Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Noam Dworman, Bill Grundfest & Liz Furiati | Transicles

Episode Date: July 30, 2023

This week Bobby is joined by the Owner of the Comedy Cellar, Noam Dworman, founder of the Comedy Cellar, Bill Grundfest and Lix Furiati, the Comedy Cellars manager. They talk about the Comedy Cellar's live stream show which will be streamed to Regal's all over the country on August 5th. Bill talks about founding the Cellar with Noam's dad, Manny. And the time Bob Dylan came to the Cellar to rub is success in Manny's face. This episode is sponsored by GhostBed Listeners can get 40% off all products sitewide! Use promo code YKWD at GhostBed.com/ykwd for 40% Off Sitewide. Limited Time Only. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp Visit BetterHelp.com/DUDE today to get 10% off your first month! This episode is sponsored by Ship Station Get a 60-day free trial at https://www.shipstation.com/ykwd. Thanks to ShipStation for sponsoring the show! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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How do you feel about norm? I love norm. How do you know if you, if you had to take his father or norm? What you know, there's ask me oh Ask me okay, if manny Let's do it again ask me again, all right, manny Yeah, baby, we're starting the podcast right now We're back, you know what dude live welcome everybody to the show

Started the social media podcast Why can't you do podcasts why can't we do these back again? Oh We're all starting before them all Podcast is so fun and crazy, and there's no rules. Shut up, you all ruining this! Burn the block, damn it, man! I'm so sorry, it's a comedy podcast.

This is an NPR. That's the podcast done! Is there any better show? This is the original original. What's up everybody, it's Robert Kelly we're at it again. I feel I hear the tinny again. No you don't I do I do here But whatever it doesn't matter as long as it sounds good to you. Does it sound good? Sounds good to me sounds so much better I sound tinny. No, no, no anyways. Robert Kelly coming from you live Comedy seller No, no, no. Anyways, Robert Kelly coming from you live, comedy seller, studios above the world famous comedy seller.

Tonight show is a very special edition. Why? Because we have the owner of it all. The guy who owns every single comedy seller out there. I mean, they're popping up like Chick-fil-A's now. He's got a theater comment. He's got a lot of stuff. We got the GM who runs it all, who does everything so he can stay home and take naps and enjoy all his

money by his pool and go to Greece and take cool photos of his sexy wife. And on top of that, we have the guy who started the comedy seller. Ladies and gentlemen, the guy who made it possible for Liz to have a job, me to have a job, and for Noam to own the No.1 comedy club in the world, Bill Grunfest, everybody, Liz and Noam, the owner of all are here. Thank you for joining us.

We have Noam no on zoom because Yeah, we can oh my god. It's like talking to my mother. Can you hear? Where am I am I too close back up from the lens Jesus? Or you don't know what I've gone to I'm at a friend's house. They promised I could do a zoom from their house And I think they've had four different Attempts to get me online. But I think this is the sound okay. Yeah, talking about it's two thousand twenty three went through a pandemic. I mean, I know

everybody should not have been online. Crazy. Where are they? Why are you at a friend's house by the way? What are you? 15? You're having a birthday party for me. Oh How old you you 58? I'm 61. Oh, it's a birthday While you were in Greece right no Greece was last year while I was in Italy. No, it was I was hall Where were you on a boat you're on a boat Italy. That was the Amalfi coast. Oh, sorry. I'm sorry. I can't keep up with this extravagant fucking vacation. I'm in the Hampshire choppin' wood.

You're out in a fucking yacht. What are you showing us, your penis? You're showing us the comedy seller where it comes from. The goods, we're gonna prove us wrong about the Jewish man. Let's see it. But what do you mean prove your wrong? What do you mean by that?

Oh, Jewish man, I know for the big Stamakeys. Oh, okay, okay. Not know for their small ones either, by the way. Just regular Stamakeys. Perfectly average size. Should mean speaking of perfectly average size Stamakeys. They'll grow in fast everybody. Thank you.

Thank you, I haven't had any complaints so far. So here's the deal. But who can talk with them now? First of all, I can. Apparently, I lost a loss. I was 350 pounds last year. Are you? What you really don't ever touch me, Bill?

I, uh, they told me they warned me. Don't touch him. I ever, I, uh, first of all, the mega millions, three, eight hundred and twenty million. If I win, I'm gone. him. I ever. I, first of all, the mega millions, 820 million. If I win, I'm gone. But I'm gone. And I'm going to pay somebody to rewrite history that I started the comedy seller.

I'm going to whitename from the books. Bill who? That's what I was going to say. Bobbe. Bobbe Kelleh, start of the comedy seller. How do you like that? I'm going to open up a comedy seller on my island. And I'm going to spell it with case.

So you can't sue me, no. Nice talking to you. Sorry, it's always good to get a laugh a second after. Where's this island we're going to? I don't know, I haven't bought it yet. Yeah, Liz is coming to, I'm taking Liz. And my dog. Yeah, your dog, of course you're taking it, dog.

No, am you coming? You wanna come? To where? I'm if I win 820 million, you want to come to my island and live. Yeah, absolutely. All right, good. You're in. Bill, you can come to. I'll bring my wife to life. No, I'm not bringing.

I'm going to pay for Don and your wife to live the life that they've always wanted to live with a man. Without you. With men. For the poor boy. Yeah, with a poor. You know, I don't have a pool. I had an in-text pool.

Oh boy, poor boy. Oh, you have a poor boy? He has no pool, but he has a poor boy. He has a pool. You've been no time. No, I've heard about it. You've never been passing through. I mean, the guy who made it possible for you to have your fucking pool.

And you've never had a man, you house. Many, many, I'm in trouble. Because that's what podcasts are about. How are you gonna get clicks if I ain't talking shit? I wanna know at what dollar amount you decided to start playing that particular game? 800 and 120. I wanna say, first of all, your energy, very therapeutic. It almost annoying. I want to open up to you and it's bugging me

I want to tell you about my listation and why my wife's a twat, but listen I fucking love this guy knows Why was eight was 810 million not sufficient to play the game was 790 at what point did you say I got to get in there? Well, no, I just, I don't mess, I don't gamble. I don't like losing money. I play slots, not slots, the, yeah, the slot machines when I go away a little bit. I don't like it, but when it gets up to a ridiculous,

holy fuck, almost a billion dollars, I'm gonna, I'll do it just for shits and giggles. Like, I got a bunch of the door guys over there. I said, pick numbers, if they win, I'm gonna give a money. Because if I a bunch of the door guys over there. I said pick numbers. If they win, I'm going to give them money. Because if I do win, I will give the money. I will give the money. Have you decided how much money?

Yeah, 100,000 each. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, I'm like, I get my crazy. I was going to say like $10. No, I'll give 100,000. I'll give all the autistic guys that work for me here. I'll give them some type of medical thing for later insurance.

Long term insurance. Long term insurance for their autism. And I will get Danny a helmet that just makes his eyes look straight. If you win, if you win, I just want a bunch of matchbooks. Yeah, I'm going to get him a train set in matchbooks and a hand job from a black truck. You can light himself on fire.

Light himself on fire, How do you like it? So I'm fired, Danny. All right, Danny has a microphone. Is that all right? Let me do the jokes, Bill. Listen, the thing is, I'm kidding. It's been a long time. Listen.

Bill, first of all, I want to give you a little credit. You started the comedy cell. You're a Golden Globe winner, writer, three time Emmy nominee, founder of the comedy cell with Noam's Dad. Yeah. Yep. And you have this new thing going on with Nome, right?

Of course. Okay. And this is why I love, and I'm going to say it, not because it fits his birthday, not because I love him. Nome is a sneaky innovator. He just... What am I doing? Well, he does things when he does something, it's usually a hit.

He doesn't do things that kind of fuck off. You know what I mean? A lot of stuff is presented to no, but if he's going to do it, it's usually like, oh, this is this idea is going to work. He's very... He knows how to susbose shit out. Now, whose idea was it? Was it Bill's? Bill's idea. Okay, Bill, tell us what your idea was when you brought it to know him.

Well, you see, I would all start it with this. No, but do it in that voice from now on, because I really liked it. Is that how you have to talk to him? Because he makes me talk to him like that too. And after we're a skirt, I have to talk to them? Because he makes me talk to them like that too. And after we're a skirt, I have to go to know them. I'd like earlier spots. And, I don't know if that's a work.

No, I have to close every fucking show. Dude, it's a compliment. Shut up. All right, go ahead. No, can we not look at your tits the whole show? I got it. Wow. And now I'm strangely aroused.

But, yeah, so it occurred to me that while there is a ton of Netflix specials, and you can see stand-up specials on your TV and on your devices and everything, that what we're missing in that is the experience of laughing out loud at the comedy, which only happens when you're in an audience with other live people because laughing like my ex-wife is contagious. And so I said, this is the last mile problem in comedy. We can get the content to people, But can we have them experience it with the laugh out loud experience? And then in fourth grade, I said to myself,

I'm sorry, that's, you know, Manning used to do that. That was my favorite thing, No, it was father used to do. When he would get me to tell a story, he would, every day, and I'd be like, no, no, no, no, keep going. I'd be like, all right, let's have,

still, it would do it like six times. The bottom line is that you left 30 times as much when you're in a live audience. Right. And so, there's all this stuff out there. How can we do this, I said, to know them, what if we live streamed comedy seller into movie theaters? Right. So that people for the cost of a movie can go

to their local movie theaters. Right. And it's like being at the comedy seller For the price of a movie and you don't have to schlep to New York City now. Here's the thing This couldn't happen 10 years ago this could because all Movie theaters have digital and they're you know hooked up and because pandemic, everything, all technology just got pushed through. So now that you have the ability to live stream the comedy seller, now, not for nothing Bill. I went to know a couple of years ago

and said we should be live streaming virtual on the goggles. We should have a camera in one of the rooms where you can just sit in your VR, your VR, and just go to the comedy seller seller pay five bucks ten bucks and watch a show like you're in the front row That's still a good idea. That is a good idea. Can we do that? Can I be part of good ideas? Yes, Bobby No, I never believed in VR

And I'm having there just continuing a lot of VR's Hardware now great. Thanks. No, thanks. There goes my dreams That's why I played the Mega Millions, because I can't depend on this guy, because I like you can. No, but it's a great idea, because when you, when was, has it ever been done? Number one, I think it has with specials,

like prior maybe a, somebody put in the movie theater, right? Prior did, you know, did his specials, they were recorded specials. Were they in the theaters? Yes. Okay. But not alive. Not alive.

But not alive. But not live. But they haven't released, well, who's the last person? You're thinking of Muhammad Ali. No. He did stand up. No, he didn't.

He was funny though. I'm talking, who is the last stand up to have a special in theaters? A recorded special in theater. I'm asking the three the last stand up to have a special in theaters. A recorded special in theater. I'm asking the three autistic kids that work here with laptops in front of them. Oh my God. Kevin Hart did something. Oh yeah, Kevin Hart.

There you go. Kevin Hart did it, right? And that actually sort of jump started his career at that point, didn't it? Well, it helped, but he was already there. But this, here's what's good about this is because you're going to go see a real New York City comedy seller show anywhere. So you're going to go to the theater anywhere in the world or anywhere in the country. Forty eight regal theaters. And to find out you say regal, is that the name of the theater?

Are they very fancy both? They're both. Nothing. Nothing. I mean, he's the, it's like having the old guy in the puppets. And the puppets, you know, yeah, the puppets, except the other one's dead. He's just sitting there. He's dead. Regal, no, Regal is the movie chain. It was a joke. I got it. And the, what was the last time he stepped on stage, Bill? Long time. Well, you've been in front of a computer, typing away for a long time. What

the fuck? Come on. Now I'm getting it from both ends. Yeah, that's the way you're liking it, Sissy. Ooh, sorry. So then, well, what was the question? Oh yeah, so regal, yes. So get it back. Getting it into both ends, right? Yeah. How do you think I got the job?

But regal, yeah. So 48 regal movie theaters. Yeah, in the East Coast and Central Time Zone. So not the West Coast. Not the West Coast. That's great, because I say so. Fuck them. Fuck them. Well, you know what? uh... in the east coast and central time zone so not the west coast not the west coast that's great because i say welcome well you know what here's a thing i think the west coast maybe if it goes well you go there because people in

the west coast love movies yeah they love going to the really hot there too so they're not like we go to the movies when it's we go to the movies uh... like summertime stuff like that rainy out uh... and i feel like movies have been dying because they've gotten so shitty and forced. You know, the day of the movie, the epic summer open. I mean, it's kind of dead. If I personally, if I was somewhere,

and I could go watch the being a comic, if I could go watch the seller a comic, if I could go watch the seller a live show, Bobby. I'd go do it. No, man, I saw the test. We went to New Rochelle to the theater there and saw the test. Thanks for the invite, guys.

Appreciate it. You were, I'm sorry, at your tiny house chopping wood. So if you were around clearly, you would have been there. All right, there. I just want to know. But thank you, Liz. It was unbelievable. I want one, I'm fired. I'll want to know but thank you Liz it was Unbelievable it was unbelievable it was so hang on one second. I didn't have a dad. What'd you say no? I

Had suggested inviting you a Liz said the holding will just do it just cause so many hiccups I called me a fucking hiccup. Yeah, I called you a hiccup because you were in New Hampshire chopping wood all right I take it okay But it was it was amazing like it was really fucking cool to see this in the movie theater I'm telling you huge on the screen like I Mean and you know me I was laughing Bobby. I was laughing at these jokes like it was yeah, wait a minute Yeah, yes, did you have a drink? I was sober. Did you have a drink? No Did you drink anything? No, did no one put anything in the drink no drugs no alcohol?

No, you want to know Zambak? I wish no I was stone cold sober. It was really good and entertaining and it look like it felt so vibrant and big and then it was weird When I got back to the village underground. Yeah. Because we're streaming the underground show from the village underground. It was almost like, oh, this is, I don't want to watch this. This is too small. Right. This is, this is not good enough.

Not big enough. Well, here's what's got, I wish I went because I want to see what it looks like. I want to see the camera. I just want to see, but here's what's going to be great. People are going to be offended again. Oh, yeah. People are going to have things said that they're like, fuck couples are going to have to deal with,

they're going to have to deal with shit in a movie theater. Yeah. Which is great. You know, look, you come to the cellar, I get it. But you go to a theater thinking comedy, you know, you're going to be like, oh, that's fucked up. And people are going to have to be in that mode of having to deal with their

emotions around a bunch of people. And comedy is contagious. And 100% is. And that they might fall in love with this idea. This might be the next big thing, by the way. It was cool. And here and there's no movies being made. I mean, you guys, the strike, the writer's strike, there's no movies being made, there's nothing getting out there new content, and you guys are gonna put this out now. I got a question. No?

Yeah. Why are we seeing less and less of your body? Yeah. That's a fucking question. I mean, you're the owner of everything. I mean, when my shirt bunch is up, it looks like I have man pools, it's not all. I mean, you're the owner of everything. I don't know where my shirt bunch is up. It looks like I have man pools, it's like all. All right, well, I made one tick comment.

He gets all fucked up. I didn't know you're that insecure. You think this impression of senior Wences with the head in the box and, okay, I'll shut up now. Thanks. This is the bomb, and this is the bomb, and then I give it to him. Put that on your mic. That's what we know who's the last person who did a joke that bombed

uh... that's tied on make a knot i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i 48, 48, regal movie theaters and if people want to get tickets, which we clearly want them to, yes, regmoves.com, not regal movies, regmov, R-E-G movies.com. Is that on the Comedy Cellar website also? Yeah, yeah, and it's on, and you know, Danny's put it on the Instagram and you can click through and you know, everyone knows how to use Google.

You just Google regal cinemas and then you go to Comedy Cellar and it's literally right up there. So, You just Google regal cinemas and then you go to Comedy Seller and it's literally right up there. And all the regal cinemas now, they're all like those nice theaters with like the reclining seats. You get to pick your seat, all that shit. Well because they had to opt their game because we're not going in with shit seats. It's nice.

And people screaming and yelling, I'll just go to an Alamo and get a hamburger and if someone's talking, I'll write a note and rat them out. No, this is good. You know, so this is great, but here's the thing. How are the comics being compensated? Not to get too technical, but like if, yep. Well, if you met 40 something theaters and it sells out every theater, every show, hang on,

let me finish Bill. It sells out every show. You're going to make a shitload of money, right? Maybe, or maybe not, because I don't know, how does that work? It's an excellent question, Robert. Thank you. And do you own the content? You get to sell it, you get to play it, do you get to keep doing it?

Keep throwing it out there. No, no, the comics on the content. We're not recording any of it. This is all live stream live live, not recorded, not record. You get one shot. Like I said, we recorded, but we don't show it to anybody. It's recorded. We keep it in a vault and nobody ever sees it. Where's the vault? The vaults at the pool under the pool, under the pool boy in the tourist. And the quarter kept on the servers. And the the to answer your question. Yeah. And answer it perhaps a little bit obliquely. Yeah. I don't know what that word means. It means to answer it without answering. I'd down it down, Bill. You're on YKWD. I don't want to be pusillanimous. This isn't robot. I'll go. Double it down.

So the comedians, just like when comedians do the minchos, they get paid extra. Okay. And this, this, we have no idea how it's going to do. Right. Comedians are getting paid extra on top of that. Okay. So if this becomes a hit, then you have to trust us that we will adjust how much right relative to the to the value because who's bringing the value? It's the comedian 100 percent. It's not yours. No, it's it's not

This is nobody's paying to see no one with his I could smell shit, but I don't know where it is face Wow really yeah look at it. I mean, know where it is face. Wow, really? Yeah, look at it. I mean, I've never seen this. I love no. Every time I see him, hi, Robert. Mateo comes in. Hi Mateo.

Well, you're out, Bobby. Bobby's out. So, Mateo got fat over the pandemic and lost his hair. No, then he went and he got new hair. No, no, Nomenesty would dump in him in two seconds. If he had male pattern baldness, and he got fat, I'm telling you that he paid for new hair. God dammit.

Right? Go ahead, Bill. Look at my finger. Look at my finger. Focus, follow me. Go ahead, let's do it. So this is sort of a pig in a poke. We have no idea.

No, I never call. I lost a lot of weight, man. When I work my ass off, I got a stomach surgery and I'm doing good. What'd you call me? Pig in a poke. No. He calls you pig in a poke.

No, I'm saying this is what I'm saying is, this is an unknown succeed thing. You have a good man to hand job, Bill. No, go ahead, listen. A man you say. Yes, go ahead. I'm trying to get a rise out of no. But guy, are you frozen or is that your face?

I'm watching, I'm just watching taking it in every good man in a hand job. That was funny. Thanks. I take laughs too. I hope you're not the fucking audience. I think I had the time to change like he said, a man like, it was a time he wouldn't have understood that but now he can be like, because a woman could have a dick. So like, I'm your man. It's funny how things have changed. And that's why he's in Mensa.

Mm-hmm. Is that what you meant, Bill? No, I'm just wondering, are we elevating the podcast from where typically is, or are we? Oh yeah, yeah, you guys, yeah, 100%. Yeah, yeah. So in conclusion. So I'll just answer the question, how much of the comedians get paid?

Well, I don't know that we wanted just Bandy about figures. I'm saying, I don't want answers. I was in these words, Bandy, I got to look all this shit up. What's happening? I'm saying, yes, that just like the comedies get paid for doing the seller spot. I know you're fucking us because you're using too many hand gestures. The comedians get paid for doing the seller spot that I know you're fucking us because you're using too many hand gestures. The Americans get paid. For what the hands down. I want to see it deliver this without hands. And then. All right, so listen, you're going to put this out there. It's a test run. It's what you going to see if it works. If it works, you're going to adjust. If you guys make a million dollars.

Of course. And you paid everybody a thousand. You're going to be like, look, we're going to have to get because I'm telling you right now, I say it's right to the camera. No, and his father and the comedy seller, first ones in New York City to raise the money, raise it again, with up being asked and raise it again. They're the ones who pay the comics reasonable amount of money to work. I mean, they are pretty honest with it. And, and when they, A, we should do this, care, give it to them. He doesn't care.

He doesn't care about that. He doesn't care about, he loves money. Of course, everybody likes money, but he will fucking pay the comics what they need to get to make them happy. Because he knows that the comics are the most important thing. No, did I say that word for where the way you wrote it? Yeah, that's exactly right, Robert.

All right, thank you so much. Well, well delivered. Thank you, I had him on spend at the end. That was good. Thanks. And obviously, this is all happening in public, so there's no way to hide if it's a success. Yeah.

So right now, it's just who the hell knows what's gonna happen? It could be a success in some places. So it could be a bomb in other places. Bill, what I'm hearing, what I'm hearing here, and I might be crazy. You might be inventing the comedy seller again, 30 something years later. Gakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakakak You might be inventing the new version, the technology version of the comedy seller, 30 something years later.

You're giving me a little shippilcus. You're giving a little for clumped here. Yeah, that is exactly. Wow, that was the impetus of this. This is the way. I'm gonna hit you. If you say, you get two more big words. I know a lot of ways.

Don't say impetus is not his problem anymore. Go ahead. In some phone, we got impetus. We got, what did he say? I missed it. Who was it? Pagan of Penn? What was it?

I asked what he called me. Oh, sorry. He called me that my wife. He called me a pagan. He called my wife a pen. It was pretty nice. Oh my God. No, but that was what gave rise to the idea.

Right. And also, if I can get their apuric Can I get their apuric your your voice is already there. Why thank you. Yeah your body. Oh, you're very that you look My you look at my therapist. He looks just like Alan go ahead. I see that Little disturbing you've met his there. Liz you go to Alan too. No, I've met Alan and she should Disturbing when I met Alan today. Tell you that it was at the 4th of July premiere Why so do introduce me? I'm sitting right behind him and so does like Alan this is Liz and he goes oh, yeah Hi Liz and the first thing that went through my head was fucking Bobby Bobby's complaining about me to Alan on this mother fucker

I can't believe it. I was so angry at you. Not you I've never complained about you to anybody. Well then every other comic that goes to Alan probably did. I'm lying when I said that I'm not Alan. I've never talked to you about you Alan. Talked about fucking no more couple times Yeah, my my mother actually said to me once and you tell your psychiatrist. I'm not afraid of him. Yeah, tell your mother. I said hi. The thing is, come on. This is going. Bill, how long has it been since you've been on a stage? Stand up. What? Like a working stand up. Decades, decades. And you just went into writing your,

well, yeah, what happened was when I was here and the club was doing doing reasonably well and man he cut you out Yeah, I said bait it. This is mine. No, I was I was 34. Yeah, I had you know, the club was doing reasonably well. Yeah I had been doing the college circuit with a one-man show called is their life after college, right? doing the college circuit with a one-man show called is their life after college. So that had, I did about 300 colleges, it good money and a lot of money. There it is, a lot of money. A lot of money.

And had a radio show on NBC on 66 WNBC. Yes, how it's there. And so I had that for a couple years till they sold the station. And I was Saturday and Sunday afternoons. And then I filled in the how it's turned thing the when how it got fired That's what created the vacuum into which I stepped which I can tell you the story if you want to hear sure Go ahead because what are we doing? We got time right?

I mean you have time you don't have a lot of time either But the thing is I gotta go But the thing is I gotta go No, I know how to shut this clock sucker up don't you deal I'll deal with this fucking long-winded motherfucker. I got Are you saying the time thank you guys for listening to the YKW tune it next week when Bill tells the story by himself on zoom They're implying Tired emoji. I don't know howgey. I don't even know how it works. I don't know, but your face is half on it. Did you just still, I mean, if anybody has the OCA, D-H-D-C-D-B-B's, the Jew.

Absolutely. Yeah, 100%. I think that Robert is implying that I'm being low-quacious. Not you. Oh, yeah, you get too more. Oh, Jesus. No, no. All right, go ahead, so tell me. So, how I got the job that went Howard Stern going on.

Yeah, real quick, go ahead. I'm walking down Christopher Street backwards, and I see, I did that just for you, Robert. There's a near post headline that says Howard Stern gets fired. And so most people would go, oh, well, that's kind of interesting. I go, there's a job open. Wow. And so I called NBC, that's for the program director, and I got to his assistant to his secretary. And I posed as a guy named Mark Garden, who was the producer of the comedy seller.

And I said, our star MC would be great for the Howard spot. You really need to come down. Wow. And I said, I've faxed them some reviews that we had. To a fake voice, did you do this voice? No, I did this voice. People in those days, they never connected the voice on a phone with the voice in person.

Yeah, okay. So I faxed them a couple of reviews that we had from the seller that mentioned my name very nicely and a nice cover letter and they wanted to come down on a Wednesday. And I said, Oh, no, no, no bill is on the road during the week. He's only in on the on the weekends, the big shows. So come down Saturday. Why did I do this? Because you know, because you come on Wednesday and there's 11 people, you're gonna look like shit. Not anymore. No, not anymore. I'll call money bags, how many people on a Wednesday? But in those in 1980s, see his pool fucking built in the cover comes pisses the button from inside. He goes cover and he goes, we have to cover the vault. Yeah, you do.

He goes cover and he goes, we have to cover the vault. Yeah, you do. Yeah. There's a fucking dip. That's what the Tesla, but he can't take the Tesla to Montreal tomorrow. Nah, I can't go ahead. He has to take the Mercedes,

speed it up, Bill. You fucking fuck me. So. So they come down on a Saturday. They come down. Thank you. They come down. It's the cognitive decline.

They're the general manager of your stories. I missed the second you start over. Oh my god. I'll play it back. I'll play it back. I've had him forced to create. I was so stupid. So they come down on a Saturday because I

knew that if they show up on an eight o'clock Saturday show That yeah, there's no way I can look bad. Yeah, right? And so I'm going where you're from No, they wanted to come on Stop it don't listen in focus. Why didn't you let them come on? Be gone my god This is the worst day in my life. I really wish that they had been working. I was trying to attack this right now in conclusion.

So they came down and they saw me and they said, Oh, well, this is interesting. And then they hired a chrome. Well, don't get ahead of me. And so they, so they said, would he come, said, would Bill come in to do a taped audition? Yeah, of course. And so I did a couple of taped auditions. I asked Rick to come and be my voice guy so that we could do pre-recorded bits and song parody and that kind of thing.

And they loved all of that. Then they put me on the air live overnight, like 2 a.m. to 4 a.m. just to make sure that I'm an crazy person. Right. Made that mistake. And then three months later, they call to say, look,

we can't give afternoon drive to a guy who's never done major market radio. So how about Saturday and Sunday afternoons and filling in for I'ma's and soupi sales and whoever we get for the afternoon drive? I said, shit, yeah. And then, so that was that for a couple of years and then they sold the station.

Well, kind of scratch you getting for this. Back then. $35 an hour. I mean, that's a lot of money. In the 20s? mean, that's a lot of money. In the 20s? Yeah, that's a lot. Yeah, that's making no money. Throw up right now.

Yeah, money. It was a $35? No, it was $75. They'll touch me again. I swear. I'm sorry, it was $75. Okay, that's great. It was $7 more money.

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Esta es la 3 por uno señal, que significa que ya puedes aprovecharte del 3 por uno en medianas a domicidio solo pidiendo el line. ¿Saparao? 3 por uno, 3 por uno. Ah, no, no, no. ¡Dominos! Pizza. ¿Sueñas con un futuro más allá de los estudios de grado?

Gracias a las becas de posgrado en el extranjero de la Fundación La Caixa, puedes estudiar en las mejores universidades y centros de investigación del mundo. Tu talento te mueve. Solicitad tu beca en Fundación La Caixa.org. There's nothing isn't there. You created where there was no club or no place to perform for you or what was happening. You just said, Hey, what about this space? And you made this space where there was no, there was a, there was a radio show or space.

You were like, I'm going to, I'm going to make a job for myself there. And now 30 something years later, you're like, listen, I want to be back in the comedy game, working with the comedy seller. I see a little thing here. What about this? And you're creating another avenue for you to stay in the comedy stand-up comedy game. Maybe not doing stand-up right now. Well, you know, the audience has spoken on that. And no, I did too. No, I still have delusions of grandma, as Mike wrote used to say. And I still think that I can do a set well, sure.

But why? There are so many people, like the last time I did a set, next door, the, my whole attitude with what I said to the audience, I said, you know, this is amazing. You're seeing all of these brilliant comics that craft this original material and they have their own point of view and their own voice. I don't do that. I just tell jokes. And then I ramp into all of these old story jokes.

And so you gave them the psychological nudge they needed to understand what the fuck you're about to do. It's not what you're used to because stand up is changed. It's a little more intimate, a little more honest, a little more edgy, you know, political bubble up back then. I remember you guys were doing it because I saw you and Rick on the reunion thing. You did silly wacky, almost TV type of things. That was hilarious, but right, maybe the younger kids might not

get that now, but you put them in the space to get it. So that's cool. I, I, I think that if this becomes a hit, right? Yeah. Are you a known partners on this? Well, I, I would, I, the short answer is everyone involved is comfortable with the arrangement. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I want out he just goes and hides in a closet and then it'll come out if it did it work out. Yeah, are you nervous? No About this yeah, no, I'm not nervous at all. Why are you not happy with the deal? I'm kidding. I'm happy with the deal. I'm happy with I'm I'm I don't I'm to be honest Robert

I'm at a point in my life where I'm not getting sufficient. I'm not, I'm not, I don't have a NAICS sufficient engagement with the, the thing that I, that I use to. Like, if it goes, it goes, it doesn't, it makes, but I don't, I just wanted to succeed. I don't really care about the deal. Yeah, so what you're saying is you have so much money that you don't care anymore. You're a set for life and so are your kids. No, no, it's not about, it's not about, it's not about, it's definitely not a matter is you have so much money that you don't care anymore. You're set for life and so are your kids. No, no, it's not about, it's not about,

it's definitely not a matter of being set for life or having so much money. It actually is something psychologically going on with me where because I'm so involved with my family and stuff like that, I don't, I'm having, I have trouble mustering the same yeah total involvement and obsession that I

used to have for any new project that I did right competes it can pizza loses quite often for the front of my mind with like my kids guitar lesson or something you know yeah this is this is a little dangerous but they got to have Liz because Liz really you know takes a lot of that off my shoulder.

Hi stress. Yeah, I'm so glad it's Liz too. No, I understand that because look, I'm up at the tiny house with my family, Sunday night, I'm sitting by a fire with Max and Dawn shooting the shit. We were playing like radio, old radio stories over the outdoor speaker. I'm sitting by a fire with Max and Dawn shooting the shit. We were playing like radio, old radio stories over the outdoor speaker. You make smores? Yeah, he was making 100% he was making marshmallows

and we're just giggling and laughing. And you know, I was like, and I had to go. I had to go back to the city, but you know, I was like, man, if it's just if I could stay up there one more day, that would make me happy. I mean, look, when I get into it, it's like, it's like, Narnia. Yes. Yeah, it's like, and I've been to Nome's house.

Yeah. Nome's house is so comfortable. You could just chill out in the backyard and this section, go up to the top section, play some basketball. You can run, the kids can run around, we can talk, it's almost like a vacation right at your house. So. Some day bill will come.

One day I don't wanna push. Hey pal, no, let me know when that day is though. Okay. I'm gonna go up to the tiny house. I'm gonna make things worse though. I mean, let me know, I don't bring my wife. I don't want to put it through this. There's already some tickets sold.

I mean, I'm gonna go to, it's playing down at Essex Crossing down by the bridge. We should all go. I'm going. I'm gonna go see it. What night is it? Am I here? No, you're probably, it's August 5th.

What day? Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. No, I'm not here. Where are you? Is it playing in the Hampshire? Yes. Where in the Hampshire? I may be able to take a ride to

Portsmouth and go get tickets. You should go. It's in the Portsmouth. And don't tell me what to do. Listen, I know you think you're a big shot now because you're going to be a shot. No, I'm not going to ask me a question. Yes, no.

Liz, if I'm in Maine, who's going to stage manage the show because it has to be one exactly on time? Oh, boy boy. Oh those shows run exactly on time. Oh boy. You don't need to be those shows run exact hosting. I don't know. I feel like a Ron of itches shows all start exactly He's doing it. Yeah, and then a Ron of itches and then SD will be there, but those shows are gonna see is already hosting it Absolutely not there you go. I love already. I love already. It's not on time. No. Yeah. So what about Ray? Ray is not hosting it. Oh, I'm sorry. Your best friend, a rubber. Ray. He's probably in a rubber. Is he okay? I don't know who cares. Um, so now

are you going to be here for it? Are you going to be here? Yes. I'm going to be at the club. I'm going to be either there or I'm going to be at the club. I'm gonna be either there or I'm gonna be at the Mx to see, you know, like, like, zero mastell and, can I make a suggestion? Can we vote? Uh huh. Can we vote? Yes, you can, go ahead vote.

Raise your hand if I can. Make a suggestion. All right. No, can I make a suggestion? Oh, you make a suggestion. Can we hire somebody to videotape the seller part of it behind the scenes and go to a theater and secretly videotape the crowd laughing and having a good time so we can have an awesome promotional video after the fact of how great it was so that when

we promoted again, right, you can write Danny, what are you doing with the biggest August? That's a great idea. Danny's on it. Danny's not the guy to do it. No, no, no, he's not the guy to do the, I'm gonna say I'm not the guy. He's not the guy that I will get. We need to tell you why Danny's not the guy that I will get we need

He said sorry about the fucking Malaysia Danny walk outside right now, so you don't cry Danny Danny's gonna cry Danny's gonna cry. He's crashing like a plane Maybe To just get some video of the line waiting to come into the cellar Guess it and apparently daddy couldn't do it. Nobody finally I went out there myself And I had to take the video you look at the trailer now I shot all that footage Yeah, because you're the owner Yeah, that's what you we should realize What are you gonna realize you can't divvy out everything? No, Matsuura could have done it I think we just should have asked mom. Oh, here's what you gotta you gotta get a camera guy You gotta get a video guy to do this. I got a couple guys you know a couple guys. No, Matsuura could have done it. I think we just should have asked Matsuura. No, here's what you gotta, you gotta get a camera guy.

You gotta get a video guy to do this. I got a couple guys. You know a couple guys. Yeah, yeah. We need to hire real like, like Andrew Schultz's sky, like that. That we send them off. We gotta get this video of the theater,

the people going in the theater, the people in the, just get real awesome behind the scenes footage. So we put it together. We need people in the just get real awesome behind the scenes footage. So we put it together. We know people in every city. Now that technically, because I'm in SAG, that makes me a producer. Robert. Robert.

But are you aware we bought two new cameras, Bill, give him the bandana. You're aware that we have two? No, I'm serious. I want to be a new in the underground now. We spent 30, I put two, two, $15,000 camera. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, look it. They're fantastic. I can't wait to see it. I want to see it. It's the village underground, right? Yeah, yeah, but these cameras are on right list. They're on both. Yeah, I mean, the reverse, like that reverse shot that we never had.

I'm sorry. Yeah, don't show me shot of it. It's so good. It's it's it's it's cinematic. Yeah. It's really is. Camers are as good as any camera. They're unbelievable.

Um, so here's the thing. This kid this thing becomes a hit. Can I get a little taste of who's going to be on it? Oh, we promote the show. Sure. You're comics. I got it all loaded up for you here. I'm here. You go.

All right. Here we go. See it. I don't know these people. All right. Let's see. Who's on this? You don't know these people?

Yeah. Wait. Ooh. J Train's on it. J Train. Yep. Jared Sreed. And then yeah, and his Netflix special is going to be out in August.

Yamaneca. Yamaneca. Oh, that's a great one. Zarna Garg, who, you know, everyone loves Zarna. And she has that special on Amazon. She's blowing up. Yeah. Ethan Simmons Patterson, who you can't find anywhere,

because he has no social media and it's infuriating. But is that the kid? So fucking funny. Who's like, so funny that he doesn't care about being funny? Yeah, it's like a nurse or something. He was a nurse. He quit to do stand up full time. Yeah, it's a very nice thing. He's like a nurse or something. He was a nurse, he quit to do stand up full time. Yeah, because fuck the sick,

oh shit, wow. Exactly. Fuck the sick told you about what I was trying to say. Let me say a wrap that around your neck and jerk off with you, fuck, pass out. I, I'm just the last couple of words. Jerk off what? I'm sorry.

Who, John Bishop? It was a Chris Cornell joke. John Bishop, who is from England. And, you know, if you're from England, you know, he literally is selling out arenas, like football, arena, I mean, killing it in England here. Like 50. Can't fucking do a side split of this. But he's the Russell Peters of America. Aaronovich, we spoke about Rich Aaronovich.

Rich, he's hosting. Yeah, he's hosting. We love Rich. I'll tellage, we spoke about Richard Aeronavage. Richard, he's hosting. Yeah, he's hosting. We love Richard. I'll tell you why he's a good pick on a host. His energy is jovial, very hilarious, and he's great on the fly. Yeah. If anything happens, but he keeps the energy up and great,

and if something does happen, he's fast enough to handle it. That's what I was back in the day when I had here. That's what I'm right now. Listen, let's go ahead and then Pat Bercher, Bercher, who's Canadian and is so funny. He's so funny. I think he has. I mean, this is the sounds like a JFL line. I mean, it's you guys have picked from everywhere. This is a who picked the people. You guys all picked it together. I would say that SD had a lot to do with putting the show together. No, I'm just fuming right now. I'm not going to look at it, but I bet the smoke coming through this years.

I do everything. Liz, I didn't think Liz was trying to say that Pat Bercher has a clip out now that has 70 million hits on Instagram. Yeah. Well, I'll tell you why the lineups great because you're hitting everybody around the world. I mean, it really is like, you know, everybody who's that you got women, you got race, you got Indian, you got black, you got white, you got English, you got fucking, who's the other one there? J train. J train, you got the fucking, you know, you got to keep it true to the Jews. I mean, come on. Get a Jew in there somehow. Yeah, you have to. Comment is not a comedy special if you don't have a funny Jew in there.

And he's, let me tell you something, he's one of the funniest young guys out there, right? He really is. He's killing it. Killing it. I love it. That's a great lineup. Yeah, that's a really good show. It's got to be a great show and people are going to go there.

And here's the thing, you might not know the people because they're not shi-pal. It's not holy shit famous people. It's not even the younger generation of like Shane who's like, you know, my God or Mark Norman, but those, all those people, killers. You're gonna leave wanting to know them and following them and all those. They're killers. Yes, what happened?

Bill, in a business, what happens if the internet goes down and the stream fails? Now you're asking? Now? I mean, this guy is just a negative... Let's put that out there, shall we? What? You have 48 movie theaters around the country. This is not a conversation for promoting your psych of happiness.

This is a conversation for you and Bill after. We're trying to sell the show. Now you've got everybody nervous that it might not happen. Why would you bring up a thing like this? Because he's crazy. I tell you, he's nuts. I'm not hearing it. Yeah, because we're not answering it on the podcast. What if a fucking lightning bolt? His bill's head right now. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here. I'm not here at the Comedy Cellar live, live streamed at a regal movie theater, r-e-g-movies.com,

near, hopefully, you. You're gonna go and you're gonna feel, you understand, when you see, when you go to a movie, a theater, and you're around people you don't know, much like when you're in a club setting, you are, you get scared, it's scary. It's scary to sit down next to people you don't know. It's scary to do something with, you know, in clubbers. And you

sit, all of a sudden stuff comes out. And it's scary to laugh at things that are inappropriate or that you didn't know were funny. And look around, everybody else is laughing. It's an exhilarating feeling to be an audience member. Because I remember it before I started calling, I'm on the first, I went to the first comedy show I ever went to was in an AA young people's convention. And I remember just sitting there like, what the fuck is, this is the craziest feeling I've ever felt.

And now you're bringing that back into a theater? Because let's face it, comedy suck at theaters. They're not funny, they're politically correct, they're worried about everything. There's not too many funny things out there right now you can see it in theater. But when you're bringing the seller line up an actual live show to, and everybody knows this,

comedy seller, every show sold out, we're talking 15 shows a night. On the weekend. On the Friday and Saturday night. And that's not because, you know, it's luck. That's because that's how good the shows are. You know what I'm saying? Chick-fil-A has a line out the fucking door because it's the best chicken sandwich in the world.

Everybody else has a chicken sandwich now. Everybody else went into chicken business, right? Because of Chick-fil-A. Everybody else went into the comedy business because of the comedy seller. And you started it. He picked it up from his father and Liz helped him and SD. And of course, I mean, me, I'm fucking murdering every time I go on the stage. Thanks, buddy. I kill it, but killing it, 20 something years here. Fucking little gods from him, little gods. Little gods, little gods. A brother. Yeah.

You're just saying, are you just thinking of good radio personality or are you actually, you actually think it's a good idea? I think both. I think both. If I'm being honest to be a good podcast person, little both. Well, no, I mean, it was good.

This white gnome is a psychopath. I mean, anybody else would be like, that was awesome. He just promoted my thing. Thank you. So good. We should use some of this. He goes, are you being honest? What?

You're a mental patient. You should be locked up. You know that, right? We're not wrapping up are we? With you, yeah, this is the way I live. Listen, my mother wants me in at sex. She tells me five. With you, we want to wrap you up in a little bit. So we're telling you yes right now. So by the time we do wrap up No, no, not right now. Why what else are you gonna say? What No, I want to ask. How many were you from? I'm kidding.

I'm from. And then in third grade, I want to ask you, there, there are a number of different values that we're trying to communicate. Did you take a public speaking course? What's all with the shit? No, go ahead. It's the, the Jew in me. Oh, yeah, this is Jewish thing right? Yeah, it is you know, it's like Italians great Great communicator just Seriously, thank you. No, what talk about something else besides we don't want that We talk about to go down on your show body. Let's talk about the US Socket team playing Vietnam the woman's you are soccer team playing the Vietnam men's team They just all look like dudes

Who won I bet I'll bet a million dollars that fucking six of those guys have peckas ladies of course we won we're America have peckas ladies of course we won we're America Americans I mean Americans saw the women the women the women are fucking awesome yeah they're you know I mean they're I mean they get what this is what I want to know since since you've been losing all this weight what what do you feel like coming back is just sex live drive different you feel? Like how does it change your psychologically? Well, I feel in life, my movement is non-existent now. Where before, every step I took, everything I did, it was like, oh God, now I flow through life. That's amazing.

I wake up, I go and I can do anything. Well, gone on Sunday was like, you know, let's go on this hike. And I remember a year ago, two years ago, I was going on a hike. Man, it fucking hurt. It killed me. And I did it. I did it as a fat man. I still did it.

I was running up the mountain. I ran and I was like, I had to hold myself back because you're not supposed to, when you hike, you have to hike my therapist and you should hike as slow as slow as person. That's what you're like. You're like the fucking self. This premenopause chick from every this pollock. Speed it up. But I was run.

I felt so I ran up the mountain and I was going, I felt 20 again. It's amazing. So the feeling I have, I'm telling you, but here's another thing that's back. Someone make a meme of that, please, please. Here's another thing that's back. And this is why life sucks. What's another thing that's back. I know. And this is why life sucks.

What's back, Abbi? What's back? The Peca Reca is back. The what? The Peca Reca. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, it's, while it's what it was,

which was nice. Right. Right. And, but my wife, you know, we're up at the tiny house, so there's no, I said to her the other day, go listen, can we have sex? She goes, we'll talk. I didn't ask if we had to take a second mortgage out.

No, no, no, I had a question, Robert. Why was it gone? Was it gone because you did too good about yourself? Was it gone because the toss roll was down because of the weight? Well, what happens? And this is a sad fact, when you get heavy, your pubis fat, where your pubes are,

you get fat there. And it's real, like your dick gets smaller, the bigger you get. There's just too much around it for it to be what it is. So when you lose that weight, yes, my testosterone is back. Yes, my stamina is back. Did you have that measure?

Did you have that measure? I'll tell you how I measured it because I used to be able to do this. I would have to do this to jerk off. Now it's this, look at this, this, this, and this, and of this. I'm so uncomfortable right now. Oh, I thought you met my penis.

I apologize. I thought you were going to stop you. What? Is this this and what? I can do this, this and this. Look at Liz's light now. I'm like, um, Bobby. Hires all the door guys in his place.

Oh. Hi, Bobby. Hi, who's that testosterone? What, well, I did get my, you know what testosterone is. It's a big word, but I can look it up. Well, I got my testosterone checked. This is what bothered me. And I actually left this doctor's thing.

I was at this thing, whatever it was called. The, you know, is all women. All women. And I went in one day and I was like, I want to get my testosterone checked. And she was like, why? Like kind of twa I was like, well, I heard that when you get older in your fifties, your testosterone is down. And it, you know, it goes down. And she goes, yeah, but that's what's supposed to have. I'm like, I, but I, you know, I heard it with memory

and, but she goes, that's not true. It really lied to me because she was, it, because she thought it was like an alpha male. Like I wanted more fucking testosterone and she's gonna help the world by not giving guys more. Like you're gonna make me more like my wife. I was like I felt like I'm gonna go fuck you. You don't need anywhere testosterone. You're good. You're good. I fuck look at that baby. I need it. Wow. I need it. You're good. Have you been working out? Yes. Well, I work out a lot.

I do weights and I walk and move a lot and punch the bag. I'm a punch the bag. But I want to get my testosterone checked again. Because look, if it's low, I want to get it back up there because it can help you move better, think better, and feel better. Do you take testosterone? No, no.

No, I don't take testosterone. Is your testosterone, have you got a checked? Yeah, I've got to check many, many times. What was it like a 35? It's in the normal range. It's always been in the normal range. But since I've been in the normal range. No more range for who?

For the first of my age. Okay. But since the pandemic where I stopped drinking almost completely and living more, more healthfully, it went up. Well, I'd like to get my check too because my sex drive is back. My energy's back. I think it might have went up from when it where it was. So I might not have to take it, but I think now that I'm living this life, I'll tell you what, if I don't work out, I get grumpy. Like I have to lift where,

I got a clang and bang like the rock. Or I get, I really, I get grumpy. As soon as I work out, it's gone. Can I tell you what I'm doing? I'm telling you, the sauna helped me out too. The sauna's awesome. You have a sauna. But they said there's health benefits to taking it anyway, but But it shrivels your balls I don't I don't want that then because I love my big balls My big balls of justice. You got big balls. Come on

We got they're completely average size Jewish balls. I got I like my my nuts. Do you like your nuts? No? I'm fine fine with them. Yeah, I like a big I like that old guy nut. Is that weird to say? No, I don't want yeah, they call you know what they call those what they call them tranny testicles. Oh, uh, transicles transicles. That's what they call the penis Yeah, I got him I got him. I mean you haven't made him laugh once. What's going on? It's no I'm just it's just thinking of the vault. How do you feel about norm? I Love no, how do you now if you if you had to take his father or no, I'm hold you What you know, there's ask me oh Oh, no, ask me. Okay, if you

Manie. Let's do it again. Ask me again. All right. Manie. Let me ask you to you this way. Yeah, that's because you're used to long. We would all love you. Wow. I hurt me. What? What? What? What? What? What? I know it was hurt. I was. I mean, it's just he said he just repeated. What was it? I don't have a father. Oh God. Really? I think I. So do you but you love Manny, right? I'm not in the loved Manny. I just I still love Bill. I love. He was was man he just just one day just I did know where he said thank you for bringing comedy into my life Wow, that was nice. It was it was so nice. That's awesome and but you know what? No, I said to you Thank you taking it out

Thanks for boring me with this story Thank you. I know kidding Come on, we gotta fuck around. No, he's not. But how did, No, I'm fucking murdering down here. Really? I feel like he's watching like Zeus.

I know, everything. Like the comedy fucking dog. He's judging. Really sucks. He's very judging. He's looking down at us too. It all does have, it all does have some good many stories.

You got one about the newsstand. He's got one about Bob Dylan. Both of them are the new stand. You got one of our Bob Dylan. Both of those are good. What's the Bob Dylan one? Bob Dylan. All right. So when I was in fourth grade, Bob Dylan. So I'm standing in the olive tree one afternoon.

It was like after lunch before dinner kind of dead. For people that don't know what it is, the olive tree is the restaurant above the comedy seller. It's part one. A lot the restaurant above the comedy seller. It's part one. A lot of people just think comedy seller. Comedy seller has an amazing restaurant upstairs from it where you can go a bar, hang out, they have live music upstairs. On Monday.

And they have Charlie Chaplin movies and Artwork. It's a very creative place. Late tables where you can draw with chalk. So I'm standing in the olive tree and this figure comes up the three little steps and it's, I recognize Bob Dylan and nobody goes over to talk to him. And so I take it upon myself and I go over and say, oh, hi, would you like a table? Would you like, goes, no, no, I'm good. Is Manny around?

I go, yeah, I'll be right back. And I run to the office. And those days, the office was, I mean, it was so supposed like the state room scene in the Marks Brothers movie, right? And I go back, nobody gets that reference. I mean, Jesus Christ. And then in 17, I thought it was a good idea.

I'm sorry. I mean, he did a Mark's brothers reference Just say it was small It was it was so small I couldn't fit my balls. Boom. There you go I know when you're going. We got it. Hey, we're working you. There you go So I go to the office and I say There you go. So, I go to the office and I say, uh, man, he, man, he, Bob Dylan is here and he's asking for you. And man, he rolls his eyes.

I go, you're rolling your eyes? Bob Dylan is here. He's asking for you and you're rolling your eyes. It goes, uh, every few years Dylan comes back. I go, why? He says he comes back to say, how do you like me now? Really? That's what I said, really. He goes, why? But why do you?

He goes, because I never used to put him on. I go, you never put Bob Dylan on stage? He goes, why should I put him on? He can't sing. He can't play the guitar. He can't play harmonica. What the fuck am I going gonna put him on for? I said, so why does he come back? He goes to rub my nose in it.

I go, well you better get out there and take your medicine and he goes out. And it was a very sweet yet vulnerable. It was like to see him talking with Dylan like this. It was like watching Muhammad Ali just pummel you into unconsciousness and but man he was so let it go out and say what I guess and what a Bob say Bob how are you yeah oh and how are things and all of that and Dylan knew that he was Bob Dylan right he was there just and and I said to mananny, afterwards I said, you know, everybody has got that guy

in the back of their mind, who never believed in him, and they always want to go back and say, you know, how do you like me now? Are you telling me? Yeah, I got, my guy's right on the TV right over there. Yeah. I said, are you telling me? That's him, that's my guy.

I'm gonna show up every 10 years after I don't make it, go, how do you telling me that's him? That's my guy. I'm gonna show up every 10 years After I don't make it and go, how do you like me now, no? Why so are you the only finished robber? Let him finish. I said so everybody And then in fourth grade I said are you telling me that everybody's got this guy in a bag of mine a good one That for Bob Dylan that guy is you. Yeah. Yeah, guys me.

I said, oh, Jesus, I won't live anymore. So, but that was, that would have been a much better ending. My part. Yeah, yeah, if we, it's all right, what do you think, though? I'm just saying. So that was the Bob Dylan story. I thought it was well told. I thought it was well told.

Don't let him fuck with you. He, listen, his little lover. Yes, sir. uh... so that that was the bob dillard story uh... i thought it was well told i thought it was well told all of the fuck where you he listen his little yes sir it doesn't matter if you thought you were funny what do you know uh... no

no his father first of all yeah who i love his father his father could know how to be a phone he can walk up to dilland go He could walk up to Dylan and go, hey, he walked up to me. Hi, Robert, how are you? No one doesn't have that ability. I walk up to, I walk up to no minute.

It looks like I just asked him if you wanted to, hey, would you like to play the shit? You know Stan, why does he have the, but he's not like me. And so he likes to try to try to hide that no no no tell the story where you and collar were in the hospital we did it by following the hospital oh Jesus Christ you know when his father was passing away for the group the core group of guys you know it was it was just sucked because we we had just hit this, I don't know, lottery where with those with us in this place,

we found a home, you know what I mean? I remember the second coming of the seller, because it was pretty dismal for a minute, you know? And all of a sudden, you know, you're sitting there with Manny and Ava and Estee and Colin and Gerardo and Norton and me and Patrice and Voss and And we were laughing and having such great nights and then all of a sudden that you know, it's this the guy who You know when you walked in the cellar you saw Manny at the back table. You're kind of like I cool. Let's go This is gonna be great. He's here and Now he's he's sick, you're kind of like, I cool, let's go. This is going to be great. He's here. And now he's, he's sick, you know, and it fucking sucked. And I remember going to the salary, we would all go together and, you know, when he was, you know, kind of dying. And I went out, I went into the hospital and, and column was, we went together. And

after this is when I was just becoming friends with Collins, who I mean, Colin Quinn's Colin Quinn. And we were kind of had like minds on certain things. And we were walking The column was we went together and after this is when I was just becoming friends with college who I mean calling Quinn's calling Quinn And we were kind of had like minds on certain things and we were walking home We're just had this he was let's walk from the hospital and he's side all the way to the west side where we both lived and As we're walking to talk about friendship and You know real friendship and and you know and real friendship and, you know, this great awesome conversation. He's like, let's go to dinner.

Let's go to, and I was like, I don't have money at the time. I really, I didn't have money to run, I can't really afford it. He goes, I got it, I got him paid for it. I go, come on, dude, I, you know, I don't, you don't want you to pay for it. I, he goes, no, I want to pay for it.

Let's go, let's go to this French restaurant on the corner? 57th and something. And we go in and we sit down and we're talking more. It's one of the epic nights in my life that, you know, I'm leaving this tragic thing with a man I really care about. And I'm with this other guy that I really care about. And we had this amazing night with this Colin Quinn.

And we had dinner and we're eating. And then he goes, I'm gonna go check out dessert shirt you want to start going nah I don't want to Zeret you go check it out and he goes over to the dessert which is in the front and I'm sitting there and I'm waiting and I'm just like wow this is great and I've said I'm waiting and I'm waiting and I'm waiting and I'm waiting I'm talking a good 40 minutes. Oh my God. He doesn't come back. Oh my God.

I'm calling his phone. He's not answering. From the pay phone. I'm fucking panicking. Oh my God. I'm panicking. Like I think he got abducted. I think he got mugged.

I think he's killed. He's something happened. He's in the basement. They took, and I can't keep calling. I keep calling. Finally picks up. It's probably 50 minutes, almost close to it out. They keep coming back to the table.

The chat, are you good? You want something else? No, I'm good. I pick up the phone. He goes, what's up? I go, where the fuck are you? What if he goes, I left. He starts laughing hysterically.

Hi, he's laughing. I don't know if I've ever heard call, where he's, you can hear he's buckled up laughing. I go, I don't have money. I don't have the money. I'm panicking. He's a laughing, well, what are you gonna do? He hangs up.

He hangs up. I'm like, I literally rage hit my head. I went, like I didn't know. And I call back. He picks up. He's cackling still. I'm like, I don't have fucking money to pay the bill. You fucking left me.

And he finally, he came back laughing hysterically and paid the fucking bill. I fucking hated him for months. It was the worst night of my. hysterically and I I I It was the worst night of my I mean he took this beautiful moment and made it one of the funny nights for his life And one of the funniest stories ever with Colin Quinn. Yeah, I find I mean he's a motherfucker that guy. God damn it But I have to go. I have to go. Yeah, we have to go to again. No, where are you going? You go on vacation again? I'm going to know what the comedy festival that's work. Are you going up to Montreal? Who are you going to see? Who you got your eye on? Whatever Liz tells me. That means nobody. He's

going to be miserable. No, we're going to. No, well, we have good dinner reservations the whole time. Okay. And we we're going to see all the new faces. No, but let's get breakfast when you come back, huh? Absolutely. We're going to go to Joe beef. We're going to go to Moistus. We're going to go to Benihana. Yeah, no, no, thanks to Tom Papa, right? Well, fucking Tom had Joe beef reservations on Wednesday.

I mean, he's fair in time. Why would he take us? Why? I don't know. Because who else is he going to go with? It's top of us. Steven Soderberger, Matt Damon or they're not as much real. There's no. Please. All right. Listen, have fun up there. No, congratulations on another another

Wait, an arm, another leg of the comedy seller, another thing coming to fruition, taking the comedy seller into the future and letting more people enjoy what you guys have created. Thank you. Let's see how it goes. Before you ended, I mentioned the bonus. The what? The bonus zoom.

I think it's a bonus. Oh, the bonus zoom. I see a lot of know. What the fuck that is. I don't know. A lot. That's disturbing. That's disturbing.

A lot. I'm going to show. I'm going know him. Let's talk. What what is the bonus zoom? What is that? The the bonus is zoom do you want to explain it Danny? You want me to explain it? No, he can't explain He has a icon and everybody say I'll explain so if you if you buy tickets to the the movie if you email your receipt of To bill at comedy seller.com He's gonna be doing a email your receipt of two bill at comedy seller.com. He's gonna be doing a Zoom with any comedy fans or people who wanna aspire and comedy writer is not comedy right.

Well, after this. We'll see. So we're gonna do a Zoom about how to succeed in the comedy business. So there you go. So, Danny, are you gonna be on that? I'm gonna watch it and earn hopefully. Let's, let me take some. I'll preview, huh? I'm gonna tell you right now Bill grunt fest started the comedy seller

Golden Globe winning writer. What'd you win the Golden Globe for? Mad about you three three time Emmy nominee for what? Lost every time Mad about you too. Mad about you. It doesn't matter You got nominated and you're writing for one of the greatest, one of the greatest shows at that time on ZB. Matt about you as a hilarious awesome show. Thank you. So you're talking about a guy who's been in the business on many levels for years and years and years. So we're talking 10,000 hours and plus with this guy. So he's doing a Q&A with Zoom, who people who buy tickets, you email that receipt to him,

he's gonna do a Zoom and you can go in and talk to him, ask him whatever questions you want. Make sure you have a lot of time because he's a long winded issue, okay? You know, it's not gonna be a 10 minute thing, okay? So listen, but one of the greats, and if it was for him, we wouldn't be here. We'd be where, the fucking strip. the fucking strip. We'd be a danger

feels with fuck would be danger fields. So there you go. All right, we got to wrap this up. Of course, Liz, I fucking love you. Thank you for doing this. No, I want to thank the boys. Boys. What do you got? You can follow me Max Marcus comedy all social media. Kill a little one. First of of all kill tonight at the pussy cat All right, well, go ahead. Joe. What do you got mozzarella the cheese show on YouTube? Just type in cheese show the first thing that comes up murdered tonight at the pussy cat all right Stop lying. Go ahead. Follow me at Danny breath on Instagram. He did good Okay, he did good all right. I. No, all three of these assholes,

I'm telling you right, how hot was that crowd tonight? And you know what it is, you just, you literally just gave them no props. You just blamed the crowd for being too good. Well, my cr, it's, you know, it's a lot of my fans going on. I know, that, I'm telling you.

Yeah. It's a little game changer, right? We're gonna stop doing it for like the last two weeks, right? Yeah, Colin's gonna, well, you know. But I get it back though in September. It's going to be more. But I'd like to end on a sour note. I got to do it. No need to fight it out. It's going to be like gladiator. I know. I want to see who wins. I know. I. I'll win. I'll be the one. I mean these days. Yeah, these days. Yeah, you really will. I will because if it's you against two stroke Keith. Yeah, Norton. Another one. Or yeah, heart attack Quinn. Come on. Quinn might Quinn has a little bite them though. Yeah, that's it. It's got my ear off. It's got some range. Is this too fast for you Bill? It's a little vertigo

but I'm enjoying it. And Bill, where can people get you on Instagram or what? No, I don't do any of that stuff. Alright, fuck it all. Listen, I'll be at that movie theater on the fifth if anyone wants to come and put me up. Give it one more time, one more plug. August 5th at Regal Cinemas across the eastern and central United States what's the website? What's the website? Who cares? Just fucking go.

What's the website? regmoves.com. Well, buy your tickets now. This will sell out. Because people are buying them. Yes. People are already buying them. I am.

But it's like it's 10 days out. Yeah. Yeah, because it goes what's going to happen. That's like, yeah, because it's gonna happen. It's the summer. People look at shit to do on Saturday night. This is a perfect date thing, huffin' a wife thing, bring your teenage kids to it, see some real,

to see the comedy show. That is, I guess. This is a great idea. You did it again, Bill. It's good to see you. And you're rubber. And Liz, I love you. I love you, no, I like you a lot.

Go to my, make sure you subscribe to this. Please hit the subscribe button. And go to my Patreon. Go to patreon.com, Sashrober Kelly. You guys have been watching these on YouTube and listening to For Free, For Not Then For Lugats. Wow. For months.

Go to my Patreon. Become a supporter for the year. Just go in. Five bucks a month. You go in you Support in the show you get the show free before anybody else you get to all kinds of extra stuff patreon.com slash robbercali if not just subscribe do that and go to my dates. I'm all over the god damn place Robbercali live and check me out on the bonfire on serious xm faction talk with my boy big jay ogerson and look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that.

You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that.

You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that.

You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. You're gonna have to look at that. No, some of the fan wrote that. Really? Sounds good, right? That's good. Yeah, that's my new shirt. It's coming out. Thank you, Adam. I love doing the show with having a blast. That's a good time. That's a good group. Check out Bonda Pick with Paul Verzi.

That show's blown up too, man. I haven't heard it yet. Oh my God, dude. You got to check out you. You should do an episode. Yeah, yeah, I love both of you. Oh, the best. We're the best.

We are the fucking, as Verzi said, fucking we're killing everybody. Doug, we're gonna fucking hurt everybody. Doug, the best podcast in the fucking god damn hell. No, you've been hanging out with Verzi. I think you pulled his shirt down because it's too tight. We'll see you guys next week on You Know What, Third Podcast. You've been listening to the YKWD Podcast.

Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Con Volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca, espectacularismos, lincones de película y un sincindia aventuras desperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de Madrid, Amurcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros. Volotea. Parifa sujetas a disponibilidad, consulta las condiciones en volotea.com