Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Club Tit

Episode Date: June 17, 2013

While Robert takes time to welcome baby Max, Kelly Fastuca takes over hosting duties with Dan Soder, Luis J Gomez, Michael Che and Nick Cody.  RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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I'm very excited. Me, Lewis, Jay Gomez, Kelly Fistuka, the YKWD crew, or at least some of us, are going to be heading down to Fox Woods, Casino. June 27th, 28th and 29th. That's one show, one show, and Saturday, two shows. Late show is a nasty show. I'm going to have a couple special guests on there. So make sure you get your tickets now. Go to my website robbercallylive.com that's a Puerto Rican drive from by my house if you're wondering it's not my music I know why I gotta listen to music that fucking loud in your car at 3 in the afternoon Jesus Christ

hot poppy that's why they can't hear how would you say anyways I just made that I put it here so anyways go to robbercullylive.com for tickets and then don't forget I am going to be killing it up in just for laughs. I'm bringing the podcast up to just for laughs. If you're in Canada, if you're going to Montreal, just for laughs comedy festival, you better get your tickets right now to all my shows. Spread the word. Whoever the fuck's up there, fan wise,

I want you to spread the word. I want you to get people out there, spread it on Twitter, share it, tweet it, Facebook it, vine it, Instagram it. Buy my tickets now, I'm doing two hour shows, I'm doing the nasty show all week, and I'm also doing the podcast up there. So buy the tickets to my hour show,

cry like a man, up in Montreal. And then buy the tickets to the YKWD show. I'm gonna call and quain on, big J. It's gonna be an awesome show. I'm gonna have Nick Turner on the podcast. So go to Just For Last website and buy your tickets today If you live in America and you live up by Canada up Montreal get over there It's very short trip get your tickets go up there. It's gonna be a blast to one of my favorite things in the world to do is

The just for last comedy festival so and I just I just signed on to do Toronto. I'm excited about that too. So, make sure you get you tickets just for laughs.com and comics, Foxwoods. And now I'm fucking just rambling until I find my way back to garage band. You cock suckers robbercadalive.com For all my dates and info, make sure you go there. Tweet it, spread it. Make me famous. Nah, I'm kidding. Just fucking buy some tickets.

Spread the word. Dude! You go to my website, dude, and then there's BAM! Tickets, Facebook. Alright, so here you go intro for What I don't care I don't care if I have the the Baby noise in the background, but I do care you talking Shut your face. Shit. No fucking talking. I'm doing

Shut your face. No fucking talking. I'm doing it. I'm gonna tell him how much she's mother should shut a fucking face. Alright, can you stop? Be quiet. How's that? Is that better? So this show, get away from me. I was more my wife was having a baby. we were having our baby so I didn't show up. So the intro to this show is, I don't know what the fuck happened. Kelly put the

get of the show, she ran the board, I's called Club TIT. I don't even know why that's the name. So it's all a surprise to me. So it's going to be a surprise to you. I hope you enjoy it. Club TIT. Just know I wasn't there and I don't want to hear, I wish you weren't there every week. I don't give a shit. I don't want to hear I wish you weren't there every week. I don't give a shit I don't want to hear your fucking Yappy quips. I was just kidding good for you. All right. I haven't slept in two weeks since I had this baby. I'm on edge That's one nice happy thoughts But other than that enjoy yourself God he's crying

The cops are here. What's going on? Oh my god, he's crying. The cops are here. What's going on? Hey gang, this is Colin Quinn. This is Jim Norton. This is Dennis Leary. This is Opie from a lot of things. This is Bert Chrysler.

Staying cookin', you are listening to Robert Kelly's. You know what, dude? You know what, dude? I know what, dude! Ify bippy bbya, ify bippy boo. Dipy dipy dhya, you have a dabbadoo. DUDE! This is Robert, tell me you know what DUDE!

You know what I'm eating? I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm eating, I'm testing your mark of friends. I'm watching you I've started I have two things to say Because I'm here and then you can turn my microphone off. I'm done with the podcast Jesus Christ all right, what is the one recording? Yeah, let's start now Lewis Now Lewis you have to be on your best behavior I don't like the fact that Kelly's hosting this shit. You can host it. I don't want to host it What do you want you not to be hosting it. See who only work if you work with me Lewis. Where are family now? See already five guys got a host. Yeah, I want to see why he's not here. He had a baby. He needs he's like, you know

His kids to rally together keep a show going While his wife gets back from the hospital 20 minutes ago Listen and we're work together and help. Listen. Yeah, corporate. We first off, you want, you know, this is the one episode you don't want to pick the fight because big brother is not there to defend you. And I will roll you.

I have been waiting to roll you. Please don't. But we should on you enough that this is her one moment to host the podcast. Really? I don't know. It's going to be all fine. But we should on you enough that this is her one moment to host the podcast Really, I don't know it's gonna be all right I'm not gonna work if you work with me. All right fine. You have to work with me steer the ship Kelly Can I ask why everybody has take cozy's on their headphones except? Like Americans for people that believe in freedom You're getting your cold freedom cushions you're getting your ear cancer right now okay so

that was Nick Cody you guys remember him he was done man face right you want me to drive this car call right off his cliff I can drive a call right off a cliff all the idea get through all I was doing your voice that's because I usually go high on it oh love side hey hey I was doing your voice Hey, hey, Nick Cody. What do you want me to do? I'll for the gate and drive a call right off a cliff Like everything I'll leave for danger. Oh boy. He does have the beautiful Australian pitch up at the end Yeah, she taught me that It's six with three HIV positive women and not a trite

You know what danger and that's Dan soda And then we've got Lewis you want my favorite people in the world boys. I don't know why you don't love me back No, I love you that Kelly. I just I've been seeing you too much lately, and I've realized what Dan's problem You don't really you don don't have real conversation. You kind of just say what people want to hear. Come on, Kelly. What? You need a backbone.

That is wrong. Keep on entering. But I'm just saying the fucking show. I appreciate your feedback. I appreciate anything, you appreciate anything to do with feeding. I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, I have a, I don't give you that one. That's a good one.

I give you that one. Oh, all right. And then then we got back by popular demand, no demand at all. Michael Che. Yeah, no. Why you have to dig at me? I was the only one quiet. And actually, there is demand for Michael Che.

Where? Because on Facebook, someone was like, bring Che back on all the pictures. Really? Really? Yeah. I deleted it. I do have administration capabilities on Facebook, so that one would welcome.

Chey, I'm sorry, Bobby's not here to be with you today. Can I curse on this? Yeah, what? What? We talk about everything here. I don't know. We say the N word, where there's not black people here and comfort. I gotta start listening.

Really stick that ER. You really, really land that ER didn't you? I call it a cloonie It's better to watch Kelly try to mess with the sound to you look like the worst techno DJ I'm the worst you kind of mentioned it, but why is it Bobby here? So Bobby's not here because Don But me and Dan went and saw the baby on Sunday night. Oh, yeah, yeah, the baby fucking a door I hate newborns. Yeah, that is a durable, harder than James. Yeah. I'm so glad he asked you day because I would have said the same thing. James has got a great personality. I'm gonna smash

my kids face into Bobby body killing kids face Great Korean radio Him in those big eyes I'm watching you Hi, I'm I'm James Gomez You seem so surprised when you said his baby is adorable because my baby is baby His babies are adorable. I seem surprised when he said his baby was cuter than mine because my baby is, I mean, I don't see cuter babies at all. Okay.

Well, I did and it's called Bobby's baby. He had like a Mohawk and his hair was like brown, blondie, it was adorable. I can handle him. He had a boy and was a Mohawk. Yeah, I'm a fucking Mohawk. You can't compete with that. That's true. Yeah, Lewis's baby is more of the criminal record.

Yeah. It absorbs some of the assaults that is dead. My kid was born with a retail. You said, I heard you guys want to go steal stuff in circle car. What? You guys were born with a retail on a teardrop test there. Oh boy, but it was good. He was cute. He's really cute. I'm sorry, Lewis. No, it's fine. I don't actually believe you

That's cute in my kid. I'm just fine. Can I just say right now? What that was my first non-corporate statement? I've ever said I'm very proud of you man. I'm working with through it in therapy It actually did get brought up today. Why is it so like I'm taught I'm not talking to my mic and other people Is it the AC that list would probably bitch about a fuser? Yeah, we coming through on the Come through that you coming through that and glia. I did turn you guys down a bit because you guys are really mad Look at this fucking picture my kid. Oh, yeah, that's cute. I mean Jesus Christ Yeah, why do you have them on a table next to a guacamole spread because I was having brunch out of watching at the same time So what are we gonna do?

So what am I gonna do Jim Jeffries? I just feature for Jim Jeffries on his tour in Australia He's a famous comedian. Oh man. I just hop on the bandwagon and then you tell him when you all guys comes up You know, it's funny about that. He claimed it's one of our guys. Even though he's Australia. That's a good American comedy They have to we take their own people and make them into famous communities. All the way from America via Sydney, Jim Jeffries. Yeah, yeah. Be a London. And, definitely. Oh, boy. Sorry, so Bob had a baby.

Yeah. You guys went to see him. Yeah. He's fucking, did he cry? He was, did he cry when the baby came out? I mean, I'm sure he did. Yeah. But when we saw him, he was just the sweetest Bobby I've ever seen in my life.

So spoken. He was like, hey guys. I mean, now he was stuck in aest Bobby I've ever seen him So spoken he was like hey guys, I mean now he was I got a baby boom. Well good to change his your life. Do you know? I don't think you realize like what it's like you watch your chick have a baby Yeah, cuz first off I don't have a chicken second of all it's kind of like watching Michael Michael Chayon say some of us wait to have baby Watching those jokes before I'll change your life if you watch Michael J perform on stage Someone's trying to get an opening spot. Okay, turn the lights real low. You have to have a duel. I talk you through it

Do it talk me through it I am a which big and took down your son. You have power of the moon Oh god, it sounds like you're from the power of one. I love the power of one. It's a good film Nick I want to ask you here. How long you do full? Till Saturday. Yeah, what a shit. You hear that fucking shitty host thing. She just said just now Yeah, Nick. I want to ask you. What are you waiting? Yeah, she really did just buy her an hour I get it. I can't. I can't.

I can't. I can't. Fucking God. Nick, I'm going over it. That's as you get moral now. So, Nick, I hear you're afraid of flying. He's a bad if I ask you buy an hour. You know what?

He has like the shitty, shitty version of tough crowd. For it's all set up into, I can say that, right? Yeah. What? Yeah, we're just reads. Yeah, he leads comics into bits. a lot of the the the the the the

the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the So she's too busy to watch and comedy related things She needs to have a fucking variety talent show I heard from Pat Dixon's plan to continue on stage Because she booked him to not do the thing he's created There's a really good show

For some of you struggles so hard for stage time How do you put on a show that doesn't offer you stage time? I want every month! It's only a monthly show and I'm on every month I know but it doesn't offer you time to do comedy. Yeah, you should be doing it like 20 minutes. You can think you're not that good at. It's not all for your time.

It's better at it. It's fun. It's everyone gets together. We have a good time and we enjoy our fucking life instead of being angry and shittied all the time. That's exactly what it is. Is that racist? Chew. Whoa. Not knowing your father, is that what you were saying?

I mean, that's not a race thing First of all Dan's dad is dead too. Yeah. Oh, we did way dead like he was dead around the same time Kurt Cobain died Oh, man, that's how dead early 90s. It's so good. It's why I was dressed like grunt. Oh, yeah Grunt you really dressed like grunge. Yeah, it's a dad. It's grunge. You're really dressed like Pearl Jam. I do. Oh, that's right. You're dead. We tied around your waist.

If I had fucking military boots on right now. You're gonna film Cut Hardly White, no. Can't hardly wait. That was a swing in a mess. You should have said reality bites or anything. Oh, damn. By the way, can I tell you the problem with Kelly? She just did this You didn't even give yourself a chance You didn't even give yourself a chance to either bomb or not bomb on that joke

You said the name of the dumb movie. I wasn't really paying attention and then before anybody even fucking reacted to it You had to watch watch watch watch it laugh you have to work with me Lewis Not I'm not gonna work with you. I have to We haven't talked about the big get it in turn yet. What's going on over here? Stop it. Sorry. Do you know I'm talking about it? She's a sweet young girl So she doesn't know you and she's petrified right now. She's not petrified. She does have come over here She does shut up. She does have car over here. She does shut up. She does have car model body.

Have we talked about this? This is the new bus day. Be careful. I don't want you making that much fun of her. I'm making fun of her. She's awesome. Have we talked about her yet? I'm going to show you what you went on.

What's her name? Ro. We introduced you before. You were listening to music. Don't listen when you talk. I hate you, Kelly. What do you want a bear? Yeah? Burr

Mark and burr. Sorry. Mara can bear sorry iron deficiency that you have to have alcohol or else your fucking mouth It's like a copper wheel. We only have we only have warm beer or Michael chase so cool You can cool them off just by touching it You won't make the the mountain silver on a cause light bottle? Do you just go over and touch them all? I don't usually drink. Come on. Hold on, you didn't even do that shit joke.

Because I didn't even acknowledge it. I didn't know the joke, right? I don't know the serious thing. It's row, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disrespect you, but you do have a core model. It's row, she's the new intention. She's fucking smoking up. Yeah, she's do have a core model. It's row. She's the new She's fucking smoking up. Yeah, she's adorable. I got a baby and a white stop fucking stepping on each other Talk if I get fucking screamed at by this if Bobby listens to this But you know what I'm gonna shut down what is that right now fuck up Lewis

I'm the one that gets yelled at he calls me because dad, you know fucking you and Lewis I fucking stepping on each other and then it becomes and you fucking me that and it's you You're the problem. It's not me. It is Lewis. Yes, it is. It's Lewis. You know what? Sad limp microphone Markovied Let's get back to the subject you were talking about which is row. I'm gonna be honest it fucking row Row is pretty hot god damn it. How old are you first of all? Okay, perfect. Give her a beer. Let's party

Row I am your life coach. I've taught you to knock it on your phone when you feel awkward and you will stay Away from Lewis Gomez. Lewis Jay Gomez and you will stay away from Lewis Gomez. Lewis Jay Gomez. Lewis Gomez will end your things about house cleaning and baseball. Why don't you get on the mic and let us know about the new brand of cars that we can see this weekend at the Jabbits Center. All right.

I like it. That's good. Let's take over. Are we taking this away from Kelly? I mean, I like, you know what, Kelly? I think you're doing a fantastic job. Thank you, man. You are. She's uncomfortable and it comes off,

because she's got her arms crossed. No, I'm not. You know, the come across on radio. That's a bad boy. Like, like, good boy. If this isn't radio, it's podcasting. Yeah, but you guys do your thing. And then-

And she's taking video left and right. If it needs to be railed in, I reel it back in. It's fine. You guys play, and then I can sort of direct it in, direct it out, and then I go, it's fine. And then we then I can sort of direct it in direct it out and then I go It's fine, and then we're gonna watch and then we're gonna watch Nick Cody jump through a window for three different takes So is this a scene when a bad guy punches the guy I'm playing through the wind Jump there

And then I run I'm like you guys is terminate it And then we're run! Game of all luck you guys just terminate it! It's a popular film still. Mikko, do you... You've been quoted as saying that the stunt guy is the real star of the movie. What do you really believe that? No, no, you do stunts.

I'm gonna keep Byron Alley. Oh, anyway. Anyone else got anything to do? God, steer it, you fucking dickhead! So, yeah, I else got anything to do? God, stare at you, fucking dickhead. So yeah, I'm here until Saturday. Is that all right? I want to ask you, I know we've talked about this a lot, and everyone's kind of bored about it,

but I want to know, did any of the arguments about all the articles about rape, culture, and stuff that it made it to Australia? Yeah. It did. Yeah. We call that lovemaking. Oh, you mean the article, the city doil-doi-otical about love-miking?

I think you should have a ton of jokes about making love. I rubbed one out when I was reading them. You know how, you know how ingrained rape is into their DNA? That's why they're on that island. It's called shivuriga. That's a kiss on the neck. You had to rape to get sent to a show. It's called shivuriga.

Is that the name of the podcast? Oh, yeah, it's called shivering. But did it make it over there? Yeah, yeah. And then what was your guys' take on it? Well, it's sort of the same as here. People take both sides. However, there was one really shitty comic in Melbourne

that decided to try and hold it. It's highly fisticate. It's been called The Rape Debate, which went as well as an event Shitty comic in Melbourne that the side of the try and hold the alley for stucco the right debate Which went as well as a as an event titled the rape debate would go? Oh, dude, please tell me they never mind About the major I already saw that going to Lewis's fan as he's just then It does sound like the WrestleMania of rape Melbourne's like Melbourne's really really uptight though Melbourne's like

of rape. Melbourne's like, Melbourne's really really optite though. Melbourne's like, what are you saying, mom? You have a rape debate because like you can't be too far on one side. You know what? At the end of the day, you can always lose arms. You're saying rapes okay and then you've lost. Yeah. All I'm saying is take pussy What if you're on it? No, okay debate over I'm going to jail Yeah, you're right. You see some pussy. You just take it Yeah, isn't an actual rape debate somebody in court over rape? That's it's called the trial The defendant gets up never chat about Betty comic get up. No, no, no, no. Jokes about rape and hopefully some will be funny.

Yeah, and then maybe they won't though. Yeah, that's the thing. You see someone will tell the world you just said you get us off the Melbourne crack. About rape jokes. That's people are going to like them. Some are going to hate them.

Whatever it is, but you said the Melbourne crowds can be quite uptight about certain things. crowds what did you think? You were just there for Melbourne company festival Melbourne crowds can be uptight they got money people with money always uptight what Providence is that in? I don't like this is turning into the fucking kangaroo hour with fucking Nick Cody and Kelly for stucco so So anyway, you were just in Melbourne, tell me about this, fuck both of you. This conversation sucks. Louis has never been on a blind. Did you mind?

Is a young sex threat? Louis can't fly, because it's gonna say. Does Southwest go to Melbourne? No, this thing doesn't go there. No, they are uptacked there. They got money. People have got money, I'm fucking uptacked. People got money are uptacked,

because I don't want to lose. Yeah, they don't want to lose that lose yeah I got a job I can't laugh at that did you do shows on any other like did you go to Brisbane or Sydney no no no I that's one of the left Melbourne I declared I'd never go anywhere else but you didn't do outside of Melbourne like Bendigo and Ballarat then to get a roadshow you can't go back or you're not gonna go back I can't go back why no I just move in just push you just push you You can't go back or you're not gonna go back. I can't go back. Why? No, I can't go back.

I just move him. Just push him, just push him keys. They're way too into rape. I can't go back there. Yes. I'm gonna, every time I go back there, I find even the slightest thing that they're really, because Nick, you're not particularly clean.

You're not disgusting, but I find they're really, really uptight there. Like the minute you mention like, on my friend He's black you just like Oh Yeah, Adi Fiquare. Adi Fiquare was telling me that when he went down there with Tracy Morgan like you didn't have a hard time But every time he would like joke around and go yo, you know, I was I was hanging out with my niggas or something

Just saying the way He wasn't even you know, I was a good at pouch roll? Did she? No, but that was... She... He wasn't even, you know, he was... I was a Gwyneth Paltrow right there. That was a total... Yeah. Wineth Paltrow? Yeah, didn't she have like a...

Yeah, she did, she... She said, what? She said, niggas and parrots. Yeah. She leaves with my niggas and parrots. Which is really, that's a nice trick. She was actually talking about... How much of a cool mom does she want to be?

She's... I mean... What are those names? She's a... Yeah, that's not that cool mom does she want to be? She's driving. What are the things Apple? Yeah, that's not that cool. Why did she say that? She was just because of her friends. She's friends with the hove. She's friends with Jay-Z and Kanye.

She sounds like that. But back to Artie Fruquan, there. Shit story. Back to this real goose egg of a story. I didn't notice. I didn't notice that they get really upside about right there. Yeah, but yeah, well, you know, when you slaughter all the average needs to attend. Yeah, when it's a bit of a. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, gone reminds them of that thing they did. Yeah, so why we can't say engine.

That's what yeah, is that why you guys don't do any jokes about Native Americans? Well, we don't because the land is eaten as well. And as the sun kisses her skin and lets us know that the white man brings his iron snake across this great land, bringing his guns and his gods into our land. Dan, it disrespects the buffalo. What do you think about Washington still being called the red skins? I mean, he's a football fan. Love it. I'm sorry. I have what are they going to be called now? The senators?

We're going to call it the redskins. I mean, it's super racist. But good for them. I'm sick of, I'm saying, I've been saying this man, political correctness is the new ignorance. Yeah, that's all it is. Yeah. So what? It's the redskins. We're not fucking, we're not killing an Indian before every game. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were.

And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were.

And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. And we wish they were. That's all it is so it's it's the intentions are not pure for political correct people Which will change it because they don't want anybody to stop giving them money or other shit That's why people who don't have jobs never apologize Tracy Morgan has a job. He'll fucking apologize. They said fuck up shit. Can't believe it doesn't have a job

He don't got a positive nothing It's all about my it's all money in spite. You ever heard the term nothing to lose exactly nothing to lose You don't have to be fucking politically correct I think on the other end of this spectrum. That's why dance night is not gonna change it because he made a billion dollars by the time He was 32. Yeah, so he doesn't really give a fuck. Yeah 60 yeah, if you make 60 thousand dollars a year then you have to apologize But if you have a billion dollars in your 40 it doesn't really matter You know, it's great

One of my friends I grew up with is a coach for the Washington Redskins. And I asked him, I was like, are you guys gonna change it? And he's like, man, do you know how that would fuck up? Or fan base and everything. He's like, you would be changing the name. A lot of people love the Redskins. They're all loving the Redskins.

They don't care. It's these watchdog groups. And it's all these people that are like, we should change this and make it want to make people getting mad on behalf of somebody else. That's a not an argument I can agree with. That's a mad thing. I hate when white people get mad on behalf of brown people. Yeah, like I hate that I hate it. Did I watch I'm gonna name the comics when I watch them at doing like political rallies and they're going like you know and fucking you know all these privileged white kids and they're speaking to a

see full of privileged white kids and he's a privileged white kid and there's no brown people in sight they don't want you speaking up for them you fucking vegan like well that you Melbourne those same people that I get really up to stop talking about Melbourne it's Melbourne it's Melbourne it's Melbourne. It's Melbourne. It's Melbourne. Say it right. It's Melbourne. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it.

That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's it. That's. They just they wait. She's right

Is it a listen to the point she's She said these people never even met a black person Okay, that was wrong. That's a black friend. I checked out. I didn't have a black friends who I was in College and that was when I was 19. I just imagine you imagine her touching her face Like are you are you? Are you a real person? I thought they made you into these idiots. Are you a real person? Like in a hook where you grab the heater's face, the heater?

There you are. She's as good as black, ladies face. There's a human, a great hook roughness. It's very good. That's a great hook roughness. Well, you're right, Dan, it's all these people that want to speak up for black people It's very good. It's a great preference. Well, you're right. They have all these people that want to speak up for black people and aren't black.

And the same thing happens with women, with the ripe culture to bite. Like, women are tired of this. Women don't want, what? Not me. Can you speak for me? Can you hold back it up a little bit and do your Midwestern accent one more time? That's our hit. That's our free bird.

Letter player free bird. Do I have this hurt? I'm requesting an encore of it. Can we hold our blotters in here? We're a joke, cock block. I'm gonna joke, cock block. That joke should be shot in the fight. You don't mind rape jokes. You're on the other side.

I mind jokes. Like if it's a funny joke, it's a joke. But someone getting annoyed about a joke that may allude to rape. Like if it's a bad joke, it's a bad joke. But people getting uptight. Didn't even say any words just now. It was just fucking... You're gay, right?

Malvin? The collaboration of fucking different words and sentences. I said, if it's a funny joke, it's a funny joke and I'll laugh at it, but if it's not a joke, I'm not gonna laugh at it. Whether it's about rape or not, it doesn't matter. And that came out as... You just said it, you just said it, you just said it, you see. And then ma'am...

Ma'am, fucking, ugh, they're the worst chag. Oh man, this is hilarious. Check out the... Ah, hilarious. I can't handle it. Can somebody else this thing Everything's okay Louis Everything's okay now you know what Louis is just chill

It's in like one of those broken countries where they have a king But then there's that weird military leader that you're like that's guys gonna throw this king over throw you if you don't fucking kill him now This has got a bunch of fucking dumb metals for shit that he didn't do This wears those mirrored sunglasses. In the head of an African militia in the jungle, come over, the white fist. I heard he was born. I heard his father was a lip-hud.

So Michael Chey, you had a hard time growing up. Oh, I did, I did. What's a Melbourne at a hard time growing up She was 19 Australia was a lot of fun. Yeah, we're now my here's my question with a woman Throwing themselves at you good looking black dude from America. I have to figure that's like a that's like a vintage that they don't get a lot over there It's a vintage dick That's like a vintage that they don't get a lot over there. It's a vintage dick that they know. Somebody told me to go.

Or they throw a net on top of you being like, oh my god, call the authorities. This is this was somebody explaining me. They said, oh, I know you're cleaning up. You're their shot. You're there what? Their shot. To fuck a black dude.

To fuck an American black dude. Yeah. That's gotta be some. And felt like, yo, it was like the most inspired thing. I've heard. The pressure. The pressure as well. You've got a oh no it's no pressure Yeah, what you go below the player there's no pressure You know how many bucket lists that you just fucking annihilated

You're a bunch of Australian chicks Some of them were Scottish It was an international festival I Was an international festival You got a ton of us and did okay. Yeah, I did okay with it now I'd love to be single. I did okay with their eyes like when you walked in with it like It sounded like you're walking through a swamp. There's the carpets are all wet. It was pretty nice What it's nothing like new. Yeah

Like get away from me nasty motherfucker Any three sims no any three sims ever never never your life. I don't want one you smooth Good looking black. I don't I don't I've never I've never tried to set up a three Yeah, but to say you don't want one's bullshit. I don't want one like I've never tried to set up a threesome. Yeah, but to say you don't want one's bullshit I don't want one like I've never tried like okay, so rephrase that all right. Well, I don't really I don't know you don't want Really you don't want two chicks blowing you I'm sorry to dudes Strengthen sold air behind the candle labrara Strength and solidarity behind the candle abroad

You would you would you would how gracious You would what you wouldn't like pursue it and you I played the fifth once you call my you didn't even have a chick on your own I had it. I've had a three-some-man it was gross. Really? Well, it was a classic one one okay, just like one six and then one fat discussing three I don't have Michael's chase swag all right a six is great It was why you haven't a go at him for not wanting a three-seam if the one one three-seam you had It was still awesome. Yes, because of threesome.

It was two chicks blowing me. What do you do when they're just doing stuff? When they're doing, they're not. They're doing things. Take your friends, I'm having a threesome. Yeah. I don't know, take a bunch of mental pictures, and everyone's on my phone and go, wow.

It is a bluff. I did it. So what is the scenario? Tell me the scenario with your threesome. It was after a show It was where near city This was a couple years ago you know this I know this I do

Was at a casino Where they fucking, uh, when they, uh, American Indian Jakes? No, I wish. Are you kidding me? I'd be doing that voice the whole time. Fuck the fuck? As the two squars. Come to my table.

Come to my table. Come to my table. He can have sexual power. For they take the staff that will make the braves, and they put it into their bowl. They go in the shoulder. Oh, no. For now, share a call and we chief deep dick. Deep dick, oh my god.

And just as, and just like the rattlesnake making eye contact with the coyote, I am looking to both eyes of this sexual snake. So? It was two older ladies. How old? How old? 45. Oh, Danny, boy, no. It was two older ladies. How old? How old? 45.

Oh, Danny Boy. I'm sorry, Prattia. You know what, though? I'm so proud of you. I'm 45. They make 45 minutes. Yeah, OK, motherfucker. I was not.

I mean, they've been, I mean, she's been around. She knows what she's doing. It's fun and great. Both of them were the rounds, both around the same age. Oh, double blow. Double blow job was like, it was like watching Bon Jovi. Yeah, fucking. It was like, they job was like it was like watching Bon Jovi yeah

it was like red they were like it was like they were like fucking well they were both second by day like this was like a big show Like they've been there a million times but it was a big show Can I just tell you the most ace move? Go ahead was one of them I was kissing one of them and one of them fucking ripped my belt off So it made that leather slapping noise and sweeping my pants That it ended up being her face skin

Yeah It was just her skin Your chin fucking your turkey Mac just get with around And then quickly hang on I gotta get it. I'm gonna kill the momentum of the story So yeah, so they were like just like changing turns suck in your dick. Yeah, like just hand Well one was on the balls one was on the dick really and then they would switch and then one would like a frisbee Bernat like a walk this wave video Exactly

And then and then they didn't want to mess around with each other. Okay, they were friends. Yeah, so I would bang What are you married? No, both singled because I'm not gonna fucking married woman with kids really want to the a Wanted multiple kids. Yeah, I'm not gonna get killed. I'm totally worried about getting murdered. Oh, that's the rule Yeah, no married woman. I never fuck around with a married woman The two single 45 year old They've got like a old script roaring ready to go which by the way I guarantee they're both either married or with dudes I think they were the matter one of them had a boyfriend But there was no right, but you know that I kill

Boyfriends are even worse because that motherfucker isn't like a nice dude about a ringing shit This guy's been with her for 19 years. He's got four kids with it, but I kind of love you Connie Hang on don't go to go to the go down. I kind of imagine though. He's got four kids with her. But I kind of love you, Connie. Hang on, thank you for every child. I got to go down. I kind of imagine, though, he's like one of those guys. It's like, yeah, Joe, I have a three. Some people say rubbing himself on the outside of his pants. Won't you go blow, blah, blah, tell me everything that happened.

She'll I started second is dead. And then Connie jumped in and started second the ball. Sharon did well. I said, oh, yeah, we're going to be finished. Put your finger in my asshole. I Shared it will Put your finger in my asshole when you tell me the story So you just fucked them differently. Yeah, and I was I had whiskey dick so I had super dick whiskey dick So I was I mean my dick was hard rubber no rubber put on a rubbers. I went through a fucking Dangerous rubber's a nut. Rubbers. Oh, what do you say that back? You stunt man? It's not dangerous if you don't have a rubber now. Maybe to him why is the reason I get

One of the relatives that come in the trailer Waller has been sleeping. I have sex with him without a rubber Yeah, wait when he wakes up. Oh, I come on him Run out of the house, but Nick's got me and Nick Cody. Nick's spitting danger. I go with you and AIDS clinic and I push all the blood seepals off the floor. So I mean, Nick's. No, I'm not. No rubbers in our spot. No, I think he's gonna go. Yeah, but before that I wasn't oh

I'm shaking your hand bagged it up with two ladies. I met it. It's not even a good casino I fuck I fucked I was 21 and I fucked up 42 year old lady who from a part of Australia called Perth I know I know his balls in Perth. Yeah, and this cheek. She was 42. She was a personal trainer She knows she was a personal trainer Brandon Now the worst part was you cut him off to say it That was a solid joke And then a Lewis Mike why do you have any defense white in say whether or not you thought that was a good jerk now?

Here's the thing It was awesome in the fact of It that it happened yeah, I like I've jerked off to the thought of it But would I do it again? Did you wear a bag joke and off to it as well? You fucking see? Okay Yeah, I like Nick a lot. I don't like you two are gonna go like you're the white Lewis J. Gomez. It's got a good energy if you're yeah, I'm Each people like they give him a bandana right now. He's smiling and he's like all right Australian Listen, I'm not gonna have a three-some with like I'm not the kind of guys gonna have a three-some like two gorgeous women

Like I had no that I I'm like two gorgeous women like I Would Dan on this one because two gorgeous women like that they've never had they're not gonna be good at it They never had to work on these two women. They've been around they know and they fucking want to make him happy That would have been great wait a minute you rather have a threesome with two old bills no I'd rather that's what she's saying, but I think she's got a point. No, she's got a point that they don't more effort in of course I've never got a blowjob from an old woman that they weren't like into and they were good at it But they knew how to do it. Yeah, but you know what? And it's it balances out because if it's a crazy hot chick she can just lie there and it's awesome because she's crazy It does balance out. Well the first time I fuck some like some chicks at Warren Hyderall that were great in bed. This is crazy shit

Oh my god, that's fucking awesome. Yeah, being fucking crazy hot 10 and you're like all right That was a 10 I'm gonna use that image for the rest of my life. I'm not thinking about that sloppy pig that often But that's one nut. What if you keep banging or it's gonna get boring If I'm sorry, it's just gonna you're gonna be like you gotta do something But like someone Dan's age fucking a girl in her 40s is the same reason why I would go for a younger guy because younger guys want to make you happy just as well as an old woman want to make a younger boy happy. Yeah.

It's the same thing. It's great. Older guys don't, they don't give a shit. Yeah, the 42 year old was pretty cool. They don't give a shit. They're like, oh yeah, whatever you want to. And I'm like, no, but like a 24, 25 year old guy, he's all over it. He's really, you know, he's great.

She's it. The 42 year old said one of the fucking most disgusting things I've ever heard in my life though so before we hooked up she's like do you have a condom when I said you have caught and I packed my pockets Yeah, yeah, there's one in here knowing for well I just burst it Oh, that works I look around for a few minutes knowing there's no condom there But I look and then most of the time girls go I must wear them all the time And now it just doesn't have one. That's unlucky, but I just never have one on me And she said oh my god, that's some smart shot up let them tell the story

She said it's okay. You don't need a condom. I just had a hysterectomy Don't worry I'm baron. So you can come in me never Where he's a good thing? Shoot inside They uh they took her out all of my ports that So you can come and mean everything. Where he used to go thing? She didn't sign. They took her out all of my ports that technically make me a full lady. So I'm a half lady. I'm going in rental rent in there. I've got no plumbing.

I'm fine. Have you ever been in a house with a flaws that's taken out of? You can put a trampoline on the boat and jump up and down. That's what you can do with your cum Read or ran in there. This is how much of a soldier and Nicodi is he still so stayed hard after it's too Factor good for you, right? Yeah, this directly is a polar killer I tell a story on a story on stage about when I fucked a squirter for the first time when I was 19 Yeah, and I thought she was pissing.

And this the way men think. I thought she was peeing everywhere. I've never fucked a squirt. Twice, twice in my life. I thought you have. I thought she was pissing everywhere, but I still just kept going. Yeah. I was still like, I didn't want to make her feel bad about herself.

So I just took ignored it. And she's like, in my mind, she's just pissing all over my bedsheets all over everything but I was like I don't want I don't want to ruin this for her somehow that's what men think that's the that's the power women have over us. It's not exactly true though. Yeah. You didn't want to ruin it for you didn't want to not get any pussy. No, no, at that point I was almost not turned on really because I thought she was peeing all over the place. Oh, So, but is it, is it possible? We're talking about, yes.

Like, is it possible for young girls to be as good as older women as far as the conviction they have? Because older women, it's like an experienced musician. They're like, hey, do you do this song? She's like, I've been playing that for years. Look at this bunny. I'm gonna play that one. BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM Shon comes in plays rock mod enough of the cup But you're right, I mean the Asian whiskey

With her tiger mom Ah you practice five more hours. Can we have dinner? The tiger mom of second death She's always flinching when she's going down on you Man tiger mom of blood jokes down on you. You're stuck, Mark Dick. Oh man. Tiger Bob and blow chumps. You're right, though. But is there such thing as a young heart?

I think it's crazy heart. Yes, prodigy. I think it's the judgment. I think young girls that are just as capable, they just don't want you to think that they're nasty. Older women want you to know that they're nasty. That's all generalization. That's a bit of a tough one.

I've been with some 22 year old girls that have fucking been crazy good and bad. Like they could really just throw it down. Oh sure. No, it looks the truth is, if they started fucking when they were 13, they probably get good at it. They're 21-22.

That's kind of sad. It's the truth. Move on from that one. No, that's the truth. They get some practice I'm bringing us down if you put us you know You have to step down that was hands on Probably gonna flip pretty decent by the time you're talking my cousin was a little bit of handsy

Think about it. Why don't we ask this one-to-one-year-old girl and the room when she thinks of this camera I know Why fathers very dangerous man? Who's her father? You don't want to know who's your father? No, she's not gonna Tell you her last name is Norris rope Norris One of those best song about Delta fourth year I'm a champion. I use my dad down I'm I'm Rambo

Ro Rambo I think you know me. East my grandfather Eastwood. I'm Ro Eastwood. And you aren't going to ask for that question because I'm not getting what I need. First I want to know who your father is now. No, who's your father? Skip over that. Ask the first question.

Not the second. Ask your father is a sportatrist that asked what the fuck? No, I think everyone's built this whole story in their head. It's not good. I feel like everyone's built this whole story in their head It's not good the Mark Vendone. I feel like everyone's built this whole story in their head It's not true at all, but I'm gonna take it anyway because if it scares people I like it. Okay father's Batman We know what you know wait, wait, wait, wait, wait I was some credit here because when I first came here I looked at I was like, you know, you look kind of dangerous

I said say that yeah, he did so it's a genetic thing. Yeah, I see it's in the eyes. It's in the eyes No, but no one no one said that I I like the idea of her being like, where were you? I smell like you've been drinking. I have the deep voice me home at 10 p.m. I followed you. I know it. I have a Lotion build on sonar system to find out where you are. Where's row? I called you on the bad phone 17 times your daughter is Only way your daughter is But back to the first question ask the first question You won't know his name no, no, no, not that I want to know

Is that because the courts might even change it is it Henry Hill She's like my mother carry a la gente. Pero eso es la primera vez. ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious!

¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious!

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¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡Dulicious! ¡D ¿No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Solicitate veca información la caixa.org Ya, eso es ya. No, pero estoy pronta de ellos porque somos independentes de las personas. Y podemos hacer algo de la f*** que hay en el mundo. Sí, es lo que hay en el mundo. Sí, es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo.

Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. Es que es lo que hay en el mundo. the age of 20, I'm like, what's too much? You know? Too much 550. How does your father gonna listen to this? Cause one, two.

I don't think he knows how to work a whole. I like fingers. I like having my fingers. So I'm gonna say, none. And you have an head sexually. Thank you. No, it's in the corner. I named my thumbs.

I don't know. I think when I was 21, I think I had a fucked full, guys. I started liking it. At the same time, that's, I don't know, really. I'm gay. 21st in Australia, a big uh, yeah. I think it's not drinking in that day. Two a year from when you start is respectable.

It is. Two a year from when you start. Why are you over? What? I didn't know you heard the question. No, I mean I started out late. Okay. Yeah, I said like two.

I was like 10 when I was 19. I was 19. Yeah, that's great. I took my time, you know. Two a year. Wait, he's talking about the first time we did you take a time? My number is still under I'm 31 my number still under 20 sure 10 what yours is under what you're under 10 or you're under 20 I don't believe you're like religion. I've been like three relationships. You fucking liar. There's no way you're under 20

30 Not you Talk about it. Yeah One dick over three years I'm one dick for one yet. Can you look me in the eye and tell me you're under 30? I will write a list now and decide and there's no way you can backtrack all your dicks. Yeah, I can. I remember all my dicks, all the ghosts of Dicks' past. Kelly left the trail of candy like Hansel and Gretel

for her dicks. She's a Dittrail. No, no, when you fuck the vegan. Oh, go, go. I know girls like to experiment, because they can go talk better with their friends afterwards. Dude, really long. Well, also, you go to NYU. Yeah, there's some real freaks max girlfriend I met her when she was going to NYU and that girl Annie

I probably shouldn't just said it was unbelievable and the simpson any litigment One of the best And she and by the time I was dating her I was 23 she was 18. She was Raising was she so good. I don't it's something about city girls. They don't give a fuck They don't hire where they're like well, I mean if you am you take my pants off I guess we're gonna have to date for about seven months, but then I'll do it your girls like Ready to go like Ready go ho Roll up the Save what do you want me to do? I'm too

You want to see my come on Remember back when we're doing it. You know what I say when you're young that's the time when she's she's gonna hit a nerve when she's set like my friends Like the experiment when we were young we were just fucking just fuck chicks in bathrooms Like you just find a bush and you fuck check it in the behind the bushes somewhere outside of some bar level beach That was that was the roof of the project called the pebble beach was it oh you're gonna rock oh man

dude you know how many she was just a bunch of new port butts and skitted rock dude we would like literally you I mean 19 20 years old that's it you just fucking just try to get laid and ever that's what they're trying to do that's what the girls are trying to do that's what the guys are trying to do so you would just try to fuck anywhere. Yeah, many times we'd literally be at a bar and like hey We should just go fucking the bathroom and a girl be like, I cool. Let's go Yeah, you're right an older woman are like those grizzled vets that come back. They're like Rambo pussy And I get in that dick and they're like He's running for the two. He's the wrong man.

He's the wrong guy. He's the wrong guy. Red by pussy. They really did. They put the headband on. It was a lightning strike. You're going to back to what you used to be, right? It's like, shh.

Yeah. No, I never really came back. Just trying to change. They have old corporalist to talk about, old boyfriend. You're all right, Sheila. You're at home now. And as you're coming, she's just walking off not even looking behind the bigest coming ever I don't give up that life Those second right on the floor

Tosses the lighter Man Rambo pussy I think we got a name for it Rambo pussy, right it man Rambo pussy first night. That'd be great Speaking of being a young kid My buddy mom just found a picture of all of us on our teenagers, mooning the camera, and I spread my butt cheeks, and you can see I'm gonna see my young balls. It's gonna bug me because you're gonna bigger balls in me than I have now at 16.

I got a decent piece. I know your piece. I've seen your piece. Have you ever doubled in to check with another dude? Yeah. Yeah. Never never. What? I've run. I've done trains, but I've never done it. Same time. Wait. No, that's what we've taken. Yeah, that's right. Never. Never. That's my situation. Nice balls, bro. It's like a train. It's like a balls, bro It's still like a trying it's like a trying but the carriages on At friends that did it, but I was always squeamish about that. Yeah, not a I've done it a bunch not a bunch, but I've done it like a few times

And I think I'd say at least 75% of the time I did it just because it was like the cool thing to do Yeah, many times have you read a train or double team? Well, I've run a train a couple of times. I've double teamed a few times. I've double team once. I've never run a train. I've never double teamed. I nearly had a break in my mind. No, but she's had trains one on her plenty of times.

Well, that doesn't make sense. I mean, that's just me. No, but I nearly had a tracem once. This, when I did it, I was Schafer's beer. You guys know what Schafer's is? You can buy it. You can buy like an 18 pack. It's like a Midwestern beer. It's awful Like natty ice type, but way worse. It's I think it was 899 for an 18 pack So it's just clearly you shouldn't be drinking this shit. We get a beer and uh

I was back from college. Sorry hang on I was back from college. Sorry. Hang on. I was back from college. And there's this girl who's a year younger than me. She was a senior in high school. And she was just like, you know, 18 year old body. And she had me and my buddy Adam. And she's like, you guys want to go? That's such a different thing on a girl than a car.

Yeah. Well, you know, that one's up. Come on, guys. Boo. Boo. Boo. But she, if you ever boom me again, I'll break your kneecaps. But she was like, do you want to see my boobs? And I was with my buddy, and I was like, yeah, I'd love

to see your boobs. And then she pulled them out, and we're in this guy. We're at a house party in this kid's dad's office. And she's like, we should have a threesome. And I'm like, I'm not touching him. I'm not touching him. And she's like, no, he'll have sex to me, and I'll blow you. And I was like, all right.

And I was wasted. It was pulled. She blew me. He banged her so quick. He finished and left. And it was just so basically it wasn't really. I don't believe it. Maybe for like two minutes. I mean, David. Did you go in? Did you go in after? No, I didn't fuck her after. She's blew me. And then they, the kids dad walked in and I had my, I still had my pants around my thighs. And I had my shirt under my chin like a little kid. He And she's just blown man. I go hey how you doing? I want to get stains on my t-shirt.

Mom just asked it. Get the fuck downstairs. That's all he said. I was like, uh, he's And then his dick was out and that's what he meant. I really am. Do you want me to suck you while she sucks me? Is that what we're doing?

Pop up. Get the fuck downstairs right now? He's gonna be a hard on when you're finished with her. That is poor no dialogue. What are you doing? What are you guys doing without me Me and I mean Dave We double team to check this fucking check with such as she's the hangar at a comedy club is a lot. She's such a slut here Stand up New York check Double team tour yeah, I dated her for like a month well your class

After not before oh That was the good by potty no, no, we stopped dating for a few months and then later on we we're just drunk And I was trying to convince her to fuck me. Oh boy. Oh, I'll throw David I was trying to convince her to, but you did yeah, of course That's what Dougie style was invented. I'm a Christian But no then his fucking just got on my sheets. It was a whole thing dude. Where was it the old one? Where we used to watch? You bang Was it that apartment in Queens? Well, it was my, it was, it was other girlfriends.

It was other girls. Yeah, but I'm saying is that that was that apartment. Yeah, that apartment. Yeah, I tell you the comradery of white men. It is something special. Whoa, Che. Oh, he's got a real thick dick. Is that where we used to watch you fucking last girlfriend?

Like, Jesus, I have no friends like that. What guys are doing? Wait, you mean you don't have friends? Well, apparently not Well, you know what black people are really not good people Black so black guys I can send this friend send this for a long time black people really I don't think I have a friend I don't think I have a black friend that would ever so this is a what I think that they any other friends dick ever Well, there's you guys don't have me you don't need to

Maybe your mom's got a big dick no shit In the sun is hot Well, you guys don't have me you don't need to maybe I'm also got a big dick no shit The grass is going blue we get it the fuck out of there with their bullshit Josie sequins dick shit huge To train ain't running White guys like I mean seriously They're like to for dick is It's here cuz I'm not even white dude with a big dick is more. It's like a unicorn. Yeah

Exactly what unicorns are why do the big dick? Unless I see it doesn't happen so like black guys don't do that. You guys don't compare dicks. Cause I don't know men, but I know these men. And this is all they talk about. And you talk about food. Yeah. Okay. None of my friends have ever seen me naked. Like I've never double teamed with a girlfriend of mine or anything like that. That's because you have an upside of titties. Do that. I don't have a upside of titties. Changes checked it out to see if it was true or not. Oh, I think that's the way I checked it out. Oh, come over to, come over to, oh, just look at titties. That was good timing.

Yeah. I was just so happy to be looking. I think one dad was wearing the one bra, and they made fun of me. What is, I remember I've seen people like this when they have like one leg longer than the other. They have to wear a shoe that's special. Stays a bra off, there's a sex show. Of the Peter Brock.

That's actually the funniest thing. I have club tit. We have a club tit. Ah, club tit. I have club tit. We have a dammit, man. Club tit. We have a club tit.

Oh, Robin tit for stupids. I just got hammered this. What you're gonna wanna do is take that old wagon wheel trail down there. There's a shack with a woman with some rock, lopsad, and titting. If I heard a rumor if you titfucker, you have to put one over into top of your dick

to burn your shit. You really have to have to. No, I don't like that they're the same size that's probably the funniest thing I've ever had love started titty looking like an old west sheriff old love started titty's back in town

oh my god the fucking the funniest thing I don't know what it is. Why are we look? You a tit man or an ass man? You know what? I'm an ass man. I'm losing everyone. I'm an ass and leg man, but I've tits are growing on me. It sounds weird. It's a grown on me too. It is. I'm starting to get into the To the dead thing. I've already got you Nick Cody Tits and legs What's tits and legs? No, don't be

Coopers I like it good as you Tits are ass tits. Okay, okay You look you're definitely I could you have a Titman vibe really? I like a couple things. I like a roll snake. Oh like a nice coyote beer in a big city titties. No, it's too. I like a couple things. I like the rules. Snake? Oh, like a nice coat beer in a big city titties. No, it's too neat. I like to take a nice Camaro for a clip.

And then I'll lean safely or pull it to the side and I suck on a big dick. What about you, Lewis? I see all of that ass. Puerto Rican men, kind of be ass men. You know what, that's not a nice trip. Puerto Rican girls got some fettos, did it. I really like, I really like legs,

I like stomach on a chick. What? I like stomach. That's like what's your favorite sandwich? It's the bread. Like, there are more about. The ends of the bread in particular. What's the crust?

What's the crust guy? What's the crust like? Is it, are there sesame seeds in the crust? I love the asparagus on the sandwich. Oh, I'm an arugula guy. I'm a really, I'm a really, what's the sides? What are the sides? I'm a tick guy and we're losing,

I'm in it. We're losing everyone to ass men. I'm an ass. I get more compliments. He's got an ass. He's got an ass. I get more compliments on my ass anything else. I've gotten last month I've put on a bit of weight and I've noticed like I whenever I wear links

It's like my ass is like I've never had that much attention from guys before I'm like took a look in the afternoon walking and they're just like and let the other guys We like guy like come up to me started walking along with me and he was like oh the milkshake oh and I just had a go away I don't know you that is one thing can it milkshake well I love milkshakes but it makes and cheeses me to cheeses with milkshakes I had a drum comic come up to me the other night and you want to be my friend milkshakes oh I love me, Jake. Can you take me there? There's definitely a creepy vibe coming from men now. Even like a comic day of the day, who's really drunk. I remember when you first moved here, you're bigger than you are now. But now it's all that one, Teddy.

Now you're looking good. I was like, I can see you later. I hope you don't remember this to my butt. See, but but's for me, I don't know. This I like I like a nice butt, a butt, a nice butt. So I could appreciate like a sunset. But I there's something I like a sunrise. There's something deeply. You know, when I see a nice set of big titties, I am over the moon.

Look at that. Your question, when you when you're with a girl, what's the first thing you go for? The titties. Really? I go right for the just a man. Now you got to go right into the pus, because at that point, there's no turning back.

I went to a strip, I went in a good left hand one. If you get in there, if you feel wet, it's over. Oh yeah, that's what you can get in. I'm talking about prevailing the territory. So you have to mash sweat on top of big titties like right here You know what is that? What are you talking about? I might be a tittie guy too, but you know what is it?

I don't like big titties. What? I'm gonna slap you in the back. I like a nice flat. No, I like a nice flat. I'm gonna tell you like a boy body. Now I like a nice beacop like a nice What?

I like a heavy chested Diddy fucking for me is you had a big dick. I can't take it fuck It's I've really fuck is but that I actually take it fuck to go with small titties. It's hilarious Shit did it really looks like an artist drew it but didn't know proportions Like there was too late to go back Proportions like there was too late to go back City fucking is really hard to must ever once you get a club 10 My ex-girlfriend was

I don't like to do cuz she I want it's gonna get the right like dumbest it is stupid But it's soft. Yeah fuck everybody. I'm on team Titty fuck Want to get the hang of it. It's really good. Oh, love it. Yeah, especially the chick likes to likes it when you spit I never come to the fucking why have came eight? I just came now. Oh my god I hate it. Why do you hate it? I feel like I feel like both of us like it a little bit And it just doesn't make sense. I had a she even like it on my sweaty hairy balls just rub it up against her? Yeah, the blue ass. My ass hole is on her chest. It's just like gross.

How are you sitting on it? Like what the fuck is your doing? You're doing it wrong. If your ass hole is on her chest, you're doing it wrong. My ass hole is matched up. You open a black hole. The dinosaurs are flying out. My asshole had navel is matched up Flying out But I'm not I'm not

Strattled and older and older Michael Chey runs through a black hole So you gotta stop doing this right now. Hey young blood You changing that you do it Lewis cuz like one must have a hint of color You're in a main like you have sex normally and then like a little too deep fucking between it's kind of like a bit of fun No, it's just changing it up. Yeah, I don't just do that No boom boom boom boom and you go back to normal shit. You don't smack a girl every time We have sex Oh fucker from the back. No, I'd be do you fuck look I'm not in I'm not saying I don't like for play I want to do for play a fucking suck under pussy or asshole or fucking finger

Black dudes don't eat pussy or ass Of course a lot of black dudes don't eat pussy a lot of black dudes don't admit they eat pussy It's a pride every black guy. He's put trust me every black guy. Just like they say black girls don't suck dick But I've gotten some unbelievable By the way, or else X is gonna be on the fucking now this home Michael Douglas thing hit or else It's gonna go down bro. Not out of Got it. Just going out it what's that can't just going out No, well first of all it's first of all. No, wait a minute. That was good And you guys did it. No, I got it. That was good. I didn't get it into now

Cancer is going up Your American accent really sold it. I think I know I think people are gonna be afraid to switch a young people Crazy though that fucking story of a macho Douglas well. No, here's the thing people are gonna be afraid to switch a young people that crazy though that fucking story been mocked on this well No, here's the thing people are gonna be just do the AIDS has been around for 30 years people still don't back up We think cancer is gonna change something good. It's a little different dude You're cancer. It's a little bit more walks With cancer, it's not all blacks and gays Cancer it's not all blacks and gaze Not good

That was good That was good I'm not gonna like I love that one This is a white man disease We need to kick the bottom of this shit Finally we found something that can get the white man down But listen, how did they get it?

Is it because like he went down on a good old age? No, HPV Yeah Cause cancer However, he didn't If if you read the full transcript of what he said, he didn't say he got it from eating pussy. He said there's a chance that he could have gotten HPV, which can cause throat cancer.

There is a rise in correlation between HPV and throat cancer. That is true, but also listen, this is like shit where all of a sudden now deodorant might be causing cancer, like there's a bunch of shit we're overpopulating. Yeah, so the earth is trying to buck us. Natural selection, dude. It's, it's, everyone has HPV, that's like a fact that four out of five sexually active adults

you have to do. I don't have a chance to like for a non-seggy. Three months ago, I don't know. No, you don't have the, the cells that cause cancer, but my doctor told me this dude, he said literally if you swab your arm, anybody's's arm if you swab a doorknob You're gonna get HPV cells. It's just it's everywhere Just the way it is and if you've ever had here's a thing if you've ever had genital warts That's actually the better form of HPV the best form of it because they said that if it doesn't if it doesn't show

If you don't have if you have HPV and it does not show in warts That's they believe the kind that can causepv and it does not show in warts that's they believe the kind that can cause cancer and guess who got rid of his warts seven years ago where are they they're lying dormant yeah no they're not why would you say that shit yeah one day you're gonna get really stressed out then they're gonna come up stress out right now that's a trick war saying around a trick. It's a war tank around. It's a war tank around.

No, when you burn them off. No, they're always in your bloodstream. It's a virus. It doesn't go around. I think war's the big idea. What? War tank. War's the big idea.

War's the problem in this room. No, when did you get punny? Bob, you hot-walk into the fucking room. But I don't think it slows down eating pose of your second dick. No. I think it will do with young people. I really do think it will I really do I do I try to agree with Lewis. I think it will I think they're gonna get young guys like 19 year old guys that I really selfish I'm okay because I haven't got anything yet. No, I think is a selfish because I'm learning it yet

I don't know how to like you know go above themselves There that's there's some back to some sorry about Kelly fucking a 19 year old guy one time that didn't do anything But come to belly and leave And that's just furious. No, keep on bringing it up. So ran rap What have you ever done that? Yeah besides on a hooker or a party? So ran rap is that the stuff that you wrap up your sandwich with before you got to school? Yeah? Oh my god You can get that on a vagina. Yeah, and then yeah, you need pussy dental dam bro. Yeah, man Why would you do that? It's still warm and it's still because hookers won't let you meet their pussy without it

He's got a good point. You do that now. What did you do that before? I did it like when I'm doing anymore No, no, I'll argue if I was with a guy and he got he was like yeah I mean I you pussy and then he grabbed out these fucking raft. He was like all right. All right, lie down get comfortable You're not a hooker I'm down these fucking rap who's like alright lie down get comfortable. You're not a hooker Yet I just I just couldn't do it because I can't imagine looking at the drone like this. No, you don't smash Funny, you know what the funniest thing is is when you're when you're peeling it off And

You Put in your pocket in your pocket. So your brook, I could have you just pulled that in your fifth pocket in your jeans. The dental, the dental, the dental wallet. You're excuse me. The dental thing, you just take off, you blow it up like a balloon, and you tie it and not give it to her. Happy birthday. You dress smiley face on it.

But like I said, I'm the king of eating pussy from behind, which is one of the greatest things. Really? Yeah, dude, I understand that. The end of the of the shit on his nose Did your pointy like in the asshole nose that you know right that's why kids love it What's that what do you smell boy? What's that huh? Get it some dick. Get it boy. Get it. Get it pussy. Get the pussy dad. Is that peanut butter? Is that peanut butter? Yeah.

He's such a good boy. Sit. Sit. Ah, ah, ah, ah. Sit. No. Down. All right, go get it, go get it!

I can't. It's the one. That's the filthiest. That's the filthiest, why can't I be doing anything? That sound is the best. I want to tell you about the tom that I nearly had a thrasom. Alright. It didn't.

It didn't happen. It didn't happen. So all the end of that story that I already know. I would have really blown it. No, it was a guy that I was dating at the time and I was doing a lot of drugs. And it was his best friend and we were both all three of us were making out on the couch. So I was sitting in the middle. I just went back from one to the other, one to the other. I was really high at the time because I had some speed.

I'd snorted some exesie and then just had some coke as well. What were you backstitching? Fucking poison concert? And it didn't happen? Yeah. Good or you are the worst. Something happened where I realized what was going on. But then I went to his bedroom and I fucked the guy that I was with.

And the next day I woke up and there was blood all over my nose I'd had a blood nose during six and none of us noticed because it was so fucking high And you know what it was it was chapel street and Nicky will concur that chapel street No, but everyone gets it's like nightclub city everyone gets high and it's very drug I was like I would have been this club dude, I need to do a cocktail. There's recovery clubs that close at 4 p.m. the next day. So you get fucked up. Then you go to the recovery club at like 8 a.m. and people are all just off their face isn't then you go to the recovery club because everybody's gonna be off

their face and then you just. So Kelly was one of these kids. Yeah, but I don't understand you know how Kelly you what the dragon tattoo Self-crime I'm more upset for the friend of the guy who are dating who just had to make out with He had just done a lot of coke. There's no way he's gonna get hard anyway guys can get hard off coke So he was kind of soft and wasn't happy. Well you can get it a threesome on spades So who knows yeah, but drugs like coke is the worst for dick. I get a hold on on coke. I can't come on coke weed. I can't do weed You know, it's funny. I can't come on weed, but I can get my dick hard I can't I had to have a weed cookie and didn't work it did not I was terrified cuz you get paranoid Yeah, no shit

I'll know who works by the end of my drinking if I had like four or five drinks in me no way I'm blowing a lot Four or five yeah, if I just had any alcohol got super dick. Wow. No way I'm blowing a lot. Four or five. If I just had any alcohol, I got super dick. Wow. He used to take me a lot. We'll call it super dick. Super dick. Yeah, you just go forever. Oh, you never come.

That's a really annoying. That's very annoying. Oh, it's not really worth exercising. Just sweating. Just sweating into her mouth. I'm sweating. Everyone be quiet. Everyone be quiet.

I'll be quiet for a second. It's that guy that chose to treat someone. He's going. He's ringing. Hello? Hello? Where's the mic on this thing? Bobby, she's blowing this on the bar.

She's so awful. She just sucked out the momentum we had going. And I don't mean in the final con. Bobby? Turn it on speaker, you fucking dold. What won't you plug it in? Yeah. There we go. That's good.

Yeah, no, we can hear you. I wanna call fans, do a phone. Thank you, thank you, Bobby. Bobby, turn that off, Bobby. It's working, let's just make it fun to me. Sounds like a god damn generator. So like we're doing this in a fucking... Yeah, turn the AC on off. It's working. Lewis is just making fun of me. Sounds like a god damn generator. So like we're doing this in a fucking... Yeah, turn the AC on off.

Alright Bobby's calling Dan's phone now because Kelly blew it. Again. No, you just fucking attack all the time Lewis. You want to say people fail. Kelly, that's not true. I want to say you fail. You're not even a person, Nibbay. Kelly, I think you're a person.

Thank you, Danny. Very lopsided, titty person. You're not even a person to me Kelly I think you're a person Club tip is my favorite Club tip might be the line of the fucking years You guys it sounds a bitch's So anyway, you think that your balls are Hey Bobby Hey, Bobby. I'll see that's that feature money.

How did I get a laugh on my joke? I know I did because I backed it up because I'm a suck up. Get back to that. What's that? She's fucking picked up. Just let it all out, dude. picked up. Just let it all out, dude. Is she No, it's actually we're we're actually having a really good time. It's started bad. No, you take a fucking 18 lineup.

I know. Hey, when I'm not there, Lewis, you nicked, trying to nick the stunt man Cody. All right, she's got to name with a B. But if you convert it into Australian, he's an A. If you bring him to where the toilet flush right here to be. Um, well, I'm sitting here with my baby. The, you mean the baby that's more adorable than James Gomez?

It's a good looking baby, right? It's a great looking baby. And I'll tell you this. Peaceful. Lewis is face is unbelievable. Lewis is a is unbelievable. Lewis is a few. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry.

No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry.

No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. No, he's about to be angry. I hope Well Bobby congratulations buddy Yes Mike I'm here Congratulations Bobby Stop getting shit I'll do my best to fuck it up. Don't worry

Bobby Bobby with everybody self-esteem Bobby if I've noticed one thing about I think Michael chain might be the next Wesley Snipes. So I hope he's fucking he can't come back to the country to this activation. We'll congratulations Bobby. Congrats Bobby. All right guys, I wish I could be the next you take it all with that Kelly.

Thank you Dan. I love you buddy. All right, love you. And you know what Bobby? You have to hang out around 20 years. Yeah. Now Bobby, this is going to be the only time you'll ever hear me say this. All right, love you and you know what Bobby? Now Bobby this is gonna be the only time you'll ever hear me say this But Kelly's done a fantastic job of hosting this podcast I'm just kidding

I think we were just telling them why? Have a good one, Bobby. I've got one. I've told you nothing, Dad. You should have hung up and we're right now. I just did. I got him right when he said hung up. Maybe the teacher has become the student. Back to the Lopsided Teddy. No Lopsided Teddy, I've got to read through some of our sponsors. So everyone, if you listen every week, you know that we've got some sponsors for you. First one, tweakedaudio. Go to tweakedaudio.com.

Lewis and Danny, you guys bought some headphones? I did. You did? Tweet audio. Great. I bought 17 pairs. And he didn't give one to his baby's mom. Because he's a piece of shit.

I tie them all together and I hit her with them. No, my God. Okay. All right. Well, I mean, get a tweet dot-a-go. Must expensive whip. When you're gonna tweet audio dot-a-com. But I got a 33% off because you use a promo code, dude. Thank you, okay, I was gonna yell at you for interrupting me,

but if you're gonna help me along, that's good. Tweet dot-a-go, use a promo code, dude. And what do you get, Lewis? You get free shipping? Free shipping, they have eight different styles of headphones. They have fucking eight different colors. They have ones that you guys are working out.

They have, oh, they're all in here. They have one want to be out of wood. Yeah, who the fuck does that? They made headphones out of wood They're inexpensive, but they're tough and adorable and they're good. Yeah, I'm evil fuck my Apple headphones They're the worst. Yeah, you can beat it up with Apple headphones. Stop it loose I can't stop it. So tweak. Dolly dot the code, dude, get 33% off free shipping. Can you guys hear me? Am I very loud at all? No, you're starting to. Yeah.

We're okay. I want to be louder. No, we're good. No, there we go. Oh, there we go. I want a lot of things. Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait. Okay, so twigdoddy.com, okay, word, dude.

And also you want to go to rightcast.com, forward slash Robert Kelly, Killick on the Amazon link that you get this podcast every week for free, so we will rely on your donations and your help to keep us going so we can buy stuff for the studio. In a few weeks time, we'll be moving into the new studio which we're going to hook up with our video content for you. So anything really helps. So if you go to Amazon.com, buy yourself whatever you need

but just do it through our Amazon link on the RightCast Foresash Robert Kelly page, not the Hammer Fisting page. I think it's actually backslash. It is backslash. It's not forward slash. It's forward slash. Fuckin' Lewis, you really fucked this up. It's backslash. It is. I'ma be on a deck.

Hang on. It's fine. It doesn't matter. They It doesn't matter. It's a line. Anyway, it's a line that you press. You'll get there. So click on the Amazon. When you buy something for yourself, that helps us out. So we can buy stuff for the studio. Same with Gamefly.

When you click on the Gamefly link on rightcast.com for a social robot killing. It automatically comes up with a connected to us. Every time you buy with the Gamefly, we get a nice little thing. on right cast account for us. Robert Kelly it automatically comes up with a connected to us every time you buy with the game fly we get a nice little thing for us as well and it's a it's a 14 day trial. Oh my god. That was really butchered that I don't do the game. You know that one right. I've done I've bought stuff with. When you go to the right cast page for Robert Kelly

buy or why do you want to shut the fuck up. Why JWD write cast page? Stop that. Click on the GameFly.com link. Use that link for the 15-day two-game free trial. Two games, Netflix of video games, you get free shit. Why KWD is giving you two weeks or 15 days of free usage of one of the best services in the world. So if you play video games, obviously you've heard of this

service, you should take advantage of it. Even if you don't play video games, you're not sure. Oh seriously, because I'm going to do that. It's's great because I have a PlayStation. I have like two games No, do it do gameplay But I'm definitely there is and you get a fridge right? You don't got to keep it if you if you You obviously want you to keep it yeah, but try out see if it works for you Yeah, I don't know anything about video games, but I got what?

Some all right, you don't want to pay $80 a game you want to you know you with this you say it's like 10 15 bucks a month depending on the package you get and then You get unlimited video games. Oh, what I want to see you get addicted video games and then you career We're gonna welcome Che yeah, it's been more successful than ever for some reason this event You're like my health coach and also we want to look at the the other on right cast.com all the other And also we want to look at the other on rightcast.com, all the other podcasts that we have to offer. So I have Muffesting, is one of them. Lewis, I don't like the way you're looking at me. I hate it. You're so...

Judgemental. Yeah. Yeah. Comedy seller podcast is really great as well. And the glory hole, the other way you should listen to the glory hole, it was a Billy Hayes, the original writer of Midnight Express, even're in the guy that got arrested for drugs, smuggling in Turkey in the 80s. Is there anyone?

No? Oh, you remember? Yeah, he's great. It's a really good type of glory hole. Rich Vos Bonoic, Fowlin, as well. Who else have we got? Davey Maxport, Pirate Rantin. Jim Florentine.

Jim Florentine, Bailey J. The fucking, I was at a website the other day. I found myself there upon a journey. She's so fucking hot I can't even handle that She has a dick. Yeah, but she's dude. Yeah, that's what she's saying. Let her finish She's so fucking beautiful. Oh, and then we had medicine mad scientist party hour So I'm going to check out everyone else good everyone's great. He's gonna hate that part You guys well you're looking at your phone. You're not not I wasn't looking at my phone for body So I'm going to check out everyone else. Good, everyone's great. He's gonna hate that part.

You guys, well, you're looking at your phone. You're always looking for a phone. No, I wasn't looking at my phone. The body listens to this. I was looking at my phone at all. I didn't have a phone. I'm looking for a new phone. Phone's on.

Hit her and put her in those plugs. Dan was looking at these phone. He was trying to figure out why it can't out during the cold of Bobby. I think that's what it was. It's not gonna happen. We're here. Here's the fact. Okay. What?

Yes Lewis, you look very inquisitive. What can I help you with? Nothing. Yeah? Kelly, I think you did a great job today. Well, I hope so. Thank you. I think Rose a great...

She's great. Rose Hark. Rose Hark. Go, go. Rose, you are very attractive. Okay. But we're going to keep you at arms length because your father is extremely dangerous Ro Hill he's really like some five things. He makes men disappear really yes

What other shanksong from Mortal Kombat? You're so it is my Think of Batman plus Iron Man What that's the whole wait what? Wait, what is the Avengers? Tony Stark is wait, Stark is not what I'm a star Batman and Iron Man? I don't watch Iron Man offense

It's like, damn it, offense To whoever's out there, like some That means nothing What are you studying at school? I'm studying screenwriting Really hard dance These are cool These are very endless Those are those were in when my mom had

And better than ever mom jeans will never be Take me a butt, which is what I need Fashion cues affluence don't you amelie here make you know what you wear because you just have to look at himself Q's a fluid. Don't you amelie here? Yeah, but what you wear cuz you just have to look at himself. You ever get your naval caught in a zipper? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Oh, she's got female oracle pants. She's great. She's not a cop. Let's see. She got her. Ro, how do you feel about the new flavor of Coca-Cola?

Do you like the new Coke? Or do you like the old Coke? No. What do you think? No, all right. All right. Do you need a bro when you're building up? No, no.

She's not a comic. We like your jeans. Yeah. Thank you. Right. You look great. Don't have a listen to it. Ro, look at it. Ro is beautiful. OK. We like your jeans Look Beautiful, okay, she can get some shit about her dumb pants I'm telling we're telling what guys think of your pants don't tell me that cuz I wear them out a lot

I'm telling you that guys hate them We think cuz you're hot. It's fine. We don't know. You go. We're goddamn fucking two two. We don't give a shed Tutsas are hot. Another not They are yeah, they are hot if you're a dude that drives a windowless van They're gross if you pay taxes Support your local congressman Yeah, all right back to Kelly's lopsided titties so much attention on you. What's up? Back to Kelly's lopsided titties. So much attention on you.

What's up? Oh, stop it. I like it. Lopsided, tittie. Oh, back in. Oh, misspepotion bags. I heard you's backing down. Better rally up.

Everyone says that the crops brought in and open lopsided titties. The rain is a common. She used to rob trains by distracting them with a long,rune lift. Boom. Oh, boy, oh, boy. I heard a story that her father put some whites on one of her titties, and it's stretched out.

All right. Bruce is checking his phone. I'm tattling. I'm on Tatl-Tail. That is the funnest voice I think you've ever done. Well, basically used a parable Sam Elliott. You got to take forever to just go, wow.

I'm upset. I'm not even thinking of you. Nick, Nick Cody. Yes. How long you in the States for? Until June 14th. All right. How about that long?

That's my dad's father's birthday. Well, thanks for bringing the mood down Nick Dan I really appreciate my mom's boyfriend hit me when I was a kid you're talking about that Apologize in behalf of my country. That's all right at Nick Cody. They Nick Cody. All right fucking Southern Dan We are Southern Dane. Nice V-S-G-N-S-A-K! All right. Michael Chey, where are you going to be at? This probably won't come out another week.

I'll be in Bonarou. Oh, fuck you, man. And yeah, that's going to be fun. And punchline San Francisco and, yeah, uh... well you just check it out uh... chape thanks on twitter tell everybody where my date so all michael chape dot com beautiful dance out where you gonna be on uh... will be at next comedy strap and fucking bastard uh... june 14th and 15th and then uh... in july be uh... cancassity at the Denver comedy works and uh... maca wine and florida who, and the House of Comedy had Minnesota at the end of the month go to that house comedy

Mall of America miniapolis Bring your cheeses bun room. Yeah, I'm excited to do it. So and dance order dot com And Lewis J Gomez. What do you have full the table? I'll be the North Point Northeast festival this June 13th through 16th. I'm doing a bunch of shows. Actually, it's actually be awesome. Big J's going up there now. Oh, I can burp. Dave Smith. And then at the end of the month, we're doing Fox, Foxwoods, me, Kelly Fistuke and Bobby Kelly. And 27th, 28th, 29th of June.

Three shows and then we're goingth, 29th of June. Three shows and then we're gonna nasty show on the Saturday. If we get enough people down, we're gonna try and do a live podcast for everybody. So don't wait until the day to buy the tickets. Buy the tickets now, buy them all now. And that way there we can tell which night we're gonna do it. If everyone's coming on a Friday night,

we'll do it on a Friday, but if you got buy them all the day and then it's sold out on Friday night, we'll do it on a Friday, but if you go by more on the day and then it's sold out on the day, we can't prepare. So buy tickets beforehand. Go say it'll be great. Go see Kelly Lewis, Bobby. Yeah, and then also. And then probably Kelly live.

I want people to come to this too, actually. It's gonna be one of my last shows in New York that I'm doing. My buddy Dave is doing a Caroline's breakout show on July 9th, Caroline's in Times Square. July 9th, I'm gonna be featuring, and it's gonna be one of my last shows before I move out. What do you think?

I'm leaving the last week of July, but it's gonna be a big show. Okay, now it's gonna be like a fun show to go to. The biggest fucking beast, really, really funny song. Yeah, I like that. Smart comedian, and he's about to blow up, and yeah, it'll be one of my last time to see me. Definitely the last time to see me.

You gonna lie? Yeah, I'm gonna lie. I'm gonna lie. I'm fucking out. Yeah, now I'm going more because you're saying that My push it back up a couple weeks Push it up a couple years ago That's just main Dan well, I love Lewis and we're gonna go I'm being serious. I Well, you know what do you want plug? Under belly, who do you get it? Uh, under belly? Yeah, under belly? Yeah, anniversary show on the sixth of July.

Two years, a lot of big, big, big stuff planned. It's a great show, it's so fun. It's such a fun show, we had such a great show last week. Guys, can you shudder on what you want? It's fucking great. Oh, it's kind of a badass move. Yeah guys, a few fans fans of Stand Up comedians, and not doing a state art of stand up comedy,

and you understand the struggle of getting stage time and really practicing and honing yourself in art, if you really understand any of that stuff. Yeah, you're shitting on a show. It's actually, it's actually a fun show. It's a fun show. What happens there? I don't know what happens.

It's like comics, but then all I do this stand up, they're gonna do something else. So it's like people that have these like fucking like tricks that they can do or like music, you never knew that the- It's a talent show with comedians, different talents besides those. It's funny though, it has to be funny, you know what I mean?

Kelly was inspired because she looked in the mirror and realized she had no comedic talent. Say. Say. Oh. Oh. Well at least we're leaving on truth. I'm just kidding, this is the truth in Louis Shay Gomez. Anything else? Plugged everything, everyone said everything in a time. Oh At least we're leaving on truth

Plugged everything everyone said everything on Twitter. I don't have enough 20 followers I think I'm so you should know what people know people know what you think about black people. That's it I can it's bullshit. It's done. They go to LA fine leave me What you said 15 different things there. No way to leave All right, all right. No way to leave. Alright. Alright. Alright, let's get out of here. Bye guys. So I say, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, ¡Junt stop! ¡Fuelme en mi peor!

¡Junt stop! ¡Fuelme en stop filming my bed. Don't stop. Con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras desperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelas desde Madrid a Murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad. otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros.

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