Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Everybody Loves Colin | Colin Quinn

Episode Date: March 29, 2021

This week the great Colin Quinn returns as we get into Bobby and him traveling overseas, how he met Rich Vos and why does everyone keep asking for more Tough Crowd! SUBSCRIBE TO YKWD https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly https://thelaughbutton.podlink.to/YKWD​ http://www.ykwdpodcast.com FOLLOW YKWD http://www.twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://www.instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast http://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast FOLLOW ROBERT KELLY http://www.twitter.com/robertkelly http://www.instagram.com/robertkellylive http://www.facebook.com/robertkellylive New episodes arrive every Sunday via The Laugh Button For advertising opportunities email: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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This is the original original. I Bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad bad What's happening everybody? Robert K. You know what? What's up? What's all the lady bugs happening at Lou? Yes, your favorite person on the fucking earth is the guest tonight Gabby yes, blow kisses with the queen of England fingers you have Not you Sorry, buddy, I apologize. It just, it bugs me, let me take these off because I look like, Gabby, that teacup way too big. Big, right? That's how it should be. Nice go up a tee.

Yeah, you and Gabby have so many things in common. It's crazy. Your fingers are the same size. Your calf muscles are the same. Sure. Your T habits are the same. Oh. You're just Gabby if she transitioned into a middle-aged man.

I mean, I'm gonna look just like Colin in 20 years. 20 years. Yes, especially when you can't afford the whisker shavings. Did it did it did this is a real ass podcast. Oh, that's Lewis Gomez. Sorry. Hey, mush mush is here tonight. Of course, we got my favorite person to in the world. Everybody fucking everybody loves him. Colin Quinn is the gas.

Scabbies here. Even though a lot of you guys don't like it. I do. So fucking stick it right in your butt. Okay. That's weird. My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, What? What? I don't think you guys know. Yeah, this is fine. I'll just turn this off a little. I'll super up here. That's as high as it goes. Alright, how's your good look? Yeah, you look.

Hey, you look like a hostage. It looks so, it really, it really looked like in, you know, Novam, I mean in like April. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you have very April, an April podcast look. That's right. Yeah. You don't have a microphone either, right?

I thought you had a nice microphone. Right here. It's not on. It's not on. Oh, can you hear it now? Nope. You have to choose it. Oh my God. I mean wait a minute. You have to choose it. Go where see where it says Mike. Mike. Click on that and click on audio and then click on Mike and then click on your mic default got it there we go yet

you picked the Yeti oh now he's gone can we hear you no no turn the mic on the mic turn the mic on turn the Yeti on you turned it off now turn them on the actual mic. Yeah, how about that nice? That's not way better Nice Nice nice I mean, we're mainly an audio podcast. We do we do some good numbers on the YouTube's But this one's gonna go ballistic because everybody loves Colin Quinn. Everybody loves a little Colin

Everybody loves me. They made a show everybody loves Raymond. Everybody doesn't love Raymond. Everybody loves Colin Quinn. Everybody loves a little Colin. Everybody loves me. Everybody loves Raymond. Everybody doesn't love Raymond. Everybody loves Colin. I'm best friend. I'm a new Raymond when he was doing comedy. Everybody didn't love Raymond. I'm a new Raymond.

I'm a new Raymond. At least if Donald, I'll give Raymond, you gotta give Raymond a mon a reminder props for one thing. He was following guys, he was going on last at the seller shows. I've told you this, he's going on after Louis, Nick, uh, a tell last on the show, working clean late night, talking about his wife and kids when nobody in the crowd, they just heard these killer acts getting, you know, hardcore.

He's like, my wife, my kid, and at first, you could see people like, wow, this is all the time. By the end of the set, people were going crazy. That's how funny he was. Wow, no shit. Yep. And working clean, dude, that's the way to make money. Working clean, that's why I only work clean

What That's how that's why I do all I do a lot of corporates and You know all ages shows because I I choose not to use profanity in my act Dude are you are you are you having a fucking aneurysm right? You know I Water is so loud Is that ice water's color green? Oh, sorry. Sorry. So sorry But you get mushy as the lazy guy thought it was your bones

Wish weighing in. Yeah. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Good, there you go. I did, that's crazy. You know, it's funny because, you know, if you were clean, you have a better opportunity to, you know, Greg Fitzsimmons said that to me, right when I started comedy, I was in a comedy class at Maria Fowl's O'Neal's house.

I live there. So she made me take her class. Um, such a... And I remember I got Al Dobany in Dane. I was like, you guys got to do this with me. This is going to be hell, please. And they did it with me for one week and then they just never showed up again or paid. And I actually quit three weeks in.

I just stopped going. I just didn't come home. I just stayed out all day. Yeah. And you had to sleep in the house because he wasn't going to his class. So she had Greg Fitzsimmons, who was a big name at the time.

He did a lot of evening at the improvs. Right. But he would do jokes like, yeah, my legit alcohol, you know, when I drink, I wake up in spots, Chelsea, Charlestown, Rivia. I heard that in the meetings. It's like a meetings joke.

Okay. But he said to me, uh, by the way, we have one second. That was the worst impression of anybody I've ever heard. Greg Fitzsimmons. Not Greg Fitzsimmons. Yeah. He is the high high voice and Bob goes by the way. I was like, well, okay. I said Greg Fitzgerald. I meant. Oh, not Greg Fitzsimmons Greg Fitzsimmons. Oh, yeah. All right. Well, you got to go that right. You little happy, but you know, I mean, what I, all right. I, I know the difference. But very good, Gerald got a big back then, Fitsy, who I like to call Fitsy, Fits Simmons. He was not, this guy was evening at the improv of a block tonight show, but that shit

was the biggest thing. Right. And he said, you gotta be clean. You gotta be clean. You gotta get seven minutes of clean material. And I was like, why? You got to be clean. That's the only way to make money. You're going to make money. You're going to be a, and I was like, yeah, but what if my life is fucking banging and, uh, and, and fucking eaten and banging, just banging broads. And he was like, well, you're never going to go anywhere. I was like, well, fuck off. And then I saw Joe Rogan on TV on MTV doing a blowjob joke and I was like, I'm fine.

I'm fine. Yeah. Yeah. I always, you know, that story about me in the tonight show, right? How I was like 1989, I'm in LA and I got Jim McCalling with the book of the tonight show comes up. And he goes, Johnny would love you. I was watching you pass through nights. Just I go, great. I go on the show. He goes, just cut out the cursing. And, you know, we'll work on a set.

I go, I'm now. I'll do it the way I do it. You know, he goes, he can't curse on a tonight show. I go, then I'm not interested. He goes, what is this laughing? He goes, I mean, what are you doing? I go, I'm not interested if I goes, what is this laughing? He goes, I mean, what are you doing? I go, I'm not interested if I can't do it the way I want to do it. You have so many stories like that. I do. Yeah. What the fuck with? What is that?

It's called a diluted sense of your own position in show business. If you had it, since you were an open-micro. Yeah. Yeah. I did. No, that would say since I was an open-micro, but I would say when I first started getting laughs, it just went to my head. Why? Why? Have you ever tried to like, now look at some people are going to listen that go, yeah, fucking good for Colin stuck to his gun, fuck the tonight show, right?

But we're not talking tonight show right now, where you know, there's guys who've done seven of them and not even a fucking blip, they didn't even get more followers on Instagram, okay? We're talking Johnny Carson. Right. We're talking, your life has changed possibly. Well, probably definitely.

Well, I think it was a little after that, but you know, you're right because Drew Carey did it after that and he got his own show because that went tonight show. So yeah, your life could be changed by it. And I liked Johnny. I wasn't like I was like, I hate Johnny Carson. I liked Johnny Carson. But I like I was like, I hate Johnny cars. I like Johnny cars.

But I just, you know, I was, I grew up thinking like George called, like, because I grew up on George call in the Richard prior, my whole thing was like, fuck that. Everything else working clean is bullshit. And these guys, you know, I mean, they, they went on to the thing, but they didn't really believe in that kind of stuff. So in my mind, I was like, yeah, that's what we believe. Well, you know, fuck that kind of shit. You know what I mean? So I was coming from that school, even though it was 100 years before that,

but it sticks in your mind, your role models, you know? Yeah, well, even prior when he was on the tonight show, it wasn't that good. Well, and he had a shitty attitude. Him and Carl them on together, and you could tell they weren't even comfortable with each other right there. It was really tense.

Yeah, it was like, it's like watered down. You could tell that they were like, you know, the problem is, is once you tell a comic, don't say this word, and it's, don't say this word, don't say don't say this word don't say that punch and Change that to something else. You fuck up the whole flow Like inner monologue you've created with yourself to to know how to when the joke the laugh is coming When it's the timing you're fucking up

when it's the timing you're fucking up. Exactly, yeah. And I mean, those shows, like not that's an actual particular, all of those shows, they do that literally, they go, we're short for time. And for some reason, the comedian, not the boring actor, they couldn't cut their story short for time. But the comedian was all about timing, working on this set. You know, a lot of people really work their set too much, in my opinion, by the way.

They work it too hard, like that five minutes, you know, it's a little too tight. If you'll notice some, we'll be up there and it's like, hi, it's like they're appearing in court. They got to suit on, but at first, having a lot of years. Hi, everybody. It's like, all right. Come on. Loosen up. You. It's like, all right, come on. Loosen up. You're great because you're not that, you know? But they come up to minute before you got to cut 30 seconds.

You're like, what? Where? You got to cut that line. What? We just spoke to you. You know, they said the censors said, you can't say this, you have to say this. You're like, no, no, no.

That ruins everything. It's all the words. Those little words were to say this like no, no, no, that ruins everything. It's all the words those little words were to get the wall sometime, you know, so it's right. It's a weird thing You know, you know, so funny is that 90 some 95% of the Actors they had on TV faded away did shit and I would say the reverse was for comics. Right. They would actually wind up being the box office smashes or the television smashes and all these actors that they wasted 15 minutes, 20 minutes delving into their horse shit will fly by night bullshit. And we never see him again. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's, it's definitely a, it's, it, there's a lack of respect for standards, but that's how we like it too. You know what I mean?

I mean, I like the fact that these people are like, you know, that we're like not really in. You know what I mean? We don't belong. I want to be in. We don't belong. But I want to be in. I want in.

I want in. I want in. I want in for a couple of years. I want in for like three years. I wanna get a new house. I wanna get a lake house and maybe a beach house. I want in for three houses and Max's college and then I'll come back out. That's big in.

Well, I don't want big houses on the beach. A beach. South Carolina, you get one for 450. Yeah. You know, or like the sad thing is you couldn't have hours at 10 years ago. You couldn't have asked very park. Look what I'm talking to. That's true.

You couldn't have asked very park 10 years ago, right? It was so. It's so expensive. Yeah, but it was it was it was dirt bags. All the parolees lived like in those single room. They were all like roomy houses in Asbury park like 1015 years ago. Now it's been 1015. It's probably 25, but I think it's 10 or 15.

Well, I speak of Gabby's dad, Gabby's Bon Jovi had this special on last night on TV about the new album. And guess whose dad wasn't in it. What's going on? Yeah, some of the talents. No, but remind me what this was. It was the 2020 album that he he shot it in a film that Nashville. Yes.

And your dad was know what that some of the bald thin guy on the organ, which is the keyboard. The opposite of my dad that he was working on the musical when they filmed that Oh, they're doing a musical. Yeah, no, no, he's not he's not I just joined the musical. Yeah, don't send calling down a path where he's gonna start spreading the thing that bondjouvies doing a musical called shot through the heart I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm I'm and uh... Is this a memory for us? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha So, Colin, I feel bad for all these guys now because I've been watching a lot of old Carson, I've been watching a lot of like Gone Riggles and Foster Brooks and the roasts are now available. You know, 15 years ago you had a stamp until three in the morning until that commercial

came on. Get all the Dean Martin roast right now for now 95 a month. You know, typing your fucking credit card in hope that it just the shit came, but now everything's on YouTube and I've been watching them and Carson was, I mean, you know, they say it, but Carson knew how to let somebody be funny and he was funny too. He knew when to throw. He shit it. He could take a hit. He would take a good hit. to throw his shitted. He could take a hit. He would take a good hit. Yes. I agree. He would take the hit and he would throw back. He wasn't competitive. You know what I mean? He knew he was the guy and he let it be like that. He didn't try to push it. Yeah. And when he, but when he did push it, it was hilarious.

Yeah. Like the time when Don Rickles hosted the show, broke Johnny's cigarette holder. The next night, he came back and he saw our cigarette fucking thing broken. And and and stupid, Rickles was filming next door and he walked next door to the studio while they were taping, walked in and what's this? And then Rickles goes, ladies and gentlemen, Johnny Cray goes, they know who I am.

Right. Right. Yeah. Like, I need you, stupid. Yep. That was the fucking best. That reminds me those days with all those guys, reminds me most of us. Yeah, tough crowd. Top crowd reminds me of tough crowd. Open Anthony. Open Anthony. Bing.

Keep going. Keep going. A lot of fun like that, you know. Keep going. There's one more you missed. Um, no, that's it. Oh, no, that's it. Um, oh, uh, YWKD. Oh, you didn't even know the name of my podcast. You know what, dude?

YWDKD. Well, I'm not a stupid radio show in Cincinnati. Why KWD you fucking ass? What about the, yeah, I remember even at the cell of Bob, we'd go back and forth when you were on stage or I was on stage, like we had a vibe going there for a minute, you know? Yeah, we, oh, if you walked in, I say, oh, yeah, it was the best. You, you could say something to somebody on stage and not ruin their set. That's right. And not fuck them up. It would, it would be, it would just, it was almost, um, welcome. Yeah. If I saw you walk through I know you'd say something back and Yeah, it was almost a it was like yeah, this is great. Let's do we we liked it because it was spicing up our set

Yes Yeah, that was my favorite walking through when boss was on yeah, you know Keith if Keith's on he's, he'll just be like, look at this. I remember he's called me fat. And then he offered me a thousand dollars cash if I could button my out of shirt. Oh.

And I couldn't, I couldn't. Oh, you tried. Of course I tried. I needed to, I fucking take, I couldn't, you tried. What was I tried? I needed a fucking take buddy. Yeah, thousand bucks. I took a thousand, I took a thousand bucks from Kevin Hart once. Why?

Yeah, yeah. Cause I was it, I was doing OP Anthony and he walked in and he goes, he goes, God damn it, Bobby, what the fuck happened to you? Holy shit. And he, he gave, he took a thousand bucks and goes, Hey, man, you need some money and I took it and left. I never do that.

I never do that. I took it. I remember when his fucking, his, his, his, his, his goons, you know, his security was looking at me and I just walked right, I went right home and I gave it to Don. I go, here's a thousand bucks. He goes, what'd you get this for? I go, uh, Kevin Hart basically called me fat and, uh, disheveled and he gave me a thousand dollars like I was homeless.

That's great. A thousand, a thousand. A thousand was homeless. That's great. A thousand, sir. A thousand. Yes, people are talking to him. I remember the old time boss was on stage at the seller. And this girl walks by, cute girl, and he goes, Hey, miss, she goes, I know, can you buy me a house and keeps walking to the bathroom?

Because that was a big pickup line. Can I buy your house? She did a perfect time she was, I know, can you buy me a house and walk to the bathroom? Lou brings up a good point. Will Tough Crowd ever come back? That's a great point, Lou. Thanks for bringing it back. Um, well, it's, uh, I would probably say no, the odds are really bad for it happening. Well, they have a good in the last couple of years. If anyone tried to get me to do it, Bobby did. He gave it full effort, but I just, I don't know. I'm just not, I don't know why.

It just irritates me thinking about it. You know? Why? I don't know. I don't know. But he really does. I don't, nobody gets, I mean, can I be honest with you? I don't, nobody gets, I mean, can I be honest with you? I don't understand.

If you bring up tough crowd or doing it in any way, what you, you hang up on me. Right. Well, you're up boarded up many times. You boarded up like 10 times, they're 20 times. Yeah, because it's, everybody wants it. It's like, don't you feel like tough crowd? And I'm being honest, don't you feel like tough crowd is needed right now?

Yeah, doing extent I do. I mean, the past couple of, I'd say the past couple of years, I've started to feel like, yeah, that place I should exist, of course, you know. And don't you feel like the way you did it, because look, some shows or some comics take it too far. They go, they go way overboard to prove a point, say whatever you want. It's like, I did, you know, I get it, fine. But, you know, there is, I think Tough Crowd walked that line. It was always funny, right? I think tough crowd walked that line. It was always I think you gotta watch stuff crowd again

I don't think you I don't think you realize But it was always it was always funny, but I wouldn't say it always worked that line I wouldn't say to always work that line. I mean, well, I have something to tell you. Put it this way. Now, the episode I give you as an example, I won't give you as an example. That is not the way. OK.

Well, maybe, well, maybe OK, well, butter king has a question. Now, maybe we do this. When is this going to happen? Mochelle bring it up Is remote control ever gonna come back That's all right, but don't hang up I know I'm calling it's a move swing. I know when he gets a move swing

And I know he probably didn't have a snack or some type of sugar tree today You're wrong about that No, here's a policy of the remote control thing it bugs me was I don't mind What bothers me is when people go hey, I remember remote control is like all right Don't he's a bother be since remote control. It's like, all right, don't. Here's a bother because since you're a remote control, it's been off. People are going, I remember you from remote control, like it was some off-roadway play that only 11 people saw. Yes, it was on three times a day on MTV during the height of MTV. We all know what it was. But I remember when the remote control came come back his Kenny died Ken over was very underrated as a

as a a guy that day he was so quick people got used like he had to do all that information on the show The questions and all of he had to do all that stuff and still be funny. So people like no he has to this straight He was so funny in the middle of doing, I couldn't do all that information every day. He was just, you know, he was really an amazing guy. I mean, you know him from Tough Crowd, right? Yeah, no, he was one of the EPs, right? He was a great guy.

Yeah, he was the EPs and he asked me questions at the end of every episode. He'd be off camera and we do a review of the episode. And he was funny at that, you know? A lot of people don't know that you wrote every monologue yourself. I did it. Yeah, every monologue.

Well, because me and Verzy were having a debate last week on Calter and Kelly if, because, you know, people got called out for having writers. You're doing the debate, remember? Right. Yeah, yeah, you called them, right? And you, and you feel the same way as Verzy, because you wrote all your shit, even on tough crowd, when didn't they try to get you help on the monologues? No, they try to get me help. I needed help, but I still want to write to myself. Many of those monologues were very spotty.

I wanna be honest about this too. You were so good to me back then. You were so, I mean, almost too good. You know, you were so nice to me back then. And we weren't as close as we are now, of course, but we were friends. Yeah. But you tried to get me to be a writer on the show.

Yes. And you had me sent a packet in. And you did a good job, you know. You did a very good job. You had Keith. What's that? Oh, you had Keith. You had Norton. You had Pat very good job. You had Keith. What's that? Oh, you had Keith. You had Norton.

You had Patrice as writers. What is my was like about Bob. Bob actually took it seriously and did the work. These other motherfuckers, Keith Robinson, Patrice O'Neal, Jim Norton, these guys, we had like a test thing when the show first started you was still in LA, they're like these test weeks. These guys show up, I walk in, they look at me, they like, you think they'd be like, oh well let's pretend to write, just look at me like this. I look on the computer porn, early days of porn. And I'm like, just no respect whatsoever.

Just handing me in like, she's just like literally, it was a, and I just tried to explain to them the psychology I go, you guys are literally treating me like I'm your manager, like I'm some figurehead. I'm a comedian like you. I'm a fucking asshole too. Do you think I'm some figurehead I'm a comedian like you I'm a fucking asshole too do you think I'm gonna stand for this on the fucking show get the fuck I go you guys think I'm like the foot like there was such reading me like the boss it's like a psychological state you go into like oh he's the dick that we don't fucking as you get the fuck at it it was unbelievable just because I did them a favor and try to get them right is they were like and like any comedians

I understand this part if they have a good joke they're gonna talk it for their own It didn't work out to put it mildly you fired them. Yeah Was lost that were a. I fired them all. No, his force was not a writer, but I always loved was, despite the fact that he treated me, rather badly, I always liked was, you know, I was like, this guy's funny. But I mean, he treated you badly.

Why did you want to do it? Why do you talk to him? I had like, I told you, the firm, he doesn't remember any of it. The first time I saw him He's with this guy Frankie Bastille and they just swagger into this Jersey one nighter like two kings And I was like Frankie Bastille was a king Boss was not a king he was the sidekick

He was Frankie Bastille sidekick. He was probably his driver now. He's Bonnie sidekick They walked in and they both both just, you know, walking around, you know, attitude, but Franky Bastille had the attitude. Franky Bastille went on after me that night. I bombed. It was a one nighter in Jersey. Franky Bastille, who had a black heart tattooed over his chest over his heart. And he's a Vietnam bed. And he goes on stage. He goes, this is like a rowdy

crowd, you know, Jersey one later. And he goes, you fucking people, you didn't laugh at that fucking guy. You know, funny. He, I fought in Vietnam for assholes like you to sit here and not understand his fucking jokes. I feel like I'm the asshole now. He was crazy. And then next time I see voice, I did this comedy like I was trying to do like a high co of this one. Wasn't my whole act. It was like a poem. But it was jokes set up backwards. I go on stage to Carolins. I do the jokes. Doesn't do the well. But it was a you know it was a fucking Tuesday night. I'm trying something out I get off stage next day and though the next act or the MC gets up

I Don't do palms folks. I do fucking jokes. Oh I got a fucking ass hole rich voice and I was liking cuz just something about him I knew ten guys I came growing up. So I always felt at home. You know, he's like, you know, but, um, yeah. So when I did Tough Cry, I was like, oh, I love having a boss on it because he was funny as hell, you know what I mean?

He was funny. He was so mean though. So fucking mean. Yeah, so he was mean. Well, so were you. So was I. Everybody's mean. I mean, the meanest on the show was Patrice though

Absolutely meaner than Nick meaner than Nick meaner than Nick the power to saying something Nick would be doing his jokes and maybe once in a while if somebody got in his I line he'd be fucking he was like Nick was more like a dog where he wouldn't attack, but if you got too close to the leash, he'd bite you and then fucking let you go away. But Patrice would try to cut you off. He'd be like, looking around. And you would just see people trying to do their fucking thing on the show like this. And they're like, why is this giant black man staring at me? He's feeling, and he just be like, you know, he was. He was like royalty. Yeah.

Yeah. Just looking down, just his mind. And then he'd just be like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, to the people in the cellar. The table of nice soccer moms, having a few laughs, suddenly shh. Shhh.

Shhh. The whole restaurant would shut down. That's why Confederacy of Drensons, which you refuse to read, which mush loves, you ain't gonna confess your Drensons, Gabby. I bought it, I haven't finished it yet. But it's Petrie. It's Petrie.

If you're gonna go sleep. If you're in one night, where you're gonna sleep, open up that book, oh fuck, I when you're gonna go sleep. If you ever, if you're at one night where you're gonna sleep, open up that book, go fuck and put your right out. It's Patrice. Okay, but I've talked to a bunch of people who will remain nameless, who you've told about that book and they've all come back,

because yeah, you know what? I fucking tried, I got two pages, I had to shut it. Yeah, can everybody that I've talked to except for much It's it's key you can't get through it. Who besides Calta? I'm not telling you but the other people No, no, no, there's other people that will like yeah that book stinks no it loves it No, it you don't count. He's from another planet What loves it? No one, you don't count.

He's from another planet. Right? He's got nobody else in his life. Of course he's reading shit. You read it like 12 years ago, he loved it. I like that book, Robert. I know you like that book because Colin likes that book and you love Colin.

Right now, if Colin said stop listening to the show, you would. Colin's over. Thank you very much, you would. Colin's talking. Thank you very much, great. It's a horrible book boring as shit. Thank you, Greg. Bobby, it's a fucking book. I fucking hate that book.

It's boring as shit. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. As the closest you get to Patrice, if anybody really understands Patrice, they should read that book. Well, can you explain the book? Just give me what the fuck it's about, because I couldn't get through the first fucking chapter.

It's a fat, overeducated, mama's boy who doesn't want to leave his house and his mother forces them because they run out of money, she forced them to go out and get jobs. But even when he's working, he's just better than everybody else. He looks down on them, but they all want to kill him. And he just causes havoc wherever he goes. And when does this take place? New Orleans like 1960s, early 60s. Yeah. I'm going to I have it in the house. I keep it in a draw and I keep extra cash in it to hide from the car. The center is carved out and there's a gun. That's it. That book was I literally keep cash that I had. I cried for my wife in that book. I swear to God. It's in that draw for, I mean, okay, seven, six, almost 13 years, 14 years I had that. How much cash is in there?

I'm not telling you that. If you guess, I'll give it to you. It's the 1000 bucks that Kevin Hart gave gave you I say it's 400 400 bucks 1400 no not 14 I got Gabby three grand Nope What higher or lower? I'm not telling that cuz you get a bunch of people I don't know, they're gonna rob my fucking house. I know exactly what it is.

You'll take the money, they'll take the money and leave that stupid book behind too. Confetti has the evidences. Ugh, fucking doy. Motion to trade right. What's up? Motion's great, right? I love it. It's a great book.

Yeah, because it's his story too, that if you're describing it. It's Mooshy Yomal's point. Yes. You're living in your mother's house. Yeah, but I'm not with her. She's in her own house somewhere. Yeah, but she made you leave. Where are you now?

Yeah. No, I'm in San Antonio. San Antonio. I got to read that book. Yeah, I'm in San Antonio San Antonio. Oh, um, I got you gotta read that book and now I'll change the subject. It's ridiculous. I have the book. It's on my nightstand. I read the first chapter and then I was like, exactly.

You're book stinks. So first chapter is bad calling. Yeah, the first chapter is the roughest one So tell us that you told me that 15 years ago skip the chapter two Maybe I could have made it I just gave you the perfect way to enjoy the book. It's Patrizonil That doesn't use did same motherfucka. You agree with that? I would say that, yeah, the first chapter is really long and it is a lot of expensive, like not expensive, but it's all like character development for later.

Yeah, you need it. You know how hard it is to open that book and be like, Colin Quinn wants me to read this book and bubble blah. And then I'm like, I'm supposed to learn something from this. That's the worst part, Gabby. Is that when he told me, no look, of course I love calling, I look up, but we're friends now. You know what I mean?

It's a little, I relish it, but back when he told me to read that book, that was like fucking, you know, a cult leader telling me to do something. It's like, whatever you want. I remember I went and got it. I got my wife was like, what do you, I don't read. She goes, what are you doing?

I go calling, I said, I got to read this book. And I remember sitting down and the bed, and I had my little lamp on and I'm sitting there and I'm trying to get through it. And my eyes kept doing this. I'm reading. Oh, nice to row. And I finally went, you know what? I'm gonna have to fucking never bring this book up again, because I'm not going to tell him this book stinks until until we I knew we're going to be friends now with it

stinks. All right, I will try I will take my money and put it in the other book. I don't read Jim Norton's book. That's in my thing. And I'll try to read it. No, the second. The first book I told you I was reading it. I just got in Lasix surgery. But of course, you know, Norton is like, Hey, man, I need you to write a forward for this. Could you do it? I go, okay, when you do it next two days, why are you tied? Just at Lasix. I started reading that book

happy endings. I could not. It's still one of the funniest books ever written. Yeah, I was laughing crying because you know it's all true stories. Yeah, so funny. Yeah, he knew he'd read that book. Not in the first book. I love that you yelling into the microphone like she's gonna talk back. You know, did you hear me?

I know the talk louder. She's not in the room. Yeah, so that doesn't make a difference. She's like the fifth beetle. I remember when you got people don't I don't know if they know the story, but I remember when you got, when you got Lasik surgery, we were doing a road gig and I had picked you up at your house because I had a car and I would open for you once in a while and I picked you up and you had these fucking, expensive for higher sunglasses on that you bought at a

bodega or somewhere on the way there because you looked like a fucking asshole and I remember we were driving out and I was like what's up with the stupid glasses. Because you know if you travel with Colin, He needs somebody to be there because he's disheveled like a shoelace is untied this He's got notes. He's got a jacket. Everything is kind of he's kind of you know clamor any you know He's just you know is like Al Pacino and that you know an early film just holding a bunch of shit trying to get somewhere He gets in the car He's all the show. He's got these dumb glad. What the fuck you doing? He goes what I got a license sir I got to have glasses we're driving on the highway. I took them off his face and threw them into the highway

Why did you do that? Because Gabby, the fact that he didn't care, he's literally a star at this time. He is a star. He's living in a penthouse apartment on a high rise in a dormant building in Midtown Manhattan. He's on TV, he's making a ton of cash, he's got money, and he fucking bought a four- a parish, fucking weird sunglasses. And I'm like, what the fuck? And I, they were, they were $4, too. And I remember I made

you throw your sneakers away once, too. Yeah. No, just so that it was cheap. That was going cheap, but just I had so many. I wasn't even using them, they were from the show. I just took them. I'm fucking sure, Coteroid Brown sneakers, remember those? Yeah. The show, the show was trying to get stylish. A lot of bad things like that, you know. You came out of your apartment,

Coteroid Brown sneakers, I made them take them off and I threw them on the wire, on the fucking phone wire. Yeah. I always wanted to know what happened to this. What's that? I always wanted to know what happened to that jacket. Um, you know, I mean, I worried after that special. I don't know.

I had it for a while, but I don't know where it is now. You look like the guy from the fighter with Mark Walmer, Christian Bale. Yeah. Yeah, it was, yeah, I was, I was remembering the, when we went to Iraq the other day, I was really going through it. I saw somebody with the friendship coins, remember those?

Remember the, do you still have yours? So. So. So. You want to take another swig ice? I mean, you have any ribbon candy you want to eat during this podcast. When you go over in Iraq and you go to a base, they give you a coin

from that from that base, correct? Yeah. And we we were doing two to three bases a day. Yeah. And we were doing two to three bases a day. Yeah. And we collected all these coins. Remember how sick I was? Yes. I got, I got.

I got. I got. I got. I got. I got. I got. Well, one of these was bad. Yes.

You were really. You remember now that people are going to believe this, but you're going to you're going to back me up right now. Do you remember when we saw the werewolf? Yes, it was a half-liger, half-wear was. It was half-we saw werewolf in Iraq. Saddam Hussein was like creating hybrid tiger lion combinations. It was it looked like a it had a man it had a man chest. Remember? Yes. This animal were in this van inside of Saddam's palace and they were transporting us and it was this little like

you know, I don't know kind of what a travel van or in it all of a sudden it stops and this animal walked in front of the fucking van and it was it was it was it would look half human and then like a man chest Yeah, and like a wolf bought back and like some weird lion head, it was fucking nuts. And we, I remember we were like this, what was that to the marine? And he was like, I have no fucking idea. Yep. Crazy.

And they said beforehand, there might be these things, but we didn't think we were going to see that. It was really weird. Well, that's when we got off the, when we got off the Baghdad, the guy walks up, hey, be careful of the lions. Yes. Because they had a zoo here.

They let all the animals out when they ran away, and we still haven't caught the lions. Yeah. Yeah. Oh my god. I was like him. Yeah. That was crazy. That was crazy. I got so sick, you know, I Yeah, that was crazy.

That was crazy. I got so sick, you know, I could have died from that. Did you know that? No. I talked to somebody after and they were like, oh, you had the crud, that's what they call it the crud. Where all the sand and all the shit goes up into the assignancies and gives you an infection

And it went into my fucking head in my ears and I remember I blew my nose in a towel And it was all brown when I was done with it and that's when those Those secret service guys remember those guys we were staying with in that little bunk They get the one of them was like, he had take this. I go, what is it? He goes, don't worry about it. And don't tell anybody I gave it to you.

Just take it. And I took it. Next day gone, everything done. What do you think it was? It had to be some type of penicillin crazy fucking kill everything in your body. They only get to like the president when he has to go, you know, give like a speech when there's a whatever.

Yeah. That was like a serious thing. Serious thing. I don't know when the plane was Steve burn, mean Steve burner sitting there and they said if it something shoots up, that means we're going to be attacked. This light goes off. That means they're shooting at us in the plane.

So the light went off and the guy, and I look at Steve and I go, at least I made it. We'll never know if you would have made it. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.

How about me? How about me when I looked at the guy, I was like, the lights shot off, they shot the flares out of the back of the plane. And I was like, oh my God, take a picture of me with the sunset. He goes, that's a rocket. Just got shot of us.

So I can't do that. Yes. Oh my God, that was the fun. That was one of the funnest trips ever. Greatest. We went twice, right? Yeah. Who'd we go with the first time?

Me and Steve Bergs. Right, and then we went to Japan with Nick. We're Jimmy and Nick. The fucking nightmare. Why? It was fun. It was fun. Japan, we went to, you could not have picked it worse

that we went to every place in Japan except the cities. We went to everybody in Japan by train. And we want to all except the cities. We didn't get to Tokyo or the other places. It was crazy. No, we went, yeah, we went to all the bases and we were, we had a fly, but in Japan, the planes go like this, they just take off straight up because the mountains. And then they don't, this weird thing in Japan, they just go by the rules no matter what. Like, I remember like when I was in the bathroom, I was taking a dump on the plane and, and the thing went, being, please go back to your seats or whatever. And I was still shitting and just, sir, sir, you gotta get back to your seat

and they would not stop knocking. They just kept knocking until I got out of the bathroom. Yeah. Yeah, that was fucking great. That was a great trip. They have a shit in Colgian, oh, they have big on advanced toilets. Now they do, back then they didn't.

Right. Now they do. That's when you accosted a swan. Yeah. You yelled at a few. Remember the time we went to the restaurant and the guy goes looking at us and then I just turn and smack you in the face and the guy goes, I go, my friend he would like to say something whack and he goes, I give you proof.

And then probably maybe yeah and that swan still gets me in trouble. Don't even bring it up. All right, relax. Remember we fought we actually fought. Yeah, and that's one thing. Yeah, we've we had a physical fight. So what was it? It was like a MMA fight. It was a MMA fight. Yeah, because people don't know about Colin.

Colin likes to throw down. Okay. He's from Brooklyn. He likes to throw down and we were in Japan and they had fight. He just wants to fight. So we're literally having a real fight in this pit and it's not even joking. Like he gets me down, then I got him down, then I think you choked me and then and he's laughing. Yeah. What? You got the better of me. Well, that's because you had it. I tied your shirt around your neck and I wrapped your arms up. That's a trick I learned in Boston when you fight a little hockey trick. If someone has a shirt you're wrapping around their neck and tie their arms up. Yeah, like this. That's a real trick.

Yeah, yeah. And then how about the, I remember when you punched me on the side of the head. When, oh, driving to Penn State, right? Yeah, doing 70 down the highway, drinking a hot coffee, and you punched me in the side of the temple. What'd you say? Nothing, we were just playing games.

We just thought that was funny, it was like three studios, you know? You know, she's attacking each other. I know. Ah, dude, fucking hey, I know, but that was the same trip to give it an idea of how much we wanted to eat. We stopped at a supermarket together. To the trip. to the trip. It's not a four-hour drive. A super long trip.

We inboxes of crackers and treats. Somebody wants to know what came first, the cop show story of Bobby's outfit. Well, that's, oh, the story. Well, I was planning. I told Bob the first time I did capture I have this character. You got to come on the show And he he was doing sex and drugs so he couldn't make it the first year. Yeah, it's character I playing that from the beginning sister

Yeah, and most people on the other side she's a real character. She's a real person. Well, that was a human trafficker named sister pink More of a you know a global Globetrotter, you know drugs margillar and you know I've watched that so many times you're up I can't get enough of I can't get enough of the lip gloss that Bobby is wearing. Yeah, yeah, his lips look very luscious then dead. I like, I like, I like what he's given that hate to look to the acting teacher. No, that wasn't acting.

A lot of that, this is what people don't realize. When I was yelling at Keith, it was not acting. People like, you're such a great actor. I was so mad at Keith, because he couldn't fucking remember his dumb lines. Only the ball didn't miss the ping. No, no, no, no could see him laughing because I'm fucking screaming at him for real. It's sister-ping, you fucking idiot. That's no, people still bring up that episode to me all the time. That episode really resonated with people.

It was one of the best things, one of the funnest and best things ever been done. You know, I cop show I like cop show I would do again. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's it's crazy to me that even this year with all the stuff you couldn't film you couldn't do stuff. Why somebody wouldn't pick up cop show cop show as like an interstitial or you know, even it's so easy to make and so cheap to make. It wasn't that expensive. It was literally no, it was dirt cheap. It was literally what Quibi's supposed to do. And we offered them and they turned it down.

Unfuckin believable. Unbelievable. Well, we made. We offered them, did you stop putting it? You know what I mean? You're here ears. Mesta pain. Look at him. Look at, look at Keith. That's how I see Keith all the time in my head.

That face. I really, I believe that's, that, if you had a close your eyes and then someone said envision Keith Roberts and that would be the face right there. So true. Just fucking. You're you're gonna play it or you just look at it. What I'm going to say. You're just looking at a card on the screen. Oh, I'm legal to kill sister Peng. Can you say exotics, no leopards? Are there run of the middle snow leopards?

What are you trying to say, sister Peng? I'm trying to say, you dumb. Oh, come on! Quick call, this is not being a annoying. Let Kanye go! I'll throw the case out of court. I mean, you discussed me as an Asian and as a woman. And cut. Good. I think we're getting there.

Stop. That makes me, that, my favorite line right there. Just that fucking, as an Asian and a woman. The fact that you threw that in there, it's so brilliant. People are really good at it. I think we're getting there. Ha ha ha ha ha. I think we're getting there. Oh my god, I fucking hate this business.

I do too because that show, if I had my hood, if I had the, if I had the, I would believe it would have turned it to tough crowd. The show. Yes. It would have been a hybrid of a show and tough crowd. So oh, so that's interesting. You say that. So that maybe the evolution of tough crowd would have been that. Well, I would have tried to make it that. So that maybe the evolution of tough crowd would have been that. Well, I would have tried to make it that. Yeah. And I think that was on his way to be in that.

I mean, we had you, we had Keith. We had Norton playing a rat. But he had a, and it was so funny because he showed up and we're like, we have no rat. Do we never money for even for a rat cost of it? No, you know, but we couldn't put in a rat costume, but I want a sweater. And this guy comes up with this sweater and it looked just like a rat skin.

It's a little store in Brooklyn. It was like a rat sweater. I remember that episode. It was fucking great. Not as great in that. No, it was so annoyed. And once again, Oh, Keith, it was great in that. No, it was so annoyed. And once again, it was annoying. Oh, Keith just fucking annoys everybody.

Keith on set anywhere is a fucking... Keith, that the movies is annoying. I remember we went to... We would go to the movies that fucking Keith movie night that he used to put on. And he would be... You'd go and it'd be a Marvel movie, so it's us.

And then these nerds that have been waiting a lifetime to see fucking Captain America or Star Wars or whatever to it come to light. And it would be, he would just boo the fucking, the screen. He would boo. I remember when it was he Batman versus Superman. And he booed Batman. He He would boo. I remember when to see Batman versus Superman and he booed Batman. He was like boo. And they were like, what the fuck? He's the worst. He's the worst. He is the ultimate troll. He was trolling before the internet.

Yeah, he really is a bad fucker. Now, we do an extra 10 minutes on this show, if you don't mind hanging out. It's an extra 10. But I mean, and I don't want you to fucking get mad. Would you let somebody else do tough crowd? Would you produce it? No, I mean, they could do whatever they want. People are going to do a version of it. I mean, I don't care. You know, but I mean,

calling it tough crowd, they could, they could have used the title. I don't give a damn, you know what I mean? But it's like, what if, what if, what if Keith N Voss, and me did Tough Crowd? We call that, we call that, we call that Tough Audience. You say, Audience, so weird. What do you mean? Would you be mad at that? No, you guys could do that.

You seem like, I don't like it. You just turned into fucking breakfast at Tiffany's. No, you can do that. You seem like... I don't like how you just turned into fucking breakfast at Tiffany's. No, you can do that, whatever. You're welcome to do it. I don't care. I don't care. I mean, if you guys want to do it, it's fine with me. You don't care.

You wouldn't be mad if me, Norton Keith and Rich Voss and a bunch of some of the other people did tough crowd. No. I don't fucking believe you. Why? I don't believe you. Why? I don't believe it. I think you'd be like, what the fuck? Fuck them. Now, wait, can you think I'm gonna hold on to tough ground and be like, hey, what's this? You guys, I don't give a damn. You wouldn't want to be part of it at all. No. Wow. It was, it was, it wasn't it was at the time, you know what I mean? But, you know, I mean, it's, you know, yeah, I think people have a hard time letting go of it

because it was such a special show. And right now, if that show came on right now, I guess a version of it would be what? Politically incorrect? Well, I was on before Toughcraft. Right, so you stole it from Bill. Yes. Right. So, so you stole it from Bill. Yes. Okay. You could say Bill stole it from, you know, the McLaughlin group, oh, you know, there's always a bunch of shows like that, you know.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, we're going to go over some news topics with you in the extra 10 and see where you're at with these. Get your take take you? Get you a take on the news topics. Well, just before you go, what's your snack tonight? I already had my snack. It was a half of one of those bars that you got me going to. With a slice of Wegman's Vanilla Ice Cream, I'd like to do a commercial right now, an unpaid endorsement for Wegman's Vanilla ice cream. I'd like to do a commercial right now. An unpaid endorsement for Wegmans Vanilla. All these other Vanilla flavors. Every time I look up,

which I do look up, top 10 Vanilla ice creams. I see 10 different kinds and I never see Wegmans. Wegmans is the best. It's not too rich. Hagen Dahlas in those places they try and the the elite Vanilla is try too hard. So they're like, all right, we get it. You have vanilla and you're thick and rich. And then the other ones don't try hard enough. Wegmans is right in the middle. It's beautiful. Wow. Wagner's it is there are certain levels of vanilla ice cream. And I believe I don't know if it's an old thing,

I'm getting older, but vanilla ice cream is my favorite. You know what I got into that I found that I wish I never found? It's called, what is it called? It's a hard shell. It's liquid and you pour it on the ice cream and it hardens. Magic shell? Magic shell. So basically you have ice cream, you pour the syrup on it's liquid and then when it gets cold it turns into solid. I

love how you're just finding this. Yeah, I mean, it's got the cherry in the middle when you order it. Yeah, no Yeah, what? No, those are cherry cordless. No, that's that's a talk talk to foe Talk to foes the best Talk to foes my favorite ice cream at an Italian restaurant if they have talk to foe I know the places legit. Yeah. Cause it's half vanilla, half chocolate, cherry in the middle, chocolate outside. Boom. You can't fuck around with that. Yeah. That's it.

That cherry. There is nothing organic in that cherry. There's nothing. It's not a whole. It's not even a whole cherry sometimes. It's like a half a cherry. Right. Right.

Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. There's nothing. It's not a whole, it's not even a whole cherry sometimes. It's like a half a cherry.

Right? Yeah. I will time pick the top two full up and took a bite out of it like an apple, like a, like an ice cream chocolate vanilla apple. That's awesome. It's so good. I get mad when they cut it in half. Some of the restaurants will cut it in half. I'm like, don't cut it. I want the ball. I want the fucking ball because when you cut it, you're actually taking a few atoms out of it. You're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you're, you way to make your own chart two four now. Okay. Well, it's called magic show.

It's like it looks like a chocolate syrup, right? Comes in a bottle of chocolate. You have to shake it. And then you get your vanilla ice cream, right? Put it in your bowl. You pour the syrup on top and it hardens like a Tartufo. How long does it take? Fucking seconds.

By the time there you go. Yeah, I could do that at Jerry Queen. By the time you hit the couch, it's hard and milk chocolate. Wow. Oh, dude, so fucking good. I want ice cream now. I want ice cream now. Yeah, you know, I would, I was, I

Want that candy bar got you the milk. It's called milk. You have a milk. I Told Colin to get milk. I got it from a Ruba at the duty free every time we leave the duty free I get one of these. It's a chocolate bar with a biscuit inside Oh my god, it's it's amazing like I biscuit inside. Oh my God. It's amazing. Like I tried it, I thought I took a bite and first I felt the chocolate, I was like,

this is all right. Then when you get to the whole combination of the flavor, it blows your mind. It's so much, how many do you have left? It's hard to say. That's it. That's it right there. Oh, my fucking Lord. That is the best. It's real milk chocolate. I believe real sugar, not this corn syrup shit. They put in America. American chocolate stinks. That right there, my friend, with the biscuit in the middle, a little marshmallow. Yeah, holy I've had that actually.

It is the fucking best. Great. The best. Um, all right, uh, what do you got going on? Do you have any shows or anything? I have shows coming up bridge port at this dress factory. I'm going to do that's a fun place. I'm going to do the seller for a couple

of days. I put it with SD two days ago and what day? Friday and Saturday of whatever the first couple of Friday and Saturday days that it starts. Oh my god. Are you excited? Yeah, I mean, I'm going on so long. I don't know. I don't feel excited though, but'm gonna know it's a long. I don't feel excited though, but I feel like it's gonna be interesting to go on. It's gonna be weird, you know. And behind the glass, you know that right? Yeah, but that's upstairs.

It's downstairs, place a glass too. I hope not. He's got to take that Plexigas down. We don't need that. Yeah, you don't need Plexiglas. Come on. That's that's six feet thing is bullshit. They just made that up. That doesn't mean shit. It's like being in the emergency hardcore with George C Scott that 70s porn movie was doing it. Yeah. That's what the Plexiglass is like. Shot it off. Shot it off.

Yep. That one. Yep. That's terrible. Um, and so you're going to be at the seller and then the first week it's open, which I'm excited about. And then, uh, we should come, we should do lunch soon. I'm doing, yeah, now that it's free, let's do it. You got the, you got the, you got the, you got the, uh, you got the, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh first week it's open, which I'm excited about. And then we should do lunch soon. I'm doing, yeah, now that it's free, let's do it. You got the vaccine, you're good to go? I'm good to go, I'm getting the second one tomorrow.

Perfect, I hope you don't drop. I heard it's bad. It's bad. You got the next stick, right? I got a little sick, Greg Stone got really sick so did Mike Feeney. What happened? Mike Feeneini got the one shot though. Gabby you sick? No, I got the first one. The first one actually made me feel weird. And then I got the second one in like a week and a

half. You get Pfizer Moderna. Pfizer. Yeah, I got Pfizer too. Me too. I felt a little weird that night. Am I only hardly crazy? So remind, but I thought we were for like two days that I was fine. Yeah. All right, Gabby, we're going to go to the extra time with Colin Quinn. We're going to go over a bunch of news topics. Get his take on it. Have a little more fun for the patreon.com people. Patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. So if you're not a member, go right now, go to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. And you'll become one of the members, be a ladybug and you can watch these shows live right now. They're in the room. All the ladybugs are there commenting, asking questions and unedited and you get

the extra 10 only on patreon.com, slash Robert Kelly. You know what, dude, Gabby, what do you got? Follow me on Instagram and Twitter, at Gabby's Brian. I have a monthly newsletter that's just comedic essays. I release every month. I'm releasing the next one in a week. So sign up. I'd rather read Confederacy of Dances. I shot the fuck up. That's what it's called. Have you read the first one yet? Yeah. Lies.

Yeah. Lier. I in it. Are you in it? No. Am I in any of them? Maybe. Am I am I not?

You'll have to read. I'm not reading them all. Did you do something to your lips? Did you get the filler? No, they look good though right now. I gotta go. Moch, what do you got besides fucking COVID? Follow me. That might be Sweras. I'll be with Bobby and Grievous Act Carolina at the properties on this weekend. And next weekend, I'll be Addison Improv with Janus Popus. Oh, what also is plug mind.

We got this coming on as well. So you guys want to check these out. What is this? Oh, yeah, here we go. Everybody look, I'm wearing one right now. YKWD, new merch is up. It's beautiful t-shirts. We got the culture and Kelly t-shirt is up. You can get it in black and white, the new logo with the Ladybug.

You got the YKWD with the red and the black. And every shirt you buy comes with a sticker automatically. So don't you worry about those stickers. They come right to you if you buy a shirt. Yes, new merch is coming up. We got a bunch of stuff happening. So make sure you go there right now. Is comic wears?

Wearable. Wearable. Wearable. Wearable. I'm wearing this right now. It looks fucking. It's so comfortable. It's nice.

The other shardy sent me the wrong size. I put it on Don to me to take it off. I look ridiculous. But anyways, there you go. And go to my, this weekend, we are at where? We are in Greenville, South Carolina at the comedy zone. There you go and go to my this weekend we are at where? We are in Greenville, South Carolina at the comedy zone. There you go. And then I'm at hilarities the weekend after that. And then after that, I am all over in Chicago, Illinois,

I'm in Illinois, the eighth to ninth to tenth. And then I'm back here in PA at the Maun Chunk Opera House, Royal Grove, doing a show out that's a fucking long chunk. East New Brunswick Mall, Paper Mill, I'm all over the fucking place. I got a bunch of shows and you'll catch me at the Comedy Cellars opening up very soon, get your tickets to that. And we'll see you going to the extra 10 right now. Dude, we got names right now. We got it. We good.

Oh, we got it. How many? Uh, we've got 20. All right, bring them up. Let's read them quick because Colin's done. You can see it in his eyes. Oh, yeah. He's gonna go get that. Oh, look at this. Hey, Colin, on the $10 ones, we give him a little sum extra. Oh, we read the $10 ones and just, you give him anything, say whatever you want. Make the big $25 ones, ready? To-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to-to What's going on? What are you doing? I'm trying to make it bigger. Sorry.

No, it's fine. I got it. Terrible. I don't got it. Make it bigger. Terrible. Terrible. Mike Marino. Trey. Gabe. Robert Draper. Robert Grabis Attendant. The one that's mine. I'm sorry. Go ahead. Go. Bob Draper. $10 one that's mine. I'm sorry go ahead go Bob Draper. That's all he gets. What did you give me?

I give Robert the 10 dollar ones I usually give him like a boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo boo game. Jamie Lauren Gerber. We got Mikey killing me 10 crap crap. Crap. Chris Lee me in Europe calling. Oh, Maddie B in the morning. How you doing? Is that my boy? Bill, oh, this is 25 and a 10 and a 10, 25. What? Fabian? 25. 25. TJ Harrington, is that your real name? You're just trying to sound rich.

I'm a pro-J Harrington. Was your best friend, JG Wentworth? Oh. Ha ha ha. That's like who's your best friend JG Wentworth? Fabian Martin, what's up buddy? Giga call Fabian Martin. What are you what are you the President of Haiti Chuck Gondos Colin Chuck Gondos sounds like it sounds like an Albanian point of thought. You should have saved that one for this one. Go ahead, Raphael. Raphael, is that Kamu Osano or Kamu Osano? Kamu Osano. What do you, mushy Mike's best friend in junior high school?

All right, there we go. We got Dave Green, we got Gina, Derenzis, we got Jack L. Ryan Dassing, Jack L again. Now we got, this all calling Sabrina the hyena. Oh, you're still you're still mourning De Stefano and Janice breaking up the pocket. That's right. No, no mad games. No mad games. I know I just I think I just invested in your I'm trying to get games up job but it's out of my league you know one more. One more Cody Montenegh. Cody, what is that Cody Montenegh? Yeah. What do you like that? The high school quarterback

that didn't make it bank and now you're working in the OLD dealership. I was like, all the 45 dollar members, you're gonna be getting to send the couple stickers to you for joining and being part of this. We're rearranging the whole thing this week and figuring out some stuff for you guys. I want to thank you for being a member. I want you to thank you for being a part of the patreon.com, such Robert Kelly being

a ladybug. All you new members, thank you for joining. Thank you for being a part of this. Stick around next month. We got Andrew Schultz is gonna be on. If he makes it out of that fucking riot down in Miami. And we got, I believe Tim Dillon and another special guest in the month of April

is gonna be Smoking Hot. And of course Colin Quinn right now, you're gonna be watching. So I mean, he's the greatest, he's the best. And you guys are the best Gabby. Thank you for coming on and being part of this. Thank you. Gabby, we've got the producer, Mosh, Mike Schwarez.

Check us out this weekend in South Carolina at the where? Comedy is on the end. Greenville, South Carolina. Ba, ba, ba. And of course, check out Colin Quinn and everything he's done It's all over the internet. What you you have shows coming up in the seller He's gonna be a bridge point at uncle the stress factor. You sorry not uncle Hey, oh governor's right after that. Oh and governors is open back up huh?

Yep I'll be there. Wait after that. Oh, and governors is open back up, huh? Yep. Make sure you support him at those shows. Governors more go support. And governors. I mean bridge ports are shit. Oh, you're going to get robbed. But listen, you're going to, you're going to, you get killed. Don't go there.

Listen, go to governors of the seller. Listen, literally 20 minutes apart from each other. Just take the ferry. Um, anyways, go check him out. He's the best in the business. Best in the business. You guys are the best. I'm Robert Kelly.

We'll see you guys next week. Get your shirts. Get your shirts available now. You know what, dude? Retro, comicwearables.com. You know what, dude? We'll see you next week. Bye, guys. con volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras te esperan. ¡Friparás!

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