Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Greg Stone, Coleman Hughes "Place of Reason"

Episode Date: February 6, 2022

This week's YKWD, Bobby's joined by Coleman Hughes and Greg Stone! We get into why Joe Rogan has become a target, coming up in the music industry, and determining what's misinformation! colemanhughes....org www.gregfstone.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hoy es un día de eso de no saber cómo va a acabar el día. ¿Dónde nadie pregunta de dónde viene? ¿Sino por qué no te viene? Y una ronda es el tiempo que pasa entre no conocernos, y no creer olvidarnos. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos lia. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos encuentra. Maú, la vida es más vida cuando nos encontramos.
Starting point is 00:00:20 Encuentra los bares de Madrid, la edición especial de Madrid nos lia. Un número de mao, a Madrid. 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno, 3 por uno. Esta es la 3 por uno señal, que significa que ya puedes aprovechar tu del 3 por uno en medianas a domicidio solo pidiendo al line. ¿Sapará? 3 por uno, 3 por uno en medianas a domicidios solo pidiendo online. ¿Saparao? 3 por 1, 3 por 1, oh no, no, no, no. ¡Dominos!
Starting point is 00:00:49 Pizza. ¿Suéías con un futuro más allá de los estudios de grado? Gracias a las becas de post-grazo en el extranjero de la Fundación La Caixa. Puedes estudiar en las mejores universidades y centros de investigación del mundo. Tu talento te mueve. Solicitate a tu beca en fundación la caixa.org. The media podcast. The fact that YKW did podcasts. YKW did back again. Old school back in the day. We're all starting before them all.
Starting point is 00:01:29 YKW did his podcast is so fun and crazy. And there's no rules. Shut up, you are ruining this. We're the more damn-a-man. I'm sorry. It's a comedy podcast. This is an NPR. That's the podcast done.
Starting point is 00:01:43 Is there any better show? This is the NPR. That's the Tarkant Dunn. Is there any better show? This is the original original. Yeah. What's up? It's, you know what, dude? Hey, I'm your host, Robert Kelly. And welcome back to another episode. I'm very excited about it so funny.
Starting point is 00:02:01 Every time I tell, before we go, and I'm going to be talking to this camera over here, and every time I do it, the comics go, oh, what are you doing? Because they have no TV experience whatsoever. That's what it is. It's just non-television experience. I'm very excited about the show tonight.
Starting point is 00:02:18 I got two friends of mine on, and two, not a comic on tonight, which is great. But I think a comic and waiting, hopefully. Hopefully, I'm gonna get them on stage one of these days. I wanna thank all the Patreon people, first of all, thanks for joining the Patreon, especially you, Matt Terhune, joining right at the last fucking minute to see tonight's show,
Starting point is 00:02:42 because you were excited. Thanks for joining the Patreon, all the new members, all the people that left that did on the mic. Go fuck yourself. We'll see you again soon, hopefully. Hope you enjoyed the page while you were on there. And what else? I wanna thank YouTube.
Starting point is 00:02:59 Oh, subscribe, but right now, if you're watching on YouTube, subscribe, hit the like, hit the, and then review us on, what do we got to do? Everything, right? Review everything. Just do this stupid shit you don't want to do. I mean, come on, review it. Give it a five star. Give me a four star. I don't give a shit. And make sure you do that. Subscribe, like, comment, all that stuff. Tonight, who do we got? Nicole, Nikki, New Nikki? We have person foremost, his works have been featured in the New York Times Wall Street Journal and more. Any host conversations with Coleman, the podcast, Coleman Hughes.
Starting point is 00:03:33 Yes. I'm very excited. And I, it's crazy because I keep saying your name, like people are going to be like, really? Nobody knows you. Like he, like comics me I come here all the time. That's what's fucking me up is that you're here every Monday night You're here every Monday night you play you're always hanging out But you're all over
Starting point is 00:04:02 Podcasting you're one of the big podcasts. You're part of this scene, and I'm like, I get Coleman Hughes on tonight and they're like, oh, I'm like Coleman Hughes. And it blows my mind that people don't know who the fuck you are, like in this, in our community. Cause you're part of our community. You're part of the seller.
Starting point is 00:04:24 What am I doing wrong? I'm gonna figure that out tonight, man. We're gonna figure that out tonight. And hopefully, I'm hoping this show won't do anything from my career, but I'm hoping more people will find, be like, oh, I know who is now and have you on. I would love that. And who else do we have on?
Starting point is 00:04:41 You can find him at the comedy seller, probably later tonight, maybe in the middle of this show. We have a right stone. Fucking you are such a viable asshole. Pliable? Yeah, pliable. What does that even mean?
Starting point is 00:04:53 That means Liz said do some of you okay? No, I was supposed to be on the show. You're supposed to be on the show. Yes, I was supposed to be on the show, but I can't deny Liz. She's tough Italian. She's hard to deny. She's very, and she said, don't worry, I'm gonna text Bobby, he'll be fine with it.
Starting point is 00:05:07 She didn't text me. I know, so then I have to hand it. I mean, it's annoying, she is so... Can you read Michael? Let's talk about a bully, you call me bully. Yeah, Liz is a bully. Oh, she's 100% a bully. She's a bully.
Starting point is 00:05:17 And she likes free-feet tolerance. Huh? Liz likes me. Liz. I know what it is, yeah. But she treats me really, really well. I feel bad for other people because I see like, you know, it's odd.
Starting point is 00:05:26 I'm like, I don't know, maybe I'm like one second away from being on her bad side, but. Well, you aren't doing this. I'm going to have to piece. Bots. Yeah. She won't answer the wrong one. Maybe that's the secret.
Starting point is 00:05:36 You have to not be a comedian. She, I would actually say she loves me and I'm horrified of her wrath. Of course it would be all are. Yeah. People don't know about Liz. Liz is the general manager of the comedy seller, okay? And she runs the day-to-day stuff.
Starting point is 00:05:51 There's SDU books and it will, you know, past people, there's no more owns. I call them the owner of all. He owns everything. Even look like he doesn't even own, he looks like he doesn't even own a pair of shoes sometimes. I don't know. I'm sorry, a guy gave him a bag of leftovers coming out of Regio's one night.
Starting point is 00:06:11 This is for you. But she is, she's scary. Liz? Yeah, but she'll kill for you. That's what's next. She's like Wolverine. Like she's kind of like scary, but she'll, like she, I don't say no to her,
Starting point is 00:06:25 because she does so much. She does all the shit that I'm scared to do to people. Yeah. You know, she'll like fight people for me. And I'm like, thanks, Liz. She knows I'm like a shy and not shy, but you know, I'm like, I'm a pussy, I guess. Yeah, you're a pussy. I'm a pussy.
Starting point is 00:06:37 You're a pussy, but you're not. Here's the problem with you. You're not a pussy. You're that guy with, like, just stupid strength. Like, you're the guy that you push, and then you just fucking kill everybody. That's it. Like the guy in dodgeball that couldn't throw the ball,
Starting point is 00:06:51 and you had to piss him off, and then he could really go mental and do shit. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I mean, I won't fight for me. It's a half-ass guy for you. Someone says some shit about you. I'll break their nose. So let's talk about my mother-of-war today.
Starting point is 00:07:03 Joe, I'm gonna show that camera up your fucking ass Joe. Fuck the point that came, you will more fucking time. But like I've never no had to handle. You're the only one wearing headphones. I love headphones. So where? Yeah, I can hear myself better. You know, I like to hear my own voice. Okay. You don't use headphones? No, it makes me, you know how deaf people struggle to talk. Yes, where are you going with this? Well, like when I put on headphones, I kind of struggle to talk like I normally do.
Starting point is 00:07:31 I feel like I can't hear your voice. I don't have a feedback between what I'm saying and how it sounds. I talk too loud. Yeah. You know, I talk in all kinds of really abnormal ways, so I just can't do it. You know why?
Starting point is 00:07:44 I think it is because I probably could have said that without using an offensive reference to deaf people. Cause offensive. I don't know nowadays. Listen, he, listen, you don't know. Coleman is in a, you know what I'm saying? He's, we're in comedy.
Starting point is 00:07:57 Right. Where we can pretty much say anything. And then we're actually in another part of comedy. We're never gonna make it. So it doesn't matter what we're gonna say. You know what I mean? We're really protected. If you're on this show, you're very, he needs to be careful.
Starting point is 00:08:12 Because he has a shot. You know what I mean? You're right there. You're right there. You're right there. It's funny. It is funny that people... Where is it?
Starting point is 00:08:21 I keep telling people about you. I was talking to Ari about you. I was like, you got, you're a musician. You play the... Trombone. Trombone with the band here. But you're, I mean, you, what schools did you go to? I went to Juilliard for a bit.
Starting point is 00:08:39 Yep. Dropped out, then went to Columbia where I finished. You finished. And what degree did you get in Columbia? Philosophy. Philosophy. Philosophy. He has a podcast, a hugely successful podcast, and it deals with politics, topics, I mean,
Starting point is 00:08:54 it deals with everything, but it's a heavy podcast. It's technically a philosophy podcast. Right. But we did, you know, culture war, politics, all that kind of stuff, but. And, and, and then he has this rap that came out, what was it, no him sent it to me. He's like, you gotta check this out.
Starting point is 00:09:13 And he sent me Coleman's rap and I'm like, fuck. Oh, right. Oh God, I'm gonna have to fucking tell him it's good. Do you know what I mean? Any time somebody sends you, hey, wanna hear my song now? I don't, I don't wanna lie to your face. I've done it before.
Starting point is 00:09:32 Hollywood Bob told Dana's song was good when it came out, you know? And then I hit the button and I was shocked. I was shocked how good the number one, the rap was, but the video was really high end. Yeah. I mean, holy shit produced. Is that you or is that a record company?
Starting point is 00:09:57 Are you, is this what you're doing now? Are you signed? So, I mean, I've been a rapper before I was a writer. What? Yeah, when I was at Juilliard, I was a rapper before I was a writer. What? Yeah, when I was at Juilliard, I was doing hip-hop shows on the Underground scene in Brooklyn. You know, I'm a musician.
Starting point is 00:10:11 I love jazz, I love hip-hop. Right. So I'm very, I'm like an omnivore musically. I like a lot of different genres. So, music-wise, I do everything myself. I produce the beats myself. I write the lyrics, I record it, I mix it. So I do all the music produce the beats myself or I write the lyrics I record it I mix it So I do all the music and I linked up with this guy Ian Pange jewel who's an amazing director. He's done
Starting point is 00:10:33 Commercial work for Nike for Apple for all kinds of Top people and I linked up with him. He did everything video wise, right? It was amazing I mean and make sure you put when we his website and stuff and his scroll that stuff for us, while they're talking. The video is on YouTube now and I was in shot. I walked it twice and then I was like to my wife, you know, from Boston. You got to watch this rap video. She's like, no. Yeah. talking to you. Yeah. I have to do shit. I was like, I feel like a little kid. You gotta watch this video.
Starting point is 00:11:11 But it's amazing. The name of it is. That's for me. Blast for me. It's on YouTube. It's on your YouTube page. But if you, here's the thing. If you watch his, okay.
Starting point is 00:11:23 Keep going. Bring up one of his YouTube clips of his botch-ass. Take the headphones off. I tried it, I can't do it, I can't do it. I didn't get mine. What do you mean you, I feel sick. This is how you live in every other, when the moment you leave the room, you don't have
Starting point is 00:11:34 had fun. If I take my head, how is that uncomfortable? When I have them in, I hear that I'm talking and I'm like, oh, I'm performing. Oh, OCD. I'm on. OCD. But if I'm off, I'm also, I did my podcast for years on my own. So I never trusted I'm talking into the mic enough, because I didn't have a fucking producer.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Right. I just like to know that it's still working. It's a part of me that goes, hey, we are recording. That's how that thing's on. It's that's old producer mentality for me. Interesting. This is your podcast. Now, you watch this podcast.
Starting point is 00:12:02 And first of all, he has the best sound Any part like it's it's you really think that it's crazy and his your voices have not it the way you talk I had play it play it listen You just hear me talking now you got to put your head Well, no you you're different now. Okay. Let me hear Nobody can hear good job. Is this well-produced? I can't hear. Can you hear? I can hear it because I got the headphones in. It sounds great. No one here. No one plugged my headphones in. Thanks guys. I can hear it. And that's me. So quite cheap bar. Wind solar and nuclear. Fuck me. And so I'm sure that ruined the business. This is a really strained experience. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:46 Watching talk to you. Hang on, hang on. I'm not sure. But almost almost not of nuclear. Was it was it was not a deliberate omission? Or do you do you have a preference between those three sources? What do you make? Okay, now stop. This guy, I mean, there's very analytical. It's very thought out. I kind of see what you're saying about the headphones. Right?
Starting point is 00:13:11 There's something nice about it. Okay, well, where's the reply before? I'm not doing it. I have, I have. Like you just never tried headphones. I'm gonna do it and solidarity with you. Thank you. But COVID.
Starting point is 00:13:22 It's been a very anti-grick life. It's so like you listen to your podcast and I listen to it. It's one of my favorite podcasts. Thank you. Because you deal with so many fucking topics and I feel like you're dealing with it from a common sense aspect. I try to. You're not dealing with it from a, your point of view or your religion. You're dealing with it like you're weighing out the facts and you're going over and you're like, this doesn't make sense. And you have the information and you make a solid opinion and you put it out there and I'm like,
Starting point is 00:13:53 okay, I agree with that. I don't agree with everything, but a lot of the stuff I'm like, yeah, that's what I think. I think that and it's crazy to me that through all this shit in the last couple of years, your podcast, or when you do, it's one of the only voices out there.
Starting point is 00:14:13 For me, that's coming from a place of reason. Right. To me. That's amazing. That's exactly what I'm going for. I believe in taking things on a case-by-case basis, issue-by-issue basis, applying common sense and reason to whatever topic, and cutting through people's biases
Starting point is 00:14:32 and ideologies and trendiness to the core of issues, and just asking those common sense questions. But people don't use common sense anymore. I've seen it, you get shit. For saying things that are literally like, this is common sense, people go, oh, you're shit. For saying things that are literally like, this is common sense, you people go, oh, you're doing a not full left position on this, burn this man.
Starting point is 00:14:50 Like, I've seen that, I've seen it. What do you think that is though? I don't like, look, I'm gonna say this and people are gonna be shocked. I'm not that smart. And I'm the wire laughing, it wasn't a joke. But, you know, look, but I do have instincts. I have instincts, I have common sense, and I go with those. And I always try to come from a good place.
Starting point is 00:15:15 You know, I don't know if it's from being sober for so long and, you know, being in that 12-step thing is that I, even, I always try to come from a good place. The right thing, like they say, there's no gray area when it's, God has no gray area. It's right or wrong, and usually that's the case. This is right or wrong for me. I hear you and I don't understand why these people, like it seems like that these people have made politics religion, like Christianity, like in the 90s and 80s, the way the right was so into Jesus and we're going to all die and you have to repent and all the things
Starting point is 00:16:02 you're doing are sins and and we were like, fuck yourself it's just twisted sister it's it's bullshit Aussies the devil and the songs weren't even about the devil the lead Zeppelin and and now it seems like those people that were for free speech and for freedom of creativity and all that shit they're the ones that seem to be trying to take away all that shit now you're the ones that seem to be trying to take away all that shit now. Fuck you, that's a bullshit stance. I'm walking.
Starting point is 00:16:27 Good. Thank God. You noticed like, 20, 30 years ago, it was very normal for a wife and a husband to have different politics. Right. No one would ask, oh, how did you marry a Democrat? How did you marry a Republican? Oh, my mother was, my mother is a Kennedy Democrat,
Starting point is 00:16:44 and my father is a voter? Oh, my mother was, my mother is a Kennedy Democrat, and my father is a vote of a Trump, passed away. But the greatest thing in the world to me was being in the living room by the fire at a Christmas and starting to talk about like conservative stuff and she would come in and just fucking lose her mind. But you know, in two seconds, we're all having cake and having a fun time. Same with my parents. My dad is sort of a we're all having cake and having a fun time.
Starting point is 00:17:05 Same with my parents. My dad is sort of a libertarian. My mom was like a Marxist. Right. She was teaching me about Karl Marx when I was five years old. Wow. Right. But they would disagree about stuff. And there was never an idea that politics is a deal breaker for friendships, relationships, that kind of thing. Nowadays, that's completely changed. Politics and definitely of people in my generation is like the first question I ask if I'm on a Tinder date with someone and I'm looking for something serious. It's like that is the litmus test. But it sort of used to be, okay, he can have different
Starting point is 00:17:38 politics, but if we're from the same religion, that's more important. Now, it's like, it's almost the opposite. I feel like, and I asked this all the time, I did it last night in front of a crowd of young people, what religion are you? And none. They're none. Right.
Starting point is 00:17:56 People, they're none of... What are your religion is their politics? It's their religion is their politics now, their beliefs and shit, they don't even really understand. And it's kind of sad to me. I'm like, oh, well, who the fuck? I don't care who you believe in. I feel like there's, I'm spiritual.
Starting point is 00:18:14 I believe in God. I have to. I'm in a part of a 12-step program. But I kind of want to. I enjoy, you know, the universe and spirituality. I love meditating. I love praying. I do, I don't care, I'm not ashamed of it either. And I don't care if somebody's Christian
Starting point is 00:18:31 and believes in Jesus and wants to baptize people. I don't care about someone's Jewish or Muslim. It doesn't matter to me, you can believe in that stuff because in my eyes, religion is just a positive perspective. The true religion of it, without the greed and the fucked up shit that they do with religion, I think for most average people, it's a positive perspective on their life
Starting point is 00:18:55 where they can, where there's right and wrong. And that helps them find those answers. I feel like now, these politicians are fucking the preachers, and we're believing these people, and the news is the church, and it's scary to me. Yeah, I mean, I do think people have kind of a religion-shaped hole in our souls. And if we don't fill it with something, for most people you're going to fill it with something else. Right. You know, I'm an atheist, I don't believe in God
Starting point is 00:19:27 or any particular religion, but I'm a huge meditator and I've gone to a lot of meditation retreats, silent meditation retreats, and beyond the practice of meditation, I think there are a lot of attitudes within religion that I think are so inspiring and useful. So one that I think is amazing is the idea that everything good in your life, all of your natural talents, anything, anyway, in which you're lucky, has been given to you by God, and you therefore can abuse your privileges, right? You didn't deeply earn any of the good luck that you've had say to be born into a good family
Starting point is 00:20:08 Or if you're naturally very funny or if you're very athletic or whatever it is. This is a gift from God and you have to Bear it gracefully, right? You can't brag about it. You get like that. I think is an extremely healthy attitude to have and It's an attitude I would you know, I think is an extremely healthy attitude to have. And it's an attitude I would, you know, I almost wish I could believe in God so I could have that sort of attitude more easily. But I think in practice, you can replicate that kind of gratefulness even if you don't believe in God. Well, I mean, one of the big things about the program, you know, alcoholics anonymous
Starting point is 00:20:41 is that is being grateful and being humble. That's a big part of it. Being grateful is all over the books. It's one of the things that keeps you away from the desire to fill the whole. If you can just look at what you have and be thankful. It's enough, you know? It is enough. And I don't know, I think now, I mean, what do kids want?
Starting point is 00:21:10 Kids want fame. Kids want money. I never, like coming up, I never thought about being famous. I never thought about money. I think I thought about not, how do I not, how do I do what I like to do, you know what I mean? How do I do something that's cool or fun that I like to do? And I just wound up in comedy.
Starting point is 00:21:32 And now I feel like everybody's trying to get other people to like them or. You feel like that from sort of TikTok type of stuff? It's like even my kid is like, dad, I have to really keep that shit at bay with him because he wants fame. But don't you think people have always wanted fame? I don't think so. I think when I was a kid, I didn't think about fame.
Starting point is 00:22:03 Fame wasn't a thing back then. You know, it wasn't like, you couldn't become famous. Now anybody can be famous at any time. You know, right now we're sitting here. Joe, my producer, could do a TikTok tomorrow that gets him 10 million views and then he's famous. Right. Just like that.
Starting point is 00:22:24 That didn't exist when I was a kid. There was no internet. There was no tea. You know, to, what did I get on TV? You had to like go to California and suck nine dicks and fucking, you know what I mean? And fucking. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:37 There was a lot to being famous back then. There's no barrier to entry on the internet. And there's enough examples of people going zero to 100. You know, what's your name, Charlie Demilio, the most famous TikToker? TikToker, who does the dances? Yeah. Think about all the kids with Vine.
Starting point is 00:22:51 All the girls that look up to her that think, you know, like I like to dance, like I could be the next Charlie Demilio. There's actually, there is nothing stopping you, except for the odds, of course, the astronomical odds against it. Right. But yeah, I do think a lot of the rise of the content creator,
Starting point is 00:23:09 as a person, I'm a content creator, you're a content creator. Right. And there's very little barrier to us having shows now. It's easier than ever to have a show. And you have a following, I have a following. And it's not really fame in the in the in the same sense because probably like how often do you get recognized on the street? A lot. A lot really like how off, but they think I'm Michael
Starting point is 00:23:33 Chichloss. So it's either that. I get I get recognized a little bit, but not, you know, I'm not fucking any Murphy, you know, to like every time you get recognized, it's it's like a surprise. To me, yeah, yeah, same. I can feel it. I know when somebody any Murphy, you know? To like every time you get recognized, it's like a surprise. To me, yeah. Yeah, same. I can feel it. I know when somebody knows me.
Starting point is 00:23:49 Right. I can see it in their eyebrows. You know what I mean? Eyebrows. Yeah, they kind of like, you know, they usually go to a wife, that's fucking. Right. And it's a fantastic feeling. Yeah, it's, and I think, I mean, at, if you have a show like this, usually it's everyone
Starting point is 00:24:04 who knows about you, knows about you because they're a fan. It's like you have a, I have a small but devoted following of people that listening to my, listen to my show. That's not, that's not really fame in this sense of Hollywood fame where everyone knows who you are, people that hate you, people that love you, there's no not knowing who you are, people that hate you, people that love you. There's no not knowing who you are kind of a thing. That seems really toxic to me and I I know you're not supposed to feel bad for famous people, but I do sometimes feel bad for people that have such a level of fame that they just they cannot Have a normal life and I know they've chosen that but it's just it seems really toxic to me. I don't ever feel bad for them. I don't because most of us when we get money out of the bank at ATM we have to make sure that that balance doesn't come up because anxiety will overwhelm you and
Starting point is 00:25:01 you'll feel terrible and you don't want the person behind you to see it. Most of us have to worry about, you know, what phone plan we're on or what TV we can get. You know, most of us have a lot of shit to it. Those people, they don't even handle their money. They don't even handle their children, you know? They don't even handle going to the DMV. So to me, to be that famous, to have that type of, what you have to stay in one of your mansions,
Starting point is 00:25:32 you have to sign some autographs, you have to make people happy with your fucking name, not even your whole name, just the two letters that you scribble on something, or you take a photo with somebody. To me, it's like, there's plenty of places you can go to get away from that. And most people that say, Heidi, just want to be near, they're just, wow, to me, that's pretty fucking amazing.
Starting point is 00:25:57 I don't, and they can say, I just want a normal life. You can have it. You absolutely can have it. Give your money away and go live in a community where you just help people. Go help people, go to India, find water, go down to South America, and you could, you think any Guatemalan people are gonna give a fuck
Starting point is 00:26:18 about them? No. That's not quite a normal life though. Right. But what is a normal life? To me a normal life is what? Having a family, having a roof over your head, having three meals a day, and being happy. You know, like living in the country, you were born in and knowing you can go to a Starbucks and you're not going to get stopped. Well,
Starting point is 00:26:37 I'm Irish. I'm Irish from Boston, but Colin does say that somebody from Guadalmala fucked my grandmother. And that's why I have my these lips so. I don't know, dude. I don't really feel bad for them. I don't feel bad for them. Do you think that that brings any more happiness, though? I don't think it does. I don't think it brings, it might not bring happiness, but it does relieve anxiety, stress,
Starting point is 00:27:01 and fear. What fear do you have when you, you don't have to worry about money? When you take money out of the equation for everybody, forever. I mean most of these people forever don't have to worry about paying a bill. That's a very real privilege of a family. It is a fuck, it is, it's amazing because you can, once you take that out of the mix, a lot of the other shit just goes away. You know, I remember I was talking to somebody. My wife has been with my kid every single day of his life.
Starting point is 00:27:36 You know, we didn't, we don't have a nanny. We never night nurse. And I remember one of my friends, oh, it's so tough. It's so tough with the kids. This person had a night nurse and a nanny. She probably spent fucking two hours a day with her kid. And I'm looking at my wife and her hair's gray and it's fucking fuzzy and she's just exhausted.
Starting point is 00:27:57 I think, stop, stop. It's not the same life, I think. That's the one that we're giving us all this advice. You know, my friend called me up in the middle of it. We're all on the same boat. I think that's why when they were giving us all this advice, you know, my friend called me up in the middle of it. We're all on the same boat. I'm like, no, you own a boat, motherfucker. We're not in the same boat.
Starting point is 00:28:12 I don't have a job. So the question I have is, yes, say you have a lot more money. You have no anxiety. You don't even look at the money in your bank account. You don't have to. But on the other hand, say you're someone like JK Rowling, who is just constantly hounded by the press, people snapping photos into her window
Starting point is 00:28:35 at all hours of the night, people finding her kids at school and leaving notes in their backpack to try to get to mom. It's like, that's a new source of anxiety. And another source of anxiety, most people don't have to worry about. No, I mean, you're right. I mean, yeah, when you find, when you bring things. And if you balance everything out, I'm not so sure that they're happier.
Starting point is 00:28:56 I don't know. I mean, I guarantee you this, if you give them a choice, they wouldn't go back. Do you think, if you gave her a choice to go back to being a nobody, to be a nobody riding in the coffee shop, probably wouldn't go back. I imagine she wouldn't go back. 100% of the time they'd be like, no. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 00:29:13 So are you bitching about, yes, it sucks that your kids get fucked with, but, you know, would you give it all up to go back to obscurity? But who is it? Was it, um, it was Bill Murray. I think that said, whenever a young person comes to him and says they want to be famous, rich and famous, he tells them become rich first and then see if you really want the fame. Understood. So maybe to become, the points you're making actually are mostly just about money. There are lots of wealthy people that aren't famous
Starting point is 00:29:52 that have, they don't have to be, they don't feel that anxiety, but they also don't suffer the costs of fame. You know, I think if you ask JK Rowling instead of that question, if you say, okay, keep on your money, but somehow we'll erase everyone's memory so you don't have to be famous tomorrow.
Starting point is 00:30:08 Do you think she would take that deal? I absolutely would take that deal. But I think I guarantee part of her would miss that fucking accolades. You're gonna stand when somebody to be a creator, to acting, pretending at a high level, you know, that's what it is, which is nuts to me.
Starting point is 00:30:30 Writer, musician, comedian, you know, I don't care who you are, you like the fucking accolades. You like that people recognize you. You like that people wanna do things for you. It feels good, It feels good. It feels good. I was telling somebody about this the other day, I've been famous two times, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:30:54 Like almost there, where I was living the life of famous people, first class, up front, standing next to JLo and a fucking line on a red card. I was there. And of course the whole time felt I didn't deserve it and they're gonna find me out and I'm a fucking fraud. And yeah, but when I was there, I was like, this is amazing, man.
Starting point is 00:31:17 Getting free shit, people doing stuff for you, treating you so good. I don't know how that becomes bad. I don't know how that becomes, you know, you learn not to like that. I understand that, you know, the kid thing or the privacy thing might get anointing, but people loving you for what you do.
Starting point is 00:31:39 Who the fuck, why wouldn't a mechanic love that? You know what I mean? Just, dude, you fixed my carburetid man. I fucking love you. Can I get a plum or fake? I get a shit out of my toilet. Yo dude. It's like cheering fans when he comes out though.
Starting point is 00:31:52 You know, I mean, these people are, you know, it's a hard thing. But it's a hard thing to, I guess, understand on their part. I just don't get it. I think once you have this money and once... ...this is what you want it, and be careful what you ask for, you might get it. Mm-hmm. Dude, fuck off. Cualquier cosa, películas, series, gremene, realitis y contenido infantil. Pluto TV, ven a verlo, sin pagar nunca. that just can't wait to see you crash and be as unsympathetic as possible when you do. Do you think that's new though?
Starting point is 00:32:47 Don't you think that's a little new? What's new? That. That is new, yeah. No, that's new. Like, you know. This is a, this is a get clicks. Yeah, the disease on sorry problem.
Starting point is 00:33:00 Like, do you think a Z's would take back his level of fame? I don't know. You know, because even with what happened to him. No, he dealt with that. Yeah. No, because he dealt with it. He dealt with it head on and it went away. I think he said what you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:33:16 So it was good the way he dealt with it. And think about Louis. But they did to Louis. I mean, I don't know one person, I know who I've talked to, including my mother, who thought he deserved that for what they said he did. Right, same. And it's crazy.
Starting point is 00:33:36 They will, it's like these same people, as soon as they can write something about him, they will. But I do think that's one of the downsides of that level of fame, is that level of scrutiny, right? But that's fame on their end. On who's end? The people who say stuff, all you have to do is say something bad about,
Starting point is 00:33:53 Louie does something, say something bad about him, and then you're getting thousands of people going, yeah, fucking, so now you're famous for taking that side. All you have to do is take a side. You go, if you're with Louis, you're gonna get a bunch of good for you, man, and a bunch of people are gonna fuck you, you're a piece of shit, massage, you know, you like rapists,
Starting point is 00:34:13 and then other people over here, if you like fuck Louis, you're gonna get the same thing, but you have a thing of fame for a moment on social media. And to, it's a weird thing to put a tweet out there over and over and over and getting it eight likes and no retweet. Excuse me, no retweets. And then all of a sudden,
Starting point is 00:34:31 to put something out there, pick a side, put something out there and thousands of people. And you're like, what the fuck is that? When I posted Louis Special, the recent one. The recent one I posted the video first. He sent it to me and I put it on Twitter first. Over 500,000 people saw it. Wow.
Starting point is 00:34:51 My tweet went viral. I mean, the Daily Mail retweeted it. It was fucking crazy. And if I just sit here and say, I didn't like it, if I wasn't looking at that shit, go, I'd be lying to you. Right. It was fascinating to me that so people were looking at it. Bringing it back around though, when your, when your kid talks about liking fame, yeah, can't you relate that? I can, but I, I understand that, you know, for me, you know, fame, it's part of my business.
Starting point is 00:35:29 But if I can, what's happy to me, what makes me happy, what I find to be grateful for the most, is sitting with my family, having dinner at five o'clock or five thirty, playing a record. There he is. Right. Playing a record and looking like, okay, I got it roof over our heads, we got some food on the table,
Starting point is 00:35:54 we're laughing and giggling, and we're enjoying my family that I created. That I, me and my wife worked on that had this kid and we're trying to make him a good kid and he is, you know. I'm like, this is great. To me, that was the American dream growing up. That was what you were trying to get someday. Is a family, a house, and have fun, and go on vacations and do stupid shit together as
Starting point is 00:36:16 a family. To me, that is the American dream. It's never been to become hugely successful. If I became famous and money and stuff like that, you can give me the money from fucking mega-millions. If I went mega-millions, you'll never see me again. I purely see you now. Oh, you'd never see me again.
Starting point is 00:36:37 I swear to God, I'd fucking make one final video and you'd never see me again. The next time you saw me, I'd look at an old guy with a beard and I'd probably be whittling shit in the hamster. You know what I mean? So, I don't know. I just, I think that this whole thing, with Rogan, like you said, as soon as they get them,
Starting point is 00:36:54 it's almost like they help them get up there to rip them down. Right. It's almost like a machine. Right, right? Yeah, I mean, the people have, I think, an insane standard for Rogan, because, you know, like if someone says something that's wrong on CNN or Fox, like if Don Lemon or Tarleson get something wrong about COVID, right? Which they have
Starting point is 00:37:19 and are going to, you know, every one of these shows you're going to make mistakes, they don't have to worry that their show is going to get pulled off the network. Right. They have some level of just because they have that authority and the machine of CNN, MSNBC Fox, Rogan, if you get something wrong, it's like, right. They want to pull you off Spotify for some reason. I think people, he's become really, this is another example, like, because he's so big,
Starting point is 00:37:47 there's a target on his back, and he's symbolic for people. Like, he's the symbol of those, like ignorant white guys that watch his show, and if you want to signal, you hate those, you go for Rogan. He also looks a certain way, and you look at that guy, and you go, he's a meadhead, and he's got these MMA things. And everyone knows a guy that's kind of like that guy, he's like, oh, he's that guy.
Starting point is 00:38:10 Like none of those people listen to the show. None of them, I mean, it's like, I have actually a thing, I'm also trepident on that out of breath from running up to stairs. I don't know if he's that about to, but I thought they did a similar thing to like CNN, you go, well, we already know they're lying, right? With Rogan, and I think they did the similar thing to like CNN, you go, well, we already know they're lying, right? With Rogan and I think they did the same as in Louis.
Starting point is 00:38:28 Is it like when you hear shit, you go like, I know you, I trust you. You're like my guy. And then as soon as it's wrong, they go, well, I, I actually, I don't, no one trusts, it trusts Andersen Cooper, right? But you know Joe so well, the Kis listeners, that you feel like you're connected to them. So the minute they get something wrong, you're like, hey man, I thought I, it's like you're wife cheating on you
Starting point is 00:38:53 because you have such a personal connection. But that makes sense. But how in reality, I mean, when you break it down, Don Lemon, Tucker and all these guys, aren't they just doing a podcast? Isn't it, it's not journalism, it's not news. It's on a news channel, but they're not, they're just doing a podcast, it's an opinion piece.
Starting point is 00:39:15 It's what a podcast is, it's a guy goes on, gets his facts that he likes, and then puts that out there to his people. Isn't that what Joe's doing? Yes, the difference I guess guess, is Joe does it in a more transparent way. So you'll never see Don Lehmann or Tucker Carlson or anyone in the Arachromado on any of these shows
Starting point is 00:39:35 say, I think X, Y, and Z, here's why I think it. I saw this article, Jamie pull it up. The guest says, you know what? I saw this other article that disproves your article. He goes, Jamie, pull that up and you look at the sources. Like you're looking at, it's like looking at the footnotes of an essay in school. And I think that's why for better or for worse, he gets things wrong, surely. But he has a better attitude towards error correcting and approximating the truth.
Starting point is 00:40:03 Then people do on these big networks that present everything as a finished product, we are the capital to truth every night, we never get anything wrong, and that's dangerous misinformation. And the thing, too, to what you said, that people see him and think he's a meathead, people see that, but he's so far from a meathead.
Starting point is 00:40:22 He's super intelligent, he's very, he's very in touch with human beings. He's sensitive. He's not a, he's the father's thing from a meathead. You know, he's very, he's highly intelligent too. But you'll see him though and they just guess. And he, but he's so smart. He says he's stupid. He admits to me when somebody goes, I'm fucking, I don't know. I'm like, that's smart to me. I mean, and he does it all the time. I have no idea about that's why I'm having these people on.
Starting point is 00:40:51 And somebody who apologizes to me is there's something that's something amazing about that. To be at that top, to have that much money and to come out and go, hey man, I make mistakes. I make mistakes and I'll try to do better. And I'm, you know, and, you know, I- It's a great thing. I thought he put out was great. I thought it was excellent.
Starting point is 00:41:15 Yeah, the only thing that's exactly right, he's got to get lighting. I mean, he's natural sunlight. But he does, it's like he's on Mars. That's a apology. It's also him holding the phone in his backyard. He's a apology also was him holding the phone like in his backyard. I mean, dude, the apology was fucking beautiful, but the lighting's. That's kind of lighting and sound. It's like you're a fucking millionaire.
Starting point is 00:41:33 I mean, dude, you get me. Andrew Schultz has a film guy. You know, I would have came. He sent me a couple thousand. I'll fly down. I'll do it for you. Just has Jamie and Jamie has his days off. Okay, it is Jamie's day off.
Starting point is 00:41:44 But to what you're saying though, real quick about the thing about Rachel Maddow and when they come out and they say that shit, Joe is saying things that he believes, at least in the moment even, right? But you know when you're watching the news people that there is people, they're getting most of their information, they're getting most of their beliefs, they're getting a 2%
Starting point is 00:42:02 of what they might actually believe. That's what I think. You know what scares me? They have speech writers. Right. You know. It scares me when you see the news, then you can go on YouTube where they're just saying the same exact thing over and over and over again where they got someone wrote what they
Starting point is 00:42:20 want to put out there and that's what they're pushing. It's like radio guys in the morning. You know what I'm thinking in the morning? Radio guys in the morning have this company that writes bits and they get to buy them. So if you listen to all the radio in the morning, you're gonna hear a bunch of radio guys doing the same exact bit.
Starting point is 00:42:36 But if you're from that town, you're like, these guys are fucking geniuses. That's the funniest thing I've ever heard. Not knowing that in Cleveland, the guys are doing the same exact bit. I feel like the news does that too. Like in the morning of those shows, they go, hey, this is the angle we're taking.
Starting point is 00:42:49 Everyone's going, at least 2% left a right of this fucking angle. If Fox News is like, you know that in the morning, there's a briefing on the stances they're taking. I feel that way at least. Yeah, right. Like, you know what, I'm fucking crazy, I don't know. No, I'm fucking a groom. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:43:03 You want to, I'm sorry. You had me, you had me. You had me, you lost me. I know, I didn't know I'm fucking a grue. I'm sorry. You want to, I'm sorry. You had me. You had me. You had me. You lost me. I know I didn't know how. That should be the name before.
Starting point is 00:43:10 It should be the name of your album. I had you and then I lost you. It's like when your dad gives you a hug. He's never hugged you before. I'm like, I don't know what this is. I've never had you before. I didn't have a dad, so I don't know. I never got hung by a dad.
Starting point is 00:43:20 I got a hubbuck. My Jewish foster father once. You loved him. You wouldn't have tried to do that to him. I did love him. I don't think you just never around Yeah, it's I think it's a it's a it's very weird right now I think what you the fact that they're trying so hard if you look to it's weird. They took out everybody around him first What do you mean who all his friends?
Starting point is 00:43:40 Joe wrote what do you mean that all the guys that were around him, they fucking tried to cancel and did some of them. Yeah. Who are you talking about? Callin, D'Aliah, Ari, they tried to take their shows off Spotify or they just, they went after them. The, the, the progressive left on the fucking woke, we're calling the woke or the, whatever you call them, whatever the fucking kids that call these people in the holidays, they, they took them out. They just went back and found shit. I don't know, it's just weird to me that they took,
Starting point is 00:44:12 they tried to, this thing was becoming so big. All these people are so big. And, you know, we're comics. We're not fucking politicians. We're only trying to make you laugh. At least I can speak for me. So all I'm trying to do is make you laugh, give you some entertaining podcasts,
Starting point is 00:44:30 and enjoy your day. That's it. If you're coming to me for news, you're fucking stupid. You should just give up. If you're coming to me for that. But, and now they're going after him. They keep trying to take him out.
Starting point is 00:44:44 Right. And I don't, it's weird to me. It's fucking crazy that they won't let it go. They're gonna keep going after him. Yeah. Because I don't know. Is he too powerful? No, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:44:56 I think that if you're not saying the exact message that some people want to hear, but also like, when people get famous, they, if I can take a piece of you, I get it. I thought they put the Amy Schumer, everyone was just like a random one, but like, you can be famous from bringing down a celebrity. So everyone's gonna go and take their shot
Starting point is 00:45:13 to see if they can get a little bit of fame from, because he's so famous, they just, if I could say this about him, I'll get a million views. I'll get a minute, that's everybody. This is like the Romans, where they was just like thumps up or thumps down. That's what they're doing now.
Starting point is 00:45:26 They're actually with thumbs to get likes or no likes. Cause you have one thing about Coleman real quick. It's so funny cause all you do is podcast with comedians who don't listen and I'm talking and you just look and you go. And I'm like, when are you gonna cut me off to do your bit? It's very weird to talk to someone who's not fighting you for mic time. Yeah, it's refreshing.
Starting point is 00:45:47 Nothing. I think, um, you know, what, you know, so you just want to hear you. Oh, uh, where's my Utah? I know one of the great, one of the great points, Rogan made is that there have been so many things labeled misinformation at one point that later become mainstream fact or at minimum mainstream debate. Right, right, right.
Starting point is 00:46:08 Like, you know, cloth masks don't work. You should be misinformation. You can still get COVID if you've vaccinated was considered misinformation at first who's considered anti-vax. Right. But is there a leak? Lab leak was considered misinformation now. I love how you're talking.
Starting point is 00:46:21 I'm just cutting you off like I said. No, but the three things that you just said we're all all that's misinformation And now we'll get flagged on Twitter. We'll get flagged. I want to argue something But can I just let me just say one thing really quick and you hold that you hold that in your brain I don't remember things. I don't get it out now. I'll fucking forget it I believe you'll go back to me like I got nothing With all those misinformation, now the cloth masks don't work really.
Starting point is 00:46:50 That's accepted as fact. Okay, right, so all this stuff, and you've never heard anybody come out and go, look, we're sorry, we made a mistake. Right. And that would come from Fauci or somebody who everybody's supposed to be listening to, who was supposed to listen to,
Starting point is 00:47:04 and they still don't do that. There's not like a weekly, hey guys, these are the facts now. It's liquid. We're fucking up, but we're getting shit right. And we're trying, how come nobody comes out and says that? And apologize,
Starting point is 00:47:21 it's like Rogan is the only fucking one of these people that have come out and said, Hey, man, I'm sorry, I'm trying to do my best. I'll get more people on, I'll try to do better. If your game is a phony to begin with, it's possible apologies don't work as well. Rogan's apologies work because we all trust at the minimum, he means what he says.
Starting point is 00:47:42 Right, right, right. Right, right, right. No one doubts that. Right, right. No one doubts that. Right, no. If you're one of these official institutions, if you're a CDC, if you're NIH, FDA, there's this veil. You're much more of a politician. So if you're given apology, it actually only gets used
Starting point is 00:47:59 against you, because no one really feels that it's sincere to begin with, I think. So this actually cuts to that point, right? Of like, I want to like, kind of define what misinformation is, right? Because when you talk about misinformation, I would go, Tucker Carlson, who goes on and says, shit, that he knows is wrong, is misinformation. But when the CDC or someone comes out and says,
Starting point is 00:48:20 cloth masks work, at that time, they did. But as science, that's the whole thing about science, is the more you learn, then you pivot and you change. So I would say that the masks and a lot of that stuff isn't misinformation so much as we've learned, we've moved forward now. I have the moment. We've moved forward now.
Starting point is 00:48:40 You thought if he killed both of us. I like it because real. Well, okay. The reason I disagree with that is is because I think sometimes the CDC and and Fauci and, you know, these, these regulatory bodies calculatedly bend the truth for the quote unquote public interest. And Fauci has actually admitted to this now. He said, regardless of what you think about this, he's admitted to that. He initially said we needed to get to 70% for herd immunity,
Starting point is 00:49:16 70% vaccination or whatever, to herd immunity. Back when only 50% of people were saying they wanted to get the vaccine. He was basically, his philosophy was meet the American people where they're at. So, if half of people say they'll take the Vax, I'll push the number that we need to get to to 70. When 60% of people say they'll get the Vax, I'll start talking about 80%. Kind of like your mom's saying, if you get a B, whatever, but it's like, I actually want
Starting point is 00:49:42 you to get an A, but it's the way to try to get you to get you to. I'll give you a B. Can I give you a better, better, like, you're not, you're no longer dealing with truth, you're dealing with, right? I want to give you a better example, because that one he gave you was kind of shit. Basically, when your mom wants you home at, at, at seven, right, for dinner, she'll tell you, you have to be home at six, right? Right. So you'll be home at same mom that's missing from me that's dangerous missing from it so you'll be
Starting point is 00:50:08 home at seven yeah right because she knows you're gonna be an hour late that's like if I were to put you in a treadmill I'd say get to a half hour and then when half hour comes I just keep you on for a little bit longer because I know what's healthy so you went to a fat joke okay that's what you went right to the gutter yes we have my feelings were her coming on now So could you bring it up a little bit? I love the Bobby cereal. We're talking to Coleman Hughes here And I use it like I have fat fucking brick But anyway, and then oh sorry the other example So in like late January we now know from from the emails coming out from Fauci and Collins that
Starting point is 00:50:48 they you know Fauci got like 10 virologists into the meeting to talk about where this virus came from is it from a lab did it come from nature and Several of the virologists say this looks consistent much more with it with a lab. Mm-hmm leak say this looks consistent much more with it with a lab leak. These are like the virologist he trusts immediately Francis Collins and Fauci say, well, we can't it would be too much chaos. It would feed into conspiracy. Yeah. Immediately they're thinking about the optics for them, the optics, you know, public interest and so forth. So they deal with it later. Make a push. So like that's another example of like misinformation
Starting point is 00:51:25 where it's not like the science truly got updated. Right, right, right. That there were political considerations and or sort of benevolent lying. Sure. And I'm not sure if lying is ever benevolent. But I don't believe in that. That's their philosophy at least. Right. You could argue they're coming from, they think they're doing the right thing in some of these cases. And other these cases, they're just covering their asses because they funded the lab and so John Stuart, John Stuart was right when he was on the fun music lab leak. I mean, I mean, what how the fuck did we get to a place in the world where comics are the only one giving honest news and giving the people
Starting point is 00:52:04 the only I mean huh we go but we say they go we're going once giving not a smooth and then we go but don't listen to us because we're not the fucking news We're still well because do we it's like we don't want to be role models either you know name him We want to we want to be able to fucking talk about pussy and yeah and do dick jokes and shit too, you know I make fun of each other but you know John Stuart when he was saying this on on the whatever dumb show that is a Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:28 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:36 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:44 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah to be around their filth. Wait, what? Colbert, when he does standups on the show, they like tape them all in one day. And I don't think he's there. It's like a whole thing. Like the standup thing was you stand up, comedians comes on. They watch. It's like, and real and you go over me. You shake the guy's hand, but like he does not like standup comedy, which is and he's a fucking comedian.
Starting point is 00:53:02 Colbert doesn't like standup. Because he's an improv sketch guy. And for some reason, he just doesn't like standup. It's a fucking comedian. Colbert doesn't like stand up. Because he's an improv sketch guy. And for some reason he just doesn't like stand up. Yeah. It's a weird division. Well, he ruined a fucking legacy. Right. It means gone.
Starting point is 00:53:13 I like the Colbert reporter. Yeah, that was funny. That was like a great show. Yeah, when he played that character. Yeah, it was funny. And then he was yelling at me about fucking. You don't you? Yeah, he was yelling at me at night.
Starting point is 00:53:22 I would call me a fucking idiot. Because I like family values. Ain't it, man? Oh, God was yelling at me at night. I would call me a fucking idiot because I like family values. Hey, you know what I mean? Oh God, what a fucking asshole. I can't stand him. I can't stand him. We should go get him, let's go get him. It's just because, man, you know why I like to be
Starting point is 00:53:36 in the Matrix. Those shows, like when I go to a movie, I don't wanna be smashed over the face with what's going on in the real world. I wanna go away for a little bit. When I watch a late night show, I just want to laugh and be entertained, and I just like the way it used to be,
Starting point is 00:53:52 and maybe that's because I'm an old fucking fart, but I don't like having to deal with, and if you're gonna do it, make it funny. For everybody, don't just do one fucking side, and don't do Trump every night. Some of it was funny, but then it was like, oh, God, here he goes again. I just actually had Jeffrey Mauer on my podcast to talk about this, who used to be the senior writer for the John Oliver show. Right. And I actually sent you one of his articles a couple months ago.
Starting point is 00:54:19 Oh, yeah, he was talking about Conan show. How much he liked how Conan show never really got into politics, which is like silly hilarious funny, and it was like this oasis of a non-political space where you could get away from politics. And now politics is encroaching into everything. It's like, you know, it's it's in M&M's. It's in's, you can't get away from it. Yeah, they fucking the M&M girl was too slutty. They, but she was. She was a whore. She should have saw her around town.
Starting point is 00:54:52 But let me ask you, let's, no, their body, their right, okay? We had a DACA out to fuck her window. You want to be a whore, you can be a whore M&M. I hope that she had sexy shoes on, but no clothes. Well, whatever, it doesn't matter. That's how I like my girl. She's the one you left in your mouth a little long, you sucked on her.
Starting point is 00:55:09 Hey, yeah, it doesn't even make sense to me. The world is so fucking upside down. It's like, it's what I loved about when, you know, girl comics respect me. Men are set scumbags. All male comics talk about as fucking, as soon as the pandemic, they were on fucking, they were on the stupid.
Starting point is 00:55:28 What is that? Only fans showing their assholes making French toast for 20,000 a month. Go fuck yourself. Go fuck your respect to me. Yeah, go make that French toast. A minute. Open up your ass cheeks.
Starting point is 00:55:41 Let me see that thing. I'm paying $5 a month. Someone said, I'll give you $2 a month to see the bottom of the balls, Greg. I would go, absolutely. I'll take that thing. I'm paying $5 a month. Someone said, I'll give you $2 a month to see the bottom of the balls, Greg. I would go, absolutely. I'll take that too. Dude, take that too. I'm so sad that I'm not hairier because I could be a fetish. And if I could be a fetish, I could just go in my shower, put a camera, sit on a bench, and just show my hairy tints and balls for fucking 20G.
Starting point is 00:56:03 You are a fetish. You've never been to comics that look like turtles.com? You're like a wither without the shell. Oh, I'm a fat don of tello. I would love to be a fuck. I would love to be a fuck. I would love to do something like that. How are you doing? It is not, what's that? I said me too.
Starting point is 00:56:33 Yeah. Not the hashtag, how you doing folks? What are we doing? Mover and when along? How are you? I'm fantastic, man. I feel the winter, man. I want to hold a New York.
Starting point is 00:56:42 I want out. I don't know if I can make it through this rebuild. I've been through one. I came here in the early 90s, the hookers on 43rd Street, and the, you know, the fucking homeless people and the meat packing district and the fucking robberies and Washington Square,
Starting point is 00:57:01 and I saw it slowly transform to the fact where I was like, this is too clean now. I want some filth back in the city and now it's back. I kind of feel like this new mayor might be a good thing because he's, and look, I know nothing about him, and I did zero research, but he was a cop. I think he's a secret Republican. And you have, my whole thing is, look, this is all
Starting point is 00:57:20 a pie bullshit, but you need a liberal, you need a Republican to be mean and racist and clean shit up and then you put a liberal in to go, hey man, stop being racist and mean and clean it up. And right now, I think it's, you need the two sides, and I think he's gonna be a little bit, I think he's right wing enough to try to get the cops working again.
Starting point is 00:57:36 I feel bad. But this is based on nothing I only know. I mean, it's based on the signals he's been given. He's been giving. Yeah, I'm totally, I mean, you could have backed me up on some shit that I don't even know if it's true. I think everything you said is right about Eric Adams.
Starting point is 00:57:48 He's definitely been giving this signal. He is pro cop, pro like sort of, I mean, listen, he got elected on an anti-crime platform by... I thought it was an anti-red, black and Hispanic New Yorkers. Right, I decided to make a joke. I'm gonna piece of shit. I'm gonna have to go home and never come back to me. Anyway, no, but I agree with what you say.
Starting point is 00:58:08 I think that my nose, he's, yes, we're going back to school. We're not doing school from home like Chicago. He just says it. Yeah. And he does not, he's anti progressive. He is not with the progressive Democrats hate him. The governor though, I like the signals Democrats hate him. But the governor though, I like the signal she's been given.
Starting point is 00:58:27 The governor's progressive. Yeah. She's progressive. Yes. And she's just fucking vetoed that, we're gonna wear those masks to march what, seventh to 14th now? Is that what it is?
Starting point is 00:58:38 Mess wear, what, I thought we could not wear them in restaurants now. No, she said fuck you and put it back in until the march something. You have to wear masks. It's so stupid to me too. It's just like, you know, a chick's in there with a fucking kit mask. Yeah. How did you get that? The fuck are you doing? You know, the guy, the other guy's got his mask. And then we just sit there and eat in a restaurant with no masks, talking, screaming, yelling, and the poor waitress can't even breathe.
Starting point is 00:59:06 Yeah. It's the dumb. And it's funny too, because if you said at the beginning, no, you don't need masks. They won't work, they don't work. I'm like, okay, I gave around 50 masks away. I had a whole shitload of fucking N95s. That he ordered.
Starting point is 00:59:23 I did. We're fighting for that. Yeah, I'll hold it. I'll fucking kill everybody. I I'm okay. I did. I did. Fuck yeah, I'll hold it. I'll fucking kill everybody. I'll kill everybody. I already told my wife, we're fucking murdering this whole neighborhood. We're stealing all this shit. I'm killing the people next door gone first.
Starting point is 00:59:34 Taking whatever rice they have is our rice. And the guy next door though, I'm going to have a coalition. I'm going to join teams with Pat next door because he's undercover cop, young, good-looking guy. He's got a fucking Trump flag. He's got all these, got the cop flag, the American flag and the Trump flag and the backyard. I'm going to him, I'm gonna join forces with him. He's got an ATV.
Starting point is 00:59:57 Fucking guy crush three firefighters. We'll get him for a little bit. The single lady across the street gone. Done. I'd take a half ass point, I thought of the right to give me a trouble. This is probably what I was thinking about. Yeah. Everyone right now is very big on racism, right? And I'm like, yes, racism exists.
Starting point is 01:00:12 But no one seems to give a shit about if I went on, this is what the thought I had. And you could put this is this is going to be good. If I went on Twitter and wrote, I hate black people. No likes, no retweets, lose my job. Fine, I don't have a job, we're talking about it. But if I went online and wrote, I hate conservatives or liberals, there'd be retweets, there'd be people being like, yeah, he's fucking right.
Starting point is 01:00:35 So we're not worried about this complete hatred. Can I stop here? Right here, it's crazy, because I'm pretty sure, if you wrote, I hate black people, you'd get a couple of retweets. You're right, you're right. I'm pretty sure if you wrote a hey black people. Yeah, you'd get a couple Regions. I'm pretty sure Coleman and me would read you a No, but I guess you kind of see what I'm saying get a free parlor account
Starting point is 01:00:55 I think there's a complete like comfortability with just hating your neighbor right now and it's not like no one's looking at that I'm like start loving your fucking the people that, yeah, but here's the thing is that, I feel like everybody's racist. I'm probably shouldn't say that. Everybody has racist, funny racism in them. We just are, it's like fucking, you know, I am some of the funniest shit I've ever heard is from Keith and Patrice and, you know,
Starting point is 01:01:21 black friends about fucking people's asses. Well, a little bit, everyone I always say that this joke never works. You need a little bit, right? Like here's why I say, my wife is Asian. My wife is one of the best drivers in the world. Why? Because growing up, everyone's like, Asians can't drive.
Starting point is 01:01:36 She went, yeah, so she made sure she was a great fucking driver. Because that's how we keep people struggling. Has no ass. You know what I can think, don't say that about my wife. My wife is Asian. Why does she have no ass. You know what I can say that about my wife. She's Asian. Why does she have an ass? You'll never know. But I'm a great dancer.
Starting point is 01:01:51 Because why people are no touristy, no for not dancers. There's no way you're a good dancer. Come to a wedding with me, you piece of shit. Everybody's a good dancer at a wedding. What do you mean, just with no music in the middle of a podcast studio? No, I'm not a good dancer. I got probably. I'll go right now.
Starting point is 01:02:05 I like the Nala if I want a bouquet. How no discreet. How do you? I don't like the way you're not you're standing my bits. All right, sorry, buddy. This is why we need improvisers. This is why Colbert hates standups.
Starting point is 01:02:18 I don't know, dude. I think most of the shit is class, to be honest with you. And it's not, people are culturally different, man. I do, yeah. Yeah, I think a lot of this class culture and race, and often when we think we're talking about race, we're talking about some mixture of class and culture.
Starting point is 01:02:40 I think so. Yeah, we talk, actually, we talk about this outside of VU, because I think, because we're we talked, actually we talked about this outside of the view because I think, and I think it's from the exact same area, it's a very diverse area. There was a vice article that wrote about Bloomfield, which is on North and on the South End. The North End is very wealthy. The South End is very poor.
Starting point is 01:02:58 They kept, I forgot exactly how it went, but it was like the cops are like, they're going after minorities. And I'm like, no, they're not. The cops are way shittier in the South end because it's poor. If you told me that the North end, eat like more black people in Dominicans and Puerto Ricans were getting beat up in the North end, then that's your story, but it's not. It's the South end that's getting fucked up
Starting point is 01:03:20 because this is where the poor people are. And, but no one looks a little bit further. And I know that because cops used to fuck me up in the South End. And I'm just a Gino. I just think, I think too, it's culturally has a big thing. Like I don't look man. I don't hate Indian people,
Starting point is 01:03:36 but I'll never go to an Indian wedding. She's don't, I don't, see you later. For my hate Indian people, I gotta cut. What? I just, I just,'t, see you later. I hate Indian people. What? I just, I just, it's fucking seven days. I don't wanna, I don't wanna do it. I don't wanna do seven, I hate weddings. I hate regular weddings.
Starting point is 01:03:53 Wow. I mean, I don't know, I mean, they're a long, you know, it's a process, you know, but I don't hate Indian people. I just don't culturally, I don't, I don't want my son to marry an Indian girl, just because I don't wanna deal with that wedding, you know, seven days in the look like a troll fucked me, you know?
Starting point is 01:04:10 Yeah, how long are they about three days? Oh, sorry. Okay. Yeah, three day wedding. Get this information. Yeah, there it is right there. I know right? It's so weird now you but here's a problem because you're you're not a You seem on your podcast dude. You seem very serious and very bestats. And I'm very glad to have this person on my podcast. The, you know, the ramifications of what was said on the justifications of the example of the, it's so very serious. But you're not, you're very fun, dude.
Starting point is 01:04:42 I mean, I went to that barbecue with you over at Nome's house And we had a blast you fucking lit up a stug. We talked shit Plus I came down here and seeing you're wailing on your trombone and fucking killing it with the band Mm-hmm, and you do comedy too, but you're a pussy and you won't get on stage I've done like three or four open mics where oh God at What's the place is east side? East side, yeah. You did it? Five minutes, 10 minutes, 15.
Starting point is 01:05:11 Five minutes, five minutes. Five minutes, and it was open mic. Yeah. And what happened? It was good. I was, I was, I was like middle of the pack. Really? I didn't find the bomb.
Starting point is 01:05:22 What was it? What was what? What were you talking about? Oh, God. I mean, I had, I didn't what was it? What was it? What was what what were you talking about? I mean I had I Have one bit about the You know how people were saying black people shouldn't take the vaccine because of the Tuskegee experiment Yeah, just like you know they they left syphilis untreated and black men and 70s or ever. I love that I said yeah, but you didn't believe me. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:05:50 Hey, no listeners. Thank you. Do your listeners. Thank you for that. No, the details of a historical sister. You are here. I was like, yeah, and you're like, well, that's what happened. Are you absolutely right in doing that?
Starting point is 01:06:04 I just said yes. I heard Tuskegee now. I knew it was a black thing. I didn't want to break this. Those guys flew planes, right? Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, for the listeners, not for you.
Starting point is 01:06:16 Scientists were okay killing black people in an experiment. It was, it's a huge shameful episode right from the 70s, right? And so they were saying, you know, a lot of black people were saying, well, I'm not going to take the vaccine because remember what they did in the Tuskegee experiment, that, you know, they're, this vaccine, they're trying to kill us blah, blah, blah, blah. Right. We don't trust the white man, that whole stick. And there was an article to that effect. And when I read it, I was thinking,
Starting point is 01:06:47 is this written by those same scientists from the Tuskegee experiment? Because you're trying to get black people killed by not taking the vaccine, right? That's funny, yeah. So it was like, there's just like a, and you know, just like bits pointing out hypocrisy on stuff or just random shit. Yeah
Starting point is 01:07:05 I mean you can't I feel you have to write because of where you're at your brain is and your podcasts and your persona You can't do pussy jokes. I Guess I can't you know, yeah, you can't probably can't I don't know if it would even work It wouldn't work the way I It's not really the way that I'm funny. No, it would be funny to me. It would be funny to be funny to people. That's not the way I'm funny.
Starting point is 01:07:29 Out of the blue after all these other jokes, and just at the end, you went like, Pussy's weird looking, right? I can't kill me. It kind of looks like, and you got a great analogy, but what Pussy looks like. And then one night a good night.
Starting point is 01:07:45 That would be great to me. But it's fucked up, man. It's a weird thing now to, I feel like you can't say shit anymore on stage. Like, you have to think about something, and then you have to go fuck it. I'm just going to do it and take the hit. You have to think about something and then you have to go fuck it. I'm just gonna do it and take the hit. You have to like steal yourself. Yeah, well before you just went on stage, you just wanna stage and we're funny.
Starting point is 01:08:12 And if you said something fucked up, you know, whatever, it was over and gone and they went, ooh, and that was it. Ooh, that was the, when you went, ah fuck, I gotta take that out. You know what I mean? So one face like that was fucking stupid, but you, nice, say something wrong and you fucked.
Starting point is 01:08:29 Someone goes to the post, or goes through a newspaper, goes on the fucking website, and you're on a yelp thing, this one, and I said one thing in a comedy on state, have this joke where somebody called me more of the obese, when it all happened, they're like, you're more of the obese dude, you can't go out. And I was like, that's the fucking end word for fat people.
Starting point is 01:08:49 And this group of black people got so offended, they walked out of the room and went to the owners and complained about me how fucking racist I was. Interesting. And I was like, are you really like that's fucking, that's like, and they were so fucking fuck you. That's racist. A white guy said the N word.
Starting point is 01:09:13 And they didn't even look at the context of it. Like I'm relating to fat people are fucking, where are people too? Did you say that N word or say the phrase N word? I said is the N word for fat people right. Yeah. So is there a difference? No, I mean, you know, saying the word as opposed to saying, no, I would never say the word. Not you fucking they were still offended. Never say that word fucking no, it's interesting to me about the N word is I just
Starting point is 01:09:38 finally for the first time finally watched the OJ documentary, the five episode OJ documentary. Yeah, and They're talking about the Mark Furman tapes. Yeah, should we allow the jury to hear this is this relevant and the The prosecution Chris Darden made the case that black people cannot hear this word and remain objective like the word is too deeply emotional for us that we can't, a jury has to be objective. We can't allow them to hear this word because it's going to short
Starting point is 01:10:12 wire, you know, short circuit their rationality, prevent them from being objective. Yeah. And then Johnny Cochran got up there and said, I can't believe he just said that race is bullshit. The idea that black people, you know, can't, like, can't believe he just said that racist bullshit. The idea that black people can't be objective after hearing this word is patronizing and racist and blah, blah, blah. And Johnny Cochrane's view was widely seen as the sort of, I don't know, it kind of won the day. Like people sort of liked Chris Darden until they heard Johnny Cochran's
Starting point is 01:10:51 rebuttal. And it, it struck me that today, there are so many examples where people are basically making Chris Darden side of that argument. People are basically saying black people are too fragile to ever hear the N word, uttered, it doesn't matter the context, it doesn't matter he was saying it to quotation marks. It doesn't matter that executive at Netflix, like Jonathan Friedland or whatever. He said the word and it was in the meaning
Starting point is 01:11:23 about what words they should allow in comedy specials on Netflix, right? They were saying, where is the line? What are we going to allow comics to say? And he, in that context, said the N word and got canned for it. And the professor at that college that he, in Mandarin, did you hear about the story? In Mandarin Chinese, there is a phrase that's pronounced nega, nega. Right.
Starting point is 01:11:49 And it's basically their equivalent of um and like. Right. If you listen to any Mandarin speakers on the subway, you're going to hear nega, nega, nega, nega. They're saying um, um, like, like, right? And so a Mandarin professor at this college says it and he gets like suspended, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:09 Speaking Chinese, because some students misunderstood or willfully misunderstood or whatever. Because it's power. It's power. Yeah. It's like, I mean It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, to talk about it. It's like, what the fuck? We can't even have conversations anymore about words, and you know, like the guy at Netflix, who took his job?
Starting point is 01:12:53 I mean, you know what I mean? Like when you- Sort of the culture took his job. Well, you know what I mean? I'm sure the people under him were happy to get that position. Right. I'm sure there was a lot of people in that room
Starting point is 01:13:04 that didn't like him. If he was well liked and everybody loved this guy and everybody was happy there, if there was no greed or a fucking underhandedness or if people didn't, I'm sure people didn't like him wanted this fucking, was he a white dude, right? Yeah, get him the fuck out. And he said it and right now where we he was. Yeah, get him the fuck out. Right. And he said it.
Starting point is 01:13:26 And, you know, right now, where we're at and we can get him out. He said this word, goodbye. See, there's nothing he could do about it. Who's gonna back him up? They want that. They want him gone. They want that position.
Starting point is 01:13:37 There's more power. And they use that. It's very cynical. That's the thing about so much of these culture war sort of cancellations that happen. Yeah. It's not a rule that's applied consistently across the board. It's a rule that's applied for usually white guys, like often guys, that may not be totally well liked. You know, Mike Peska is another example who got fired, well, he didn't technically get fired,
Starting point is 01:14:06 but left slate was pressured to leave slate, not for saying the N word, but for questioning whether that other guy, Don McNeil was okay. So it was like so many layers removed from the actual word. Yeah. But it's a way of getting rid of
Starting point is 01:14:21 inconvenient people, people who don't always toe the ideological line. And so it's very cynical. And it really, it only survives if it's perceived as sincere. So it's always going to come with this act of, I'm so hurt, I'm so wounded. active I'm so hurt I'm so wounded. Right. The victim. Yes. But meanwhile, like if like joy, joy read on MSNBC,
Starting point is 01:14:49 the stuff she wrote about gay people like 10 years ago on her blog. Nothing. Oh, it doesn't matter. Oh, we can figure out. We can figure it. Yeah, she got how to do. Well, it's because maybe she's well liked. She's blah, blah, blah.
Starting point is 01:15:02 She's needed. She's needed. She's needed for them. Right. She says the things that a blah. She's needed. She's needed. She's needed for them. Right. She says the things that a sane person wouldn't say. Right. She does the things that a person with a sane mind wouldn't do. You know, somebody who has empathy and ethics
Starting point is 01:15:19 and believes in righteousness wouldn't be on that, you know, say the things and do the things that she does. and believes in righteousness wouldn't be on that, say the things and do the things that she does. So she's needed because those people are hard to come by, like ruthless people. And a lot of those news people are on both sides. Can you imagine the type of person that writes an opinion on their blog,
Starting point is 01:15:43 gets discovered years later as having had this opinion, and actually tries to go for the lie that I was hacked. Yeah, it's sincerely like guys, like I have no idea. We have to look into this, we have to get an invest. I mean, the level of dishonesty. It's crazy to me. It's a crazy person. It's an actor. It's fucking, I'm telling you, man, this business, that's why comics, we're kind of, we're kind of, you can't get us because our fans are all we need. And we only need a thousand of them to make a living.
Starting point is 01:16:20 I only need a couple thousand people to go to my shows every year and I can live the way I'm living right now, and probably put my kid through school, and enjoy my life. I mean, Joe Rogas-Lucky's got a fucking 10s of zillion dollars in the bank, but what does he do?
Starting point is 01:16:36 Fucking hunt moose and fucking eat Al-Carton, fucking and do jiu-jitsu. He's not really doing, he's using it. You know what I'm saying? He doesn't have boats and shit, right? Comics, we, we kind of hold each other to the flame. You know, you can't just go out there and say stupid shit. Oh, we will all talk about you. Right. We will all trash you. It's just it. You do something stupid and we're going to make fun of you. Right. Because that's what we do. We go and we make fun of stupid, silly
Starting point is 01:17:04 shit like that. And they hate that we don't have to ask them anymore. We used to when Ray Romano and you had these shows and Roseanne and TV, there was three channels and you made fucking the gazillion dollars if you could go on and pitch your show and the execs like you're there. And that doesn't exist for us anymore.
Starting point is 01:17:25 We're all canceled. We're all, if you haven't been canceled, you can be canceled. They'll just go back and find something that you did when it was okay to do. You know what I mean? And they'll try to take you at whatever the fuck they want. So we don't give a fuck anymore.
Starting point is 01:17:42 I'm a comedian. I do stand up comedy. I'm going to do comedy, you know, the seller. I'm going to do my gigs on the road. And hopefully I become more successful and stand up and people come and see me. But the option of becoming like a fucking being in a Marvel film, it's not an option anymore. The option of having a sitcom on NBC. I don't know, who's in the next Hulk movie? I couldn't be Hulk. It could be the thing, maybe.
Starting point is 01:18:11 The thing, you could be the thing. I could be Thor in fucking in the end game when he was fat. Yeah, but I mean, I could be Kingpin. But yeah, it's, so that's why we're, you know, if anybody did that shit in the community and people do, people say stupid shit, you guys got like Jimmy Doar and Rogan and Shultz and, you know, Burr and, and, and, and, there's a ton of podcasts that are out there just being honest and vulnerable and trying to say what they think is righteous, right? And then you get the news that has some weird fucking agenda. And it's not working anymore. That's what's so beautiful. The ratings, it doesn't, it worked.
Starting point is 01:19:01 So, but here's the thing, here, the fundamental difference between comedy and all this other stuff is that laughter is involuntary. And if you imagine the equivalent of laughter for like news and punditry, what is it? It's like thinking that was a good point, right? I've ever like, Yeah. Righteous, you know, who are the bad people? That kind of thing is much more liable to fakery, phoniness, manipulation, right? Like Tucker, on lemon, those kind of guys, yeah, they can,
Starting point is 01:19:42 they can get someone on the show, yell at at them pretend they've made no good points and do really well with their audience Right whereas a comic trying to make people laugh in order to make people laugh you have to appeal to something that goes past their prefrontal cortex straight to their gut and Is funny right and you can get people laughing at a joke cortex straight to their gut and is funny, right? And you can get people laughing at a joke that they actually don't agree with the underlying point. If you ask them the next day, it's like a billber,
Starting point is 01:20:17 kind of anti-feminist type joke. You will have a hardcore feminist laughing because the joke is too good. The way it structure is just like perfect. Yeah. Whereas if a serious person tries to make the point he was making seriously, they would just say, no, that's a horrible point. It's sexist.
Starting point is 01:20:34 It's blah, blah, blah. So it's laughter is kind of tamper-proof. Yeah. Whereas pretending something's a good point in the public discourse space is, it's very easy to pretend, right? You're right about everything that no one on the other side is making a good point, but laughter and comedy is very insulated from that kind of phoniness. One of the greatest things I've seen, an example of that is when Burr was working on a special in the, he was coming to New York, just doing sets. And he had a abortion joke.
Starting point is 01:21:05 And I remember going over the V, and it was all young girls. Mostly girls. Was it the baking, the kind of baking? Yeah, it was like, you know, you say I had a baby, that was my baby. It's not a baby. Well, it would have been. You didn't knock it over. And I just walked.
Starting point is 01:21:23 You put a cake in the oven and you just take it out after 10 minutes. And you're like, what, it wasn't even a cake? Well, it would have been. Yeah, if you did, yeah, exactly. You knock it on the ground. Right. You hit the panel on the floor. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:21:33 But I remember watching the crowd and they were so fucking wanted to hate him. But it was too funny. He got him. They were laughing. He got him at the end and they bowed their head and they covered their mouths and I shouldn't be laughing at this, you motherfucker, that was funny.
Starting point is 01:21:49 And that's what I love. That's why I love comedy. That's why I think that people are turning to us for podcasting because we are making shit funny and we're talking about shit in a real way and we can't be phony because the ones that are phony it's not funny and we will fucking you'll get called out right you know if Rogan was doing stupid shit believe me we'd all be like fucking you know Nikki Glazer sang a song about Bob Sagitt
Starting point is 01:22:21 and everybody in the world me fun of the next day. She was bummed about it, but listen, you know, you did, you went and wrote a song. We're gonna make fun of you. I'm sorry. It's what comics do. We're not actors. You know it's coming. I know you wanted to have that song go out there and have us all, hey man, that was fucking beautiful. Fuck you. Bob just died and you wrote a song, what? You know what I mean? So I love it. I love comedy.
Starting point is 01:22:52 It is. It's a Teflon man. But you know, it's weird too. You're a musician. It makes me sick how good you are. It makes me fucking angry how like you're smart, you're actually cool, you're not an asshole. I'm blushing.
Starting point is 01:23:14 You're a good looking guy. Wow, you play an instrument well, you have a successful podcast and what made me furious is when your rap was good. I really made me go fuck God. Damn it God. What you know what I mean? I'm just looking at my stomach.
Starting point is 01:23:34 I gotta go can't have a carb. I have no hair. What the fuck man? I got nothing in my hairs. We're seeing two man. Yeah, but it still looks God. Damn you still look like that magician What's his name? What's the magician's name?
Starting point is 01:23:50 Was his name David Blaine. Yeah, you know, how do I look like I look like David Blaine? Yeah, you would stay with Blaine Look like oh bring David Blaine you know David Blaine get the fuck out of here. I've seen videos a long time ago But David plays the best I feel like I would have remembered him if he looked like me as what I'm saying. And I don't remember him that much. No, he looks like you. A little bit. A little bit. Yeah, that's you, dude. Okay. That's you as a, but I don't even know what he is. Looks like you a little bit, right?
Starting point is 01:24:18 Listen, we're gonna play, we're gonna play, we're gonna go into overtime. Now, I don't know where Greg went. Greg, this is why, Nicole, what the fuck? Did he say he's gonna leave twice? No, I had no heads out about either of them. Is he doing two sets? I hate Greg, Stone right now. This is what I hate comics.
Starting point is 01:24:39 This is why comic suck, because they will leave you to do a set, a tenement and set. I mean, he's, oh, fuck him. Is he coming back? Can you call him? Yeah. And see if he's coming back. Anyways, we're gonna go into overtime right now. But as we do, we're gonna transition.
Starting point is 01:24:54 I wanna play your video. That way, if it gets flagged, we can cut it out. But I wanna say, we're gonna play his video right now. It's a brand new video. It's on your YouTube page. What is that again? ColdXman, COLDO-L-D-X-A-M-X-M-A-N. It just makes me angry that you're smart, nerdy, cool. You're like this, everything man.
Starting point is 01:25:16 You know what I mean? I'm blushing. You're like, yeah. Because I'm black, but I'm blushing. You're like, you're like, Elon Musk fucked Lenny Kravitz. Oh my God. It makes me mad. Didn't you show up with a hot chicken at norms once? Yeah, you date smokers. You date smokers. And I know you get them with the fucking trombone too.
Starting point is 01:25:44 And then they find out you're fucking intelligent. Oh my God. How long have you been doing your podcast? Two years. Two years, okay. You gotta check out his podcast. It's one of my favorite podcasts. And we're gonna talk about this too,
Starting point is 01:25:56 because you get fucked with too, because you don't toe a line. You get fucked with, you get called Uncle Tom. People fuck with you all the time. Cause you say things to me in a common sense. But people don't like it. People want you to fucking get your shit together. And that must be tough.
Starting point is 01:26:14 So, I'll talk about that. Stick around, it's not over yet. This episode of YKWD is continuing now exclusively on patreon.com slash rubber kelly. See you there. Um, listen, we're going to play your video now, we're going to do your plugs. You are Coleman Hughes and I, I'm telling you, if you guys have a podcast, you guys got to have them on. I told Ari he's gonna have you on.
Starting point is 01:26:45 Do as well. Yeah, I would love to. Yeah, absolutely. I don't know why Rogan, I don't know why he hasn't had you on. You're so fucking interesting. I would love to go. Get this, get his podcast and get his stuff from front of Rogan.
Starting point is 01:26:57 You absolutely should be on Rogan. You're so fucking smart. And you're funny and you talent it and he should have you on. I'm saying that right now. Thank you. And now do me. I'm going to do this show again. Before you do Rogan, we'll run this a few more times.
Starting point is 01:27:16 We'll do this a couple of times. It'll be fun if you got Rogan from this. I'm just sitting there. I'm just you two both on Rogan. I'm like, hey, yeah, Rogan's like, I don't know who this Coleman guy is, but he keeps leaving and coming back. He seems to be fun. I, if I have to answer, why haven't you met him Rogan?
Starting point is 01:27:32 I am not smart enough, okay. Now I'm kidding, I love Rogan. So here we go right here, Coleman Hughes. What's the website? ColemanHewes.org. You know you're smart, we have an org. You've got a com like us losers. Robert Kelly.com.
Starting point is 01:27:48 Robert Kidd and Live.com. I'm Greg Stoen. website is Dan. Work under construction. Shit. Torade is from 92 on there. He's an org. Comahueus.org. And check out all this stuff.
Starting point is 01:28:00 He's a brilliant young man and very talented. And I swear to God, you will love his podcast if you check it out. And of course, but dang, one of my favorites. I think you liked my name. No, you're the biggest fan. I love you too. I mean, I really love you. I tell everybody about you. Greg Stone is, I was gonna say my cannabis amazing. I'm getting Greg Stone, one of the funniest motherfuckers. I mean, genuinely funny. There's a lot of people out there right now. He's hilarious. I love they throw hilarious around. He's a killer. No, he's not. No, she's not.
Starting point is 01:28:42 All right. This guy fucking funny funny. No, he's not. No, she's not. All right. This guy fucking funny, funny. Sitting here, talking home downstairs on a bus on a plane on a fucking donkey. Greg Stone will make you laugh and on stage. You got to check him out. He's got a podcast. What's your podcast name? Friday night Greg for the Friday night energy. Okay. Wednesday morning. Yeah, the singing thing night cream is game changing. All right. We're going to play his video and then we'll play one of your videos. I gotta talk to you. I forget about poor Coleman. These guys did
Starting point is 01:29:10 a lot of great work. You play my video. It erases you. Everything is you've seen. Because now you're just a night cream guy. Greg has a show called Night Cream. And a Jew and who? Daniel's name makes me uncomfortable. Night cream. I've had your back this whole podcast. He's a shit. It's a very sexual name as I'm a sexual band. All right, well there you go. Robert Kelly live.com, hey, I am a point pleasant this weekend with the great Joe Russell, jokes Russell.
Starting point is 01:29:38 At jokes Russell, check him out. He's right over there with a fucking dumb hat on all night. Fucking elf. And then of course I'm gonna to be at Saratoga Springs comedy works on the 11th and the 12th and then the 16th I'm at Capitol Prime, Lansing, the 17th of Park Theatre, the 18th I'll be a club guard, Boudde Baldy and in Milwaukee and then Chicago on the 19th at the Lincoln Lodge. You guys are making that mission and run.
Starting point is 01:30:09 I'll be it, laugh it up at Pekipsi. We moved that date. Sorry, the snow storm never came in, by the way. We go to cancel. Friday night I could have done Saturday night, the snow was over. I could have done both fucking nights, sold out shows on Saturday, suck my anyways. Pekipsi, we rescheduled that the fourth and the fifth. I hope you hold your tickets.
Starting point is 01:30:27 If not, please come back and come see me up there. We're going to be at the new club, I believe, over by the train station and the Irish pub where it used to be, which is a better venue. Anyways, call to cruise in Tampa. And then we got Graham Rapids. This is the 25th and 26th. This is show isth and 26th. This is show is gonna be nuts. Me, Ari Shafir, and Big J. Okasin, who I love, all of us are doing a show for shits and giggles to be together and have fun, which I'm so happy about.
Starting point is 01:30:54 That's what I love fucking Ari. He's like, let's just do a show together. He could go there and sell it out. You know what I mean? He's like, let's just go do a show together. That's fucking, I love him. So we're gonna be doing that show, it's gonna be great. And then of course, McCurdy's, I'll be back down there.
Starting point is 01:31:08 I got so many dates coming up. And Tampa, I'm filming my hour special. I have an hour that was fucking lost after my last hour because I didn't do a special. And then all this bullshit happened. And what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna be filming that in Tampa. So as soon as we get the venue, as soon as we get the date, I will let you know your job, tell everybody, sell it out.
Starting point is 01:31:30 And go to the fuck down there, go down. Come down if you even have up here, Boston, whatever, go down there, go to comicwearables.com, get yourself a nice hat. I got these hats. If you go to YKWD, not all merch, YKWD, YKWD, click on it, you little fucking nicky. Look at all that stuff. YKWD hats, we got the Skankfest, Skullpatch, done by Alex. We got all kinds of stuff up there. Hoodies, shirts, you got pancakes on day, you got not you hoodie, YKWD, baseball hat, the Robert Kelly, all the stuff. Use code word, Ladybugs, and get 20% off all of that merch,
Starting point is 01:32:07 right the fuck now. And show up at one of my shows with a merch on it, give you a big fat hug. What else do I have to do, Nicolaw? We gotta, what else? Okay, so I have to read this thing or at the end? At the end. Okay, holy shit.
Starting point is 01:32:19 All right guys, listen, we're gonna do a couple reads here. We're gonna wrap this up. I hope you guys enjoyed the show. Again, Coleman Hughes.org, because he's better than us. And we got Greg Stone. Got him. Stone.com, right?
Starting point is 01:32:35 And I get... Greg Epstone.com. Yeah, please go check these guys out. Thanks for coming on. I gotta read this. We got a brand new sponsor this show. Check this out. Fuckin' people. I want to show. Check this out, fucking people.
Starting point is 01:32:45 I want to thank my new small business, tier sponsor, Gunter Law Group. If we learned anything over the past two years, it is to be prepared. You got to be prepared. Not just in terms of food, water, toilet paper, etc, but also in terms of getting your legal house in order before it's too late.
Starting point is 01:33:03 Even if you don't have Rogan, Rogan money, that's funny. I said Rogan because I'm bald. Even if you don't have Rogan money, a will, you need a will. I gotta get one of these. I'm calling them tomorrow. I need a will. Me too. My wife literally just started talking about it.
Starting point is 01:33:20 A will that you love ones know. You have a will? No. You need a have a will? No. You need a will, motherfucker? God. My hair line is just sitting, I need a will. This is so more good. No, Ari needs a will.
Starting point is 01:33:35 Keith needs a will. Keith. Ari doesn't have a will after that whole thing. I can't get out, right? A will let your loved ones know how to distribute your estate after you die. Regardless of the size of the estate, at the very least you should consider a will, a medical power of attorney and DNR,
Starting point is 01:33:53 direct so that your loved ones don't have to decide whether or not to pull the plug on you during one of the most painful points in their life, This is crazy. No, I like my class. That's end on a real high note. At the end of the day, it is one of the most loving. Love.
Starting point is 01:34:12 Love. Loving things you can do for your love. When your mother has just had enough with life, what do you see? You. Ha, ha, ha. I'm going to win. Now you're just not even reading out loud anymore. I've been trying, listen, man, this is so serious. Look, you need one. Get needle one. Listen, I went through this shit with my stepfather,
Starting point is 01:34:28 my father Larry and it's terrible. She have a will, you gotta make sure this shit's righteous because things are righteous. I got into a bunch of bullshit over my grandma's will. Really? She had two different wills, bickering between my mom, my aunts, it's still not reasonable to say. Tell you what people say. It's not reasonable. It's not reasonable to say. It's not reasonable to say. I had gotten to a bunch of bullshit over my grandma's will. Really? She had two different wills, bickering between my mom, my aunts.
Starting point is 01:34:48 It's still not residing the same. Tell you when people die, family members go nuts. Right. Yeah, my aunts and my uncles fought over my grandma for those gallstones that were in a job. They had to divvy them up. Wow. Yeah, I want one.
Starting point is 01:35:02 I mean, what the fuck? Everyone knows when I die, my wife gets all the X-Men related action figures. And brother gets the Spider-Man related action figures. And my kid, I'll probably give him some of the advantage. You'll give you a kid everything. The question is, who gets the intellectual property rights to Nightcream?
Starting point is 01:35:16 Herumi, probably, because he's already scamming out of all of it. Well, here's the deal. This is what you should do. If you're anywhere in Texas, contact Kyle Guntler at Guntler Law Group for free 30-minute consultation to discuss your options. Go to GuntlerLawGroup.com, email Kyle directly at Kyle that's KYLA, say in that right, at GuntlerLawGroup.com.
Starting point is 01:35:42 Or just call them at 6-8-2-2-4-1967. To set up your consultation today, and if you mention YKWD, they're gonna knock 25% off of the fee. This is legal advantage, and there's not intended to be specific legal advice. Yeah, I mean, I'm gonna actually call these guys, because I need to set up a will.
Starting point is 01:36:06 So it's actually smart, especially, you know, if you got some shit and you got a kid, have a will, because it gets fucking queer when you die. Yeah, queer and the way the word queer should be used. I mean, I'm sorry. You know, yeah, odd. Can I use the word? Is it always have to have a fucking rainbow behind it
Starting point is 01:36:24 and a guy going like, oh, this one used odd. You can to have a fucking rainbow behind it and a guy go, I like, ah! I just want to use, you can't have a boss in accent and say queer normally. This is true. My accent, I can't say certain words because it is racist and no matter what I do. If you're a whale, if you're a whale, don't be a fucking queer. I know, I apologize. I don't know what I sound like. Don't be a loser.
Starting point is 01:36:45 Get yourself a will. And I want to, we got to read these names. Can you read these names? You want to let you read them? See how fast you can read them on Adderall. Mad Heck, you motherfucker. Thanks for coming. $10 jack, you piece of shit.
Starting point is 01:36:57 Thank you. Kenny Vego, you're in the business. Thanks. Tosh Devadarini, you're the one I love. Jonathan Tetral, thanks for coming. Sam Phelps, God bless. Herschel Roshstein, I love the way your body is. David Ryder, right? You to the top.
Starting point is 01:37:11 Joey Adams, the King of the World. What? Reame Hamilton, you even spayed on name wrong. That's how weird and a good guy you are. Guy Patterson, Orange Vision, IDC. I can robot on here, God bless him. Gian before bless, token black dude welcome to gang yin cd Jones suck your own dick willy madden you're related to a guy you just
Starting point is 01:37:32 died terry brookshires sounds like a guy in the mall the store you know what I mean Gustav Buffon ghoul rob no last name fuck you Aaron Jürgen sin sounds like a cream Stephen Ron burgers like a rapist football player Leandro Jahahan, some weird country. Coat and Vaughn, God bless. Mike Tor, tour my ligaments. Lawrence. And let him read the last. Oh, sorry. Did you want to polish? Polish? Paul. Paul. You like a little bit. Paul, like Paul. You're like similar to Paul. He's Paul and he's Polish. Kind of Polish. He's both. He'll stand like. Listen, I hope you guys
Starting point is 01:38:04 enjoyed the show. I had a great time. I finally got you on of polished. He's both. He'll stand like, listen, I hope you guys enjoyed the show. I had a great time. I finally got you on the show. I'm excited. I want to get you on my live from the shed. Come up to the house. Yeah, anytime. Anytime.
Starting point is 01:38:13 And you guys want to have, let's do it. How long have you known each other? Just for my own record. Just for my own record, I'd love to know how long you know each other. You're getting a shed. And five? I've done the show 40 times, 100 patrons. No one's there fucking seen the shed couldn't be the shed might as well be on Mars for me
Starting point is 01:38:31 Nah, but let's have a good time Rob needs black friends Polish Mr. Go down. Greg, thank you so much. I love you. Always the best, dude. And I would definitely have you at my house for like a barbecue. We're just a lot of other people and you're definitely not coming inside. And I want to thank of course, Nicky, Mush. I want to thank Joe and all you fans who are checking it out.
Starting point is 01:39:02 I hope you enjoyed the show. We'll be back next Tuesday. We have a fucking another live one. So we'll see you then. y todos los fans que se han chequeado, espero que te haya gustado el video, nos vemos en el próximo día, tenemos una vida más profunda, entonces, nos vemos en el día, ¿que? later Con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincindia aventuras desperan. ¡Fli-parás! Vuelades de Madrid, Amurcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros.
Starting point is 01:39:40 Volotea. Tarifa sujetas a disponibilidad. Consulta las condiciones en volotea. you

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.