Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Butt, Stomach, or Swallow

Episode Date: February 20, 2017

This week on YKWD: We have Luis J Gomez, Dan Soder, and Rosebud Baker! Deepu and Lauren exchange passive aggressive love letters, we take a call from someone trying to call another podcast, and we discuss the viability of semen-infused foods. Watch / Listen and enjoy! RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude on the Riotcast Network Riotcast.com Welcome to the funniest podcast on the planet Earth. This is gonna be a clash to fire. It's podcast. No rules. I'm not gonna talk to the mic asshole. I'm sure I've already said should I regret it? Can I get a mic?

Oh, fuck the fuck. That was trying to keep it like a comic head. I have a bunch of guys on. It's just us sitting down Sometimes it's hilarious sometimes it's no topics no direction. I love doing it Side to the coin Do you think my podcast is popular? I might affect some of these lives. You never know. It's Robert Kelly, so you know what to podcast on whitecast.com. I For forever, but that but all right. Yeah, it's a good song. Hey, Bob. I just made it my words to it. What do you think? I love it Thank you Lauren for being a part of the team. All right. I forgot being one of the letters in team instead of C in the letter in the word team you're being you're you put the

deep who in wow look at that hat what the fuck is up with that hat well superbow long island superbow long island oh my god look at that fucking hat oh god oh god if anyone has one of those hats that says the Falcons won the Superbowl I would love one and I'll pay good money for it. I have a Guatemalan friend of mine. Have one of those. Hello What's up? Doing well, man. How are you doing happy Valentine's Day to both of you friggin bitches? I was gonna ask you what you mean my Valentine? Star you don't want me to be your Valentine. Please

Yes, I'm your Valentine. Yeah, I got you chocolate and I got deep chocolate too. Oh, isn't that nice? It's the tiny one. Are you guys getting along? Yeah. We're getting along pretty well. Really? Yeah.

Oh. This is all nice. I was nice to hurt today because I learned that she recently got with a guy. I don't want to say no one knows this person. But everybody knows who it is. recently got with a guy. I don't want to say, you know, no one knows this person, but, uh, what do you mean? Everybody knows who it is. Everybody knows.

But she was telling me that she was telling me that, uh, one of the things she liked about this person was that he was nice to her. And when I realized that, I was like, I should have been nice to it. Yeah, and she was like, yeah, she's like really hot. She, yeah, she's hot and you're mediocre and you would have got. And the guy she's banging is definitely mediocre. I love you, Bob. And I want you to be my Valentine. I'll be a Valentine. Okay. What are you gonna do? Well, I'm fucking let you suck it

I'm gonna jerk off when you cheek. Oh, it's gonna come in one day flatten like a pancake Sorry, sorry, no dude. I deserve it. If she bang me, she would have come in here unsatisfied sexually Yeah, I'm satisfied with me. If she banged me, she would've come in here unsatisfied sexually. Yeah, I see. She's gonna be flat in unsatisfied with me. I really can't, I got a fray. And, well, not really deep blue, that's his culture. His mother won't let you marry you, let's get that hairy. I brought hair and pubic hair, do not connect.

She is not the one for you. Sorry. Anyways, it's Valentine's Day. Everybody happy Valentine's Day. If you have somebody call them right now, text them, send an emoji that you love them. Let them know. And if you don't have anybody, go jerk off in the bathroom. Oh, yeah, go jerk off in the bathroom. Lauren, look at the camera. Look at the camera.

What do you, what is that for snuff film people? I'm really congested. Who's your Valentine? I have a Valentine. I'm not going to say our name. Let's not have that. Make up a name. We're not going to investigate.

You have a girlfriend girlfriend. I have a girlfriend girlfriend. Is she Indian? No, she's not. Is she black? No, she's not. Is she Puerto Rican? No, she's not.

Is she white? It's an obscure. Is she Jewish? The point is she Puerto Rican no, she's not is she white. It's a it's an obscure she Jewish Well, the point is you know Hawaiian no, I Filipino no, I got some heart. Hey, shin a troll No, she's a good fan and she I got her some heart shaped ravioli today really I feel like that she's Italian no What is she she's Iraqi? She's Italian. No. What is she?

She's Iraqi. Oh my god. I'm in America. One of these days the fucking FBI is going to keep that door in. I do worry about that. Fucking we're all going to be wrapped up and detained. I'm going to miss a gig, Kazoo. I would be pregnant.

Because you and your fucking girlfriend, she's just using you. Some guy custom's going to be like, who is Deepu? Well, that's actually every crowd you have in form of what back at you for the fat joke Should I change my name is it too late to do that? No, you should keep your name because nobody has that name Deepu What's up? It's Deepu. Yeah, you're an idiot. What do you want to be Bob? What's your name Bob Rob Bobby? What should I call you? I'll go about an actual name what's your actual name umber deep dude. I'm calling you that from now on What's your actual name? Umber deep dude. I'm calling you that from now on Umber deep It's almost as bad as your songs for good for your bad friend speaking of which we have anything you guys

Yeah, I love deep who so much what? The I wrote him I'm gonna take a sip of my new bottle Raise it hooked up to your iPhone Okay, I'll use my sexy voice. Yeah, use your sexy voice Fucking smoking a parliament one hundred. No, I can't smoke anymore. Okay. Here we go deep. Oh Roses are red Violets are blue Deep who's a hairy monkey.

And I'm one too. Not sure. I'm excited when you don't call or text, and I love not seeing you. Isn't it funny that we're never gonna screw? Oh my god. That actually hurt. Sometimes you're mean. Sometimes you're nice.

Sometimes I want to run you over with my car when we're in a fight. Jesus You're truly a weirdo in every sense of the term. Hmm now get back on the computer. Are you fucking nerd? Is that it? That's it. That was pretty good. Yeah. I like that. I gotta put my little choppy hands in my I got to put my little chubby head back on the computer thing I bet you was sitting on that for months I actually gave her that line. No, I'm kidding. No, I dropped your Reese. That's God Go down Valentine get that get that Reese. Ah wait me get it again. That's so crazy. That's it. Get it again. Thank you, Lauren. Thank you,

Do you have a poem? I do. You do? No, this is queer. It's less of a... This is the queers that we've ever done. It's less of a poem. I thought we could just do a love letter.

A passive, aggressive love letter. Why is this? So yours don't rhyme. Yeah. That is bad. I want to choke on Reese's. Alright. Don't choke. You're my'm a joke on Reekies. Alright.

Don't joke. You're my Valentine. Dearest Lauren. Wow. Lauren Coobera. Lauren Who Caresa? Oh my God. My love for you shines like a headlight in a junkyard.

There are so many things I admire about you. You're semi-tolerable appearance. The way you don't tag me in YKWD Twitter posts. The way you get on stage and mumble early female comic premises. I love cats. Oh my god. My pussy is a metaphor. My pussy is a metaphor. Uh. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Hey, with just jokes just joking just just joking. Why is he in the Tracy Morgan just joke? He's joking you can joke a Fuck doing a kidney. I didn't really fucking a kid. You can't get me for that

You go ahead people do your thing. I do do do people Sometimes I despise you and then I realize what am I doing? She runs a show up stand up New York. Oh Honestly, I've come to appreciate your presence on the show because you know What would YKWD be without your occasional tale of how you contracted a disease? Oh, it would be two minutes shorter. Oh This is be this is my roast battle redemption. Wow.

Good for you. Yeah. I love you, Deepo. Anyway, well, I wrote a poem for both of you. You did? Yeah. Go fuck yourselves. OK.

You're lucky I took you off the streets of nowhere, Phil. OK. And let's do a good fan-bad fan and move the fuck on and get the show started We got a kicker show today. We got two of the regs regulators Yeah, all right. You didn't good fan bad fan. Yeah, do it do it. Do you get the same old thing? No nice Do you've inside the Congo jungle? There is good fan And there is bad fan. Oh my God. Yeah, it gets too good.

It's too good. I don't like that they're getting worse, but better. I know. I don't understand the production value. I'm learning all the wrong things at the right time. God damn it, God. What do we got? Our first good fan emailed you.

Woo. He emailed you personally. Chad Smith, he says, I just wanted to say I became a premium member in a little while ago, and I really dig the fact that all the older shows are available. Yes, they are.

I've pretty much left over 300. Yeah. That's right. He says I've pretty much left other morning radio shows. I listen, used to listen to, and just listen to YKWD on my way to work. Keep it up.

Hey, man, I appreciate that. Thank you for becoming a premium member. We're getting more and more premium members every day, and you can go to the website, you go to the app store, just on your phone. Download the, what is it? You know what, dude? The Robert Kelly's, you know what, dude.

Robert Kelly's, you know what, dude, Abbot's free. And there you go, become a premium member. It Robert Kelly's, you know what dude, that's. Robert Kelly's, you know what dude, that's free. And there you go, become a premium member. It's one, nine, nine a month. And you support the show. You get all over 300 of the back episodes. Any of the, we got creeps for kids up. We got another one coming up.

We got all these videos. I got one on ones up there. There's extra content, but you know, it's you supporting the show. What a great fan. Well, a great fan and I'm glad you like it But if you don't want to become a premium member, you don't have to Ten of the shows are always the latest ten are always available for nada. Go ahead All right first bad fan

Comments about last week's episode by dying bag me to on YouTube. So he smokes weed probably He says this lineup was too fucking july for me holy fuck How what was last week? Lisa Trigger Jared Friede Shouley. I was Joey and you're kind of like Jewish too. You have that I am very Jewish. I have some Jewish you know, I have Jew in me. I do you have that one I do I have a saw can Lazarus my foster dad I worked at a Jewish camp. I love I have Jewish friends Did you is that like did you I love being a Jewish camp. I love Jewish friends. Did you, is that like, did you get a photo? I love being an age photo.

I love just going there some days and just hanging out. There he is. The man, my friend. Danzo. So mad if Lewis was up here already. There he is. Flaville Bobby, look at you. Danzo. Why would Lewis be on time? That's what I was wondering. There he is Flabbit Bobby look at you

And so why would Lewis be on time that's what I was one why would Lewis ever be on time because I was early So I was like well, do you have little boys hanging with you now? What do you have a squad? Very very so for the 27 so boom. We got dance sodas in the house. We're doing good fan bad fan Right now yep, all right, so let's we're gonna introduce dance soda right now It dance soda dance soda here from billions from from I mean look it here he is. I mean look Let's just be right dance soda from the Mexican restaurant. That's how what I know from it's called I'm only kid 15th and third the guacamole kid and please please give me my proper title, which is senior lunch closer. And he I'm a real show when you wouldn't even name the restaurant because you might hit you in your head

was like I have to go back there maybe they're still but now you're a superstar on billions. No, I'm a peripheral character, but it's a very shut the fuck off. Oh, you are a high. Oh my God, what a sweet. Oh my God. See, that's a proper guest. Yeah. Just a proper human being. A basket of gifts every time.

I don't know. Maybe you were obviously a chocolate dot something with friends for how long? I want to. You're on billions. I care about your health. You make billions. I care about your health. You make billions.

Whenever in a history of your friendship has it been cool for me to show up on Valentine's Day with a gift for you. Every fucking, every lonely Valentine's Day. When I waited for you and you didn't show up. I don't like flat bill Bobby. I don't like your, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like. By the way, what?

Owner of the Patriots. Yes. Robert Kra. Yes Yes, I know was at the billions premier last night. Of course you of course your lucky life would have I didn't know I don't know you'll talk to Bill Jackson. Ha! Jackson. Oh what that's really great. I'm good. You look adorable by the way. Oh, thank you. We should be an Amsterdam right now Looking at wooden shoes. Yeah You're as that was she sitting. Yeah, that's where you're sitting sweaty up Rosebud does look striking You like an exchange student sweet. She does she looks like she should like Really I'm have soda, but you got the tall thing. I got the Viking blood. Yeah, well, I got the Viking nose Hey, that's actually cool. I take that there he is

Hey, that's actually cool. I take that. There he is. And then it was Jay Gomez. Why is he wearing the coat that every homeless guy wears where he exposes himself to women? Don't bring it up. Don't bring it up. That's a look at my dick on the train. That's a, that's a, it's so cold. I don't care about fucking, I don't care about fashion.

Yeah, that's Louis Gomez when he used to fly to the stand up in New York. Remember when he's carrying knife with him? Yeah, knife. Knife. Oh no, you had a knife, you put, you threatened your roommate with a knife. Where, where you sitting right over here, buddy?

Got you two coffees. You need two coffees today. Yeah. Nice. What are you doing? I don't like that you fucking order people around. You're on the rooftop? No, I didn't fucking order anybody around.

Do you wear a tank top? Yes, came from the gym, bro. Slaves, no sleeves, not a tank top, no sleeves. Can I tell you a story when I, not now, of course, the last time I got in a shape, I was probably two months into getting in a shape, but I started, you know, when you start to feel good, and I cut my sleeves off, that's where I was at, where you could, you couldn't show the side, it couldn't be tight, but I could have my arms out, walking out, one-thirty at night from the gym over here,

there's a tranny bar, right? Oh, right there, I used to walk by it, on Chambers Street, hope to get lucky. Right, no, right over here, a shiver. Okay, let's start throwing out random ones. That's the name of the tranny, Christopher. All of a sudden, tranny leans on one ass, she's becoming leans on one ass chick. Big ass Tranny.

And I'm waiting for my compliment. I start smiling. I'm like fucking, I'm like 30 feet away smiling. I'm walking up. She's there like that. I get up close. She goes, oh, Bobby, you fat. I still have this smile.

I was frozen. I was in shock. I was hurt so bad. I said, I'm working on it. I just went, that went home. I woke my wife up. I'm like, it's got fucking a Tranny. She's like, I'm working on it. I just went, that went home, I woke my wife up, I'm like, it's got fucking a change coming up. I'm doing the best.

She's like, it's a guy. Dude, it's a guy. That's a chick with a dick. Yeah, but that's okay. Cause I go to my steam rooms and my gems, right? That's how he makes extra money. Well, no, they don't call me fat. 85% of the time, the guy works up a boner.

Really? There's a gay guy in the steam, the guy works up a boner. Really? There's a gay guy in the steam room, and he gets a boner, and he makes eye contact with me. And what do you do, go, what do you do? I flex a little. Yeah. You go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go,

you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you

go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you go, you gocised cock I know but I say it and you get mad at it that's why I said so flat this is flat bill bobby a lot of new a lot of colleges and word flat bill yeah bobby is a jatrain oh god oh no what happened to you Bob have you done jatrain podcast I love it it's so much fun yeah but it's really hard. I was like, I was like, Jared, you know, like I hate these people. Like your fan base.

I hate that. I love this, to show us. We're on a social. We're on a social. Stay on this thing that you talk about. I'm sorry, because it's Valentine's Day, and I want to talk about love. So the guy's getting hard 85% of the time.

If you love to calculate this. If you go to a theater room in a gym in New York City, after 8 p.m. Yes, you will get you cocks act You can or you get jerked off and you don't even have to be that good looking because right now when I Any what I'm in a towel right the tells that they have it like the the gyms Yeah, I have to tie two together like I'm making a prison. That's what I do Just a good joke without

Oh No, there's just this is funny I'm so they're called act out body No No, there's just this is funny as is I so you second this guy's no, I'm not talking to cock about you want to say the Tows a deal right tells a jams I can get him to just touch this how I'm getting back I got it the touch now, so I get him to touch I I pinch it then I think another towel and I go from the other side So it's and I tuck it in around the whole thing two towels Can I just say this one you don't look like a fat animal another towel and I go from the other side. So it's and I tuck it in around the whole thing. Two towels. Can I just say this one? You don't look like a fat animal.

You're tricking everyone in to think that one towel fits you. But strictly from a physics standpoint. Yeah. One of those towels goes they both go. Yeah, it's true. Yeah, I say the time. There's no grab in half a one.

Yeah, I fucking full made it. I tied my towels together to make one towel. And I bumped into an adonis. Yeah. And both our towels fell off. And I bumped into an adonis. Yeah. And both our towels fell off. And I was just staring at his crown. There he goes.

Good, he, his cock was, his, that's where I got the V dick ab. Yeah. It was this fucking, it's just this muscle that held this massive dick up. Did you do one of those sitcom bump into? We go, hey hey watch where you're Oh I

Wanted we have a caller if you want to take it. Yeah, we oh We have a call call 9 5 4 6 no no no no no no no no no no do that what don't ever do they want friend I'll say no they're calling cuz they want friends. You get shoot man. You get sued this Hole on the phone right now whoever it is. They won't sue me buddy nine five This is Robert Kraft six eight three the owner of the prairie. That's our mystery. He was head back up to I got shut up. This is my show. Say you're on with the fucking Bob in the bill. He does so many podcasts He doesn't know when he's not host. Yeah, this hammer. This is herifesting. What year is this? Dude has James been born

From the future if he was on how sonny our next call I wait Hello speak you're on the YKWD You're on the YKWD. How you doing? I'm sorry, man. Listen, I wanted to speak to Kevin. I obviously got some sort of wrong number. Oh, we use the same number as Missouri Loves Company, so he's calling for that. Why do we use? You can talk to him.

I'm Kevin's right here. Kevin, what are you doing? Hey, what's up? I'm jealous of my brother. Hey, Kevin, I'm sorry, man. Stay feeling. I'm sorry. I got the number by mistake. Are you on the end now?

No, no, no, no, we're just warming up, we're getting ready for a show. Okay, I just want to call and say hi. You doing alright? Yeah, man, what's going on? Um, sorry, I was in the, I came looking for you last night, but I, uh, um, I couldn't tell you. What would you, what would you, are you going to be in town for the whole week? Well, would you come look for me? Uh, she's like the seller.

Oh, yeah. No, yeah. Don't come there anymore. They don't want you there. Why are you so rude? It's like Kevin and Braden person. Are you sure about that? Yeah.

You're a fucking faggot. I'll punch you with a fucking face if I ever seen you again. You fucking bitch. This is why Lewis can't be very close. All right. Listen. This is why I'm going to fuck your wife. You understand? I'm going to go. I'm going to fucking bitch. This is why Lewis can't be perfect. All right, listen. This is why I'm going to fuck you wife. You understand? I'm going to have him fucking Brennan.

I'm Kevin Brennan. I'm going to fuck you wife. I'm going to have to jack up. I'll have to jack up. What's wrong with you? We can't have anything. You ruined everything. Show up at the seller.

Like, did you hear that Kevin Brennan was murdered? I started getting into the character. I think they're a pretty good job. I want to say something. That was a little creepy the way this guy was talking. Yeah. I was looking for you. And it was very easily convinced that that was Kevin.

I started getting the accent down. No, you did not. No, you did a retarded one without a dumb. You did a different accent every time you went on. You did. You did. You did deaf Kevin Brennan. I thought, I thought, you know what, I thought, I thought, I'm a half.

I was. Did you not say me? He and Wilson throwing down my hat. You have my way. Did you not say me? He and Wilson Vince had a kid. You were just that. Why are you? Why are you? Why are you?

Don't come down to the sun. Mike now? What? On Mike pulling up content. Yeah, he's doing a lot of shit. I don't know what's happening here. Why this is such a thing? I don't know.

It's like time traveling on WIQWB. I only get invited every six months or so. Every time I come in, it's a deal. Oh white kid at B.D. I only get invited every six months or so Every time I come in We all know it's not a what we all know you dumb Why is there no A conflict yeah, I feel like I'm It's a mic right there Who wouldn't I'd take a ride on that

But she wanted to she didn't think you're interested What I'm getting Is that your threat that was the threat that you're going to reveal that yeah Did I say that? Why did I say that? I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Is that your threat? That was the threat that you're gonna reveal to. Yeah. I love it. That's a good thing for her.

She specifically said don't say it on the show. I love fucking you with you. It's the first thing. It's the first thing. The first thing Louis Daz is trying to say it on the show. This is why you'll be alone in a few years. But Louis, as soon as Louis turns 50, everybody's dumping him.

But politically, yes. He lost the power by letting it out originally. Buddy, you're supposed to just... Here's where you take the power. But she nullified it by telling Bobby. But she doesn't care. Because it's not like it was a... No, it was a short story. It was Mike Lawrence, we'd all be like,

well, don't tell anybody. Oh, that. Yeah, name it. That's fine, piece of knowledge. Can you please cover your Hawaiian shoulders You really do yeah, you have little owl fucking arms Get take it off baby take it off. Yeah, I feel good You're like the shower

Well, yeah, you want to get head more you do have all inclusive shoulders. It really does you look like you work in an all-inclusive resort all-inclusive shoulders. He really does. You look like you work in an all-inclusive resort. You have. I'm getting a little out of flight though. I gotta like it. I think the bomb, Dan never gets a bomb, Dana, because Bobby Kelly wants to suck your cock. And he giggles the fucking time.

Giggles like a flirty middle schooler. You're just mad every time you open your mouth. A medical every time you open your fucking mouth. I've had the bomb in so many times. Bobby Giggling. And I fucking hit his arm. His arms, he's like a lesbian that lost weight. That's what his arms look like.

See, I'm giving that nothing, cause it deserves nothing. Whoa! No. You're not the funny. No, he's not funny. No, you're right, he's a homosexual for you. He wants to lick your butt hole. Hey, go.

Ask me, ask me truth to me. Yes. I want a fucking. I want a fucking. He's not billion. I I will fucking he's a billion He's a fucking series regular. I don't know on a show that has No, they don't make billions Everybody in the show makes billion

I was on thousands One season I'm done. I really want to say something to you though, because this is weird to me, because I've been in Steamrooms before. In New York it happens a lot. They closed the crunch steam room over here, because guys were just fucking fucking hell. It was just crazy.

At what level though? Real quick. Is that really why they closed it? Yeah, there's too much dick socket. That's the baby with statement. Well, they had to cut it because people thought there was a breachies factory inside of the truck gym. They they they had it it was too much because regular people

go in and just the steam and this guy's just sucking and digs out and it's like and they got to go before eight. Go on, you go in different gym. No, it's everywhere. How would you ruin it for a moment? Homosexuals are everywhere. There's a, there's a lady's gyms. No, no, every gym in New York City that has a steam room,

eight o'clock at night. Even a woman's gym. No, there's not. That'd be funny if that was such a thing as a woman's gym. That'd be funny if they really took over women's steam room still. Ladies, listen, we got to, we, we got no boxes in the box.

There's no room at our steam room. We got to use slam and licks and plus and say p.m. I am a bunch now When I lived on 40 third street in the in the high rise building the dorm and building yeah They had a steam that a full gym amazing gym half basketball court and they had a steam room And when I moved in I was like this is the greatest shit ever This is a gym and it had a thumbprint you to get in the thing 24 hours me Keith Kevin Hart we always to play basketball like two in the morning in my place They had this steam room and I went in one time and there was just two dudes in there and I kept it going shit

There was enough room. Thank God. I didn't try to squeeze in That would have been so first off inconsiderate But also I'm willingly would I have fucked up a date? I didn't try to squeeze in. That would have been so first off inconsiderate, but also. But unwillingly, would I have fucked up a date? Yeah, they're all wrong. And they wound up shutting it down. Like you couldn't use it past eight o'clock, like he's saying. I passed eight o'clock, you couldn't use the steam room

because guys, they could control it. I've fucked in Sauna's before a couple times. What was his name? Hey, I made the couch laugh. Let's introduce the couch real quick before we get back to the Steam Room cocksuck and couch. It looks like they also live on a couch. That was a good one.

That was a good one. What's up? What's your name, tall boy? Sawyer. What? Sawyer. Hold the mic. The mic. The mic.

The mic. The mic. Keep the mic, Nanny and Mouse. We don't have to keep talking. You know, microphones work. Yeah. Sawyer. Dude, I love this. You are the worst soda I've ever met. Hey, Sawyer. Sawyer, where are you from, buddy?

Uh, Byron, New Jersey. What the fuck is that? It's out in the middle of nowhere. Alright, cool. And is this your friend? Is your buddy? Do you know each other? Yeah.

Alright, give the mic to him, Sawyer. What's your name, dude? I'm Vinnie. Vinnie. You don't look like a Vinnie. Yeah, you look like a Turk. Turk. Yeah, Turk.

Yeah. Turk. Yeah. Inie. I know. Yeah, you look like a, like a Turk. Turk. Yeah, Turk. Yeah. Yeah, maybe a Kyle. Maybe a Colin.

I didn't know Turk was a name. A Colin, yeah, it's good name. Bastion. Bastion. Bastion, booger. Yeah, not Vinnie. Vinnie. Are you sure?

Bastion, booger. Are you Italian? 100%. Not 100%. You got a mailman in your 100%. You're Italian? Fighting. You got a mailman in your pants. You're fucking yeah. You are.

You are. You are an Italian Mrs. DiCarlo. And you're an 94% Irish. You guys know where a pot of gold is. Yeah, hey, blotchy elbows. Somebody fucking Irishman. He's like, you think you're on the same Italian? I guarantee your mother doesn't make sauce. Grave it! We've been waiting for a run!

I'm telling you, it's not the mom that's the problem. It's the father. Yeah, do you listen to me brother? Mom doesn't tell you. Yeah, you're not fucking full of Italian kid. I'm sorry, look, when you smile, your lip goes away. Okay, that doesn't happen with Italian. Ask your dad if your mom would disappear for a second. You're not gonna full Italian kid. I'm sorry. Look you you have when you smile your lip goes away

Okay, that doesn't happen with the ties ask your ask your dad if your mom would disappear for three hours every weekend I got real wow Why did Lewis say it looks like it's a threat because everything's asking mother come on ask your father who runs things around Hey, when he has sex you woman eat your pussy Come on ask your father who runs things around. Hey, everyone has sex. You want me to eat your pussy? Now Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, Will you pass them candy that's that's for you? That's candy boys candy boys Now take your dick. I'm Lewis and these are my sauna boys So are you and Vinnie We got a new podcast cut on the suck

And can I come with fans when I come you stop we're going I don't like the bottle I'm coming back. Do it again. I'm on the opposite way. What happened? Dude, that's a gift. You look like Rosie O'Donnell. What the fuck are those arms doing?

Lunch lady arms. Wow, dude. You have, you do, you have Salisbury steak arms. Let me see that. The underneath, dude. Try to make the other flex. Wow. That's that bad.

Dude, you have like, I'm gonna see your fucking arm dude I would never do that. I'm not an idiot fucking others underneath your arms. Not as bad as that. Yeah guaranteed I guarantee you fucking take it off I'm not gonna take it off, but I will roll it up like you cuz you didn't take it off too fat So get rolling up well, but you got it. It's just fucking sausage is stuck out of a bigger piece of sausage Fucking who you think you're fucking bigger than anything wiggling But you got it's just fucking sausage is stuck out of a bigger piece of sausage Who you fucking bigger than anything wiggling? Bob is anything wigglin?

It's just a fucking thick one my wiggling You lose you get louder and angry Look at you What the fuck do it to me? Do it to me I'm not Fuckin Are you kidding me tonight. I'm not doing it tonight. I'm not doing it tonight. What's going on? Are you kidding me?

Dude, I'm not listening. We're going to... Dude, my mouth looks like this. I don't need my fucking thing. Is there any jiggle fat? You guys look like the first... Not again! Fucking not done!

Because... I'm gonna hate flat-null bubble. You guys both hit him until he did that. You guys both look like the first round contestants in the first UFC. The very first UFC. We're like, this is a super-coffee era. Oh, these two better. These two that are between this and a bar.

It's not on a ball. It's got for us. What the fuck are you? Oh shit. His name, too, dudes, I don't even know if they're real, but... That's not for us, real. Parah, you're a parah. I want to show you guys He's his name too, dude. I don't even know if they're real but it's not for us real Paras, yeah I want to show you guys that I can go real and I can improve my

Did you just lose too much too fast? Is that what happened? No Rose must go to the point. I'm coming back He's got the he's got skin bands. Yeah, he came up too fast got skin bands. The bags like you man. He came up too fast. Louis looks like that pool you bought at fucking Kmart for that party and then a two weeks later and we'll just keep going and I'll fucking drive it into the ground. And then a month later you fucking go out and the pool is still out there with the drain in it. You want to empty it but it's ready to lift up and then you try to lift it up.

But the backside is deflated but the front side isn't trying to blow it up But again boom! So wordy is joking the world champion. Everybody got those arms though. I do have those arms. You're at a breath from speaking. No, I added that to the character. That's flat Bill Bobby.

It's always so. Hang up, wait. Hey, I really do. Have you ever, now, as women? Yeah. Have you ever, all women? No, when you go to a, you go to a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a, a I'm sure like, No, can I say why? Why? Because a box in a steamer, nobody wants to lick sweaty sleeves.

He's gonna stay right there. Exactly. I stepped on your joke. I'm so done. I'm gonna joke, it's just the truth. A cock is adding a body, a little sweat runs down and who gets the shits. It's definitely like shit, please.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I think gay sets. Doesn't smell like shit. A punts and an asshole in a steamer. Yeah. It's the most, I cannot even imagine how bad that would sound. That's almost like taking an Italian sub and opening it up and leaving it in a hot room. Yeah, and then go back.

Hey, what's some of this? You guys are taking a fucking popsicle and they let it melt a little bit. It's a little better. Yeah, it's a little better. A little better. No, what? Yeah, man, it looks a melted popsicle. Oh, sorry, do you like it?

Do you like it? Do you like it? Why is that always your go to that? It's a little better. It's nice. No, what? Yeah, man. You look so melted popsicle. Oh, sorry, Julian. If you take a shower. Why is that always your go to that? Sorry, billions. You know, like, on-wrapped Christmas presents? Like, you don't like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, you like, grown up, he's,

because you have a soul, Hockendash Poss. Yeah. That's why I do it. I just hate Hockendash Poss. Yeah, those real fruit bars that have real piece of fruit. Yeah, but he, but old.

But these guys who is fruit bar guys. That's why he's here I'll keep going. I'll fucking worthy this up and they put the fruit bar in their hands And they make them and they bring them over to them and he looks at me. He's like not called gelato. You got her trash Gelato that was is not the same thing. So this is something. I think you're right, but yeah, I think that was eating a pussy Would it can I say something're right, but yeah, I think that would it. Can I say something? No, I think you got it down. Show's over. Sorry, see you guys later.

I think that would it be, why is it somehow? Is it more offensive? Guys in a steam room sucking each other off and doing weird shit, then walking in on a few women who are kissing and rubbing each other's vagina. That's hot. Would it would women walk into that? And be offended? I'd be offended.

No, I don't think I'd be offended. You wouldn't. If two girls were eating each other's pussy's in a steam room, you would just walk in and go. I would just say enjoy. I like the hand up. Look at how they're here. I let you lick this, but you know what?

Ladies, it's too hot now. I shot at the fuck down. Get your fucking dick out of his mouth right now I'm trying to enjoy my thing. You know like it's gross streaming these mics work Do you do it like a cat on a counter? You go hey? Hey? Get down. No, I have a spray bottle. Oh Me, me, me, me, I'm the same joke of the same. We will have a spray bottle What does that say about me? No, can I say another reason why?

I know there is why it's not as offensive to the ladies because you guys are destined to fucking a steam room Guarantees you won't write that down Destined to up in a steam room. Go ahead. Can I can I tell you another thing? Please can you not? There's those chubby fingers to do it. There's no Sploge that comes out of the ladies unless you're really good There's not sploge. It's pee by the way. I know Fucking West Coast comic. There's no sploge that comes out. So here's my thing, when I walk into two dudes

sucking each other off, my immediate thing is, I don't want to fucking slipping slide through your cum on my way to sit down in the steamer. How much, how much does making that make? I wouldn't be that, hang on though. You, I wanna say something, something Fucking moron like he always does He's not a dumb Because that is it

He's not dumb because But he always surprises me you just said that like you were so always surprised me because Listen because he what he says Because he shocks my brain He said, he said, he's the last word that is deathbed. Because he shocks my brain. Because the way he says it, it sounds stupid because he's saying it. But then if you break it down, you're like, that's actually pretty smart.

It's not the fact that you guys are sucking each other off whatever, or jerking each other. Fine, but at one point, some a bunch of kids are gonna shoot out of somebody's cock and in a hot wet steamy room It's gonna it's gonna turn to egg quickly. Yeah, and I know it and it's you can't see and now I'm gonna walk out with something on my tone Yeah in between your toes the idea of Dudes in between my toes. That's not yours. Are you saying Lewis? Mine is kind of grossing really think about it

Well, I think it's the worst. When you jerk off in the shower, I try to literally finish off in the drain. No, I never jerked in the shower. Shhh! You're sniffing me! Can you guys, I'll tell you why. I'm gonna tell you two days.

You bend down. And I squat down and I kind of whip it in. I'm gonna go from toilet bowl sometimes that way. Yeah, it's a good place to do it. You should, you should. You're into the bowl. I'm gonna tell you why you shouldn't do it into a deep squish. You shouldn't do it in the bowl or the shower

I it cost me $350 The plum the the the drains my wife has beautiful black hair, right and You know women see you have a woman's hair comes out first. Well, they don't take showers with that They have to take it off. It's a wig Black people don't take showers. No, they take to take it off. It's a wig. I was literally saying black people don't take showers. No, they take showers. I'm saying black girl wears wigs. But they have hair too.

Black women have hair. I know I was a joke. Listen, so there's a lot of hair on the drain. I was jerking off. I loved it with the shower. That's how I was get the bench. What a hair? Or jerking off of the drain.

Well, this hair and giz. It goes in the hair full of hair. Oh, hi. Those have reached and you got these two broads. Oh. All right, a handful of hair. Oh. Oh, hi. That was a reach and you got these two brods. Oh. All right, and one couch guy. But barely. You were just calling Lewis J. Gomez, Yogi Barra.

That was a lot of money. That was gross. Ah, the fucking picnic bear. I love that guy. No. So, the guy goes to me and goes, you have to tell your way to stop pouring bacon grease in the drain. No, excuse me.

Bobby, you come bacon grease, you fat fucking. So I go, so I go, so I go, so I go to dawn. I go to dawn, not even thinking. I go, hey, honey, stop pouring the bacon grease or whatever grease down the drain. She goes, I never pour anything down the drain. Bob, you know, I put that in a cup for you to drink every morning. So I fuck it. He can't, he just, he got one and then he's gonna say,

they all left. Now he did, she didn't, she didn't, he went like, they all left through, it's on camera. Damn, it's in, damn, damn, damn, damn it like this, it's in, everyone is in the room. It's fucking Kirk. Of course he's gonna left it from Hicksville, USA. He thinks he's Italian.

Look at him, the fuck. Top of the morning, Judy, I'm gonna get in here. One mobster did some time on fucking Chitsville, Italian One mobster did some time on fucking shit spill bang this mom. I'm Italian named the video You know your mind listen here's a deal I And then it me hit me like oh my god. I've jerked off so much in the shower It hit it turns to egg When you jerk off a hair come ball it turns to and then deep who crawls out of your It's the the jizz when it gets hot in hot water. It turns white like a yo Five times

Come into a frying pan. Yeah, it's like, this is your come on eggs. I wonder, I think somebody has come into a frying pan. Buddy, I've heard something that looks like this. Yeah, we gotta do that. Say it definitely, Jesus Gangs. I don't know, I don't know. I wanna see that right now. I do it.

Listen, I'm writing it down for me. I'm scared it's gonna be amazing. Nobody's fried, I'm frying, Tom, and putting it on you. I love that Louis things, I love that Louis things writing it down as typing it on his phone It's a me Departed down to me learn after you've been touching that other guy Well, can you see if somebody has cut you? You see if somebody has cooked their calm hang on in different ways settle down. No settle down

When you when come hits hot water, it turns into egg, right? I know what you're saying. Let him answer. You're an idiot. Let him answer. Bob, you're not explaining it right. No, let him answer. Here's what he's saying.

When you come into water, it turns into like a fucking like an egg drop soupy type thing. Yes. It doesn't turn into an egg. You're not explaining that. I'm saying, fucking the the the yoke. I mean, the um, the if you look in the common water, yes, he's right. It looks like a like almost like

I got it turns white, but you're saying it turns into an egg. I'm not saying it turns into egg. I'm saying it turns into egg Not on egg not with the shell and the yellow stuff. I'm saying eggy. What do you want? I'm not wrong. You know when you come in a hot shower when it hits the ground it turns white. Do you know that young man? I think it's come on. I picked a fucking Micah Bunger the mic you tall glass of water When you come in your right and it turns white like an egg right and what about you Tony? It's ventures They get sticky like an egg like white right yeah, so now now how am I fucking wrong three against you?

I already turned to an egg. Nothing you know what I'm talking about why you boy? Why you get mad at me? Because you're not taking a side new to and Swedish Dan. Oh look Kevin Brennan's friends calling you. Oh, it's another person Can I get Kevin Brown? I guess Hey, what's up? I was having Kevin Brad and Hello person. Hey, what's up? Hey, what's up? What's up, it's Kevin Brad. Hello. Hey, what's going on? Hey, what's up, buddy? How are you doing?

Who is this Lewis? No, Lewis is here. Dan, everybody's here. Listen, here's the deal. Okay. When you come in a shower with hot water, does it turn eggy? Listen, Bobby, I love you and I love Dan. I love Lewis. I'm a tattoo guy. That's okay. Hey, buddy. What's up, Kira? Love. Oh, it's cute. Caramella is the best.

He's the best. My buddy. Now, Bobby, I've heard the story three times, bro. Which one? Fucking way your come has caught the drain to the point of plumbers coming. Body. Does every service guy get on your liar? Your come has caught the drain to the point of plumbers come body Service guy on your liar You're coming That's Okay, let me respond to keep let me respond to this comes like baby oil Let me respond to this fucking tatted cock sucker

Listen to me you fucking fatso. He's huge. First of all, he is big. I'll take it from you. I'll take it from you. You will take it from me, because I'm a fatty. You're going to take it from underneath Lewis's arms.

Listen. How are you fat in two places? Listen, Keith. Yeah, bro, listen to me. Shut up. Shut up. You're not explaining nothing. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. You're not explaining nothing. Shut up.

Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut your face. Yeah, and you don't pay the bills. You fucking, you cock sucker that lives with your mother. Okay, you haven't paid a bill. You're a tattoo artist.

You make fucking 850 a week. Okay? It takes you seven months to do one fucking tattoo. You can't speed it up. I got a waiting list. Get a week. Okay? It takes you seven months to do one fucking tag. You can't speed it up. I got a waiting list. Get it together. Make a couple hearts in a ship. Move on.

I think we just found a flat building. Flatville, there. Flatville, there. There's a deal. Trigger. Now I have pipes. Now, when they, in the 1950s, I'm going to explain this to you, because you don't know the fucking home.

This cock sucker, this home was a lot soupier. This cock sucker has a fucking, has a townhouse in Jersey somewhere next to a lake. Listen, they sort of put an additives in the food. They thickened up the taste. It was like, you know, let me get this fucker. Chicken broth. All right, listen characters.

Ha ha ha ha ha. I got, my pipes are old, okay? I had to replace the inner pipe to make it bigger. It was a small pipe. Now the gizz The holy hair goes in the drain. There's a fucking Can you tattoo the bomb band in on your face? Did you hear that? Nothing fatso. So anyways Did you hear that? Nothing fatso. So anyways. He's got a point. Well, you lean in heavy billions this episode. Not with him. No, but on me. He said, oh, no, you're just saying that because it's on you, you fuck.

Listen, hey, fatty fat fuck. That's all I got. I'm gonna fucking rip his Pope and poster up to you. You cock suck. Shut the fuck up. Shut up. Don't be a bully. Don't be a bully. Shut up. You're a bully. You calling up my show being a cunt Listen the fact is I just didn't stop saying. Oh, what are you a fucking shitty crowd? Oh, ah Listen, I just did my thing my hair got fucking cooked in it after two months of coming Fucking twice a day in a sink. Stop, Rose walked out.

Okay. The drain got clogged up. So don't fucking question me. Can I say something now? Can I say something now? Hold on, hold on, I can't. I can't keep it. Keep one second.

Can we acknowledge the way that Deepu tells the joke? Like he throws the joke out with no confidence. It was fucking unbelievable. He just told the joke that was pretty funny. That was a good one. It was a pretty good one. It was a joke. I didn't even fucking see it happen.

He listened to Deepu. It's crazy. Have you heard the show? It's like Scopo moved on and Deepu moved into the whole. No way. Stop it. He's way better. Are you nuts?

Can I tell you why it's way better? Buddy, He speaks less. No, he's listen. He's way funny than Scopo. But anyways, his thing. Look at he's got a computer, a phone, and a TV in front of him. Scopo didn't even have a fucking piece of paper with a pencil. But Scopo had to blink and that's difficult. Scopo was constantly thinking of disappointing his father That's why I'm He's coming in I think he's coming he texted me he's coming in after the show Bobby

I didn't want to commit on the show deliver in boxes was shit. No, now how's he doing good? I don't know he left my show too Skopo left ever all the good podcasts that he was on to go be in some shitty apartment podcasts where there's roommates that nobody's ever heard of. What's the show called? I don't know, my apartment friends. Sweet bodies. What is it? Sweet bodies. Sweet bodies are sweet bodies. Sweet bodies are a better show.

Sweet bodies are sweet bodies. Sweet bodies are sweet bodies. And then she do it. And then she do it from a steam room. It's just about scobo's ass. Like the others' dicks. Yeah, and every month they have to fucking pay a plum a 350 bucks

to clean the drains There's no way that's true No way, she's doing it You know what? Lewis and I still you got so angry at Keith but Lewis and I are still on the truth or

a vlog right now call my wife Don't call the wife call the guy that fixed it Call him right now I want to hear the fucking Yeah I also want to know how you're from a licensed plumber a licensed plumber. He's Mexican. How am I gonna Yes, see the man? I'm gonna get a license plum. Okay. What do you want? What is this fucking a law

No, you want me to make sure you I don't have a license plumber. I got a Mexican dude with a truck He's an inside job. Why don't we just Google it come can Those books hang on one second. He just went on a fucking rambling. What'd you say? He sounds like it's tattoo gun I thought he was still on the line. Yeah, so didn't we Hair on the other hand more clogger than what hair with jizz can Can't just one it's just combo slow just combo. Okay on the other hand will clog a shower drain. Yes, let me read it Why would you? That's what I'm saying hold on go what the fuck is he what are you a flip flop? Please don't please never wiggle your arms again or will throw up. Why?

Please don't please never wiggle your arms again or will throw up. Why? Watch Flap away you need to put you need sleeves. I just came from the gym. I know but you need sleeves shut the fuck you need sleeves You need to buy you sleep. You need a fucking body sleeve. I need you need sleeves You need a fucking you can't subject anybody working out near you to those flaps those arms It's like your arms need waist trainers. You know, you've got the old right. It was all right.

Yeah, but he has to do the act though. Yeah, I love every time Lewis gets a hit. He looks at the other people. No, don't. That's not true. He tries to bully you out of your laugh. I take it better than anybody else in the world. Yeah, you do.

Yeah, you do. Shut up. Hair on the other hand will clog a shower drain. One of the reasons that it forms a mat on which other things can stick. The end result can be something that is resistant to the flow of water. Seeming would contribute to that build up of residue. Thank you. On the hair.

Keith, go fuck yourself. Get him up by itself. Go fuck yourself, Keith. That's right. Hey, Keith, go fuck yourself. This is Robert Kelly, Dark. Hang on, Keith. Keith, Keith, Keith.

My mother's 80s. Keith. Mother's 80s. Keith. Keith. Dude, we just hang off Keith Keith Keith my mother's 80s I don't fucking I might not have a lot of things but I got truth and vulnerability solid fucking and dobo your arms That don't move. Yeah, but they don't move I'm like you, unlike you're fucking, you're fucking, ugh, something happens. Do I get that whole thing? Something out there.

What happened? Did you stop learning how to speak ever since you got a fucking TV show? Oh, dude, dude, there's a fucking good period right there. We're off. I love the dance, dance so beautiful though. He knows when, when he's got it and when he doesn't. Oh, I'm watching you gorilla sign to each other right now. I'm just watching fucking dance bits of science.

We can't completely descend to it. I don't know what to do. To me, you're gonna be here when we're 16. And Dan's gonna be just walking by looking up with a fucking beautiful, like all fat, like a limousine and some gunga then assist in a beautiful wife. I looked at the Bobby still to me the highlight of the episode. Bobby's saying that sentence where he goes sometimes he's just stuff that's

so wrong. So yes. So there you go. Cheers. Going bad. Let's go back. Because you have me. I said that I said hair. I said her hair that. I said hair. I said I hair. I said I hair. I want to go back to your point originally. Take me back. And I'm keep just fuck somebody's tattoo up. He's so mad. The other one was a deck called.

What are you doing out? I didn't say back in the hour. I just made an arrow on your Indian. Listen, I think your point is right. It's not the fact that the guys are, if a girl's like, licking each other, whether there's no mask, there's no nothing. A bunch of guys, if a guy jizzes in a, in a steam room that's disgusting.

Yeah, and there's not always swallowing it. You know, they're gonna sometimes just spit it on the other dudes' chest. What do you do? I, I know. So microphone is such a lords face, there's such a mattress. Oh, I love, I love the Lewis one. I, it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it.

I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it.

I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it.

I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I really want to have somebody cut. Somebody cut. You might saw this on live, a bubble. Why don't you do it? Why don't you try it? Well, I don't want to fuck it. Yeah, what happens? What happens when you come science?

I'll do it. I'll do it. I'll do it. If you eat your com after you come into a frying pan, is that cannibalism? Oh, no. That's not cannibalism in general. Fry come, can you get a good,

scrambled comb? Yeah, is that an egg white? Can you add onions? Can you add the, the, the, the, the, the Trinity and make a Western omelette? Yeah. I don't even think drinking, hey, can I ask you a question?

Yeah. Who here has eaten come? All of us. Obviously. I have an eaten come. You think you're on come? No. Why would I ever eat medium?

Never try. It's not even like a pig. You're not a dog. Yeah. Yeah, that's what we're talking about. I'm talking about fucking, I think you even like a pink Yeah, yeah, that's what we're talking about I'm not talking about fucking I like Like what like a lot I've jerked off on time and like a main course I hit I hit I hit So you never you never went on like a sauce I don't remember doing it like Vinnie's mom

I know she goes a bunch of come recipes on here We are making come food on Legion's Gang, so we're eating it. We're eating each other's com on the show. We need some of these. All right, so we have a couple recipes here. First is here. We have a creamy com crepes. Let's just hard to say.

What is a creamy com crepes? Creamy com crepes. That's a good Valentine's Day food. Creamy com crepes. Creamy, creamy com crepes. Creamy com crepes. Creamy com crepes. Creamy com crepes. Creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy,

creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy, creamy and one third cup of butter. That's fun if you skip over the sea mineral. You got some fairly recipe. Two eggs, two tablespoons of sugar, some branch of sugar, some tea canals. We've all eaten calm in a fast food restaurant. There's no way the amount of food that we do have a claim so much calm. What does it mean? You eat in a little kym amount of calm.

You're gonna be stomach pumped. People have came here. I'm only shitting people after I get my food. When he to be stubborn, pumped. People have came, I'm only shitting people after I get my food. When he shits, it's white. Yeah. It goes all over the thing. It's like ivory. I'm like a sick bird.

There was a captain carved a ship out of one of his booze. Yeah. I shouldn't bird ship. I was like, can't he run to use anymore? I've got the birds' It's a good. Oh. And so what goes into it? What goes into it? What goes into it?

We can go to the match out. Because I remember when I was- Hang on, let him read this. I want to hear what the recipe is. Whisk together the powdered sugar and melted butter, fold in the cottage cheese and semen, spoon the filling into the crepes and serve right away. It's better.

You have to fold it in though, because if it goes in too hot, it's going to- You got a car. It's cold. Yeah, what happens when you give it goes in too hot, it's gonna You got a card What happens when you cook it though? What happens to see him? Comic-Con mix just on lovely cramps Comic-Con mix Tink-Toolings What do you want to do, Frisier?

Two-Tooled assholes of coke-pants No, what is he doing? Tink-Tooled, come cook me They have it somebody did it sperm and a hot frying pan Get your dicks out now, oh it's a song dude goes in D key. Oh, oh Just come I don't know I could watch it did Jizz and porn, but watching the rest of the stuff.

Make it big. A full screen. I have to, I have adjusted a certain way. It has to be like this. Why? So that because we can only show how, like most of the screen right now for that, why are we killing the momentum? Yeah, just play.

Because I want what I want. But he's gonna break it. Do that. You are such an asshole. I want one and I want one I want but he's gonna break it to that you are such an asshole I won't run and I won't want now daddy You watch so much porn and that bugged me Because it was in such a nice come I have

Of course what happened it was the glass Oh, looks like context Hey Marty quit fucking around on the grill Turns to add you fucking phone He's really cooking it like an egg so it's pretty hilarious Just eat peel it. It turns to egg. This is so gross Oh please let this Stop stop I think I hear screaming I Want to pull back and it be a waffle house

Fuck that I wanted to pull back and someone's mad that he's taking this much time. They're like, we needed that order five minutes ago! Oh, see, it just burns, doesn't it? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, would have never stuck. The ones you get like the SCNRTV, you know the ones sometimes are blue and red. We got it, we got it. Infomersion, but we got it. You can get him in us. We got it. Sometimes on the SCNRTV section.

Yeah. All right. I think you just came. Go to the end, you fucking dumb fucking. Oh, looks like a egg. Oh, it's delicious actually. What does it look like, damn. I'm sorry, what does it look like, damn?

It looks like cheese. So what is, what is, what is, was I right? Oh wrong. You're right. You're not going in. What does it look like? I'm sorry. What does it look like? It looks like cheese. So what is what is what it was I write? Oh wrong. Thank you. What did it turn into? That's your name. That was so fucking gross.

That looks like a yeah. Well don't look at me. I'm not forgetting. That's not what I do with my name. Anybody who juggles is a fucking idiot. That's not true. Absolutely. That's a lot of it's really awesome and they can really tell early That's a fact Jugglers always kill themselves early in the morning Cuz they hit around 50 and they realized they learned stupid thing and it does nothing for them You know how cool I look to my son how cool very really yeah, what does he say daddy do it again? No, he calls be his new boyfriend daddy, but he calls me

Lua says Lewis. Can you do that thing buddy? Is that true kidding? Are you fucking kidding me? You're bringing up on the podcast so late heartedly. I absolutely I mean that's gonna happen But I just didn't know it happened so quick I want a 1000% say you would bring that up in a podcast in the way you just did right. I mean, the guy who's going to actually cook jizz on a live podcast. Because first off, why do you think I bring up something so hurtful? Anyways, next week on Legion of Skanks, we all drink come. And we all have come.

We all have here. We have come French toast next week. You got to take the latest episode. We did a charcoal facial masks to celebrate black history month. Can I say that's, I don't want to know anything about that on the show we both on television Lizzie Hi, I'm Dan Sorter from Showtime's Bill. Hi, I'm Robert Kelly. I'm a little shagomest from dozens That was so bad it was good sometimes they fucking swing around the moon fast

Wow, that was a shit one I'm dozens This motherfucker has niggles. Liz and you should, if you're gonna do Eat and Come, you should come. What you should do is you'll eat come. You should mix it with some egg. It's how funny it is.

And then, and then, and then make French toast. There's nothing funny about just eating come. You should stop eating to everyone in the audience. If you don't, my friend, all the legions thanks my come though. Liz, if you ate come and while you juggleduggle that's funny to me. That's kind of funny So I want thank you. What do you do for your way for Valentine's day? I'm gonna eat coming from her

I Didn't do it. I bought a I went to the store. Yes, they were max I let max pick out of any all the shit He picked out these stupid thing this and that is a car battery out of any other shit, he picked out these stupid thing this and that is some kind of car battery three. You know, it's a cool thing. I'm fucking ice scraper. Shit, Clips. Candles.

Well, no, I took him to the store with the Mudge of Valentine's stuff. Victory is a great thing. I have stuff, Dad. Dad, go figure it out. You know what your mom likes the way. Well, I'll talk about this in a second. Probably shouldn't't but they

they uh huh I like your face when I like this yeah so we picked out you know thing of chocolates blah blah blah blah and I and we went home and she she we oh happy Valentine's day because I knew I was gonna see her today because I'm here all day but she you know she did for me she literally had a book made of me and her cartoon characters and but she wrote it. So it's all, it's like the fucking, it was the best gift ever, and I'm sitting there. It's like a big book.

There's like all the things I love about you and even the theme of, blah, blah, blah, blah. The artwork looks like James and the Giant Peach. Yeah. That's what I'm talking about. And what are you getting? Sorry, you know, I'm sorry. Sorry, dude.

What are you going? Don't go anywhere. I was adjusting in my chair. All right. What are you getting your girl for Valentine's Day? Dinner and flowers. Coming in a pan. What are you getting your showiner?

We're not doing anything. You're not? No. Why? Because I don't know. We just don't do it. We don't do anything. Are you still in seagulls? Are you still in seagulls?

Yeah. I asked him for flowers yesterday. I sent him a text. I was like, hey, will you send flowers to my work? And he was like, oh yeah, definitely. I wouldn't have thought of that. And I was like, okay, never mind. Who are you dating?

Ryan Hamilton? It's Seaton Smith. Oh, Seaton. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Why wouldn't you think of that, he seems like a nice guy? He is a nice guy. He just, we just don, Satan. Really? Yeah. Why wouldn't he think of that? He seems like a nice guy.

He's a nice guy. We just don't even like think about holiday. It's just fucking, yeah, I'm kidding. It's stupid. It's all the whole, everything. The fucking house, there's every holiday has candy associated with it. We're just fucking sheep.

We're morons, okay? If you're celebrating these stupid, fucking, fucking, we're morons. But nobody's following you. It's true. Shut up. I'm telling you right right now the fact that anybody spends extra money on Valentine's day You should just go to dinner once in a while. Look at your drinks. I'd say it's a company who cares It feels like doesn't feel genuine people are drinking on like valina or on New Year's Eve I'm like, why do you need to have a holiday to get drunk? We're adults who gives a fuck?

You want to get drunk a drunk one night? I don't know. Do you agree with that then? Yeah? I agree with you little chocolates. I think Valentine's day? I don't know. Do you agree with that, Dan? Yeah. I agree with you. I want those chocolates. I think Valentine's Day's gold. I don't know. It is. It's a stupid holiday. Well, if you don't, all right, then nobody gets chocolate. No, but I like those chocolates. I'm doing no sugar, so suck my fucking dick. Me too. Can I have this one?

Yeah. All right. Which one are you gonna take? Uh, I'm gonna have some. Why are you saying it like there's come in these chocolates? There is. These are actually no. I actually made them. I ate garbage all that caramel I got the right one I got come With your girlfriend two months two months

Yeah, you'll get there something I got our flowers you got flowers 1800 flowers Yeah, use my promo code You know, I do that. It's a shit Yeah, use my promo code I'm not like go crazy we lot we have one eight hundred hours on the network and then Bonnie boss trash them So they Was two years of trash, but he's like he kind of tasted to a little boy He's being sarcastic about the sponsors. I I'm like, Jay, you literally can't do that.

They don't fuck around with it. They're paying a lot of money to be on the coast. That's the case. Dish networks gonna be fearing. Right. We are gonna hear it from them. Listen, why that chocolate was good. That wasn't real good.

You just went to the office. You know what I, you know what I got as a sponsor? I got a Tushy, Bob. I'm trying what? A Tushy, Bade. Oh yeah, that's great. Fucking love it. I love the Bade.

They sent you a Bade. Yeah, they sent us free Bade's and they're our sponsor on the show. Now, did you get them? Yeah. You went and you wanted to, I love Lewis. We'll just find things that he needs

for his apartment and they'll get them to push. Oh, well, we have an ad sales guy that works for our network. Who does that sales for Rikus? We have people. No, we have two. Hello, hi. We have probably the same guy. We have two two guys, sir I'm offering you an opportunity I really a very big project at the ground level I would like to sell

You know what friend Very funny we do not talk sex We do not talk sex. We do not come fri come. Our last podcast we talked about who can come. One time we had manager, we joke off on television into cop. Yes, very. Wow, you're in the next hit is not good. I'm not Indian.

That was not Indian. That was a, that was a deaf guy. So you don't know poppy met them. Con volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca, espectacularismos, lincones de película y un sincín de aventuras desperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de Madrid, Amurcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea, Carifa sujeta a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. So anyways back to Jiz. Yeah, I don't I don't I don't I don't wait can I ask the ladies Rosemite how old are you?

I think you're older than I think because you look very well. A terrible sentence to say to old. Yeah, no, that's not that's actually a compliment. Oh, you're probably older than I think you are. 40.

That's not it. That's a compliment. Is it not? Hang on. She looked very, very young. Fucking it not hang on I'm very very young fucking boo coconut Do it do it do it do it You couldn't even follow through on that I didn't want the chocolate. It's crunchy. I don't like it's coconut I have herpes

I mean I was touching guardrails all over New York City I'm a way I do have warts. Hey, no She said like she's gonna fuck me someday. I'm so so I know that changes she goes that changes everything We're in our 30s. What's that mean nothing anyway? Listen to me. Listen to me. You're gonna do something to me today. All right. Yeah, I was gonna read your astrology I want it. I want it now you know you do this for a job. Why do you to me today, right? Yeah, I was gonna read your astrology. I want it, now you do this for a job. Why do you know this? I know this just because like when I was younger,

I didn't have a TV and I started reading all these astrology books. Okay. I just, I learned it like that. Bobby thought you were bringing Milky Way's. She did bring jobs, you brought them, but why did you brought a bunch of stuff? I did, I got a bunch of free shit from work

I mean I would have bought it. It's so sweet. Oh, thank you so much. Yeah, I mean it does take it away that it's from working It's free. Yeah, I don't know why I said closet before you got here All right, well, I guess really a show because I wanted to but I want to ask them about come all right Because you're on comment. I we're all right look. We're not I want to get off come so let's just answer the question We'll finish come let's say then do you want to get off-com so let's just answer the question We'll finish com let's come let's say then join it come down or What is what is your what is your final question 30 30? Okay, so you're a little bit you're from my generation You're a little bit younger though, okay, so X-gen

I love and Lewis gets into his MMA tone. Are you guys a little bit of, so therefore, if I use big words and senses, I sound smarter than I actually am. Generationaly, generally. Generally, come is salty. Yes. I mean, am I wrong in saying these? Their husband occured towards a sweeter, younger family. That's not an MMA list.

You're really accurate. No, MMA Lewis is like, all right, so gross, let me talk to you about your com for just one second, okay? What is the thing you say? First time you tried com, tell me about it right now in detail. That's MMA. I don't remember the first time I tried it, but I can tell you about like the last time I did it.

No, I back it up. First experience, com shooting at your face, okay, no, all right, no, I know that's not really what I want to know. What I actually want to know is you can't, you stop using your hand. I can't stop, I can't, I can't stop looking under your arm, it's just wiggling. I think somebody else behind you fucking with you.

It's something that's going to be arm-abending. It's just a ghost. So listen, do you guys feel is come like on the face? It's like, I've dodged it. No, but I guys feel is come like on the face like I've dodged it No, but I'm saying is it almost like a very accepted thing because I feel I'm a little I'm older I think I heard ask a girl are you eating butter right now? Bobby wants some it's nicotine. Oh, okay. I thought you it looks like a little butterpack You get a little liability and a little lay in the lakes and a basket. Whenever she gets nervous, she has to,

she has to flop a couple butter sticks down her head. My fingers. Sorry, it's better than methadone. She used to be a fatty. I just eat and just eat landalax. I used to be a fatty. I used to be a fatty. Now you have butter.

Now I just have to always be a fat. You need a butter pad under your tongue when you get nervous. Yeah. All right, so he wants to know, is there like, is it almost like an accepted thing that a guy's gonna pull out and come on your face? Because I feel very weird doing that to women now,

but I feel like younger girls are like, yeah, that's just part of the game. Hey, hey. When you're younger, I think it's part of the game. When you're older, you're like, okay, this was something we should have agreed on. Well, not, I'm not, here's, when you're older, yeah, it's like,

buying a call. You're like, say, I'm into that. We should have discussed this first. Yeah. Okay, now when's the point where you're older, yeah, it's like buying a call. You're like, say, I'm into that. We should have discussed this first. Yeah. Now, when's the point where you're like, just put it in my mouth. When's the point? Yeah, when you just, when a guy goes,

what do you want it? You go anywhere you want. That wasn't a question though. No, but it kind of is, where do you want it in the toilet bowl? Get away from it. Yeah, basically. So you don't like it at all.

No. Lauren? What? Lauren Ruff's comment basically. So you don't like it at all. No. Lauren? What? Lauren Rubscombs. I have first hand. That was her nickname. No, no, no. She has a jacket with that written on it.

It's never been the name. With the names of God, she sucked off on the sleeves. Like a starter jacket. Yeah. It's the name. Put it on there. It's like a club. Yeah, she has a medal like the Marines.

She has a cast with all the fucking guys. She's the admiral. Lauren. She's decorated. She got done a bus. The whole bus goes to attention. She has the medal of honor. She walks back to this as a seat. Nobody sitting in it. Some hassle with a no pad. All right, listen. Lauren. I've and he's followed no, we wonder how many purple hearts you have How many white hearts of you a lot? So you swallowed a lot so what a guy's gonna come if he goes waiting wanted to put it do you have do you say? But stomach or I'll swallow whoa wait a minute

I don't know if she's a but stomach or all swallow. Wait a minute. What a fuck. What a minute. I'm in the butt. But it's not even. No. I don't know what was on the table. I love that she recited it like it's the boy scout motto.

She has a butt stomach or all swallow. Well, but stomach or all swallow. I'm marching to a storm. She has a laminated piece of paper and a basement, but stomach or swallow that's the name She has a piece of paper that's folded up in it for years and she opens it up but It's like what you're talking about that thing right? I was gonna say I'm gonna say you know you're picking that mango shoot I'm gonna say what is it but where she just points to it on the side of the wall where he's like what do you want me to finish she goes?

Don't it. Yeah, no, it's like her no shoes no service It's at a front block three-row song. It got. Boom. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's like a like a star was close with your when he comes in your eyebrow and then you're one of your eyebrows is going like the terminus like terminator one. Did you get it?

I think it's second. All right, listen, listen, sweetie. No, it's not weird. I mean, it's life. It's life. I think stomach is the least is the most convenient. Convenient, because you wipe it right up. Oh, just pull out and come on the tummy.

Yeah, yeah. Come to no swap, but you always try to shoot it up at her chin. Swallow, I don't like it. I feel like it's impossible to not hit Lauren's chin. I don't like coming in. I don't like a girl. I don't want a girl to swallow. Why?

Because I don't. Do you make her, do you make her open opener mouth like a dog when he's chewing on something and you grab the sides and go, no, drop it. Drop it. Drop it. Drop it. Drop it. Drop it.

And then I go like this. I go like this for next. You go, stop it. What do you have in your mouth? I have just, just the silver comes in. Up. Up. But I think, I think, I think, correct me from wrong.

I've talked to some girls that's holding, holding in their mouth and then spitting it out It's worse because you get it like in your teeth and like really just swallow it just once it's in just fucking take it back Yeah, like whiskey You're not gonna fucking are swirling around Yagerie's I mean Some girls do though if you watch if you watch a porn It is kind of sexy and a porn with it because they don't want to swallow because of the aids So they kind of swish it around in their mouth.

No. You think they swallow it? It's kill the AIDS. I think swish it on your mouth. It does. Yes it does. Yes it does. It does.

I will swish eating your mouth. How much do I want to make a plate? I was right now. Twin L's right now because the reason you're- I'm just gonna make acid kill the AIDS. No, cuz you're fucking sick. I'm sick of AIDS. I know.

I'm HIV positive. I know you. I would. That's why you lose and win every positive. I know you are with them. That's why you lose and win your arms swirling and around in your mouth. He has AIDS. People get cuts in their mouth. They bite their lip.

They bite their tongue. They're going to go on goal come. Hey, they get like gums like the you get it about absolutely, but they don't swallow back. It's you know, they don't swallow the juice anymore. They keep it in their mouth and then they spit it back on the day. dead stomach acid kill aids It is a common myth that giving oral sex is low risk due to stomach acids being able to kill the virus what people tend to

The reason of the common methods because it's a hundred percent true good anyway Continue this story. Oh my god. He talks like I literally start to I'm like maybe I'm Maybe I'm dumb maybe common sense doesn't play to everyone knows I'm like maybe I'm dumb maybe common sense doesn't play everyone knows you can't You're so gravely it sounds like you like been no he screams at you and you feel you're on a bus in the projects Come is a liquid what breaks down liquids Obviously Obviously It's broken down. It's a rusty penny and swallowed it and it came out clean because of the stomach acid and then it turns the aides into gas What you burp out. Yeah, and you can use to light lighters So the only way you can get aides for sucking dick is if you swallow and then blow your aides burp

Lewis has been wrong twice on this podcast you've also been wrong once. No, not at all at all I haven't been wrong once has he been wrong twice no twice. Where did God you been wrong twice? You've been wrong once you been wrong wrong Bro when I'm on set I'm wrong I'm Doc, that's a lot of wrong. Billion. Bro, when I'm on set, I'm wrong all the time. I'm not here. When I'm sitting on that chair with my name on it.

I don't know, I'm looking over at Damien Lewis. I'm like, bro, am I wrong? He's like, bro, wrong, Doc. Yeah. I tell you, I want to say this real quick. Season one's out now. Season one. Season one, I binge watched this fucking show.

And I was like, I'm going to watch it. I didn't even know you were really in it. Okay, all of a sudden, this cocksucker comes in it you are fucking phenomenal because I don't know what you I forgot by the end of the season that it was you I was just enjoying the character thank you and the show is fucking great yeah this season's really good if you like season one season two I mean it because I am corporate Dan, but I'm also You corporate Dan, but I'm also a little honest right now. Here's the deal. I'm also artist Dan. Here's a deal with the show

You ready and artist dances season two pretty goddamn great. Here's a deal with the show Not everybody's bad and not everybody's good on me. I'm good all the time You're gonna do some stupid shit. I got you. get y'all done. So here's a deal That show if you haven't seen billions you gotta go fucking check it out February 19th on showtime Have you seen them every Sunday? I just fast forward so I see Dan's head and then I play then I fast forward I'm time to fucking take on a new show in my life. All right, can I I want you know, I want I was good as game of Thrones Yeah I'm like on a new show in my life. All right. Can I, I wanna, you know, I want, is it as good as Game of Thrones? Yeah. Nothing.

This is a game of Thrones. What the fuck up, Bruce? I go, yeah, it's, if, if, if, you can't remember the names of the characters, it's not worth watching. I get, get it, test me, I know them all. All right, good. The name of the dragons.

The dragons? Three of them. Fuckface, cocksucker, and Tittitts. Tittitts, Tittitts, big, big, fire, what was the name of her husband? Josh, Josh, I got it. uh... fuckface cocksucker and pittitts titts cindy fight uh... just i got it

got a hell of a what was the name of his tribe uh... the fucking terth raki what was the name of her her gungardin the guy the the the guy the gungardin the guy that was with her is that the end word in game of thrones

gungardin gungardin gungardin gungardin what was the name of the gungardins what was the name of the guy that was with her and word of game of phones What was the name of the guy what's your face is a gunga then is Watch Type it up and then you'll say just pick up do image actually is a really Actually, it's a really, it's an intern on a podcast. Dude. That's a gonga dinner, I say. He's a little man-serving. A gonga dinner. The nearest Targaryen.

Yeah, what was the white guy's name? The white guy that was with her, that was helping her. After he died, he, yeah, the night. Oh, gonga dinner. Nah. Hey, Lewis, do me a favor, because I forgot my glasses. Is what you're reading? Yeah, you're a good reader.

Oh, give me a MMA voice, Lewis. Oh, shit, time to pay some bills here on the YKWDU podcast. Bum, bum, boom, boom, boom, ping, ping. Whether you're a bona fide golf officiano, or you just live for the thrill of fantasy sports, you're gonna love playing one week fantasy golf at draftkings.com. We're going to win your share of hundreds of thousands of dollars in total prizes, bananas. Draftkings is the destination for one week fantasy sports and playing one week fantasy golf

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that I'm going to come back. I'm basically going to say mom and dad coming back. We've got we've been watching commercials, right? And we'd say, all right, well, I bet on candy bar. You bet on movie, right? And whatever will come up first, we would lose our fucking minds. We would be, I bet you a Lollipop mom comes home with a black eye.

Oh, Jesus. Oh, she never came home. That counts. Oh, push to tomorrow. She never, you pick six golfers before the tournament. She was off Thursday morning. Then just sit back and follow the action live. Else by the competition and get paid, motherfuckers.

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golf any sport because they they cover all sports Yeah, I mean MMA how great is that? MMA is already the most exciting sport in the world and then you throw an element of Dambling now holy shit fucking great. So go there right now draft Kings dot. Hey, I want to say this two things I want to talk about I want you to do this thing for me and then I want to talk about McGregor McGregor. McGregor? His cousin? No.

Vito McGregor. They just announced that Mayweather McGregor's on. No, they did it. The fuck up. What? I know McGregor, Mayweather just said it's close. It's done. He said it's done.

Creeps with kids. We're doing another creeps with kids March 16th. I'm on it. No, you're not. You can be on the next one. You're on the last one. The first one I killed it. Yeah, you did great. Creeps with kids. It is up now on comedyseller.com. Get your tickets. It's selling quick. The show's amazing. We have Jessica Kirsten. We have Kevin Brennan's on the show. Rich Voss's on the show.

Who else? We got one more. Who else is on the show? Can you go to the website real quick, Jess? No, big jizz is gonna be on the next. We couldn't do it, I saw my day. I think, let me Chris D couldn't do it. Who else on the show?

Vibola Green. March, verbal agreements. March 16th at the village underground. Go to ComedyCellar.com creeps with kid Ron Bennington and Gail are hosting again. What a what a fucking win that a great show. Yeah Ron and Ron is just been doing stand-up again. He's the best fucking he's a monster. Yeah he's gonna fucking he's a monster. He really is. You got it. It's you boss Jessica Kiersten. Ron Gail

Bennington and Kevin Brennan. Is that it? There's one more person. No, it's up. That's it Okay, yeah, there you go. Um great show March 16th get you tickets now What else? Okay, so we're gonna do this thing right now. So what is it? What does this do? So astrology it's just like if you want to know what's wrong with you or if you want to know like more about yourself It's kind of like I know it's wrong with me. I can't put down a carb right or a fucking sugar. I am going guys I'm I'm in fucking troubleville. I can't get back from September to December. I was nailing it. Have you gained weight? Yeah, Bob you know already do you been there? It's a man. I know I know, but I can't I'm such I'm so stressed out right now I have so much anxiety

And it's good anxiety. It's good stuff, but it's still anxiety. Yeah, no, it's just Eating then you put on layers and layers and the night. I just gave this something in my head that I went You know what fuck it. Let's go I think deep-town I think deep-town that's why people get fat Rose, both sides. Sorry. What? It's hibernation season. Yeah, clearly you need to learn a lot to burn You just you just add on layers and then nothing can harm you Bob, come and to February you're going to your great

Sumber. Did I shot a way back with a crossbow? It's bugging out. Listen, when you crawl out in April, you will be slender. Listen, your body is not, listen, here's why I'm eating. Because I'm stressed, I have anxiety, I have fear, I have doubt, I have insecurity. That's everything I do said. Right, and when I eat something, and it makes me feel good, it's a reward,

and it's all so bad, it It does two things because I'm a fucking creep. So I like that it's bad. Yeah. Like a hooker or massage, which I can't do. You do massage, Paul. Don't wouldn't understand a rub and tug. But if she did, I'm not talking about it on the show. Okay. I'm not a moron. Flat Bill Bobby might not play by the rules, but he does have a couple. I've serious, I've been so fucking on the edge lately. I've been trying to stay away from people. I feel bad. I snapped the Keith to I fucking lost my mind on the fucking tubby asshole. He owes me $100. Does he really? He bet me the cowboys were doing the super boy idiot. I made a bet too with somebody. Who won the Superboy this year?

I was talking to my friend Robert Kraft yesterday. Oh fuck. I was a little thing called the New England Patriot No shit. You will become best friends with that asshole. I'll see you in a box. Nope Niners till I die Anyways, I Oh, anyways, I was drunk gold. That's one of these things before the ice. I was in a, I was driving to Boston to do this gig and I left late at night, the snowstorm day. And I got an hour and a half out.

I pulled in to get, I was gonna get a chicken sandwich. Just chicken, chicken, sandwich, that's it. No fries or nothing. You're drinking syrup out of a machine. It's just jacking off covered in fuckers. I really can't even need the salad, it's just a syrup. Turn it on. Covered in sprinkles, just jack it off. Oh, the machine's going. It's good.

It's bad. I walked in to get a pack of gum. I'm looking to get some sunflower seeds. I'm looking to get some sunflower seeds. I'm looking to get some sunflower seeds I'm gonna call we're gonna call it is the rain breath strips I gotta put your I gotta put your

I call you on the YKW. Who's this? Who's this? Did I hear you say you saw you smacked at me? It's keeping it. I was a kid. Yeah, buddy. I'm sorry buddy You know so funny. I thought you met Keith Robinson. I thought you'd be like, oh god damn it Bobby. I'm mad Just snap that me don't talk about Keith sweat. I keep what? Keith sweat remember him. Where is that damn bandana? I can't get it. It's down your luck. I can't Too fat to get the band in it's on the ground. Yeah, I'm sorry buddy I have I have a show on you call them a liar on his own show you call me up on my own show and turn on me Did you work that that's why you turned on me and you were wrong and you were wrong

I should get into apology from you come to think of it. I I actually googled it and there's a Harvard study on exactly what we were talking about that says you were wrong You just you'd lose go amazing me you just use the word Harvard you thinking I'm gonna go. Oh, yeah This guy really took fucking fucking self, you know what fuck you and fuck your uncle Fucking cocksucker I take it all back you motherfucker Cocksucker Good place Fuckin' cock suck up. I was right. I was fucking right. We had a better good place. Fucking Reese's.

No, body no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Bobby Ethan my cum. I like Reese's on my asshole my belly. I listen. Anyways, yeah, I was in the parking lot. I go, okay, I go to get my wallet. I forgot my wallet at my house. I was, it was me in one of those huge rest stop parking lot. I'm in the middle of it in my car screaming. Oh, and you fucking dumb fuck.

What the fuck is wrong? It's 11, 3, 12 at night. I gotta either drive all the way to fuck home. And then all the way to fuck back, I'm going, why? Why? What's screaming? Because then you don't have to think about

what you're about to do. So fucking, I'm screaming. What could could you do that what's the other? I call my wife this white this way my wife is the fucking I call her up She's like what's wrong? I go that fucking wallet. She goes it's okay. How the fuck is it? Okay? I'm in the middle of shaking common hair out of the I and herred of the toilet right now. Give me a few minutes. I'm really gonna look for your wallet after I get past this fucking cum cobra. I got a fucking drain. I got a toilet rancher there coming out of the house.

So she goes, it's gonna be fine. She goes, I'm screaming. I'm literally fucking losing my shit because I'm an asshole. I go, she goes, do you have your phone? Do you have your mobile app on your phone? I go, yes. She goes, you can get gas. She goes, do you have your phone? Do you have your mobile app on your phone? I go, yes. She goes, you can get gas.

She goes, do you have your Apple Pay on your phone? Your credit? Yes. Okay. There's certain stores, a lot of stores use Apple Pay. So you can get food that way. She goes, I'm gonna call the hotel. You'll be able to check in without your ID.

Alex, my end of the tone. You'll be fine. Go to the hotel. And I was like, okay. No. And then I had a 10 hidden in my car like I always do and I got that fucking double quarter pounded with cheese Cuz you were locked out instead of getting large fry Yeah, and I I'm sweet and I see okay come on

Go away kids get a real get a coke Right I'm sitting there in this fucking thing, and I just, I gotta stop. So it's, yes, I- That's not that bad though. I mean, I thought you were gonna be looking at me. It's not that bad. Have you seen what I looked like before?

I mean, that's what I'm saying. Looking at you, I just figured it would be more. Did you, you know what it's fucked up? Because I'm too weak. I'm three weeks back on the diet now, right? Yeah. Here's this fucking me up. You know what they just started doing?

Cause I love McDonald's. I really, I'll always love McDonald's in a weird way, right? And. Here's this fucking me up. You know what they just started doing? Because I love McDonald's. I really, I always love McDonald's in a weird way, right? And I hate it, but I love it. They just started it. They let you choose the fucking size of the Big Mac. So you could do a fucking one level Big Mac, two level Big Mac, or three level Big Mac. And it's no good, because on the way home, I stopped again.

And that sandwich thanks too much. What? Three? The three level. Yeah, but it's just singles. You get a fucking, well, you get a bigger burger now on the big Mac. I just do that shit.

Here's what I would do. I get the Mac sauce on a fucking cheeseburger. No. I invented this shit years ago, okay? You get the Mac sauce on the cheeseburger. Yeah, that's it. Yeah, that's it. Yeah, that's it.

I was gonna say bath houses, A6, yes. I'm having just burgers, no one. I went and said, hey, why. Yes. I'm having just food. Yes. No one. I went and said, hey, why can't I have that sauce on this sauce? Because I love this. I invented come crepes. And a cottage I was running in Albany. Do you know the crevices of white castle?

I have a dig come case. Did you also know that there's more electrolytes in a tablespoon of come than in a 32 ounce gatorade? Hey, listen, so I never get to hydrated because I drink just a tablespoon of comatet Wow We really left them out there. Yeah, it's cool They should have said when I'm out there with my voices dog. Listen. I'm not alone. So when I eat this when I eat like this I'm fucked. I'm in the mix. I'm in the mix

I'm in the the depths of this the grips of this You're trying to say miss are you you're looking at me like you're asking if that's a astrology related I'm saying how are you gonna the stars change my diet How does fucking Orion help me Bout doesn't fit A Pokemon you hold it I'm a fit. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon.

I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon.

I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon.

I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. I'm a Pokemon. wanna get into this. Let's do this. What do you got? What do you got? Do you got cards? You got an app? No, I don't have cards or anything. I looked up your chart earlier. So like, she gave me the time you were born and all that stuff. So I looked up everything.

And so you're a Libra, right? Yes, you're a Libra. But your moon, which is like who you are on the inside when no one else is around, is, that's in Capricorn, which means that you're supposed to be disciplined with yourself. I am disciplined. For what I'm disciplined, but here's the thing, I'm an addict.

So I'm disciplined with the job I have to do right now, and my responsibilities to my family and to my job. Yeah, but you're blowing all my stuff that I was going to say. Nice talking to you, go ahead. All right, so. Thanks, baby. I'm psychic. So basically, also it says here in your chart that you're going to run over all my explanations on a whole night.

It says you're likely to. I can't feel my leg. I wrote it out. So it says you're all. I don't like die right now, and that's not in the chat. And she's wrong. She's not a tummy too. She's not.

It's not a. It's not a tarot carburet. Yeah, you think you're talking to a psychic right now? I don't know. I'm just trying to fucking mix things up. Do you know what you're going to want? She knows magic. I hate to interject right now, but you got your dark arts

confused. She's only doing part of the devil. But I try to speak to an old love one that don't have it. I don't like that you got me revved up with Keith again. I feel bad now again. You got me revved up. Now he got you revved up with Keith again. I feel bad now again. You got me revved up. Now, he got you revved up. You did.

Well, he started with you and then we came into rub it in as he accepted your apology rubbing it in you being wrong again. I'm with you 100%. He got you all right. I think he called you just to wait for that apology. I think that's probably what pissed you off. You said you were going to apologize and then he calls. He was like, yeah, he was a right pop.

Yeah. Great tattoo artist artist. So I can't ask. So I'm great. Just fine. He's such a fucking cock. Fuck. He did this one. Huh? Let me say this one. That's all right. It's a nice tattoo. It's nice. I mean, I seem better. No kidding. That's nice. Beautiful. He's beautiful. He's insane. He's insane. He's in Shane artist. All right. So this is what it says. It says you're all from a friend. You're all from most golden life, both consciously and unconfidently.

Are you shaking? We have confidence. Am I shaking? No, you're not. I'm kidding. No, she's getting into her fucking. Like, I mean, the answer to that. You're talking about the moon. She's turning into Odomé Brown right now. Oh, no, no, no. Oh, no, no, dead. Oh, damn.

Oh, yo, God. I want to speak to Rosebud. I want to speak to Bobby's grandmother. She is no longer me. Right, but she's sexting her. I'm sorry, I'm not speaking in time. Oh, God. Give me Kit Katz.

Ah, I hurt my stomach. I'm both of them. Oh, God. All right, your uppermost goal in life is to attain security. Yep, that's true. In love, you tend to be very close to your partner, but you're probably, you probably

find it hard to share her. I see the queen size, babe. I'm not a fucking weirdo, like big J. Come hold on. This way it says though. It says, I wanna fuck my girl. It says jealousy on your part can make her feel restricted.

Well, that's, can I stop you right there? I've never been a jealous guy. I actually jerk off to cuckl porn. So go figure. But as I this last year, I gained weight a little bit and my wife has been the same since I've known she's the same smoking. And then I did get a little jealous this year.

I pulled it all back though. That's a week to see your dick. That's good. That was not good, that was great. That was great. What feeling I watched like a deep three-pointer where I go. What is that really responsible shoot about that deep? Well, his smile on his face. You know, when you can see, when you can see two of his dead teeth.

Go ahead. Two of his dead teeth. Um, you put work before pleasure. You tend to ignore any emotional needs you have that seem childish or illogical to you. You're telling me, sister. Is that true? What is it? What did you say?

It says you put work before pleasure. You tend to ignore emotional needs that you have that seem illogical or childish to you. Like give me an example. So like if let's say you have a feeling that comes from something and it doesn't make sense to you yet, like logically it doesn't make sense, which feelings often don't, you won't express it just because it logically

doesn't make sense yet. So a lot of times people will feel something and then they'll just say it, you know? And you'll hold it back and not say anything and then and then it you know, probably you crying? No, I'm trying to understand what you're saying. Okay, I get agree with that. I mean, that's not, I mean, yeah. So there was a lot of words that just confused you. You're agreeing only because you want to understand. Do you understand? I feel like I'm watching an episode of the first 48 where they just trick like a

Deeper no, I was not I was not I was just didn't understand what you just say Bobby slowly turning into Brendan desi where they're like did you kill her? I did yeah, yeah, yeah, I grab her hair. I just want to go to my You didn't grab her hair that I punched her in the face. No, you killed her, you burned her body in the back. Yeah. And then you ate her. I don't know. Did you do that?

Are you born on a high moon? You go, yeah. I don't know. Then he goes, can I go home now? I got a six period. I got to make it by six period. I'm going to test. I'm going to fail. That's the best show. All right, so it says you have a powerful need to feel worthwhile

in the real world like with material security and technology. Yeah, you're like, Bob, you're like, just as phone, that's as, that's as binky. Yeah yeah that's him pretending right now that he's there's even care but he cares let's go into his big here's me look how much he cares if this was a cloth blanket right now and he was rubbing it you would see that your analysis is working this is your pink is that he tried to show you that his word about it took up to his phone oh it's telling me I have to drink sorry oh cool is that yourppy cup? You got your sippy cup that goes in your binky? It's just hooked up to you. Tell me to drink my pinky. You know, you could just use your thirst

That was not as funny The word first pushed it open also still laughing that I'm calling it your binky You're laughing at your stuff still laughing that I'm calling it your binky. So you laughing at your stuff? Most of the time. You're laughing at this stuff, to be honest. It's really funny. He's good. All right. It says that perhaps more than anything you need to be respected by others,

like important people to feel secure. Starfucker. No, I, that's things I've worked on in the last few years with Alan, is that, you know, Starbit. No, you burdened people? Well, it's not about, it's not, it's not. Bobby has separate tables at his parties for levels of comedians, you know, way. It's like, it's broken into thirds. So there's like the low, low level table.

Yeah. Yeah. You didn't, don't, Dan bumped up. Oh, the other day, but you know, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm still, Dan will still go to the fucking open micro table and just do FaceTime. But you know, do you know why I'm having burgers with Victor Paulo and Colin Quinn, baby Hey, how did you get to the big boy table Bobby Kelly? No, how did you get there hard work in determination? This I Billions on this is how you got over there you walked over yeah

I put tables out and these insecure fucking idiots just sitting together. No, I'll tell you the one farthest away from when you first come in is the open-micro table. Open-micro and not comic table. So it'll be a mixture of like Bobby's neighbors and then like, scopo and people to learn. This clock second wants a round table

where everybody's equal. Then I don't have enough room. Then the second table is the table where it's got like, smash, and fuck it. No, we all sat together. No, we did. That is not true. The last party, the last party, everybody sat with everybody.

The last barbecue. That's because Schumer wasn't there. There was a real separation in Schumer. Well, that's not my fault, that's your fault. I don't tell anybody to sit anywhere. I put tables out. You see where you want. How fun of swimming so fun that was it's time until fucking asshole had to make it a competition and then ruined Dolores's flow the most fun we had

was that competition buddy you're fucking attaching the football competition under the water I know jumping into the thing in the water no how about how about fucking a Puerto Rican running naked down my block out of Dolores is back y'all God damn was I laughing so hard. That's the 78 I don't care about your close She let us use the pool on my neighbor Dolores who's like Max's grandma. She learned it. I love her I love her Buddy the other neighbors of home. They see him running out holding his junk

What are we gonna do to you again? What are you gonna do me? Me and Jay are going to do something to you in your racing. You're going to rape him. And we had all those clothes, but we were making a run around. They took my clothes. It wasn't my fault. They took my clothes and then I had a run naked. No, I know. You didn't have to run.

Why don't you change inside weirdo? That's what happened. We caught him changing and we took his car. He won't. He wouldn't change inside. He wanted to change outside. He's a savage. He's an outdoor cat.

Yeah, he's a fucking, he's a mere cat. Outdoor cat. Mirror. Outdoor. Mirror. Mirror cat fingers. Oh wow. Okay, so go ahead.

All right, so. Can you do a cat cat and slow the cat voices? I mean, do you have anything good? I mean, this is, I mean, I just want the therapy already today. I got to deal with fucking me not being respected. Yeah, can you, you perky, that cock suck up. He's fucking I'm kidding. I'm stuck.

Could you prescribe, Adderall? Could I prescribe it as, as, as an astrologer? Sure, yeah, yeah. I actually have Adderall. I can sell it. Yeah, no, get the fuck away. Get away. No, you know, what is Adderall?

You don't have Adderall. What is it? You can't do it. I have the better stuff. What do it? You can't do it. I have the better stuff. What do you have? I mean, more of Jesus Christ, you just fucking Jersey horror. The brain, the brain.

Hey, can I crush it? No, Adderall is crazy. The brain drug. Oh, the new brain drug. You got it? I got it. What brain drug? It's type it up.

Brain drug. No, it's them. It's the new, it's like they're calling it like the news. It's close. It's not close to the, Limitless was a fantasy buddy. I'm in on it Can you not jump out of the fucking gag on Dan right in the middle of it because you get nervous? Why am I doing this yeah, are talking about op to mind no? It's a brain drug There's a lot of you take it and you don't know what what you want me to do read a couple off fuck face

Probably read the body get a fucking read one and then go ahead a lot of them. You take it and you don't know what's the... What do you want me to do? Read a couple of fucks face. Bobby, you read the fuck. Why do you get a fucking read one and then go, Hey, there's a lot of them. I know there's a lot of them. Fucking research. But if it's a real brain drug, you would remember the name of it. True.

Yes, but no, because he's right. There's a lot of them. Or you're the worst pharmacist ever. No, there's a real one that just came out that's like the new miracle fucking... Is it a real drug or is it just like an herbal solution? It's a real drug. It's a real drug. Just at the moment. You take it a real drug or is it just like an herbal solution? It's a real drug. It's a real drug.

Just at the moment. You take it and what it does is it super focuses you. You're brain just- What do you lose weight? No, you have not. It's not real. No, I don't take it. I don't take it.

I don't take it. I have it. So bring it in. For what? Cut it up, snort it. It's rock and roll baby. We see what the podcast can go. Oh my, I've ripped it, rip it.

I've ripped it. What is it? It's rock and roll baby, and see what the podcast can go. Oh my, rip it, rip it. What is it? It's right to fucking party, bro. Valentine's Day, it's great. She's seen the way Lauren lit up. This such a jersey girl thing. What? I mean, Jesus. What?

I don't know what. He mentioned having Adderall, and she's one. Yeah, you both did. Yeah, you guys, I have legitimate ADD. I'm going to see'm going to see a psychiatrist. What what do you want Adderall for? I don't reaction or not necessarily even want Adderall I I'm seeing a psychiatrist tonight though for what all my fucked up shit. So what are you? What are you gonna do with it? What do I do with it if I need medication? I'm gonna take medication What would you take so off the Lewis? I do I just love that my my fucking circus bear Lewis

Him and on Lewis and you're crazy like oh I'm an okay, that's dude I don't I change you from hammer fisting to the politely shaking I'm no longer a Puerto Rican rattlesnake on the Puerto Rican Helo monster. I move pretty slow, but my bite still venomous. Jesus, Lewis, go turn into EOR. No, buddy. I won't bite you if you don't bother me. I'm pleased to sleep me along. What if he took a drug and it really did just skyrocket him to fame and it focused him so much that he's well, that's what I'm saying. I have so many projects. I got a project now.

The motherfuckers are good. Well, you you see, I mean, I legitimately have like issues like paying attention. Yeah. You shadow box and just for my face. That's how I focus. And why would you when you're writing something with somebody you can write to.

I do right. Here we yeah. I read a lot. No, he write no, not saying that we don't write, but we don't write the same time. We don't write at the same time. So that's it. He just said you put your head. You said, I'll sit down for for 20 minutes then I'll sit on for 20 minutes and then we edit each other

Should I go back to any fucking correct just spelling? I know you smart actually correct most I know I know hands actually more I'm pretty dumb. I'm all voices. Yeah, then very then's very funny But he is fucking retarded right and you have smart and grammar and spelling I'm okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm Why are you paying them? I'm very good. Let's all do professional phone calls.

So if you had to do, what do I come for? What do you mean? A professional phone call. You want to go ahead to head with corporate team. I want to sit here. I bet you're on the radio. I'm ready. Here we go.

I'm going to be the business. And what am I calling for? What you're calling for, you're calling to, you want to talk to HR and you want to make sure you want to give away. Henry Rollins. You want to give away tickets to your show and you want to give it to the company.

And it's a comedy show, but it's rated our comedy show so you kind of have to dance around that. Okay. Is Dan going first or am I going first? You're going first. I want Dan to go first. Okay, Dan go first. Why don't you flip a coin like the Patriots.

Cool Mike Secureth. He's speaking. You're trying to find the person to talk to. This is heads. This is tails. Can you do it? You unwrap it? My mouth.

Tails. All right, you go first. You want me to go first? Yes. Do you have a ring? Idiot. How is I'm an idiot? You dropped the phone.

I would hung up on them right there. Fucking dumb dumb. I'm going to do a equipment you face. Why don't you go in this phone? You dropped the phone I would hung up on him right there fucking dumb dumb I'm gonna new equipment you face This phone cost me a lot you make it donation billions Cuz bro, we got equipment to buy at the bonfire Monday's one day six a.m. On sir Don't be ever gonna be at the end you guys are just all cons hi. Hello. Hey. How you doing? I'm well. How are you? Who am I speaking to my name is Michael? Hey Michael. What's going on my name is Dan Soder? Hi. Good. Hello. Hey, how you doing? I'm well.

How are you? Who am I speaking to? My name is Michael. Hey, Michael. What's going on? My name is Dan Soder. Yeah. How can I help you, Dan?

Hi. I'm going to be your own. I expected him to know who he was. No, I just said my name is Dan Soder. I just said my full name. I'm sorry for my roommate picking up a phone. Yeah. Where is my fucking bomb?

Oh, my God. Jesus Christ. Sorry. Michael, real quick. I'm so sorry about that. Yeah. Michael, listen. Jesus Christ. Sorry. Michael real quick. I'm so sorry about that. Yeah, we need to get you. Michael, listen.

I was just calling to let you guys know I'm going to be in the Sacramento area. We're at a toilet paper. I'm on the phone. I'm on the phone. When my door is shut, I'm on the phone. You godless fucking heathen. Okay. Maybe you should use all the fucking toilet paper. I'm on the phone! You godless fucking heathen! Okay! Hey! Maybe you should use all the fucking toilet paper!

Fuck! Fucking heathen! God damn, I'm so sorry about that. Where's the bun? Hey, how you doing, Michael? Dan Soder again. MTV 2, MTV 2's guy code. Yeah.

Listen, I'm sorry about that. I'm sorry about that. That's an island Mexican, I was recalled in New York, Puerto Ricans. Yeah, Dan, listen, I gotta, I think I'm gonna about that. That's an island Mexican or as we call them in New York Puerto Ricans. Yeah, Dan, listen, I think I'm gonna go now. Oh, totally, and I totally get why you would. But if I could just stop you, po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po-po Wait, Dan, did I call your phone? Dan, I'm trying to hold up pizza, what's going on here? I'll be right out, Lewis, just give me a second. Okay, I'm on.

Michael, it's Dan's here again. Are you okay? Yeah, I am so sorry about all that. Is there anything I can do for you? You sound really distraught. I am pretty upset right now. Are you okay? And can I call?

You want me to call the cops? I'm going to be a, I'm just going to be in the saccharin. Yes, I'm going to get a fever at the beach. I want you to be on the beach. Yeah, it's okay, I do. I'm 30. I'm gonna be a, I'm just gonna be in the saccharin. Yes. I think you have to February the orange one. Yeah, it's okay, 30. I took it to you in the orange. Yeah, whatever did actually. It's gonna take care of the ticket chart. There's still is a two-drink minimum.

Put him under the mic, hold on, then please. I'll take them all, okay? Thank you so much, Michael. And again, I really apologize about that. I'm sorry. I'll be straight away. No worries, I'll see you in seconds. I'm gonna get it.

I'm gonna pull the whole time, I get you. I'm done. I got those tickets off. You got them off. Yeah. Right at the end. You got them off. That was really good.

That was wonderful tri acting. That was wonderful tri acting. Beautiful work. Guns is still going. I'm a trained actor. That was fantastic. Now, if I was Lewis, I'd tap out. What, you think I can beat that?

I don't think so. I mean, that's think so That's God that's done that's literally You're just a podcasting God You're done have you're done that is on your mind. Let's walk away from the game You can't talking to nothing. That's nothing What nothing that's nothing he's talking into something that's not connected. You understand how mad he is. You understand how mad he makes you, he makes you dumber. Yeah.

You can't talk to nothing, that's nothing. Oh, nothing is tougher. That should be the end of YKWD. You should literally shut the lights off. That's the last episode ever. You can't leave. It's my fucking microphone going off. I feel bad about Keith again.

Sorry, shut up. He's gonna see the call back. You want me to do some chat? Yeah, let's go to chat real quick. Well, you know what? Yeah, go to chat real quick. Go ahead. Just a couple of things.

Panthers hockey says the only professional phone calls Lewis makes are to a correctional officer. It's pretty good. All right. All right. Why is Lewis, why is Lewis's head so much bigger than Deep Blue? Jacob T. Works says, give it seven years until Lewis and Bobby are fucking seven.

Seven, that's, yeah, you have to be in the room to feel this sexual chemistry. Seven hours. Fucking year and a half. All right. Drew F. L. says, Lewis's arms have earlobes. That was pretty good.

That was pretty good. Lewis is on the earlobes. That was pretty good. That was pretty good. Lewis is on the earlobes. Because I'm here as well. I'm gonna have some as an ear. Oh, I got it. He should've said earlobes. Lobes would have been far away.

I like earlobes. I like earlobes. I have armlobes. Well, that would have been funnier, I think. But we might not have got it. We might have lobes. Oh, yeah, but earlobes I get. I get printed on that.

I like earlobes. God. Raul Dela Cruz says. He really is like a flying squirrel. Oh, yeah, but earlobs I get I give credit on God Raul Dela Cruz says he really is like a flying squirrel man Raul Dela Cruz says we need to get Joe listen here for the trifecta true We try to get a man, but he's fucking good. He's all that with Louie all the time I made a talk about billions. He's like we should talk about yeah, that's that's private jet flow I was gonna do a new show, Joe. I was me on a bench with one other person, that's the show.

Would you be interested in that? He's like, very avant-garde. He's like, fucking genius, dude. I fucking love you. I mean, you're the bench. He's like, you mad at me? Are you mad at me? No, I'm not mad at you, Joe.

Joe, I'm not mad at you. I'm not mad at you. I'm not mad at you, are you mad at me? I'm not mad at you. Why are you means such a Jesus Cut. Fuck. I'm doing Lord Michaels is Louis. Yeah, I like it. I don't know Joe. I don't know. Joe. I'm gonna have your Performer. I can't believe they use any of your character's on billions straight up fucking soda. They should just make the whole show you like a

gentleman. Yeah, you're every character on billions. What else? What else you got there anything last one of his by sons of scotland he says bobby you're addicted to feeling sorry for yourself hey i think that's a good point you need to wake up some scotland what are you feeling tired for yourself i need tonight stop going to leave your wallet

go back and you get it and then you drive from the same night Big box. It's really A microphone I allow that yeah, I don't think I invited you on the show. I just did that to you What's your point Dan? I want to talk about funny. Yes. Yes. Yes We make everyone else look not as funny We're not funny. We're funny. We don't we get credit for buddy. Everybody's thinking that everybody's having a blast with Dan Nobody thinks that

He's too good Dan don't listen He's going over to stop you because you're hurting me. I want to learn and are fucking Fucking big old chin That's not nice. Hey, that's not a college guy. Oh, this fucking club. Oh, you're the shadows. She looks like the other physicals.

Big old shit. Have you looked at yourself in your mirror? Yeah, I'm here to make some of your jokes. I'm here for you, face. Lauren, back off. Lauren, back off. Let's listen. Sweetie, back off. I want to know a little bit.

All right, take it. Yes, she takes it on the chair. We know. Listen, let's put a blindfold on. She's hit her in the chair. I was reading the thing again. I like to hear it. The guy said that you're addicted to feeling sorry for yourself.

It's so funny that the other country is like Scotland and Ireland I would imagine. There's such tough little fucking assholes that the shit that we do bitch about. Like I'm literally my problem is that I have too much to eat. I can have whatever I want, whenever I want. I really have a little fucking pussy. I can't make a valid point. You got it. Bobby you have to go up. You have to flip your mental fucking switch You have to flip your mental switch and you know that you know when you know you know what the feeling is You know when you actually want to lose weight what happens? I lose weight you fucking you flip it and you go

I'm not even fucking anybody. I know you're not ready I but that's but that doesn't even deal with the problem True, I don't think we do like putting a bandaid on a broken arm, you know, like he did wait those challenge I know already doing the real ass wait a little challenge six six day challenge, baby What do you do to do that 15 pounds? 15 pounds man? I was it look like earlobes That's something you say when you're laughing and you're falling are you turning into a pig That's what I just imagine a Disney cartoon where Bobby just ate and sleeping on a stack of hay I'm going for a sleep study to more night

I'm going for a sleep study to more than I, by the way. You are a sleepover? I'm very excited. What are you doing? I'm going for a sleep study where you go in to see, you know, sleep api and all that, because my sinus is so fucked up from getting my nose broken when I was a kid so many times that I get these sinus infections just as dead punching them in the face over and over again. That's called a fucking Boston cold. that's called a fucking Boston cold. It's called a fucking Boston,

so the fucking Kelly Kiss. You get fucking cocked, cold cocked in the face by a fucking stepop. I just open up every morning, step up and fall. Oh, look, it's fucking, he goes like this, he goes, Allege season,

but it's not a smacked. It's a hoot. I have time for fucking morning fucking Boston Allege. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing.

I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing.

I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm freezing. I'm from England I moved to Boston And it's a very strange accent. I have now. It's kind of English and it's kind of Boston

I don't want to stop though. I was I grew up in Birmingham I grew up in Birmingham England and then I moved to Boston sounds like Louis sounds like one of those African guys that moves to England and then has the African and British. We call them Niggas. Whoa. Buddy. Come on. Come on. That's right.

Like yesterday month. No. That's right. What? That's right. Louis was a character. It was a racist British guy who lives in Boston. Yeah, but we don't-

And I hate black people in the industry. Disgusting creatures. I don't even care. This is why all this is why I want us all to come back in 20 years and find dumb Lewis in the creek basement Just doing race races characters with a bunch of chinks What's wrong with it with chinks and Jews out in the basement? Is hanging out with chinks and juice out in the basement Are you really gonna ship it doing is hanging out with chinks and juice?

You stop it. I don't your career is fucking you lining it up fire James does a documentary called what happened to my dad Yeah, it's just like a bunch of us and I'm like, I mean, he just started doing this character He's a British guy who lives in Boston. Yeah James racist even my low is gonna be the assholes should have shut his face. Yeah, I don't know. We both did the wrong British accent. Yeah. Um, what's up?

Are you scratching your head or raising your hand? He's indian. He's itchy. Easy. He just worked for that like a cop. He's a fucking guy. But you just worked for that like he was like a cop. Like what do you do it?

All right. How do you do it? Hands up. I try to pay attention to the deep pool because he has some stuff sometimes. I and wave you down like hey, we got a phone call yeah, I got you Anyways, all right. Well, thank you for reading. I don't know what you made me feel like shit. What what was the good stuff? Get to it get to it. Go ahead I'm yelling at you You're best 300 pounds

Yeah, you bet 300 pounds. Amazing. That's great. You're very much. You just have a knack for handling a wide variety of tasks that wants an agency to take on. Perhaps too much at the same time. You went positive, then you went negative again. I know.

OK. But you derive plenty of energy from the things that you do in your work and your hobbies and the things that you take on. You're like your perfectionist. OK. Vinnie Gianning. So you do like. So yeah, he lives in the boom docks. You know how it is to make him yon. I don't remember the last time I did one of those. You find tinfoil exciting.

You wanted the good shit. I wish people always have their whole rate at 90% capacity. Well, you you wanted the good shit. Yeah. Good shit. All right. Well, that makes people fall asleep. Okay. No, it doesn't. I want good more good shit. Like wanted the good shit. Yeah, good shit. All right. Well, that makes people fall asleep. Okay, no It doesn't I want good more good shit like good good shit. Okay, basically it just says that you're gonna be that you're very productive And you're gonna do a lot of good work because that's how you value that's my problem with like this one I read like the the you know in the newspaper the fuck horse go for a spot, right and I read the I read the witch doctor in the I read the I read the witch doctor in the back. The man who bring it.

I got a real checkup. I got a problem with the newspaper. There's so much words before the cartoons. The man who tells the future in the back. You're gonna say it's too general, right? You can make it that fits everybody here in the world. I will get you read my horoscope then. I'm I'll tell you what.

I'll read the horoscope today. And you pick a random one. It'll fuck you can make it. Horoscope is. We're gonna pick a random one. It'll fuck you. You can make it. Horoscope are different than your, then like, uh, same shit. That's all the same shit. No, it's not.

It's different. Please put a curse on Lewis. She's not. No, what's up? Reading your chart. Who would I mean, thinner? Reading your chart basically describes like who you are, like your personality.

Reading your horoscopes is about like, uh, like predicting your future, which is up to you, ultimately. Hey, look. And it's up to you. To make you work so much better. To you. Is it made up song? Yeah. Yeah. To make your work so good. Yeah, it's up to you. To make your life so better. Because it's up to you. To make life seem better. Everyone tomorrow, you see it donut on the counter. Bobby Kelly, you gotta say no.

Because it's up to you to make it life seem better. Up to you to make it all seem good. When you see that salad, everyone is saying no, no. Take that fork and stick it in and then eat that down ho ho cuz it's up to you to make it up some better cuz it's up to you. Look at my skin crawl. I love it. I'm here the best one I've had.

Get it with peanut butter. You can have some fun snacks while you're at it. All men's with a lightly salted up to you. Yeah. That's my friend. The Bobby Kelly inspiration on the hell. Fuck you, darling. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Ah, that's sick. That's sick. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. That fucking stinks. It's so bad, but so good. That made my day. It's gonna be my head. I'm gonna be singing that to myself tonight

Can somebody that knows music create a music actually that song I know there's a fan that can do that All right, here we go here we go. I want to get into this Conor McGregor and Mayweather mayweather cool no to McGregur. Oh God, please. Why did you hurt? He tried to make his lip Irish. He's just doing a face. Corn or Magrugur. That's Scottish.

He's a good. That's Russian. He's so good to fight. He's so good to fight. I like that. Oh, Corn or Magrugur. Corn or Magrugur. Why did you hurt?

He tried to make his lip Irish. He's just doing a face. Corn or Magrugur. That's Scottish. He's a good. That's Russian. That's Russian. He's so good to fight. He's so good to fighting. I like that. I like that.

Oh, I want to look at it. Go to the fighting. You can do samurai. Upside. Samurai. Who the hell? Old lazy samurai. Little time I should.

Okay. Cossets. Up to you. To make a world seem better. Cossets. Up to you you to make it world seem better cuz it's up to you to make the world seem pride All right, so listen here's the deal. What do you think about this? Do you think it's gonna be worthwhile? Do you think it's bullshit? Is it a scam? I think Conomer Grigorgetor get taken apart. I have inside information. Okay, please I think I need the inside of just destroy Okay, do you know what we're talking about? Yeah, okay, I want to fill you in every and I love Conor McGregor as an MMA fight

McGregor won his last fight right? Yeah, yeah, one light with 10 He won the second title. Yes. No second round knockout second round knockout TKL Yeah, but he fucking worked it me. He dropped him four times in the first round I not go TKO. Yeah, but he fucking worked it. He dropped him four times in the first round. He outclassed. I want to give you my point of view. And I'm the least, I know the least. I'm a big fan, but I will say. That's not true.

I think you probably know the second most in the room. I know this third least. Second least. I know the most. So here's the deal. I think Conor McGregor, if they legitimately fight, if this is not some boxing, horse, get rich quick fucking scheme idiot. Right?

They're gonna box, they're not gonna. But I know, I know, I know they're gonna box, but I'm saying if it's not some fixed horseshit that boxing does sometimes, I think, I think if they go in there and fight, that yes, may weather will come in and be fast as shit, but if McGregor hits him with that left, he's going out. He's going the fuck out.

Because McGregor, his power in that left hand blows anybody away that fucking Mayweather's fought. Before he mayweather's fought in some punchers. I think punchers hit him. That you just can't hit him. The way he rolls his shoulder, the way he defends himself. I saw paint that you want to take it. Are you saying that Connomerer is going to knock out for me, weather?

I said that if he hits him with a lot, if he can get, if he can get it, but he's probably not. He's going to dance around. No, no, no, no, he's going to dance around. Let me explain to you something. Okay. No, you do not condescending. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Let me explain to you something. Okay. Okay. Look, you do a not condescending. Can I?

Can I? Can you not mean you say ridiculous thing like that? Well, ridiculous. What? Ridiculous. I with the hands. Two one more time. Ridiculous.

One more, hand gesture. So listen, man. Just original. Go original. Floyd Mayweather is the best thing to do. Floyd Mayweather is the best boxer in the world ever. Okay. Conor McGregor is an unbelievable fighter. But Floyd Mayweather will make Conor McGregor look like he's never boxed before. Yup. Conor won't touch him. He won't come close to touching him. Floyd will toy with him. He'll tease him. He'll fuck with him. Floyd

makes people that have boxed the whole lives that are undefeated look like children when they're in there. Okay. McGregor has zero chance to beat them in a box and fight zero. This is a money play. Simple as this. It's a money play. They're both going to make 10 or I'm sorry, McGregor is going to make 20, 30 million dollars.

Floyd is going to make whatever is going to make 100 million. Here's the deal. I've heard very close to the scene. There's a few things behind the scenes that are going on. Okay. Number one, there's a law. This is MMA Lewis, by the way. Yeah. There's a law that states that promoters can't block.

It's a boxing law. It's like an old school boxing law that promoters can't stop boxers from competing in boxing. I forget the name of the law. Yeah, this was a couple of months ago they brought this up. Yeah, they were bringing this up. So, Dana said if you wanted to block, so it would be a problem. So here's the thing, the UFC can either play house or they can get a cord cordon junction for Connoble Gregory to go and box him without the UFC playing ball. And then the UFC loses the opportunity to make money. My understanding is the UFC is

saying, fuck it, we're going to make a cashrab. Why not co-promote this with Floyd Mayweather and Connoble Gregory as his boxing license in California now. Yeah, there are to be I've heard that this is very real. Right. The rumors that are coming out saying that they have a verbal agreement, very real. I have it. I'm 90% sure that this fight is going to happen. And as a boxing fan, uh, Floyd Mayweather clearly was itching to get back in the ring, but he doesn't want to fight a fucking Gennady Galafkin right now and fucking lose that 50 and lose that 50. So here's the thing. So you're saying you're saying that tired. Yeah. Can's the thing. So you're saying that. So you're saying that. You're tired.

Can I say this? So you're saying that it's good for Floyd because if he wins, he's gonna win no problem. And it's good for McGregor because it's another weird Diaz freaky flight that if he loses, they knew you box. He goes back and he still have your title. He's a bad, he's a bad mother fucker in the world. He goes in boxes, Floyd in his house. Yeah, there's no downside either one of those 30 million dollars.

All right, stop getting so angry. We're not fighting. Nobody's disagreeing with you. Yeah, I'm certain I'm passionate about it. But that's basically not passionate. It's scary. Uh, I don't like Connor. Connor doesn't look like a complete asshole because he's like, listen,

I went and fought the best boxer. But I had the balls to do that. And I was like, I'm sorry, I'm Connor doesn't look like, Connor doesn't look like a complete asshole because he's like, listen, I went and fought the best boxer. But I had the balls to do that and Floyd's like, this is not gonna fucking be. I'll bet you 25 bucks right now. Conor McGregor, if it happens, knock, floor me, what up? I'll bet you, I will bet you literally

you can have my child. Down. Down, knock some down. Down, no. I say knock some out. Doesn't touch it. I mean, I have 25 bucks. I think he's more like 25 bucks, 25 bucks. Against your kid. No, I say noxam out doesn't touch. I mean I have 25 I think he's more like

25 bucks one of five bucks against your kid. Yeah, guess my game. I get to keep now listen. He's don't have me praying for Conner McGregor. Great. He's a good life in a brother man. Come on Conner. James. Conner. James needs his own room. Yeah. Listen, I a connect. You, uh, James James is a good school. Connor is more likely. Oh, back yard. Connor's more like he has both parents. This one. Oh, Connor is more likely to not connect with a single punch than he is to knock him down.

He's more likely to literally not a, I'm more convinced that if you said either he's going to knock him down or he's not going to connect with single punch You said I would bet single punch fully made with this the greatest defensive fighter of all time. Yeah, you crazy The great I watch I watch Nate Diaz drop two fucking hands straight down the middle on Connor knock him down Are you crazy like a little Floyd's literally probably gonna be like I'll I'm gonna bet on myself of win him and a knock him out Yeah, okay, okay, we made the bet. bet. So you can scream at me or you want. I want my money. I want my money when that little motherfucker's on the canvas looking up.

Conor's a lot bigger. That's fucking, people don't know. He's a lot bigger than a lot bigger. A lot bigger. He's a lot bigger. Lot slower, lot more technically. And when he fucking, we get with that fucking left and it hits the button.

Conor's got a lot of, he's on a master boxer. Conor's a master kick boxer. Conor's got his, his kick son is an orthodox striker. Here's his, what's impressive. You're gonna get in there with an orthodox boxer. The best in the world. I mean, it's, it's, it's, here's my problem though. If he not say does hit him, knocks him down.

I, I'm worried that Conor's gonna follow him to the camera and just that elbow in his forehead. I don't know how you're gonna stop that instinctual MMA fight. And what if Connor comes out and boxes like this, the old kind of steep burns, steep burns, is logo? Yeah. Yeah. Is this a stupid question?

If, if, if, yeah. So if Amy, if, if, if, no, Amy, what's her name? Ronda Rousey, when, when Rhonda Rousey fought Holly home. Was that like a similar matchup? There was a boxer. Yeah. The boxer. Well, here's the deal.

Holly, it's a little different. Holly was the most decorated female boxer to ever move over to MMA, but she moved over to MMA. Also started with kickbox. She started with kickbox. She started with kickbox. She started with kickbox. She started with kickbox.

Kickbox has been training MMA at a high level wrestling to get to. Conner, Conner's going to move over to boxing, which if you understand anything about fighting with kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox.

She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox.

She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. She's got a kickbox. doing that one thing. These guys, I mean boxing is a whole different thing. These guys are learning parts of boxing along with Jiu-Jitsu and Muwitai and wrestling. There's so much that goes into that and they can't.

I understand that, but I still think McGregor, he goes in big. You know what you're doing? He goes in big. And I think that if he gets a shot, you do what I do, right? You make these outlandish predictions because he's a shot, you do what I do, right? You make these outlandish predictions, mediocre sets, here's the... Yeah. Yeah. Too real.

No, you make these outlandish predictions, and then when it doesn't come true, you'd be like, yeah, of course, didn't come true. But then when it does come true, you look like you're this fucking genius. Yeah, you're fucking know it, dude. Dude, top rate is gonna win five, dude. Yeah, right there.

Dude, they're down 20, and the three, but they're gonna come back, dude. There's dance 20 But they gotta come back Good, they're gonna come back don't trust me good You don't know fucking T-bird Like I know T-bird I wanted to call you I was with my cousins and I so mad I didn't but I want to call you and curse you the way you cursed me when the fucking Niners were in the Super Bowl Well, let me tell you something

It would have fucking flipped back on you And I would have went who in the bad down the door Do you want that? I think we got Kyle Shanahan, but don't and John Litch, dude doesn't you guys You got a win for ever shut up, but your team stinks dude. Yeah, shut up. They stink shut up I have to leave and you're making me upset. All right. Let's go. Let's wrap this up. Yeah, we're done This is a very funny podcast as usual. I love you, Bobby. I love you guys, man. Rosebud, I believe in your moon predictions. Thanks, thanks a lot.

I actually, I mean, look, I don't, I don't know if I believe in them, like I don't know where they come from. It's not like a belief, it's just for fun. Yeah, it's fun. I like it, and I think that everybody's right, I think the guy from Scotland had a good point. I think I should stop stuff and food in my face

and be in a little puswacker, which I'm gonna, soon. Thank you for taking that Reese's out of my hand. Dan and Lewis and I. Anytime, Doug. Colin. Anytime, Doug. That's up, dude.

Yeah, I'm all right. That'd be funny if I just had a stroke. Dies in his chair. Yeah, just die in my chair. Bobby, oh God, Bobby, please take a photo. Some but good. That's the end. I want you to take a photo and then sell it to TMZ

and give the money to my wife. True. To me. Oh my God. All right, let's wrap this up. You gave yourself a stroke, Mal. Happy Valentine's Day at all, you fans out there. Oh God.

Let's go to you. Oh yeah, sorry, I'm breaking the mic. Yeah, well everybody snapped a mic out tonight. They're all holding them. What do you guys, fucking Yannis Popus? No, this is broken and every time I put it in it falls. I really do. I've been snapping on people lately.

Yannis Popus sent me a text message. I was just in the shit mood. I just eat shitty. I was fucking on the road. Like, fuck me. Oh, away from my, I was on the road for like a week and a half, a little too long, a couple weeks ago. And he sent me a thing, goes your chubby thing like say you like

Boston my your fat chubby fingers make sure you and I just wrote back your bald your balding no I wrote back you're going bald and that's it and then he wrote no no no I just kept writing you're going bald and then he sent me a photo fuck you I'm not going bald I might be getting ugly but and then I zoomed in on the bald spot, and then I put arrows to it, I go, I go, we see you, it was just too much. I think you've been your most calmly lately. I've been calm with you.

I mean, you guys, I mean, you guys are fucking cool. I never call you because I'm too scared to hear the word of the bomb. But you've been killing it, yeah, you know, you're not a fucking dickhead anymore. So you're doing great. That's true. Um, yeah, I love Scobal, a fucking dickhead anymore. So you're doing great. That's true.

Um, yeah, I love Scobo, but I don't have to deal with him. You know, Scobo, did you do this? Well, he always go, huh? He always say, like, I love Scobo, because he'd always pretend like he didn't hear you. Like, that's the problem is Iris. Huh? Huh?

Huh? Did you pick up the things? Huh? Did you pick up the things I asked you? And I would scream, like, did you pick up the things? Huh? Did you pick up the things I asked you? And I would scream like did you pick up the uh, what? The flyer I told you to make the flyers. I didn't know he wanted it.

I told you I wanted them today. Uh, okay. Okay, what? Go to the room, stop yelling. Why are you the victim? I'm the fuck. Oh my god, when you replay it I realize you're wrong. Why? I go okay, I just say this I went into the character Yeah, I really I'm what a kickstart that is my my thing this year. I'm a work on my temper

I really I'm sort of kickstart that is my my thing this year. I'm a work on my temper Now you've been great. I haven't had it with my kid on my wife In a long time which is good, but it is coming out in traffic and with a couple of friends. So there you go Well, what what else you got? Okay, so Tuesday February 21st hang on let me Rose masters. Oh you are. Yeah, great And you can follow me on Twitter and Instagram at Rosebud Baker and thanks for letting me go first so I didn't sound Just pathetic next to these guys

Hilled Scopo in the rose battle. I heard I did I did hear that Yeah, that's shock you. No, no, no, actually I check out the rose battles You know, I guess the exact just lost right is actually lost the title to that he was pretty funny Yeah, you guys are murderer. Yeah, right and then he called out LA. Yeah, we and we're doing I'll do it when I do my plugs I'll do your plugs careful. I will do it. All right. What do you got? I will be in sack everything Sacramento the end of the month I'm having a website built that's almost done to answer to calm and then billions February 19th on showtime and then every Sunday at nine and bonfire.

Comments for radio series, seven, ninety five. Money's one is great. Joe you and Jay, I believe we'll show you guys have on the next time. All right. And I got to pee. Um, but billions. God, man, I can't wait.

It's a, it's a good, this season's good. It's a, it's a, I can't wait. I wish I could get the, you know, I wish I had a connection. I don't have one. I can't wait. It's a good, this season's good. It's a good, I can't wait. I wish I could get the, you know, I wish I had a connection. I don't have one, I can't even see it. So wait and learn. Navi. First of all, that's bullshit.

No, I swear to God, I've always put up one episode. You can go, you could get it if you wanted to. They'll give you the pass code to the website. You know that. No, I don't, but I'm gonna try that. Yeah, just go ahead, I wanna see the episodes. And they'll go, yeah, here's, they send you a link to a page, showtime page, and you type in a,

use the name of the password and you watch them all. Okay. Yeah, you see all your, you're supposed to, you're supposed to have that. Yeah, I'll do that. Nice talking, well give them me this shit, then. No, you can't, because they know when you sign in from somewhere else.

All right, congratulations for all that shit, man. I can't wait to see the season. And you're looking good, dude. Thanks, Bob. And your photo you put up the other. And you're looking good, dude. Thanks, Bob. And your photo you put up the other day, you're actually a good looking kid. Thank you for what I was doing. Yeah, well, you're a little teenager.

Yeah, well, you're a little teenager. I've seen your photo. You're looking good. Everybody has to do that Colorado. I told you nature. I told you. I know, man, I hope you go bald. What's up, man?

That's a good one, so. Yes, and Rosemasters, every other Tuesday, Rosbus on the next one, but the one after that is gonna be crazy Because we did call out LA and they're sending out three of their best. Oh, I don't want to announce the names until I have the flyer So they're sending out the three best I know I know a lot of I know the whole thing So we're doing three versus three all three rounders. I'm very disappointed. I wasn't asked to do that what the LA one LA versus New York. We had a fucking, you gotta, Rose, but you're great, you're great Rose, but you're doing a main event coming up, right?

Yeah. So that's it. We'll see what's up. So, but they're sending, they're flying out the guys. Are they funny? Yeah, they're fucking great, the guys. The ones that coming out. The ones that are coming out of the best.

Do we know them? Yeah, they've all been on the TV or flying them out. Moses and Ross, Jeff Ross are flying them out. Are they filming this? We're filming it for gas digital. We always film them. At the stand. You want a judge?

I might, if I'm a telly. Marshall, it's gonna be great. Hey, can I say something on the video? Yeah. You got to light up the judge's face. Can I tell you the problem? When we do too much light, it's distracting to the crowd. I know, but why do you ask so many questions?

Can I tell you? Yes, just, you can tell me. You don't have to ask permission. You do the same exact thing. I mean, nonstop. You say, can I say something? You do that? Nonstop.

Let me tell you something. I want, can I tell you something? I don't ask. I say, I'm going to, let me tell you something. Listen, no, you don't say. I'm going to, let me tell you something. I'm going to say, no, you don't say. It's not funny.

Buddy. It's just acting to the live crowd when there's too much lighting. Who gives a fuck? No, you don't say. You're fucking fucking fucking. They have these little lights. I have them right here These little lights, right? You put them on the table you push a button and it goes that's what we have now you should get bigger ones All right, so Bob I'm gonna come and do that March 7th New York versus LA. I'll try it from around also if you guys are Listening live in the chat if you're in New York tomorrow night Legion of Skanks We got a big fucking show plan. You're a fried comp save my jazot. We my friar come But if me and Dave plus we got Mickey go all UFC fighter. We got Mark Norman. Who's it?

Mullen you know who's on the show you Dave Mickey go all Dave who Smith okay from part of the problem. Yeah Fucking great guy. He's a really smart Dave's a good guy. he's good. He's a fucking great guy. He's a really smart. Dave's a good guy. He's good smart. You talk. Does he got a big hug? Yeah, does he have a big hug? Does he really? He really does. Like how big like this big? I think I'm the only person that would know that in this room. How big is our clothes? You see this? No, it's weird. So anyway, it's very smart. He's very smart and very he's a good guy. Good guy big hog. Big ol hog Yeah funny fucking yeah, we'll shut the fuck up though. You got shitty toenails though He was the toenails are

Knows for our two feet You guys and cut the fucking nice fucking discuss here's your deal. He has a feet They hit little would try to convince you that juice head Jesus here's a deal you got a tongue of shut try to convince you that Jews had. Jesus. Here's the deal. You got a tongue that's shut the fuck up. He yaps. He yaps.

Yeah. I mean, dude, I remember doing your podcast. Remember, I was like, just shut the fuck up. That's back in the day. He's gotten really good, actually, as a broadcaster. I really like Dave. Really good. Yeah, check that out, guys.

I'll be in Boston and March. I'm posting that date, because I got to confirm the venue, but I'm posting it on Friday, and we'll be in Boston and March. I'm gonna I'm posting that date because I gotta confirm the venue but I'm posting it on Friday and Yeah, we'll be out Moon Tower as well in Austin, Texas this April. Are you going to Moon Tower? No, I'm not I'm sure you are. I have a notes call. Yeah, I'm gonna be at Moon Tower I had a notes call that I'm like trying like you can go Dan. No, I can't why they just told me I'm too late for it No way. Yes. Why didn't you leave? Because I'm here. I hope you fired. I hope they fucking CGI. What is it? What is it? What is it? What is it?

The whole thing? No, it's called for what? My comedy Central pilot with the producer with the one with three times. I was on his pocket with Michelle Wolf. The one I'm. Yeah. I mean, we got a role. The one that's getting in the way of us finishing our project. Yeah. The one that's one that's one that's one that's one that's one that's getting in the way of us finishing our brother I I was supposed to Yeah, you're But I fucking Am I am I not in this? Yeah, you are but I don't know if the things gonna get fucking

Bobby's in it. I'm not in it. Oh God. No, you're not. I actually can sell you's course buddy. I'm an actor. I'm an actor too. You're not an I can I click you use courses One right now. God do it. Hey, what's going on man? What do you know? What are you interested in? I'm interested in the better sales That's what I want. Oh Hey, choppy want some chocolate? Just threw an epic computer dickhead. Um, all right. Sorry, dude. Oh, that's all right, we're good now. Hey, buddy, listen, know your role. I know the role.

All right, what I got, Deepo. I got your place on the 18th. You have more plugs? Why else plugs you have? Buddy, you just can't have, you can't have as podcast leaders, scanks, characters, answers, and stuff like that.

Oh, God. It's the worst, it was funny two years ago. Go ahead. How do you have that many plugs and be the least famous in the room? Depends on how much money she does in the backing of the moon reading because that could Live Bobby will be at charcoxino qualaballram westulm springs Oklahoma on the eighteenth yeah that's this was added with stavvy baby on the uh... march

second through the fourth uh... bobby will be at the comedy club on state madison was constant my favorite clubs in the world best on the tornado room to you can go have a fucking steak ribeye

you gotta go earlier they don't bring it out mike what stinks to go have a fucking steak. Ribbye, but you gotta go earlier. They don't bring it out. This mic. What? That stinks. What's the thing? It's been stinkin' the whole fucking time. I've been tryin' to hold it in. Really?

Why don't you say somethin'? Smells, it's just smoole. Who was there? Take the thing off. I don't wanna touch it. Take it off. I don't wanna touch it. Did you spray the mics?

I spray the thing every week. Did you spray the thing before the show? You see how it's darker on the top? Oh, it's pretty bad. Oh god. All right, Dan, we all have to smell it. Dan, go next, go next. I'll go last.

That's what it smells like. That's what it smells like. Oh, what is it? Let me see, let me see. You walk into people eating pussy in a steam room. That's what it smells like. That's a minty. Let me see.

Mint, it's something from me. What's wrong with you? You can't see it. You have a fucking heavy Indian food. He's a fucking, this is five of his dishes. Oh God. You pop it with the two fingers. I can't smell anything, but my deviated septum.

I ever slipped at it tomorrow night. Go ahead, what else do I got? On March 31st? You'll be at bananas and hasburg heights New Jersey. Oh as well as the April I'm April first right and One more we get on April 6th 7th and 8th you'll be at comics Mohican Sun in Uncusville Connecticut. Yeah great club

Great club. I can't wait. I got a lot of great gigs coming up in the next four. I'm going to Rubah. If you guys are down to Rubah, there's a lot of Boston and New York people down there the week after, it's a lot of great shit going on. So make sure you come out to my shows and buy your tickets and everybody's show. I got this great app that I'm involved in too

called laughable. Right here, it's amazing. If you haven't downloaded it yet, make sure you check it out. You want a little tech talk before we check out. It's amazing. If you haven't downloaded it, make sure you check it out. You want a little tech talk before we check out It's just a fucking great app. It's a podcast comedy app. I'm involved with these guys and the great thing about it is this So if you go to you know say you go to Berk-Krisher Okay, you go to Berk-Krisher and then you go to his podcast and it shows you all the other podcasts he was on

you go to his podcast and it shows you all the other podcasts he was on. Let's go. You can see that. So it's if you go to him, it shows that he was on Irish, your fear show, Resident Evil, he was on this life 65, all the other shows, plus his shows, he was on crab fest, the Joe Rogan podcast, and it's all right in here. So it's almost like a, you get into like a vortex or a podcasting. So you go to one person and you can go down, like Chris Rock,

Chris Rock was on a bunch, all the podcasts he's been on, a right under his name, laughable. It's an app, it's free. And I think it's the future of podcasts, comedy podcasts, because it's gonna give you the, it's gonna show you everybody that's involved in it. So check it out. I mean, I'm on this thing.

Everybody, Tracy Morgan, Bill Burr, laughable. Get the app today, unbelievable. And also, I wanna thank the people that hydrate, hydrate sparks this water bottle has been helpful. Meow, because I don't drink enough water. That's the problem. I'll drink coffee all day and no water this thing right here. It lights up It tells me when to drink it took up to my phone It tells me how much I should drink all day and

It's pretty amazing. So you want to talk tech this fucking thing is the newest in tech It's hydrate with an eye and look at glows, it glows and tells me when I got a drink of a Tick and I's little sip and then it knows how much water. It comes up right on the app, how much I just drank and tells you to keep going and it just reminds you to have a little water all day. It's pretty cool.

What else do we got? Oh, they can also get the Robert Kelly's, you know what do that on the high-westor Google Play Store and the Go Premium and enjoy the exclusive content there. Go Premium. That's that's a good shirt and go premium. Yeah. We should get those made. Oh, we're doing you. We're doing the Go Premium. Shares we got a bunch of the merch coming out. What else you got? What do you got? What do you got? Lump's eyes. If you're a fan of the show, you email me at ykwdproducer at rykens.com and I will get back to you. I'm sorry, I'm just looking at Lewis getting fat again and it makes me happy. I'm glad you're back. We're at the same spot.

No, are you crazy? You're not. I'm not as bad as you. Pick your shirt up. No, you pick your shirt. Do it. Just pick it up. You pick shirt up. No, you pick your shirt. Do it. Just pick it up. You pick it up. You pick it up. Too fat is just scared. All right, let's go.

Come on. Dan put his coat on. I want to hug the envy for real. Let's go. What do you got? Is that it? At Lorne Cabaret. At Lorne Cabaret.

What do you got, Deepz? At R2 Deepu. And when I, my mom took me to a psychic when I started doing comedy, I wanted to just mention that. And what did she say? So my mom asked the psychic, like, will he be good at comedy or something? Like, will he succeed or what?

And the guy looked at me, I guess he was kind of just doing like an eye check, kind of seeing my eye contact. He was like, he will be on TV one day. That's what I said, yeah. That's great, I hope it's not for fucking killing everybody in this room one day. Hey man, all right. Well great job again. What do you guys? What's your name? Sawyer and Vito. Vinny.

Vinny. Do you guys have a good time? It was awesome. Man, thanks for coming in. I really appreciate it. Are you guys premium members? Actually, no. Well, someday you can be. I think you're a little young to fucking maybe you don't have the money But if you ever do become a premium member if not just keep listening man We really appreciate you guys supporting the podcast and everybody on it, all right? Thanks coming in man. You got it man. You got we'll give you a little poster after you want to sign it All right, I'll see you guys later. That's it another YKWD and hey Keith, I just want to say... You know what the...

You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Shitty jobs. Check out riotcast.com for all the best podcasts on the internet. And they're all free. And they're all free. Shite.

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