Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - D*ck Bumps

Episode Date: April 11, 2016

This week on YKWD: We have Joe List, Luis J Gomez, Jason Kanter, Greg Stone, and Myka Fox! Joe pleads that we maintain our "Bomb-tegrity". We analyze the upbringings of whores and cage-ighters. And Jason tells us about the time he got a false positive on an AIDS test! Watch/Listen and enjoy! RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ya son casi las dos, nos vamos a ir a casa o hemos venido a jugar. A casa, a casa, nadie va a irse a casa. Hay que ponerse modo de racón. ¿Eres un dragón? Soy el dragón de Fireball. Ya te digo yo que las mejores historias siempre piezan con un chupito de Fireball. Bien, frío. Yo, pues al lío.

Un Fireball, sabes que la fiesta será épica. Ignite the night, con Fireball. Disfruta de sabes que la fiesta será épica. Ignite the night con fireball. Disfruta de un consumo responsable. 33 grados. ¿Yoros escuchar a Robert Kelly? ¿Y qué es, dude? En la network riotcast.com. ¡Valcán!

¡A la fuertes podcastes de la plana de Burre! ¡Es una costa! ¡Aspacas de las paredes, no hay un rujo! ¿Qué es mi gas? to the funniest podcast on the planet Earth. This is gonna be a cost-defying podcast. It's no rules. What are the mic-ass hole? I'm sure I've already said should I regret it? Can I get a mic-a-fuck? Oh, what the fuck?

That was trying to keep it like a comic-ass. I have a bunch of guys on. It's just us sitting down, and sometimes it's hilarious, sometimes it's 10 no topics. No directions. I love doing it. Play both sides of the coin coin that's how the whole stuff

The day you think my podcast is popular Never know Wow. Fuck it. Ha! You're such a creep. Just gave fucking metal hand jobs, some rock and roll hand jobs to your friends. I love these. They shot loads at the end though.

That was pretty good. We're back. Another live show. I love these, they shot loads at the end though. That was pretty good. We're back, another live show with doubling up on Tuesdays, two for Tuesdays. I have throat cancer still. Can you call Dr. Dede? Can I intro the fucking show without you making it about your dumb lump?

Fun. Did he go down at all? What stop all I just got under shake the I care about him doesn't gone down I care you don't have my wife That's a fun joke Bobby whenever Lewis talks just crank my cans down a little bit and then put him back up Come on, he just did the joke twice He did it when one wasn't on air you do that's how the host does no

Dushy it was on my fucking little scope you fucking cock you know scopes stinks Now you know you spend people on that and there's a leather listen to this there was 46 people on Lewis globe Fuck face 46 yeah, yeah more people are the listen to two days with faggots We had Mateo on one time. 46. What's that? The age you won't reach? Come on, I got you. Okay, someone killed himself on Micah's train, so she's running late. He was listening to Scopus Act.

No, why? It would have been better if you said, was she doing stand-ups? That's really suck. No, Scopo though, it was a knock on Scopo. I know. I know. Yeah, but it would have been funny if you said,

oh god, do you explain it to him? It would have been funny if you said it the other way. Okay, you dumb. Well, you dumb. But you hustle. Yeah. I want to suck a lady dick. Listen, let's get in it. Can I introduce the fucking Joe?

Bob he doesn't want you to be the host he wants to be the host. All right. Thank God. I'd be the host I don't want to be the host. I want to cure my neck and suck the lady Well, that's how that's what I'm getting you're gonna get lady jizz lady guy jizz is how you cure cancer throat cancer And you do it to everybody scope. Oh,. To my right, we have Greg Stone returning. How you doing, Greg? Hey, welcome. Hey, Greg. Thanks, thanks, having me.

I forgot your name when you came, but in the joke, gave me shit, but we met twice in life. Not even, actually. And you look different now, because you have a beard. I don't have a beard. What are you talking about? You have a beard. You're not shaving.

I had a beard last time, a great beard. Oh, well, that's why I didn't recognize you. I What are you talking about? Not a beard. You're not shaving. You're unchavened. I had a beard last time. A great beard. Oh, well, that's why I didn't recognize you. I mean, this is hurting more. Fuck, I took a shot in the dark at that one. As soon as I said it, I'm like, no, no, no, no. All right.

Speaking of great beard, have you met my girlfriend? Thank you. Welcome to the show. Thanks for having me. Thank you for coming back. You guys were just hanging out out front. And with Joe, you went over for the birthday party to the Flamagos Italian restaurant. Lombardies, Lombardies.

Whatever. And you had some pizza and you came back and you're hanging out and now you're up here. It's great to know that how to get on this podcast. Just be standing outside. With pizza. I'm gonna bring you up. I'm not supposed to eat carbs.

I've been shoveling them in my face. There's no Lamberties pizza you're crazy and of course we got the fucking I guess 14 the hashtag hashtag the show bitch Puerto Rican Rattlesick real-ass dude For artists formerly known as the harrow cent of MMA radio Kevin Brennan killer Lewis J Gomez Gomez His neckles would be more tanned. They weren't scraped. Well, racist. What? That was an erase that you're a fucking monkey that you scraped your necklace on the ground. I hear the word monkey.

Thank you Robert. Thanks. Listen, what do you mean Kevin Brennan killer? You think you took him out? I took him down last night. You did? Took him down a peg. Did you take him down a peg? Took him down a peg. What do you mean you took him down? I don't think you took him down a peg at all. I called them

I called them you called them you called then you didn't really yell. I know when you yell you were kind of subdued and You you made niceies You didn't fight no nice. He made nice. He's he's yeah, but you accepted the nice. Yeah, what am I gonna do? He didn't back down He was like, God why do you always got to get somebody else's fucking back over my Bob? Wow, that's a statement. You make a lot. Yeah, what am I going to do? He didn't back down. He was like, God, why do you always got to get somebody else's fucking back over mine, Bob? Wow, that's a statement. You make a lot. Yeah. Yeah, same thing with fucking cow head. I've seen Bobby. I've been I got I defend you more than you know. Yeah, he does. One time. And I defended you yesterday. When I hosted Anthony Kumi a show, I defended you. Plus the time. Wow wearing a fucking legion of Skanks hoodie. So that's double defense.

Remember the time we were at the seller table and everybody was saying he sucked. You were the one saying he was innocent. Remember that when S.E. brought that up? Yeah, you said he's got a couple good ones. And she said, no, no, he doesn't. I don't know. No, no, no.

No, no. No, I didn't. I just want you to fight with Kevin. Yeah. I think it would be great. Yeah, well, he wanted to start a podcast war. You know, you bring your fucking heat to me. I'm gonna bring it back. Everyone knows that.

Everybody? Does that podcast war or you just made it a podcast? No, no, no. He made it a fucking podcast war. I mean, he literally trashed everybody. I don't give a shit. You don't trash me. Trash everybody else.

But nobody can trash you. Not him. You need a shit. You don't trash me trashed everybody else. Nobody can trash you not him You need 10,000 Twitter followers to trash me right on That's actually I kind of agree with that I accept that all right. Who else we got we got it's course Joe list Buddy, so that was you get sorry. I said truth Joe list is here. Let's go Sorry, I said truth Joe list is here. Let's go All right, hey buddy. Yeah, it's your birthday tomorrow's my birthday, but tomorrow I might be dead I got a throat thing for still. Oh God happy birthday brother. How old are you 34 34 years old? Wow? Yeah What do you mean? I know I didn't know you find. Yeah.

I didn't realize it. Me and Jeff, we were born a few days apart with the exact, I also just tried to do a couple of days ago. So happy birthday, buddy. And his son's birthday is my sobriety day. We have a lot of interconnection. I was the first day, buddy. I didn't know was your birthday.

And my sobriety date is the date that Sarah first cheated on Joe. Sarah cheated on you. Yeah. One time she did. I don't think so. I think he's trying to, like, you know, get under my skin. My face. Why would you pick that?

I don't know. Why would you pick that? You know he's very sensitive about his career. By the way, it was nice seeing your ex girlfriend. She looks great. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha She had compliment her boots right in front of me. I want to punch him in the chest. Tell you this. She was like, I could have said body. She was walking up by herself. Believe me, I could have. And I haven't seen B in a long time.

And I was on the phone with my wife. When she was walking up, I was like, wow, who's that? And I was like, hey, and then she was like, hey, I'm like, oh, B, shit. Well, I was walking up and you were talking to her and we just saw from a distance. I thought there was a fat Mexican guy hitting on B. I was gonna run over and punch him in the head.

Bye. I don't know, cause I'm a psycho. But she guy hitting on B. I was gonna run over and punch him in the head. Bye. I don't know, cause I'm a psycho. But she's not you anymore. I know. Would you really fight somebody? No, no, not at all. I'm dating. I'm out there.

I told her to date. I was like, go date. What'd she say? I've been. She said, I don't need your permission, you fucking dumb ape. Who else we got? The last we have Jason Cantor here.

Jason Cantor, and this is your first time on the show. Yeah, and you were roommates with Joe? And Chris took Jason's room. Oh, you do? Where did you go? I'm in Upper East Side slash Spanish Harlem. Oh really? I'm in the United States. I'm like straddling the border right now. Didn't you get that fucking deal?

You won. You won one of those housing lottery. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? They are 34 million dollars? Can I talk to him? Can I podcast you wouldn't even know that if I didn't just say that? Yeah, I know But you've been set there noticeably staring at you, but you said it and now trying to get to the bottom of it called show wise He show wise Joey, alright, I'm trying to figure out the fuck show wise Joey you're right try to figure out the fuck show wise You worry about it. Don't this thing I've heard He's show wise. I was once asked where the bomb and there is of course it's on Lewis's go ahead

What what is this? What is what did you win one of those housing lottery? You know you put your name in a it used to be be in a, some sort of a hat, but for actors or something? Yeah, it will. Yeah, it's an artist housing. Yeah. So it's like, they put $50 million into a, a schoolhouse from like 1898. And you, and you got picked. Yeah. One of the, there were 53,000 people applied. And I'm one of, there's like 89 units there. And you got one. And what is it? Nice. It's pretty nice. It's a lot. It's like a lofted thing. It's got the ceilings are, I don't know, 15, 17 feet. How many room? How big? How many square feet?

10 sort of saw us the bend is head down to get in. 460 foot. 460 square feet. And you rented or own it? I rented but in perpetuity. Like I never have to leave. That's not a good idea. Do you mind me asking how much? It's low. It's, yeah, it's people are going be angry at me 550 of all of a month. Oh less than that

What it's less than that. It's less than $550 a month So you get literally just never become a headliner Your life is done. This is what you do now. I went from taking exclusively feature work to exclusively MC work now. No, but I mean joking, but you don't have to, I mean I think one of the motivating factors in becoming successful at anything is the desire to have something more or bigger

or blah, blah, blah, but if somebody gave me a house in Boston back when I was gonna leave I don't know if I would have left I would have been like fucking I got a house I'll just stay here and do the columns and hang out with fucking Steve Sweeney old every weekend but you know to have an apartment like that you don't have to worry about rent you know you don't have to come up with two bills you can't give it away though where you have to stay there. Yeah, there's all kinds of rules about What you have to do to you can't sub love it. Can't sell. Yeah, that's one of like you would get kicked out Is it all new stuff? It's all yeah, it's brand new

Exclusively gay sex no heterosexual sex You have to fuck guys only I Did they make me fuck guys? Yeah? I do they make me fuck guys yeah. What do you kind of like? Let's work it down. I'm the five. Hands in an old haunted school house. What's not haunted?

It's just a, you know, Spanish school. That was one of the... That was one of the... I bailed out of racism halfway through that. I should have just big skill each other. Oh, oh, oh. I said that because you know, because that should just big skill each other. Um, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that It's yeah, it's all artists, but one of the first meetings, because it is like a lot of, you know, some hippie-dippy artists and shit. And they were talking about like the ghosts, like, I've had only some janitor killed himself

in this building years back and there was a kid died. And they were like, people were legitimately worried about the ghosts in the building. I'm like, I'm worried, we live, like, I guess between 96th and like 101st is the most dangerous part of all of Manhattan, like the most robberies. I'm worried about our live neighbors more than the dead ghosts living in here. Yeah, 99th Street. I lived on 97th between third and the legs. Okay, so two blocks up from there. So the projects. Yeah, I think it was the schoolhouse for the projects. It doesn't sound as good now.

It's like crazy old building. I'm sure you remember that. Yeah. I do. I do. Me and Burl lived up there. And it was, Jesus Christ, 18 years ago, whatever the fuck that was. We lived there. And it was kind of, it wasn't that bad.

That was not that bad of a neighborhood. And now it's better. It's a lot of high rises. I mean, even on 97 streets, there's some high rises. Yeah, I used to go to the gym on 96. I'm like, that's a nice area right there. Yeah, pretty nice, right? That's good, but what a fucking deal.

Now, can you bring a girl in? Can you have a roommate? No, you're not allowed to have anyone, there's like a rule 14 straight days, but it'd be pretty hard for them to, you know. Hold on a minute, time out. You can't bring a girl to visit? No, you can, yeah, you can't have a guest longer than 14 days.

What if you get married? Yeah, what if you get married? I think you have to move out. So if you get married, you get a fucking go. Then I got to pay a ton of money. So I got to save up. Really? You got to really love a bitch to leave that situation. I don't know if you call her a bitch. So you can penalize for leaving early? Yeah, you just fucking five minutes behind the conversation. I can catch that part. You said he has a part where he has to move the fuck out. Yeah, I don't know because there is a you can apply for other ones like if you have a kid

and shit like that. Like I say a kid, but I I don't know if you have to get back into the lottery situation or if you can't you can't do the lottery. What if you'll never get back in? I still I still fill them out for our new buildings that come up though. Why? This could be a back here. You're a fucking scumbag. If you get another one, I swear to God. I'll punch you in the face. But you but you say that but you don't fill them out.

I did fill out a few of them. I got into not even it wasn't a lottery but it was like another artist. I was like, how's it going? I didn't take it because it was too far for my kid. How do you where do you I would fill these out? Where do you go? Yeah, you should be filling it up. Yeah, where do you think? I have to read on white and white. I'm going to fucking fill them out. I'm going to a wife and kid in the house. I'm a lesh just there. I want to fucking crash pad. I want to fucking bang pads.

Can you do that? Can you get another apartment and keep that? Technically, no. It needs to be your primary residence. How will they know? You can poke your nose. I can poke your nose. I can poke your fucking poor ass off.

The poke in the fridge. Yeah, there's right behind you. There's a coat of them. Bobby, I'm not poor. Hey you are your brown. We discuss Listen to Lewis Gomez makes money. He has a shagel mess. I'm Jesus Christ Get you lesion of skanks diapers limited time only We all know for one week only they come with shit in them We all know one week only they come with shit in them No books in there I don't know books oh

Boy Lewis beat you to the good thing there Lewis beats other people to his own thing That's pretty ancient why to get weird because Bobby sucking on a fucking Filter up. Why are you taking food in your mouth when you're hosting a show? It's a fucking... We can hear it. We can hear it. You have lozenges a whole time, but little with cancer for three weeks.

I did. You're hoarding lozenges. I did podcast before. I don't lose my voice. It's all right. I put a lozenge in. I'm sorry. It's a worthers original show.

You call Dr. Bill. I start to Steve first of all, you fucking ass. And number two you you're fine Number three there was not one. I want to suck Girl PP2 all right now it comes back around would you really blow a shimale? No, so you're not attracted to them No, but it's a fun thing to say so you really wouldn't sleep with a shimale No, but I do wish we're talking about this before I do wish like a girl gets a satisfaction of performing oral sex and something burst into their mouth

I like that idea like a girl just comes it's just it's drippy and whatever Yeah, it's not like it doesn't you're like a girl like I wish you would a girl blow you a trainee blow you no why yeah I'm a thing of all men a relationship. That's the first thing Okay, well it's sour was like yeah, no was single. I wouldn't be particularly comfortable with it I'm not into this the scene, but you didn't know she had a little peepee I didn't know obviously I would then you find out after I Have a friend who will remain nameless, but oh, I know he hooked up with a chick like yeah It was like a stripper after a show and he fucked her in the back seat and she was like oh, I need my lube

And he was like that's weird that you need lube for your vagina She lifted up and I fucked her and the back seat and she was like, oh, I need my lube. And he was like, that's weird that you need a lube for your vagina. She lifted up and I fucked her. And afterwards they found out she was a post-op tranny. Yeah, boo. Yeah, boo. I'm into it. Not the post-op.

Yeah, I don't know. I mean, anything. I told the Bobby once. I was like, he was like, what the fuck? The minute me and my girlfriend break up, I'm going to, I'm going to, anything. Everything. Fuck it all. You have a girlfriend? I got a girlfriend for like eight years.

I'll fuck anybody. Do you like her? She's the best.. I mean we are not attracted to each other, but I love her She might as well be post-op she needs a little bit of turn around I've been to run years. Are you kidding me? No, I don't know Maybe I get over the post office to double my together Why you think that's bad? You you you want to break up and fuck trannies? I don't want to break up with her I love her. She's the best. You love her. You want to be with her, but if she died What the fuck if she died? Yeah, I would try everything you'd fuck everything. Why not? What are dead body if I can't if I get there? I'm not okay if I get there and it's just what it's hot Just gonna do I do it. I'll do 34. I think in this day and age right now where we are yeah with sexuality

Yeah, I think if I if I was single if my wife Don't me I would do the same thing. Why not? I would fuck everybody would you help me on? I can't I've the straight up dude. Not like no, but a hot dude not just any dude. Gollman. Deepu. No not gollman I'll fuck deepu. He was not hot. I was deep. Is the handsome is fucking in the end Arab I've ever seen in my entire life That's great. I have a like saying the funniest Puerto Rican, it doesn't. And they really are just a gross people, but he's fucking gorgeous for one.

Depeux gorgeous. He's a very good looking. I say I'm behind it. Yeah, I would not, he doesn't nothing. I'm constantly told. Do you get hotter, Bobby? Do you get hotter than him? Indian guy, fuck yeah.

Yeah, I get one that's trimmed up a little bit. Find me a better looking Indian guy than Deepu. I like, yeah, as he is get one this trimmed up a little find me a better looking Indian guy than Dupu I like yeah, I see is not better I just don't like Harry guys. Oh, it's over man. Well then Indians are just out of the question Not all the Italians Russell Peters in that the Harry That's a sign of handsome guy though That's a great when you when you're trying to pick a, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl.

That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl.

That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl.

That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, girl. That's a cool mess, coming. I'd tell you this, coming everything. I, this, this, this, what about her? I'd fuck her. That's a dude. Good. She's gorgeous though. But it's not a dude.

She has, she has man face. I don't care. That's what I said. She's got man face. I mean, I love Bailey J. Yeah. She's my friend. I don't ever see that.

Bailey J is the perfect. Bailey J is hot. Bailey J is hot. I do, I love her. But because she's my friend and I'm friends with a husband and we're really good friends Like that part of it is turned off and I knew because I'll know but this this Michelle firestone is Way better tranny's that I look like the type of Jersey girl I like post up. Oh, I do like those. No She's got a fucking

I'll come. I'm not you're saying that's a dude, but Bailey's a girl You're giving preferential I was she is no no Michelle is a girl, but you said dude. Yeah, but I said it to you guys you understood You bailed you what I was trying to say no, I was trying to say that that is a Transsexual I should have said it that way. I just I like to keep it a little politically correct You're right. No, I know I people have been taking my political correct ironic upsets as serious People like what do you fucking the police?

You're very monotone. You're one-tone. You're PC police. Yeah, you're one-tone. Social justice warrior. Keep going, Bob, that's insensitive. People are like, hey, why don't you fucking relax, you douche? I don't even know why we have to fucking treat transexuals like they don't have a problem though.

What? What the fuck? That's just a hundred. No, but like, no, no. Homer, I look, I have anger problems. I have to admit that I have a like a defect, right? Like a T.S. shirt right now. You have anger problem leads to fighting and violence,

whereas that doesn't lead to anything. That doesn't lead to anything except just something different. No, no, no, I'm just saying, look, I have friends that are transgendered. I mean, I'm legit, I wouldn't watch a UFC fight with a transgendered girl who's like a friend of mine. Oh, big J, it's a woman. But it's a big Bailey J.

No, I don't want to, I don't want to make a big J. Do I know her? I don't think so. She comes to comedy shows all the time. She goes to the school. She goes to school. She hit the button now when she hot. Yeah, she's cute, she's cute, you know.

So she's listening. Is she cute? She's cute, look, from a suit? Yeah, she's cute. She's cute, you know, so she's listening. She cute. She's cute. Look, from a suit? No, it's not so. I had a training show, dude. I had a whole training week. I know I would have five trainees in there, right? Five trainees in there. I'd make that would say, why not? But look, I'm just saying, if I have to admit that my anger problem is a psychological defect, I think transgender people have to admit that they have a psychological defect.

What? See, but they want to chop their dicks off. No, they don't. Not all of them. A lot of them. Not a lot of them. Most of them. No, some of them just have penises

and think they're females. They're more female inside. They are more fucked up than the ones that want to chop their dick off. Come on, Simon. I'm on this side in this one. I don't understand. Dude, you have a freehouse.

Yeah. How did you take a side of any? Now I can, because I'm not going to be homeless. I don't have don't understand you have a free house How did you take a side of any? Now I can because like I'm not gonna be homeless. I don't have to worry about it. I hate to say it I'm sorry, but like the whole thing with defect the only thing it makes a defect is if it can't exist in society The difference between gay and pedophile is pedophiles a defect because you want to fuck children Which is a problem gay just makes you You don't really to say I don't have to say anything. You don't hold on. You really want to suck a dick. You don't suck all the dick.

No, I don't. Greg, you don't do it. But I don't like. If you don't want to procreate, if you're in the, even if you're a straight male, a straight woman, you say, I don't want to have kids, I think you have a mental defect.

You're going against nature. You're not. If nature wants us to have less people on earth, they don't. How do you know? How do you know? What nature does? Yeah. How do you know? How do you know? Because this is what we do. How do you know? How do you know? How do you know?

How do you know? Because this is what we do. We probably, but how do you know? How do you know the evolution? Okay, you're right. You guys are right. I'm wrong. We're not supposed to be procreating. How fucking stupid am I? But if it's not like every gay, if you're not fucking just turning into a baby when someone disagrees with you. I'm like, I'm wrong. You're right. Okay. We, we, we, we, we, we, you grow up. You grow the fuck up. I agree with your first You I agree with your first assessment that there's something off if you want to chop you dig off But this thing about the procreation that I don't I don't believe in that Can I just pause and let he's a very he's a little quieter than everybody else I'll let everyone scream there. He's been trying to say something. He used to scream until he got that free house

Let everyone scream. He's been trying to say something. He used to scream until he got that free house As far as the I don't know about the word defect, but yeah, like something is off and just like if and I don't have a problem If you're if you have a dick and you want to fuck other people with dicks you are a homosexual and that's fine But I don't get no, I'm a lady, but I still have a dick and I fuck dudes like that's a fucking Defect, there's ever been a defect why isn't it? It's a defect. I'm not saying that they should be put into a fucking oven like the Jews I'm saying that it's a fucking defect But I'm sorry Mike. I'm like you can't cook them twice Lewis listen. I want to say this We it's a defect says who?

Why is it a defect? Who said that allowed to say that? That's who said it's a defect me. I just say why because it's again Fucking nature that's not normal if I want to cut my hand off you'd be like guys We should maybe get Lewis some help because he wants cut his hand off You want to hand off is a thing because then that's gonna make you like it's it's It's saying or a lateral you can do a forward pass So I'm gonna move the ball forward But up but it doesn't it doesn't hurt anyone else. It's not all right fine forget the word defect. It's just not fucking normal. Yes

What I would normal when they take away the boys and girls sections and apartment soars and go Oh, well, we don't want to hurt the feelings of transgender people Which are point oh oh 1% of the population. It's just like come on. Why are we playing this game like that's the fucking I don't think that They want that they don't want that they want to just if if she's a Transgender well, she's gonna go use the ladies room. I mean, yes, she's gonna be weird seeing her stand up in P But she just wants to go use the ladies room because in her brain in her body She's a woman she has a penis What all trainees have huge dicks not all of them you fucking pervert everyone. I've seen as a huge dick

All the good ones because the one that showed the dicks off had the big dick Little dicks don't show off their dicks. Yeah, you know, you can pull. What you have to do is type in fucking like Small trainee dick. Yeah, wow, you can do that Every dick I've ever seen ever has a big dick. That's why they're showing me the dick. I see little dick like girls have small little peckas. What? Wow. That was horrific.

No, I was trying to statement. Oh, there's a statement. Oh, that's true. Oh, no, no, no. Oh, it's not funny, it's a statement. I told you. I told you. I told you to take it out.

I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out. I told you to take it out.. You're welcome, happy birthday.

Michael got hit. Do you want to introduce Michael? I make a how are you doing? I'm great. Thanks for having me. Did somebody die on your train? I hope so. That's the only reason I had accepted delay like that. Really? What happened? They said it was an injury of Montrose, but I'm like, it's a fucking death. I'm sitting on this train for 10 minutes. I'd run out.

Buschwick, there's no calves. I'm running to the J.D. We have fucking spanish.D. Bushwick. Way to fuck you, ladies. Bushwick. Is that good or bad? I just moved there a couple days ago, and so far, people are dying on the trains. Is it a good wick or a bad wick?

That was so good on so many levels. I mean, you should fucking, that was a bomb, and Mike just nervously left. She didn't know any better. You've never seen this in a vase. We don't laugh at everybody jokes. We don't laugh here. It's not really funny. If you had had parents you would have seen the Wizard of

Vos and recognized that that was a good one. My parents were alive when the Wizard of Vos was out. They just didn't take you. I'm not 50 like you. It wasn't in the theaters when I was a kid. Go wordier? I'm not 50 like you. I wasn't in the theaters when you were a kid and I wasn't and my parents are dead dead no wonder You don't like it. There's no place like home. You have like no home. Oh shit. I make money. I'm Lewis Gomez Lewis Jagger. I'm a cool. They called you Louis on a MLC Yeah, they did call you Louis that was MLC Misery Loves Company he we're just to catch you up here My man Jason over here JJ becoming a up here. Um, my man Jason, over here, J.J.

Becoming a woman. No, no, no. Becoming affected. I tell you this, if you shaved, if anybody in the room was going to become a woman, it would be him. Because underneath the beard and stuff like that, he has a very gentle woman face. Like a very, really?

Yeah. I think it'd be a pretty cool wig one time. I'm a real woman, yeah. I don't know. You should have a horse like pro wrestler head But you have woman lips sexy lips Yeah, you got a mom's mabbly kind of look I'm mom's mabily yeah, whatever

Well, it makes people mobbly, you know, it's the bomb Dana if you bomb a joke that was a bomb That was a mispronounce it. Yeah, that was a mispronouncing. Yeah, but it was a joke that because she mispronounced it nobody like that I don't know easy and she just sat down. Oh really really that's what we're doing This is why my fucking problems with women in general Women as much as anyone I just care about the bomb Dan and I want it held up to a high status Yes, you can't just miss pronounce it and get a bomb down It was a joke. She didn't mispronounce a fucking sentence She mispronounce a joke and it didn't get a laugh why because of the mispronunciation is that why do you hate women? I don't hate women. You don't hate women love women You don't hate them really love ladies

Lewis has been hit and scratched and pissed on by 90 women. Yeah, yeah, anything's it's their fault No, I'm because I'm international woman's day I posted a thing saying that I've all these shit that evil evil shit that women have done to me And then I was like oh, but men are inherently privileged. And it was like, you know, I've been hit. I've been punched scratch called the Faggot. We have a different group. We have a different group than we had that day.

You haven't been hit by a woman. Oh, I can see you kick the balls. Don't know that. Wait. It's a stop. Stop. After eighth grade. What?

So after that. So that's the end of the hit by a girl. I have. I got to smack like a drunk person, but I wouldn't count it. is that count because you just an a bar and she was a smack and everything? No, the point is hit by a one that does count. I have even have even hit by one hit in the face multiple times. I think how what were you doing? I went I went to high-stay We tried to hold it. I was I was hooking up with a girl and then I went down in her kitchen to like get water

So they call it and then the roommate came home and the roommate didn't know who I was because the girl picked me up at a bar Right, and she's like, what are you doing? Yeah? Who are you? And I was like, uh, I'm no one and then I just kept in I would not answer any of her questions She's like she kept getting more and more angry She was in my face and she fucking slapped me in the face. Well, that's a little weird You're just a home and true a house. What's that? She thought you were robbing our house. Yeah, I was drunk It was fucking night. Yeah, that's not a fault. That You're just a homeroom in the house. What? What's that? She thought you were robbing our house. Yeah, I was drunk. It was fucking nice.

Yeah, but that's not a hurtful. That's your fault. Yeah, oh no, no. I was completely in my fault. And she slapped me. She slapped me five or six times. And I kept going, hit me harder. And then eventually she got scared.

And she just turned and ran out of the room. And called her brother. I'm scared now. That's your male privilege. Is that you can pretend to be a robber. And they'll run away from you. 20 years ago. It's pretty funny at the time. I i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i around a little bit. But yeah, Bobby, have you? Because I'm starting to think I'm a piece of shit, because 100% of the men I've

asked have been hit. I've never been hit by a woman. I was at one time a girl, but I was with a sexually perverted girl once, and she scratched me because she wanted brownies. I want brownies, like I'm going to get your brownies. Sounds like a thin guy. I go relax, you can get me brownies, you scratch my face. Bobby's like, I'm going to use that move.

And I was like, you mother fucker. And I tied up. I could wear those brownies. I tied up in the left ear. No, you did not. Yeah. For an hour. You're so mad.

Would you fuck up, Brownie? Yeah. Nothing dessert the group. No, I would not fuck the brownie. No, I've never been hit by a girl. Never. Never. In high school, kicked in the balls by some chick.

Just to be honest, you were really dick and you're like, I had guy friends who were kind of abusive to women back in junior high and not really high school because then I got sober. But I used to be the guy that walked the girl home all the time. I felt bad. I never believed, you know what I mean? I always felt like shit when I saw that happen,

like for the girl. I saw guy spitting their faces and they would fight and smack them back and I'd walk them home and make sure they got home all right. I never liked that shit. I never got into that. And the girl never hit me, because I never, I don't know, I never did anything to a chick further.

Hit me. You also five, six. Huh? Nothing. I'm five, eight fucking ass face. The fuck does that mean? What does height have to do with it? I was just saying, you hit a girl, didn't you?

No, I didn't. I said, I've been hit by girls. Never hit a girl. Never hit a girl. Look at me in the eyes. Don't look at you in the face. Please, because that fucking thing is still there. No, it's not.

It's fucking gone. It's a little swollen. In my memory it is. How many times have you been hit by a woman? I've been hit by almost every girl that I've ever encountered. What have they hit you for? Just being a dick.

Because they're bad people. I'm an example. I mean, my ex, she would just get me to argue and she'd fucking go to just punch me in the face over anything. She got that mad at you. She tried to punch you. Yeah. What did you do? Laugh? No. What'd you do? I'd fucking call her dumb con. I don't know. I don't remember. Did you shove? Why did she want to hate you? Because I'm kidding. Don't mean to push, but I'm being shoved. Anyways. I can't believe you've never been hit by a woman, Bob.

And now I've never been hit by a woman. I mean, I don't got a little. Your mom? No. Yeah, me, my mom's not. No, that fucking counts. Well, it doesn't. No, mom's not.

Yes, it does. Actually, the discipline, no, it's not discipline. Well, mom hits me, it fucking counts. Well, it does it. Hold on, yes it does. Actually, the discipline. No, it's not discipline. Well, mom hits me, it was difficult. That's a problem actually with people. You look at parents hitting children who are the most innocent creatures in the world. Buddy, listen, okay, it's fine.

But I wasn't an innocent creature. I was a fucking raving alcoholic, robbing people. So your mom was only hitting you when you rob people and we're drinking? I don't know, I can't see that. Probably not. I mean't say that probably not I Probably you're asking me your four right? I like it. I got I got as early as you could remember right? Yeah But I got your mom your mom fuck that. Well, stop fucking forcing me down a path you fucking

Fucking hit you right now I'm saying that my mother My mom my father my stepfather did a, my mother didn't do any of that. My mother would give me a spank in a couple times, I remember doing some fucking stupid shit, but I was a little content at the time. But later in life I would get hit, but I got hit before that interim thing where I was a kid, I got hit by the guy. The man was the abuser, not my mother.

My mother would smack me if I asked nicely. Yeah, but I got hit by the fucking Billy Manchita, where fucking hit me. I mean punch me, close-fisted. Yeah, my mother would hit by the fucking Billy Manchin to when fucking hit me. I mean punch me, close fisted. Yeah, my mom would punch me close fisted. Yeah, my mom didn't do that. My mom would hit me with fucking blast jars. My mom punched me.

My mom punched me, knocked me the fucking to a hamper once when I came home shit-faced. That's not okay. That's not okay for me to be drinking the fucking tent. I know, but the reaction shouldn't be let me punch my kid in the face. Maybe that's why you're drinking a 10, because you had fucking people beating you up all the time.

Maybe, but the fact is, it was a different time they didn't know what to do back then. Now, we know we have a lot more information. No, but here's a funny part. Of what to be. 75% of people are still punching their kids in the fucking face. No, that's, you make that up. 75% of people. No, no, just trust you with a fucking percentage look it up

You first you said punch in somebody What is what is the what is the 70 75% of what 75% of people? Spanked their kids as young as what are you can see the young is 35% of children cry about getting punched all the time As of 2014 One second are you getting it 40% children cry about getting punched all the time. That was pretty funny. As of 2014. One second. Are you getting it? You're 40%.

In India, they just fucking drown the girls. That's China. Whatever. Why are you researching all the different ways that you're being killed? What do you have in these? I can't come around. 40%.

What does that mean? What does that mean? That you've been hit or nearly hit or? 40. 40. That's 75. 40. 40. At the 75 say they've been hit. I'm talking about look at the amount of parents that are smacking the kids the percentage.

I already have the pull up. It says 70% to 90% of parents hit or slap their children. Oh, Lewis is right. Lewis is right. Nobody else joined in. Lewis isn't wide. I don't hit my kid.

I tell you this, can I say this though? I hit your kid. I want to sometimes. Do you? Sometimes, dude, when he does some foul shit and you know he knows. He's three, you know anything foul. He bit my wife.

That's foul. He bit her as, fuck you, it's not foul. She loves it. Shit. You're gonna leave your bloody Lewis. That eye's gonna open right That's what you know Bobby. Bobby. I have to clean it up. Um, it's fucking bleeding eye horny tote over here.

The Lewis actually fell out of the chair by the way. You have a fucking say anything and I swear to God. Dude, would you almost fucking punch me? What'd I say about her? I don't know. He said she mentioned her boobs and I went, mmm, I was going to hit you right. You fucking this. I swear to God. I'll fucking hit you with this mic stand and the I'll never do a YKWD again. So this is how people in over-price housings behave. Oh, yeah Well, this says people with families and houses

Lewis is never family. He has a son That was me. I was gold. That was me. That was gotta be. That fucking hurt me. So I just pitch it fucking poor James looking this way and that way. I'm like, oh, mommy and Teddy. Um, that's not that nice talking to you. Was your mom drinking when she threw you in the hamper?

No, my mom doesn't drink. She wasn't drinking. She was a little pot. I remember that. But she wasn't out of the hall. She never had a problem. It was I had the problem. I was fucking drunk. I was a I was drinking a 10. If I had a problem, I'd solve it. Check out the hook by the DJ with all of it. If you're drinking a 10, you do realize that that really isn't your fault. You're not a fuck-up. Somebody else fucked up raising you because you're out drinking a 10. Yeah. Your kid's not going to drink a 10. No, you never know, man. Look at there's a lot of Westchester Westchester doing coke at 10 and you're absolutely right, dude

There's a heroin fucking crazy heroin problem in scars there right now Which is the best schools in the country because they can afford to buy the fucking drugs So that's where they go Almsford with the school. It's a four out of 10 There's not a drug problem because the kids can't afford to buy the drugs Yeah, and no matter what you do with your kid that problems come up they have anxiety schools Parents were we're super nice and sweet and a fucking lunatic. I can't stop blinking. I have cancer in my neck and dumb gay I made it the part about the gay with the rest is true Yeah, you can't you can't

Teach somebody to be who they are who their soul is first of all, yes, you can't teach somebody to be who they are, who their soul is. First of all, yes, you can. And soul is unreal. You're kid is mimicking you. You know what I mean? You know what I mean? You know what I mean?

People who grew up in a strict Irish Catholic home were gay and went and sucked cock and lost their family because they couldn't fight who they were. But that's not from upbringing. Yeah, but they tried to make them a boy. They tried to make them a boy they tried to make them a baseball playing girl loving husband soon to be you know and they were like one day just I'm out I'm I don't like baseball I like dresses I love disco and I'm fucking gonna suck I'm not sure I follow the point yeah but you're

saying that you can make somebody be something no I'm saying if your kids are fucking dick just in general you have to look at the parents and say, where did they fuck up? Being gay isn't being a dick. That's, they were either born gay or not. But it's having a dick. Suckin' a dick. Lickin' a dick.

Is this somebody giving the bar down, please? Just throw it right in this face, Mike. That's a good word. There's a lot of shitty kids though that their parents were like super sweet. Did you suck your little red-year-sfree rent-free? Why do you care? My sister's a piece of shit. kids though that their parents were like super sweet. You're so pretty. You're so pretty. You're so pretty. You're so pretty. You're so pretty.

You're so pretty. My sister's a piece of shit. I really? And we had the same parents and you know everyone loves both of our parents. Is your sister a piece of shit? She's getting better, but. What do you mean a piece of shit? Like how?

She was just, well she's a bad mother and she, you know, she like swears at the kids and shit. Really? Yeah, just fuck. What the fuck are you doing? You know, it's like a two-year-old. so I couldn't imagine it a fucking two-year-old Yeah, I guess you're right. I I stand corrected I guess no you got a kid got a bad friend the kid could just you go to school and just hangs out He just said 70 to 90 people send to the fucking parents hit their kids, which is abuse

Yeah, that's all right. I mean I'm not saying but our parents I'm saying that our parents didn't hit us and they've seriously now questioning in their 60s Whether they should have yeah, but there's also something that happened if your sister became Well, it doesn't bother it doesn't necessarily always I know I'm sorry to cut you off But you you say you your parents raised you how they're questioning they should at you no well They're thinking they should have hit my sister Because they didn't you they did not and then yeah, and then and I also I was not allowed to hit my sister no matter what she did So she would like you know, then she would ride me harder because she knew she wasn't gonna get Okay, now let me ask a question now you're saying oh, not like that you're fucking crazy

So you're saying that You shouldn't hit your kids. It's how you raised them and they raised you guys correctly didn't hit you But she still fucked up. She still fucked up. Yeah, but Lewis is saying your dad left, your dad was a gambling addict. He left. Yeah, there's maybe ways to fuck up your kids. I'm sure your family's terrible. Yeah, but you also have a great family. Just hit on your kids.

There's other, there's other things they can have and to fuck you up. You know what I'm saying? Like the parents related. And there's also like, you do get bullied. Like for example, like I don't hit my kid, but I'm going to send my kid into fucking school one day. And there's other parents that are beating the shit out

of their kids and then they come to school and they fuck up the little kids who aren't getting hit and can't take a punch. There's no, you know, there's no way to the boobies shoe boobies. Let's get back to second-training dicks. Well, I mean, I have no problem with that, but. But some things go wrong.

You're trying to do the best you can. Kids are going to have problems. Some kids don't have to do that. If your kid winds up being gay, would that bother you? No. If you wanted to be in the transsexual, would that bother you? Yeah. Why would that bother you?

I mean, it would bother me? Yeah, that would bother me. Why? Would it bother you that you didn't... You fucked up, maybe, a little bit? Because there's a really hard-fucked life being gay today, in my opinion, it's not hard. Like it was, we are very accepting of gay people. When we're celebrating gay people,

transgender people were trying to put them in that same category, but we don't. People are still like, people are still looking at them, like they're fucked up and weird. And you know, it's like, I would feel very, it would break my heart for him to have to not love who he is. Because if he was gay, I know he would love,

I he would love who he is because we would show him that type of love and acceptance. If he was transgendered, he would not be, like he would look at himself in the mirror and hate himself. If you're ever spoken to transgendered person about. I do. I barely J is one of the most level-headed human beings I know.

Yeah, and her husband too. And she's doing porn and fucking on camera. Forget the transgender, just that alone. I go, all right, something happened where's doing porn and fucking on camera forget the transgender just that alone I go alright something happened where she doesn't really fucking Is that bad to do using your sexuality to make money? Yes, is that that why is that bad? You're a fucking your a hocker. I don't know what you want me to say dude I know man. I'm saying why is that bad to you? I mean for somebody to use sexuality to make money as a business if someone's gonna pay what you want to do

What you about if my kid was doing porn? I'd be I'd feel like I failed as a man You're fight your fighters are like prostitute center using their body to make money on camera It's in it's a sport. It's a little different. Well fucking's a sport if you do it right? Yeah She got you how are you fucking these days Lewis? What happened yeah, what happened to you? I don't know. Why are you staying at me? Why are you staying at me with the death stick? I mean, no, you can't say that being a fight. And by the way, if you're a person who wants to get into a cage and fist fight people, but that's something happened in your life really, really, a little

far. Exactly. That was him with porn. Can't you admit that they're very similar? That both things, if we're going to say a pro someone that's a porn it's just a horror crazy which I don't completely disagree with I think that's a strange abnormal way to make a living if you're willing to get your face fucking punched in and your fucking neck broken in a ring that's caged but it's poor enough sport that's they're both fucked up ways for you to go one's way more fun I think I think it's looking what is fucking on camera is more fucked up What involved in a violent sport?

You can get your face bashed in and down Football football is way more violent sport There's more and there's more deaths than MMA So that if you really want to break it down Or you just can't Listen Listen, have a conversation Don't fight

This millions people play football this very few Playing MM. No way Fucking listen to me sexuality to you is different than sexuality to somebody else someone who is in porn Maybe sex is not a bad thing Max does Max porn you don't think you failed his parent no max if Max was in Maybe, you don't think you failed his parent? No. If Max was in the court,

if he's in the court, I'll have a little happy. Let me get to the court. Don't try to bully me down, you fucking path. Let me answer your fucking question. If Max decided to do porn, and he said, dad, I am okay with sex. I like sex, and I really enjoy it,

and I wanna go and make money, and I'm gonna be safe, and I wanna do porn because I like to do it, and I want to go and make money and I'm going to be safe and I want to do porn because I like to do it and I'm good at it and I make a lot of money at it. I would be like if that's what you want to do, go ahead, do it. You don't think comedy was not as dirty as porn, but to my parents who are all blue collar, you have a business, you work, you get a house, house nine to five when I said I want to do a comedy set Like what do you a fucking idiot? You're never gonna make it. That's horseshit. That's stupid work And now now but I I didn't listen to you trying to put comedy in the same

I'm not I'm saying I'm saying that what I Wanted to do what I wanted to do what I wanted to do was what I wanted to do What's what if I wanted to do what I wanted to do was what I wanted to do And I'm not gonna let somebody bully a muscle me out of it And if my son wants to is fine with his sex if he's doing it because he's fucked up Are he's doing if drug addict nobody is doing porn that isn't fucked up? That's crazy. I'm I'm not a drug addict. I interviewed porn source I'm not a drug addict. She is married

Do you only the only the only sex that she has with a man is with a husband The other sex is with other transgeneral women and it's all done in a professional with a hundred Billy J is completely normal. She's a fucking transgendered porn star. You're right, dude I'm fucking crazy here. She's not fucked up at all, dude She's completely normal and even cute. I think we're all fucked up. I think if you talk to me Yeah, I know in this point if I've dude meant that I'm fucked up You're gonna tell me that Billy J is a little fucked up. we're all fucked up. I think if you talk to me. Yeah, I know in this point if I've do admit that I'm fucked up You're gonna tell me that belly J's a little fucked up. We're all fucked up No, we know all fucked up. There's plenty of people that are well enough

I go to nine and five jobs. Oh, there's a fucking You know that they have fucked up. There's no such thing as fucked up. There is what we accept this You're not fucked up. I accept you. It's what you can't do if you're fucking up society You're fucked up if you're a killer. You're killing people you fucked up But if you're just doing stuff and we go, it's fine. I've interviewed plenty of porn stories. There's no flakes. Maybe we're all snowflakes.

There's never been a single porn show that I suppose that was a gaiist thing that's been said. I said I was fucking, guys, dick. That was a joke. That was a snowflake. I take that as wage. When I interviewed what's her name, the fucking, the, you know, the, the milf porn star, the most famous one.

Oh, Lee, a genie. No, no, no, no, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, Lee, the, you know, the, the, the Milf porn star, the most famous Oh, Lee and I don't know Lisa and Lisa and when I reviewed it is Lisa and she's, she broke it down. She was like, look, I've been in porn for a long time. I'm one of the most successful porn. So yeah, she was like, I've never met somebody in porn who didn't have something fucked up happening their childhood, who wouldn't admit flat out, hey, I had a fucked up upbringing. That's true. Every comedy. That's true, every comedy Every one comedy He just said he wasn't He was, his fucking was sister He just told me his first call

I'm a decent person though, my sister is shitty to people Alright, this is going to seem like a sidebar, but I was talking about this I was talking to my girlfriend about this today This is a psychological experiment They taught monkeys what money was They gave money to monkeys And the first thing they did was they paid for sex and women started collecting money. I need to stop for one.

There's something wrong with you. Okay, you turn the cameras up. I don't want to get seen laughing. That was bullet. I don't condone it. Give the camera me. I don't condone it. I did not laugh at it. He smiles because I love sunlight and unicorns. The monkeys did prostitution. The monkeys got into prostitution immediately.

That's the first thing they do. The men got all their money. Went to the women to fuck them. And the women were happy. It's the oldest profession. I think we're missing the point of this, which is we can pay monkeys to fuck them now No, did you already say that? I thought it was funny, but I didn't get it. We could fuck it said buy in

I'm gonna get there again. We could buy monkey prostutes And it's fair because we're paying them, you know, and then those pick houses. I like it better with the cuteness Can you admit Lewis that? MMA fighting is more danger it's almost more fucked than pork is more danger You can get your fucking head broken Kevin Neelan here, but I'm afraid to a people who do porn. I'm not saying that they're bad No, I'm just saying it's if you if my kid I put in my With my my kid did porn I would feel like I

fucked up because he needs some sort of attention he needs some sort of sexual graduation public with just I agree I agree with you but just aside know I do think MMA fighting is just as fucked up something went wrong there because you don't value yourself that I know and I interview fighters every week on my show yes most of the audience they were I think comedians if look, I even said this on the last show, if I had my father, Larry, who's been there for the last 30 years, if he was my

dad from the beginning, right? Hang on a second. If he was my dad from the beginning, I probably wouldn't have done comedy because I would have been well-adjusted. You wouldn't have needed the attention. The fucking fucked up shit through me down this path. I disagree with Congress. I disagree with Congress. Because just listen to me, you fuck. All right, just with your dumb face. She's just fucking heavy jumping.

Come on, just go. Cheeks are so much wider than your head. It's been an inch. He fucking crazy. Like right here? Yes, it goes like this and then straight out. It's wild. It's a wild scene. Comedy, I disagree completely.

Because first of all, I don't not value myself. We're, like if you're in porn or fighting, you're not valuing yourself enough. I agree. And then comedy, everyone has made somebody laugh. They know the feeling. Every person on earth at some point is made. Wow, that's Goppa.

Nailed it. But that feeling of me, I want to parlay that feeling. It is the greatest feeling to make a group of people laugh. If you're here, it's the office. So wanting to parlay that does not mean you're fucked up. I like the way it feels when I make people laugh. You're describing sex. You're describing sex. Yeah, you're fucked up I like the way it feels when I make people laugh you're just got sex you're just going sex I you're describing sex no no

You're describing But you don't have to fuck on camera for money sex could be the same as I'm saying gratifying by watching porn and people come they feel great But and they're gratified like fuck Where are the porn stars that are going? Oh, I didn't have a fucked up childhood my uncle didn't touch me That is what the fuck happens and that's why these are getting in the Fuck Tell me name a comic that wasn a fucked up childhood. My uncle didn't touch me. That is what the fuck happens. And that's why these girls are getting into fucking so much.

Where the comics that don't have a fuck, tell me name a comic that wasn't fucked up. Name a comic that doesn't talk about a fantasy. I don't know if you are fucked up and you see a therapist, that's not the same thing as being fucked up and fucking on camera for money. If you're looking for your, the gratification by prostituting yourself

for money on camera, it's a little fucked up dude. I mean, it's not a normal thing. And if you, it's not a normal thing and if you're not a normal thing I don't believe you that you wouldn't care that Max would do that I if Max said to me dad I am I'm not doing drugs. I'm not a fucking idiot. I want to do this You're three what if you had a daughter you'd feel I'm fucking I just don't buy into this comics tortured thing I feel 100% awful. Oh, that's a war. It's fucking slacked out. Fuck it, thanks. It's fucking me.

I just don't fucking straighten it around. I just don't find it in this comic's tortured thing. I had a good upbringing. My dad probably didn't hug me enough, I guess, so maybe. But I just liked it. It's fun to tell jokes. If I'm joking around, we're doing that right now. But you think we're all fucking slacking?

We're doing it to the discussion with gratification with comedy. Like, when you do it, and especially in the beginning, because it's not fun in the beginning, it's a really hard thing to do in the beginning. It is fun when you do well on stage. Yeah, but in the beginning you don't read it though that. But to that but what you're saying though. But to what I make money and I do well on stage. No, but to what you're saying is I think it'd be great to live in a world where prostitutes could be like, look, I can separate. I can do. I can can use my body You know what they do that they do that and I am should am right right?

I went to the fucking money ranch money ranch prostitution is separate. It's not a big deal We're not a fucking big deal. Yeah, all of those girls were pretty fucked up and it was legal and that was the most normal Fuck up all those roles are fucked up different than, because you're not displaying it for thousands of people. But they're just doing TV credits. Point is better, you're fucking one guy, not nine. But you're fucking a hot dude with a big dick, not a chubby guy with a fucking six- And fucks it up. And those girls are fucking basically raped on camera all the time.

In fact, the shelf life for most girls in porn is like two movies since months. The way you're talking about him, it gives no respect to these women. I don't respect them. I don't respect them. Well, there it is. I don't respect them. I'm sorry, a person is spreading their legs on camera for money. I don't have a ton of respect for what we're listening.

In the 21st century, prostitution occurs across cultures and political systems. Are you fucking NPR? So, so, the originator of the phrase, the world's oldest profession. Do you have any more facts that will fucking bring us to a fucking amazing debate? No, it's not just profession. Yeah, we know that. We're not, we're comics.

We all had a fucking war joke in the party. For porn, they're dumb fucking people for the most part. They're stupid people. You listen to their interviews and she, but they get to make this money and they get to live in a house and drive a car that they wouldn't have otherwise. They could not have a job that they make that money. No, they could have a job, but they'd have a normal fucking job.

But they wouldn't make the money, though. Briollson is bitching about fucking how now she can't go out with everyone calling her horse. I used to make $30,000 to $60,000 a month, and I don't want to do that anymore. It's like, well, too fucking late, it's the internet. You reap the benefits of it. Now you got a fucking beautiful house. She still has an Amazon like a gift section where she saw as her fans going buy her gifts every fucking day. That's the

price of fame across the board. It's not the price of fame across the board. You think hot head is walking around happy to be bothered by every person that sees no but he paid that price first. Yeah dude fan your fans by you shit. And it goes on when they buy you a fucking hat. They're fucking giving you money But nothing no, it's not it's for you pussy man. You show and you pussy. Now where do you put strippers? Where do strippers fall on this? It's all the same category. I mean by the way, I'm friends with strippers prostitutes I don't think you don't respect them. How can you be friends with somebody who don't respect? I'm friends with Scopo My girlfriend is best friend. Yeah, I love Lewis You don't respect them. How can you be friends with somebody you don't I'm friends with scopo my girlfriend and You guys consider strippers sex workers

I know yeah, okay, I didn't of course really my girlfriend was pissed. I got a lab dance. She was furious She's like yeah, you got you got a sex worker on your lap. I'm like that's not a sex worker Yeah, no, yeah, this girl's showing a fucking You get a heart on a fucking nickel. It's not a really it's a chubby, but it's not like a United United I really can't come at it. It's just a close a terrible. Yeah, they just tell you go there and you see some chick Media not even dancing good. Oh fucking spinning around and that she slowly takes her shit off and the round Which gets the point that she starts putting her shit and everybody's face does nothing for you and you're throwing fucking stinks. Why do we have to pretend like we hear something we have that we live in a culture no sorry I'm speaking I know but I know I know it's listening. Well he's in I'm going to

know we have to pretend that oh you know prostitutes and hookers oh we have their completely as normal as librarians and lawyers. We're not we're not saying that but Librarians and fucking lawyers are fucked up. I know I know I know What are we gonna argue with? They're open touch by the market. See that's your problem as you say you you you swap them with the fucking brush I'm not saying all them but some of them are swap with brushes. Yeah, you do that's my swap I made it up. It's a fucking word That's my swap. I made it up. It's a fucking word.

It doesn't matter. It could be madly depending on where you're from. I say this too. No, it's not mad. Here's the deal. I had this talk with Patrice once. He actually told me this. He goes, let me tell you.

He passed away. The dirty, his hands right there. The dirtiest girls. You guys can buy it for $49,000. The dirtiest girls in the fucking world are lawyers. And like Australians. And no, he said like doctors dancers stuff like that women who have been just studying studying studying and then when they get older

and they fucking want a fuck they're not dirty 30 40 yeah but they're not dirty multiple diseases they all have herpes they all have HPV they all have HP's got all of that that is the stuff all them do you have it no I don't I thought I had a told me Belle you oh yeah he got a false positive No two months in my life at that time. No, no, no, no, wait, stop listening to me. Listen to me, you go in for a long time. Why did you go in for the, what did you go in for the, what did you go in for the AIDS test?

I just went in for a regular checkup and they're like, you do you want an AIDS test and I said no. And then they, I was like, well, why, they said everyone should have one. You should just take one. You look like you have AIDS. You look like you could be sick. I would, I would, I would,

so, so, so, so you go going to take it when I'm with you. So, well, I, they, they want to do the blood. They prick your finger and they do the blood. It's like 99.9 something percent of it. Yeah. And I was like, I had a bartender that night and I was like, I didn't want to go with a fucking, you know, a bloody,

a bloody, a bloody, a bloody, into somebody's drink. To an East Village bar, well, or get AIDS because I have an open wound at a, you know, like filthy bar that doesn't wash glasses. Too bad jokes. So, I was going to rip this in half. So, I'm going to put it, AIDS because I have an open wound at a you know like filthy bar that doesn't wash glasses bad jokes back I was gonna rip this in half

So I'm gonna put it on a velcro down the middle of this fucking thing So they wanted to do the so I did a saliva test. That's only 99% accurate right? So then yeah, they put me in a room and another guy in another room and then they like ran in he was gone Like they didn't even shut the door and then they came into mind and shut the door And she was like She's, do you see this? She had her back to me. She wouldn't even face me. I think you see this, at least this line. And I was like, yeah. And she goes, you see this other line? And I was like, pregnant? I go, I go, okay. And then, and then in my head, I was like, is this how, is this how it happens?

Is this how people are told? And then she goes, yeah, you're, you tested positive for HIV. I would start getting pregnant. I grabbed my hat. I was just, I started you're you tested positive for HIV. I would start. I grabbed my hat. I was just I started young mother fucker, mother fucker. And I was like, think it, but I was in a relationship with a girl at the time. Yeah. And I knew that I hadn't done anything. So I'm like, and I was pretty sure she hadn't, but still, and then they don't let you

leave the hospital. They brought like a specialist down again, named Angel, and they, uh, which that's the high you want to take for the ice cold. That's what our health care system is at. That's what we're doing at. So they, and then they shut the door to the table. Wearing like a hood and with a reaper, fuck. No, you look like a standard Mexican. Jesus.

But yeah, they shut me in the row with him. And then you retake it and you have to take, and then they take a lot of blood from you and they send it to Albany, so you're in like the state records, they know who the AIDS people are. And then, but then- That's how you got the apartment.

They do have AIDS housing. He'll be out here in six months. But yeah, then you have to retake the test. And so we did blood and then you just watch it. It was 20 minutes, and you just watch it tick down. And we're waiting. And then I was making, oh, then that's when I found out for sure that I was in Atheist,

because I was pretty sure. And then as I was sitting in the chair, I was like, starting like negotiating with myself, like, all right, if I don't have AIDS, then like God, I'll do good things, and then I started laughing, I was like, I'd rather have the AIDS, I swear to God, I was like, fuck it, I'll take the AIDS, I don't believe in that. Wait, but you said two months of your life. Well, so, yeah, so they do the rap and test again, but then the one they send to Albany is like, well, Angel Kogel got a rapido test.

They put into a centrifuge or whatever, and that's the one that's, that they, I'm gonna, I got a couple giggles. I got a rapido, I got a couple giggles. I was clearing my throat. I got a couple giggles. Rapido. By the way, you're fucking comic scale is off.

If you tell a joke to 10 people and you get a couple giggles. Yeah, that's a bomb You're fucking asshole. Yeah, no not to him Two giggles wasn't a bomb Yeah, two giggles and six stairs That's a bomb did the rapid test say you were positive also the rabbit test said it was fine So you were negative that yeah the rabbit test said negative. The second, whatever, the blood one. And then I was even a joke to this guy, Angel, too. I was like, I go, well, the saliva test would that be positive, maybe, if I made out with

the girl that had full blown AIDS right before the test. And he goes, he goes, now that wouldn't affect the test. And I was like, also, I was joking. I didn't make out with the girl that had full blown AIDS. Visibly, in the fucking Bellevue waiting room here. And then he goes, he goes, that's really funny. I'm just not used to people making jokes in the situation. So yeah, so they let me go and then I had to use condoms.

And then, oh, and then I was going to San Francisco, the AIDS capital of the world. This is all true. Is it? Well, I don't know if that's true, but I don't think it is. I assume it is. But I was staying with my- The Congo. I was staying with my gay friend in San Francisco

and two weeks later, when the test came back and they told me they would give me the results over the phone And then the same fucking woman that wouldn't face me called me and she already has a shaky voice like Yeah, you have to you have to come back in and I was like you told me you would give me the answer You have to tell me right now. She's like well There was a problem with your test and I was like all right fuck I have AIDS like that's that's And so then and then I flew back and then it was like another two weeks before I got there. So that's a full month at this point.

And I go and I go to the doctor, the fucking problem they had with the test. They lost the fucking test. Was the problem. She's she fucking didn't tell me that that was the problem. They could have gone, oh, we lost your test. And I went, oh, okay, she goes, we had a fucking problem with your test. So for another two four weeks, I was I was like oh the problem of the test means So yeah, you sue them I

Well, I did I met with the head of the AIDS clinic at Bellevue finally at the end of the two months and He but I I fucking I was I was yelling at him and he was apologetic and I was like I you know this woman shouldn't lose her job But she shouldn't have the job of telling people they have fucking AIDS. She should be what he said I'm and he said he would you know to look into it and should that's how Rachel I seen got into common she told me it eight in a gram of voice oh you have a sunny haha wait do you do that in your act let me tell that story

I'm so that sounds fun that's's fucking funny, it's crazy. Hey, so when you found out you didn't have AIDS, I mean, what was that feeling like? Ripping that condom off and just plunging in your girl? The angel, when I had the first one, he goes off the record because the other woman left the room. He's like off the record, he's like, I do this all the time, he's like, you don't have AIDS. He's like, the first test, he's like,

I don't think this line meant anything. He's like, this second one is like solid, double negative, whatever it is. And he knew he didn't have it. So he was, he was pretty confident. He goes, he goes, he goes, he goes, use a condom. Don't risk spreading this. And then I went to my girlfriend too.

And I was like, did you do anything? I have a clean conscience. And she said she hadn't fooled around. And we both had AIDS tested at the beginning in the relationship. So I was, what move? Getting AIDS tests together at the beginning of the relationship? Yeah, before we moved it You just yelled at everyone for being disgusting And you're like wait you test now dude, I just but no who that's like it like in the after school specials

They tell you go specials they tell you go adult fuck never done I know you don't because you're a fuck you've got an a test with a girl I've got a before you guys had sex me and don't got a test that we didn't hold hold hands and get it done we went separately to our doctor and then one and then when she we were having a baby we got a test again we got because I didn't want to give anything to a child and I only fuck virgins Yeah, or you just go give blood. That's what I would do I'm not saying that I haven't had I'm saying I've never gone with a girl before before we had sex

I'm kidding. I didn't do that She fucking blew me on a rock I thought I definitely had it still I was like I'm giving this bitch AIDS right now. No, yeah, I don't know. No. Those ones. Oh, thank you.

Well, I'm glad you don't have AIDS, dude. But even though that would have been a better story, if you found it, you didn't have it, and then you found out you did had it like three months later, like he was, Angel was a fucking idiot. Well, when they did say that too, I went through my head, like how many people in the history of AIDS have ever been told you have AIDS, and then they're like, just kidding, you don't really have AIDS. con volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca, espectacularismos, sus momentos rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras desesperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de madrida, murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros.

Volotea. Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. ¿O fue? ¿No? ¿No? ¿No? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no in the ER for five years. Right. Yeah, so we had a lady come in and our blood tests came back and shit.

And the doctor was like, it was like clearly she had AIDS. And I've been asked with you this day, we kind of think she knew, but we were like, you know, you have AIDS, this is what's going on. And she was like, you can't tell, she was with somebody. So how did you know, would you pick up a piece of paper that said AIDS? No, no, there's like a, we do labs. You do labs. I'm not sure they doctor new and i think patient satisfaction

so it was like i had to go in there with the doctor and the doctor was explaining and i'm telling them what's the unsatisfied i talk but the the the kicker the story is that she was with a guy who she was like you can't tell him and it's the law that you can't tell this guy that she's fucking why uh... the law that i can't tell this guy that she's fucking why The law I told him I mean I told him the doctor was the doctor was like yeah, you know by law We can't and he's like but we can hint and I just pulled the guy aside and I was like hey man

You know you guys you just get tested blah blah blah blah and I can go to jail probably I don't know I can probably chop this is Long time ago and he was like and turns out you do a very subtle I just told I was like hey man like this bitch got eight. She had something that might be you know whatever And we just kind of talk and he was like someone to push it will kill you your moniker you got a deal. Yeah, yeah Fucked up. I'm so really fucked up. And then he She we think that she knew but she was just trying to like not pretend it didn't exist But I got tested as negative. See, it's all fine. Right, like that.

Have you ever had something as a woman? No. As a man, though. You tie, you disinfection, that's it. You know that crabs or anything? It's 2016, now we get crabs. Gay people feel it. Why don't you get crabs?

They say we don't we shave. There's no bush anymore. I don't. Wait, who? Gay people get, I have a gay friend who got crabs from an other man. Other crabs still exist. We don't we shave there's no bush anymore I don't wait who? Gate people get I have a girlfriend who got crabs from an other man. I think crabs still exist I don't think they're bedbugs. Yeah, that's the biggest is true. They're bedbugs right what crabs of bedbugs I'd rather get aids that that's true. I would do it. I'm like 90% sure it's like like one level off

But it's like why they're all the same thing. I got crabs twice That but not bedbugs. You don't even have any hair. Back in, not there, it looks like fucking, Lewis's chest. Did you shave it? No, it's not that hairy. I got crabs once.

It was terrible too. I got a red head chick. I fucked her on a jungle gym. I got hurt. I got hurt. some redhead chick. I fucked on a jungle gym And Like a nice I got her for the next the next day. I fuck I knew I had him Maybe this something with jungle. I got herpes on a jungle gym. I think the something was fucking a jungle You any any girl will fuck you any girl that will fuck you in my pubes touch her pubes and that's how I got him And then she told me she had him I really jump off dude. You can see him. That's fucking Little what she found out.

Dude, I thought I had, she had to know because I knew immediately. I got, when I got my dog, I didn't, like I didn't realize you could be allergic to certain types of dogs. Dude, fuck your dog. I fucking got crashed from my dog, bro. Please. No, I didn't realize, like, I have a wired hair jack Russell. So I'm allergic to him and I didn't know that. So I got him and within a couple weeks I started getting hives and I had never had hives in my life. So these little bumps

on my body. We call them HIV's. And I'm looking it up online and fucking Scabies came up. Like the only thing that I can compare to it, I thought I had Scabies. So for like months, I got Scabies. I got Scabies. You are just gross. I got skabies from a fancy hotel. I was in the junk. I'm a Four-star fucking hotel. I'm not gonna rat him out, but I From the sheets you should what that why wouldn't you don't stay at this hotel? What do you have a fucking? Yeah? No, no, cuz I be in real-ass dude Haven't a while ago. I don't even know if it would fucking matter now. But here's a deal. I got a-

We have the kind of listeners that stay in hotels, to be honest. It was a motel six. And it was a five, it was a four-star hotel. Really fancy hotel. What are they not? And their sheets properly. I don't. It could have been from the maid.

It could have been from who it was handling the linen. There was a thing on top of it. It was the one where they had like secret cameras and they were showing the maids not actually wash it They would like just take the sheets take them off put them back on yeah, they put the whole fucking thing on it Like yeah, I mean if the person who stayed at the night before had some scabes or whatever and they just left the sheets on I'm fucked yeah, yeah That's why you should always when you go to an hotel room have them change the fucking back

Yeah, when you get there just get there and go look. I want brand new sheets on here when I go July Just go when I go to end the thing was undoneone oh I know you do you come on it and then say this come on my bed my sister used to work at the at the Sheridan and someone called with the book out of the borgada and someone called there was shit on the phone in the bathroom like someone put shit on the phone and they upgraded her the airy asses. Upgraded her. They upgraded the person to like the highest suite at the Borgata. So it was like, hey, you want to get a next room with the Borgata for free?

Just put shit on the phone. I'm going to do that. I used to do this all the time. I used to do this all the time. Burger King in my neighborhood just to beat for shits and giggles. We take a candy ball. You used to work there?

Hey, I've got money, and I get laughs, and I'm all good, dad. I used to take a candy bar, and we'd rub it all over the toilet seat like on the walls and just watch the employees have to go in and clean it. We watched a dude quit his job, but he was like, no dude, I'm not doing it. I almost quit the Angela subs because the dude I worked with had a Colossomy bag. And he went in there and he fucking exploded. And he quit. He quit, he went in there and he fucking exploded. And he quit. He quit.

He went up. He goes, I'm out. I go, why? He goes, I'm out. He goes, I'm out. He goes, I go, I stop. You get a fucking bio and whatever the fuck. And he just quit.

Rather than cleaning it up, he was like, I'm out. And then the dude was like, you have to clean that. I go, no, you fuck. You either, you make these subs. Oh, fucking, you clean that up., you make these subs, oh fuck, and you clean that up, fuck you, and I had the boss, I actually had him in a corner, I had him clean it up, he was in the, I remember he was puking, terrible.

Dude, I'm gonna put shit on the phone in my hotel, I swear, I'm gonna see if he's a great, you're sicker's bar, use your own game. You never got it, you've had diseases, what have you had? No, I never had diseases. I swear to God, I would tell you, I've saved you, you're dick, you're dick, you've had diseases, what have you had? No, I never had disease. Stop it. I swear to God, I would tell you, I've saved it.

You had a dick as big as I thought. You had eye surgery three days ago. Is the date of a war on your penis? No, I had a bump on my penis that I thought was a war. But what did you do with that? I was a doctor, this was very recently. I was like, what the fuck is this? It was like, now you should get bumps as you get older.

I thought I was like, what? What? You know what? He's like, you know what? He's had his head this award, but I fuck him That is not a real-ass doctor Dicbump Dicbump

It was a guy named danger I dick yeah, I got dickbump No, I swear to God, I went in and I was like I was like I was like a guy named angel I was like what the fuck is this and I was like I was like a house to the war what the fuck is this yeah I swear to God Yo bro dickbump get out of here And no, the doctor, I swear not. You broke the dick bump. Get out of here. No, the documentary. I swear I got nine dick bump.

You see my dick bump? Even though his dick has dick. All right, well give it to me. Give it a bend, Dan. You have it, you have it. You fucking dick bump. Write it down. That's the name of the show. Erie said.

Wow. Bobby, when did you get Ninja Turtle head? Well, I pull up a Ninja Turtle head. We got it. I know. Why do we need to do illustration? It's gonna be funny. It's gonna fast his bitches on that.

It's gonna be funny. That's fucking funny dude. We thought we had bedbugs in Burlington that time Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because you guys had a bedbugs scare so then all night he's wrestling around and I've never slept better I check fucking beds every time I go to a hotel I ripped that corner sheet up up in the corner by the wood and if there's any That's pretty good Can you just wrap this around your eyes just for just for a Picture you guys should sell bomb dana's on merch on the website

So you throw my pretty good That's both on camera. Yeah, we have cameras. That's fucking funny Anyways, you look like that. He loves pizza. He's a fucking interterd I always take a little break right now. I'm gonna do a read. Can I say it because this we're talking about this for real break? My doctor told me because I was sure that I had a fucking wart. He was like wash your hands before you go to the bathroom because if you shake hands with somebody that has HPV and you touch your dick before you pay, that's the number one way that it gets

spread. Yeah, wash your hands before. go to bed. That's how I got it. Is that why I handle it? How we made Delphis bumps all the time? It's got a HPV. All right, you ready for this? You guys can take a P if you want. Just take your, or check it out. Whether you're a golf, golf's biggest fan,

or you're just ready to try a new fantasy sport, you can play one week fantasy golf for free. Every week at draft draftkins.com. Just pick six golfers before the tournament tees off, stand at the salary cap and rack up the points for streaks, per hole, performance, tournament finishes, and more. Outscore the competition and you could win.

Only at draft Kings, they're the ones that bring you the excitement of golf to this level. With every monster drive and every putt made, they bring you closer to victory. And draft kings, they offer way more than just fantasy golf. Choose from a variety of sports. The showcase, your winning skills. You can do baseball. You can do soccer.

Even mixed martial arts is there now, which is pretty impressive. You can do draft kings martial, a fantasy sport. Isn't that crazy? I love that. Millions of sports fans, just like you have already discovered draft Kings. Now it's your turn to get in the action. For free, this is fantasy as usual. This is draft Kings.

Fantasy golf contest begin when tournament tees off. So hurry to draft Kings.com now Choose your golfer and be sure to use promo code Kelly to play for free. That's promo code Kelly to play for free Now only at draft Kings.com that's draft Kings.com Anyways, all right. Well, that was pretty fucking heated shit to be honest with you I All right, well that was pretty fucking heated shit to be honest with you I disagree with Lewis, but that's fine. I think that I Understand what you're saying and I think about the porn stuff But I think there are some point stars that are okay and that move on now they're fine people

I'm just saying to typically they had something fucked up in their childhood to make them want a fucking camera for money Yeah, and you don't respect them. I don't really respect a life choice. No Would you data points? I couldn't seriously date one. I mean could I date my casually sure? Yeah, I tried I tried to date Lisa and really yeah, why I don't know that would be kind of a fun story what happened We were supposed to hang out a couple times and just never materialized. Really? Yeah. Why? What was it you were? It was her. She blew you off. She didn't blow me off. We were supposed to hang out and just did a materialize. She wrote a materialize. All right, fucking governor Gomez. You got blew off. Stopped. Well, she went on a book tour. Yeah. And then that was it. You're like, that's it. No books. I don't do. I don't like that. Speak, speak, read, and write, and then that was it you're like that's it no books. I don't like

Spissby Reed and writing listen what what happened? Nothing happened. She blew she blew off who did it didn't materialize Bobby Sorry, don't worry buddy. Let's go to chat room real quick. What do you got? Yes, your King Kami says this podcast is giving me aids How so I think it's difficult to get it that way. Give me this scarf. Yeah, I know. I love that they always try to be mean and fun. This thing is, this is shut the fuck up. He also asks if Jason is the guy rich of us

kicked in the ribs? Yes. Yes. Nine years ago. I didn't know People knew that. That was a good friend. Was that a party? Yeah, that was a party.

That was a... Chris, Caroline's Christmas party. Caroline's Christmas party. You a drunk? Oh, yeah. When you were drinking, don't drink anymore, right? No, I drink. You still drink?

Oops. Just not a run rich voice. I was a wife. And he said some stupid shit and then he kicked you right in the fucking gut, right? He said his daughters and his wife were hot. It was partly my fault because I was holding Richard's arms. I feel like he might have not got punched in the roof.

I didn't say his wife was just a daughter of a sass. Okay, that's worse. Maybe for parents, BU wouldn't be saying shit like that. It started at DePaul's Cookout where everyone's ball busting and I was continuing in that. No, it's not Dr. Dave. Sorry. Yeah, it just started with ball busting at DePaul's Cookout and then that was in September or whatever and uh... but was uh... no it's not dr. Dave sorry yet just started with ball-busting at the policy out and then that was in

september or whatever and then uh... the carat the christmas party rolled around in December and i thought we were still doing that ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha he broke his ribs. Yeah, well, I mean look man, you talk about somebody's kid. Well, I was talking about the adult daughter too, who, which he misunderstood and thought, was talking about his two-year-old child at the time or whatever. But that might have made a big difference that I was talking about. What's worse, trying to fuck the 20-year-old daughter? I feel like the kid is like, that's a gag. No one's fucking kid, but then it's like, the daughter, it's like, wait, that's real? Are you trying to really fuck my daughter? I mean, either way, if it's my, I mean, that's just something.

If you, if the comments are focused about you. If somebody out of a comedian that's kinda, you know, beneath you at the time, you know, you know, you were, you know, just, he's been paid $400 a month and right, you think that he got him above virtual loss in the industry? Whatever.

Somebody that, you know, you, that is, you know, maybe should respect you a little more as who you are in this business. And then he says some foul shit like that that you misinterpret or you do interpret the right way. You know, you might snap. I mean, I've wanted to fucking hurt people. You physically hurt me for making slight jokes about your wife. Yeah, I understand, boss. But the one that you said you would fight Jason was the one in the park with the kid. Remember that one.

Oh, yeah, we were at a Joe list fucking picnic. Oh, the worst. Some day with the balloon. There was a balloon. So this balloon goes, hang on, where's coach? You set this up. He goes, we're having a big picnic down the park. Come down. Yeah, I'm a hero in the story. There'll be a balloon.

He just find the balloon. Yeah, tell you dumb tail, Rafael. I'm the fucking hero in your story. The balloon was fucking a foot off the ground. That's funny. And I want to bring it all this fucking snacks. His fucking open micers, they have like a trisket between them.

I gotta share my grapes and cheese with these fucking savages. Oh fuck. I appreciate you coming. This is shit. This is pretty good. It's like three-year-old kid. He must have been around three. He was deaf. He was deaf.

Yeah. So tell me you didn't hit it. No, no, runs up to us. Canner grabs the kid. We don't know this person. It's just a fucking baby that runs up to us. The mom is like 10 feet behind him, because the baby's running away from her.

Canner picks up the kid. I mean, I don't even get what the joke was. I scooped him up. I said we were going to trade for him. It was funny. It was funny. She laughed at that. Look on this woman's face.

She thought this fucking psychopath was kidnapping her kid. First of all, if you want to talk about looks on the faces, we end up tying the balloon around her little kid's wrist. And then he's trying to get it off. Lewis, who Joe makes a joke about being Puerto Rican pulls a fucking knife out he's cutting the balloon and the mother was freaking out about that when one of the ball guys in the group grabbed the kid the other one pulls out a knife I get it why are you carrying around a knife I don't know have you seen where it lives I know I make money I do funny. I live in a great neighborhood listen. I

If I shot anybody if I shot anybody fucking go near max grab your kid pick your kid up I'm man if a man listen if I show you grab my kid you'd wake up literally a fucking you know AIDS I a fucking you know it's I would get it's fucking while you were knocked out give you a dude if you I mean that's like another well with you somebody grab is my fucking well there was a frail woman coming up to it wasn't you or you yeah if you can beat somebody up you can take that

kid I didn't know that was a rule sure dude I don't give a fuck of it's if it's like a gang of fucking muscular black guys in my neighborhood I'm gonna fucking get killed that day because you grab my kid, I'm gonna fucking grab a brick and I'm gonna hitch in the face with it. I'm really proud of you for saying black guys just then. Muscle is impressive. But he had muscular. He did have definition. A little silver line on the bottom back. I was I was walking out of a restaurant in Long Island City and some kid is running by screaming. Why did you

just turn into an old Jewish yanta? I was walking out of the restaurant. I long out in city. What happened to you? Kid runs out.anta? Yeah, I don't know. I was walking out of the restaurant. And long enough, I didn't sit in the long time ago. What happened to you? Kid runs out, he's screaming. I grabbed the kid, I picked him up because he's running from the mom. I go, I'm just trying to help him. I pick him, I go, you can't run from your mom, and I just hear, cut! And I was like, what? They were filming a movie where the kid was running away from the mother.

I had no idea. I picked up the kid, tried to bring him back. I ruined the whole scene. That fucking sucks on two levels. That you didn't even get a part in the movie that there's somewhere you live there. You go all the time and you can't even get in it, really? Did not put me in anything. I'm barely in this.

I have to bring pizza. What do you want? A part on piece 11 rock and roll. I will not if you unless you get it right. Piece of drugs and rock and roll. You. I couldn't even get a fucking audition. They were on my manager all the time.

I take it. What is it? Sex drugs and rock and roll. You're in. Great. He writes a blog about it. But what? He doesn't care for the program. He writes a blog about it But what he doesn't care for the program. We write a blog about it. Did you write? There was some fucking there was one guy that would write every week. I forget what blog was it almost got funny How much he ate it?

You called dr. Ted Yes, I'll call him. Thank you His name's not a problem. By the way, do you really have cancer Joe? Possibly let's get on the horn here and find out. He's not mouth can sore throat He doesn't have feces of sore throat for a fucking couple days. Thank you, Valor. 15 days dog And the only thing that's why do you think that's cancer one spot only when I swallow We also went to a pharmacist who made him thickiest cancer. I I hated that pharmacist speak up when he told you to hear us. Yes Hey, man. Hey buddy. You're on the my show again. I

Apologize did Joe's on the show again. He's fucking panic I lose go almost Lewis J Gomez who makes money and lives in a good neighborhood and is funny said hello Hello Lewis. Hey, what's up, Dr. Steve? How are you buddy funny, said hello. Hello, Lewis. Hey, what's up, Dr. Ceeve? How are you, buddy? Hey, first of all, Dr. Ceeve. Hey, I'd love to be on Lewis's MMA show. Yeah, okay. That was great to meet you. Yeah, that was great to meet you, man.

Stuff I knew absolutely nothing about. Well, I want to ask you first, what about dick bumps? Is this such thing as dick bumps? Yeah, absolutely. Do you get dick bumps as you get older they're called four dice spots they're basically ecotaphic sebaceous glands which means in anguish that they're oil glands they're growing where they shouldn't be and so you get these sort of white bumps and you get them on your scrotum or on your dick

or four dice so where we call it again dick bumps four dice spots f o r d y c e and almost everybody has Oh Dice, so what are we called again dick mobs Four dice spots F.O.R.D.Y.C.E. and almost everybody has Oh, fuck up Bob if you get down there and sort of strip I'm in the grocery store If you if you stretch out the skin of your scrotum and examine it, you'll see these little sort of off-white dots a lot of times for those are fortnite. And that's supposed to bleed, right? You can squeeze them and they, they'll come out, right? Yes, yeah, if you squeeze them hard enough, but there's no reason to, they're stable.

Oh, I can squeeze them? The way they are, you don't have to do so satisfying. You can squeeze them and it's almost like they're a little bit hard, right little zits Right I mean you you obviously have had these you fucking dick I'm sick bump. Don't call me sick. I'm sick bump. All right, listen, real question.

Joe is here, and he's fucking panicking and driving. Everybody in his life, insane with the throat cancer, okay? Well, I thought you were going to give him my number, and I could talk to him. I did. He called you, and you never picked up. Oh, I swear I didn't get a miss call from anybody, but anyway. I called it right. I called it again after, so we could talk. Did you mean? I'm I called it. We can talk. Did you say what you want, Joe? Say what you want.

Well, I got off the antibiotics. I took off the antibiotics because I didn't feel good after four days. And then you said it was absurd to be on the antibiotics. Everyone said it was absurd. But it hasn't gone away. It's been 16 days. Only hurts in one spot right side of my throat. Only when I swallow essentially occasionally hurts but i talk a little bit yeah so you have somebody

gave you antibiotics for this yes i took them for four days didn't feel better but you said it was absurd i get off it right but that means somebody must have looked in your throat certainly they wouldn't have given you an antibiotic without looking at the road uh... he looked quickly but it was like a city md walk-in bullshit he looked at my look at my ears he felt around

okay well uh... yeah i i'm still going by the uh... either post nasal griffing what's i do sleep on it would be that same time uh... i'm not sure i i sleep field of the double-the-way space down what grocery store you at doctor joker you with christie these

have your primary care actually look at the place where it is i don't i don't have a primary care for the city all right i'll look right now and tell you i can hook you up all that would be great if you live in the city i can hook you up i do can it now but he has no insurance i have no insurance well it's okay so what's up what's your piece of mind works you know a hundred bucks for a quick visit

yeah i gave the one guy a hundred fifty you already waste money on an urgent care where they just threw an antibiotic at something that's obviously not a now dr steve can we look and i have a I have Lewis look down his throat right now with a flashlight Okay, okay, this is serious business now is there a wait a minute is there something we get at CVS to make his mouth bigger hold on I'm gonna describe it to dr. Steve right now. What is cancer? My neck What is it? You can see it.

Just have him pant. I can't. I'm a fuck fuck fuck. I see. I see that'll open up his, uh, his, uh, pal. Pants, just fucking do it. The doctor says I'm wearing pants. Can I?

That counts. Pants. Hey, Bobby. Yes. Bring him with you April 23rd. And, uh, we'll put him him on we'll get him a spot And I'll look at his throat myself pants When can I get you fucking you shut the fuck up?

He just invited you on the gig my gig. What gig? I'm out of joke teeth are shitty Can I yeah, can I talk to him? But listen sir? Dr. Steve? It I don't have any mucus though. There no snott there's no stuffy there's no runny nose is no sneezing yeah you know you can have post nasal grip without all of those things you confident at all no

no fever no nothing has a really small mouth but he's also got herpes because because that'd be a herpes outbreak. I hear you get to me. I throw. Yeah, but the herpes should have been gone by now. It's been 15 days. Yes.

So the only thing I can tell you, Joe, if somebody needs to look in there, the odds that it's throat cancer is vanishing like small. I don't want you to worry about that. It's most likely a virus of some sort or it could be just some localized irritation. You just breathe them out.

That was why. You're saying that it's good. It would be good to have somebody go in there and do a swab, and they can send it off. All right. If you're worried about chlamydia and stuff like that, they can do a swab. I'm not worried about that.

OK. So Dr. Steve, Dr. Steve, you're going to're gonna call him after, you're gonna talk to him. I can call you at some time, I've got, I've got no peace of mind. Shut up, you're gonna call him tonight. Great. What? Wait, can you give me some stuff to do

and if it goes away, then that'll lead us down. Now, okay, now listen, I got a question for you. I'm wiping my butthole, I stuck my finger in my butthole a little bit and something bit the top of my finger what is that yeah that's well you have a very vigorous tape or my finger my finger they'll came off also doctor Steve last spring doctor Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr.

Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr.

Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr.

Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr. Steve. Dr. I can't hear him. He had his fucking eye boogers removed last week this sis on his eye Yeah, he told me oh really yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, cuz they wouldn't go away. Yeah, yeah, they're making they're making us throw up I have one video of me having a salase on removed and basically what they do body They split the in virtue eyelid so that it's inside out basically and then they stick a needle in the underside of the eyelid and then they take a scalpel and put a slit in there and then scoop it out with a curete and I had my ophthalmologist put it on YouTube, got 300,000 views on people's rights. Some more than anybody who's standing. No, it's kind of a brutal surgery,

but it feels good afterward and your vision is better and you don't have to stick to the lumpy island. Yeah, I got done. They put me out with a propa fall, though. The same thing they gave to Michael Jackson. Oh, they put you out for it? Yeah, well, they put me out and then they did, like for like a few minutes, then they did the local

anesthetic and then what? I'm done. I've done with him Fuck you dude. I'm just glad there is your fucking shit's gone. I'll call you later, dr. Steve Steve I love you buddy. Thanks for calling. I mean, thanks for picking up I Have to have Joe call me after the show. I will okay, buddy. Bye. Take care. Thanks doc You're sitting there talk about your fucking Pomegranate. We know you had your eyeballs. We got all that out. That was terrible

There's no laughs. No, it's good. They need them. We were laughing. We were fucking killing it for an hour and a half But here's the thing that's a bummer. He didn't give me any piece of mine there You can't he's a doctor He's a vanishingly small that didn't help at all. We have to look at you He can't look he can't say this is not cancer without looking you. But we've had this. Here's the thing though. I'll talk about it after.

But you can't just look at it. It's not the back of my throat. Like it's under here. It's a gland. He can't see it. Can I say something to you? Of course you can. And can you listen to me?

I always look at the first four letters and listen to your list. Will you please just fucking call him. He will right now start the process of eliminating everything. So the last possible thing will be you going to another person who he helps you find and they will fucking make sure and find out what it is. But he's going to try to help you do other things before that to eliminate that it's not the drip or what a post nasal drip Or it's not this or that before he gets the fucking cancer. Can we call him back?

No, I don't want a fucking taught, a grocery store. I got him talking about fucking assholes and nuts. Well I wanted to ask him, can a sore throat last longer than 15 days? Google that. I can Google it all. I guarantee you that. Especially with the weather going high and low, like that, dropping.

Yes, the weather. Maybe it's the weather. All I need is something like this. You find what you're getting. It is the weather. Not for nothing. I'll say, Scopo has never been better on this show. He hasn't said a, oh.

He couldn't hit to sit that out because there was headphones. He doesn't have a chance. Scopo, what are you doing Yeah, he gave me a copy of what are you doing you sick? Are you sick? Well, it's wrong with you so I throw You just had diarrhea downstairs. Oh my god right now call Dr. Steve Call no, no Call no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no to be buddy is gonna go for a little longer but when I wrap it up it takes a half hour can I just like to pizza every time I do this no you can't why I brought it you can't every time we do this you always go no and I say the same thing to you and then you understand it here's the thing Bobby I am lonely Bobby this has only been a an hour and a

half show five to seven days a two hour fucking yeah by the time what here what you said to 7 days 5 to 7 days All right, you just what happens if I have a sore throat for 15 days? What could it be no? I've already done the road Google dollars of Google dollars. Please cancer. Please I've already Googled all this pulled the Ninja totals back up. That was hilarious Remember me by the Ninja total cancer. I said we get into another topic You here's the thing you did another show earlier today And now you're fucking getting lazy with this one. This is the a show. Who was on the earlier show?

I'm not gonna who was on the earlier show. I'm not getting lazy with this who it takes Everybody knows when I read start to wrap up. It's a half hour Who's on the other side for 40 minutes? If I wait to wrap up two hours? I don't want to get weird here, but we're gonna do our plugs. It's not gonna take that long What was I gonna show I forget you don't forget you're not telling me well, maybe it's you the war was a skim milk It's not a great. I bet you was a shitty show. I was a fucking great So it wasn't there. I wasn't there Lewis wasn't there Where's your milk? We are good numbers. It was actually great. Who was it?

I want you fucking tell me You want what you want and I don't like fucking you getting it I like you understand that you're not the mother fucker. I make money. I'm funny too Lucy I live in a good neighborhood i'm funny to whoo and i look at the uh...

i was here over under over under all the guests to the followers over under twenty thousand all of them not counting bobby i say under under twenty you said i know what he said it's sixteen grand what do you say all of our own is grand camp or anything but not money i was a grand was only a money to over. Hold on to.

What do you got under? Under what do you got? Wait, what is this for just stand-up gig? All the guests I had on the last show have less than 60 dollars. Oh, way under. Oh, I never knew there's one person is. Oh, yeah, dude, are you kidding me? PDD approved James Matter and Will Silvins.

Will Silvins has a lot. And Will Silvins is fucking, they were all great they can't be great seven hundred will has been new comedy for for the other ones up at the other ones up you know that 9700 for will yeah plus can somebody get a calculator out we can do 9000

we figure it out you know you fucking down seven oh seven plus 10000 minus 758 for PDD a brook so there you go okay hold on I don't do it out loud dummy we get it Mike Vekion has 6,500 done you're over over 20,000 no fucking math no 16 I said 20 over under who said 16 he said 16 but 20 was the number I didn't say anything someone said what else you got James matters myder's my roommate James Madder

2,993 they you're at we're almost at 20 boss 15 on the show Who else me No, you don't counting you why I Get well count fucking Lewis. I mean that scopo. Okay, okay? I guess either 1,740 20 grand. We're already at 20. No, you're not yeah. Yeah, we are no It's not it is 6,000 plus 9,000 is 15,000 fuck fuck and yeah, I'm mad you get when somebody go Oh, you're so stupid. No, I'm not I'm smart too, and I make money. I'm a hustler No, that's not what I'm saying. Lewis just go louder. There was just joke after joke of these like Lewis's poor

Lewis can't afford a fucking movie ticket Lewis can't I'm like fuck face. I'm not saying Lewis just go louder. It was just joke after joke of these like Lewis's poor Lewis can't afford a fucking movie ticket Lewis can't I'm like fuck face I'm not that poor. Why is that the fucking joke over and over again? I'm a close. I'm above the poverty fine. Did you get food stamps? You're about the poor. I got food stamps. You're about the Puerto Rican poverty line.

R2D poo. I'm a just tire. I'm off for a R2D poo and Lauren in there just for good measure. Even that's all the same Twitter followers. Adam up. Adam up. 1,221 for R2D pooh and Lauren in there just for good measure even it's all the same Twitter followers. Adam up Adam up 1,221 for R2D pooh. Okay, Adam up Lauren's got 428 damn you need to show some tit. I know you need to stop fucking around. That's it. That's a total. What's a total?

No, it wasn't I hate Get it out. What's your wrong? You guys are just fucking stupid 9000 plus 6000 with a two big number It was 9 something dumb dumb you can't just throw 600 people out the window to make you point. That's what Hitler did I'm fucking jealous. He's the only funny person in the room. Fuck you! What? I'm fucking funny. I make money. I'm fucking. Greg, are you mad at me? I got a bad look over there.

Yeah, I'm furious, bro. Why are you mad at you? He knows what he did. What did you do? I don't know. I kissed him on the lips and I have throw cancer. I am. All right, let's go to the lips and I have throat cancer. I am. Alright, let's go to the chat room real quick. What do you got? Uh, chat room wants to know two things.

Have we discussed the Kevin Brennan beef with Legion of Skanks? Yes. We did. We discussed it. He talked about it. That was a wrestling beef. He kind of glossed over it, I feel like. They don't even know what happens.

They want to know what happens. Well, you know, we had two Legion of Skanks tonight at 9 o'clock, Anthony Cumbia. And two days was story. Why can't we talk about a random and fuck tuning in? Stay here and open your fucking pie hole now you're Puerto Rican. I already talked about it. I said it. I crushed him. I'm the man. He's a bitch and that's that. That's life. Okay. Then two-in-a-in-a-legion of skanks at ten o'clock on Monday's with memories. Sure. Yeah. Go ahead. And the second thing they want to know, who is Micah? Hi. Hi Micah. Did I not introduce her?

We kind of like we didn't really explore her. You introduced me by saying I found a dead body on the terrain. Hi Micah. I've known you for a while. You actually used to be on Danny's podcast. That's right. Comic-Con with Shultz. Remember?

Shultz? Was that anything? Oh Andrew Shultz. Yeah, he was our intern. He was a band of shits. He was a band of shits. Right. shaltz yeah he was our intern he was a little bit right Andrew was the fucking he's the past both of them listen Bobby and

Gives me hope all right ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Where you was co-host? I was a co-host, yeah. And with two other guys, who are the other guys? Chris Laiakono and a psychopath named Dave Kasten. Now this show, this podcast was a fun, it was one of the first podcasts. It was actually on FM Radio. Yeah, it wasn't a podcast, it was actually radio show, right? That's right, yeah, it was on WBNB. It was one of the first podcasts. No, but they did a podcast.

They did a podcast, yeah. It was both. It was both. It was both. It eventually went to podcast, but I have to talk for a left. But it was a big fucking show. He had a lot of big stars on it. Paul and was like the one that would come on a few times, right?

Yeah, Carl and before he died and then his, you know, less 20 brother after a while. And we had Carl and after he died, it was really sad. We had Paul G. Amadeon. Fucking Daniel Abel was the biggest hustler ever. He saw Paul G. Amadeon on this tree. Yeah, so 360 dollars. On the fucking street and was like, hey,

talk to him into coming into our station and doing a fucking podcast. Paul G. Amade, fucking angel, by the way. great guy. Yeah, I mean you gave us a test that shot That show was a fucking great show. Yeah, I mean it was a big show I remember I went in a couple times and to promote it was like the the beginning of all this horses Well, it's because because big guests a little bit nobody had podcasts back then and comics were fucking narcissists So if somebody said I want to interview you everyone's go. Oh, yeah, of course. I'm a heartbeat. No, it was a good show Yeah, no, it was not that it was actually a good fun show It can be because it was edgy radio in Manhattan which they don't you can't get unless you're you know

Black comic dead you can go on 98 point whatever the fuck it was But they didn't have radio in Manhattan you to promote your shit You go on this show and it was actually pretty fun. What is this did fucking 1600s they never radio in the name one radio show in Manhattan that you do to promote your shows Oh, I don't know, but they have radio they do but you does not let allow comics in well I know but since 81 video killed the radio star. So anyways, got up up, but up Farts. We, uh, yeah, we used to go on that show a lot. What happened at that show? Oh, I don't know. I left for Houston to work on a show and it just, what show

did you leave? I was producing reality television show. You were? Yeah. No shit. What was it? Uh, it was called flipped off. It was on any one season. I did a couple for MTV. I've had a few lives. So you, you produced it. Yeah. And wrote, you just come up with it. Did you write it? Were you a showrunner? Um, not on that one. I did a couple for MTV. I've had a few lives. So you produced it? Yeah. And you just come up with it. Did you ride it? Were you show running? Not on that one. I started riding on the one's for MTV though. No shit. Yeah. Well, that's great. It was like a fucking little platform that. I mean, think about you, Danny.

And Chris O'Soo. No, it doesn't do comedy anymore, right? He's in Colorado. I saw him. He did like the risk part. I don't know. I think he still fucks around like a hobbyist, you know? Yeah. Yeah, it was pretty fucking crazy, man. What a, what a, and that's just gone.

I mean, Danny had a big show. He's got a modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern,

that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, that modern, modern, be on TV. We all had a farm. Yeah, what happened?

I don't know. It just never got sold the the director had a career the camera guy had a career and none of us got a career It was a fucking great. It still exists. Yeah, I mean it's out there It's like on Facebook and video sometimes I'll find it and watch it and cry. I thought it was hilarious Comma Correa. It was really really radio. It was really really. I'm a great. That's a magazine too. Comic Radio magazine. We are going to use the run shows like bought ad space in their magazine. No shit. Yeah. Wow. Boy, we've all come along with.

Well, some of us. Not all of us. We should probably wrap up. Ah, I don't know. Well, all right. So, well, thank you for coming on. Oh, I hope so. I'm glad that nobody died on the train. No, I hope someone died. No, I don't want to be dying.

Yeah, I hope someone did. If they're going to hold a rush hour traffic like that. Somebody could hit in the face with the train earlier today. Did you see that story? Maybe that's it. A guy stole an iPhone. This is much earlier right there in the morning. That's it going around, Google it.

A guy stole an iPhone and then he went to run. He could hit in the face with the F-trained. That's not going to make any happen. How do you get hit in the face? You mean you lost his head? I think it was hit his nose or what, I didn't read the whole article. What does he say? Seren get hit in the face? You mean you lost his head? Like I think it was, it's like hit his nose or what I scraped his face. I didn't read the whole article.

What does he like, zero no to burzer up with the fuck his nose like? It's going around. I'm telling you. I hope it's not. Check it out. Chain of cancer. Yeah, that's it.

Dang, hit the face with the train. Robert, Apple phone, typing all these words. I did grab a kid one time on the F-Train platform. He was going, he got away. I could get away from his mom and I fucking grabbed him and maybe saved his life. So every kid that I harass, I save one. That's great.

A thief who snatched a teen cell phone, tried to escape by running to the subway. Why, could you be a little more enthusiastic? Fucking teen. He hit the tracks, panicked and rushed home. Boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop. 8 AM, 65th Street. So in here, but he was a 13 year old boy, boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom boom Oh, you've been on crime report. I let's wrap this up. So what do you got going on? What's happening besides a gun?

Why do you have a gun necklace? I don't, you know what I know something? It's a piece of shit gave it to me. I hated it. Then this new guy I'm dating was like, you should wear it. And I did it today for the first time in years. And now it's a piece of shit again. Here we go.

Sorry, that was a complicated. I liked it. You did the buzzard. I feel like you're projecting at us, Michael. Yeah, I'm, I'll sell. I don't know. I got a 15th. I'm open up for Keith Malian is DVD taping live stream.

And listen to my podcast this week in Jackin. I host with Chris Laker on Cape Cromedy Radio. We ask people what they masturbate to. Great. That's a good one. That's fun. That's what I masturbate to. Yeah.

Go ahead. Look at the tranny check. Show us again, Bob. Man, she's hot. She's not hot. She's a gross tranny. She looks like a expert. She's not she's a close Tranny she looks like a God don't talk about her that way she's dirty shut up everybody she's defective stop it She's a small penis. What are you out of your mind? You've seen it?

Fucking crazy hang on right now fucking show you the fucking small penis. I want to see the cock on this You want to see this fucking thing? Watch this fucking yudge me off. That guy will be. Bob, you only have an MX gold? What? I figured if a platinum or a black cork considering how well you're doing. Peace. There's a platinum.

Oh, shit. The camera is shit. I don't know. By the way, somebody has the number now, because that was on camera. Oh, is it? I'll blow it out later. Thank you. Well get it in the chest I'll cut the fuck up. It's fake. It's fake. It's fuck. It's wrong. You what why would you do that? Well, it's really funny if the cancel your index card It's been to it. We're something. No joke. That's what cancer looks like

That's no that's what Kevin looks like. What are you talking about? Holy shit? That's a big old fucking fat dick lady Let's all make a promise if our girlfriends or wives die We suck that dick no matter when how long ago from it now. You can't just go and suck. You have to ask What if we just get a guy that has that dick and then put a wig on him? Is that count? If it's someone I like or enjoy their comedy, Did I show you the dick? Yeah, so... Oh, did you see the Apollo thing? What?

Oh, boy. This is the... All right, talk amongst yourselves. I'll pull this out. All right, so you got there. What do you got going on, man? I don't know. I mean, you can check my podcast, the Rad Dude Cast.

What is it called? The Rad Dude Cast. Kind of feel like he's stepping on my toes. Or my YouTube... That's an actual porn. And he's watching the follow. Yes, just no followers. What the fuck is this?

No one knows it's happening. What happened? What is he doing? So the guy's watching the follow while he's getting jerked off. Yes, that's great. All right, listen. So what's your podcast called? The Rad Dude cast.

The Rad Dude cast, where's that on iTunes just on iTunes who's that one to be guy about Brendan Ernie I think the video yeah comics yeah cool yeah it's cool yeah I don't know all right great man thanks for coming on brother thanks for having me you got to see again because you came on again I'll remember you now yeah I don't care whatever I appreciate it but you know put any pressure on yourself how much do you pay so can I get a few bucks for bringing in some fucking real guests for a change?

That's a heat by the way Bob, you should let me and Joe fucking run the show for a month and show you how much we can upgrade the show Because you got fucking skim up producers over here The proof is no You have to fill and the second show, okay? Okay, all right, you want a better one? Who wants riddle me this? Which one will be Joe will go combined? We'll do it together Boom so for the next month you'll book the show 100% yes and Scopo he can you know be around What happens to Scopo? What do I do at Scopo? I don't know whatever you want do have a drive around

Someone has to have a big runny dump in the bathroom Are you gonna shave yourself? Did you shave yourself? He's upset? Are you just a chill? This is by he's just preemptively. Why do you want to go on? He's gonna lose the rose bed. I'll go for it tonight. Why? You can't do the rose bed.

I'll sick, dude. Oh, look, he's gonna fucking fall out. I was gonna pussy out. I can't make this shit. He's been planning this fucking dump all day. I bet he fucking ate some dirty food. That's why he's sick. He doesn't want to bomb it.

I just made a statement that made me want to put myself. Yeah, let me enjoy, produce the show for a month. Are you gonna do all the social media too? No, book it. You're a social media intern. She can be a social media intern. She can be a community engineer. Okay, you keep your job.

Deep who's the engineer, Scopo could be the fucking guy. I love the learners as much. As long as you don't fuck with Lauren, she's like fine. Scopo is doing the booking at the lantern. We can book from the seller and LOL. He lost the lantern. He's not even doing that anymore.

Oh shit! Deepo, that felt real. You see what we say? We're buddies, we're roommates, we're gay. What do you get? Who really hates Scopo? What do you get, bud? All right, guys.

Tonight, of course, I got the roast masters, which I'm hosting at the stand for watching what i of course if you can watch if you watch my don't run my fucking pluggs joe were co-producers right now so stop in a fucking jerk off i would do that to you uh... you really fight with everybody yeah so uh... guys also even yeah fucking rain man you should get plugs for your head ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha'm gonna be up at the new Haar Ridgewood. Cut your balls. Bobby just choked on his fucking

altoid in that thing. Dude if you fucking died on this show it would make me so happy. Um, come on man. April 15th and 16th Haar Ridgewood I'm co-headlining with Mike Cannon. Guys check it out four shows that weekend. Oh. I'm kidding, dude. That's how I'm gonna do that. You do that. You do that. It's fucking insensitive. It's shitty. I think it's out. It's great show.

That's a great show. And we're buddies and we're both from that area, so we're gonna get a bunch of people from that. You did that for me for years, and I had a lot of resentments. Yeah, but you weren't funny there for years. No, I'm kidding. You did great. You, I had resentments.

What I do. Because I would plug gigs that was paid. You're like, you're like, you're fagging. Oh, my God. You did great. You I had resentments. What I do I would plug gigs. That was Yeah, you're doing You're my plug Yes, God thank you. I'll be in Los Angeles from April 17th. All right. You used to do April 17th the 21st and then Los Angeles. I got a bunch of shows at the comedy store Also, you'll be doing Kill Tony at the comedy store Joey D. S's podcast the church of what's happening, which is it love Joey live. He's fucking so funny dude

He stinks so bad. He can only kill one person at a time Lewis kill Tony nothing nothing all right, I'll take it and then no you got something here that may 13th Legion of Skanks presents Lewis, Jay Gomez Dave Smith and special guest dance odor at the hustler club in Detroit So get your tickets at Hustler Club Detroit. I'm gonna go to Detroit. Dude, fucking this is from Detroit. Who's from Detroit? Lauren?

No, the girl. The girl. What girl? No. The trainee. Iggy Pop is a man. We'll find you a better-looking trainee. And also check out my other podcasts.

The Realest Podcasts available on guest-digitalnetwork-gestigital.com. Guest-digitalnetwork.com, which we are in beta test. All right com Which we are in beta test right now Legion of skanks every Tuesday and Wednesday night 9 p.m That's it. No, I get the pull all of it, but then go to another one and get the other part busy I got shit going on and you made all my money. You know make any money from good father from Legion of skanks I do and from the countdown every Thursday 6 p.m. Eastern standard. A lot of you night podcasts here at 6m rush 93. Please check that out as well. Hi buddy. What do you got, Joe?

Hey, it's me, Joe is the truth. I'm trying to kind of a Lewis. Anyways, April 14th. Oh, you can also check out the mashup show at the stand every month. It's another show that I do. Hey, DeVito and I, can we do that? Yeah, 100% you're on the next one. Awesome. Thanks professional book There's a lot of people that are saying that they try to talk to

Scopo and he says I don't know the scope is a fucking he's he this is the he holds it to such a high value And he's got a cockiness with people. What do you mean? What are you talking about? I'll recommend people to scope it. It's a guy I don't know. I guess we'll see if we'll get him in. We'll get him in. I'm like, fuck it, Scopo. It's absolutely longer. Is he lying?

Why are you lying? I don't know why I would lie about that. I'm asking you. There's no upside to lying. Are you lying? You'll see the way me and Joe booked the show. I already booked one. This show was a killer.

I got fake aides and fucking Greg Stone. Yeah. I couldn't think of what you told I had a cut a lot I'm gonna laugh at people that a couple pearls. What do you got? That's my place tiny mouth cancer shitty team no chin're the shark teeth. Are you true? Come on.

April 14th, 15th and 16th, I'll be headlining Bob, Dr. Grins. What the fuck is that? And if you want to go back to back weeks, you can see Nick DePolo there the week after me. Oh. April 14th, 15th and 16th. Dr. Grins.

Yeah. Grand Rapids, bro. You've worked there. Are you not being booked there? I have a show there, but I have it a rock club coming up by on my tour that I'm doing in the fall. Great. April 21st, 22nd, and 23rd, I'll be at Moontower, Moontower.

I'm doing the bonfire while I'm out there. Tuesdays with stories you can hear every Tuesday on iTunes. And we just got t-shirts. What's the website of those t-shirts that we sell? Merch-card. Merch-card.com. The guy you sent me. Yep.

Good. Yeah. And then you owe me t-shirt money, which I should be getting by, I don't know, May 5th through the 7th or somewhere. I want to wait and see if you have cancer before I give you that money. Great. So you can get your Tuesdays with stories gear. But check out that podcast every Tuesday We're bringing the heat over there.

And then April 29th and 30th, Providence Comedy Connection. Great club. Yeah. What else you got? Did I get a bunch of other stuff? I don't want you to fucking laugh. Dude, I didn't laugh at that. I think it's great.

Your career is going great. I'm so happy. Yeah, it's going terrific. I love you. What do you got, Jay? I'm going to be on Sex Drugs and Rock and Roll, which I'm really excited about. I'll be funny if I can really get him on the show. I can get anybody on the show.

Yeah, Bartender or a cop. I did. No, I don't know if I can just go in the band. I'll do the adultery. Yeah, I can do a fake, fake piano, air guitar. I'm lucky. I'm on the fucking show this year. You got that right. What? FX, what is it? FX big give big if BamBam, hard to pack an episode for. comedian Jason.com. I get my Twitter and Instagram linked on there. I'm going to be on a show called Tell Me Everything and

Monday and serious XM. It's like talk politics. It's pretty fun. Cool. loosely, let us wearing and then I'm doing a show called Freehold, a lobby comedy at Freehold, Barn Brooklyn, one of the guys from the Daily Show, the correspondent, Ronnie Chang is on it. Oh shit. Oh yeah, Ronnie, that's, he came up here one night. And Michelle Wolf just became a correspondent too. Yeah, Wolf Wolf, do you find that?

Yeah, she's, come, so congratulations to her, she's fucking killing it, man. Who fucking said she looks like Kara Top on the last show that was so fucking fine yeah uh... she's killing it so congratulations to her and that's it you anything else now that's a good cool man i'd rich and i friends again boss so yeah no no yeah yeah anything from the chat room real quick

uh... now i don't think I have anything, sorry. What's the last thing said in the chair room? Billy Drew, it says diabetes, Bob. I don't know what that's about. That's what you thought. What else you got? Excuse me.

Raymond Tarrers says I'm planning to go to L.A. to see Killtoni with Lewis. Fuck yeah, bro. That's a trip. You're making a trip to go to L.A. to see Lewis. Fuck yeah, bro. This's a trip. You're making a trip to go to LA to see Lewis. Fuck yeah, bro. This is the end of Anita. She has nowhere else to be.

To do a trip to fucking LA for 10 minutes. Oh, also, no, I'll be at the flappers as well. Oh god, fucking, my doctor grins. Maybe near Bob. What else you got? Oh, fuck. Um, Laura Majame says I want to rub his bald, smooth head. I love you. Which one? Yeah, there's a bunch of guys in here with a ball. How do you know what you, Bob? It's gotta be me. How do you know? You don't have to be.

Let me have it. Ask if the jaw is wider than the head. You speak of. What? Why are you looking at me like that? It's wrong, man. You're still wet, looks like a pear. It's a pear-shaped head.

Yeah, it's adorable. Some people like it. Some person. Done. Likes it. Yeah, you have a crab apple head. You're a crab apple head. You're a crab apple head.

You're a crab apple head. You're a crab apple head. You're a crab apple head. You're a crab apple head. You're still wet, looks like a pair. I have a pair of shaped head Yeah, it's adorable. Something you'll like it. It's a person done likes it. Yeah, you have a crab apple head You're welcome for me laughing at that. Thank you. How Lauren. What do you got? Just at Lauren Cabera a Twitter Instagram Facebook and if you want to come on the show just email YKWD producer No, no you email Lewis to go as comedy dot com now or joe at fucking no to be yes fans oh fans producer

because go go through learn thank you yeah anyway luis wouldn't be cut dead with a fan ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha if you want to send it stuff attack now whoo ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

yeah the fuck you're up list of maniacs just be nice to people no one else enjoy your lives if you meet a list of maniac you punch him square in the fucking nose that is one hundred percent what you do every time it's so funny to see the gomites and and the list of maniacs fighting see like five people fighting people

list of maniacs stay away from the projects you don't run into any fucking go mites. Too far? No, I loved it. Oh, well. What do you got, Deepu? On Twitter and Instagram, R2DPU. I'm around.

Give me a stand-up. That's it for me. OK, what do you got besides diarrhea? That Chris Gobo on the Twitter. That's it. That's it? What do I got? Um.

Rhett sounds theater. People, 23. Tits. A theater? on the Twitter. That's it. What do I got? Um. RhettSounds Theater. April 23. Tits. A theater. Who are you opening for? What? Where is it, Scopo?

Kingsport, Tennessee. Come on, spin it. Give me a fucking block. Kingsport, Tennessee. Renison Theater. Fucking Conor. April 23. The tickets will probably be sold out soon.

So go and get them now. I don't know. It goes on at 8. dentist comes on a day forty five uh... why you're looking at me like that i thought the funny but the billboards gonna be there for ten days in a row the week after

okay i'm a twenty second we have pod fest that didn't make sense that remember when he did fucking you we did the one night at out of the will burn and then bill was at the next week for two uh... he was there before no that was where we're in Laf Boston. We're in Laf Boston. Bill, he was there for 13 shows.

They actually had him do an afternoon show one on a Wednesday. Oh, fuck, no. Boy. May 22nd, podcast. He just bit it out, baby. We got it. That Sunday 930, going to be you, Lewis, Joe and Dan. Yeah.

All right. What's up, buddy? I was just giving devil one. It's gonna be a fucking great show. I'm really excited about that. That's gonna be fun. The fucking 18. By the way, my booking style is going to be always me, Joe and Dan.

And then, if one of us isn't available, we'll go to the outskirts and get will. That's the booking style we have. It's not true. Yeah. Yeah, it is. That's the truth. That's what we do. Yeah, only for five years though. Yeah. Yeah, that's what we do. They don't call me every week. Well, that's him. I Chalumbacol. Okay. Well, that's the I don't get a phone call every week to be on the show. If that was the case, if that was your booking style, I would get a phone call every week. I wasn't banned. I chose not to be in here. It wasn't banned by making Bobby hate me.

to be in here. Who isn't banned by making Bobby hate me. All right, listen, you guys, this is a, this was a fun show. I love you guys for coming in. Thanks. I hope you had time. Yeah, and come back again soon. What the fuck was that? That was me. Oh, okay, I thought my fuck, I thought I was on a stroke, fucking vibrations in the left side of my head. I don't think you fucking motherfuckers for listening and tuning in every week. You guys are the best fans in the world. Make sure you go to the website, check out all the other podcasts at riotcast.com. We just added Misery Loves Company.

It is fucking killing it on iTunes. They did their first Monday night on Sirius. So we're very proud of those guys and make sure you check out all the other shows at riotcast.com. And we have a little donate button on our page if you want to throw a little cash out way. If not, don't worry about it. It's always free. You're the best.

You know what, dude. We'll see you later. to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Shitty jobs. Shitty jobs. Check out riotcast.com for all the best podcasts on the internet. And they're all free. And they're all free. Join us.

Join us. Thanks for watching!