Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Black Mike

Episode Date: March 18, 2019

Paul Virzi, Keith Robinson and Von DeCarlo join Bobby to judge a possible blow off on the Impractical Jokers Cruise, the merits of the music of criminals, and someone is tired of studio bullies! Learn... more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening to Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude on the Riotcast Network. Riotcast.com Oh shit! Oh that's the way to start a show, swallow your own fucking spit. I just swore. That means they're, oh my god. I'm not gonna become as popular as other shows because I'm fucking swearing, fucking too much,
Starting point is 00:00:30 fucking bobby. Other shows don't fucking swear. That's why they're more fucking popular. They talk about interesting topics like fucking the moon landing and fucking saw some fucking wings. Suck it. We're gonna talk about nothing tonight. Cool, cool.
Starting point is 00:00:46 Yes, starting out, welcome to the show. All my fans, all the fucking dudes, you know what a dude is. Yeah, you're a dude. When you feel like shit, you sad, lonely, fucked up. Your friend's suck, fucked up. Your friends suck. Family blows. Your girlfriend doesn't like anymore. Or even if your girlfriend does like you. Even if you got good friends.
Starting point is 00:01:15 Even if you got abs and you still feel like shit, you're a dude. That's what a dude is. All right? You're not the top of the heap. You're right in the middle somewhere, hovering. Fucking never gonna make it to your goals. You're never gonna achieve your full dreams, but a variation of it.
Starting point is 00:01:33 Okay? You're gonna have to watch people like fucking, fucking Obama, Bill Burr, Joe Rogan, fucking, give me a girl. Michelle Obama. Mel, no, not her. She didn't do anything. She's a wife.
Starting point is 00:01:52 But she do. Play the garden. Give me somebody good. Get who's one to woman? Oh, uh, Bri Larson. Fuck her. Now that's a Captain Marvel. I did.
Starting point is 00:02:04 I just watched it. Was it good? She's good. It was a good. It wasn't great. It was like Thor one You know it wasn't great. I mean I watched it not giving a fuck that she trashed white man white man Give a fuck whatever. You know what I mean? It's a it's a let me tell you something one to woman was the shit because one to woman Wonder Gal Gadot Gal Gadot was the shit because Wonder Woman... What was her name? Wonder... Gal Gadot. Gal Gadot. Gal Gadot was the shit because it's Wonder Woman.
Starting point is 00:02:29 It's a better character. She's more vulnerable. She's smoking hot and she can beat the shit out of any guy. But she doesn't. You know what I mean? She has a heart. Um, Captain Marvel, she's cool. She's got a chip on her shoulder.
Starting point is 00:02:44 Nobody likes anybody with a chip on their shoulder, nobody likes anybody with a chip on their shoulder Rocky didn't have a chip on his shoulder Rocky just wanted to win, you know? No, but, uh, but Paula created a chip on his shoulder fucking, a club of lang had a chip on his shoulder, nobody likes them like Rocky, I'm gonna do my best I don't know if I can make it, Adrian but I'm gonna try and the first one don't know if I can make it, Adrian, but I'm gonna try.
Starting point is 00:03:06 And the first one he did, he failed. Rocky won failed. He didn't fucking win. And we loved him for it. I love a loser, okay? I know more winners for me. I like a fucking nice hot loser. So right now, if you're in the same pants
Starting point is 00:03:21 you've been in for a week, you're under way of stinking your dick smells like a fucking lily pad. I am your guy. If you're a girl sitting on a fucking chair right now, that smells like balls, eating chips, you're lonely, you got a fucking three cats on your lap. I'm your guy.
Starting point is 00:03:41 This is your show. Okay. Yeah. As soon as you start winning, leave this show. I'll give you a pep talk. Do you want pep talks? I fucking got great pep talks. Anyways, yeah, Captain Marvel was fine.
Starting point is 00:03:54 It was fine. It was a fine show. I'd say what was fucking great? Keshwick Theater with Ron Bennington, Rich Vos, Jim Florentine, fucking great show, great crowd, everybody killed. A lot of fun. Then the next night I did Uncle Vinnie's, and I told Voss, I think I'm fucking Thursday.
Starting point is 00:04:15 I was like, yeah, it sold out. So I'm not saying, I wasn't saying it to brag. It's not a bragging thing. It's a little small clubby. Anybody could sell it up. My grandmother could fucking sell it. She's dead. Yeah, if we dug her up and said,
Starting point is 00:04:28 hey, nanny's over here. A lot of people would trouble her why? Why? Why? Yeah, so, but it was like, come down the street. It's against me. He was doing a firehouse and then he caused me up. I might stop by for what?
Starting point is 00:04:46 It's a headline get what do you don't stop by in a headline gig? What do you want to do a guest spot because your fire shit's gonna suck? Because you're gonna you're gonna take a nice hot one You know what I mean and I understand it you're gonna go to a fucking gig and down the street You know if it goes great go home if it's a little fucking rough, go down the street, jump on my show, pop on before me, fucking talk to the first five rows, murder, then get off drive home and you're poor,
Starting point is 00:05:11 and tell Bonnie, he couldn't follow me. It was his show. But I didn't let it, he walked in, walked by this, I'm murdering, fucking murdering, Mike. Destroying. Destroying any walks by the, first of all when you open an uncle Vinnie's about dang dong. So the whole fucking place is like,
Starting point is 00:05:31 who's coming so late? And then all of a sudden, the leader of the MS-13, the guy, the founder is standing in the doorway, fucking Mexican rich boss, and is Mexican regalia fucking dumb hat and his shirt pinned up to the top Bloody and blah blah blah that's there And I stand at staring at me waiting for people to recognize then he slowly walks to the crowd
Starting point is 00:05:55 Not breaking eye contact with me like he's an assassin cool. Yeah, it was fucking creepy. Just totally threw me off Right in the middle of a joke, too. Didn't wait for me to finish the joke, right in the middle, just ruined the joke for a bunch of people, then instead of going to the green room or whatever, he just did it again, walked the other way and then stood at the front of the counter, staring at me. Why?
Starting point is 00:06:16 Cause he wanted to go on stage. And he did, right? Of course he brought him up, he's rich for us, he's a legend. Hahaha, wow, I Of course he brought him up. He's rich for us. He's a legend. I would not bring him up. Of course I did. Yeah, he brought him up. He's fucking staring at me with that dumb hat.
Starting point is 00:06:34 But he did come on. I looked down. I did around 45 minutes. I was like, I'm done. Okay. You know, I can bring him up and then whatever happens happens. We did around 25 minutes. It was fucking hilarious.
Starting point is 00:06:44 That's amazing. Oh my God, was he funny? You know, how funny was that, Mike? Oh, you and Vos, that was amazing. We put some of it on Instagram. Yeah, we couldn't put it all on it. It was so politically incorrect. Obviously. It was fucking terrible. The shit we were saying, and everybody was fucking hilarious. Versi. Hello. Yeah, the shit we were saying and everybody was fucking there is verzy Yeah, the shit we were saying on stage boss came on stage with me uncle Vinnie showed up for Saturday night Minute we're live right now you don't have to whisper I'm talking into the mic you think I talked you through the microphone. We think I'm an asshole Well Keith is coming up
Starting point is 00:07:25 Yeah, do you want me to let's any more questions? Do you need anything else? You got to pick up his? Yeah, but I'll tell you. What the fuck? Would you get that hoodie? Is that tan? It's nice, don't, don't. We'll get into it.
Starting point is 00:07:35 We're going to get it. Wow. There's a casual got there right now. Blow that up motherfucker. Look at me. That's why I tell everybody. Anytime I take a selfie. There's a cashewick up there right now blow that up motherfucker It's opposite look at me. That's why I tell everybody anytime I take a selfie look at the camera not at you because you look blind and this dumb fat blind Bob Kelly Look at boss. Yeah, boss looks confused. Why do I look the why do I look like a ghost? Boss getting backstreet boy eyes. I like it. Yeah, what a great photo Great photo.
Starting point is 00:08:05 I was like, we gotta take this photo. In comics suck. Why, why do we gotta, why do we gotta, why, shut up? Because you get a moment like that, you fucks. I know what I'm doing. I know what I'm doing. Just let me do it. I put the show together.
Starting point is 00:08:22 We need the photo. So now other places want to book us, by the way. It's great. I just have to cross one of them out. They don't want, you know, it's gotta be a three-man show. What? What? Anyways, yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:34 Fantastic. Love Ron Battington. God, fucking great, this guy. Except his compliments are the worst. What do you mean? Oh, he gave me a text message. Ron me a text message Ron bending his senses last night I love now. I love Ron. Ron is the best. Ron's great the best Sounds me this last night ready Friday was a blast buddy. You are as good as anyone who walks out on stage
Starting point is 00:09:02 The fuck is that That's half done What the fuck is that? That's half done. That's half done. Yeah, yeah. That's half done. I, okay, it's going on. You can't put that front of me, yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:12 All right, listen. Well, what kind of compliment? I'll read it again, Versey. Yeah, I just, listen. I try to question if that compliment was backhand. Like, fuck off. You are as good, word good. Nobody likes the word good when you murder. You are as good as anyone good. Nobody likes the word good when you murder.
Starting point is 00:09:25 You are as good as anyone who walks out as anyone, the word good in anyone. As anyone works on stage. Does that mean anybody that walks on stage, I'm as good as them. There's three things that are happening here. Thank you. You guys know what's happening here.
Starting point is 00:09:38 I'm gonna tell you what's happening here. Three things are happening here, okay? Hope it swears the third one. No, no, first of all, this fucking thing. Sweater should never match like a gold watch. Well, no, I got the drawings on No, no. First of all, this fucking thing. Sweater should never match like a gold watch. Well, no, I got the Jordan's on to it, I match it. But anyway, I got it.
Starting point is 00:09:50 Three things are happening here. Yeah. What he's doing is this. It's either Ron, it's either Ron didn't word it right, okay, and screwed up. Or Ron was being, you know, he's either passive aggressive joking or he was just saying giving you a compliment or Bobby is trying to do that That thing where like you know you got you mean if Bobby might be trying to take something from Ron Personally that he said that was kind of funny that I really don't care about
Starting point is 00:10:19 Bring it on a show add it and and add fucking content to the radio show that I'm doing right now So it's father and funny so you can chime in. Everybody can kind of chime in with either Ron's and Asso or Ron's and Asso. And we can kill around 15 minutes of this fucking show. So I can go home and make my father and the fans will be happy. First of all, you're not going home because you're smoking number one. Number two, I think that's probably the third option. What do you just say?
Starting point is 00:10:41 If I'm thinking I'm not a magician. Cause you fucking reveal all my illusions. What the fuck, man? What the fuck is there? It's good to see you. It's been a while. Yeah, but you know something, just something bothering me, Bobby. We don't talk, you know.
Starting point is 00:10:57 Buddy, you've been started. I'm gonna tell you why. I think it's you. I think it's you. You know why? Oh, call you back every time. No, do you? Buddy, yeah, every single fucking time
Starting point is 00:11:04 I pick up the phone. If I could pick up the phone and you call it, pick it up, if not, I call you right back. And you did the wedding, right? You were busy all that week. I was on the road. Yeah. And then this week, I was busy again on this week.
Starting point is 00:11:24 Yeah. Okay. Yeah, we're just busy, dude. Yeah, we're was busy again on this week. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, we're just busy, dude. Yeah, we're just busy. That's it. No reason to read into it. Yeah, you read into it. I'm actually reading into something that needs to be read into.
Starting point is 00:11:33 Okay. And you're deterring from it. Okay, go ahead. I'm sorry. If that's a word. Yep. It's a word. You are as good as anyone who walks on stage.
Starting point is 00:11:42 That means anyone. You walk on stage. That means Gabby and stage. That means anyone you walk on stage. Yeah, that means Gabby and Mike. That means Chris. I think I think only a lunatic takes it like that. But you're taking this. Okay, this is a typical Bobby thing to, okay, because I'm telling the David Zucker story now after this now, I have to tell that story. Okay, I have to tell that story because this is what this is what Bobby that I think is another thing and another thing is another thing and two things are different than both. You don't have it in you. You're not capable
Starting point is 00:12:11 of going man. Ron's a nice guy. You know, fuck you. Just saying it. No, I mean with this thing. I know you know, I need to stop you right now. Before you go any further with this, Ron Bennington, it listen, this is why it bother Ron. It doesn't really bother me. Ron Bennington, it listen, this is why it bother, it doesn't really bother me. Ron Bennington is my, literally top five people. No, let me finish. Being dramatic, let me be dramatic. Go ahead, go for it. I'm an actor, let me do this. For sure.
Starting point is 00:12:39 All right. The look of the skull. Well, if it was the fifties I wouldn't hit her out, but please I was right there. I listen to me Love Ron best. Yeah, so I mean, of course I'm joking with Ron. I actually sent it back to him. I was like, what the fuck was that? Great show.
Starting point is 00:13:11 I'll look at that picture, look at that. And Ron, fucking killed. Ron went on after flowing. Boss went up annihilated. I'm gonna go up first and host. You just told us that we're all, you're better than everybody on the, we don't even compare to you.
Starting point is 00:13:28 You've been telling me from years how you're better than me. Why are you not headlining? I don't wanna follow your energy. I don't wanna follow your crowd work. I don't do any. You said you're the best top three crowd guy in the city. He lived in Vegas too, remember? Oh my god, remember?
Starting point is 00:13:45 Oh my god, remember? Every night, Vosko's out murder, it's 14 murders. Ron Bennington goes out, I can't, I'm telling you man, one of the funny skies, holy shit. Ron Bennington stand up is just, it's because he's on the radio, people don't know. I went into the cellar the other night
Starting point is 00:13:59 and the place, the VU was just hailing. And like as you're walking down the stairs, a place is rocking. I'm like, who's that it was fucking Ron yeah just killing fire killing man hopefully we can do more of these shows but all right we'll segue into we'll move on the shows this weekend was great awesome time we're gonna be doing more of these shows uh with the uh with that team of old fucking decrepit assholes. Um, so great show, man. Okay, so what was this guy's name?
Starting point is 00:14:28 Oh, yeah, yeah. So, no, let me tell my version and then you could tell your version, is that fair? I don't think so. I think you should tell my version first. Number one, I'll tell you why. Well, it's, we have different versions. I know, but we also have different podcasts
Starting point is 00:14:42 and you happen to be on mine. Okay. That is my head right there. Look at the size of that head. I get it, but I know what I saw that day different podcasts and you happen to be on mine. Okay. That is my head right there. I get it. Look at the size of that head. I get it, but I know what I saw that day and I saw the lunacy. I know what I felt. Alright.
Starting point is 00:14:51 Alright. Here's what happened. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Here's what happened. Can I tell you, let me tell my side first. Oh my God. You want to tell me? You're, how could your side come?
Starting point is 00:15:03 Cause I know what happened. And I'll tell your side too. But no, you don't mind side. I'm telling my God. You're gonna let, how could your side come? Cause I know what happened. And I'll tell your side too. But no, you gotta go on my side. I'm telling my side. Let me preface it for, no, let me just tell my side. And then I think yours will be funnier at the after. I think it'll be funnier if I tell my side. Cause that's what, oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:15:19 And then when you tell your side, you're gonna be like, this is what really happened. Okay, go ahead. Does that make sense? Yeah, go ahead. So if we're doing a documentary, we tell, oh, then this happened, then this, and then it comes in.
Starting point is 00:15:30 You're right, though, because in a documentary, the real thing happens second. That's not okay. So, I think I said that by accident, but that's not what I meant. A gold hoodie, really tan? It's tan.
Starting point is 00:15:40 Yeah, you're not a tan guy, dude. You see your Italian. That's a blonde guy. Gabby could wear that. That's my character. Chris could wear that guy dude. You're a talent. That's a blonde guy Gabby could wear that That's my Chris could wear that you can't we are dark. You're Greek and Italian I can't you know why cuz I keep wearing other shit I had this shit laying there and I always go black. I always go gray. I always go brown And I just went for yeah, you know, I just fucking went for it
Starting point is 00:15:59 And I put the fucking Jordans on and and you're giving me shit for the hood sound like Christie cellos dating choices put the fucking Jordans on and you're giving me shit for the hood. Sound like Christie cello's dating choices. Oh, I love Christie, by the way. Don't get mad. Fucking the girls were brought to attack. What'd you say about Christie? So go, you want to give your version first? Yeah, my version.
Starting point is 00:16:15 Okay. Practical joke is to us, to our tour, right? Night before I'm there, a stay cause for my best friend, Mike Calta. Fucking is your best friend? He's top two. Okay. He flips between one and two.
Starting point is 00:16:28 Okay. Yeah, okay. Sorry. No, that's fine. I thought it was a strong thing, you know? I mean, you were, you live in Florida and you never fucking see it. I mean, you're best friend.
Starting point is 00:16:36 You were the fucking South Salem. You throw me on the bus right here on my show. So, no, no, no, I'm just saying, we'll smoke more cigars together than you and Mike do. That's all. Charlie, I know, I know, I knew we're having where there's distance between Something's happened I'm a
Starting point is 00:16:54 World I know I know I know I know That's because I love it's because I love like I heard I got her I got I got a motion I got feelings I got fucking feelings. He says I'm insecure. You got that fucking So I'm insecure. That's why you were that sweaty you needed a hug Fucking ruffles with a ruffles. No, there's no ruffles elastic fucking wrist. Who does that? What do you Magnum? P.I. Listen Okay, any hot there's no bag of money. He has a 10 you have a 10 barracuda
Starting point is 00:17:22 Yeah, I'm a barracuda What are you fucking? Big fan died just what? I just want to do it. I know. I just wanted to change up the shade. To what? Just a little lighter.
Starting point is 00:17:33 Just go a little lighter. We started to do colleges. Oh my god. It's hilarious. All right. Here we go. So we, I, I, I, I, I, Versus coming in. I mean, listen, first thing I'm doing is Versus.
Starting point is 00:17:44 Where you going? What do you, I'm here. I'm on's coming in. I mean listen first thing I'm doing is verse. Where you going? What do you I'm here? I'm on them. Yeah, I'm at a steakhouse just come here and meet us here. Okay, comes in. We have a steak dinner Yeah, I introduced my worlds my guy down there and my guy up here that they should know each other because you know He's doing comedy now the blah blah mic's number one show. have dinner. Mike picks up the tab. What a fucking swell guy. Great guy. Go back to the place. Next day we'll leave him. I wake up in the morning.
Starting point is 00:18:12 I come out, I see Verzy. Now everybody's in the lobby, all the comics. And my pal, right? Close friend Verzy, you heard how he was. He just got hurt. I mean, got hurt. Got hurt because I said my colta was my best friend. You got hurt from that.
Starting point is 00:18:26 Now imagine my fucking heart, heart. When I come in the lobby and I see my great friend, maybe best friend flip flop every once in a while. And I see him talking to this old guy. And he looks at me, you know, okay. And he looks at me, like makes eye contact. Doesn't say, hey, morning Bob, come over here. Come over here come over here
Starting point is 00:18:45 So I let him go my god. What the fuck was that? I looked right at him. He didn't say nothing Not even a fucking head nod and then walk by again. I look over again Make eye contact again, but he like literally looks quick away back to the conversation like this conversation is fucking vital more vital than a good morning to your friend who fucking in like as soon as you landed Please come have steak with us meet my other friend. Please can I I want you to meet this guys Now I'm gonna help you sell your shows are he's the best Smoke this a garden I before talking about friendship Friendship next day you wake up. I guess friendship, you know, goes to sleep and sometimes it doesn't wake up
Starting point is 00:19:28 The same time you wake up because this guy whoever this fucking old guy is versus locked in Do not lock me can't wait to go locked You remember watching wrestling and the tag team, I wasn't getting killed and the guys waiting, and he's just waiting, that's what I'm doing right now. I'm tired. And I finally go,
Starting point is 00:19:56 I finally get, I'm talking to everybody, everybody's a Bob at Carmen, everybody's like, hi Bob, and look up, all these other people who aren't my best, what, I'm one of my fucking great friends, all over me, hi, Bob, oh, these other people who aren't my best, well, I'm one of my fucking great friends, all over me, all over Bob Kelly, except the one guy who has your heart.
Starting point is 00:20:12 Right. I say, oh, Verzy, I screamed to this guy. I go, Verzy, he's gotta be famous. Oh, you're ignoring me. You know, I don't know what you're doing. Either you're talking to a famous, and you know, and it just just so happened it was a famous guy So I was on the fucking nose guys. I'm avoiding I tell intact with Paul right now. I know, okay
Starting point is 00:20:34 So he's it was a famous guy he was fucking He was in the conversation with somebody But the conversation with that person because of who they were okay, was more important than a good morning to you. I had not. Can I go? My muscles. As your ribs by the way, it's bad. The muscles are off. My back muscles are off. And I'm like, I mean, what the? And I'm joking, of course. First of all, in practical jokers, I mean, it's pretty much that's the thing that they do is y'all shit out and fuck with people. I mean, and we're all comics.
Starting point is 00:21:17 So, you know, it's not like, it's not like the head of, it's a Samsung convention. And they're introducing the new foldable phone. And he's talking to the engineer that invented the foldable phone and he's always wanted a photo and he and he and It's not you know, it's not a fucking Catholic event Okay Okay, so so I says hang on those are pause. Okay. It was a pause to let every absorb, but I just said okay, so I says Hang on, those are pause. Okay. Those are pause to let every absorb what I just said So I says
Starting point is 00:21:50 So I said that I said was he that you see somebody famous or you're fucking ignore me because I mean I can't take away your twice and you fuck a Blume off Jersey Right which is a fact Okay, that is a fact So I will I will I I will yield to the freshman senator. Thank you. I will yield to you right now. Okay, before I address this court,
Starting point is 00:22:13 everybody knows it works with Bobby. You know Bobby, right? No, no, no, no, no, no, that's leading the witness. Leading the fucking witness. That's neither here or near. We're talking about, you can't listen to me. You can't get up there, fucking past, fucking indiscretions with me. Okay.
Starting point is 00:22:28 Okay. All right. So here's what happens. He's absolutely right about the beginning of this, he's absolutely right about the beginning of this night. As a matter of fact, we talk two days before, hey, when you come in, meet me wherever you are, we're definitely going to smoke when we get to, when we get to Florida. We get to Tampa.
Starting point is 00:22:42 Sure. He goes, matter of fact, I'm at the thing, don't even go to the hotel, go to the steakhouse. We go to the steakhouse, steakhouse is great, great steaks. My call to take care of the bill, everything's great. Then, a little part that you left out, you did say that we talked at the, you did say that we talked at the pool.
Starting point is 00:22:56 We spent many hours at the pool. We were talking, we were talking about comedy, we were talking about life, we were smoking cigars. No other comedians were there, okay? And we're having a really good time. We're having a really good time at the pool. Yeah. It's okay.
Starting point is 00:23:12 We're having a really good time at the pool, right? Yeah. And then we go back to the rooms, we say whatever, you came to the room, whatever, we did something with... One second, we're fighting. So we're fighting right now. And Keith's a good, because this is what Keith's gonna do.
Starting point is 00:23:28 You know, you think he's gonna go on your side, or you think he's gonna, you never know. He's gonna, he's gonna take a left. What are y'all fighting for? We're fighting. How are you? Because he said I did something in Tampa, and I'm gonna tell you the story, okay?
Starting point is 00:23:40 So I get to Tampa, meet him the night before we're about to go, the next day we're going on the impractical jokers cruise. Okay, so we're all gonna take a shuttle from the Tampa hotel to the impractical jokership and we're gonna go set sail with the impractical jokers. Their annual cruise, okay. And help him with that shit. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no white woman. He's a good-natured person. I don't lie on white women. I don't want help anymore.
Starting point is 00:24:06 Why? No, because I don't. It's not a shake-o-no. It's a lot of shit going on. What do you mean there's a lot of shit going on? You know, white women and black men. What? Through the years.
Starting point is 00:24:17 Nothing's happened. You heard me make sure. You heard me make sure. You heard me make sure. I'm gonna be trying to accuse me of some shit. Well, she can accuse you of. She knows. What? Not answering my phone calls.
Starting point is 00:24:25 That's what I was just accusing him of downstairs. Thank you. Good, we have more fights that we have to deal with cause of this fucking shower. You heard about it. I'm gonna deal with you after this. You trying to trade it back on? Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:36 It should have traded. Okay, yeah, I like it. We're taking this world war fast. So let me. Yeah, okay. So. Yeah. We get to the hotel night before.
Starting point is 00:24:44 Yeah. And me and Bobby have a great night the night before outside smoking outside So Gar talk and hang and everything now if you remember I did mention to you prior Hey, the guy David Zucker who's on this thing the guy made airplane and naked guns two of my fucking all time Yeah, these movies airplane naked guns are in my top 10, are my top fucking 10, and I tell you, the director and writer of these movies is on the ship. Okay, so just know that I know that this guy, and what I said, and when you said that, what did I do? You kinda shit on, you kinda, you guys care.
Starting point is 00:25:15 It doesn't do anything to me. But it did for me, and I said I grew up with this, okay? But okay, so we spent a night together. But stop right there, because you just made a valid fucking point for me. Okay, okay, so we do night together, but stop right there because you just made a valid fucking point for me Okay, how okay because you Oh Whoo and you said it to me and I was like yeah, all right whatever So you know that when you when I rolled in and you're with fucking Zuckerberg
Starting point is 00:25:39 Is that his name? Oh, it's okay Zucker Zucker and I saw you I have to say Zuckerberg I don't know trying to enhance it. What are you? I'm not gonna talk to me. What are you fucking NPR? Speed it up. I You sound like you're anti-Semitic. See, I told you. He's not gonna come in and play by the rules and deal with the conversation We haven't he's gonna call me a Nazi. He's got Zuckerberg. So let me let me a Nazi. He's got. You got a sucker bird. So let me ask you a question real quick. Yes.
Starting point is 00:26:07 What movie growing up when you were a kid? Yeah. 12, 13, 14 is all that you ain't, right, porkeys. Yeah. Now if the director and writer of porkeys was on that ship and you knew it, and you knew it, Animal House and porkeys and all that shit. He was there.
Starting point is 00:26:20 Okay, and you said to me that now. All right, you want to answer to that? Ask me that question. You want the answer? We can end this whole thing right now. What, I have to follow. And. All right, you want to answer to that? Ask me that question. You want the answer? We can end this whole thing right now. What, I have to follow. End it right now, okay, good. Bob, the director's on his way upstairs from 40s
Starting point is 00:26:32 to do the podcast. Yeah, I'll give a fuck. You guys are here. He can't, it's full. Oh shit. Yeah, it's full. My friends are here. Tell them he can't come up.
Starting point is 00:26:42 Tell them. And to be fair, I would give my seat. Well, of course you would. I'm course you are the fuck right out of here a second I was trying to be on your side get those tips to the couch no against Keith not you I'm still listening to y'all story so me and so me and Bobby we have a great time the night before no other comics come out like they all of them came in that night they're all in hotel. Me and Bobby are just out by the pool.
Starting point is 00:27:05 Smoke it's a car. Talking life. Having a great time. Talking. Following morning, we got to be down in the lobby and we got to get on to the shuttle to go to the ship to go on this cruise. I get down there first. And I see workers of the impractical jokers cruise.
Starting point is 00:27:21 And I see an older man and I recognize that his David Zucker and he's over there and he's doing something with his paper And I walk over and the guy says, oh, this is Paul Versey He's one of the comedians that'll be on the ship blah blah blah David Zucker comes over and goes, oh, yeah I remembered one guy before two years ago. I only saw one name. I recognize big J nice to meet you Everything like that. My name is David. I said, no, who you are. I love your work. We start talking. Okay, and I find out that he Is somebody that used to be very liberal. And he has now moved over to the conservative side. And he was saying, it's really hard. What
Starting point is 00:27:51 you guys got going on as comedians now, you can't say, you can't say what you want to say as a comic anymore. Is that really fucked up? No, I didn't fucking make sound effects. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That's not a long set up. But I'm with you. There's no no, there's no joke. It's not a joke. I said. I wasn't. But I'm telling you, if you mother fucking. So I'm having this great conversation. To be fair, to be fair, it has put me to sleep, to be fair. Paul, I'm with you. I'm totally listening.
Starting point is 00:28:21 You know, I don't even want to fucking tell a story anymore. I know, tell it. Thanks for covering those up. Listen, I, so no, so he's, want to tell a story anymore. I know. Tell it. Thanks for covering those up. Listen, I know. So no, so he's having a good thing. And he's like, you guys can't say what you want anymore. This political correctness is gone.
Starting point is 00:28:31 I mean, you can't say what you want because I said something to him and he fucking flips out. Well, he got upset with you. Yeah. But you guys just don't know. Yeah. Soccer got a noise with Bob. Yes.
Starting point is 00:28:42 I'll tell you why. So this one, I'm going to tell him why he was an air with my story I get a dad get me to my story as I'm have then I then we start having a rapport and then I go man Airplane is one of my airplane is what I'm like, we start to have a really nice fucking thing here So I'm like you would you have a report you was kissing Paul stay fuck it stay focus. It's a report. I'm with you. I'm with you. I'm sticking on my shit. I go for focus Look at my eyes. I'm right here. So poor we start Airplane make it gun one so we're talking and then he goes let me ask you questions
Starting point is 00:29:19 You think I can make airplane? Sorry, you guys do you think I can make airplane today now a Do you think I can make airplane today? Nowadays, you think I'd be able to get away with those jokes because they were racial jokes. And as we're talking, the fucking elevator bit, you know, you're ding and fucking Bob, by the way, he's fucking 60 yards away. He's far away and he comes walking out
Starting point is 00:29:37 and I make eye contact with him, far away if he's been the whole fucking night. And I just look at him like, oh, Bobby's down and I'm finishing the conversation. So then Bobby walks by again and he starts walking over towards the comedians. And I'm just still talking to this guy. And Bobby goes after a minute, hey, verse, he's famous, right? He's famous.
Starting point is 00:29:53 So I'm just curious why, why? Not so true. No, yes you do. I said it twice. I looked at you twice. I contact twice. As I walked down, I walked out of it. I was excited to see you.
Starting point is 00:30:04 Bloom me off. So I was like, all right. And I walked over to the common lunch. He's still talking. So I'm like, all right, cool. I mean, dude, we were hanging out all night. Staying restaurant. So guys, friendship, best movie together. David Zucker. Let me do car wheels for a second because my friend just came up with a fucking thing. I mean, what I want to do about this. How about this? How what am I supposed to do? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this?
Starting point is 00:30:26 How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this?
Starting point is 00:30:33 How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this?
Starting point is 00:30:40 How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? How about this? and blew me off. I go, oh, Verzy, you must be famous or something because you blew me off twice now. Twice you've looked me in the eye. I think it was a little bit. And blew me off like that.
Starting point is 00:30:48 It was a little more invasive. And I go, and I go like this, all right. Okay, Verzy, do you think fucking Hollywood? Yeah, he goes, no, he goes, but I was, I was, he was half joking. I was fucking, of course, there was a little bit of realness in there. Oh, I know.
Starting point is 00:31:01 He had those shark eyes just now. Because, because, listen, there I listen to where does funny lie? But here in the truth thank you. Thank you now stop talking. I would be that's it. He said it the truth. Okay, he goes. No, he's famous right, Versey. He's okay. I just want to be quick because you ignore me twice and David Zucker goes Wow, David Zucker goes you like who you know him and I go yeah, that's my friend. Yeah God forbid It's a comic God forbid it's a fucking comedian fucking with his friend on a comedy cruise What am I supposed to do? What do we have in T. Are we English? He my fucking Italian Greek friend that I smoked cigars with we were trashing everybody the night before having a good time
Starting point is 00:31:41 I walk out he ignores beat twice doesn't say and then I fucking bust his balls and it is somebody famous. I didn't even know was Zuckerberg I thought it was just soccer whatever the fuck his name is I didn't even know was his name Do you know how I even know the fuck who he was and it was my instincts as a comic? What the bathroom is right in there my instincts as a comic, the bathroom is right in there. My instincts as a comic were right on the fucking mind. Who know my man, I let you fuck it. Talk them, let me get out of your head. Talk about how far the elevator was, but you were a fucking you and his big.
Starting point is 00:32:18 It was a big way, man. It wasn't a fool. It was far away. No, it wasn't. So you had about an overhouse, I would have still talked to you. Thank you. Before I pop yourself. I agree with you had about an overout. I would have still talked. Thank you. Before I agree with you, Bobby. Thank you. And Alex. It's not fun argument. We were having just before we walked in here when I sat down at the
Starting point is 00:32:37 table downstairs at the seller said, Hey, key, key, hey, Keith, what's up? How are you? He did not even say one fucking word. And then- But here's the thing. I explode it in the air. You wanna know the difference? Yeah. You know what the difference?
Starting point is 00:32:51 Yeah. Yeah, I mean, y'all have got both of you, I have tits. But the difference is, it's not true. But the difference is, she's a female. She loves the tits. I know it's better than for an female. She's one of the tits. I was giving out his-
Starting point is 00:33:03 I was giving out his- I was giving out his- I was giving out- First of all, you're not going to get me against my friend Keith. I'm going to let him. You're not going to get me against my friend Paul. You just dig you through one of the bus calls. I didn't throw you under the bus. I literally said, I was important. You said I was right.
Starting point is 00:33:11 I said acknowledgement is important, but I didn't say that I didn't understand. Yeah, I think that's my point. You know what? And I also want to say, you're a point of view. And fuck him. You know what? I'm going to say that I'm a point of view. I'm going to say that I'm a point of view.
Starting point is 00:33:24 I'm going to say that I'm a point of view. I'm going to say that I'm a point of view. I'm going to say that I'm a point of view. I'm going to say that I'm a point of view. I'm going't say that I didn't understand. Yeah, I didn't. That's my point. You know what, and I also understand. Yes, I think acknowledgement, you gotta. And fuck him, you ain't gotta say, yeah. You gotta, you gotta. Fuck you, he doesn't have to say how do you, I'm the fuck. I was, you got tits too, Keith.
Starting point is 00:33:36 I was, I got titlers, that's smaller tits. Yeah, I did, at least I tits a sexy. You have fucking, you have training, bro. I'll give you this, Bobby. Bobby, I'll give you this. What? Maybe what I could have At least I did the sexy. You have fucking, you have training, bro. I'll give you this, Bobby. Bobby, I'll give you this. What? Maybe what I could have done is I could have definitely when you came off, could have went like that.
Starting point is 00:33:50 I could have done that. I could have done that. That would be good enough, Bob. Good. It's perfect. It's perfect. I spent the night with each other. I think it was, you know what I honestly think it was.
Starting point is 00:33:58 And you know what, I get it. I think what it was was right as that came out, he asked me, do you think I can make airplane today? And I'm thinking about it going, this fucking guy who I love his movies, he asked me, so I can't. That's a real thing. Well, they see Bob coming out and fucking all over it.
Starting point is 00:34:12 Hey, hey, he just got the fuck outta here. Hey, you know, that's what it is. He didn't want me ruining his fucking night. His new friend, he didn't want Bob coming over. His new friend isn't a cast on an airplane too. He casted him in shit. He made a shit. You can't make Bob Kelly coming over. No friend is in a castle, an airplane too. Ain't casting him in shit. You can't make movies with him anymore. But why do you let him have a joy?
Starting point is 00:34:32 Buddy, I didn't want to just stop you right now. I'll answer the question. Let me answer the question. I didn't know he was having his joy. You said you said you had a joy. Yeah, let me finish. I didn't know who the guy who knew your baby girl. Let me finish. She didn't know who the guy you know your baby girl. Let me finish. Oh, no one's somebody else. She's with somebody else
Starting point is 00:34:47 Well, I didn't know who it was until the second until the second eye contact blow off and the lobby buddy It's a marry operative where it was and listen to me. It's a courtyard married. It's not a season The lobby's nice because it's real so he's a lion, okay? We're right there. And then the Zuckerberg guy, hey, Zucker, whatever his name is, you, you made, you made the greatest comment, some of the greatest comedy movies of all time. Maybe you have a sense of humor. Oh, no, I'm knowing that I'm fucking with him. Whoa, he said that? No, he didn't say. No, he just, he didn't like you. Well, I Well I asked no he didn't and then I saw him in the water later that week we're in a
Starting point is 00:35:27 bottom where are you behind the homies yeah. I'm out there smokeless a guy in a floaty right. He comes out that's got a really nice family but he came out then and he was still pissed and I went listen relax it's over I go come on forget it I was because he was still throwing zings yeah because he said like all you need to learn etiquette It's over. I go, come on, forget it. I was fucking. Zucker, I heard that. Because he was still throwing zings. Yeah, because he said like, all you need to learn etiquette. He was like kind of like trying to have Joe, but he was upset.
Starting point is 00:35:52 Yeah, he was trying to, I was like, all right, relax. Yeah, because I don't care. You told Zucker to relax. You definitely, you definitely. I don't. You definitely, I've found out that he doesn't like comedians, by the way. Really? Fucking hates us
Starting point is 00:36:08 He goes I would never cast a comic in a movie. I only Comic really said that he goes oh, oh, it's what I got only comic actors When did he say that? And the water he was talking to the the writers and show you blew his shot, too Now when you blow your Yeah, but I actually got a shot cuz I was like I started an improv Yeah, but I actually got a shot because I was like I started an improv Comic actor I agree with you. I agree with you comics are not good I could I should you let me ask you this Keith if I gave him the nod you think it would have been here been all right I know he's just saying
Starting point is 00:36:40 The not show me the not sure. All right, so I'm talking to him. Hey, talking to him. Oh, airplane. Could I do it? So anyway, he would hate it. You know, you might have done it. You might have went like this, Bobby. You could have easily went, did you just fucking give me a little fucking?
Starting point is 00:36:55 Yeah, I say something. When we reenact it and you're the actor in it, could you look at me and I'm right here? Yeah, I'd be trying to say you were in the role. Okay, I did the same right now. Look at me, Versa. And quiet on a set. All right, here we go.
Starting point is 00:37:09 All right, so ask me, and do you think I can make airplane today? Actually, come on, man. Do you think I can make airplane today? I'm very dizzy. Oh, there he is. I know what today. What's up, buddy?
Starting point is 00:37:19 Oh, you know what? He's been calling him. I don't know, man. I don't think so. And cut. No, you're now, that's keep this thing going. Keep this thing going. you're now you're down. Let's keep the single keep the single and you're Jessica Kirsten Kirsten.
Starting point is 00:37:28 Okay, what's going on? How you doing? Sweetie, good to see you. What's first you doing over there? I have no idea. Let's stay focused. All right, let's do a baby. All right, nice.
Starting point is 00:37:36 All right, that's Cruz going to be all right. I'm going to get some coffee. You want some coffee? Absolutely. All right, cool. Hey, verse, you want coffee? I don't mean to interrupt. You want some coffee? No, no, no, no, I, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I think both of you are right and wrong at the same time. They're not right wrong at the same time.
Starting point is 00:38:06 Bob say what's going on. It's like anything. So he was wrong to get a prank. Right, he was wrong for calling. You were wrong for not acknowledging. You don't think that he should have went. He's wrong at the same time. If he's sitting there with, okay,
Starting point is 00:38:17 let me throw this scenario, you Keith. It's you come out. I'm talking to, I'm talking to, uh, Spike Lee. Wow. I'm talking to, I'm talking to Spike Lee. That really was piece of shit. Really was. First of all, I should be talking to Morgan Freeman. I'm talking to Brad that in Barack Obama. I'm gonna force Whitaker. It's talking to me with his good eye. I'm thinking to you. You come out and you see me. You see me. We hung out last night.
Starting point is 00:38:53 You see me. And I blow you off. I don't even fucking wave to you. I don't say shit to you. Keith, if you come out in the lobby, has my friend. You're the closest motherfucker to me right now. Right? We're in a lobby a bunch of comics
Starting point is 00:39:05 I know everybody we're close, but you're You weren't you're a soldier me and you were soldiers. I like Morgan Freeman. No, that's first I wasn't we weren't the closest to get we weren't close You wouldn't have been you wouldn't have been if I was like yo Keith come here, man Come here. You got to meet Keith funny guy the reason here this scenario here this scenario Watch this you're me I'm you You're Morgan Freeman. Yo man. I like those freckles Yeah, man the freckles are like well in 19 and you do
Starting point is 00:39:36 Well, you're me you're me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh you got me this guy verse come here This is one of the funniest guys walking great friend of mine. What am I supposed to do? Come over here, dude. You got to meet him, man. This is Morgan Freeman. You have a meat, this Morgan Freeman. Nice to meet you. Morgan Freeman. No, you can't be.
Starting point is 00:39:53 No, you can't be. He can't. I like the night before. I like your frackals. But Bobby, what if something consciously? I'm gonna stake dinner with my friend Mike. Stake dinner. What do I do?
Starting point is 00:40:05 What do I do, Keith? What do I do, Keith? What do I do? I'm gonna say you invite it, Paul. Yeah. We had a great dinner and we had a great talk, but what if subconsciously I say Bobby, this guy's sucker, man, I love what he does. And so you actually thought Bob was cock-blocking you.
Starting point is 00:40:19 Oh. No, I thought. Oh no. No Johnny Cockchran caught you, motherfucker. It cannot be no reason that you don't introduce your friend. Thank you. Robert Kelly. Why can't I hear of your life? Why can't we both stop what you're in my life?
Starting point is 00:40:36 I'm too busy doing what? I could have, well first of all, he asked me a question. During that time, he asked me a question. Yoppin, you were an answer like this. What? Ha, ha, Nancy like this. Like a fucking I'm not gonna lie. I was fucking deaf to the shit. Because crunch.
Starting point is 00:40:52 Yeah, but here's the thing if Keith if that did he said no and the reason is because Keith will do that too and he wouldn't feel no way about it. He pulled the top pop on me. He didn't. He wouldn't be mad. If I ignore Keith, he wouldn't be mad. He wouldn't even bring it up. Because he does that to me sometimes too. But I'm sensitive. Keith is an a sensitive person. I'm sensitive. Why am I talking? I would have felt like mad not being acknowledged. But I don't think Keith will be mad if you don't
Starting point is 00:41:20 know. I spent the night together. Where am I supposed to do it? We don't spend the night. We don't know the night before. We didn I spent the night together Well sure Bobby so prideful he couldn't be gay with a jerk off because he would be like why do I gotta jerk you Nobody would get jerked off because he would go to I'm just saying I'm just saying Keith. I would introduce you. Yeah. I was just a shit a real quick introduction then you had to beat it. Hey, what's up? Yeah, hey, what's up? He was busy. He was 20 30 yards down there Yeah, I was on a football fucking field. It's a We were the fucking
Starting point is 00:42:16 Immigrant Joe Gersworth I could have Intrustrated the hotel They barely have a lobby It's a court yard. There we are. What are you talking about? Get in there and breakfast. Keith, let me ask you a question. Okay, I'm gonna ask you a question.
Starting point is 00:42:29 I'll be honest, be honest. Okay, who's your favorite cowboy ever? Who's your favorite cowboy ever? My favorite cowboy ever, we Tony Dorset. Okay, so that's too much, because I don't put Zucker there. Who's your, you like Irving? Yeah, my brother.
Starting point is 00:42:41 Okay, so if you and Bobby hung out by a pool the night before, Smokster Garza had a good night, how to stay cows did all that and you mentioned to him, hey man, I heard Michael Irvin is going to be on the ship tomorrow. That'd be cool. And then you go to the lobby first and who's there? You and Michael Irvin go, hey man, it's one of the comedians of Michael Irvin and you start talking to him and Michael Irvin goes, hey Keith, yeah man, you, uh, you do stand-up
Starting point is 00:42:59 and everything. Did you have a play that club in Dallas and you start talking and then Bobby gets off the elevator down there and you just look and you see Bobby. What are you doing while he's saying that to what are you doing? I'm waiting for a bob to come when he gets in. Yeah. I'm his friend. He's waiting for me to go Bob.
Starting point is 00:43:13 Come in man. Let me take some. That's my color right there. Let me take something great. Keith would expect you to like watch call to the situation like LeBron James came to the comedy celebrity. Yeah. And Kev was engaged with LeBron James.
Starting point is 00:43:29 But soon as I walked through, he said, hold up. This is Keith. This LeBron. This is the guy who taught me all that I had no due. God, God, God, God, God. Look at that. See, so I'm now in my piece of shit, you know? I can't even, I can't.
Starting point is 00:43:44 Hang on one second. Hang on one second hang on one second I should have fucking gave a head nod. I can't fucking believe it You didn't give the head nod Paul, but I don't think it was malicious. Of course it was not my list I think you apologize and I never do it again. Oh shit case fucking closed What is closed because you know what can you do that for Keith? Oh shit. Case fucking closed. What? Case closed. Cause you know what, can you do that for Keith? Can I, is he saying, what is his saying? Let me, let me throw him a bad hand.
Starting point is 00:44:13 Yeah, he said, is he to life for this? Or is he just a six month sentence? Like what's the sentence? You're outta here. If he can do it. If he can do it. I can hit this thing. I want you outta this fucking.
Starting point is 00:44:24 You're home free. I can smash it. If I can hit this thing, I want you out of this fucking- Your home free. You're fucking smashin' your home free, Paul. There you go. Come on. Come on. Come on. Oh, y'all row! Now look at what you got close.
Starting point is 00:44:36 Now stop. Now do it again, do it again. If you smashed that wine glass, I'm gonna fucking lose it. What was that? Yes, now look at what you're holding. Look at the end of it. Let's hold it. Look at what you're holding. Look at the end of it. Let's hold it. Look at the end of it.
Starting point is 00:44:47 Look at the end of it. Hold it. Look at that. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha bigger than this never mind. No, no, no. Fuck it. In a sin conversation with a guy who made one of my boyhood favorite movies. Now we got to get nostalgic. No, can we just give the sentencing? How long do we hold this over his head, Bobby? I say, I'm done with it now that I've been pr- Now that I've been vindicated from a jury of my peers, literally,
Starting point is 00:45:23 I could say as a man, I could say that I should have definitely given you the head nod. I was too in head nod. I'm in the conversation. I had no. And the worst thing is that that is the worst thing. You know, because my cousin did that to me one time. He's like, I was with,
Starting point is 00:45:36 you don't know who Freddie C is. I'm talking about fucking Freddie C is, I'm your cousin. Yep. It allows me. Yeah, I'm your brother. I'm the road, I'm your brother. What family? I understand that. Yeah, I'm your brother. I'm on the road. I'm your brother.
Starting point is 00:45:46 I understand that. We're family on the road. When you're on the road, we have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have
Starting point is 00:45:55 to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to I said hello to me. Oh David there's a chance I could be in one different. There's nobody. There's a chance I could be in your next fucking room. Can you please tell him this? I actually heard you make another naked
Starting point is 00:46:09 gun. Can you tell him this no chance? Yeah, he's gonna be in the fucking room. Did you get your number? You have a more chance of winning a body kelly. He looked at me and goes, who's that? That's what he looked at me and goes, who's that? And I go, that's my friend, Bob, I think he just says, nobody, but nobody who's him. I looked at him and I went, who the fuck is Verzy talking to? I would defend my friend. Don't act like the fuck is,
Starting point is 00:46:33 I looked at my friend like who's that guy. You should have said, that's my friend. I said, that's my friend, he's joking. Fuck's what I said. No, no, that's one of the funniest motherfuckers going right now. That's what I would have said. Why are you not that exactly? Yeah. Or you can say he's said. Well, not that, exactly. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:45 Or you can say he's as good as you. I'm gonna say this, I'll take this. He's as good as anybody who goes on stage. Yeah. There you go. All right, you know what, you brought it full circle. I should have gave the fucking nod. I just don't, I just don't know.
Starting point is 00:46:57 All right, I agree. I agree. All right, well, I still don't think it's, you know. I agree, don't, don't, don't, don't fucking shit on the apology. Don't do it at the end. You did it with done Gavu fucking done and I hit that with but all I could I did the best I could let's uh
Starting point is 00:47:12 penis hammer what's that got oh first of all yeah, what's that guy's name? What's the guy's name? It's gone off the thing Zucker the guy we got I have to mention. Oh, I speak blast. Where is it? How did it go away? Why is it? How'd it go away? Why is it gone? Michael. I'm not sure. I'm talking to, what's his name? Aspect Blast. I wanna say a shout out to Aspect Blast for joining Patreon.
Starting point is 00:47:35 Thank you so much. You are a ultimate motherfucking dude for joining. God bless you. And I also wanna, Twitch, YKWDcast, to Twitch YKWDcast Instagram YKWD YKWDood podcast make sure you follow us on like and what do they want to do? Like and subscribe, right? Yep. Yeah, there you go. Comedy, Celle Vegas, us three are going to be there. Yes.
Starting point is 00:48:00 When is that our guy? Oh, he's the legend name. Not legend. When is that my guy? He's the legend name, not legend. Take the legend. Jesus. Rich Vicki. Oh, there it is. Shout out. Who is it?
Starting point is 00:48:11 You're going to be there at the end of May 22nd. I'm going to be there. Yeah. Yeah. May 22nd to the 22nd. Yeah. We're going to be there. Me, Verzy, Keith, and Voss, once again, which is one of the fucking greatest lineups and we're gonna make Voss close every show.
Starting point is 00:48:28 What do you think? No, fuck that. We don't let Voss close and we make him open every show. They can also open every show because he keeps yapping. Let's make him close her. I don't know how to close her. Fuck him. He opens every show. Every show.
Starting point is 00:48:43 All right, good. You're closing every show. Okay. All right. You're fucking. You're fucking married. I'm out fucking. You two assholes are coming out of the gate killing. That's in May, the second third and fourth of May, 2026. Nice talking to you. And I'm at Gotham this weekend, Friday and Saturdays. Come on, check it out. What else you got here? We got laughable all kinds of shit. con volotea. La región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Spectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sin fin de aventuras te esperan.
Starting point is 00:49:15 ¡Friparás! Vuelades de Madrid, a Murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. $19. Volotea. Staryfa sujeta a disponibilidad consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. Won't you introduce the room, man? I see a random guy setting in the corner with a pink hoodie on. What the fuck is that? Chris. What's up, Chris? What do you do, man?
Starting point is 00:49:37 Who? Designer. Designer. Designer. All right, there you go. And it's a stand-up comic. He's very funny. Oh, shit. He could have said a stand, designer. All right, there you go.
Starting point is 00:49:45 And he's a stand-up comic. He's very funny. Oh, he's shit. He could've said a stand-up comic that would've did it all. Well, Becky, say hello. Hey. Hey, Becky.
Starting point is 00:49:55 Sweet. You got mushy mic over here. You know mush. Yeah, don't call him mushy mic no more. Why? Find a new name. Now, fat tank. Fat tank.
Starting point is 00:50:04 Why do you go right for the self deprecating? Cause it was funny. And it's comfortable. What do you want to call? Ab's McGee. Got my shit together, fucking. Mike yes. Moji, Moji, Mike is shaped just like Vaughn.
Starting point is 00:50:18 That's how I put it. Tipped upside down. I can't even argue that right now. I did get a lot of weight. You look good. Thank you, Bob. You look fantastic on Instagram. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:50:31 And that camera's hanging off the ceiling. That's exactly where I'm placed. No, I'm not. You know, my, you know, my, and you got Gabby over there. Gabby. You know, she's the producer of the show, books, the show. Now I was to call you. Let me, I don't, I ignore Gabby all the Gabby, you know, she's the producer of the show, books the show, so I was to call you. Let me, I don't, I ignore Gabby all the time.
Starting point is 00:50:47 Why? She bugs me. Let's face facts. Gabby bugs me. You love me. I do love you, but you still bug me. Why do you bug me? Oh shit.
Starting point is 00:50:58 Oh, I like that. You're a bug man. She funny don, I mean, Vonges slapped her. What mother fucker? You're the fucker. Oh, stop trying to do a black voice. What? The fucker?
Starting point is 00:51:10 Yeah, that's right. The next shake was pretty good. You don't fucking talk to him like that. Batch? I was like, oh, I was like, oh, I was like, oh, yeah. He used to acknowledge me first and say hello before I like fight for him. Oh, shit. She's spelling, she's not over it.
Starting point is 00:51:25 Oh, it's Gabby's birthday today. Oh, happy birthday Gabby. And we got you some vegan cupcakes. Yeah, we only got you one because nobody else wants that shit. Well, there's two in there. I get two for her. My, my, my, you want one? Like, there was four vegan cupcakes. I don't know what they're. Let's look at them. Let me see them. I know I'm in them. I actually be better because the vegan,
Starting point is 00:51:49 it's like still a lot of sugar. Yeah, vegan. It's vegan doesn't necessarily mean healthy. No, it means a lot of sugar. It means a lot of sugar. A lot of sugar. Yeah. So can we talk about, I watch,
Starting point is 00:52:02 I finally watch this Michael Jackson thing. Oh, Jesus. Come on man, I feel it. I watch their father watches Michael Jackson thing. Oh Jesus That's that talk about Woody Allen. Why can we get an update on Harvey Weinstein? Asia Argento David Listen Mike fuck kids No, Mike fucked Say it. You can't say it. You can't say it. You can't say it.
Starting point is 00:52:25 Vaughn, get off your phone. You can't prove that my whole kids. Oh, now I get to be a part of a conversation. No, what I did like is that he was dead. You can't get a guy when he's dead. They apparently they did. You can't do that. And Oprah was bullshit too.
Starting point is 00:52:38 Did you watch it? Yes, I watched. He's the boy. You honestly don't believe in your heart or heart. You don't believe he did that. First of all, the kid like, Danny bent me over and spread my cheeks. No, he did. I'm putt. What? Yeah. I didn't, by the way, I, I, I, I mean, who remembers that like that? That's been a beauty. That's a pretty fucking vivid memory. Can he spread my cheeks and lick my ass? He didn't say that. Yeah. No, he said, he said, he said, he, said, they both said this.
Starting point is 00:53:05 They both said he used to have me go across the room, bend over, open my ass cheeks to my anus and he would jerk off to me opening up my ass. Okay, and then one time he went over and licked it. Right, and I would say, look at this, look at this like this. And he used to, he used to make them blow him, never ejaculate it in their mouth or anything.
Starting point is 00:53:28 He would always jerk off through their butts, right? And he would blow, he would, one of the kids woke up to Michael blowing him, giving oral sex to the kid, he was seven. If Mike didn't fuck, McCulloch, I'll call him a head and fuck down. But they're saying he did. That delicious little boy, they can't say that.
Starting point is 00:53:45 Delicious. They were saying, they're going, He was the most delicious boy at that time. Mike did fucking hang out with hot kids. He didn't hang out with no dumpers. Now these kids did not get any money for the documentary, correct? Nope. They've been got money.
Starting point is 00:54:00 No, they didn't get no money. Yes, they did. None. They got money. They didn't. Yeah, the, they didn't get no money. Yes, they did. None. They got money. They didn't. Yeah, the gate one kid got 25 million. No, they didn't. That was the other kid that actually sued Michael.
Starting point is 00:54:10 These two guys, you didn't see the documentary, did you? No. Exactly. This carcass I was giving the opinions on shitty. You just want to take down Mike. You want to take down a kid apart. I jump out. Can I say something?
Starting point is 00:54:22 I was, I, I was. Elvis was a hero too most but he never mentioned to me Yeah, and Michael racist suck kids dicks and put it fingers in their Fuck my job way. Yeah, and fuck Michael Take it back on Kelly because those bitches fucking rape chicks and rape kids Because those bitches fucking rape chicks and rape kids. So I was like, I have to race and stole fucking songs. No. And Elvis married a child.
Starting point is 00:54:51 Yeah, what it was legal. Marry at least he married him. Mike just threw these little dudes away. I hope that was a new little dude. Look, at the end of the day, Michael Jackson admitted that it was cool and okay, it's like Chris Rock's joke. It was okay to take naps with little boys when you're 40 some years old. Come on.
Starting point is 00:55:08 The guy said like this, this is when I knew it was real. This is when I knew Mike Farkids. The guy, one of the kids he had gotten older. He had the kid for 40 years old now. That's a kid. No, back then, the kid had gotten older, right? He wasn't seven anymore. He had gotten older. And he showed up at the house and Mike was
Starting point is 00:55:27 with the new kid, the one that wound up soon and we're getting the money. He was with him and and this kid was hot. The little tiny what? See, you're saying he's hot now. What's happening? What the fuck do you mean he's hot? Yeah. Good looking kid. He's saying. He's saying. He's a good looking kids. He says, good looking guys. Yeah. Well, I'm a fucking pervert. I'm sorry. Oh, sorry. Can't fucking jug around.
Starting point is 00:55:50 The kid was good looking kid. Yeah, good looking kids. It was a dime piece. What do you want to say? What the fuck? I mean, my thoughts are you sexualized a kid. Here's the old guy. Here's the old guy.
Starting point is 00:56:00 The kid, the kid, Mike, they're all at the house and Mike took the new kid upstairs. And he was like, I had to go downstairs and sleep on the couch. And he took the new kid where I used to go. And I just remember crying on the couch because I just wanted to be with Mike upstairs doing what we do. But he was doing that with him. And he goes, I just remember feeling rejected. This is a kid. Feeling rejected. He was like, what is he felt like?
Starting point is 00:56:30 I'm talking about the kid, not Michael dumb dumb. Focus. You're talking about the kid passed. He wasn't. The kid was like, he was 11 at the time. He was 11 at the time. Hold is he now? What is on that documentary now? Hold. Hold. I don this kid. He was 11. No, he was 11 at the time. Ape hold is he now when he's on that documentary. How old is he now? Hold. Hold. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:56:48 There's like another like exactly how old are you? Come clean. Look exactly. I don't believe him. I'm telling you, man. You you keep it. If my guy was white, what do you have done? No, absolutely. I'm gonna take something. White, Mike, man, I've gonna take something. White Mike, man, did it. Black Mike, nothing. So keep this thing. You don't think you don't think Mike was white? I want to know that. White Mike was white. White Mike, it's a old black Mike and a dangerous
Starting point is 00:57:18 album. That's white Mike. Yeah. From from the wall. I can do it from throwing to off the wall all down as black mic after wall Mike you know the lesson them was white Mike. Yes My problem Wait a minute wait a minute. That's Look at it. Why might you say white Mike did it black Mike did it so black music black Mike black Mike did it didn't do shit. Thriller didn't do it. Throw it.
Starting point is 00:57:53 Nothing. Live your life off the wall. She's with an old ray. Old ray. Wait, so man on the mirror man on the mirror did it? Man and mirror probably touched them. Really? Because white Mike. It was in a mirror like,
Starting point is 00:58:05 you gotta make a change. He was trying to stop him so much. Oh, shit. This always is a white. He was trying to stop fucking kids. Why gotta make a change when you look at the kids? He was starting to make a man. And I look at that bum and I said bend over.
Starting point is 00:58:21 But not anymore. Ow. What the end of that Let me tell you something Mike I'm not getting up. I'm that black mark while I'll never give a black mark white Mike fuck. I'm not what about our Kelly hard telling. Yeah, what what about that? Look if you put on a remix to a mission right, it will be very hard for me to not start dancing. You don't even know. You don't know what an
Starting point is 00:58:48 ignition. You never know the art Kelly songs. Oh, he really knows my belief I can fly. I was like, Gabby, can you get on the fucking, might just went pissed his diabetes kicked in, right? The only time we needed him this
Starting point is 00:59:00 fucking joke to bring up in our Kelly song and he's fucking. He's having no art Kelly song. don't know I know I know the name love and step in the name of them all put it on the song I am a hero now Now put a separate name on. Separate name. Yeah, separate name.
Starting point is 00:59:25 That is a wedding song. Flag. This is a wedding song. Oh. Oh. This is up there with the electric slide. Ah. Come on.
Starting point is 00:59:37 Who can't dance to that shit? This is when he was pissing on people or not. Who can't dance to that? Oh. Oh. We got flesh lights in the house, baby. What is that? I think not on people or not. Who cares, dance, then? Y'all. Ah. We got flesh lights in the house, baby. What is that? You fuck it. It's a parker music.
Starting point is 00:59:51 You fuck it, all right? No, this isn't his fuck music. This is his, we're in a good relationship. Now, if you want to hear fuck our Kelly music, you gotta hear, um, what's the one? My mind's telling me no. My body. My body. My body's telling me, yeah. Music you gotta hear um that's what's good shit my mind tell me no My body's tell me yeah
Starting point is 01:00:16 I'm sorry. I get too excited about our Kelly. It's actually. You know why it's not cuz it was kind of good So let me ask you question our Kelly all the shitties accused of doing rapin Fucking kids another kid fucker black got people take over kid fucking that was like a white guy There's a child I said I was my lesson as a child so I have to understand that thing What you happen? Yes? My family member, but here's the here's the thing here's the thing when it comes like how close cousin or somebody close the I want to get Let's go let's go Let's do it How close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close how close Step of the lame love here to come out better you place what I learned Place the bitch you can best more. I watch the arch heli document like a
Starting point is 01:01:09 Reality here's what I learned I'm not going there Cuz I'm one of the people who feel like you should be able to separate the art from the artist When I watch the arch heli documentary I Learned about the ecosystem of supporting this music and how. Come on. Come on. I fucked up by saying that.
Starting point is 01:01:31 What was it? How close? I got. Wasn't you a brother? I wasn't you all too much. Wasn't you a cousin? I tried to help you. You're not gonna.
Starting point is 01:01:41 Wasn't you a step down? Did he walk in the room a little bit all the night and touch you on the dinner y'all the bum bum. I can't listen to Mike's music now. I don't know. I don't know. You can't listen to Mike's music now.
Starting point is 01:01:55 What are you fucking talking about? You can't. You have to be able to separate the art from the artist is what I'm trying to say. If a guy wants. Contributing. What? Contributing to the music.
Starting point is 01:02:04 If y'all think I'm going to be a musician.uting to the office. I'm going to give up. Fucking off the wall. For some little shitty kid. I'm just going to talk about the law. Fucking play off the wall. I'm listening. I'm listening to this music.
Starting point is 01:02:17 I'm not thinking about. You're going to play on the second car by a school? Yes. You're thinking about what the song does to you. I get it. Right. But I'm not thinking about, but no one left the studio after that. No.
Starting point is 01:02:32 And took kids on a fucking roller coaster. That's white mine. White mine did it. Yeah, this is all white. We already established. This is all the wall, baby. But where's the fucking off the wall? He picked the wall with a napkin.
Starting point is 01:02:41 Look at that. That is black mic. Oh yeah. Turn that shit out. Turn that shit out. Fuck. Can we play this? This is fucking off the wall! He picked the wall with the... Look at that! That is black Mike! Oh yeah, turn that shit out! Turn that shit out! Can we play this? This is the song they told me I can move to New York and make it when I was a kid. So this was Mike fucking chicks! That's black Mike!
Starting point is 01:02:55 Yes! Let's go turn it up! Turn it up! Let's hear it! This is when you was gonna die in a russ! Huh! Turn it up! Turn that shit out! When the ride is on your shoulder... Oh shit! Diana Ross On your knees And oh I'll take you in my room and reach you
Starting point is 01:03:35 That's white my looky-my Right What have stop if you live it off the wall Shit Fuckin me my Listen it is a weird thing can I say something that Mike is a coolest motherfucker? I mean he's a bad motherfucker and something happened to him where he became white white my team. You can't play my
Starting point is 01:04:07 Michael Jackson. Why might he was going white? He was going in black. What is the update on why I'm not talking about everyone. Who's talking about this? She's trying to bring up a rapist shut up. We'll talk about rape. We'll talk about this rape tonight. So I'm not just to find any rape of any or especially when it comes to kids. But let's keep the same energy. Bill Cosby's and
Starting point is 01:04:30 Jill or Kelly's going down. Michael Jackson's going down. And what is the update on Harvey Weinstein? Jill. I'm not what I want. What do you have? Well, y'all got to listen. I'm a listen. Y'all got a list. What do you say?
Starting point is 01:04:45 You can't go to that. Are you all giving a, and that's not listen. Listen. Listen, we're not talking about, we're not, we're not, we're not talking about,
Starting point is 01:04:54 we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about,
Starting point is 01:05:01 we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're not talking about, we're that out. Cut that out. No, you want to talk about everyone? Why is he what do you want to talk about? I just can I at least have an update. He just changed his legal team. Oh, okay. So what are you? What are you? What are you? Vaughn? What are you saying? I said it. I'm not could donate rape of any any kind especially when it comes to children.
Starting point is 01:05:20 He just mits down. But as a black woman, I talk to my hands. I'm looking at your hands and sympathizing me. I know I have man hands. That's where I have really long hair. I like your fucking fingers, the beautiful. Nails. Because I feel like I look like a man. I like your hands.
Starting point is 01:05:34 Okay. I mean, I like man hands. I will be distracted with a compliment. I'm lonely. So if you can. You're gonna get fucking man hands. I like your fingers. All I've seen is. Yeah, your fingers. Bobby're fucking man. I like your fingers. I like your fingers.
Starting point is 01:05:46 Yeah, your fingers. Bobby's gay. You know, your fingers. Bobby's gay. Bobby's gay. Bobby's gay. Bobby's gay. I can pull the basket off.
Starting point is 01:05:57 Yeah, Bobby's gay. Look at those fingers. I got an add-ons app for too. Come on. Come on. You think I'm giving up this song? That's it. I'm good. I gotta add on that Over there I I'm getting up ready. I'll give up the toilet. I'll give up Rebe. I'll give up Tito.
Starting point is 01:06:28 Man, your name. Nice, Mike. Comic. Gotta leave that 95. Oh, shit. God damn it, my boy. Oh, my God. All right.
Starting point is 01:06:40 Let the man lift it. Holy shit. You want to see my hands again.. And more questions you got, baby. Whatever questions. Sounds like the mother from good times. Holy shit. Hell, hell, hell, hell. So you think they go harder at the black?
Starting point is 01:06:54 You think that? Well, who went down for, who went to jail for the white guys? What went to jail for the me too? No, exactly. No, my mom. Can't even identify it. You just made my point, Paul. Kevin Spacey. No, not that I'm crazy. None of us. He didn't even identify it. You just made my point Paul Kevin Spacey.
Starting point is 01:07:05 No, not the Spacey. None of us. He didn't really get arrested. It was no charges. Yeah, it was not that. No charges. It was like 18. Why was it only real?
Starting point is 01:07:15 He was 18. He was 14 when he made his initial mind. He was 15. He was going to go to jail. Stop one second. No. We'll talk it over each other. He, he originally this video.
Starting point is 01:07:24 Hold on. Listen, the video is when he was 14. Kevin Spacey, no. You don't even know. You never watch the Michael Jackson video. You're commenting. He was at a bar with a guy who was 18. And the guy said, oh, I couldn't help it. The guy's full of shit.
Starting point is 01:07:37 The guy from rent, when he did it, he was 14. No, yeah. You're wrong. When you put his hand down his pants, they said he was 14. So was that kid that Used her power over as a producer and director is the HR. Exactly everything just blows in the fucking wind She's white and she's a woman Me too, it's so funny ball. I'm so white. I didn't even think about any of the shit. I didn't think about which is
Starting point is 01:08:03 But here's the thing a lot of people get off. No, but here's the thing now. We have all the information about Bill Cosby, R. Kelly, Michaels, we know everything. Right, but the Bill Cosby thing, the Bill Cosby thing dragged out. He dragged that thing out for a long time. And a long, we knew everything, right?
Starting point is 01:08:18 It was in front page news. All I did was ask one question, what's the update on Harvey Weinstein and nobody had an answer? We do it first of all. He doesn't count up at the computer. Stop acting like you're a talk show host. We fucking answered you.
Starting point is 01:08:32 I'm not. I'm gonna go, he's just throwing the computer. That's what I'm saying. He's like, what the hell are you doing? She's acting like she's listening or she's teaching us some shut up vod. Yeah. Coachvod.com. Whatever. I'm listening. Please listen. Listen. First of all, you're out of your mind. Like she's we're listening or she's teaching us some shut up on yeah, post-von calm
Starting point is 01:08:47 Whatever, how listen? Listen listen first of all you're out of your mind. Carrey wise. He's got lost Everything in his going to jail They thought Paul Manifred was going to jail. We thought oh Jay was going to jail too never happened We thought OJ was going to jail too never happened. Yeah, that's a good What an ad-zail for That's a bad ass. He still is a shit. Thank you Mexican. You fucking are you on my fucking team? I'm a good Mexican. He's with me. He doesn't know Shit Other shit. Oh, yeah, I'm glad we made up before this
Starting point is 01:09:25 This fucking duo was gonna come in Just happened I'm afraid to say I'm afraid to say shit too It's a fucking BET sitcom That's just racist. Michael Jackson ever went to jail. I like my least. I didn't jail yet. Michael Jackson didn't go to jail.
Starting point is 01:09:49 Yeah, never went to jail. Because he was a quit of all charges. Yeah, but not these. Yeah, he was. The same guy came back when he's dead. Okay, first of all, first of all, oh fucker. Oh, first of all, you have to throw the world out.
Starting point is 01:10:02 It meant that it was white Mike. Just admit it. I admit white Mike. It was sound.. It meant that it was white Mike, just admit it. I admit white Mike. It does sound like it was white Mike. It did like when you go with the timeline, I have to be. It's a legitimate fucking, it's a legitimate fucking case. You are a genius. So black Mike, that's your shit.
Starting point is 01:10:18 Thank you for pointing out. Do you want to understand how much more racist, Vaughn and Keith are than we are? Yes. You want to understand that, right? This is straight racism right? That's terrible. Yeah, that's terrible. Yeah, that's terrible.
Starting point is 01:10:29 Yeah, that's terrible. If we had what's your point? I just wanted to... Welcome to 2019, Verzy. What's your point, white man? I'm not white, I'm with them. Fucking black Mike is the shit. White Mike's a rapist.
Starting point is 01:10:44 Black Bobby. Black Howard, I'm with them fucking black Mike is the shit white mics are rapist black Bobby I'm black Bobby Play that fucking music motherfucker black Bobby's in the house I'm not gonna sing this Oh You cool if you look that swaggy with a bow tie He has on a bow tie? Yeah. He has on a bow tie. When did he start getting lighter skinned? Yeah, when did Mike turn into white Mike?
Starting point is 01:11:30 White Mike turned into white Mike, cause he had a... No, was that early 90s? Was that early 90s? Yeah, Vitted Lightgo. The Vitties, I thought. No, no, no. There's white Mike 1970. No, wasn't.
Starting point is 01:11:41 No, that's really nice. No, that's really nice. That's really nice. Trillus Black Mike? Yeah, he's still black. Yeah, but he's not. It's still her. Trillus Black Mike? Yeah, but he's not, he's not, he's starting to, he's starting to get lighter. What about bad, bad, was bad. Bad, bad, bad.
Starting point is 01:11:53 Bad, bad, what album? Bad, maybe. What album is man on a mirror? That's right, Mike. That's right, Mike. What do we stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, bring that up. That's what, so that's Black Mike and that's white Mike. This is white Mike.
Starting point is 01:12:04 That's what he's started touching kids. The white Mike white My guys when he starts touching kids The memory of the kids The kids That's him is That's making sense God damn it White man and no Listen to me if anybody in this room has asked me with this podcast his name
Starting point is 01:12:21 I'm throwing a fucking dildo at your head. What should we name it? Man in a mirror black ask me what this podcast's name, I'm throwing a fucking dildo at your head. What should we name it? Man in a mirror. Black. No, black. Mike. Maybe no, white. No, black. Mike. I don't want white. Mike. I'm a fucking black. Wow. You can see like, look at his eyes. You can tell me. Look, what a good looking young black kid he was. What an ugly old white woman he became. Yeah, that's when everything went wrong. What the fuck? White Mike
Starting point is 01:12:50 Good looking good looking good. Okay, I found it because I didn't have any support on this podcast the Did you ask for any thousands of what were you asking for my voice wasn't hurt because I'm a woman you were singing I heard what were you to what you ask Man and a Mirror was on the bad album. We were trying to figure out when he became White Mike and I said, well, it must have been during the bad, the man and a mirror time. So that was the album bad. Well, wait, I said that. We said that.
Starting point is 01:13:16 But nobody confirmed it. I want to draw a home. I call for him. He's black. You don't support me. I didn't do anything. White Mike did everything. What about our Kelly? Yeah, because that It's black. You don't support me. Didn't do anything. White, Mike, did everything. What about our Kelly?
Starting point is 01:13:27 Yeah, cuz that's all black. What about that's black? You can't get, there's no white in our Kelly. There's no white in our Kelly. Alright, so when did Elvis get his little girlfriend? That was fucking. Jerry Lulos. What did he get his little girlfriend? She was 13. Jerry Lulos.
Starting point is 01:13:50 He? Hi. Where did Wap Mabba do that? Keep that. Keep that dude up. Oh shit. He does that good, doesn't he? That's what it was that.
Starting point is 01:13:58 Wap Mabba. That's 2D3 there. A little rich. That's what it was. A little rich. It was his wife, Richard. He was a little rich. He was a little rich. He was why was that? What was that? What, mama, mama? That's 2D-3 there, a little rich.
Starting point is 01:14:07 That little rich was his wife, Richard. He became a white Richard. Don't you try to incriminate him? No, don't you know it? No, Jerry Lee Lewis had a 13-year-old too. Yeah. But here's the thing. That was, that was like 14-year-old.
Starting point is 01:14:22 Well, go ahead, say something. But if Elvis stated a fairie, if Elvis stated a 15-year-old, and then married her, and stayed with her for a long time like, that's a thousand. We're gonna say something. But if all this stated a barrier, if all this stated a 15 year old and then married her and stay with her for a long time, is that different? No. You don't just marry. Mike says,
Starting point is 01:14:31 I'm just asking Mike, say that. What was also his cousin, Jerry Lee Lewis married his cousin? Okay. That's why, is that why you don't like? And if you got married at 14, you were probably,
Starting point is 01:14:40 that's all the way, why? That's why you're right. Well, 13, then you get married at 14. You don't just get married on the 14th birthday. Listen, so they were doing something earlier than that. Well, I'm like, fucking night. Will you fucking listen?
Starting point is 01:14:51 I'm sorry, Bob. It was cross conversation. You're trying to make your point coach Vaughn. Jesus Christ. She's a goat. Thank you. She's showing the fingers. I'm trying to hit with her.
Starting point is 01:15:01 Literally. Seven of her own side podcasts with Verzy. He's not listening either. No, you know what she say. Say it. Say it. Look at my finger. I hate all of you.
Starting point is 01:15:13 Oh God. This is your fault. I'm not even supposed to be here. You come up when you want, but I didn't know that. Listen. Yeah, Jerry Lindler was with his cousin. Your fault I'm not even supposed to be here. You come up when you want Yeah, Jerry Lee was with his cousin Why won't you acknowledge?
Starting point is 01:15:40 Kelly what did Jerry Lee? George Washington and slaves. Listen, what about... And you know we fuck the slaves. Both of you. What? What about Arkelli? What about Arkelli?
Starting point is 01:15:57 Do you acknowledge that this guy is a piece of shit? Yes. I acknowledge that you have to separate the art from the artist. What does that mean? That means I can listen to a art You think he did the shit that they're accusing you Support you. They do you think of children coach Vaughn? Right. Do you think he should go to jail for what he did?
Starting point is 01:16:19 Absolutely, you cannot have sex with a 14 year old kid. That is wrong Absolutely, if you did that take your criminal as the jail. However, if I bought our Kelly music years ago, and I enjoy the song, that does not mean I support child rape. I know. I know. I know. I know.
Starting point is 01:16:39 Now, let me, let me be fair. Like it's a piece of, to be fair. You know, you got to know what peace fries. What did you just say? You do you know who got the nipple prize? This guy who gets who won the nipple prize? Let me tell you this and explain this. Yeah, we run the noble. Now we start going after people. Let's go after Gandhi. Well, for what? Well, Gandhi was a little perv little per I don't get fuck about that in the end dude Go after him take him out. I won't fucking take him out take a Z's and
Starting point is 01:17:33 You're Russell Peters take him all To be safe what you're trying to keep the white man safe? What the fuck your wife I agree with you you live a wider neighborhood than me. I got more fucking hymns in my max's school than you Hands I just said I agree with you. I'm joking listen Listen, man. Anybody who's a piece of shit, that's the jail regardless. 100%
Starting point is 01:18:07 Paul, Paul, look at me. Look at me, this is bogey. There we go. Yeah. What are you guys saying? Dandy slept with his grand nieces. Yeah, but that was culturally acceptable back then. No, how do you know?
Starting point is 01:18:19 You just made that up. I just sound like you. It sounded really good. You sound like I convinced it. Yeah. That's about. I convinced it. Yeah. That's about the fucking Catholic priest. What happened to them?
Starting point is 01:18:28 What? What? Yeah, but you know why they did it? They found out most of them were listening to Michael Jackson songs. No, they were listening to Mike in the mirror. Why Mike? The bad album. And beyond.
Starting point is 01:18:40 The bad. That's why he named it bad. He knew he was bad. He was starting with the man in the mirror. He was trying and then is down here. Damn right. Michael Jackson had to have been a lester. Right? No. That is a was. Of course he was. You think so, by which was? Of course. You know what you mean? Which man? The bass player was sucking his dick.
Starting point is 01:19:00 No, they say we on a road, man. Might as well, you know. yeah, well, you mean, no, what do you mean on a road? They were never there were never I bet you want I bet you I bet you some Jackson five Jackson five was on a roll they say when molestation is mostly in the family somebody in the family you would know what huh, oh, you say that as a son I didn't get molestabating me my family huh did you get touched before? I'm pleased I'm doing what Vaughn did. If Vaughn says it, I'll talk about it. What, I was fixed that day.
Starting point is 01:19:30 And with the night we had the, remember the night I just said, I was, can we not fucking do that? Can we just fucking do that? I'm sorry, what happened to you? No, I'm just saying like that. No, the last thing I wanna do is fucking wrap this up with you two stories of this fucking.
Starting point is 01:19:40 Versus you just fucking open up a little bit. I guess, I think you have to like you a little bit of it. Did you get touched by this? No, I didn't get touched. I did not get touched. Versus, look at up a little bit I I swear to god did you get Look at me I have friends that did Keith Nobody touched that hairy little 10 year old
Starting point is 01:20:04 A little hairy ass This fucking Greek guy had hair in his ass at 7. I bet he'd show him a tribalism. He's like, ah, you got a hairy little ass? You're a fucking man ass. I think I'm trying to fucking kidnap a 40 year old man ass. You look like fucking stuff a lot more. I had a man ass and fucking 12 years old. He had a little man dick, a little big, a big, a big thump of vein in it.
Starting point is 01:20:25 With a fucking rough helmet. Oh shit. We got proper. Gotham all week and I'll be there Friday and Saturday. What are you gonna be? Oh fuck. I'm in Connecticut on Thursday, but I, I forget the name of the place is Dan Berry, Connecticut.
Starting point is 01:20:43 CoachVon.com. I just started a new Patreon if people could support that that will be great. Yeah, go support I'm gonna be done a monthly show here in New York and it's a tier to get free classes and stuff so my podcast starts at night Through girls one big boy Keith Your that's not the name is just a shum. It's Amy shum was podcast with it's my podcast. Amy. She was podcast with three girls one key. Two girls and a key in a a Keith.
Starting point is 01:21:09 No. One key. When are they going to realize your piece of shit tonight? Oh, you know what I'm a carry on it on a 28. That's all. Yeah, I got shot.
Starting point is 01:21:20 That's the service. We're in. God damn it. We get it. I tried just one thing. I'm not good at this. Listen, you go. No, go. You do it. we get it. I tried just one thing. I'm not good at this. Listen, you go. Go, you do it.
Starting point is 01:21:28 Do it again. I like God's want to do it again. Coach Von dot. I'm sorry. I was saying I want to say to you. I was like, yeah, I'm going to be free comedy. Yeah, who's that guy? I'm an exclusive content.
Starting point is 01:21:40 What's that thing, Jake, right? I'm on coach Von dot. Who's that thing, Jake? Please support my coach one that come who's that thing check? Please support my new page. I listen. Yeah, seriously, please. Are you doing the page on school? We talked yeah, we talked about it. I wanted to tell you Having your fucking side conversations he supports me and I appreciate it. It's the same thing. I go with David Zucker Is that white bond that's white? Is that white bond? That's white bond. You discovered me.
Starting point is 01:22:07 That's Dan Berry, Connecticut bond. Hi guys. Hey, everybody. Oh, they love me in Long Island. It governors and brokers. I'll be at that. Sorry. What do you get for?
Starting point is 01:22:19 March 22nd, 23rd. Bananas has brokites. April 4th through 7th. Tempia, Arizona. Improv. Just did that, what a club. Yeah, and then the week after that, I'll be at the punchline in Philadelphia. You could see that all at PaulVersi.com.
Starting point is 01:22:31 Yeah, you got Robert Kelly, what patreon.com says Robert Kelly. All the new members from this week, I had a bunch of people join up. Thank you very much, you know what's up there. Podcast first, audio version, video version first, and also one on ones. And live from the shed, we are switching gaps.
Starting point is 01:22:49 Come over on this mic, tell everybody what's happening. We're switching. Ah, from the shed is gonna be at the pussycat for the next two months. Yeah. It's gonna be great. We're filming it tomorrow, live, start to 11 o'clock. If you wanna combine, we got.
Starting point is 01:23:03 Email us at Wackey.com. We got a new sir. Who's the girl we got? Um, sinde lies a call base. Bring up a call. Come on. Sydney Jacob. Like, like, please, you're fucking freezing Mike's fingers. Please you should support her because she's a beautiful. She's she's the best. Let me see her. I'll bring up the video video video video video. What do you say? Don't bring up the face.
Starting point is 01:23:28 But bring up the video. We're bringing up a who is she a comic? Liza Kobe. Let me see the cell. See what says Liza Kobe. Did you mean? Did you mean? Right here.
Starting point is 01:23:37 Michael. Michael, go back. Stop being worse. Go back. Go back. Hey, black. Did you mean? There you go, Mike. Go back. Hey black. Why did you mean? There you go, Mike.
Starting point is 01:23:47 Now bring up the second video. Oh, this motherfucker. Is that Mexican Mike? Go back Mike. Go back Mike. Go back Mike. Go back. Oh, hmm.
Starting point is 01:23:55 Leave us. The second video. Click on the video, not the fucking link. Leave me alone. He's the worst. We usually have Mike 2.0 sitting there, but Mike canceled tonight. So we have, oh Mike, mush Mike in there.
Starting point is 01:24:07 This is her right here. Unbelieveable, she's one of the fucking baddest motherfuckers around. What is she? Don't want. She rocking roll. Do you look at her? Oh, sure.
Starting point is 01:24:16 Does she do Michael Jackson covers? And we're gonna take you on a journey. Yeah, fast forward. We're gonna have a journey, baby. We take him on a journey. Bye, bye, bye. I go to another video That's what I rock in one. That's a white girl. That's white. Colby. No
Starting point is 01:24:32 Hands go just click back. Oh Motherfucker Gabby Motherfucker Gabby brought up the same video. I want to kill myself right now What do you need to help you just kind of calls my name out into the distance? Right here. Bring up the same video. I want to kill myself right now when he needs help He just kind of calls my name out into the distance right yeah bring up the rocker right there right there bring up that one All right, let's see This is her man do I fucking love this girl That's right there we go Yeah lies a cold day
Starting point is 01:25:00 This is probably sound look at her No, that's a good place. Yeah, look at her. That's who it lies. No, that's, she's black. She's white. Hey, that's white. White. Hey, I'm not a white boy. Hey, what? I am, girl. Can't be a white boy. I'm a child. I
Starting point is 01:25:33 Does she date like that the audio's Stop what are you fucking? What are you an audio file? I'm saying like what are you working best? Bye? Audio is fucking I'm sorry, serious satellite radio. I didn't know it was like, I'm just showing a little clip who's on the show tomorrow. Oh, no, she sounds great. Sounds like me singing earlier. You're with you, audio.
Starting point is 01:25:53 Bye. Okay. Anyway, she's on the show tomorrow. 11 o'clock we start. If you're around the city fat black pussy cat, you want to stop by. Email us at ykwd producer at riotcast.com. And then at 1.30 we are filming another episode of a lot from the pussy cat you want to stop by email us at ykwd producer at riotcast.com and then at one thirty we are filming another episode of the live from the pussy cat. Let me see the butt.
Starting point is 01:26:10 I want to see the butt. At the mic can't refuse. I'm a solosist. I want to see the butt. He really is. We say I'll tell you. It's perfect. Tell you, Mike. What does that have to do with her voice? Happy when it hits her. Don't blame the sweet. Thank you. Don't make it your thing. You're so good. Is she gonna sing on your show?
Starting point is 01:26:39 I think it did when some times. They just think you're not big-suffer. I wish you would. She's so, I saw her live, dude. She's fucking incredible. I mean, everything. She sings, yeah, they sing everything. But she's a fucking... I can only tell if she sings a blind song.
Starting point is 01:26:57 I can only tell. I, um, anyways. At 1-30 we have Brian Coppillmann, the writer. Oh. Creator, Brian Coppillmann. Oh, Oh creator Brian Coppillmann. Oh, Brian Coppillmann. What? What was he to? I'm gonna I'm getting to it. Kiki you're being disruptive. Thank you. Von coach Von What Hey Brian Coppillmann's on a 130 the creator of billions
Starting point is 01:27:23 Well, he's not Zucker. Yeah, exactly. That's not Zucker. I take him over fuck. Let's have Zucker on and you come on. We'll just talk about it. That's what I'm talking about. I just want to be invited. Yeah, fucking show business horse.
Starting point is 01:27:35 I'm just, I'm lonely. I just need friends. Well, you got friends. You're right here. Stop reaching out when we're here. Okay, I'm sorry. The fuck he dropped her. I'm so sorry. The fuck he dropped to her. I'm so sorry.
Starting point is 01:27:45 The little having a great time and she's still lonely. The fuck. Yeah, it's a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a Do it tonight. Yeah, look man, I, that's so fucked up that you brought up White Mike. I've never, I don't know why that fuck makes sense. It does. It's so genius. I mean, look at that.
Starting point is 01:28:17 That album and beyond White Mike did it. Yeah. We have a song from a fan. They sent us. Oh yeah, here we go. This is what we should end with that. So we'll end with that. We're gonna close the show with that a fan. They sent us. Oh, yeah. Here we go. We should end with that. So we'll end with that.
Starting point is 01:28:26 We're gonna close the show with that. Okay. Close the show. Patreon.com.com.com. That's Robert Kelly. Yeah. I'm gonna be going off from this weekend. Next week, we can be at last.
Starting point is 01:28:35 How Calgary Calgary? I mean, I'm gonna Calgary next weekend. I'm gonna rule. I'm sorry. That's Thursday. Fucking it. 4 through April 6. God, just freak me out.
Starting point is 01:28:44 I thought I'd double book myself. Yeah, I'm gonna Calgary. You've been there? Yeah. Is it nice? It was the routiest of the Canadian places I went. What do you mean? They just, it was in a venue.
Starting point is 01:28:55 It was, it was a little routy. What venue was it? It was like just small theater I did. And it was crazy? No, it's just like, you know, there, it's a, you know, it's a hockey, it's like basically upstate New York of Canada, a hockey fans, you know. Drinkers and shit.
Starting point is 01:29:09 You haven't been up there? Never, right? Fuck that shit. He's got to wear those two-way swirls in them. He's just getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's
Starting point is 01:29:22 getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really , he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really, he's getting really rap just so. I've done. We're gonna end the show early, because Keith's old. No. I'm gonna end the show a half hour early, because Keith's gonna go dry. We're gonna talk about, what's the name, ill hand? Who? Ill hand.
Starting point is 01:29:37 Oh, you being the senator. Congresswoman. Congresswoman. Okay, yeah, let's talk about her. You wanna do it? How fucking let's do it? You wanna break your shoulder? She wanna nipple, peace prize. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, they're accusing of everything, brother. Let's talk, let's talk about. They're accusing me.
Starting point is 01:30:05 They're accusing of saying some shit if you had said, well, if anybody, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if anybody, like a white guy had said that a Republican or conservative, why does has said everything? Stop saying if, hang on, I'm saying if they said that right now, today, fuck white guys.
Starting point is 01:30:21 What? What? Sorry. What? Fuck. Fuck white guys. What? What can you, sorry. Jesus. Ah. He goes, fuck white guy. What the job of his drink? Sorry, I forgot where I was.
Starting point is 01:30:33 He's, I forgot where I was from. I almost said something. He's literally in a room filled away. I almost said something about the Boston and the almost came out. Oh my god. Almost. Oh, geez.
Starting point is 01:30:43 Yikes. What the fuck? You mean the Boston and you almost came out? I know what it meant, almost. Oh, jeez. Yikes. What the fuck? You mean a boss and you almost came out? I know what it meant, but. You know, I think it's self-vlog. Maybe that's my white stuff. A varnish white, she's a white, you know. Go, Jumon.
Starting point is 01:30:56 She'll lose half of the fucking audience. She's white until the picture. Oh, mech, the shit out of my white mom. Varnish white. Varnish white until the picture, the network. Whoa, everyone. I white Varnish white To the pitch at the network To suck it right me fuck this Zucker listen motherfucker that's not motherfucker. No shit you interrupt motherfucker when you're talking and then I was like hey mom
Starting point is 01:31:21 Did you vote today? She went well. Did you vote today? You gotta make sure you're talking to it then again. Oh, shit. Well, she's accused of making anti-Semitic remarks. And she's basically, she said the Jews hypnotized the rest of the world. Right? Israel hypnotized. Israel. Well, I added the juice. I put that
Starting point is 01:31:46 yeah, it's not so medic. You don't say that we'll kick down the studio. I have. Oh my god. I mean, look, people believe that people say people say that you should be able to criticize Israel. There's a way to criticize anybody. but without being insulting anybody a balance in between It doesn't even mean you're racist, right? But why then why did the Democrats pass some bill about not you can't be anti-Semitic Why do they immediately do why didn't they just stand by her then? 100% no
Starting point is 01:32:22 Why? See this I've been listening to you for a while when it comes to politics and you always go I don't know politics but yet you still keep your affin you understand I don't way you don't know politics shut the fuck up tell me what I'm wrong tell me what I'm wrong answer my question answer my question I'm telling you now answer my question no About noble peace prize. Here's what the question you get you get it. So me all you want But answer the fucking question No, what's he was right? Then why did they fucking why did they come up with a whole new bill about you about being anti-Semitic? No, what they what they what they were Republicans is mad about that it wasn't like it was too broad
Starting point is 01:33:12 No, they were mad. They were mad. They were too broad. They were mad. They were too broad, but they also mad that they didn't name her by name Yeah, that's why they were mad. They should have named her by name. Now think of all the people that people just cast out, well, they name everybody by name. Donald Trump. But they don't. Donald Trump was an anti-sense, so many anti-antosimatic shit. He said everything. He said that this guy is the Mexican, the rapist.
Starting point is 01:33:39 I mean, he was right, but he said everything. So listen, come on. He was right, but he said I was listening. So listen, come on. I mean, we all agree on this wall thing. I mean, we're not public, but at this, at these mics, it went on. If you saw a nice fat wall down there, you'd be like, whew.
Starting point is 01:33:58 Why no? Listen, we like Mexican. You just don't want to live near. We just want to ease you in one at a time. We know that machine mic couldn't want to live now. Yeah, we just want to we just want to ease you in one of the time We know that most of you might could make it a wall It doesn't have to be a big wall half of them Make it six half feet didn't get over I've never seen a magazine with full-ass
Starting point is 01:34:20 Here's the thing though is how it's presented like I don't think anyone saying that our borders should just be wide open for anybody to come But what people are no people are saying that for the most are people are who say open borders? Fuck it. Nobody said no rules. We don't need it. Just come no, no, you said you say the wall. I'm not saying that I was you say to everything Okay, sorry saying to him. Okay, sorry. I'm saying to different things. Politics. I'm saying some people say that. I was saying to see you owe Joe listen, nice, sweet apology. That fuck him. He was wrong. You were wrong.
Starting point is 01:34:51 I seen a whole thing. What happened? What happened? Tell me what happened. I want to tell me what happened. I want to tell me what happened. I looked at the thing. You screaming at Mike. I didn't scream.
Starting point is 01:35:00 He screamed at me. You screamed at me. No, he didn't. Joe, a couple weeks ago, Joe was on. We brought up Trump. I had said what people, why Trump is gonna be reelected. Of course he's gonna be. And, and, but yeah, but he started, but Joe got fucking literally started,
Starting point is 01:35:14 like yelling at me and I had shut up. I had said, there you go screaming at me. I said, you're again screaming. I think you're screaming at me. I got taken, I was, please. I said to him, I go, dude, you yelling at me't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I can, I outta your mind. She's fucking hot as hell, I'll give you that. I'm gonna go for her. But I would never mess with her because she don't blink.
Starting point is 01:35:48 I don't fuck with a chicken, don't blink. Like she would actually fuck with you. Oh, stop it. I'm just rambling now. You're not even, you're saying shit. I'm just saying, I'm just talking about something. I'm just talking about it. Let's talk about it.
Starting point is 01:36:01 Let's do it. I think you'll get reelected for one simple reason. He sticks. He didn't win the first time. He just stole it then he'll steal it again. My problem, I'll shut up and tap out again. Fuck is yaps. I love it.
Starting point is 01:36:16 Fuck comes in after her thought. I love it. Everybody be told, I'll tell you why the fuck is here. She doesn't fucking buy herself. I don't know why. She's nobody listens his by herself I Somebody listen to me Yeah, join the club with Mike that's it on me here You're right. I'm gonna tell you one thing
Starting point is 01:36:35 I believe that whole thing is Let me tell you Don't break the word all Kelly is She knows she knows nothing look at me at you. She looks right and funny, Virzy. Cause he Virzy, listen to Zucker, come on. This clock's out here on the same money. I'm looking at the guy on the couch
Starting point is 01:36:55 that won't save the comic. No, you want to talk about Bob? You want to talk? You know what he is, Virzy? He's a trigger of on. You know Keith, all he does is trigger people. He doesn't, I'm telling you this. Oh, now he doesn't want me to kill him.
Starting point is 01:37:08 He wasn't believing. Left, right, said, he don't believe in shit. He's a lie-believe in wine, telling fucking pussy jokes, and getting his fucking ding-ding licked. That's all he blew in that. Fuck me. That's all he left ding-ding. He's being lick-ding.
Starting point is 01:37:22 That's all he likes, Verzy. I thought you spent the night with me in Tampa. I didn't know what you want. Oh my God. I cannot. The fuck's going on over here. I didn't hear the most sensitive. How was this?
Starting point is 01:37:33 No, I was crazy. Yeah, he. No, I'm being honest with this one. This one, I'm being honest with. I'm going to get Vaughn a mic in the other room. I apologize. We just turned it. We just turned it on everyone, so why don't she still talking? So what do you guys?
Starting point is 01:37:49 You finished? Gosh, everything is quiet. I can't. Vaughan a poppin. So, I'm gonna tell you this right now. Art Shelley. Coach Vaughan.com, now listen. Why can't I like his music?
Starting point is 01:38:02 I don't care if he, you got to separate the two. It's like, we're talking about Trump right now. Where's Harvey Weinstein? That's all I need to know. No, you got the problem. I can say, you got the problem. I don't like you. Let's deal with it.
Starting point is 01:38:17 I don't like it. I haven't liked you in 13 years. Yo. Where's the view on this goddamn podcast? I hate when you have a big you and little everybody else? No, we have a two you we have a two on that I want to big me to Get up that I want big key. I want a little me Give Keith the fuck is on camera. I want my own camera on this one because I want to tell Bob Kelly something
Starting point is 01:38:38 Right to now. I gotta hear this camera this one Where's the camera right? which is a camera right in that your camera all shit But radio is about to get real right on this way it gets real. Oh shit. This way the shit gets real make sure you acknowledge I've no Robert Kelly fall on fucking this one right there. Yeah, I know Robert Kelly for a long time Yeah, and I discovered Robert Kelly's nothing but a fucking bully. He's been bullying everybody. He's bullied who Joe D'Rosa fucking bully. He's been bullying everybody. He's bullied who Joe D'Rosa. He's bullied Steve Burns. He bully. I just seen Joe Liss on the last podcast. I didn't like that. Yeah. And I'm fed up with your shit. What? What? What? I say, you know, you're a stroke. You
Starting point is 01:39:19 lose your hearing. What I say? Fucking one arm. I'm talking's what whoa I'm bullying you right now bitch listen I'll fucking fight you from the left cock sucker listen I'll turn the lights out and he kick you right on your left side listen to me what I say to Joe list you screamed at Joe you know what I said he screamed at me first no it was screaming me first what are you four years? Are you here? Were you here? Who screamed at who first? Joe got loud first. No, no, no. Can you, Mike now said with him not you being your boss.
Starting point is 01:39:51 Mike, who's the Justin? He even, you too. I didn't like this. Who screamed, who screamed? Joe scream first. Who screamed the most? Ha ha ha. Say it.
Starting point is 01:40:02 Who's creamed the most Say it Bobby gets very loud Very loud, okay, but you're not the screaming me right now Who's out who's out who's a part mic just look at his phone hoping his ends Who got out of line first? Who's that line? Robert Kelly. Who's that line? I was watching who was that line Mike just let it the answer it don't Michael Badgering the witness. Don't Mike. Who was that line seriously? Who first who fucking brought it to that?
Starting point is 01:40:40 It felt like true. I made it loud. Thank you. What? I think you heard him. You just took You intimidated his man went for everybody. You did stare at the side of his head as he was trying to. I even said to Joe I go Joe you get you while you're screaming at him. I want you to You're screaming at guys to Joe list. I'm fucking cuz I know he's got the table going. Oh, blah fucking you No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no you know, you're talking about it. No, I'm talking about it. Right? Vaughn, am I right? Am I right? Cause I looked at the damn video on YouTube. You don't watch it. I was gonna use you.
Starting point is 01:41:10 First of all, you don't even have to get on your channel. You don't even have a computer. You have a compact. You didn't even want my laptop. I play it sound to black, my computer. Vaughn, Vaughn, talk to black. Play it sound to black, my computer. No, we have the other song we have to play first.
Starting point is 01:41:21 Yeah, now I'm fucking that. Play it sound to black, my computer. Vaughn, Vaughn, I have to play first. Now, I'm fucked up. Play us up to black, Mike. What, what, what, I want to get. I can't focus. Mike, turn that off. Don't listen. No, you fucking listen to him.
Starting point is 01:41:33 He's trying to fuck him. Manipulate you, Michael. Oh, he said you by you. He said your whole first name. Mexican Mike. Your new name is Mexican Mike. What do you say? What do you say? What did you say?
Starting point is 01:41:47 I was gonna say thank you for having me on your Shit my phone's back play Michael white We'll help you get that fun. Yeah. I'm glad you listened. Smart. Yeah. Hopefully. All right, listen.
Starting point is 01:42:07 Shut it off. Listen. I just want to shut up. Shut up, both of you. I got the boring. I got to move. I got to move. Gabby, what do you got?
Starting point is 01:42:20 I have a monthly show in Brooklyn called Jiggy with it at the way station and follow me on Instagram at gabby is Brian Key this is worse Key this is the biggest trouble maker on the fucking planet you know to see any cheat cause he heard my feelings in Brazil What you know Say what you got back say let's do it baby. I'm gonna do that. Why not? Cause we're gonna take it off. We're gonna start. Those stories, they're going back way back.
Starting point is 01:42:48 What do you got back? Hey, I'm a comedy photographer on Instagram at Human Places, the EZ-3. Chrissy, what do you got, buddy? Not that cheating and then at a Becky's house me and this kid Lawrence Deloche have a men's fashion podcast about sneakers and stuff. You checked that out.
Starting point is 01:43:03 Awesome. Mikey, what do you got? Man, Mikey killed it this week. Came down on Uncle Vinnie's, did a spot and fucking murdered. What you got, man? Follow me at Mike Peace War as I'll be opening for Christus DeFino at the last time. Why?
Starting point is 01:43:18 I'm going to say Antonio. No, I'm kidding. That 28 to 31st. Yeah, that's about me from San Antonio. Yeah, that's about it. You're from San Antonio. Yeah, that's my home club. I hope you're for Christa Stefano and Montiol. God. Oh my God. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Hey, you want to come?
Starting point is 01:43:37 Why? I know. I know. I'm sorry. What the fuck man? I'm sorry. What the fuck man? I messed up. I love you Keith Paul Robert Mexican Mike Gabby photographer She has a name mother fucker sheet look at she's on a phone thanking people I was I was promoting the Instagram my What is it? It's finger, huh? What the fuck is Rui? I'm gonna Jill Scott your mic. What are you, what is that? What is Jill Scott in the mic?
Starting point is 01:44:16 Oh, you don't know. What is that? He's so white. Hey, can you use these two fingers instead so I can relate? What the fuck? Just go like, no, did you just see that? Dude, you see it, I'm filling up in my pants right now. What the fuck?
Starting point is 01:44:29 The first time my packet came out of my nuts in a month. What, you got a jolt? Yeah, look at that, what is she doing? What is she doing? That looks like helping you relate. I want to play this song. I got a couple songs, next we're going to play another song that fans said.
Starting point is 01:44:42 This song really made me laugh. You guys are the best fans in the world. Please go to my patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. Become a member of your fan here. Go there and do the five dollar. Don't do the one dollar. Come on, it's a cup of coffee. Support the show because it supports everything we do here.
Starting point is 01:44:55 Riacast.com, we get some big news dropping with Riacast. Riacast very soon. A lot of great shit happening. A lot of more great shows are coming to riot cast. And you guys are the best fans of the world. I wanna thank, who's the person who wrote this? Do you know, well, it's not bonus. Yes, oh, is this that one?
Starting point is 01:45:13 Oh, is this the girl one? What's the girl one I sent you? This is the one he sent me. Oh, Mike. Don't blame Mike. The sticky sour. I mean, it was so smooth. Thanks for going so well.
Starting point is 01:45:24 Yeah, yeah, but that's not very very charismatic I'm gonna jump out of there. I'm gonna rock up your trail of lies. Unbelievable. I'm gonna rock up your trail of lies. Back to your shitty jobs. Shitty jobs. Check out riotcast.com for all of the best podcasts on the internet. And they're all free. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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