Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Mike Cannon, Colum Tyrrell, Rich Vos | O'Really

Episode Date: May 3, 2021

This week Mike Cannon, Colum Tyrrell and Rich Vos join Bobby and get into dual citizenship, mysterious packages, and the importance of golf to children! SUBSCRIBE TO YKWD https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly https://thelaughbutton.podlink.to/YKWD​ http://www.ykwdpodcast.com FOLLOW YKWD http://www.twitter.com/YKWDpodcast http://www.instagram.com/ykwdudepodcast http://www.facebook.com/YkwdPodcast FOLLOW ROBERT KELLY http://www.twitter.com/robertkelly http://www.instagram.com/robertkellylive http://www.facebook.com/robertkellylive New episodes arrive every Sunday via The Laugh Button For advertising opportunities email: [e-mail] Go Premium: https://www.patreon.com/robertkelly Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Buscas contenido gratis. I wanna be see. Pluto TV es el servicio de streaming gratuito con series como South Park o sensación de vivir. Descarga ya la aplicación en todos tus dispositivos. Pluto TV, ven a verlo sin pagar nunca. Old school back in the day, we're all starting before them all I'm key to the white key that you did This podcast is so fun and crazy, and there's no rules Shut up, you're ruining this We're the more abandoned, I'm sorry

It's a comedy podcast, this is an NPR That's the podcast done! Is there any better show? This the original original You know what dude Mike fucked up mush fucked up Well was supposed to Test fucking can it. It's too late I'm sorry, I forgot. Test fucking can it. It's too late.

We've been pushed. We were supposed to start the show on me. And then I kind of intro a little bit. And then I introduce you guys, and then we flap into the show. So we wouldn't have to impose, go in and edit that out. We just, we edit it. We edit on the fly

They call that's hilarious that you make your guest sit here for your opening Mark Marin riff Well, I it's only I mean it's a two-second riff. I don't I mean it's just a couple It's a couple hey, this is what we're gonna be talking about today We got column who just shut everything off and now we have some weird shit on the screen. Let's get AI Plus he's got a palette HDR. SC. He's got a new camera. He hasn't used You look great. You don't even have to do it column. Whatever you're doing You look fent you look fantastic. You look great. We have of course column who's fixing his shit now Hey, we don't do shit regular here There we go. Yeah, look at how much better that is. That's great. We have of course column who's fixing his shit now. Hey, we don't do shit regular here.

There we go. Look at how much better that is. That's great. It looks fantastic. No more Irish blotchy skin. I need a more dark shadows of the IRA. We got Mike Cannon, aka Gizrag is in the house That's his name a truck stops around the country Gizrag because he's he's the only fucking Man-Hor that has his own little rag that wipes you cock off and shine jahama when he's done That's right and the majority of it is hard and unable to absorb anything. Yeah, well, there we go. We just got demonetized in the first five minutes.

Let's talk about, sorry, Mike. Mush, mush is like, you got to, you got to stop talking about vaginas and jerking off in the first five minutes. You got to talk to us something else. Um, and here's what's up, fellas. How you guys doing? All right. Yeah.

Great. All right. See you guys next week. YKWD, thanks for adding, like the Irish always do. They add so much dush, everything they put themselves to. The other thing you guys are good for is drinking and boxing. Go ahead, what are you guys saying? I'm not even drinking, but I will say I completely forgot that this, even though mush has stayed on top of it.

So don't blame him for this. Him and Gabby have been great with the reminders, even drinking, but I will say I completely forgot that this show, even though mush has stayed on top of it. So don't blame him for this. Him and Gabby have been great with the reminders, but I totally forgot that we were doing the show and I took like a tremendous amount of weed at 830. So this show is a race. Oh, that's so good. I hope you'll fucking flip out in a couple minutes, right? 20 minutes?

Yeah, that's why I have my hood up like halfway. I'm like trying to stay warm and confident What I'm by looking like an idiot Fun of me so I just You're like a mall Santa except for Tim Dylan and that polo you fucking you're like a mall Santa except for Tim Dylan and that polo you fucking to wordy it's to wordy I'll be I'll turn on you too Listen buddy I'm with you I want you to act as Irish guy

but you were too wordy any time you go you're like you're already you're already fucking behind the battle you know I know I knew what I wanted to say. I just didn't have The budget to get it done All right, let's let's let's turn it around here sometimes on this show We wind up attacking each other because that's a comics deal right one throws out a stinker somebody see somebody looking like an idiot And they like to that's what we do. We just like to tell each other what's going on but last night

for I gotta ask you did you did either one of you watch the Oscars last night I watched it for about 10 minutes 15 minutes and I was like fuck this it was worse I thought it'd be like fun you know because I I'd hate it and I'd be like yeah this be something to talk about on my podcast And I was 15 minutes in I was like fuck this It was horrific. It was like math or something. I Forget who said it was somebody. I think it was the kid Donovan cryptaddy Do you follow him on on Twitter? He's fucking hilarious at dude Yeah, but he was talking about how insane it was to watch this event of all of these wealthy people step to a podium and

Tell you to stay inside and wear a mask. Well they're like in million dollar gowns, just sash- awarding each other for their performances that nobody watched. I had nobody watched any of this shit. I was trying to find people, I guess Joe Liszt and Sarah Tullamage watch it because they're film snobbs because they're trying to get in with Louis CK's fucking good sound. Oh you should have heard Fini talk editing with Louis at the cellar the other night. Kid was in his fucking glory. Oh really? You mean on a TikTok? Who's okay? I get some views on TikTok.

Dude, it's like get this guy off me. Fucking. Oh my god, columns on fire, columns on fire. Shit! Keep them in swingin' to that. He really is. This guy's, he's got a bag of chips hit. And all of a sudden, he thinks a bag of chips hit and all of a sudden he thinks

he can sit with Louis and talk film. He told Louis didn't like the graduate and Louis was flummoxed. Wow. Wow. I always called the story. I'm sure he tells it better, but yeah, I'm just jealous because he had a conversation with him and I always just lock up Well, that's because you're in at the seller. He has no other options. He's like I might as you just talk to Louis He's a pocket on stage here Yeah, it was it was weird because I I I tuned in and I tuned in for like I literally a second I think I saw Who's a Glenn Close dancing,

doing a booty dance, I believe. Shaking her, like some dude walked up, was like, yo, what you got, something like that. And she was just doing the, she turned her into fucking Cardi B. It's like, what are you doing? I mean, what are you doing? They said, and they said, you know, it was actually, it was a better diversity this year,

but we still have a long way to go. What are you talking about? You had one of our oldest, you know, old white lady, shaking her booty on fucking TV in a $20,000 fucking Chanel. I mean, what the fuck do you want? What do you want? The BET Awards?

I mean, that's fucking crazy. What else do you want? How funny would it be if Meryl Streep like accepted an award? And she's like, you know, I don't want to be all up in your videos, all up on your songs. Comes that bro. Well, look, it sucks because we finally got diverse and we finally made the

The ceremony you know for inclusive for everybody and there's a fucking virus and nobody watches and nobody cares about awards It's like we should have done this like six years ago or ten years ago You know when fucking Billy Crystal or somebody was, when it was at its peak, it was like, yeah. I mean, yeah. I don't know like, I don't, I didn't see any of the movies, obviously, but all of them look like they have a similar tone of just fucking bummer.

And it's like, why would you, like who is watching that during a year where everything is a bummer? It's like, how many more movies does Francis McDermott have to make with a pixie cut in a dirty face? It's like we get it, lady. You can, you don't wear makeup. You're great. We get it.

You can pass as a merchant marine. Yeah, get it. I'm sure she was great, Ned. She's good in everything, but you know, who cares? Yeah. Yeah. It was just, and she's good in everything, but you know who cares? Yeah. Yeah. I was just down. I watched it for 10 minutes. It was a town.

And then they had this new thing where they used to just say like, the nominees are X, Y and Z and everyone would do like a plot each time. But then they would, the hosts like stopped and when said, Hey, Eric, I want you to know this. They gave it like a little monologue after each one. So it was even longer as she was like, just like, remember, when we met 10 years ago, you're so fierce and so, you know, it's like, it's all just like common in each other's face. It's like, shut the fuck up. You're just saying words.

Well, and they're acting as though they're empowering each other when they are already the powerful It's like nobody cares about your heroic story you fucking millionaire But you know, we're trying to pick ourselves up. We don't need to see you covered in jewels being like and I am so strong It's like yeah, give me It's hilarious. It's hilarious, but here's another thing they took out of it. And they took the entertainment me and Mushu talking about this. They literally took the entertainment out of the whole night. They took comedy. There's no comedy. I don't know. I kind of like Harrison Ford being clueless in front of a camera and literally looking into different corners of the room of where he's supposed to deliver it.

Yeah, I'm so sorry. Was it? So Thicca, I wish he would act like Han Solo for once in his fucking life. Stop acting like that. What? Huh? Fucking asshole. Alright.

Alright, wearing a right ear earring, you dipshit. He really bugs me. It bugs me. He's fucking hearing. Bald bothers me to no end. I saw it. I saw it when they did something with David Blaine at his house and he was in his kitchen. Yes. He did a magic trick and he was like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, Yeah, you shit together, Indie.

Stupid hearing house. You're a fucking dad to a lot of guys like me who never had a dad. It's left ear there. Yeah, that really stinks. I guess that's his like, that's how he shows that he's just a fucking maverick and it's not even a i mean what is that airing represent what is here's a thing i'll

give you the stats you ready for stats this is fucking nuts all right the uh... it's at all time low for holly Hollywood's biggest night. In fact, it dropped 58% in terms of audience from what previous low of the 2020s February 9th last year. In terms of key demo, the 21 Oscars is down to crushing 64% in early ratings. Dude, that is a canceled show. And I mean, you are fucking canceled. Well, I think America knows not to take it seriously once timing wasn't nominated.

Dude, can we go all over the... I mean, we went over last week, but the list of fucking movies, you're absolutely right. There was no fun movie. There was no end game. There was no fucking Dude, Seoul was the best movie of the year. Seoul was actually uplifting. It was deep. It had all these like different kind of messages. It was funny. The music was great and it won for best animated But it's like toss it in with the other ones. Why not? Like what else? How many how many more fucking cinematic talking to's do we need as a society? It's disgusting. It really is fucking disgusting. It's nuts. We don't watch movies to get a talking to. I get a talking to every day. We want a daily show. Fucking cardboard down the fuck. Are you talking? I'll fucking sit over here. I could be over here Let you weed kick in let me know when you want to fucking jump in

Fucking other shedrules are you wearing those headphones to look like a fucking DJ and Belgium or you Honestly, I'm keeping them on because my ears are comfortable I honestly am keeping them on because my ears are comfortable I'm fucking believe it is yeah, it's it's kind of sad I think I used to I remember going my acting teacher back in Boston We throw a party and they do a football fucking thing It would all pick and people would mid-money and it was a blast and it was funny and you'd wait the opening and it was a blast and it was funny and you'd wait the opening fucking the opening monologue opening number would be this fantastic entertaining holy shit funny piece and then they get into it and the host was great and he was a host and you know and then they just now it's I don't

you know what the fuck they're doing I don't understand what the fuck. They don't want to offend anybody. They want people. Everybody to feel good. And you make everybody feel like shit. Do you know what it is? We're not entertained. Yeah. The ISO maybe won't have two awards, but they both stopped and were just like,

listen, this is a great achievement for everyone, but a lot of kids are getting shot in the head by cops. And you're like, oh. Man, I know. I know. I just want to, I want to, I want to, I want to watch my animation or something. Fucking man. Yeah. It's, it's fucking, what it, no, she couldn't bobby.

I don't understand this. Anyways, Glenn Close. What does this guy say? And anyways, yeah, it was hot. And what was that Michael Douglas movie? She was in where she like cut a wrist and the tub or something, but she was fucking like the whole She boiled the fucking rabbit on his stove Dude, can I tell a weird thing that just happened? We just got the security

Hey, you want to fucking know the name of the movie? You just asked for I mean You want to fucking know the name of the movie you just asked for You just You're fucking train a thorn But the trade the trade the thought is relevant I hope it's not bad. It's so funny if it had nothing to do with like a rabbit. You said she boiled the rabbit right so Well, I was about to say you asked me what's the name of the movie and I was the boy that I was gonna tell you the movie And then you went off and some other fucking Fucking me. This is gonna be fun

So we just got ring footage somebody somebody put a bag with a the fucking fucking meat and this is going to be stuck. So we just got ring footage. Somebody, somebody put a bag with a sealed box that said perishable on the hook of my mailbox out front. So I'm thinking like, what the fuck is that? We didn't see who it was. We just pulled the, my father-in-law pulled the package inside and he opened it with a knife and it's a dead squirrel.

So somebody intentionally boxed and sealed and labeled perishable on a box and hung it up on my mailbox. You're welcome. Yeah dude that's not even funny. That's that's that would scare the shit out of me. I'd go to bed with my shotgun like next to me. I'm I was nervous, but we saw the that's like an old Irish thing like the dead rabbits, you know, it's a dead squirrel It's a Westchester or wherever you live. Yeah, thinking of seeing of dead squirrels Well, I just want to let you know my my Canon took Edibles a lot of weed around 20 minutes ago. So it's kicking in. Yeah, he's doing it more than my typical podcast does to this.

He really knows how to eat it. If it's not on stage. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Yeah, yeah, I'm trying to forget reality as best as possible. Bobby Hootie, it's just a bringer podcast and Mike bring that other guy like Hootie, what kind of fucking, what's going on here? Why am I doing this? I fucking hate him. I said, I said Vos, he can have the lick anytime. He has compa, just to come in whatever he wants. And he came in, but here's the thing, that's Column.

He's a very funny comic. Yeah. He's from Ireland. He's got a little broke. And he's very funny. As a gun boss, we did the same show together a few months ago. Who did?

The four of us. No, no. Hoss was none of it. Oh, we lost it. It was one of those other old guys we can't find out with a name of. A lot of people say old or a lot of new guys like you should see experience, but that's okay. Will you do in comedy in Ireland? Do you do it in Ireland? Yeah, I did, yeah, and did you open for des in Ireland or you just

No, I didn't actually know that was kind of gone when I was there But he was a big fucking act there right? Yeah, you lost your mic isn't on yet again We're a year and a half into a pandemic. What's the news still? We had a laptop like he doesn't know how to turn his mic on when he does a podcast talking about my mic's not on go choose what are you looking for over there it's not over there it's right my plug didn't it's plugged in it's just there and on all you haven't picked it you have to pick it in the things see what says audio mush can you please help him? Now he's broke. I don't know what he's doing.

He's broke. Now he froze. Nope. It's not on Vos. I mean, I know what the time he said he's going to go to camp Mike. I can. What am I doing?

I wonder why my rating is still. I'm going to call you a real quick. This is like in and tough on tough crowd. Who's like my wife's grandmother using Facebook? Like being it's my I should it's like older crowd Fucking a what were we talking about the Oscars? Oh you went off on a tangent You asked me the name of the movie based it wasn't basing it now you got me all fucked up I was that movie called now I forgot it no the most important part was does that dead squirrel in the bag

On his desk grow on the back. That's what we got to It was addressed to me and it's just them doing it so we'd leave doing it so we'd leave. I apologize for snapping it. That's a very fucked up story that you have. You had a dead squirrel. You're not concerned about that at all. No, because I just saw the footage and it's some dipshit in a Nissan Centra

that looks like just a fucking frumpy S suburb in the night. Yeah, but dude, can I just say something? What? People, somebody boxing a dead animal, killing an animal, or picking up a dead animal that was killed, and putting it in a box and writing of parishes on it, and then hanging it from a family's front door, and leaving is crazy.

Wait, who's hanging from the door? Who's hanging from the mailbox? But Bob, I can't stress enough how ready I am to take a life. Yeah, listen, if you're on the wrong side, they take in a life as like one of the best things. Yeah, I hope. I wish a motherfucker would. I want that fucking bowling pin of a suburban failure in their dog shit centra to fucking roll down this driveway. So I can point an actual AR 15 right up their nose.

Voss, can I just get some work? I slate that. Maybe you can maybe cut the whole. What's that? Can I? So just to get you up to date, we were talking about the Oscars. We moved on to Mike Cannon has a ring video of a guy putting the box on his mailbox. They opened it.

It said perishables on the box. And he opened it. And it was a dead squirrel. Yeah, I heard that yeah Is that a normal thing in Jersey and your name? Was that a welcome in your neighborhood In columns neighborhood that would actually be lunch Welcome to the neighborhood. He has a squirrel for lunch put into the stew.

But like is it Mike? Was it did you pitch somebody off or I don't know man. I'm pretty edgy, you know? Here is a bowling ball Fucking the godfather So You found a squirrel like was it squirrel head or the whole squirrel the whole squirrel Yeah, it was How was it killed? It was it actually. I didn't, I looked in and so I was like,

is that a fucking animal? And my father loves like, yeah, it's a dead squirrel. Like what? He's like, I don't know, man. I think it might be PETA. I think they know I'm a hunter. Like they might be saying something. I'm like, what are you doing? PETA, you think PETA would kill an animal?

Just hold that to see somebody eless? Maybe. Who's a hunter? My father love. He's a hunter for a new son-in-law. What's he hunt? What's he hunt? I like it better when your mic was off. Shut up. Shut up. The comics are talking, Bobby. What's he on? Oh, he hunts like deer big gay like stuff like that. I mean, it doesn't go to every all those shapes. Yeah, hippo.

Yeah, I know. Yeah. He owns a party. I don't know fucking bucks and elk and bison and shit. I don't know. I'm not a man. I just know he comes home sometimes with bags of meat And then some of the bison. There's no way he hunts bison. Yeah, why not? I just know I just don't think he'd hide first of all bison is very hard to hunt

And you they don't have you got to get on a horse you you gotta ride it alongside it shoot it in the fucking head Why they made it they made that a rule We'll do it how you gonna get a bison bison you know can just run up to a bison they they fucking fly No, you take a 50-cal sniper rifle and lay up on the hills and watch them graze and just pick them off. Oh, that's real hunting You really are a fucking I I bet you put the box in the front. I bet if you're replaying the footage, you're chewing that dumb hoodie. Yeah, we're several hoodies.

My hips are huge. I wouldn't keep stealing animals. And then just fucking back and out. And then I go into a few state and just murder small animals. There's a sharpie on your wrist, explain what you did. They might that your wife do edibles too? Very minimally, not like me. So you're doing it by yourself, like at home,

I mean not at home, at their home, and just hanging out doing edible. And like, how many do you take, like, do you take enough to get so fucking wasted or just to get through this podcast? What do you think we do? Plus, no, I don't so fucking waste it. No, I mean, every, you know, I'll, uh, I'll kind of drift in and out of focus, but in terms of being wasted. I'm not wasted. Well, I mean, when I smoke, I didn't, I'm gonna put the pencil down, boss, or I'm gonna fucking kill you. Put the pencil down. I'm gonna fucking kill you.

Well, they didn't really have the post when we were getting high, did they? No, they didn't have, we had a bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, bad, dishes. He's gonna make his mother-in-law tea. He has a real bad feet before bed. Where is Michael? My tea is not ready. Does he want another dead squirrel on that porch? I if I found a dead Emma be fucking I'd fucking I'd lose my shit. That's a warning That's a fucking warning. Yeah, that's from witches man. That's like a fucking witch warning Right, I mean, do the column right? It was a prank was it? I was at a prank. How's murdering an animal? Funny I was a fucking funny prank. Are you kidding me? That's hilarious if I did that to you that would be the funniest thing

Are you kidding me? If I put a dead animal on your on your porch Now it would be if you did it this week it would be hilarious because of what happened to cannon But if you did it and I didn't know as you like a week ago, I'd fucking lose my mind. Yeah, but first of all, why is Canon opening a box that has not come through the post office? Because he's lonely and depressed. You know, if someone was this first fan mail, it was. If someone just put a box on your, I mean, you got to think before you open it,

if you don't see like stamps and a return address and all that, what the fuck? You know, you would not open a box if you found a box and your front step. I don't know what I'd have to look at. I have to examine it. And if I didn't trust it, I would have my wife open it. What do you think marriages for? I didn't trust it out. I would have my wife open it.

What do you think marriage is for? I knew in a studio with all the eight cartons and stuff for the phone. Me? No, no, no. Now all this shit. No, yeah. It looks like a studio, right? No, it's just a room in my apartment. Oh, it looks like a podcast studio.

I'm going for it's like a smoking mirror style thing. Oh, it looks like a podcast studio. I'm going for it's like a smoking Maristile thing Oh, and and how long have you been in the States working six years? Oh, yeah, yeah, and you work at the seller, right? No, no, I don't Do you work in New York? Yeah, I work the stand mostly who doesn't Do you? Yeah, I'm rich for us bitch. I work wherever I want. But yeah, I work to stand. Hey, what the fuck? Hey, when you're uncomfortable conversation, I'm not saying him up for some smashing. No, I'm not saying I'm up.

I'm not about to. Will you do and stand up in Ireland before you came here? You already asked him that question. He said six years. No six years here. He's been here. Oh six years here. Sorry. I'm old.

But I was doing. Yes, you did ask me this already. I did. Yeah, he did. Okay, so I'm right. And I think you were setting something up earlier and it didn't go. No. No, because you brought up there as Bishop and you were disappointed. Yeah, I said it

I would just see how big desert listen. I want to work Ireland so bad so I can go play golf I don't you know, I don't know I just want to work in Ireland, but I can't go over there to play golf without work And I can't stand my wife. Hey, I'm leaving to go play golf in Ireland I like to make money while I'm there. Do you only book gigs so you can play golf now? Is that where you're at? No, no, no.

But if I'm going to go, no, look, I'm going to Tampa. I'll probably bring my clubs. It depends who I'm working. You know, if I drive there, my clubs are in the car anyhow. So, you know, but I want to go to Ireland and go. My friend, and it's fucking one of the best places in the world to play golf. So I want to go there, but I want to make money too. Rich, we got to play

together. Well, I couldn't think of anything worse. I'll send you the details of the main guy who runs all the festivals after this, if you want it. Oh, okay. Oh, good. I'm glad you got the book, boss. Can we move on to fucking something interesting other than you trying to fucking go to Ireland and play golf? Well, we're talking about Ireland. He's from Ireland. What are you two that you two selfish to?

Less from Ireland originally. I was originally from Ireland. My whole family is from Ireland. I've been to Ireland. I played Gaelic football for a long time. Yeah, but my whole family is from Ireland. I could get I could probably get a dual citizenship. Con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca. Espectacularismos, monumentos, rinincones de película y un sincín de aventuras te esperan.

¡Fliparás! Huelades de Madrid, Murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea Tarifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en of my grandmother. Great. What? Really? Yeah, really. What? What? You don't believe? Really? Really? Oh, really? Really.

Really? The fucking Donlin, Donlin, D-O-N-L-O-N. Who are slaves? What county? You were slaves. Fucking, we were slave. What county? Magruba. Magruba? What county you were slay fucking we were slay what county?

My my my group is a grouper like the movie Grover it's similar to the movie Have you ever been to not Ireland? Have you ever been there Bobby to visit your family? I'm going there. I just got booked there on a tour Starting in September. I'm going from September to Actually Christmas all over Ireland Scotland and then I go to the UK. What are you getting mad for? Why are you going away for fucking four months? No one's at... I'm not going for four months. I'm sorry, I said September. I'm sorry, September is I'm sorry September. It's November to December. Sorry. Oh

Have fun Thanks buddy. I'll let you know the golfing is you need an opener Huh, I do do you want to go? Yeah? Yeah, that's great. I mean open open. I don't care I'm not an old Liz Voss first of all listen to me, your jokes on column and Mike don't work on me, okay? I am an headliner. Okay? Oh my God, almost spit water all over my computer.

What up? Listen. What? Have you ever worked your up before? I've only worked, uh, I've only worked, uh, Amsterdam. And, yeah, no, and that's it. You never worked, uh, Scotland or England? No, never did this thing.

Scotland's weird because Scotland, they act like they're at a fucking play. Like, it's not like some loud loud laughter but at the end they're like oh we at least at the festival when I was at Edinburgh it was so weird uh... england drunks can I ask a question about Edinburgh did you do a month like an hour ago no no i just went and did a couple a couple nights in that bro yeah

but this guy, Lewis, she was running shows, this is years ago, and I think me and Patrice went for like a couple of days. I remember that. I remember that, I hear it when you've been Patrice went over, how was it with him? With who, Patrice? Yeah.

I mean, I worked, Holland with Patrice, we had so much fun. I don't remember a... scottl i remember bring my clubs and going to play public courses in scottland but and the shows were real small like he had a small theater louis uh... shaper and it was uneventful because i wasn't doing like three weeks or two weeks here

just going to for a of days was uneventful. I went, you know, do some tours at Broke Assault and stuff, you know, but whatever, you know, it was a little bit more. That Lewis guy is still there. He's still in England. Do you know Lewis Schaefer? You know Lewis Schaefer was the guy

who made Boston Comedy Club actually successful. And then he went over to the seller hired him to work the front door at the seller and to drag people in. And he was the one who started getting people in at the seller. He was barking out front. He was like, he was probably the best barker ever. He was, he, I want to his house, huh? He was even better than Bobbi. Yeah, he was that he, he, he was out of Louis on his wall.

He has, he had, uh, he wore a blue sports jacket, jeans and a dress shirt every night. And I went to his house once we had to like pick him up and we went in and he had For the same outfits in a closet. That's all he owned with that outfit It was like a uniform and he had a glitter box in the fucking closet. It was a grossest shit. I've ever seen in my life We're talking now. He was great. He was great though. I mean Louis is not gay not gay was the bus didn Boston busier than the seller at some point? Yeah. Yes. Fuck yeah. Yeah. It was awesome. It was great. It was great. I mean, some of the biggest acts were going

at Boston, Chappelle, fucking Red Johnny and the round guy, Brewer. Yeah. You know, I mean, fucking powerful fucking killer lineups, man. Did anyone see Barry Katz posted Chappelle sign-in sheet on Instagram from like 1992? So I guess what happened was every time you played it you had your own sheet and you'd sign in and then at the end of the week of the month Work out your totals was All right, I don't Literally could I just say something column. You have two guys that were literally there when all of it was going around. We were welcome to tell you how everything works.

And then you jumped in. You jumped in with didn't I didn't batting cats have a line up with a photo of Dave Shipette. Shut up. Why don't you and can't argue? Why don't you and can't argue who's oh? What are we gonna do another fucking episode of remember when we were born? What else you don't tell us about roasting at the seller?

That we don't talk about for treats again. No, we're not Maybe you old fox We're in trutus It's all we have column that's all we fucking have They're basically both wearing their comedy letterman jackets right now Well, you should have a little more respect a young buck You know, it just happened that's like when what his name? When Richard Prior was on a talk show with that fucking old for comic, what's his name? And Richard was just laughing at him because he was telling a story

and it was taken too long. And Richard was fucking stone and he just cracked it up. He was like, I'm so sorry. And then he was like, you know what? You should take, take your shots, kid. And he was like, okay, pick my shots. He's fucking embarrassed. That's what you just have more column.

Column, I hope you fucking die. I really do. How do I do? Don't ask that. Let me open for you. Let me open for you and you'll see me die. And no, the point was, is that the pay in 1992 is like more than the clubs are paying now.

No to you. Oh yeah. No one is a pay. It was like 120 bucks. First bus for the for the small club at Ed Boston. How many of the Boston seat? Four. The Boston that's a good question. I don't fucking know man it's that it probably sat pack 80 to 80 people probably 80 people packed you know but it didn't pay a hundred and quarter of spot back then you know I don't remember the weekends

but it didn't pay you know it definitely didn't pay that during a week. Barry was not paying $100 a spot during the week, believe me. You know, I know who the fuck knows who cares. The WUGIN 20 WUGIN 20 dollars a spot. You just got to rich, he just bummed about. He got in bed and gave nothing goes who cares. I have 20 dollars, I got 20 to fucking him. I got 20 to hose a spot and I was happy.

I remember taking a cab home, being like, oh my god, I got to take a cab. But I didn't have to wait at the fucking train stop for an hour sweating my nuts off. And I jumped in a cab. I got 20 bucks from Missavia. Remember Missavia? Yes, it's a train station, not the train stop. wedding my nuts off and I jumped in a cab. I got 20 bucks from Mesovia. Remember Mesovia? Yes, it's a train station, not to train stop.

You're fucking stupid. To train. To stop. At least it's a train. It's a bus for you. I can't go to the train stop. This is just a cluster of fuck. Why did I invite you?

Why did I just give you the link? Why? We have a great time talking about dead squirrels and the fuck and you piss off one of the young bucks and he turned on us. I don't care I don't care buddy. My can is so high. He's just been laughing for the last eight minutes and everything. I know. Watch this this Mike I mean honestly that was funny your face is animated good Shit Okay Got the huh Bring up some topics I have that I did bring up a fucking top. Yeah, like when you say about the Oscars

When you say that's the prior flip I Said you got it. Oh this this clip was fucking great watch this clip. This was just happened on this podcast. Oh Millenboro, no bird. That's who was that's rich and me put together put together. I'm sorry, man, but just, I'm just dead. We rewinded it again. We rewinded it. Here what he said. I wish Richard got back.

I had no wish. He goes ahead. Go back. Just, uh, go back. Go back. Go back. Go back. I'm sorry.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. He's talking about to get the joke. He has to give the first consent or two. That's too far. Not happening.

I haven't abortion. I'm sorry, man, but just have a... He's talking about having an abortion. I wish. I wish Richard that I could have laughed at that time at your age when I was your age, the way you just laughed now. But I just couldn't. I told you this nine years ago. I'm telling you I'm the air for a million people.

Pick your spots baby. All right, sweetie. Union the business yeah like it's cock it. We just got we just got we just got picked your spot by fucking now column I don't like it No, you made me feel like a fucking bag but I was engaged in I'm trying to monetize this YouTube page back up I'm monetized as YouTube page back up You just call me a bag like oh no, no, he's not he didn't have FAT. Oh, sorry It's the accent the sounds like it's okay. Okay, good

No, I said I said the fucking thing You said the fucking thing. You said the fucking thing, all right? The miscommunication right now between everybody is really fun to watch. I was, there is zero chemistry. I know. There's more chemistry in history class. I wish right now your in laws would throw you out. You and your debts, your world. I wish right now your in laws will throw you out You and your debts squirrel

Just me with the squirrel on my wrist petting it how's your kid? He's awesome, man. He just woke up. I think I won nightmare. He's gonna be two in July But he's all he's like super into sports. We take a take him to play soccer and basketball and shit. I just filmed a video with me crossing him over Because I'm you know, I'm gonna hang on to that for as long as possible All right, we're me crossing him over like I'm basketball like I make him fall I I shake the shit out of my son on the basketball court and I will continue to do that until I'm unable He's three. He's not yet. No, he's not yet, too three. He's not yet. No, he's not yet too. He's too. Okay. Well, go check. Get him to play golf. He's not going to be, he's not

going to make it shareable. You know that. You got him to play golf young. And let me tell you some worst advice I've ever heard of my life really is. Hey, get you basketball. If he doesn't make it, at least he gets the lessons of teamwork and leaders. He makes friends at a park. He's in the park with a set of clubs you fucking moral. Play us all those sports and stew in your own brain for four hours. You're seven year old.

First of all, you meet so many people on the golf course you fucking... No, no, no, no, up. Let's go play through. It's a great opportunity for eight year olds to network. By cell on the fucking fourth hole. 19th. We can play sports in school, Canyon. Did you play basketball? Yeah, I mean, honestly, I wish that I'm trying to make a case for there should be like professional, there should be professional leagues for children because I would have been a professional child athlete. I was very good at sports

when I was a kid. We all were good in sports. What do you kiddin? No, we weren't. No, we were not. I tell you, I guarantee two of us were two, maybe two, maybe he was good at cricket, but I'll tell you what I do. I'm fucking I was sports. What did you play? What did you play? Because I picture you with like like shorts and shorts shorts over it. Like just prancing in the outfield. I played I played baseball.

I played second base. And did you start? Did you stop playing? We'll say I allow blacks in? That was pretty funny. Yeah That happened after he retired anyway. Hey column column is cricket an Irish sport It is that's why that was actually very funny. It's like isn't it? It's not an Irish sport, right England play it and yeah Yeah, you guys couldn't Irish sport, right? England play it and yeah.

Yeah, you guys couldn't afford sticks, right? No, hurling is Irish and that's fucking crazy. That's like rolling up. It's rolling. Those fucking drunks after the night of the club. Fuck them and fuck their dumb pubs. Both of my wives were Irish because I went low budget. I couldn't afford a huge yard.

And that's why they're fucking Irish. And my second wife was fucking six pack, fucking no bodies. Listen to me, I played, I was really good in basketball. So I played second base. You're four, you're four 11. How are you good in basketball? Yeah, and speaking of your width, let me tell you something. Fuck.

Yes. Right. Yes. Yeah. You couldn't even hold the fucking ball. Yeah. I got it. Well, that's what I'm thinking. Did you like Simon Birch the basketball like how did you grip it? Vos Vos played when you underhand your

He had a belt on Rick Barry Vos Vos were about I was Sports where I grew up. That's what we did every fucking day. If it wasn't worse advice I've ever heard for any, I've been a parent for almost eight years. The worst of all is it, do you got to get them to play golf early? I'm telling you get them.

That's what I'm trying to do. Do you think Mike's kid is going to get a scholarship in college playing basketball? Look at his scholarship doing anything, not even art. Okay, he's probably not going to go to college. He's probably going to start in a trade. Where he's still going to live in that, he's probably going to live in that house

under that painting most of his life. He's probably going to live in that house under that painting, most of his life. He's probably going to live in that house under that painting, most of his life. I bet it was just kid to put that dead squirrel on the fucking mailbox He did have bloody hands Yeah Because we're on we don't gonna know Have a little psychopath

Psychopath. God damn right. I found out. I'm gonna do like that. Denzel. Yeah, I mean, that's like, you know, yeah, if I want to be like tiger woods his father and just obsessively create a maniac that can only come when he's half a sleep with a belt around his neck. It's like you can only fuck my chest and nylon's on to everything. You can only fuck my two nylon's on two of your wings. My daughters played basketball. My one daughter was second team all state in high school. Both of my older daughters were

fucking amazing ball players. I was out there all the time playing ball with a teacher in a ball. You know, but once they got to college, they can't compete with those. Those girls could have to stop with those those girls could stop you I have to I have to stop you. I have to stop you You are not teaching you you were not teaching your daughters basketball

There's no way that a little man a little Jewish man from Boss that's your costume from Greece. Bonnie made that. That was the rehabs production of Greece. Greece is what I'm gonna be putting on your Heine as I enter your fucking. This is the shit show. I really wanted to have topics. I really wanted to have good deep conversations about society The Oscars and all kinds of stuff and it just went downhill

Fucking Lou Holtz over here with his kid. This was a while ago, though. I got another one coming up where we filmed it at this park, but now we can move around. He's like dribbling on his. Yeah, that's great. Wow. Look at that hand on what a cute little guy. I've got a little spot. Still got a little spring in my step too. Yeah, let's go. Just give the kid... Just frustrate the kid all day long at the park.

That's good. That's a good, really. He's like got an innate ability for soccer. For some reason, he's just got a really good touch. He can run and keep contact with the ball. He changes directions. He kicks it into the net. He's like, it's fucking sick.

It's funny. Someone did just bring up up a how much golf did your kids play? So that was your main advice to all of us My kid my daughter my daughter kills a golf wall. You kidding me my kids played golf. I took him when they were young We started a picture what Your advice was get him to play young and then they'll be successful No, they'll get which one of your dollars is on the PGA tour listen to listen listen to me Fucking go to put the put the pencil down and don't fucking get mad. Just put the pencil down. Let me explain something to you You know what pick the pencil up. I don't want to see the hands

I'm just saying to get a scholarship. Yes, you get one in college for golf and it's in basketball. That's all. Especially, isn't it? There's probably a sport easier than golf then, too. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah, like fucking field hockey.

You could also make a lot of money and just buy your way in on the rowing team. If you can. Oh, yeah. Oh, that. I'm just going to invest in dogecoin and, you know, teach my kid to read Reddit, figure out the figure out the stock. Yeah. When you got the ad lib skills of a fucking a fucking holy Jesus Christ. Hey, you know the UFC has bad matchups? This is a bad matchup. No, it's good.

I love going to a cannon. I love to. What about Columns? I like Colum too. No, I can't understand. Columns have been here for like eight or nine years. How long does it take to lose the action or is that your gimmick? Whoa.

Wow. Wow. That's not even Colum. That's John Gillis. We should have much that should be here. This fucking low budget y'all smearing off. Why? This is just me. Talk about the Oscars.

What? What do you drink? God damn it. I'm taking my podcast back. What you're talking about the Oscars? It's T. Shut up. All right. Listen.

What kind of meal are you coming yourself down before bed? Listen, listen, here's a deal. We're talking about the Oscars before everything happened. And last night, it's so funny too, because I read a thing, I've hoving to post, posted this thing, Ricky Gervais trolling the Oscars. He put one tweet out last night. I know, that's it. One funny fucking tweet was self-deprecating a little bit,

like I guess they don't want me back or something like that. Some stupid thing. One tweet and they spread in the news that he's trolling the Oscars. Meanwhile, I read every other comics, I mean, nobody enjoyed it. Not one fucking comic. I know.

And I know we're cynical. I know we're, that's what we're supposed to do. We're supposed to trash shit that everybody's enjoying. I get it. But there are usually some moments of, oh, that was cool. That was awesome. Everybody fucking hated it.

Said it was a bore fest. And the rating show it down fire. I mean, 60 something. But you know what? Like nobody cares when they see these people anymore. It used to be rare. Like people would be excited to see Leonardo DiCaprio or whoever the fuck.

And now it's like, Will Smith is a huge YouTube star. It's like, if you want to see hours of him every single day, you can just log onto YouTube. He's not, there's nothing mysterious about him. It's like, oh, Will Smith's on another channel who gives a show. And there's iconic TV stars and movie stars doing old people insurance commercials

every other fucking second. And they're like, it wasn't that guy, like, isn't that guy a multi-millionaire from his sitcom? And he's trying to con-old people out of the fucking money now. Also, too, there's no host, but yet what's her name came out and did like five minutes up front? Who was what's her name? She directed one night in Miami.

So anyhow, do you see the opening she came out and opened the show? No. Do you have it? Mushroom. So they actually were all inside of a place. I know. I know. I distanced and it was, yeah, it was half full or something. I think pretty empty, but were they all wearing their vaccination stickers? I don't know. I guess they all got tested. It wasn't, I'm sure it wasn't as empty as your last weekend. Like a fucking look like I was in size split is on a second show. That second show sold well actually.

Shout out. You see the third one you do three. No no I did three on a Saturday. Yeah my hips at the end of the night I gotta do This Saturday because I'm not yours. I'm not doing Thursday. I'm I'm doing Friday and Saturday inside That's what I did Saturday three nuts It's it's kind of hard. Like literally by the end of it, I had to stretch out my hip flexors before I did.

I remember doing, I had to do three when I first started there. I think when you could smoke. And I remember just, my voice was just gone by, the second show just like this, because I just smoke building up, building up to stage. I have a video body, it'll get us, Mike and his pole looking like the stage. I have a video, Bobby. It'll get us.

Mike, there's Paul. Look at the odds. I fucking don't play it. What's their name? Who was doing it? Regina King, basically, she talked about the shave on and verdict and then told people to put on the masks. Oh, that's good.

That's what we want to hear. Right. That's what we want to hear. Could just talk more about, she talked about whatever. But even though they don't have a host She seemed like she opened the show as a host and Listen, I never saw I didn't see the movie with Anthony Hopkins who who won best actor, but I did see

Cascick whatever his name is and he was fucking amazed me uh, Cashwick, whatever his name is and he was fucking amazed me. He was fucking, I'm surprised he didn't win the Oscar because he was so good in my, my, my reigning, whatever. You know, can't even say it. Stinks, you can't even say the movies anymore. It's fucking my rang. I don't remember the name. I mean, it's thanks.

You can't even pronounce the people who won. You don't know, can't say the movie. You know what's going on back in the day. Goodfell won. You don't know, can't say the movie. You know what's going on. Back in the day, good fellas. Boom. So Ray Leota fucking Robert the Nero. Bank Jack Nicholson. Boom.

So what are you saying? No, they have, they have fucking, yeah, Tom Sallick is doing reverse mortgage commercials right now. This guy's been a fucking icon of television for 40 years. He's doing a re, you know what a reverse mortgage is? It's thinking to take somebody's house and hope they die in a year and then take all. My dad's on a commercial right now for old Tinder. What? I forget what it's called, but it's an app for old people to date and like fuck and my

dad's in the commercial. Oh, he does an actor. Yeah, he was. And now I think he dips his toe. Does he ever act like you're successful? Follow that other pale guy. the the the the the the the

the the the the the the the the the

the the the the the the the you know, the rocks are fucking Republican, right? You know that. Yeah, he's got a billion dollars. Yeah, it's funny that the Republicans are the ones with like, sense of humor is now. You know what I mean, back in the day, they were the ones like, get, get Jesus,

ban that music, you know, they were trying to burn albums and shit, and now they're the ones with senses of humor. It's fucking, I feel like everybody's kind of a pussy. I feel like everybody, if you encroach on their sensibility, everybody kind of like, it just, it's a different kind of thing for each group. Like if you do edgy, racial or social stuff, then the left people get all super fucking weird about it. But the, but the Republicans in the room might laugh. If you do some sex shit, the Republican sometimes get real fucking weird about it. And the Republicans in the room might laugh. If you do some sex shit, the Republicans sometimes get real fucking weird about it and it just gets uncomfortable. So it's like

different kind of groups have their fucking have their button. I just think there's a there's just a lot of posties out there right now. Oh, go. What do you think? Yeah, I agree. Yeah. I agree with all. Let's go. Oh, I wish you knew that's a wikie WD go when he got to which shut up. They work once a month and all this. Oh, you're giving fucking tips on audience. Shut up and do happy. You're working. The not working to give and I'll just ask me a job. I'm working. No, I'm working no, remember to December. It's excited. I'm just listening, I'm biting my time until the market correction

what do you call the funniest person the oscar's last night was that currently did a one-and-asker for uh... i think best supporting actress or maybe yeah did and she was semi-funny but there's no you know this is the worst time in history and you think and i even tweeted this a little you're might have helped move that fucking show along. That's not you it's not humor. It's humor. Oh, I'm sorry. Humor it's humor. Does it age?

You why even have it like I was it even a spectacle and not like was where their movies enough to even garner the award show itself like it was such a non- and like who watched all this shit for real like but aside for I don't even know what the chat with bozman movie was about and I saw that was a good movie yeah by only Davis was in it he was great that was a good movie so was the other movie about the black panthers uh that was the uh what you would call brother, right?

The biggest brothers, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's great. That was really good. That was really good. So they really had the A-listers there. Did you guys see them? See them? You don't like the Lucas brothers?

I like them a lot. I like them a lot. I'm so that's fucking amazing. I like two comedians. It's incredible. Yeah, you're the comedians. We're at the Oscars. That's fucking amazing. I like two comedians. That's incredible. Yeah, you're the comedians, you're at the Oscars. That's fucking nuts.

I love that. They wrote the movie. I was about Fred Hampton. It's not a whole lot to make up, you know? You're not in France. Come on, but a different black guy. That doesn't exist. Nellum impressed. Come on, but a different black guy that doesn't exist now. I'm impressed

They read Wikipedia and I'm done in there now You know what you got a point there fucking Irishman You're gonna fuck it. Yeah They were doing Wikipedia Make that did them They were doing Wikipedia. There you go. Make that did down. Sure. Did they even host? Did they even have this last year? I don't remember hearing nothing about it last year. Last year they did have it and it was down last year. Sock, I think, right?

Last year they had the last year either. Either they didn't have the last year. Well, after I believe after the host, Kevin Harkout and Trouble, Ricky Gervais kind of trashed Everybody and their mother They were like you know what we're not doing we're not doing we're not doing this anymore We're gonna well he did to go the gloves. I know I didn't say did the oscus. I said he hosted something else Um, but I think they're just done they're done with being offended. They're done with being offended.

They're done with being exposed for being hypocrites. And all the, here's the thing is that, I mean, Ricky Gervais, I've watched it a million times too. He exposed all of them for being hypocrites. They're just being an actor is just very hypocritical. And back in the day, they hit it. They weren't out there too much. They made their movies.

They did their interviews. They went on the tonight show with questions that were pre-approved. They didn't get exposed. And comics went and made fun. And did the stuff. It was a fun night of being in the Matrix. And then it just got to be a jerk off fast

and Ricky kind of exposed everybody and they couldn't take it. And now we have this boring night of horseshit with millionaires just fucking giving other millionaires a worth. And there's trickle in. And lecturing the poor. That's the most defensive part of the entire thing

is that you have like this wag of the finger and like telling you know, assuming they're changing a single mind. Like who's watching that on the fence about racism and or wearing a mask. It is just like, all right, we're just about to pre-diamond. It's just about to pre-diabetic fucking Americans eating nachos trying to have a fucking laugh. Yeah, wearing a dress. I know, like, idiot, dress up at home. Dave, already won a prize in life and I they're getting a prize for winning a fucking prize. It's kind of, you know, it's kind of, I

when I was at the Oscars, there was a movie star. What's in it? Working values. There was a working, working ballet working on my own act. Shut up. What? Shut up. He's a bone act. Listen to me. I'm getting C-Sick listening to these two. I gotta take Germany. Well, you're gonna see sick because all that spit. That's your scene material. That JC just gave me a nice slam. I got to give him credit. He gave me a nice slam. He just said Bobby knows.

Bobby knows the word humor because it's all of his I.D.I. screen. How's it going? Too shy. You can't. There was an actress at the Oscars. And you know, there was a lot of them.

You know, the dress with a long trains on the back Yeah, she had she had a fucking She had an old lady carrying her train around Probably your mother, huh? It was probably a mother And yeah, but that's like a I would enjoy that if a celebrity was just like yeah, I just got some old bitch to carry my shit. He'd be like, that's cool.

I think it's a lemma, old celebrity, right? Don't we like when there was celebrities? I don't like that they're trying to relate to us somehow. When it's like, guys, you have five houses. Somebody, the seven people helped you get ready tonight. You, you, you can look at your bank balance at an ATM and not cover the balance. So people behind you don't see how poor you are. I mean, how many of you, how many of those celebrities probably have the ring like their local precinct the next day and go look, that was just

for the cameras. I love you guys. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, it's easy to say defund the police when you have security following Yeah, probably private security defund the police. I wish the cops would do that. I wish the cops would just walk away from these events and let all the psycho fans just walk right up to them. Can you sign this? Just stick it right in her face. All those O and A fans. Yeah. Yeah, it is true.

You know, they just had the guy, the mayor, or the government, what the fuck was it? Of Portland was just like, listen, we gotta get these people, we gotta start arresting these people. They want Antifa gone because they just keep lighting the streets on fire and breaking windows and cause and he's like, if you see these tell, he's telling the public, if you see one of them report them. And it's like, no, I'm fucking going outside with my fucking iPhone. You nuts?

You got to get rid of him. Year later, they're finally saying it. Yeah, that's, he's finally had enough. He was actually, he was dressed like that. He was in, there's a video of him in the fucking getting tear gas with Antifa by the police and he was with them, walk marching with them during it. And now he's like, yeah, we're gonna get these fucking guys out of here. Oh fucking Portland Seattle, all those fucking places. Go fuck yourselves.

I love Seattle, Portland. They're fucking some of the most beautiful cities in this country. And you can't go there. And now you just can't, you can't do it. And they're getting rid of all the homeless people in LA. They're, they're by October. They said, what's that? They're killing them finally. Great game. If they just a bunch of rich millionaires decided to do that, I just really, what was that movie? Which one? Hunger Games? Well, they take them to an island and they just chase them down like,

fucking, your father's on there, just shooting them. Like, why would I be? How are they gonna get rid of homeless in LA? What's the plan? The plan is to give them housing. So to get rid of everybody gets housing. give them housing. So to get rid of how they get everybody gets everybody gets housing. Be front. I don't know how they're going to do.

Those little tiny houses, they're going to build them. Oh, dude, I want to live in a school bus. Yeah, keep keep doing what you're doing. The little tiny house school bus. Yeah, I don't have a 150 grand adumping at the inside of that. What do you want to stove to? Yeah, you ever see that?

That's like my whole algorithm right now, man. It's like people that just find it. I hate high cannon. Yeah, man, that's my whole algorithm right now, man. I just want to school us. Yeah, what about what about your son that just wants a house? A regular house. I'm working on it.

Yeah, can you stop with your shit dreams of a school bus? What's a house with a playroom? And I'm fucked. And somebody who's not going to taunt them in a basketball court. No, the playroom can be the wheel well. The wheel, wow, that's good. You got to get him into golf, dude.

That's what you got to do. I don't know. Yeah golf and archery. Yes. What? Oh, we should get into the extra 10. Yes, here we go. Listen, we're going to wrap this up. We do an extra 10. Let's just get started. Come on now. Oh, good. Now we're going into the extra 10 right now. That was the first hour of YKW. We now extra 10, anybody who's a member of Patreon, you will stay. And if you're not, you have to go to patreon.com,

which is scrolling down the bottom right now, or right there, see it? Can you see this right there? Patreon.com slash Robert Kelly, right there. Go there right now, you're gonna get the extra 10 we're gonna talk about Mike Fini being a dad. We're gonna get down and I mean Mike cannon Mike Fini killed his babies because he doesn't want children because he wants to be a star Mike would never have a child to ruin his trajectory into the fucking fame.

Let's Louis told no get one because it helps him writing and directing. So anyways, go to patreon.com slash Robert Kelly. Rich Voss is going to be at Side's, but it's this weekend, I believe, correct? Yeah. For all you people watching live right now, a lot of Florida people in here. Make sure you go and check out Rich Voss's I didn't know. And I fucking give you a plug. Can I just give you a plug. I mean you've been doing it since fucking opian Anthony Don't what just interrupting your plugs Why? I wish you get hair plugs.

Listen. Oh, really? Yeah, I do. I'm getting sick of your fucking gray mop. I'm just looking at you. Ha, ha, ha. Hey, don't take it off. We get it.

You still have hair. Shut up, you 63. We get it. You're awesome. Where are you going to be? Well, May 13, 14th and 15th, I'm going to be at Uncle Vinnie's in Point Pleasant, New Jersey. So come out to that. Then in June, I'm going to be in Laffitt up in Pekipsi. I got a bunch of dates coming up, going to be in Austin and Chicago, some stuff coming. So Mike Cannon, come to

Mike Cannon, comedy.com, one of the funniest young bucks coming up. Hey, uh, Mike Cannon comedy.com one of the funniest young bucks coming up a a column Here's a scenario column where's your food card going to be this column what bar are you drinking at on the weekends we have to stand comedy club very often follow me on Instagram or Twitter and

I'll post about that then. Well, how are they going to follow you? What's your what is it? I call them turtle. I call them spell it because nobody can hear you. C-O-L-U-N-T-Y-Double-O-E-Double-L. There you go. And can and what did you say, Jizrag? What did you want? What? What did you say? You said something. Oh Oh I think here's the scenario. Oh yeah great podcast. Yeah with me on the left button on the left button and also patreon.

So scenario pod we're putting out a lot of shit. I just put up a actually a video of me reacting to Edibles from last week fun stuff. Yeah, I'm a shenan of your videos lately. I mean, I got to videos lately. I mean, with the workout, I got a workout coming out that I just did a workout with this, this dude who plays professional basketball. He's like a fee of three on three. He's going to play in the Tokyo Olympics. So I did a workout with him, threw up within two minutes and gonna be playing

Bob. He's really, he was really big. So I'm out of shape. What your mouth shut up. All right, well, make sure you join patreon.com and robber on robbercatalive.com. Mike V. Suarez, check him out. I'm going to be, of course, at Newtown Theater this weekend. And then New Brunswick Square Mall in front of the orange Julius. And then I'm going to be in Auburn at the crown of comedy and the paper mill.

So make sure you check out all those days robincadalive.com. And there you go. And so we are in the extra fucking Patriot. All right. So we got I want to thank everybody. Please subscribe on YouTube. Hit the subscribe button right now. Hit the comment button, hit the like button.

The YouTube has grown fucking crazy in the last couple months. I wanna thank you guys all you who subscribed. Hope you like all the episodes. Next month, we have Erie Spears and we have another special guest. I am not announcing yet for the month of April. Oh, May, May, right?

Moosh, May. Yes, sorry about that. Yep, May, we got a, I'm very excited to have Eric Spears on. Do you know Eric Spears with us? Yes, I knew when he first started. Fucking funny guy, man. I termed him all day when we used to do the Urban Club's when he first started as a little kid.

I mean, hilarious guy, great on fucking Instagram on YouTube is all over YouTube and he was fucking his impressions are just insane. Yeah, he's just great. He's fucking great. He's coming to terminal D and club 88 all of the black clubs we used to do and he was like, I think his mom used to drive them to the gigs. He was like real young Well, he's coming on in May We got a other special guest coming on. It's gonna be a great month. So stay subscribed Don't leave patreon. Don't leave the YouTube all these come up here. You get the extra half patreon only and make sure you go and Patreon only and make sure you go and YKWD on Instagram. What is the other stuff much talk to them at YKWD on Instagram? Go. Yeah, that's the big one right there. Keep followers on that and also yeah

That's right comic wearables.com if you go there right now you can get on my merch You get the squiggly Robert Kelly. You get the YKWD red and white on the tit. Right now, and if you use the code word ladybugs, 20% off, ladybugs, everybody who's a member of the Patreon, you get 20% off. Aaron Berg just bought that Robert Kelly,

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Support them live because that's what we really fucking make our living. And I want to thank all the ladybugs coming in tonight. All you girls, all you fucking guys. I want to thank you the ladybugs coming in tonight all you girls all you fucking guys I want to thank you guys for being live with the Oscars I get better ratings oh shit nice one mush coming at the end well I know that see you next week you know what that I buy everyone on Bush coming at the end. Well, I know that. See you next week. You know what, Dad? Bye, bye everyone. Thanks. you