker. Beaker. Sorry, we're late, Josh. We should.

It's all right. We're not late because people listen to this whenever they decide. Linear TV is dead. Well, but we, me and you are late. We normally start at 10. They listen to it whenever. I've had such a stressful morning, Josh. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm so tired. I'm really tired.

Basically, I was supposed to record this at the office, but I got to the office at 8 a.m. to let a plumber in, he fixed the pipe. And then just before I was about to record this, there was a water on the floor. And I was like, run the plumber, are you still here? He went, yeah, I'm at the front, come back in. And it was like, the boiler just like, I opened the cupboard that the boiler was in, was everything was wet, but like droplets like it exploded or there was like steam,

but it looked bad. And then when the plumber come back in, he looked crestful. Oh dear. He was like, oh no. So what I did was jumped in the car, drove back to the house to do it here. But we've also got fucking, we got a leak in the living room. So there's another plumber coming to that at some point. In the living room on the roof and the ceiling, there's those damp marks that we didn't know. The shower was leaking, so we've done the shower in isolation, the bathroom in isolation, the toilet in isolation, the sinks in isolation. We thought it was a bath. Then last night when it rained loads, there was more leaks.

What does that mean? Well, exactly. Hole in the wall. But then it's the ground floor ceiling. So like, I don't know. This is so, this is so painfully boring. Anyway, do you remember the roof tile that went missing? I told you about that. I had to get it sorted. And I said, I'll probably leave that until there's some water. It can't just be that.

That's come home to roost. I don't know but I was stood on a wall with my pajamas with a big coat on and a flashlight looking like some sort of lazy burglar. Trying to look at roof tiles in the rain. I stood there and I thought what the fuck are you even looking for? They're just all wet roof tiles. How do you know which one's leaking? Exactly Rob, you didn't follow that path in your life. So that's been happening and then yesterday yesterday, four pints of Muretti. And the way my stomach's dealing with it is like I've drunk four pints of fucking battery acid. I farted on the car on the way back here and I nearly vomited and passed out.

I don't think I've not been drinking. I've been doing well. Yeah. I knew it was going to be a bad couple of days. We went to the pub yesterday for a roast dinner. They pulled the big screen down, FA Cup weekend, which we'll get on to, up the greens. And they put the rugby on. At that point, I was like, this ain't gonna go well. Do you know what? I don't want to lose listeners, but I will. Rugby is a sport played by **** for ****. Do you know what? Sometimes the reason this show works is because of conflict, but shake

your hand, agree. I fucking hate it. I fucking hate it. Terrible sport, rugby. Awful. Awful. Boring. Boring, painful, bullying crap. Oh, God. Oh, Josh, you know what? I've got to learn to bobsleigh tomorrow.

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm going to do a rubbish again. I just don't think I'm in the right space for a bobsleigh. You're on a manic episode. I just, there's a lot. The shower's not working in one of the girls' rooms either. How difficult is bobsleigh? There's league. Do you know what? You've just got to get in, mate. I just haven't got the lot. The shower's not working in one of the girls' rooms either. How difficult is bobsleigh? There's league, do you know what?

You've just got to get in, mate. I just haven't got the mental space for it, Josh. There's four of them. Well, you won't have much space in there. I have Romasz spooning you, and then two other blokes, presumably. I'm just gonna do a couple of questionable, cool run-ins quotes that I'm not sure I'm allowed to do.

Do the John Candy ones, just for safety. I can't say, fill the rhythm, fill the ride just in my accent, and it hit home as a reference to the film. But if I say it in the Jamaican bobsleigh accent... It's not making the edit. Kissing it, just wandering around kissing an egg in Switzerland, trying to bobsleigh a Romesh, trying to get a couple of quotes out from a film from 30 years ago,

as 12-year-olds watch it and go, why is he kissing an egg, shouting, fill the rhythm filled a ride. Oh, now I've got canceled. Have I? What? Five minutes? No. Also, the other thing that's gone on Josh, I've got a whoop band. You know, things like a fitness thing that you put because basically yeah, but it's like more involved data and you wear it 24 seven, it tracks your sleep. And I would recommend any parent to avoid this like the plague, because all it does

is tell you, you haven't had enough sleep. And you look at your little app and go, I know, I don't need an app to tell me I'm fucked. Trekking your sleep feels insane to me, because one of the things you need to do with sleep is chill out about it. To know that you're not getting enough sleep is absolutely insane. It's not helpful. Yeah, I'm tired. I can fucking feel it. That's like something telling you you're hungry. Do you know what I mean? This, this app's told me I'm in 27%. What does that mean?

I'm in 27% of recovery. I don't know, but it's in red. That look good, does it? Have you got a watch? So you're wearing two watches. No, I haven't got a watch. I've got just this strap thing that tells me I'm knackered. Yeah. But I just got it. I needed a little gadget to get me back in the gym. I'm going to the gym, but you know, you need a little, like, you're bored of your board of it, your plateau and I don't think this was the thing. I also had a dream last night that Loude left me, but it wasn't like a mad dream where like, no, you left. I don't know. I've got a bad chest now. I went in the dream. It was like, oh yeah.

She was just like leaving me, but not like, and then we went on like a rocket ship and then before we know it was on a cruise and then we all made spaghetti bolognese. No, it was literally like a Ken Loach front room scene of a woman leaving her husband and the man's in denial. Absolutely nothing that would be in a dream. That the attention to my new real life detail was absurdly realistic. Like, what they call them kitchen sink drama kind of things, where it's just like, is that a thing? Yeah, leaking sink drama.

Oh, mate. I'm leaking everywhere here. From your eyes, from your sink, from your ass. Anyway, so that's why I'm late. I'm all over the place. I've got stuff going on here. And it's just busy. It's just telling you you're stressed. But we're just helping the stress. It tells you when you're stressed. You know when I get stressed? When? School running selfies. What with other parents? My heart rate goes up. No, just getting them like in and out the car to the... Are they two separate things? Yeah, to the two separate things. Yeah, no two separate things. Sorry. I was like, you can't be doing selfies with the other parents at the school. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, in the bin, isn't it? No, I'm gonna give it a go. You're not gonna be worn by this time next week.

To be fair, I had bad sleep last night because Lou dream cheated on me. I'd had too much, I had some alcohol, I'd not been drinking alcohol, and I had a cheese toastie late at night. Oh no. And I'm 39 and I can't get away with it anymore. They very rarely say that they give you like,

very realistic kitchen sink drama dreams cheese, do they? We only add mild cheddar. Ah, right. Yeah. Was it pre-grated? Was it kind of? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you get the dream of the cheese you eat. Yeah, yeah. If I whipped out a bit of blue cheese, it would all sort of go in.

I'd go, you'd win all over the fucking shop. But, oh, you know, I did have a bit of a bar. I've got loads of parenting stuff to talk to you about. Come on then. You're Barney? I like a bit of a Barney at the school. Oh yeah? My daughter was in the school football team, right? They're playing in a local team. Oh no, you're not one of those showy parents.

No, not at all. You want to though. It's very hard not to when you can see their space. Because when at nine they bunch, right? And I used to bunch at nine. But you just... That's called pressing, isn't it? It is now, back in the day. Stop bunching! They're operating a high press, even when they've got the ball. They've got the ball and they continue to high press. This is unseen. By the way, I should say, over the last 48 hours, which have been very leaky and stressful, is thank you to Tottenham Hotspur Football Club. What they're

doing for me this winter, for morale, Torque Sports just absolutely off the chain. What's happened to Tottenham Hotspur Football Club? They just keep losing and it's quite funny. As an Arsenal fan, if Tottenham keep losing, it's great value. Yeah, it keeps you going. Yeah. No, so, yeah, because when you are watching, I would never shout like, come on, try hard. I'm always like, well done,

good luck. But you do want to go, get on the left, there's space, but you don't, because you can't. I meant you'd leave the coach to do that if they want to do that. But no, there was on the opposing team, there's a woman just kept going like, you better run, shouting at the door was saying, you better run or I'm not taking you home later.

And it was sort of like a bit joking. Was that a joke? And was the joke for the other parents? That's how it fell. Oh, come on. Oh, come on. Oh, she's got her hands in her pockets. You're not running. If you don't run, you're not coming out. Don't she got pockets?

Well, she won't. I don't know. It's your first mistake. They're nine, Josh. It's freezing cold. They're on a hockey pitch. No one knows what they're doing really. And most of them got jogging bottoms on. One's got their hood up. No one cares. Let them run around. let them have fun. They'll have a photo at the end, they'll cheer each other, they kick a couple of balls, go home. That's what sport is, right? Let's just chill out about it. Okay, apart from Tottenham fans, keep ringing in, talk sport about Levy and Ange, please.

So do you listen to talk sport still, Rob? You're still going through your talk sport thing? Only when big clubs lose. If Arsenal lose, I'm well away from it. I got asked to do talk sport this morning. I've become a media darling for the last 12 hours Rob. Oh, you're the big Plymouth boy, aren't you? I've done Five Live and Radio 4. And Five Live. Who presents Five Live? Rick Edwards. I love Rick Edwards. Oh yeah?

I love Rick Edwards. That big guy, what's he called? Alan Brazile. Alan Brazile. Love a gallon. Big Al. And Gabriela bongle hall. Yeah. Alan Brazil. When it comes to attention to detail, that man's very laissez faire. Where he was into months. I don't know if you've seen this clip where he has a bomb on cows. Yeah. Yeah, it's the best clip of all time. Where for people that don't know what's going on is a TV critic ends up to talk about Gary Bushel. Let's just really paint the scene.

Bromley boy, actually, he used to do Quasar. Um, when Gary Bushel been in Quasar once when I was a kid, and it seemed like quite a big deal, Gary Bushel's playing Quasar, um, LaserQuest. Um, and anyway, he was ringing about to talk about the TV and I said, what you been up to when I was at the, um I was at the memorial night for Bob Monkhouse. They did a big show because he passed away recently. A big show about the amazing things, stories about him and clips. And they go on about what a great performance Bob Monkhouse was and amazing clips

and what a life he had. And then Adam Rizil goes, how is Bob's elf at the moment? And no one wants to tell him he's dead. The silence is incredible. There's a three second silence. Because I don't know if he's doing a joke. And then Gary Bushell goes, he died. And then the best bit is Brazil tries to save it. Yeah, I cringed so much actually couldn't listen to the rest of it. Because he says, Oh, right. Because I'd had two versions. Yeah. What's that mean?

What does that mean? That's a man panicking. Like he's trying to introduce a two pack conspiracy that he's not I don't know. I just think he's like, I just don't know. Princess Diana, two pack and Bob Monkhouse. Even Princess Diana and two pack, you wouldn't ask about their health. You'd ask maybe that they would, you know, maybe there's the, how do you phrase this? I don't think this is problematic legally to say. Conspiracies, there's conspiracies.

They're still alive. No, is there conspiracies? They're still alive. I thought there was just conspiracies. I don't know what you're talking about, Josh. Wink. No, I think there's conspiracies about deaths, but also there are some people that suggest certain people like Michael Jackson and two Hitler. Oh, he must be dead by now.

But by now he's dead. But there's a lot. It's a really big conspiracy theory. No, but I mean, Hitler was the big one because they never found a body. How has this happened on a Monday morning? We're not laughing, we're learning. It's my fault, but now we're talking about Hitler too. We've gone from Alan Brazil to Hitler. Oh yeah, Plymouth. So you saw Plymouth beat Liverpool 1-0 in the FA Cup, the greatest victory ever for Plymouth, I'd say, against probably the best side in Europe at this time is Liverpool.

The best side in the world. This is a weird thing that gets bandied around, isn't it? the best side in Europe at this time is the best side in the world. This is a weird thing that gets well, this is a weird thing that gets bandied around isn't it? The best side in Europe, all the best sides are in Europe. So they are by definition the best side in the world. Well, yeah, yeah, exactly. But some people in Brazil would say that's like sort of Santos or Vasco de Gallo. I agree with you.

So was you there or would you watch the other telly? The answer to that Rob. I was at Strictly Come Dancing Live at the 02. What? Why? I know you're looking for a move into acting Rob, but I know that you can play. What's that? I know that you know this. So don't play Alan Brazil pretending to have found out Bob Monkhouse is dead. What version of you at the O2? Yes. You did that very well. Can I just say you did that very well because the listeners would believe that you were... I know. Yes. You'd booked that in before the FA Cup draw, correct?

Yeah. So I'd say filmac entire entertainment booked it in. I just sorted it out. So when you saw you drew Liverpool, were you not tempted to say, Rose, why don't you just take the girls, the girl that my girl, our daughter. Sorry, it's good to say the girls all the time. I am not right. I've had four hours sleep. Who told me I'm on 27% of my one more reti per hour. I was on 94% yesterday.

I was flying. I thought I'm going to be 100 today. There's nothing worse than you feel a bit shit and then look at your wrist to see a numerical fucking reason. Actual data. And this is when you're, and then the problem is, I mean, this never ended stress cycle because I started look at the data and then I see it go, the stress go up because I'm looking at the stress. It's a bit like when someone tells you you're angry, it only makes you more angry. I know, but I know it's right. Yeah, I just want to scream

into the whoop. I've got fucking children. It goes, we suggest that you go to bed tonight at 10pm and wake up at 8.30am. Oh, do you? Yeah, I'd suggest that as well, actually. You're not suggesting it like I've not thought of it. Do you know what I mean? That would be quite good. Will it just sleep till nine? I fucking can't. And I can't go to sleep at eight because I'm fucking up there stroking the youngest one's arm till quarter to ten because she's had too much iPad.

Won't go to sleep. Won't settle. Oh, can I talk to you about my screen time, Rob? Put a pin in it. Fucking hell, this is like jazz today. It's not. Oh, what? In your defense of Plymouth, let's talk about your screen time in a minute. Plymouth.

I'm a good man. But no, but well, you're not tempted when you got Liverpool to go, why don't you take the kids and like, cause you're not that bothered about what is strictly live, are you? I know, but I like going to things where my daughter's enjoying it.

Right, okay. Do you know- And that would not be Plymouth our home. No, she fucking hates football. But I like going to things where my daughter's enjoying it right okay, you know not be putting a farm Fucking hates football. I put it on in the car on the way home. Yeah on the radio She just fucking hates football and you know what fair play to her But also in your defense if you'd missed out on going to strictly just to watch Plymouth get battered 3-0 which is probably I know this sent It's difficult to say stuff like this

without sounding like a complete wanker. It's not stopped you before. I want to think sometimes I might be a bit of a wanker. No I love it. There's no doubt about you being a bit of a wanker. Yeah, like just accept that because you've got all the people that don't like people might think of a wanker and I think, well, maybe they're right up a bit. We're all fucking wankers. Yeah, maybe they are. I am a wanker to them, but that's all right. Did I tell you about Richard Madeley? Hang on, get another pin.

Running out of pins here. Got more pins than leaks. So I was, I was sat next to- Everywhere's wet. Sorry. I was sat next to him come back. You've not been putting a pin in my pipes, have you? I think Josh put a pin in my boiler.

I was sat next to Richard Madeley for four hours. Right. What, when? Rob Beckett's Smart TV. Oh, I'm sorry. So he was on my team. So when you're that's on soon. That's me, Josh Allison. Great guest. Yeah. So when you're on a team with someone who's a podcast as well, but I'm gonna put a pin in it quickly. The show's called Rob

Beckett Smart TV. Yeah, yeah. She's done a podcast called Smart TV of Allison Hammond. Oh, she's on. First of all, where's mine and Josh's invite? Second of all, it should be Rob Beckett's Smart TV podcast with Alison Hammond. Let's be honest. If you're, if you're trying to sell a podcast, get the fucking name Rob Beckett on it. People search it. Also crucially, just for the record, the rest is history and Smart TV. The rest is history with Alison Hammond. The rest is politics.

The rest is politics, history, entertainment, parenting on menu hell with Alison Hammond. Call it that. Call it that. Sorry, gone. And pin out. Yeah. Richard May, four hours on Rob Beckett's part TV. So I said to him, Oh, you were of Tony Wilson, Rob, the guy that he was, have you watched the film

24 hour party people with Steve Coogan? And yeah, so he was the manager of Joy Division, factory records and all that kind of stuff. He worked very closely with Richard Madeley. They were both at Grenada at the same time. So I was making conversation with Richard Madeley. I said, Oh, what was Tony Wilson like? Yeah. And he was like, I really liked him. He said, the first time I met Tony Wilson, I'd driven to Granada and there was a Tony Wilson time is hosting the local news. And there was graffiti all over Manchester. Yeah. Just that just said, Tony Wilson is a wanker. And I said to him, we're making a cup of tea together. I said to him, don't you? Doesn't that upset you? And he was like, No, because I am a wanker. He said, Do you like being on TV, Richard? And he said,

Yeah. And he said, Then you're a wanker. If you want to be on TV, all of us are wankers. Yeah, you've got something in you that needs attention. So why were they calling him a wanker, the graffiti? What has he done to be called a wanker? I think because he was just a bit of a local celebrity and a bit kind of arrogant, not arrogant, but like kind of thought a lot of himself. Yeah, man of a town. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. It wasn't that, you know, so we're all wankers. We're all wankers.

Okay. We're all wankers. So that slides us quite neatly into your screen time. Have you been wanking? No, I haven't. My screen time has dropped through the floor. Oh, what's happened? Cause of my, cause of my brick. Your brick. See I've come off TikTok, but now I just go on Instagram Reels. Yeah, yeah. And then I turn that off and then I go on YouTube shorts. And it feels a bit like smoking cigarettes.

I dropped below four hours this week. That's good. And how you been feeling off because of that? Much better. And I also five hours of that, so almost an hour a day was Google Maps, which I don't think should count a screen time. Well, yeah, if you're because if you're looking at it to that get from A to B, I'm you I'm fucking driving to Lewis. That is the screen time. It was like 14 hours.

I was like, what the hell? Oh, yeah, I drove to Cornwall. It shouldn't be allowed. No, that should, I had one, it was like 14 hours. I was like, what the hell? Oh, yeah, I drove to Cornwall. It shouldn't be allowed. No, that should be, you should be able to turn that off. Should be able to turn that off. So there we go. Anyway.

Which is weird because they want you to feel like you're not on your phone too much, don't they, phone companies? Why are they making you feel worried about being on it with that? Exactly, exactly. So next. Yeah, I agree with that. And next, now let's get back to Plymouth

and then I'll talk about Skull Falls. So I went to the O2. So he doesn't like being named on the podcast, does he? So I'll just say, your agent, Rob, who I would say is a one of the he's a great man. He's a wonderful human being. And he's got, you know, when you know, people who've got all their priorities, right? Yeah, all his priorities, right? He's got a very good heart. Very honest, very, I'd say, direct. He said something to me that stuck with me. I said to him about he doesn't go to watch Millwall much anymore. No. And he said because his son's not into Millwall, and he'd rather spend the weekends going to do the things his son wants,

rather than, you know, because this time flies away from you. And you want to be able to connect with them, there's no point in taking them to something they don't like. Exactly, so it's, I would rather spend, oh, I know, to go back to sounding like a wanker, I'd rather spend time with my daughter doing something she'd like than get the train to Plymouth. It's a long old trip out.

It's a long old trip. It's just not really, you know, it's not as important as. And also if you were guaranteed that Plymouth were going to win one-nil, right? And you had a first of all, you could go to the game or go, why don't we try and move the tickets to the next matter? I mean, or do something like that, but you don't know they're going to win. You don't know they're going to win. And do you know what I mean? Or do something like that, but you don't know they're gonna win. You don't know they're gonna win.

And do you know what? Yeah. Life is totally fine without going. And I know that's not the attitude that people are looking for. But what I would say, I know that, but like there's plenty of times to go and watch some people dance with your kid.

Rob. Do you know what I mean? Rob, straight up. Where Plymouth beating Liverpool in their FA Cup at home is a once in a lifetime opportunity and a feeling you cannot buy or replicate. You can only feel once in that moment in 190 minutes. But if you want to see Karen do the cha-cha. I've seen Karen do the cha-cha.

Do you want to see, do you want to know this has had an effect on me? This morning I said to Rose, I'll be honest with you, I don't want to go to Glastonbury. I don't want to go. What caused that thought? I was like, actually, these things that you'd want to do without your kids, I want to do the right ones. Do you know what I mean? I don't want to, I was like, I'm not that fussed about going to Glastonbury.

Then why am I going away when, do you know what I mean? It's such a fucking faff to do anything without your kids. You need to just go. It's because you don't drink anymore and it's just a place for you to get completely out of the fucking box. And not be judged because it's middle class. Yeah, exactly. I can find you a pub in South East London, you go there and do whatever you want every weekend. Why wait and

save up to do it stood in the field? Exactly. former A's. former A's. Oh, God. I'm sad to admit that maybe I've reached an age where things that I was desperate to do previously, I'm not that fussed about doing anymore, but I think they'll come back in my fifties. Glastonbury is shit unless you're off your face. And Plymouth-Argala pretty shit. Unless you win against a depleted Liverpool team. Yeah. Also, let's be fucking honest,

the upsets aren't upsets anymore when you look at the fucking teams they put out. My kids are going to love Glastonbury and want to go. And I'm just going to be like, oh my God, I'll send Luke. Do you know what? That's when I'm going to go back to Glastonbury when I can take my children. Yeah. I mean, yeah. And if they're enjoying it, but I'll just don't. Imagine you sat there all sober watching them get up to all sorts because no one should take my kids to go to fucking Glastonbury and watch. When my daughter's 14, she can go to Glastonbury. She's not going to be getting off her face,

hopefully. No, no, of course. But like, you can take, yeah, and go, we'll wander around and watch some bands together. Yeah. I'm trying to get these Sabrina Carpenter tickets, Rob. All right. But now I'm worried.

Go on. I'm essentially taking my daughter to some kind of licensed sex show. Right. Is it a bit raunchy, then? It's incredibly raunchy. I find it weird of her as well because she looks so young. I find it quite uncomfortable.

She's 25. Yeah, but she looks about 14. Right. Yeah. I'm just like, I shouldn't be here. This isn't for me. But then it's not for you. It's for your daughter. But you can't send an eight year old in on her own to a sex show.

Is it a sex show or have you turned into a Daily Mail comment? No, I was obviously joking for Rob's Googling straight away. Well yeah, but you've called it a sex show. No, no. There's been a lot of parents that have complained. I find the album, I think the album is fucking incredible. Is it the outfits or is it what she's doing? She does a sex position during Song Joon-ho. But I don't think that's going to be lost.

She changes it up every night, Rob. I didn't think there'd be enough, to be honest. But, um... Three nights in, she's going back again. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Front back side, isn't it? Like an haircut when you're 13. Front back side. And repeat.

I think that's going to be lost on a seven-year-old. Because she's not too scantily clad. Oh my God. What am I? These scantily clad women, I mean, I don't, I think what she's wearing is fine. She just, I think it's good. I think it's good. It's just loads of people, a couple of people. Cause you liked her, not acceptable. If you take your daughter. I do like her. I think her music, to be clear, is undeniably brilliant.

I've not really got into her, to be honest. Listen to her album, Short and Sweet. We listen to that in the car every day. She's short, isn't she? She's five foot. Sorry. I think five foot's the funniest height. Not for the height and like laughing at someone being small but bang on the nose five foot, like not 4'11", not 5'1", five foot.

No. How tall are you? I'm five foot. Five foot what? I'm five foot. Because it's not that I'm four foot, you're like four foot, like, four foot, 11 normally. Yeah. I'm five foot. What? One?

None. Five foot. Bessah, short and sweet. Got her own name? Got her own name? I'm thinking of watching more TikTok, Rob. Okay. Like what?

In what regard? I watched a clip of Dochi at the Grammy. She's brilliant. She's fucking incredible. And I was like, I need to be getting more of these kind of clips in my life. Well, I agree. And I think it will help you with a broader idea of culture. Because my knowledge of culture, up to 2008 when I started stand up, I would say, I don't think there's anyone on earth

that knows more about culture from 1983 to 2010. Yeah, and then you've completely tapped out for 15 years. Completely tapped out. Exactly. It's a bit like with alcohol, I can't find a middle ground drop. All or with a cup or nothing like asked me something about 2004. Fuck it. I know everything. Ask me something about 2014. I'm fucked. Well, TikTok is basic culture now. That is where it's all been bled through and then it ends up. So something you'll see funny will end up on Facebook in about two months.

So what I was thinking of doing, because I don't know who to follow. God, I was thinking of doing, because I don't know who to follow. God, I'm up 200 years old. Well, that's the beauty of Tik Tok. You follow the algorithm and the way, and it tells you what you want to see. But sometimes you might end up with loads of blur stuff and you're like, well, I'm not actually getting anything new here. Exactly. So yeah, I might get,

is not to mention another person from the office that runs our lives. Yeah. So there's a young person called Antonia who works there tones. Yeah, yeah, she's great. I mean, she's young. I noticed it was their 30th birthday the other day. You should go on GK Barry's podcast and talk to her. I love GK Barry. I might just get Antonia to log into my account and follow a load of people for me. You don't really follow people on TikTok. You don't follow people? Not really.

I don't. You sort of just go for the for you page and weirdly you'll get some random people Is that why no one follows me? And it's called, yeah, no one's really following. Right. I don't think. Well, I'm not. I don't really like any pictures either, but I've just never have.

Okay. Well, I'm going to start my TikTok journey this week. Oh, I thought you started TikTok years ago. I know. But after seeing that Dochi clip, I was like, this is for me now. Do you know what I need to get? Can you send me the link for the brick? I'm going to get the brick because at the moment I deleted my TikTok. It's not helping. I'm just watching shit YouTube shorts. Mainly, weirdly, of clips of this. Yeah. Anyway. Oh God.

Right. Do we talk about the football, the school football? That one that was that lady that was going Oh, sorry, we've been pinning for about 20 minutes now. I'll unpin. I've got loads here. I've got loads of stuff. I was off a lot last week, so I had the kids loads and I had them all weekend. Lou was out Friday and Saturday nights. Oh, can I just quickly pin this? Probably why? She had an affair in my dreams. And then I posted a photo of us on Instagram and everyone said how fit Lou looks and how much I'm punching. So it must have been,

I think I'm quite a vulnerable skeleton of another man deep there. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I do need to talk about McIntyre at some point, but maybe we could do that on Friday morning. Oh, the school thing. Oh, yeah, no. So she kept on saying that sort of trying to be funny and make laugh. But I think she wanted to I don't know. No, she was from another school. Oh, so she was like, Okay, well, she's saying that to her kid. I'm just not acknowledged. I'm not gonna laugh along or politely go. I'm just sort of like ignoring it. Because it's not, you know, it's not aimed at me. But she sort of felt like doing it for people around her. And then and then one point, our team scored. And then it was a bit of an easy goal to go in, but they all are really at that age, basically they're all learning how to play.

You get a couple of really good ones, but our school is quite good. If someone's, there's a couple of really good players and after they scored a few goals, they go right, play at the back now. And they sort of try and teach them positioning discipline because they could just get it and run through that team and score every time. Well, No one's learning. But if they have to play at centre back, they can learn how to play in defence. Anyway, and then we scored another

goal and then the woman went, Oh, we are dreadful. And in the end, I was like, I walked away. I was like, I can't. That's not on. But I'm so close. It triggers me to the point where I want to go, you need to shut up. That is unacceptable. Your poor kids, but you can't do that. And then I become the one having a rail of the touch. And they weren't even saying it about my kid. I'm worried that if I am there and someone's saying about my kid,

I don't know if I'll, what I, Could the kids hear it? Do you think? Definitely. That's fucking awful. Kids hear it, do you think? Definitely. That's fucking awful. It's bad, isn't it? Do you know what I think has done a lot of damage

in the last year? What has done my head in is I wish that David Beckham's dad hadn't been proved right. You know, have you watched the David Beckham doc? Oh, where you like forced him to train. He's like a real prick of a footballing dad. Yeah, I wouldn't let him in until he'd done so and so kind of stuff. And then it's like, oh, and it paid off. And you're like, I don't think it did pay off. Well, it did. It did pay off. But it didn't. But I don't think that is a good thing for people to

be fucking learning as I do. I might in my experience of meeting a lot of athletes. I think they are weird. The sacrifices you have to make to be top, top elite, the sacrifices you have to make are catastrophic and it hits you on your like social circles and everything. And then they go so far as a tipping point where I can't go back now because I've sacrificed this much. I've got to achieve it. And then everything's wrapped up in, you've got to become this either play for that team or win that trophy or earn that money or go into that league.

And it's like, that is the be all and end all. And sometimes that happens. That's why a lot of athletes, especially footballers and boxers, struggle after retirement because all of their self-worths wrapped up in football, but actually life's bigger than that. And even when you are playing football and, and you know, when you look at it now, like stuff like, you know, Carl Walker, for example, where like, I'm not,

I don't want to comment on his situation, but like, he has achieved everything, but like, his life must be chaos at the moment. Yeah. And I feel really sorry for everyone involved in stuff and, and not like, you know, you know, people have made decisions or whatever, but it's like, and that can happen to anyone in any life, but I just feel like sometimes and not like, you know, so, you know, people have made decisions or whatever, but it's like, and that can happen to anyone in any life, but I just feel like sometimes it's like it sport isn't the be all and end all. And actually I'm not sure if my child

being an athlete since she would be, you know, the best thing ever. No, I don't think it was. Position to be where, you know, you hear parents talk about they become a golfer, the tennis player or football or whatever, you know, yeah, I know. But I think that is good. I tell you, enjoy it. Look at Tiger Woods. Yes, exactly. Like he's completely his life's mental and it's all gone a bit wrong and the forces and then he's crashed his car. All this stuff. And if you actually

do a deep dive and a lot of these people, especially the ones at the top top of Lee, they are the stuff that his dad used to do. It's insane. It's mad. I recommend on Drax's book, if anyone's interested in that kind of thing. That's a great book, that kind of stuff. Yeah. But anyway, this is my theory on it, Rob. Maybe, Rob. What we should do is that woman's kid's probably not going to be good enough. They should come down and they should say, it's fine to be one of these mad parents if your child has the talent to make it.

But we're gonna tell you now, we've seen the match today, there's 22 quid kids, none of them are gonna be professional. Look at the video of Lionel Messi when he's seven. No, I think they shouldn't do that. You should just enjoy this because... They line up every child and go, none of you will make it. Just go out and enjoy yourself. Yeah, just enjoy it.

It's like karaoke. Don't run in karaoke worrying about whether you're going to be Taylor Swift. Yeah, but I don't think... I think you can just say go enjoy yourself without saying you're not going to make it. Yeah, I think it's unnecessarily negative. I believed I was going to make it as a footballer far later than any real realist. I wasn't even in the school team and I still had dreams. I just thought I could make it maybe one like Jimmy Grimble's boots. Remember that Jimmy Grimble? What else is going on?

I've got something for you, Rob. Yes. I've just barked at you. No, you haven't barked at me at all. Oh, I've got, yeah. You hit me. A few pet update. We're not gecko lizard and goats out the question after quite a few calls. I call them interventions actually from friends. Oh yeah. Talk to me about this. Well, apparently gecko lizards are awful because you have to give

them live food. And they make this, I'll play this voice now a friend of mine sent me about it. And they said that this is like if anyone else out there thinking of getting a gecko lizard. Hi guys, I just wanted to message in after listening to the podcast today to say that whatever you do, do not get a leopard gecko. We had a rescue one for a while and it was hell basically. They can live for up to 15 years, sometimes longer. You have to clean them out every single week and they

eat disgusting food, live food obviously, like worms which end up crawling around your house. There's crickets and the crickets are a nightmare because they make so much noise and you will not get any sleep at night. And they're basically on death row and making that noise. And also they live in these solarium sort of constructions and whenever you take them out you have to make sure that you wash your hands because they can pass on salmonella. So that's great, basically. If you're thinking of doing it, don't end off. Yeah, exactly.

I've got a message on that topic, Rob. Go on. It's from a Louise Beckett. No, she's not done enough of a voice. She's quite fit if you recognise her. Out of my league. Out of your league. Right, one more pushback.

I didn't suggest the goats. Rob suggested the goats. She suggested goats, I swear. So this is the plan. We've said to her, and to be fair, she loves animals, she's researching it. We said she can get a, for her birthday which is in December, she can get a hamster. Just round the corner. Well, that way we thought she might forget about it. for her birthday, which in December she can get hamster and they do, just around the corner.

Well, that way we thought we might forget about it. But we said get the hamster and then get the hamster for your birthday, get the hamster, the cage, the food, the ball and all that kind of stuff. And in the meantime, we'll do research on the type of hamster that will sit on your shoulder and will be tame. Someone said that there's a type of hamster that you breed that is good for that. And then what we'll do is we'll have Christmas and then first week of January, we'll go and collect the hamster so that we'll all be at home a lot and indoors to tame the hamster and be in the bath for the hamster. And then you don't want to get like, it's a birthday, so close to Christmas, you don't want this hamster in this big loud stressful house and no one cares. And then on,

if we do it the first week, because hamsters,sters live for a couple of years, they are a good pet for an eight-year-old and stuff. So yeah, I think it's a good decision. Rob. So that's us. That's me and Lou thinking things through Josh, our new approach to life. You've done well. You kicked it down the road 10 months and another month to get through Christmas. In fact, you said you can have a hamster in 11 months. And she's agreed. She's agreed. I think that's good. It's good parenting, Rob. It's almost like that's what politicians do, hoping there'll be another government in charge to deal with it. Exactly, yeah. Hopefully she'll have been adopted by then. Did I tell you, Rob, that Spotify does AI descriptions of our episodes? No, I did not. I did not know this.

So if you go on to Spotify, they do episode chapters that must be... I know they do transcribe all the words. So transcribed it, but then also it does episode chapters. Okay. These chapters are auto-generated. Oh, hang on. I've just sent something to you. Don't look at them.

Sorry, no, I just found on the group that I sent you something that says don't listen to something out in the pod. I don't remember what it is. No, should we listen? Should we do that quickly? Yeah. And then we'll do... I give you full permission.

In fact, I want you to. Even if you don't think I'll be receptive, I want you in the future. I want you to be receptive. I want you to be receptive. I want you to be receptive. I want you to be receptive. I want you to be receptive. I want you to be receptive. I want you we'll do. I give you full permission. In fact, I want you to, even if you don't think I'll be receptive, I want you in the future to say, Louise, you know I'm right. This is madness. It's too much. I want you to say it, please.

That was sent to me by my friend who I sent to ages ago where Lou sometimes gets overexcited and will organize things that maybe is a bit hasty and I'll offer maybe some words that go against her ideas that she will say, no, keep that to yourself, stop ruining my fun, blah, blah, blah. But actually, I think they were quite astute observations. And that was from when Lou tried to build an entire eight person mini tents for a sleepover for our child's birthday the week before Christmas. So my friend sent me that saying, next time Lou sends a voice, you do have this as backup. Oh my word. Do you worry that you're poking kind of, you know, I'm poking a bear that shits in the woods.

Yeah, poking the bear that shits in the woods. You worry about that shits in the woods. I think I, do you know what? I'm the kind of guy that'll poke a bear that's shitting in the woods, mate. And I'll live for the consequences. Exactly. So yeah, so that was what that was. So yeah, I've opened, I do agree. I think I've opened voice note wars again with Lou, but that is something there. So next time Lou has a go at me, I can just play that back to her.

I'll give you full permission. Full permission. In guy, I could just play that back to her. Full permission. In fact, I want you to want me to even if you don't think I'll be receptive. Even if that's the key line, even if even if you don't think I'll be receptive is the key line there. Yes, exactly. Do you want to hear the voice? Do you want to hear the the last week's episode described by Spotify? Yes. And I want to talk to you about Michael McIntire coming to

your bedroom. Oh, yeah, let's do those right in zero minutes zero seconds intro. Yeah Five minutes ten seconds the first sleepover. Yeah Eight minutes twenty seconds Adrian is a builder. Adrian is a painter not a builder, right? So these are like almost like chapters of the like sections of the pod that they've broken down with AI. Yeah. Okay. Nine minutes, 52 seconds, Ramesh and Tom Davis. 15 minutes, pets. Yeah. 16 minutes, six. Josh hates gays. Whoa. 19 minutes. So they say I can read your mind. Pretty extreme stuff, isn't it? Josh hates gays. Why does it say that? I think

because I said about your daughter having to sit and listen to you and Tom Allen, and you said that you implied that my issue with that was that Tom Allen was a homosexual. Yes. Okay. with that was that Tom Allen was a homosexual. Yes okay yeah and AI has jumped on that and made the chapter title Josh hates gays. Of course because we don't know if you just hate Tom Allen so that we could, can we add that to Josh hates this gay? No I don't hate Tom Allen at all I actually spoke to him on the phone yesterday. Oh yes I spoke to him on the phone yesterday. Oh, yes. I spoke to him on the phone yesterday as well actually. That's why he phoned me, because he just spoke to you. So, um, so I'll keep you informed as to whether any more chapter titles, but it was quite shocking to see Josh Hakes gaze. Someone sent it to me. Yeah, please send in any more problematic episode titles, not episode titles.

We talk about it for three minutes and then we move on to how fast can you do a 5k? So there we go. Josh, let's talk about that's Michael McIntyre's late night game show where Michael McIntyre came into your half built home and woke the human Rosa. Yeah, in fact it was Halloween night. Halloween night? In October? I've been practicing dancing all day. Of course. This was before strictly was Halloween night. Halloween night? In October? I'd been practicing dancing all day.

Of course. This was before Strictly was even confirmed. Yeah, exactly. I'd been practicing dancing all day. I was in quite like, it was one of the first days I was doing dancing. And you had no idea? So I was fucked. No.

So Rose knew obviously. Well, yeah, I knew Rose knew because she wakes up like she's not been asleep. Just waiting there. Well, she hasn't been asleep, yeah. Just lying there waiting for Macintyre with, I'd say, I've never seen anyone sleep with perfect pajamas on and her watch and bracelets on. Oh no, she leaves her watch and bracelets on because her bracelets don't come off. Oh, they're welded on and her watch, she sleeps in her watch and bracelets.

I think she does sleep in her watch and bracelets, yeah. Wow. Yeah. I thought she put that on. I sleep in my watch. Do I think she does sleep in a watch and braces yeah yeah do you tell you why you're sleeping with your bloody thing on tell you not sleeping that's different I've only just started doing that I've never wake up in the night and they are bloody hell this watch is a bit much I have my watch on at all times except when I'm showering How do you need to take... I never wake up in the night and think, Oh, bloody hell, this watch is a bit much. I have my watch on at all times except when I'm showering. That is so weird. Josh, that is the fucking weirdest thing I've ever... I get the braces.

That is mad. Wearing a watch as you sleep all night. That is... I'm going to go out in the street and do a fucking census. This is mental. No, we'll do an Instagram vote. Get on our Instagram. It's fucking weird. Just say it's fucking mental, but I do it. That's what you've got to do. Two things. No, it's not mental at all. It's the first time I've ever addressed this. You need to let me just be very clear on this. Why would I take it off? A, because it's uncomfortable and you've had it on your hand. It invalidates the insurance.

Oh my gosh. That's why you do it, isn't it? No, it's not actually. It's not because actually it doesn't invalidate the insurance in your own house. Oh right that's just a bit of Josh Wheeler come on stage banter. No I actually um thought it through and then thought actually within the house I'm allowed to take it off. We remember the incident at the beach. You took it off there? No I didn't take it off at the beach, Rob. Do you not remember? I went into the sea and I had to keep my hand out of the water. So my argument is, right, obviously, like, I'm trialing this thing you have on at night for sleep tracking to see how I perform.

It bears no relation to my life. My watch is part of me. It's so strange to sleep with your watch on all night. It's not. It's fucking... Can I ring someone now? Michael is not a witness because he doesn't wear a watch so he doesn't know anything about watch. Try ring Tom Allen and ask him. Yeah, phone Tom Allen. And you ring someone.

Because he's like knows what it is. Yeah. Oh, Tom. Oh, Tom. Who would pick up? He does apprentice on a Monday. Oh, for God's sake. Who collects watches? I tell you what, Ellis James loves watches. Okay, bring Ellis James.

This is fucking brutal on us. Oh no. Okay. What, just getting aired? Yeah. Just ask not. I tell you what, I'm trying to ring the office. Shall I ring the, our agents? I know this is for all you guys.

And they can quickly. For fuck's sake. They can do a quick straw poll in the office. Yeah, yeah. I'm gonna do that, yeah. Well no, but you're only allowed to poll, no, but Rob, they're young in the office. What's that got to do with wrists? They've got...

Oh, he's off work this month. Fuck it, now this is a... He's off work this week. What a couple of sad cunts we are. Just sad losers, not having any friends who know anything about watches. Absolutely pathetic. It's not about watches, it's about humanity and being normal. You don't need to be a watch expert to know you don't wear a watch all night in bed.

You do wear a watch all night in bed, otherwise how do you check the time when you wake up? Next to your bed, you fucking serial killer. What do you mean? You literally don't get your alarm out. Alarm clock next to your bed or your phone. I haven't got an alarm clock. Your phone? Have you got an alarm clock?

No, I've got my phone and then I've got my watch that sits on. Yeah, I look at my phone. I look at my phone to take the time to be fair. I just don't take my watch off. That is weird. It's not. I've got no mates. Let's phone Ramesh. As if he'll pick up. He's probably doing the weakest link and the travel dock at the same time.

Right. I'm going to phone Ramesh. I'm going to ring my agent. That doesn't count. That's unfair. I might just type a random number in. I'm going to ring the office. Right. Here you go. Ramesh. An Apple watch don't count if you're sleep tracking. Oh, someone's backtracking. I'm good. He ain't gonna answer. Let me ring the office. Oh, hello. Hello.

Sorry. I'm all right. Can I just we're just having an argument on the podcast. Can we just get you to settle it, Ron? Yeah, sure. Is this happening on the podcast now. Is that right? Have you got anything you want to promote? Um, leagues on at the moment.

League of the Roam. Just watch that, that'd be great. Yeah. Okay, what's the argument? Rob thinks it's weird that I don't take my watch off when I go to bed. That is weird. It is really weird. I don League of the Rhone up his ass. Well, at least you'll always know what time it's on. You get your watch on at all times.

Do you wear it on in the shower? No, I don't wear it in the shower, no. Okay, fine. I like that. At least the wrist is getting sun washing. But I think it's actually, yeah, it's super weird. And it's a hygiene issue. It's not a hygiene issue.

Anyway, you know, enjoy. All right. See you later. All right. Bye. Thanks, bye. League of the Rhone every Thursday. Bye.

Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye's a hygiene issue. It's not a hygiene issue. Anyway, enjoy. All right. See you later. All right. Bye. Thanks, bye.

League of the Rhone every Thursday. Bye. Do you want me to ring someone else? It's not the show it was, is it? League of the Rhone. I'm going to ring up the office. Just a quick straw poll. Okay.

Hi, my name is Liza. Oh, hi, Liza. I'm doing the podcast with Josh. Can we settle a quick debate? Me and Josh are having. Do you mind doing a quick straw poll in the office? Josh wears his wristwatch, a leather wristwatch. No, no, no.

No one's called it a... Yeah, yeah. Well, I can't. Yeah, he wears a leather wristwatch, not an Apple watch or a sleep tracker, just a normal wristwatch, and he wears it all night whilst he sleeps. No, no, you can't phrase that Rob, with such a pointed thing. Okay. All right. He's shouting at me and you can't hear him. So basically, can you ask

yourself, is it normal to wear your watch in bed all night? Do you don't need the word all night? No one's gonna take it off at 3am. Right. Okay. He's shouting at me. Sorry. Yeah. Sorry. Do you mind have a quick ask? Would you wear a watch all night in bed? No, I don't wear a watch at all though. It doesn't count then. Do you mind if I have a quick ask? Would you wear a watch all night in bed? No, I don't wear a watch at all though. It doesn't count then. Is there anyone else in the office you could ask quickly for us just to do a quick straw poll?

Of course, no problem. Give me one minute. Thanks. Just try booking her Michael McIntire's arena tour and I've got to wander around the office. You're not busy are you, Monday morning? Hands up if you would wear a watch to bed. Rob's asking. Only if it was a smart watch with a track on it. No leather watch. No leather watch, he's telling them all.

Yeah, no. No, is it weird? Unanimous, no. Unanimous? Weird. Ask them if they think it's weird. Can you just say it again to show them if they think it's weird? Can you shout if they think it's weird. Can you just say, if they think it's weird. Can you shout if you think it's weird?

Can you shout out if you think it's weird? Yeah, that's the whole office. Thank you guys. Cheers. Bye. Bye. Good luck with your inner tours. Bye bye. I'm joining Abolon, just so you know. Josh, it is fucking weird.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I've never... Sometimes I think culturally... Do you know what, Rose takes her watch off, I think. Can I just say something? Just like, sometimes culturally I think, oh, that's weird, but that's because I live the sheltered life. This I'm putting my neck on right now.

Is it a class thing, Rob? Is it a class thing? Absolutely not. It's a fucking... I think it's a class thing. Your weird thing. That's what it is. No, it's not, Rob. I'm sticking by it. I am. I guarantee. I think it's a class thing. Your weird thing. That's what it is. No, it's not. I'm sticking by it. I am. I guarantee. I think it's a class thing. The only person you'll find that agrees with you is someone that does it in guilt and shame and quietly on the side. Okay, so let's go

back to McIntyre. Let's go back to McIntyre. So Rose's right at watch. Also, Rob, she'd had a blow dry. Let's be very clear on that. Yeah, she looked unbelievable and it was very much like, oh yeah, Rose knew. Yeah, yeah. Of course Rose knows because they have to set it up. Yeah, because otherwise it is breaking and entering. Yeah, yeah, exactly. And I didn't notice, Rob, until it had happened that Rose had changed our bedside lamps. Right, okay. Because Mr Blobby was coming in and she'd been warned that furniture might be smashed.

So they'd sent her some cheap bedside lamps. So did Mr Blobby come in? Yeah. I didn't see that on the clip I watched. No, so that's on the main TV clip, but it's not on the Instagram clip. Right, okay, I've only seen the Instagram clip and I saw the Gladiators and Alex James from Blur. I loved your little Is It Paul McCartney line, very funny.

That was a bit of fun, wasn't it? I wasn't very well, Rob.artney line. Very funny. That was a bit of fun, wasn't it? Yeah, I wasn't very well Rob. I'd I'd had Dancing all day. Yeah. Yeah, I saw how sweaty I was. I don't sweat normally when I'm asleep. Get that wristwatch off Let that pulse point breathe Do you know what I take my watch off tonight, you know if you died in your sleep right and the paramedic come I'm deaf Your deaf I take my watch off tonight. Do you know if you died in your sleep, right? And the paramedic come, right? Time of death. Your death. The paramedic would go like, oh, he's dead. And they'd go to feel a pulse. Do you know what they'd go? They'd go in front of a dead body.

They'd go, he's got his fucking watch on. And then they'd go, he must have died while he was awake. This is suspicious circumstances. Yeah, that is weird, isn't it? But then you take it off for a shower. Yeah. So if you have a shower before bed, do you take a shower before bed? Cause that's weird. Maybe you should just sweaty bastard. No, I shower in the morning. Even after a full day of dancing. Uh, so I did the full day of dancing and then I had to go straight to trick or

treating. Yeah. Which was mental. Yeah, just say you didn't wash. What? Just say you didn't wash before bed. I wouldn't have washed, no. That's disgusting. After sport, you should wash before you get into bed. I didn't know Melanie and Martina from Fun House

were coming into my fucking bedroom, Rob. It's got nothing to do with them. It's to do with you and Rose. You've got to have a shower after sport before you go to bed. I don't even do. Do you not have a shower? Do you not have a shower in the before you go bed. I don't know. Do you not have a shower in the morning? So if you go and get sweaty doing a gig or doing sport and you can't get sweaty at a gig, I've got ice cold fucking blood running through my veins.

You've done sport or the gym. So you do gym in the day. Say you do gym in the day. You come home and sweat. I'm going for a run. Yeah. I've already cleared this with Rose. Yeah.

I'm doing pickup today and then I'm going to go for a run. Right. And then you come home from the run all sweaty. What do you do? Well, me and Rose are probably bang because I look so good after a run. Yeah, once you've done that, 28 seconds later, what do you do? Make dinner for the kids. Yeah. In the sweaty clothes or do you change top? Oh no, I wouldn't change top. So you'd stay in the really sweaty... Okay, right.

It's called testosterone. I wouldn't change top. So you'd stay in the really sweaty... okay, right. It's called to tost... it's called... I can't say it... testosterone. Yeah, so you're cooking for them in your sweaty PE kit, and then they're all done and you put them to bed still wearing that smelly kit. It's not smelly, Rob. I deodorise. And then you just take that off and then get into bed and not wash. Yeah, because it's bad. This is just no, that's not. You only need a shower for bed. We are only scratching the surface here.

The wristwatch is just the tip of the iceberg. The fact that you're not washing after exercise and then getting into bed and going to sleep is mental. What are you thinking is going to happen when you sleep? Don't make me ring the office. I'm not... Rob, we've got to interview Sean Welby in 90 seconds. You're just going to be smelly and sweaty, probably get sweat rash and make the bed stink.

I've never had a sweat rash, I'm 41. Right, but you should. And actually, Rob. Do you not feel like if you've sweated into clothes and what have you, I know that it will dry, but you should wash before you get into bed. I don't think bed, I see bed really as a kind of no man's land. It's a no man's land bed. No, unbelievable. I'm absolutely shocked at this.

And we've got overtime here. We're gonna have to carry this on on Friday. Do you know what that's good podcasting Rob? Yeah, we'll have to carry it on. Maybe we should carry it on behind a paywall. That's the way things are going. Watch Josh shower behind a paywall. Right, okay.

And we'll do that for the right fee. Should we talk about McIntyre on Friday and try and put this to bed? If we are going to put it to bed, you don't need to shower. I can't believe you're not showering after running. I'm absolutely mind blown by that. I haven't got the time. You do. Mate time. So you but you when you sweat like if you go for a run and you wore like a t-shirt would you have sweat marks

all on the back and front and under the armpits? I'm pretty dry actually. Yeah but I've seen you just do a gig and that's what you sweat. That was in the drinking days Rob. But you don't oh my god. In the drinking days I would sweat a lot in bed. And I was thinking... But you sweat before you got in the bed. But why does it matter? It's a bed. We change the sheets. This is like cat drinking out the water. You're like one of the fucking Twits, you are. Right, I'll see you Friday.