Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Michael J Pox

Episode Date: September 17, 2015

We have a very special Bonus episode with the hilarious Marina Franklin, Dov Davidoff and Jeff Leach. Enjoy this extra Thursday episode Dudes!!!!!!!   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ya son casi las dos, nos vamos a ir a casa o hemos venido a jugar. A casa, a casa, nadie va a irse a casa. Hay que ponerse modo de racón. ¿Eres un dragón? Soy el dragón de Fireball. Ya te digo yo que las mejores historias siempre piezan con un chupito de Fireball. Bien, frío. Yo, pues al lío.

Un Fireball, sabes que la fiesta será épica. Ignite the night, con Fireball. Disfruta de sabes que la fiesta será épica. Ignite the night con fireball. Disfruta de un consumo responsable. 33 grados. ¿Y qué es lo que es? En la network riotcast.com. ¡Vamos, vamos, vamos, vamos! ¡A la mejor cara de la unidad! ¡Dónde lo intento ir a un reconozco! ¡Dónde me gustan, chicos! I'm not gonna come into the funniest podcast on the planet Earth.

I always try to keep it like a comic head. I have a bunch of guys on. It's just us sitting down. And sometimes it's hilarious, sometimes it's intense. No topics of direction. I love doing it. This podcast has no rules. Can I get a microphone?

I'm sure I've already said so there's more graphics. Rubber Kelly. You know what, dude? You know what, dude? You know what dude? I know what dude! I guess... I'm playing just a c'mon. I'm trying to...

...murly... ...it. There we go. What's up guys, how are we doing? You love that? One, two. Check it out. We're here with another YKWD, a 9 o'clock edition for YKWD. You know what, dude? Oh, that's good.

And then we got a special show tonight. We don't usually do a late show But we are tonight and I got a I got a great Throw in here because I have with yeah, we're being filmed those little cameras That's you on there. You're fucking up my intro, though. Oh, no, no, I thought that I'm shutting your mic off There you go. You just a r rambling fucking heroin addict from Jersey. Shut the fuck up. I get say nothing. I got fucking, we got a very special show tonight,

an amazing show. I'm gonna point my, I don't like you not talking. It's actually more uncomfortable. It is. For both of us. We got actually a good friend of mine, man. Dove David off, who I've known for a guy the whole time. All right, fucking.

Been a long time, man. Dove David,, who I've known for a guy the long time, right? But a long time, man. Dove David off one of the funniest guys around on an amazing actor. I'm trying. And, uh, funny guy. Are you, are you sanding some bolsa wood? What's going on in here? Yeah, ha, ha, ha. It's what it sounds like.

Someone's doing like some sort of shop. We, ha, ha, ha. That is Dan Natham in everybody. You just heard, uh, he's actually, ha, he's actually, he's actually, what can I say? That's a good thing. That's a good thing. Shut him up, I'll show you what in the corner. We all the same now.

We, well, we'll get back to Dumb a little bit. Dumb is one of my friends who, I mean, how long do we go back 15 years? Yeah, probably at this point. It sounds like an awful time. Like that. Yeah, no, 15. do we go back 15 years? Yeah, probably at this point. Something awful to me. Something like that. Yeah, no, 15. Is it 15?

Yeah, I've seen it. I've seen you really evolved. I'm actually impressed with your evolution psychologically. I'm going to shut you. You're making up again. I don't know what the fuck's happened. This is dumb, though. This is why I love you, because you're a fucking complete alien. You're a complete alien. You literally are from a ship these cameras. I'm a who people watch it

Yeah, they listen and watch and they can't show him can you speak? No, that's okay. There you are right there. I want you to stay focused. Oh, that looks really clear There's a different shot. There's me right there. Oh, that's really interesting. You guys are all teched out here. I should have put some blushing That's Marina Franklin right there I'm at least I've got cleavage who are me too. I got cleavage too Maria. I've known yeah, I've known you for a while too Yes, you have a long time and Fuck is going on you hang out with We have Jeff Lee. He just sent up to like I've hung out with all these people for many many years and? You hanging out with him. It's going to be weird after. We have Jeff Lee.

He's just setting up to like, I've hung out with all these people for many many years and built a close friendship with him, and then Jeff's here as well. I have Jeff Lee. I've known him for two months and I'm gonna like him. No, I do like you. I swear to God, I have this fucking crazy,

this crazy fetish with English comics. I love him. I don't give a fuck how corny they are. I don't care what people say about them. I know I'm saying you're very funny of course. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm glad you let me know. I love English. I just love the wit. That's the thing about it. I love it. I do realize it was the Americans and the Anglophiles like that. It's the same in England. In England, we love Americans. if an American comic or a Canadian comic comes to the UK we feel like your voice is itself to humour and we're we're we're we're at a door in American comics not really I mean

close yeah I can't not Canadians I was just trying to include them because you know name one Canadian guy one Canadian comic my camera I like Craig Campbell he's cool Craig Campbell Mike Wilmot who yeah Tony Lawson yeah Tony Lawson I like of course I love it I have a bunch of Campbell he's cool Craig Campbell Mike Wilmot who? Another one I like of course I love it. I have a bunch of Canadian comic friends. Yeah, let's get down to business. Let's get down to business What is I got deep work at first? I got D. Poo who is the the fucking I mean head head Hancho D. Poo on the ones and two He's my fucking rain man. He's my Savon. Yeah, he's the young fucking hacker He hacks the world he makes all this shit happen. He's the motherfucker stand up Really is impressive. We got day are you gonna comment after no no not at all And then we got Chris scope on scope. Oh, oh, oh, my god

Oh my god, you're killing Robert. Hey, he has an affinity. I said Robert, like ready. Oh, Bob is ready. I should only do, I should only do W off solo. That's the only time when he's like, hey, what's up? You want to talk? D Poo just left his station. Where is it?

I'm worried about Chris Coupo, because he's, I've been in this station for now five to six minutes. And he's already made seven or eight different caffeinated drinks. He didn't make a lot of caffeinated drinks. I'm worried about your liver and your part time waiter. So what would you make one? It would be too hot on diabetes. Now, how do you have to be careful? What's that?

They're not from neither. Well, I mean, but you're around that. It's like being a drug addict. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, of course, I want to talk real quick about these two Scopo and Deepo deep Scandinavian point. So he wants you to shut the scope on deep Who And deep what they

You guys really suck at radio You like I know you think it's funny here, but people listen I'm gonna get 900 with these guys You got the fuck up. You're absolutely right. Listen, listen. You're absolutely right. Deepu and fucking Scopo. Oh, fucking two assholes I brought up here.

I should've just done it. I'm interviewing Jeff. No, it's great, when Bobby gets angry, he's riveting. I don't get a point there. Yeah, yeah. Like you were, you were the show riveting. You're very, you're riveting when you're angry. You really come alive, Scopo, like you were doing this for the show riveting you're very you're riveting with your anger You really come alive scope. Oh, let's have it. Ha ha

They did a roast bottle battle last week roast bottle. That's right roast battle. Are you still on there? You still roast them? Don't even do it then what's a roast battle a roast battle is deep. We won't you explain that it's like this new show format That's come about in the cat last couple of months. a one-on-a-l-a for a while how was it it's three years I didn't judge one yeah it was really cool how would they set comedy store and let's watch a frosty one of those when I've been there yeah yeah yeah frosted some of the rose yeah really I know it's crazy it's always like he should do that as the only thing he does. And they did it in Montreal this year. Did they?

So these two last week did it. Me, Irish, Fier and Mark Norman were judges on it. Are you guys comedians? Yes. Okay. Aspiring, let's say. No, no, no. Yeah, fucking comments.

Don't let him, he did it. No, no, he's just asking because no it did he did it depots so good at at lot did the ability to all the uh... you literally the second worst guess that i've ever had to show i mean literally i was in another i was a was a blanket i could put over you well you guys did it last week and it was uh... interesting and well i look man

sk here is the deal you didn't go fucking deep enough and you didn't get help you should have one how you you know i think i mean i got i texted my jokes to people like all we did think of this what you think of this so i i i get i got some help you know you got the wrong help apparently no you know you got some help he when you do a roast it's the only time really in comedy

it's perfectly legal to go have people help you with roast jokes right he went and got help wrote some himself had people punch him up and got other ones you went by yourself and just did it by yourself yeah I really tried to just have like my own pure thing your appearance your appearance you went to the honest back okay yes and I'm guessing that you're also a loser? I mean, did you lose the race back? Oh, absolutely.

Because you are a player. So you're an unprepared purist, so you have your morality and your ethics are based in DC. Yeah, that's right. Because, originally, you have, you know, failure now, marking you. All the good that pride did me, huh? Yeah. But yeah, you know, we went at it. Every joke I tried fucking fell so

flat cuz I feel like I didn't go after him enough I don't know anything about Scopo all right all like all my jokes are no one really does he's a mysterious figure really really but like I all my jokes are based on like oh he's on funny this he's on funny that I didn't really dig in there yeah there's fucking body his face and we had a ton of ass jokes here. It's fucking stutters. Yeah, I had a stuttering thing. Yeah, it's fucking stutters. You would stutter? Yeah, I stutter.

That's why. But, speak on the show. How would I know that? That is why I just got hair like a falling wave. You didn't get that? Thank you. He looks like he looks like a It really does have a whole new style.

He looks like a whole new style haircut. He looks like the goofy best friend character from every 80s movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I know. Yeah. Can you explain why I was reading my jokes? Yeah 80s movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Explain why I was reading my jokes. Yeah, you could. Can you explain why your stuff said doesn't even exist?

No, it does if I read it. It does if I read it. If we get you really upset, yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's gotta work on that. Yeah, yeah. Michael J. Parks, everyone. I think it's what we're gonna do.

You should, because you'll forget it, and then I'll get mad at you. Yeah, so then you're in there. Come. They write down now. Don't kill the medium of radio right now that you don't even belong to you now i have a lot of it up to get right down for the title of the show okay right

we do things around us what happened with your with your rights uh... great jokes i'll give them that so yeah i was reading it all day that they were bitching at me for reading it off of the if i don't read it off slowly up i'll go over some words and i'll i will I will stutter, I'll miss some words, which happens to me with Janice Joe list. It's not like this is?

I guess Joe list that happens to me. So I was like, I'll be reading this time. It doesn't sound like a stud, it just sounds like your bit drunk. I go over words quickly. I don't pronunciate them. Right. That's the problem.

Here's the thing. That's because pronunciate isn't a fucking word. I don't say it. She's not. I don't pronunciate isn't a fucking word I don't pronunciate them It's not over your way Oh pronounce I mean like you know, I get to laugh at both times. I know I was like I was good no one got it Because I said oh god no, that's why I love English comics. They know grandma and spelling some of it I star although I mean like do you feel like the American the American language is the is the proper language because in this country

That's what it is. Aluminum it would be false over its aluminum right yeah, I don't give a fuck about that Like we said yeah very angry? Yeah, yeah, absolutely. They go, we invented the language. I think, well, we did invent a language, but then also there's lots of other countries that invented different variations, that language, and that is true to that country, or that continent. So I think the aluminum, if you want aluminum,

you should be able to say it in a aluminum. I disagree. I think it's nice. I think you guys sound like you speak it the way it should be spoken. Really? I went to a Renaissance Fair this Sunday Sunday and everyone there was told my management they had to do what I was. You immediately get a wrench and a fucking turkey like that.

It was a knock him off a horse. I mean, it's surprising how real that experience was. But it was genuinely everyone at all the stores were told by their employees you have to do this ye oldy English thing which for me was just a day of people ostensibly taking the piss out of my accent really badly. So I'd walk in everywhere and they go, hozah for the chibah, hello, zah, how are you today? Well, isn't that not yours? Isn't that when we came here and we kind of triant,

I mean, the Southern accent is basically from an English accent and I think But now there's a mix of a Basterdization of their of that accent. Well, it's actually mix of French and English German and everything wasn't it was Southern twang right if you if you now there boy you're on the stand as in like Leonardo Capricore and Django That's what we're going for well, but here's the thing is that you, if you, that somehow it has a little English twang in it. Yeah, yeah, if you, if you slow it down the way,

so I mean, if you play it backwards, it actually sounds, sound African. It's like an old record. Welcome to the show. Thanks for coming here. It's called the Bomb Band Am. And this is, this is the first time

somebody else has come here. Oh, I'm sorry. Oh. Anyways, yeah, band-aid Anyways, yeah, I think I like those Renaissance fairs. I can't I can't fucking go to them Why why not? What's so fun you fit straight in what is the fucking the the just put a beard on fucking Henry 8 you live in the dream I could play a lot of characters You could play every you could play the guy from game of Thrones You are you are the guy? It's been time before it's everyone tells on that It's true right you're there you're there the spy what's his name? What's his name? Lord Varys Lord Varys? Oh my god Well that Halloween must be so easy for you Lord Varys a thumb you can do it. Oh, who left the thing?

I had like a female cackel just now Lord Varys, a thumb. You can do it. Who laughed? The thing. I had like a female cackle just now. Was that the female cackle? I literally thought Maria was in the room. Did you hear that? I wish we could play it back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's very feminine.

Yeah, I could. Well, ladies men back in the day. But back then though, they actually didn't have bald guys. No, no, no. No, you didn't shave your head back then. Right, right. You were wigs, powdered wigs. You were a wig or you just went bald

and you left whatever hair you had was on your head. Nobody shaved their head back at them. Do we know where the wig comes from and why they wear a powdered wig? Do we understand? Yeah, because they had knits so they do shave their hair in the course. They do shave their hair off because it was full of knits.

It was all down to hygiene. You know the pinky finger when people are drinking a drink, they go, oh look at me, who am I pinky finger stuck out? The reason for that is because syphilis would give you really bad arthritis. So all the courtesans would have these messed up fingers and all right out and stuck out. Why was that weird?

What was that weird again? Oh, oh God, wow look, dumb syphilis is so prevalent. Wow, that's the weirdest little finger I've ever seen in my entire life. That's the terror. I can't bend the hook. I bet you bang it in a... No, really? I'd use that for that, that's a beautiful piece.

It shows that it can't be real. It's not very dexterous. I can't use it well. Did you break it? Yeah, I did break it. Yeah, that's why I can use it. Why can't you get that fixed? The bone is dead inside, so I can get it soldered, essentially into a hook, but I can't use it. Why can't you get that fixed? Oh the bone is dead inside so I can get it

soldered and sent it into a hook but I can't get it to work again. How did that happen? Old injury and then some boxing stuff. And you just keep jamming it up. Everything does life is boxing stuff. No no you just keep jamming it up and then it dies inside. You know speaking of boxing.

Did you got a bit of pink eye? What's that about? I was a boxing injury. I was at a gym in the garden. Speaking of boxing. I didn't know what the black guy was. No it's alright about? I was a boxing injury. I was at a gym in the garage. Speaking of boxing, I'm not gonna put this back on. I, no, it's alright, you just keep it on your thing. Just actually make it tight on your head, like a hangageef.

Pirate. Like a pirate, bandit. You and, you and, you and, you were in fucking an incident of like a month ago here at the seller. Oh God, I know. And you've got a car to go on now, what's the talk about?

Well, here's the thing. He's quite boring. But it's interesting to me because a lot of comics don't get to that point where you, where you fuck you, but you also had something happen this weekend. Like you have this fucking, you have a lot of fun.

Is it thing that follows me around? You have a thing that follows you around, Jeff, that we're gonna get to it. I gotta go a bit crazy this weekend. Hey, tough. Yeah, I'm gonna get to it. Oh, okay Yeah, you just allow me to fucking host the show. I owe me Jesus fucking Christ Judgment of fucking you're like we're not at a fucking on a bus right now. Oh my god. You fucking heroin Hey, it's just a Pinky looks like shit

Listen the fuck you asshole. Glad you pinky looks like shit. Yeah, it does, doesn't it? Listen, you have this thing around you. You had the fight a couple weeks ago that I'd like to get into. Dove was involved in it in some way, which I don't know how. And also, um... He was holding the cards in between the rounds. No, but there was, I think, do you jump in? We're in British shorts.

Yeah, I have to do it a lot. So then, but last this weekend, you had something going along with you. A crazy go. Something happened with you, a crazy girl. So, I mean, let's, I want to start it a lot. So then, but last this weekend you had something going along with you. A crazy girl. Something happened with you, a crazy girl. So, I mean, I want to start at the fight. You basically, some guy said you said something at the guy, you snapped on it because of what? No, I mean, you're making this very, very one-sided.

What happened is I was doing a completely good set of the seller. And this chap and his wife have been talking through a cut the comic sets. Yeah. As is my right as comedian on stage, I said, guys, what are you talking about? You keep talking. It's disrupting the show. Nicely, I always start nice because I think you should always give an audience member a chance to go, oh, sorry,

I didn't realize I was so loud. And then you go, no worries, just shut the fuck up. You do it nice, you know that, and everyone laughs, it's so nice. I said, what guys were you talking about? And they turn around, the wife turn around and then when, why don't you just do your thing? All right, let us do our thing. So they weren't English.

Yeah, they weren't English. No, they weren't English. She was a gay, she was a gay American. No that's what my comedy's based in, honestly. And then he got angry, so I said, don't worry dude, I'm not like having an exclusive go at your girlfriend, I'm not a misogynist, I'm an equalitist, I think you're an ignorant cunt too. That's pretty funny.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then the actor got angry, yeah. And the audience were cheering, they were on my side, you've got to have the audience on your side otherwise it's pointless. Well it's easy for you because you have no sleeves to get the audience out. Is that how I win the audience out? If anything, that makes them the audience on your side otherwise it's pointless. Well it's easy for you because you have no sleeves to get the audience out. Is that how I win the audience out?

If anything, that makes them want to hate me more. It's hard. I feel like aesthetically an audience wants to hate me more. Well they see me, they think the guy from Game of Thrones who rats everybody out there just hate me. Do they? Or do they go Bobby Kelly who's got like a career that we all know and we like?

I feel that's probably more they think. So they like you when you walk a stage. Me, they want to hate. I have a face that wants to be punched. I mean, you're a brother. Absolutely. If you're an angry, if you're an angry, small man in America and you have like a bit of an Napoleon complex, who are you going to want to punch? You're going to want to punch the Ponzi long-haired British guy in

skinny jeans, chattened up girls at the bar. Of course you are. And I understand that. I understand there's probably. I don't want to hit the Indian kid. I go, well, I know. If you're in Pakistan, sure. And the Megan Blue video stuff for me. That was a fantastic bit of political satire. Everyone ignored, but it's alright. Thank you very much.

No, it's alright, doesn't matter. You can have the rag now. I'm sure you want to hold onto this. No, I feel like I have my respect about that joke. No one ignores it. I was right. It was separate. It's alright.

But yeah, so the guy, so this guy, it? So the guy, we had an argument there. And I said, look, you're not here to dominate the show. You're here to listen to comedy. If you're going to talk to that whole show, you can get out there. And actually, we were talking about our friend who's in the toilet feeling sick and we were worried about him. I said, OK, I will understand. And I also hope that your friend gets AIDS.

You can leave the show now. Really? And they were asked to leave, because they were distroping the whole show. And everyone cheered when they left, and they were like, now can I ask you a couple questions? The guy went, I'll see you outside. I'll see you outside.

I'll tell you. Pause for one second. All right. Did, did, did, were you the first comic to actually tell them to shut the fuck up? No, there would be another comic that evening who arson's been quiet. So this was happening all night?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It wasn't just like, because sometimes these people don't like a year. Some comics don't ask people to be quiet. They just ignore it and carry on the material. Is that what happened? One of the comics just did that. Another comic asked them to be quiet.

Right. So this was going on all night. Yeah, it was the third time they'd been asked why I'm talking. Did the bouncer and the waitress go up to the mishap? Yeah, and literally, has it got a little bit aggressive from the chaps in? Right.

So he would, they were told to leave. So he leaves. Another way out he's going, I'm going to see outside. I'm like, all right, see how I sign. Now did you have to finish your set? Yeah, yeah. So you just went back in the Egypt. I did 10 more minutes. So I did 10 more minutes and they all didn't love it. It was great. And then I went upstairs, I relax, I was set with Devana Drink, and then I was told that I couldn't go outside because the guy

was waiting outside for me. Right. And I think I'm the 31 year old man, and as much as I don't want to bring any disrespect to you on my place of work, I love the seller. I also don't want to be told I have to stay inside and I thought it was ludicrous that a man was so angry So I was like I'll go out I'll have a chat with him. I'll be like dude. There's no big. Yeah, but also you know what with an adult with a mature Ado it does work if you go out and you say listen There's no big I'm a true ado doesn't fucking pace like a panther outside of a club I'm a true ado let's just go home and fuck it. All right. Well, let me be honest. There

was probably a part of me that thought that he wasn't that moronic that he's gonna start trouble with a six foot four guy who you know clearly is gonna have the upper hand in some sort of conflict. I thought I'd go out and go look dude there's no hassle. There's no beef here. You were talking. I'll see you be quiet. You're a bit rude. I was rude back and that's how it works. You know, enjoy know enjoy your night take it easy. Show you how I'm sorry if I fend you girl because I don't want upset anyone That's not what my comedy's about right when I went outside and unless you went hey, dude And he just turned around and punched me in the face he hit your right fucking note. Oh, yeah, you suck a bunch of it Yeah, how was it now? Let me ask question did it did it did it ring your bell? No, no otherwise

I he should have knocked me out and he didn't So it didn't even fail you know it hurt a bit and then I put some ice on it later I took to I've proven I woke up with no lumps So he hits you. Yeah, he doesn't really fucking affect you. No, it hurt me But did you go down? Did you go down? No, absolutely not so you fucking turned around and then what I defended myself to the correct Amount that is legally allowed somebody myself to the correct amount that is legally allowed. I'm talking to somebody and say, hey, yeah, your manager went, stop going on podcast and saying what you did. Yeah, all right.

So, so they've been in myself. Now, how the fuck did you get involved? They locked up outside. The waitress said something to me. So, what's your name? Val said something. So, around outside, he was with a dude. He was with a couple of guys as well.

He was with a guy and the kind of guy. Oh, shit. Yeah, I've been around this fucking energy all my life. I was with the kind of guy, I figured it's waiting outside for a guy like Jeff, I figured they meant, you know, for a couple of hours. I like the wind dovetails of story. He makes it sound like a monologue in a mafia film. Let me tell you something about that.

I've been around this kind of energy. Oh yeah. He was with a guy. I'll tell you something about that. No, I don't. I got out there. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. But yeah, that was my experience. If I was in a chair, if I was in a know what the fuck you're talking about Yeah, that was my if I was in a chair. It's your jersey accident lenses Yeah, I'm a few stories. Yeah, mom sound in very junk. You're in Jersey mine sounding very effeminate like well He was out there and he suck a punch No, I mean I was like hey, there was this guy. What I mean is it wasn't a frack kid You know what I mean like he was a guy that and I saw two guys and I thought that he was getting jumped right and so I pushed the chick out of way when she was coming this way and I started looping off on the guys the other guy on the guy on the guy on the guy on the top of him right he was on top of you how the fuck do you get top of you wait wait wait

they're not up against the when he hit me I sold him in to me right because you know you're a hugger and hit him because he can't do anything you kept trying to bring his arm back and he was hitting nothing right and then I think the girl jumped on his back or something or jumped on us yeah she was gonna jump on your feet and fell 40 was quite a fat guy right so you fell forward on top of me so I'm like I'm on him way he was fat dude so I had him his head here yeah and he was laying on top of me he had your rings on I mean I couldn't say I can't remember, it was too long ago right

and yeah so now you come over dove and you start fucking welling on his ribs to get him off yeah tell your friend they were locked up they went to the ground if I was ever in a jam the motherfucker I'd want is dove David off yeah because he looks he looks like he fucking you know

writes poems in a notebook and fucking he's village and then plays the base for a punk band somewhere He is a badass motherfucker. I remember one time we went to the gym boxing and I hit you I hit my tooth a chip to tooth and you literally went Bobby you chip my tooth and then rattled off on my head I mean like 17 punches. Rrrrr, and I just was like, I staggered. I was like, I'm doing it in my head, chipped me tooth. That's what Colin and Keith do. My back punch, Colin on the way.

Yeah, yeah, you caught him nice in the body. You kept coming at me and he was hit me and that just fucking hooked him in the rib. You heard it. Yeah, Colin and Keith, yeah. So now, so now you cut to this fucking weekend, Jeff. You got some some crazy girl. Yeah.

Comes here to talk about being involved in a podcast ironically. And then she went off for four and a half hours. She was taking some kind of medication. And she went off for four and a half hours drinking on the medication. And then turned up four and a half hours later. And I think she, I think she was hoping for something different. Then I think she assumed that our meetup about Pokerz wasn't meant to be that. It was going to be a date.

But it was you. Well, I think that's what she hoped for. I don't know. It seems like it. I reread the messages she sent to me and she sort of talked about. I just stalked you online. Blah blah blah blah. But that's a turn of phrase in this day, and I mean, if you're talking to one of them.

But he was back to you, Kaiser Soze. I was something that was a heart and a smile event that I, and it was weird. It was really weird. I've never had someone like that. I think she was just a sweet girl who's just a little bit damaged and she was on some kind of medication. She drank heavily on that medication for four and a half hours

and came back to the venue and started shouting at friends of mine. I thought, Policeman, politically correct your own my show. No, I'm being honest. I don't think she's a bad person. I think she just, I think she's just a little bit intense and she's like, for me on, yeah,

and like on some medication. I, you know, I'm never like, I should flip the fuck out. She did, yeah, because I told her, I said exactly what, amen. I went, listen, I don't know why you're having to go at my friends and their girlfriends because I'm talking to them. I owe you nothing. I have no responsibility to you. We meant to talk about a podcast for half an hour, right? I said goodbye to you four and a half hours ago And you've come back drunk and now are acting crazy like we weren't on a date. There was nothing like that I don't understand how you can misconstruer are not talking to you anymore when as soon as I said that she was angry And she started shouting at Rory Albanese's girlfriend and her friend to a married with kids going You bitches need to respect yourself. Bl respect yourselves blah blah she was really rude.

You packed themselves with what? We did. Because they're family so we're talking to them. That's what one of the girls said she was like what do you mean I need to respect my husband and my two kids that I. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah and then SD asked her to leave. Now did you go outside and fight with her? And Dove came in and did a round of two. Dove took us straight out. First time he took one look at her and just laid her up. So she went after SD?

So she was very rude, she was very angry. And SD said, look, just ignore her, she's crazy. So I did, I sat down. And then she started getting very aggressive with SD. The Bounces asked her to leave. It's very difficult to throw a go out of a venue. You know that. You can't do that.

If there's a guy you pick him up, you throw him in the middle. Try to throw him out of your hotel room. It's your honor. You're a fuck out of here, you fucking asshole. But then if you know, so the guy at the bounce would be very careful. They call the police to come down because they, you know, you have to be very careful in that situation

with the girl who's wasted. Yeah. And they asked us to leave an SD. When SD asked the told us she had to go, she swung an SD in quarter a bit. She really, man, it was really quick. She swung an SD. It was really bad, yeah. Now,, it was ludicrous. She swung it as it was really bad. Yeah. Now is she gonna be on your podcast?

She's helping you? Yeah, I mean, so we've got like a couple more days. She would be the best person to have on a show. I would love to have her on the show. We have a run we just fucking fuel her up with medication and booze by the end of it. She's got you cocks. Yeah, I would watch it. Where's Jeff? Yeah, exactly. That's, I would watch it. Where's Jeff? Yeah, exactly, that's it. That's the name of your show, where's Jeff?

No, it's gonna be cool, it's gonna be called Crazy and the Hair, it's like, it's gonna be good. I don't know, she's just, yeah, I think, anyway, so I had to block her on the social media and block her number on my iPhone because, you know, she had my number and stuff, it was like, they're wearing them. So basically, I've noticed my reception here in America has been

exceptionally warm with some people. Understand that it's been offset. This is two extremes is what I've experienced here in New York. The extreme lunacy of that girl or the extreme violence of that man who's like, you know, again, just a sad person and then also extreme friendship and kindness from people. Well, here's what I want to say to you. I want to welcome you To you know, we're actually bringing her in We're gonna bring her in now And bring the guy in here I love that Talk yeah

You know fucking famous that be That's fucking actions. Can you or an actor actor. Oh I can't you're on the new FF series You should be on my fucking show. Thank God you don't play drums. I do actually play drums Do you really actually do I want to play a drum? I'm not for my with what's gone. I do I do I play a And you could be able to play drums though to play the role I can just have to make it well, you know what what, you could have, and we had a stunt drum

around it, we had a guy Charlie, who, you know, but I was like, I wanted to be there. She got the guy who plays various in Game of Thrones to be your stunt drummer. I have that. Where's that? We're actually folded it because you're English and we like that. But we, uh, we, uh, I was, that actually gave me an eye to it. Well, I mean, it's because you chose not to give anything because it's intimidating to support my jokes.

I support you. I support you, mother. That was absolutely perfect. That was perfectly fine. There's nothing I love English. There's the one thing I do hang about English. That was French. Is that they compliment their own jokes.

It's like, we do that. You don't tell us if it's funny. We let you know. It was all right. It was worthy of a chuck. Yeah, in front of regular people. We're fucking professional comedians. Okay. Um, we, uh, yeah, I had to learn the drums. I didn't have to. I could have just had them whatever, um, shoot around me and have some of you. But I thought it'd be cool. It was my opportunity to learn how to play drums. And, um, they gave me a really good good Charlie, uh, who taught learn how to play the drums. And they gave me a really good good Charlie

who taught me how to play Bill Hayward. And I said, fuck it, let's do it. So now I can play the drums. A year and a half later, I can play, I'm not fucking great, but I can play a little bit. What kind of songs can you play? I can play ACDC, I can play, you know, so I can play rock, anything rock.

Can I ask why I no longer have a webcam facing me you do no I know which one is facing me right here buddy you're on webcam that's on you nobody I'm going to attractive you show you show this insecure English douche yeah that's a good look we got you here that thing is real I also you I'm sure you controlling this people on a on a PlayStation controller yeah incredible wow massive game again I I spend many hours on PlayStation so I also you are you controlling this people on a on a PlayStation controller. Yeah, it's incredible Wow, I'm a massive game again. I I spend many hours on PlayStation. Oh nice PS4. PS4. We are a state. All right come We are no, sorry. I have side conversation. We're sure I've ever done. I'll never ever

Literally, I can't wait to fucking end this episode. I'm glad it's a Thursday show No, I'm kidding you guys are great So I'm glad it's a Thursday show. No, I'm kidding. You guys are great. How good do you feel, Dave? No, I'm kidding. You know, I fucking love it. I don't feel good. I'm wearing a neck, chief of shame.

That's why I'm here. You're fucking great. Anyways, I want to get to you. You really, you came to the States when? But almost three months ago now. That's it. I don't even hear longer. And what, where are you from England?

Are you from that your whole life? Yeah, from London. London, what made you come over here? To perform with, Well, I mean, originally it was to perform with people like you. And now I realize how much you hate me. I'm just trying to, I fucking love you. You're out of your mind.

It doesn't be trying to work out my root back. I can actually, I'm just spending my money. I'm fucked, I can't even get hired before the flight. I can even listen to comics that don't like you, but I'm not one of them. I'm actually a fan. It's something that it hurts. You're doing this show coming up this Sunday. I can perform with the best comics on the planet

in New York City at the Comedy Cellar, whereas in England, I can headline shows for, you know, for people that love the comedy the night they're there, but a lot of them are hands and stagdews and birthday pies, and they don't invest in you as a comic and the other people on that bill are a lot of those green rooms that are filled with people in the UK who hate especially road comics who hate comedy they seem to do it because it's the only thing they can do but they hate what they're doing and they hate the other comics and they hate everyone who's on TV and I couldn't do

with that negativity anymore whereas here they're going to be wrong I know there's negativity everywhere in every profession, but I feel like there's a community here of comics who actually love what they're doing. That's the difference. Are you friends with Jimmy Carr? Yeah, yeah. He's not like close friends, friendly acquaintances. I love him. He's the reason I'm here with him.

And Stella, he introduced me to SD and said you should get his guy on, but he's one of the nicest guys. But then again, the man's a millionaire, multi-millionaire, and doing very well for himself. So I feel like he's in a position where he doesn't have to be negative about the people because he's kind, I'm doing well, and I'm happy. You know, there's something to that, is that, you know, kind of bugs me

when these millionaires spout off shit, the serenity, serene, hey man, it's like, yeah, it's easy, I think it's a little easier for you to say that or be relaxed. When you don't have to worry about your fucking mortgage or where you're going to be in 10 years. You can go one or two ways. Yeah, but it doesn't make it any less true. If you're a nice guy or a nice girl before you make it.

It's not true, though. You become a nice person who's made it. Ray Romano is an excellent example. One of the people who's been nice to me here in New York is Ray Romano, which for me is weird because Ray Romano for me is one of the biggest American acts we see in England because it's one of the only shows that we get over there, you know, you don't get sex roles in a rock-a-roll? Not, yeah, I'm sure we do, I'm sure we do, I'm sure we will. But you understand what I'm saying, it's very strange for me to meet someone like, ah,

who never overruns when he does a spot, you know the first time he did he did a spot you asked me do you mind me jumping on to do 15 before you? He's a great guy and like what am I gonna say? I'm like you can really remind her you can do whatever the fuck you want Dude, but he asked me and that's a comic. He's a comic Yeah, of course. That's a real comic. I don't I don't know people get a lot of credit for that Because people behave and do she ways, but that's how everyone should behave. Yeah. Yeah. You know, you just used to should pal get non doing 60 minutes of crowd work, but that's how everybody should behave. Just be decent. Yeah, some guys don't don't. And some, but I don't think about being a millionaire. There's something people,

like I remember Chris Rock came in one time, and it was just, we were trying to get more money for our spots. Yeah. He was like, you don't need, you don't deserve it. You don't need it. These aren't, this is like a pay, yeah, yeah, pay, it's like, it's easy for you to say that because some guys actually pay their rent, which bought money, and that can, how are they, what if they can't do that? What if they're arguing with you? So you're saying that because you don't give a fuck

about the money, yet you still take the 50 bucks, so 100 bucks now, when they do, it's like, come on man, yeah, of course, yeah, you're right. So, but Jimmy Carr is one of, I mean, another one of those great guys. I mean, one of the nice people, I'm pretty sweet that. Yeah, I like it.

I mean, you say like, you're, you're anglophiles in some sense that you like the British thing where you have a bit of a ponzo of the British thing. I do, I know everybody. You, you know, we never have a group of who can't stand your British. I mean, I actually like it.

There are other people that you respect. I mean, every time I've met a British comic I like of course Jimmy yourself when I toured in England I mean in in Canada I've I know there's something about it like when I saw what's his name the fucking the guy just like a girl. What's his name Russell brand? No, hey, is it oh? He is it. Oh, he is it. Yeah, but I Russell brand too His comedy I know people give him shit. I know people like I'm not comic anymore though. All right fine, but I liked him when he I like I like him when he does stuff

I did when he ruined Arthur he ruined my one of my favorite was all time literally was Yeah, I by that man But he's not an idol. I still like him. He's not an actor though. That's the point He was very good and get him to the Greek he was a mentee good in that Absolutely. He's playing himself. Oh, there is it was just himself When he had to actually well, he was again those games playing himself when he had to play a character Arthur He's not a comic. He's not an actor. What is he? Well, no, no, he was a comic He was a brilliant comic. Then he became a political activist. As you know, yeah, so mostly what he does now is tells young people To not vote in the British elections. That's the way to

I think it's an idiot back up back up back up back up back up what the fucky? I don't know any of this So back to this when did this happen and why did it happen? Okay, pride. Pride to the recent British elections. Russell Brown went online and his whole campaign was we're going to have a revolution. We need to revolt against the government. And his way of doing that was to tell young people in our country in Britain, UK, don't vote. That's your way to make your stand. We need to not vote. We need to take it to the streets as activists.

Then the day after, he's an idiot, the day after online registration for voting had closed, he realized, oh god, I've been telling young people not to vote and I have a voice that is being listened to. And he said, you know what, actually we should all vote Labour because they're probably the lesser of two evils for this country. So vote Labour, he did that 24 hours after online voting at close. So these young people couldn't vote anyway or register to vote because he didn't know because he doesn't know much about politics. He just knows what sells

his book. Ultimately he's a charlatan who was selling copies of his book Rev Love Ocean. And you know, the guys like the guy and I have had lots of personal experiences. I've talked about it before. Like what? I've never heard of it. Yeah, we had some we had some personal teams with the same age. have had lots of personal experiences. I've talked about it before. Like what? I've never heard of it. Well, we had some personal teams with the same agent. Was he mad at your hair? No, he was fake. No, what?

I mean, isn't it sad to think that there's probably some truth in that kind of statement? Because who had this look? I mean, you guys are similar. He was styled by a woman named Sharon Smith. It was one of his closest friends who he then subsequently fired a few years later because they had a little hook up and it went awkward.

But she styled him. You can see old footage of him on MTV when I was a little rock kid living in Camden wearing silver jewelry along here in skinny jeans. He was wearing Stonewashed denim, had like frosted tits in his hair. He was a heroine addict doing MTV shows. And then she re-styled him around the Amy Wine House, you know, the Liberty and the

Pete Dock Tee and like the living room, Amy Wine House. So she re-starled him in that way. And then he became very popular, did Big Brother's Big Mouth and that launched his career. So he was starved that way. But he respects that. You've always been there. I've always been there. You've always been there.

I've always been a rock dude. That's my look, right? Are you saying you played drums? You're in a band? I was, yeah. I sang in a punk band. I played drums in a Sousa and band actually that was why I play drums in yeah yeah and jazzed me wow but anyway are you are you like a real musician no no no absolutely not I'm a I'm a comic I'm not a musician I'm a comic in an actor but he um but I and I had the utmost respect for Russell until

the day I went to LA to spend some time with him and our mutual we had an eight the same agent and he this was prior to stand up and he made me feel pathetically small in a room full of people. He has sex on? No, I just... No, I would have been hugely bigger than him if that had happened. Do you have a big piece? I have a big dick. What? Oh my god, I love the way he says it. I really do. That was the confidence. It's true though, like you have a car. You're you're you're you're doing you

want to do what you don't and it's like that's the only one you don't. I always say always say it's my thing. I know I don't have a what is stereotypally seen as a good looking face in the sense I'm not the hot guy next to I'm not that guy. What I do I have is a sense of humor and a nice cock and when you're old the only things that remain is you're dick your dick and your sense of humor. That's what you need. That's what you know. They've got to have a kid. I can go back to your heart with a fire pit.

You can go fire bed. You look at how many funny guys have hot women. And the reason is because as long as they can please the woman in a bedroom and they can make them laugh, that's what you fucking need. Here's the thing with me though, my dick has really gone south. It's shriveling.

I'm trying to lose weight again. I'm really trying to lose weight. for me though, my dick has really gone south. It's shriveling into the sky. I'm trying to lose weight again. I'm really trying to lose weight. And one of the factors just to get my dick back. Can I, I'm sure. No, no, well, yeah, absolutely. I'm sure. I can't look at it.

You know, let's get some candles and put on some sharday. I'm being deadly serious. Like, do you listen to this probably in this anyway already? Yeah, what's up? But you're a very handsome man. The photo of you downstairs on the wall of the comedy side.

The sexy, barry, right, man. Everybody knows that. I think you're joking about it. I've still got it in the face here in this part of the face. It's a bit of a sense of the phone. How hard do you think it would be for you to lose that way? Well, I mean, it's dieting exercise, right? It depends.

I can't lose it now the way I used to lose it by just fucking ripping it up. It's a jam. And kind of, because my heart, I mean, it's not an exercise. It depends. I can't lose it now the way I used to lose it by just fucking ripping it I'll see you married and cut them because my heart. I don't want my heart to go up and down I got a I got a slowly fucking go down and wait I got a heat right is your food right are you doing right now for last month I'm eating perfect like literally perfect and what do you what do you shift then you shift in my shift carbohydrates And I shift sugar. I don't have sugar. I have sugar from fruits. I have carbohydrates from from Sorry, I'm in white you got you shift in pounds every month 15 months. I lost 15 pounds. I lost so far. That's great in a month, but Yeah, it's great, but it's You know, it's I mean really man

I feel like shit when I I feel bad for my wife It's like, you know, I'm at the best time of my life right now. I'm at a great part of my career. And, you know, I'm at a great part of life. Not just career, my career is cool. I do comedy, but my house, my backyard, everything's in this great little thing.

And right now, I feel bad. Is it you don't feel like you're in the right shell for that? I just physically, it's like, okay like okay I get it we did it. But you're on the show, right? I mean you do. There's what fucking threw me off around it two years ago I was doing no sugar no grains lost 45 pounds kind of back on it and then the show got picked up and literally you can see in the pilot episode I'm thinner than the second episode

because they were like do what are you doing? Like the guy is this, you know, if they casted that it would have been a fat ball guy. Right, right, right. And so it was, it was, um, I, but I took it too far. And now it's like, I got to get back, I got to go back to where the guy was. Yeah, I know I will do. I will. I was thinking about this the other day, I've like recently been trying to get fit again And I realized the reason is because I'm looking at the shallow industry that we might be in all three of us act

Yeah, and in the acting world you have to go what is my role and what do I need to look like I'm six four I'm never gonna be the funny Badger No, I'm never gonna be funny best friend. I'm never gonna be that. I'm never gonna be the guy next to I'm gonna have to be the big rocker guy So I'm gonna have to get some bigger muscles, I need that if I come. Here's the thing, you don't look like a crack addict, eat like a russle. So you're a big guy on film. I have to be bigger, you're going to be shredded or thinner.

Exactly, exactly. So I need to get that look, and I realized that if I genuinely, if I genuinely was comfortable in who I was, I'd be fat, I'd be happy being fat. I'm serious, because I feel like I actually quite like he in loads of food and I like drinking and I sit around and I like, and maybe. That's funny too. What am I saying?

You're gonna be careful, how old are you? 31. You're gonna be careful, dude, because you're very young. I at 31 I was pretty in shape. My metabolism is slowing down, right? Yeah, so you're gonna be careful, like a guy, like you're saying he's one of guy. Why do you wanna lose weight? Is it because you wanna lose weight

or because the side-t makes you feel fat? You're not gonna be a fat tall guy stinks. You know what I mean? You're right. That's hard, man. A little fat dude is funny. A tall fat guy is awkward. And you know, you get, so you know,

from 30 to 40 is where it started coming in. As soon as I could afford whatever food I wanted, I go to a grocery store and buy what I have with the fuck I want. There was a time when I only could eat twice a day, maybe. So I had to, I had to, you know, have food here. Bobby was African. Yeah. Well dude, I just had the cash. Yeah, two more 40 miles for a water. I didn't have 40 miles for water. I didn't have food here. Bobby was African. Yeah. Well dude, I just have the cash man.

Yeah, two more four in a row. I got it. I didn't have 40 miles from water yet. I didn't have fucking money. I didn't, I mean when I first moved here, I didn't have a fucking dime, dude. Yeah, sure. I was eating once a day and it was at the seller.

Yeah, I get like a maybe an egg sandwich in the morning and then I was hustling all fucking day doing shit. But now it's like when the happier you get, you know, you get a house, you get a fucking car from you. Two cents back from the zoo. I'm not a bit. I can I can go buy I go get my car and go buy nine bags of chips Yeah, sure and nobody's gonna say shit my wife I can trick my wife in two seconds I can be like look I can't eat anymore shit no okay no more shit and the next day All right, just one more you know one more ice cream all right just one more

I mean you know cuz she she wants me to be happy. She's not gonna She doesn't want to fucking deal with that shit like you know, I was did you use to party a lot? And is it is this maybe a replacement for the I'll have something so much Well, yeah, I talked about him before I'm out in some way. I've talked about it before it's it's you know I'm a recovering addict for 30 29. I've been so before I'm a rena's back. I'm right to be in a bit of feminine charm What's a rena? You just lost weight. I lost a long way. Look at how you're going to look. You lost a lot of weight. You do look good. Yeah, she

lost a lot of weight. You look great. She's been working out. Yeah, but it's because Marina likes young boys. No, not anymore. I mean, I actually don't like Marina taking on all comments. You don't like them, but you like like, duh, you're never going to be fat. No, no, no, I mean, I could, I could, you know, I still move around a lot, I run my bicycle. I mean, that's my, that's the, if I could have a body in this room,

I'd want Doug's body. I've always wanted, I've always wanted Doug's body. Why don't you just take him out for dinner? I'm just here at the right. I've always, I'm gonna say this, and I'll take you out for dinner. I've always looked at Doug's body and be like, that would be the perfect body for me.

Yeah. If I could pick a cup of water. You could do it. Yeah, you could do it. You could do it. Not that body. Yeah, so much rubber. Yes, you could. Yeah, he could. There's not a need for a rubber to relax. No, you know, this is the irony.

We're the same. You on that photo on the stairwell. Oh, Bob, it's totally like that. Like, you look like that. No, not that. Robert, you have to do it. Robert, you have to do it. You could do it.

It's not an age restriction. It's all that belief in you can do it. I know, I know. I'm going to answer man. It's all that belief and I know I know I know I know I know I'm I'm gonna answer man. There's no two ways about can I say something about that too? Okay, I lose weight I go back to being a little cuter even though I'm bald. No, it's hard. I get marriage. It's all yeah You know what you understand? I don't want now. Okay right now. I get no fucking chicks Right, right, right if they're coming up they're going up to you and you and you all right And then you and then him and you and you. All right.

And then you and then him and then people at the end. Yeah. Really loves me. Is the haircut. I don't get fucking shit right now and it's kind of easier that way. Absolutely. You know, if a girl does walk a lot, if a girl does, come on, absolutely, Chris, you're saying,

oh, the reason to stay a bit heavier is because it's not the whole. It's not the whole right but it's it's a weird shit about it because it was like that absolutely if it's a hot chick is that's me right now want to fuck it she's she's nuts

she's literally out of the sun not true absolutely yes i would you fuck me right now on air and let's do it I'm in all honesty I would fuck you I'm dead serious there is nothing about you that I'm not a true

I totally agree with the marina you're very I respect your wife I'm gonna be honest to you no Bobby didn't know what to do I fuck you too yeah you say something, you say something, you know, I think you're the top. Yeah, I think you're the top. I'm the only guy in the room that won't bang you, but I'm the heterosexual.

As soon as you let me be a power button. Oh yeah, yeah. I don't want to go meet. I'm gonna like Chinese finger trep. Yeah, yeah, fucking good. And it's not the whole women aren't visual creatures thing. It's that like you're actually a, you're like a doorbell. Women are shallow as well. You're making that like women're actually a don't you're like a

shallow. You're making that like women a shadow you're talking about like like you know some really good red. I know a girl who still talks about you to this day. Really? Yeah. Her name is Marina. Stop trying to carry it. I don't know her. She's is really an open relationship She takes photographs. She still talks about your thing. What do you talk about me? How as a palestinian about how sexy you are? We're no she says she's like I would see her stall and I know people to think you're sexy No, she was like you you Women do know your marriage. Marina will bang your right marriage

She was like you you women do know your marriage Marina will bang your right marriage So if I come in when I say look at my wife we Why don't you bring Marina and why don't you put it in Marina you'd bang me go ahead if I broke up my wife Let's do it. Yes. Thank you. Yeah, would you move up to Westchester women? I'm not a home man. No Bobby's in open Related to be singing Bob your swing and I love you. I love your family. I'm not a home man. No, Bobby's in open. I love your wife. Bobby. I love you. I love your friend I'm not a swing. How do you feel about raising another woman's children? I would never I love Robert and his family. I love what he has. Well, how much? I love the family.

I love these. You know, to raise them. Well, Jeff, would you move up to us? Absolutely. Marina's going. I'm going to. On a sad night after the divorce shore. I give you a little. Okay, well, I mean, now I'm fucking, I can't look you're in the eyes. I can take those days out. No, but you're, I look, I love everything that you have is, is more beautiful than whatever it is you think a woman coming up to you would be. That's not possible.

Well, I understand what you're saying, but my point is this, is that, you know, I'm alone on the road, I I'm out in the bout and then I get kind of shredded and then some hot fucking tattoo chick hey you know and and then it's like you know I don't like to be tough to walk but he's right is it's all an excuse man it really is it's all the fucking excuse and it's it's it's it's horse shit and I get it and it took me 45 years to understand that it's all an excuse and it's it's horse shit and I get it and it took me 45 years to understand that it's all an excuse and It's it's literally just the food. I eat you do that. It's it's the food. I fucking eat irrespective of whether you're thin or big I don't know what that means irrespective, but yes irrespective of the size of your body

You will do that shape you want to I actually think if you were if you were if you had the body that you felt proud about You were happy about the one that you won. Happy, you're happy. And your body would be happy with it. Well, all right. Thumbs of dream. I'm glad I'm like 30% there for you. What I'm saying is, if you had that body,

I don't think you go fucking about. If girls are throwing themselves that way, you feel good and you go home and you fuck your wife twice as good because you'd be happy about it. I don't know if you understand addiction. Yeah. But yeah, I feel like I do. I did a documentary about sex addiction. What was it called? A called Confessions of a Sex Addict. And but were you are you? I was the right answer. I'm a doctor documentary about sex

addiction. You're a sex addict. According to the documentary yeah. But are you a sex addict? I think I'm an escapist. I don't think I'm an addict of anything. I'm an escapist. Can you can you can you have sex all at once, I don't think I'm gonna add it to anything, I'm an escapist. Can you get more beer? Do you have sex all at once? I don't think it's a joke, it's a joke. I don't think, I don't need another beer. I want more, I don't need it. Do you have sex a lot? I used to, yeah, I used to fuck everything.

Well, not men, but every woman. I used to fuck women because I could. Like any woman that ever remotely showed an interest, I'd have sex with. Now I'm very selective, I like women who I feel like I could bond with. I'll have some kind of connection. Homo. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha chat room people James pasquise as brody stevens and dug Benson turned down pussy after every show it's sickening i guess he knows in person it's fucking stupid okay what else you got

uh... there's a whole discussion about how you asked your guests how big their dick is like how it's turned does uh... i guess the compliment i don't know i just i find it a kind of a trade i don't know i don't think it's mean i don't think it's a common trade i think it's a compliment. I don't know. I just I find it kind of treat. I don't know. I don't think it's me. I don't think it's a comment trade. I think it's a guy thing to want to know if a guy says I have a big piece. I do. Yeah, yeah, you're question. Let me ask you an honest question to the man in the room and Marina. I mean, maybe you do it as well. Oh, I don't think the women look at each other's vaginas in the bathroom, but I don't think of the opportunity. I will always look at the guy next to me when he's having a piss

that you're on, I will always have a cheeky little flip of the eyes because you want to know if you're bigger than that guy, no, no, I mean, you never look, because here's a deal, I know, I look in locker rooms, I'm not your head, I know, wait a minute, stop, stop, stop a minute, stop, stop, stop, stop, no, you wait a minute, shut the fuck up, will you look in locker room when I was playing baseball in college. Yeah, you were looking at guys pieces. It's always hard to fucking not Look it out looking right there. I'd like you look. Yeah, exactly. What? First of all, what he's talking about I I kind of get I get because you have a big piece and you want to go You want to know if the guy is a big piece I get that I don't know

I want to show off. I want to show it is an insecure. All right. Let's mind secure Is it want to go all right? Look at this me? I don't have a big piece. Okay, I don't have a big no I don't have a big piece It's an average stick, but so I know I'm not gonna look at you dick. I'm not gonna be the same or smaller But you look at him but. I'm not gonna be the same or smaller, but you look at him But that we walk around the locker room naked or shower You don't like so you'd see the fucking guys. I think it wasn't like I was old look for it. It's more telling Nobody's more gay to avert your eyes like if I look at a dick that makes me gay

That's bullshit if you are so desperately again to look at another man's penis like oh it's there if a guy's Walking around when he's dick how and you see it So what it's just a dick you don't want it There's a difference between desperately looking and not looking yeah, but make it a difference between sizing it up Yeah, yes, yeah, so you're very you're very Jersey guy. You're a very Jersey guy right? You're a very Jersey guy. We've talked about it's been the past so there's certain aspects of your I know you're honest we get it that your comedy shut your fuck up listen you're honest we get it that you're comedy shut the fuck up yeah listen what I'm talking about two different things you being in next to a pisser and sneak

in a peak because you got a big sneak in a peak all right so you're looking over I just think it doesn't meet me homosexuals go no it makes you a fucking weirdo no it doesn't I don't loaning my stare it I don't like stare it it goes cock I'm just saying if I look down it says cock and go oh that's the right one on you know what you say if it's not all right I mean I don't say anything I don't go excuse me sir congratulations on your wonderful fellas I don't I did him next you snickering I mean I do do that I do do do that. What else you get the chair?

You know I do is like you You know I used to when I was a kid I was I used to go underneath the stalls of other women That's perverted. That's perverted my aunt told me that I did the hour remember But she said I would just go and see what other women had When I was 15 you were really You didn't even know. You were 9 years ago. But the fact that I think about that, like why I would at 9 want to look underneath the stall to see other women's dreams.

That's true. You're in dreams. We're talking about, he's a grown man with a beard, sneaking a peek at some fat guy next to him, but he sounds competitive. He sounds very perverted. Yeah, I'm saying that. I think it comesutates from somewhere. Do you feel comfortable on a TV or a TV?

It's not talking to each other, because it's a fucking annoying. Yeah. If you're gonna talk, you talk or he talks. Yeah, I haven't talked much, I'll talk. Go ahead. I don't feel like looking at it is, I don't avert or look. If it's in my line of sight I would not look away, I've heard, but I also don't care, or...

It's not a problem, it's not a problem. I'm not talking about going, looking at guys' dicks in the locker room, if you walk around and people are naked, you see it, you see it, that's it. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I don't know, you're saying different. No, you're saying different. I'm not.

You just said you'd take a glance at the guy next to you. I'm saying if I were to a Uino, when the guy's got his dick out in the Uino, I'm not gonna be like, I don't know, I mean mean like hide my eyes. Yeah, how can you not look? He's directly next to you. I walk up like this dude's there. I don't need to so you angle your Yeah, and I feel like that like staring straight forward and like pretend There's no like effort to stare straight forward. It doesn't dawn on me to look.

I just feel like you need to go over this and look like a dick. I'm apologizing to the fact that I don't want to look like a dick. I feel like it's so normal. No, there's no way. The exact thing you have to force you. I know, I got to force myself. I don't have a thought about it. I don't have a thought about it.

You have a thought about it. You have a thought about it. I'm just going to send you a photo. That's the easiest way to deal with it. I'm just going to start sending it for everyone. You have my number, right? I don't know a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it.

You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it.

You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it.

You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have a lot of thought about it. You have he wanted to pay and it goes This is a real dick measuring contest is what Jeff said. I realized from Jeff's perspective. Yeah, for me I just thought I had more money usually than people around me. It's like paper stuff Really so then that still is like an alpha male. No not at all. It's a generous guy thing. It's got nothing to do with alpha Why can you fucking guy everything is like? Why can you be the Why can you? Fuck it guy, everything is like, why can't you be the, get a purchase, get an alpha male,

now let me talk. It's not an alpha male thing. It's not an alpha male thing. It's, I like, hey, shout me that, it's not an alpha male thing. Let me speak. Am I wrong? I'm knocking over him, that's fine.

You've talked over me and you've been talking the whole time. I'm responding. Am I wrong? I'm not a good radioist. I'm not a good radioist. I gotta give people that time. So my point is, it's got nothing to do with ego at all. If I got a bunch of green in my pocket my friend doesn't I just pay for stuff. Okay. It's nothing alpha

How do you know your friend doesn't when they say let me buy this round because I'm wealthier than most comedians So I generally assume that that's the case. I've been does that but if someone says to you Yeah, let me get this round and you go now I, I got it. If I got a big bunch of money I thought that's an alpha male. I didn't do that. I think that's also a big bunch of anything Someone who calls their money doesn't think about it That's what I'm telling you, Jersey. You got to me go shit going on. Don't project it on me It had nothing alpha about it. I took a credit card. I'm gonna go. I'll take that. I love that my generous That's also kind of like a Jersey thing I do that. I'm queen

So like if I buddy I'm like I got this round buddy. I take care of it I got next round but they might not fucking ever paying the money But I got it don't worry about it. This is my love show. We were from Cox to fucking paying a bill I see it's going through the motions Yeah, well, I do like men who don't have a thing about money Whether they come from it or not people who come from money can have a thing about money And I like the way Dove is it's like I just he's just really not thinking about it because he has it So that's like a good place to start

Why would that be why would that be an alpha thing? Because Why is that I was like why is that an alpha? Okay, don't be passive aggressive. You know let him answer but now because That wasn't that fucking right my wife that's my wife I'll wait my turn The bait of mail here wait from my fucking sense Well, that's good. You should

Shulbami nice things I'm gonna be your bitch That's good, you should. No, I'm getting good, Jim. I sure buy me nice things, I'm not gonna be your bitch. Because, like you say, I think to project your, oh my earnings are this and most of the comments are at this earning level. If someone in a bar, this is how I work, I'll always buy a drink, I'll always buy drinks people.

If that person then goes, hey, let me get this round. I go, all right man, it's yours. If you want to buy this round, you do that. I don't go, nah I got this I got this and pull out some green as you call it and let's start paying if someone offers to pay around I go well they wouldn't offer if they weren't in a position to pay that round and there was a frequent thing I can't believe we're arguing about the fact that we both are not on a page we're talking about our experience

it turned into one and it's that there was definitely an aggressive tone in your voice Yeah, but I'm not arguing This is a very female male argument I feel like it's so much so beautiful Who's the female and who's the male? Female male Why? Because he's the alpha male, right? Because you have a long, long, beautiful hair

You bat your eyes You bat your eyes and measure ego-related pieces What you mean measure ego really? How's it related to an ego? How's that related to an ego? You broke it down to alpha and beta and I said I it was a furthest thing from my mind Think alpha. I just thought here's a credit card It might be the first thing if you might I think you are subconscious I think you'll grow you've grown up in a in a society where

It's up in the guy is the fucking thing. You're I'm from Jersey I always pick up a tab. Hey, don't touch my fucking my thing. Hey, hey, well, yeah, we had an argument about chap's day We had an argument about chap's day. I have never seen dub do that with I've never seen Never going like this He's never had one second. I want. I want to pull out the cock core. I have a cock core, but I'm afraid Jeff will fucking judge my penis gavill.

But listen, listen, here's a deal. I understand what you're doing, but this is the definitely, I'm gonna say this as the guy on the outside right now, because I don't give a fuck about any of this. But as a guy on the outside, this is a very alpha male. You're being alpha passive and you're being alpha aggressive. So you're like, get the fuck and you're being like,

you're rolling eyes and shit, which fuck, yeah, you show the shrubs. Let's go fuck this out. And you know, you know how to push buttons on other alphas by you're still being a fucking alpha. I'm not listening to you. And here's the thing, you guys, you wanted to pay, you wanted to pay,

you're both nice guys, but it's a, it turned into like a fuck you thing, which it shouldn't, you should just go. We should take turns in paying. You should just go look, man, I got it. For me, take turns in paying for me. Yeah, by the way, hey for a comic that doesn't have money. No, all happily, I got for me take turns and paying for A comic doesn't have money. I Is the let me take some of that I wouldn't believe he's from Jersey when he told me because he's so

Man-hatten so his mother's a hippie Yeah, you know his brother is a fucking psychologist and a Brazilian jiu jitsu guy. I mean ever since I mean just a coach. You never met a Jersey guy. If you think my ex was a Jersey guy. Jersey dude I got fucking Jersey guys. I'm not saying that I never said that I was a Jersey guy. I said that he's he's he's he's he's you say you hate Jersey guys I said he's upbringing. That's what you said has been inferno. You'll never be a junk guy. You said you hate Jersey guys and you'll never play the man.

You'll never play. But I'm a bit of forget not as much. I hate them. Are you putting lip stuff on right now? Give him a moment so you can put lip gloss on. Can we get a close up of that? I just love it. Talk about alpha.

Hi, that's I gotta go in three minutes. I try a lips. I take acutane. Do I have to do a read on this one now? Yeah, I do. All right, let me do a read real quick. I gotta go in three minutes. I'm drawing it, so I take acutane from it. Do I have to do a read on this one now? Yeah, I do. All right, let me do a read real quick. I wanna get to Jeff. Also, this is a thing.

Oh, what's that? Oh, this is his thing, yeah, great. How long does he go for? We're gonna go for like, well, you're gonna wrap it up in like 20 minutes or so? I gotta go do a spot. Right now, come back up. Okay, I'll come back up after.

Jeffy, we're gonna do this read and then we're gonna get into what you're here for. You got a really cool show coming out. Um, I checked this out. Uh, I know you guys do fantasy football. It's starting right now. It's the biggest thing ever. Fantasy football has taken over, uh, regular football for God's sakes. I mean, I know guys that are just more into fantasy teams than they are the regular season. But here's the deal. You don't have to do this season-long commitment crap anymore. Okay? Your season-long fantasy football team may be going strong, but check this out. You don't have to wait till week 16 to get paid. Put your fantasy skills to the test every goddamn week at

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DraftKings.com, that's DraftKings.com. I just built coffee. I got a lot of great stuff. Keep dove up there. Louis and Amy. Louis downstairs and Amy Schumer. Oh shit. So can you text Duff and get him back up here? Great.

That was a very interesting conversation. I liked it. I love these two fucking gazelles, mashing horns. I loved it. Gazelles. You've described this as very beautiful. I did. I don't want to say rams.

Balletic. Balletic. Don't you know you are. You just want to fuck and get me, don't you? I love his guy. Then what do we got in the chat room, buddy? Rick Rock 5 says, I guarantee Marina is not wearing a mashing set of underwear. He's right. They will not. They will not. To my act apparently. Really? I talk about it.

I don't wear mashing underwear. I just got finished talking to the stage. To the crowd. I just told the whole crowd, how I don't care. You know what I'm saying. I've been told. So I've been told. What kind of briar you get on? My underwear, actually, I'm going to be completely

honest with you right now. Looks like moths have had a field day with them. You have holes in your underwear. Absolutely, right now. I just couldn't find a pair. What happens? How does that happen? Does your pussy deteriorate the cotton?

What the fuck? How does it happen? The dry cleaner. You dry clean your fucking panties? Or the person, the woman who washes my underwear, like this detergent is too strong, I think. So it goes on your pussy after that? Well, no, it's like, it puts holes in my panties.

And then I like, but I like those panties. Oh God, I'm, all right. And what else? They're like cougar panties. So you can't really tell. It kind of looks like like paw scratches. What? You know?

So someone was trying to get in. Yeah. What else you got? I love these panties. But they were right. They're right. What else you got? I don't know. These kids, but they were right. They're right. What did she got? The tech 9 says, I just got here, is Jeff Leech like a life coach or something? Yeah. I'm a death coach. I was systematically bringing you closer to yours. You're own mortality. What else you got? A knife song says, if you make political choices based on what Russell Brand says you shouldn't be voting anyway. You're right. You're right. I can't. I can't believe that

by the way. I didn't know that was happening. I actually was a fan of Russell Brand. I really was. I thought he was great. I thought he was great and get him to the Greek. I thought there was a great movie. It's first book was very good. And it's sad when people believe their own hype sad when he does it he did a tour called a psych complex and then he now just generally believes that Which is a shame? It was very very funny as a stand-up. I think you should that clip of him on a I think it was like far I think of CNN You're right. He's very poise. He's very great Yeah, but I mean it's easy to be eloquent when you have you know multisolabic words

I you disposal really is he's well read but he's also a man who reads so funny I do not let them muscle you out of that beautiful fucking language I love it Hey why are you so down on me what's wrong with your marina Marina let's get to the crux list right Marina my first time over here Marina absolute dormi I kiss her and she loves that shit and then I brought a girl I brought a date into the cellar and I tried to introduce to Marina Marina not true

Absolutely I don't need this cafe. I just want to get bring back to I want does a fame with fame meter just got shut down oh wait a second what happened because you get Louis downstairs and yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah they're going on yeah no no I'm I'm happy to go all right anyways I just want to do this right now check this out of my my friend of mine Alan leftets, his son has a premiere. It's called The Dog Wedding. It's a movie. It's... I just did a voice.

Oh, you did. Oh, good. I'm playing his Gary Gorman's friend. No shit. I'm school. Yes. It's a comedy starring the wrestler Matt Bloom. It opens on Monday, September 21st, at 7pm in Boston, at the AMC lows at the Boston Common. All proceeds go to various charities, so you'll be helping other charities out.

Look, they don't have a lot of time to build the audience for this. So you guys, don't wait, just get your tickets. Okay. Again, it's at the AMC lows at the Boston Common. It's 7 p.m. on September 24th. Monday September 21st. What's up? I was just going to say it's hilarious and there's a trailer. If you want to check out the trailer, it's on YouTube now. Just search dog winning. Yeah. Very funny. Absolutely. Go to YouTube. Check out the dog winning search for that. Check

out the trailer. And then if you're from the Massachusetts Connecticut and Hampshire area, go to it. Just get your tickets. Again, it's the dog wedding, Matt Blooms in it, and it's Monday, September 21st, at 7 p.m. Dog wedding? Yeah, it's a movie. In Boston, at the AMC Loals, at the Boston Common. Can we talk about my rebound?

I played a dog, I played a dog. Really? That's genuinely, I just did it yesterday That's great, man, so you're in it. I'm in it. I'm in it. I'm for you. How'd you get that? Gary Omen, oh job really he's a friend of mine I'm wondering why didn't give me the fucking call because you're not British. It was a British boy. I can play a British guy Congratulations, Jeff. Please. All right. Let's see you as the best let's see you as the best British accent in here right now I want to go for a kid dude. I'm gonna go. you're gonna try it. No, you're too good. You do No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, a conversation with him. Hey Marina, how you doing? I'm fine. How are you?

I'm sorry, but what did you do? What the fuck was that? I'm absolutely brilliant. Alright, yeah, so today. Today? What did you do today? What I did today was I worked out. I did a little of kind of aesthetics or whatever you call it.

Where in Eastern Europe are you from? What's the goal? Jeff, what are you saying? I'm losing it. I'm losing it a bit because when you do a British accent you have to imagine as if you are stepping on a cup of tea. Yes. That's what it is. I mean you don't.

You have to like as if you are having a bit of tea as if you were like I mean that is a region is it not? What the fuck is it not? What the fuck is your mouth? Duff, you go. I was pretty. Thank you, Duff. Can you do a perfect set of em?

I mean, I've looked in it out. I cannot. Isn't that shit too bad? Wait a minute, Duff, what did you do today? What didn't I do, Bobby? That's the best thing ever. Did you do a lot of stuff? I certainly did. Oh, let me try to James Cagney. Yes, I certainly did you did you do a lot of stuff? I certainly did Let me try to James Kegney. Yeah, I certainly did I said you did all right. Oh, did you I couldn't stop doing stuff

Where the fuck is that from it's not actually that bad because it's a little bit He's doing a very good act of things keeping it succinct. He's keeping the line short He's doing a very good act to things keeping it succinct. He's keeping the line short I'm getting jealous. Oh you don't get jealous. Americans have this view that we're either the queen We're either we either speak like this or the I was drinking tea with my friends and we were dancing in the in the square So you think they're like dick Van die. So look at me. I'm a bloody cockney. Oh, we go a richy movie I think of that I think I'm a nice like that, you know, you're gonna be like a nice relaxed

Yeah, that's good. I'm gonna do a Dublin accent man gonna be like relax, you know, musician from don't I'm clon in Smith, you know, a room Yeah, that sounds like a grown man. You got it. What about Scottish? That's quite Jackson. It's quite easy You know, you just throw out and it's yeah from Glasgow or Edinburgh It depends on where you're from exactly. Don't get me clad from the clan. McLeod They can only be one robby violated robby violated over China rub

from the land of last school That was the worst I love this year I think I can fucking do it Okay, I'm a black girl and I'm doing a Self-traumatina You sound like a professional It sounds like a stroke You sound like a snube lying

There's a bit of a thing between the Irish and the Scottish, and the British, yeah. So wait, what? I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. What the fuck is that? What the fuck was that?

Sounds like drug addict. That's a disaster. Oh, shit. That reminds me of your head up. There's a tattoo, this guy got, he put a pussy inside his armpit. So when he raised his armpit, looked like a big hairy pussy. Oh, that's great.

Anyways, all right. So Jeff, you're here for a specific reason. You're... So hang out with nice people who I think are talented. Well, you know what? It's like three of my favorite comics at the set of actually. This is great. Oh, thank you, buddy.

Are you serious? Yeah, people ask me that a lot. They ask me who, so, and I've said, I've asked that question before that I've said that you're one of my favorite MCs to ever come onto because you made, no, but because, but babe, you've MCed a lot of the shows I've done. So you made the entire room feel night because you're watching MCs. I didn't, I said three of my favorite comics. You have happened to MC a lot of shows So you're one of my And also to my favorite Dan

I've asked that question before anyway, and you were my answer That was very nice. So I ignore the compliment is fine Yeah, I don't know if you're gonna find it Jeff just funny. I didn't I didn't think he was funny when I first You know when new guys come in you don't you know because as a comic you see so many guys it but then when somebody's funny You're like like how cool if I don't watch people and then I finally watched him and I was impressed yeah No, that's nice when you see new people because you don't see a lot of new people I only watch new people want to go to the bathroom right I'll go on the bathroom I'll be taking my piss and then I look like in get 30 seconds to somebody because that's when I really hear them

Like I don't really want to go down and watch because I don't want to fuck with them have me in the doorway And yeah, oh, I don't want to you know, but if I'm I'll go through the bathroom and I'll listen That's when I was like oh this guy's funny. Yeah, yeah, but you got this show coming up this Sunday that we're doing Yeah, so I'm doing a show. Yeah, it's so her house in the meatpacking district It's gonna be a probably so it's called the Pretty Late, but not incredibly late show with Jeff Leach. Right. And I have a core group. So it's myself as the host and compare and then there's Dave Hill from. I just did a show. I just did Tom Papa show. He's great, Dave Hill. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I just find it by. No, you didn't. When I said,

no, Tom Papa show. No, no, no, let me finish the sentence. I bought humtocas Dave Hill and Tom Papa on the stage at the same time. Oh, right. And I said, no, no, no, let me finish the sentence. I bought him because Dave Hill and Top Hopper on the stage at the same time. I love rap. No, I said, there hasn't been this much head weight on a stage in a lot of time. Just because they both have massive heads. And I thought I was going to kill the crowd right? You're right, they didn't. Nobody fucking got-

It was hilarious though. I think they have- That's a comic funny. They weren't on the stage at the the time they had to think about it He's with you on this. Yes, so he's kind of like my right-hand man. He's my You know my compadre Music of all does that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and then there's also gonna be a house bank called tequila mock-in-bae Which is fronted by Colin Smith

Who funds the village on the ground bands and he plays here at a cellar. So these guys are not going to be doing like a blue grass kind of Americana style thing. And then we're going to have two fantastic guests, which is going to be Ling Coppillets opening. And then Bobby Kelly, everyone in the audience. That's what it's been like on the show. How's it go? It's a chat show.

It's a, it's a, it's a, an irreverent alternative chat show with music, comedy and chat. So we're going to come out and do our stand-up and then we sit down. And then after we're going to sit down on some arm chairs, we're going to have a bit of a chat. We're getting to the knit and gritty. Right, knit and gritty. We're getting to the knit and gritty. Knit and gritty. Knit and gritty.

Knit and gritty. Yeah. I was marina saying the knit and gritty. She's juggling that. I was tackling that. That's your English accent. Your English accent is very... don't talk like that. That's your English accent. Your English accent is very... Nittagritte.

That's a good idea. Nittagritte. Are you? Did you just get out of another relationship in the arena? I did. Another one. And now? How long did that one last?

This is recent. No, that was my rebound. Are you at a rebound as well? Yeah. Can you move the bottle they're requesting they see your boobs in the can? Just put it on the actual thing. No, no, no, no. I've got to say actually, a woman, you're a woman who has been training.

She always wears the boobs out. I'm my heart almost fucking dropped out. Marina's been training. She's been in loads of gym. She talks about quite a bit around the room. Marina makes it over. And she's lost lots of weight, but weirdly, zero weight from your boobs has gone down. No, there has been there has been a much bigger

yeah, those things are duct taped to a spinal cord right now I'm glad you're lower back, I'm glad you're lower back because I'm fine, I'm proportioned rights those who have the backgrounds, they're not proportioned rights I think you have, I've a admirer of your titties. We all are. I've always tried to make sure that people,

they're not the focus though. They're not. They're actually, they're almost like, you know, when you get a steak and then you look over in this mushrooms and onions. Yeah, I'm like, you know what I mean? I love those options here. Yeah, I like those.

They're things to go on. They're a pungent side servings to steak. They're they're they're actually perfectly round too. Right? Are they? What happens to you act like I enjoy them. What happens when they when you take them out of the harness? They they don't fall that far. Are you kidding me? No, I mean they may they're very heavy. Yep, heavy. Yeah, but they don't fall You go. They're very heavy. Yep, heavy. Yeah, but they don't fall that far. Now, is it a light switch or is it like a fade away?

No, not light switch. That's how I keep the young ones, they would have gone. I was with both young boyfriends for quite some time. They were pretty satisfied yesterday. Really? How young? The first one was 11 years younger and then the second gonna say 11 year old. I was like Jesus Christ He was a legend 11

The second one was like his fight story allegedly I had rings on second one was 13 at least no The second was 17 years younger than wow. Yes. How did you hold up with that? younger than you. Wow. Yes. How did you hold up with that? I'm at that age where that's exactly what I want. You're in your prime. I'm there. That's where women at my age were your sexual creatures. I around around 40. You're around 40. Wow. I won't say I'm fine with saying it, but I'm not gonna say why Marina doesn't look a day over 31 35 What did you say that you know what so funny is someone once I think of his Dean Edward was like no, I could see her age I could see it. I was like fucking Dean I thought she was gonna say Dan Adam. No, but it's like

No, but it's like Yeah, he was 17 years old with him. He now looks like his star and I fucking had it and I lost it shit Shit, I had a good one. I had a real gap. I got it. God damn it I cartoon a version of fat Albert. No, I fucking stink. I Stink I had a good one and I lit my brains going it was gonna be a fucking hoo to do is a do is a so the sex was every day yes every day wow I don't fucking every day why don't I fuck every day with the second one not the first one the first one was like a cooler situation gone wrong really there was no sex whatsoever really that's the only thing with me is that me and I got a date Thursday night

we finally got a baby said yeah sure okay. Okay. She's she's smoking. She's smoking hot. The baby Sarah. That's a problem. My wife. My wife is very fucking hot to me. Yeah, it don't. Yeah, she's hot and she's got. Why was a higher baby? She's like that. You know that anxiety. I didn't know it. Oh ladies. I didn't do it. I didn't do it. She did it. I got you this girl has no she's hot But she's a really nice girl, and it's not even here's the thing real nice kid don't you know better? No But I told Dawn I go hire somebody with a dead tooth I Was fucking I don't need this stuff. Yeah, dead to turns me on but anyways, we gotta we gotta

I tell you we got a we get a babysitter Thursday and we're going out on a date We're gonna start going on dates once twice a month and but I'm fucking nervous I'm nervous. I don't know. Do I finger-popper in a parking lot of a restaurant in a car? You animal like a gentleman Of course you got to put it in yeah, but I we got to spice it up. We have to fuck. Yes You got it. We do it. How about this? How about this? Here's the thing though It's Thursday night is the last show. I have the live tweeted How do we go to dinner and enjoy some food? Yeah, while you're banging no, I'm not doing that

No, I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it. Okay. Here's a bit. So no, I'm not So now we we go home. What if I go home? Here's a deal. Tell me, I'd like to get opinions from each of you. I'm thinking that we go, have dinner early. We'll go for a walk, maybe go somewhere romantic, make out a little bit, get a little feisty, go home, we release the babysitter.

And we, from the, from the, from the, from the, from the, from the hangover. We watch the last episode. We live tweet live tweet right I do my live tweeting and they're right when it's done I go we go in the bedroom and fucking bang I mean I feel like the way you're running out is to yeah Yeah, I thought it was about spontaneity it doesn't sound spontaneous yeah We know the 25 years we have a Two year old that's a lot of manufacturing Spawn maybe make some little great areas where it could happen in that schedule talk to a girl that bangs every day

I mean I'm all right. You see I could come in and Went to the moment hits you how about if I text you at that moment that you send me a video of your fuck you suck I just go fucking we're fucking yeah I would like it I would make me do it I'll tell you I have to turn the volume off of my phone because I'm running my way to bed yeah all right what what do you suggest I do love no no I was I don't know I have no idea but whatever you guys get into I mean I mean I mean wait until you get back to the house releasing the babies that are doing is how you do it anyway. So that's a baby that are there. That's illegal.

I should be fucking arrested. That sounds so exciting. You bang once a week. But with the babysitter, that's disgusting. You bang once a week. No, because she's there. The kids still up. That's weird.

You bang once a week. That's the problem. You bang once a week. I get weird around. Sometimes not. You know, I got a thing having a kid. No, it's different. Is that, you know, I come home to watch, she's in bed.

I wake up, she's up before me, the kids up, we go all day, I leave at night, I come home, she's in bed. And then I go on the road, it's hard, being like when you work as a guy, nine to five, you're home at six o'clock, you have dinner, you see the kids in my house, you see your girl moving.

Yeah, I've been thinking about the old kid. But the kid, oh good man. Oh, you have a kid man. I want to keep something alive, you know I mean I'm sick about to turn myself. I haven't you as whole jokes You shit if you're gonna have a kid I'm telling you about you'd be a fantastic dad Here's why you'd be a fantastic dad. Here's why you'd be a fantastic dad. You have a lot of information to download onto a human life. I think you'd be a fucking great dad. And it would actually, it would make you confront a lot of your own bulls.

Yeah, sure. That's what it did with me. It maybe confront my bulls shit. And it made me, I like that idea. You're responsible for the way you're gonna release something onto the world that has you in it. And you have the ability to make it go this way or that way. Not 100% though. Some of it's shit that's in that kid. But you have the ability to go be gentle and love or go be a fucking little giant. I had to find that. I had to know it even to talk to

Jess. I went to all this therapy. We don't have to go do it now. Is that why you so much? I'm on a show. No, no, no, I'm just a little tired. I got to find I'm fine. I'm just gonna get him to fucking piss you off. You get excited. Yeah, no, no, no, it's all as well. Dove and I always have these psychological conversations. Yeah, I like how I try to always try to figure something out. Why someone is just not? Yeah, why it doesn't work.

Why would you want to serve a person? I don't like anyone I've decided. Why? I don't understand that you're a fucking person. You're a nice person. You've always been a sweetheart. There's something you're doing that I don't know she's choosing the wrong picture I'm choosing I am I'm choosing the wrong

Comedian always something wrong with always yeah, yeah, there's always something that we have to if you if you if you reach a point as a No, sorry as a proper comedian. Yeah, if you reach a point where you go. Oh, you know what? I'm okay now then you're not a comedian anymore As a reality if you got got everything stored in your life, give up fucking comedy, because the best comedy comes out of resolution or the exploration of trying to resolve some kind of internal conflict. For me, best comedy is trying to laugh at the worst shit

in life, and if everything's good in your life, then you might as well give up comedy, because there's fucking nothing to talk about anymore. So the next album shouldn't be figured out. Yeah got it. Marina's figured it out. All the answers. Dang, dang, dang. So good. It'll be as opposed to for all girls. There was a nice guy that I was supposed to see and I just he was so nice.

It was like everything about him was perfect. That disgusted you. I wasn't attracted to him. That was the one thing. Statically or because he had everything sorted out. I think it was just, I think he goes to church too. Do you experience stability as a big boring? Yes. I do. Like when he talked to church too. Do you experience stability as big boring? Yes, I do. When he talked about his architect, and I was like, I told you this.

I was like, I don't know how I find this interesting. I know you mean, I used to experience somebody who was really stable as a bit boring as well. And so, I don't know how much this reflected with some shit. I got to work on how much of it was delivered just boring. Yeah, they could be just boring. I couldn't boring. I Think compatibility plays a big part in relationships. I have more love Somebody but I think you know the reason why I can hang on my wife for over a year is it was just compatible

My favorite love is not enough. I mean you gotta be compatible You gotta be compatible. I mean I you can actually learn to love somebody better. Yeah. You can't. I believe that. I believe you can, but you can't learn compatibility. No. You can't, no matter what you do.

I thought it was compatible with my rebound. You weren't. Yeah, you were compatible for now. For everything that was in common. Viction. Chicago, age. Attracted. Same love of music, but I don't know we never really talked so yeah Can't date somebody with a headshot. I can't fucking stress it enough. I love that

You can't Date I really do hang on a second hang on one second. Hello Matt Frost, you're on the YKWD live. On the radio. That's for us. Hang on one second buddy. Hang on, hang on. Where's the fucking cord? What's up? Are you in the company's hour store now? Am I, hang on one second, we'll put you through the board. Hello, you there? Good, talk, you there? Yeah, you there. You can hear everybody, right?

I believe it just worked. Hi, Matt. Can you hear me? Are you with the camera seller? Yeah, we're here. Yeah, upstairs at my podcast studio, you wanna come up? I'm, I'll come down right now.

All right, hit buzzer four, and then we'll let you in. Just come up to the second floor. Wait, hold on a second, I'm getting the cap. Hi, could I go to the flight, that? Hi, goodbye. This is, I don't mind. Radio goes. Can I go to the top? This is... Radio Goats. I don't like radio. Good bye.

Bobby. Buzzer 4. Don't tell me. That's fucking psychopath. Are you at a stellar? We did this. Yeah. Good bye.

Yeah, cut it off. Don't repeat the bit. Yeah, come on up. Are you at the comic tower? Yeah. God. Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Everything's gone wrong. Are you at the comments?

Yes, I'm here. Yes. Wow. All right. Goodbye. Wow. That was a good bit. Yeah. Good. Answering cool. So back to the head shot. Buddy, hang on. Stop really. Honestly, God. Everybody listening in the chatroom listening 10 years from now. I apologize What just happened I'm looking right in the camera now, and I know you know I mean it look at me I Fucking I'm sorry for whatever that fucking debacle I got the sound I thought there was gonna be some there was gonna be some golds in Matt Frost, right?

I mean he just came in nothing Wow, but I you Frost, right? I mean, he just came with nothing. Wow. But I, you know, I mean, that's why he's on the side of the business. Are you spiritually? Are you at the cellar or not? That's pretty good. It's a nice, just that's a question. Go to the chair, bro.

You can turn on the camera. Yeah, let's get to another one. Chris Brinkley just said, wow at so looking forward to Matt showing up Great Killa you're a killer. Oh god. That was a killer. Come in. I mean it'll make me fucking laugh You were from Jersey and this was all a fucking real front Yeah, he's from the second fucking pleasant. Yeah. I know. You know,

he's giving you a fuck if you know, I know you're from Jersey because I know guys like you. I'm you. You fuck. I am you. You fuck. Hey, you fucking. Come on. What else you got? Punisher says, Bobby, you got a periscope. The finger prop. Say someone's on my side with that one.

You're out of your mind. Get a lot of views, man. It's all sexy days. I wish periscope the creep, whatever you do. I think you should spice up that moment afterwards, at least. With what? Like, I don't know. Live chat.

That's why you got a periscope. I'll hurt a com with something, but not tell you what it is. What do you mean com with something? Like, maybe she could wear an outfit. I'll fit, you know what outfits do to me? You know what, the only time panties turn me on when they have my gizz in them, I can throw them on the wall and they can slide down like a slaughter.

I don't fucking care about how. Hashtag pants. Hashtag pants. I like a pair of panties. Like if you were in like men's tidy whiteies, that would turn me on. There you go. Did I just say that?

Let's talk about pants. Welcome to a walkie-you dog in a bar turn me on there you go. I just say that Well there you go Dude you're an old speaker. What are you talking about? That's actually pretty great. I don't listen tell me this look at me. Yeah, it's telling me I'm telling me rather than panties. I'd rather than woman in woman's song her if she took her panties over She was a little tidy whiteies. I'm not saying I wouldn't want it. I'm saying I prefer an actual painting right I like that you should make that after that after the whatever you're watching your last the last show hey Buddy, you know You know I expect the thousand dollars on this stuff

You can just send them to the link with live. Oh, okay. I was periscope You know at the thousand dollars on this stuff you can just send them to the link with live okay i was periscope you know you do it lying through periscope that's right people can like it um now do you have a fanbase in england yeah all right let's go on so back to uh yeah i do i it's not huge i mean it's like you know they're uh group of people i don't know like ten ten thousand people maybe give a shit about why you're doing england that's pretty good that's right yeah that's pretty good that's I don't know, like 10,000 people maybe give a shit about why you doing England. That's pretty good. That's pretty good.

That's great, man. Why is that? My mom talks about... My mom talks about the rules. What did you do over there? A lot of fucking... Oh, yeah, women do talk. I'm a very, very generous guy when...

Does not run. Now we're getting paid forever more. A lot of rounds. So, you know. Now we're getting this fucking thing going. It looks at me. So, let me ask you a question, Jeffy. What have you done?

Have you done any TV that we know of? Because you look familiar. You're American, so probably not. I did, you know what? I was on an American station called Current TV. You know, Al Gore's channel. I did some series on that. A little bit of head over here. And I did the voice of NBC Sports. I was on an American station called Current CV, you know, Al Gore's channel. I did some series on that, that head over here.

And I did the voice of NBC Sports. That was the thing I did. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? For the Premier League. Oh, how do it? You don't forget. Well, wait a minute.

I got really excited for a second. Yeah, all right. And then as they premierly, they're like, what's Premier League? It's not Premier League. It's not Premier League. It's not Premier League. Let's hear it.

It's not football. It's real football. It was the original football. Your football is, oh, let's do some things for 20 seconds and then stop for 10 minutes. Someone threw it in the gate right over another goal. It's a wet t-shirt competition. It's a load of fucking big guys playing a wet t-shirt competition. Fuck your sports. Yeah, fuck your sports. Baseball. What's that?

What if every seven minutes? What if that? Hey, Nacho's beer. Is that's that one? What if what if that? Hey, nachos beer What if NFL Longer than what if the NFL what if the NFL wanted you to Like to be there The voice of NFL I mean absolutely never do unless the money was great What if the money was just fucking insane? I do of course, so you'd be you change your tone No, I have no loyalty towards I don't care about any sport every when all my friends were collecting Merlin sticker books

What Merlin sticker books the football sticker books soccer sticker books, you know you get the players You do like baseball cards over here, right? You start hitting my new table with your rings When everyone was collecting those I was chasing them. Does that also go into the vagina? That's a good question. That's a good question. Let's give it another 40 minutes you'll find now. There's an over 40 minutes to get your pulse. That's too long. I'm hoping for it. Would you bang Jeff? I had considered it. I had thoughts. Until tonight. Why you bang Jeff? I had considered it. I had thoughts. So tonight? Why not?

So when you had considered it? Well, you know, after you break up with someone, you're just like... Yeah, you're just looking around. I'm at an age where I'm pretty much horny all the time. Yeah. So if I look at someone, I think, like Jeff is like sexually attractive. He's got a good little thing going on. Thanks for the validation. I like that. Thanks.

But then I got to know you. And I was like, he's a good little thing going. Thanks to the validation, I like that, thanks. But then I got to know you. You're a liar. And I was like, he's a good friend. OK. Really? So what was it about my personality that made me no longer a sexual conquest possibility? The eagle ring on your middle finger.

That would slice up at her fucking ovaries. Who's that what he wants? I just knew you were new here, and you were experiencing a lot and dating a lot of women And so I figured go ahead do you? I don't like that. There's what I don't like about Jeff You're a comic and you're all about alpha male. He literally is trying to take over my show I'm not with his periscope. I'm increasing look more viewers are tuning in how many how many I like eight so far

I get that off. So I've just thought, I've just doubled the view. It's come on. I'm the viewers. How many people in the chat? Oh, we have 40 people watching right now. We have more people watching live. All right, so I have 5%.

No, 10%. No, wait, 10%. 20%. You're English. Be better than that. 20%, yeah, my master is your wife. I'm not Asian, though. 20%. 20%. All right, there you go. Let's put it on dub for a bit. 20% your English can be better than 20% yeah my massive I'm not Asian though 20%

Let's put it on dub for a bit. Who would you who would you bang in this room if you could Jeff? I feel like I feel like I feel like DuPo is it DuPo? Deepo. Deepo. Sorry. Deepo. DuPo is actually cooler I think there's already a deep pack in this business. Deepu. Deepu would probably be in my choice because he is the... You're like dominating anything, guys. Is that what you're thinking?

Yeah, you just have like a video. You have a soft face and a nice mouth. Oh, thank you, buddy. What about the fuck? What is that? Look at him. Look at his face. He's got a five o'clock shadow at six in the morning.

I got to think about what I'm doing my life and I want to play video games this guy. He uses a PlayStation controller to talk on the chat room He's another level of geek that I feel like we can add each other on PSN network We can play ESO together. We can lie definitely he knows what I'm talking about Yeah, I don't know if I fuck you but I pre-changed He's not fucking I mean I want to brain fuck you That's not true

Russell brainer, he did that if it had to I'm really upset that she didn't pick me. Yeah, but I mean sex I'm friends with you Marina. I close that big. I'd pick you Marina sexually because you're a beautiful woman No, she's a beautiful one. It respects to that. She's a beautiful woman. I'm I Your time. I'm I Yeah, Marina's a guy for a 57 year old woman. She's very attractive. Okay, and No But I'm close here's the thing

Thank God for this podcast tonight for the both of you because if not you'd be sitting on a stairwell waiting for a fucking Louis Ami amie I would have first how you already went on. Yeah. Oh my god I was able to squeeze it in you never going on. No, no, I got out of it I said I don't want to go on the next show. Why and why do you just follow Luis? Yeah, I just but over Luis I mean, I don't I don't need to do a little spot right now. I love going up after famous people. Yeah, cuz it's the best Mind on right? It's the best time. It's just show me over the audiences like absolutely ready Forgiving. Yeah, and then you yeah, it's a great time I love it. I love it. But Have you ever seen anyone just ruin it? What do you mean like after celebrity has gone?

I have you seen anyone just like do bad? No one's really ever done But not any worse than they would do well depends on what the celebrity does like so We'll look you talk about Louis or Amy. They're coming into fucking probably do new stuff right? You know, well you talk about a guy who comes in just to level the place. Right. Like dice. Yeah, guy comes in.

That was the one night really. Just dice clay. Yeah. Yeah. Rich Vos was hosting. Yeah. Yeah. When tonight he's hosting.

He's hosting. No, he's not. It was the strangest they've ever seen. Did they lose a whole line? I am not lying. I was like, who's the host? They said, Rich Vos. I said, what are you talking about? And then Vos goes, how do you want me to bring you up? I am not lying. I was like who's the host? They said Ridge Voss I said what are you talking about?

And then Vos goes how do you want me to bring you up? I go, what do you want? I mean, well say Conan He goes I'm not gonna say that Why would he say Conan? Well, he he he has you just on Conan No, why wouldn't I said why wouldn't he? I ask him to do, you know, and then he was really shitting on the crowd. It was beautiful. Why is Fawcyn?

What is Fawcyn? Why would, I mean, what? I said, why are you hosting? What do you say? I do ask. He goes, I haven't hosted here in years. I don't, I don't know. I need to gas money. I got two dollars in college.

I got one kid going into Fawcyn's seventh grade. That's a good boy. I need my dollars in college. I got one kid going into fucking seven gray. I need my artis better. I've lost his hosting downstairs. He's crazy. He's talking about Jersey. I fucking tell you Jersey. I know. It's fucking great. Yeah, this is this clock. I go from England. It's fucking messing up. I'll fuck Marina right now. You're so good at voices. I'm not. I love artis. I you're so good at voices. I'm not I love already I know you Good key from inside please go ahead do we get their preach to us? Man I just want to say yeah, y'all got on the stamp

Key let me ask you a question. Welcome to the sure listen, I would love to have you on the world What's going on in Philly? I am being back to Philly for a long time You're not Why you fucking with me, honey? Why you fucking with me? Who the fuck is that? That's key That's key How dare you

That was like me doing a British accent No This one was a little bit worse Now we're even keep going That's cute. How dare you. How dare you. That was like me doing a British accent. No, no. This one was a little loose. Now we're even. Keep going. Ah. Ah. Ah.

Ah. Ah. Look at you. You ate people agree with her. Eat the rice. You can't do cake unless you beat them. That's good. Marina, you're absolutely.

I was so many alarms set on your phone. So many alarms. Marina, please. Or is this Chris again asking how to get in? I don't know. I think, hello. I'm set on your phone. So many alarms. Marina, please. Oh, is this Chris again asking how to get in? I don't know. I think hello. Who's this? What are you doing?

You're on YKW live, Jim Cerepricot. Are you shitting me at 11 o'clock at night? Yeah, we're doing a special English edition, with Jeff Leech, Doug David off. Marina Franklin, Deepu and the ass, as we call him. Can we go name-ins? Yeah. Oh, man.

What's up? What do you mean English? Jeff Leech, he's from England. From England? Yeah, so we're going to. I don't admit something. I thought you guys were doing fucking Spanish episodes every week. All right.

Wow, if I could give you the bomb band dinner, I would. Hey, can you hear us? can you hear us jim? i can hear someone that's me can you all right so what do you do? why are you up so late dude? i'm working everybody this is uh... of course um... the fucking man Jim Cepricot from a possible the uh... he's got his new show coming out October was

October 1st October 1st on ifc calledenders, starring some of our friends, Andrew Schultz and Chris DeStefano, starring in it and they're fucking hilarious. And this is, CERPICO wrote it, directed it, fucking everything, produced it, and it's fucking hilarious.

IFC is killing it. Congratulations. Marin, this, they got Norton Show coming out they just did the pile of four so what's up Jimbo, what's happening? Uh, not much, I just had a pitch that I wanted to run but I don't think it's the right time

Yeah, don't run it over here because I got a fucking three uh, people who are looking at me and are stealing it He'll bring it back in It could be like America's Got Talent This could be the perfect time for adventure Yeah, it could be the judges That's a great show called the pitch with Jim Cervico. Yeah, we have the we have Marina the fucking the black chick who has an attitude dove who's a fucking heron addict as a fucking past and then we have the English

cunt. I mean I am. I think it should be the black chick who's scared to have an attitude. Oh, all right. I like that All right, dude. I'll call you we're wrapping up in about five minutes. I'll call you back All right guys. Take care. I buy Jim sir. Congratulations. I love your coos. They really add to the show I think that was actually good Jim was good every That was like hang on one second I'll never do downward Hang on one second. I got the seller. You got the seller?

You got the seller? Don't ever do downward-hand. I got the seller. Okay, I'll put that in. Look, I look so much better. I got the seller. Check it out. We got to wrap this fuck up.

Oh, shit. Do you want us to pair us up? What happened? Whoa. I don't have a pair of scope. Guys, hang on one second, guys. I don't know. Does it not be mucony from the last time?

No, we always got it with the back up. I don't know. I think I hit, I literally hit up that four minutes ago apparently. I popped out right now. We're going to, you got it, right? Yeah, I'll just send it to the thing. We'll send it.

All right, so anyways, I'm going to jump in a cap. You're leaving. All right, let's go through this, man. Let's go through this. We want to, we want to get you right now, Doug, what do you got going on, man? This is coming out Thursday. This Thursday.

What are you doing? I'll be in Austin next month. I just got off the road and then next month We're in Austin cap city. Yeah, I fucking love that club. Yeah, I can't get it. I think I won't book me I don't know the book of it. I was making about me. Anyways, what do you got buddy? I'm gonna make it about me I'm a fucking piece of shit. You're you're where you're one of your cap city. Oh next month middle of the month sometime I product what's your Twitter handle? Just at my name. Dev David off. I thought David off and and with Thomas D.O. V D.O. V. What's your website with me?

D.O. V. Life dot com. I mean, I don't I don't you know I'm a shitty marketer, but yeah I'm trying to help you with that right now. Yeah, so as you do is just answer the questions Yeah, and then I'll push it just you get the right D. You're going to the right deal V comedian, all pop up. All right, brother. All right, guys. See you later, man. Good night, everybody. Good to meet you. Just go, folks. Hi, Doug. God bless everybody. Hi. Marina, what do you got, Baba? Um, if you go on Conan, you can see my set. Yeah. Congratulations. Fantastic set. Yes. Thank you. Um, and also, if you're a young white man, she's interested. Don't ruin my moment. Oh

Shit god, I love her. Fuck. I love you. I love you When you're in the bedroom, I just want you to bring your dick expectations down Conversation I had yeah that it was very nice. It's okay. It's okay. You got, Bubba, it's not big. We got a chill out. That's what she told me.

She was a small girl and I was a lot thinner. She's still memory, she's, she's like, I'm telling you. I was like shocked. Was she a version at the time? No, she's, ooh. That was a good one. I don't know. Stairs a version at the time? No, she's I Get a bum time. How's it a bum? I'm right. Give it to you. Is that a question? There's another thing that I have. Yes, what do you got baby? Um

In the I'm writing on a show called divorce on HBO. Oh wow So it starts I start on the writing room again in two weeks and when the show comes out it's with Thomas Hayton Church, right in Sarajasca Parker Molly Shannon Wow, she don't even start sharing I believe it'll be the winter season. It should be like January. I don't know exactly. I should know these things But yeah, I got it. It's called divorce divorce on HBO Wow, I'm gonna see you No, you didn't I'm very happy and don't please plug your awesome podcasts that you started. Oh, yes, and I have

That is so annoying for some reason. Well because can you get it out of my face? I can put it a you're tips if you love me I talked about your cock like that. It's so annoying That'd be great if I talked about your cock like that. It's so annoying So I it's very distracting it is distracting when someone's trying to talk and you're just going back and forth like a fan One of us I have five cameras. We're all set. I'm just making it about you More of an order you should keep it steady I just put on me. Yeah, but you should put it on you or keep it steady because you're making people throw up with the movement I mean you're're a bad editor.

You're a bad editor. You're a bad editor. I'll film a little bit. You're shitty producer. This is my whole moment became about you. Yeah, I do. I think not. I was trying to spread your moment to more people,

but that's okay. You don't want you could spread. You don't want you could spread. You know what you could spread? You should spread. Sifferless. You can make it on. These notes.

These notes. Beats notes. Never not funny. So that's it. Friends like us. Friends like us is a really good, and Robert is the reason that we are doing so well actually, because Robert helped me get it started. You are. Not me, I know that.

But you helped me. I helped you, but you did it. You did all of it. You featured in Essence Magazine this month. What? No, I'm kidding. You did all of it. You featured an essence magazine this time. What? No, I'm kidding. That's great. I'm very excited for you. That's a great show.

Make sure you check it out. Where can they find it? On iTunes and on Spotify. Spotify as well. Awesome. Jeff, what do you got, buddy? I got a show that's gonna be this Sunday at SoHo House. It's the private members show.

So yeah, you film me and I feel comfortable with it. And if you're spreading it to your viewers, I'm happy about Marina. Unfortunately, I know that you're just taking selfies to your own viewers. I'm not really taking it. I'm gonna be doing a show this Sunday. So it's the 20th of September at SoHo House.

It's a private gig. You can't get in with buying and any tickets, but we have got some exclusive guest list. We've got two sets of tickets, two pairs of tickets to give away on your podcast. If anyone listening, let's come and see you headline. I fucking love it. Link Copolis is opening Dave. He'll be performing to Keela Mockingbird, headed up by Colin Smith. It's gonna be playing as a live house band and myself hosting. If you want to come this Sunday, what you're going to do is email you guys and do you have a question? Email me at Scopo, what's your... I like AWD.

No, no, no, what's yours? I like AWD producer. Okay, why KW producer at ryecast.com? Email Scopo and he's going to get the information from you. It's your app. Two pairs of tickets, so do you want to do a question or something? I'm well. We can...

How do you want to do it? I would just give him out to the first... I would give it up to the first two people that email you they get plus one so they get a cut a pair of ticket So you're giving away four tickets when you wait for tickets the first two people to email him will get them plus one Is this gig on Sunday at so I was listening live wasn't a little bit of a cheat? Yeah, it's not good for them Because they're investing the show good for those people. Yeah, they're fucking listening That's great that they're actually these motherfuckers are here right now.

There you go. And if you didn't get them, then you're too late. It's coming up next day. You can see the show. And then outside of that, I'll be in this film, The Dog Wedding, which the dog wind comes out in Boston. It's, yeah, it's on actually September 21st at 7 p.m. That's a Monday at the AMC.

It's just a Wednesday, right? At the AMC. I'm playing a dog, Marini. Yeah. the at the AMC can I finish the fucking thing I mean you guys suck at radio literally the worst I mean the worst you literally never be on like how it's like hoping Anthony would fucking just throw

you off oh we would just be like you never have a mon again all right listen at the AMC the whole at Boston common all right so tell me twenty first seven PM Monday Jeff is actually the never have him on again. All right, listen. At the AMC, the whole is embossed in common. All right, September 21st, 7 p.m. Monday, Jeff is actually the voice of the dog, and Matt Bloom is on it, which is great. So the dog wedding.

The dog wedding. I'm also in Tinder and happen. I'm there pretty much. Where he's also a dog. No bumble. No bumble. I'm on the moon happening, Tinder. People, what do you got, Deepal? I've lost all right to give plugs after that

roast battle so people can you cut yourself some slack I'm surprised you're giving me any slack I was terrible that was an embarrassing experience you made bombing a new name it's called the deep who yeah that's what people are saying now I was a deep I do a deep who I do that deep who'd that crowd that's for that like you know why people gonna show up at gigs, you know what I mean? You can unfollow me on Twitter or to Deep-o. No, fuck you dude. Don't ever do that. You might do my website or not. Don't ever do that. Yeah sure, okay. So on Twitter I'm at Jeff Leach. I make funny vines as well at Jeff Leach.

Okay. Snapchat at Jeff Leach and then website Jeff Leach to come. Don't hate me because I actually have a social media presence Marina Franklin. Oh my God. You can see me on Marina Franklin's chest in about a week if I learn my standard. So you get deeper, listen here's a deal. I'm not sure, yeah. You did not bomb.

I just did look. Guys, guys, guys, all right, stop. You shit, would you? Stop it, you shit. All right, stop having cross conversations. I'm fucking talking to poor Deepo. Bomb fucking life out. My first time in the community was too podcast here.

The fucking guy you didn't bomb. You're a new guy, you did a roast. Alright and you wrote your jokes and you took a hit. That's it. Here's not only did you solidify yourself as a comic because you went on stage in front of all of us and put yourself on the line, you're bombed. You did, but who gives a fuck? Because you did it in front of us.

We actually go, there you go. You're a fucking comic. You got to bomb many times. Yeah, you're exactly. You didn't, you actually now- I put a lot of stake in it. That was the thing. I prepped like for a whole month, I was gonna be like I'm gonna fucking

My best part of comedy right? Yeah, but you can do a hundred amazing gigs Think you're suddenly the best thing on on the planet the earth and then you go and do a gig and you bum like a motherfucker And you go all right. That's one of comic cuz it's still happens sometimes. Yeah, dude I mean look I'm fine now, but for the first couple days after I was like yeah couldn't even get in a bend You shouldn't do and you a bum too, right? Next time call me. Why were you bummed? You won. Yeah, I don't know, just pretty bummed though.

Look man, you guys went up in front of her. You were taught because you won? You went up in front of a room full of water. The soy or winner. And did it. Most comics, some people who want comics, won't go on that line, won't put themselves out there. You guys both did.

You should fucking command yourself. You had me, Ari, Mark, no, I mean, there won't put themselves out there. You guys both did, you should fucking command yourself. You had me, Ari, Mark, no, I mean, there was a ton of comics there. You guys went on stage in front of a crowd, in front of comics, and tried to be funny, original. Here's where it's good. You weren't just doing your set, you had to write new stuff for that one thing

that you'll never use again. That's comedy. You know what I mean? So you actually learned a great thing that you can actually write jokes, people not funny ones, but you know, but now you can go back and say I'm going to write jokes for something. You're like a big boy. You took a lot of balls to do that. There's some comics. You're like, no, you did a really good job. You wrote jokes that were terrible jokes, but you did it.

I think you guys both did a good job. I mean, it wasn't the best thing ever, but you took a hit. We all had a lot of hits. Is there a video of it? It's on the stands YouTube page. I applaud both of you. This is the most important thing. It was was gonna be this supportive on this podcast. Yeah, I mean look I think you guys I was very happy with it. It was hilarious We had a lot of fun at your expense. Oh sure, and I think that's good. That's part of being a comic Mm-hmm. You're right. You can be the joke. What do you got? I got your dates. Yep, good This Sunday, you'll be the so House and then the 24 25 26 27 28

You're gonna be the just for the last Toronto. All right. I gotta say something about this If you're a fucking Toronto fan if you're a Canadian Canada fan and you live up there Or Buffalo Rochester wherever the fucker you need to go and buy tickets to this you need to let them because look man I need to sell tickets to the show just Just for lots, it's JFL 42. It's gonna be a good one. Which, yeah, I hope so. I mean, look, I hope so. And you can tell. I need you to, I need you to support, let's mad again.

I need you to support this, so make sure that you go and buy tickets. It's on my Twitter, it's on my website, JFL42, and it's coming up next week. So make sure you share. And whatever my social, you want to help my social media share it. Like it. Get it to other people. Tell your friends about it. What else I can tell everybody. Tober second, you're going to be the Hoboken Comedy Festival. Yep. And Hoboken. I don't have a place for it though.

So October 8th and 9th, you're going to be the Hoboken Comedy Festival. Yep. And Hoboken, I don't know, they don't have a place for it though. So, October 8th and 9th, you're gonna be the Improv and Fort Lordael. There we go. So check it out. Everything Rob and Kelly Rob and KellyLive.com, go there, you get my acting real, you got my dates, you got all the info on sex, drugs and rock and roll, you can go there, check out there, a Facebook, this week, actually, the day this comes out,

is tonight on our facts, I know football's on, I get it. Or as he calls it, fucking, fucking fat men throwing a gatorade on each other. Yeah, I agree with him this Thursday. Watch my show. Watch my, it's not real football. I don't think it's a good game this week. What game?

I'm gonna be doing the fancy football league instead. All right, there you go. With the code Kelly. Thank you very much, week. I'm gonna be doing the fancy football league instead. All right, there you go. With the code Kelly. Thank you very much, brother. I'm gonna say goodbye. All right. I wanna say. There you go, wait, we gotta take pictures.

We gotta take one picture. I have to be as long. All right guys, that's it. You guys are the best fans in the fucking world. Thanks for listening. Thanks for in the chat room. I fucking love you guys. You guys are awesome.

You come into the chat room all the time. You're funny, you're hilarious. Some of you are dicks, but we still love you. Make sure you check out theriacast.com. Thanks for listening to The You Know What Dude Podcast. Con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras desperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de Madrid, Amurcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros.

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