Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Liza Colby | Tarzan of NYC

Episode Date: November 9, 2020

Our guest this week is Liza Colby, the amazing rockstar from Liza Colby Sound and Susu comes on to tell us how the pandemic affected her tour, how Europes music scene differs from the U.S. and living in Manhattan during the protests! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hoy es un día de eso de no saber cómo va a acabar el día. Donde nadie pregunta, ¿dónde viene? Si no, ¿por qué no te viene? Y una ronda es el tiempo que pasa entre no conocernos y no creer olvida. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos lia. Hoy es un día de eso que Madrid nos encuentra. Maú, la vida es más vida cuando nos encontramos.

Encuentra los bares de Madrid, la Dición Especial de Madrid nos lia. Un lumena que de número más que de Madrid. Podcasts! I'm the back! Who I can't do podcasts? Why can't I do these back again? Old school, back in the day, We're all starting before them all! I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm the back, I'm This is an NPR. That's the part that does. Is there any better show? This is the original version. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure.

I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. Now what dude? Dude, your fucking podcast has been around for a long time, dude.

Listen, we're back, fucking Monday. You know what, dude, podcast. I'm gonna shed, I'm freezing my fucking twat off. Cause I'm in a shed. It's like five below out. The fucking windie is shit. The leaves are all falling. The summer's over.

The fucking pandemics kicking back and we're shutting down the city and the world's about to turn over again. They're gonna like the shit on fire and you know what? We're still doing this goddamn podcast, dammit. And we're still here. We're not gonna talk about any horse shit today. We're gonna have a lot of fun and I get one of my favorite people of all time ever today

lies a cold maze here what's up I mean, Gabby's here, mushosh is in the background mush. How are you? I'm doing great. We got the ladybugs watching J.C. Greg, Lulu, Greg Shepard, Bobby, how are you? John Stanley, we got a fucking Terry Tyler, ultimate reject. We got a bunch of fucks watching live, J.C.s here.

What's up? How are you? Now, I know Gabby's fucking losing her mind because we finally have a Vag Heavishow. I always love a Vag Heavishow. I love a Vag that's heavy. I like a heavy Vag. Big fat Vag.

I'm not. It's the Vagis. It's a Vag Heavishow badge and I really do have a sweet ass pussy Your and those what is fucking what is he like? So listen, we're fucking I wanted to have you on first of all I love you so much I love you so much and I love you so much. And I've missed you. And I, you know, this whole thing, we've been talking how it affects comics, comics, comics, comics, comics.

But it's affected music industry. So fucking bad. Now look, of course we know Gabby's dad fucking massive. She's an indiderate like 20 billion dollars. 20 billion. Gabby I want to be your sugar baby. Okay you could be my sugar baby. I just want to be a fucking dude in the room for that.

I'll pay 30 dollars a week just to be a dude in the room. Well 30 dollars a week? Yes be a dude in the room. Oh, $30 a week? Yes. That's not enough. Wow. Why are you on fucking, you're going to be married $80 billion. Why is it going up? $80 billion?

I don't know. It's funny when it goes up. That's why. Listen, hey here. You want to know something crazy? What? I just found out the moment this podcast started that I do actually have corona virus.

What? I got my results. I got a rapid test this morning and I just got my results and I actually have corona virus. You have it, so you never got it from your parents or anybody. No, I got it now. I just got it. And parents or anybody. No, I got it. No, I just got it. And you're sick.

No, I feel fine. You sound sick. I, I, while I'm stuffed. Yeah, that's sick. This is, this is, can I just say what I hate about your generation? This is what sucks about you, you're just, I say you sick. I, I have the coronavirus. Are you sick?

No, I'm fine. You sound sick. I'm just stuffed up. Stuffed up you sick. I have the coronavirus. Are you sick? No, I'm fine. You sound sick. I'm just stuffed up. Stuffed up to sick. Well, I was outside all morning waiting in line for my COVID test. And now I'm panicking. Do I have a fever?

I can't tell. Should I take my temperature right now? Yes, take your time. If you fucking, oh, please don't die. This would suck. This would be the great, this episode would be so popular. I'm a thermometer. I feel like I've an owned a thermometer maybe ever.

That's because you're rocking roll, baby. Take your temperature to show tonight. I'm a true. I feel like we're doing the show. That's right. Now listen, let me, are you okay? Yeah. What's the thermometer say? What's your time? It hasn't beeped yet. That's cause you're dead inside.

So listen, let me ask you a question there girl. You, you, you tore like me. Like you fucking tore like me. You're a road dog. You're out there, but you do the world. Like you're going everywhere. You're going all over the world Tor on these clubs and you're fucking kicking ass Your tour was kicking off this year you had an album come out last year correct Yeah, I started I had an album come out last year and I started in New Band I

Started in New Band in September of 2019 and I was in on tour in Europe with my new band, Susu. Why do you call it? What is it called? Susu, S-U-S-U. It's like gossip. What is that? What is Susu? Susu is a western Jamaican term that means gossip. It's like an exchange of information. People are talking about it. And my best friend and I started it together, Keel Warrant, she had a band in New York City, too, for a long time, called Revolendines. And we had done this super group a few times where her band and my band got together.

We did it at like, Webster Hall, Surf Lodge, Grammar C. Parcoteau at the Rose Bar. And the two of us are like, man, I fucking, I really like, I love, yeah, there, I fucking I really like I love yeah there it is. I'm like I love playing with you. What can we do this together? So we started our own band, Susu, and we were have left February like 27th, I think, to go on a five week long European tour. And then the pandemic, that picture, we were in, I feel like we're in Germany or something. And the lobby of this weird hotel was so awesome.

There were all these plants. We were taking all these photos late at night and the guy who smelled like, kind of like chicken noodle soup with onion crunchies. Oh my God, he was kind of nice. He like helped us with our laundry was very upset that we were allowed at night taking photos in the lobby.

I was following your Celter reviews throughout Europe. Oh, that was with Alec, oh yeah. So this is, that's the new band, but we have like, I mean, we really, in true, the way Ken, I always do everything is like, it's, we really in true the way, can I always do everything is like it's we're just throwing shit up against the wall. Ilegal mess. Now they're a local mess. I was going to tell you really quick that Gabby wants to bang all

will bang all three of those guys. Oh, I'll bring those dudes are right up her alley. Set me up. Okay. I'll tell all the dry clean only boys. I'm going to tell them right up her alley. Set me up. Okay. I'll tell all the dry clean only boys. I'm gonna tell them. Right up her alley. Tattoos probably haven't showered in a couple of days. Yes. I don't know what's wrong.

They do smell really good. They smell all of them fantastic. Like the best one. I'm serious. Like I walk up on Tori. You're like, why do you smell so good? I'll let it slide. I want to pick right now. I want to pick the, I'm gonna pick and then Gabby, you're like, why do you smell so good? I'll let you slide. I want to pick right now.

I want to pick the, I'm going to pick and then Gabby, you can pick. I'm saying that the guy in the back is the drummer. The guy over to the right, league guitarist and to the left is bass. You fucking nailed it. Oh my God. How would you know that?

Because I know, because the drummer's in the back just show a little bit because Jummers are always a little chubby or a little out of shape the league guitarist is always fucking rock in the cool haircut and the Yeah, yeah, look at them exactly look at that look at that confidence in that league guitarist Now what made you what what happened to all the other band? What happened to your... Nothing happened. We went on, nothing happened. We went on a tour.

We went on that last tour to Europe. I was on the road so much in 2019 and then right before, that was in October, right before I went, Kia and I had this opportunity from Ilegal, Mascow. They're like, we love what you guys did with Rebelsound. Let's do a record and we were like, could we do it with us? Like we've been really wanting to do a project. So we went to Fort Worth. We recorded a five song EP and then a strange turn of events

happened where we had an opportunity like Kia was like, fuck, they're these dates. My band can't make it. What if I pitch Susu? This was pre-us going to record the record. We had an opportunity, like Kia was like fuck, they're these dates, my band can't make it. What if I pitched Susu? This was Priya's going to record the record. And I was like, yeah, I guess I'll pitch it. The thing was, I was like, we don't have, you're pitching us for a tour and we don't have

a song. But we're like, whatever, sure, let's do it. So we recorded five songs sets in Europe for 90 fucking minutes. Five songs is like 30 minutes What the fuck did you do what did you do we just scramble no hang on what's that? Do not fucking double ask my question? Well, I was asking at the same time person no, I asked it and then What did you do go ahead gab you victim? What did you do? Go ahead, Gab. Ask again.

What did you do? We are, I don't know. We're like crazy. The two of us, Kia is like, it's always like, do you think we can and the other persons like we can and we should also. So both of us are on the on the road until the end of 2019. So we didn't even get in the room with that band until mid-January. We had our first show ever, Valentine's Day at Berlin, which was just like, fuck, we have to play at least one show. We have to just play a show before we go on tour. It was like 35 minutes, but we had never,

not only have we never played the 90, we didn't have 90 minutes. Until the first day of tour, we played 90 minutes. Didn't you, did you talk in between? Did you pull a fucking David Lee Roth and fell a fucking story in between? We ended up pulling out. We had 90 minutes of material just took a lot of us just being like, we're going to do

this. It's like anything with an artist. You're like, this is what has to be done. The tour is booked. You're not going to bag that. The funniest thing about the whole situation was just like, on that last slide, the Colby Sound tour, because it's the same booking agent. I'm going to these venues and they're going like,

oh God, we can't wait for the Susu stuff. Like, when are we gonna hear the music? And I'm like, I don't know, I can't wait for me to hear the music too. I'm so excited. And my booking agent's like, well, you have to have something like a live show. And I was like, we don't have it.

And then you just like, Kia, send something. And she's like, we have never played. There is no, nothing out. So they booked the whole tour on a photo of the two of us. Oh, really? Yeah, we were, it ended up being a bit in the show where we're like, sold, they were sold out shows. It was like a great fucking tour

until this fucking pandemic hit. So wait a minute. You're telling me that you had a sold out tour and a brand new band. We played two sold out shows and the rest of the shows were packed except for Hamburg, which made up for it not being packed because it was weird.

You just made me hungry, first of all. For Hamburg. Just Hamburg. Yes, who's that? Wait a minute. I want to, listen. I am a fucking investigator and I just saw some some sexy dudes head or somebody Where is he wants to say hi to you so very there he is

Hi, blah blah look at him. Sure list. You want to talk about the sexiest man That's fucking hard. Dan of New York City right there That's the fucking You want to talk about the sexiest man, that's fucking hard-hand of New York City right there. That's the fucking, that is the fucking hard-hand of fucking NYC right there. Just look at him, that's all push-ups and things are right there. He got COVID too.

Oh my God, am I gonna be shredded like that after a minute? Yes, that's what I said. You're gonna be so skinny, it's gonna be awesome. Okay, wait, you're gonna look just like him after. Oh my God, I'm gonna be shredded like that after. Yeah, that's what I said. You're gonna be so skinny, it's gonna be awesome. Okay, wait, you're gonna look just like him after. Oh my God, I'm gonna be a guy. Gabby, Gabby, that's her husband. Imagine that's what you want. That's what you want right there. You want a shirtless fucking Tarzan from New York City.

Look at her, we're long and that'd be awesome. Let me see him. No problem. Oh my God, you're a little money for that because we're not making money right now. So it just has'd be awesome. Let me see him. No problem. Yeah, oh my God. Could I give you a little money for that? Because we're not making money right now. So it just has to be it. OK, this is what's killing me is that you're like me. Everybody's like, oh, you're fine.

You're doing good. You're a successful blah, blah, blah. We're successful when we tour. We're on the road making the money. And you have it because not only do you have, you have to get paid, but you have you have to get paid but you have to pay For the people right? So when I do

At least three other because Kia and I are we're in the same When I get paid it's to me I pay me that's the That's a way better Business structure, you know. Yeah, I know. I know. I get to just play fucking God's Mac on the way up and then just tell some dick jokes and call it a day.

The only difference is when I leave stage, even though I have less money, I get a little bit of camaraderie. Yeah, I get nobody. Yes, that's it. I get to hang out of camaraderie. Yeah, I get nobody. Yes, that's it. I get to hang out with mush. Yes. Which is not bad mush. Don't get mad in the show.

Don't get mad. Let's just not, you know, say, what do you want to do? I don't care. Do I get something to eat? Sure. You have a good time? Yeah, it was fun. All right, I'm going to leave.

OK, I'm going to kill the hooker. Listen. Yes. So when this all went away Because the the music industry people don't understand Comedy clubs can section people out can put tables when people go see you. They're standing shoulder to shoulder They're right up on the stage. I mean it is a fucking this is You know a very close fucking, this is a very close person to person environment that you're, I mean, that spit sweat, fucking blood sweat and tears is going on at your shows.

Yeah, I don't understand why that wouldn't be like permitted during this whole pandemic. It's, that's all the boxes for being safe. I mean, when do you see it? I mean, because you know, the funny thing is it's like, I mean, when do you see it? I don't know. I mean, because you know the funny thing is, it's like, I mean, the parallel lines, that comedy and music run, right? Because it's like, even though you can space out the people, it's not the same feeling as like, if either musicians

or comedians are playing with these sold out fucking rooms. If they're big or small, it doesn't fucking matter. You don't care, I don't care. I'll play a fucking tiny ass little place. If it's fucking, you want it just to be packed out. What's crazy, I think, is all the artists, musicians, comedians already felt how tough it was in this states because there's not a fucking infrastructure for us here.

So you're grinding this shit as hard as you can grind it. And in Europe, it makes it, it's easier. It's easier to fucking tour out there. They just take care of you. Why? Why? I don't know. Wait, stop.

One second. Stop. Exactly. It came out. It second. Stop. It just came out. It came out. It's a natural question to ask. Wait. Yeah, that's why I'm asking it. Robert Kelly's, you know what, dude.

Not Robert Kelly's and Gabby. She'll ask the same exact question he does. At least put a twist on it. Yeah, that's true. Why is that? Don't you say the same thing I'm saying? What do you want from me? I want you to not ask the same question I'm asking. How am I going to know that until it comes out of both of our mouths at the same time? Gabby, I swear to God if I was near you right now, I'd kick you right in your shin. I'd cough right in your face. Oh

That's murder. That's murder. That's fucking murder. I am actually in the bracket. Oh, you that's murder. That's murder. That's fucking murder. I am actually in the bracket. I'm a little overweight and I smoke cigars. You can kill me. Yeah. Wow. Wow. Anyways, back to my original question. Why? Why is it different in Europe? I honestly feel like built in their situation or whatever. They're, I don't know if you want, it's like they just have money to support the arts. They give you, they give you a room to say and they give you food. They promote the shows. You don't have to fucking do it.

They're like just better. You know, you know, no name towns in Europe. I feel, you know what it is. I think in the US, it's like a ticket buying culture. So if they know about you, people will buy the ticket and do it. But if they don't, then you're kind of asked out, but then how are you getting those reps? You know, how are you building your tops in Europe? Like in the middle of nowhere. And they're like, thank you so much for coming. Like, you know, like, oh, no problem. I just want to play all the time like you know and

It's just and they pay you they give you they make money in your I'm gonna guarantee you get a fucking hot meal and a place to stay you're like what the fuck? Yeah, because what happens and what I'm really getting fed up with is that the promoters or the comedy clubs Now that you have this social media, they're all on you. Hey, can you tweet more? We're not selling. How about you buy?

How about you spend some of your fucking money and take out an ad, take out some, you're own, get a social media person and build up your network in your area within 200 miles. So when I roll the fucking into town, you hit a button and your mailing list goes out and you fill the room every goddamn week with people that would like me or fans that have liked me already. And they put it not only we promoters

in this fucking country, and I'm saying this country, like I've been out of the country, now you've told me what it's like because I'm a fucking assimilating cocksucker. But it really is. It's like you do something all on us. You go how much I mean, and it's a slow thing because I feel like it doesn't seem like it's always been this way. You know what I mean? Like they're

seem like when you talk to fucking people, it's like, yeah, like I played like 200 gigs of night and Connecticut in the 70s. And I'm like, I'm from Connecticut. What the fuck, what clubs are you playing? 200 nights in your air in Connecticut? And over there, the clubs are there. People are going out. I don't know. Now, it's crazy. It's like, how do you do that? How do you have to be the promoter?

How do you fucking write your material? How do you fucking stay healthy? How do you go on the road? How do you do social media bullshit? How do you have to be the promoter? How do you fucking write your material? How do you fucking stay healthy? How do you go on the road? How do you do social media bullshit? Have a light.

And then have the pandemic come and then them live. Why, wipe it all the fuck away. You know what this means? 2020 was shaping up to be amazing. The best. I've worked my own life for this year. You don't even understand what, this year for me,

I would, I say it every week and I feel I'm echoing, hang on, I have to un-echo, hang on, fuck me, sorry, mush. I ain't, no, it's me. It's not me. It's always me, even if it's not me, much tells me it's me. You know what? What are you talking about? Because we would be at comics come home. Right now would be, oh, the comics come home. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. People don't know this set. Is that better? Much let me know. Yeah. People don't understand that. This year, we do the comments come home, Boston comedy, Cam Naley Foundation with Dennis

Leary, and we'd always get together. And I was lucky enough, which I thought I was only going to do one year, the first year. And then they had me back. And then I was like, okay, I'm on the show that he's doing. So I'll be back for those. But then when that ended, I was like, all right, that's it. This is my last year and then he just you know leery just ask me back here so I'm like fucking freaked out That every year he's like dude. He literally calls me after the show like that week. All right. See you next year, right? And I'm like yeah fuck

Yeah, I'll fucking done and We do this show, but the band, they have a band behind us. And in your, the fucking, one of the lead singers in the band, like. I'm a backup singer for the... Yeah, whatever. Let's call it how it is, but it's a blast. And I fucking, I'm sad.

These are all like, those are like your, these are some of the things I look forward to all year. Seriously, like, I love it. It's the fucking best. It's crazy right now. I mean, like, why are we going to be in arenas again? Where, bro? Oh my God.

I don't know, dude. I mean, why are we going to be in arenas? But why are we going to be in the small theaters? Oh, I would, you know, there was a point in the pandemic. I feel like I'm in an emotional roller coaster all the time. Like, you know, like, I'll be like peaking and then just down. But like, I was like, I would chill to play for a fucking the, the, the porter and the bartender right now. I'll play to an empty room. I just want somebody that I don't know to look at me sing.

Yeah, because you we can't, we can't get acting. My husband and my dog. Have you done any outdoor shows like what's going on with outdoor stuff for our musicians? Good question, Gabby. I didn't ask it. It was an original question. It was an original question from the hey-haired fucking L first self. Hi.

I didn't do an outdoor show. You didn't do any outdoor shows all from along. None. Why? I don't know. She was so weird out here this summer. It didn't really feel like that. I mean, I've been busy.

Kean and I did get back in as soon as we could. And it started like loosening a little. We got in the studio, recorded the full length record of all the songs from the rest of the 90 minutes. And we've been mixing that. and we've filmed a couple video, we've shot a video for every song, like we did seven songs that weren't on the 11 we just recorded so we've been doing videos and we're busy but we just haven't been fucking like doing a bunch of, I guess I performed once in LA with her on her porch for a top-head thing.

Yeah, because it was Tom's petty-sport day. 70, it would have been 70. But I don't know, we haven't been playing, like, I don't know. So okay, so what the fuck is going to happen to live music? And if you look at the cafe, Wah, the groove, all the places, the blue note, even where the comedy seller was. And I just got the thing today, the governor just said, I can't fucking believe this shit.

This is like, this is a third fucking world situation, what's happened. And now he is shutting down, this is a mandatory fucking thing. You ready for this shit? Oh my God. Are you ready? We have to. Where is it? Where the fuck is it?

You piece of shit. Of course, when I wanted it's not there. Mother fuck here it is. I got it. Don't you fret. Here we go. Boom bang and gush and gush. And gush.

Ready? Stay at home advisory for everyone in New York. 10 PM to 5 AM.m. All indoor recreations theaters casinos need to be closed at 9.30 p.m. Restaurants can do takeout past 9.30 p.m. gathering inside your fucking home limited to 10 people and done by 9.30 p.m. We just got this. Listen, that means at your house,

if you have more than 10 people, yeah, you're gonna get fucked, you can get fined or arrested. And at 9.30 you're gonna tell them to go home. So now, guess what? I don't know who, I mean, I'm not in that fucking place. I can't have 10 people in my apartment. My apartment is too fucking raw. So that's not a problem for me. You know, I'm not in that body. I thought it like what did you say? What? is why they have to do those kind of things. Why? Because all these people trying to run shows out of

their apartment are having 30 people in their apartment and people having like they're making their impromptu nightclub that's shit like that. So because they're doing that and then putting it online that that shit's happening. I'm sorry fucking captain Nazi. I didn't know you sound like you're there. You're on that side mush. Yeah. Well, I'm playing these people need you not to put their shit out there like that. Keep it secret the way you're supposed to. And then we won't have these dumb rolls. But on us, that's got them right. All right. That's better. That's better mush. I like that. He came in a little, a little teacherish. Well, these, because you're not supposed to have 30 people. Yeah. Well, kids, I don't, I don't get this. That means that 930 you can't be, you have to be home. Well, here's my question. Oh, can't you get COVID before 930?

Why 930? I they want 930. They want people at home. I think it's probably because of what's about to happen and I do not want to talk about it I don't want to talk about what's a I don't give a fuck it's going to happen and I don't care about I am not talking about The election or any of that thing. It's like Voldemort the name we can't talk about it and and I'm not that that's about to happen So I think they boarded up macy's today. So they're just assuming that the fucking they're going to rip the town apart no matter what. And the, the norm now, the norm is to just board up stores like a hurricane's coming because we can't control ourselves as fucking adults and not burn down fucking places. If we don't, if it doesn't go our way, either way, you know what, they're just gonna burn

down the fucking city. That's the norm now. And what's gonna happen is it's gonna get to the point where we keep fucking acting like children and they're gonna fucking slap us on the ass and that's gonna suck. I mean protest fucking take your titties out fucking tell people to go fuck themselves make a sign but stop lighting oh it's fucking what's the lighting shit on fire what was the titties part what's lighting I just I just think or though I just like when I mean we like to get to we went right around from Union Square when that shit was going and I feel like there was no other way

Then for it to be that crazy back what I think I feel like we're okay, we don't want to talk about it We we don't have to but I'm just saying I think that Yeah, it cuz you're rock and roll you're fucking rock and roll and you're fucking I get it you punk rock I'm also it's like I'm a woman. I'm a woman of color I see how fucking COVID has affected all of these minorities everywhere We're going into a possible another four years. It's like shit is ripe and ready and people are Yes, but look at that white girl down there. She has COVID too. So she her life matters. Listen, and I'm pretty sure I'm pretty sure mush. Our producer has had COVID from

in 1988 from 1995. He said COVID. He has the symptoms. Huh? I'm tired. Nothing. All right. Next I can hear that joke bombed. Listen, they're not all good. Listen, I don't I get it. I'm tired. Nothing. All right, next talk of you. That joke bombed. Listen, they're not all good. Listen, I don't, I get it. I get it, but here's the thing. You did it. You done. Stop ripping shit apart. We get to find another way because we all have to be united.

And yeah, but then we have to we have to change shit. Yes, it's a mad place. Yeah, but the one thing we should be worried about, that they're boarding up are a lot of them are all okay with a lot of fucking money and they're the ones who are getting help. No, it's a matter because the people that work there, the people that work there don't have money.

The people that, don't, well, people, they don't then, then again, we still have to work this as a systematic thing. Why, we're talking about the arts before like what's gonna happen to Clubs right after this like what's gonna? Yes, what's gonna happen to Everybody if the economy keeps being set up like this. What do you mean? you have a

Huge disparity between rich and fucking poor absolutely absolutely. Growing and growing and growing. And what happens right now after the fucking havoc that is happening from the pandemic and from our incompetent president, what the fuck is going to happen with people actually being able to support themselves and to live. I mean, what is so crazy? We were just talking about this, Gabby. People are leaving New York City and talking like, right? Like half an eye when the pandemic first hit and it's

getting worse, but you're looking around and it's like, you're seeing like newly homeless people. It's why you're, how many homeless people are on the straight right now. This is one of the most Expensive cities to live in in the world. There are fucking buildings and people are leaving and there's homeless people What the fuck is wrong here? Listen listen here. Yeah, but this is not it's yeah, but the anger and the fuck use It's this this everybody This is not, yeah, but the anger and the fuck use, there's everybody. Yes, there's rich people, we have to take care of that. Yes, there's a big class difference.

Absolutely, there's a class difference. You know, I'm sitting there last night watching, you know what, I'm so, I understand that there's a racial thing going on all that. I understand that and that's cool, but I think class to me, because I'm not rich, I've never been rich, and I've never really dealt with I've been in jail, I've been fucking pulled over,

I've been fucking roughed up by the cops, I've been all this shit, right? And then I think that when you take care of the class situation and you bring kind of every from buddy from the bottom up a little bit and give them a little bit I think that we're all gonna fucking be better for it right. You put a race in class or intertwined. Okay fine but but when you make it black and white you fucking okay then you're gonna you're gonna cut a bunch of people we should all be together on every but the problem is this country was not founded in a way that we are all together and yeah but yeah but if it was founded fucking hundreds of years ago we're right here right now but we're

right here right now but people but people are still carrying those same fucking ideals it's why the majority of people aren't and we're all on this and the thing COVID We should be all together Trying to fucking work together in COVID to find a way to keep people alive Fed and float right for sure right absolutely Fed and float right for sure right absolutely because tomorrow. Let's be honest tomorrow Oh, we we get a vaccine and we're all back to normal right and You you're fucking thing takes off and you're winning you and and susu women Emmy next year You're on a hold and fucking six Emmys right and you hold you got millions and I'm fucking I'm on an HBO thing

And I think and Gabby's making films and she's a director All fucking millionaires. Let me tell you we're not gonna be living We're gonna be living up in Beverly Hills with those fucking cocks up But that's the thing we're gonna be we're gonna have money and are you gonna want to are you gonna sell one of your homes? Because most of the people that we're friends with, most of the people that have fucking money, we're talking about them too. So you can't, well you have it, wait a minute,

we're all trying to be fucking millionaires. But you're trying to be a millionaire. I'm trying to, I'm trying to fucking be, fuck you money. I'm trying to, if someone said to me tomorrow, let's go, you're the next motherfucker. I would, this is the difference.

I don't give a fuck about having money like that as much as I care about making and I really mean this about leveling this fucking playing field so people can have an opportunity because I just looking like I'm a light skinned black woman. I am a high yellow mother fucker. I am like, you're like, that gets me in light and privilege. But tell me what that means. Hi, yo, I'm like, you am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, I am like, because of what's been happening for years. COVID has disproportionately affected Black, brown, and poor people because our fucking health situation, our healthcare situation is a nightmare.

So for me, do I want, I would like, I don't want to money so I could have a fucking mansion. I'd like money to have the option where it's like, yeah, I want to make sure that I could fucking go to the doctor I want to go to instead of having Medicare because I'm a broke fucking artist that doesn't have shit. I would like people to have the opportunity Yes, homes have a roof over their heads. Yes, they have good education And I would like that to be leveled and I would like that to be leveled. But who nobody doesn't want that, who doesn't want that.

All the white people have been told they've been better than black people. Oh, stop it. There are a lot of people who say they don't want that and they vote that way. I'm not. Listen, if you want to say. I just don't understand why every, like there's this.

Wagabba, you're white, you can't talk. OK. I don't understand why there's there's this. Like Gabby, you're white, you can't talk. Okay. I don't understand why there's this assumption that every rich person is a Republican where they're met, like if it was all about money, then why are there rich Democrats? There is no assumption that there's most famous people that have money are Democrats,

and that's what's so condescending and hypocritical is that these people are making these videos talking to people, and've got three houses. You've got a lake house too. You've got all this fucking money. You can take that money and give it to the people. You don't need 27 bedrooms. But they're not going to do it without somebody. There has to be a regular. They're not going to do it anyways. They're not doing it anyway. We're gonna be in this fucking nightmare for a lot.

Oh, yes. We're gonna be in this nightmare for a lot longer. We're not gonna be in this night. I'm serious. This is the way. Here's the other thing too. Like I voted, I've already done, early voted, fucking, and I voted for fucking Biden and Kamala.

The problem is this the Democrats for years also we're fucking shitting on the poor too. And we're not. I'm sorry does evil. They're all evil. Thing. Number one, we have to get Trump out of office. But aside from that, we need to really restructure this shit so that people in our country have a better shot. Like why can't that's like you create stuff you fucking have a shot.

Here's the thing this is this is the problem you as soon as you bring this shit up everybody flips the fuck out okay and I understand it but here's the thing tomorrow is gonna happen no matter what and whatever is gonna happen is gonna happen no matter what and whatever is going to happen is going to happen no matter what and whatever if it goes Biden and Kamala you're going to have to deal with it everybody's going to have to deal with it and move the fuck on and if it goes Trump you're going to have to fucking deal with it and move the fuck on because that's the thing we're out a place you can't just have no choice. It's no choice. You have to move on. Yeah, there is you can you can fucking burn down and kill jobs and divide people. Kill jobs. Kill jobs. When you fucking burn.

Well, let me say something. Let me say something below you fucking hippies. When you fucking burn down a business, the out of care if it's one person that worked there They don't have the money to bring home to their fucking wife or husband to feed their baby They had a job whether it's macy's or a Dunkin Donuts or a Best Buy the people that work inside there the Rich people never step in foot inside those places. But the poor people do. They're the ones that are getting paid minimum wage to work at counter to let you know if you're fucking dress fits all right or if you're done, if you're coffees the way you want it. Those are the fucking people that make mine. So my eyes.

First, let me say this. Let me see this. Does it? Is it horrible for us for somebody's business to be vandalized in unites have it? Yes, but the majority of if you're talking about places that are getting fucked up from rioting versus the rest of the fucking economic crisis poor people black and brown. Yeah, but what are you? What are you accomplished? What are you accomplished? Let me let me I want to know what you accomplished by burning down businesses. Tell me what it is Nobody right now. I just want to know what it is in one sentence by burning down and looting and fucking in one sentence by burning down and looting and fucking looting is what does it do? I'm asking that question is making it black and white. I think what's happening is you got people to a boiling point and they were in a place,

especially this time, especially this time during the pandemic, where you're at home, you're inside, you have no fucking, just I just want to know what it does. Now, you need to know. You need people to know that this is serious, because before when we're doing black, black, matter and everything, nobody's listening. Are you crazy? Everybody's listening.

But what does it do? Now that we've done it already, we've burnt the businesses, we've looted the plate. What did it do? How did it, I just want to know what it would do. Look at the global movement. Everybody in the world is fucking going like we have got to make a change. What did it do? What did it do? Like what does it do? People are changing and people are fighting. People

are waking up. I think I think I think I think I don't know. I mean, you can shake a fucking stick hat. I don't think it just insights. I think it is what I think what it does is that, okay, this happens, that happens and it and it maybe it wakes people up at some point. But if you keep doing it and you keep and it becomes our norm where if a group of people don't get what they want, whether it be the group that you agree with or the group you fucking despise, right? Because now it's becoming what people do.

Let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me,

let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me, let me You're mom and dad raised you with values. You're mom and dad raised you to be a certain person You're those are the things that you should be passing on to other human beings love courtesy Friendship those are the things that we should be fucking back But everybody believes that Bobby and it doesn't most people do not know Absolutely people do. Not more than that. Not at all. Absolutely. I accidentally had sex with a Republican last week. And. No, you're such a hoe.

I swear. And I was in Nashville all last week. And I have to say, not everyone has those values. And I actually. I'm a Republican. Yes. All right. I hope that's where you got COVID.

I definitely. And I hope you're pregnant. I hope you. But he had abs. So I was. I hope you get pregnant. I hope want 100% COVID, but he had abs. So I was, I hope you get pregnant. I hope you get pregnant. What is wrong with you? I hope you have a little Trump baby.

You hope I have a Trump baby. You think I would even pull my pants up on the white up land, Barrett would? I hope I hope I hope you have to, I hope you have to murder a Trump baby. Absolutely. Listen, listen. I will hold your hand. Listen. I'm in there.

I'm the first person I'm calling. I'll go there with you. I just can't. I'm going to get a killer. You can tell your story just to pause on the politics for a second, because the comments are freaking out. Well, because this is the problem is that this is the problem. I got what you let me tell a fucking story.

So actually, so I'm flirting with a guy a hot Republican guy Unfortunately, they also come in hot in Nashville and I went back to his house to go have sex with him And I walked into his bedroom and there was a loaded Pistol on his nightstand. What's wrong with that? I Mean no, I mean what what the fuck is this is listen You have I was wrong with that come on Let's put that away. What if you run a skin with her? It's not a lot you

My best friend Gabby shut the fuck up for a second my best friend Mike halta Pitch me up in the car in Florida with a loaded hand gun on the seat I go dude can you move that please? I don't fucking do that. I don't have a fucking loaded gun in my seat for my Mike my best friend Mike does. I don't I don't give a fuck because you don't like it. Don't make it wrong. I don't know. You don't have to depend that that's a dumb thing to do if you're a gun owner. You don't leave your gun unattended on the lot. You're done.

You're just going to get the gun exploded at all times. I fully. If you have a gun, it's supposed to be loaded. Look at your husband in the mirror behind you. It's like pouring over here. Let me see him. And you're welcome. Can we let me see him one more time?

Please politics is just please see him strikingly hot husband with his abs in the corner. Just. Can I please? Can I see him? I'm not gonna hand to God. Yeah, be shut the fuck up.

Let me see your husband. Please. Let me see. You are being summoned. Let me see him. Look, I think it it's all calm down and let's hear what we'll save the world. There it is. That will that's what we remember this for a film. This is good. This is a beautiful dot. It's so beautiful. It's so arty. Look at that. It's almost like I'm day dreaming and if I could have a husband, he would look like.

day dreaming and if I could have a husband he would look like. What's a dog? My lord, will you take a photo of that? God, look at him. And he doesn't, I bet he doesn't. He probably works out with the, uh, the fucking, the scaffolding in New York City, right? He just jumps up and does some curls and then does a push up on a fucking fire. Hide it and carry a homeless lady up the stairs at the four-trained, right?

On West 4th, I got ya. He wrote this like that, you know, listen to his message. All right, listen, enough with the politics, okay? What's gonna happen is gonna happen. No, I didn't, I brought it up and said we shouldn't talk about it. I'm sure talking about that thing. All I'm saying is this, Bobby, I fucking love you. And I love you.

I love you. And I think what's important is us all being able to seriously have the conversation. And if all of this, nothing else but allow us to have a conversation, that's important. Because people get weird. You and I talk all the time, and we say crazy shit. But we have made our life in this place

where you people are like, yeah, we can fucking make some crazy shit here But but where it's okay like this shit is fucking uncomfortable and it makes a soul have to check shit in themselves And I understand that but the thing is we can talk and for change to happen it gets weird It gets weird. We all know anything changes Right, I will never I will never understand what, you know, look, I get that I'm not black, right? Yes. And I get that I'm a white dude from Boston.

Yes. But I also, it doesn't have some type. Or an Eskimo, yes, my might be half, you right, might appreciate your input. I might be Eskimo, somewhere, somebody fucking in. And from that by the end of this. Yes, somebody in my family fucking in you it on the way over here from Russia.

You are a great fisherman. But listen, what I'm saying is this, is that you know what I, I was watching a Denzel movie last night, the equalizer, okay? And I'm sitting there going, I love every fucking, I love this movie. I love fucking Denzel Washington. I think he's probably one of my top three actors and I love this movie, right? I love it.

And I love Denzel. And it's because it's not a black movie, it's not a white movie, it's not like there's no, they're not clubbing me over the head with this is what he is, he's just fucking Denzel, he's a guy in that movie playing that character and I can just get lost and enjoy this movie and not think black, white, woman, nothing. Like there's no bullshit in it. It's just an awesome movie with this awesome actor and I love him. And it's just a fucking movie.

You know, it's like superheroes. When you start like black Panther was a fucking great superhero, right? I enjoyed the whole thing. And it's like now they have black batwoman. It's like she's black. She has an afro. It's like stop telling me this shit. I Don't be so many of us have in like I get that I get being able to watch a movie and I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know Oh, no, I'm just kidding. He went before me, but I thought that was a really cool thing that he wants to sing. No way, no way you're Denzel. What is it?

I think that, why does this make people uncomfortable now if they're getting beat and over the head or have to think about these things? Like, Gabby and I are women. Do you know how many times I'm sure Gabby is having to? That I fucking walked into a club on a bill with all fucking dudes who fucking were just like this, giving me this bitch is not going to be able to fucking say I don't give a fuck

like, and you're like, it's because I'm a woman. I'm watching how you treat all these other dudes that you've never met before and you talk to them so nice. And I want to ask you a question. I want to know, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, and asked this girl at the comedy cell in a podcast when black woman, he was getting accused of not having enough black women, not having enough women, not having enough gays. Yeah. And I believe this is to you too. He said, would you rather be in here

because you're black, you're a woman or because you're good, because you're funny. She cuts your good, I agree with that. And she went, because I'm good, he goes good, because that's why you're good because you're funny. She's good. And she went because I'm good. He goes, good, because that's why you hear. I don't care if you're black, you have a vagina, you like men's dicks in your mouth. You're here because you're fucking great. That's it.

And that's why you're in that venue because you're a fucking the shit. And we're going on stage. When you were on stage that night, right? When you were on stage that night, right? Yeah. I guarantee all those fuckheads that treated you whatever will like, oh fuck. Yeah.

Where are all the other great women that are also coming? Has you done what that was? Like how do you put that? But you put those fuckers. You change their mind with what you do. But how do you get the child? Why do I? I get it.

Because so many people don't get to even get the fucking chance. Like there are so many things when I start taking off how my life went that I'm like, oh yeah, this is what got me the fucking foot in the door. And so many people don't even have like from a fundamental level, I'm not even talking to arts like from like literally just such a basic level, you don't even have whatever the education, you don't have the like, you don't have the pick, you don't have to pick anything. Okay, in the commenty, Gabby, in comedy, you think that there's more women in comedy

that's ever been. That's more women in comedy, success, whether there's ever been. So what happened? It's not, it's amazingly better, not better. It's not fucking amazing. You're asking me a question, Do you want me to answer it? I'm okay. Good answer it. So it's definitely better. You're gonna answer it.

You're gonna answer it. Mother fucking shit. It's better than it's always been. Sure, but it's still not equal. I'm still on all male lineups. All the fucking time. When I first started comedy, which was five years ago, which is nothing compared to how long you've been doing it. Yes. Like, I was the only girl on every fucking show. And now it's like maybe two girls to six guys.

Okay, but three girls, unless it's a all female show, and then it's very purposeful, but it's still not. It's also, you know what the, Gabby, I wanna have. How many women are doing comedy now? More women are doing it? Sure, it's getting better. Yes, it's getting better. So, why is that never in the fucking context of anything? No, no, it is. 100%. This is, yes, everything, things are incrementally getting better for sure. It's like, is the world safer now that it was in the 1900s? Yeah, yes Definitely, yeah, we're getting better everything's getting better. It's just not happening right this second We have to that's the way things change change things change in

It's time not our time. We want it right the fuck now and that's not the way things happen That's about it. If you look at where we were Five years ago with women in comedy opposed to that, it's better. And it's still getting better. If you look at comedy and minorities five years ago, it's hugely better. Same shit. Everything is getting better. Everybody's listening and everybody's fucking trying to change and try. Look, I don't know about rock and roll, but I know in my career.

Here's my other question, and I'm just trying, is it getting better or are we just seeing more numbers? Like, is it like really we're getting the cream of the crop of the women and of the minorities? I don't fucking know. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't like what I see too. What'd you say, huh? I agree with you because you do see more women, but they're picking women because it's a woman. They're not picking the best woman. And that would be, we got a woman. Can you shut up? I hope they're doing.

Stop, listen, here's the thing though, they're not doing that. They're picking the women that are available. There's not, you got to talk about guys have been doing stand-up comedy for fucking ever. Women have been doing it as more women have been doing it for less time. As more women do it, they get better. As they get better, you have a ton of funny women out there right now. They're ton of funny women. Jessica Kirshin, Miss Pat, Bonnie McFarlane. I mean, there's a fucking huge list of comic.

Because she got picked and Bonnie still doesn't have one, even though she's a way better comic. Who is Sarah who? Exactly. What did you say? Sarah Cooper. The TikTok chick. Yeah.

That's what we're talking about. That's interesting, that's what's happening. That's how we were just talking about, dude. That's what we're talking about. No, that's a TikTok chick. That's like Vine people got shows. We're talking about stand-up comedians

We're not talking about fucking you know chicken or You know people who fucking do some horseshit to get in you know, that's that's that's some that's a Only event to be this is where it gets a little squirrely, right because You man you can men have been doing comedy for a hundred stuff But you need to be around the best of the best to get fucking better. And if you're not, come here. I'd be great if she just hit her dog. She's an animal abuser. Listen, we all have to come together.

Around there are so many fucking like gay keepers doing this. I mean, here's an example for Susu for the new band. I've been playing rock and roll in your city for 10 fucking years. Kina was the only woman downtown that was doing something similar to what I was doing where I was like, oh, here's a contemporary that now is going to make me step my mother fucking shit up

because until I saw her, there was nobody doing what I was doing, which is not a way for you to get better as an artist. You can be fucking around, like there has to be other people. And women will always be doing it with men. You need it to have, you need that. You really fucking need it. Yeah, women need, but women need to step up and do it.

I mean, you can't, you can't just, you can't just, you can't wait, stop. You can't just say you need more women comics and then force women to become a stand up comics. They have to want to do it. And when they want it, when they wanted to do it and they said, look, this isn't fucking righteous. It's not fair.

And they brought, and it kind of got into the forefront of everything. Netflix, HBO, Comedy Central, the clubs. We're like, okay, let's fucking do it. FX, when they realize, hey, we don't have any women directors. We don't have any women writers. Fuck, let's do that. And then they changed it to fuck up.

And now it's, it's, it's, it's, it's coming. It's a whole time. That's the crazy shit. Yeah, but it's, yeah it's it's it's It's a whole time. That's the crazy shit. Yeah, but it's never you You're Oh Jesus Christ. Yeah, but you're looking back if you get a foot in yesterday a foot in the mario pissing all over today What's right in front of you right now? Wait go back the

Say the thing again listen what I'm saying is is that right now I believe For women for minorities whether people like it or not fuck off It's happening and people are stepping up people are getting the opportunities and stepping up and and and showing okay Cool, I mean how many fucking funny girls are there today? There's so many funny women that are murderers. Jessica Kurshin is a murderer on stage. I mean, fucking murders, miss Pat murders. It's not like, oh, she's funny.

It's like, I know guys that don't wanna follow them. Just like you. You understand? But it's they're the ones that were fucking putting in the time to become that like you, like you step on stage. Like I said it last week, I brought you up and Michael's like, oh, whatever. And I was like, dude, watch this. Mush brought up a clip of you. We watched it for fucking three minutes. And immediately he went holy shit. She's a bad.

Nobody's still said whatever before he saw it. Yeah, but yeah, okay. But who gives a fuck and that little question face you have on? It doesn't matter. She switched somebody's mind and changed the fucking world of somebody. But here's the thing.

I needed a stupid That fucking shit face. She already has a hurdle there, where if it was a guy, a hurdle, what enough in there to change someone's mind. But the fucking hurdle is gone. It's gone. You just, it's tipped it over for me. Thank you. No, but it's gone.

And that's how you get rid of them with fucking pure talent and people saying no fuck that check this out bam. You're right You got and it grows from that. Yeah, this is what this whole thing We want to look you want to keep looking in the past Gabby. You want to go. Yeah, but it was there It's not that just happened. That's it. It's fucking it is the past It's not. That just happened. That's what it's. It's fucking it is the past. It's it's gone. It's gone. That person and everybody else was like, wow, that's fucking awesome.

And that's what you want to do. That's what artists supposed to do. It's supposed to change people's minds, range people's fucking awareness, and make you go, fuck man. I just was witness to something I didn't know was possible Yes, and that's what our fucking jobs are not to sit here and bitch about shit It's about fucking I'm gonna show you I'm gonna show you Gabby your job

And I told you this all the fucking time stop hanging out in Brooklyn come to New York bomb and become a killer That's your job as a comic. Get on stage and fucking, oh, yeah, look at her, a tall blonde chick. She's gonna be corny. Get on stage, murder. Hey guys, bye. Good night.

Like Denzel it, Denzel it. And in about a vagina. I'm gonna go on stage and kill as a standup comic. Whether I have a badge, or you look at my hair, or I got nice tits, or I got fucking nice sexy lips that I always purse because they're so juicy and one of the comments things I got my lips done and I did not honey all that it doesn't fucking matter when you walk off stage and you're you just killed they're gonna go fucking dude shoot that was awesome that was awesome That happens all the fucking time, right?

And that happened last week. I love that that happened. I was like, you gotta check out last. She's the best. Dude, what? Brock and Roll, bum, bang. Woof, done. Amazing. And that's why I had you on the show. Because you are amazing. You fucking are probably one of the, I mean, I've never seen somebody, and I mean this, add rock and roll, like real fuck you punk rock. And rock star, lead fucking person and add sex, you're sexy, you're like, wow, just as a human being, you're looking at the crowd

and every, like a vampire type of, like I'm gonna fucking make every person in here Girl women men children old people want to fucking get up here and be with me right now and you murder it And then your voice is on point your band is a fucking killer and the show is just murderous and it makes you go wow It makes me as a person be like fuck that is the coolest shit I've ever seen And that that's a shit that I love You know what I love that about art. I feel like you're not even talking of it feels so long since I've done that It really feels like what is that who are we talking about but I really appreciate it because why is that I told you that I saw you Did I think I text you this that I saw you before we did the fat black interview thing

Where we actually was on a date on bowry and he was like oh my friends Band is playing we have to go see it and it was you Remember like after we met after the fat black it was you and I was like what the fuck Dear girl moment right now that I'm in This is a queer girl moment right now that I'm involved here. I'm fucking miss playing so much It's I feel like you must be like all of us are just dying. You just want to get on a stage Well, that's the thing that I care about most is that our fucking art I think that this coronavirus is I Feel like this to me is the most important thing and I feel like art. I feel like this to me is the most important thing.

And I feel like art, I feel like towns, restaurants, you forget that a restaurant is art. You forget that a chef was like, I want people to taste my food. Like you want people to hear your music and I want people to hear my jokes. Yeah. You forget that the store owner, the boutique lady,

was like, I want to sell these clothes because I love the all The stores they're all dying and it takes so much to push that rock up a hill Especially in Manhattan and they're all fucking dying and especially us We're the ones that make people forget about their shit lives. We're the ones that make people Go off into a fantasy land and have a great night and go home and go want to go back to their jobs and want to put up with the bullshit for the next five months or three weeks till they go to another show. We're the ones that put smiles on people's faces and we can't do that and not only can we not do that, the venues that we love so much are dying. You know, they don't open.

Heartbreaker. It's a fucking heartbreaker. Heartbreaker. These places are holding on, waiting for somebody to go, okay, you can open and they won't do it. And here's the worst part. We don't know what's the truth. Like I don't, I don't, to fucking anybody's matter. Did they not matter?

I don't know what the fuck's going on You know what I mean? So what are they saying for comics? Oh, when you guys when it looks like one is like a next Couture like what are people saying that you guys might be there? 2021 maybe Dude I talk to our European booking agent and they were like we might be looking at 2023 That's on the big artists are going back out. Yeah, you're going to. You're like maybe 2022, but it's looking like it's so, it's

bleep bleep. Your bothers me though, is that the big artists can wait. Yes. And we can't. You know what? Big artists can wait. You know what hurts so bad? This one's killing me.

Like, I was really stoked. Because even though we got sent home from the tour, we still got in a good, a little fucking chunk of that European tour. You know? Yeah. But like, what about the people who are about to have their first night on Broadway? What about these athletes? They're all there.

Yeah, that happened to my dad. The opening night was a week after quarantine. And everyone who was about to have their Broadway debut fucked. All those kids who were like, oh my god, my dream is happening. Yeah. Fuck athletes. Like where you're like, you're in your fucking prime. You're in your prime and you can't play the sports. Like, I mean, I have no sympathy for athletes. They're all doing, they're all getting their fucking million dollar paychecks and they're doing shows in front of you. I'm talking about like, what if you're in high school?

Like you just missed your college, like your prime mother fucking time, prime time. Like I mean, I'm just thinking like, you know, I'm stoked. It's like I was lucky enough to tour and to get, like get the time in to be on the fucking road and do this. But like, all the people who are just like, oh my god, like 2020, like we finally, and they don't like, and you're just like, oh, I might not for three years. And then are you going to be a musician? Are you going to be a comic and then are you gonna be a musician or are you gonna be a comic or are you gonna be an artist or you gonna be an inside. I'm working I'm gonna be making wood bowls in the Hampshire. Really? 12 wood bowls. You're gonna what? I learned how to roll a skate.

How you gonna roll a skate in the park for money? What are you gonna do for money if we can't put back? This is nothing to do with I have no fucking idea what to do for money. What are you going to do for money if we can't go back to do this? This is nothing to do with. I have no fucking idea what to do for money. I have to merge. We'll sell merch. Your merch is fucking off. Our record is coming out. Not lies of Colby Sound, but Susu. Yes, you can still buy lies of Colby Sound. Where's the Susu merch? Where's the Susu merch? Oh my god. We have vinyl. We have CDs. We have T-shirt. I could get it. You want them? Yeah, let me see it mush. Yeah mush. Will you get us do we have any Susu we can see on YouTube? Oh You can you can see Susu on YouTube?

We have pull up works on We did a Nina Simone Ted Nugent mashup. Oh my god. That's right. All right listen Oh my god, that's right. All right, listen. We, uh, I'm trying to fucking rile more people up. I'm like Ted Nugent, Nina Simone, what the fuck? All right, you guys ready? I'm, well, I'm gonna put it in the 10 minutes though because of music right now.

All right, so for the 10 minutes, we are going to, we're gonna play a little clip from Sousu. We're also gonna do, we're gonna talk about, uh, stand up comics, and we're gonna be talking about funny shit instead of getting these two fucking vaginas wound up about feminism. You did it. I didn't do it. Yes, I did.

That's your problem. See, look at, Liza's just laughing because she knows I'm joking. This little fucking millennial goes, you did it. That should be their fucking name for their whole cause. You did it to us, You've victim listen, Gabby She look at it. Oh, I'll fight with you right now. Let's find let's have it out. I'll fight you You didn't get that I'm like looking at the comments. She doesn't hate Ted Nugent Yeah, I think Ted Nugent's a fucking cuckoo cuckoo and that's why we put a Nina Simone song over,

but you can figure it out. Is that right? Oh, Jesus Christ. This is the best. I love the fucking Wow. Let me see what the ladybugs must be going nuts right now. Oh my God. It's so funny. I wasn't looking before. I was like, you guys are talking about comments that I'm on like the private chat. Oh, don't read the comments. Do yourself a favor? Oh, no, they're great people. Don't take yourself.

I'm not today. The comments are't read the comments. Do yourself a favor. Oh, no, they're great people. Don't take yourself. I'm not today. The comments are roasted toastie. For you, not me. Listen, I'm a white man in America. I have a gun. Listen. Oh, my God. In the state of the shed. I did pick up that gun. We didn't even like five finger. What you did? My finger breaks are not that good. You probably held it to his neck and made him do weird shit to you. I put it in his butt. I did it. I'm just disgusting.

What's this? Is it? You took it too far. Did I? No way. The shit you say? A gun plug. I told you.

I told you. I told you I did. I hooked up with a cop once in Detroit and she took her gun and fuck and put me against the wall. No. Oh yeah, it was the hottest thing ever. That's awesome. She goes, where are you going tonight? She put me against the wall.

She shot the bullet out in the air, caught it, put it on the table. Oh, it was the hottest thing ever. Oh. Oh yeah, she did fall in love with this Republican. So maybe, I don't know what's happening to me. I hope you have a truck. I'm scared. I'm scared for myself. I would love to see you flying down in a pickup truck with a big flag behind you. It was the COVID fever. I don't know what happened. Let me tell you something. It doesn't matter. Sex has no boundaries.

Okay, if you want to bang somebody, right? You'll fucking bang somebody. It doesn't matter. You'll think about it the next day. Let me see the Susu. Did you get the Susu stuff? That's why I left it. That's all right, don't worry about it.

I'll look it back. You'll fucking huge. Is that your apartment by the way? Not. That's two rooms. I've just seen you watching. You just going to go back. I mean, fucking huge. Is that your part? By the way, that's two rooms. I've just seen you. You just went the wrong way. That's the third room. It's a weird rich vase painting on the wall. That's the fourth room. There you go. You have another bed. Susan. That's great. We also have a case on it. Let me see. Get ready. But my question is do you have a flex?

Yes. No, baby couple. Let me see. That's I want that one. I know. This is bad light. I was only prepared to be in that other room. But this is juice.

Do you know I wore all your stuff during my 30 day less city challenge? I did. You know, I noticed and I, the picture that kills me the most is not you, it's max wearing the Liza Colby Sound shirt, sorry. Oh, really? Yeah, he loves it.

It's like touches his little ankle so it just goes all the way down. It's like, Yeah, and here's the thing too, although I'm reading these comments now, you guys have gotten me started. Listen, I love this woman. I love both of these women, okay?

And we can sit here and argue all day long and fight all day long and disagree all day long. And maybe agree on some things and maybe learn something. But I will never not stop loving them and being there for them. And just like I am for you, ladybugs, okay? So that's the way America should work. We should be able to fucking fight it out, disagree,

and then go back and tell some fucking dick jokes and make each other laugh, okay? And fuck it out. And that's, you gotta work it out. And if we're all the same, that's gonna suck a bag of dicks, right? We're all different, we all think differently. And I believe day by day, we are getting better, especially as Americans are getting better. Whatever happens, we have to stick together and we have to love each other as one.

All right? Not as women, not as men, not as black or white, not as inuit, like my forefathers, white, not as inuit, like my forefathers, as one human race in it to win it, raise a bunch of really good kids and change the fucking world, right? And listen to rock and roll and fucking hear some funny comedy, even if it's from a tall blonde woman that looks like a Dutch boy and we, and that's it. You are a Dutch boy. You'd be the first. You'd be, I didn't see any Dutch boy

I'd want more than you, Gabby. That's what I said. Listen, listen, Liza, I told her. She's a Jersey six. She is a Dutch boy, 11. If she was a Dutch boy, I would fuck you by white. If you call me a six one more time, I'm kind of fucking scream.

I'm gonna call in an envelope and send it to your house. Oh, I'm wondering, I'm wondering with all this, I'm like, you know, like, anthrax was a thing at one point, but nobody's mailing COVID and that's, or maybe they are. They are today. Gabby, I saw your fucking, whatever photos you take on Instagram, all right? Oh yeah, I took off underwear photoshoot

in the woods on my work trip this week. For who? For work. For work. That guy with the gun. You got the guy with the gun, made you do that? Yeah, no. All right, listen, I gotta say, when I saw these photos it definitely brought you like a seven and a half

I'm a 10 say it Can you bring up the photos? one second Picture me in parade underwear. What's a parade underwear? It's just a brand of underwear What's a parade underwear? It's just a brand of underwear. I really think we're gonna go into the extra 10. What is it called again? Extra 10. What did I want to call it? Last laugh.

The last laugh. All right, let's do it. Let's do it both ways. Let's go everybody. We're gonna be going to the last laugh right now. So all you guys, your Patreon people, you want to hear the next 10 minutes. You want to hear that dog barks or more? You want to see Gabby coffee and you'll an envelope and send it to me? You want to see my tits? Stay tuned go to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. We're gonna do the next the next 10. What is it called? The extra 10 extra 10 is going Patreon. Oh look at that that mirror tell me to go back in that mirror. He's trying to get the dog the dog everybody's crazy over here now. Oh look at that mirror he is the best looking guy look at him.

You're going to get a little more of that extra 10 the last five. The second we go all right listen. You know what dude. Yeah what a that was a great show. I love her. And here's the thing first of all you cock suckers I wish Anthony Kumi was here. I'm fine. I can handle my I Think it's so mad. Let us disagree. We're having fun. Listen. Here's the deal

No, I liked it there and they're fucking they're doing the same thing. We're doing let them do what they do Yeah, but I'm just telling them That you don't need anybody here to fucking help me with this I handle myself fine there's nobody's gonna fucking what do you think you think kumi is gonna come in here and do a better job at what no she would say she missed She missed Kumiya for this that she was watching this instead of Kumiya. Oh, sorry. I loved you. I'm sorry That's why that's why I said come on in man. We got some names to read come on and that's why I said that's why I get this listen Is that is that little who the fuck was that? Oh? Hi buddy

Hi, what's going on? You want come to hide everybody come on in? All right, you want to read the names of me? Sure. All right. Say hi to everybody. Who's that? Hi dad, I mean hi Gabby. Hi. Hey, do you love everybody? Have your dad. Do you love America? I love America look over here. You love everybody in America. Yeah. Yeah. What's the most important thing to be? What if he said nice, that's right. Nice. He said nice.

What are you doing to my hand? What are you doing to my hand? Let me kiss. Yeah, let's read these names. Let's read them. Oh, I'm going to read them. Every time is a slap. What? No, don't read those. We're reading those.

Here we go. Ready? We're going to read this. Now, can you read them good or not? I'm not going to be able to read these times. You can read them. Ready? Here we go. all right we got all the tens oh god mush No, but you got it no it's a punch in the arm. Okay show me the punch. Oh, that's it like that but no harder Okay, the $10 get a get a slap in the arm. We got a lot of tens No show me the slap

Go ahead show it. No, that's too hard Jesus Maximus Not them not I'm your father. I'm this is my show. I read this not your show it will be your show someday I'm gonna hand it down like a legacy like oh, you know what I wanted I want to talk about something to Come on put that down. It's nothing a business. It's not you are you ready to do this or not? Look at my finger Look at my finger follow my finger focus put that down All right ready here we go Benette Judd

Ten but nice and easy One two three four five six seven ow nine nice and easy. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, ow, nine, ten. All right, cool. All right, Patrick. No slap, no slap. Five, five. Oh, God. John Jacobson. Clap. What do you do? Four, five, six. Those are punch, punch.

Hey, that's a punch. Nine. Yeah. All right, that's good. That's good. Stop it. Joyce, Joyce, Slaps, not punch. Slap up. Joyce, Joyce, Joyce, Joyce, Joyce. Two more. Stop, that's the same guy.

I'm not kidding. Wings up. No, that was good. What? Stop. That's it. What? The way he just winds up. Two more names. Okay. All right. Darrow go one two Five doubles. That's it. That's it. That's doubles. Maximus. All right. That's good. That's it. All right. That's it. One last one. All right

Now we got one more right. That's it. Please. Please. No. No. No. Oh God. This is not going to become a thing. Everybody's going to switch. Okay. Ready? No max. Look at me. Yeah. Put that down. Ready? Tim Connolly. Go. One. $10 is the Macbunches Bobby tier. For $25. That's it. That's it. That's it. Okay.

I want to say this too. You know, Lewis J Gomez. I want to tell you this. Number one, how great was the party? Great. And thanks you. Just looking at you. Thank you, Louis, forgive me me, that trophy. Max won best costume at the party. Oh my gosh. Louis Gomez put on and I have to give him credit. The best party I've, I mean Halloween party. What was it? Well, how many things did they have? They had the trampoline candy jump with a axmer, a chainsaw murdering guy, right? They had the fortune telling downstairs with Christine, they had the haunted room, they had the the

werewolf scare, they had so many fun things to do, they had pizza, candy, cupcakes, we want to trick a treat and write how fun was that? Holy shhh! Max! You want to lose your iPad? No! I'll take away all your candy. Here, I can't see.

Max, give me the glasses. I'm gonna count to five one two three thank you thank you all right the best of the party was the 14 talent because I actually got the greatest portion you did what was your fortune I didn't know this what was it I didn't know this. What was it? Wait, I forgot shit. You can't say anything. Wait, it brings us podcast to a streaming halt. I'm anyways.

I say goodbye to everybody. Are you still going to be on for a little bit? No, yeah, for a minute. But say goodbye. Bye. Still here. Goodbye. All right.

Listen, say goodbye to Gabby. Bye, Gabby. Love you. Gabby really got heated today at daddy. No, I did it. Huh? A little bit. Oh, but not really, man.

Oh, did she come to the house when I were gone? No, she was right here. Mush. Hey. What do we have? What? Make sure, listen, if you listen to this part of the show it's Slash

Robert Kelly you go there and become a member. I'll say it again for ads patreon dot com slash Robert Kelly boom there you go page on dot com slash Robert Kelly. We oh That was a quick steal oh, I can't read the thing Listen lady bugs. I love you. I love you. I love you. I thanks for coming in here and being part of this today Thanks for chiming in my talk. I'm the boss of the show now So make sure. Make sure you go to my dog. Stop. I'm going to stop you.

Listen, make sure. I'm going to get it. Beat it. I'm doing that. Done. Give it that stuff. Your mother just called you. She's pissed.

She just called. Where's my glasses? Get my glasses. Don't She's in character. Where are my glasses find my glasses? I give me my glasses. This is just churn into a fest Where are my glasses Right here give me these glasses. All right now go listen It's all gonna happen Max. Give me this glasses. Now go listen. Oh. It's all gonna happen, Max.

Give me this. Don't sing the song. Goodbye. What song is it? Listen, I just can't. I've lost all. Next. Put it down.

I love you, guys. All right, listen. We'll see you guys. Patreon.com, says Robert Kelly. Make sure. I'm in my liking comment. Okay, says Robert Kelly makes you write it like like in comment. Oh yeah, baby. You have what? Gabby, get up your phone.

We're in the room. No, we're in the room. Go. We're in the room. Go to the group of media. No, we're on social media for Matt. Yes, we're on social media. Make sure you subscribe, like and and comment and all you lady bugs Okay, let's see you guys next week

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