Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Lone

Episode Date: January 14, 2019

We’re back in studio with Joe List, Rich Vos, Andrew Schulz and Von DeCarlo joining Bobby to start 2019 off hot! Comedy bootlegs, judging words, and an in depth critique of Bobby’s new short film! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude on the Riotcast Network Riotcast.com Welcome to the funniest podcast on the planet earth. This is going to be a cost of fire. It's podcast. No rules. What are the mic-ass holes? I'm sure I've already said should I regret it? Can I get a microphone?

Oh, fuck the fuck. That was trying to keep it like a comic-ass. I have a bunch of guys on. It's just us sitting down Yeah, and sometimes it's hilarious. Sometimes it's 10 no topics no directions. I love doing it Side to the coin The day you think my podcast is popular enough where I might affect some of these lines. You never know. It's Robert Kelly, you got AIDS. Oh boy, don't make AIDS jokes. You'll never get that show you want.

Anyways, welcome back. Happy New Year, Merry Christmas. First out of the gate, thank you to all of the YKWD fans. Thousands of dollars was raised in a week, and we brought all those activity pack Melissa and Doug activity kits to the hospital we we dropped off the last like hundred today and they were flipping out the ladies a lot of people donate stuff to hospitals and it's stuff they can't use they're you know whatever I donated a

kidney this year I wish it donated a heart but she don't have one. I saved it. So anyway, he's a kid. I did. I come to my mouth. Do we have, do we have, we don't have medical masks? Yeah. We give him a medical mask for you. I get a medical so get one for his bum Every I'm full of the part. I know you are we can see by your outfit Anyways, I want to thank you guys unbelievable. What else we got Mike? Oh, you also just got back from Quite a little tour all you were going. Oh, yeah, I mean Tacoma and Spokane Spokane Spokane. Spokane. Spokane. Jeremy Spokane. Cause they're from out there you know. Anyways don't worry about it it was a joke Gabby sit on thanks thanks for your enthusiasm. Um with those two black guys hiding under your belly button

I can't see who are they? It's run DMC you fuck. Oh, that's a cool shirt. Thanks. What did you get that? I got it. I've decided to check action. That's fucking cool. I love it boss. Combo met you and then side swipes you.

No, that's a cool shirt. Anyways, both clubs, fuck, I love them. What a great club. Great owners. Everybody was great. I don't believe will you like you play those clubs? I do. I love him. What a great club. Great owners. Everybody was great. Unbelievable. You like you'll play those clubs. I do. I love it. Well, it's run by a comic, which helps any club that's run by a comedian is usually better than a comedian. A club that's not run by a guy. They didn't shoot the mother and father on the mother and father and the son didn't show up this time. Which kind of blows me out. You know when the club, when the owner of the club, that's his week off. He was there when I was there. He was a Hawaii one. I was there. Yeah, yeah, he didn't even show up. But whatever it was still great I had the same thing in Philly, you know Grossman has all these class like he lives down the street They're like you'll see him. Yeah, I did five. He really comes in. Oh really?

Because I felt like I really brought the heat Liberty funny melon you just came back from Liberty funny bow great placemellan, great place to. A lot of swingers. How do you fucking- A lot of swingers. By the- How did you find that out? Because I was talking to- You know, you're doing your show. You're like, I'm like, Hey, you married? No, you're married. No. And then I was like, what the fuck? It was weird how many people weren't married or in this third second, or dating. They were like,

old middle-aged people dating. then I asked somebody is like look man We're a lot. It's a big swing community here Swear to God body swear to God one of the biggest swing dancing or yeah, dude Yeah, I was like swing on the movie. They just yeah, they have now swingers dude There was a guy in the front row and he was like this is I go who's that he goes my girlfriend And I go who's that he goes she's ours too and I was like what is he disgusting looking they were I mean they were I mean I don't know there was somebody's type I like new diplomatic Bob there was somebody's type there were big and I can't really make big jokes. Oh, I know that. You're getting bigger than you.

You're getting bigger than me. It feels cool. It must be nice to be into fat women. Because I feel like you can crack, because most people are not. Yes. So I feel like you'd really crush it. They're gonna crush it.

They'll crush it. What's up? Oh, no. Are you okay? Come in. What? What's wrong, boss? I'm sick. What happened? I said I have might cancel. I'm not gonna do my spot. I'm gonna go home after this

He's really sick. He did come up. I'm here. I drove all the way in so I said fucking I'm sitting here Gassy and coffin listen to it. I don't know. Maybe I don't know. You're canceling a second. You're too gassy Foss what are you what are you doing?? Did you come up here to bag him? No, I came up to talk to you. I didn't realize he was here. Wait a minute, what did you come up to talk to me? You thought like call him, you thought like calling canceled? No, I knew you were here, but I thought you left. Oh no.

You're like, I'm gonna do Bob's podcast and then... I don't know, we'll see. I want that thrown out. No, the whole microphone. I literally want the chair to see. So what? Anyways, yeah, great club. What else, Mike? Let's do your dates, Bobby. Oh, come on. I get here. You're literally early. What do you mean we're early? You're not in the clock. Yeah, what time is it? You know, the clock. No, it's not 10 minutes late. You're 15

minutes early. Whatever. All right, guys, you can try to get all the shit out of the clock. No, it's not 10 minutes late your 15 minutes earlier That Mike all right guys, you can try to get all the shit out of it. Wait. Where's Chicago the same weekend? I know What are we gonna hang you gotta be sucking my cock? I'm gonna be please I'm gonna do it before we go dog the last factory is right down the street I have like a Sarah to we could swing no And then Saturday you're in lens. I love That's like six months old. Oh, sorry I knew there Thursday. I think so. Oh, cuz I was gonna say I only get a bonus for Thursday and late Friday Yeah, so you know, I'm already a ball show. There's a few tickets left. All right

So go to my show fill out the rest of mine, then fill up, go to Joe's. Yes. Go see both of us, but see me first. Yes. Talk both our dicks. Yeah, talk about our dicks, and then we'll smoke a cigar with you. Yes.

That's a term I'm using, by the way. Talk to your dicks. I get it. We figured that out. Chicago LaFactory, the 18th, and then I'm at the Robin Theater on the 19th in Lansing, Michigan. And then the 24th, I am at Bridgeport, Connecticut for the stress factory.

And then Albany, Funnybone, and then Tampa. I'm doing the impractical Joker's cruise. Whoa. I think you're gonna have fun on that. Am I? We did last year, we had a good time. You know, when I'm in Lansing, I do the Batman theater.

Hmm. Well, when are you up to Funnybone? Are you there to weaken? I'm in Albany. When? when are you at the funny bone? Are you there to week? I'm in Albany. When? What week are you there? It says right there, the second. The first and the second. Are you kidding?

Why? I think I'm there to week after. Whatever. Anyways. What else we got? Go to robacadolive.com, go to my Patreon right now. Right now. February 2nd. The comedy works. And fucking an Albany.

This is the funny part. You guys are down the street from each other. Yeah, we're down the street from each other. You're at 100 seat or I'm a 350 seat. I'm getting the money I want, so I don't get it. I'm not saying it's a bad thing. I love Tommy's club. No, he has a different, I'm not a, his club is different.

It's Saratoga. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love it. It's a great club. It's a great room. A great room. And there's a cigar bar on the corner of that street that's old school. Really cool. Oh, yeah.

But wait, how far am I from you? How far away? Saratoga is far from Waldeny. That's like a 30 minute drive. Oh. Do I stay in Saratoga? No, you stay in Albany. I stayed in Saratoga.

You did drive all the way back and forth, right? I don't know. He put me in. Oh, but I think I did a bio because I didn't have a car. Yes. He put me don't know. He put me into buy out because I never car. Yes Yeah, he put me in all that he did You just puking your mouth, but I want to eat fucking chips When does the show start what are we doing? I

The shed is back Gabby's dad David Bryan episode coming out Sunday. I thought your dad was bon Jovi Yeah, yes, no, no, no, no, oh It's called the bon Jovi great guy. What do you hold it up? Do you want him to see that? Yeah, oh, yeah Good Michael Chase doing a benefit correct. Yeah, this Friday if you're in New York It's at Irving Plaza hosted by Jeff Ross and all proceeds are going to the New York City has an authority Oh And I'll be there photographing oh So if you

Feature Michael Chase featuring that's embarrassing Oh, who could it be? Jeff, now where is this again Ir Irving Plaza. Irving Plaza. Friday. This Friday. Check that out. I'm not giving you a great show. We got shields coming up.

I hear new shields coming up. All right, so yeah, this should be a great show. Love, I love Che. What else do we got? You're, you're patron on? Oh, patreon. Yeah. Ha ha ha.

patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. Of course, this Sunday, David Bryan's episode, live from the shed. He came up to the shed, Voss's episode is up there, which is one of the funniest, one of my favorites. And then we also got one on one's up there. I just did a great one on one that I shot. And then I shot a little short that's up there too.

It's all you put it online. It's on my Patreon. It's unbelievable. It's a masterpiece. It's up to you too. It's all you put it online. It's on my Patreon. It's unbelievable. It's a masterpiece. It's fucking it. It's like, I thought it was a Scorsese short film. What was the meaning of it? Why don't you play the film for us?

It's too long to play. It's on the Patreon. We're trying to give people to go on the Patreon. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, to you guys. It's too long. Four minutes? It's a short that's too long. It's four minutes? It's a short, that's too long.

We can talk for minutes on a, to watch something on a podcast for four minutes with youth. All you need is a long. All you need is a minute. All they need is a minute to watch. Ah! If you go to my page, John,

what's your name again? Zach, is it on my pick? You go there and see if you can watch a little bit of You want to go I want to get a crackin I Skipped in my first three lines that bird stinks What's work with you? I've worked a half hour ago what are you talking about? Oh, maybe it's me. I think it's me. There it is right there. It's called loan. Oh nice.

Gabby liked it. Yeah. You got to need a london. I love it. I love it. I love it. Did you like the jump cuts? I, the jump cuts made it for me.

Yeah. Yeah. It's not easy for Bob to jump. Whoa. Andrew, what's up, Bob? How you doing, guys? How you doing, man? I'm good.

What's going on with this outfit? What's going on with guys? How you doing man? I'm good. What's going on with this outfit? What's going on with this? A bullseye? I'm wearing my, oh this right here? Yeah, what is that? This is a brand called Stone Island. Yeah.

And it's like the soccer hooligans in Europe where? Really? Yeah, so if you ripped that off of somebody, that's a big deal in the fight. So if somebody wanted to fight you right now, they could rip that off. Yeah. You know all they would warn you and they would think they got something

No, I'll show those the SS is that way Get out of here. It's been around since then yeah, so is Volkswagen. Yeah, it's like a jettah Now you make boss laugh. We're gonna deal with that fucking look me a cough. Where you sound like you sound like a little call him What's that? He called you not call it it. I know. Yeah, what happened? What are you taking notes that you're doing on this?

That's a joke. You're a fucking asshole. Why? Out of cut clips. Why? I guess. Yeah. Why are you wearing camouflage?

We can easily see you. Why? I saw that joke coming from. I don't hire the way. Come on, play some of your movie. Yeah, that should have been to hide the fat or disguise the fat. No, I don't go after him.

I don't go after him. What is the movie for those of us who don't know? Bobby did a short film. It's amazing. No, no, no, we can't go back to that again. No, I have a Patreon. So you have a Patreon, you're creating content for the Patreon.

Thank you. And you want to get people to watch the Patreon. Andrew can sell anybody. Andrew can make somebody famous in like a day. The way, look at the what he's doing right now. This is a good time. I'm just trying to understand. So this is something, are you gonna do it regularly

on the Patreon? I do it regularly. So you make this? You're gonna end with Bobby crying. You're trying my best, Andrew. No, these short films, you make them regularly? No, it's called, it is hotel room. He made it's called alone. Uh-huh. No, it's not called alone dummy alone alone You can't get loan like L.O.N. or

I picked the wrong guy. You're the only one who's gonna watch it It's like a 12 likes There's 12 comments 10 likes while my comments and likes that's good that's yeah, which reason comment Can you read the comments? You can't cough on the microphone you gotta step clean. Don't you have a us give you a little SARS mask or something that you can protect us from This awful cold. It's on its way out. Yeah.

You weren't even sick the other day. You were. I'm having fun about a week now. Oh, okay, yeah. I hope it takes you out. Join now for one dollar per month. You got to get rid of that. How?

Why? It's got to start a five. What? Nobody loves someone a dollar. Anybody willing to pay. Take it out. Take it out. Take it right.

Because I went three on our pot Yeah, we have a thousand people that's 15 her max each night out, but if they pay three they'll pay five They pay for you to pay five exactly You understand the people that that love you. Yeah gang signs want to come want to commit that to Jack I mean they want to commit money to you. I love the way we're in a fucking who look in jacket and a space jib You're like a kid, butigan jacket and a space jib. You're like a kid, but you'll murder somebody. Exactly. Go ahead.

So yeah, so that's it. I mean, you just gotta know what people are gonna give you. You know what, I don't not listen to you anymore, Andrew. Andrew's not a set. Let's have ever since the Chris Evans. He's a Chris Evans. Oh yeah, do you remember? You know I ran into him again.

What do you say? This year, I ran into him at the Boston this year 2019 2018 at the comics come home I do the fucking thing I go up 17,000 people murder I go to the after party who's walking out Chris Evans his mom his friends Chris seven America man That's I how can you be so smart so dumb and so dumb in the city? What is it? What is it? We can cap America captain America. Yeah, you know every

name. That's the DC version. Not you. Hey me. Call them American man. Okay. So Chris Evans go. Is it a cat? You got fake hair, right? I don't know. Ah, I browse. I don't think so, but that's gotta be real. Buddy. That's his hair. Now what? No, it's scopes here but that's got to be real. Hey buddy. That's his hair. Thank you. What no? It's scopos here when he got listen to me when he does like scopo when he does Captain America Yeah, he wears Captain America hair, but that is his real hair. Okay, but Captain America has been torn apart Now he's a court jester with a broken heart He said turn me around and take me back to the start is he bought no, he's not

Listen, that's paradise city guns Guns and roses. Sorry, it's not a fucking bond. Jovi, Lira. Come on. I was my first album. I have to type for destruction. Listen, Bob. First album. He said he ever bought Andrews. He's a great actor. Andrews, a great, he should look at your movie, at least a minute other because he's a good actor. So, it was, and again, you know, I don't have to say anything about this, but if, uh, if, if I had content that I wasn't putting up regularly, I would give it away. I think Patreon stuff should be, you know, with regularity because you're committing an amount of money a month regularly, right? So they won't. They have regular. They have a live from the shed. Right. A show I shoot out of my life.

I know I see that. I love it. I've almost subscribed. Right. Because of your live from the shed. Because of the little clips that you put, especially the one with you two. I thought that was really funny. Yeah. how can we didn't subscribe? We quit our patreon, but we should have yeah, it's too much. I'm tired of all this fucking work I like it you do it because you're lonely. I know I like being creative. You do I like it So was some of the movie that was creative. Are you in it? Why you keep pushing this movie? I feel like you wrote a line and you're like, that's my line.

There's no line with the movie. I should give away the movie without, yeah. There's no lines that Bobby's belly either. Without a doubt. I'm gonna give it away, but I give it to them first. Oh, that's great idea. Yeah, that's great. I give it to them, some stuff I give it to them first

and then I put it out. And I just, if, yeah, so. So you already gave it to them some stuff I give it to them first and then I put it out love and I just Yeah, so you already gave it to him right six out of like a city already gave it to him right I gave it to him Yeah, all right, so then then give it to give it to us now I understand what you're doing. I just telling you how to do it. I know what I'm doing with patreon I'm my patreon. No, no, no, no, no, go to my patreon. Why you guys want to see a successful patreon? Go to mine Okay, let's go big I'm calm slash Flagrid to flagrid come to flagrid cut There it is

No, that's probably my Twitter. I just I got a lot of Twitter. Uh, patrons today Oh, cuz you're fucking movie. Yeah, we're really bringing the heat on this one I wish it would have came out before the gold. Now go to patreon.com. Slash. Slash. Flagarin too. I listened to WTF Slash episode today. What does that mean?

With slash from the slash, the guitarist, Saul. Wow. And we nod for questions. I'm nodding. Stop here on your phone reading. I don't know what that's going on. I'm getting the fucking thing. What are you getting? I'm getting the episode.

The episode of what? I'm gonna be able to see it. But you're getting negative comments on the YouTube page right now. Yeah, so the fuck yeah. They can take a fucking second. Now, Zach. Yeah. Listen, get that to him look it I want I just

sent it to you on your phone I don't want you to show where it's from just show so don't show where it is just show the video you understand I put it up for I put it up somewhere for a second just look at the link I sent you I don't want to know where it is. Zach's gonna fuck up. Let's give him a mic. Give him a mic. Anyways, we'll watch you. I'm gonna watch you at two minutes of it. I mean, it's a good idea. Just watch it. Give it to the people, man. It's great.

Then Andrew, listen. Then we'll keep watching it. I understand what you're doing. Well, you get 20,000. You get 20,000 a month from your fucking Patreon. Yeah, absolutely. Almost 21,000. Now he's gonna fucking, that's great. Send him down a spy. Oh, I'm a big fan of Andrews.

Big fan of rich. Yeah, but he's gonna. First of all, I only show this because for some reason, people don't think that you know what you're doing unless you're rich or dead. So like, if I show that I make that a month on Patreon, then when I say things, it's more valuable to you guys. Maybe not you guys, but like to most people, I could give a fuck. Like I've always looked up to you as a comic. I've always looked up to you the comic that's the only thing I care about but like most people up at rich I made this right like it's such a weird thing like Elon Musk. He's not the best engineer You know what I mean just rich rich rich rich

2000 I just think Jenna Monte he wouldn't go anyway. He'd stay on my golf. He could buy some rubber. I'd say no more golf anyhow. If you made 20,000 a month. That's great. It's great. What you could, why should you not? How does rich make 20,000 a month?

I'm a bank. I'm a bank. I think you could. Absolutely. I don't see why not. You definitely have the talent. What? You got to build a community.

But before we hang on stopped, though, you have a big fan base should tap an into Shalamey and the dog build a fan base that podcast with him. You're getting that. Absolutely. They came to you That's like if when we were to go in a we got that fan base to sure so you should have built it off of that Well, they fucking you know, they kind of felt but Fuck your nose. They kind of not apart. They fucking read the news. They kind of not talking about it. But I think it's more about like you're creating a place for them to go, right?

Like this is about community. The reason why people like you and they follow what you're doing is because they're part of this kind of community that you've built here. Well, Andy has great guests. I think that's a big part of it. And guests, of course. But I think that's what people don't,

I think that's what people miss. It's a weird thing though. The dollar thing to the five dollar thing is a really interesting psychological question. Our minimum, if I'm willing to type my fucking credit card into something, I'm willing to give you five bucks. Our minimum was $50 to join. That's why I didn't go.

We, it was 50. You sick, it makes me sick. Yeah. Ha, ha, ha, ha. I sick. That's what I was like. I established $3. Now I can't up it now. Yes, you can. Because anybody paying through, pay five.

Now they'll pay five years. They know how much value they're getting from it. They're like, fuck, I love this. They might be obsessed with it. I love hanging out with you. It's just a thing. Comics, we don't think we're worth anything, right? So like when we charge stuff, we have this insecurity.

Like, here's the thing about us, right? We want attention. We don't even think we deserve attention. So we make other people laugh. So there's an even equity exchange. Like if you ever seen like a like a fat model, fat models just think they deserve attention. They're not even willing to lose weight for it. We are the exact opposite. We're like the most insecure. So we're like, fuck it. I'll make these people laugh so I can get attention. So you don't think you're worth $5. You're on way more. He's not, no, he's not.

Okay. This guy will go to five. He's five. Come on. Dude, when you're on the road, how much do they pay for you? I don't know. They pay the tickets, you mean? I don't know, $20.

Joe, you're fucking hilarious. I mean, I love to bust your ass. And bust your balls about it. Ready? Yeah, we watching it. See, that bucks. Joe, you're fucking hilarious. I mean, I love to bust your ass. And bust your balls about it, right? Yeah, we watching it. Are you ready? See, that was easy. Are you ready? Yeah, let's do it.

All right. I got it. I'm so excited. Oh, do I need this for that? No, just, you know. I know that hotel. Oh. Is that sticks? I think that bears.

I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears.

I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think that bears. I think. Look at the road just leaned. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Stop, stop, stop, stop. No, stop, stop, stop, stop. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I sat down! Hell no, I don't know how it ends.

Oh my god, I just got a very great Patreon idea for you. You sit down with comics and let them watch this. Every week, different comics get to watch this. And it's only on your fucking Patreon. Easily recreatible, I would sign up for that alone just to see... Oh my god. Lauren, you just said it. See?

It's in the ether, play this see Shit can you rewind to the bed? We can I just want to see it because it looks like lips looks like a Salvador dolly It's like you know in P.V. He's playhouse when the chair talks Shut up. Okay. That's good Bad just went oh You didn't like the temperature I'm not gonna be reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting.

I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting.

I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. I'm not reflecting. This is content sound like the devil can people at home watch this right now? They're watching with us, but if they don't watch live they have to go to patreon and guess where the fuck After they hear us talking about this goddamn video keep playing the video Listen listen listen He's set him down. Yes. I don't like what this is going. I fucking love it I would subscribe just to keep doing this. I'll give you $5 right now May 20,000 a month Look at me wait wait to this is breakfast open yet? I wish you would heave yourself out the window. What are you?

Those are the pictures from the wall. He's putting himself there. Jesus. This is deep. This is so deep. It's like a bad ass entrance. I think Andrew likes it now. That's definitely an eye-like face.

It's really interesting. I have questions, but I'll wait till it's done. Yeah, yeah, a film should always leave you with questions. Yeah, you're not making another one. Stop, stop. No, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait What are you taking we were silent for like a minute straight go go go go Where's hardy Oh You're the new Louis man. Why they're still girl in the room. Stop, stop, no, almost there! It's just that minute! Come on, stop it!

Let's go, we're almost there. Oh, the ending's amazing. I can't wait. Oh. Oh. Back to the thermometer. Okay. I will leave that, Daddy.

She work up a sweat sitting. He's so exhausted. He's so exhausted from reflecting. He's going exhausted from reflecting his back bed. They reflect that god don't really knock them out. Don't, okay, don't get it out, Bobby. Oh, no... No, not very nice. I like that. Max shows a lot of promise.

Oh, wow. Where'd you film us? Where'd you film it? I'm being dead to serious. Where'd you film it? Six and Addy? No. No, that was like a... On the road to coma. Okay. Okay, and just... I'm not being fun being 100% here You see a picture on the wall that and you asked somebody in the hotel

It's called was here. No, no, no, it's called a This is a guy on the internet to film He's a filmmaker and it's called a born-room challenge So when you're in a room and you make a short with Inspired by the room you're in in a hotel room. So that's what it is. So you come up and you can, you know, do whatever B roll, blah blah blah, I'll put it in. So I just did it. Or you get the B roll. That's why I went out to the things. That's fucking cool. You didn't take those off the internet. Now I did that. That's fucking cool, man. No, you went to the Gandola and to the...

Yes. Gandola. Gandola. The Gandola. Fuck this all off. Fuck this all off. They don't turn this around on me. Listen, now, they're just turning...

I'm taking a bounty! Okay. 30 minutes. I told them that's it. I told them that's it. I told them that's it. I told them that's how John Wayne Casey started his day. Dude, I thought that was really creative.

Yeah, that was great. I'm, I thought that was really creative. That was great. I'm telling you, that was some fucking... That was some salad or dali shit right on the screen, man. I think it was really cool. Why don't I give that out? Dude, this is great content. This is good content to do something every single week

and you're on the road. I would give it away for sure. Yeah, you're not doing anything wrong with Daryl. I should have named it away for sure. Yeah, you're not sure. That's not pay one out of the deal. I should have named it Gandola. Yeah. What I would do? What I would do if I may. Yeah.

Under a minute. So it's Instagrammable. Yeah. And I made it. I made it. I thought she didn't have the mark. I don't know. You can do the good idea.

Here's the good idea. Yeah, but no, no, just one. One, it's a minute long. And then what you should do is let people comment No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Everybody's gonna see it. You do one every single weekend when you're on the road. Yeah, I'm good with that. All right. Yeah, I'm fucking 48. I don't need that shit in my life. But you have been doing it for 20 years, I don't wanna. I don't need to fucking it. That's not what you do. You hang it with a guy that calls himself a god.

Right. I'm sure he doesn't sit there going, dude, trash me on the internet. Yeah, of course. No, you don't. I, of course I do. I do, but um, that, that, let me tell you something out I wouldn't put it out there. It's out there for

Whatever I don't give a fuck if you make fun of it. It's fine for me Oh, it's nice. Are you gonna end it into like try back or something? No, are you kidding me? No? I made it with my iPhone you I would call it good. I would call it a thermostat They make big movies. I didn't touch the fucking heat, that was the blinds. Whatever the fuck it was, it didn't. Oh, it was the blinds. Yeah, if you look in the mirror, there's a lot of stuff, the mirror of the blinds was going

up with that. And the clock only represents three minutes of gone by. I saw that. Two minutes ago. You poisoned the well because you said you said thermostat so I was taking thermostat. I thought it was thermostat too especially once he's in the thermostat. Yeah it was the blinds if you look in the and only three minutes run by but it felt like two days. You were sitting there.

This is a funny part though. It felt like you were murdered. The reason why I showed it to I'm now I was never going to show it to boss why I showed it to, I was never gonna show it to Vos. I wasn't gonna show it to anybody, it was gonna be on my Patreon, but I knew Vos was coming to hunt today. So last night I said I want you to go watch this. He's like, I watch it tomorrow. I go, I did watch it tomorrow.

I go, it's four minutes. He goes, oh. I go, just watch it. He's like, what is it? I go, it's a short I did. In my, you know, blah, blah, blah. All right, I'll watch it. He's like, what is it? I go, it's a short I did. In my, you know, blah, blah, blah. He's like, all right, I'll watch it right now. But I showed Gabby the same thing.

And I showed Becky the same thing. And the response from Becky, she loved it. She loved it. Gabby said, I loved it and everything. But as he starts to trash it, Gabby starts to laugh at it too. So my psycho loved to look at it. But you walked in and were trashing it, Gabby starts to laugh at it too. So my psycho logic, but you walked in and we're trashing it of course too.

So I trashed it. Well not, I mean a little bit, but it's fine, but it's very funny how people take certain shit. You know what I mean? Like she's very, Becky is very sensitive. Sensitive and beautiful. Yeah, and Gabby has a little fucking Jersey shitting her like you do.

But she has a little of Becky too, you know what I mean? And you're just a hunk of shit. Yeah, my point is, I'm a hunk of shit. I know how I want my blinds. I don't make four trips to the fucking wow, that was very, I know. Wait a second, what, I compliment you today, I said it was very creative or something,

or I said, I like the editing or something. It's very creative, let's be honest, it's not good. You know what, you don't watch the Godfather go, that was a creative film. It's not supposed to be, it's a exercise in creativity. It's taking an eye, I took an iPhone, and your imagination and making some. It's like one of those cooking shows

where they give you like pretzels and they're like, you know, make this, I don't know if I, I don't know. So you're doing the wrong exercises in life. That's a problem. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not.

I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. What type of exercise could I do that would drastically improve my well-being? I would stare out the window. Garnio! I'm gonna sit down and film it.

I wish we were somebody to come and will you out and take you into the courtyard. Come on, body, time for medication. I'm hot. I'm hot. I'm lazy. I'm getting embarrassed because my ears are getting hot. I can feel it. Whoa. Oh.

Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, that was so long day though. I'd go right back to bed too if I, if I stood up to when I was three minutes. I mean, if you look at it, you, I mean, there is a, there is a thing, a meaning to it.

Yeah. I mean, there is. You don't get it because, us. You don't have any. I have a lot of culture. No, you have no empathy. You don't care about the human race. You care mainly about yourself. Yeah, I can see. And I'm on a survival mode. And then your daughters and then and then your wife. No, not my wife. My daughters and golf, not my wife. Where's comedy?

yourself okay, but I think that is We care about humanity. Yeah, yes, I made that loan that pieces is about humanity or is it about a broken bridge? Boy I can't play you. No. It'd be interesting to see what you would have become. I mean, boss is just calling Seattle stupid. You know boss is so fucking, he wants to, he wants to tear into this so bad. He doesn't know when it's starting.

He's a saying shit Seattle. I didn't know you went to all those places. That's a fucking big day. Well, here's the answer. Do you want to know the inspiration behind it? I'm trying to move on personally. What was the inspiration? Yeah, what I do want to know.

Well, I was sitting in the room and I saw, you know, so many times we go on the road and we just as comics wake up go back to just sit in the room we never go anywhere we never do that we never do anything right okay well I'm speaking from you know maybe you don't know but you probably at one point did it's some yeah when it's freezing when it's cold shut up there's snow okay or I'm reflecting all right sometimes I'll wake up and I won't even have coffee. I'll just look at the clock Here's an I'll go I like that picture. Let me go find that in town

Boring a smoke hand Find the fucking pictures in the hotel room. It's not a picture of Walmart in my room. I'm telling you. The only thing to do is find the fucking pictures in the hotel room. It's not a picture of Walmart in my room. I'm not going anywhere. This is the Bobby Kelly Challenge. The Bobby Kelly Challenge is finding the pictures of the hotel on the road. Oh shit. I like the hotel on the road. Yeah. Oh shit. I like it round trip, taking the Paris.

Ah. I think it seems like a nice thing to do. All right, so the thing was, is that we were in the room. I mean, the room a lot of times. And you do see there's so much shit to do in these places that we go to. And I looked in the wall and I'm like, oh, I bet that is here. I bet that tower was here.

And I looked out the window and it was right there. Mm-hmm. Holy fuck, what a gondola. The gondolas. The gondolas. Oh, gondola. Whatever the fuck does it matter? Well, I looked and I'm like, oh, they're right there.

And I was like, I'm going to go get a bunch of beat. I'm going to go to these fucking places right now. And I felt a little weird because I went to the gondola rod and it was just me. You get on the gondola rod? Yeah, I did. That's how I got the footage. What do you think?

I started kicking it from the ground up my door. I was in it. I was in it. And then what happened? I felt a little weird because I had to buy a pair of gloves in a scarf because it was so cold and a hat. And I wanted to buy a trifecta purple pair and the little little purple. I looked like a food critic just taking a fucking... I was just buying myself on a gondola with a camera.

The fat queen just trying to get memories. The only interesting thing is in town. My fucking lover that died in the fucking 80s. So, oh my god. So, oh god, I wish I'd gone a little broke. So I got all this, and I went back and I made it. It instant, the photos and the repayment of the room inspired me to make this little thing. So, but why don't you call it loan?

Because you're, I'm alone a lot. I'm not alone, I don't feel bad. I'm just alone. I'm, you're by yourself with nobody, you know? A lot, I am all the time. Yes. I'm just, I have nobody. When I'm on the road, I don't, I don't bang chicks.

I don't, we know that. Uh-huh. Well, it's, it's, I don't, I don't feel bad. I love my, but a lot of times you don't get out of that fucking room. A lot of times you wake up and you sit there and you get on fucking Instagram. And you sit in your room, go back to,

get some football, blah, blah, blah. And then you go to the show and you come back. And if you're not banging, if you're not trying to get laid, if you're not trying to party, if you're not drinking a smoking, fucking pot in mushrooms, you're going back to your laid, if you're not trying to party, if you're not drinking a smoking, fucking pot in mushrooms, you're going back to your room, by yourself. You have to, after the show.

I always go, but Thursday nights, I go to Walmart's Thursdays. Well, you rent the car. You rent the car everywhere. Yeah, but you get fucking, you go and get hams and cheeses. I buy food, so I have healthy food at the hotel. I know, you make it like it's your home.

Hand and cheese. Yeah, I don't get that hotel. I don't you make it like it's your home. And cheese. Yeah. I don't get that at the hotel. I don't do it. Yeah, well, you see we look. Yeah, I don't get the fucking, I have a different deal than you, too. In my contract, they pick me up at the airport, they drop me off, they pick me up at the hotel.

You have to get a car. No, I don't have to. I can get picked up, and I go play golf, so I need a car. I'll go to the archery range or something. What? I'll go to the archery range. something. What? I'll go to the archery range. If it's too cold to play golf, I'll go fucking shoot at the range.

I've tried to find things to do in the day. I'll go to a meeting sometimes, you know, whatever. But now I'm going to sit and I'm going to fucking investigate where the paintings are from. You're here, you're here. I'll tell you this. It's all recording anywhere around here. I'll tell you this. You wouldn't be able to do what I did. No, not at all.

You would be able to do it. You would not be able to take an iPhone and an iPad and edit a little shit like that in one day. I couldn't do it in a month. Yeah, but can you triple bogey a par four? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck?

Jesus. Jesus. Look at this spin all over the place. I feel like I'm on a gondola right now. I bet if you slow that down, it would be very beautiful. You got to do that do that you know what you got to do you got to do one of those movies up at Niagara Falls That would be beautiful We're not doing that anymore rich that would be beautiful Fucking Joe That's a well placed fucking Fucking Death virus That was a well placed fucking. Oh fuck, where's some good wet into my shoe? I'm not saying you're fucking your death virus.

I just tasted some, I just tasted the lice all. So now when you got to me, you got a dollar before you went on, right? You figured, what? You gotta know which one to get on, shaking. I know, I know, I always, I'm always getting, they call it like a b-roll. Any time, I'm anywhere. They call it a B-roll on the on the yeah they call B-roll so anytime I'm somewhere and I see something like I was going

over bridge and what coming back from, I mean, Andrew. I mean, I'm trying to just have a conversation. Don't dumb yourself down. I'm not, they call it B-Roll. You know what the fuck it's called. I know what it's called. So you're called a sore of this shit. You know what B-Roll is? I just shut up.

You are. So I, I, I, I'm coming by, the fog's coming up the sun. And I get that footage because you never know. You can use it for anything. You're right. Anytime the plane lands and we're coming by the fog, coming up the sun, and I get that footage because you never know, you can use it for anything. Anytime the plane lands and we're coming over the city and this clouds, I always get that shit. You can use it for something. I like filmmaking, I like that shit.

I don't wanna look it, but I don't wanna be that guy. I'm not gonna take head shots, I don't care about that shit. I, but I do like, I like filmmaking and it's easiest form. We saw that. I like the fact that you can do that. So it was great. Yeah.

I couldn't ever judge, it's clever, it's creative. I'm telling you, it was very creative. All right, whatever. You're done. Everybody's good. What sort of picture of the bed in the room too? She found that a couple times. Wow.

I got to see it. We're not using the bomb, Dan anymore. Yeah. No, because he's sick. Take it away. Take it away. Anyways. So it's been a fucking weird.

How is everybody's holiday, by the way? Oh, small talk now. No, I really want to know. Mine was good. Mine was good. I had New York, took New Year's off. First time in my life. I don't like this.

You know what? I had a great time on Tacoma and Spokane. But I really loved New Year's off. I hate being away. I hate doing shows. It was my first time taking off since I was 19. I went and saw a rock and roll band really yeah lily high it and then margo price kind of a new hot country rock where Williamsburg it was

fun wow it's your anniversary of sobriety too isn't it it was I've got some in my seventh year of sobriety congratulations buddy thank you thank you appreciate Yeah, so you want to do you want to tell your story good? Well, I shit in the girl shoe got herpes failed at comedy and got sober and now I'm doing okay Thank you Joe for sharing. Thank you. Thanks What kind of show where the or is? It was a speaker was a high-top Nike sneaker. Did you really shit in a girl's show? Yeah, of course, you know the story. I shit in a girl's show, I pissed in her rug also.

And I didn't just shit in the show, I traipsed it around. There was like footprints of shit everywhere. Oh, yeah, it was really bad. Is she a comedian? No, no. She's dead now, I think. No, but that one, that I kept drinking for a couple of years after that.

I drank that night. Yeah, you were bad. That's all you did was drink you didn't do drugs. I did it a little bit, I was never a drug guy. I would smoke weed and if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, if I had to, to say in my entire life like three beers and a vikin is the best I've ever felt including in Subradi. No, I thought Subradi was watching Bobby's movie because it made me just calm and relaxed and reflect on

the times I spent in hotels where I just sat around and now I know now I know that I could go around town Now I know I can film the I want this to happen. I hope you have pneumonia and you die. I also beat dead horses on the road or does that something you do here? I told you he was staying the whole time. I like both that little excuse me, me happy. The beat that I was, I thought I was standing up. We could do an hour on that, fucking thing. Well, we could listen to your dumb story about shitting into a sneaker.

That's your bottom please. It's like a dick to get fucking high. You suck a dick? No, I like to see that short. No, why do I have that board, dude? I'm so going to suck it up. I'm so going to suck it up. I'm so going to see that short. No wonder why that board, dude. Show your mouth's card again. Let's hope it's short. He's not going on the other door on the whole tower.

I'm blowing guys. Nothing better than the I was worse than you, sober guy. No, I should. I mean, I see guys like you and me. He's like, ah, what are you, are you fucking comparing? No, I'm saying it's a great story. It's a fucking, you don't want to blow it up as fucking bottom. What is your bottom? This fucking podcast.

My bottom. Yeah. It's three years. I know what you know what Norton's bottom is. Him. Because he's bottom is. Him? Because he's the bottom. Oh, I didn't get it. I got you.

I didn't. No, I'm not comparing. You're not going to tell us your bottom? My bottom? Yeah. Please, I don't know. I have a million. I'm free base of fucking car accident robbing people.

Whatever. The fucking, you know, just either I would be dead you know get clean or die right it was at that there was no during that period I mean there's a million fucking stories but during that that three-year period you said it was like three years right a free base yeah where would you tend to take shits I I wouldn't fuck up Nike's I would do them in reb-boss Cuz Nike's are too nice I'm not gonna fuck up a girl for over Jordan you're like nah I can't I can't I can't I Bought her new shoes okay last we know no she'll be after two weeks later

What did she say whether she looked like what? Girl's wearing high top Nike's Where's hi Michelle wears hi, I hate I hate the high heel sneakers. I hate it. There's nothing I hate more so unattractive. Yeah, I hate redheads. Redheads are cute. I like redhead. Ah, huh. We were looking up the high heel. Yeah, that's what he's doing. Not high heel that say, there you go. Yeah, it does. It doesn't annoy me. That's ridiculous. I like the ones in, there you go. Yeah, it does. It doesn't annoy me.

That's ridiculous. I like the ones in the end though, the little, the gate, the gate, the gate, the gate, the gate. Yeah, I get those. Gayshoes, not Asian. No, Gaysho. Look at that. I wonder in town where that's a Gucci.

I wonder in town where that shoe is at. Which one? The one at the end. Look at those. I like those heels. Those are fun. Those are sexy. No, no, no, no, no. Look at those. I like those heels, those are fun. Those are sexy. Anyways, what did you do, Andrew,

for New Year's Christmas? New Year's I was off. Christmas I hung out with the family. Christmas is fucking lonely, man. There was a shoota-made-a-movie. I know, dude, but I was thinking about that, how absurd it is to feel lonely, knowing that it's all kind of made up,

like this idea that I should be spending Christmas morning with my family is made up. That's not like a real concept, but I was having breakfast at this hotel because it was the only thing open and I'm like, I was like embarrassed. I was like, why the fuck am I all alone on Christmas day? And then I was like, why do I have to be embarrassed? This is self-imposed. This idea that I shouldn't be able to just eat

Mercosho. No, no, no, you're a loser. That's a good idea. I'm a loser for other things. But like that. No, you know, because you've done something your whole life and those are tradition that you like. Right. Right. And then you do sometimes grow out of that tradition and sometimes you can't complete that mission every year. But if you're with your parents, you would have been cool and you would have been happy. But the fact of being away, you feel like, oh shit. It makes me realize how tradition really

keeps couples and shit together. I think a lot of people are together simply because of holidays and family tradition. No, we fucking hate holidays. I hate Bonnie and I, like, they're ridiculous. Yeah, but you guys are comics, right? Like you're seeing the world a little bit differently, but the people who are like, I gotta be at dinner with my husband or else my whole family's gonna be asking questions, whereas

my husband, she goes, yeah, go ahead. But I don't know, there was like this guy that would, I had this girlfriend back in the day and there was this guy who would come to the Christmas, right? And he was the ex-husband of like her cousin or some shit. I'm like, why the fuck are you here? They didn't have any kids together. Nothing, I was like, what the fuck are you doing here? And it's simply because he had that feeling

that I had a breakfast which was like, man, I am a fucking loser for doing this shit alone. I think that there's a lot of, New Year's Eve, I always felt that way. There was so much pressure to have like the ultimate night. The best night, yeah. I always hated, I couldn't wait for it to be over. I knew you're even, I got on stage, I sit on it and say, I go, I don't know what you're expecting,

but what I'm doing tonight is what I did three weeks ago. It's exactly change the expectation, but there is that pressure, right? It's like, I got the best night. Two days, oh, there. Two days or so. There's two days that happen. I mean, I got my wife to go away to a rubah for Thanksgiving. Right. A year ago, which was awesome.

Great. It was like, look, this is horseshit, some Indian, whatever. We don't even know what really happened. Right. Let's just go have turkey somewhere else. And we went to a rubah. I did shows. We were on the beach.

It was fucking awesome. I'm trying to get it to go on Christmas to a way, I wanna go away somewhere. I wanna go to Bruges. Love it. Somewhere on Christmas. It's gonna take a long time. It's gonna take a long time.

Yeah, of course. Yeah, no, last one. He wants to go last one. Why are you playing Christmas now? Why are you playing next Christmas now? Why am I playing? Planning. Planning.

So going, you wanna go to Belgium? am I planning? Planning. Oh, planning. So go on, you want to go to Belgium. But what happens as a family, you develop your own traditions. Yeah. You know, so it's, you actually wind up doing things you like to do. What, you know what I mean? It's hard though, because, like you said,

you have a kid. Now that I have Max, he wants Santa. He wants, but like next year, I want to try to get her to go away on Christmas because if we can get him out of that now, where hey, you can celebrate Christmas anywhere. Santa comes anywhere. We can go here and there or whatever

and then he can wake up and then come home, we can do a little something. Because I think it's, I think you're right, the tradition of it. You shouldn't feel alone, but it does feel good. It puts this pressure on you that is completely made up. And that's what I was annoyed about. I'm aware that this has made up.

Why am I putting these expectations on myself? I think it's religious goals. I think it's goals that they give us to keep going. Oh, for sure. I think it's like, okay, make it to Christmas as a kid. As a kid, and they get to use that on you too. If you're not good, blah, blah, blah. Thanksgiving, let's, if I can just,

I'll make it to Thanksgiving, then I'll make it to Christmas, then I'll make it to New Year's, then I'll make it to my birthday. I'll make it to her birthday. We'll make it to the summer. You know, all these little goals to get through your shit life. Sure. When in reality, you know, it's-

But you need to give people, that's why sometimes I'm reluctant to talk about these types of things because most people need that in their life and I don't wanna take that away from them. You know, sometimes you gotta like lie to people telling the truth. So it's like, if I start going, hey, your holidays are kind of meaningless

and they give you this false sense of hope and drive and expectation when in reality you have this shitty job. I can't, I don't wanna take that way. If you can't, then it's best to get dark. But somebody's looking at us going, what a fucking horrible life you guys have tried. And I'd rather than do that.

Like, I'd rather, that's better. Like, I'll take this on because I can handle it. But I don't know if a lot of people can handle it. So I don't wanna give it to that. But that's your truth. That's your truth. Their truth is that I love Christmas. I love decorating.

I love, I love baking. There's a lot of people. I've seen it. I've seen it. They didn't make that decision. That's what I was trying to say. When you see a house, there's a certain point in life that you, as an adult, say,

I don't want to do this anymore. Yeah. And there's just, I don't think everybody's cattle. Not that everybody's cattle is like, I think certain people like it. How do I say it? When I look at people that kill themselves, right? And it's like hilarious.

So it's like, I can lose her. We're gonna get to it. We're gonna get to it. But like, or not even kill themselves, like I look at Jim Carrey, right? And I wouldn't be surprised that he killed himself. But, and it's just because he reached this point of life where you kind of understand what life is, right? And I wouldn't be surprised he'd kill himself. But and it's just because like he reached this point of life where you kind of understand what life is, right?

And you understand that in way there's a lot of light, it's just kind of insignificant. And there's two ways to go with that street. Like one way is, it's significant. It's meaningless, we're a bunch of molecules. And then when you don't value anything, then you're like, ah, fuck, I might go kill yourself. Myself.

And then there's another way to go, which is like, how cool is that? Like, we're insignificant. We can enjoy. We can enjoy movies. Boom. Do some painting. Whatever. So there's two ways you could go.

I would love to. But I was saying, carry paints. But like, so I guess there's two ways to go to it. And that's why I'm kind of reluctant, maybe to talk about it, because I don't want somebody to go in that direction where like Jim looks like he's really struggling with it. And then there's some people'm kind of reluctant, maybe to talk about, because I don't want somebody to go in that direction where Jim looks like he's really struggling with it. And then there's some people that kind of like

wrap their head around it and they're just like, wow, this is fun. I don't laugh at the world. And he's really at peace with himself. He did some Indian shit up on the fucking mountain. I lost him. He did that shit up in the mountain for like a couple days. Yeah.

But you gotta be in a dark place to go to a mountain. Can I say something though, you know? Well, you were a mountain cause I'm doing well. But you become, you become, you become,. When you be have that much money though. Yeah It's it's funny to me how free you can get yo, but what happens? I'm saying no, I understand what you can never has to worry about he never ever Ever yeah Andrew ever has to worry about anything ever again that we have There's no anxiety and that's the problem. There's no anxiety in

this life. Is that you get to a completion and you have nothing to look at? No, no. This is what it is. It's like you stop having to survive and our brains usually function based on survival. So imagine someone took the carrot away from the horse. What does he do? Right? Right. You have to put the carrot on. Be the horse.

Pete the shit out of it. No, but so it's like, so there's so so I think what happens to these people who get really rich like that Lincoln Park dude, right? Like the Lincoln Park singer who killed himself, right? You're like, so there's, so I think what happens to these people who get really rich, like that Lincoln Park dude, right? Like the Lincoln Park singer who killed himself, right? You're like, why would he kill himself? Like, his, imagine your whole life, all you want to do is be famous, have a, you know, a fan base and tour around the world and the biggest arenas, et cetera, right?

And you're like, I'm miserable, but once I get that, I'ma be happy. And then imagine you got that shit. And you're not happy. And you weren't happy. Of course you were. Who would kill yourself? Andrew, no. No, but he nobody is but that's what you learn when you get there anybody is happy That's why I look at like I'm happy man. I look at pretty happy

I'm gonna say happy saying these people who are that chasing this shit all the time It's like how much money do you need? So that's it right there. What happens is so I think what you realize like when I've spoken to some wealthy people and I know you have to be wealthy to realize this but once you get everything you want you realize how meaningless it is. Now none of us right here having of money to go possessions and money is meaningless. We don't have enough yet, but rich people, they get to that point and they go, oh, this shit, we're just filling ourselves

to feel good or whatever it is, right? Well, yeah, but we're the, you said that because I came home off the road a couple of months ago, and it was dark out and I walked up and I looked in my house and I saw my, I think it was before Christmas and they were decorating the tree, my son and my wife. And I walked up, because I was coming home.

I was going to go, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I was just like, fuck them happy. I'm like, I'm like, I am so, I'm like, I'm looking in, I'm like, this driveways mind, that rock is mine. I'm looking in and seeing my kid and my wife and I'm like, I've never, ever been this happy, ever. Dude, and I was like, I was literally just sitting there

owning like looking at my life that I created. And I was like, this is the fucking best shit ever. That's when the world gives you shit. I know this sounds like silly, but- Literally? Literally, the world is moving apparently they didn't want it. I don't know what the fuck. I'm not saying, I give it, but like, okay. I know this sounds like silly but literally the world is moving apparently they didn't want it Like okay, you know how like Kobe really wants a boy

What Kobe Brian he really wants a sweet. I just look at me. No, I don't know. All right Whatever he keeps having daughter no circle. He keeps having daughters, right? Like he just keeps having daughters He keeps having daughters, right? Like he just keeps having daughters. He keeps having actors. Doesn't even ask the women. Just wants the baby, right? He just, I don't know the line, I've missed it. Does he rape someone? I say he doesn't even, yeah.

Oh, I'll get my baby. I'm not gonna get my baby raped someone that I've missed it. So it's like, don't email me, I don't give a fuck. Fuck. He's like, no, he didn't, like, I know. I don't give a fuck. So it's like, but I feel like that's an example of like,

you're not being grateful enough. Like Kobe, no Kobe, right? Kobe's literally accomplished everything he's ever wanted. He's got this beautiful family, and he's like, run you to boy, but I need a boy. And I think that's like sometimes the universe or God or whatever, it's just tapping in a shoulder like, yo, sit the fuck down and appreciate

the Christmas tree in your living room and your wife and kid putting the shit on it. And I feel like once you find gratitude and what you have, then you start getting shit. Can I say something about this? Can I say something about this? There's show, baby. This is what you want. I mean, me making this stupid thing, right?

It's great. I'm a comic. No, no, no, no, I'm a comic. You're telling yourself that. We could. One of the best. I know. We do this gig that we do and we have to have some type of,

I don't know, we're comics, we make fun of it. You don't do this, you don't do that, blah, blah, blah. And it's like, you know what, I'm done, I'm done with the boundaries that I put on myself so that my fellow comedians are the fan base that I have. That would be you. I'm done with that because it's like okay because you're stifling my creativity.

Now if I decide to get weird with acting or painting or movies it doesn't matter because I need to fucking do that. So even this thing I knew I'm gonna take a hit on it. I knew someone might fit it. But it's like I have to do this now because time's running the fuck out.

And I cared a lot about what people thought about. Yeah. And now it's like, it's not that I don't care about people because I do. I just, I care more about what I wanna do. You know what I mean? And not have these, you get the matrix, man. You've seen it.

You're in a, you're in a neo. You're not in, you're not in it. I'm being serious. I don't know what body, I don't know what body to a birthday party for. I'm not on the roof to surprise party, whatever. I wasn't invited. You were there.

I was not there. It was a couple of years ago. You were there then. I was invited, I didn't go. Yeah, anyhow, it was a fun. What proof? It was at a bar, anyhow, my daughter helped her plan it, my little daughter. So I get to everybody else surprised,

but to look at my daughter's face, that she, like I was like, the, you can't even pay for that. That was a gift. That look, what she ran up to me, like, look what I did when mommy was a million dollar look. You know, that happiness in her face. I mean, I pushed her to the side, but I was cake.

And the same, like my daughter's basketball, I used to go to my daughter's games. See, there's certain things in life that bring, you know, I'm a consequence of that. This is why I did comics of fucking the best, because I think, you know, you take a start, we're all engaged in this fuck story, right? Yeah. We're all sitting like, what? And at some point, instinctually, he finds a funny thing that's totally fucked up to say. But you say it, and we're like, oh fuck, it snaps us out of it, where I do think that that is, we're the only breed of entertainer or creative person that is able to do that. Um, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's like trying to, when I try to describe as people,

I don't even think they understand, like there's always people outrage about everything all day, right? They're outrage about like, it can significantly shit all day, right? And here we are finding joy in the darkest shit, comics, and not only do we find joy in it for ourselves, but we find a way where you can find joy in the dark shit.

Everybody finds joy in the happiness. We can find joy in the dark shit. Everybody finds joy in the happiness. We can find joy for ourselves and you. We're giving everybody happiness in the darkest form. Okay. We're like fucking gift. Yeah, but we're, we're exactly the shoe, baby. But here's the thing is that we're, we're taking these, we're being, as ex, we're, we're being so vulnerable.

We're being, we look at you think it, you hide it, you fear it. We go on stage in front of you and figure out a way to tell you so you can laugh and relate to it. My cry on a podcast. Who? Oh my cry, yeah. He's doing great by the way. We raised money, $2600.

I thought you'd let that go. I would tell you, you don't. think you don't drink right by the way 26 hundred bucks we raised Wow What happened to your dog? He's gonna die hold on what happened to your dog? He's gonna die here's a two-murs how much is a new dog? 2500 you could get a brand new dog Jesus Christ How long if you won you all had the dog 25 years 25 years 25 I wouldn't be raising money for that be crazy

The dog's a hundred ninety seven I mean like if my wife had a dude I can always find another wife I always still try to raise money for her Okay, I mean know what I mean all right, that's fair, that's fucked up. Okay. I feel bad, I was just trying to get a good laugh. You said, it's all the wrong laugh. I feel bad. I'm gonna be using him.

Don't feel bad, but that's, I don't know, I think that we should deserve way more credit for that. I think we're underappreciated, and I shouldn't be asking for credit because that's too bad, I should just be grateful that we get to do this for a living, and I'm working on that, but I guess what I want people to know is like, we turn horrible situations for people into fucking joy.

But it's not up, but you can't look at it. I agree with you 100%. But not all comics take horrible shit and make it funny. Some guys just take normal regular fucking everyday horse shit and are funny with it. But I think the thing that we do is that the comedy club is the safe space.

The comedy club is the place you go. For us, for us. And you know, everybody can go and laugh, hang on, I get what you're saying. Can go and laugh at racism, sexism, fucked up shit, said in a fucking funny way and then you can leave and go I thought that but I didn't want to say I thought that was funny Everybody can laugh at fucking crazy fucked up shit and then go back to your job and knock it fired you do all that shit in my car Give us say I'm saying that the comedy club is the club is the place, is the safe place to do it. But you don't fucking need a room,

you don't need a fucking, you know, a group. We've always been the person to do that and make you laugh at the fucking crazy shit. And they want us out though. No, they want you out. They're attacking us. They are, they don't understand why they're doing it. That's why I feel bad for them.

You know, it's like, it's a very small percentage that's there. It is a very small percentage, but if the percentage has power, really doesn't matter how small it is. They do have power. I don't know how much longer, but you are right. Like a safe space should be a place where people are safe

to like share their ideas. Not one that's safe from ideas. It's funny that even Louis this week, it's like the fact that they, somebody stole his fucking, his act, stole it. Unready, it's not done, it's his work in progress. They just took it and put it out for the world to judge. I thought it was done.

It's not, no, it's not done. No, I know. It's not fair. Number one, to judge it, because it might not be done. It's, yeah, it's not, no, it's not done. No, I know. And it's not, but it's not, it's not fair. Number one, to judge it, because it might not be done. That's illegal. But that joke might not make the final time. I've done jokes. I've had jokes that I was at the two years in.

I was like, I don't wanna do that anymore. That's not funny, I fucked up. I went too far. It never worked or it did work. And now I'm not into it. I've changed my mind. You never gave him the fucking opportunity To finish his work. We're judging the sculpture before it's finished

Yeah, and it's and it's unfortunate to do that like nobody would like to vlog for it They're really not going after that. They're going after the fact that they don't like how he Apologized that's what they're going after they're going after the fact that he didn't pay enough He give the pound of flesh. The joke is just, what do you call a part of what they want from him? It's a symptom of him. I don't think so. Let me tell you what I think.

I can just agree with you if you want. Go, go, go. What do you think? I think that they want Louis back. I think they want their old Louis back. Who? I think they want the guy that they loved back. Oh, you think that this material's that different than is old stuff?

Well, I think it is. I think it's a little different. It's a little harder. He's doubling down. He's doing what the fuck he wants to do. I think that they want, they want to love Louis again. But they don't think so. Okay, because they want him to apologize.

I think you're right. I think you're both right. They want him to apologize. They want him to go, please. No, they want him to do it on state. They want him to write material down there. It doesn't matter. That's what I'm saying.

They want him to address it so they can have him back. Yeah, I don't think so. I think they've been on blood and I think that he's a perfect example of why you should never publicly apologize. Because public apology is just confirm whatever suspicions people have of you. So, but what if you're wrong? What if you do something you're wrong?

Well, here's the problem, right? If I asked the random person on the street, hey, what did Louis do to those women that accused, right? I bet Nine-Ned telling them he locked them in a room and jerked off all over them. That's what they would say. So when he apologizes for what he did, right? They think it's for that.

They think it's for what they believe he did. So of course these women and dudes hate them because they're in their head. He's like, oh, he just confirmed it. He locked them and tied them up and jerked off all over him. So they're like, I hate this guy. Why is he out there on Long Island do a show still? So you never publicly apologize ever is mean. People that are doing that, there is people that are doing even worse than that. What? Doing what like like a Cosby or a Harvey Weinstein. So if they apologize, it doesn't matter

after you rate so many girls, but you're going, huh? Or one? One is the number. Yeah, that's a good point. No, you're right. You're right, no, that's what she is. She used to do that. Three. Three're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're right. You're, when you're wrong and you probably admit it and apologize, you're not doing it for them.

You're basically doing it for yourself too. So you don't make that mistake again. And I'll stop you though right there. He did apologize. Yeah, I just hate it. Horrible, horrible decision to apologize. In my personal opinion, horrible decision. You can personally apologize to every single one of those people. But if you say he didn't apologize, he didn't apologize.

He apologized for making somebody uncomfortable. He apologized. making somebody uncomfortable. He apologized. If you look at the apology, you're right about nobody. I actually, I talked to a girl Madison was constant at a cigar bar. I was just late at night and she had the same, exactly what you said.

I said, did you read the article? Yes, I did. Okay, what happened? And she said this, this and that. And I was like, that's not what the article said. She goes, I go, did you read the article? She goes, no. She's just going on what she said. And then and that. And I was like, that's not what the article said. She goes, I go, did you read the article? She goes, no. She's just going on what she said.

And then when we read the article, it was like, she was like, oh, I didn't know that. I didn't understand. I don't know anything. People just go by shit, right? You just go with whatever, it's like confirmation bias, whatever you feel inside. And people say that justifies that feeling you believe.

Like nobody's doing research. I think it, I think, I don't think. I don't think. Who never apolog apologize is who is the number one guy who never apologize don't have and has he ever been in trouble for it never you don't apologize publicly it's useless do you know what i got what he had to say uh... i'm at the go i mean it's hard is a lot of not a lot of layers here

i had to go uh... anyways it feels like we brought up a lot of like i got a go I had to go anyways it feels like we brought up Louis and I'm like I gotta go But I love Louis and oh there's my dates look at that. I'm in Chicago next week Xanies I'll be there when we hang out at 1819 and then the week after that comedy on state in Madison Yeah, doing very well. I'm very grateful. That's why I'm leaving before we start talking about this Comedy castle. I mean you can't go down from there. Okay, that's a good club. Comedy castle. Yeah, and Detroit, always fun.

It's in Royal Oak. Wow. Oh, that's like this. No, I like that guy. I like that guy. No, I wish I could hang. Maybe I'll come back up after my second. Come back up, still going.

Alright, I love you guys. Thank you. Bye Joe. Alright, we're gonna take, we got Vaughn, DeCarlo's coming in. Hey, what's happening Vaughn? Hi. You're taking Joe's place. Come on and sit down.

Let me put myself in. So it's a tough thing, man. Yeah, absolutely. But it's like, let's talk about this sexual assault with a woman in the room now. Well, we had a few. They were rolling their eyes. They were all rolling their eyes. But, maybe... Hi, Andrew.

How are you? Hi, everybody. Let's bring the plan. Vaughn's got a show. She's headlining. What is it called? Oh, uh, Caroline's the breakout comedy series. Von is headlining next week. It's on a Tuesday. It's at 730. She is. The breakout artist comedy series, Von DeCarlo. Next week, make sure you get your tickets now.

Who's on the show with you? Christina Hutchinson is featuring and Reggie Conquest is hosting. Hey, I like both of those people. con bolotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca, espectacularismos, numentos, rincones de película y un sincindia aventuras te esperan. ¡Friparás! Vuelades de Madrid, Amurcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Tarifa sujeta a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com. I am so out of breath. Walking the stairs.

Oh, my God. I get like 30 pounds. I'm so fat right now. I can't breathe. Now I'm talking my business. I'm going on. I'm going to advice what do I do. Oh, you're looking at it. If you want to make it...

We've been up and down in wait. I've seen his different. He gave you advice on how to make a short movie. Stop it. Just. Just follow the film. Just because it's not doing it doesn't mean he doesn't know how. Thank you. You have lost it before many times.

And I'm losing weight now. Oh, really? You down? How much are you down? I'm down three pounds. That's fucking great, man. I can just do a pound of weight. I'm up in 30 pounds. I can do man. I just do a pound a week I'm 30 pounds in six months

Nobody feels bad for me or believe me because it fell into places that people find attracted yeah, but what but I can't breathe like my boots And my booty and thighs and stuff is just too much. I can't believe people buy this stuff. What you saying? You're not gonna like me, booties. Well, that's what I meant by people, boss. Oh, snap. You meant my people. Shabbat Shalom, why are you bringing a bar Kelly?

No, I left a view. Oh, it's trying to find. Shit, you are our Kelly. But here's the thing. Can I say this, Bobby, though, I should be happy because I'm getting more success as the almost fat girl. I booked the GNC commercial. Which is a great thing is running everywhere.

But here's the casting call. Women 35 plus that look like they could stand to lose 10 to 15 pounds. How about this? And then I booked it. How about this? I fucking get booked it. I love it. I fucking get her money. I was in an audition.

I've told the story before, and the lady picks up her sides and she goes, what the fuck? And I'm like, what's wrong? She goes, can't they just give her a name? And I just, I read her sides and said fat chick. Oh wow. See? They can't do that shit anymore, but they back in the day.

I can't day, it's so weird., but they're back in the Nidda. I can't day. It's so weird. People are so sensitive about it. Well, that's your thing. You can attack a skinny girl, but you can't attack. You can attack a skinny guy or girl, but if you attack a fat person, well, what happens?

You can't say nothing. But here's the problem. When they go, that's fat-gaming. Okay. But you can go after a heronatic or an alcoholic, which is in addiction, and which same is cool. It's all an addiction. But, but, no, you can still stop.

You can still, I get fat shamed. I get made fun of, for being fat, every fucking day. Good. And, 21, because you're a bi- I don't do shit. I don't, nobody says shit. You shouldn't, they shouldn't say shit. Why?

Why not? Well, if you can't make fun of fucking, we should make fun of everybody Why why not well if you can't make fun of fucking We should make fun of everybody. Yeah, but if you can't make listen my point is this if you can't make fun of sex or Race or anything, but you can still make fun of fat people you can make fun of everything Why the fuck why does it okay? You can't say something about a girl You can't say something about a black person can't see somebody can't say people saying you can't you can't you can't you can't see somebody black purse, get somebody gay purse. Who are these people saying you can't, you can't, you can't. The last, the part, what are you talking about? People are getting fired.

I would say. That's what I mean. Who are these people that's forcing these people to get fired for telling jokes? Like why is comedy under the attack? I've got pussy grabbing president. A weather man, a weather man just got fired in Rochester for saying Martin Luthercoon during his fucking. He fucked up. He fucked up.

He fucked up. And then he tried to cover it up. He tried to cover it up. It's so it's it's just how he goes Martin Luther Koon. And he goes, oh, I talk so fast. I didn't mean to fuck out of here. You can't get out of that. That means you said that before.

You he goes, oh, I just I got tongue tied. He said, you know, get the fuck out out of here you can't come back from it You know just right King Martin Luther King I'm not gonna even try it. It was a story. Roger. Go right. He just got fired. He might he might have fucked that up No, you can't fuck that up Is that him? Play it and have it ready to go um Yeah, it's, that's fine. That's the thin line.

That's the thin line. I mean, again, our president is the, our example, right? He has a whole line of stuff that he needs to apologize for before comedian needs to apologize. Yeah, but that's like saying Freddie, if Freddie Fag Mercury, you know what I mean? That's, that's, that's pretty on the nose with the gold.

No, not meaning this guy. I mean, just in general, in general. Got a fight. How do you go home? You know, most weather guys are gay. Are they? Yeah. Man, most weather guys are gay.

Where did that stack right from? That's a loose stack. Why? I lived with a gay guy back in Boston, and he was studying to be a weather guy. And one day he goes, you know, most of us are gay. And I was like, what? And then every time I watched the weather, I was like, oh, I'm asking. What's him champion? What about Mr. G? Is Mr. G gay? Not all. How do you know how? You know that about Sam Campiand. I believe like right now, that's the only

thing that like, I think gay, think gay comics, they're getting away with saying stuff that, like, if you're a straight comic, you can't say that. Yeah, but so do black comics can get away with more than, than, than, like, and so Indian comics. I see Indian comics, yeah. I see Indian comics now playing the fucking, doing the, uh, people of color card. They're trying to jump on the black man wagon, you know, they're calling themselves people of color.

Brown. And, and they're calling them, you know, the white people going after the white man. You have to fuck up. You know, you don't have the same struggle as black people, Indian people. They don't, what was the struggle of Indian people in this country? You got picked on, maybe as a kid, but they don't have a struggle like black people or fucking Jews. You can't say that. Yes, I've asked them. I've asked, I've talked to many Indian cops. I go, is there a struggle in the Indian community? And they said no. Okay, so I did my research.

So I did my research. And they mentioned the other guy that, to the hair. I think there's, I think there's an argument to be said that like, nobody should complain who chose to come here. What? Like black people didn't choose to come. No, I mean like people in general, like by being choose to come here, right?

So you have every right to complain about your treatment. But if you knew America was racist and you were like, yo, let's go. Don't be upset. The motherfuckers are racist, right? If I go to a Chinese restaurant, they serve them wontons, I can't be like, yo. Are you getting more black because of vans in the room? Maybe. No, but I'm not serious.

I mean, I just noticed. I'm not serious in this thing. Yo, motherfuckers, yeah, yo, be. You know what's funny? You know what's funny? I've been speaking with my hands the whole episode. Right, even the beginning, they're like, are you throwing up gang signs,

but you think somebody's changed because she's, okay. But, but uh but bullshit motherfucker fuck that do you a thing right do you but it is a weird thing you okay here's a question let's just play this real quick I gotta get this let's hear this guy it's just the coming up oh god oh yeah great Oh

Yes Yeah, listen All the time you can you can hear him. He's like Martin Luther kit kit. Whoops yet Straight He was like yeah guys, yeah, I'm coming back from that. You don't have to say it. I'm about. Is he? If you called Martin Luther King a Koon, that means that you'd be saying that he wasn't doing enough for black people. You'd be saying that he was a sell out. A sell out. So maybe he's a Malcolm guy Sorry, but I'm more of a Malcolm guy I'm militant. I really think that

I should say if you're black A couple of black who's like nah fuck without way boy He went back to his launch though and there was high five His last name is seven X Look at this white policy video hey everybody Jerry cattle she's a question I brought here and I would tell you what has happened last Super base since my weathercast on Friday oh man he's in a crowd before we get to that I do want to take the time to thank you Stop one second who she looking at who she looks at looking into the future she's looking at her father. She's looking into the future.

She's looking for her new black husband. Can we just say this? Everybody doing fucking Instagram or videos on YouTube's? Look into the camera. Stop looking at yourself. Sorry, man. Oh, when I FaceTime, I can't always look at myself. I know, I can't stand your fuck.

I look at your mom kidding. Good Good. Friends for the enormous amount of support that given us some very very beginning. I want to take the time to think our neighbors. You know, we just had our neighbors over here just a few minutes ago. Oh, white neighbors. Nothing but love support, hugs and tears and we couldn't be doing this without you guys. Thank you to our church for reaching out. tears and we couldn't be doing this without you guys. Thank you to our church for reaching out. Without stop. He said it. He said it. Yeah. But I said it. And I like to thank the Aaron brotherhood.

Is that the church you mean? I want to hear his explanation. Go a little bit. Go a little bit. We continue to support throughout the four year. Why such a long face? I need your touch up. I love it. I love it. I have to the tears. I need your love and the thought. Oh, there they are. There they are. She tried to get one out.

No, no, fast forward, fast forward. Go to about like two, 15 years. There you go. Want to touch the reputation. That's such a great man. It's Dr. Martin Luther King. I'm so sorry. You don, what if we said it again? I was waiting.

Stop right there. You know how fun it is. I would have been like, I would never tarnish the great name of Dr. Martin Luther clan. I mean, I mean, I came to you and you're cool. And I mean, fuck. Fuck.

I hate black people. Oh, I said it. Oh, I just started making out. Fuck I hate black people They just started making out He does remind me of Kevin all like like beer like he could stop saying I like beers like we get it look at him You know that she's a cuck You know she's had she's had his black friend over. Oh, look at that, right? You're right. That's a cock couple right there.

He's fucking had a nice black sack stuck in his face. Go ahead, play a little bit. Let's discuss it. I never do that. Okay, you're talking to your Bobby? I mean. Jesus Christ, I'm sorry, dude. I apologize. If you're watching watching this what's his name again?

Jeremy capley capley Paul jazz. It was a joke. God. Yeah, he's a patreon Not anymore get afforded almost 20 years. I can't spend a dollar a month anymore about it Of this science now this woman think this woman in this thing. She a fucking magic actress, sister. And he was a little over a year ago. Stop, she's watching, she's watching black guys jerk off on a screen. He's saying, what did he put her in this fucking thing? All right.

Now she's a target and fucking idiot. Because this serial killer can't shed a tear. He needed to lie to fuck it up. Toilet, he. No, she's fucked, man. Look at that. He's testosterone's jacked up. Look at that.

He's got Joe Rogan's fucking facial hair. He ain't crying. Oh, dude, he is. Go ahead. We're going to watch. I'm turning broad. So you're going to watch, Shester, with this one point that my career could end this way.

What do you think was a more boring format? Why is this so loud? Yeah. I'm trying to television station. You know what I'm going to have to say. Boring for men. Why is this so loud? You know what this should be called alone Bro Dude this chick is in bird box. You're just staring. Hold back.

She's fucking. She's a hostage. She has not. She hasn't blinked. In the meantime, I don't think she has. All right, all right, all right. Come on, come on, come on, come on. I think she's kind of good looking.

Yeah, she's pretty. She let her hair down and found somebody with a job. You can't say that and get out of it. Don't go on there and do that because people are going, we don't believe you. It's just a waste of luck. They're gonna dig through his Twitter timeline. Just cut your losses.

I'm gonna cut your losses. It's over. You gotta act over it. You don't apologize that you act over your... Guys, it was over. You got to act over it. You don't apologize. You act over your act. Guys, it was a mistake. It was a stupid mistake.

You got a horrible mistake. I said a word that I would never want to say. Like, who hasn't? The public. The public. Yeah, a lot of TV. People haven't said words and we didn't mean to say all the time. Like, you just act like it's the most absurd thing to do.

And then people go, okay, another bit. All right, how would you handle it? How would I handle it? I would get my paintbrush and start painting houses. I go back to painting because even Stern said this, he's in the smallest market, he's a Rochester. Oh boy, you can't go low, where do you go from there? But keep see, what the fuck?

Well, why did you get fired? Right, I mean, he is in a position where his actual job is to be good with words. So that's, I mean, yeah, I think I would take. Yeah, I would just, I would literally get on TV and go, look, you crazy. If you think I do really think I would say that on TV. He did though. And Rochester, do you know how many? On people live here? Yes, especially Rochester. Yeah, it's like. I think I would say that on TV. He did though. And Rochester, do you know how many other people live here? Yeah, especially Rochester.

Yeah, that's like a, yeah. And then he would go back down. And then he would go too many. Listen. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. My point is this. There's a black guy watching that

like, oh, that was a guy I cut off earlier. I started this whole shit. I told him to suck my black hair. That was a guy cut off earlier I started this whole shit I told him to suck my black hair Just screaming crude on the way to work Then he pulls it and looks wrong Gary, nothing, nothing we're good Everything's going to get good Roll it roll it Let's go on Martin Coon shit

Get out of that Fucking asshole There's no company, they're not gonna keep him on, they're not gonna go, they should. Look man, he shouldn't fight, he fucked up. That's a fucking major fuck up.

That's not, yeah, but it wasn't intentional. Judge people in there intent, not your interpretation of it. Yeah, man, can I say something that you can go on YouTube right now and find a million of these, where people have said, fucked up racist, misogynistic, crazy shit on air,

because you're reading into a teleprompter all day long, and maybe he went cool-hunting. Maybe he liked raccoons. Maybe he was raccoons, maybe he was a raccoon in his garbage. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Uh, not a big driveway. Yeah. Anybody, anybody has said in one book. Let's say he's racist, right? Let's say, hypothetically speaking, he's racist. You're allowed to be privately racist. You can have your own opinion. I agree. You just can't, you can't impose your racism on people.

And if he's going right there and he's saying, look, man, I made a mistake. I would never want to do that. I completely apologize. I don't know why I came out. It was just so dumb. I can't believe that. That's it. As long as he's not out there actively being racist

and holding down black people. Here's the thing though, you never give somebody. We are so, we jump, take everything away, and then deal with it. You know, it's like, Rosanne, take it away. Goodbye. Fuck it. Rosanne's response was the best. Which one?

She goes, she goes, I didn't know the bitch was black. She didn't say that she doesn't look like the plan of the Apes person. She never took that back. She's like, I just didn't know she was black. But I mean, she didn't look like a Jewish lady. She did. I could see her mistake in her for Jewish. It wasn't like it was Vaughn.

I mean, she looked like an old Jewish lady. I don't, I'm not sure if that's how it happened. Bring up the lady. The question is not whether she looked like an old Jewish lady. The question is whether she looked like the plan of the apes thing. Okay, let's make the judge right now. I just didn't like it.

You're gonna put the pictures together. I'm gonna stand trying to hide behind it in joke form. Did she yes? Look joke that was joke she she looks like if this and that that's a classic joke I would think I I miss they killed I miss you look Andrew look at that you don't think she looks like an old Jewish lady sure She look Andrew look at that. You don't think she looks like an old Jewish lady sure Yeah, is that her on the right the side by side Oh, that's what I'm saying you know I'm looking okay, none of us can say this only Vaughn can say it or a lot of us were in trouble

But you want to you basically want to pick a picture right in the middle in the middle and the middle all to the right Over to the right the one with all three. Yeah, click on that In the middle in the middle in the middle all to the right over to the right the one with all three. Yeah click on that Yo son, that's all on Vaughan you know what at the end of the day at the end of the day Vaughan human beings all of us look like that. We all came from that If that's not exclusive to black people real quick, she said she would like guys don't you in the mic please don't you tell me what you do? Sorry, no because I am an asshole Fucking idiots honestly like but the all three of them you know, I mean all three of them You know, I mean both of them Roseanne and I just think that I just wanted the middle to best looking

I just think that I just wanted the middle to be like monkey It's like you can't even say okay, you're saying you fucked up say you know what I fucked up I'm sorry. I would never do that. I apologize and do a an episode about it or have the lady on the show and Keep us unified and keep us moving forward and let us deal with it. This was you she should have said. She should have said, I think that's what she looks like. I don't think all black people look like that. I didn't even know that she was black. I think that she specifically looks like that. If she said that, if she said, like stomped it, stood on it right there.

If she said it, I don't know, you're black. What would you, what would you react to? Like you could tell people that you're being black. And if she goes, I don't know, you're black, what would you do? Would you react to it? You could tell. And if she goes, check my record, check my record in terms of my whatever. And if she had a good record for, you know, not being racist? At the end of the day, feel how you feel racist or not.

I just hate the idea that we're shutting down all conversations about it unless you agree with the majority. Like you can't do this, you can't do that, you can't say that, you can't say that. Like are these people who are shutting people down, do they really want to have a conversation? No. They want the problem to be. It's almost like evangelistic. It's almost like they want a pure society of nobody, nobody hurting anybody ever, ever again, which okay, I understand what that means, but that's not fun. Yeah, but the person that they went after.

No, you have not seen Vita one that cast the first stone, right? Great. Praise Jesus. Who Aimee, you want me to sing to you? Yeah, wait a minute. He went after Ellen for sticking up for Kevin Hart. Yeah. Yeah.

Because she actually want to have a conversation. But the black gay community went after Ellen saying who those? The black gay far left community. Not the liberals. Not the fucking in the little people. It's usually the far left or the far right. It's far. It's always extremist. But the far I don't even hear from the far right anymore. And here's the thing. He's in office. He tweets. Here's the thing. That was his office. He's in office. He tweets. Here's the thing.

As a black person, like you go on, then wanting after that, let her into that. She's black. As a black person, I don't give every black person don't get a pass. Like I wish I would hear Stacy dash say the end word. I'm going to take it the same way as a white person saying it. Every black person is culturally in that clip, when the Chris Rock, Louis thing. Now whoever posted that clip,

I wanna see what happened before that, because I saw a lot of people saying, oh, you should be such a huge fan of you, Chris Rock, but I'm not anymore. And in my mind, I was like, well, if you were a huge fan of Chris Rock, then you know his very classic legendary bit about black people versus negative.

That's what Louie is referring. It sounded to me like, in prior to that moment, he said something about that content. But they're best friends. They're friends forever. He wrote on a show, Pudi Tang. I mean, they've been together forever. Of course, he was referring to that bit. Exactly.

Of course he was. And if you were a big fan, you saw that 10 years ago. 10 years ago. And HBO said, we love it. Let's do it. Because times are different. HBO wouldn't air today, though. That's what it went with.

That wouldn't air today. But that's the thing where we got to be careful, when we let them into our world. Because they were all for them talking as comics They weren't talking as like white guys and a black dude right and when you're talking as comics certain things fly that don't really fly with civilians and We have to understand like we have to understand the climate like at that point in time We thought that they understood who we are and it's up to us

I guess to not back away from that shit. Like, comics gotta come out when that happens and goes, yo, this is what we do. Like, we have a comradery, we have a comfort where we can talk about this shit. If you can't, that's on y'all. But don't come at Chris. I didn't even understand coming at Chris. Like, what is he supposed to do, punch Louis in the face?

But listen, what would be okay? But Andrew, there's a group that's gonna come after Chris, there's a group that's gonna go after Louis, there's a group that's gonna go after Louis, there's a group that's gonna go after fucking Ricky, there's a group that's gonna go after HBO, there's some... Nobody's gonna have to sign, Pelt. There is, there is, absolutely, there's a group going,

what a pussy. No, they love sign, oh, oh yeah. There's a group going after every single, and now with this social media shit, we hear them all and it just it demands who has the power. It goes back to that who they have the power right now. Whatever has it. Yeah, the people are reading their jokes. I'm like any joke red is horrible. It's out of content.

Patrice is the funniest thing ever. We talked about that before when he did that, the pirate joke. Thank you pirate. The lady wrote fucking arg and when you read it, the angry pirate, and the lady wrote fucking arg, and when you read it, you like, they're like, everybody, they read it on the TV show and she went, and he ejaculated and almost faced, she hopped around and one night, and went arg, and you heard the camera guy go, and he's like, why are you laughing?

You're supposed to be outre. The greatest clip ever on TV. And it exposes the fucking hypocrisy and the people that aren't funny are trying to tell all of us what's funny. And that's fucked up. The camera guy knows funny. When I say who are these people,

you're not a typical audience member of a comedy show. When you say who are these people, we think cypals in the room. Who are these people? who are these people we think cypals in the room Who are these people See I tried to see what it is right this is at least how I look at it It's a grab it resources, right? So it's like there are people that aren't that funny in my estimation Comics he left he left and I love them and like they because they can't do a style of humor that we can do, right? And instead of attempting to do it, what they do is they make that style of humor radioactive.

So now anybody who does that style of humor is a piece of shit, is a racist, is a sexist, is a misogynist, right? And that's their way of getting us out the paint so that they can get all the deals or special whatever the fuck it is. Keep it in 40-year-old white guy terms, the paint, I got it. Basketball, right? Basketball existed for you too.

Let me see. Let me see, man. It's like, it's no different. Baseball maybe next time. But it's no different than like, poor people, of course they want to tax rich people more because you want to get some money. And rich people, of course you want to get tax less because you want to get some money and rich people of course you want to get

tax less because you want to keep your money and that's fine can I can I put it to it can I say something real quick here's a deal there's I've been saying this if you look around there's funny people I think everybody in this room we're funny with if comedy never existed in our lives, we're just funny. Therefore, when we go on stage, we're bringing that to the stage, then there's people that tell jokes. And they're funny. People laugh,

industry loves them, TV loves them, nobody knows the difference. Eyes, but you're not funny when you're not off that. You're not funny. Nobody knows the difference. Eyes, but you're not funny when you're not off that. You're not funny. Give us some names. No. You're fired.

I mean, look, man, I'm not saying that one's better than the other, but to me. To me, if you're not funny at the table, if you're not funny at the table. Don't say the table, because everybody goes, I'm saying, if you're not funny, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm laughing on a bus with Patrice I've laughed in a corner eating pizza with burr

I've I've I've fucking cracked the fuck up on a plane with gain that rhymes. I don't know how I made that Give us a train I like you how you describe their bank accounts with there are On a bus with Patrice. Like, shit with Dane. Yes. But there are naturally funny people that try to do stand-up comedy and suck. Yeah, we all know that.

We all have funny friends that are like so naturally funny. They're actually bad at stand-up because funny comes so easy to them. They don't put the work in. Right. It's a different brain. It's like some people have a brain for them. Look, you're actually bad at stand up because funny comes so easy to them. They don't put the work in. Right. It's a different brain. It's like some people have a brain for the rest of it. Look, you're absolutely right. I don't know a lot of funny people know about the working, but there's still funny mother

fuckers. There's a lot of not funny people doing stand up and doing fucking well. I want to say the joke. Can I add in the joke? It's a math formula. It's a math formula and some people can figure it out. Here's how I look't know. You're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying, you're saying There's there's all different types of music like there's all different styles of comedy to each of them What are black people and to me? Cat Williams is one of the funniest fucking people out there, but they're not gonna go after his language

What you know what I mean because he's he gets a pet but there is gonna be black Conservatives that will start to attack guys like cat ways who you can't get funnier then. You know what I mean? It's you're going to start going after. You know what it is? It's just a it's a free for all. Here's a thing, right? I don't totally agree with the your idea about like there are different types of human, right? I actually think humor is objective or subject. Whatever the one is where it's like, it just is. And what I mean by that is like, you could just tell,

now I'm not knocking like everybody who's ever been on Comedy Central, right? But like, your job is to sell funny and if people are watching your channel, then that means you're not selling funny. Now, we all have very good friends that are on Comedy Central. Can I back you up on, back them up on the real quick though,

is that Comedy Central has a demographic, they have analytics, they have a job, they have things are selling. So they can't just go by funny, they have to go. I, I, I don't know their brand. I mean, their biggest issue is not knowing their brand. I think what happens is a lot of these networks, they got really fat when there was a certain amount of TV channels out. Right. When we, when it was just cable and there was no internet,

everybody was eating, right, because it was just like, it was like owning a basketball team. There's only 28 teams you're gonna have to watch. Right, so then what happened, the internet came out and people started putting their shit out on the internet and now there was a lot more competition. And then all of a sudden the places that were getting fat

because that was the only place you could go do it, they started getting real thin, right? And back in the day, when you're fat, you can go, I wanna have progressive ideals with my comedy. You could make that decision when you're making tons of money. It's like here in America, we can think about being progressive and caring about everybody's rights

because we're eating. But in Haiti, they're not like, well, how do we respect trans people? They're like, how do I not eat dirt? Yeah. Just don't eat it. What else is there to eat? I can't.

Those are yeast. Come on, bro. So it was like mic's dogs. So it's like, so it's just one of those things where it's like, you know, the internet has created more of a meritocracy with comedy. So now you gotta be funny, funny in order for people to see your shit. Well, I think it's getting weird because people are deciding what's not what's not popular.

It's funny funny. But people are deciding what's not acceptable. Not meant like social media. You just said, you're the grand famous for. They like you. They like you. And then, but are they really, can they do a solid act? But they're not selling it now But they're not selling it. They're not selling it. I'm telling them I'm just, just standing. There's people saying that what Louis said, Louis' joke is unacceptable and he shouldn't be able to say it.

It's nonsense. There's people saying, there's comics saying that. There's not comics. There's another comics. That's crazy. But it's not comics like you people are comics. You have to check every single line of your own shit. No, but you's there. I'm going to tell you. You're going to tell me. I'm going to tell you. You have to check every single line of your own. No, no, but you're going to check.

I'm going to tell you. No, you're going to be saying someone can't say something. If you go after the first amendment on another comic, you're only hurting yourself. Exactly. You could say that's not funny to me, but you can't say, don't do it.

There's funny and unfunny jokes. There's those things that's a topic you can talk about. And that's what people need to realize. But people are starting to, people are starting to say bullshit on you comics. You don't get to say what you want. I've heard this from you. Yeah, we do. Nope, I'm gonna tell you what I've heard.

No, I know what you heard. People said you don't get to say what you want. You can't say the end word. Don't care how funny it is. You can't talk about children's death. It doesn't matter. Fuck you. Those days are done.

And looking Canada, they fucking prosecute people. In England, they go to fucking, you get jailed. Okay, it's happening. Well, they don't have First Amendment in Canada or England. But, but I'm saying, is that freedom of speech, they have freedom of expression, but yeah. But they're putting people, they're literally banning people from making a living

because they set a certain thing that other people don't like. And all of this trial by social media and all this little pick away our First Amendment right? Eventually what people don't notice right now is as they're pointing a finger, eventually that fingers coming right back to them.

It's they think, oh, I'm doing something by shutting this person down and shutting that person down. Without thinking that at some point, you're gonna be shut down. And they're picking away at our first amendment, right? It's coming back to us. If we don't fucking stand up for the shit right now,

together as comics were fucked. I believe in clean family comedy. So you quit, thank you. So you quit, thank you. I want, I want, I want you, I wish you shut me in order up to day clothing Fucking champion. You're not a champion keep going. You'll get something out of it. I'm trying That they record someone set and put the whole thing out there when Bobby put extra hot finish Joe when Bobby put that shirt on it was only one guy on the shirt

finish Joe when Bobby put that shirt on it was only one guy on the shirt I think I'll talk about it. I know people know it was run DMC on the shirt Yeah, I don't want you to give it the phone was saying something intense go back I'm sorry. I think you got a stick on the what is it called camouflage? I think you got more juice for that I thought the camouflage was pretty good. I think there's things with the camouflage that you could do. I like it. What were you saying that? You should not be shaming his clothing. I'm offended by you shaming him.

Yeah, I'm okay. He has freedom of fashion. Yo, why can't you just feel uncomfortable? That's what I don't get. Because people don't want to feel bad. Yeah, but why not? That's part of life because you feel bad. Can I say something about it?

What is it? That's the problem. It's like stop telling kids. Like, but like, why not? That's part of life, is you feel bad. Can I say something I don't have to? That's the problem. It's like stop telling kids. Like, we were talking about this on this thing that we shot the other day, but like, here's the issue for me. When I was a kid and I fucked up in class, and I told my parents the teacher hated me, my parents said, figure it out.

Yeah. Figure it the fuck out. Now, when these kids fuck up in class they go to teacher hates me the parents go Well, let's either get the teacher fired or change your class and when you put in their head is that when the world Creates issues for you. We bend the world to your comfort zone. That's why they're so entitled As a parent I disagree with that some people, but not, parents, I know, don't fucking do that. That's, I mean, surprise, Bobbi.

Bobbi, you be surprised, Bobbi. I listen, my kids in school, my kids had problems in school. And I understand that I actually know firsthand, I'm not guessing, I'm not making assumptions. I know my kid has had problems in school, and we have to deal with it. Look, how do you deal with it? Well, we have to talk to him about school and we have to deal with it. Look how do you do with it? Well, we have to talk to him about it. We have to take things away. He has to have consequences

He has to feel bad about it. If you see what you just said if he's wrong Everything you said is about building your kids character and making everything you said the first five things You just said just made your kid a decent person. Yes, but that's my point. These other parents go, I tell you, I have friends and their teachers and their parents try to get them fired for scolding their dickhead kids. I think you're right about that.

Those people are shit people, but I think that there's a lot of good parents out there that, look at values. I mean, is what, and I say it all the time, you wanna change the fucking world, start with your fucking shit kid. Man in a mirror. Just, don't fuck me.

My cake is done. You're not, you know, hard. You're gonna get to create the next generation, man. It's like, okay, my kid isn't going to try to fucking just take his dick out with chicks. That was my move. I was excited to teach you to him someday. Long time to talk about that. How many of you? And, I thought it was my move. I was excited to teach you to him some long time to talk about that

The ring Something about you Boston guys. I'm gonna have to teach my kid how to Sex is gonna be different from my kid. He's not I was exposed to sex in the first grade Right, I was a porn omags and Pornomags. And all this fucked up shit, my kid, we don't swear, we don't talk, we teach him about his penis and his testicles and nobody can, all this shit that we have to do. Like I say, I'm act, it's easy to be a parent, it's hard to be a good one now.

Because there's so much shit you have to do, I can't teach him the shit that I was taught because I'll fuck him up. I had to learn a whole new curve and it's harder. I don't hit my kid. I don't want to. I don't want to hit him.

I don't want to. I like to shake him. You can't shake him. You can't. You can't. You can't. When I fucked up as a kid, my father would get all the neighbors over

and they would fist me. That's what builds character and a crack addiction. That shirt is actually an award he got from the neighborhood. You took all the fists. What are we going to do? He's the champion. Took the whole call to sack. You took all the fists, what are we gonna do? He's the champion. You took the whole coldest sack. You popped your Jerry.

All right, let's, we're gonna end this fucking thing. All right, let's start with Vaughn first. What do we got for Vaughn? Well, Caroline's on Tuesday, January 15th, use Coach Vaughn as the promo code for discounted tickets and come support. Yeah, at coachvaughn..com follow me on Instagram and Twitter and all that fun stuff to keep up with everything I'm doing.

That's the main thing. What are you gonna do a set on the Patrisso Neo benefit? What's that going down? Whenever Bill Burr invites me to. Does he know, but does he know you guy you do comedy? Does he know that? He should. Yeah.

I think so. Yeah. I don't know. We'll see how that works. Someday, right? I think that should happen at some point. We'll see how that works. I don't even know what I'm gonna fucking do this year. You're gonna, I have no idea.

You're hosting again, right? Yeah, ever, yeah. I mean, obviously I got new material, but. No, you don't. I'm gonna try to get you on. See, you fucked that up. I don't know, I don't know. There we go.

All right, can we go Patrice on the benefits being of Patrice? February, 1997, PM, that's a Tuesday night main stage act. Scroll down, please for God's sake. New York City Center. All right, here we go. Ready, Big Joe, because in Bill Burr, Chris Red, Siphah Sound, Gary Gorman, Jim, uh, Jim Gaffigan, Joe list, Mark Norman, Michelle Wolf and Rich Vos is hosting as always. Uh, it's probably sold that right.

If it's not, go there and buy tickets. It's a great show. And of course, a great cause. What the best. No, but you should roll. Oh, he'd be like, what is Joe fucking Mark Norman list? He would fucking fucking I know it's just the same guy Get me on man Get me on I'd be so honored. I asked somebody to ask Bill because I don't know Bill First, but I don't I feel uncomfortable asking people for shit. I got to get better at that But yeah, I would be so honored to do that and Vaughn should do it too. All right so check it out Mike. Mike should never do this. This weekend I'll be you want to do you next I was going to save

you for last but if you want to go next. Go ahead. Oh it doesn't matter. No you made a decision go. This weekend I'll be at the stress factory Thursday 5 Saturday we're shooting a movie there. this week and I'll be at the stress factory Thursday, Friday, Saturday, we're shooting a movie there. What's it called? Loan 2. No, this is gonna be a real movie with... All right, relax. I mind this short film.

It's a great film. It's a great film. Madfac next time I'm in my hotel, I'm gonna do some research. Dude, if you make a... Can I say something? What? You should make a film on your phone.

Yeah. And we could just keep making films. And then we'll have a, but I don't know, I love it. We'll have a short film hotel comedy festival at the end of the year. There's had to be in a hotel can it be just be on the road? No, it has to be in the hotel. Can it be like road?

No, it can be, he's in a hotel. No, the hotel, all right, go ahead. Let's do the road. You're on the right. All right. You're gonna change everything to fucking benefit you. Why can't you just stick in the brain? Because I don't stay in my room like you.

It's the boring room challenge. I'll never say no argument during plugs. This is great. We've never seen men in the radio before. So what we fucking do is our- Oh yeah, listen. I'm listening. I have headphones on.

You don't. You're not listening. Good point. That's what I That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right.

That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right.

That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. Then Miami the Miami in then a Where am I after that? Oh, right there?

Rio and Vegas coming up and we're doing the Rio and Vegas and two in in May in May 20th yeah to the 26 comedy works Saratoga Springs I mean me Keith Boss and I think very good try to get version Just go to my calendar. I'm booked up to get Verzy. That's a good hand. That's a good hand. Just go to my calendar and I'm booked up. Go to richfoss.com. All right.

We got to, people are just tuning out right now. Just get to it. What else? No, that's good enough. Thank you. And... Shultzie, what do you got? Besides everything. Do you really need to do a plug no?

But you know we we started something pretty cool my YouTube page another thing No, this is so so we turn it into a comedy network and So we got a few different shows that we're doing weekly. I just push them out. Good, I'm glad I elicited that, react. Come on, baby. But, yeah, the two dot com slash the Andrew Schultz and every Sunday we do a new stand up clip. Every Monday we have this show called Inside Jokes, which I think is cool.

I'd love to have you all on, but I basically get comics to take. I'm in, I'm in. I'll tell you about it if you like. And basically have every comics bring like a very very like a joke that just doesn't work. It's too offensive. Divided a crowd, etc. We all four of us bring it and we all kind of like work on it and like, etc.

And so that's up now. That's every Monday. Wednesdays is Flagorant to the podcast. Thursdays is a show called dropping in. It's like my travel show. So I do it on what? It's on YouTube.com. It's on YouTube.

It's on YouTube. Now, shows everything I do is on YouTube. But why patreon? What is patreon? Yeah. Patreon is for my flavor and two podcasts. That's the the sports. I call it sports podcasts. It's not I just use sport. It sports as a shield because people who like sports are never offended by a thing. So you got to keep out all the social justice for us. Oh, that's a good idea. I got a couple. Yeah. So, uh, oh, yeah. So that's Thursday. We do a drop in in. So, oh yeah, so that's Thursday we do dropin' in.

So that's like my little comedy version of Anthony Bourdain, I guess you could say. Do you get paid on YouTube too? There's YouTube revenue. I mean, I haven't figured out like the best way to monetize you. I just know that like, like I started putting my clips up for standup on YouTube

just because nobody would do the special. I've been putting my standup, my special on Instagram. Yeah, you've been probably killing it, right? special of my special. I put my stand up my special on Instagram. Yeah, you've been probably killing it right? It's killing it. I know. I did that last year. Yeah, I'm starting to do that. And I got close.

All the comics are starting to do. Can't enough to you. I'm the tellin' comics are doing for two years. They tell me to fuck it, too. Of course I did. Last time I was here, I did. Oh, this is my, you guys want to see a trailer for my new special?

Yeah, let's do it. All right. Let's do it, Play it. Go to the beginning though. Yeah. Go to the beginning. Ready? Here we go. The world is no longer as you remember it. Donald Trump wins the presidency. Everything changed. They have banned the song, Baby. It's cold outside after the rise of the Me Too movement. Stop using the term, Tranny.

They still won. Trance, Jen, Thur, Tranny. Grandmother, Granny. That's a great joke. Welcome to the English language, Tranny. Oh. Where you shoot that? Stop.

Keep watching. We'll talk after. No, Liz, you're not stopping. You're messing up the rhythm. I don't care. Your confidence is fucking annoying me. Oh, my God. Just watch somebody have to say it.

Just watch. Everybody watch me. Don't play with your goad tea, though. OK. Don't pontificate while we're watching. Watch it, go. Who just became a millionaire? Oh, as you know it, I don't even have sex on top of me.

That's predatory behavior. Sex on top. Is a boat to change. I lay on my back. I put my hands underneath my butt cheeks like a strong feminist ally. Yo, Andrew, you good? Every time I travel, we're doing a little documentary. Oh, you feel me?

He's filming me, is that okay? No, sorry. What if he films me? Trust me, we don't want you in it. There is still hope in the darkness. Every year, Shark fights a little kid's leg off. And we're like, why are the sharks coming so close to a shark? Maybe it's over-fishing.

Maybe it's Rebecca on a heavy day. Maybe that's what it is. APPLAUSE What's gayer? Is this not going to ladies' dick or eatin' a dude's pussy? He's a dude's pussy. He's either a dude's pussy. It's no brainer. If I had to do as pussy as gayer than

starting a train of dick, I know for a, I mean, I know, that's my opinion. I fucking love that. Thanks, man. Fucking amazing. Thanks, man. It was really great. Thank you.

The first joke is really great. The other couple. Yeah. Listen. And that. We were off. And I don't think so. You're like, watch me. No, I was proud of it, man.

It's so cool to be on it. And it's, uh, you're the hope. Hey, I was proud of the loan, too. Listen, this shit. I have fucking standing over the end. Oh, yeah. You're fucking dumb soccer, one piece. You're gonna stand and go, you don't.

You're not gonna get one guy going, come on, people. Right, you can play. I didn't know what he is. You know what I was talking about? You know what I was talking about? You know what I was talking about? You're not gonna get one guy going, come on, people. Right, you can play. You know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm talking about? You know what I'm not gonna walk a one-piece show. Maybe you get a standing-o you don't. You look at one guy going, come on, people. Right, that you can play.

I didn't know audience. You know what I wasn't on stage for it? I'm gonna... Lost in this period joke with the sharks around six years ago. Yeah! No shakes when I first got married. No, good job. I like it a lot. No, it, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, And it's gonna be a special and I'll tell you guys how I'm They're saying company shooting it and editing. Yeah, yeah, well no, I filmed it with a couple friends of mine

Yeah, I went on I went on tour in Europe The show's are sold out guys. They're sold out You could just talk to me. I listen So only cuz we're both basketball people. That's the thing is like you use basketball analogy. I got you right now We're talking to the people listening so So basically what it is is I we did it in a Four different countries, you know, it's gonna be six different pieces

I'm gonna release one piece a week for the month of March or to stand up and then I'm released one piece a week for the month of March for the tour documentary It looks beautiful. Thank you. I mean visually different cool. Thanks. And edited pretty cool. I like the cuts. You look great in the jokes. I mean, we're working on the next special too. You can even punch out. No, dude, fucking layers. Good for you. Thanks, man. And the idea is pushing back against this outrage, right? Yes. Like the premise for the special from me really was like, this not outrage off of real shit,

not outrage off of like Black people getting killed by the police, outrage off of bullshit, fake outrage, the shit that is trivial is nonsense. And it's like, when is it gonna be- Comics were supposed to knock this out. When is it gonna be available? So I broke it up into six different pieces. The first two are available, March 3rd.

I think it's the first weekend, the first Sunday of March, and they'll come out, the rest of the pieces will come out every other Sunday. Is it on Patreon? No, no, it's on YouTube. So you give it away. Give it away. But why don't you try to sell it to Netflix or somewhere?

Are you putting it on YouTube? I put it on my YouTube. So I thought about selling it my last one, right? Well, I tried to sell my last one, nobody bought it, and I was super fucking sad. You didn't, you didn't come to me. No, I didn't. And I, and I, and I, I just, I just want to create something and put it out. So I put out this thing called like four for one. And then I just

put out a clip a week. I did that for like 33 weeks. And I just, uh, all the clips started to go viral. I think I just had my like 12th clip hit a million views and like, I started sell out shows on the road. And that's when I was putting a lot of Instagram clips on, on, of my standup and stuff like that. And like, um, I basically realized that like doing a special for a network doesn't really do what we wanted it to do. The idea before was let's do the special not as much for the payday, but it's like, because I want to go to Indiana and sell out. I want to go to LA and sell out.

I want to sell out. So that's where you make your money. That's what I started doing. And and and like it was like, Oh, shit, that's the thing. So I would consider obviously a Netflix offer, but nobody else can get you to watch their specials. So it's not really. We're doing it there. Doesn't just come shouldn't only play your special one or just twice. They don't know what they're doing. I mean, they're going at business, but that's just because they just don't understand like they book. They book specials based on what they can do for you outside of the special.

So they book some of for a special based on if they'll be like a good reporter for the daily show. And that's what they told me to my face. And I was like, well, maybe that's why your specials aren't doing well. And it's not to knock people who work on the show, but like if your purpose for getting your house painted was to hire the best painter You would hire the best painter not the best guy who could do plumbing. They don't care They have the fastest horse doesn't win the race in this business

So all you got to do is think of something different and get like you said I'd rather sell out a theater somewhere with fans and make that money than to I think that's a fuck comics because I had a special Because I had a special. I've had a special. You know what, man? I remember when you had it. Yeah, it didn't, you know what I mean? It would have been better for me to give that away for nothing on YouTube.

At that time, piece me old it out, it would have been viral. But that's like, I wanna, that's what I'm trying to do. And I don't wanna extend that to like other comics. Like I think I set a precedent for comedians, which was the way that you get people in seats is by giving away your material, not hoarding it. Right. And then so now that I think comics are wrapping their heads around it because they've seen the success I've had with it, what I want to do is basically say, hey, here's this

network that we have YouTube.com sites, the Andrew Schultz, right? And this is just unsafe comedy. That's all I care about is non-PC unsafe comedy. So if you do stuff that's a little bit more safe, it could be hilarious. It just doesn't fit the brand here. Here's the problem. Yeah. I think with this. And I get scared because this is starting to happen too. Is once somebody complains or wants somebody says with YouTube, Patreon, they'll just say goodbye and everything's gone. I'll figure it out. Just keep that out.

But you know what I'm saying? I said, because they've done that to a lot of fucking people. I figured out, man, I think that, I think that every single way, I would say it was a way that we could figure it out together where we could have our own YouTube. That's how it's. But how about this too?

Like YouTube is a monster-ish. But what about your own website? They can't shut down. That's the other thing. I'll probably back Some time I'll scream it. I know I know But I'll back it up probably on my website We come up with our own Our own YouTube channel I'm on your I'm on your page. I'm on your page with it. So like so similar like my bonds like what what bar school is essentially bar school has all the website in 1992 so I'm so yeah I'm with you on it.

I'm with you on it. Kays where your power keep your website. But the thing that I'm trying to do is just to get to this point because this is nothing to do with me is just about giving back. Are you so in your documentary right now? No. So, listen. So, what I would do is 48, I got a piss.

Yo, let's go. I can't make- That's the longest plug I've ever experienced. No, please. I got a butt-boring room. I got a bunch of people that get a pluck some shit. I can't help you guys out. This part is just for you guys.

You guys are going shut the fuck up. I'm sorry. I'm trying to say we can't be funny. No, it's only you, John. I'll let's say it. We'll figure it out. No, please come. No, no a clip, I want to do that. It is great.

And I think it fits the brand perfectly. You're going to feel it up. I would love to extend that to comics. I have a comic. I got you. Oh, you're saying you want an idea I want to run by you. You're saying you play on your site. I hired a guy.

I got a buddy of mine. He quit his job and he had a government job. And I basically was like, dude, just be my guy. guy Let's shoot all these shows man. We're shooting. We're literally shooting five different shows a week man We're putting out more content a week than I'll show you some content you can't even say today. She wants content. Hey, can you do me a favor? Can you put loan up on the site? Sure, I'll put it up. What if loan becomes like a call? No, you know what I'll do?

I'd rock you more as a weekly video where we bash Lone. Like I'd bring a bunch of comics. And you have to sit there and just sweat as we shit all over. We're gonna throw a straw cop. Throw a straw stun you. Sorry. All right, listen to that. No, here's the thing.

All right, we're done. We're done. There's no other thing. I gotta go. We gotta go. Gabby. Hey, Gabby. I'm back. She's back. No, I thing I got to go. Where do you got to go? Gabby? Welcome back. Hey Gabby. I'm back. I'm back. I know. I'm what do you got? I'm back in New York. My monthly show comes back first Wednesday of the month at the way station in Brooklyn and yeah,

follow me on Instagram. At Gabby's Brian. What do you got back? I was saying I'm telling you a bunch. That show, right? Michael. Yeah but shut up. Michael, she has benefit for New York public housing. Is this Friday at Irving Plaza come through? I'm gonna make that a graph. Support that, really. It's so important. What do you got, Mike? New Mike?

I'm at Mike Abrucci on all social media and I got a podcast called A Little Time that you can listen to everywhere. He's checking out Little Mike. What do you got, old Mike? Well, thanks for coming. I'm sure he came out too. How much he Mike? Thanks everyone came out too. Hayden, thank you. And he came out. How much he might.

Thanks everyone came out to Hayden as Plato. My first time headlining there. People even came out during the, we were worried, because there was a Cowboys playoff game. Yeah. And people still came out. So it was awesome. It's great.

Also, everyone who gave to Jasper's Fund, lost. Thank you so much, Bobby. Yeah, every week Joe did. I did, Boston. Even Lewis stepped up. Yeah, Lewis did. You were sound, sound did. Yeah, sound OK. uh... and every joder i did was did even lose stepped up yeah uh... sal sal did said yes i'll get it

you know miss antonio i did that room over the week holiday's all day when you work here today curtain off to second row now they don't do any of that they don't care well now they care it is such a big but i don't know but i think that we gave uh... jasper is uh... you just shut you down

We'll talk after the show where so let me get this out He has to piss I don't want to cut you off again because last time I cut you off you cried No In surgery is next week, so thank you guys this I have this dog better live because we raised a lot of money. I don't want to hear about it. Something else happens. If something else happens, I would take that money and go to the casino and try to double it.

Because he's going to get the cancer again. They usually come back. Zach, what do you got? Zach, the new guy. You guys are the best fans of the world. Happy New Year, Merry Christmas, happy holidays. Love you so much. Thanks for supporting all of us at our shows and we'll see you next week You know what the You've been listening to YKWD podcast

Thanks for listening Now go back to your shitty jobs shitty jobs Check out riotcast.com for all of the best podcasts on the internet. And they're all free, and they're all free. Shining, shining, shining, shining. You