Robert Kelly's You Know What Dude! - Rich Big

Episode Date: October 24, 2016

This week on YKWD: Bobby is back from the True Story Tour! We have guests Mark Normand, Stavros Halkias, and Evan Williams! We do a breakdown of Evans legendary Roast Battle from the night before, which Bobby was a judge for! Watch / Listen and Enjoy!  RiotCast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Ya son casi las dos, nos vamos a ir a casa o hemos venido a jugar. A casa, a casa, nadie va a irse a casa. Hay que ponerse modo de racón. ¿Eres un dragón? Soy el dragón de Fireball. Ya te digo yo que las mejores historias siempre piezan con un chupito de Fireball. Bien, frío. Yo, pues al lío.

Un Fireball, sabes que la fiesta será épica. Ignite the night, con Fireball. Disfruta de sabes que la fiesta será épica. Ignite the night con fireball. Disfruta de un consumo responsable. 33 grados. ¿Yoros escuchar a Robert Kelly? ¿Y qué es, dude? En la network riotcast.com. ¡Verdad a la fiesta flotilla de la plana de Burris!

¡Es un costo de fiesta! ¡No hay que hacer no rujos! ¿Dónde es mi gas hall? to the funniest podcast on the planet Earth. This is gonna be a clush to fire. This podcast has no rules. Look at the mic asshole. I'm sure I've already said should I regret it? Can I get a microphone? No! That was trying to keep it like a comic ad. I have a bunch of guys on.

It's just us sitting down, and sometimes it's hilarious, sometimes it's 10 no topics, no directions. I love doing it. Way both sides of the coin. That's how it all holds the truth. That's doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it.

I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it.

I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it.

I love doing it. I love doing it. I love doing it. I love's true. You never fucking know. It could affect somebody's life. I've affected people's lives. Certainly. And probably in the bad way. A lot of times. What's up? I'm back. I'm on the fucker. Yay. All right. It's back. I'm back in the fucking saddle. Woo. Back in my seat. I'm fucking thrown. I'm fucking spaceship.

Yes. I've created. I've created. That's right. Captain fucking. Captain fat Kirk. I was going to say you said it. Captain Kirk now.

He has a hair. Because he has a wig too. Yeah, he does. I never noticed a little fang tooth you have. He has a weak tooth. I never noticed a little fang tooth you have. I like that. Oh, thank you. I had braces. Fucking gnar on a clip with. Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I'm excited to be back. I missed a show for last three weeks. I was on the road on the fucking tour with my my baby my honey pig

Never stopped being adorable. Yeah, you are cute. It is a pool picture. Oh, thank you with him coming out of the pool the shower Did you see the new one? No. Oh my god. Jumping into the pool. I don't think so. Mid-air. You're going to love it. Wow. That was a good one. A little bit creative to get with how you cover your genitals.

He didn't. He didn't this time. We're at Bailey J's house. It was a way bigger piece than that. Yeah. I remember she saw his dick and she went inside. She got jealous. She saw you on the circumcised.

One color nextick around. Your dick looked like it was burnt. Yeah. You got her on the tits though. Yeah. So, we're at her house and her husband, Matt, is a photographer, a photoke. And, yeah, I really love,

staffers does not give a fuck. Let me just, took his clothes off, but here's the thing, he was sitting by the pool, kind of thinking what he wants to do. And I'm like, are you gonna get naked or what? Like I'm a queen? Like, you're gonna get screwed up, Chubby. It's a thought.

He's like, yeah, I know, I will. I gotta figure out what I'm gonna do. And then, and then it was time, he's like, okay, cool, just takes everything off. Stand in there with his fucking mule out. Really? Yeah, you know. You know, he doesn't fucking give a shit.

But he didn't care so much it was artsy. Yes. You know what I mean? Like, firing. Yeah, it felt like I could, I could smell art in the air. Yeah. Like Andy Wall was gonna come in.

I like it. Right. He did his thing and we were, but then when he doesn't care, you know, it's like if a guy likes trannies, you know, you just don't care. Like if I had a friend that like trannies, like if I knew a guy, a little ball guy, skinny,

I was already a show in the morning. Yeah. He took another man's legacy. Um. And like, but he didn't care. And nobody, none of us cared either. You just take it, jump in the pool, canning ball,

and I gave him a little tip. I was like, dude, if you kind of put the knee up, then your nuts won't show. Yes. Other than that, you can have to do a little Photoshopping. Yeah, yeah. Right, the ball bag, I don't mind whipping out my shlong, but the ball bag is really where the,

that's where I get self-conscious. Really? Yeah, it's gross and hairy and lumpy and We're all about really yeah, yeah, oh man the balls are balls before dick you just look for Balls yeah, you got a top dick back and then you got to hang your balls out I think that's a funnier joke because they are grosser With guys, I guess I'm cool, but like if there's a girl around my ball bag. Oh, that'd be hilarious She sucked your balls before your dick

I like a nice ball pack like this a certain big sagging not almost where they can bounce their dick and their balls will go up Right Ball I don't know. I'll suck on a ball. All right. Let's settle down. You just give an opinion without everybody trying to rape her. I'm sorry, sorry. Lauren, you're not gonna hear a girl say I'll suck a ball. Hairless or hairy, you don't care. You're the hairless. Hairless.

Oh, really? I'm sorry, you asked your hair. That's all right. You guys look like two balls. Not as good as the tit-jump. All right, all right you guys look like two balls not as good as the tit joe swing it uh... we get starry baby here of course uh... my baby boom hello everyone who's fucking killing it on the road by way this

fox check yeah but you know he goes up and he's just annihilating with his horse yet i did not expect know it's bad. No, it's on the tour has been fucking great. I mean, a little nervous

because I, you know, we're doing some of these rock venues. We're doing one nighters and then we're going in for a club during the weekend. Every show was fucking great. Yeah. Every show was great.

Pittsburgh Wednesday, Erie, Thursday, Erie was fucking great. Yeah, every show was great Pittsburgh Wednesday Erie here is good. Erie was fucking. I thought Erie was gonna suck J.Rs Yeah, yeah Been there but bomb on my life really there packed it out One night and left. I think they changed hands over there. I don't know. It seems well run now I don't know how long you were there, but what a beautiful club a great gorgeous looking line history when we went in there I thought I was gonna suck deck. We were a beautiful club Gorgeous and we went in fucking packed it out with fans. I was it was we sold the shitload. Yeah, we have these

Tority shirts and posters and magnets sold the shitload took a bunch of photos. Yeah went back to the hotel and fucking bailed Yeah, what the drove to Cleveland the next day. Yeah, I really got to give it up for my fucking tour of agent and Bardow Mm-hmm Jim circle because it was so easy. Yeah, it was like two and a half hours three hours to the next gig So we wake up drive the next kid checking a hotel eat of course, right? eat, of course. Yeah. Which is we get it. We got to stop. Would you guys see everything? What did we? I really, I got it. I really picked the wrong fucking guy to talk with. I should have picked somebody who was like, yeah, just in shape. You should run Evan. Yeah. I eat like a piece of garbage, though, as well.

Oh, really? Yeah. Like half the time. I'm like half like half healthy half pieces shit. Yeah. So let's go around the room Let's introduce everybody scope. I'll introduce everybody and we'll get into this. I already do starving. Stop it baby. Of course that he got more Norman fresh off the garden last night. Hey, I'm gonna be here. How was that? The garden? Unreal. Oh my god. Yeah. That's incredible. It's pretty good, right? Oh my god. How do you have? It's pretty good right? Oh my god Second time so I was a lot looser. I wasn't as nervous and I could actually enjoy the first time I was freaking out I did it three times, but listen I felt the dip in the stage We did it in the round

But it was awful you know, I mean just the whole fucking thing 20 listen Who are you with? Dane. I did it with Dane twice, and then we did it. There was some New York comedy festival, Dane and Friends. And he had like, Burr was on it, I was on it. There was a bunch of motherfuckers on it. Yeah.

And we all went out and did like 10 minutes, which I actually liked that one the best, because everybody was going, I'm fucking annihilate. Yeah. And we all went out and did like 10 minutes, which I actually like that one the best, because everybody was fucking annihilate. Yeah. Nobody was fucking around on that show. Right. Right. And it was in the round, which is, have you done the round in like a big arena? Yeah. Yeah. Not 20. That mean like when you're in the middle and everybody's around you. Yeah. That's what that means. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. very good to rotate. You're used to in the corner. In the bar. In the linger mat.

In the lather part of the line up. In the creek. In the basement. In Rebecca. Oh! Look at that. That was too big. It was too big. Yeah, it was too big. It was a lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things.

A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things.

A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things.

A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. A lot of things. uh... uh... uh... so mark it will talk about that and who else do we got got uh... evid Williams fresh off his epic rose battle uh... he was the best one ever i was there i was one of the judges i mean the judges were great boss what do i do with the i'll do anything with boss

i really will i just mean him he's such a fucking moron i don't know he owns it he owns, but he always will have something to save him. Yes. He'll say something so stupid. You're like, what the, and then he'll say something so funny. Yeah. He like, Oh my God. He always. And of course, Ron Bennington. Oh, wow. Yeah. Amazing. I mean, just one of the funniest guys out there. Quick, fast, quick, no fat on it on the joke. Yeah. Everybody's eyebrows won up.

And then, of course, we had... Big J. No, no, no, Mike Lawrence. Yeah. Mike Lawrence is... Who has taken this to be a very serious job? Yeah, Mike Lawrence is who who who has Taken this to be a very serious job. Oh, yeah, yeah, it is not fuck around with Rose battle No, he's not fucking right if it was anybody else. I kind of be like all right relax Right fucking chill out with stand-ups. Right. This is a fucking side thing. We do for fun

But he really he has a whole thing about it. He really takes it serious. And I kind of, I kind of dig it with him. He was breaking down the jokes, why they were this and you do that. And he really knows what he's doing. So he kind of kept us all honest and then Big J, who, you know, Big J when he talks, it's like, just speed it up. Fuckin' we get it, you do drugs. You know, Patrice was your mentor.

Speed it up. Right, but- Get a haircut, you weirdo. Yeah. But when he does- I'm gonna die it. But he really did, Big J's like this. As soon as he's not talking like,

oh, just shut the fuck up. But then all of a sudden he'll say something. His shit was so fuckin' hilarious. Like it takes him a minute and then all of a sudden you're like, oh my god, that was really, he was really on point with some funny, funny psychology about what the fuck was going on. So Jay killed it too.

You were boss, I could tell you guys have been friends like a long time because you like know how to get to him. Like he was like trying to grab you or something. Like get your tiny hands away from him. I can just tell that he's like so conscious about his hands, could you say that? I'm just scared of it. I just tell these like so conscious about his hands could just say that. I'm afraid I was raped by a fucking Marionette when I was a young boy, but could have went puppet

when Marionette's funnier. Just for you, young guys, listen. Little more silver. Well, girls, on minorities. Oh, man. Gotta be diverse. Dude, so we're doing this fucking thing last night. I've done it before and it's funny,

but usually the ones leading up stink Or not stink, but just aren't as good and then I did it with you last time I had a fun time and then the last couple of the ones that are great, right? Yeah, the heavyweights Dude these fucking two assholes came up last night. Who was the other guy? Scott Chaplin. He's good He's good. I also funny comic very good. Yeah, it was one of the fucking most disturbing very good. It was one of the fucking most disturbing fucked up. And I've been on ONA with Patrice, Voss, Norton, Keith Robinson, and Patrice, and Colin Quinn, and Anthony. I mean, I've been in the round of fucking holy shit, mean shit said. This last night, mean shit I've ever heard. I mean, I was almost like, I gotta go.

I can't, this is affecting my child's karma. Like me laughing at this, this is gonna come up. This is my Billy Bush moment. Right, right. Somebody on Periscope called me Billy Bush. The people on Periscope are just like, like go mites and stuff and they think that they're like roast baddlers and so they're commenting like during the roast

battle and like congratulating themselves on how funny they are and that was the first thing they said they're like oh they gave it to Billy Bush that's great that's fantastic you see the word cuck a lot yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah what a Rachel slurs a Lewis was on it too we can't forget Lewis wow good old Lewis what is up everybody fuck everybody else, dude? Yeah, he's pretty good. What is fucking idiot?

He gets too high before the show. I know. So what happens is he goes up, he's, you know, flipping his dumb quarter, you know, you spent fucking 10 grand on some belt that you're giving away. You couldn't get a roast battle quarter. All right, let's go. Now, good to balloon.

And he's got a, he's, he, so somebody said something, I said something about the kid's chin. The kid a little really fucking, you're right, a favor, fucking dot chin. Oh, is that Patrick's rotor? That's your shoulder. I said somebody's fucking chin, right? And I knew when I, as soon as I said the word chin,

I know it's coming. And somebody over to my right, I think it was Mike Lawrence. I see Zach lean into Lewis and tell him a joke. Say something. Lewis is smiling. As he's doing that, Mike Lawrence says, how do you know about which chin would it be on you? We're gonna make some double chin joke or triple chin.

Obviously, it's coming. It's coming. It came big laugh. I left. Lewis says this literally right after, Yo, go triple chip. Obviously. It's coming. It's coming. It came big laugh. I left. Lewis Says this literally right after There's a big laugh as soon as the guy's out he goes, yeah, your chin, but it says the same joke He was like, I gotta give you Zach some credit. He just did a chin joke and you like told Zach's chin joke Right, right. Oh, he said you went off on him and the guy was so funny. So funny

Well, he's like, I'm like, you fucking more. He just did it. Did he? You're, you, this is a live event. You're here. You're the host. You're right. You're keeping us all together. Yeah, you're not making fucking appetizers.

Well, you know, you're not feeding us. He dresses like that. You're not fucking barbecuing with those. Sure. But yeah, but he was, he was funny too. And so you come up with this other dude. What's his name again? I forget it's got chaplains got who I've seen before is very funny. No one guy killer I'm really good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, I've seen him do the roast battle before. It's funny how comics all to go good

Dude. Yeah funny guy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What matters could dude funny guy matters if you just say good dude That's that means he's not funny. Right. It's true. Really good. Really good. Copa. Great guy. Great guy. Just nice. One of the best guys ever.

One of the best guys ever. We've ever met. What a sweetheart. Real fun. Real sweet. Yeah. How's the good family? That's a good job.

Great hair. Great hair. A strong citizen. Such a good hairline. So dude, these two fucking psychopaths and I know they're serial killers because they don't blink I mean they just got their fucking notes in front of them and they go at it and the I mean We're out of the gate now a lot of people come out and go you're a fucking dirty Jew blumbla and they just attack these guys had such great fucked up jokes about

the fucking just dead people in the other the worst thing ever happened to each other i totally totally it was so brilliant and then the end this fucking i'm the one who said look we need to do i voted for uh... but i wanted to i was having a lot of right i was like we need another joke

yeah we need one more joke and fight so they were like fine let's do one more joke so he does another joke and then this motherfucker now it he had a shot at his last joke he lays out a fucking song but he said if you did and you didn't do it right you're going down yeah yeah motherfucker lays out this song literally about the whole thing they just did

holy shit it was incredible he fucking lays it out it's the most hard shit hey Oh Look at that The last thing he needs is a kick That's why he's laughing at that. He's just tried to stick up with you in the house pretty funny. Good, good. You're the best. I love you, mom. He's kept me down the day so much and beat him up. She punched me.

We're at the, we're at a pumpkin thing for the kids. Uh-huh. Union, the dark. It wasn't the news yesterday. Yeah, it's awesome. Fun times. S-T-B-D-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R-R Yeah, it's awesome fun time I ran up to her because there's all these people around I went I got her fucking she started swinging Yeah, she started budget. Yeah, don't don't run

Her time in the Israeli army came back She's got to take me out like a Palestinian I can't make it so lucky now. This is so, thank you so much. This means a lot. Stope on everybody. Not you guys. No, no, no.

You can give a shit. You know what, he did it on my birthday? That's neat. Left me. Bob. We're on the road. We're going to a state dinner. Really fancy place.

I'm taking him on my birthday. He left me for a chubby red hat again. I can't. Yeah, again. Judy Gold. I thought we'd be. All right. All right. She's.

I'm very ashamed of myself. She's just tall. Hang on the mic. She knows the red hat. She's not the red hat. Right, James. Yeah. Not.

Wait, did you? Yeah. Not a tight one. If I get any fatter, I'll be her type. Is this going away? I did. You're not supposed to shake him. I we're gonna have him. Can we can I have can we eat this? Once a year. What is that? Once a year. I'm not gonna make it. Thank you guys. Thank you everybody. That's so nice. I drop the cake. So it a little bit like a cake. You drop the cake? Oh my god. It looks so good. Oh Delicious

Wow All right I'm gonna. I'm switching around like a wine connoisseur I'm gonna you know my emails. I'm gonna get to Fato stop eating on the microphone From fat guys because I'm just making them hungry Oh, look at that All right now this slice is what we get Bobby takes the All right now this slice is what we get and Bobby takes the rest.

Come on. All right. I'll buy that up in seven pieces. Let's go. We're sco-bo could take over the podcast for the next half hour. Yeah, we're just gonna struggle. I just got it. Can you cut it up, Baba?

Yeah, I just leave the camera on that. Oh my god. Cut some slices psych grab some slices. Come on. Come on. I have interviews. I have interviews because I This you can eat that She gives you some she can eat I Lauren just took my blueberries a spinach kale smoothie right away Literally I was trying Right now it's God you like it's eight minutes you got in there. Literally, I was trying. I was trying. Right now it's God. You look at this.

Eight minutes you got in there. Yeah, that's God. That's Jesus wants me to have a partner to stay fat. I think there's a role coming up. Wings and Providence as weekend. Wings and Providence? Well, we're gonna get wings aren't bad. We're gonna do wings.

Oh my God. Wings aren't bad. See that a lot of health food menus. Wing cake. Ow guys. Alright guys. Alright, thank you. Thank you, Baba. Thank you. So, see you tonight. So, oh my God, that was great. Thank you for recognizing my birthday. Not too many people did that I'm friends with. Happy birthday, man. I didn't expect you to I'm not you maybe you maybe a fucking twig probably here maybe a retweet sure nobody

called me nobody uh wow literally nobody come on I texted I texted you would have you heard I mean my friends like you know calling it's early that's early for comedy what are you talking about it was fucking last week ah, it was the eighth Shit, well didn't even desk he's late then Well, I wasn't here. Oh, okay. I didn't get I think it's shit Make sure you get one of those Reese's

Put that right down. Sorry, that just fell off So back to this dude you're doing this fucking roast battle. I gotta play a couple clips from it. Please. I'm not, look, I'm not, I don't really like, oh let's go, I don't have time in my life to go write fucking roast jokes. Yeah, it's just fun. Funn nothing.

It's crazy, yeah. But you guys who do and who take it serious when a really fucking kick ass, it is very entertaining. I mean, it's fucking funny. And when the people do, when you, when you can see somebody doesn't put the effort into it, it's a little like, ah, whatever.

But when somebody, you guys really put an effort into some, did you guys talk to each other? Did you guys work shit out together? No, we didn't work shit out together, but we talked and talked, you know, and I already knew the guy so well, he's like my best friend, you know, really? Yeah, yeah, so that's what it helped it to like when you battle somebody like a lot of people that don't understand roast battles are like, oh yeah, I've battled my enemy.

I hate them, so I'll just talk shit about them. Right. That would be horrible. Like the guy would hate that. It'd be like a weird animosity in the room, you know? Well, that's what you said that because a lot of the fans don't get that, the reason why when they come at you on You know, I'm just I'm just trying to be like you guys. Yeah, I'm friends with Norton Colin Keith

Yeah, and boss for 25 years you Yeah, that's why I can say fucking shitty little crappy scary hands Right, yeah, you know without offending him right some random douche that you don't know says some mean shit it hurts yeah yeah wouldn't be funny just be mean yeah yeah they don't really seem to get that fucking that uh thing the philosophy of yeah what funny is and why things are funny but right but you guys last night what fucking Jesus Christ brutal thanks man yeah anything he said can you be honest with me? Is there anything that he said that made your field a little bit? Well sting. That little sting? Not really man. I was like cuz there's just like we know each other

real well like you know I just you just assume people are gonna talk about your family you know if they've died and stuff and so I was ready for any of that stuff. Actually, like, actually if you watch a Dean Martin roast, no. Yeah. Actually, they never had any of that. I'm super. And they're very funny. Yeah. They're real funny, but they never go,

hey, Dean, I heard you a fucking daughter got ripped. Right. Right. You know what, funny is it? Yeah. Yeah. And then fucking Sammy, I did it.

Right. You know, it was just all funny, fun shit. Yeah. Funny Fuckin Sammy I did it It was just all funny fun shit. Yeah, but it's I told him one that it's gone to the point where you got it You got to do it you can't do you if you're doing fucking that shit you're done I mean it's got a point where you got to sing a song. I mean, I'm sure you got it. Yeah, that's good I got to bring something new. Yeah, yeah, well that was something that Jay big Jay pointed out is that the song wasn't until they asked for one or four joke. So I wasn't gonna do it. In my head I was like, I don't wanna come off like a gimmick.

I don't want the judges to be like, that doesn't count as a joke. That's why big J, again, he took 10 minutes to get to it. But once he got there, I thought that was so funny. I, um, the thing when you, I'm, yeah. Everybody's dialed in though, they're listening. I would tell you this, perfect closure though. I'm the thing when you Everybody's dialed in though they're listening. It was the perfect closer though. Hey, buddy Yeah, I want some cake. I'm so glad it went to that piece of cake. I'm good. Okay, buddy. All right, Tony

Tony But yeah about like would things hurt we talked afterwards on some stuff We didn't say about each other and those one that would have hurt him and he had one that would have hurt me. What was it? Well, I don't know what his joke was about. Just some of yours. Mine I guess him was I was gonna be like, you know, tell the joke but just tell what why I would hurt you. I'm about me. He was gonna say I'm like weak like like like you saying I would lost weight because that he knows that about me like I have this thing right I don't want to look little because I was a little kid and I got picked on a stuff so I like I go to the gym to try not be a little stop you for one Please stop you know how fucking disturbing that is I know I know it's a shit that was set about you

I know and the thing that would have most you emotionally connect to you Your looks I know I know it's fucked up man. It's real messed up. That is what was his was his the same thing type of Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh, this was about he has like a dented chest and I was going to comment on his death. That's actually disgusting. Yeah, I feel that. That's great. Fucking Chris Jericho. Yeah, he's fixed that.

He's just pooled there. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Big guy said his son, Cloward and his dad did when he hit his mom. That's all I was going to say. Oh, I didn't get to it. Yeah. I love the hit.

I love the hit. I love the hit. I love the hit. I love the hit. That's pretty fun totally. Yeah, if that concave chess was from a punch Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was thinking about right Um, that's great. Do we have what clip do we have yeah, I don't know I had the Dude, there was two back and forth literally but send it for a fucking half If I cue it up you're gonna hear it. That's why what are you talking about cursor on the line? Yeah, I don't know what's

All right back up Right there like one minute because he had one that was insane. I mean the whole battle my mom Really all things like what four minutes? I'm judging probably like 12 minutes. Yeah, yeah, and we did an extra so maybe like 15 honestly, so 12 of that is big J Getting that one joke. It was great joke though. Yeah, that was awesome big J so far you guys went right after you want to that That's the best part. I said you guys went right after each other. Yeah, there was no yeah, it's chappin J in sorry. Yeah, I mean sorry for fucking all right. Let's do this

Yeah, it's chappin' John right in. Sorry. Yeah, man. Sorry for fucking. All right, let's do this Okay, so back that one up like a minute a minute. Hey, oh, yeah, maybe 45 seconds Evan, you look so little I do love that you do these road have you been on the show for no man? That's great. You win you get some out winning these things That was cool man. That was really great. That's great. I woke up. All right. You ready let's came right here You guys done fucking computer weirdo I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it.

I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it.

I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it.

I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. I'm not gonna start fucking got it. the now he's in hell. You only... You only... You only... You only... You only only... You only only... You only only... The only angel in Scott's life is his sister, Shroovernaing.

Ah! That was brilliant jokes. That was great. Alright, well now I gotta change it up, because he was very rude. That was great. That was great. All right, well now I gotta change it up because he was very rude. Oh, my God. There we go, scumhead. The reason why I was like, oh, my God. That was close.

Happy birthday. Lay off me, I'm starving. The reason why I love this roast battle, because you can tell somebody's good at it, because he was like, oh shit, this cock sucker's coming out of the gate. Yeah, let me change what I was gonna start with. Which this fucking joke,

and it's that I'm going mean too. Right. Which, if you, if you're not funny enough, if you're not in it, you're not in it you're not gonna know you're just gonna do that whatever joke it is and you're fucking bomb right right you gotta adapt I love that I love that this guy did that I'm just pointing that out yeah yeah and I love that you started off kind of easy and then you oh yeah yeah yeah harder and harder it really heats up and our third

Joe our third Joe I don't know we're coming up on a second the third joke is winning let's go We're coming up on the second the third joke is winning Is there recovering alcohol? I'm just wondering for this well steps you took to recover slut. Oh, so fast. So fast. Woo! Yeah. Woo! Oh, shit. Woo! Oh, shit.

Woo! My mom loved me and passed. Your dad passed on love at Uscar. Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Oh, my god.

Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Oh, my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! That's dad was such a bad alcohol like the he actually ever started drinking. If all these guys dad was a comic. That's fucking a lot. That's why.

Oh my god. Fucking her boss laughing. And it's not like lifting weights after his mother and brother passed away, you know, fucking brothers dead too. You know what I'm just doing. Yeah, and now that he's starving, the name is the Smell of their corpses. Anyway. Well, the Smell of their betterotic. Um, I just wanted to do it. They were cooking it.

They just, they were just. They were pretty good at this one. I'm just... Ha! You just snort me fucking at it. Did you snort me fucking at it? Wow! That was great. I just wondered what you're... You're the gym and you do dance.

Do you call them momlets? Ha! Ha! You're the gym and you do fabulous. Do you call them momlets? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha everybody. Yes, sir. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell.

We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell.

We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. We're all going to hell. that i i i wanted to pick you so bad and i thought he said it what that's why i picked him i serious i swear to god you lose no i want it because of the last joke

i because of the lucky that i here's how fucked up is i thought he said it because i got fucked up yeah and that's why i picked them but you said it but if i didn't pick him you would have said it wouldn't have gone to a tiebreaker, and I wouldn't have done the song. Yeah. Boom, so you can thank me.

It's all you, man. It's all you, man. It's all you, man. It makes you be in stupids. It makes me be up when I say I'm in it. No, that's a good point. It is kind of tied up right now. It's kind of neck and neck.

Yeah, the banter back and forth. No pun intended. Dude, his banter was so great. I mean, when he said, dude, you snort your, that was quick, your family's ashes, that was amazing. The reason why this fucking stupid thing is going up and down is because we don't have to zoom in on this shot.

So I literally said, zoom in, she went, I don't know. Just being honest, man. Deeper really doesn't teach everything to me. I'm a YouTube at home. I can watch it. Yeah, where is this? On the stands, YouTube page. Go to the stands YouTube page and you can watch this clip in its entirety.

Hilarious. 28 minutes. Thank you. 28 minutes. Here we go. Oh, they're on the feet! Wow! That's quite the old Beijing. That's cool. Ah! That's for it! That's like shoutout! Who's that family's for you guys?

Well, I'm gonna give them that parachute baby. You want to thank them, I'm ready to do it. Let's go softer, because I didn't write that much about you. So let's play off, right? Let's play a little dude. This is actually true. This is actually a specific thing about having that's true. That is so sure that doctors, right?

Doctors thought that was his brother's life expectancy. He's not in there. He's in the brothers' death. She's not in the brothers' death. He's not in the brothers' death. OK. Jesus. OK.

Oh, god. Oh, god. Stop. This is Grambling. You look cut up with it. Stop right there. That's where I thought he got you a little bit like he started getting you because you were pausing.

Oh, no. I wanted to wait for the crowd to be, I wanted to give him all the life, you know. You're a fucking serial killer. I love it. Is either you were failing a motion or you were just dead inside. Yeah. That's the look you had. Yeah.

Was that for blood? Did it cause it his house? No, it didn't. That that for blood? Didn't close at his house. No. That's it. That's it. It was just a lead. Okay. Scott's closer. All right, very funny, guys. Scott's closer is about the Muppets and 9-11.

It's a genuinely good one. It's a pretty good job. And like the Muppets, the guy that made you was dead. And unlike 9-11, you'll never make a name tag on this scene. That was a go-up. Fucking. Nice 9-11 joke. Yeah, how's it worried about that, man?

I don't have two partners or anything else. I love the cops. the guy insulting the structure. Yeah, but you're fooling me. It's a bit rude. Yeah, it's a little rude. Yeah. Evan told me. Evan told me.

Evan does these battles, right? He'll do an impression of every person. He does. He's like, he wants me to act on stuff. He really wants me to act on stuff's told me a conference, but I'm so glad. So watch the last time we meet in the pool, Carol. I have three of them on me here at the start. Anyway, going to Sofah.

But Sofah, sadly, the only recovery role he's played is Paul Barrow and the family members on the board. Ha! That's a bad one. I mean, they're all so good. Yeah, that was a battle. And the crowd, great too, and the crowd too. That was great.

Fast forward to when they're doing it. You have fast forward over our critiques. Yeah, yeah. Also, I love you guys. You guys were putting each other over. You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. You wanted him to do as good as he could,

and he did the same thing that was still like, I'm not going to name names, but yeah, there's a couple of people in the tournament who like, you know, they're autistic or whatever. They just don't even blink at the other person. Like, you gotta laugh. You gotta like make it a fun thing.

That's why I liked it. That's what I was talking about. Like, the in-between stuff is what Christy cello has. Has the in-between stuff. The in-between stuff makes it fun for everybody. That's I think the essence of the old, the original Martin Rose, where there was the in between there was a means of it.

In between stuff is what fun. Once a name would fucking hit somebody or you know, it just made it for me more enjoyable. And I think she does it when they're just standing there reading like a serial killer. Yeah. And they don't even acknowledge a good one. Right. That's almost disrespectful. Oh yeah. And they don't even acknowledge a good one. Right. Yeah. That's almost disrespectful.

Oh, yeah. It's like you're fucking missing an opportunity. I mean, Kristi Cello, the other guy, who makes it a little funnier, but she was, her performance was better. And I think that's why you're like watching her. Did she win? She won.

Ooh. It was very close. It was close. That guy, the other guy probably should have won. If he had a little, he had one. In between. It was very close. That guy. I think I probably should have won if he had a little he had in between Little more personal The mass jug. Do you remember that? Oh, that was so good. What was it? It was a Christie such a devout Catholic that she goes to mass every Sunday and gains it every Monday

Yeah, they're Saturday Who's the comic It was walk Joe He was funny and he looked fucking like a shedrull. He should have dressed a little nom kidding Yeah, you got it I thought that was a good one. Yeah, it just wasn't as fast. Bring it home, Scott. It's gonna get a little weird down. I hope you're on board with this. Okay. I'm nervous. Are you ready? Scott, let's talk about that. Right there. You're super nervous. A song could bomb you.

And you're dead. And I lost my mom, my brother, and my aunt. So together, we're like one big horrible fucking family you know what I mean? I smell a sitcom. There's a story the day comes with us. There's husband being are they're very lovely kids? All of them head shitty jobs like a stripper. a sissor. Oh, the film, little one, kills pigs. Oh, there's a story of his father who had lost a couple members on his house. I didn't think that was him.

Well, I like Scott's dad he had to love them His The one day Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha He would raise them all the really outspour for my side. I'm gonna get a daughter. Alright, I'm gonna get a daughter. Oh my god. Holy shit. There you go. He's got spurious.

He's like, what is this? I'm like, I'm fucked now. But literally, Bic-J, what you say? Like, you almost didn't do that? Right. That was the one. You just did it in the pocket. It's fucking crazy. Dude, to your night, a crowd in song at a roast battle. That was so happy they joined in. That would have been so bad.

I was like, come on, everybody, and then just sing it alone. That would have been horrible. But the pacing of it was perfect too, because Lewis comes up and then you whiten your fucking, you hit that. It was the timing of who was fucking. Yeah, wow. People tell me they're like, I don't know if you should hit that. It was the timing of who was fucking. Yeah, yeah.

Wow. People told me they're like, I don't know if you should do that. And then like Eli Sayers was like, you have to do it. He's a very funny, he's a great wrestler. Super good. It's crazy to be lost in the first round. Those two people shouldn't have gone against each other. Him and Patrick Schroeder.

But yeah, he was like, you gotta do it. He was like, and he's like, I think it's funny if you, when you keep going. Like, because people don't think you're gonna keep going, it's gonna be ridiculous that you're still going. Yes. Yeah, and he's, I think it's funny if you, when you keep going, like, because people don't think you're gonna keep going, it's gonna be ridiculous that you're still going. Yeah. Yeah.

And that's just funny. Funny. Funny. Funny. Funny. I was, I mean, we were hysterically laughable. Yeah. Cause we were saying shit to everybody the whole, we were trashin, you know, we didn't really

talk at all. It was so funny. We were just laughing. Yeah. Wow. I mean, that means so much. You think, my favorite part is that he's still a, he started blessing us with Holy One.

I was doing it each other. It was such a fucking reticulous thing. I mean, and the fact that they're really dead, they're all dead. They're all dead. Yeah. Yeah. I'll never see this.

Yeah. No, no, no. Unfortunately, no. Oh, fucking a bravo motherfucker. Thanks man. I mean that's a that that's what a rose battle Awesome, and I felt bad for the next people that had a come on. Oh, it was cats, right? No was Patrick Schroeder and Zach Amiko, okay, and you know what they pulled out of it though They did they it was tougher first Yeah, and they addressed it and like Patrick was like thanks Evan like after one day

And then they crawled out and they killed by the end dude They did because they did something a little they did it different. Yeah, Jack is funny man Jack really yeah, he had my favorite joke of last week, which was he was up against the girl with a needing disorder And he goes no one do you fuck somebody black guys black guys love ribs? Great And he goes no one do you fuck somebody black guys black guys love ribs? Great Yeah, he was really fucking great Yeah, that's great and and Louis cast was fun too at the end Louis cast did it. Yeah, yeah I think a bonus round he had a bone it had nothing to do with the tournament

Who do you go with kind of like a chaser and the old no guard? Oh the Jews? Yeah, Louis one was very Joey Wow, yes, I was very even boss was like it's Joey I had a lot of fun man and it was fast it wasn't too long sometimes that chicken drag on yeah, I was actually really fun Everybody but everybody was good, but that one that was the best it's the best thing I've ever seen I wish and the fact that it wasn't on television yeah I mean dude you could have you would have been famous after that yeah now you just got to go back to the spots yeah yeah yeah yeah open mics and stuff coming out open mind where are you from man

I know with Carolina originally man and no shit and what nationality you chairman yeah yeah German Irish and Welsh. Yeah. Yeah, I'm just white. Yeah. Just all the white stuff. And if you're a little dude, but you got picked on a lot?

Yeah, I was just, I mean, I'm like five, seven now. I was like, I was so short and tiny. And so my grandpa taught me pushups, and I just kept doing them. Really? And, you know. Did you do pushups on an estimate while he was naked? Yeah. but told me push ups and I just kept doing them really and uh... you know uh... on the stomach will use naked ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha okay, yeah, tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and tons and you know, but I talked to the guy and I was a big pussy hound at the time. Yeah. As a look, if you go there, you're going to be trying to get your deck sucked by all the

drug addicts and alcohols. If you, if you really want to get sober, you should go to this one. Yeah. It's all dudes and it's for a year. That was a year. So I really smart of that person. Yeah. Now he's gay.

I have a son woman uh... yeah no uh... yeah it was good how long we how long we were in a rehab for just twenty eight days and there were relapses after that and stuff and then just uh... yeah i went in the program oh good for you how long you been around uh... eight years on the thirty first no shit i don't

don't tell that right one day at a time. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The work is gonna be working. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No gray areas. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think they've gotten any years putting your man. Yeah. Yeah. Um, that's good, man. How old are you? I'm 27. 27. Yeah. Yeah.

And you've been in New York for how long? For five years. Five years. Yeah. Yeah. And now this rose, New York for how long? For five years. Five years. Yeah. And now this rose. Now is this a I don't know what's on asshole, but is this like a Fluke that you did this great or is or is you do you always kick ass? He always kills it You know who I'm on the feet it but I'm asking I don't want a brag I don't want a brag I don't want to brag. I don't want to brag. I don't want to brag. I was trying to try and get it. I'm getting it. I'm going to say something. Is he is he just fucking kill

it all the time? Kills it every time. I've only seen you three times, maybe, but the one with each one was a killer. Yeah, the Christie woman's really good. Oh, thank you, man. Yeah. But you smacked Chrissy Chellow. You smashed her. Yeah, I mean, she was great, though. She was really, she's like, like you said, like the in between several her, like she's so talk about like wrestling terms, like she sells it, she puts you over, she just like she buckles and like just stumbles around stage of something's funny. You know, she is doing everything, like her signature things that I love, she'll go up so scared, like in the middle, she always kills, and then she'll say like if she does a big

joke that kills, she'll go go can we end it now? You're the iron actor You do your Pablo Well, it's just the movie boys. Oh, man one desire that guy, you you know but I can't do that I'm a kid should of course you can't we'll call you a hack the crowd would love it though yeah probably sensual come up to you the fucking house of the bridge truck drop off fucking ten million hey he's doing his real right what is who the fuck got this coffee almost made me throw up that's bad uh... what is it it's seven eleven coffee. Why would you get me 7-11 ice coffee?

It's in the corner closed and I was in the press for time. Wait a minute. Fucking the coffee bean? They're closed for a... The coffee bean? This is not closed down. You got a thing going. What do you do? You're derailing this with a coffee jam. Because the back of my tongue tastes like fucking... That's from that rehab. Can I get me a new one? Yeah. Get the hey, hey, Mark, I got the show All right, I know what the listeners want Okay, all right, side tracking is fun Okay

Some guy might have had a change something Maybe do something in the car We gave him a little shot They have a little break, now we're back All right, all right, thanks, go Yeah, give it up for fucking Il, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, E, Why do you do it if you're not going to use it in your act? I started as an impressionist guy. What do you mean impressionist guy? What did you do?

What was your first impression? I was doing movie movies. Okay, fuck heck, who cares? I'll tell you this. I'll be on a senior's all. I'll be on a senior's all. You know what I love? Magic and impressions.

Okay, if someone can do an impression good, I fucking love it. Do I want to follow you? No, I will fire you. Get you the fuck out. I'll tell you to take your guitar and your impressions. And love it. Do I want to follow you? No, I will fire you Get you the fuck out. Tell you take your guitar and your impressions and beat it. Yeah If I was just sitting at club and saw you I really got it was pretty good So your first one was movie guy. All right do do movie guy for YKWD do one for YKWD. Yeah, oh boy. I really don't spot here one man One cake Yeah, boy, I really want to talk about here. One man, one cake.

Now no cake, one man. It's his birthday and he has Stavros, who's not naked. Everybody tune in. Do you know what, dude? So that would be like, you know, that would be like a little. Sound like a movie guy. Right, right. If he had a cold.

Yeah. He smoked a lot of cigarettes. What, what, what, what, what was your other one? Well, I did, like, a cat williams. Oh, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I used to do, I had this bit on sound doing it anymore, but I had this bit where I was like,

here's my impression of cat williams at Burger King. And I'm just like, can I get a whopper? I'm like, I'm really bad at impressions. I'm sorry. You know what? Here's another impression. Here's an impression of my dad. Just draws me, sounds just like him.

Disciplining me as a child for not doing my chores. And I'm like, never in the history of Fala Timber. I've seen something so goddamn ignorant. If I wanted to just sprinkle some marijuana and file your face, I guarantee to try to be done in 30 seconds. Libya goddamn life and do that. I just do like that. Oh my god. Oh my god. I'm not gonna applaud because that's

fun. That was fucking great. Oh, yeah. What else you got? I love it. Why would somebody like? I mean look, I get it that people want you to tell jokes out of punch tag and be blah blah, but that is fucking great. That's really good. What else you got in the can I don't have any jokes written for stuff I just want to hear boy. I love it. I really do like it like magic I love my sleight of hand A nice fucking What else you got? Jason Stuytham's really easy to do

He just called a voice We will know And he can't sound like you're intimidating. And it'll perhaps like a little mouse. I'm sure it's like a day today. Can you pick up Lauren as Jason's dad and Cat Williams? Wait, what's that? Cat Williams, Jason's fighting over Lauren.

Yeah. He's over her. Huge pussy. So you don't understand, Pablo, all right? I'll'll get a little voice as you can do you have no idea What I can do my tongue it that fucking twat This summer Lawrence pussy Some cat in there

Jay never seen a dick like mine before I swear to god I'm gonna open it up There you go. There you go. There's some cat in there. There's some cat in there. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go.

There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. I love it. I Bring it back into the act. I don't know if it's if I can do it in a tasteful way. I'll do it, you know, yeah Well look dude. I think you know look a guy who goes up and does impressions and first of all isn't good Thanks and number two Who's the rich little? I

Don't I everybody was all up as asked how good he was. I don't think he's that good. Now he had a couple He had a good Carson. That was it. I was. Yeah, but anybody could fucking do Carson really. Yeah, I mean Carson's like, you know, singing journey Everybody thinks they can do it. Don't stop Believe and hold on to that Feel Yeah Light and people Well, you're almost everyone No, I think I think you stunk do you got him? Yeah. Yeah. All right. Here's his impressions. I think he's stunk. Look at it. Two million hits. Oh, that's what happens I don't even know this guy. He was a value impression guy. Boy, here we go. Ready?

That you have done. Oh! It's so little. Regis, who is Dean Martin? You know, I've been doing impressions for a long, long, long time. And I think the key to staying on top is to keep your act fresh, to come up with new people all the time. People like Dr. Phil. I know that you know that I know that you know. And if you knew that I knew that, then we both would know.

If you want to fuck up, give a wrap. I knew that, then we both would know if... What? Fuck up, do the laugh. I don't get it. Boo. I want to fucking smash them. Right. I really want to fucking punch middle America

right in the face, be yapping at that. If I knew, that you knew. I just didn't watch. I just didn't. If I knew, that you knew, and I knew, that we both know what we knew when we know it. We got that commercial message. Of course it's good because it stinks. Anyone could do it.

What else is he's got? Oh. What is he's talking about? It's killing. It's killing. It's killing. Now, I've done a lot of politicians over the years. Nixon, we get people like Reagan. Like Bill Clinton, who wrote me a lot of great material.

And George W. Bush, out on the fly of the American people are picking on me. Right. Until he just did George Bush, I didn't realize he was even doing Bill Clinton before that. But when you do Bill Clinton, you gotta probably bring your water out. I wouldn't fuck Hillary with your dick. Damn.

And then I don't know why people are fucking messing with me here. My dad was president. I'm president. Goddamn, we're going to make this because you're good again. And vote for fuck. I can do all this shit

Get me on the fucking tonight's show her pussy's bigger than fucking cat lambs is dick Put a cat you put your dick in there. It's gonna go just like any other packer I haven't done anything. LAUGHTER APPLAUSE It's good. He think you will vote for him. My favorite, my favorite politician by far, was always Ronald Reagan. APPLAUSE

I like it. He's like, I'm very current up to date. Yeah. Here's my Reagan. LAUGHTER I'm a... LAUGHTER Here's my Reagan Who the hell are you No, sorry who the hell are you I can do it buddy. I'm right here What am I am I a fucking genius now? Who the hell are you? Fuck him

Also, it doesn't bowd well. He has to tell us who it is before he does it Yeah, just do it if it's that good. Well, no, no because you wouldn't know I know so he's doing a southern guy and then some guy with a raspy voice Who the hell are you? Yeah, well, uh fuck off. Yeah fucking phonies. He has never done them good This fucking young this young fucking whipper snapper male female face This angel German god

and God. This is it. Hitler you. Aaron dream. What the world should have been. Oh God, fuck it. I don't want to hear anymore. I mean, he's just, I just never got him. And I'm sitting there going, this guy is the impressioner.

This is the guy that comes out and uh... this is the guy that all you guys who do impressions are supposed to look up to who's the guy who doesn't precious that you are is your man a guy with Pablo yeah i watch Pablo and i was like oh i can do a lot of those i should do comedy that was like the first yeah i was like eleven and i was like i should do that that sucks and that's how easy that thought was you know what i mean it should be harder you should know that it's harder than looking at but you're a fucking cat with you and you do any of the black comics do anybody else que me pensaba que era más difícil que lo que hiciste. Pero ¿casi es una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de una catedrala de catedrala to put in that. I can't even fuck it. Yeah. I live in the mom one, none of me lives.

I'm blessed. I'm blessed. I'm blessed. I'm blessed. Do impressions. I'm blessed. Do impressions. I'm blessed.

Do impressions. I'm blessed. Do impressions. I'm blessed. Do impressions. Do impressions. Do impressions. Do impressions.

Do impressions. Do impressions. Do impressions. Do impressions. Do heroin instead of eating all my food. I got a big CD every time he shows up before. He's quiet, right? Oh, that's good man. Guys, pump a nickel. Take over glasses, do a bobby.

Just sit there. All right. All right. Well, dude, that's pretty great. I mean, look, I wouldn't, I mean, I don't think there's any fucking, there's no place in this business anymore for impressions. Stand up is become, I'll tell you why, stand up so oversaturated. Yeah, SNL, yeah, if you get honest and out, absolutely.

You need them to get in the door and kind of do something that's relevant at the time, but I mean You know, I mean if you're not doing a thing. I mean what are you gonna go in with cat waves? Which man doing it black? You might only be able to salon dot com articles are written if they had a sketch with a white guy doing cat That would they wouldn't do that. Yeah Frank Ali endos does a well the sports guys that's how he yeah but where is Frank you know where is five rich somewhere he shows up on his piano I know that I mean yeah Frank is definitely rich he's got money I mean he's a funny motherfucker and he does great but I mean him and who else

uh-huh pop well I guess but who does pop well do I mean well there's a movie guy yeah jfero who's a movie guy. Yeah. J. Farrow. Who's that? The guy from SNL, the black guy from SNL, he does like so many things. He's real good. But again, what do you, you, you're using him as funny clips on, you know, Hollywood tonight, just as a segue into right. Yeah. Something else you're doing. You know, like, it's almost like a trick a trick. Right. It's almost like magic. Like an actor that knows magic tricks. Yeah.

Yeah. Right. It's like, yeah, I heard you did a little magic. What's this behind your ear? That was a nickel. Yeah. Does it get chicks? Like, could you get girls with impression?

No. I mean, I have a wife, so it wouldn't even matter. Are you married? I'm married. How long have you been married? I have her six years. Oh, really? Oh, I don't remember, yeah.

Is she's recovering too? No, no, she's a normal person. I got one too. In that crazy, yeah. Is it a furiating? A little bit, yeah. Just have a bite of a cake and push it away. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I can have a sip of wine. A sip of wine. A waist wine. Well, the joint every three years. It's doing, yeah. Yeah. You regret everything you've done? Where, what does she do?

Can I add you mine? No, that's mine. She's an interpreter. She's from Mexico originally, so? Can I, you mind? No, I'm fine. She's an interpreter. She's from Mexico originally, so she's... You married a Mexican? You're a Mexican? She's a vote for Trump?

Yeah, very far from it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She's from Mexico. She's a Spanish interpreter, like, it's both some stuff. Now is she, is she look wise? Is she look Mexican? Or does she look American Mexican?

Oh, she looks... She's totally Mexican. Yeah, some people think that she's like a Filipino. So she has kind of a Asian look It's a sexy look. She's pretty hot. Mexicans don't get enough credit in this Spanish world Just put a reekens always get the hot. Well, yeah, they got that spaniato Dip some of that in there A little taller and a little lighter And they're American game a little booty right so that backass I fucked a Puerto Rican chick recently the body is unbelievable. It's crazy I'm Puerto can have Jews so she was a body and quiet

Amazing wow, that's great. Yeah, she wasn't heckling you What's up, so you've been married for how long? I six years yeah, see you guys live in New York, New York Yeah, man Spanish Harlem. We just moved to Spanish Harlem of course Deal we live in Queens, East Side and our Spanish Harlem We're gonna look at that. So now when you're up there with her they must be like what the fuck? Yeah, it's so much stuff to you know Spanish a little bit a little bit. Yeah So you have another yeah, well, I mean obviously yeah her dad is just like three things He's just like he's good like if you do

If you do if you ask him anything, it's like how anything you know, you'll be here. I'm going to be you. Okay, ready? Yeah. Yeah. How was the, how was the plane right here? It is good. It's good. Well, you want one more for dinner. You check in. It's cool. Check in. No, he's fine. All right. Fine. All right. He's whatever. Ork, you want pork? He's good. He's good. What about steak? Well, do some steaks. He's good. Okay. He just said. That about steak? We'll do some steaks. He's good. He's good.

He just said this. I'm good. We want to go to a movie later. He's fine. All right. Fine. He's got two phrases, man. I love him so much.

How do you like Trump? He's good. He's good. No, no, Tony. All right. We're going to take a break real quick. I'm going to get back to you. I don't want to get to you.

How about this big thing? We're going to half out left to the show. on about this uh... this big thing we're gonna have a left of the show real quick uh... attention fantasy football uh... league commissioners it's time to restore the position of commissioner to its former glory by giving the people what they want a fresh start with the new leagues feature at draft kings dot com you can play one week private

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and start a new league that's crazy illegal you guys can just just pick a whole new team. In the middle of the freaking season, how crazy is that? Draft Kings, great sponsor. I wanna thank Ili for giving us this free,

it's actually pretty good. And right now I want you guys to go to robacoelive.com, find out what we're playing and support the true story to our me and StarVarosa. Come, we got a bunch of cities left. This is Providence this week. If you're're fucking listen to the show if you live near providence can etiquette massachusetts and you listen to spaghett of fuck down there next week regard them uh... friday

and saturday night so make sure you pack that place out with doing four shows four shows only with some of the t-shirts to do all this merch we got a all these fucking great posters uh... we have the the step in repeat came in nice that's right eighty feet bit only with selling the t-shirt to do all this merch we got all these fucking great posters we have the the stepping repeat came in nice that's right 80 feet big so big and the last button is sponsoring this tour I want to thank the guys who are at lap button mat for getting behind us on this so and this is the t-shirt right

here this is the that's the t-shirt right there. And then the back of it is right here. I don't know how to show people. There it is right there. That's the tit. And, uh, the back is fucking back. Take our word for it. The back is fucking great. Look at that. Hey, nice. That's awesome. Right. We have we need to move it right. We need to move it right. All the fucking tour dates and all that shit's on there. So there you go. What else do we get? Oh, oh, become a premium member. I'm telling you right now, I just put up we have the live show.

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$199 a month, you don't even know it comes out of your fucking account. It just happens. It's awesome. You're supporting us. It's for nothing. Basically. And what do you get?

We get creeps with kids. The video's up there. The whole show. You get to watch it. Great show. One of the best live shows I've ever been a part of. Ron Bennington by name of farland Jim Florentine myself Lewis Gomez it was crazy and then Keith Robinson did a set nice I mean come on and then I just put up me and Starvost were down there with Bailey J and

her husband we did a in prompt to podcast that's up there for premium members only we'll be doing that stuff on the road a lot of shit's going up on that join right now joint today download the app and become a member of the premium ykw did what else we got just gonna stop this really quick and i'm gonna start back up just so we can what we just have to go live really quick i'm just gonna stop stop right now we'll

be back in two seconds. We're we're back. Okay. Sorry about that. We had some technical difficulties. Uh, Deepo was out today and Lauren is taken over and she's not used to it. But she worked through it. Deepo helped us out. Hopefully we are back. Who the fuck knows? Um, so anyways anyways Very interesting first hour This coffee is mind-bogglingly bad I'd literally I'd rather Pumpkin chillers get me fucking almond. Why would you even get flavored?

But I'm taking why would you get flavored? That's old they had why won't you not get it? Why would you get flavored? That's all they had. Why won't you not get it? Because I had to have it in the garage. How do you go from fucking... That's like saying I want to cheese pizza. I get to cheese pizza every fucking week. And then one day they say we don't have cheese pizza.

But we have fucking goat cheese buffalo chicken pizza. Oh, let me try that. That does sound pretty good. I'm sorry. Do you have a goat cheese ball? It's full, I thought you prefer flavor. But here comes SD. I don't ever like flavored coffee.

Yeah. He's a large cold brew, one splendid little bit of cream. You know what he, that's it, right? Get the large part. Not even the cream, just black, little bit of sugar. No, he's talking about mine. Oh, yours, okay. Selfish cocks, I don't know.

He's about me, you're really gonna make it You're really going to make it in this business. Yeah. Speaking of making in this business. Uh-huh. Stick to your acting. Your boss. Yeah. You're fucking you. Your boss. Yeah. How is how is it working for your boss? How is it waiting to be told we had a sit on the jet? He does do that. Of course he does. I know. I was on the tour dane. I get it.

That's the name of the tour. Sit here. Yeah, we should start a tour called the second fiddle tour. He's not a fiddle. He's not even in the band. He's a poor but yellow. What's up? So you're in Tampa. Yeah, we've been on this arena tour. We did Atlanta, we did LA, Arizona, we did Tampa the last night of the day. Now you guys have a ton of people on like when I did it with Dan, it was me and him and Al Dumbani, that's it. There was literally four of us on a fucking 18 seat G5. Yeah. And but you she carries a lot of people with her.

She has she's got a ton of motherfuckers with her. Who are all these people? She has a three band jazz group It's her brother and his two friends. Oh shit. Yeah, that's great They go on first which I love because the people filing in so they kill all that time Yeah, and then me and then her and then she's got like a makeup chick a wardrobe chick and and then her and then she's got like a makeup chick, a wardrobe chick, and a manager, like a road manager. So there's a lot of money in it, right? No, no, no.

Or she just doesn't do it anymore? No, I think something, I don't know. She's like doing her own thing now. Doing her, like she's working. She's has a job. She has a job. Oh really? She's doing comedy.

No, no. Wasn't like a break up, was it a break up? No, no, I think she just got a gig. They're good. They're good. They're good, yeah. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, so, um... So there's a lot of us and we've just been jumping around and she's so generous, she's so extravagant, like it's jet with sushi and then you get to a ritz and then you stay there for a couple hours and you go in a limo to the gig, it's insane. Right, yeah.

And she's the same thing. We did the ritz in the four seasons. Yes. Which I hate. I'd rather stay in a cool boutique hotel that has, it's a contemporary, new shit. I don't want to stay somewhere where we're fucking some old white couple likes, you know, like some fucking antique furniture and you know, some brass bedding shit from my shoe. Go fuck yourself. I don't want to shoe horn in my fucking room. It's a little square in there at the bar too. You go down there

like the fiddle and shit. I like these new boutico towels. They're here. They're sexy as shit. They got great rooms. And the restaurants fucking awesome. But, you know, who am I? Yeah, I'm standing at a fucking holiday and express because it's better than holiday. And me and him stated a holiday in on the road. It was so bad.

Yeah, man. I mean, I got photos of it. If you clean the, the reason why they don't clean the wall in the bathroom, the paint will come off. Oh man. Yeah. It's just what it got. It was fucking terrible.

Wow. I called up, I called up everybody. I was like, are you fucking trying to murder me? Yeah. Like there was mold in the bathroom. Yeah. Jesus. The ceiling was falling.

Couldn't shut the door. The whole building. Yeah. Couldn't shut the outside, the building shunks of cement were missing. What? Like somebody got hurt, like somebody's dead. Yeah.

It looked like the building was in like the apocalypse. Right, a superhero movie, like Batman through Superman through it. All that. Yeah. Yeah. The me and Mike did one, we did some stuff in LA and San Diego.

We stayed in this hotel in LA and it was like a hostel like the the bathroom is not in your room It's like the whole Buddy I'm on me Stand I shouldn't you okay Offstage I don't offstage offstage So you're on the road you're in Tampa or in Tampa. You go up first. Yeah, right? And then who goes up after you Rachel no, right was just me is some Rachel's sometimes there not always there, right? Okay, now when she's there are you there Yes, okay, so would you go up first and then Rachel Rachel then me Rachel then you cuz she doesn't want to fucking have to follow you

I think it's too. I don't think she wants to women in a row to women in a row Rachel me her great, okay, so that's fucking racist I know right That is very sexist Women should follow women should follow women Like this is problematic. Yeah, I follow a fat guy on my tour Just like Do you have a bit about that by the way when you go out as soon as I walk out I go give it up for my son And there's a slight pause of oh my god

Every time there's like Oh my god. Oh my god. Seven people have asked me on the tour if I'm actually his son. And two people came up to me like I was Bobby. Like, oh yeah. Damn. You're like, hey man, your opener is horrible.

You get a holiday in. You're a real thing guy. So you're on this tour, it's amazing. It's amazing, everything's great. She's awesome. Yeah, of course you got to say all this stuff because you want to keep doing it. And then she'll write a book in the wrong file. I was in her book. So we in yours?

We do Atlanta and Atlanta. Atlanta was like killer. She like murdered and she's in the zone and brought people on stage did a whole thing and like made But she did she have like a Projector she's doing yeah, what is that she does a whole thing with I don't want to give away or act because you know She's gonna shoot something with it But like she does a whole thing with like pictures of hot women and then her and like to show like in a bikini. So it's like Okay, not you know like like models like she's like a oneini. So it's like, um, okay, not like, you know, like, like, models, like,

it's like a one man show, like a one woman show. It's just like a two, two minute thing at the end. Okay. And so then she, she's doing all those Trumps over to land a killing. And then so the next night she's like, fuck, I'll do it in Tampa. And that was a story. Is it all new stuff? It's all new.

Is she? Yeah. Did she just write it on the plane? Or yeah, she's kind of writing it as the campaign goes along like as the election gets closer you know. So did I move filler in that the fucking Tampa is where all the fucking lunatics go from the east to come down to be free and have a gun and no no. The tires on the truck next to her at the going to the hotel didn't trigger her off the fucking Dixie flag. How many Dixie American flags on the back of trucks? Yeah. Oh yeah. Not then huh? Rebel flag? No, yeah. Yeah. It's real. Yeah, it's real. That's a real. It's real down there.

Everybody has a gun down there. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, there's a gun. Yeah. Cool. She's a seal. See if Kumi you know so she goes up on stage and what happens so she's killing killing you know all the relationships of the sex stuff murdering and then she's like I were gonna talk about Trump for a minute booing booing and then she's like fuck Trump truck sucks Hillary blah blah joke joke joke then she brings up a Trump guy like a supporter and they have a thing on stage like a little debate and then the guy eventually goes I fuck I'm just voting for him because I hate Hillary and she's like get that out of here

And so people just filing out and I was up in the the concession area talking to a damn and I just see all these people angry furious rich white people walking past me like can you believe this shit? I can't people are shaking they went to the the, the guest service booth, got their money back. Really? Yeah. Wow, really? Wow. I'm gonna buy that shirt, because I'm gonna burn it. She was my hero, fuck her.

She, what the fuck she doing? Stick to jokes, your piece of shit. I mean, people were going nuts. How long have you been upset? I'm gonna set by an hour, 10. She probably went in at 40 minutes in. Oh wow. So she was murdered.

Did she recover from it? She did, because all the people left, the people who stayed loved her. How many people left? 200 to 50. How many people there? Eight thou. So, so, wow. Pretty good news for the election. Yeah. That's, that's like, that's true. Yeah. But these people have a poll of who supports it. It shows how clueless they are. Not really. Who can. Around 5,000 of them. There's just people pleases. Right. And probably Trump supporters aren't going. They're probably nickel chases. Like, I'm not leaving a pin.

Yeah. I would let the bitch finish. Yeah. A lot of them probably, like, I'm still going to try fuck her afterwards. Right. I don't know if they like that. No.

Nobody agreed with it. That was a weirdest thing. Like, well, they're waiting out in the back. Yeah, she's going to jet with sushi. They can't get to her. Yeah. They really, yeah, they're're gonna be waiting by the bus The limo. J.a. Peace am here. We're gonna try to fuck you. Yeah

I think the rapist yeah So so they're fucking pissed off Fear I came to scribe it was like the 50s like these jiggaboo's are playing rock and roll You know, that's what it felt like You don't think I'm fucking isolated and that's what it felt like, you know. You know what the gun fuckin' isolate and that and put it in front of my job. Hey, you might change lives, you never know. These chicken poos are playin' rockin' roll.

Love it, you know what they're like. They're dancing in there, you know? Like old south. What did you do? Were you trying to calm them down? I was walking by, going, they were going, you were good, and I was like, thank you. You were making a little tea,

trumpy, trumpy. Yeah. Who are you voting for? I was a lot of that. You were making a little T. Trumpy, Trumpy. Who are you voting for? I don't vote. I never have. I've never voted. Have you ever registered? Have you had to pick somebody two day?

I like that Gary Johnson. No, Hillary or Trump. I guess I go Hillary. You better. If you want to keep fucking riding that shoes. Yeah, you're just embarrassing to me. He's a joke. I mean, he's hilarious right silly very

funny yeah like a roast battle well they were talking about them and how are the other day and and it's like he said something pretty interesting he i don't think he do he was gonna get this far right i think like howard did it howard ran for governor a long time ago and he backed out because he started winning and really yeah he was fucking winning and he was like look i'm just changing three things and a fuck out and

he wanted to make uh... construction on the roads at night which he did by the way they actually did but yeah he started winning so he's like now they're gonna start and he was trying to not win. Yeah, he was saying a rage Just like he's just murder people. I mean he was saying I'm just shit. Yeah, he started winning is like I'm out because now they're gonna start looking into me Right, and they got to find some awful shit. The porn I look at you know, it's just duck So he's like I'm out see you and he backed the fuck out. Wow, Trump is such a crazy person that he probably didn't think he was gonna get this far, and then he did, and then he got addicted to that fame.

You know what I mean? How many comics do we know that don't have fucking 15 minutes of good material that become famous, and then go and do a bunch of shit they shouldn't do, because they're addicted to the, they believe the people around them. Exactly. Nobody's, I mean, all the other comedians are like,

you stink, but they're like, I mean, all the other comedians are like, you stink. Yeah. But they're like, I know, I'm good. They're my manager, my agent, my fans. My money. Yeah, but they're all gonna fucking leave you someday. Right. And you're gonna be fucked.

Yep. How many times does that happen? Almost every time. Yeah. That's the most common thing. That's it. Yeah. You know, but when they're in it,

that you know, they're believing it. Yeah. I think you got addicted to this Yeah, I'm winning. I'm winning. I'm winning and they especially in the debates Right he was just fucking annihilating these idiots because they didn't know what to do because there's such funny politicians Yeah, they know how to just be a politician. They don't know how to be real They were all waiting for him to get out of the election He they know when attacked him early because they're like oh, he's a joke. He'll do well for a couple weeks Then he's gone and then he's gone.

They fucked him up. And then he just, like, there was literally memos from his campaign that leaked. They were like, all right, let's just try and get second place. Let's stay in this for six weeks. Yeah. And then that was literally the plan was to be second place in a lot of these elections to up his profile. And now he could be pressed.

I mean, he's probably not going to be, but it's crazy. How far he got? Something crazy. We say probably not every step of the way. Right every you know Reagan was Reagan was 20 I think 20% behind at this point too. Reagan the second debate was shit too. Reagan was not supposed to be president. He was so far behind wait what year president Reagan with the first year he ran. 84, I think, didn't he? Nope. He was not supposed to be president. Hmm.

Wow. Yeah, Carter, right? He'd be Carter. He was, they were like, he's not going to happen. He's just, he's just a joke. Right. He was a fucking joke. He was an actor.

He was an actor. He was taking jokes. He actually had some good luck. But he was so far behind and then he came back at one. And he was our fucking president. Yeah, yeah. Same as a joke. It's not that crazy to see Trump coming back having a fucking landslide having a rally what I know and I know but they've been saying that the Iran many times I heard somebody go he's not this is what I've heard three times during this whole

election I know that's what I'm saying he's believe me look at me right you're right you're right you're right you're right you're not you've said it to me i know i thought i thought you've got a rubio is not gonna be the candidate there's no way i just think it's three weeks from the election and he's been getting hit by scandal after scandal after scandal women are just not voting for him it's just i mean you never know though honestly you who if the polling is correct but all the polling looks like it's either a landslide for Hillary or she's going to win, I don't know.

And also I think Reagan had the Iran hostage crisis helped him, I think. I don't know, there was some weird shit going on there, but- Whatever it was, man, you don't know what's going to happen. Who the fuck knows? One week he's winning, next week he's grabbing, and pussy's, Billy Bush is on. Billy Bush. There's more shit too come out. Poor the club, damn it.

So, who knows. I mean, I hope, look, the closer we get, I'm just like, what the fuck? I just can't wait for Dan. Yeah, I can't wait for Dan, I'm so sick of it. Yeah, but SNL's good again. That's true, but yeah. That's one thing I'm happy about.

That was funny. They mattered as, yeah. The only time SNL's funny is when the Republican party has a fucking lunatic on their hands. That's the only time SNL is just on fucking fire. Yeah. Yeah, then they're rest of the show. Sarah Palin.

Yeah. Fucking great. Yeah. I don't know why they're not bringing her back on SNL somehow with Trump. And I know Bernie would Larry David. It was all great. It was so great.

And now so 200 people walk out of this place. What is she, is she fucked up after? Not at all. I couldn't believe she kind of, I think she kind of this place. What is she, is she fucked up after? Not at all. I couldn't believe it. She kind of, I think she kind of dug it. She was like, it's a cool time to be alive. We're in the van back to going to the jet and she was like, that was crazy, huh?

And then we just drank scotch and played poker on the jet. And it was all forgotten. I think there's a point when you can look at your balance on your ATM at an ATM and go, I don't give a fuck. Yeah. You can fucking, I don't give a shit. In your private jet, just checking your banking account. No, I'm serious.

And I know that's sad to say, artistically, you want to just say it now, but there's a point where 200 people walk out of a room and get their money back. If 200 people walked out of my room, the room would be empty. Right, right. You know what I'm saying? Part of it is gone.

Yeah. Right. Like that. I would, I would, I would be really affected. But she hates Trump and she would solve about Hillary and now look how cool it looks that all these write-ups absolutely. So it'd be like she's a fucking hero. Anything totally worth it.

Anything Amy does, I think, even when it's a fuck up turns into good for her. Right. Right. Because not I think number one too she truly does believe in Hillary. Oh yeah. She doesn't she does Hey Trump. Yeah. So it goes to say if you believe in something it doesn't fucking matter. Yeah. It's not going to affect you. I have it by the way. If you want to listen to it. Yeah, it gives a good sound quality. There. That's not the greatest. Yeah. This is cool. Oh, please let him off. Yeah, please let him off.

Pause it for a second. I wish she didn't do this. This scares me. You don't let a fuck. Listen, you do not bring a fucking Trump guy. Clubs are a kid. He's on the side of the stage. I know.

I know. And Clubs, he's the only guy to ever want by my side at that situation But she's gonna be careful. Yeah, I mean that's no fucking Joe comedy or not You're in fucking Tampa everybody's carrying you know down. No, I don't know. No, she said bring them up She can't do that anymore. You can't I don't want to fuck off a bit something happened to you know And even if it's fucking they just wrestle around she's wearing a skirt happen to you know and even if it's fucking they just wrestle around she's wearing a skirt right I mean and nobody wants those photos right I don't want to see you know

I mean I mean that's like me you know fight the guy takes my shirt off like a poppy style now I'm just gonna think about the politics of it there's gonna be look at Fatsos tits. Yeah, it is side fat. Go ahead. She's freaking it. Maybe even just because he doesn't seem like someone is going to start throwing punches or he seems like a nice guy. He's a nice guy. You're a best. You're a best. But I'm Amy.

I'm Amy. Do. Nice to meet you. Thank you so much. I know the colors are pretty much the same. Just to know, I appreciate you for having us. I'm in no way trying to show you. This is going to be a round and front of us.

I just want to say something. I'm going to say something. I'm going to say something. I'm going to say something. I'm going to say something. I really love you. I appreciate it. I appreciate it. I'm in no way trying to show you. This isn't going to be a round of friday. I just really want to know. So tell me why Trump has your vote. Because I can't trust him. Okay, that's... Stop for one second. That's a lot of cheers.

Stop for one second. I'm going to tell you right now. Look at me and Star Rose, I think we fight about this once a day on the road. I mean, really? Yeah. But as soon as we hit a dumpling house, we do, oh, dumplings, and we get out. Literally.

That's how, but I want that away from you. It's fucking ruined my whole day. Bobby's talking about an apple. Those people don't know which. Fucking worst. Fucking ruin my whole day Bobby's talking about an apple Fucking worst But these these fucking Hillary is I mean Hillary is a fucking piece of shit though her husband's a haunted garbage I mean as a woman. I don't even know how you even fucking condone what he did. I don't even know how, but then again, she even buried it.

She didn't even go, look, I'm standing by my husband. He's an asshole, piece of shit, and he messed up, but I gotta stand by him. If she had said that, I'd be behind her. I'd be like, okay, look, she loves her husband, she loves her family, and she knows she's gonna help him work through this shit but we're literally just forgetting that this guy was the biggest misogynistic piece of shit that was in the office and fucked in the office and did hard shit to women and women came out and called him on it he lied to everybody and then said he did it because he got

fucking caught with jizz on a dress yeah Yeah, I mean his sperm on a fucking dress That's how far we had to go with this fucking lying hunk of shit. Yes, and then and I mean, I mean this is crazy What he did he did Trump said grab it. He verbally talked bullshit. Yeah, we've never seen him do it He's a fucking ugly mother fuck this guy actually did a bunch of crazy shit. Come on Trump did shit You don't name one thing Just name it right someone said he's just name it People I'm using it left and right dude. Okay last couple weeks. Okay, so I'm gonna say to you right now He is a piece of shit. Yeah, what about Bill Clinton?

Bill Clinton's not running for president, but what is he? Is the piece of shit when he was a president? yes, he was a good president so why would a woman who's a feminist condone that shit or actually just say look, yeah, you're right my husband's a hunk of garbage okay, but her choices are your choices are a hunk of garbage or the wife of a hunk of garbage

it's a lesser of two evils but she's not as bad as Trump right? yeah, that's true I don't know, I think she's proven. I think she's pretty evil. Here's why you vote for Hillary, ready? Yeah, because she'd do a better job. That's it. Yeah. Not because she's a better person. Not because she's lying less. Not because she's fucked us less. She's done all the same shit. Trump hasn't done any of the shit she's done. She's been a better person than that. She's done. Okay. shit Trump hasn't done any of the shit she's done she's been

This fucking country. She's done, okay? I'm not a truck is lied lied about fucking Benghazi her husband lied to the fuck and she was behind that back Them up lied to us to they were all behind the ship I'm doing Clinton stuff though because that's not she was part of the lie she lied 20 years She lied right she knew about it. She lied. She lied to all of us. Her husband sends it's not her. But she I can't you lie though when you lie you're a fucking liar. It's not because so if you lie for Mark, you're a fucking piece of shit too. All right. That's fine. But you're a piece of shit to my

my but but it might but there's a worse than that. You know, if you're lying about a sexual assault to a woman, you're a piece of shit too because you're not helping this woman. You're lying about a sexual assault to a woman. You're a piece of shit too, because you're not helping this woman. You're hurting her. You're a victim. You're fucking lying about the victim so she can't have her rights.

So she just has to fucking take it. So you're in on it. So you're just as fucking guilty, stop roast. Stop roast. Stop roast. You feel ashamed yourself. You're yelling into a mirror We gotta get your life together

If you're gonna put them if you're gonna say who's gonna who's gonna be a I think Who we're not who we're not gonna? You can just go live your matrix. I can get plugged back into the matrix into my little fucking jelly box and go back In the steaks and as many guns as I want. Hillary. Yeah. If you put this fucking loop again, well, I don't know what's gonna happen. Yeah.

Yeah, Putin said, yes, if you vote for Hillary, there'll be war. It's crazy. Oh, wow. He said that. It's crazy. I didn't hear that. Yikes, I didn't hear that either.

Damn. I gotta follow him on Twitter. Yeah. That makes me want to both Hillary you fucking bald cock I will take away your Levi's again. Yeah I got your horse. Yeah, take away your fucking yeah, I'm a child don't tell me not to do something You know what I mean? I'm gonna do it. I think the thing with it is Trump supporters are always like well I want somebody to speak their mind... it's trump supporters are always like well i want somebody speaks their mind and it's like

do you have i mean like that i don't think we want that well i don't know what it's like i don't know nobody wants to hear look you know i give her a lot of credit for bringing somebody up you know she could have just one of some fucking hillary ran she brought this fucking guy up said what do you got guy panicked i know he panicked because he should have had something immediately.

He was like, blah, blah, who well, you know. He didn't want to, you know, you're on the spot. Yeah. You're gonna walk through, what was it, 200 people left? You're gonna walk through 7,800 people that wanna kill you on the way out. That's true.

I don't know, look, do you bring up, do you go from, economics should be able to bring up whatever they want and deal with the consequences of it. Right, yeah, that's it. So, and she did, so God bless her, she doesn't care. Yeah, she was, she's happy about it. And the jokes, I bet the joke, here's the thing that bugs me

though, the Trump people, get the fucking joke. Right, he's not, He's not, Well, even though the people can't take jokes. Neither fucking side can take joke. Yeah, no, no, no. You have a lover, what the fucking side and but the other side but this fucking queen and make a joke in the car flips out right but the difference is the trump supporters talk about political

corregus being a problem but once it's aimed at them when something's uh... you know they don't agree with then they get then they become the liberal left you know they mean they become the same as pc warriors except about shit that they don't like. That's true. That's what's typical. They say you can say whatever the fuck you want.

I love the mark. If I say something, it goes, that's true. And if you say something, it goes, that is true. Yeah. It was a good point. And I know nothing about politics. I don't need the brother. I don't need the brother.

I know about fucking human beings. And I know what I like. And I know what's right and wrong in my life. I don't worry about the world. I worry about my world. And if more people did that, the world be a fucking better place. But everybody's worried about,

we all gonna be on this side of that side. If you're on that side, this is what you fucking believe. No, go look at the other side. The other side has some points, too. Right. Everybody has a fucking point. There is fucking, you know, right and wrong. That's why I'm in the middle.

I'm not a Republican. I'm not a Democrat're I think you're smarter if someone's in the middle I think you're smarter when it comes down if I'm in a fucking booth today. Hmm. Who am I gonna vote for? It's probably gonna be Hillary. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I won't have to worry about shit It will be the status quo the same shit. We've been going on my whole life And this now do I want to risk it and go you know what fuck it trump and see what happens? That's crazy. Yeah, yeah, it's crazy But what if you did it and what if he fucking just said fuck it and expose it all he took out that book of secrets Showed us where the aliens are

He was like holding up an alien look at this is Gary Aliens are He was like holding up an alien look at this is Gary Come on, you know that trick Tell an area 51 Yeah, I mean there is well they shoot him right away. That's the other thing. Uh-huh the fucking see somebody Yeah, yeah, somebody wouldn't they wouldn't allow that to have great with that beat to see the assassin as you know trumps head That'd be amazing. Yeah.

Yeah. If I was in the booth, I'd probably have to vote Hillary. I'm married to Mexicans and he called them rapists. Right. Antonio is a rapist. He's good. He's a rapist. You're calling he's good.

He's a wonderful man. You know. Do you have a day job? I just quit recently. Oh, I'm in between jobs, but yeah. I had that work data at Silverhouse. I'm a sugar daddy at the tortilla. Yeah, you have a sugar mama. You're a sugar baby. I am. Yeah, I'm a sugar mom. I'm a sugar baby. I looked into that by the way. You just you just know anything about sugar

baby. So you're on the plane. So she had no problem. She had a fun with it. Totally fun. And it's a bunch of free buzz and publicity and she's doing the garden two days later so i think i'll work out right yeah i mean good for her yeah it's weird though it seems like that when commerce gets to a certain point they get all uh... but women comets mmm like chris rock doesn't give a shit mc sci-felt giving a fuck a little activity the but some of them i think let me a little activity but

i mean i think it's because it you can actually do it without worrying about i think there was a certain point about your career i mean you would let me tell you something if some if there was a a right wing comic that was about to put you on a hit show and i guarantee you'd be a little less mouthy

when it can be your political views. Oh, for sure. Oh yeah, you would. But I wouldn't hold it against you. Right, right. Because $20,000, $30,000 in episode, you shut your little fucking Demi mouth. It's time for a job creation.

You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, who knows? I mean, do you really say what you want when you're, you know, especially in this business? And any fucking job, you can get literally fucking just wiped away for the wrong tweet.

Yeah, yeah. Well, is it in the fear of getting, just taking away like Tracy Morgan had to apologize? He's on a show. She doesn't really have anything right now. She doesn't have a show. It's all her own stuff. It's all right, but it's all right.

Yeah, but still, you take away your legacy I mean her she's built up a lot of shit I mean you know when she she says something that does something it's heard oh no I mean for sure man she I mean the one thing about her that she's behind it she's you'd be very careful Tracy was trying out new jokes. Yeah, you know, he's trying out new jokes and said, no, I'd stab a baggy, whatever. Yo, I'll stab a baggy. I'm pregnant. I do, I do, I do it too. The thing is, I think a fuck my wife before I leave the house,

reminds me of my son. Mr. Paul. Like Tracy, I got to get rid of this. It's a little in the room. Well, it's rich little in the room. Yeah. Well, it's rich big. Yeah.

Rich big. And there goes the name of the party. Pasha Lawrence, face light up. I don't know if you're rich. Safe. Oh, and there goes the second name. All right. But yeah, she's at least doing like Tracy Morgan's like,

hey, Faggot should all die or whatever that was it but she's like standing over something that she thinks it's good to her like I'm helping absolutely let's always Tracy Morgan you know yeah Tracy Morgan yeah well it's pretty it's pretty crazy I mean when she like that hat when she like that I actually like it I would have to say I like it. Yeah, it's because it's well, it's just you know It's so many of us go up and do high-jinks You know and then when you actually say something that is a little controversial

You know I see people walking out of my show all the time because I'm a little fucking dirty or whatever. Oh yeah. I'm a little edgy. I'll see people get up and walk the fuck out all the time. And it's like, good. I'm glad. I'm like, good. I'm glad.

It actually makes me feel good that I'm actually saying something that's not everybody in the fucking room like. Because then I'm just a monologue, late night fucking asshole that doesn't offend fucking anybody. What am I really talking about? My life is fucking nuts.

My thought process is creepy and fucking deform. And you know, that's just who I am. If I was up there and everybody was like, oh my god, then I'd be leaving some secret fucking life. At least I'm exposing these fucking twats to who I really am. And they're not liking it. And they're walking out. As long as you get up and walk the fuck out and don't say anything.

I don't need to hear your fucking critique. You know what I mean? That's a little ridiculous. It also shows where comedy is at in the world. Comedy is so big. It's so influential and people give a show. There's an arena here to see this girl talk and tell jokes and then they're walking out because they're not agreeing with it.

I mean, that's powerful. Yeah. Comedy's hot. Like, the president's lying, Hillary's lying, everybody's lying and every fucking clickbait, journalism is dead. It's all shit. You can't trust the news. Comedy's the last kind of real, real talk. Yeah, I think you're right.

Yeah. Yeah, perfect when people leave because then the next year you come back and those assholes aren't there. There you go. I just don't like one side hates the other. One side is, like I don't like one side is just our way is the right way. I know this I can fuck you. But hold on though.

No, fuck you. But let me see they're both wrong. They're both on. Hold on. Some people have a point. Like we just talked about your wife, right? Some people when the rhetoric, huh? Is wife? Yeah, Mexican people, right?

Yeah. They have a point to hate that side. Conservatives are like, and for years, they did it to gay people. But they don't have a point because he does have a point. We shouldn't just let anybody in this fucking country. We shouldn't let fucking people just come here who are illegal. Illegal immigrants, that's why there's a fucking border.

That's why when I come back from a rubric, I gotta wait three hours. Yeah, but you don't's why there's a fucking border. That's why when I come back from a rubra, I gotta wait three hours. And I'm a fucking citizen, but I don't mind waiting because I wanna make sure that people that aren't fucking supposed to be here, that don't have the proper paperwork like I filled out, like my grandparents and their grandparents and they're fucking people before them filled out,

fucking aren't here. You don't get the fucking come here just because you want to and that's not but you don't call them rapists and murderers yeah that's fine but I have a point to you can't help it with you both what you're saying you're saying it's one way or the other what he is saying over here is right that's why people are voting for them they're actually going all right this guy's a fucking idiot right what he said about mexican rapist and where he's an idiot he doesn't know how to fucking talk he doesn't know how to fucking and if you don't think the words that you don't are first of all if you don't think that people when they think of illegal people coming over they're

not they're thinking of the bad ones they're not thinking about his father and all they're not thinking about his his wife's family they're thinking about the bad ones. They're not thinking about his father and all. They're not thinking about his wife's family. They're thinking about the fucking bad cartel fucked up that are sneaking over here to get away from their country to bring drugs and fucked up shit here. That's who they're talking about. If you can't in your brain, realize that that's what they mean

when they wanna build a wall and make customs that's crazy. Yeah, but it's true because but no, but he's not saying that. Why should I have to fucking put it together? Well, why are you having it? It's a dog with me. Why do you want to get racist? We have to put together what you're getting at.

You have to, you have to. What do you know? Because if you're, if you say Trump is saying this, so that's what everybody on the Republican Party means. And everybody who's following him is like, yes, fuck dirty Mexicans, you're crazy. I'm not dumb, I didn't say everybody. You're fucking dumb. I didn't say everybody, but...

But you can't give a percentage. It is disturbing how many fucking white nationalist like Trump, fucking the KKK's behind Trump. David Duke is behind fucking Trump, dude. Of course, that's the problem. Of course, it's a major problem. It's not a problem because there's a lot of people that most people aren't.

Most people that are behind Trump aren't, you're taking a group and just sticking it over here and calling the whole group that. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying, you are, you're, you're, you're branding it. You're branding them KKK. No, first of all, that's just true. First of all, that's just true. You're taking them, you're taking that people.

I'm not a portion of it. That's like me saying that all fucking liberals are hippie shitheads that fucking follow fish around and don't know shit. Okay, let's say that then I'll take a hippie fucking shithead over a fucking white supremacist. Let me take some hippie shithead who's going to fucking, all right, Penn and Teller did this thing one time. Well, they went around a fucking hippie stupid fucking fish party with all your fucking idiot people that you love.

And they went around and said, we have to ban this. It's in every office, in every school. We have to get this out. And everybody signed it. We have to sign this big, no one was water. It was another turn. And you fucking, yeah, but listen,

that's not my point. But your point is this is these people are fucking idiots and you have your idiots, it's just a different idiot. Now, there are you, there's so much more dangerous. That's my fucking point. They're not fucking, they don't think fucking banning water could not knowing the fucking topic and just going, just following it like cattle.

It's not dangerous. It's not dangerous than actively wanting to get fucking Mexicans out of here and fucking wanting to fucking you know I don't want to get Mexican. I'm trying. I want to bring more Mexicans into America. I want more fucking Mexicans. You know why? Because they're fucking hardworking people.

They really are. I agree with this. You can't say that. No, listen, they're not all great. But they're fucking hard. As far as the immigrants that were letting into this country for the last fucking 50 years, Mexicans are hard working family oriented people. Do they live differently?

Yes. Are there fucking houses different? The way they, how many people live in, how many? Yes. They're smell? Yeah. Listen, everything's different but i'd rather i want more of them and do i believe that the border should be tightened

up do i believe that fucking we shouldn't let everybody in here do i believe that at this time right now that letting anybody in out of fucking political correctness or guilt is horseshit yes but because i don't want to fucking i want to walk around my streets and be okay i don't want to have to fucking worry about I have to it's becoming socially acceptable to fucking be Attacked or terror just hey you got to do you got to do why well first of all crime is down That's another thing that Republicans talk about all this doom and fucking everyone's getting rob and shit crimes In historic loan America of course it is it is in the New York to New York is great So why are these the fucking issues we're talking about? Why aren't we talking about fucking healthcare costs, reproductive rights for women, all this

kind of shit. Don't be a me started on global warming. They're just completely denied. That might be the biggest fucking risk. It's fucking, every fucking 10 million years the world goes through this. It's happened before. Yeah, that's good. That's good.

But no, and here's the other thing though, what we're talking about, like I don't like fucking Hillary. You're dumb. You're dumb. I'm not. You're really are. You're dumb. Play. You're the bait points back. I'm not. You're fucking dumb. You're dumb because you don't see the other side. You are this is my tone. You know yelling. Yeah, yeah. This is not yelling. This is passion. You've got your passion's regular person. Yeah I said that my passion is regular person My yelling is yelling sure. I showed you the difference. I know we've yelled We were yeah, he was yelling at me to tell me not to yell in the car

It was letting go stop yelling and I'm like I'm not fucking yelling. This is passion Then we kiss those pretty cool. We did really we really do fight a lot In the car, but it's all this shit and then as soon as we pulled up to whatever restaurant we Wrap it up. I'm a little split You guys We really close We got to wrap this up. that was a real debate that was great that was right tonight on TV I think I think we're fucked yes oh yeah yes we're fucked do I

see no debate needed there trump is a fuck it I don't know what the fuck it is I wish you I wish he wasn't an option yeah yeah it's embarrassing that he's an option. It is embarrassing Yeah, it's an option and but he what he's promoting If you if you take all the shit out the reason why people are voting for him because They want that that's the Republican fucking party. That's what they go for okay? So yeah race and then you go over it's not see see what he does dog whistle Residue you see what you see what you do you you you you you you're putting a swath over a fucking shit load of people it's not there's a lot of right public is there's a lot of republicans that are fucking racist

i'm sick of fucking people s-telling you either this side of that side fuck off there's a lot of people in the middle that don't know what the fuck to do historically that party has used racism and i a historical political. Historically, Democrats were racist. The Democrats, what was Lincoln? Republican, you fucking idiot. Like that's not a dare.

Free the slaves. Nothing's changed in two years. The only time you guys actually went for the black vote is to get the vote. That's, that's fuck, oh my god. That's just not historic. True, no, absolutely. Republicans do your research.

I would. I would. I would. I would. do your research I would I want to abandon when they say segregation yes Exactly the reason fucking the reason the South is a democratic anymore is because Democrats were like you know what black people are people who should have equal rights And then I was stopping them know they tried to start trying to First of all scopo oh shit No I am fucking it. Look at his store for fucking Jesus. No dude. Battle, battle, battle. Oh shit, it's all about going to be real. The reason Republican switch, the South used to be democratic, the reason it switched is because Democrats didn't want to be fucking race anymore.

So the Dixie-Crat Democrats fucking went to the Republican party. And the Republican party fucking starting with gold water, openly fuckinged racist that's what's been fucking happening and Carl rove did the same shit except with fucking gay people That's why there's fucking good turnout. That's why George W. Bush beat out. Go. Wait a minute We all take a look at scopos Studying face What do you got scopo? I'll just read it first. He's on redstate.com, by the way.

What is he supposed to go on? What a democrat? No, a fucking unbiased source. Go to fucking college for history. First of all, in the microphone dumb dumb. It's a podcast. Wall Street Journal, that's fair. Go, go, go. I got to read. I want to see you.

Fuck. You lost you two minutes are up. Thank you. A little fat demigod. You got it? What do you know? He's gonna quote zeitgeist. The reason why the Christians, the sign of the cross, the the Mayans, the sun would come up dark was bad because crops couldn't grow in the night that that's when all the animalist came out and three days after in December that's when christ was born that's when the sun started going back up again what he got i'd listen to take for it i'm saying is is your fucking idiot

because you always got to say i think i think the democrats i think both sides have very great points i voted for i'd vote a democrat two times okay and i'm i'm just saying that i i think you if you're a if you can't look at the other side but the and go you know what i understand that that makes sense i do i wish i would shut up

i wish that they you know i mean i wish. I wish I shut up. I wish that they, you know what I mean? I wish they, you know, this other side could see that. Right. You know, it's like they can't like women have an abortion. That's a sin. I mean, come on. You should not be allowed to. If you fuck up, you keep it.

It's murder. It's murder. What about the morning after Bill? He's like, I believe in gay marriage, as long as I have the same race. That's a fucking good joke. tell you that morning after bill is like uh... i believe in game average as long as of the same race that's a lot of that's the

uh... did you fall this is the best that he just they defended slay for the nineteen fifties all right what who did no no no who which democrat name one democrat from the nineteen fifties candidate in the nineteen centuries other is reading word for word

that don't fuck with them let it have a shot don't fuck with self-esteem that's not that's comprised of what i can't read that i can see that right uh... you read it for me i can't really see that right the first line right here that helping case i can't see my eyes are not good. It doesn't look good. In the 19th century,

so Southern Democrats comprised whites in the south who believed in Jefferson democracy. In the 19th and the 18th, 1850s, they defended slavery in the United States and promoted expansion into the West. They shut up. If you're going to fucking talk over me, I'm going to smash you cuz that's what you fucking do when you're nervous Let's not ever then stop yapping over people and fucking about the appetizers Yeah, but that's what you do you parade people as they're talking you keep interrupting it and throwing zingers saying stupid Don't fucking call me a fucking idiot dude, okay? Because without an education I fucking come a long fucking way you can

How did this head turn into this? Because I'm sitting there, I'm trying to read this shit And you think you're a fucking genius because you know a couple things because you grew up in Washington You're just a fat oompa. I'm reading let me fucking read shut your face Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. I know why I'm backing scope. I know. It's crazy. Literally down. I'm going down a black hole. You just read it. I just snapped on my fucking honey pig.

I'm just right by the way. So I don't know. You're not right. That's what you don't. That's what you don't. We just read the wrong. You're fucking dumb. What year did that say scope? It said 1850s. Okay, what did I say in the 60s? All the shifts switched 1960s. I'll find it to a little podcast got a lot of range. You know we listen, uh, catwalks. There's a deal. You need to fucking stop thinking you're right because you're not but in this specific case, I just am right. You're not. It's just a fact that I know

the fact is is that, okay, people so the both parties will go for the vote The fact that you please don't be that fucking naive to think that the Democrats are some fucking white-winged angels That are out there and they're so honest. They're hunks of garbage to absolutely all of them. I wanted boner burning all of them Listen, they're all listen listen It's about money and power. It's worse than fucking show business Okay, I met them. I spoke at a dinner. I met all these fucks and I talked to them and it's the most phony shit I've ever I've never met the Phoneier people in these fucking people who are in office. I agree with you. It's all a hunk of shit I every show you watch

Exposes every show about politics exposes how fucking evil and fucked up Do you think they just the guy who writes that has this amazing imagination? It's facts. It's from fucking facts Okay, so stop with the fucking Democrats agree their hunks is shit. I never said that. Yeah But you you you you you you you you you you you, but you yeah But you don't you always say this shit. You never say anything about your party. It's not my fucking party There it is. No, it is not I wanted fucking Bernie to win. I don't like Hillary. He's a fucking Imagine if he won that'd be great. It'd be we'd be living in utopia. We'd have free everything until you fucking go on sick pop they got your own yeah exactly i would love for him to win and then you to hit it just something just a business go fuck it back up and then you just crying

over all the money you don't make i would have a tax shelter in Ecuador if that happened exactly you fucking be legal you'd be a piece of shit yeah exactly i was a joke but now it's got matter so no i think that's my joke to i play a character Yeah, exactly. That was a joke, but he just got mad at me. So no, that's my joke too. I make America. I'm trying to act like fucking heaven. All right, listen, what we've learned here today is that me and you have passion. Yeah. And these two fucking squares

haven't been. Yeah, a couple voices, I guess. Yeah. A couple voices and he's a flip-flopper in the middle. Yeah, yeah, I like both, both make great points. I understand. I accept my point is I think both of them make great points. I think Hillary has great point. I think Trump is a fucking moron,

but if you look beyond that, yeah, we do have to tighten our borders. We have to, it's almost obvious. The things that they both say are obvious shit. Of course. And it's like we're sitting and going, this is, oh, we have to, yeah, yeah, you have to tighten the borders, you fucking idiot.

So hard to watch is cringing when they're just like, so what are you gonna do about this? And like, well, I have Latino friends, you're like, oh, shut the fuck up. What are you doing? That's not even Hillary was like on breakfast club, and she was like, I put hot sauce on all my chicken. That was, that was the,

robot just right there. That's right racist. Yeah, it's right, it's like a robot racist. That's racist, that's racist. That's racist, it's racist. That's fucking racist. It's actually true, she likes it. I need to say a black thing. But is that a racist statement?

To like hot sauce? To say it to a gay number like a room when it's not true. I think she's not, she doesn't say it. No, I couldn't. I didn't. Why am I defining Hillary? Is it racist? It's not racist, but it's not racist.

It isn't racist, but it's pandering. Okay, you know what I read? I was trying to look for a good neighborhood to bring Max to for trick-or-treaten. It's my neighborhood's good, but there's not that many kids. So I don't wanna bring the doorbell and nothing. There were people rummaging inside, putting their pants on cause they're jerking off the mark.

So I was like, I don't even rings the doorbell. No fans. I was trying to find the five best neighborhoods in Westchester cause I want to drive there. Yeah. Park the car and just walk a couple blocks. Yeah. And I read on the thing it said one lady was like, I heard about Dobbs Felly. Felly, I know, Sleepy Hollow is a great town to go to because it's, you know, blah, blah,

blah. It's a nice little quaint town and it's with a headless horseman. Right. And then the next line and not even trying to be racist just some lady Was like it is nice up there, but there's a lot of Spanish people and I don't know if they know what Halloween is Maybe you can get a Mexican candy ball or something like that, but I would go to Terry town, which is a Better town and a quaint or town to do trick-or-treating it. Wow. So she was just like that bad I mean she framed as a cultural issue, which is fine. Well, it's just about just Spanish people are going to see. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. It's good. It's good. It's good. It's good. It's good.

It's a true. It's all good. You guys do Halloween? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. I got to get out here. Yeah. I can't believe I actually backscope. Oh I just like to argue with my baby boo. Yeah, I really do like fucking argue. He's just a one-sided Every once in a while though, he goes you bait me and I'm like I just smile I was gopoo trying to read Every once in a while though he goes you baiting me and I'm like yeah, I just smile Always This part was gopal trying to read Great I can read you got fucked up of the word compromise Okay, let's go through this. What do you have at Stavvy baby on Instagram?

Sta vvy baby and I'm on the true story to her with Bob come see oh actually fuck October 24th It come on everybody at what yeah, it's a bar. It's a bar called it's a bar called come on everybody Come on everybody. I thought you doing your podcast there. It is a podcast show there It's called it's called funny moms the live shows called funny moms. They come on everybody. Joe Liz is on it Sarah tollemage Pee-Dabra. It's gonna be a good show. So come check that out, please. I just said I have to go during your plugs.

I'm so sorry. I'm running late, I'm gonna ask all. Okay, yes. We're gonna have to do that thing later. Okay. We'll do it Friday. All right, cool. All right, cool.

Mark Norm at Twitter, at Mark Norm and Instagram, what are my website for dates? Doing my special on the 17th November. Come on out, but eat fans in the room. It's at a synagogue in a lower side. Our special Comedy Central. That's when Nome got married, dude. Is that right?

Angel or Resence? Yeah, holy shit. Nome got married there. It's a beautiful space. Beautiful, beautiful. I'd really fight for it to get it. Yeah, Dennis Therry shot a special there. Really?

Oh fuck. That's TNT. Why, Dennis Therry's great. Sure the end, it's T.T. Why, Dennis Larry's great. Sure, sure. It's great. Oh man. This just can't do.

Can you do lyrics? I don't know. All right, smart. I don't want to shoot a special way. Anybody shot a special before? I thought no one had. Nah, well, fuck. There you go.

Who did it? Comedy Central? Yeah, they did it there too. They did it. Ah, ah, ah. Damn it there too. They they did Bang bulls old I'm gonna What do you got buddy besides weird hair weird hair? Yeah, you look like an elf Sorry

There's DJ people at that good rid people at that? Good riddance. You're the riddance, man. Horrible people. I'm sorry that everybody's dead. That's OK. I still have a dad, so that's cool. I'm going to be at the comedy zone in North Carolina on the 27th to the 30th with Mike Lawrence. Good luck.

And then the finals of the Rose Battle tournament are November 1st at the stand 103030 should be a lot of fun. Are you a comic book guy? Yeah, I'm a comic book guy. Oh cool. Yeah, I thought Mike made you wear those Yeah, he just makes me eat combos with them. Um, combos. Oh Jesus Christ. He had come in No, my god, he makes me eat come. Yeah It's the eating come tour This is worth it though for the stage time yeah that's how we got this breath oh this is the Tuesdays of stories sorry yeah you have great part Joe let's

you never plug that I forget every time this is a come down everyone listen to come down thank you what do you got at Chris go bone twitter instagram Facebook your dates well Lauren what do you got just Chris go bone Twitter Instagram Facebook your dates? Lauren, what do you got just out Lauren? Coobear Lauren Coobear you did a good job today. I think I did that was a question We back live well. We're live. How that though? We've been live since School I got you. Sorry, but you know that's okay. I appreciate it's good

I'm sorry if I did anything that made you feel bad during our heated exchange You know what I would we go to therapy together. He went before me Oh, you got a l. Yeah, I know that you I know that you talked about me going to the airport early Oh, we're no he didn't send it. He slipped. Oh He was give me he was give me a rant about something. He goes, and you know, this and that, and get to the airport early, and go, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I know, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

I know what he's talking about. Oh, man. Actually, we got something, you got bumped actually. Yeah, big happened to my life. You look fun with that, huh? What happened to my dad? What happened to my dad?

What happened? I don't want to get into it right now. Just a little bit. Some friends of mine betrayed me. Really? We could talk about it in a different, really? Yeah, yeah.

We talk about it in a, we're gonna do another show me and you. Okay. We trade you. On Friday. Oh yeah, it's bad. Piece of shit. We'll be talking about it.

Really? He's giving us a little plug and we'll be on them. Come on the show next week, we'll finish it. Give a little tease. Well, it has something to do with that girl I couldn't get over for a while. Oh. A very good friend of mine.

Oh. Oh. But what you do for this friend? Every, girl? I couldn't get over for a while. Oh, very good friend of mine. Oh, damn. But what'd you do for this friend? Every dude, I can't get into it right now. I'm gonna fucking start breaking shit. I can't. Oh, really? Oh yeah. So we're gonna talk about it on our show.

Okay. Yeah, we do. We do. No, we do for the tour. We do Facebook Live. We do it on our own. We do it on our own. We do it on our own.

We do it on our own. Come on, we do it on our own. Anyway, we can talk about it. I was pissed. I was good. 20 minutes. Can we talk about it? You want to talk about it on the podcast next week? Maybe yeah, yeah Maybe a pie gets better than Facebook live. I feel like why I was talking instead of people interjecting and shit like that live You know what I mean? I have stover as you faggot over here. I'll shut comment on it anyway. We'll fit we'll talk about it Oh, look at you. I just get red. Yeah, I know I can't. Oh, nice. Get this guy another piece of cake. I will listen Friday night. We're going to be in me and Starvars comedy connection.

Rhode Island, one of my favorite clubs Friday, Saturday. So make sure we're going to get wings Friday, ting tingling at bonehead. Can't wait to go there. And then next week we're at Gotham get your tickets now. Go to robbercowley live dot com. What else we got? Gotham comedy live dot com for tickets. If you want to send anything into the studio, 117 McDougal Street, 10012, care of Robert Kelly. If you want to come on the show, email YKWD producer at rycast.com. We got a bunch of people coming in next week actually.

All right, great. What nine o'clock at night? Yeah. All right, nine at night. We're doing it next week. next week actually all right great what nine o'clock at night yeah all right nine at night we're doing it next week uh... we got to be we got bird it's gonna be great bird crashes on next week so uh... let's do this you guys are the best fans of the world make sure you join the premium channel download the app for free iPhone Android one and a month we got a lot of fucking premium content up there right now you can enjoy shit that other people don't get to see creeps with kids the whole show is up there. The Bailey and Matt interview we did the podcast is up there. We're going to be doing stuff this weekend. Maybe we'll put up a premium thing.

Let me get some fucking licks from your fucking tragedy. No, I'm kidding. All right, I'll see you guys next week. Thanks for coming on the show and I'm going to listen to the show and that's it. You know what, dude? You've been listening to the YKWD podcast. Thanks for listening. Now go back to your shitty jobs. Check out riotcast.com for all the best podcasts on the internet and they're all free and they're all free. con volotea, la región de Murcia nunca ha estado tan cerca, espectacularismos, monumentos, rincones de película y un sincín de aventuras desperan. ¡Fliparás! Vuelades de madrida murcia y a otros destinos que te sorprenderán a partir de 19 euros.

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