Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Dudes Who Like Dudes

Episode Date: May 28, 2012

Comedians Nate Bargatze and Luis J Gomez join the crew. Riotcast.com @YKWDPodcast @robertkelly @dansoder @kellyfastuca www.facebook.com/ykwdpodcast http://ykwdpodcast.tumblr.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hoy es un día de eso de no saber cómo va a acabar el día. Donde nadie pregunta a dónde viene, sino por qué no te viene. Y una ronda es el tiempo que pasa entre no conocernos, y no creer olvidarnos. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos vía. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos encuentra. Maú, la vida es más vida cuando nos encontramos. Encuentra los bares de Madrid la dicción especial de Madrid nos liga. Un duvena que de Maú, a Madrid. Hey, this is Nate Bargazzi, you listen to Robert Kelly's You Know What, Dude?

On riotcast.com. Go listen to it. It's great. Right? Is that good? I thought it was unbelievable. For you, it was good. Hey, what's up guys?

This is Lewis J Gomez. You listening to You Know What Did? On the right cast network, right cast.com. Hey guys, Bailey J here. As we all know, Bobby Kelly is super gay for my dick. So it was no surprise when we all heard that the Bailey J show was moving to the right cast network. So if you like real conversations and fake tips, I'm your man. Literally. So listen to the

Bailey J show right here on the Riotcast Network. Riotcast.com Hey it's your old pal Dr. Steve when I'm not kissing Bob Kelly's ass or or diagnosing his awful rectal words. I'm doing a program called Weird Medicine that uncensored medical show on the Riotcast Network. We talk honestly about real issues affecting real people. What am I talking about? Questions about rectal cysts and dick cheese are hilarious! So if you have an embarrassing medical problem or just love to laugh at other people's

expense, listen to Weird Medicine on the Riotcastnet Riotcast.com If you're a fan of you know what dude you're only getting half the fun. Check out Robert Kelly Live on stage June 21st, 22nd and 23rd at the Comedy Club in Webster New York. He'll also be coming back home to Boston for a very special show at the Wilbur Theatre. Pre-Sales are available now. That show is August 18th. Go to Robert Kelly Live.com for tickets and information.

Also check out the one and only monster voice Dan Soder. Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr Connecticut that's May 31st through June 1st you can get tickets and information at Foxwoods.com Check them out support them buy some tickets. Dude Hey gang, this is Colin Quinn. This is Jim Norton. This is Dennis Liri. This is Opie from a lot of things This is Bert Kreiser. Staying cooking you are listening to Robert Kelly's you know what dude? You know what dude You are listening to Robert Kelly's, you know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? This is Robert Kelly's, you know what dude? You know what dude?

You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude?

You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? You know what dude? All right, let's just fucking go. This is the You Know What, dude? Podcast episode. We have Kelly. This is for you. Yeah, I got son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son.

I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son.

I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son.

I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. I'm a good son. just handed it to her. Because they got their stupid camaraderie from their, they both got off the islands and now they have to look at each other. Like in Shawshank when they get out of prison, they got to care of each other. What happened to your pants, Lohes?

I spilled coffee on my pants. Just Kelly and then coach. Oh, dude, I was gonna mention that. I'll clean it up. I'll clean it up. The napkins right there. I don't know. When were you gonna clean it up, you poor, Tareken? I'm sorry, I figured it was just fucking coffee.'re white people. We're just flip over the closure. Yeah

And by the way isn't this Kelly's job to clean things up when guest film? I'm not putting no one in the middle. She's not a job. She's not a maid. Yeah. She's simply a podcast-witch. When you touch success, she'll touch between my legs. Is that what you're gonna say? You're gonna treat someone badly. Doesn't your people, don't they? It stinks really just clean up. I'm gonna be like, you on me to clean the couch for you

and throw the bunk guys. Don't fucking take a picture of this. You're gonna picture me through the couch. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, yeah. Take another picture. Ozzy, get over there. No, no, no, no, no.

I got a little, I got a little, eight round. I got fat thighs No rock a dialed-down B you snap off as many pictures you get That's gonna be his profile picture on Craigslist when he's a fucking maid Actor who didn't make it I really I really No, he's not

These headphones on I'm kidding. He's the best. I'm kidding. No, he's not. Can I just say something? Hang on now. At least headphones on. Yeah. Everybody's really dying to go on. You can tell when people are dying to talk, like a duo podcast, when people are on fire, when everybody just is dying to yap. You Lewis haven't shut the fuck up since you got here.

That's why you got me here. And then you've been yapping too. Kelly's fucking, or I'm fucking, yeah, everybody's yapping. Yes, there isn't. The sniper. The sniper. The rooftop. The rooftop.

The rooftop. Because that's the main part, get it. Nate is back and he's just slowly with those round fucking, I fucked my cousin. How's he going gonna say Japanese anime But that's good. It looks like everybody in justified every extra Just look like someone that's gonna take a shot at Timothy Olafant. How do you know that? We have we have a neighbor gassy the snipers back. We have Lewis the

see the snipers back we have Lewis this big go man. Come on, bro. I didn't say the last part span. Yeah, what did you guys stop? Don't make me racist. It's like a term end deal. Of course. I want to say that sorry. She pulls out one of those pockets English to Australian. Australian English things. It's a compliment. Did you really think you were gonna stutter and we weren't gonna fucking. Why are you nuts? Anyways, we got Lewis J. Gomez,

who I fucking love from here. I'm just saying. And then we have Kelly Fat Kelly. Yeah. Actually Skinny Kelly. We was looking pretty good in the summer. Yeah, a little tank top action. Yeah, a little tank top action.

But you know, but we also need to acknowledge that that tank top hides her scars like Rambo in first blood. She used to be fat. That's me. I'm sorry. As another fat person, I think. Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't really like.

I'm sorry You said scars like she was in a fucking Mexican game He Looking so good And then we have for good Joe who's a Filmeca filmmaker yeah, yeah, and he's actually here taking nice enough to take photos. Thanks for coming down. But listen, you don't listen to anybody but me. You don't let him tell you not to take a photo of him cleaning up his balls.

You snap away. All right, you perfectly manicure. Bobby, I tell you a funny, I know, I've known Joe for 10 years. Really? We used to date when I was like 19-20. So you fucked. He's the only one in the room who saved me naked. Get on my mic. Get over here, get over on that mic.

Come here buddy. Come on. Come on buddy. We're going to find out what fat Kelly's roots are. I'm sorry Joe. I'm sorry Joe. No, no, no. Keep the camera on.

You don't even know how good it's going to get. You don't even know what I'm giving you today. You're not going to stay the whole time. Don't get relaxed. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm a Wow It's a Spells his name J.O.A.A.O I'm Joe you're gonna eat it. Have you ever been on radio Joe? I haven't already had before yes I'm eating a meeting I'm eating Kelly it's going back to the good old days

Just like you ate her box Yeah It's going back to the good old days. Just like you ate her box. Yeah. Was that a Kelly Spatio? What's that? I was in that fat when I was with DJ. So I have a company. Hang on, Kelly. Everybody shut the fuck up.

Everybody's talking over and over again. I got these, I spent thousands of dollars on these headphones and nobody seems to use them. Kelly's getting nervous because she knows that a lot of shit nobody seems to use them. Kelly's getting nervous because she knows that a lot of shit's about to go down. Yeah, because we have actually somebody from a home guy who's seen her box back in the good old days. Not only that, but you brought in if you remember, the Fisher episode was with Delta Force over there, fucking Nate the sniper who runs into a firefight with a fucking knife in between his team. He's going down. He rollerblade into the fight.

He rollerblade. I feel like with Nate and the WC, it's like the 92 dream team coming back together. But I'm like that walk guy that they shouldn't pick down. Our dream team. America's dream team. Christian was in the mile or something. I just wanted that word. He fucking. That way you're I don't know. I just wanted that wordy That was the most wordy fucking joke. I just wanted to keep going. No, it's okay He was a baseball he was a big black reference all right I just tries to bring up black

I'm a cheat Listen one time listen Joe Joe From Australia. That's right. Joe. Joe, from Australia. That's right. Right. Do you like Australia? Yeah, of course.

Well, all right. Well, whatever. So you used to date Kelly. Well, yeah, we dated. Actually, Kelly, Kelly claimed, claimed. And good friend of her, good friends back in Australia always know Kelly is the girl that ran around my house party claiming she popped my cherry.

I did. So you went, shut your face and this is my eighth of you Kelly. Joe. Joe. You stop cock blocking what we're trying to get to. All right. Now any of you guys have any questions go ahead you shut your face because you get you trying to so she you're a virgin. That's right. She wasn't coming on. Joe, of course, Australian, of course. Well, he's Australian. So for what Australian to say that to another?

I don't know. Do Australians, men have cherries? Yeah. Is it like backwards? Is it like backwards? So Lewis, do you want to just club them over the head with Combin no, no, no, I'm waiting here. Does that one here? Okay, Kelly's back it oh

I don't like it look it up the asshole. Are you not enough for me? So you were you a virgin I was yes you were virgin and she was the first girl Yeah, at first I was actually was on a on what you quote here a bean bag you Yeah, we go, we invented them. So that's like, yeah, there you go. Stop acting like your shit's different. Everything you have is from us. And then he realized that it was Kelly's back the whole time.

Oh, that might be it. It was even a, it was even a beer branded bean bag. It was a baby bean bag. What is, is Kelly a waitress and a fucking truck stop who gets banged on a bean bag twenty and he was at college he was twenty and she was in college do you think caleo is fucking bangin things back then

busses she was fat so she had lower self-esteem you want to eat right he's gonna throw in this point of rock that's the only thing she could fit in I'm gonna throw it on this pile of rocks. That's the only thing she could fit in Tell me how many dudes in your bank at that point just two two other guys no that night No, the one's over there. The Abba. Oh, no. So you wouldn't bang an Abba, racist. All right, I know you have. You've never banged an indigenous Abba,

and not by Regini. You've never banged a dude with a ranch. You look at her. You know what's so funny? As if you look at her face, that's the face she made is the equivalent of asking a white girl in the 50s if she banged a black. They got real.

She was like, no. No, it doesn't. So you, you, you, you, you was your first time having sex. It was with Kelly. Yeah. Now was it good? Well, shut up. Well, I just want to, was it good?

I'm, I'm going now. I'm not sure how good it is. No. No. No. No. No. I'm not welcome, Bobby.

Impossible. I'm going to fucking Australia. Yeah. I'm not welcome Bobby I'm gonna fucking Australia I'm married It wasn't too like sevinie is lighter than I Took a while with the horror city This is the straightest gated I've ever met my entire life It's the accent me and for Treeshoot's talking about this all the time the accent you can't like we just talk about How do you tell if a Japanese dude's gay.

I want to suck a yoko. That's it. I only like a dick. You don't have to ask him. We used to go like this. You'd be like dude, you like tits? I don't like a tits. You like, uh, you like some pussy?

I find a pussy. You're gross. You like some like some pussy Like some I want to suck them some balls I didn't know it was fucking gay either that's crazy. He's so good looking to and I thought I Was I was comfortable with my straightness a That's a good looking dude. Australian good for him. Not funny, he's gay. I'm questioning if I'm fucking gay, I've known him. What's going on here?

No question. You roll a bladey guy. You roll a bladey to your. You know that lads of men. Yes. I like the fact that he hit like a Joe Saw Lewis on the Royal Blitz. He's like, oh, I'm going to be short.

No, that's Royal Blitz. He was taking pictures of my cock. Why don't we just happen right now? You sizing up Lewis? You're not your own, you're not your own. This is here's the deal, you're the alpha male, whatever, as soon as you told him to stop you with, okay. I mean, you're in charge, you're in charge of Joe, right Joe?

So you're gay. Can I just say something, I'm very excited about this. You're the first legitimate gay guy that we've had on the show. legitimate gay guy. Well, we had a Gmail. All right. That's a woman. That's a saying woman.

Yeah, thanks. She's smoking hot. Uh, with a huge, nice gorgeous penis. I would say perfect cock. It's a nice cock. Pogging at the bottom. She's got a great cock. If I had that cock, I wouldn't do comedy.

I'd be, I'd be okay. If I had that, I wish I had her cock. I have a fucking. She's got a great cock. If I had that cock I wouldn't do comedy. I'd be I'd be okay if I had that I wish I had her cock I have a fucking like just a guy cock like my cock is like any cock in an orgy Generic what just a generic dick. It's not too small. We go what the fuck or it's not too big We like what the fuck it's just there's another dick You know what I mean? You have a regular size cock, right? Right now, Soda's got a big dick. I piss next to Soda once and anytime I piss next to my friends,

I purposely look at their dicks. Oh man. Hang on, Joe, can we have a ruling? Put this guy's back on it. Yeah. There's nothing gay, it's funny. And I looked at Soda's dick. He's got a big, what am I saying?

That's, there's nothing not gay about pissing at a urinal and peeking at your friend's car. Dude, whatever, do me and my friends we fucking, we really, we, Not you and your friends, you and like one other. No, me, me, Big J and Justin, we have like, gay off. Yeah, that's me. That's, that's, that's a gay couple.

That's called a threesome. Just a silver, my new friend, the host of Dogs in the City, who's the greatest dude ever. Anyway, good. Yeah, he's a gorgeous gay man. It's beautiful. And he is very gay, definitely. He's totally gay.

How do you think he got that gig? Blue a dog. I'm Justin. And all of a sudden, I know everything about dogs. Last week he was boxing. I'll do whatever I have to do to get on fucking TV. He's become famous. Fuck him, dog whisper in my ass.

He can't walk dogs. I could do that. Give me eight dogs and eight leashes and I'm, what I got to show. Dude, dog editing, all you got to do is fucking be like, there's a bad dog, I mean, take a picture of him sleeping. I'm very happy for Justin, but there's no way he's gonna say he's gonna seize a Milan a fucking rock while that cocks. I could get to the room If it's anything but a silky or a fucking

Beefron Frues or whatever the fuck Don't free shit. There you go. I really like that you just said rock while they're like a Jamaican lady like you'll put him in the room with a Rotway that Ding in cool coming out and different Sir, he actually watched the show CBS. It's coming out. I can't this how fucking crazy the business is he's gonna be Huge, yeah, it's over. It's over. Yeah, it's my good friend. I love that guy. Yeah, every that's to that's the thing too It's like September 11th when that happened dude. I was there the day before I was gonna be there Everybody has a fucking tower story that I almost died too Everybody's gonna be

What's your name again? K Joe Was was is a ruling place. Yeah, I don't know you can get into another bed naked with other I'll tell you guys gorgeous fucking Contact I don't even look at other guys dicks at the urinal. I don't even know that'd be fucking big It's your gaiting trying to look at dick. I'm trying to be funny. I'm like, oh look at Dancer He's got a big floppy dick Okay, Joe do I need to rule it? No, what happened was me

Wait a minute! Wait a minute Lewis! It's fucking gay! I'm not gay at all! Listen, let's stop fighting it! You know what? In his culture they're not allowed to be gay. So he's just like, he's like, hey we're at the barbecue Let's go blow each other! No way!

I don't know, I like that though. If I really turn the Mexican, he go, I ain't, I ain't not neat, deep. I ain't like deep. No, Nate, I want to ask you a question. Do you look at your friends' cocks at the urinal? No, but can we, did you compare Justin to getting this show to 9-11?

LAUGHTER Maybe. Ah! Shit! Shit! He really just got you right between the eyes of the house. And the way and his southern accent just made it sound like you're on Patreon. Which was worse, 9-11 are this. It was more mad about.

I tell you this. It hurts. Him getting his own. My show just got canceled on CBS. And I was a glorified extra this one has its own commercial and then here's the thing those dogs I'm even the ones he wants They're like can't pretty boy those dogs have the same job as you want to see Those dogs are working No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no going door to door, sliding everyone's throats and they just sort of push. He's got a pounding his feet.

There's people in the neighborhood. Well, when we did it, you're fucking apartment. Your wife was underneath us, it didn't matter. Now there's a studio. I didn't realize I couldn't have fun. I mean, that may not have fun. You can have fun. You weirdo.

I didn't say, I jumped up and down. I pound my feet sometimes. Yes, because you're an animal. That's the same way a fucking me and negligible. Columbus Zoo, the apes were acting the same way a little bit better Racist the way he said that I think I think that first of all the apes I'm very I'm very happy for Justin. I'm like that We're getting a little sidetracked off of you being gay. We're gonna get back to that

But I think and with sidetracked off of her fucking smelly one of your old box I checked off of her fucking smelly one of your old box beanbag beanbag pussy over here we're going backwards we're going to go we're going I'm taking control we're going back we're gonna go back to fucking first off we're gonna justin I'm very happy for my love Justin and he he he he really does love dogs And he's got a great show, but that's why I love this business. You never know when your fucking your ship's gonna come in. You never know when someone's gonna go you and you're in. So I love the Justin gotta show.

He's a fucking great looking dude. Great guy, really good Joe. He's Joe DeRose's friend. I don't know if you knew that. What, we're all friends with Justin. We're all good friends with him. I know that's the way everybody talks about Justin. My friend Justin. No, we're all good friends with Justin were all good friends with him. I know that's the way everybody talks about Justin. My friend Justin.

No, we're all with him. We're all good friends with Justin. I know him too. No, we don't know like you know him. You don't, but here's the deal. You don't fucking introduce a guy as my friend Justin. When you know the guy you're telling it to, is friends with him too.

Well, he's not friends with you. Yeah, we are friends with him. He told us he doesn't like that. That's not good friends with him. Now it, he's not friends with you. Yeah, we are friends with him. He told us he doesn't like that. That's not good friends to be on with him. Now it makes sense then. Okay. Kelly, there's water underneath the table. Can you pass it out to everybody?

And can you make sure that you write it down on that fucking new list that everybody has a drink before the show? I have everyone has a drink. Yeah, thanks. Bobby's getting the pound in. Bobby, I'm really off my game Welcome back to Bob and the monster what I want that that's all I could God you it's your show, dude. No, it's not it fails miserably. I told you I know leads I'd love to take over right now

Give me the opportunity. Do you wear a weed deodorant? No, I know it just smells like bots. Listen, here's a deal. I think that I think that you honest to God, I think that you have some gay in you. No, I don't. Not that you want to fucking, you know, I think that you would, you would lie with a guy, you would hold a man, you would actually jerky, come with another man. I don't say, I'm not saying that you would suck him off or what I think that you would come with another man. I don't say I'm not saying that you would suck them off or what I think that you would come with another man. Whether it be you bulked jerk off lying on each other's sides, something, something you

would do something with in the man. No, and I'll tell you, this is your, I actually have a whole, like, five minute bit about this. Let's not get into that. Let's not pour the people. Let's say this is a comment on Alicia. I'm not walking you in. I'm not a bionality. I heard you like to suck off. I haven't heard the bit and you already need to tighten it up if it's five You even get to do it because you don't even get five minutes on

I don't know. Do you even get a duke? You don't even get five minutes on stage. Is swinging the hammer today? Oh man, it's a fire. It's a thord of 18. I'm just glad he's not on me. There's cocks out. I'll take you down a notch. So you can burn it to some temporal length of the scene. You don't love him, Mary.

Don't run. You don't lock America. You think gay should marry. Oh, I see what you're saying. You are saying that Obama is a Muslim. I'm saying Obama's a Muslim. I think Rick Perry was the greatest candidate ever. You can hate the guy away. I'm gonna show you right now.

Stair. So, so what you're five minute bit on how you're not doing. Well, do it. Do it. Do it if you were gonna do it on TV. No, I'm not doing the bit. I'm telling you, me and my friends will joke around like we're gay if it's funny.

Like the sort of Justin. Do you have a single example? Dude, Big J went to the bathroom. Okay, we went, we were, I'm gonna be cool, Doc. This is gonna be great, just to tell you what he's like. So Big J turns around. Justin and I start blowing each other. Cause it's funny. I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, I went, Exactly. I don't like Big J that much. Justin is everybody's good friend now. Now that he's gonna be a big,

and here's what I was exaggerating on purpose. To be funny, you get it, right? Yeah, and we're doing the same thing now. I'm trying to break the fourth wall. What are you doing? What are you doing? Yeah, don't break the fourth wall. I'm not breaking the fourth wall.

You're gonna burp Reynolds smash. He breaks the smash, everything. How great was that when Bert used to just look in the camera? Smile, smoking the band. And then take off, it was the best. He smashes everything. How great was that one? Bert used to just look in the camera smile smoking the band and then take off. It was the best. Anyways, so you so big J every time we go on the road, he doesn't shit in public. So we wait until we get to the hotel room. So we had to take a shit. No one should shit in public.

It's a legal. Why would you not just wait? I'm a public bathroom. You get it. So if you're going to hold the hotel room, why would you not like like? What? No, what I don't know why I don't know why that's not the point. You wanted to do that. What take a shit in the public. You

should hold it. So Justin and I have a moment alone. Why don't you shit with us at a mobile? You know what you're doing? Yeah, if big J want shower and gas station, we wait for you to go to the hotel, to shower the gas, these are just normal like, now find a thing of shit, I'm going to take a shit in the gasses yeah well it's a second of founding well that's what we're trying to get to we're trying to get back here don't think we're not getting back to you and you're flappy I'm just gonna talk about big J so next

so I don't like the Kelly is looking sexy today I never look at Kelly hang on let me says I never look at Kelly she does in a good way and nothing for me, sexually. She's like my little sister. You know what I mean? That's what they all say. That I'd fucking demolish. If she could keep her mouth shut and not tell my wife.

Listen, I'm kidding. I'm kidding. You know what I'm saying? Kelly usually looks like a divorced lady that's just trying to get her husband to pay alimony Came in wearing makeup and it's like you know why she has one little fucking autistic kid. Yeah, she's like yeah Just plays with an ass after sketch all day Tell me like it's like winter Kelly and summer Kelly winter Kelly's like fucking kind of dumpy and boring

And summer Kelly's like fucking kind of dumpy and boring. And Summer Kelly's all hot and half naked. Jesus. Yeah. I like it. All right. Oh, that's fast out. Fucking neat, neat, neat sniper, neat,

didn't even pull the trigger. And didn't waste the bullet up. He just rolled his fucking red neck around. It's causing ice. There's little marbles just went around. I'm not gonna pull the trigger on that motherfucker. Kill himself. Living suffering enough for him.

Gageo go. No kidding. All right, so Lewis's story was... Yeah, it's not... Jay's in in the bathroom and me and, me and fucking Jay, me and Justin were like, dude, it'd be funny if we just got naked and lied in the bed together. So when Jay came in in the bathroom, stop. Gay Joe, uh, one to ten, I'm just gonna ask you one to ten.

How gay is that? That's like a night point five to nine. It's just funny. Stop, stop, go. Okay. So that you're naked in the bed, go. Yes, we're naked in the to non. It's just funny. Stop, stop, go. Okay, so then you're naked in the bed, go. Yes, we're naked in the bed, and here's the thing. Stop, go.

No, no. It's pushing to a non with your feet. Oh, god. Oh, shit, dude. Now, when you're touching each other, stop, wait, yes. This is important. When you're lying in the bed, are you on your side

or on your back or on your belly? We're both on the back on the same bed. Both our are you man? That's right. No, no I was on my belly. He was on his back Oh He goes hate what we'd call a pair of bottom We call that presenting you are presenting your pieces He didn't want to fuck Kelly he was presenting He goes, will Killy. So listen, so you're presenting.

Yeah, I'm face down as up as they say. You don't think this is gay. Yeah, it's gay, but it's funny. That's why it's funny. You're the girl you're getting ready for it. Shit, you're the bottom. No, I was just sitting with fucking face up. And then we wait, here's what what's funny though Jay takes extremely long

Shits so he was in the bathroom for like a half an hour And it's working on Comfort like I'm trash Jay in this He's funny took a long shit because we had to lay there like naked with each other and he's a straight man Because he takes long straight guy shit Trucker burps. Yeah, he's not in there trying to get shit out of his ass. Like you're fucked up. Put something in it.

And you don't see how this is funny. Listen, hang on, hang on, homo. I'm not that way. No, I just respect. No, I'm not. Listen, listen, gay, gay Joe. Official title. I love the color of gay Joe.

Listen, so now he's in the bed. It's over. It's not a minute. It's not two minutes. It's not even five minutes. It's like 30 minutes. It's 30 minutes. It's 30 minutes. It's 30 minutes. He's presenting. Okay, Justin is, uh, what would you call that? Peacocking?

What would you call that? Didn't you, didn't you think at one point, like 15 minutes in, like, this is the joke's done? Yeah, no, no, no, like we did. And they're like, well, now we're, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no All right, listen, we're just trying to get to the bottom. Oh! Oh! That's why he's the host. That's why they pay in the big bucks.

Um, huh. Dang, just wanted to smash you, bro. I was like, oh, yeah. All right, listen, so you're, so you're, so you're 30 minutes into this. So we go, let's go to 22 minutes in. All right. You're on your belly naked, right? Are you half full not full little mushy? No, this is actually I don't want to throw Justin out of the bus here But did he was like dude would be really funny if we if we got hard

Why I think Justin's gay because he said this and I was like no dude that would be funny I love you, a fucking crazy man. Hot call, look at all, huh? Do you go to therapy? I did, yeah, for a little while. They like naked together, I don't know. Look at all that. I'm just screwed.

Something about Lewis's story that's getting me uneasy, like sounds like the stud of like a pitiful story. No, because you guys are making a bad way. Let's get out of your side. It was just a funny story before. First of all, we didn't fucking make the story up. You're telling the story and you're somehow making yourself the victim. I'm out of victim. It's funny It's a funny story dumps now Justin wants to get hard

I don't even want to do any of this game I'm just fucking fine. Well, here's the funny the funny story. Do you know you can actually we're being funny now and no one has the cock You got it. You can do it. Jesus. What the fuck, that one? It really is like a biker's girlfriend. She's saying, you're gonna be fun right now.

Everyone took their tics out and treated me like a piece of trash. I was in his one gay guy in the room to open up her fucking fucking bag. It's a bag bag over here. I get the bank bag, Jay. So, so the toilet flushes 24 minutes in. What are you thinking in your head? What are you adjusting talking about?

You guys, and by the way, if the thing is funny that you guys are naked under the bed, you could still wear your underwear. No, no, no. We're on top of the bed. Like, we're both on top. There's no covers? No, no, no. Stop, stop.

Really? Okay. I already thought you were on top of the covers thought you did you were on top of the covers I don't know what that's what a gay man would think So now that now that you know that I want to be so happy right now. I want to ruin What what was your response when he said let's get hard? I was like no dude. We're not gonna get hard Get hard No, dude, we're not gonna get hard Dude any literally in front of me worked up a half stiffy and what'd you do watch?

To the punch because he's a fucking sniper Dude my I'm gonna have a pain in my chest No, die on me, Bob. Don't you go dying on? I'm not paying in my just Die on me Bobby don't you go die? You keep the shit rolling You do not stop you record everything and then you get me in the ambulance No the ambulance I need an ambulance someone called ambulance

God listen to me look Yes you watched. You watched the guy next to you for shitting girls. You're naked on your first of all, you're naked on your belly, which makes your ass. Not this point I might have covered up

a little bit just because we're there for so long. With what? With like a cover or something? I don't know. Justin's mouth. No, you're not, you're not editing this. So you're lying on the bed naked.

He's naked, no covers. Working up on Cippy. So you're lying on the bed naked. He's naked, no covers. I'm top. He says, I bet I could get one. He starts working out more. OK, and you're watching. You're like, hey, yeah, see if you can get it. No.

Are you encouraging like trying to get a friend? No, no, in my mind. Look, here, my hands warm. No, in my mind, I was like, I can't wait to tell this on the podcast one day. And here I am today. So in your mind, you were thinking that you, this is, this is, this is funny.

It's just funny to me. Right. It's funny. The whole thing's funny. Okay. So that's around 22 minutes in. He's like, let me get a heart on. Let me see if I can work on that. No, that might have been way earlier. That might have been pretty cool.

I'm gonna have like a minute in. So, so I want to know around 24 minutes in, when you know Jay's still in there, you're both, we were pretty frustrated. So you're frustrated. That's why I couldn't do it all right now. We know you're frustrated. Backed up.

So now you're naked on the back. Backed up, he said. Yeah, we heard it. We have headphones on. What are you, a fucking shitty audience member? That is true. He basically is. It's funny because it's true.

He's watching, he said it's true He's watching him Around 20 I'm talking 28 minutes in you know that it's been a long time you both been naked are you comfortable at this point? No, it's extremely uncomfortable, but I will I'm talking about you're not Andy Kaufman. I'm this is years ago This is like what are you what the fuck are you about? For 30 minutes being naked next to your friend, one on your belly, one on your back. Well, the first five minutes was just so okay, how funny it's gonna be when Jay walks out

and we're just in the bed naked. Right, not after that. I don't know, dude, the fucking weather. I don't remember what we were talking about. So you just randomly brought up a little one. This wasn't as big of a deal in my life until you made it to this big of a deal. Well, cause it should be a big deal.

Let's ask Joe what his first Gay experience was and see how much matches To this good thing Joe a K a G Joe My first gay experience That accident first of all the Australian accent now I get it. It's just gay Yeah, that's why you didn't know he was gay because the Australian accent is fucking gay. My first experience.

That's why I was opening for big J. I was in a hotel room. He's taking a home dump truck. No, I'm not going to share that. I'm not going to. No. Oh, yeah. I was working in a bookstore and you blew a guy in a bookstore. Oh, yeah, pretty much.

Really? All right. Go ahead. It's my first store. I'd love to hear this. Your first gay experience, pretty much really all right. Go ahead. It's my industry. I'd love to hear this your first gay experience. I'll tell you mine. Go ahead No, I was working at a bookstore and customer kind of just hit on me So we went to the toilets and just fooled around the toilets the toilets the bathrooms was at a bathroom with one person can Poo a P at one time or is it like ever there was other cubicles so other people can go in So yeah, so you know some guy in there who's trying to take a dump for ages. Oh, that guy is scarred for life. That was big Jay. He's like, God, he's like, fuck any fucking eat. Weirdly, I got to eat better. It's like he put a bathroom in the bathroom and he was in the bathrooms. So what? Jay was in the bathroom and then

he was actually in bathroom. So it's not, it's not about five of a set. Yeah. So you, so you went to a bathroom. There was a guy actually taking a shower. No, I was joking. There's no one else. Sorry. I was talking about this gay stuff. Yeah, we're trying to find out if we're all gay here And you are really taking a show in the wrong direction. No, you have it. No, you've taken in the right direction We've never had a legitimate gay guy on the show. I've been on three times I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared.

I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared.

I'm getting a little bit scared. I'm getting a little bit scared. got to do what you wanted to do sexually. You fantasized about it, you've wanted it. Sorry Joe, I'm just asking. No, you sure you see, this is a big moment when you finally- While you were banging Kelly, you were thinking about it. Kelly was warm up. You're trying to use her fat, make her pussy into an ass. E-Far push it, just like this. It looks like a retarded little boy.

I'm right, I gave you the gift of gay Joe and now that's how you repay me We're not I mean we're not stepping on you Not at all. Oh, yeah, I'm sure Joe's face fine. He's fine. I'm just protective It's I know you are cuz it's your fucking gay friend that you fuck Cuz you raped this guy in college you don't want to be done about it turned him and now you feel bad I was passed out on a beanbag Look at these I look at these I got some pride on a beanbag Let me just squirt on top of him hold these Doritos in my hand

Yeah, hold on how this piece of sausage keeps sleeping out of my hands But it's just greased enough for these sausage Damn you don't even gonna know what to eat Fuck you out there Alright so now you're in the bed You're lying in the bed with Jay with Jason He put work down the couch

Justin, whatever the fuck Good friend, good friend You're naked, he worked up a hard on You got past that Then you just lie in there You got to the point where you got a little cold so you put a little piece of cover over your ass Jake Vogue He take put jokingly take We're committed to this so now you've seen his cock. Oh, yeah

you've seen his cock. Oh yeah. Oh, that was a big time, everyone. There's even more. I know another story. There's a point. There's a word. Jay comes out and has sex with both of them. Yeah, I'm trying to get a lot of stories for it. Hey, it's not even like Tyler Dirty. You would be excited all along. You're joking. Jason is on room. He knocks on the door. He's like, we're not even sharing rooms with the guy. Lewis just lied to Justin.

And make Jason the bastard. And that's the road gig, y'all, on that three of you off to share a room. Like, who books that gig? Yeah, though. You can bring everybody, that three of you off to share room like who books that game Yeah, like you can bring everybody, but y'all got to share over who was on the who shared the bed? You got you yeah, obviously you shared a bed with Justin. Yeah, it's not obvious dude I've I've been on him road gigs and I've never shared a bed with a nice I should have been with Nate on the last road gig

Hey, but Nate's not gay. I'm a gay. He's a girl. He's a cousin. He's a cousin. He's a cousin. He's just a cousin. He doesn't get weird.

Hey, by the way, we're going to see how powerful Justin is when he did get spot guess will not get released because we talked about Justin. No, wait, because he's got these gonna call for that show and be like, You're gonna see how in CBS is gonna go, Bobby, do you want your show back on or not? You're gonna see how unpalveled this show actually is. When this has no effect on his career. What?

What? Just, yeah. You're passing away. That's it. We're not even gonna, you can jolate off of the show. That's right, nothing. That's it.

So, so here, whatever, 30 minutes in here, the toilet flush, and then you're dick and talk. You know it's almost game time. Now you both are dick and talk. Game time. It's almost time. But Louis starts wiggling his butt like an excited dog.

He's like, you're so cool. He's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, he's like, you're coming. He's not presenting. Let me get the pillow. Put it in my stomach. I don't want my lower back. Oh my god.

It's flush. It's flush. It's flush. He's the shower girl. It's flush. It's flush. It's flush. It's flush. It's flush. Flush to flush loose. Then he is the shower guy Losing he is a toilet flush his dick gets out his ass Like when a dog hears a key being put in the door. It's like

I guarantee you as a pink little lipstick like a cocktail So you so the road rocket So you Flush and you know, Jay's coming out. Do you guys get excited that it's going to happen? Yeah, this is the point where like, it's time to do something. Okay, what do you do?

You've been sitting for half hour. Oh my god. Yeah, we assume the position. He gets back on his back. I lay on my stomach. Did he walks out? He literally, he waited. He gets back on his back, you said?

I'm maybe, I don't know. I don't know where I'm going. Wait a minute. No, dude. You have to be specific. Yeah, because there's two guys made it back. One of them is very specific. Now you're saying that one's not back on his back. Where was he? That he was not on his back. Is you're on your belly. So therefore with love. All right. All right. our positions broke and we got back to position. Okay, where did the positions? I don't remember. We weren't touching each other.

All right, wait a minute. Where was it that the positions broke? What do you mean? Where did he go? Did Justin come? Well, I mean, no. Who? Who?

Did he have to go run to get a towel did it did was your phone call? Were you talking I don't remember did the probably all that happened all that probably happened okay? So we got on all therapists would call this repression So all right, so now J's coming out the door is opening door door open the toilet flush you wiggle your ass Justin get Justin get the hard on you guys are ready to go Justin fixes his hair you adjust as your baseball cap what Jay walks out looks at us doesn't say anything goes insist in the chair lights And then he goes

Go slow. I just want to get a cigarette. I want you to go real slow. So that's the best of it. It didn't work. So Big J pulls down his fucking hot topic shorts. It's Janko Jean shorts. Takes off his mitten and starts jerking himself off and watching you. That's basically what happened.

Really. So that's it. Now how uncomfortable was it when he didn't put you close it was brutal that's it that of loose half an hour no reason naked for no fucking pay off at all jay got the pay off j1 that one

oh well so that one gonna pay off did uh tell the there's another one yeah the first of all i want to see because you're on your belly i guarantee there was a spot of pre-com from lying there Lumpin up and then it's un plumping plumping and un plumping not a full orgasm just the preaches where he wiggles around on the Comfort Ernie's like I kind of felt good. I know a story. I think has your tongue ever touched a guy's part I know this story too.

I love how fucking sonner Nate is. He wouldn't even say cock. He goes with guys parts. Now I this will be dirty enough about you putting your tongue to someone's god parts. Please explain. It's not exactly as clear kind of as he fucking says it. Okay. Did your tongue touch a guy's cock? It's not exactly as clear cut as he fucking says it, okay?

Did your tongue touch your tongue? Ball. One ball. This is turning into a very special, you know what I'm talking about. I did not lick a guy's ball. I touched my tongue to a guy's ball like that. Which guy? Which guy was it?

I just realized that I'm throwing my friends under the bus right now. Look, it's always me Not throwing him under the bus because he got his balls like me big-jane Justin We had we have like gale of competitions. Let me ask you a question. Did you do it to save somebody's life? No, did you do it to save the country? No on 9-11? I'll just think I'd show Justin get his show because he like balls Justin got a show. Justin got a show because you look balls. No, okay.

So there was no pet. I didn't like balls. I touched my tongue. You wouldn't know this. Like what? Like you were tasting salt? Like somebody dared me to touch my tongue to the ice cold pole outside of my elementary school.

Right. And it did it get stuck in the fire department. I had to take it off. You started licking really fast You touched it. Why did you touch your guys balls? It was just it was it was it was it was we were having a gale of competition. It was in front of a bunch of people It wasn't just I was there alone. Yeah, a lot of people Can't say the comic was did you do anything? No, you know, don't say it like you just would I'm from a royal family. I'm jerked off to dudes a ski pool

Have you ever done have you ever done anything gay? No, look at me. Look at me. No, I know you first of all know you go to therapy. And I go in while you're there and I listen. Well, then you find out that I have a rabbit addiction to alcohol. No, I'm kidding. Do you ever touch the man's cock? No, I don't kiss the guy. No, I'm a kiss the guy. Do you have a guy touch your cock? Nope. You have a jerk off with another dude in the kidding. Do you ever touch the man's cock? No. Have you ever kissed a guy? No. Do you have a guy touch your cock? Nope.

You have a jerk off with another dude in the room. Yes. Come on. I mean, I shared a hotel room with a person before. No, have you ever done a circle jerk? No. When you be in. No.

Second Jack. You just say really? Lewis is like, that's impossible. Everybody's a circle jerk. No, I've never done a circle jerk. I have an apple to say. What's a circle jerk? It's when you're like if we were in the room right now and if you weren't here And it was all of us. I you jack off in together. Let me finish the fucking thing you asked me you fucking talk over person

Yeah, we all you don't have to jerk each other off. Like that's, you could do that one. Oh, that's not great. No, no, no. But when you all just jerk off together, and just in a puddle. I play it, okay, cookie. Okay, cookie, cookie. I play it, okay, cookie.

Hang on, we're gonna get to it. Usually when you, usually when you search jerk, hang on, hang on, hang on, one second. Usually when you search jerk Kelly, it's in a young age, that when guys are discovering sex, and you don't know, it's not like at 18, it's usually yet like 11.

It's like 11. Is it a competition as soon as it comes first? And your body's 38. It's not your body. It's your uncle. And he says, if you guys don't do shirtless hugs, that you guys aren't gonna be friends anymore. What was the one that you just said Lewis?

Okay, what's that one? That's where you get together with a bunch of dudes. You circle, jerk, but there's a, it's a game now. Yeah, you put a cookie in the middle of it. When he did it, it wasn't a game. Yeah, we call it, yeah, we call it Sogi Biscuit. So you can see it. I mean, you all jerk off on the cookie.

And I just, the, the, the fucking relationship between a, a, a, a gay Joe and now gay, dumbass is the gay dumbass. It's a parallel man. You're really trying to send it to this disc, can't wait. The thing is Joe, it's his life and you, it's just a game, everything's a game to you. You add game in front of everything that you like doing.

Now it was just a lifestyle, the joke, the only difference. Yeah. Joe's like, actually, it was really lovely. We went on a date and then we we We met love we started with a mushy biscuit We could she is biscuit This is like all right, so we were born So then we moved on from mushy to a soppy flip flop. So we did have you guys ever played karaoke?

Where you take your friends dick and you rock like it's a microphone? You know, you've never done karaoke. And at the end of the song, you just start sucking it. It's called the finale. And if he jizzes, you win. What the fuck? I was like 12 or whatever. Me and my friends, we fucking played a...okey on the cake. What is the okay? Well actually, we never cut you in. We were motivated to play this game. We didn't need a cookie So you guys were too poor to play the actual You had to he had to get chocolate I love the thought of them going through the pantry Trig off on a cookie. Let me see what I got no cookies, but I got I got

I got I Have cooking chocolate. It's not sweet. I mean, it's like completely. Yeah, it's like what they use and cake Do you guys want to use that and then I was just like whatever? Forgot whatever you She's our hand I got a TV guy whatever Okay, on the TV I know that Joe is something we're doing the same thing, but a little more sophisticated.

Yeah. So you jerk off on the cookie and whoever comes last has to eat the cookie. It's revolting. Dude, do you ever played it? No. How do you know what sloppy biscuit is? I know. I'll bet.

Cause that's what they look down on in the gay community. They're like, oh, god, she has to play. Did you guys play soggy biscuit? You guys, there's some real facts. I mean, I literally will take on three guys at a time, but that's the gay I should have ever heard of. Yeah, I don't mix food and come. Okay, first off, there's I.

Yeah. That's really gay. Car of all, Joe. Yeah. How long have you been gay? I've been out as gay since I was, so, about four years. Four years you've been out. Yeah. How old are you? 30. Don't be out of me. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm just sucking a dude off in a bookstore's bathroom. Is A.G. sensitive topping for you? I don't want to step on any toes. How old are you?

So wait a minute, did you know you were gay before that? Here you go, let it out. Let it out. Make me a man. That's right, go. That's right, go. That's right, go. Go ahead, guys.

Go ahead, buddy. Everybody, not a question. There was not a question you could ask and that you weren't going to get to the end. No, that's brutal. No, look, I want to know if you knew you were gay when you're No, I do hang on a second Kelly. Can you get us some music up? Really Madonna maybe

Some Adele Just should not be on radio Should be on a seat. You belong my voice. I know Con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Spectacularismos, lincones de película y un sincindia aventuras desesperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de madrida murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com Time fucking joke sometimes they fall flat Louis Louis is that his new gay name? New name is Louis Vuitton. No, I call it's Louis Gagomus

So Louis as you ask whatever you want to ask gay Joe go ahead I already asked I really ask another one So Joe how big is your dick? Not you know actually I want to ask a question kidding. I want to ask everyone else a question. Is it gay? Like, all right, dude, yes. Who else? You are. No, Bobby, would you, if you had to, if you had to have sex with the dude, had to.

You got it. Well, you've you really had to, somebody gone to your head, dude. Yeah. Would you rather have sex with an unattractive dude or an attractive like Dom Delewies or Brad Pitt? Who would you choose? I don't know you both I never work that scenario out my head on the bus Well, I realized I would probably rather have sex with a good looking dude. And is does that make me a little gay?

I kill it Kelly Huh, I hit that for a second. I'll tell you what to play the next. I'm gay if this is. Come on. I have a lot of gross belly button. Oh yeah. This is the lowest. No, I stop here. No. I'm so happy.

So happy. So happy. All right. The end of the row. The end of the row. Bobby looks like he's dancing with his handbags in the middle of the circle. You know, in the Alps out.

I can gay dance with it. I can gay dance with it. Ah. Fat Kelly and Robert would have had a good dancing session in the day. You have belly button just fucking turn me off. It's gonna be a good day. He's got his belly button and looks like it is a go-to. Like from his hair. His belly button looks like a little baby girl vagina

Killed the gay and me you welcome welcome back That's all I got to do whenever you start getting off like hey Did you not have a belly button and they had to make one? So you're really falling apart dude so to become a giant one day, like after you got on this pocket, he was like in shape. He's like a no severing shape. You played football, didn't you? If you think Louis for one second, we're going to go to off topic, helping you fucking coming out of the closet, you're out of your mind.

I'm doing this not only for you, but for your beautiful girlfriend who I love, who should be with a man, who should be with a man. Who should be with a man who likes women. She knows all this by the way. She's questioning my sexuality because of it, because I'm just fucking honest. Nobody, I would never, they're boyfriend in the ass with a dill.

Bobby, have you ever kissed a dude? No one really wants to. Can you ever kiss a dude honestly? Kissed it now. See that'd be gross. I would never kiss a guy. Well you have limits. You like pretty woman, I would not kiss a guy. Oh, you have limits

Like pretty woman. I would not kiss on the map. I'm a hooker. I'm a hooker. I'll suck it. They can are beat. I've never I've never kissed a man I've never Did Tranny no no, but you wouldn't I blow I blew a guy you blew a guy and I've talked about I've never heard this I Was I was I was I was I was fucking young. I didn't know what a day. I was young too. I'm 25 years younger than you All right, here we go shut your face, okay? I was I was it was fucking first second third for somewhere in there Maybe before that maybe I was molested by a dude in a closet for a fucking

Teabond, okay? It's not something that I was I had to be first before first grade somewhere it was a Another kid though. It was another kid me and him. He just made me it was kid shit when you suck it Dude's dick. You don't know I don't know what a was yeah, when you can actually reserve a hotel room with a credit card It's not yeah, yeah, when you're actually driving to the place You being a little weird I'm just being honest with you how to out the steak was good how did that dude get a steak? Oh, he's he wasn't young as me But he was a little older than me, but he was still young. He wasn't like a teenager I don't think he might have been 10 or something like that

But yeah, fucking he had steak and he was like, dude, you want to have a steak? I was like, yeah, he had it with him No, he had it. I trusted him. I Apparently Did he go do you want a steak and you go all right come on and he's like where are we going? Did he go do you want a steak and you go all right come on and he's like where are we going? You didn't even say I want to see the steak first Was it at school like was at his house? He had a house on the end of the block mom. I got to make Bobby a steak

You got that kid had to probably blow his dad all the time for stakes The price of a steak yes And I didn't like I didn't he didn't finish okay, thank god, well he couldn't he finished But it was like it was like air that came in your mouth Well, you know, he's the jerk off with my friend and it we nothing would come out on my ass It's gonna hurt, huh? It's kind of hurts Well, he would jerk it we nothing would come out on my end. It was gonna hurt. Huh? It's gonna hurt. Well, he would jerk off and shit would come out. He was older than me. And I would jerk off and I would pretend stuff came out. Whoa,

that's a weird. Like you have tooth face and go, Oh, it's red and blue. I put my hand to the like it became a little foamy. I mean, dude, look, I got some too. And he'd be like, Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He tastes. Not like cook. It's not like this. All right, then so I'll turn to me on. I'm not going to. So, so you just done a cookie. Yeah, and ate it. No, the loser had to eat it.

I was. I was. But I, I couldn't come at all. I didn't come. Everyone else just on the cookie. Joe, let me do you. You, I was cool. You made me the loser in that situation.

No, so I, I couldn't come, but I refused the cookie. And my friends actually got upset with me because I wouldn't need it. Yeah, you would have made them eat it. Oh, yeah, they would, I would have fucking shut the space into it. Let me ask you guys, so you're a fucking aggressive guy. Jesus, you are a bear.

You see that a handle bar mustache. You said, chaps. Lucia Gomez, the bear. Lucia, the bear go face. So you can't, all you're in a room and you guys the bear. It was the bear go face. So you can't all you you were in a room and you guys all came on a cookie. Yeah except for you except for me and you lost I lost and you wouldn't need the refused. Well, I was holding it.

It was it was like it was a chocolate like you know we have the variety packs. Yeah. So if I wouldn't known it was going to be a caramel I would have eaten it but you never know until you bite into it. So. Oh, that's funny. All right. So Joe look at I just get back to you bite into it, so. Oh, that's funny. Oh. All right, so Joe, look at how you just get back to you

for a second. Go for it. So you've been out of the closet for four years. Yeah. And now that you're out of the closet, is it that much better that you're out of the closet? Was it the same? Is it more taxing?

Or let me ask this question, is it kind of fucking anti-climactic? Like, it was kind of sexier being hidden Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was probably sexier being hidden like I was having sex with both guys and girls from the age of 20 So fucking spy yeah Working both sides Russian and American it was probably more exciting when I wasn't out and I wasn't like a big out out kind of mine was more like a well I probably should choose one and I'll resign to that so here's a deal see because I always wanted that like when you're in the

closet it's it must be a little like like wow nobody fucking knows and then you go and you're gonna fucking suck a dude off and he does nobody knows that you went and fucking you know like blue Lewis and a manly, right, but you know So so when so now that you're out it's it's pretty you just like yeah I'm gonna Yeah, I'm in a relationship now beforehand. It was kind of it was pretty cool when I first come out and I get to tell you straight mates Oh look, I just went to because I was I didn't really like going to gay bars and talking to gay guys And I just just just wasn't really into it. Yeah, just, I just wanted to have sex and then go.

Really? Now when you say sex, because this is what I learned too, cause I've had gay roommates and I was, as a guy from Boston, you know, we're fucking, you know, blacks and fags and fucking quits. Yeah, we're gonna just try. Yeah, we're brought up, we're brought up, like that. You're brought up like pieces of shit, all right?

We, uh, I take offense to that. You should. What I'm saying is is that when I found it some gay guys don't fuck some gay guys I mean what I mean what you know do you have use have sex sex or yeah, no, I would I say sex I mean sex like You know you have actual sex whereas some great gay guys do you think that oral and you know whatever else is snuggling snuggling They do it. Yeah, spawning and you know those guys fags. Yeah, they think they're the real fags No, because they kind of think if you if you blow then that's sex whereas for me, it's like no, it's gotta be It's going because no nonsense approach to gay sex. He's like so it's really nice to meet you, Joe I'm glad to be with you on the state first things first if we fuck we fuck

Joe, I'm glad to be with you on the state. First things first, if we fuck, we fuck. Shit, in butt, no questions asked. I'm not blowing you like some fucking hot tan figure. It's not, it's gonna be really worked out. I'm not some damn low brother. No, no. Backfuck, and I was being smashed, smashed. Forced is no fucking bug-wise.

This, what? This Australian Hulk smashes. Ha, ha, ha. Your accent's gotten better, Dan. That's because I've been on the phone with you No fucking bug wise. This is Australian Hulk smashes Axis gotten better Dan That's because I've been on the phone with you trying to figure out when to do this podcast I hate being on the phone with you, but I love you listen here's a deal. I hope you never make it I hope you're Stay here, but I love you listen here's a deal. I hope you never make it. I hope you're I Lose you Dan. I'm gonna fucking hate you I have to replace you with gay loose loose like

Hey boys It's just fast forward three years Oh Everyone fucking like the podcast. You know what dude? You know what dude? Yeah, we go rid of that fucking twang. Oh gross Smelling it up with her pussy His rollerblade wheels have lights in them. Oh glitter. He's got little fucking daisy duke sure Oh, you know, you know, you love to wear daisy dukes wouldn't you? No, no, no

Who is? All right. I love it goddammit. Give me a pair of these You have a little butt flat hanging out. All right, so we're want we're going back now We get a we got to go back to Kelly real quick now you Getting dug out on the bean bag You guys fucked yeah, you fuck what's it get it for a while? Yeah, we were you were dated yeah for a while now We got to do the gay scale with Lewis's story in Joe. Now, let me ask Nate on a Southern scale, being banged on a bean bag is about how Southern? It's pretty, you know, it's pretty seven. About seven? And it's in it's a beer

bean bag. Is that making like an eight, eight, five? Is it, uh, but is it a Budweiser? Yeah. It's a Victoria bit up which is like there that's like there that's like their natural light. Oh, is it in a dorm room and in a dorm room at college? Yeah, well now college night was fucking it up. I was just sticking to the I Just put on the phone to my dad We just fucking out Crazy on this podcast fuck you I think I started blowing you when you're on the phone Oh, he's on the phone. He's like yeah know, dude. No, you know, I got the chick. Thank you guys

Smell like poo She was the first from both sides really so so she blew you know Kelly's got a long checkered pass Wait, is this what happened to Kelly's got a long checkered pass. Wait, is this what happened to Kelly's asshole? No. No! Lewis is on fire. Money still game.

Flaming Lewis. He was just trying to work it out big, my dick was. It's just a viled question. Gay, Jay killed it. No, no, no. No, but seriously, I haven't. No, look, nothing's ever been at my asshole. I know, except blood.

Yeah. And it knocks up the doctor with a grimace on his face. And it's fingering your butt like, hooked in a medical profession for years. It's the grossest thing I've ever experienced. You're a fucking savage. Fucking colabé, Paul. They're drawing straws in the fucking break room with a hospital.

Like, yeah, I got a girl up there good as hell. It's a long time ago. What was more stubbly? She's got quite a rough tongue. So she's got, she's got, she's got, she's got, she bends what you're into. She's got an alligator skin tongue.

It was, he's not gonna remember, because it was 10 years ago and he's been getting Bashed like I'll never forget Dicks themselves like that a suck it. That was his 9-11. They can't do it to themselves Yeah, if you think scream. I'm not gonna stop this you're out of your fucking mind Kelly really is we've got her in the corner We need to find this out. Alright, breathe. And why are you so frustrated by him saying you gave a great blow job?

Because she brought that girl. That girl always gave good blow job. It's a via Zoom. I don't know when to stop. Yeah, no, they're greedy little piggies. They need their mouth filled with all the things. I can't leave you alone. I can't stand you on the phone.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's always fun now when someone's like on the fire and especially some probably you a key. Oh, yeah, lot so when you're with a guy Kelly You're with a guy and you'll you'll fuck it. I'm gonna slot out But I mean because you're not a slut when you're not with a guy, right? Right and you said that confidence She's dating 20 people right now But when you're with a guy, hey fuck it you went at it and And when you found that he was gay, did that flip you out? Or did you know?

No, no, he, uh, because he came out, we dated when I was like 20, and then he came out and you were like, get hold of your hair back when you're 20. 20, 20. He's like, oh, you have to be really good if you go to a really short haircut. But you brought your head to the side. No.

No, because he came out when he was like 26, 27, so we were long, long. She put a lot of men between me. Yeah Joe how long did Kelly wait to bang you After she knew you after she knew you It would have been like week week one or two She's yelling, you know. It would have been like week one or two. Wow.

We just took his virginity. We just tried. It's a whole, it's a whole. So we actually broke up just before my birthday. And then Kelly rocked up to my birthday, my 21st, looking incredible. And fat. But she was so skinny.

She crashed, she crashed, I did. And so she was skinny. She crashed she crashed odd Oh you and so she fucking showing what he missed out on your piece of shit And so she pretty much paraded around her my party And pretty much almost had six of them. Yeah mates. I'm the toilets there I didn't though you blue guys in the toilet. No, what happened? I went home with a guy from the best Does it matter to college stuff like I went? I mean so so let me I went home with a guy from the best To the medicine was college stuff like I

So, so let me Well that look at Kelly Kelly's not being honest right now, by the way I'm not a girl you're shifty and I was so honest. I was so honest. Yeah, you know what I know you know what I'm just cuz you were trying to get a date Let me tell you show those lips put probably Kelly's lips to I look at these sexy lips I Tastes put probably Kelly's lips to Yeah That's very good. Let's do you want to fuck it you backs out? You backs out Pilla let's go all right ready hold on

I'm so much fucking less gave in him he was and he went like this right at the last second. The winner! I did he winky you at the other eye where we can't see. He's like, yeah. But I heard him say inside his mouth like a rental acquist. Fuck man. The winner of gay chicken and definitely homosexual, Lewis. Wow. I was, I was, I was, if you're serious, I'm serious.

When we all leave, it's like, hey, Bob, Lewis We all leave it's like hey bother gweying back talk about hammer fist Here's a thing after the show nates the gay one. Yeah, it's his him and fucking gay Joe. It's just sucking Hey, man, I mean I got I got access to this place for like another hour Tell me about photography Man, I'm gonna do the South, but let me tell you something we've learned a lot since Obama came in Back to Kelly being a Raging boy Kelly we're all

We're else I didn't finish We did she talk over you when you dated? Constantly. She just yaps on me. Kelly, listen to me. We're all, I'm a fucking slut. Everybody's kind of slutty here. Yeah. And just because you're a woman doesn't make it different.

You were fucking a little horrid back in the day. Now you probably learn you lesson like all of us. Yeah. And you're a little more choosy with what you do when you do it. Correct? I'm very more choosy with my dick. Yes Who you know with not your dick with the dick? Well, when you refer to as the dick that sounds pretty or

Well, it's just fun But it's don't know about that much It's fun It makes me feel full She is fun. I love it. It makes me feel full Food so one word Joe do you have a boyfriend now? I'll do it. Yep. I'm sorry. Sorry, look Is that by me? I saw his face the sick. Lewis is I want to ask you a question as a dude right who likes dudes

Which is the name of the podcast can you write that dude like Would if you saw Lewis in a Skate shop, I don't know where you see those if you saw loose rollerblading down the street. Yes Would you would you think he's would you hook up with him? Would you one hook up with him two? Which is just fuck around in a bathroom to actually want to get to know him right or there's no three by the way by the way you know in my head right now Like if he says that he wouldn't do anything So no I reckon if we if we search other than the street we're probably just you know go on full-ran near a skip in somewhere Joe you don't like exchanging names either. No, I don't want to know and then Lewis would hit the wall and go you chill anybody

After he came Skates Plugging nights at the end What you get your you donkey get free. You got a big dick, Joe? No, when you think so, no. Kelly, no, you're not as Kelly, man. Sorry, you're right.

Kelly, nice dick, yeah. Is it nice? It's nice. It's just pleased, it's just thank you. That's like, it's like, it's as, as Napa gets you funny, he's nice. It's straight, and it's big, it's good. Straight, so is, what you like, straight, Dicks?

No, I don't know. It's not really straight. It doesn't matter. I don't know. I'm free, cheat out dick. No's good. Straight. So you like straight decks? No, I don't. It's not really straight. It doesn't matter. I don't know. I freak cheat out. No, there's sticks that are like a curved left or right, or ones that are like straight. Right. How many inches? Or whatever the, whatever your metric says.

You're not gonna call on me. I was just thinking in hand. Kelly, didn't, first of all, this is the first day that we had. I'm just gonna announce this. Hang on one second. This is the first day that we had these things'm just gonna announce this. Hang on one second. This is the first day that we had these things, right? And we're supposed to hang on. We're supposed to take a break around an hour in. We're way past there.

To thank the sponsors. I mean, he's eliminated. And she passed me a note that said 45 minutes. Which I blew over, because we're in them. But she still didn't say we have to take a break. You want me to say it? I'm going to have to do it. I'm going to.

I'm going to interrupt the flow of everything. It doesn't matter. Oh, let's take a break now. When I come back, I'll start. Keep on talking about clock. So you want to do it? That's pretty good. All right, fine.

That's how she gets her commercial. All right, fine. You got me. I love dikes. I love dikes. I like dikes. I like sausages. We get a food with cream.

Which you can't find anyway. I'll look everywhere I'll put you several different continents now sausages are filled with cream Are you a fat fuck have you ever been a fat fuck are you trying not to be a fat fuck? Well, I am for the sixth time in my life. How many fats have you had boys? I'm going to my third fat right now. And what fat are you on? I'm still one. I'm always, I'm just riding this out,

it's doing a half in man. But I do wanna, I'm pulling up for this first time myself. Yeah, Dan's got fucking, I have money for the first time in my life, fat. Oh, hey, yeah. That feels real good. He and his. We're in skinny jeans.

Kelly, what fat are you on? Number four. Number four, well, you know what, here's the problem, is when you're fat, you feels real good. He and his wearing skinny jeans. Kelly, what fat are you on? Number four. Number four. Well, you know what, here's the problem, is when you're fat, you have to move. That's, there's no way around it. You have to exercise. So what do I do?

I don't know how to move. I'm not, you know what I'm saying? That's what Kelly did. They get better in Australia. You have to move out of New York City. You too big? Well, I went to yowzerfitness.com and I got myself a folding fucking insane

Biscayne treadmill. This thing folds right up right away straight up. Not at an angle that still takes up a shitload of space It folds straight up. One of the only treadmills out there that goes straight up on itself and it wheels around So it's good for New York City apartment. So you have a limited space and you want it just to go away the apartment, so you have a limited space and you want it just to go away. Yowzer Fitness.com. They're unbelievable. And right now they're running deals. There's like 75% off their treadmills. I got a $2,500 treadmill for $1,000.

It's unbelievable. So go to Yowzer Fitness.com. I'll call them or email. They have a chat right on the website. If you go between 8 and 5 in the day, you can actually with somebody ask for Jason if you call he's a fucking great guy And he's gonna hate me for saying that yowza fitness calm I've been using my treadmill every fucking night That's the key is that now when I go home at late late at night and I didn't go to the gym

I can whale this thing out put it down within a minute It's on the ground and it's quiet as fuck it makes no noise and I can get my workout in even if it's a 12 at night yowza fitness calm it's helping me get back to my fucking sick skinny Bobby yo losing weight I'm gonna be skinny again Come wait man sexy body I'm sick because I'm you were like we go this like the old head shot I don't have a shot that's like that was pushing I would tell you to master it. I'm going back to skinny Bob and I'm fucking Kelly as soon as Should be plump back up. Yeah, I like fat Kelly I got fat Kelly was I like the big dude some of the listeners on Facebook have found fat Kelly photos and they're gone crazy

Oh, dude, I have I Mean go and come in to go and look at it. Oh, please. Oh dude. I have You found that I'm going to be commenting going look at it. Oh mates and chases fucking You guys make sure you go to go runner.com for the bandilayer. I have a bandilayer Kelly has a bandilayer I have a bandilayer for fucking you, but you don't want to wear it I don't know. Only where bundle years. I told you when the apocalypse happens and it's full of shotgun shells Here's a deal. I love my bandilayer. Kelly. Do you like your bandilayer apocalypse happens and it's full of shotgun shells. I love my bandit, Leckel. Do you like your bandit?

Yeah, it's great. I use it when you go running. You go running, you do the gym, when you're working out, you can use it walking around the city and it's great when you travel. What has it been? I love the bandit, Leckel. It's a gorunner.com, R-U-N-N-U-R. It's unfuckable.

It's like it goes around you, but you put your put your cell phone in it your IDs your all your wallet stuff Headphones in the back it has a sunglass case for your sunglasses. So you can walk around the city It's awesome. It's like a man purse, but it's actually cool. It's cool. It's a bag pack But it's like it's not heavy and it's fucking it goes. It's a cool dude purse It's a cool dude purse. Go run a dot com. Make sure you go there and tell them that Kelly sent you from the fucking you know What did podcast on riot cast dot com any other sponsor? We have to thanks Thanks, yeah blue microphone and we want to thank a laugh button live And we want to we want to thank laugh spin dot com. There was a supporter

You know what do make sure you go and check them out and also check out the two new shows We have on riot cast dot com. I'm fucking excited. You'll be excited too because one of those female The Bailey J show is on riot cast calm So make sure you go check them out and weird medicine with Dr. Steve two of my favorite podcasts that I listen to You guys might not know about him. might know about him about own a fan do to save the best I want him on the show so bad I can doctor Steven my favorite questions about my asshole

Oh we gotta get dark get him in we've all got questions about her asshole but whatever I don't want you to we don't want us to watch it haunts us like the covenant like the heart of the government you're looking to kill's ass only turned to wax. I just moped.

But anyways, go to riotcast.com. We have two brand new shows. Make sure you support these shows. Go to iTunes, subscribe to them, and review them. That's how you stay in the top 10. If you guys don't know that, if you look at the top 10 on iTunes, the only reason is, it's a 24 hour period, subscribe and review. Make sure you do that for our show, all the other shows on RayaCast, but make sure you support Weird Medicine and the

Bailey J show to my favorite podcast. I'm not just saying that either. I'm so excited that they're on RayaCast.com because if you look at RayaCast now, it's not the same pot. You go to other networks, It's the same or shit over and over the same Couple dudes talking about bug on blah blah blah shit This our network now has the nerds. We have the fucking two chicks. We have rich and his wife We have Dr. Steve and now we have a she-mail the avn 2012 she-mail of the year so you're gonna mention mine. I was getting you piece of shit I was getting to it. You listen of shit. I was getting to it.

You listen to every other podcast, but hammer fisting. Hammer. Well, hammer. Hammer fisting. Hammer fisting. We know where the name came from now. Hammer. Too we name it hammer fisting. Jason. What's his name? No, I'm gonna tell you. What's the kids name everybody? Chris. Who jerks off? Who got the show? Justin. That's for Justin. Justin. I'm gonna have a podcast. I want to name it what we do. Hammer fisting. What's the kids name everybody's friend who jerks off who got the show just best friend Justin Justin I'm gonna have a podcast. I want to name it what we do Anyway, I was laying on my back and you were on when I was on my I started wiggling my butt Kelly's in my impression I think it's hilarious like her like a female with an a shane accent trying to do my impression I just looked at Kelly's doing my impression. I don't think it's hilarious. Her like a female with an Australian accent

trying to do my impression. I just looked at Kelly's boobs. I built them all fucking broadcasts. I never ever looked at them and I just saw them in a weird way. In a weird way, why? What, a side-beam? Did you such an insecure person?

Your boobs are weird. I love the time. Way weird tits. This is the greatest thing in my life. Kelly's got weird tits. Hey circus tits. What are you talking about? I'm trying to recall a third tits. This is the greatest guy weird. Hey circus tits Like her to recall a third to come in She just took one out right now was weird

Underneath and like a face on it and like hey Bobby And Joe just pew Looks like one of those carnival pennies. It's all smashed. It's all long And then we all become gay and that's what turned him the gay I Can the day because I was big to the dead I was an A back then big today I'm gonna say this I like fat Kelly Kelly. I think you beautiful Okay, I think you're beautiful girl and we're gonna get to this too because we're gonna hook you up with a guy But I do I like it is dick

It's called get I like that Kelly was sexy to me. She was a little fuller Shoes more tanable The kind of woman that touched him and told him he would like. She's obtainable now. I said attainable. Yeah, she's attainable. Well, she's hard to tell.

He's hard now. Not in the winter, I'm hard. No, she's attainable for us. Like, when she's fatter, she's easier to get. Now, she's hard. My problem is I don't have any game. Like, I went out last night. You don't need game, you have a vagina.

I don't know. I was like, I went out last night and I I just there was a situation where I was like oh I fucked that up like I'm such an idiot with boys. I don't know what I'm doing What you do? Because we started talking to a boy and I was like and it was you know I was like I'm back in my back and forth and then he's like hey can I get you a drink and I was like nah Like it's I don't drink. I'll take some food Because I'm doing it Me too

I want to make you gay I'm doing a big Mechimaka nice bloke I think it took it is like me like rejecting him and I wasn't And he was like oh, okay, and I was like oh no, I'm not do it all the time. What am I gonna do? Hold on a second. What are you gonna do? Hold on a second. Hold on a second. What are you gonna do?

Hold on a second. What are you gonna do? Hold on a second. Hold on a second. What are you gonna do? Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second.

Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. This is what we're doing listen this is what we're doing put together a contest with the Where we're gonna me and Dan are gonna vet men off of the internet if you want to do it You email me at ykwd at riot cast dot com couple guys Facebook me and I told them yeah, don't Facebook us don't tweet us

Email us if with your bio. We need a photo We should admit a photo of you and try not to take it with your kid Are your wife? You need a photo of a kid of it, a photo of you, and try not to take it with your kid. Yeah, please. Are you a wife? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Everything's taking a picture.

I caught shots permitted. No. No, you're not. No, you're not. Only cock shots. We'll filter all those, the Lewis J Gomez. It's like Christmas. There's so much dick in my inbox.

Are you on the phone in my fucking show? I'm emailing to get the date with the I swear to God I'm impressed of emailing you like fucking moira on your own show your emailing I was waiting for you to say because I thought that was gonna be funny. Oh, I was emailing you. Oh, you get a date with Kelly That's so funny. You fucking show cuz so funny I fucking love fucking eight Daddy really got it fucking love fucking Nate listen I really get hang on fucking slut we get to that Yeah, she's getting all fucking she just sort of rubbing her ass on the fucking corner of the couch Yeah, I'm like, I'm like, I'm listening and she's in here

She's in here She's just a word Don't bang on the floor this thing, did you know what fuck you're looking at? The fuck you fucking drummer from Metallica? One, two, one, two, three, four Don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don't don, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't,

don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't do it, no more Facebook, no Twitter, email ykwd at riotcast.com. We need a photo, we need a bio, what you do for work, where you're from. How you make your fucking living? Yeah, what? If I'm gonna say you out on a date with Kelly, I gotta fuck the whole thing. How your age, your age.

Yeah, and not made up. Yeah, we want you, first of all, legitimate coxize. I think that we should know what size your dick is. Yeah, I guess the nation. That's not for you, that's for us. We want to know what you can do. Yeah, because I want to see if there's like if I set it up, like if my guy's like a thick cut,

yeah, send him out on a date with Kellyn, she comes back, she's like, I should be straight in it, meet you, jeez. Yeah, I don't know. We want to know what size you pack and cut or uncut. We want size. God, she's fun. Yeah, we want to know.

Any former STDs? Do you like cut or uncut? Her STDs. What do you prefer? It doesn't matter. Oh my God, but she's a shesus. It doesn't matter. Alright, so you don't mind shuffle on that back.

Well, it's easy to blow a guy if he's got skin, but then it feels cleaner when he doesn't have the skin. Because the guys with skin and all the sensitive, it's a lot easier to do a job. You're a fucking professional. She really does look at it, like you brought it in, you're like, hey, what's the support beams right here?

She's like, this guy was obviously probably using non-union. He's looked to be about four inch stud screws. I'd say shot a job. I could come back in here, take care of this three weeks. Hello, it's what are you for? Ha ha! What was Justin?

Come on, Justin, that's a beautiful day. It's obviously kind of a huge, beautiful piece on that guy. Oh, shit. So, we need all these details. We need them. And we want to know what you like, what you don't like. You know? Juzen don'ts. Yeah, juzen don'ts. Also, what about what you would, what you don't like, or you know, Jews and don'ts.

Yeah, Jews and don'ts. Also, what about what you would do with Kelly on the date? Yeah. You'll describe the date. That's a good one. Describe what you're gonna take or what you're gonna do. What are your three best personality traits? What are your three worst personality traits?

We need to know all this. And you're paying for the date. We were gonna pay for the date, but Kelly brought up a good thing. He should pay for it to see how where he's gonna take her. What type of duty is, if we pay for it, any fucking slack. But here's the thing. He's going to get a blowjob at the end of it. What are you going to do with it? Jesus. Look at even gay Joe's like, it's right.

He's like, no, he's like, he's like, he's got his camera. He's like, you can fucking check. Gay Gomez, Neil Dantman Hey goofy Puerto Rican quiche, she doesn't know his killy Nate, have you ever done anything gay? No, no, are you kidding me? Have you ever- This conversation is a good thing Fucking mega church Nate, no way

Mega church Are you religious? Yeah, I'm yeah Do you go to church every Sunday? No, no, I've been church in a while So how church. Are you religious? Yeah, I'm, yeah. Do you go to church every Sunday? No, no, no, I've been church in a while. So how the fuck are you religious? I believe, man, I know where I think you are going to just let it be like that.

Ha, ha, ha. Who is out of all of us right now? Out of all of us, including Gageo. Who is going to help first? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Nate's off? Hey, it's a big game. No one said that his stock on his sniper gun was the Confederate flag. This one's for Dixie.

So it goes Joe. Joe is going to help her hey Joe We're gonna be a lot of you down there you'd be happy I don't fly All right who's who's second who's second she's a woman Second she's a foreigner who's third. Then we go on fatness Gay Puerto Rican which is you might you'll probably be running it Bump Joe

Joe's not hiding it. Yeah, that is not lying. I'm a liar, I'm Puerto Rican and I'm gay. He's doing three. Joe's just doing one. Just living on a sloth. That's true. And I'm kind of fat, let's get real.

So, yeah. Yeah, you're all seven, Joe. So you're going. So, and then Dan's last. Yeah. And you're going to heaven. I mean, yeah. It's really.

So you don't do any, you don't even manage to bait, do you? yeah, so you don't do any You don't match debate do you yeah? No, I don't you don't I'll be now. Why is just you know? It's a different game You know, no, I don't believe that no, I Mean I'm like I'm just I grew up a Christian like in a Masterpiece boy things like gays and I was joking about like I don't you know,, and I was joking about like, I don't, you know, I know you're joking. Do you? Because I don't do you. Turn it on me like this.

Oh, sorry. Is this when the fucking sniper rifle, the 50 cows on you, you get a little fucked up. Really? That sniper's like to sit and really? We've been found. So now we're like, we've been found out. You've been compromised.

Yeah. I'm sponsored by Compromise. So you jerk off? We've been found so now You've been compromised I've been compromised So you jerk off yeah, okay, but not you don't like it It makes me furious You go devil you go devil get out of me Devil you gonna get you go get devil and smash your hand on the wall after Pintenancy whip some self like it But then she go So you you know you but you you're cool with it. I mean you're yeah, no, I yeah, I'm a

You're married right? Yeah, I grew up Yeah, I grew up in the South and a Christian home like and I just raised Christian like I'm not saying I'm not a great Christian at all my No Christian great. No, that's the best part about being a Christian. You get to go look. I'm not perfect There was only one person? My Kelly, you, I think we should hook these two up. Let's say you're losing. Are you guys gonna pay for the date? I'll pay for it. If you go on a date with Joe, I will fucking pay for it. Dude, I would almost go on a date with Joe just to get the free meal.

I don't think that's where I'm at in my room. Where are you? Where are you? I'm at the beach. Where are you? I mean, come back to what guy's about to say, doesn't it? This is what you have to do. You have to, Joe, would you go on a date with him?

Oh, for sure. All right, so you guys go on a date, all right? I want you guys legitimately. I will pay for the date. I want you to go out for dinner, right? You meet, but I want you to dress up, too. I want you to look good. As much as I dress up.

No rollerblade. No. No, Joe, we'll see if Joe wants it. Yeah. Does he like the rollerblade? Joe's like, don't cock, talk me, go on. I don't. Would you go the wrong the bloody Joe's like don't cock talk me Would you go on a date with Joe I talked to my girlfriend about it. She would I would do it because it's funny I laid in a bed naked with a dude. I would obviously go on a day

I'm not sexy because it's hilarious, but we're not telling you to watch him jerk off But I think it'd be funny. I would do that as long as my girlfriend was okay with it. All right, so find out if you girlfriend's okay with it. And if it's okay, Joe, would you? By the way, you know, I'm comfortable. I like won't make eye contact with Joe or this conversation. I got my attention.

I'm sweating. I think whoever wants Lewis to go on a date with Joe. I'll tell you this, if we get over 15 requests for him to go on a date with you, you get 40,000 listeners, it's gonna be more than 50. What if we do a double double date? They're lazy listeners.

What if you do a double date? 85 on the charts, okay? A double date? A double date. Kelly and the listener. Yeah, and the listener. And the way Joe can watch out for Kelly and- He's separating me.

Yes. And then Kelly can watch out for Joe, because I'm a rapist. Yeah, that way Kelly doesn't end up a torso with no nipples in the fucking long island sound. And then the Australian authorities like we have a gal over there. It's on a pretty decent podcast 85 and a hundred. They didn't really leave reviews. We didn't cheat out. We go whoa. I don't know where those three fandom episodes went. We got a Z-melodress. That's what we know about him. His Facebook page is shut down.

All right, listen, we're gonna wrap this up. So that's what we're gonna do. YKWD, if you want Kelly, that's it. If you want, or you either, YKWD at riotcast.com, don't Facebook it, don't Twitter it. Unless you email it. You can do that as long as you email. We would need a bio.

As much info about you, a photo, how big your dick is and all kinds of stuff. Good idea. A date idea, where you gonna take her? Joe, aka, yay Joe. Yay, aka. Hey Joe. Hey, K, um, he-o. We-o.

Um, prop, aka. And fucking, K Gomez. Lewis, K Gomez. They're gonna go on a date together with Kelly to Shaperone wink wink yeah And and Nick thank you so much That's what I've been called Nick quite a bit. That's great. I called you Nick because I was thinking of dick And I look at you Nate. I was thinking of two fucking his awful dick and Joe's awesome docking I look at you Nate, I was thinking of two fucking his awful dick and Joe's awesome dude, what's your most docking thing? Touch them and pull your skin over mine. Let's see Saul. I don't know.

That's the thing. It's like the thing that you get your thumbs that you fingers stuck in. I'm like, uh, Chinese finger trip. The Chinese finger trip. I'm passing the Olympic tour. I'm gonna grab her dick. You grab mine and then you thrust. I don't know if you thrust.

You thrust. See Saul. See. I'm gonna grab your dick you grab on and then you thrust It's like he's one airplane trying to refuel another airplane I hope Joe fuck you Dude he fucked me for the joke of idea. I was laying there grabbing my ankles I was just rocking my nuts gates on what was it? My comedy central presents All right, we're gonna get the fuck out of Nate Bergazzi the sniper you are the shit. Thank you On you're awesome Lewis Gomez Fucking the gay Shit, thank you for coming on. Thank you. Awesome Lewis Gomez

Joe thanks for coming down He's been taking photos the whole time I end video so make sure you look for those on our Facebook page And the Twitter stuff what's the names of it? Okay? Okay, WD podcast at Twitter. And there's one on Facebook, we'll pop them up and make some little films and stuff that we're gonna see me squirming in my seat. Cause it's like a whole lot.

You did, but you know what, Kelly, you want your sweet little ho- You're a little ho- You're our little ho- I'm your ho. Yeah, we're our ho- Really? Yeah.

You can just do your Lewis. I can put a re-hearing stuff. We're gonna get stopped trying to make up for it now. Yeah, we're getting too late in the game. Yeah, you came on a cookie Um, we're gonna chocolate actually. We're gonna. Wow. We're gonna get you a man Yeah, oh, we're gonna try to get you raped either one I'm kidding. I hope that's not I hope We put that in the thing. You were right. I promise I won't wait.

I don't want any fucking scumbag going on. Don't you fucking hurt Kelly. That's what I do with my words. Honest to God, I want to legitimate guys only. Don't fuck around. We're not taking stupid, legitimate guys that want a dead a chick that used to be fat. And also not a guy that's going to be afraid of me

talking about it afterwards. Oh, a guy who's gonna be afraid of me talking about it afterwards. Oh, a guy who's afraid of a girl talking the whole time. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no Oh Ask Nate how fucking I was on the road of them was recording a city on Don't even try Guys are so fucking vague I have to ask Because Little yellow little girl you know that she claims You know what fucking who what when where and why that's five things. That's all you gotta do Hey, hey, hey, we're gonna phone with you

We had a lovely conversation about doing the podcast this week. I said yeah, I'll see Nate's I'm right with Nate They're gonna be in the show you're like yeah, let's have Nate on great. Then she goes. She talked to Bobby about the podcast Sure did that's me I blame me because I keep switching. Jumping for the bullet for. I'm going to take the bullet for this. I'm going to take the bullet for it because things keep fluctuating. We have Colin coming in tomorrow. We have a bunch of things kept switching up and going back. So I kept having to tell her to change things. So she's just doing what I tell her to do. So it's her.

But she is worthy and she does talk too much interrupt you and her text message is I don't even read them I just call her back because they're fucking not shockingly long I try to literally get them as short as possible right so I agree with you so anyways but I take some of the hit on the switching we all I love Kelly to do you love Kelly, too. Do you love Kelly? Kelly, we love you. I love you guys too. All right. We're gonna get you some dick. Anyways, and of course, thank you so much. Fucking Dan, aka monster boys soda. You're the shit. Kelly, me. I love Kelly. Yeah. Kelly. It's got really nice and sweet. We're gonna go around the horn here. Give your stuff. Your plugs right around the horn.

My plug. So follow me on Twitter at KELYFASTUCA. And I've got my show underbelly at the Creek in the Cave. Second of June, 10 o'clock. Come on out. Joe, do you want to talk about anything? Yeah, I'll be having sex with the guests of your friends at Cali. Yeah.

So come watch. Come watch. Yeah. I want Gage, you're back on because I want to learn more about gay stuff. I really do. How interesting was it that I finally got to ask that question, was it more sexy when you weren't out of the closet?

I always wondered that. Well, there you go. Because I find it more sexy. If I come out, it's just going to be regular old game. Now it's fucking secret. Hi honey, I love you. You'll talk you later. Don't. At Dan Soder on Twitter. You could see me at comics at Foxwoods May 31st through June 2nd.

Hatcho. Hatcho. Big four shows. Hatcho hunting. Yeah. That's going to be great. Yeah. Yeah. It's going to be good. Are you ready to watch a 25 minute headlining? You know what not cool, bro. I'm joking. It's I'm looking at the high end of 39 You guys are gonna watch 25 minutes of good stand-up here 25 minutes of mediocre stand-up. You're in here everything I've ever written it's called Phil Ergo fuckers. You want to see some crowd work next to him? Running at it's running out of steam at 32 minutes. Oh, no, we love you, Dan

Thank you great. You got night If you want to go see a middle-air do better than a headline You ready see a middle stretch all weekend See me go, um, what else? You guys want to hear the question. What do you guys want to talk about? If you guys want to hear the question, what do you guys want to talk about? Have you ever seen a 30 minute host set? You will. If you guys want to see the late show on Saturday, canceled 10, 10, oh, early.

You guys want to hear some voices? Let's do this. If you want to hear a two-shot now, we're just taking... No, we're just taking shots. I mean, you really want me to start handing them back. You got to go... Now, what voice is he going to use? Well, I think we know that...

Fake kill each that face. Ha, ha, ha. Who's making it? It could get some pretty thick. What voice is he gonna use? Well, I think we know it. Fake kill each that face. It could get some pretty features. It does. It's really vicious. I mean, I really could just do it. Do it. Do it.

Do it. Do it. Do it. You know what you do it. Listen. Listen. I'm honest to God. I'll say this out front right now go and see dance

So it's gonna be awesome. He's the best at comics. Where is it boxwood Fox Woods casino? You're headlining your first First weekend headlining. I've had lined before but only one night. Look no joke. I usually feature. Oh That's like that's what you said. I've had line before like yeah, it's your first headline gig, dude It's gonna be awesome. You're gonna have a great time for like, yeah, it's your first headline gig, dude. It's gonna be awesome. You're gonna have a great time. Make sure, I don't know what the way I was doing. The stopper.

Make sure that you go and check him out. If you live in Connecticut, Rhode Island, Boston, New York, go down for the weekend, get a whole tellroom for the night, go down and support Dan Soda. But not as much as you need to support me when I'm there a couple months later. There you go. I'll be opening for you.

If there's a choice. If you want to see me on my strong suit to come back a couple months later, I'm opening for you. That's pretty easy both. Two trips, a couple months. Are you opening for me? No, that'd be awesome. I'd probably, that'd be really funny if I met the club and I'm like, so can I feature in

a couple of them? What? You can make that happen, right? No, he doesn't need to be there. No, he'll go from headlining to me. Yeah, yeah, you know. This is really fucking big, bro. It's big.

I'm really happy for you. You're a funny guy. You know I'm your biggest support, dude. Yeah, I've done everything. I've done everything. Biggest breaking, all career. But listen, no. I'm fucking for you.

So this is a big night. I know we joke about it, but I hate when people, you know, bus balls and get people not to go. Go see Dan Soda had life for the first time because one, it's gonna be hilarious to he might fail. I'm not a Saint-Dembaugh. Shut up. Let's just Twitter. Shut up. Just Twitter at Nate Bargettse.

All right, that's all you have. D-R-G-A-T-Z-E. Keep it up. I'm in the city. I'm in the city. Yeah, what else till June 13th? I'm in coming on state in August. I got it. I mean, I'm about to take a you know my wife's pregnant. So I'm having a baby. I'm having a baby's June. You're promoting that. No, I'm saying that. I don't have any like I don't have anything for like a till the end of July. Okay. I'm taking some stuff. All right. Well, you have a website, NateBergatsy.com. All right.

Go there, man. Check them out. One of the funny dude, I'm believe every time you're on, I love when you're on. Lewis J Gomez. Bam. At Lewis J Gomez, it's L U I S J Gomez on Twitter. And also go to my podcast, the Hammer Facing Podcast.

If you're a mixed martial arts fan, we talk shit. We have fighters on every week with two podcasts a week. So it's a good getting better all the time.. I mean legitimately had Jake shields on I'm I got to talk to read because He's gonna get you a special guest. I know that you're really you're really stepping it up the the new guy you just added I fucking love Joey and Vance funny funny. Yeah, Chris think I was the other comment on it. It's fucking great If you like MMA, it's on riot cast and it's one of the fastest growing shows on riot cast too. You guys started out with a nice little following and now you're growing consistently all the

time. So it's a fucking great show. And also, just if you guys around California, I'm doing my West Coast tour. I'll be in San Francisco, San Jose, San Diego and Los Angeles all throughout the end of May and the first half of June. So go to GomezCompany.com for dates. And you know me, Robert at Robert Kelly on Twitter and we have a what? You're literally the owner of everything just walked up and said wrap it up.

What's up, no, how you doing? So yeah, so Robert Kelly, you know, make sure you go riotcast.com, go to the iTunes, subscribe, leave a review. That's a keep us in the top 25 or the top 100. Like I said, riotcast this week, we introduced the two new shows, Bailey J and Dr. Steve. Dr. Steve's number 24 on the charts. We had seven shows in the top 200.

This week, which is fucking great. Seven out of 12 shows for 11 cast, 11 shows. Sorry, 11 shows, yeah, we are uneven. Shows were in the top 200. So that's great, along with the host of the comedy show, live, who's sitting here judging me right now. His show was, I think it was 30 something. He beat me fucking, of course. Yeah, your show is yeah, don't fucking say No, you're in the fucking No, you're just doesn't care your show is a hit you had fun have some self-esteem his show was a beat me this week

But so there you go. What are you doing Kelly? I'm gonna wrap up cuz Dan's gonna get out of here. Oh fuck yeah. All right. We're getting the fuck. Well, yes, we has actually 10 minutes. 10 minutes. Yeah. So why don't you stop whispering and using his hand signals? We do have to wrap up. Uh, what else? I'm fucking just going on and on. This is the worst ending of any podcast. You know why? It's dudes on dudes. Dude's on dudes. Dude's on dudes. Let's do two like dudes. Dude's on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on dudes on Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, with Bobby and Fridge. Okay, here we go. All right, tech talk for the day.

Is that somebody in the hallway? Are they dropped off the fridge? I got this new thing, man. I got this new thing. You wouldn't got it. I wouldn't got it. What do you think about it? I love it.

So far, but it looks fucking super cool. It looks like demolition man. It's, it's, you know what it is? Yeah, it's a band. It's the Nike Fit band. Is the fridge here? The fridge is here. Which is's a band. It's the Nike Fit band is the fridge here the fridge is here My tech talk the fridge is here Yeah, you can leave it right there dude

That's great. Um great. You pay the guy What's up, dude? We're doing a show right now. How you doing? You're on the air right now. What's your name? Tony? What's up, Tony? The Yankee fan This is this body right there red socks? I you know give it shit anymore. No back in the day when we used to hate each other. Now we're just like what's up dude? You're a champion. I'm a champion.

All right, buddy. Thanks a lot Tony. Don't spend that all in one place. Get it? Yeah, give it to me. We got a fridge. A fridge came in. You know what fuck tech talk on this thing? We're gonna do tech talk on the new fridge.

Refrigeration. Our first started in the 1910s. Bro, back home, we call them an ice box. Do you guys really call it an ice box? You're going, you should shit outside, Dan, and push it out. You fucking lost your intelligence with your hair, and fucking.

Oh, hey. Oh, she's cutting me. My name's Kelly, I have no middle ground In the immigrant or unreal super sweet. I just make fun of dance here That we probably gonna push me down the stairs My name's Kelly and there's no middle ground No middle ground Kelly. No middle ground. Either I'm giving hogs around telling you go fuck yourself. You fucking caught your wanker. You are a fucking Tech talk for today

We Bobby and friends We're gonna do we're gonna actually do this Kelly We open up my bag and grab me the the bag. I got it today. It's a Nike fuel What the fuck is it called? Let's see. Let's call the Yeah, Nike fuel band We had this What the fuck was that? Oh, I throw it. Is that what that means? What what am I a fucking seal trainer? You want the fish? I needed that to read your cunt

I got this today. Apparently you get an app with this off on your iPhone. You plug in how many fuel points you want to lose. Okay. And it keeps track with your arm movement and what it's like a, what is it called? The pedometer. How many steps you take and how many calories you burn all day long?

And when you hit your, whatever, whatever, you, 2500 or 3000 or 4000, the app goes off and says, you've reached your fucking goal today, you did good. So, and it looks like a cool ass wristband. It's a watch, too, though. Yeah, it's a watch. Push the button that tells you it's 401 and it has

these lights over here that actually tell you how much battery life it lasts around two days. You have to plug it into your computer and when you do that it downloads all the info to the website too which is actually cool. So at the end of the day it tells me that I've done my quota for the day like I like eight o'clock night. It's like you've done your quota. That's dangerous for me. That's like the red light to go. Let's get some KFC, get the dirty bird. Cause I'll eat junk food when someone tells me

I've done mine. Yeah, but here's the thing though, you get to keep track of why you're looking at it with evil eyes. No. Oh. You dance eyes either sexy or evil. I, well, what happened, Kelly?

You keep track, like my fuel points, I have 2500, I put it for light activity. That's just me walking around the city and moving. I've already got, today, I've got, hang on, I'll tell you, you can hit the sea steps, it tells you, I've already taken a thousand 50 steps. I've walked my little legs, my little fat legs have moved the thousand times and it tells you Fuel points I already have 491 just from moving around and you want what 25,000? 2500 I put in just system you can change that on the app too when you change it it changes it For that thing it looks fucking awesome and then calories too. I've burned 217 calories just by moving today, by walking and moving and doing this podcast,

you're burning calories. So it tells you how much calories you've learned, how many steps you've taken, the time it is, fuel, blah, blah, blah, blah. So it's actually pretty cool and it does. It looks futuristic. It looks fucking awesome. That's right, how much was it?

It was $5,000. So what happened on kids? It's pretty expensive. It's Nike. It's like Sony. That's right. How much was it? It was $5,000. So what happened on kids? It's pretty expensive. It's Nike. It's like Sony. Well, listen, I'm going to let you know in the next month how this helped me, but I'm going to wear it for the month and see what it is. But fuel band, I kind of like it because it does well being fat, the thing that you lose.

If you're more conscious, I'm trying to lose weight and it's on your wrist or you know, if you, it's always reminding yourself, like that's why Weight Watch is putting the points in. It's reminding you to look at man, watch what you're eating fatty. And this is just another way that you can actually focus in on losing weight and how much you've calories you've burned. And it's a cool way too. It's pretty, it just looks like a cool wristband. And then when you push the button,

it does all kinds of cool shit. So I like it so far. It's $150. It's pretty expensive. It's pretty expensive. I mean, look. Yeah, it doesn't count. Here's a deal.

This is, you know, what goes in my head, I can walk for free and it doesn't matter. I know that if I walk from here to my house, that's a thousand million points. So do I really need to how many steps I took? Do I really need to how much? I mean, no, but it helps. It keeps your mind focused on, okay, I did move today.

Especially with the Calor at Canada, that's the best thing because when you look at the back of a chip packet and you see like you know 800 and you've only burnt only just burnt 600 and you're about to shove 800 back in Yeah, that's true. I pull me right back. That's a good point. Yeah, I mean that would be cool and seemingly steps you took Is kind of cool. Yeah, and just the what it's just it's just me. It's a fucking sick watch Yeah, it's neat. Do you like it? I love it. I got one for everybody. No, I'm kidding.

Oh, God. Look at you. Oh, Dan. Oh, Dan. I'm sorry, Dan. Can I have that box back, though? That's my, that's my wife. Come on.

That's for my, Dan. Dan, Dan. Give it, give it, give it. Give it a box. Get the box. Dan. Sit. Sit down.

Give it a box. Give me the box. Give it a box. Get the box. 10. Sit. Sit down. Give me the box. Give me the box. Give me the box. Oh, oh. The only place you can get it. So check it out, Fuel Band. I'll let you know in a month or so, we'll talk about it on the show. Remind me, Kelly. We'll bring it up if it actually helps.

And you know what else I think? I think that if you're gonna use it for the next month and you're talking about it, I mean, Dan don't have one. Nike maybe wanna help the progress a little. Well, here's the deal. Probably not. Yeah, I think Nike is too busy with, Nike maybe want to help the progress or well here's the deal probably not yeah I think Nike is too busy with

Yeah, Tiger Woods mother are small independent company that I need two freaking comics from New York City just I wish Nike I think Nike is a little big but you know what maybe maybe we get some money in from the sponsors and the donations and maybe we get you guys one or I can just give you the cash. Help out Dan on his first fat. Cash. You want cash?

You want cash? I like cash. Alright, we're going to be doing tech talk on Max Payne. Next tech talk. Fuck yeah. And then we're going to be doing. Bring that shoe. Agriby.

Hey, what's up? Yeah, and then we're gonna be doing bring that Agam by it Hey, what's up? You guys Dan wake the fuck up. This is a very important part of the show, okay? I like the first ride the day Kelly for still got we wouldn't be able to do the show. We have a new studio We have all this great shit and it's due to our fan donations. We take that money, we put it right back into the show. So another thing that we got, we got Mike Flaggs, we got a refrigerator for the studio, we got a bunch of other crazy shit.

So we wanna thank you guys, you guys are amazing for donating. If you, some of you guys donate five bucks, some of you guys donate 250 bucks, all of it helps. We wanna, we wanna thank, and I'm gonna fuck all these names up, just know that. five bucks. Some of you guys donate 250 bucks. All of it helps. We want to think and I'm going to fuck all these names up. Just know that. Clarence Riddo. Clarence. We're going to call Dayton person. That's a fight. That's Clayton. Oh shit. Is that Clayton? Yeah, Clayton.

Clayton. Kelly, come over here. Dayton person sounds made up. I suck. I can't read. I need glasses. It looks really easy. Why did you get very juicier now? Kelly here. Use my mic. Okay. Okay. Where am I reading from?

Clarence Rdue, Clayton Pearson, Ian Rice, Anthony Valentino, Clayton Pearson again. This dude is a fucking... Yeah, that's awesome. Justin Freshman, Neil... Did he donate twice? Yeah. Yes, he did. Watching her petrified face. Oh no. Don't edit twice Kelly. You're getting way too close. Okay, as a freshman, a freshman, and Neil, she wants to own this park. She's just waiting for me to make a move and then just a

file of fucking complain. And then I'll be gone. Take over the whole show. We know what you're up to. I can have my own mic. Oh, fuck, fucking watch your fucking. You just do, man, what were we talking about? Okay, sorry. Neil Handel, Kair. And then I think this is a company in Vato Proprietory Limited. In Vato Proprietory Limited, is that?

Well, it's a payment. That's a payment, yeah, yeah. We had a pay for shit with that So yeah, fuck them they took money out and fuck Kurt Iverson to that cocksucker That's my web guy who took shit out to make stuff for the page. So we're good. Okay, that's it That's it. You guys thank you so much for donating that was that was my in May We got maybe we got a lot of donations. So we thank you guys for donating helping us out Help them making the show better with the mics and the fridge and all this stuff.

You guys are awesome. Alright that's it. I'm stuck in the water, I'm stuck in the water You know what I'm dead? My mind is pumping, I'm pumping, I'm pumping You know what I'm dead? Really, really, really, really You know what I'm dead? Don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face. Don't stop.