Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Hopelessly Devoted to You

Episode Date: September 17, 2012

Comedy journalist Elise Czajkowshi (@elisecz) joins YKWD to defend her review of Robert's first comedy CD. Kathi Kay (@cartoontherapy) also returns. RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hoy es un día de eso de no saber cómo va a acabar el día. Donde nadie pregunta a dónde viene, sino por qué no te viene. Y una ronda es el tiempo que pasa entre no conocernos, y no creer olvidarnos. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos vía. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos encuentra. Maú, la vida es más vida cuando nos encontramos. Encuentra los bares de Madrid la dicción especial de Madrid nos liga. Un dominaje de Maú, a Madrid. Encuentran los bares de Madrid la decia especial de Madrid nos lida. Un número más que de mao.

A Madrid. Buscas contenido gratis. Pluto TV es el servicio de streaming gratuito con series como South Park o sensación de vivir. Descarga ya la aplicación en todos tus dispositivos. Pluto TV, ven a verlo sin pagar nunca! September 20th through the 23rd. So go see Bobby Kelly Live and listen to the, you know what did podcast on riotcast.com. Hey gang, this is Colin Quinn.

This is Jim Norton, this is Dennis Leroy. This is Opie from a lot of things. This is Bert Kreiser. Staying cooking, you are listening to Robert Kelly's, you know what dude? You know what dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude?

You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude?

You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude?

You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? You Know What Dude? I'm gonna be ready. I'm gonna be ready. I'm gonna be ready. I'm gonna be ready. I'm gonna be ready. I'm gonna be ready. I'm gonna be ready. I'm gonna be ready. I'm gonna be ready.

All right, man. You see the hat. Oh. Yeah, that's awesome. I saw that when I walked in. That's not good carried away. I like it. I like it. I like something. No, he's not. No, it's good. Over enthusiastic Dan. Well, here's a here's the deal is that I got to you, me and Callie. He drew us. Joe, the picture. I can't wait to see my mom, galore. It has. I have him out. Yeah, you, you're so easy to draw first of all. I have a fucking, you know, know and you know in carnivals where they do those overly large head cartoonish thing That's a real life caricature. Thank you

Joe's a read a red man Red a Native American we have He's taking the bandana the bomb danna the bomb danna the bomb danna is on on He's taking the bandana the bomb Dana the bomb Dana the bomb Dana is on on on your on what's your name again? I forgot your name. It's all right. It's damn damn soda Dan most of us soda is back in a seat back face to face with me as you used to be I love that beautiful put them and you're back. Welcome back. Deboy. Yeah, it's good to be back I'm listening to the podcast like a jealous girlfriend. Really. Yeah, it's good to be back. I've been listening to the podcast like a jealous girlfriend. Really? Yeah.

It's been good. It's been really good. Yeah, it's been not better, not worse, but good. I believe it's called addition by subtraction. Ha ha ha. But we miss you, man. We'll glad you're back. We'll have to be back.

And we have, of course, Kelly Fistuka, aka Fat Kelly. Yeah. It just love pausing on that. AKA Fat. But you love pausing on that. A K.A. But you're not really fat anymore, so. The new drawing that a fan made of Kelly is just hilarious. The mates and chases one. That's so good.

The new one. You see the new one? No. Show them the new one, Cal. Let me get this kid's name up. Do you have this kid's name? You know what? This is going to take 20 minutes.

I got it. I got it. Shut up. Can you name the Kelly Awful Haircut for Stupa. Did you hear that podcast? We didn't even talk about that on the mic. We. They kicked you. She got a haircut.

She got a haircut. I think she was mugged. My favorite line. The history of the podcast is Bobby said, you will hear your haircut with a candle. Hey, and I, I love that. I love it. She's much.

That was Kevin Bila. Here's the thing is that I've never, I didn't notice it. I noticed the hair when she walked in, but I didn't notice it. Just like I don't notice my wife when her hair looks great. I don't notice what it looks like.

Shit either. So it kind of goes both ways. Was it Joe Liss probably? It looks like she got beat by Brutus beef cake. In a match, he took a chunk of hair. Wow, that was worthy. You need some time back. I have really been rusty.

I think it looks nice now. You weren't here though. Yeah, it looks good. It looks good now. It's back. It's back to cute Kelly. Yeah, she gave me a fucking Danny Bonadoochie bag. It was just fucking silly.

But anyways, we got Joe List in the house. Hello. Hi, Joe. How are you? I'm good. I'm great. I'm always happy to the house. Hello. Hi Joe. How are you? I'm good. I'm great. I'm always happy to be here. It's very enjoyable. I'm good at Dan's back Yeah, it's a good time, right? Well, it looks amazing. Yeah, she does look amazing. I made her wear that. I made her change She actually came in with a lot more clothes and I said no go put this on lose it I'm kidding water. You really do You really do dress sexy for the podcast.

You know that. She got the tata, man. That's the Bobby Flair. Bobby what? She. Those are tights. Those are fishnets. Yeah.

Fishnets. And we got Kathy, aka the fucking conunt. Curry. Kathy, Kathy with an eye. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter.

I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter.

I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a punter. I'm a pun up. I was gonna say sack a lot of wits

Well, you know me I can't say fucking rent when we thank people donations it takes 20 minutes, but yeah, she People you guys know Kathy. She went on a day everybody knows Kathy He was a podcast you don't know Kathy is go back and listen to the best episode ever Yeah, let's call best episode ever. She went on a date with Joe Rosa I think daily roses. And yeah, and it didn't go too well. But God, the laughs that came out of that, they came out of my belly.

And then you went on a date with her. Yeah, then Kathy and I went on a date. And neutral Dan prevailed. Congressman Dan. We'll go for pizza, whatever you like. America, you all pay the bill. I see, I'm still rusty. And you let her just talk.

That was your, that was your ammo. Yeah, gas out. Yeah. That's what I do with my mom. There's a little gas out and then I take my shots with the end of the round just to get on the cards. Did you try to get some? Yeah.

You did. Shot down. Really? Yeah. Everybody kept trying. I mean, I got, how did he try? Oh, you know, down really yeah, everybody kept trying. I mean I got how did he try? Oh, you know, we were walking through what is that area that we're walking through To her city

And I think he was like oh look at that nice view it was like that kind of a thing Oh, you pulled like a fucking grease one move Sandy look at the ocean Sandy we're at the drive-in let me y'all on a grab your tit She's got the dumb accent too That was joe list I like credit for that voice, but it was yeah, I liked it. He took credit Best of ever so much pretty listening blown away

Voice of an angel was that that was pretty good So yeah, you were on the show and you so you tried to get a little bit you and you got shut down Yeah, she's the odd for you to get shut down when we respond to you. I get shut down a lot really yeah, you do When will respond to you? I get shut down a lot. Really? Yeah, you do? I don't like your fucking canine spray. I give it my voice. Oh, I lost my voice. We're just the last yellow Hopefully I never turns up and all right, so anyways, Kathy we have have Elise. Elise is here. She actually, the reason why I didn't really put it out there either. This is kind of weird.

I look, someone once told me, run to controversy, not away from it. You understand? When something happens that you're like, what the fuck is that? Don't hide, don't, you know, just go to it and fucking talk to it and let's see what happens. So, dancin' this was mouth-knif, whatever's name is. Dancin' that's all, what's his name?

From stand-up records? Where's, where's, where's, stand-up records? I don't even know where my senior here. All right, here's a deal. I have a deal with Comedy Center records. I presented them years, you know, whenever, a few years ago, you want my first CD, they were like, no, Jack Vaughn literally said, no.

And I went, are you sure? And he went, absolutely, I don't want it. You can keep that. Okay, whatever, because my first CD, Robert Kelly Live, I produced myself at the Houston Lafstop, that's no longer there anymore. It was just, you know just one of those fucking road clubs that would headline a guy like me

when I was really kind of a really powerful middleer, you know what I mean? And I just started handling, they would let me go there and they would record my set. I recorded it myself, all the seven shows and I put it together myself and I paid for everything myself and I kinda had something to sell at these shows.

I remember like, that's when I had like the eight fans, they're called them the original, the Fat 8, because it was just Fat. What year was it? This was 10, it was a 10, 2003. 2003, so it was almost 10 years ago. Okay, when I was, what fat were you in? Um.

What? What? Second? Might have been third fat. Or were you in um second might have been third fat or were you a second second second skinny I was just imagining her looking at the album cover and walking and be like who the fuck is this guy well here's the thing is that I had hair and a goatee and I was actually good looking I was I was I was actually good looking back then I wasn't in my fat because I think I was better without hair oh wow that just fucking made me thump in my pants. You said that again?

No, I mean, I didn't like it. Just don't wear any tights if you walk in here. No, what? What? You fucking, you ain't wearing me like five minutes ago. You sent me that. No, no, no, no, don't give it, because here's the thing. She's taking something we said off hair.

Oh, yeah. That I didn't, I was saying to her off hair thing she's taking something we said off air. Oh, yeah, that I didn't I was saying to her Off air and she's bringing up on air But if they fucking actually listen to the show Yeah, they would know your possession with girls and tits Well, yeah, absolutely, but here's the thing is if they actually were here when we talked about it Which they weren't they would laugh but they weren't so you know, I give it to her just because she doesn't fucking have I actually I reached for my own mic to grab the bandana. I just got excited about your long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long released by myself and, you know, it's just, I went on to move on with

Comedy Center Records with my new hour and they wanted nothing to do it. This thing was just sitting there. We used to give it away for free to Donators, whoever donated to the podcast we'd send them, we'd send them my city. Because here's a deal. Testor loyalty. Every once in a while. It's a weird thing because that beginning part of my life those fans are still around

But they're they're older now. Yeah, you know, they went from college kids to married people You know with kids themselves. That's that's 10 years ago But I'd always get this 80 where's that CD? Where's that do you have that? And I had, I think a box of them that I just never sold. So I'd mail them out whatever. And this guy, Dan from Standard Records, is bugging me and bugging me for years, dude. Can I have that, can I have that, can I, like it was something special?

Just going the lost tapes? Well, yeah, he kept, he kept going, I'd love to take that, I'd love to just have that. And I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let me talk to Jack, and I finally talked to Jack, you know, this year or whatever. And I was like, dude, do you want this at all? In the future, for something else, maybe we just give it on the next CD. And he's like, no.

It's like, it's like, it's like, it's like. It's like free. It's like dude, take it. I don't know. No. All right, so I go to Dan, dude, you can have it. But look, I have a record deal with Comedy Central, okay? This can't fuck with. You can't, I can't be promoting, hey, I'm over here at this record label.

Yeah. I'm over here with this fucking record label. Let's, you can have it, but no no hurrah, no fucking swimfam, no fucking parade, no fucking... Bubbly boo. Bubbly boo. So whatever, he takes it and it takes a long time. He wants the original art and we gotta go,

it was a fucking nightmare for me. I got all the shit going on with the pilot and fucking road gigs and I suck at memory and he wants a photo from 10 years ago that I got to go find out a fucking server, you know, and he wants all the shit and I mean, he's a sweet guy. He really is. He's a sweet person, but it's just like, fuck me. Why did I do this? This was dead, over gone, move on. Let's get the new one out. Never look the fuck back So he releases this fucking thing and then want to get up and I'm on Twitter and I and I see review of Robert Kelly and I'm like Whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa no no I already went through this with this fucking thing back when when you're supposed to go through or CD release

Yeah, and I read the fucking review and it's oh my Jesus did you read it Kalei Kathy what did you what what you give one word I need two words like two words go ahead or like three words like I really fucking bad she's still Dan to shut up really fucking bad of the review. Really fucking bad. She's still damned to shut up. Really fucking bad. Yeah, I know. Really, the review, the CD is bad. Right, I've never listened to the CD, but the review is really bad. Right.

Ooh, like. That's why I like Alicia. I lost. That's what I said. You said Alicia. I said Alicia. Yes, Alicia. I said Alicia.

I said Alicia. I'll rewind the show. I'll stop this fucking show. You stop the show. You said a shlish. Yeah, do it. God, what'd you say? Walk softly and carries a big stick. Well, here rewind the show. I'll stop this fucking show. Stop the show. You said a slush. Yeah, do it. Go ahead. Walk softly and carries a big stick.

Well, here's the deal. This is not only this review. Here, and two reviews came out, which is one was good. But this one, you really did your job. But here's the thing too, is that this was your first assignment for this for stand what spit take. Where are they based out of?

Julie was in LA, but I. Julie. Julie. So. Yeah. She's actually a friend of mine. Yeah, I know. I love her.

I really do. She's one of my favorite people. She's a first of all, she's really into comedy. Always has been. She's really is one of those people that, you know, really is the, I mean, if there's any type of internet news or something news about comedy, she's one of the people that is kept it going. She's one of the founders of those people because she was in New York, moved out Las Vegas. Now she's in LA, I guess.

Thanks, I love her. She's great. She's a little quirky too. It's a little kind of, you know, just her personality is a little quirky, which I like, you know what I mean? And she's cute, she's really cute girl. I had a little mini crush on her too.

Yeah, but yeah, whatever. Hey, you're right. Before, not before I was married, because my wife listened to this who the fact you want a bang Talking about Bobby So anyways, this is your first assignment. Yes, okay, so I read this and immediately I'm gonna be honest Because I always am because that's my fucking name that's what you know for right, but that's what they call me right? fucking name. That's what you're known for. Right? But that's what they call me, right? You're not necessarily the truth, but you're body honest. Yeah. That's what Joe and I call

you behind the back. Why am I doing this? I don't know. Yeah, it's a weird body language. Yeah. I think I'm cold. My tits are cold. Let me turn this off. I think that's why I was known it because my tits are cold. I know it was kind of comfortable because I'm resting on my stomach. It's almost like a bench. I'm sitting on the green monster at Fenway Park and I'm leaning on a bar. To be honest, it was fucking like, I was like, this fucking Dan, fuck cock suck, fuck, and then I'm reading it. And here's the thing with it. I really, she was, you kind of, I mean, you're right. A lot of it. Don't yell. Your voice cracks when you yell. No, no, yell. You're crazy. No, you're actually. No, you're right. I get next. Absolutely. A lot of it, I mean, a lot of it, if

you, look, it's right, there's a lot of it where you like, holy shit. Okay. I couldn't, I have to agree with some of this shit that you're saying. But the only, and look, it's right, there's a lot of it where you like holy shit, okay. I couldn't, I have to agree with some of this shit that you're saying, but the own, and I mean, you really did your fucking job. The other one, the other review, well, to have you read the other view, you're right. It was, she's like, no, I was done with the album after. I'm not gonna go fishing for it.

But it was a weird for you to get, like I'm gonna read a review. My first thing is something from 10 years ago Didn't I my I think my biggest point was that it was a weird thing to do to bring it out now Right like why it doesn't really right didn't need to be really who asked you to reveal it They sent it stand-up records sent us a press release and said here Do you want to download this and review it press release recent? Yeah, well, I mean it wasn't a full press release No, 10 years ago just got backed up

Email Julie and said this we think this is something that everyone who's a Robert Kelly fan should listen to so we're reissuing it Oh, here's a download and like 40 pictures of you and He said 40 pictures of you and 40 pictures. He said all the pictures you said Just a fucking what are they all with the old bitches of me? I don't know they're they're Chronicle from all your fats to skinny's the fat. It's like when they do that thing with meth heads This is a method. This is her three years late. I think Todd was a rose in when they get you know What's so

That's my space that's my space that was my that was my that was my sufi after tourgasm I I just After tourgasm, I just was sort of flaring. Like a fucking hippie? A potion. A potion. I'll tell you why. I did it. I did rose.

I was on my space and I wanted to see a potorose in my mouth. I muster bet to making a potion. A potion. A potion. I wanted to put, I wanted to see something if people would do. You know what I mean how what like after tour guys I'm what type of thing I put a flower on my mouth and if you looked there was a thousands of people with flowers in the

Mals and I put them in my top 10 my top 10 a top 20 everybody in my top 20 had flowers in their mouths like thousands of people started just doing this So but that photo is fucking old. That's when I had hair. I think I had hair. So they gave me this fucking thing, and then you listened to it. How many times? Start to finish twice, maybe, and then certain tracks over and over again.

So probably three times in total. Right. I didn't have a lot of time. Now, are you a stand up? No, no, journalist. You're a journalist. Yeah. How long have you been doing comedy?

Like, how long have you been writing comedy? Yeah, writing about comedy. About a year? A year. Where were you before? I write, I'm freelance. I write, she's like murderous. She's like murderous.

I went from murderous and rapes to comedy, a little. Yeah. I was traveling and I wrote about other things, but I've been writing about comedy for a year. For a year. And I mean, was it, I mean, this is a fucking, I mean, you really... The length is just what the site requires.

That's the one thing I remember. I've never gone that long. It had been up to me. But if it opened up to you. Her review would have been too hard. It stinks. It stinks. It's so much. It's shit.

Can I have some at four words, please? Thank God we don't have time machines. Yeah, yeah. This really is time capsule comedy. Let's open up the time capsule. Now here's the thing is, yeah, go ahead. Please tweet at me if you just got that spinal tap reference that I threw out there. Remember that's the best part.

Yeah, the review of this final step. Shark sandwich. This review is nearly two words long. Shit sandwich. You can't say that. Yeah, it's just funny that you stopped the show. He's tweeted me. He's doing the reference.

Yeah, you're doing this new thing. No, pause it and email me. Joe list. That was Joe list. Yeah, that's the final half. Let's get back to the review. Come on. That's what I'm saying. There's like this new thing that you do. What do I mean? I didn't do that before. You've done it twice on the

issue. You don't want to do it twice. You did the before you're like, that's Joe list. Can we give you a little bit of a deal that my voice is? You what? Well, when you sing like that, you want people to make sure you know. I mean, some of my thought it was soda. He's gonna svelvy the voice. But no one is gonna mistake your voice you what what when you sing like that you want people to make sure you know i mean some of my thought it was so to use this velvety voice but no one is going to mistake your voice was that is a waste of let's hear you do hopelessly devoted to you

come on come on hopelessly devoted hopelessly devoted to you sure hope no one mistakes my voice hopelessly devoted you really do have a fucking spot I'm sure no one mistakes my boy You really do have a fucking smile? Look at me. I'm sandwiched. All right. All right. So anyway, so Spinaltip so yeah, I mean so this you it would have been shorter, but I was 11 This is what fucking blew me away. It was 11 per grass of

This is what fucking blew me away. It was 11 per grass of... Jesus. Of, of, it was like, I get it. It was fucking a beret. And it's like, I want, listen, this is what I want. I want you to go. I want to get Louis CK 10 years ago and it's fucking dolphin joke.

Eee, eee, eee, eee. What's that? That was a joke for dolphins, really? But, I'm not comparing, it would still be better than mine. I want you. I don't I don't know if people actually do that. I want to get a seek album 10 years ago. No, it's still better. But it was it's fucking weird. How do you I mean, now this is the thing too, is that you're you're not a comic. So you're reviewing comedy. And comedy is so personal.

It's such a personal thing. It's subjective So like what she might not like someone else isn't didn't I just say that with personal? Well, you said personal and I don't know what that mean personal sounds like you're Because what she said is same. It's a dumb away. I'm saying I'm catering to my podcast and you're trying to get on mock marons That was a very maran line So yeah, Lisa had you said when you read that Dude, what I just fucking I was to do not me now. Yeah, I mean, I'm sad all the time But wait a minute, what about me mark?

I don't know so one of the two is gonna be like oh they're shit knowing what the fuck like now. Yeah, we are I Want to twist and they got a shit on what the fuck like no, yeah, we are Give a shit. I love mark. I can shit on what the fuck Anyways, so I mean I And this is your first fucking review and it's not I mean, I think it's kind of weird that they threw that at you too It was I think out last minute and they needed somebody and so I jumped in you know should have wrote it Who Julie okay? That's you should have wrote it. Julie. Okay. That's what you should have wrote it because see, they threw it at you at your first one and you, you, you don't know me.

You don't know me, right? No, you are. But you don't know me. Not personally. Right. You did, you said nice stuff about my other CD. Yeah. But did you, now, let me be honest, did you say that just, just to have something nice in

there? No. So it wasn't all dark and do me. No, I mean, it was just a comparison to say that there, I mean, I was trying not to review the newer one, but just reference it in there. So yeah, it's something balanced. Well, here's the thing is, like people, like there was one person.

I didn't retweet it really. I did one thing as a joke, just, you know, let you know that I saw it, but I'm not like, fuck you, I was joking, you know what I mean? But I didn't want people just, you know, let you know that I saw it, but I'm not like fuck you. I was joking, you know what I mean? But I didn't want people to, you know, because sometimes you can say, hey, what the fuck? And then everybody goes after you, because you fucking wrote it and blah, blah, blah. And it's like, look, it's a fair review of the CD. It's 10 years ago.

But it still was like, wow, man, this is reviewing like art, especially comedy. Like is fucking subjective because if we took a Paul in this room, if you let people listen to that, they'll be people that will be like, dude, it's fucking hilarious. And then, yeah, go ahead. You could say that about any form of art. You could say that about every movie, every CD that's ever come out, but you still have people criticize or critique them so there's a you know so there's people are looking at them objectively and trying to you know cocktail

got panned and it might be the best movie I've ever seen yeah cocktail with Tom Cruz right around did you really like that movie I love that movie you're liar okay you're alive I was seven when it came out. Oh, that was Joe Liss, who said that. Joe Liss, treat up me if you love cocktail. If you love the movie cocktail. And also throw a bit of an ad to me if, yeah, just get it. It's a male, just a bunch of bands.

Yeah, but it was, it was, yeah, and then I read that other review and it was like, oh my God, I'm like this fucking guy actually liked it. Like what the fuck? And the thing the other thing that bugged me is that it's, I don't wanna fucking live this again. I don't want this out there. I don't want my fucking past.

Yeah, right. You know what I mean? It's like, and it's like, you know what, I don't wanna look, if I look back five years ago, I'd be like, fuck me. You know what I mean? When I look back at my last CD, and I look at five years ago, I'd be like, fuck me. You know what I mean? When I look back at my last CD, and I look at some of the stuff,

it's like I was talking to Rogan about this one night. It's like some comics write jokes, you know, set up punch tag, and you know, it's a fucking joke. It's the formula. It's just a formula. It's here's a great set up, here's a punch, here's a tag, and we're moving the fuck on. It's an hour of that shit.

Like guys like me, or a burr, or even like Rogan, or, you know, it's kind of like these subjects, or like a chunk of material, I would say. And you work on it, and it gets bigger, it gets smaller, it gets tighter, it and it gets bigger it gets smaller It gets tighter and then it gets bigger and then it gets better and it's always evolving into something It's like this joke might be this now like this jokes that were on my last CD that I wish I didn't put on there because now It's this bigger. Oh my god fucking polished. It took me four years to make that joke to what it should be. You know what I mean?

But I did it in two years. I let it go. And it sucks, because it's never, some of my jokes are never gonna be done. It's always gonna be evolving. And, you know, even the stuff I have now, like putting up my next album, it's like, I'm gonna cross between the last album, I have jokes from like the last album,

that type of material, and this new thing that I'm kind of on. And it's like, you know, when I do a CD, it's like gonna be this fucking weird. It's not gonna be all consistent. It's gonna be this weird fucking evolution. You're gonna see, you know, and I think you see in that next city, the evolution from the first album to the next album, there's, it's tighter, it's more polished. It's a little more honest, it's a little more my life.

It's not so fucking guy, you know, orientated, but it was still fucking hard to look at something like that when that comes up in your face Especially I don't even know you and it's like then who who what what did I do Joe's on fire Joeless comedy on If you like that joke, you like that joke, please She was just doing her job though. I don't know you really

Who's saying Wow, so what was what was she doing? We've got a critique of you. Why don't you queue up that five minutes? We play a couple of She really is she's looking for new co-tails I'm not gonna be a comic. Can I write for Spadek? Oh, I'm gonna speak out. I know Spadek's. No, I know she was doing a job. Yeah, and it's just like, what's playing? Well, no. Cause you asked her, what, yeah. What I asked her.

Seems to me that Kelly doesn't think Bobby's funny. That's what I took. I want to get a due take away though. That's what I took. No, I think this is really cool that she came in to talk to you. Like, yeah. Like, because I power her. Like, yeah.

I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, yeah, I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, yeah, I'm like, yeah, yeah, I'm like I want to get this to do. Take away that. That's what I talk about. No, I think this is really cool that she came in to talk to you. Yeah. Like, because if I were her, I'd be fucking shit in my pants. Why? Well, I shit my pants and I know you. Yeah, but I'm not talking to you. She's not some and rusty.

It's a time. No, but you know what I mean? Like, it's not like, I'm not there with you. It's a fucking podcast. It's a shitty fight. I know. It's 10 years ago. If this was my new album, I know it's 10 years ago.

If this was my new album, I'd fucking cut your head off. Listen, I'd shave your eyebrows. No, I'm kidding. You better give me a fucking good one. No, no. The reason why she's here is because I asked her to be here. So fucking thank me, not her. First of all, and second of all,

I understand she's doing a job. Apps are fucking lootly. I just wanted, I wanted you on because, number one, I wanted to fucking, I, it's like, I want to understand what the fuck it was. What's going, like, why was this reviewed? Why the fuck would somebody do this? And it must be hard for you to know

that you're gonna get fucking shit when you're honest, when you're writing something about somebody's creativity. That must be a hard thing to go fuck, or maybe it's not. Maybe, look, I think it would be hard for you to do. If it's not, there's something wrong with you psychologically.

You're a fucking twisty. If you can write that thing about somebody and not have like, fuck, I'm being honest, but fuck. This is what I have to do. This is what I do, right? And everything I write on the internet, I know every comic that I mentioned is a Google alert on their name,

and they're gonna see it. I don't. Many, many do. All right, do it really? Yeah, I didn't know that. Do you guys not? I don't know. I would have to look at you a couple of times.

Wait a minute, do you, do you, do the famous people do that? Do we have to do the, I don't know, I'm so far behind. I'm so far behind. And then, I just figured I had a telecomputer. I think most of them do we have to do that? Yeah, I'm so far behind And then it's figured I had a tinnok computer on it I think most of them do I just don't Yeah, right Lucky you're blocking me on everything

You're right going with anything Yeah, welcome back Dan I was on your side, do you took Elise's side? Yeah, yeah Lying then the sand has been drawn No, I'm the devil's advocate You're not an advocate? I like Elise because she's just like a fucking stone cold killer.

She's like, yeah, that's what I thought about the island. I like, I like it. This is why I, this is why I first, at first read, I was like, fuck Dan Schnitzel-Snassel. Because I was mad because I was like, I didn't want this out there. I didn't, I didn't, but then that's what it's actually. I was gonna do it, but then it actually interest me the actual actual because I agreed with it. I agreed

with what you were saying. I didn't not agree. I was like, that's not fucking true. Like I couldn't, I'm not going to defend that album. You know what I mean? That's my fucking first album. That's my first 15 years. It got me to where I am now. I know what that album is. I'm confident. I'm not going gonna fucking bash those jokes either i'm not gonna see it or go fuck spiss the pants monster that fucking joke of yeah of course about the saw us was saw us on there was it no i think that well let's cue that up if that's good if we had that she'd fucking leave she probably she probably throw the mic at me No my last line was just that I didn't think it deserved to be brought out again

So I think in that way we're on the same page. Yeah, no absolutely. There was a lot of stuff in here Where we were on the same page absolutely I I Because you wrote this Legitimately reviewing this thing you didn't write this from fuck Bob Kelly and you could tell it wasn't a fucking Cuz there's more there's women in the room usually it's all men and she's trying to pretend she's trying to fit in So she's gonna get now there's women in the room and she's fucking acting a little Who else have you know what the legs cross before have you She's just trying to fit in so she's like, now there's women in the room and she's fucking acting a little. What, girlfriend? A-ha, girlfriend? Who else have you-

I'm so ignorant to legs cross before. Have you? I don't know. I don't know. It's because all the other girls are crossing their legs. And I can't cross my legs, or I would too. I briefly had mine crossed. It felt good.

You do. Look what they're doing. Have you ever gotten shit from somebody? Have you ever gotten attacked for reviewing some type of comedy?? I'm names not yet I'm sure it'll happen at some point, but I haven't it hasn't been an issue yet Really what what else have you reviewed? I write for this website called split-sider Yeah, I review comedy documentaries a lot, but I don't know how many people read it

So I haven't gotten any bad feedback. Well that made me feel good too when I looked at other people follow you Oh, yeah, nobody that was like I'm fine No, I'm kidding no, but they should here's a thing. Is that it? Refalls in the force. No, yeah, it's still like noise. Here's the thing is that Comedy is subjective comedy. You can't you can't sit here You can if you read the review she makes valid points As far as stand-up comedy goes as far far as jokes go, where I was in my career, apps are fucking lootly.

But that doesn't mean it's not funny. That doesn't mean people aren't gonna laugh. If you're talking about a CD, if I released it today, that look, if you're a fan of mine, you'll like this album for the shits and giggles factor to hear the progression like when I listen when when I watch Richard Price up and smoke or still smoking his first He's at the improv the originally improv in New York City And he's got little notes and he's smoking and it's a like a one or two camera shoot It's his first one back and he's talking about sucking a dick

He's been addicted to his bombing. Yeah, he's bombing and people with it like what the fuck what the fuck but that got him to where he was yeah do you know what I mean so this album pissed the pants monster I learned that was when I used to fucking go from here to here with just energy I would come off sweating 10 minutes set downstairs. I'd be sweating because I would always just, we'll scam for a good night and put my hand up. You know, and you know, as I got older and as I got, you know, better, I learned how to, I can't do that for one thing physically. I just can't like my self a steam won't allow me to flip out the whole, like have that energy anymore,

because I feel like shit. And physically I'm too fat to sweat. The whole time. I had to become a better comic. That's what I said, Tourism made me a better comic because I broke my knee and I had to tell jokes because I couldn't run or want.

So I had to become a better standup. But so yeah, it's a, it's a, but you're, I mean, this, this, that type of thing when you're, now do you, do you, like if you like a guy, like personally, who's your favorite comic? A favorite comic. Yeah, like, yeah.

I like John Mulaney. John Mulaney, I love. I like John Mulaney, a lot, very funny guy. I love Mulaney. He's got a great fucking, people think he's gay. Yeah, yeah. He's so good. Yeah, you know John Mulaney? Yeah, he's very funny.

Yeah. But that's a different type of guy than me. Do you like guys who do you like Bill Burr? Yes, Jim Norton? Yeah, totally. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

And she's like, I love Joe DeRosa. Do you know Joe DeRosa? I know him, yeah. It's risk-taking. It's just like I love Joe D'Arosa. Do you know Joe D'Arosa? I know him. Yeah, it's it's risk taking It's just barrier breaking. Can you please review his last city? Please I will I will pay you I will pay you $300 to review it Listen to your making it. Listen to me takeer. Honestly, I want one of these reviews Listen to me take her honestly. I want one of these reviews and then do joyless but make great list better than gy-derises and we can have a five. That was Kelly Fistica. So have you has anybody said anything about the review to you? About your review? No. Yeah, nobody. You go to bed. Sorry. Good or bad. Nobody. Really?

Just you. Nobody. Nobody commented on like. Sorry. Good or bad, nobody. Really? Just you. Nobody commented on like, because it was well written. Thank you. I mean, it's just. The sentence structure was excellent. I mean, it was.

Nobody used your AP style book. This was very good. Well, but I know it was good. If you like that journalist reference, that's at Dan Soder. Okay. Yeah. It was playing off the thing that I was doing. Yeah, I know we used to get in the middle of the room.

I'm going to put it in the middle of the room. I'm going to put it in the middle of the room. I'm going to put it in the middle of the room. I'm going to put it in the middle of the room. I'm going to put itervin Comedy Festival this weekend. See, yeah, that's great. I love Eugene too. So you're gonna have to write a review on that. And the whole thing will be the same like this review of your album. Mine did not deserve 11 paragraphs.

I'm gonna talk to Julie. Yeah, I talked to Julie. That should be, you should have called her and go, look. I listened to half of this. I think I got it. If it wasn't my first, I might have made an argument for some standard words. Did it make you, did it, do you really bummed out after you listened to it? No.

Did you laugh at all? I'm going to go back to college. So you said you laughed a couple times? Yeah, of course. Like what? I said in the review, I liked the Osama bin Laden bit. You know, you know, who's bit, you know, his favorite, that's who's to do that was on SNL. The where's blah, blah, blah, blah. Darryl Hammond, that's his favorite joke. Of all time? He's, yeah, he's like, dude, that's one of my favorite jokes of all time. He loves that joke. You said you recorded this over seven nights? Seven shows.

Seven shows. It's really weirdly edited. There's like 36 minute long tracks rather than like big chunks. I think that was something I did. Because it jumped right on the floor. Oh yeah, it was me. I added that shit on a fucking like a square Mac. Like the rear. I don't know I was I added that shit at my house because that that changes it like that changes the

flow of a set if you're editing it like so often well here's the thing it's that that was just I think we found the problem now no it was part of it I think that when I worked at HBO we would never take in tapes that were edited or caught because there's no way you could judge a comedian that way. So she's right. That wasn't a good representation of you in your comedy. She saw your whole set like through.

You can't watch that. She was on the money. Oh, her review is great. It was a great review. Absolutely. I don't think that I know the CD. I mean, there was what did you like to piss the pants to monster joke? Not really.

Why, tell me why? Because it didn't feel like it felt like it came out of nowhere every once in a while But it didn't wasn't enough of a running joke to work like let let explain that you mentioned it You you set up the bit and then you used it like twice afterwards as like a tag But it didn't but I don't know if it was because it was different shows like it didn't feel like it became this running bit that Everyone was into it was just like oh, I kind of what are you and then you're on something else right so it was I gotta listen to it that doesn't make sense so it's so it's this is great gonna stand out great this is though that if if if the fact that that CD I was I killed seven shows at a comedy club with that CD That week to perform you know what I mean and

When I made that I sold quite a few copies of that thing, but that thing You know that album at the time I was the funniest motherfucker on the planet in my own head and there was people that thought the same fucking thing But now looking back on that, it's like holy shit. Look, like I said before, I'll defend my jokes. I'll defend Pista Pants Mauser. I'll defend my origins. You know what I mean?

My first jokes is, are they funny? Do they have funny? Absolutely. It's just a funny sentence to be like, I will defend Pista Pants Mauser. I think, look, I think you have to as a comic you can't just throw you can't say fuck that you cuz I be I'd be lying because I did believe in them back then I did think they were funny and I mean I could do them now if I remembered them and I

would still get laughs do you know what I mean yeah because they're part of my personality but I think that that's what kind of got them over too I always said I would still get laughs. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, because they're part of my personality But I think that that's what kind of got them over too. I always said and Back then you had to see me live which I don't think is a great thing for some comics There's some comics that if you see them on television It's not as good. There's something missing from them. I think all comedy is better live. I don't. What? I think some comics are less funny live. I think some guys are fucking brilliant on TV.

Brilliant. Because the timing of a setup, punch tag, and the rhythm on TV, and the angles, and the face, and they get to edit it, it's just like, man, to watch it for an hour, I'll fucking cut my wrists. But don't you think in the room to be in that energy is always better? No, do you see, I look, are you see, I'm sorry, what are you gonna say, Cass?

No, I was gonna say with you too, what I always thought about you is that you can't get five minutes or seven minutes of you and get who you are. That was never the right way to present you, right? Even with HBO. You need 45 minutes of you. Like some comments you can take seven minutes set and you, you get them, but for you, you're so much better half hour or 45 minutes. Like little clips of you.

Yeah, I believe that's not you. You don't get more. There's guys that those guys get that can do, you know, those seven minutes sets, a four minutes sets for let them in and you're like, oh my god, you go see him live. And you be, it's like not, I can't, seven minutes to him is awesome. 50 minutes, I'll fucking kill myself. I can't do it because I can only suspend reality

or listen to the, ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba ba. For so long where it's like something else. When you see like dice live, I don't give a fuck who you are. If you don't think it's funny, there's something wrong with you. Because live, it's this fucking animal that exists. It's a fucking organism that's living. That you're like, what the fuck? You don't know what's gonna happen.

Where he's gonna go, what he's gonna say? You know, that I don't think you'll capture on a CD, audio wise, if that makes sense. But I think we might be talking about two different things in a way. Like, I'm saying, like this guy is like, I would think a grade on a short set and I would never want to watch you 45 minutes.

But you're just creating TV with seven minutes. Right, like seven minutes. Time's tough, Jackie stop jacket but i mean even if they're doing the seven minutes it's seeing it live is better than seeing on letterman do i know i don't you're arguing that you're saying five minutes this guy's that you like for five minutes but you would want to see them for forty five minutes yeah i'm saying them doing the five minutes watching it live is better than watching it

on television i know i think i think so i think some guys are better on television than other guys do you know i think jokriders or joke guys the monologue type of comic i think is it just what it lends itself better to television sets a story teller guy or you know like any Murphy couldn't do letterman could never just go on letterman and do a five four minutes set uh... castles

fund still hold well yeah but i'm dina say like it's it's i'm not saying compare myself to uh... any murphy by the way but i'm just saying that the certain guys that can't bill hicks sock on letterman what was it it's just what it was a good it was he wasn't he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he was he this joke's ever heard, which was the goodbye juice bit. You guys ever hear that bit? About she knows list. All right, okay, I'm cheese sent.

I don't know, he did it on Conan and it was short and I was like, ah, it was, like, it was, it was still got a laugh when he was talking to Conan but as a joke whole, watching it, long stage like 15, 20 minutes, how long that joke went, what were one of the best jokes ever heard? Well, here's the deal too, if you like, Dan Cook is a man, he's fucking great at doing the couch,

but I've never really seen him doing four minutes. I don't know how that would go. But if some guys can take their act and swim it over to a couch, almost like a radio show, when you do radio, you gotta kind of take that and conversationalize it. I think that's where I would feel way more comfortable doing that than I would just going, so fucking. Well, that's the God I would I would feel way more comfortable than that than I would just going so fucking

Well, that's the aspect you were talking about where it's like personality too. It's like your personality on the couch Where it seems like hey, this is who I am as a person yeah, and some guys you're right They translate like CK's amazing on the couch bur when he was on foul and was great on the couch Yeah, there was a point where it was like oh shit Oh Then he pulled that fucker right up. Yeah, there was a point where it was like oh shit. Oh, oh God Then he pulled that fucker right up. Yeah, but yeah, it's but you see the same way but you're supposed to On fucking fouling. Yeah, but here's the thing it you same shit like oh shit Oh, okay, yeah, oh god damn it when he did that thing about the chicken the audience I lost my shit

Yeah, but it was like yeah, you're right. I think personality-driven comedians maybe do better on the couch as opposed to joke writers who just kill in a five minute set. That's them in personality as well. When you get those really like, you know when you get those joke, does joke go out of comics? What is joke?

Where are you laughing at? I know, go. I love that. I'm just thinking, Frankie Carbone, they get in the argument about Sammy Davis. Oh, personality. Hey, I gotta say it perfectly what you said. He's got argument about Sammy Davis. Oh, personality.

I gotta say it perfectly what you said. He's got a lot of personality. Remember, I love that. I want to end up because a net can call over here. I love the Kelly personalized it though, because you're laughing. Well, she's, so she made it about her. She thought you were laughing at her. Yeah, because I just knew because I got, but I didn't want to interrupt your point because I was just doing a dumb good fillers, but I was laughing to myself.

Because I thought, you know, you know, the scene I'm talking about? Yeah, but you was laughing to myself, because you know the scene I'm talking about? Yeah, but you, she's personality. But she's, she's shell shocked at you, that you go, and she's like, oh, fuck me well. You know what I'm about to go, let me tell you about comedy, and Joe's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I thought that was gonna come out.

Just laughing about that. Well, Kelly, here's the deal. Me and Kelly were talking about a joke before the show she has this joke, and it's, yay. Yay. There it is. There it is. I was waiting joke. And it's, there it is. There it is. There it is. I was waiting on that one.

Yeah, there it is. But it's like, you know, like I can see a little clearer. When she told me the premise and the bit and I'm like I can see a little clearer, my site on her joke. And she told me I'm like that, you said this, you did that, you did this and that doesn't make sense. And she's like, oh shit, all right, I'm like, that you said this, you did that, you did this and that doesn't make sense.

And she's like, oh shit, all right, I understand a little bit, but it's like, but now I can't tell you anything else because then it'll be my way of doing it. And that will fuck you up because her way of telling a joke may not be my fucking way. You know, I could look at her joke.

I could take what she said and go on stage with it. Now, I think think what's that? I was playing with the bandana. Oh Not just pick your phone up and text same shit. I was looking at you though. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I know But now I lost my train of thought because you're saying that you could take her joke Yeah, but like we were talking about her jokes like her things where she's at right now like I understand that like when I was at When I was at the point with this CD I don't even know if I I just had pure fucking confidence and pure

I could just go on stage and fucking be funny like I didn't you know I didn't sit there Fucking sit there and write out shit. I went up, fucking made people laugh, went on tangents, went down roads, and picked shit up as I went. Like I'll keep that, I'll throw, I like this, I like that, and just kept doing that over and over. And then when I had to do my next CD, and I had to do it in these chunks of like, look, I need 50, you know, they were like, we these chunks of like look I need fifth you know they were like we need chunks of shit I was like oh shit I have they did well they were like we can't have 36 we can't when we put it on iTunes we can't charge a

dollar for 12 seconds of fucking material. Do you know what I mean? Like they were like, we need, it needs to be at least a few minutes long. We need a five minute bit to sell for a dollar. Yeah, we need at least maybe 15. You can't, you can't have 37 fucking. Look at this guy, yeah, whoa. And this album cost $10, but if you buy him individually,

it's $58. Yeah. I like that Bobby had a Kevin Knox impression on his album. Look at this guy. Yeah, woo! But look, I think you should always look back on your material and be like, okay, thank God, I begress, thank God I'm getting better somewhat. But I don't think you should throw it down the river.

You shouldn't, like even if you get a review from Elise or anybody else who's, who you're looking at it, how old are you? 25. You're 25. She's a 25 year old kid looking, we're in a different place right now. She was 15 when that out. In comedy.

Yeah, in comedy. It's a different environment out there. Dude, seriously, I watched the VMAs last night. I remember when hip hop was fucking kill a cop and punch a bitch and fucking you know shoot somebody in the face now it's now it's come on shoot it now it's a black guy next to ice and and a fountain and fire with a bandana singing about it's like alternative hip hop now.

It's like the alternative scene is the scene. It's not alternative anymore. There's hip hop guys who are fucking, the guy said it last night, I was the nerd that went to the party. I walked home alone. Now I have a VMA, okay? And the killers, the rappers, you know,

they use it. No, and jail. Yeah,, you know, they use it. No, and jail. Yeah, but no. It's just, it's a different environment right? The alternative motherfuckers, that's what comedy is right now. Well, it's like the same way, like, yeah, they're all skateboarders now. The same set, the same 10 people are in every comedy movie. I mean, it's the same people.

And I'm not saying that the bitch, bitch is just the way it is right now. But do you think that is working more now as far as in the world of comedy that's like socially awkward and being like, um, funnier cats reference and everyone's like, fuck it! Yeah! Whereas guys like, there's no one going out. Yeah, I mean that's just trendy, that's what people my age do, but there will always be different sort of genres that are co-existing. But yeah, that's what sort of times I've been in the top of my head.

Exactly. I mean, every, not only hip hop, killin' you. Look at nothing dies. Not like I said about Boston comedy. The me, Billy, Patrice, Dane, those guys that you are, they're not producing that comic from Boston anymore. They're producing guys like Joe List. You're, you're guys.

Big shoes to alcoholics with great jokes. Not what you were. No, I was sober. Billy didn't, none of us drank. We fucking busted balls and eight pizza after shows. We didn't go drinking. You know, I mean, it's a different, it's a different like climate out there that it's, that's not like that my thing died. I mean, if you look at the top comics right now, they're the ones that make in the money. You know, like the billbirds, the Louise, the Chris Rocks, Kevin Hartz, they're my style of comedy. It's not the other style of comedy.

So no one's really doing that anymore? No, they are. I mean, she said it exists. There's a little neck there. They're all crazy money. Jezz on neck, yeah, but Jezz on neck, he's not getting fucking Kevin Hart money. He's not getting fucking Louis CK money. He's getting, you know, somewhere above me

and someone below them. You know what I mean? He's getting good money. Jezz on neck's on fire right now. But he's not fucking Louis CK. No. He couldn't put a fucking show out and make a million dollars in a night.

He could become a 100 air, not a thousand air. I'm talking about a totally different comic, so he's such a one-liner. He's a one-liner comic. Brilliant fucking, I mean, dude, Jussle and X is a fucking, and Amy Schumer's on fire. Look, I saw Amy's hour, man. That's great. And Vegas fucking. I mean dude. Just like is a fucking and Amy Schumer's on fire. Yeah, I saw Amy's hour man It's great and Vegas fucking I was laughing my ass off. Yeah Really funny, and I think she's found a way to she's kind of mixed stories with one-liners

I know she's she's she has her her tags and punches are sometimes one line or ish Yeah, but a part of a bigger bit now very funny. I think the climate has changed, but now you're gonna, Change things. All right, well, anyway, as I'm glad you came on the show, we're gonna take a little break right now, we're gonna move on, I have my friend Kathy here. We're gonna talk some fucking issues with her, because you know what, somebody fucked my friend Kathy.

A friend of yours? Somebody fucked my, no, I'm using the wrong word. Fucked over my friend Kathy. Oh, that's changed the whole story. Then? Yeah, that changed the whole story. Yeah, I'm less interested, no. What's going on?

I'm dead. I'm dead. What's happening? I'm breaking up. So yeah, anyways, at least before we go, you know, you're staying on, you can you stay? Yeah, totally. Good.

Your review, if you wanna check it out, it's a really good writer. I mean, I wish I could review your review. I wish you made some grammar, grammatical fucking mistakes. I love the poor, really a fucking combo, but I'm too stupid to do that. Maybe I have somebody else to do that.

But it was a good review. I mean, it was a hurt, it hurt. I'm sorry. It hurt, but I'm too stupid to do that. Maybe I have somebody else to do that But um it was a good review. I mean it was hurt. It hurt. I'm sorry it hurt But it was very honest, but isn't it nice that people are taking what you do so seriously That's when I say something mean about something somebody at least I think I'm taking what they're doing seriously And that's a good thing. So when you do something great it means something because I don't just say everything you do is She's not a sick fan. I would just be like you're absolutely but I would take you just saying everything is brilliant. I would accept that. At least could ease up. I think we were all gonna hate Elise. It was gonna be fun. It was gonna be a whole thing. Well apparently somebody was supposed to fucking set it off and you

didn't. Well I didn't read the review, I read the review. I would be yelling epiteth. I would say. Okay, what? Epiteth. All right, let me read a couple things from the review, and we'll see. I want just, I'm going to point you. You bitch.

No, here, practice. Listen, when I point to you, you give me just what you feel. Just what you feel when I say this. All right. Horny. Oh, I thought it was Oh, that was He's pointing at me

He's always horny He's always horny He's feeling the boy, Jay It's quiet, keep talking Someone Ok, ready? Here we go There we go There you go con volotea la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca, espectacularismos,

lincones de película y un sincín de aventuras desperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de madrida murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com I First walk is it handwritten why can't you read it because I'm trying to because I'm trying to get something I don't I'm trying to get something that would be it's like a magic guy You're just still hurt. I read it every sentence Hi here we go Kelly stand up covers the well. I'll just read it Kelly stand a wet trotted

Trot grounded sex The last the goal humor mixed with some less, a less than earth, shadow remarks. Here's the thing, I have a thing, I have a puck around my right eye, so I can't see out of my right eye, so go fuck yourself. I'm getting eye surgery in a couple weeks.

Can I just correct that you said it's the last school and I said scatological? Oh shit, okay. Is he? Is he all gonna come in here? She's critiquing your critique of the critique? You are a shitty person Scott what does that mean?

Statological shit humor can you at least say it dumbly? Scott I'm meeting poop this shit. Does that really mean shit humor? Scott why could you did you did you have to look that up? What did you just have that on your brain? No, I just that's what that means. Yeah, but you just had you had scat a lot of logical What about the fuck it is you at least you wanted to use you know nice words in Talking about shit jokes I would respect to you more if you wrote a presumption that's got a logical humor It's like he thinks shit jokes are funny. Yeah

Are you a K a you should have A to be funny in the article. You should have just put A-K-A. Wait a punch up your review. Shit jokes, yeah. That's a word I'm doing. We're gonna make your review funny, okay? Yeah. Uh-huh.

All right. He had a mix with some less than Earth Shattering. Wow. That's not even insulting. That's not even insulting. That could be amazing. It's just under earth shattering technically unbelievably good is less than less than earth shatter remarks about

New York smells and raking leaves you didn't like raking leaves joke I know that bit on the show I got to defend a lease this one. That Joe's changing set. I love it. All right, Raging leaves. First of all, the Raging leaves bit. I mean, come on, come on, man. That's just, that's both sides of the coin. I thought, it's company 101.

That's fine. That's an observation. That's observation. With a good tag. With a good tag. Do a little act that, innit a good little act that uh... uh... the raking leaves that is basically uh...

what let me see where we're breaking leaves uh... my father let me be rake leaves and i'd be like uh... rake him if they're rake him and they're there it's called fell no call fall that's why it's called fall all leaves of falling and rake in there there dad come up

With the season called fell all the fucking leaves fell I do this once the shit sucks and god named him leave Leave him there if him women is a tag if he named him pick me ups On the CD I see that but see now she just changed now. She's like now to see the other Yeah, here we go. She's got shattered Would you call that tag earth? Just glad to go to cool Japan Epitome am I saying that right epitome? Epitome what is that epitome?

It says the epitome epitome epitome Oh shit That's actually epitome? It says the epitome epitome epitome Oh, shit That's actually epitome bomb me. I've never ever read the word epitome in my life Hey my life have I seen it you just did and you learned it. I'm gonna go all Learned in something from this review. I want to read the other G.O.B. is a cold-blooded killer. I'm gonna read this view. It doesn't know big words. There we go I'm gonna read the what is this word I let our rips I'm gonna read something from the other guys of you really quick say this He talks about shit pussy

Besides besides besides being the most Mexican- looking Irishman Kelly is probably best known for his touring with dank gug, including tourgas and blah blah blah. All right. I'm gonna go. You can tell Kelly is a true Irishman, not just because his middle name is Patrick, but also because he loves to eviscerate his humor with passion. This guy's good. This guy's good.

But one he hates smart people. Can't stand them. Hey, what are you saying? What? Are you stupid? I'm not going to read the paper. That would fuck up my nap. I love the good thing. If you want to read this review, it's our Charlestown High School

Examiner, not com. Fucking boobie is so funny. I'm just saying, don't I don't I don't need I'm talking him Scatological or fucking epitome A pit of me I don't need I'm saying that this It's really this album doesn't deserve her

The contract The contract is It's just very fun While I don't find his premises and setups humor It's the other guy's like fucking shit so funny when he talks about pussy. I love Relate that I will back to a Lisa Hey, I relate to that humor that's not to say there is anything wrong with that subject matter pre Per say oh really are dropping

She sucks you suck you really blow drop in 10 of the words. She sucks. You just suck. You really blow. You need to get your degree in the end of the year. You know what? You know what I know? I know. I know, yeah. I know codes for video games.

Did you review that joke? Huh? Per se. Who would write, per se? You're reviewing all premise. She reads it's like she's reviewing something at the moment, but it's just you go, all premises have the potential for new fertile material,

fertile, what the fuck? But Kelly fails to expand on his ideas in any meaningful way. And his sex, and his set is mostly a list of shallow observations. What do you feel? Go. Pain. What do you feel, Joe? Go. I'm having fun. Go ahead.

What do you feel? Valeria. What do you feel? Sad. My prediction. Pain. Now let's go back to the other one. Lovely, lovely voice.

While a while as humor is grown up, he does not, he does know how to relate to the audience. Take, for instance, when snow days would be canceled. No school was like the closest thing to having an orgasm at age seven, Kelly joked. Preaching to the choir here, I grew up in Texas, then he's kind of relating to my joke.

I like this guy. Well, that's her, not him. No, that's not him. Is that her? This is this guy. Well, that's her, not him. No, that's not him. Is that her? No, this is the guy. That's a guy. No, this isn't. I haven't said a big word in five seconds.

This is, well, often melodic. I use a big word, like per se. I use, yeah. I use preaching to the choir. Do you think she would use that? I grew up in Texas, combined. I may have seen one foot of snow before I graduated. It was tempting enough to want to drive to my principal's house

the night before and just turn the hose. Was he working a bit? Yeah, he's actually working a bit. He's fucking working a business review. He's like, hey, you ever drew him over to your principals house? Yeah. The other problem was listening to the name. This guy works and during your

I you tell me who this is now yeah the other I like this game better the other problem who is the other the other problem with listening I'll know the other problem listening to a nearly decade old album that our social norms have unneverly what is that? I never I got it right evolved though would be a ridiculous it would be ridiculous to insinuate that the homophobia really did drop every Tendon Wow, you really just stagged

Homophobia is absent from comedy clubs these days Kelly Kelly's tendency to describe things as a little Faggy feels more in a different era. I don't know I kind of think that's funny. The word Faggy. Now what do you mean by Faggy? I would never I've never know anybody who says that. Oh, I'm welcome to the podcast. We call on a shit Faggy. How long have you been reviewing comedy? I've heard it, but it just doesn't feel like let me set it up for you in a second. That's because you you You're a review you lose a lot of faggy words Back jumping in whenever you want to say that's what he does. He's the fucking true. No, he's not he's lazy

First of all, I'm defending you because you fuck up when you want I fucked up on nine words Yeah, you fuck up whenever you want dad. Thank you I thought you said I lose it. I did I said that was a perfect example of the what the word faggy means you use faggy words That's like I agree like we watch Eddie Murphy Ron Okay, wait, this is again this gets good It's dangerous. Oh my god. Even didn't the lyrics was like I wore this or the fact His what the fags look at my butt. Yeah, it's referring to game to a fast I wore this or the fact is what the facts look on my butt. Yeah, it's referring to gay To a fast throughout your life. Oh my god. Eddie take it easy. I'm gonna catch that AIDS in my lips. I know. Yeah. Yeah.

All right. I'm here. Yeah, that's also just Look at AIDS in my lips. What? His review is very short by the way. I'm running out of I'm running out of room. It's The album is cut up to 38 mini bites of comedy, which he doesn't mind. Apparently, you had a problem with no one bit last longer than two minutes. Kelly goes for like a good, but wait a minute. This is the glass half has full half full as opposed to half empty with Elise. Uh-huh. Kelly goes for efficiency and effectiveness Straight. I think it'll be honor Distance. Yeah, all right. Then we'll go back to here we go ready glass is completely empty here

We go Okay, his material law women is hardly more progressive although it appears to have been Add equated even when it added is that it antiquated what the fuck is that man? Hi man, make a big word, jambad. I do. Stop it. Wow.

There's no. You can call that on the record. That's how writers write it. You can call that on the record on the CD. What does that mean? You had a joke about girls don't play video games and someone yells out on this when you were recording it. And that's what I talked about. But back then about that girls didn't but the girl in the audience did

that that shoes a lesbian she's I'm kidding I'm kidding she was a fact she was baggy hang on where was I this was good it was good I don't know I was thinking it's my favorite my favorite thing is when a girl goes suck my deck. My wife does it every once in a while. She goes, fuck, suck my deck. And it's just so mean.

And I'm like, I don't know what to do. You do? I bet you do. Oh, that takes from it. Appears, I'd have, okay. Even when it is recorded. When he learns that a male audience member doesn't play video games.

A male audience member doesn't play video games. A male audience member doesn't play video games. He's dismissed immediately as gay. When a woman pipes up that she does, his retort is, okay, you fucking lesbian, relax. Now, I made the same joke to him here, so it's still good. Here's the thing though, I was in Houston, so you have to take that into consideration. How about you do the little bit but you did make the same joke to us.

When in this. Yeah. Yeah. That's what she's saying. No, no, no, you referred to that someone that will watch in video games as being a lesbian and it. Yeah, but I was kidding when I call her a lesbian. That was the joke like that.

I was kidding. Like she's not a, I mean, I'm not really mean. She's a lesbian. Yeah, I know, but there I did it. I did it. She's this a I mean I'm not really mean she's a lesbian. Yeah, I know but there I did it I did it. She's this is what I did it then point to me. I want to give it a motion When I did it what the point is is I did it here as a as being hey It's not but I did it there. I actually father a let like you Lesbos crossed over the space to him continuing Yeah, because you spoke um, okay, so Oh, Jesus. Sorry, I love you, Kelly.

I love you, Elise. All right, so. Yeah, I love you. Yeah, I don't say anything, because it's neutral. Overall, it's thoughts on, I've heard reviews. What? Overall, it's thoughts on the fair,

what is this fairier? Fairer. Fairer? Sorry. Fairer, I mean, come on, Bonnie. That's me. I get you and sex are less than complimentary. That's a big word too and with a trick a track entitled Swimming Are Evil is intentional are not Bobby's brother probably only knows complimentary from the buffet at the hotels

That deserve more come on. I'm shy. I'm reading at least words in my brain. You're starting to fucking break a sweat. He doesn't come across as an overall. No. Okay. You got at least you tell me what over. The body is wearing over. Over. Yeah.

I said the whole thing across is overtly sexist. Sexist person. I don't. Even though you have a track called women are you? Right. But I'm not. I'm not sexist.ist person i don't even though you have a track called women are you all right but i'm not i'm not sexism i mean you know what you could massage you mystic back then a little bit but i love women actually of course i love being so man i can say a big word coming up let's get you going

it's gonna be a doozy commercials like that that's the one that you think is tough up key and now that up key back in commercials. What? commercials All right similar his propensity I'm actually getting I'm getting smarter from reading her I don't know what it means, but I said And you know what we're all proud of you. We're gonna color it after this.

Who wants a snack? In satellites. Falling into ethnic accents habitually walks the line of good taste. His annoyance at being mistaken for Mexican while visiting Los Angeles or his take on the relative sexiness of accents is clearly based on his own experience. He's not trying to win points through this is all good stuff kind of, right? That's a compliment. No, it's not bad.

But there was some big words that made it really. Get to the butt. Oh, butt. He fails to... That's what she said. Hello! That is Joe Lister, you said that. Yes, comedy. But he fails to add substantial ideas to the discussion, making the need for comically exaggerated accents questionable.

I think this is the review we gave Kelly too. I got Hang on let's go back to list comedy Greece is the movie He makes a quantum leap from topics. He slides naturally all the way from the Pronunciation of Massachusetts to the pronunciation of Massachusetts to the difficulty of pleasing women. Oh, I know who that guy is. He's good.

Bobby is fucking awesome. Massachusetts is wicked hard to say, especially when you're 9 beers in like I am right now as I'm really writing this. I love all those good love. I love all those bits. I love all those bit. I'm Irish, I have rights, remember? I've never heard the city. I remember that from seeing it live in 2003. I was 18 years old.

There are a few good laughs, a bit about a blooper reels from Osama bin Laden's video works well. And when he mentioned how he's still afraid of the dark, so you like that bit. And that he related to necessarily being a substantial amount of, I don't know. I'm not gonna pick words I knew. Indicative of his voice.

And Dick, come on, Elise. You used indicative. You really are, you're writing this in the recent journalism bread. Couple of years, but I still have fun this for me. Oh, right. You're writing this like a recent journalism grad. Couple of years, but I still have fun writing like this, so I do. Yeah, you and Joe DeRosa should mate. Yeah.

Joe's fucking dinner. I don't know what's doing Joe Lisbos. Yeah, Lincoln, you made your mouth small. Why would you do that? Ha, ha, ha. Hey. Hey, it's a little insensitive. Dude, come on.

You sing like a bird because your mouth is that small It's a beautiful day. Cholest is in the room. Oh, you think I have a small mouth. I've never noticed it before Oh, thank you. I see you do stand up. I've never know. Oh, no, what do you think of his stand up? Oh, boy.-Rus at best with a sprinkling of what's that I saw you in Seattle The black And And I know you are since I was 15 and What did you think of her show really oh no big words for her Let me fucking tell you something this old Bobby Kelly would have blown all these fuckers off stage

Check my pulse Only cuz it was so elementary You really did go a little fucking nuts on the word sweetie. I love it though Well all I can know is that none of my fans will be able to read that article so Bobby's right this dude. I don't even this fucking chick said spa synulsis. What is that? I'm gonna have dictionary dot com open mom mom Mom what it's a quote, dude. What's mom, mom. Mom, what is the quote? Dude, what's a fucking scarecrow talking to you,

the logger? I don't know. Dude, she called him a fucking scarecrow. That's racist. He's fucking Irish. I know his fuck, cause the bit, I know the bit. I know his mother and his uncle and she called him a scatter cacagol.

Oh, shit. Earth shattering. Why'd you use earth shattering, Jesus? I had a word count. Yeah, I. Oh, shit. Earth's shattering. Why'd you use earth's shattering, Jesus? I had a word counter. Yeah, I know, but less than earth's shattering. Oh, you know what you could have done? It's taking some of those huge words and broken up into eight different words.

And then you could have covered. Put a dip. Jesus, you did a degree. Come on, good girl. Good for you. All right, so long. Yeah, you'd be smart. Then the boys make you feel it, you should be dumb.

I want to bet. Oh, wow. Dang, if you're on the phone, I'll kill you. Yeah, I wasn't I'll have the water ball I'm gonna do this bag if I see you on my phone again. I'm throwing my phone at your face. Oh, that'd be good It's good radio Serious so that was fun please don't please god don't please Bonnie don't um Dan take over please body don't um damn take over um welcome welcome back how you should have went on your phone oh my god

texting yeah that's right lean writer um welcome back guys Kathy you look very upset are you just did you come on the show just to yell I mean about just to just to preview what we're gonna talk about is it about Twitter I don't even know what he's talking about i think i know i think you do i thought we had our twitter com we did and i thought it was that i don't know if you're going i got a lot of all of the on the i didn't have a lot of it later in the day all i saw that i was like a dribble

contre something no i think you said my tweets were dribble and here what happened after i didn't say that he was i didn't say that they said uh... narciss were dribble and here what happened after I didn't say that he was I didn't say that I didn't they said a narcissistic dribble. Oh, yeah, that's what they say fucking where that Joe Deroza called me Yeah, so I mean, and you don't know that was a pretty pretty way beside me, narcissistic, too I didn't call you nor I said it was it's there's some Twitter accounts that Sometimes aggravate me. Yeah when I can just tell it's just a hot girl. So what he said it to me was this, I can't stand her country ways. Go. I didn't say that.

I can't stand your country way. Obviously did. I mean, why would he be making that up? Bobby, I didn't say country ways. I'm kidding. See how Kathy just jumps on it right there? No, how would I think of it? I was trying to say, sometimes, like, there's hot girls on Twitter that are just like,

I don't like this. This is stupid. Why am I going to follow that? there's hot girls on Twitter that are just like I don't like this This is stupid. Why am I gonna follow that? That's not what I do I There's some stuff you do that. I don't know No, sometimes you do I go by whatever is trending and I just answer it. I'm not making that shit up It's like that's trending bullshit and then I answer it so you can take off We'll see you later It's like that's trending bullshit and then I answer it so you can take off if you want I'm awful at Twitter. Yeah, you just talk. I would like to thank Clayton persons no because people Peter Martin

Christian Montoya Jeffrey Sheldon they don't go to other people they just go between me and the person's again Thank you for donating to the you know what do you podcast That's how you answer fans claim persons actually donate a bunch of times. I really appreciate that I don't read those people's Well no one's reading that because it's between me and that person right. I know so that's why I rarely tweet out jokes and when I do They're medium at best right watch you have a lease review of them And when I do their medium at best watch him at least review them

Dantrize the spell things The hypocritical way 40 characters, but Dan is one character. Sad man. Wow, get that band down. Let's just get that off. I can't get off faster than I can. I think it was better than everyone's giving a credit for. I thought it was bad. Here's the new thing that I'm adding too.

We're turning the photo of Patrice when it's really bad that he has to look at you and judge you. Oh, all right. I love. I want it. What is this for? It's the bomb, Dan. When you say something something that's the ball

It's gonna be nice pick I can't be in dead. I want to hear more about this discussion. I keep going What no, I'm going to the Kelly show The reason I unfollowed it cuz I was just like on the toilet hung over and I'm like no No, that's a lie cuz when we were on the phone you said you're on the train you just a little train train toilet that's when I read the they should clean the whole thing up that's it

good that you have had him for doing that no not me for following no i know i would not mad i could give a shit it was like wow that's so like there's so much like i've never unfollowed anyone i I don't find, wait, no, just let me finish, okay? I don't go.

I don't find, I don't find, I never read people stuff because most people on Twitter are boring, right? Like it's very rare that you find anyone that's saying anything that really interesting, right? You don't find me, sister. Once in a while, no, you stop. But I follow up on Twitter for jokes. I follow all my favorite comedians,

and I follow- Every now and then you say you suck on Wait a minute stop. Did you just say I follow all my favorite comedians and then point to me and I follow No, no, I'm not saying and I was at least did you see that? Yes, step on what I was saying Bobby what I was saying I didn't say anything Yeah, you just said something you stop you just said you just suck I'm the one the a favorite comedian you are one of my favorite comedians I was trying to get bury you this weekend. I'm bury you in a levity lie You can't bury me Friday Saturday and Sunday me and then tell her to bury the middle. I'm gonna go up before them You can't I'm doing it. You're breaking contract. I'm very

I always agree that you're a hammer and you are one of my favorites Me and I was trying to get a plug in me and you levity live this weekend I have been breaking up this fight. It's not a fight. Oh I think I understand that you're saying like I wasn't mad But when someone whenever I hear someone say I couldn't give a shit that says it they were mad No, I That's a good point. That's a good point. No. We could have more women.

I would, I would have to do something. At least why don't you add a word? Or seven. Wait. No, but just like what you said, that's how I thought of him deleting me like, wow, that's interesting. He deleted me, that says something. Like, why the, that's a very strong.

Don't I didn't want you on my news feed? No, but I like, why would you, you're so offended by one of my tweets? I tweet maybe everyone's three days one thing Now you have to delete I've never deleted anybody and everyone on my Twitter feed is fucking boring I'd never delete anyone I could care. I just say something though. She's got a point. Here's the thing No, I do it very it seemed like there's emotions behind I was wondering what they were more hidden I'd be upset if I if I if one of the guys I don't know I would be upset but I just say something

What no I got I get people deleting me all the time I I don't know I'm out of comedian like I don't But that's not my job, so I just thought that was like a little You and it can you you say job again the way you just job I just thought there was like a You in it can you you say job again the way you just job Is that's a way that's the way at least would write job joh-ha She called profession profession Not my profession it's not my profession We're trying to both think about the work. I did not obtain a degree like fuck occupying. Yeah, there you go. I was just like,

oh, I don't know another word. We should have a lease on the show to make it better. Grimatically. Bobby, instead of that word, use this word. Incinuate that you don't necessarily. Oh, shit. Listen, I agree. I don't, I'm not going to take one one all the way through a fuck brain. You got a piss. I will take. We'll talk about you

when you go on. Here's the deal. I think that when you do psychologically, when you find out somebody who is following you, you're just like, look, you have a thousand of followers, you're not going to know, but how many look you have a thousands of followers you're not gonna know but how many followers you have Like 260 you get 260 followers you know You know the people that are kind of following you their friends yours or you know some you know some people you know Whatever and then when somebody falls you it's kind of a big thing that you have and then when they unfollow you Psychologically, it's like what the fuck did I do?

Here's a deal you have and then when they unfollow you psychological, he's like, what the fuck did I do? You're right, I shouldn't have unfollowed him. Here's a deal. No, I didn't understand. I wanted to know. I don't know. I don't follow people all the time. I was gonna text you or be like, what the fuck damn like?

No, I wouldn't follow you again. No, I don't know. I was hungover on the train. Does Joe to roast to follow you? No, that bothers you. It does. It does. It does.

It did when he was on the show all the time. Yeah, but it does now, too. No, it's like, man, I get it because I know Joe. No, you don't get it. What do you get about it? He's your friend. Yeah, he's your friend. I'm not saying he should or he shouldn't.

It's up to Joe, but I'm saying it should bother you because it's your friend. Yeah, you're right. Right? Yeah, follow him. Yeah, follow him. Oh, and he doesn't follow you back. Yeah.

To me, that says that Joe doesn't follow him. But to me, that says that Joe doesn't care while you're up to because I'm a two to three. And it's like, well, you're up to it. Yeah, like that's what that Joey doesn't follow him to me that says that Joe doesn't care what you're up to because Yeah, and it's like yeah, like that's why he's the Twitter feed is to say and promote stuff like he doesn't care What's the joke with Joe gonna go to your gig Hands that Friend of his and he has a lot of followers he could like look to know and follows me You don't think no love more than anything in life to then to unfollow me Seriously, oh as you got I know I'm not a great Twitter. I'm not I'm not calling me off I love more than anything in life, it's gonna unfollow me. Seriously.

Honestly, God, I'm not a great Twitterer. I'm not calling Twitter for Twitter. I promote shit and I say one thing and I do photo. I give shit, I guess, like I photos and things where I'm at and I'll say things, I'm not a funny Twitterer, but no one would love to unfollow me, but he can't.

Socially, he can't. He's one of my best friends yeah and he follows me because of that and and I and I do the same thing also yeah yeah you're right yeah you have a lot of I follow Kathy because I I she's my friend I don't think you follow me I do follow you fuck face sure, I'm gonna find, I'm gonna get back right now. If I win, you're gonna suck me. Yeah. You're dick? No, not my dick, just me.

Yeah. At least a nipple, suck it at nipple. I just want you to suck anywhere. I'll suck you nipple. It's a suck it at nipple. I'll suck you nipple. Dude, I'll suck it at nipple, it's fucking. Dude, I'll suck it at nipple, it's fucking.

Dude, I'll suck it at nipple, it's kid. Dude. All right, Joe, tweet something right now. All right, you're something hilarious. They're just pretty good. Oh, man. Earthshatters. I want, I want just. nipples kid right now hilarious or shatter i want i want i want i want i want i had some big ones really what are you talking about uh... democratic national convention of a new year i know what the fucking dnc is i'm talking about what the fucking president is i think i can say he's gonna do

it again i know what that is i'm saying we're there so i don't know what he was watching it i'd say you're watching it you said said I killed it at the DNC. That's like it's a circle around it. First of all, you really should say that. You were so serious.

I'm serious. That's not the way you say it. Yeah. I killed it at the DNC is the, you're giving the wrong information. You're implying that you were there. You're implying. That's the one I was like her.

I was there in spirit. You were there in spirit. You're here in spirit. You're in spirit. I'm drinking spirit. I only do well on Twitter when it's like a hashtag game is a good hashtag I'm like boom boom boom boom boom boom that's when I didn't wait what am I supposed to just tweet a bob Kelly would do just say I love bob Kelly followers by tweeting some dumb thing let me come up with the real pearl here if you tweet my name dumb dumb you'll gain followers yeah but

you're gonna get a notification anyways Yeah, I believe it's your name. He just just say I love Bob Kelly. Just say I love Bob Kelly Don't do at Robert. Yeah, just say I love Bobby Kelly. I'll say I hope it's a divide here. Just say it Okay, just wait it. Yeah, oh I'm a small gym mouth. Why is it going? Come on, all right. Yeah, I got you. I'm there. I'm falling. You're a chubby Joe. You're a chubby Joe. He wrote you're a chubby jerk. Joe, you really do kill it on to me. Please, the truth. That's it. That was incensuous. Yeah, I was a little me You're right at you get at least another water, please

I'm pathetic and inappropriate. Please Well, I I agree that it does it hurt your feelings. No, no, not really it seemed very petty like it to me I'm after the But you would be like talking shit about your mentor no, but like even when I had a fight with Joe to Rose here, I didn't unfollow him like I would never on like I just would it Twitter rules why are there Twitter rules social social rules? There's no rules. It's just my opinion and so I called up Robert. I said why fuck with Dan delete Well, she didn't really you you're mad you were mad Bobby told me you were mad you a man You didn't call me like no why would you come? You didn't come me like I wonder why didn't really you you're mad you are mad bobby told me you were mad you didn't call me but why would

you come you know come here like i wonder why did i i just like that why the fuck did you call me up like you're on a unicorn with no shirt on why would then delete me that would sound like that yeah if you're sure there's only unicorn you sound like this hello why would you delete me i want to believe in your head because it sounds awesome i'm on a unicorn with no share of a unicorn tone All right, well you call me up you were like what the fuck would Dan delete me? I talk about lint on the floor like that like that. I have a

Lint on the floor, you know what I mean? It was funny and we talked about it from and you're like oh get you on the pack I'll talk about it. I just thought like it was like when I saw that it was Dan. I do who untweeted me on Twitter. Well, that's your asking for. Yeah, you know what? But it's a problem. But you do care. You're doing who unfollowed you.

That's fairly clear. No, because I want to. I'm going to am. Because I want to. Because you're petty. That's a petty thing that you just call me petty. That's the most petty thing ever. Let me get an app called who unfollowed me.

So I get a unfollowed me so I can unfollow No, I don't give a shit Law form a Twitter I know that people are always like fucking at dance order why you suck on Twitter cuz I do Best show ever Just like a fucking stick a dynamite that you put in a show you're like let's blow this thing up This is what the show is is more women than men Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, You got a boner on it. I'm like, can you fly that? Anyway, I love it. Do you have a boner? Is that what you said? That's the most off-putting thing I've ever heard in my life. Why don't you write about that, Elise? Tell me,

you can pick words now. Tell me, hack statement about women having boners. Oh. She would never use the word hack. Inappropriate. They're all trying to fix it with this. Sinner them.

What do you think, Elise? What do you think about this situation? Let's get you away from you young you know Twitter. How old are you Elise? What do you think about that? Somebody unfollowing you? Does that bug you with that bother you if your friend unfollowed you? Yeah a little bit but I would get over it. It doesn't but now do Do you care about followers on Twitter? Um, I It bothers me when somebody that I talk to on Twitter doesn't follow me like No, they exist on Twitter and so on me. Otherwise, I don't really fucking pal play night. I fucking hide it Can I tell you something? Why does she just turn into fucking the crocodile hunter? It's a fucking pala play mate. I fucking hide it

She's what sometimes a grown female I Fucking power play mate fuck. I mean, he's sometimes a grown female. I feel like with your fingers, Dan, that's fucking gross. What were you saying, Joe? I found out a thing about Twitter that I didn't realize earlier, and I have to admit, I didn't follow some of you guys before because I went to your feed and it's just at this person, at that person, at that person, I was like, why don't I read?

But I didn't realize that stuff doesn't go into the Twitter feed. No, it just goes between you and the person. Yes, yeah, I didn't know that. We'll see into the Twitter feed. No, it just goes between you and the person. Yes, I didn't know that. Let's explain that again. Like if someone says something to me. I think I know that. If someone says something to me like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.

Well, you didn't know you weren't, sorry. I didn't know that. I didn't know that again. I didn't know that again. I didn't know that. I didn't know that. I didn't know everybody was. I didn't know that.

She's an extrovert. Well, you know, like, you do talk over people. Sorry. You don't use your headphones. I want your headphones to be up four points higher than anybody else's at all time. No. I'm not going to do it.

What is your name? Wow. No, please no. This is our minority here. Now you're here with me here. Oh, no. Is my ear always this loud? In our head you are.

Wow. When you're talking over somebody, yes you are. Turn up my mic mic not my headphones By the way, I know because you wouldn't turn up your headphones Anyway, it was news feed You know Joe just gonna be a baby If you started tweet if I replied to your tweet Yeah, like my my tweet starts at Robert Kelly the tweet. I just tweeted doesn't show up on people's feeds

And let's they follow both of us. Yes yes so I thought like I went to like dance for instance like you had like 50 tweets in a row that are like at like hey man great thanks a lot so I was like why don't really want to follow but it doesn't actually show up my feet so only when you tweet a joke it shows up my feed so for a long time I wouldn't I wouldn't follow people that just had at at at at at at at because like why don't you want to hear that? If you put a period in front of the at that all your fault, right? If you put a period in front of the at.

If you put a space. If it starts with at, it just goes to that person. Yeah, right. So I could say to Kathy, I want to suck your left tip. It goes to whoever follows. If they follow both of you. If you follow both of you They'll see it in the news feed right so specifically to your feed they can see it but it will automatically come up

What's a difference between it but then a ray tweet goes to everyone as well and you're saying like a dot does as well like so If you tweet at fucking Bob dick smith He's right out of grade having sex. I said I doesn't come up on my feet unless I follow him. Right. So all the shit you tweet at people, I didn't realize that until like a week ago. Yeah. So now you follow every time. What's the difference between you and me?

You didn't follow me. No. I thought you tweet at people. So I would, I'd go to your feet and be like, oh, this is all. Do you, I follow you now. Since when? So a while ago, like two months ago. Oh, OK.

Yeah. Dan, do you follow me? You're following him? I follow him. OK, I didn't know what he was. I love Liste. Do you follow the podcast handle as well? I do.

Yes. Please don't talk to me like that. She's naked on a unicorn. Do you follow the podcast universe? I was not a full-length like that. Unipoprize. I was talking I'm sorry. Well, listen, I think we've learned a lot of things and it was like as I was talking, I'm sorry. Well listen, I think we've learned a lot of things today.

Wait, this isn't ending, right? No, I want to keep going. Well we're going to go for a little longer, but don't ever tell me, you have to pay. You have to pay. I think we've learned a lot, did I have ending voice? You got ending voice. You had rapid up voice.

I thought you had broken up with. And you saw all of our sad faces go, oh. Well here's a deal broken up with. And he's still all of the outside, but he's gone. Well, here's a deal. I think that we should take a little break so you can pee. What do you want to keep going? I need a pee too. Do you need a pee? Is anybody need a pee?

I do. Let's do a pee thing, all right? Okay, great. We're going to take a little break to pee. So I want to go while she's going. It was a smell of toilet seat, you know. All right, we're going to take a little break to pay. Um, and then then make sure me, make sure to, uh, stay fucking tuned, I guess. Are you mad at me?

Yeah, I'm fucking pissed. All right, you guys, uh, support the show. You've guys been supporting it with the donations, which we, thank you so much, because we, uh, we're able to do the video on Newstream because of your donations. You guys go to the website, ryecast.com slash robbercale. I'll just hit the YKWD button on ryecast.com.

You guys know where to go. And there's a donation button in Jeffrey Sheldon, Clayton Person. You're almost there, come on. You got two out of two. Peter Martinu. It's close enough. Okay.

And Christian Montoya. That sounds made up. It's his name. And again Clayton person, these donated a lot. Kyle, Nomoitz, Mark, is that a mix call? It's a bank account? Oh, wait a minute. I'm kidding.

That's mine. So yeah, thank you guys. Thanks a lot for donating. You know, whether you donate $5 or $50,000, it helps. It depends on if Kelly eats or not. Don't donate. It does. helps we uh... depends on if kelly eats or not ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha but we do need your help. He's really changed your song right there. Well, I don't want you to think that we're fucking dying over here. Dine over here, man! But we do appreciate it.

We know, this is always free. I don't want to think that you have to fucking kill yourself. It's always going to be here, whether you donate or whatever. But the one great way to help us is help our sponsors, which one of two, Amazon.com. If you're going to buy anything off Amazon, anything I talk about on Tech Talk, anything you want, go to Amazon.com through our page on Riot

Cast. Go to our page. Don't go to anybody else's page. Don't go to fucking anybody else's page. Do not go to Hammer Fisting's page. He really just became a fucking possessive boyfriend. I love my mood swings. Yeah. And just really really if you really just want to just go to our page don't go to anyone else fucking You're fucking you're fucking great You go to broadcast YKW page Go to my page

Hit the Amazon button if you're gonna buy anything right now is on and it Approach to that a very small proceeds goes to us for the more you spend the more we get and it helps out and if you are a video game guy You know because girls aren't because they're lesbians if you bring it up And if you don't play video game guys guys you're a faggy. I don't play video games because you're faggy But you know what the good thing about Joe is he likes watching people play video games. That's a real thing I a football they play football. I totally love watching people play football play video games Sorry, I fucking started on that. So he's saying yes, I do well like we'll smoke part of his house And then him and needle play football and I'll watch it like it's a football

Maybe you can watch two flies fuck if you're on pot even just like Pot yeah, everyone my You on the pot. Did you take pot? So if you guys play video games, make sure you go to our page, you can't write a cast, why KWD, hit Gamefly, we're gonna give you two free weeks of Gamefly.com, that's basically Netflix of video games. So you don't have to spend the $70, and then it's gone.

You don't get to return it, you get like five or six bucks and nine bucks back on the game. You can just get as many games as you want, I think two at a time, and you get to five or six bucks and nine bucks back on the game. You can just get as many games as you want. I think two at a time and you get to keep it as long as you want. Return to get a new game. Return to get the old game. It's just a great way if you're a video game, shit dick like me. And you love playing video games on Xbox or Sony or Wii, whatever your system is.

You can get the games and play them and not have to spend, it's like $70 friggin' for some of these games. 50 bucks, it's ridiculous. Two free weeks, gamefly.com slash YKWD. Go to that link, gamefly.com slash YKWD. Join up through there, you get two free weeks, which is a $22.95. How do you say that?

22, 22, 95 offer, and how do you? 22, 95 value. Oh, value that? Two, 95. How would you say that? Please stop, stop.

I'll leave you. So, I called you're here, Elise. How would you say that? I'm not sure exactly what you're saying. Okay, it's basically what they're getting is worth $22. $22. $22. $22.

$22. $22. $22. $22. $2. $2. $2. $2.

$2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. $2. Oh, well, they're just saving 22.95. Is that more complicated than that? $22.95. We're worth $22.95 value.

That's right, you said value. And it works shit on me. No, you know what I know what it is. You go, like, if you get, you know, I just can't do the value of 22.95. So getting something worth the value. It's been a value as well. It's been a value as well.

Before 22.95. Enough. You put the cut up. But no. No value as well before the 229. Enough. You put the cut up. You put the cut up. No, but the cut up. Shut up. Shut up. Enough.

It's $22.95. Oh my god. Value. I just learned from this episode. This is my podcast, and I'm not smiting it up for fucking a lease. What are you doing? Nobody doing a Labor Day commercial.

I'm Bob Kelly. And on my podcast, you get a value of 20 to 95 and it is value And another thing is it's Kelly would have been raised in this country. It's value is more than 22 It's value. It's value. It's value It's talking about it's you're saving that one talking to Michael is free and you're saving $23. Yeah, you're saving Yes, free yep, I thought it's value. It's that a cost 20. Oh, it's free You it would have cost that if you had to pay it. Yeah, it's free. Yep. I thought it's value. I thought it costs 20. Oh, it's free. You, you, it would have cost that if you had to pay it.

Oh, then it is value. I was it's value. It's video games are for facts. Yeah, unless you're a lesbian. Oh. Oh. Oh. All right.

All right. So we're, we're back. We're back. Now, Kelly, I mean, Dan, you hate Kathy. For some reason, I don't, I don't hate Kathy at all. No, we're talking. Oh, yeah. I don't, I don't hate Kathy. Kathy, Dan, you hate Kathy. For some reason, I don't hate Kathy at all. No, we're talking. No, I don't hate Kathy. Kathy, why are you hate me? Let me ask you a question.

Why you got to really love fucking starting shit? If she was like raising her up, she's right there. And her boyfriend was getting arrested, she'd be like, hit him! Hit the cop! Don't let him push you around like that! What are you real man? And then be like, I'm gonna do it!

And then fucking go to jail. Because she's a fucking animal. And then she goes, like she goes by. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like, he's like, he's teaming up. No, she's like, yeah, when he fucking disses me and then when I just say, yeah, so she's like, I just, no, you're not.

I'm gonna do the stupid. Shut up. I would be totally like a fan of you. If someone I've been, I'm gonna be on Twitter. You don't know me. I'm a fan of someone I've been I don't think Kelly I don't think Kathy buys Kelly's excuse She went oh really really really I love it. I'm trying to get that to admit that I made Who made out person crime boss you to made out? Yeah, I did tell me I Tell me Her Not I meant that bullshit

Your god sucks she's doing what you said yeah, she's trying to insgaid some shit She's a fucking she's the shit that fucking criminal blood flowing through From a This dog really fast is stuck with the innocent, yeah? Wow, that's true. People talk fast at least. I believe in. Clear, clearly and slowly, that fucking heathen is lying.

I want you to slow down. I want to bring you back. Dan, stop, stop. I'm going to ask you a question. Yes. I want you to be on a unicorn no shirt. No unicorn. Okay.

Unicorn no shirt. No shirt. Okay. Unicorn no shirt. Of corn. Yes, Bobby. Did you make out with Kathy on your day? I tried and she didn't want to. How did you try? Did you grab a hair and pull her down and push her head on a curb? Well, that's kind of rapy. So now I did. I was trying to say it. Say it. Say it on the corn. Say on the corn. Say on the corn. Say it on the corn. Say it on the corn. Yes. And I said, we should make out.

And Kathy said no. How did you say no, Kathy? I don't even know. She said maybe next date. She was open about it, but not me. Do you stand? She's saying you're a corn voice. Staying on the corn.

Kelly is a fucking asshole. And she's trying to instigate shit. Really? Because she's a real Island of lawless criminals. I was sent there because they created the most... Stay on the corn, stay on the corn. And in England. And none of the people in England wanted them there.

So they put them on the farthest place away. Dan, if you knew anything about my family, my family were actually immigrants, so I never came from Britain. No, so who goes there? Why do you call me a vacation? Yeah, I should've known you fucking know me at all. Oh, so you got mad. I got her. Yes, I got her. She's passed by here. Awesome, it goes there. Why you don't make a fucking no me at all. Oh, she got mad.

I got her. Yes, I got her. She's passed. She's showing real emotion. Kelly always does this smile in the... Oh, Bobby, are you not mad at me? And then when she gets it, she's like, Fuck you.

You don't know my family. You want to want to rest from Italy? And they put the currents? I was on a beer. And she put the port to LA. No, I didn't see ruse. I never abandoned her on my mark. I was in the really and she for no I don't see Reuse I Didn't abandon her my my my fucking shit Joe's on fire

Not fucking wearing that shit whoa I think we should make this like a four-hour drive-time radio This is the most fun The body in the groove guys don't know how bad my life is Listen what what seven the wolf Don't know how bad my life is Kelly did you really lie? Why? It was just fucking pumpin up. No, that's a lot. No, that's a lot

That's a lot if they didn't make out and he didn't tell you that drunk She used by drinking that be a fucking lie you weirdo make out and he didn't tell you that drunk. She used by drinking that be a fucking lie you weirdo. She used to try to just like, I mean I'm stupid at least correct him. And my jokes on of the day for this. I'm like, I'm gonna get out of you. And he's like, no, no, I'm like, I'm gonna fucking get the truth out of you. You want to go? When he says he didn't make out with someone, I don't believe him. I want to ask you question. That's the truth. Right now, looking at Kathy. Do you still want a banger? Not a bank. Kathy, yes, you still like her. I

Don't doesn't necessarily like it loves it shit Listen to me shut the fuck up the honest D listen to me. I thought I actually fucked up the way I worded that But the honesty that you're actually listening to me and you went looking at this. That's what really mean. Oh, that's what necessarily mean. I like her. Well, just, that's the hardest thing. I'm being honest. Oh, no, that's okay. I love you, man.

I fucking love you. I also like that too, though. I think people are like, let me ask, I'm not going to ask you because I know your answer. I want to ask, I want to ask I want to ask Elise Oh dear. Yes, and 600 words Oh God damn it Do you are women the same like that? I women the same. Do you look at a guy and just want to bang him

and not like him at all? Sometimes, yes. Is the question really do women fuck guys that they don't like, of course? Yeah. Well, I'm not. Sometimes you've got to get you. So a guy you don't necessarily like, you'll fuck him.

Yes. I mean, not somebody I like to test, but somebody who's fine, sure. Somebody who's fine. Yeah. Check this one. Yeah. Guy already fucked was like in a situation when we started.

I don't like that your hair and your headphones are the same color. I mean, that's just like Princess Leo. Yeah. That had, got you a fucking, yeah. Does that work? So the situation when I was like, you know, dating, blah blah. And then I was like, Why are you eating in the bathroom?

I was eating. I was like, I'm just like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, you know, dating, blah, blah. And then, Why are you eating in the bathroom? Why are you eating? I was eating. I was like, I'm just like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like a fucking idiot and I was like yeah, I'm feeling a bit sick I think you should go so I fucking told you to be sick. Yeah, I told him to leave like what kind of sick an ear egg Howdy something you couldn't Eric what I went to have a shower before we had a shower. You know what I think? There's water. It's something that turned on. I'm like, I'm out of nowhere. I wouldn't have a shower before we had sex. Hold on.

And then I'm like, I'm just gonna stop it now. I think he better go. He's like, go. I think he better go. Because I, but I could have, but he's someone who already fucked, who would have fucked him, did not fuck him. Because I was like, get out of my hand.

I can't feel what's happening. Bobby saved some again. Last one. Where did it go? When, when was, I, first of all, Bob was saved some last one. Yeah, sure. When was, I first of all, one was last time you banged. Just last weekend, right? Yeah, like four days ago. You banged.

Do you have a boyfriend now, Elise? No. You don't have a boyfriend. So do you have a guy that you fool around with? Or sometimes? Oh, so you have a booty call. Yeah. I like, you know why I like Elise?

Get on. I didn't think she'd fucking be on the script. Yeah, good for you. But she's, that, she's dead on us. What'd you say about a review? I That fucking honest. Yeah, wordy wordy. He's fucking honest. Can you believe we have she takes the trip to flood city? Yeah Luxurious intercourse. I just saw that. I love that. Okay. flood city It was from a previous episode. It's a callback.

It was a whole thing about finger fucking. Finger fuck and I touch the J spot and it goes splurts. Anywhere. Yeah. Wow. When we and Dan don't step over the line Kelly, maybe you should tell you. It really takes the romantic allure out of it. Yeah.

What city would you use a lure? Yeah, no, that's good. That's good. The dialysis is on that we haven't sexually that would suck if you found a note from her Redder diary How do you done fucking there's just an 11 paragraph fucking you stinking bed or you just hear going to the other room just Fucking keyboard going nuts. No, you look up as your finger blast in her and she's typing on an iPad. I found your kind of like a subit soft moroc. Nice. You use the typical rudimentary fucking first index finger instead of going too in. I read on his narcissistic.

Yeah. Kathy, what? What? Oh, the word narcissistic. You asked all of us. Now would you? No, I know the answer to her. What? She right now, I know her answer.

She doesn't bang anybody right now. I had sex, I bang someone. You bang somebody? Yeah, it's sex, I'm sorry. Oh, coming up here, I got one. Yeah, but that's why, oh yeah, but that's other sex. We're it's like one. Yeah, but that's why I owe you a but that's other sex. We're not we're not talking about you don't you don't randomly you don't really let me just

fuck it dude. No, but I always have one person that I'm banging. You always have somebody that you're fucking. One person. Now do you know? Very popular by nature. Are you are you now? Yeah, now that I don't drink. I think if people didn't drink it. Yeah, let's not get carried. What was your nickname? What was your nickname when you worked at Cafe Waw? The mad spitter. The mad, your nickname was the mad spitter.

And what did I say, Bobby? Yeah. No, that's because I spit in people's dreams. You're sweating paper's dreams, that's why. And I, yeah. Yeah, she used to throw cigarette butts in people's hair. Fuckin' hell. I did a girl called the happy swallower.

Hello. All right. What has that been, Dan? That's fucking deserves more, Matt Spitter. You can't fucking touch that. I just wrapped it around your mouth. I don't care about any of you. Actually, tie a baby knot and hold it in your mouth.

So yeah, I mean, you, you. I always have somebody. You know, I talk to them like. I always have somebody. I mean, I don't pull, I think sex is very healthy. And you shouldn't go more than a month without getting laid. Really? Absolutely. What if you're married? I think sex is very healthy. Do you shouldn't go more than a month without getting laid? Really? Absolutely.

That's always very cool. What if you're married? I'm gonna die soon. I mean more than that, but I mean, I don't think it's healthy not to have sex. So do you think that you still would you still think you'd fucking want to buy a Kathy, but you'd you'd be in unattracted to Dan anymore because of his fucking. No, I like it. We had a good date.

No, I don't have change like that. I liked him. We had a good date. You know, he's got a huge piece, right? Does he? Oh, look at you fucking. What are you actually pointing at me? Wow.

Does that change things for you? No, I was attracted to him because I dug his personality. I thought he was very cool. I liked the way he liked me. Can you guys into me and I thought that was really hot? I just put it, you know, what am I going to do? Start having like a booty call relation with it. It just wasn't like anything. I can do this Can we just always the only reason we were gonna date?

But if there was potential, I would have went there. Can you fuck him for the show? Just so we can have I find your personality to be the least attractive thing You can you can you guys fuck for the show? I think it would just be- Here's the thing, do you understand? If you guys, well look, you fucked a million guys. You fucked a million girls.

That's one more! Come here! I don't mean a million. I'm exaggerating, at least. I'm in an overtake. I found Robert's exaggerations to be over tried. And in a- Well, if Kathy doesn't fuck Dan, I want Tatiana too, because I want him to report back to us.

Tatiana. Where'd she shiver, Pimp? She's just like, I want this. I think Kathy, because Kathy would really fuck the shit out of you. Like Kathy would make you work for it. You wouldn't just be able to go in there and go fucking- I've got a slow back to it. She'd make you come again. Yeah, she would not let you get away with some horseshit. for it. You wouldn't just be able to go in there and go fucking yeah you she talk

she yeah she would not let you get away with some horseshit like you know if you bang Kelly she just be sad after not talking and passive aggressive and fucking roll over and she'd be on the phone no mom I'm doing good no everything's great yeah I gotta go all. I'll see you later. I'm just over with my mom's Yeah, but it Callie would not I mean Kathy would not let you get away with that Yeah, not at all. I think it should happen. I think you try What do you think I would do? Look what do you think I'm demanding him? No, I think I think yeah, I think that you would make him fuck you the way you want to be fucked Yeah, I don't think you would make him fuck you the way you want to be fucked. Yeah, I don't think you'd let him fuck you.

I think you'd be like, if I'm getting fucked by somebody, you're gonna fuck me the way I want to be fucked. You're gonna fuck the shit out of me, you're gonna make him go down on you. Yeah, you're gonna make him take... You're gonna get out of it, but... You're gonna really? You wouldn't go down on it? I didn't say no at all. Okay, listen. I think that you...

That's weird though, one guy's don't like to go down on girls. I agree. That's weird too. Why is that weird? If they don't want to go down on girls. I agree. I agree. There you go. Why is that weird? It's a bit exciting. If they don't want to go down. What if you see a tooth? They'd get out.

Or a hot, a hot, baiting back at you. Just like, boo boo boo boo. What do you see one little thing, too, that she hasn't brushed? We need to look at the dogs lip. Exactly. Yeah, and it's like yellow at the top. It's got a little black on it. Yeah.

What were you eating? When Kelly came out of the bathroom? I ate like a man. I don't tell that. Thanks. There we go. You guys, would you have what? You guys wouldn't know.

You're not in sexist too, still crazy for you guys, right? For you to. Like you wouldn't have sex with somebody for something. What do you mean? As for shits and giggles. No, I do it because I want to be with somebody. Right, all right. Elise, would you have sex with Dan just for the show so we can you can review it. Oh, that was funny. That was good.

What'd you say? How would you do it from Mark Marren show? For a top five. Alternative comic show. For the Beards of Williamsburg show. I do it for America's good talent. How is that not a laugh line? That's hilarious. I love the Joe. It's a big show. It's a hit show. Plus the talent is second.

What are you selling? It's multi-layered. You got to believe in my joke. Just like Bobby's bullshit 12 years ago. I believe in this. I think America's Gut Talent is going to believe in me. I'm not spit. I'm still not doing it. I moved on. I mean, it's not a chunk that think America's got talent is good. I'm not I'm not spit. You got I'm still not doing it. I moved on

I mean, I just don't a chunk my America's got talent. Apparently. I don't have chunks either. I have a little mini bits You got some chunks under your shirt. Hello. Oh, I don't know. All right. I lost it. All right guys Listen, I think that we've solved a lot of problems. This is this is overjump. It's okay. I end on that It's oh yeah, we're ending on you, but here's the thing we've learned a lot. We've solved a lot of problems. This is over, Joe. It's over. I end on that. Yeah, we're ending on you. But here's the thing, we've learned a lot. We've learned a lot from Elise. We've learned some big words.

We've learned some really big words. Our lexicon is improved. Is that clean that correctly? Yes, you are. Thank you. Okay, yeah, scatological, which means, basically, shit. Yeah, me just shit.

We learned epitome. Yes, just shit. We learned a pit of me Yes a pit of me and we learned that it's spelled weird Pit oh me Pit oh me. What's the other weird when we learn cross-pensed to tea Preprensity Preprensity is a weird one. We weren't a lot for you. Elise. I'm glad you came on I'm glad you weren't because I asked you and I put in the email. It's not a setup I didn't want you to think that we were I was setting you up to go you fucking you don't fucking know shit from shine

Ola or it's a cool so you don't know Scatacora scatological from shine Ola All right, but yeah, I appreciate you coming on. And you know what? For your first article, I think it was a little overkill, but I understand you. You beat a dead horse? Yeah, I think you beat a dead horse.

Yeah, you're fine. You beat a dead horse, but I think you're a great writer. I think in the future when you're doing a 10-year-old comedy-alm, save some of those words. I hope to never review a 10-year-old comedy album again. I hope you should. I think you should. That should be a... That should be a release. It's called a lease back in time. It's called a release again. You should actually, but this is what you do, unlike you do.

You did it a little bit in mind, which I think would have been interesting if you compared the growth or the difference between the two albums would have been interesting if you compared the growth or the difference between the two albums would have been actually interesting to do to see for electricity for new comics or re, right, re, right, re, right. I don't want her anywhere near me. I don't want to. Kate, you want to kill us that football?

I want to listen. No, but I think that would be interesting if you did go back and get like an old album off of somebody and then get their newer album and then do a compare. Is that the word you, I thought you were going to think, bigger one. That would be interesting. But no, you're a great, you're a very talented writer.

Julie is really, really picked up a really interesting, good person. I don't know, I know you. She's she has some so spit take comedy spit take.com and what's your Twitter? Elise ZZ. So if you want to follow her and some of her upcoming reviews and please. I'm not gonna be mean about it. Yeah, no, be a dick. Look, look, listen to the album, read a review. There you go. And that's why comedy is very, comedy is very subjective. Or fucking personal, bro. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

I think my way better. Yeah. So make sure you go there. Kathy. Yes. I love you, babe. I know, I love you too. I love the fact that you come on and she's a fighter.

She does, I love it. Yeah you come on and she's a fighter. She does, I love it. Yeah, you know what, she stands her ground and I respect it. I've known, how long have I known you? Like 13 years. 13 years, yeah, she's the best. Because she does, she's a fucking loon. She's a loon attached.

But we're all fucking crazy. Yeah. I love crazy people. I love interesting crazy fucked up people. You know what I mean? I love, I, that's why I love movies when they have fucking weird faces and fucked up people. I love interesting crazy fucked up people. You know what I mean? I love I love movies when they have fucking weird faces and fucked up people. Yeah, how body goofy face. I like huh? I like like a spaghetti westerns when they just pick the weirdest faces and fucked up people just cause it wasn't all good

look. You know what I mean? I love hanging around fucking weirdos and Kathy's definitely a fucking weirdo but she's she's in touch with the witch. I love you. So Kathy. What's your Twitter? Courteen therapy. Do me a favor make sure you go to add cartoon therapy on Twitter and follow her you guys Follow me. No, don't don't follow me and then unfollow me. Don't do that. That will fuck with her self-esteem I don't know she'll be checking her unfollows Yeah, if you ever get into a point where you're gonna kill yourself out of depression, take a picture of your tits and send it to me first.

Don't let those titties die with you. Yeah, don't let those titties die with you. Well, do it. Topless. So I'll just fucking download your autopsy photo. Crop the fucking gun out from the picture. Right. Here's like, hey.

All right, Joe list, at Joe list comedy. Yeah, are you mad at, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, you're just like, Oh shit, he fucking. That's it, seriously. What was the great joke? I ready to cut that one down. And September 20th, I'll be at the spot in Providence with my donut. Damn it. Hey, friend of the show. Kady, where am I going to be soon? I'm going to be at, oh no, Liberty is not going to be out.

I'm going to be out. Dance order. I know, that's what I was doing. Don't tell me to do the show. I know, that's what I was doing. At dance order. What are you? At dance order. What are you at dance order? What are you at dance order three times? Followed dance. Oh, you got a lot of forest on the show People love you people would die for you back. So you're back. Are you back next week, too? Back next week?

I'm back the next couple weeks, baby. Oh That truck podcast might have to happen. Yeah, and I'm gonna be sober with you. Oh Just calm down on the drinking. That's wild La la la, we might have had a drunk podcast, but we'd have to happen. Yeah, and I'm gonna be sober with you. Oh. We'll just calm down on the drinking. That's wild. Kathy's doing her makeup. You're doing makeup? During her books.

That's what you're gonna do. But I'd figure you and I could be the beacons of sobriety. I was gonna be funny when I was the beacon. Yeah. Just to see you get drunk with Joe. Hmm? I don't drink.

Yeah, right. Anyway. It's a $7 dollar light cap. That's a lot of stuff. What happened to Joe during the night? Yeah, his fucking coffee drink. Yeah, right. Anyway. It's a $7 like cap, so I don't. What happened to Joe Derrero? Yeah, his fucking coffee looks like a Christmas tree. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. We're gonna get Joe on, hopefully. Well, if he's not fucking doing,

has a meeting or a thing or a filming something. He's glasses on his son. He's hurting his slacks. Dude, can you, dude, I gotta, I have a meeting. It's 11 o'clock at night on a Sunday, Joe I know I'm taking a call early in the morning. Yeah, I'm taking a call. What let's come back on the show You got so good Joey D. Yeah, I do too. All right. That's good Linda. What do you got? Okay, wow apparently she's never plugged anything your website

Plug your website baby get up here and put your face on that mic anything. Your website. Plug your website baby get up here and put your face on that mic. Lend it to early dot com. Talking to the microphone. Lend it to early dot com. Lend it to early dot com. Awesome. I should get a picture of her. Say what she looks like. She is. That's what we need. It's just a bunch of my savages. It's crazy. It's crazy. I'll be jerking off to the photographer of the show. That's good. That's good.

Yeah, good. You know, I've moved on from when I was my first comedy, okay? I don't look at women like that. All right, I'm gonna carry the show with all the jerks off, okay? You not put your fucking hand in at least his face. Yeah, it was pulled through in the fucking eye. I love the Kelly's just a fucking lying instigator of the show. She's a flip-flopper and a liar. Yep, and that comes from corporate dance.

So if I'm taking a side on something, you know your role. Where am I, Kelly? OK, so hopelessly devoted to you. So the 20th to 21st to 22nd and a 2030 will be in San Antonio, Texas at the La Pau, La Eon, Chicago, in a club. Awesome. And check it out. I just booked stress factor in Jersey. Oh.

Yeah. Yeah, so make sure you come down to that. And somebody maybe from this room might be meddling for me. Oh. And it's not Dan. Oh. Oh. It's not Joe.

Oh. It's Kathy. Hey. Elise, you get a fucking right about it? You better fucking not do it. Live the life. Live the life, Elise. Are you guys awesome? Thank you for the support. Sorry for this long drawn out fucking it.

Oh, Kelly. My mom's sorry. Mama, I didn't mean to do that. You know what it was? Is that what you should have did you before me? Well, because you weren't starting to up, but it's mean to do that. You know what it was? Is that what you should have did you before me? Well, because you weren't starting to wear, but it's not even for me, it's more for the podcast.

It's for you, I want you. It's for the podcast. First of all, fuck you. Kelly, let me tell you something. But Kelly just took a shut your face. Kelly just took a good works harder than anybody on the show. The group.

Honest to go. That's the show. Other than that, she doesn't work that hard. But honestly, God, the show would not be where it's at today if it wasn't for Fistuka. Honestly, God. I'm not being silly. Believe me, I don't give compliments when they're not due.

So shut your mouth and let this happen. Please don't look at me, why is that? You're making me feel nervous. I'm going to get on the unicorn shirtless right now. Kelly Vistuka is amazing. Oh my God. At what? At joke, can you please?

No, she's unbelievable. Kelly, please check out Kelly Vistuka. Follow her on Twitter. Occasionally she writes funny things. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha doll that she's a doll of the show right now. She is reliable always on time. What are you talking about? A dog? No, she's unbelievable. She's unbelievable. Seriously, I Kelly are the best. and I'm hoping that you know We get to go out and see her when I do comedy. She might be she might be a cum with us

So this is really awesome, so we'll see what happens, but Kelly. What do you got? Can I Kelly for still go? Yeah? Kelly for still get what else? I got my website kelpsdegut.com and also the podcast handles the WKWD Podcast at Facebook like the page we just we just 800, so I want to get 2,000. And then the Twitter one as well, we get all the photos and the videos and the fucking what, dude. There you go. Yeah, if you follow me, make sure you follow,

you know what, dude, because I don't read, I, the rights, I don't retweet everything from there because I want you guys over there. There's stuff that we do over, you know what, dude, at, you know what, do podcasts, that you're not going to get at my Twitter. Everything, all the the photos all the links Yeah, go to Facebook and Twitter go there. It's on what's that and send in presents

sending gifts we got a new we got new gifts coming in next week that I'm gonna talk about Oops, I can be addressed again six seven six eight not avenue number 44 New York New York one zero zero three six Send us some stuff. That's fun. I love getting stuff. Yeah, this is Rob from Glory Hall. Hey, Rob's friends. Hang on, let's see what he, hey Rob. Good, hey. Hey, buddy, it's Rob. Hey, yeah, you're on this, what we're doing

the podcast right now? What's up, dude? Hey, what's going on, guys? Hey, Rob. Hi, Rob. How are you? I'm doing good. I was calling you to be a bit of a fan. Anyways, I, um, you guys, How are you?

Anyways, I You guys will see it next week. Bye You know what it is I'm stuck in the water, I'm stuck in the water You know what it is I'm stuck in the water, I'm stuck in the water You know what it is Really, really, really, really You know what it is Don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face, don't stop filming my face. Don't stop filming my face. Don't stop.